#and yeah. break. uh. idk

[leroibobo]

during its apartheid years, south africa had one of the strictest media controls in the world. this extended into homes when television was introduced in the country in 1977 (which the government had delayed until that year due to fears of "undue influence"), and when home video came along with it. each videotape that was legally distributed during these years was required to have a notice in the official languages of english and afrikaans that it complied with media censorship laws codified years prior.

(the model for the certificate was likely influenced by the british board of film classification's. by the beginning of the 20th century, the british had brought the template with them to south africa and other former colonies such as india. south africa was probably the only country to use it on home releases.)

this meant that south africans who watched "legal" videotaped movies not only had to sit through commercials and a standard-issue anti-piracy warning, but a federal confirmation that the film didn't feature an interracial couple, among many other things. the total time for the two warnings could reach up to two minutes long - for comparison, the chorus of "oops i did it again" by britney spears is twenty seconds long - but some were rushed through.

this example was taken from a tape of disney's snow white and the seven dwarfs published in 1994, the year apartheid ended. the media censorship laws which required the certificate would be overhauled two years later, though video openings remained similar for a while after.

#south africa #info #obviously there were ''illegal'' tapes smuggled in like in every other country w/ similar laws #i also added the model thing bc many people (particularly mericans like myself) aren't used to seeing whole ass Certificates at the #beginning of movies. that being said it was a theatres thing and not a home releases thing in the uk india etc #the mpaa ratings bumpers were always a lot more sparse and less official-looking #absolutely nothing to do with architecture but it fit more here than on my main. vhs history etc #and yeah. break. uh. idk #btw the /sraeli government did the exact same thing w/ television and ended up caving in '67 #(not /as/ late but still pretty damn late) #the year being significant had nothing to do w/ it #it was because the general population were getting televisions so they could tune into broadcasts in neighboring countries #(palestine is small so not too hard) #and they c-couldn't have people watching ARAB TELEVISION!!!! THE HORROR!!!!!!!!!!!

[danothan]

man just let the guy take you out on a date already

#hal: dw man even if the JL breaks up we'll still have each other #barry: yeah? <:] #barry: hey uh btw… can i take you out to dinner? #unbelievably smitten my god #halbarry #hal jordan #barry allen #green lantern #the flash #panels #dc #danbles #their love languages are so incompatible it’s a wonder how they make it work #but that’s the mystery of their entire relationship isn’t it #yes i am always going to bring up ‘what do you even see in each other?’ ‘ykw… idk! ☺️’

[scopophobia-polaris]

Honestly could we throw out the idea that totk's story issue is that it isn't consistent with the lore of the older games but instead drops intresting world building from botw because it might have gotten actually dark

#seriously eveeyone keeps up bring up the triforce not being the same like the older games instead of HEY why DOES the royal family just..... #have it #like all of it #and was the sheikah tech from the last game that functions the same was as light arrows/the biden blast was uh #how do i put this #how did they weaponize lightmagic in robots and does this all tie in with the “banishment” thing #or idk dropped point from botw zelda's fucking chracter arc #i know it ended with LOOOK!!!! YOU FUCKED UP BY DOING WHAT YOU THOUGHT WAS RIGHT #But damn they could of just not done that shit in totk making her just the #what was jt #idk man they just keep taking away her agency #man and it sucks cuz the dragon is so cool but mf shes forced to do it what she gonna do stay in the past and DIE? #idk man it just all feels hasty. makes me sad #and it sucks cuz a lot of shit shit is really cool and intresting but man idk i may become a botw zelda deserved a better weiter for her #becuase girl she needs a break. not saying chracters cant go through hardship #but there is something so nasty about the framing of youll never be anything but eveey past princess zelda trope and nothing more #instead of a crystal she turns into a dragon like guys this is the same as skyward sword but idk man is it werd to say #when Hylia does it aginst a thing that wants to steal the god triangles and is also a god its like yeah you had no other choice #how the fuck did one fuckass stone make ganondorf into a god like being you would think that like #mannwhy are the stones THAT powerful and why werent the other bitches able to take them down what because #did #did rauru give sonia the equivalent of the one ring at their wedding hey wait a fuck #sorry for all my spelling mistakes but what the fuck man

[house-of-daena]

#» asmo talks #sorry guys #i have 0 energy go even interact here for a while 💔 #so uh back go lurking i guess #im just dreading to get back to work #also playing pokemon #idk mental's been bad so yeah another asmo break #anyways ill try to write n mass post when i get back #cyaa

[imminent-danger-came]

About Macaque's death- it's been raised that in the flashback, we can see what looks like a battlefield around him. Some have even spectacled that the mountain Macaque brings MK to in his debut episode is the same battlefield.

And...when Sandy flashbacks to what seems to be Sha Wukong's memories...what do we see but a battlefield?

I think your thought that there was two battles between Macaque and Wukong, if Wukong did kill Macaque (I believe he didn't), is correct. However, Wukong spared Macaque the first time, probably bc Macaque hadn't done anything too bad to the pilgrims. The second, he didn't...

Because Macaque succeeded in killing the pilgrims.

Let me set up a screenshot conspiracy board real quick:

I swear these are all related (I've mentioned this before somewhere). I don't know how or why, but deep in my heart I want to believe this battle will be touched on.

Now, I don't know if the battle that took place is related to SWK & Macaque's fight or not, and I'm also not positive that there even were 2 fights (I was just throwing stuff out there), but Macaque killing the pilgrims (or more likely just having a hand in their death, "I didn't do this!" "You weren't not involved" anyone?) is definitely something to consider.

#Is me writing on screenshots in red pen unnecessary? yes #is it fun while also contributing to the vibe? also yes! #idk lmk could bring anything back they literally brought the 1x03 sandy tape joke back ''Maybe we could find some magic tape?'' #Which *looks at MK breaking the pinball machine sadly* #*picks up phone* Oh yeah? Yeah. Uh-huh. yeah I'm thinking too much about the lego show again. Yeah. Like I do every night. Uhuh. #lmk #lego monkie kid #lmk theory #asks #My ultimate crack theory: Macaque helped past life (aka EAMK) MK kill the pilgrims #Schrödinger's theory. Can be neither proven or disproven atm

[mustangs-flames]

.

#took my anxiety meds and did my cbt exercises and am doing a bit better now #turns out i had forgotten to take them today #and a bunch of random stuff triggered a bit of a spiral #one of those being about horror story creation and how anyone who writes/makes horror content is- #inherently an evil person and shouldn't be making it. so yeah. uh. seeing that during an anxiety episode didn't help out at all lmao #i got scared thinking i had hurt everyone in the world by writing a horror series #despite. you know. tagging all my stories age-appropriately. tagging content. and even providing content warnings on each chapter #like. i think i do a lot more than some creators do when being responsible about horror or handling certain topics in my writing #especially because of the religious trauma #and the bad childhoods and parents. and the fear of god and how it can negatively impact one's queerness and identity #and i mean. i've always been clear that if i ever forget to tag something that all you have to do is let me know and i will fix it asap #idk. not saying i'm like a beacon if perfection but i try to rationalise to my anxiety that i am doing the most i can #if that makes sense? #anyway. sorry about my break earlier #tw: vent

[linabirb]

the feminine urge to delete all your sideblogs

#but tumblr is a weird website so it can delete this blog too so. uh #idk. i don't have any motivation or inspiration to do anything at all #like i get it for one second just bc someone liked smth #andddd that's it. it's like i just want attention atp and i don't enjoy what i'm actually doing #[ 💚 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐚 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐬 ] #edit: and i can't even just go on a hiatus or a break bc guess what usually i realize that i never needed that blog and that i'd be better- #without it. so it's like. yeah.

[train-fans-anonymous]

Guys my 2000 word Rodimus angst fic got deleted from my drafts because I forgot about it ☹️

#It feels wrong calling it an angst fic because it’s meant to be abt my struggles with mental health but idk how else to describe it #because in a way it IS angsty but the experience is more than just a genre or category #I hit like a road block while writing about it due to uh more mental health stuffs which is ironic #but yeah it’s gone now sooo #Idk if I should rewrite it #It wouldn’t be the same #I honestly didn’t expect it to hit 2000 words but thems the breaks #but yeah I forgot I had til the 16th and now all that emotion is just gone. #we in sad boy hours now

[henriiiii-1001]

( I put that Malus calls Ces' mom "sis" because they could either be biological sisters or just sisters-in-law And it's Amanda accompanying Evie cause Cesar is still a frog at this point ) [I know you got plans for Amanda but I wanted to try and write her before shizz starts going down]

-Ladies of the Torres-Miller annual ladies picnic , lunch is served

*Torres side of the table going excited*

-You know, I heard that in Yonder one of the king's brothers is still single. You could tell her (Ces' mom) that it's still not too late to start over, sweetie Malus : Yes mother, I heard you the first thousand times

-Now presenting : the first course

Evelin : Look at this big girl sitting at the grown-up table! >:D

*awkward silence*

Evie : I'm too old (teenager) to be sitting at this stupid kids' table! Amanda : It's not stupid! You can eat all the fruit you want! :D And it's all fresh!

Evie : *gasp* It's starting to happen! Amanda : What starting to happen? Evie : Grown-up stuff!

*just adults arguing over irrelevant stuff Ig lol*

Malus, whispering : Sis, do something! -Oh, right, of course

-Ladies! There's no need to fight over such miniscule matters! We're all royalty as you know, and there is a way we can settle this petty dispute like the civilized we are. With... FLAGS!

Everyone else except M : FLAGS! Malus : Oh dear Lord....

*Evie finishes explaining the basics to Amanda* Amanda : Ooh..... Evie : I am so ready for this-! Malus : Absolutely not Evie : What?! Malus : We can play something else after all of this, but you are not going to play flags Evie : Why not? You played flags when you were my age...! Malus : I did a lot of things at your age that I won't allow you to do Evie : >:( Malus : *sigh* I know it's boring to be the oldest at the kids' table, but you are not ready to be the youngest at the adults' table. Now go and help you little cousins cut their fruit

Amanda : So uh, we obeying? Evie : Oh no.... I'll show her that I'm old enough for this!

*epic time skip*

*Also Malus being good at sword fighting if you want*

Evie : Mom...? Malus : Are you alright? Evie : Damn mom, those are some pretty good moves with your big ol' sword and stuff Malus : Eve, you won't believe what just happened : I just met your twin sister! She was made out of grapes(?) Evie : ... Malus : I don't even remember giving birth to her. Sis, did I ever give birth to a grape baby? -No, I only remember you having one child, Mal. Malus : Thank you sis- -Her name is Evie :) <- She's got a concussion Malus : Alright, why don't you just lay back down...

aawww this is all super cute!!!! didnt expect it to be lil quotes but it's cute!! :DDD

evie wanting to be a grown up so bad kinda fits her character!!! :DDDD

#i do have to be a bit nitpicky in tags but thats bc im weird xdddd #bc there are a few inaccuracies i wanna fix rq #1) amanda is named tiffany bc i made her before amanda became a character #so i'd prefer if you used that name to refer to her. esp since she's techniclly my oc #2) yonder is uh. kinda dead DCVFBGHNJM #i dont think i ever talked abt that tho so no worries on that. very funny line tho xdddd #yeah i definitely didnt talk abt that OOPS #but i think i came up w that while on my break #again no worries!! this is overall very cute and i really appreciate this a lot!!!! #evie and tiffany having a previous friendship is definitely something i'll look into >:0 #malus being good at sword fighting is interesting too! #station interviews #mandela catalogue #for me #tmc fairy tale au #idk why i didnt put these tags first xddd sry qwq #not tagging characters bc i dont wanna go over the tag limit #but again thank you so much!!!! its super cute and i will cherish this forever and ever <33333 #i'll clear stuff up in my fairu tale au masterpost i wanna remake so no worries abt that!!! #i cant stress enough how much i really love this and appreciate it so much <33333 #save #<- WHY DIDNT I PUT THIS HERE FIRST AAARRGGHHHH

[an-t-hiho]

I redrew an old oc a while ago but I didn't try to post it

anygays so here he is :D

(little bit of an expression practice too lol–)

#oc #idk tbh #uh #art? #idk #uhhh y a y content #aha #yeah #anyway just gonna try to break myself out of this artblock rq

[astrxealis]

bg3 is too fun. too fun.

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚ #hii :3 i've gotten a lot better w my fear of the dark in bg3 LMFAO i'm in the shadow-cursed lands and just finished the bit where you can #free the pixie and get immunity to the curse hooray <3 bg3 is so fun oh my god the gameplay the characters the everything #it breaks my heart tho KDBWKFB I'VE BEEN ROMANCING BOTH ASTARION & KARLACH BUT SINCE... YK... karlach's romance finally progresses more #uh. i had to. break up w her for astarion. aha. I MEAN I COULD HAVE... IDK. how to explain. yeah. #wyll's dance scene makes me Head In Hands oh god i love all the origin characters sooo much #gave shadowheart night orchids too! lae'zel is pretty absent rn and you have gale on his suicide mission but uh. yeah. cool (???) #prolly not gna progress more w shadow-cursed lands yet ... kinda wna do the githyanki creche stuff first :P kaboom #anyway astarion is so. so. he is everything. #i've started a durge run too and am a few hours in :] going to romance astarion with my draconic ancestry sorcerer half-elf who is another #flavor of twink LMFAO <3 raghhh cannot wait to progress more and more in bg3 #scared for the endings tho tbh. i've heard online and from others that uh... they leave things to be desired. #really amazing and fun game so far tho :3 !! gameplay is sooo fun i love trying to be strategic and then i love. the game. yes #^_^ going to write more and do other stuff more and get to what i need to do and want to do tho. oh gods. by today i swear.

[mejomonster]

Huai dao chapter 25: so im only in the beginning portion. But id say a big difference between huai dao and modu is that in huai dao police (at least so far) have been portrayed only positively. Modu, while having luo wenzhous team be u know about as glorified in wanting to be good/do right by people as most of these types of main characters in murder mystery novels... theres also a much larger focus on corruption. Modu spends a lot of time on corrupt police working with their team, undermining their efforts to do good, their boss and bosses above that being corrupt, their fellow employees killing innocent people and people who do commit crimes being in danger they do Not deserve. How the poor, immigrants, drug users, are used by the police as scapegoats and their rights are not respected, the tragedy that is. And then outside the police, how corruption runs through corporations, through the rich, through politicans, through authority figures in groups who give them the kind of power able to be abused. Modu still ultimately has police as its heroes, like huai dao (and similar novels). But i think it does aim to do a more nuanced evaluation of what is justice, what do individuals have to do and consider daily to contribute to helping individuals/society, what corruption exists and its various forms of structural power that harm people. Huai dao maybe... maybe is trying, so far, to look into human nature a bit (im only 1/4 through tho). Modu was a lot more certain of what about human nature it wanted to touch - what corruption exists, who does it hurt, how do you help people in this world that has corruption in the justice system and in power, how many kinds of people are victims to it, how far does it reach. Modus even a bit conservative in looking at this (as i imagine the plot couldve spiraled out to encompass the whole country or whole World) since it tries to contain this examination to 1 fictional city, using the city as a stand in for the bigger world.

#lb #huai dao #modu #idk if this makes sense #like? yeah modu is copganda as much as SCI or Breaking Through the Clouds or Under the Skin or #most any story with cop leads. #but i would say compared to huai dao (which reads as Cops Always Good Protect Us) #modu instead makes a point that Plenty of cops might kill an innocent person. set them up. use them. deny their rights. #contribute to systematic corruption and harm of people #in modu theres no organization thats All Good Will Protect People #and a big arc for luo wenzhou is facing he is in a corrupt system and while he tries to Help #his own boss and his own organization does harm and hes stuck in that as a part of it #which is a bit less of a Perfect police take. u feel. #also i think thats why like. modu/justice in the dark maybe faced more censorship question issues #it does paint cops rich and government as corruptible and having systematic corruption #which uh. not like the ideal theyd generally like shows to go for

[buttertable]

What better way to break a mortals mind and make them your slave than to traumatize them with nightmares every single night?

#bill cipher #billdip #hm yeah very good break dippys mind and make him yours!! #duuude stockhol syndrome in ur dreams lol #when u got stockholm syndrome where youd rather be asleep than awake #but wait dat not make sense why would u wabna go to sleep to have more nightmares #uh uh cuz trauma idk

[hasarjunadoneanythingwrong]

So to summarize:

"If Azazoth wakes up the universe ends" and "Shiva could Dr Manhattan anyone and anything out of existence by looking at them"

are mythologies that can and should co-exist, and picking just one is yet another example of FGO finding the one wrong answer and going with that.

they kept the shiva dr manhattaning ppl out of existence thing but ONLY for kama and ONLY to make shiva look like a colossal dick as well. like lets be real here if you were actively grieving your dead wife (who killed herself protecting your honor against her father no less), had made it explicitly clear you weren't ready/in the mood to remarry even if it was to her reincarnation, and some guy tried to love arrow you to get you to fall for said reincarnation anyway you might lose your temper! and he DID bring kama back to life as anaga as an apology in the actual myth, they just made it happen by accident in fate bc...idk screw the idea of a god trying to make up for hurting someone else i guess? this is off topic tho ghkldsf

like ideally if you wanted to make every religion canon AND absolutely had to bring powerscaling into it youd probably have it be something like current faith of believers+overall cultural impact+age of actual religion/myth/whathaveyou so you COULD give cthulu mythos some weight when up against like...idk the greek pantheon as it DID have a marked effect on specific styles of horror (ie it invented a new one) and is sort of known by most people in a pop culture kind of way (in that it is more relevant to the current cultural zietgiest than greek mythology. this is a bad example bc greek mythology is also still wildly popular just as the stories but ykwim). that being said no one really actually worships them, so actually having them square off against gods is...silly for lack of a better word?

and to use my previous example, if you wanted a like cthulu vs zeus showdown using the parameters i mentioned while its true that lovecraft mythos is much more well known/current to today and operates on a much larger cosmice scale, greek mythology and the culture it created HEAVILY influenced other mediterannean cultures which in turn heavily influenced a whole bunch of other cultures and that would need to be taken into account even if zeus is 'only' a thunder god. (ignoring that he was also actually worshiped, and for a far greater period of time than any lovecraft god)

so like, keeping all of the cosmic scale of the lovecraft gods but going 'uh well actually none of the other gods are like how you heard they were' is annoyingly inconsistent. even with whatever excuses they have re: sefar or whatever its just...bad storytelling. why is this one made up pantheon the only one exempt from their own rules, and why is it the one that actively seems to go against the franchise's general themes of the human spirit? it just BOTHERS me lol like picking and choosing when to follow or break their rules isnt at all new to fate but i think the fact that out of all the god pantheons they couldve left unaltered they chose the one invented by lovecraft touched a nerve in me.

this is all a very long way of saying that if azazoth DID exist and DID have all those powers it wouldnt even matter if he woke up bc the minute he even thought about stirring all the other equally omnipotent omniscient all-powerful gods from across cultures would simultaneously flip him off so hard hed cry

#every god every invented vs a single lovecraft god: #fate wants us to think the tentacle binch would win but. come on. COME ON #im not even religious!!! theyve got me defending religion now!!! #but seriously so many stories are like 'these gods are super powerful and all knowing but they still in their own way care about us so #'we have to try and do our best to follow these rules' #whether its avatars or prophets or the pope or what have you #those 'all knowing' gods DO care enough about the 'insignificant' specks enough to try and help them in various ways even if it isnt direct #and yeah religion is often used to oppress but idk its kind of annoying that they dont ever acknowledge how it can also help ppl #(or how oppression is not just created and enforced through religion) #like cmon guys context #its like 'looking at all these stories where the gods/god loves humanity and wants to help them become better beings' #'shoves them to the side and picks the horror one where even seeing them breaks a person's mind' #krishna showed juna his true form and juna was like mindblown a bit and had to forget but he didnt go INSANE like. #maybe hes just built different >_> #though uh. wouldnt say that a hindu god's true form is equivalent to a lovecraft one #and yeah theres ones where the true form will kill the human but they tend to try not to do that? if it happens they legit show remorse #my asks #normal tag night :)

[shopcat]

my thing is that i like nancy i think her grief is compelling and the fact that she’s a teenage girl in a small town who has had to be responsible for so much shit is a lot to deal with. like her parents are pretty checked out when her best friend went missing nobody listened to her and then when she found out she died she had to hide the fact that she knew she has spent the past 3 years feeling like it’s her fault she’s dead. and she’s so career oriented and she doesn’t want to turn into her parents and i think that she like needs to feel in control of everything all the time or things will get fucked. but then they make her say that even while she was with steve she was sort of waiting around for jonathan or be an asshole to robin for no reason and never apologize when she hurts people like i don’t think she’s a villain i think she’s just got flaws when it comes to relationships bc she doesn’t have very good examples of them but when you make a character who’s flawed never own up to her mistakes it just gets frustrating to watch. which is i think why next season we need less nancy relationship drama and more her dealing with her trauma and healing and also maybe some wheeler sibling moments bc they never talk to each other in canon. also stop making steve pine over her bc they literally have opposing ideas of what they want from life we have known this since s1 he needs to get a boyfriend!! that’s all sorry it was a lot thank u peace and love on planet earth

i agree with all as well <3 i think it's good to like complex characters with flaws instead of using those flaws as a way to pin them up and i know this all always snowballs cuz i bring up steve but i still find it weird how people can take the care and nuance to approach every single action he does with a kindness because we like him but characters u don't like (who aren't like actually horrible cunts like b*lly) don't deserve the same care and like i'm NOT saying everyone write dissertations OR bring up how different it is because i know i know but the core of it remains still from my pov tbh!!! but honestly i just prefer to not talk about nancy at all beyond everything that's already been said LOL like i just don't really care not that i mind but i wouldn't bring it up myself or anything. i don't despise her i hate her around steve but i am looking forward to seeing her in st5 and where her character goes <3

#asks #also i do like ronans bc of how hand in hand these conversations seem to go 🤔 #i think it's interesting how there seems to be this entire complex war and it's also sort of funny how some people act like they're like #not... a popular ship? as if it's not the most popular f/f couple in this entire fanbase but i digress #sorry for saying i digress #BUT ANYWAY!!!! #i think in order to have ronans b good for me there needs to be that complexity of steve being worried/wary not bc of her breaking his #hesrt but how she did it but i also think it's not very fair to apply uncomplex uh relationships? on them bc like yeah they're characters #but they're also people. and it's also a different story if u think steve does have any lingering feeling for her which i think he did obv #and i know people like to speedrun him getting over it which i get but IDK IDK #also i think while that all matters it's also fine to have fun uncomplex content idrc but i guess i'm not invested #sts

[bloggirl8842]

My psych says I don’t like my mom or my ex because they make me vulnerable but I think it’s because they are/were both serial boundary violators. Well serial boundary violators sounds serious but I mean they are just good kind people who would not leave me alone when i ask(ed)

#i mean so am i so i dont exactly blame them but like. my mom doesnt knock used to hold me down and epilate my body doesnt take no for an #answer ever on anything unless youre MEAN to her and i dont mean anything serious i mean she asked me to go to the store with her to pick #out paint for her walls i said no she asked again i said no she asked again i said no so she went on her own and facetimed me so id help her #pick. my ex had a similar thing where if i was like hey lets not talk tomorrow im burnt out hed be like okay and then the next day early #morning he’d send a good morning text and then several more throughout the day and then we’d call at the end of the night #people do who not let you fucking breathe. i hate it. if i saw my mom less often id probably like her but her so much as sitting next to me #on the couch will have me tense and pissed. she also takes glee in hating things i like and its not a conscious or serious thing but its #really weird. ive done the same for her since i was little i dont know who did it first. like ok we’re moving our new place had wallpaper in #my room i wanted to keep it she wanted to remove it she agreed to keep it and then made plans to remove it bc she was going to get rid of it #at some point later on anyway for the house’s value or something. they removed it recently and she showed me a vid of the place and when she #gets to my room shes like hehehe its goneee like girl what the fuck is going on with you. she wouldnt let me change the decoration of my #room as a child it had to be the way she liked it. even my body had to be the way she liked it dude the epilation thing shed laugh as i #cried (in a shirt and underwear man) bc i was finally hairless. my ex was nowhere near that bad but again ZERO breathing room and whenever #id try to take some hed be like ‘’i just worry that if you take this space you’ll come back and break up with me’’ uh. yeah with that #attitude the breakup’s coming either way. he’s a good guy though just 24 and a man (both sad afflictions) he’ll shape up. or not. idk im no #t invested #he did listen to a lot of what i said just not the basic things of ‘’leave me the fuck alone sometimes’m #im annoyed that my therapist framed this as a me issue but shes right when it comes to me having trouble w vulnerability and i should just #clarify my pov here so she can change her assessment #my ex leaves me alone now. he does a great job at it i thiiink hes moved on which im happy about #i dont know if id ever want to be friends again though idk if either of us can do that #i cant. rn #i understand why he wanted so much from me though. i get it