#but i needed to get them out of my brain

[igottayellsomewhere]

From Episode 5

"sometimes when I try to look ahead, all I see is back"

back where sanji

like, you could think about this line on a surface-ish level and say back to germa and all that angst ect, sure, but then what is back? what could there possibly be to go back to that he'd want to go to?? and that begs the question, what is forward?

so, at this point in opla they show that he's getting increasingly frustrated with zeff and that is the conflict thats set up to be a push forward, but it also really feels like the characters could have been at this crossroads before. Like, this is a repeating pattern but it always ends the same, sanji is frustrated then zeff let's him back into the kitchen then creativity and the need to be Free strikes and theyre at it again. And because sanji has decided to dedicate himself to zeff and repaying a kindness he could never imagine *there's nothing to look back or forward to*. This is the best scenario. He needs to fulfill zeffs dream before he can think about his own and There's No Other Option. So what is back?

Back is repaying zeff. A debt he can *never* repay

And though they do share the same dream and sanji still wants, yearns, for the All Blue, he can never give himself permission to do so. So forward is Here, at the Baratie, and he daren't dream because it's impossible to wrap his head around why zeff would do anything for a person like sanji, scratch that *just* sanji.

And then you gotta take into account that zeff is purposely squashing sanjis potential at the Baratie cause zeff wants sanji to realize that that's Not the path for sanji. If zeff gave sanji the responsibility he craves that would be like zeff putting the final blow on both their dreams. Zeff is begging sanji to want more but for sanji thats unfathomable; again, This is the Best Case Scenario and he can't bring himself to believe there's more.

So thinking forward or backward is just a moot point, which is why it's so jarring for Luffy to come in and say both that he doesn't do regrets or 'complicated' cause that's what sanji's dream is. When presented with the idea that it could be so simple, when Luffy says join us, there's a long pause. The idea has sprouted but the roots must be crushed. Like always.

I guess here would be a good time to compare the live action and the anime, like, zoro's dream having a big part in the anime/manga, ect. It's true that the only interaction opla zoro had with opla sanji before joining the crew officially was the dinner scene but I don't think the influence of zoros dream on sanji is as lost as some might say.

Opla sanji sees the aftermath of The Fight clearly, sees how many lengths Zoro would go to. He sees Luffy defend Zoro's dream vehemently, when Nami asks why Luffy didn't stop Zoro. In this moment it's reiterated that a person's dreams are Important and that Zoro was *right* to go after them, was *right* to be selfish and try to take something he wanted. Nami's was the dialogue sanji has been telling himself all his life, keep those you care for safe no matter what, no matter if it hurts to do it. Luffy's was a dialogue of I will not keep people from doing what they want, no matter what. No matter how much is "owed" to someone, a dream is Worthy, even if it makes those you're close to disappointed and sad. Which. Is one of many things sanji has been trying desperately to avoid. There's the tiniest crack of light trying to shine through, that maybe one can follow their dreams and have people care about you.

If this moment between the crew had not happened I'm not sure opla sanji would have joined the straw hats.

In this moment, sanji sees someone (zoro) who is willing to go forward, no matter what, and witnessing there are still people that care for that person even in that decision (Luffy, Nami, Ussop). The last time sanji Left there was a severance and no one to help him. He was on his own. Mustering up that courage Again would be... well, it'd be impossibly difficult. Seeing that there were people *for* the fool who followed their dreams was just as important as seeing someone follow their dreams, but Zoro needed to have a dream in the first place. Not one that could be squashed down, but one he was willing to and nearly died for. Someone could do anything for a dream and still be, well, worthy.

So he sees this crew, sees a chance, sees a worldview he's never dared hope for. And it's kind of the perfect opportunity but he darent hope quite yet. All he can do for now is feed and take care of these incredibly kind people and appreciate who they are while theyre here. So he does.

And then the Fishman show up. Sanji is Needed and he Can't abandon his home he needs to be there, end of story. Then Luffy offers to help and the world shifts. Again, sanji is facing a kindness he can't fathom deserving and the guy offers it enthusiastically, without hesitation. Sanji allows this kindness cause maybe its a way to be even, to allow someone to be kind is a kindness kinda thing. But either way he's gotta Go so let's not think on this too much and help zeff.

In the restaurant, sanji keeps his promise. He fights for zeff without hesitation. But then he gets thrown into a table (ouch) and can barely move. What now??? It's probably Panic City but then Luffy is there. Luffy is *defending zeff's dream*. Sanji takes a moment to recover and then we don't see him until he dives into the water after Luffy. But can you imagine????

This random boy is going head to head for zeff's dream. The thing Sanji *has* to protect. The other two fishmen are standing watch at the baratie entrance but as soon as they're gone sanjis out there, and what is out there? This random boy getting thrown to his death. And this random boy has a dream. And if he can save this random boy's dream, maybe sanji can have a dream too. But not now, later. Now we gotta help zeff rebuild.

And so sanji faces a final Forward. Zeff can see how much sanji cares and knows he has to break this boy's heart. There's no other way. We don't explicitly see zeff hearing that luffy offered sanji a place on his crew but a bit ago luffy got right in zeffs face and defended sanji, told him outright sanji is the type of person zeff hoped he would be. If this is gonna be the final push zeff can push him to somewhere he knows sanji will be valued. So he does, in the only way he knows sanji can accept.

This makes their final farewell even more heartbreaking. We can see there's a moment where both parties consider not saying anything. Theres Too Much but also Not Enough. And then they do, they say "take care", sanji says thank you, "thank you for putting up with my shit" and "I owe you my life". There's a thank you for the Past and a thank you for the Forward. Thank you for what is about to be.

"sometimes when I try to look ahead, all I see is back"

And now there's Both. A past to fondly remember and grow from and a future to look forward to.

back where sanji? What is back now?? Forward. Ahead. Back to a life of adventure on his terms.

#opla #opla sanji #opla meta #sanji #i have no doubt these thoughts have been voiced before #but i needed to get them out of my brain #more will come soon im quite sure #anyway #opla has me in a vice grip #one piece #one piece live action

[capricores]

if you have strong mutable (gemini, sagittarius, pisces, virgo) placements then you NEED to write things down if you don't already. all those thoughts that constantly swirl in your head: the frequent tasks, goals, feelings, aspirations, opinions, etc - WRITE THEM DOWN. this is not only therapeutic & stress-relieving for you but almost necessary, or you're going to burn out and overload your own mind constantly.

when you bottle, or when you let plans, goals, dreams, to-do lists, projects, etc live solely in your head - you'll notice you can't sleep as well, it's harder to rest, your memory gets more foggy than usual, you feel burnt out and unable to connect, etc. specifically:

write down your feelings. this will be your ultimate (free) therapy. start to journal, write a diary. make a private twitter/tumblr where you spill your feelings, frustrations, thoughts. you will feel an immense sense of relief by writing or typing your feelings out - even if no one is reading it but you. mutable moons especially. our feelings tend to change rapidly, but it doesn't make them less valid. don't bottle out of the fear your feelings will change/you'll just "get over it"!! write it down and let it out!!

write! to-do! lists!!!!! these don't have to be for important things. you want to learn digital art? you want to study coding? you want to learn french? you want to re-decorate? you probably have a billion things you want to do, and then you get overwhelmed by the options, and do nothing. write down all the things you want to do. make a to-do list for these things. get them out of your head and somewhere permanent/physical. looking at the options in front of you will feel much easier.

make excel project trackers (you can even make these for to-do list items/goals/etc)! mutable placements have a tendency to start a lot of projects or tasks, and never finish any of them. make a simple tracker for all the projects you start. you won't forget what you're working on, and you'll be less overwhelmed trying to remember what you have going on (example of the one i always use pictured below)

talking out your thoughts and feelings is also very cathartic. make fake (or real, i support u!) youtube vlogs where you spill your feelings and talk about your plans, your day, what you have to do, etc. talk to someone you love and trust, vent to them about how things are; or about what you're getting up to. i find writing has an edge, because you can go back to it for reference (mutables tend to forget things easily) - but as long as you're getting the swirl of your mind somewhere outside of your head, you'll feel so, so much less stressed.

mutable dominants tend to constantly live in go-mode, we're restless and always doing something. we feel uncomfortable and sometimes guilty about staying still. our minds don't ever shut off. it's very important for mutable placements to learn how to rest, be present in the moment, and learn grounding. this can be done in many ways, but i've found personally that writing works best for me. other helpful practices can be: talk therapy, acceptance theory, yoga, meditation, hiking, camping, etc.

i also want to remind mutable signs: we change a lot. we have a lot of ideas. there's so much we want to do. we often feel like we have no path, no big goal; we can struggle with purpose as we don't often aspire for permanent things or "one big goal". this is NOT bad. there is nothing wrong with changing your feelings, your mind, your goals, your life path. you CAN do all the things you want to do! you have your entire life ahead of you! yes, you can learn all those languages. yes, you can have three different careers in your life. yes yes yes! don't listen to negativity from others. don't beat yourself up for not having one big goal like some people around you might. cherish and embrace all the things you want to achieve and complete (both big and small). learn to follow-through with and finish the things that matter to you (writing things down will really help with this, make action plans/steps - break everything down into smaller pieces). take the time to slow down and enjoy the moments as they come. you got this!

#like PLSSSS it is so important you all NEED to write/type your thoughts and feelings #talking abt them will make u feel amazing but writing them out will get them out of your brain #astrology #mutable #luna.txt #i love u mutables <3 #this post was so scattered and random and all over the place in true mutable fashion #but im not editing it because this is for the mutables anyway and yall will get my scattered-ness #mine

[ipostmysimpingstuffanonymously]

Part 2. This time its the Tokyo Five (As I named them) Headcanons in the reblog tags appreciated

#haibara is baby i love him so much omg #also hes a light weight #two beers and he's down #remember the headcanon i had about gojo not beeing able to drink alcohol? #bottom right is what happens if he decides to drink #suguru with the bass is SO HOT OMG #and shopping cart stealing is mandatori for the sashisu trio #kidnapping haibara is a plus #also shoko or geto just casually pulling a pack of cigarettes out of their pocket and the condom coming with #yeah thats canon #the satosho hug makes my knees weak #and the sashisu kisses I CANNOT GET ENOUGH #more artists need to draw them kissing each other #pls i just wanna share my brainrot #nanami eating bread cuz its his fav food! #so many more headcanons feel free to dm me if you wanna hear more about my rotted brain farts #sashisu #satosho #satosho weekend #satoshoko #sugusho #satosugu #stsg #shoko ieiri #satoru gojo #geto suguru #haibara yu #nanami kento #jjk #jujutsu kaisen

[heartorbit]

just how can i protect your smile?

#you guys like yaoi? can i get you some yaoi #pjsk #prsk #project sekai #proseka #tsukasa tenma #rui kamishiro #ruikasa #AUUUUUGH. #this is what finally makes me actually draw riks. vocaloid autism #putting the link in the caption because NOBODY FUCKIGN TLAKS ABOUT SCISSORHANDS EVER WHERES THE HYPE I NEED HER. SONG OF THE DECADE(2009) #this song makes me incredibly normal. my bad. i saw the miume choreography when i was like 11 and my brain shifted #i wanted their outfits to look like mikus in the mv so bad. Fuck my life for that btw stupid fuckign frill trim. why did she have to slay #tried to think of smth other than butterflies for kasa but i have no brain and tbh i hope his life is miserable so its fine #me posting this only to tmblr and not twt because i fucking hate twt #im drawing more song covers that live in my mind palace so i'll pist them there all together. and maybe here all together. who give a shit. #emnn skeleton orchestra next and it will fix me #Good lord. sorry. Im so caught up posting this for no reason. Get me out of here #im supposed to have a lecture in 3 hours but post covid symptoms say otherwise. im so fucked #i have a cyberpunk dead boy wip with them but idk i dont like posting wips on here its like an archive. n i want to actually finish it #but dear lord rendering it with their stupid outfits. clutches my chest falls to the floor. AUUUUGH #wxs killing me killing me taking damage augh auugh aughg

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

At rest, your lungs wish to deflate, and your ribcage expands outwards.

#better drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #yiling laozu #Happy Friday the 13th! #This is scientific fact btw! #Ventilation operates through a series of active and passive forces #The active forces being muscular contraction with inhalation and exhalation having their own set of muscles. #but the interesting part is the passive forces at work: #The lungs have a certain level of elasticity to them - meaning the more they expand the more the those elastic forces are functioning- #-to try and return the system to rest (exhalation passive forces). Your diaphragm is the main force - pushing against the lungs at rest. #Your ribcage on the other hand is under a state of being pulled outwards. It *wants* to be as open as possible. #These to contradicting forces create a constant push and pull which assists in the ebb and flow of air. Most significantly with exhalation. #Now that being said - the primary action of inhalation ventilation is through control centers in your brainstem. #If you lose connection to that due to trauma you're going to need ventilation assistance. #Small note: Respiration is the cellular event of chemical exchange in the alveoli. Ventilation is airflow and pressure. #They are both important but also very different things. Sadly used interchangeably. #My anatomy nerd brain is screaming over the inaccurate ribcage...but its...recognizable. I will get it right one day. #Okay nerd rant over (I cut out a lot of stuff about pressure gradients. They are cool. To me.) #This is a redraw of an mspaint doodle I made back in april. I yearn to make the Yiling Laozu eerie as he deserves #Tear that bitch (affectionate) apart! #Been playing around with hatching for a while and its amazing how many styles there are! Not sure I'll stick with this one (but it was fun)

[fure-dcmk]

movie 27 delusion

#dcmk fanart #dcmk #detective conan #kuroba kaito #hattori heiji #kazuha tooyama #my art #i need to get them out the stupid romcom punchline keep spinning in my brain #does this counts as my bingo card prediction for next year

[furiosophie]

He looks back down at the baby – Andy – with her lick of dark hair and her splotchy pink skin. Even though she can’t be more than a month old, probably not even, the resemblance to her father – to Hob’s friend – is already uncanny. She looks imperious, a little disapproving, like she’ll nap in his arms if she has to since she doesn’t want to be rude, but privately she thinks the conditions aren’t quite befitting an infant of her station.

Hob loves her instantly, instinctively, in a way that he thinks is going to be nearly impossible to get over.

real people by spqr (@andthepeople)

#dreamling #dream x hob #hob gadling #dream of the endless #PLS GO READ THIS FIC IT IS SO GOOD #it made me cry on the plane #honestly just the ultimate comfort fic #couldn't get the image of them carrying Andy around in that baby björn out of my head #i know they would prob not have gone for a pink one but I needed a color contrast so uh #just pretend they got it as a hand me down #or simply that hob thought it would be funny to break up dreams monochrome fit #anyway the sandman brain rot continues #soph arts

[larabar]

prime on the brain ,,

#AAAGH EXPLODING #so much. so so much stuff in my brain rn #and no way to get it out💥 #i might color some of these but i just need to get them over here first skfnj #sth #doodles #sonic prime #sonic prime spoilers

[ttaibhse]

the way lalo doesnt immediately assume nacho set the fire in the kitchen is kind of craaazy like. brother he was literally just in there seconds ago and he comes out looking like the single shiftiest motherfucker on earth and lalo is so enchanted by his big beautiful sad brown eyes it doesn’t even cross his mind it was him till way later. halfway to being a salamanca. bro. you wanna fuck him so bad it not only makes you look stupid it gets you and your whole family killed

#bcs #i need to make these posts to get them out of my brain sorry #lacho

[funneylizzie]

They r the only thing in my mind atm

#my brain needs 2 be studied or something like GET THEM OUT I have stuff to do #rottmnt #art tag #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #Future Leo #fleo #casey jones jr #casey jones

[mewkwota]

I Know What You Are... You Are Mega Man!

The differences between each Mega is something I love and appreciate, plus it's also fun to compare them side-by-side for it.

I think it's really amusing how they start with robots that slowly reach near-human traits, and then there's a straight-up human. Albeit, he is merged with a non-human being.

And then there's Volnutt. I know he could probably be narrowed down to an "artificial human", but I like the idea of tying him to his celestial origins as Trigger that are still half a mystery.

Such is my running-joke with him. He is just... Volnutt (currently).

#also I needed these because I wanted to update my refs for The Bois (it's been 7981374102 years) #like a lot of them got adjustments to their color palettes ^^ #even though I can't color as much because I get so dizzy now #I still want them for later #and I haven't colored in forever I'm just glad it turned out nice #anywho~ #I've seen how some fans have depicted designs for trigger and they seem so cool! #I'd love to give it a go too but I worry my peanut brain on legends will cause me to get schooled again #I never know nothing about you boy apparently I'm very sorry #so alone in the dark I will remain (he is a mystery :D ) #Mew's Art #megaman #rockman #megaman x #rockman x #megaman exe #megaman.exe #rockman exe #hub hikari #saito hikari #star force megaman #ryuusei no rockman #geo stelar #subaru hoshikawa #omega-xis #warrock #rock volnutt #*I am crushed by the giant name tags once again*

[factorialsotherfandoms]

"Do you think Philza's okay?"

Fit rolls over to look at Pac, his roommate staring up at the ceiling. He reaches over, cautiously offering his hand. Pac, of course, takes it just as hesitantly.

"Cell's back, maybe after you, and you're worried about Phil?" Okay, so Fit is worried too, but his point is well made. Pac had only told him some of the situation, in whispered tones and terrified whimpers a few hours ago, and he was worrying about someone who was at least safe?

Pac turns his head, and looks Fit dead in the eye. "You're with me. I know you won't let anyone hurt me. But who's with him?"

"He's safe enough," Fit says. "Physically at least."

"He just didn't seem, ah," Pac struggles with his words for a moment. "Well?"

"It's not really my place to say," he replies. "But he's Philza. He'll be fine."

"Will he?" Pac asks, fretting already. "If the Federation is inside his head, making him see things..."

It's a worry Fit has too, one he really doesn't want to think about. He wants to pretend that his old friend is fine, that going and murdering blazes and magma cubes will have fixed everything. He needs to believe it, because the alternative... The alternative is there's nothing he can do.

"Do you really believe him?" Pac asks. "That there was a book there."

"Yes."

"Why?"

Fit sighs, and sits up. He turns on the lamp and stretches, looking around his room of missing texture flooring and ugly walls - the safest place he could think to bring Pac when he heard the news.

"It's not the first time," Fit says. "Phil... He swears it was a dream, that he was just sleeping. He wasn't. Tubbo and me? We checked every corner of his house. He wasn't there. Then he takes us to where he thought he was taken and he swears there's nothing weird about it? But it's full of parrots - they shouldn't have spawned there. Tubbo even found an avocado sapling."

"Philza has a lot of avocados," Pac agrees. "You think the Federation took him?"

"I'm not sure, it's not their usual behaviour," Fit frowns. "But I don't know who else it would be?"

"The codes?"

"Maybe." Fit cracks his head to the side. "But I know Phil. Whatever he saw? It terrified him. And anything that scares Philza Minecraft is nothing you ever want to see."

"Should we ask him if we can visit?" Pac has a calculating look on his face. "I can cry scared all over again, I just need to remember why. And his bunker is very safe. They might look for me in your house, but they'd never think of his."

"Why? Is my company not good enough for you?" Fit is mostly teasing.

Mostly.

"No! No, no, no," Pac waves his hands in a desperate attempt to be understood. "I just... I'm worried, you know?"

"Yeah..." Fit sighs. "Yeah, I'm worried too... I'll ask him."

Pac nods, and Fit types.

You whisper to Ph1LzA: Can I bring Pac over? We might need to stay the night.

Ph1LzA whispers to you: sure mate

Ph1LzA whispers to you: is everything okay?

You whisper to Ph1LzA: We'll explain when we get there

That's the end of that; Fit shows his communicator to Pac, who agrees.

"I'm not really faking the tears," Pac promises, already tearing up. "I just don't think about it, and then it isn't real."

Pac's not the only one acting like that, Fit presumes; Philza's constant denials even with evidence in front of him... Whatever the fuck happened in that forest, it's nothing good. Something so terrible believing his memory is at fault is somehow better.

"To Phil and Missa," Fit reminds Pac, not really needing it.

They warp together, and at the same time.

---

Philza is waiting at the top of the hatch when the pair arrive. To most people he would look entirely normal, but Fit can see the way his eyes flitter as he waves. Pac waves back, while Fit gives his traditional "oi!!!"

Philza laughs, and leads them down into the basement.

"What's up?" he asks the two of them. "Need more toast or something? I thought you were both asleep."

"No, um," Fit looks to Pac, realising they didn't quite work out what to say.

"Bagi told me more about the murders," is what Pac says, his voice dropping very quiet as he does. "She thinks... We think someone from my past is on the island."

"Shit," Philza closes his eyes for a moment. "How bad is it?"

"Last time I saw him," Pac's pace picks up; Fit squeezes his shoulder as he sees panic come in. "Last time... He nearly killed me. And the messages..." Pac grabs the hand on his shoulder and squeezes it back. "Some of them might be addressed to me."

Philza doesn't ask questions, he just glances around his children's bedroom, then looks at Fit. Fit meets his eyes.

Philza sighs, and caves.

"Alright," he says. "Do you want to sleep in Chayanne's room? I can adjust the door to just the three of us, Missa, and my eggs for now."

Fit knows it isn't for Pac's sake that Philza is changing the doors, he knows it for sure.

They get their beds set up, tucked behind the chests where a casual observer cannot see. Philza doesn't have a bed, but Fit makes them for him and Pac, placing them tucked away.

"Would you stay with us?" Fit asks, before his old friend can slip away.

Philza looks genuinely surprised by the request, "why, mate? I'll just be in the eggs' room."

"Safety in numbers, right?" Pac asks, glancing between the two. "I would... Feel safer if you were here too."

Fit knows its a manipulation tactic to convince Philza to stay, to make sure the old crow is not alone. It still rings so very true - and so very against everything ingrained within Fit's soul.

It's fine. For a few nights he can manage it, if its what his two closest friends need.

"Alright," Philza hesitates, but comes over and sits on the edge of Pac's bed. He takes off his backpack, and leans his scythe just in reach. Pac and Fit take the opportunity to remove their prosthetics, hastily reattached to travel over here, and stretch.

When Philza stands again, both of them can see how unstable he looks.

"Let's push our beds together," Fit says. "If we put Pac between us, there isn't an angle they can get him from."

Philza looks at Fit, and knows exactly what he's doing. Still, Philza crafts up a third bed, and squishes it between the two.

He nearly falls as he walks around to do it; Fit catches him, helps him steady, but is brushed off before he can say a word.

"Alright," Philza says. "Pac in the middle then. You won't get too warm, will you?"

"I'm Brazilian," Pac says. "It's always too cold here now Mike is gone."

They both see how heavily Philza drops to the bed, curling himself back to Pac and defensively ready. Fit, on his side, curls close to Pac - his one arm over him.

It's not really a surprise how quickly Pac falls asleep, with the sheer trauma and strain of the day on his back. He quickly falls into dreams, and Fit can only hope they are kind.

"Phil," he asks, once he knows Pac is asleep. "Won't you sleep?"

"You needed a guard," Philza says.

"You know we don't. You and I? We'll wake if anything so much as tests the hatch."

It's true, and they both know it.

Philza, however, doesn't speak.

At least, not for a long time; Fit considers conversation a lost cause and is about to give up and call this good enough when he hears Philza again, voice broken just like it was in the garden.

"If I sleep, will I wake?" is what Philza asks, whispered almost silently. "How will I know when the world is real again? What will I see this time?"

"I'll make sure you wake up," Fit promises, because he can. "And I'll do something to make you absolutely certain its really me."

"Promise?"

Philza sounds so weak, so small like this. Fit... Fit cannot stand it, not at all. He reaches a little further, and manages to put his hand on Phil's shoulder.

Philza's own hand reaches over, clinging to it.

"I promise," Fit says. "We'll wake you if we leave. We won't let anything weird happen, its just sleep."

Philza turns, and his eyes do not seem to trust Fit. But they are also exhausted, and desperate, and terrified.

"Go to sleep, Phil. I won't until you do."

"I'm sorry," Philza whispers, sounding absolutely broken. "Thank you. Both of you. I know... I'm sorry."

Fit squeezes his shoulder again.

"It'll be alright," Fit replies. "I've got you. I've got both of you. It's going to be okay."

Nothing else is said before they eventually fall asleep.

#qsmp fanfic #qsmp philza #qsmp fit #qsmp pac #this is what I actually wanted to write today but working out the stuff with Bagi as well was hard #coping mechanism: worry about someone else instead of yourself #none of them are okay and they all need a hug #they got one in canon! #this is some more #and now my hands are completely dead #fuck three minifics in a day ow #brain really is just on nyoom today #it will not shut up #ao3 might take a bit see hand complaints #i'd like to get it up before bed but we'll see if I can handle the mouse #else it'll be... sometime tomorrow I have meetings

[luck-of-the-drawings]

[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]

saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi riptide #gillion tidestrider #GONNA START FORMATTING MY COMICS BETTER. W THE PROPER 'PREV' 'NEXT' LINKS #REALLY DIDNT EXPECT TO CONTINUE THIS SERIES BUT AAAUUUHH MY BRRAAAIN MY BRAIN IS SO IDEASSS. I HAVE 3 OTHER PAGES SKETCHED OUT #NO PROMISES ILL FINISH EM ANY TIME SOON OR EVER. MY WHIMS ARE THEIR OWN BEAST AND I ONLY DRAW ON MY WHIMS #THAT BEING SAID IF U COMMISSIONED ME ILL GEEETT TO YOUUU IM SORRYYYY. ART IS AN EMOTIONAL RELEASE FOR ME N BABY I HAVE EMOTIONS. #ESPECIALLY ABOUT GILLION TIDESTRIDER CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA HERO OF THE DEEP.for the desc here i put smth that i typed up in the tags of #another thing i made. i gotta make a proper Baby Gillion tag or smth. eventually.. eventually...I LOVE DRAWIN THIS LIL BABY GUY.. #i also LOVE depicting the teachers as just being so fuckin mean. ofc theres variation in that. just like in all things.like the teacher her #idk if itll be mentioned but the octo lady is named Ms Octburn.an octopus pun based off the name of an actual councilor i had #when i was in elementary school i got bullied alot but teachers never did anything. i hated adults and didnt trust them. #but this councilor o mine was so genuinely sweet. i remember spending alot of time w her. she doesnt work there anymore. #but that one school adult that actually earns ur trust and is there for you when they can be.its SO important for a child i think #i hope she knows how much she helped me.youll see in the next page that ms octburn isnt perfect either.but she tries. they all try.somehow. #ALL these comics are gonna be inspired by somesorta experience o mine in the school system. school is so fucked up u ever thing abt that #AND GILLIOOOOONNN IN THE MOST FUCKED UP LITTLE SCHOOL OF ALL. MAINTAINED BY A CULT. CENTERED AROUND HIM. OUR CHOSEN ONE #I IMAGINE ALOT BANKS ON HIS SUCCESS. THIS IS THE WORLD. THE WHOLE WORLD. THE PROPHECY IS GOING TO COME TRUE N UR TELLIN ME #THAT ITS THIS LITTLE IDIOT THATS GONNA BE SAVING US? WHAT IF HE FAILS. IF HE CANT GET THIS RIGHT THEN HE WILL FAIL AND WE WILL DIE #WE NEED TO TRAIN HIM. WE NEED HIM TO LEARN. AND TO SUCCEED. OR ELSE WE'RE DEAD. WE'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD. I IMAGINE THAT MUST BE STRESSFUL #in other news i hope ppl actually giggle when they read these. they ARE intended to be comical. dark humor or whatever. like its also sad #this is intended to be a sad comic series. but a funny one too. does that make sense? god i hope so.saw some1 say they had flashbacks- #-reading this. like YES!! THE INTENDED EFFECT!! YOU GET ME!! i love seeing ppl get upset on this lil baby boys behalf. i LOVE seeing ppl- #-wail n weep n cry in the comments. i LOOOVE seeing ppl RELATE to baby gillion. and i love letting u all know that this wont be a happycomi #gillion gets his happiness arc in the actual show. this series is one of unfortunate events. teehehehe. do u guys remember that show #i keep listening to the lil songs from A Series of Unfortunate Events for inspiration. GOOD STUFF!! #anyway uuhh uhh thats all i got in my brain. for now. feed me ur comments give me ur input i NNEEEEEDD THHEEEMMMM

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

helloooo have a messy scribble page of oc concepts. unfortunately, im in love and will now proceed to ramble At Length

but before that! rudimentary height chart!

all i know rn is Mairy - the cow - is about the same height as Howdy/Barnaby/Poppy (around 8ft), Hettie & Daisy are in the Wally/Julie/Sally category (around 3ft), and Jesterly is more Frank/Eddie (around 4ft). Derry Drake is fuckoff huge, and Casey is... idk really. tall but not That tall

so. rambles. i... have those, yeah

Mairy Love - she/her - lesbian a gorgeous white/blue cow! originally she was gonna be pink/white, but blue/white is my favorite color combo and honestly? it's dairy colors to me. she's big! she's strong! she's very gentle and sweet but also takes shit from no one, even though she doesn't like confrontation much (unless its playful roughhousing! jokes fly completely over her head! i'm thinking she tends to a lovely orchard of various fruit trees, and probably cultivates some crops for fun as well. maybe seasonal ones? pumpkins for the spooky season, fir trees for those snowy days, etc.

Casey J. Mittens - he/him - aro this orange fella is scaredy cat central! unfortunately for him, he's also curious to a fault! curiosity killed the cat, and he fears the day that rings true for him! he'd rather curl up at home or in a cozy tree, crocheting something cute from one of his many balls of yarn than do anything else. he tries to be a voice of reason, but is too easily convinced otherwise. he's that friend who says "we shouldn't be doing this" as he wholeheartedly assists in the shenanigan in question.

Hettie (currently undecided) - she/her - bi true to her honeybee heritage, Hettie is a florist! she boasts an impressive array of flowers that she tends to like her life depends on it. she's always running around to make sure they're all getting the best care - and she's always checking in on her pals to make sure they're taken care of, too. she's a busy bee who wouldn't know a day's rest if it stung her on the ass! It takes a lot to make her mad, but everybody better watch out when her wings start buzzing

Daisy Hop - she/him - pan i actually created Daisy as a supplementary character for a certain au, but realized i could find a place for her in this little group. i'm thinking he runs a little shop - a roadside stall, more like - where she can both sell her own homemade candy & his friends' stuff! she's the only one in the group that can keep up with Hettie's energy, and even surpass it at times. though unlike Hettie, Daisy knows how to take (and appreciate) a break!

Jesterly - whatever/is/funniest - Derry a menace. they love pranks above all else, oftentimes at the expense of others. he's always up to something and is never not scheming something! there's always Someone to bother! in all honesty she's more like an annoying stray cat that no one can get rid of... and they better not try, or they'll face the wrath of this fool's Very large partner! The jester's cap never comes off, and neither does the mask!

Derry Drake - they/them - Jesterly there's no sugarcoating it - Derry is a big lazy grump! it's almost impossible to get them out of their cave, or off of any place they decide to nap. the only thing that can reliably get them moving is the promise - or prospect - of food. it's a wonder how they've accumulated such a hoard of random things in the back of their cave, seeing as they rarely get up at all. they're incredibly nearsighted and bite first, ask questions later - after all, who knows if the colorful blob in front of them is food or not! better to be safe than hungry!

currently in my mind they have their own little community deep in the woods. Daisy lives in a modified burrow, Maisy has a cute farmhouse, Casey lives in a cozy treehouse, Hettie has a small cottage, and Derry & Jesterly live in a cave. within their community, they share practically everything. want a snack? pluck something from the orchard. need a new pair of mittens? ask Casey! i suppose you could say they're communists <3 (except for Daisy. she won't charge his friends, but anyone else is free game)

Mairy and Hettie have romantic tension, Daisy and Derry are the only ones who can tolerate Jes, Mairy wants Jes dead, Casey is terrified of Derry, Daisy's rapid-fire speech confuses everyone but Hettie, etc. i should make a chart for funsies...

#if i want to get realllly out of my comfort zone #i could talk about how my brain automatically started going 'ok this is how they interact with The Neighbors' #but i think. ill save that for now #listen listen for my whole life ive always kept my fan-ocs expressly separate from canon characters #i either put them far away from the action or in a different point in time entirely #but i can. i can have fun? with this maybe? its just a silly side thing... im playing with dolls... #i have Thoughts... #scribble salad #wh oc #welcome home oc #mairy will sometimes crush Difficult To Crush things to intimidate choice people #she's intimidating and she knows it! she'd rather be nice but sometimes a bitch has to get smacked #mairy: im a pacifist #mairy: *loading shotgun* however- #derry often steals casey's yarn for their own hoard #so casey has to go steal it back (or ask for it. either way derry makes a fuss) #I LOVE THEM. FUCK #i dont need any more ocs please... i already have several hundred...

[wildflowercryptid]

my beloved besties, i've gotten really tangled up in these towers.

#these mfs have infected my brain or something i can't stop thinking about them #i gotta draw harrow next i need to get it out of my system #also yes i'm assigning she/they pronouns to freya she's got the vibes ya know? #detective grimoire #tangle tower #detective hawkshaw #sally spears #freya fellow #penny pointer #private detective grimoire #🎨 : mj draws

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Besties can't enable pvp on each other, right?

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#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #lan jingyi #lan sizhui #jin ling #ouyang zizhen #nameless red diciple #Xue yang #yep that's right he's finally showing his true colours #I love the fact that SL and XXC's friendship is *so* legendary that even these teens know it's sacred #What they are wrong about is the fact that besties *can and will enact violence on each other* #If you aren't challenging your buddy to spar on the regular....are you really friends? #if you aren't immediately locked in a one arm fireman carry and held over their head like a handful of grapes.....whats the point #*This* is what all teens need to know about relationships. Its okay and encouraged to fight your friends. (half joking) #Don't worry about the juniors btw #XY just scoots them out of the house and makes them sit on the porch outside. I wonder what wacky hijinks they'll get up to out there? #Hopefully nothing dangerous! #My brain and body have been torched by my workload lately but I'm starting to adjust now B'*) Slowly we are getting to the end of season 1 #Thanks again for all the love and support <3 I'm leaving a half dead rat on your floor for you.