#but like its throws me off so much

[bambeliowon]

modern technology gives me such weird thoughts. we are animals. humans started in the wild just like every other animal and then we made the idea of the wild and civilized and even though we weren’t wild like before, we live in tandem to. we were still drawn to it, it was still a part of our lives. we still sought the smell of the fresh air and the flora and when we looked at the fauna we still saw ourselves no matter how much we tried to act like we were made different. nature raised us like it raised everything else. we are animals and we are wild. like i’m still the same as the people that live in caves and the people who traveled for food and the people who made rudimentary farms and then learned and grew and developed. and we all were raised by nature.

and like sometimes i look at how removed just natural processes are becoming in our modern word and it feels weird because of much of a growing necessity its becoming. because i think about how societies existed before and we lived and those things weren’t even a concept and i don’t know what my point is but it’s just a feeling in me that’s just…

humans are animals. i’m an animal. i’m a child of nature. i wanna go touch grass now.

#its a thought #a vibe #a feeling #like i watch my younger cousins use screens and stuff and feel like a boomer #but like its throws me off so much #i was running around my neighborhood and yard and making grass poitions and stick spears #i was following dogs around to know where they go #i was feeding birds and ants and politely thanking the wolf spiders for protecting the garden #i knew i lived in a house and i new the coyotes #i knew i live in a house and i knew the coyotes live in a den and birds lived in nests and that was how the world works #and i look at my cousins and wonder if they’ll grow up and know the taste of grass and the feeling of a random feather on the ground #or will they just not

[tea-cat-arts]

Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will

#svsss #scum villian self saving system #shen qingqiu #shen yuan #the fact that people think scum villain #-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction- #is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me #especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater #heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series #he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters #(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy) #I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters #like example off the top of my head- #the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx #I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes #side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me #i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation #but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years #like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right? #being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain #the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too #+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu #as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing) #bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people #another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does #also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be #he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students #and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing #+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this #but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Old Men(tor) Big Naturals

(for @3luecactuz)

#star wars #yoda #lord of the rings #gandalf #gandalf big naturals #That's an active community last I checked and I *will* throw this into that tag <3 #Thank you for letting me live my dream. #Specifically- thank you for opting into ‘surprise me’ and having the luck of the dice #Finally…I have drawn yoda big naturals…. #its like the weight of two boulders have lifted off my chest #big heaving old man shirt boulders. #All my silly words aside; thank you so much for your longtime support dear 3luecactuz B*) #Praying and hoping you also find this a delightful twist of fate and I have not inspired you to throw me overboard. #Raffle prize 1/5 done! I warned you all I was going to start by swinging a bat. Stay tuned for more this week! #No theme this time around except to have fun with the prompts <3

[martlet-my-beloved]

ran out of comic ideas so *gestures* take a doodle dump instead

First - Previous - Next - Masterpost

#oh my god tagging stuff for this au is a nightmare #undertale bluebird #martlet #undertale yellow #martlet undertale yellow #martlet uty #undertale au #frisk dreemurr #toriel dreemurr #chara dreemurr #chara: *points at martlet* excuse me who the fuck is this #i wanna escalate the story a bit further but i feel like the goofy vibes are gonna be ruined for a bit after i finally post that comic :/ #so i wanna like throw out a few more goofy ones before shit gets real for a bit #cause like a lotta jokes i wanna pull can only happen AFTER i set the scene #and unfortunately setting the scene requires a bit of seriousness(TM) #anyways im very much a momlet fan but only if shes extremely confused and very much Not Ready to be a mom #like girl is a what 21 year old who wanted to be a guard so she could slack off HER ASS AINT MOM MATERIAL #but like its really fucking funny so she gets to be a mom. for my entertainment #born to be fun older cousin forced to be a mother 😔

[koobiie]

fanart for what may be my favorite fic of all time, Running Behind by @asidian! here's prompto enjoying all the foods from the fic beacuse he deserves it <3

#ffxv #prompto argentum #final fantasy xv #final fantasy 15 #im going to be wild in the tags here for a moment. this fic makes me CRRRRRRRAZZZZZZEYYYYYYYYYYYYY #like barking snarling yowling tearing up dirt with my hands taking bites out of the drywall #its like old at this point but every couple of years i remember it and im like well here i go again! and reread it in a several hour sprint #and then scream and cry nad throw up cause i love it soooo so much #seriously i recommend it so sohard . honestly even if you dont like ffxv #ultimate hurt comfort fic checks off all my boxes 11/10 explodeing #oh yes also the art is here. yea i got carried away drawing the foods jfkdslhglks #hi author if you read these tags im sorry for pinging you about your fic that came out like. 7 years ago #but ive been meaning to make fanart for it for sooooo long cause i love it and i finally got around to it lol #koob art #digital art #im going to be pissed if theres a food i forgot to include lmao #anyways yea i <3 prompo my scrinkly winkly crunkly doo he deserfes happines. im going to disappear into the sunset now

[chaoticshark98]

the marriage certificate (template below)

#love filling out these charts cause it makes me realize bruabba are literally so close to being my ocs #also this chart has some personal hcs of both of them so ^_^ take this like a grain of salt #abba is a crazy ass cause she went to the extent of chopping her hand off for a KEY which is its own kinda of crazy #mean while bucci literally throws himself and crawls all over proscuitto #risking his life in order to drag proscuitto off a moving TRAIN… so he is a truck freak #both ordeals were very much homoerotic or whatever #bruabba #bruno bucciarati #leone abbacchio #jjba #jojos bizzare adventure vento aureo #jjba part 5

[lunarharp]

when an obsessed orufrey person plays ace attorney for the first time in a while

#witch hat tag #orufrey #you know those times when the defendant is still in shambles at the end of a case because it was not a clear-cut thing #but you get to present one Special Sentimental piece of evidence that proves not all is lost #qifrey's breakdown would be like... he turns up calm and pleasant like dahlia kristoph gant etc but very quickly: #well first he's hiding his scar so you have to use the bracelet and also you find out about the seal on his hat using that. #eventually he is throwing water that comes out of nowhere like that coffee prosecutor guy. and his cape starts billowing #the more he breaks down his neck thingies start coming undone btw. To represent his descent into guilt and his LIES becoming undone. #course as the player i have already used my magatama and seen his 35894 psychelocks. but theyre those BLACK psychelocks #representing his repressed memories taken by the brimhats. also his glasses shatter out of nowhere when you keep presenting evidence #and tartah's testimony etc. and the player is like UHH this guy is A PUPPET MASTER but coco's heartfelt testimony commands the tone #and of course he's someone who has been twisted and damaged by trauma like adrian andrews. the mastermind is of course the brimhats #only me with my magatama knows that... only i can do it. It has to be me..... #just like how as the reader i can see everything about qifrey and i can hold him dear as much as i judge him #whereas if i were oru things would not be ok unless memories can be restored and mentally ill decisions can be illuminated #WELL ANYWAY !!!!! what i appreciate about ace attorney is its ability to mix silliness with seriousness #i cant usually make jokes about serious heavy heartbreaking stuff in witch hat because it is all very intense emotions for me #but i appreciate ace attorney's mix of sincerity and psychological pain and the inherent silliness to being a character in a situation #so.....Get Iguin on the stand. Now. BAILIFF.. TAKE OFF THE MASK #i would most love to be able to prove qifrey's eyesight is failing. hed be like I have no reason to pursue the brimhats (smiles pleasantly) #and it would be like You're lowering your gaze.. proof that the court lighting is too harsh for you..! #his glasses would crack at that moment btw. I used apollo's bracelet and saw the glyphs on the glass. #I know all about u. and i will save u

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

sheesh speaking of psychic damage, bro is trying to kill himself with his mind here

#14: i get you alone without witnesses and its fuckign over #15: youre making me look SO bad rn #'as if i would ever do that! hugs <3' #14 knowing all his own tricks: i dont trust you as far as i can throw you #theres a lot of fun to be had here actually wrt like. who knows/thinks/believes what right? #like for 15 the bigeneration was Bad. for 14 we dont know #they might be doing a double act! theyve got the same dog in the fight right? #its a really good shot you should go watch this oh my goddddddd obsessed #so much to be read into this #like dont get fooled by the hugging they know Exactly who they are and they Do Not fucking like that person #15 kicks them out Immediately! #hes like okay this was fun :) get the fuck out of my house #its very ruth doctor 'i'd like it if you got off my ship now' #its very very that #14 knows its that #they know themselves well enough i dont think hes fooled by 15 #i'll rewatch the whole thing to see the rest of it. in context of these thoughts. bc i havent thought abt this before #but i dont think 14 is fooled at all #he knows who he is. he knows what hes like. he knows what hes to be trusted on and what Not #'im fine bc you fix yourself' 14 is like yeah Right #'idk what the fuck is gonna happen but youre FineTM. FineTM is the best we do'

[autisticlee]

sometimes I have autistic realizations that hit really hard.

I'm listening to a podcast (science vs) episode about meditation and what it does/how you do it/if it works. first there was an example of a meditation for mindfulness and focusing on breathing and how it feels. I was thinking how that seems pointless because i'm always aware of how it feels to breathe: my chronically stuffy nose, asthma, ribcage/back hurting if I breathe too deep/etc. but I already knew I have to think about breathing more than most people or I might accidentally hold my breath, and my chronic stuffy nose is very annoying to deal with.

then this part i'm at now talks about how most people go through taking a shower without really realizing they're doing it, like they arent feeling the shower sensations and just go through the motions. so mindful showering is feeling the water on your skin, feeling the temperature of the water and how it changes, etc. "being present, knowing what it feels like, knowing you are there and alive and having that experience..." and that's what mindfulness is.

the thing about me, due to being autistic, i'm basically practicing mindfulness 24/7 against my will. my sensory units in my brain are on constant overdrive and I cannot turn them off. i'm aware of every sensation and feeling and sound and etc at all times and can't ignore them.

the big realization this gave me is that...I'm profoundly aware of being alive and present. i'm overly aware of what i'm experiencing at all times. while most people can use mindfulness to ground themselves from overwhelm and anxiety caused by every day life worries, I GET anxiety and overwhelm from mindfulness-like experiences.

how do i tune things out and turn off my brain? I need an anti-mindfulness method that isn't dissociating out of my mind 😅

#autism #autistic #actually autistic #mindfulness #any other autistic people feel this way ir have this experience? #I feel like mindfulness could help the autistic people with low sensory feeling and need more stimulation #but for the ones who are always overstimulated and have high sensory experiences its so pointless #ive had it suggested to me so much and it always sounds so absurd to focus deeply on things i cant ignore...... #its exhausting to be unable to ignore them so making me focus more on them would possibly throw me into a panic attack? #brains are interesting #i dissociate a lot and its always the first thing people suggest. but i think one reason i dissociate is #my constant unintentional mindfulness i naturally do that i cant shut off 😅 #sometimes the way to turn it off is to dissociate to hell and back lmao

[jesperjohansen]

this is a drippy fan account now. not sorry

#this is supposed to be an april fools thing but since i dont feel like changing my tumblr layout #its just a lot of drippys. and like. yeah sure HSDJFHDS #i made my discord profile drippy themed and its throwing me off so much #ni no kuni #ni no kuni wrath of the white witch #nnk #nnk1 #nnk wotww #wotww #ni no kuni drippy

[musclegoth]

dark souls 4 would cure me

#i just miss the world and the lore so much #its always there to revisit ofc #but i just want more stories.... #elden ring is brilliant n i adore it but there is something missing n i cant quite put my finger on it ? #i think its the gameplay it just throws me off and doesnt lend itself well to the way i like to play/experience these games #i still think it's stellar and i will play more probably but #it's not scratching the itch #i legit dont know why tho other than this #i did love it at launch for sure but now that ive stepped back from it im just not as hooked as the others

[infizero]

scar is NEVER beating the hopelessly in love with grian allegations i fear

#me when my interpretations are always proven right. me when its inadvertently canonized that scar still thinks about him and #grian in 3rd life and that he yearns for those days again. while grian acts like he'd rather jump off a cliff than do that again #(even though he does care deep down hes just insane and traumatized and autistic and arospec ❤️) #but srsly. first him making sunflowers his whole thing this season (flowers grian gave him. accidentally(?)) #and now him changing it to THE Flowers he gave grian lifetimes ago #like he is so not over grian its fucking insane. this is actually insane #also ive meant to say this but like. something about the sunflowers being something grian was seemingly just like. #throwing out of his inventory and scar just happened to pick up. and then scar fashioning his entire outfit and base around them. #something something scar taking anything he can get. something something scar trying to convince himself grian gave him those intentionally #i love scar so much but he is a little delulu i fear 😭 #serena.txt #namemc spoilers #slsmp spoilers

[rainymoodlet]

Kiss Me in Komorebi+ 🌸

[Episode Five] One Last Push!

These two have such an easy energy when talking to each other, it's fantastic! They discussed the secrets of Moonwood Mill and delved into many a "deep conversation": the minute these two get rolling, it's very hard to stop them! Josiah wasn't a very public man before coming on the show, but I think we can all agree that Daniel is very happy he did! Very happy, indeed!

[ Part 13/?? ] 🌹

@retro-plasma

#ts4 #ts4 screenshots #ts4 gameplay #ts4 edit #ts4 challenge #ts4 bachelor challenge #;kmik #sim: daniel #josiah bolton by retro-plasma #|| #that last shot of dan being out of focus literally made me want to eat my own hands off but!!! #i love writing these two together heehee #i cannot even tell you how often they queue up deep conversations with one another!! #dan likes to talk to him about selvadoradan culture and josiah seems to adore talking abt moonwood mill with him #they have a very easy time talking to one another #and though their conversations delve into the deep zone #they've yet to make a lot of overtures to each other flirtatiously #but the vibe is still very much there!! #dan will throw in a flirt here and there and it always makes josiah fan himself its so cute #if dan can bond over one thing its how many places he's traveled to and how many of them he loves #but we'll wait to see just how deep these convos can go~ #i hope josiah's voice comes through here!! #i desperately adore him and his studious mind hehe he's always debating the other contestants and trying to teach them abt various fish #i have so many notebook pop-ups of learning abt various fish from the other contestants and its always josiah whose tellin them facts dskjf

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Ok I’m glad I found the actual ask box instead of the EMBARASSING thing I did earlier, aside from that

How long does it usually take you to make a drawing? :3 I know it’s different depending on the caliber of the drawing but for an example let’s say just Barnaby and Wally doing whatever in a scene

I’m very curious about your process!! ^w^

i just saw what you mean and for your sake i'll Pretend I Did Not See lol. its ok tho it happens, Tumblr's a tough cookie to wrangle

hm. it Does vary wildly, both depending on quality, how used to scribbling a thing i am, and how well the art-mojo is flowing! on a bad night, a simple sketch could take an hour while the same sketch on a good night could take 15 minutes

and it's also hard to say since i don't really keep track! for example, The First One in this collage is a more involved sketch and i suspect it took thirty minutes maybe? i remember having some Difficulties so maybe longer? trying to get size differences between multiple characters in the same sketch adds a Lot of time, as does making sure they interact properly. while the last one in the collage (the Nom) probably took closer to ten minutes

i know the Laughingstock in Aziracrow's outfits i belted out in, oh... an hour or three? it's really hard to say! i think it was several bc i was watching gomens at the time, and i think it got through a couple of episodes... clothes add a lot of time! but certain things that i thought i did Quickly took hours in reality, and i only notice when i look up and see the clock has Changed Drastically! i have a very loose perception of time!

it really just depends on my motivation & how used to drawing something i am. like scribbling Eddie takes a while, lots of guidelines and erasing and redrawing. but scribbling Barnaby? easy. takes me seconds in comparison. way less guidelines - i know where everything is and where it goes! drawing dragons takes even less time - This One was done in a Blink, and the only guides i used were head circle / snout circle / jawline.

#the Size of the sketch absolutely makes a big difference #like sketch comms are really tough since im drawing them at a Much bigger resolution #and it throws off the feel of the brush & i have to go about it in a drastically different way than what im comfortable with #because i want to provide the Best Resolution/Quality possible! #and then tiny sketches are easy and quick cause it's close quarters. cozy! #and im more accustomed to keeping my brushstrokes Tight and Short #but im slowly getting used to scribbling Bigger! #just today i realized i was automatically scribbling larger than i used to #good! higher quality! #it will translate into my comms hopefully! #i still have one left... ive been slowly chipping away at it #rambles from the bog #i think im underestimating the time... #bc i Do draw slowly i think #it usually takes a while! #unless im In The Zone and then im belting things out at lightspeed #like remember that glorious time period where i was posting every day often Twice a day and the queue was backed up for Days? #yeah.... me too.... #i am very rarely in the Zone #its tough to think and its tough to Create and the process is so much!!! #it takes Energy i rarely have! so that slows it down too... #but yeah my 'process' is very much Not a process lmao #in the wise words of hobie brown: i dont believe in consistency #its not in my nature! to my detriment more often than not!

[zymstarz]

yeah sure that's how i'll [re]come out

#zymart #zymtalk #rant in the tags -> #okay listen to me this is really important and also i have a witness. this was not intentionally supposed to be posted on june 1st #the stars just aligned for this to be at its funniest. which means its also easier for me to dismiss LOL #i drew this like a week ago after trying to draw a whole like. 5 page comic about it and then stopping it mid-board #bc it was horrifying imagining being perceived that much. so i needed to make it into a joke instead and this was the funniest route #and then i was like 'UGH. UGH!!!! i can not be 20 and deal with this like im 13. if i dont post it by the end of the week #then [the witness to all my rants on this topic. shoutout to twig bc they got the most of it] can joke abt it as if i did anyway' #and now its the end of the week and i looked at the date and went 'oh my god didnt may just start what happened' #'WAIT ITS JUNE FIRST. GOD. THATS TOO FUNNY TO NOT SAY SOMETHING' and who am i if i dont prioritize the bit honestly #in all honesty. kinda hate it! not bc of internalized homophobia but actually bc of internalized arophobia that has somehow been emphasized #after having my brain shift from '1000% aromantic without a doubt no exceptions' to 'just arospec ig lol??' #but tragically as it turns out. you can not just try and self analyze yourself into speedrunning closure. #horrible news for the oscar zymstarz community frankly #SO i needed a way 2 justify shoving this off my plate and into the trash as fast as possible. #im impatient and cant acknowledge my own emotions. its a flaw im working on it #oh and for all the ppl who know the running gag abt 'my allegations' [i do not have any real allegations for anyone not in jems server]: #that was in fact just a running gag for like well over a year and a half. like that was just a long running bit COMPLETELY unrelated to thi #i only started having this weird sexuality shift or whatever not too long ago lol. like long enough to go through 4 of the 5 stages of grie #[evidently bc like. im posting this. i got close enough to 5 to throw in the towel ykwim] #but on 'oscar zymstarz emotional acknowledgement' time that is....... not long. #but yeah ig tldr like. still ace [thank god] just arospec [probably demiro? i hate trying to figure out my own labels] instead of Aro now #idk none of this is that deep but also like it kinda is unfortunately bc i have to actually talk abt it to be able to ignore it ykwim #but i did! we're done talking abt it now! and now i can act like i dont care and try to make jokes about it to speedrun the rest of it #anyway. Happy Pride everyone. Fukign kitty. #side message to jem. by no means does this mean im not still gonna bully you. its a sign of love but also it is you specific bullying 🫶 #you are not safe

[skarloeyspa]

WHOS READY FOR SOME CENTENNIALS!!!!!! unasked for explanations below once again

This set of designs is different from Ryan's because i basically just traced my old sketches and redid them digitally to give them colour so there are less design details (sorry lmao)

ANYWAY continuing with the "time-accurate" clothing choices, I'm hoping it's more obvious with loey and neas this time. You have no idea how RELIEVED i felt when i saw neas' third overhaul was in the 2000s. I love details but I have been working with suits for like 30 designs by now.

Because I did these back in october I don't really have proper ref images but if you googled men's fashion for each of their respective eras you should get pretty good results and if you don't im sorry💀

Not sure if it's obvious but they're supposed to "age" with every overhaul, yea im aware my ability to draw people older than 40 is nonexistent-

On that note, I have a more in-depth hc for how the "human" of an engine appears which would explain how loey and neas can "age" but the short version is the "human" is a combination of the maturity of an engine's mentality and the engine's actual age

I do not know enough of the Skarloey Railway lore to back my headcanons but I hc that during their early days, the SR was more strict with appearances, hence the suit jackets and whatnot (kinda like how RWS SR engines all have the same livery)

Towards the SR's later days, the change of directorship and the increasing diversity of their rolling stock led to much more relaxed regulations on appearances. The jackets that the overhaul 2 designs are holding would look similar to the jacket that overhaul 1 loey is wearing, which would bear the engine's nametag and the signature red shoulder pad designating an engine's gauge

Also the nametag and specifically the number badge were details added later when I finished my handel and petah designs, yes I love it a lot that's why i mentioend it.

Overhaul 1 neas is particularly different from overhaul 1 loey because for one they're two different decades, but also the time between his first and second overhaul was when neas had to run the line on his own (not to mention the world war woah...)

I haven't really figured out specific height hcs yet but neas and loey are around the same height as each other but grow a tad with each overhaul

ok das it for this one i think, thank yall for the wonderful reception of ryan im so happy yall loved him😭🥹also thanks for making it to the end next time it's probably gonna be handel and petah<3

#ttte skarloey #ttte rheneas #ttte humanized #ttte #i was working on and off this for a whole ass week thats why this took so long #that said im thinking of throwing duncan in a blender (uncalled for???) hes like a squeaky toy #capy's graffiti #pictures in the reception hall #capy posting #also i was rewatching slotlt the other day and like. its actually ridiculous #if thomas' drivers had any will of their own none of this would have happened #unfortunately that little fucker was driving around helping some guy dig at like. 4am and the drivers were just like aight cool #and you KNOW they were in there cuz they were there during the entire end chase scene #like they HAD to address that by showing thomas' crew jumping out before he fell into the sea #also ryan during the chase scene. “hey mr crew i know ur off work but im really worried about my train friend can we go for a drive :(” #and those crazy bitches said YEAH SURE AND THEY WENT #LIKE IS THE PAY THAT GOOD???? #dont get me wrong id drive around with ryan at 2am any day of the week but like #so much of the cgi era's events were dependent on the trains' crews having 0 autonomy beyond driving an engine #and i just think thats so hilarious