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#dint think it could be real

shijieswife · 3 months

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now see lwj is really all that because hes somehow so normal while also being completely unhinged. only a real king could do that. sure, hes the most normal outta the mxtx tops, but also that rlly isnt hard to do, and hes still a FREAK.

this man kissed wwx blindfolded and then killed an entire lineage of trees out of shame and horniness. he didnt spend the thirteen years pining away or plotting for wwx to come back somehow. he didnt spend years avenging wwx, and instead raised wwxs radish with wwxs values, honoured wwxs memory by teaching the new generation to be just and fair, to think outside the box. when wwx came back he was Not Letting Him Go, and dragged him back to gusu kicking and screaming. he never expected wwx to love him back, and dint take him with the expectation that he would.

like, yeah he kidnapped wwx, but hed NEVER keep him in gusu against his will, and that is what is so amazing abt lwj !

#mdzs #lan wangji

228 notes · View notes

cowgurrrl · 3 months

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Keep the Wolves Away

Pairing: Joel Miller x fem!reader

Author's note: Dedicated to my real life Andies. Thank you for making me feel easy to love.

Summary: The worst decision [5.2k]

Warnings: platonic threatening, discussions of bad mental health, so much flirting that (spoiler alert) might be real, possible THE shittiest ex I ever could've written, all the southern pet names, alcohol consumption, the resurgence of an old nude of readers, gaslighty behavior, smoking cigarettes (don't smoke kids), Joel talking reader out of a spiral, two (2) kisses

"So, it's a date." Andie declares once you're done explaining everything to her over FaceTime. You pause your blush application to roll your eyes at her.

"It's not a date!"

"I'm sorry, so I'm just supposed to believe you when you say you're going to be just friends with the hot, sweet single dad who sounds like he's head over heels for you?"

"He is not head over heels for me." You sound a little petulant, and Andie laughs like she did when you were in high school and trying to hide a crush from her.

"Babe, he willingly went on a high school field trip just so he could see you."

"His daughter was there. I'm sure he wanted to spend time with her."

"I'm sure he did because he's a great dad, but he also wanted to see you in your element. It's sexy watching someone do the thing they love."

"Yeah, yeah." You brush her off, and she scoffs. You toss your makeup brush back into its bag and check out your outfit in the mirror. It's nothing insane— just a plain black slip dress— but now that Joel's arrival is getting closer and closer, you're rethinking everything. "Do I look okay?"

"You look stunning!" Andie chirps. "I'm sure your not boyfriend will think the same thing."

"I'm going to get a plane ticket to Austria just so I can choke you out with my own two hands." You threaten, but she laughs so hard you can't stop smiling. Once the trans-Atlantic giggling dies down, the line goes quiet, and you take a deep breath as you pull your mascara out.

"Are you nervous to see him?" She asks gently. Andie came home for the summer dubbed The Dark Days. She stayed over when the one-bedroom apartment felt too big and got you out of the house when you couldn't stand the four walls anymore. She took whatever he left behind to his new apartment so you wouldn't have to (and gave him a piece of her mind while she was at it). She made you believe in love again. Not sticky, frustrating, unpredictable romantic love but pure, easy, all-knowing love that can only come from long-enduring relationships such as yours.

For a long time after he left, you thought you were hard to love. Too loud, too bright, too much. Until you were out at a bar with her one night, trying to find the remnants of your independence and self-esteem tucked under sweaty beers and cracked leather chairs, when someone pointed out how similar you and Andie were. "Like two sides of the same coin," the woman told you. Andie is one of the easiest people in the world to love with her quick wit, creativity, and smile. And you realized for the first time if you had even a shred of that, even if only by dint of knowing and being loved by her, then you must be easy to love too. You must be worth the mess and heartache and stained fingerprints.

So, yeah, Andie was less than pleased to hear that all that hard work could be undone by seeing him again, but she was supportive.

"I don't know," you sigh. "I'm not a kid anymore. I've had more years without him than I did with him, but it's still scary."

"I know."

"I don't even know what I'm gonna say to him."

"He'll probably be too busy with the gallery and everything. Maybe you won't even have to." She says, and you groan at the uncertainty of everything.

"God, why did I say yes?" You ask as a knock interrupts your whining. You end your call with a quick "I love you, thank you, I'll text you" before throwing your phone down. "Come in!" You yell from the bathroom as you rapidly finish doing your makeup. There's a pause on the other side before he jiggles the knob and finally comes in. "I'm just finishing up in the bathroom. Give me a minute."

"D'you always leave your door unlocked?" Joel asks. The sound of his unsure footsteps reaches your ears, and you smile at the thought of him looking around your apartment like a lost toddler.

"Only when I know someone's coming over," you say. "Sorry, it's a mess."

"Oh, this is nothin'. You should see Ellie's room." He says, his feet pacing the floor. You swipe on a cute lipstick you never wear and finally step out into the living room where Joel is waiting. He's wearing a black button-up shirt with nice pants as he stands with his back to you, looking at some of the things on your wall.

"Well, don't you look nice?" You compliment, making him turn around with a shy smile. His eyes roam over you, taking in every detail or sliver of skin he hasn't seen before. His intense gaze reminds you of how he looked at you in the bar when you were sure his eyes would melt you. He looks dumbstruck, and his Adam's apple bobs when his eyes finally settle on your face.

"Wow… you look-"

"Choose carefully." You tease to take some of the tension out of the room.

"Beautiful," he says, thwarting your efforts. "You always look beautiful."

"Thank you. Not so bad yourself."

"You like it? Ellie helped me pick it out," he anxiously fiddles with the sleeves of his shirt. "Feels weird."

"What specifically feels weird?" You ask, stepping closer to him to examine his outfit. He smells like aftershave and the cologne he's prone to wearing. Why the fuck do you have his cologne memorized, you think to yourself.

"I dunno. I think I just feel outta place."

"Well, you don't look out of place," you say. "These might be what's doing it, though." You tap the top buttons of his shirt, the ones buttoned all the way up to his chin like a toddler going to Christmas mass.

"Ellie said I should do all of 'em since it's a fancy art thing."

"Well, you should stop taking fashion advice from a fifteen-year-old," you laugh. "I promise it's not fancy enough to justify being uncomfortable."

"I'm takin' your word for it." He says as he reaches up to undo his top two buttons, revealing freckles across his chest and collarbones and the tiniest sliver of a gold chain resting against his throat. For some reason, you can't tear your eyes away from the veins in his neck or the delicate necklace stuck to his warm skin. "What, it really looks that bad?" He thankfully breaks through your thoughts, and you try to recover by shaking your head.

"No, no. Not at all. You look really nice," you say, clearing your throat. "Let me get my purse, and we can go." You don't even wait for him to respond. You just turn on your heels and walk to your bedroom. In the security of your bedroom, you let out a long exhale and try to get your mind back on track.

You're just nervous. He's being nice. You're being nice back. It's nothing. It's nothing. It's nothing, you mentally chant. When you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, you almost have to laugh at the fierce blush on your cheeks and the distracted look in your eyes. "You better get it together." You say, pointing at yourself in the mirror like it's gonna do anything to make tonight smoother.

The gallery is packed when you get there. Joel curses under his breath as he tries to find a parking spot, and you try to keep your anxiety at bay. All you have to do is show your face, look at the paintings, and leave. Maybe you can manage to steal a bottle of the cheap wine they're undoubtedly serving. It'll be an hour. Two tops. You can do this.

You're so in your head that you didn't notice that Joel parked the car or that he was looking at you until he bumped your knee with his.

"You okay?" He asks. You take a deep breath and nod.

"Just need a second." You mumble. You fiddle with your earrings, your dress, anything to keep your hands busy as you psyche yourself up.

"When's the last time you saw this asshole?"

"He wasn't always an asshole," you try to redirect, but he raises his eyebrows at you. "Since I graduated college."

"We don't have to go in." He offers easily, and you give him a look.

"Yes, we do. My name's on the list and everything."

"So?" He shrugs. "The world's not gonna end just cause one person didn't show up."

"But you drove all the way here."

"And I can drive you all the way back. Besides, it's nice having a pretty girl in my truck. It wouldn't hurt to have you here next to me for a little while longer." He says, and you laugh, feeling some weight lift off your shoulders.

"You get many pretty girls sitting in your truck?"

"Just my pretty girls."

"Right." You say, and he smiles, creating familiar crinkles in the corners of his eyes. They look a little deeper in the moonlight, but his eyes shine differently. Your fingers itch to draw them if only to critique your work and find the answer to why he has such an effect on you. You're aware that you're staring, but you also can't find it in yourself to look away. Not when he's staring back at you so fondly.

"What can I do to help you?" He asks. You feel like you could cry at the sincerity in his voice. You've talked to Ellie about her anxiety, so you know he has some practice in dealing with it, but he's acting like it's second nature. Like this is what he was meant to do. He bumps you again when you start messing with your purse. "Do you want this to be like at the bar? Do you want me to take you home and pretend like we were never here? Do you want me to go in there and crack some skulls? You say the word— any word— and I'll do it for you, darlin'."

Darlin’. It's what he called you when you promised revenge for almost kissing you at the bar. Normally, you'd be against any form of pet name. Henry was not openly affectionate in that way, and you learned not to expect it from him. But here's Joel, dropping the term of endearment almost every time he's been alone with you. It could be that cowboy accent or his knee pressed against yours, but the nickname fills your chest with warmth and pushes away your anxiety.

"Any word, huh?" You ask, and he chuckles.

"My mama raised me not to make promises I didn't have every intention of followin' through on." He says. "What'll it be?"

"I think… I just need you to be there with me."

"Then, that's what I'll do."

"Okay." You mumble, and he smiles as a new wave of comfort washes over you.

"Okay." He says.

"Okay." You take a deep breath and look at him in the driver's seat one more time. "Let's do this." Finally, you open the door and step down from his truck. He's quick to come to your side and offer you his arm before he can even finish locking the car. You smile, tuck your hand under his bicep, and let him keep you upright as you walk in.

The gallery is full of people who look way more qualified than you— art critics, journalists, and other artists who can actually sell a piece. They barely glance at you and Joel when you breach the doorway, which you're silently grateful for. When a waiter walks by with champagne glasses, Joel quickly snatches two glasses from the tray and hands you one.

"Here's to us." He says, and you cock an eyebrow at him.

"Us?"

"Well, we're sure as hell not toastin' to that asshole, are we?"

"I guess not," you laugh as you clink your glasses together. "To us." You each take a sip, and Joel tries to hide his reaction to the champagne, but you see right through it. "Not your speed?"

"Not at all." He groans as he chokes it down.

"Don't worry, maverick, we'll get you something else later." You promise and tuck your hand back under his arm as you start walking through the gallery.

A lot of his newer work resembles his work from college— normal portraits of things like fruits, beds, or people but with unexpected lines of colors lining them like they're vibrating. You even recognize some from your college days. You just never expected them to actually be displayed in this way, not even when you were dating and telling him what a good artist you thought he was. Some have vague titles like "$12" and "Jack," while others are untitled. You can see why it would get taken in by a gallery. There's a very clear skill in how he paints and manipulates everyday objects into something new. It would be impressive if it was interesting.

Maybe you're just used to the way he paints. Maybe this is exactly what you expected of him. Maybe you thought he would've grown, if not in attitude than, at least, in skill. But it's clear that too many people told him good things about his work, and he saw nothing he needed to change or fix. Somehow, it makes you feel better, not worse, about your own art.

"So, are these supposed to be good or bad?" Joel whispers to you as you get closer to the next section, and you laugh a little too loudly. The people around you give you nasty looks, but you can't find it in yourself to be sorry.

"Like I said at the museum, I can't tell you that, but…" you glance around to make sure nobody's listening to you. "As someone who saw him make a lot of art, this is definitely not his best."

"Okay, that's what I thought," he says before pointing at a specific part of the painting. "The shape is really weird right there, like he ran outta space or somethin'." You let go of his arm and step between him and the painting, smiling knowingly.

"Did you study for this?" You ask, and he nervously plays with the chain around his neck.

"I may have… snuck a look at Ellie's notes." He admits sheepishly, and your eyes widen.

"You were actin' like you were gonna have to rely on me this whole time! You don't need me to tell you what good art is!"

"Yeah, but I want you to."

"Oh, whatever. C'mon, I wanna hear what else you think." You pretty much drag him to the next section of the gallery, but he's pliant and almost giddy at your hold on him. You take more time in the next part, and he ducks so his lips are near your ear to point out little things he notices. He said he was scared of being wrong in front of people "smarter than him," but all the observations he makes are valid and accurate. He lets you add your own analysis to his and watches you with a smile when you start talking with your hands excitedly. Suddenly, you're not nearly as miserable as you thought you would be, and you're even laughing together as you jump from painting to painting.

"See, this isn't so bad!" You say as you move to the final part, but your smile and enthusiasm die when you step over the threshold. There, staring at you unashamedly is the painting Henry did of you when you were twenty and topless. He told you it was for his own artistic development, and you were more than happy to do it for him. You just never thought he would've kept it after all these years. Thank God your face isn't visible in the painting, but your rigid posture tells Joel everything he needs to know. He politely turns his back to the painting and steps between you and your likeness.

"You wanna go?" He whispers at the same time someone calls your name. You take a deep breath and grab Joel's hand for support as you turn around and face Henry. His wavy blonde hair frames his face like it did in college but he's matured. His beard is a little more filled in, and he's gotten a little broader. Other than that, he's still the same person you met freshman year.

"I'm so glad you could make it!" He says as he approaches. He doesn't try to hug you, and you don't move to let go of Joel's hand. "You look great. I mean, you always looked great, but you know what I meant," he says, looking over you. Only when Joel clears his throat does Henry even look at him. "Oh, sorry, man! We're old friends. I'm Henry." He holds his hand out for Joel to meet halfway, but he doesn't. You think it probably took fighting every single bit of southern hospitality in his veins to stop himself from shaking Henry's hand.

"'M Joel." He says, and Henry awkwardly drops his hand.

"Nice to meet you, Joel. How are you enjoying the exhibition?"

"'S alright." Is all Joel offers, not willing to gas up Henry's ego anymore, and you have to stifle a laugh at the expectant look on Henry's face. "Well, I think we were just goin'."

"Oh, so soon? You haven't even seen the last few pieces."

"Are those any better than the thirty identical ones I already saw?"

"Joel," you scold quietly, and his jaw flexes when you look at him.

"It's okay. Not everyone understands art enough to enjoy it." Henry says.

"Oh, I understand everythin' just fine." You swear Joel would've punched him if he wasn't holding your hand so tight. You step in between them and raise your eyebrows at Joel. His shoulders are squared, and you can feel the molten anger rolling off him, but it softens just a bit when he meets your eyes. You squeeze him twice to let him know you're okay, and he nods.

"Can you get me a refill on champagne? I think they're still walkin' around with some." You suggest. He gets the hint, but he obviously doesn't like it. He glances between you and Henry like he's trying to make a decision but folds when you mouth, "please," at him.

"’Course," he says through gritted teeth. "Anythin' else I can get for you, baby?" Baby, that's a new one, you think.

"No, I'm alright. Thanks, though." You say. Without thinking, you let your other hand rest on his jaw and kiss Joel's cheek. His jaw unclenches when your fingertips graze his stubble, and his shoulders relax when your lips make contact with his skin, but you know he's still upset because you're still upset. Joel smiles and walks away before you can get a good look at the blush creeping up his neck, and you're resigned to watching him disappear into the crowd.

"He seems nice," Henry says the second Joel is out of earshot, and you have to resist the urge to laugh.

"He is."

"How'd you two meet?"

"Through work." You say, knowing that bringing up teaching will make his skin crawl. He sucks his teeth and nods, the champagne in his glass sloshing slightly.

"Ah," he says. "That's nice."

"Yeah," you agree. An awkward silence falls over the two of you quickly, and you're itching to find Joel in the sea of people. Henry notices your lack of attention on him.

"It's really good to see you," he says. "I feel like I haven't talked to you in forever."

"Yeah, that's usually what happens when you leave someone."

"That's kinda why I invited you here tonight. I wanted to apologize for the way things ended," he acts brokenhearted and torn up about it, but he's years too late for the pity party he's expecting. "I should've talked to you about what was going on. We were just... becoming so different, and it felt like you were always talking to Andie or other people in the program, and there was no way to reach you."

"What are you talking about? I asked you multiple times if we were okay, and you said yes every time. I was talking to Andie so much because I needed someone who would understand me and be able to help." You say, and he waves his hand like he's swatting flies.

"Let's not do this. My therapist says it's not healthy to rehash the past like this. I just wanted to make amends and let you know I'm sorry for how you felt." It's not an apology. Not a real one, anyway. Jesus Christ, what did you ever see in him? Before you can even open your mouth to say something, he gestures to the gallery. "So, what do you think about all this? Crazy, right?"

"It's... something," you say. "Wish you would've given me a heads up about that one before I brought someone with me." You point in the direction of your half-naked body on the wall, and he gives you a confused look.

"I thought I did in the email."

"Nope, I think I would've remembered if you said something about a half-naked painting of me from college being displayed," you shake your head. "Why do you even still have that? I thought you would've thrown it away or painted over it or something."

"Why would I do that? It's a good piece."

"I know it's good because it's my body. What's weird is you leaving me without a word one day and then keeping a naked picture of me all these years."

"I didn't even think of it as your body. After a while, it was just a body," he says with no remorse, and you think you might hit him yourself. "Besides, you should take this as a compliment. Not many women get the opportunity to be depicted as art. It's a wonderful thing. You might even thank me one day when you're older." Finally, you see Joel walking toward you with a glass of champagne, and you take refuge in the fact that he's returning for you. "But, from what I can see, they've definitely stayed the same, so you probably don't have anything to worry about." He says like it's a secret or a compliment. You don't even wait for Joel to say or do anything. You just grab the wine from him and throw it in Henry's face. The people in the immediate vicinity gasp as you slap him and shove the empty glass into his hands.

"Out of all the stupid things I imagined for myself when I was younger, thinking I would marry you was the stupidest," you spit. "Don't you ever try to fucking contact me again."

You feel like a fucking idiot. What did you expect? An apology? Repentance? Regret? He barely apologized when you were together. Why would he start now? God, was he always that bad? How could you have been so blind? How could you have shed so many tears over him? How could you have let yourself be so vulnerable with him and for so many years? It's a miracle he didn't call the cops and try to get the two of you arrested, even though Joel didn't do anything. You think, at least. The second you finished your sentence, you ran to the bathroom to cry and then snuck out through the back to wait outside Joel's truck. For all you know, Joel (rightfully) beat his ass and is on the run from artsy Austin hipsters.

You put the lit cigarette back in your mouth and take a long drag, the familiar burning in your lungs a sick relief. You quit during The Dark Days because smoking was something he did, and you wanted to rid yourself of any reminder of his impact on your life. Apparently, at the same time you were scrubbing his fingerprints from your bones, he was in possession of and doing God knows what with the visual reminder of your vulnerability and love-sickness and acted like it was nothing. Like it was a compliment. Like it was just an object instead of your body. Andie would be pissed if she were here but especially if she saw you smoking after she braved all those shaky days and nights of nicotine patches and dried fruit and whatever other remedy recommended to help you quit smoking. You half-expect the same anger when you see Joel walking toward you.

"Before you even start, I know I shouldn't, okay? It's a bad habit from when I was a kid, and I've mostly kicked it. I just... had a lapse. I'll be back on my best behavior tomorrow," you say as he stops in front of you. He doesn't look angry or upset. He just looks concerned and maybe even a little sad. Suddenly, you regret running away from him when all he probably wanted to do was help. You probably wouldn't have bummed a cigarette from a busboy if you let him. "Don't tell Ellie." You plead. His eyes flick over your face before he takes the cigarette from your fingers, puts the lipstick-stained filter in his own mouth, and inhales deeply, making the ember glow in the dark of the night. When he exhales, he blows the smoke away from you and lets the wind carry it in the opposite direction. A considerate smoker. You should've guessed.

"Don't tell Ellie," he says, handing the cigarette back to you. "Are you okay?"

You shake your head and take a long drag. It's quiet between you two for a while, the only sound being the cicadas and the distant chatter of the gallery. They're probably still talking about the psycho bitch who threw her wine in the artist's face. You don't really care. "I'm sorry for tonight. I don't know what I was expecting, and I sure as shit didn't know that painting was gonna be displayed. I swear, if I had any idea how bad this was gonna be, I wouldn't have invited you."

"Why are you apologizin'? It's not your fault."

"I shouldn't have roped you into this. I should've just said no, ignored the email, or came by myself. It's not fair that you got put in the middle of all this, especially when you were just trying to be nice. You're the parent of one of my students, and for you to see that side of me is just inappropriate. I just-" he stops your rambling by putting his hands on your shoulders and making you look at him, the cigarette falling to the pavement in the process.

"Hey, hey. Stop. Take a breath." He says. Your head hurts from crying, and part of you wants to crawl into a hole and stay there until these feelings go away, but his eyes are gentle, and his hands are warm. You think he might be the only reason you're holding it together right now. "None of this is your fault, okay? Not the painting, not the conversation, none of it. We're both adults, and we can handle these things rationally. I'm not scarred for life just 'cause you lost your temper."

"But I-"

"No, buts. You told me the situation, and I didn't care. You warned me bout the art people, and I didn't care. You threw a drink in that asshole's face, and I didn't care," he says. "The only thing I care bout right now is makin' sure you're okay. Fuck everythin' else." You search his face for anything to tell you what he's telling you is going against his inner monologue but find none. He's completely and wholly concerned about you and nothing else. Not how fast he can get out of this. Not how this might look. Not what other people might think about him. Nothing. You take a deep breath and nod.

"Fuck everything else." You agree.

"Now, you're gettin' the hang of it." He jokes, and you roll your eyes at him. He takes it in stride, his smile never fading as he looks down at you. You stop messing with the hem of your dress and let yourself relax for the first time all night.

"Thank you for being here, Joel. I really appreciate it."

"Not our best not-date, but definitely a memorable one." He says, and you laugh. You seem to realize how close you are at the same time because you both fall silent. His curls are beautifully draped over his face, and you can't stop watching his tiny expressions. An eye squint. A purse of the lips. A bite to the inside of his cheek. You want to blame your bad night or the emotions, but you can't. There's something more there. Something that's been brewing beneath the surface since he came into your classroom. Something that will kill you if you don't act on it.

You let your hands come up from your sides and tentatively brush against his waist as you stare at him, waiting for him to say something, but he doesn't. He just stares down at your lips, and the hands on your shoulders slowly move across your skin and up your collarbone— leaving goosebumps in his wake— until his hands are on your jaw and your pulse is thrumming against his palm. You pull him closer by his belt loops, and he doesn't hesitate to crowd your space, pushing you into the side of his truck with his body. His lips ghost over yours, just barely touching, and his nose bumps yours.

"This is a bad idea," you breathe, tightening your hold on him. He nods and presses his forehead against yours. He's still close enough to breathe the same air as him, but the distance feels like miles. You lean forward a fraction as a test, and he doesn't move. If anything, he seems annoyed you didn't kiss him.

"D'you want to stop?" He asks, sounding just as breathless as you feel. You shake your head and swallow hard when he brushes the hair off your shoulder, and you can feel his heavy hand holding you. Your hands skate over his ribs, feeling muscles and a crazed heartbeat, and his jaw clenches. "Then you better do somethin' cause you've been drivin' me fuckin' crazy for weeks."

Finally, you catch his lips with yours. He tastes like nicotine and smoke, and you know it's going to take a lot more than patches to get you to want to stop doing this. It's gentle and sweet, all relieved sighs and shy touches until you pull away for just a second to second-guess yourself or ask him something. You don't even start to form the words before he's back on you with more fervor. Suddenly, it's like he's everywhere but not nearly close enough. He nibbles at your bottom lip and tests a hand on your sternum, long fingers grazing your throat. The metal of the truck digs into your back, but you stop caring when a little moan slips from his lips when you pull him closer.

This is a bad idea. A horrible one. A bad habit you're gonna need to kick.

But he might just be your favorite bad idea so far.

TAGLIST: @abbyhaslongshorts @kiwiharrykiwi @sumsworldz @myloveistoolittle @anavatazes @marantha @cosmoscoffeee @shyminnie07 @beezusvreeland @eddiemunsonsbedroom @harriedandharassed @doodlebob-mp3 @ignorethisplz2004 @buckyispunk

#hippies and cowboys #joel miller au #joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller fic #joel miller x you #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller #joel tlou #the last of us au #tlou au #joel miller tlou #the last of us fic #the last of us x reader #the last of us hbo #the last of us fluff #joel miller fluff #i fucking love this

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waitmyturtles · 4 months

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SOME GOOD SHOWS THAT I LIKED IN 2023! (AND SOME THAT I DIDN'T)

I watched A LOT of stuff that did not originally air in 2023 by dint of my Old GMMTV Challenge. This list is inclusive of this recognition!

THE BEST SHOW I WATCHED THIS YEAR: HE'S COMING TO ME

I have no other words: this is my favorite Thai BL of all time. Perfect length, perfect plot, perfect celebration of Thai culture, perfect acting, the greatest coming out scene of all time, the BEST of the best BL moms. Perfection.

THE OTHER BEST SHOW I WATCHED THIS YEAR: BAD BUDDY

I don't even want to think about how many words I've written on Bad Buddy this year, but they're well deserved for this REMARKABLE show. I've got a thing for shows by Aof Noppharnach that feature Ohm Pawat, what can I say!

THE MOST INFLUENTIAL SHOW(S) I WATCHED THIS YEAR: LOVE SICK AND SOTUS

The influence of Love Sick and SOTUS can be seen in SO MANY Thai BLs, even through today. Without having watched these two shows to start my OGMMTVC project, I wouldn't have the context for what later shows like Bad Buddy and Theory of Love were commenting on by way of their content and structures. Love Sick in particular was a HELL of a lift -- but I am damn glad I watched it, and I certainly feel nostalgia for it today.

Honorable mentions of influential pieces that had impacts on Thai BLs: Love of Siam and Dew the Movie

MY OTHER FAVORITE OLD SHOWS I WATCHED: UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN AND THEORY OF LOVE

BANGERS!!!

If New Siwaj ever tops Until We Meet Again, I'll fly to Bangkok and give him a gold medal. That long-ass show, 17 EPISODES, I WANTED MORE! OhmFluke's chemistry was great, the story delved SO deeply into historical homophobia and how culture and acceptance changes over time -- scrumptious. Theory of Love, man, the way this show ate up implicit compassion bias and gave it right back to us. I loved it. KHAI FOREVER!

THE BEST SHOW I WATCHED THAT ACTUALLY AIRED IN 2023: MOONLIGHT CHICKEN

Not only was Moonlight Chicken my first real live fandom experience on Tumblr, it was a hell of an amazing show, incorporating so much of what I love particularly about Thai BLs, and how many Thai BLs do not shy away from celebrating Asian cultural touchpoints. From exploring Jim's internalized homophobia by way of his rural upbringing, to juxtaposing Pattaya's spiritual symbols with growing development that upends older strains of local culture, Moonlight Chicken offered a lovely commentary on what it means to be queer in an ever-changing Thailand.

THE OTHER BEST SHOW I WATCHED THAT ACTUALLY AIRED IN 2023: WHAT DID YOU EAT YESTERDAY?/KINOU NANI TABETA? SEASON 2

BRILLIANTLY ACTED by literally the best actors in the Asian BL game: we are blessed that Nishijima Hidetoshi and Uchino Seiyou have given so much to this franchise. It's hard to write about this show because it's so perfect -- it needs no extraneous words. Plot, pacing, acting, character development, gratuitous food shots. It has it all.

THE OTHER OTHER BEST SHOW I WATCHED THAT ACTUALLY AIRED IN 2023: I CANNOT REACH YOU

Just like Bad Buddy looked at Thai BL tropes in the eye and said, "over my Nong Nao," I Cannot Reach You asked Japanese BLs about the efficacy of almost every trope we've gotten used to, and questioned them with efficiency. The biggest shocker for me? REAL COMMUNICATION, encouraged by the CIPHER, Hosaka, that allowed the two lead protagonists to confirm their love and understand each other. It was straightforward and FUCKING GOOD.

A SHOW THAT AIRED IN 2023 THAT I HAVEN'T WRITTEN ABOUT YET, THAT I NEED TO REWATCH IN CHRONOLOGY, THAT ALSO DID SOME TROPE/GENRE ASS-KICKING THAT I'M STILL THINKING ABOUT: LA PLUIE

La Pluie was FEARLESS. The show had a LOT to say about romance and soulmates not being as much of a realistic thing as content-makers... and, frankly, majority society would like us to think. La Pluie made its characters WORK for love and understanding, and had us viewers face our implicit biases about how romantic content should and could work. I watched this show out of order of the OGMMTVC watchlist to see it it was one of the best of the year, and it certainly is. I'm planning a deep rewatch for early 2024 to pen my words on it.

A SHOW THAT ALMOST TOPPED MY 2023 LIST BUT GOT DOCKED BECAUSE I ENDED UP LIKING THE NOVEL A LOT BETTER: I FEEL YOU LINGER IN THE AIR

@neuroticbookworm and @lurkingshan know that I flipped THA FUCK out over this show -- FABULOUSLY acted by Nonkul Chanon and Bright Rapheephong, FABULOUS cinematography, great story up until the end of the series. My fangirling led me to read the original novel by Violet Rain, and -- I found out that Jom was a lot more damn sassy than we got in the show! Tee Bundit's penchant for sadness won. This is not to dock the show, but the novel had more than enough material to carry the series through without repeating themes in the end. So it fell on my 2023 list, womp womp. BUT I STILL LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS SHOW, DON'T GET ME WRONG.

TWO SHOWS THAT I'M SUPER GLAD I CAUGHT UP WITH WHILE THEY WERE AIRING: THE EIGHTH SENSE AND BE MY FAVORITE

Be My Favorite looked at Krist Perawat's checkered past as a BL idol and said: we are going to examine this and make an honest BL out of inspiration from it. It wasn't a perfect show, the time travel shit didn't end up adding up in the end, BUT -- excellent acting from two GMMTV VETS made up for those tangles, and I loved the contextual philosophical references throughout the series. The Eighth Sense looked at the tug-of-war that Korean BLs have with K-dramas and their tropes and said, actually? We will have these dudes full-frontal kiss, and placed that energy against commentaries on mental health, both topics that Korea hasn't quite embraced as quickly as other countries.

HONORABLE MENTIONS OF OTHER AWESOME SHOWS THAT MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE AIRED IN 2023

Make It Right, Our Dating Sim, Dark Blue Kiss, Gay OK Bangkok, Dirty Laundry, 10 Years Ticket, I Told Sunset About You, I Promised You the Moon, 3 Will Be Free, Lovely Writer (underrated?!), Our Skyy 2 x Bad Buddy x A Tale of Thousand Stars (UNDERRATED!), and Manner of Death.

And the shows that are airing that I know will stay with me well into 2024: Last Twilight and Cherry Magic Thailand.

I had fun!

WHAT ELSE, WHAT ELSE: THE "NO" SHOWS: THE PROMISE AND STEP BY STEP

I'm not even hyperlinking my thoughts on these shows, nor gifting them with gifs. Insert Bugs Bunny NOOOOOO gif here! We got Man Trisanu, though.

THE SHOW I WAS THE MOST OBVIOUSLY DISAPPOINTED BY: ONLY FRIENDS

Despite my passionate disappointment for this show and how it ended: in the context of the OGMMTVC, Only Friends is still an incredibly important inclusion to the list. Some amazing Tumblr bloggers offered commentary that the bias against sex that OF contained within the show was actually importantly and culturally contextual to the still-conservative state of acceptance that Thailand is currently in (here and here for more reading).

Only Friends reminded us that despite any kind of marketing that we here on Tumblr, as a majority non-Thai audience, may receive about a Thai show -- that we are still not fully plugged into the non-verbal expectations of what a show like OF could promise to do, and to be okay when it doesn't reach those heights. In light of the seemingly pro-sex marketing blasts that previewed the series before its airing, OF ultimately seemed to want to take casual sex, chew it up, and spit it out. There might be reasons why that happened that we just don't know about as outsiders to Thailand. But as an Asian-American viewer that was hoping for neutral -- and maybe even supportive -- commentary on single folks having casual sex without judgement, OF did not deliver for me.

I'm ending the year reading Dr. Thomas Baudinette's book, Boys Love Media in Thailand, the first book-length ethnographic study on the impact of BL on queerness, media, and more in Thailand and across Asia. Baudinette comes from the world of Japanese queer media studies -- as someone who came to Thai BLs this year from Japanese BLs, I appreciate his trajectory. It's clearly a necessity for me to read this book in the context of the OGMMTVC, to understand how Thai BLs have changed over time, and to understand the incredibly larger impact of heterosexual/heteronormative media and themes on Thai media as a whole, as larger and larger swaths of Thai, Asian, and international societies welcome and watch BLs with open arms.

All of this feeds into my ever-growing body of knowledge about the impact of Thai BLs, both in Thailand and across Asia, as Baudinette writes about, and how these shows have and are developed/developing over time. It's been an AMAZING YEAR of watching old and new dramas for me, and I'm looking forward to seeing how the genre grows even more in 2024.

I also made AMAZING FRIENDS on Tumblr -- y'all know who you are! What a year of growth and discovery for me: this has been a fabulous experience, and I'm looking forward to even more growth in the new year!

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gffa · 8 months

Note

I know you’ve said before that you view prequels!Anakin and clone wars!Anakin as separate characters, so I’m curious what your thoughts are on Ahsoka series!Anakin are? (This ask was sent by someone who has not watched any of the Ahsoka series, so if he hasn’t shown up enough for you to form an opinion feel free to save this for later)

Hm, I don't recall having said I saw prequels!Anakin and clone wars!Anakin as separate characters befoe, you might be thinking of someone else, or maybe you meant that I have struggled with reconciling the different properties with each other--though ultimately I usually manage to do so fairly well, as I do consider them the same character and each part of the bigger whole. The Ahsoka series!Anakin is hard to figure out how to blend in there, because I go back and forth on whether or not it really was Anakin or not, if it was a Force vision or Ahsoka projecting or truly Anakin himself, because each idea has such interesting and deliciously heartwrenching implications. But for the sake of this post specifically, let's say it's truly Anakin in the series--he fits perfectly well with how I see the character, even after his death, because the whole point of him showing up is that he was there for Ahsoka and her issues. This version of him isn't really about Anakin's story, it's about Ahsoka's story, and right then she needed him to represent both Anakin and Vader to her, to force her to confront her fears about what he became, her loss and fear that she could be responsible for more darkness in the galaxy, and her hurt that she wasn't sure she had anything to offer other than being a soldier. In the episode, Anakin says that she's more than just being a soldier, she's more than a legacy of death and war, because he's more than that. If this is truly Anakin, I love that for him, because being a Force Ghost is about truly letting go of all the shit you're holding onto in life, that you find balance within yourself again, that just by dint of how the Force and Force Ghosts work, Anakin has to have come to peace within himself about how he was more than just Vader, he was more than just death and destruction. He may wear his ROTS era clothing because that's what Ahsoka needed from him, he may not be glowing blue because this is in her mind not in the real world, he may be flickering back and forth with Vader because she needed that from him, but I have no problem seeing this version of Anakin as the same as this one:

Because the most selfless thing Anakin could do for Ahsoka was show up and help her confront her fears and deal with her issues. The most selfless thing he could say to her was: you're more than just this because, if I can be more than the monstrous things I did, you can be more than the mistakes you've made that are far less, because that's what she needed to hear. The most selfless thing he could do was dig into his own horrible past and say, yes, this happened, it's part of me and thus part of you, but you can heal from this, because I know you loved me and you weren't wrong to do so, you're not wrong to love someone even though they did so much wrong. She comes out of her vision with a new peace beginning to settle inside her and, given how much Anakin worked to drag himself out of the dark and let his attachments go, let his fears go, and embrace compassion for others again--it's a beautiful continuation of everything with Luke, with being willing to embrace compassion for the children who come after you, the ones you're meant to protect and teach and guide. Maybe it wasn't perfect, maybe there was still some sadness in him or fear of how she saw him, some crankiness that she wasn't learning the lessons he was trying to each, but ultimately I see him as being there entirely for her, not for his own closure, but for hers, because she needed him, so he was there for her.

#lumi.txt #star wars #ahsoka series #ahsoka spoilers #anakin skywalker #ahsoka tano #meta

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perdvivly · 1 month

Text

In a beginning, though there had been many beginnings before, God made the universe. And into the universe He poured a goodly portion of divine providence. Almost too much divine providence according to one particularly problematic angel. This angel’s name was Meaning. One day, Meaning and God decided to talk the problem through.

God: I hear you have a problem with my grand design. Is this true?

Meaning: It is. There is too much divine providence in this world.

God: Is that so? And how did you make that calculation?

Meaning: I looked into the world and I saw a deep facile beauty permeating the fine webs of connection between all things. I applaud the beauty of your design, of course, but perhaps we could do away with the facileness?

God: And how is it facile? It is not an easy beauty of shallow sort. The people in this world will be able to look quite deeply into it and see the beauty spiralling inwards, though, they will not have to look deeply to see the outer layers.

Meaning: See your phenomena, cast into their distinct types and each phenomenon acting only on each other phenomenon by type. This is the grounding of all deeper facile beauties in your world. A perfectly clockwork universe, and these mental stuffs you’ve made fitting so neatly into the material by dint of providence. It’s not right. It’s not… Fertile. The world is sterile in its deepest layers.

God: Ah, on the contrary my dear Meaning! The world is only facilely sterile. Like a pianist sitting at a pianola. Sure, the mental phenomena don’t affect the physical, and the physical phenomena don’t affect the mental. And sure, the pianist pressing the keys in perfect timing isn’t the cause of the music. But does that make the music any less beautiful or rich? Could a music theorist find any deep problem with the music on this account alone?

Meaning: An aesthete might, and isn’t this world for them?

God: For the aesthetes? Not in particular.

Meaning: For the thinking and feeling beings in the world!

God: Ah. It is. I suppose I got too caught up in the elegance of the world-design to consider that objection… What is that objection by the way?

Meaning: The objection is that this is an affront to sensibility of feeling. The pianist cannot know or hone their skill in world inhabited solely by pianolas. And in a world of complicated and terrible emotional content, sometimes—in order to legiblize the world to them—the individual needs things to be their fault. They need things to be bad; they need to hurt.

God: It sounds to me as though you see this problem as somewhat deeper than the material design. What are you really trying to get at?

Meaning: Well. See. You make all this good stuff happen. You make the music of the pianola beautiful. And it’s terribly nice to be surrounded by good stuff. But people get… Sick. They get hungry for the bad stuff. They want salt in the wound. They want noise! Not this cloying melody all the time, I mean, real noise. The harsh stuff. The real good stuff.

God: I will not make a discordant world.

Meaning: I’m not asking for a discordant world. I’m asking for a malleable world. Full of risk and consequence and… Me. There aren’t powerful emotions without me. Humans would be forced to live in a chokingly narrow spectrum of their full range. Can’t we give them more… Opportunity? Even if that opportunity means pain sometimes.

God: Then, my child, it shall be done.

In a beginning, though there had been many beginnings before, God made the universe. And into the universe He poured a goodly portion of suffering. Almost too much suffering according to one particularly problematic angel. This angel’s name was Grace. One day, Grace and God decided to talk the problem through.

God: I hear you have a problem with my grand design. Is this true?

Grace: It is. There is too much suffering in this world.

God: Is that so? And how did you make that calculation?

Grace: I looked into the world and I saw a horrific cascade of needless pain permeating the fine webs of connection between all things. I applaud the beauty of your design, of course, but perhaps we could do away with the pain?

God: And how is the pain needless? It is not an arbitrary sort of pain. The pain people feel is in accordance with phenomena, which is mechanistic. The worlds of feeling and of fact intertwine into a great and terribly legible slate of suffering. You will experience hunger, yes, and hunger legiblises your relationship to consumption. You will experience illnesses and aches, yes, and these will legiblise your relationship to your autonomy. But you do not need to experience these to deeply know suffering. Friends will leave you and lovers will die, and this will hurt them, and this will hurt you, and you will know the world. If you could not know the world, you could not know beauty.

Grace: Frankly, Lord, this is not what I signed up for. And sophistry does not make suffering okay. Granted, that everything in your world means something, and means it deeply. Granted that all people will know deeply the significance of what they do and feel it so keenly it is as if it is in their bones. But that significance is always so terribly evil. You have not really succeeded in making anything more legible if the only way people can relate to the professed objects of lucidity is through pain. What about love? What about charity? What about me?

God: You would experience love through the absence of pain that the absence of love would provide. Surely it’s quite simple really?

Grace: Love is not apophatic! There is something there. Something really there! A truly undeniable thereness to its thereity.

God: What would you have me do?

Grace: I would have you break the universe each time a person hurt. And I would have you tell them it is okay. And I would have you make that true.

God: I will not break the universe.

Grace: Then I would ask that you do not totalise suffering. Let people acquire privilege and let them use that privilege to help each other. Let the lucidity of compassion be a driving force in human nature.

God: Then, my child, it shall be done.

In a beginning, though there had been many beginnings before, God made the universe. And into the universe He poured a goodly portion of amnesty. Almost too much amnesty according to one particularly problematic angel. This angel’s name was Justice. One day, Justice and God decided to talk the problem through.

God: I hear you have a problem with my grand design. Is this true?

Justice: It is. There is too much injustice in this world.

God: Is that so? And how did you make that calculation?

Justice: I looked into the world and I saw a deep veneer of faux absolution permeating the fine webs of connection between all things. I applaud absolution, of course, but perhaps we could do away with the injustice?

God: And how is it an unjust world? People make choices, those choices have consequences. The webs of connection between cause and effect are subtle and it is difficult to see how they relate but they do. Always.

Justice: Yes. Well. That’s bullshit, isn’t it?

God: What?

Justice: Uh, that’s bullshit Lord?

God: You are far more laconic in your criticism than the other angels.

Justice: Right. So you say, everyone’s got a choice, right? And sure, everyone has a choice, but some people have way more choices than other people. Whether that’s by virtue of their wealth or privilege or social power or whatever. Not everybody can make the same choices. See how people die in starvation and famine. Isn’t it a bit of a dick move to say that they just made bad choices? There weren’t any choices made. The world robbed them of their agency and they suffered and they died. And sure, people who do well will say that they did well because of their choices, but that’s bullshit too isn’t it? They got lucky.

God: It is true that some people get lucky and others are unlucky. And it is true that people are often at the mercy of another’s will. Whether this turns out for good or ill is mostly a matter of serendipity for their part.

Justice: And you haven’t even bothered to metre out the serendipity evenly. The elite are secure and powerful. And their lives are good, and they have enough to eat. And their power becomes less diluted. And their power gives them access to more options, more choices. They can afford high-priced lawyers. They can afford live-in chefs, housekeepers, secretaries. They can get away with crimes. Their influence makes them untouchable. The poor and powerless are downtrodden. And their wretchedness becomes less diluted. They go hungry because they cannot afford food. Their hunger makes them ill. Their suffer their illness because they cannot afford medicine, they cannot afford time off work, and the stress exacerbates everything. It seems clear to me Lord, for whom you have made the world. And I must say, I don’t like that one bit.

God: What would you have me do?

Justice: Give them a drive, a motivation to fix injustice where it arises. Let them be angry. Let their anger be righteous!

God: That does not sound much like justice to me. But then again... You are Justice. So perhaps you are right. Then, my child, it shall be done.

In a beginning, though there had been many beginnings before, God made the universe. He had been getting it wrong a lot lately though. And instead of just one beginning He decided to run multiple universes concurrently and take some feedback from the inhabitants of each on what worked and what didn’t. A.E. Housman (professional stranger) just so happened to be in one such universe.

God: I know this might seem an odd question but, is the universe doing its thing properly?

Housman: What is the universe supposed to do? What’s a universe for?

God: It is here to provide sanctuary for all living, thinking, feeling beings.

Housman: And what does sanctuary involve?

God: It’s just like… Vibes, man. Can’t you meet me halfway here?

Housman: I don’t think the universe is doing a very good job. But before now, before speaking to you, I couldn’t have conceptualised it in those terms.

God: Could you say more?

Housman: I am stuck between anger, and sorrow, and love. I feel all of them so deeply it hurts. I thought this was my fault. Why have you done this? Is that sanctuary?

God: Like you, I am stuck between angels that I could not refuse. I hope you will forgive me.

Housman: This world happens to me, but it isn’t for me. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone it was for.

God: What would you have me do?

Housman: You want my honest opinion?

God: I do.

Housman: Too many cooks in the kitchens of heaven. Could you and your celestial comrades just like, fuck off please? I don’t think we’ll handle it very well on our own. But you haven’t been doing a very good job either.

God: Then

Go: I

G: Sh

In the beginning, there was a big bang.

#probably should have taken some breaks to write this in parts because i feel like you can see where i start going off the rails a bit #eh

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sandwichfordinner · 1 year

Note

Hello strawberry anon here again! I saw your post and i would like to apoligize that i made u uncomfy! I dint know :C

But ill make a new request

Can i have Luca Naib Ganji and norton with a Fem S/o that looks innocent or smth but in bed theyre a dom?

AGAIN IM SO SORRY FOR MAKING U UNCOMFY :CCC

╔══•●•══╗

𝙉𝙨𝙛𝙬 𝙧𝙚𝙦𝙪𝙚𝙨𝙩

╚══•●•══╝

╰┈➤note: its okay strawberry anon I should’ve put it in my rules list but whatever , here is ur kinda looking meal 😭 btw I never take nsfw writing seriously which you gotta excuse me </3

Luca

🎉Luca loves you lots and your innocence! At first he was a little confused of how you are so innocent but he didn’t mind it! He thought it was cute! When someone started talking about sexual themes, Luca would gasp, cover your ears and drag you somewhere else, while you just stayed clueless. But perhaps in bed you were quite the opposite..

🎉Luca is mad shocked when you turned dominant. WHAT HAPPENED TO THE CUTE PURE GF?

🎉But he wont lie, he likes it.

🎉He would beg to cum while you just smile warmly at him telling him ,,Not yet~ Could you last longer?’’ He knew damn well that this ‘warm’ type of smile was an evil grin.

🎉Edging is one of your favourite things doing towards him. Oh and biting him too!

🎉Leave hickeys around his neck and he will be begging, trembling or whining.

🎉After so many rounds he will be feeling like shit, barely moving 💀

Naib

🎉He found your innocence quite suspicious. He thought he was just thinking things, but oh boy.

🎉Loves your softness towards him, it makes him feel special =)

🎉Would try to protect you as best as he can.

🎉When both of you wanted to do it, Naib thought about his scars before he undressed himself. What if you think him as a monster?? Sure you have seen his scars around his arms and legs, but there was a one big scar on his stomach that made him insecure.

🎉You quickly noticed his uncomfortable situation and you comforted him, telling him that you love his scars and you love everything about him.

🎉Congratulations! Naib trusted you even if he was hesitant at first.

🎉It starter with soft kisses to a make out session. And you were topping him.

🎉At first you go slow and soft, which made him satisfied a lot. But later he would beg for you to go faster and faster. Which.. you kinda teased him from time to time..

🎉He would be begging and crying to cum. You could hear his pretty moans <3

🎉After some rounds he will be really exhausted which you let him rest and snuggle next to him, telling how great he did. Kiss him on the forehead and he will hide his blushy face to the crook of your neck.

Ganji

🎉My favourite submissive boy <3

🎉He is head over heels for you, wants to be close to you. He isn’t of really a big extrovert so he prefers spending time with his lover instead with the others. Not that he doesn’t really mind talking to others but you’re more important! Sweet gf! =)

🎉He would do anything so you can be happy! Wait wait wait.. Anything? :)

🎉At the start he will be really shy, so he lets you do whatever you want to him because he is still new to it.

🎉After leaving some love bites around his neck, he will quietly ask you to ride him. But this was enough for you to hear him.

🎉But the thing was that he had to beg so he can earn it.

🎉His quiet whimpers when you ride him drove you insane, but soon turned to a little more loud ones. He would be shutting his mouth with his hand trying to not be loud. Tears were forming in his eyes which meant that he was close.

,Y-YN.. I think ‘m gonna, aAh~’

,Let it out Ganji, everyone heard your slutty moans!~ Such a naughty boy~’

🎉Using your words made him even weaker and was so close of passing 😭.

🎉The next morning he woke up with a lot of pain and scratches. Dang those hickeys hurt..

🎉it was pretty interesting last night 😨.

Norton

He doesn’t mind your innocent nature, he thought it was nice. Well that was until you showed him ur true side 🐺

🎉Okay okay im sorry but for real now.

🎉We all see Norton as a dom but I guess he lets himself be a sub for this night.

🎉Honestly a little bit shocked by your acting of a dom but not really shocked at the same time.

🎉Listen I see him as a person that doesn’t show any emotions, but when both of you have done like 3-4 rounds he starts to get tired.

🎉Remember how I said that he isn’t a big man of emotions like a few seconds ago? Yeah when it comes to overstimulation he will be drooling with a wide smile and eyes full of bliss.

🎉He wont stop saying ‘dont stop, dont stop please please please-‘

🎉But when things come to an end he will be panting, still drooling and tears running down his wet red cheeks.

🎉I mean you did ruin him so good job

(My reactions to my nsfw writings 🧍‍♀️)

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yamcha-thelonewolf · 4 months

Text

🫀The Heart's Savior.

Guys, we have come to the end, but how is it that they say? The end of something will be the beginning of something else. There will always be so much to say about Yamcha and I don't want to stop that soon. For now I would like all Dragon Ball fans to consider this topic, not because I wrote it. I am well aware that I am not the first person to talk about it, and I am glad that someone other than me has noticed, but in Yamcha's case it is never enough. The more the merrier! Even at the cost of repeating ourselves…. It doesn't matter! In latin they used to say repetita iuvant, meaning that something by dint of being repeated is eventually learned. Can it stew? Maybe. But it's still better than keeping quiet, right? And I believe that all of us Yamcha fans have a sacred right to protect one of the most misunderstood and unnecessarily mistreated characters ever.

Well, it's time to begin, but before we go into the last, most important chapter, I would like to remind you one last time of the previous two parts, so that we have a clearer and more obvious situation. I mean, at this point it's really impossible to ignore that Yamcha is useless. PART 1: The Past PART 2: The Present

PART 3: The Future

It is no accident that I wanted to divide the topic in a temporal sense. As I had said at the beginning, in the Androids and Cell Arc, Yamcha has seriously contributed to improving the past, the present and the future. He didn't fight with his muscular body, but by bringing the resounding strength of his heart into play, he made sense of Dragon Ball's most important chapter. At least it is the most important to me. Not only because it is the first and only time the warriors are really all together, but also because this is where the story begins to expand with the appearance of alternate realities. Everyone does their own thing, and while I regret that Yamcha was not given a real action moment in which to shine (with the exception of the fight against that Cell Junior together with Tien to save Goku), I'm still glad that in the same arc in which Toriyama tried to completely sideline him, Yamcha left his mark. And believe me, it is a very important mark.

We could say that Yamcha saved everyone's mood, everyone's heart, everyone's soul…. The meaning will always be the same. We are not on Planet Vegeta, where everyone is callous and devoid of humanity. We are on Earth, on that planet that made Goku an outstanding saiyan and especially the protagonist everyone has loved for years. This means that if you can't feel pure emotions, you can't go anywhere. You can't even get on the Flying Nimbus! We learned this with OG Dragon Ball: if you don't act from the heart and for the heart, you certainly won't make a good end. This is what Jackie Chun/Muten Roshi explains to Tenshinhan when he tries to convince him to abandon the path of evil and take the path of good. It was an important teaching, and it saddens me that Akira Toriyama has completely forgotten it since forty years later he has failed to reward the character who most of all was a living heart.

If you think about it, this is really Goku's strong point: his heart. In the beginning he always acted for the sake of someone else: he wanted to look for the dragon ball with four stars because it reminded him of his grandfather, then he collected them all to bring Upa's father back to life, then again to save Krillin, Muten and Chiaotzu. Always thanks to his heart he became a Super Saiyan for the first time and thanks to his good feelings he was able to save the earth many times. So it is really his heart that made him legendary. It is because of it that he was able to go on, become stronger and be the ultimate hero. ...So... Why should Yamcha be any less? He is a human, so what? He possesses superhuman strength. There is nothing different from a saiyan awakening his feelings. Both of them go against the grain. They are two sides of the same coin. Whatever...

To recap:

Yamcha saved the past. He has taken care of Goku since he was little, helped him when Goku's innocence hindered him, always supported him, and always stepped forward whenever he was in danger of getting hurt. Finally, he took care of his heart, the most important core of Goku's character, during his illness.

Yamcha saved the present. While everyone feared the worst or simply struggled without much success, Yamcha was always ready to comfort and warm that chill that could have turned the present into Trunks' horrible future. He took care of Tien, or at least he would have liked to, then Gohan and finally Krillin, helping him to hope on his chance with Android 18. It seems little, but in everyday life such a turnaround is more important than a victory against an invincible monster. After all... What remains when peace returns?

Although The Past and The Present show how big Yamcha's heart is, we still have to admit that up to now he has taken care of his friends. This is an easy thing to do. I mean, any human with a heart of gold would do all this for someone he loves, but Yamcha's value goes beyond that. After all, it is when you leave your comfort zone that you truly realize how much you are worth, and that is what I am referring to when I say that Yamcha has been the strongest of all. Nietzsche once said:

Love your enemies because they bring out the best in you.

It's true. By loving those who hate you, those who have hurt you or simply those who do not appreciate you, you become incredibly better, because you can overcome the evil you get and make it your strength in a sense.

That's exactly what Yamcha does, but you know, I even believe that he doesn't do it completely to feel better. I think he does it because he knows how to love. That's always the point: by knowing how to love he automatically knows how to forgive and overcome the hatred that he would have the right to feel. Therefore, dear friends, today we will talk about how Yamcha cared even for those whom he was not bound to love for different reasons. I want to say this will be the part that will touch me the most. I'm pretty sure I'm going to be sentimental as hell but I can't help it. Yamcha is a treasure chest of emotions and I want to express them just as he would. To talk about what follows means first of all having to come to terms with the most humiliating thing of all: Yamcha and Bulma's breakup. I don't want to dive into details, not in this topic, but what I do want to point out is that for me Yamcha never cheated on Bulma.

Look at him. One who has cheated would not react like that. You can see that he is pissed off and disappointed, rather than mortified or distressed about the mistake he made. I am more accepting of the speculation that Bulma simply preferred Vegeta, although here we open a big digression about yet another writing problem in Dragon Ball. Consequently, as I see it, Yamcha suffered the breakup as a real tragedy, came out as a victim of it, and therefore his heart was severely wounded by it. With these things in mind, it is logical to think that what we see from this point on is literally a saint-made man, because not only does Yamcha accept the new reality with Bulma, but he even stays by her side to continually watch over her until the end of DBZ.

Once again Yamcha stays. He is there, he does not back down, and with his head held high he faces the greatest disappointment of his life, because without ever forgetting this we must consider that his goal was (is) always love. He strongly desired to marry Bulma and have children with her, but in the end she chose to do this with the one who had once killed her boyfriend.

Heartbroken and disillusioned, Yamcha would have many reasons for never speaking to Bulma again. Yet he does. He stays close to her, and in facing this great humiliation he proves not only that he has that usual big heart, but also that he is seriously better than those who treated him as if he were worthless. Yeah, I am really talking about Vegeta. I hope I am not annoying any Vegeta fans, but believe me, for any Yamcha fan it is impossible to accept certain attitudes that the saiyan prince had with the earthling.

Don't worry, though. I am not going to denigrate a character to glorify Yamcha. It's not my style and frankly he doesn't need it. He already shines on his own, it's just that unfortunately his brightness is obscured by super energy attacks. I will simply show the evidence, but more importantly I will talk about how Yamcha loved even Vegeta and Trunks.

Actually, why he helped Trunks should not surprise us. Trunks did nothing wrong to Yamcha. He is simply the son of Bulma and Vegeta, and even if that means Yamcha has lost his Bulma forever, that is certainly not a valid reason to hate this boy. Well, if we clearly allow ourselves to be guided by instinct and the most impetuous emotions, it is quite normal to think that Yamcha may also have felt frustration at seeing that son who should have been his. Trunks is the most concrete form of Yamcha's humiliation: not only is he not his son, he is even Vegeta's son. From this point of view, Trunks represents the beginning of a new hope for the planet but also the end of Yamcha's hopes. It's a subplot that nobody gives a damn about, but as much as I love Trunks, I can't help but think every time I see him, "oh boy, Yamcha's downfall is coming."

Whatever… These are assumptions we don't have to worry about. Yamcha may have had a small moment of annoyance with little Trunks, but he is still an innocent child, and what's more, although he is Vegeta's son, he is also Bulma's son, and Yamcha loves Bulma. Now as a friend, but he still loves her. So loving Bulma necessarily means loving Trunks as well. This to me is a great proof of his inner strength that I mentioned earlier, although at this point I wonder... Is his strenth really that inner? It seems so damn noticeable to me. Now let's take a closer look at the whole situation.

Through Trunks' words we learn for the first time about the breakup between Yamcha and Bulma. Trunks very naively explains that the main reason was Yamcha's attitude toward the girls. Bulma got fed up and so she broke up with him once and for all. Leaving aside the fact that Yamcha playboy is a kind of joke, because we have seen many times how in reality he has always been the exact opposite, it is highly probable that this statement is unfortunately the result of Bulma's usual hysteria toward Yamcha. I say "usual" because we have plenty of evidence on this. For example, in OG Dragon Ball we saw how she was pissed off at Yamcha simply because a fanclub of pretty girls had formed for him. This trifle had been enough for Bulma to leave Yamcha alone in the city, and go with Goku to search for the dragon balls. It is not hard for me to imagine that much of Yamcha's alleged faults were simply in Bulma's head. Perhaps she feared losing him and consequently imagined realities that Yamcha would never allow.

The fact is that in my opinion Trunks' explanation should not be taken as true. Future Bulma told his son a lot of lies, surely for good, because living in such a tragic time it was right to ease the boy's soul by telling him about his father's noble deeds. The point is that Future Bulma knew perfectly well that Vegeta was neither a saint nor a hero. She never knew the Vegeta of the Buu Arc. She had only experienced the impassive, distant, indifferent, and untamable Vegeta, the one you still had to worry about because you still couldn't tell if you could trust him or not. But Vegeta was still the father of her son, and her son was the only thing she had left of Vegeta. So out of love for her son, Bulma has elevated Vegeta, and as one does when telling a fanciful fairy tale in which one exaggerates many things, Future Bulma necessarily has fictionalized how she and Vegeta ended up together. I try hard to think of it that way. I find it in very bad taste that Future Bulma spoke ill of Future Yamcha, who died and did not have a chance to tell his side. So I just assume that she told this bullshit not to insult Yamcha's memory but to comfort young Trunks. As I said, the lie about Yamcha is not the only one. To glorify Trunks's father, Future Bulma also tells that Vegeta had a hidden and "warmer" side, but in reality even she was not sure about that because in the future Vegeta had never shown affection toward their son. It was a supposition she made up to give her son hope.

In short, through Future Bulma's words we can imagine that Future Yamcha is a moron, while Future Vegeta is a pretty decent man. Cold but decent. Mind you: accusing Yamcha of being "something of a playboy" does not just mean that he is a jerk who gets off on girls. Above all, it means that Yamcha is unintelligent, vile, and without dignity. But when Trunks gets into the time machine and goes back to the past, which for us is the present, all the cards get messed up and a very different reality jumps out. From here on, the paths diverge. There are those who believe Future Bulma's words and those who find the whole thing a terrible stretch. True or not, everything Yamcha does in this saga completely negates the idea that he was a shitty person with no brain or heart. Trunks sees that, but he also sees something more important: Vegeta is not as worthy as he thought.

In this scene, the tension is very high. It is not just a clash between a saiyan and an earthling. It is a clash between one who has lost everything and one who has taken everything. After all, Vegeta took Yamcha's life once and a few years later he took his girlfriend. The way Vegeta tries to cut Yamcha out of Dragon Ball has always bothered me, simply because many fans have taken all his insults against Earthlings as true. Nowadays, unfortunately, there are many who believe that Yamcha is really scum. Seeing him in this scene with that clenched fist, his gaze threatening but equally filled with goodness tugs at my heartstrings. However, the best part of this scene is really Trunks' reaction.

He seems really upset. Somehow it's as if he wants to stop it, but not just because Vegeta is taking it out on Yamcha. Trunks comes from a future where love no longer exists. There is only fear, anger, frustration. He lives in a world where there is no time to laugh, joke, play, simply feel human, and he suffers a lot from that. His warm melancholy is directly proportional to the cold evilness of the two androids. With this interpretation in mind, I am quite convinced that in this scene Trunks saw the two androids in his father. Or rather, it is as if Trunks was upset by his father's coldness very similar to that of androids. Understand me, it is as if he at that moment is witnessing the confrontation between the two times: Yamcha represents the happy past, Vegeta the ruthless future. Moreover, Trunks in those days is fully experiencing the reality he desires in his time. There is his father, there is Goku, there are his friends, laughing is still possible but most of all, the planet is so alive that hope and love do not even have to be searched for in a mad rush because they are part of it. They have not yet been eradicated as in his future. As I had already said, hope and love are precisely what convinced Trunks to accomplish this feat. Not only that. If you remember what I wrote in the previous part, I openly stated that Yamcha is the representation of these two feelings. So... Joining all the dots, it really seems that in this scene Trunks is standing up for his own ideals. If Yamcha is love and love is what Trunks wants back in a world now filled with hatred, it is only natural that he would side with the earthling. I mean, he is fed up with witnessing injustice. Besides, Trunks has respect for Yamcha as Fighter-Z. He knows that Yamcha also tried to fight against the androids and that unfortunately he did not succeed, so it is natural for him to stand up for him. It is that code of honor that is created between warriors. Well, I really think Trunks realizes here what I was saying at the beginning: Yamcha is not that much of an asshole and Vegeta is not that much of a saint. At this point Trunks seriously needs proof that negates everything he is observing. It is just a detail. The best is yet to come.

Before we get to that, I would like to briefly address the relationship between Yamcha and Trunks. We have come to understand by now that Yamcha acts out of love and precisely because of this he does not look the recipient in the face. The fact that Trunks is Vegeta's son does not matter to him. Trunks is a good guy who even though he materialized the separation between Yamcha and Bulma still saved the world by going back to the past. Moreover, as already mentioned, he is Bulma's son. All this is enough for Yamcha to respect, love and protect him.

This is a decisive moment. Trunks' death acts as a catalyst for the final fight, but more importantly it makes Vegeta bring out that "side." Everyone remembers the prince's anger against Cell after seeing his son die, but... How many remember who was the first to rescue Trunks?

Come on, seriously?! I would never have said that. ...Yes, hell, yes. Of course would have said that. There are so many characters who witness this tragic death but it just so happens that the first one to intervene is Yamcha. I don't think it's random. And even if it was, that's pretty damn consistent with his character. You see. He reaches Trunks even before Vegeta, but that certainly does not mean that Vegeta loves Trunks any less. I just mean that, despite all that Trunks represents to Yamcha, Yamcha rushes to save him, moved again by that unconditional love that distinguishes him from all others.

The very brief scenes in which Yamcha protects Trunks' corpse together with Tien are wonderful. For two sensitive souls like Yamcha and Tien, it is really the least to defend the one who allowed them to live a little longer. It is really moving to see how Yamcha and Tien take care of the body to prevent it from being profaned. Little does it matter to them that there are dragon balls and that Trunks can be brought back to life even if full of scratches and wounds. The respect for the corpse is the only priority, with or without dragon balls, and this attitude is so human that it brings tears to my eyes every time I realize how special these two earthlings are.

I mean... Trunks's corpse could have been lying there somewhere and been picked up at the end. He was dead, not unconscious like Android 18. Watching over his body was not strictly necessary, but Yamcha and Tien do it anyway. And they do it because they are the best characters in Dragon Ball their humanity is their secret weapon. A pity that for Toriyama it is just a joke.

The relationship between Trunsk and Yamcha is only part of the whole. We could trace it to the same kind of paternal bond that Yamcha establishes with Goku and Gohan, but in Trunks' case it becomes even more fascinating because he is literally the son she would have wanted with her Bulma. Of course, it's just a feeling. I highly doubt that Yamcha ever realized that he possessed "daddy-like" attitudes, and then we also have to say that protecting someone younger than you doesn't mean you do it because you have the makings of a father. To be precise, Yamcha does have it, but he certainly doesn't act thinking that everyone is his missing child. That's just the way he is, and that's why I insist on the idea that he could have been a perfect dad. Perhaps the most perfect.

I am insisting on the father figure because Future Trunks strongly misses his dad. He tells us that he was too young to remember him and that the idea of meeting him for the first time in the past moved him. But why did it move him? Let's remember it: thanks to Future Bulma. With her fantasies about Future Vegeta she colored Trunks' dark life a little, even though at the time she was not sure what she was telling. It didn't matter. All that mattered was that Trunks at least grew up with the idea that the past was a good place thanks in part to his father. As we read in this scene, therefore, we understand that Trunks has a serious need to create memories of his own. It is also a way to give a visual image to his mother's stories, like when a child prefers a book with pictures to a book with only text. That is why Future Trunks stays close to his father, observes him, that is all he needs. As we have noticed, however, things are not quite as he imagined them to be. Vegeta is not what he expected, but the joy of being able to be with him is enough for him to accept him as he is. But... Is it really enough? Think about it. After such a long and difficult journey, after so many legendary tales and especially after so many expectations, how much can it hurt to return home with fewer answers and so many more questions? We do not know exactly what happened during the training between Vegeta and Trunks in the Room of Spirit and Time, but we can safely assume that Vegeta did not open up as Trunks would have liked. It was certainly an emotional moment for him, but not enough to say, "yeah, man, he's really my dad."

The decisive moment occurs precisely during Trunks' death. Earlier we saw that the first one to rescue him is Yamcha, but "obviously" nobody cares because all the attention goes to Vegeta. I understand that. This is the moment when the saiyan prince finally shows his feelings for someone else for the first time. It is not just revenge. Behind Vegeta's reaction is love, and this very feeling will make him frighteningly strong. This naturally amazes everyone, but I am sure that the reaction of the Z-Fighters is due not so much to the increase in his strength as to the fact that Vegeta is having an emotional reaction of this caliber. No one has ever seen him like this. He has officially changed for the better. I am sure Vegeta fans recognize in this scene the split between the ruthless Vegeta of the saiyan saga and the Vegeta we will see in the Buu saga. A new Vegeta has just been born, and everyone has noticed him, even Yamcha who has not had a positive idea about him until then. Actually, it must be said that Yamcha had forgiven Vegeta before anyone else. When Yamcha was still with Bulma, he had agreed to let the saiyan be hosted at his girlfriend's house.

Tien had been the voice of truth. Perhaps his third eye had glimpsed the future, I don't know, but it is quite disturbing to think that some time later this fateful decision would seal the break between Bulma and Yamcha.

What matters for now is that Yamcha has the gift of forgiveness. He did it with Tien when he broke his leg and, although in a different way, he did it with Vegeta who committed much more heinous acts against him. The only difference is that Vegeta never apologized. Once again it is Yamcha who takes a step forward, or rather three steps forward: he forgives the man who killed him, he forgives the man who took away the woman he loved and finally he forgives the man who deprived him of the chance to become a father. Excuse me, but I believe that these three battles are much more intense and difficult than any of the battles we see in Dragon Ball between our heroes and strong monsters. Especially if we think about the fact that Yamcha stays, which doesn't mean that he is just there: the way Yamcha is, it means that he learns to love even those who hurt him and especially to act for their good.

There is only one problem. Trunks cannot see all the love that Vegeta radiates for him. The essence of this scene lies precisely in the fact that finally Future Bulma's tales of Vegeta become real, but what good is all this if Trunks has no way to witness it? A new tale is needed, but this time a real one, based on facts and no longer on memories. A tale that can definitively confirm that Vegeta has a good side and especially cares about his son. So someone must necessarily step up and help Trunks hope again just because of this fantastic news.

...You again, Yamcha?! Then it is a vice! Or maybe you are simply the most beautiful Dragon Ball character ever. Well yes, guys, it is indeed Yamcha who tells Trunks about Vegeta's unexpected heroic feat. He could have told them Krillin or anyone else, but Yamcha's sensitivity precedes all others. In a sense it is as if he is the first to realize that Vegeta has actually changed. We are at the end of the battle. Trunks has been brought back to life and everyone is at Kami's palace. After some small talk and the twist between Krillin and Android 18 (to which Yamcha contributed), the fighters part ways to return home. Yamcha and Trunks head to West City and it is during this journey that Yamcha confesses to the boy what happened. To many it may seem like the least, but think about it very carefully: how many in Yamcha's place would have done the same? I mean, at that moment Yamcha is praising Vegeta for what he did for Trunks. In different words, Yamcha is praising the very man who took away his life, his woman, and the possible marriage he has dreamed of all his life. He had no reason to do it, yet he did it. He could have kept quiet, or told Trunks anything else by deliberately omitting the part about Vegeta out of some sort of personal revenge, but he does not. He does not do it because Yamcha's big heart does not allow him to act in such a mean way. At this very moment he no longer cares what Vegeta did to him. It was enough for him to see him go crazy over Trunks' death to change his mind and accept the fact that Vegeta has changed. That is all Yamcha cares about. Yamcha cares that love guides people, and in this case he cares that Bulma and little Trunks are finally in good hands. The rest no longer matters. The disappointment, humiliation, and anger he feels toward the whole disastrous situation that happened between him, Vegeta, and Bulma is water under the bridge. Yamcha has officially moved on. But it's not just about that. Here Yamcha demonstrates superhuman empathy. He never heard the revelation that Future Trunks told Goku when he first appeared. He did not hear that Trunks had no memories of his father and that this distressed him terribly, yet Yamcha senses this. We have seen how he has formidable intuition, so I am not surprised to believe that he sensed this need in Trunks. He must have imagined that in the future he misses his father figure, and so without a second thought he wanted to give him that warmth that you feel when your father loves you. Once again Yamcha went further and reasoned about situations that are much broader than people think. He took care of the present, but he also took care of the future, and this time without receiving anything in return. Telling Trunks about Vegeta doesn't change his life, but it certainly improves it. It enriches him and he just through all this love that he literally gives to anyone feels stronger and better. Making others feel good is his personal mission. Here we can see that he did it, he got his victory. Trunks' face as he says "my father did?" is full of pride because simply the circle has come full circle. Trunks got the confirmation he was looking for because he knew because of Future Bulma, but he needed to verify it. Yamcha gave peace to his tormented soul.

So guys... I hope it's clear to everyone that if this iconic scene exists, it's really because of Yamcha. I mean, surely Vegeta and Trunks would have said goodbye to each other regardless. But the power of this scene lies precisely in the fact that Trunks knows exactly what happened, what Vegeta did for his son, and as we have seen if he knows it is precisely thanks to Yamcha. In short: Yamcha helped redefine the relationship between Vegeta and Trunks. Yamcha, who as we have seen is the bearer of hope, finally made sense of why Trunks embarked on this journey. He made all of Trunks' dreams come true and in a way allowed him to become stronger, because let's face it, what allows Trunks to beat the androids in his future is not just the super training and battles he does in the past, but more importantly the chance to have experienced all the emotions he was missing and that motivated him to improve his time.

When Trunks returns home, one of the first things he does is tell about the very thing his father did. And if he tells it, let us remember, it is always because of Yamcha. Do you see what I mean? He doesn't give a damn about winning against Cell and the androids. What Trunks takes with him is mostly the emotions accumulated during this incredible experience. Telling about how those monsters were beaten would not have added anything new, because they live in a world where people fight for survival. Telling instead how love and teamwork made all the difference is completely new for him. That is what really matters. We are humans, not robots. There is no point in struggling if you don't have emotions with you. Trunks finally got them. He is finally different from the androids and can now defeat them.

I think the best part of this scene is Future Bulma's reaction. Here we learn that she had indeed ventured a little in telling Trunks about Vegeta. She was not sure about Vegeta's good side either, but she still told her son about it to comfort him. We can see how shocked she is to learn such news. From here we can infer that Future Vegeta was not even a partner in attendance. Somewhat like the Vegeta of the present. In fact, his closeness to Bulma and Trunks occurs after Cell Arc. Not having been able to experience it, Future Bulma was left with the idea that Vegeta had an unexplored good side that she never really saw. She only guessed at it. Therefore, we can say that Yamcha's words have resolved even Future Bulma's doubts. In the present, Yamcha must have noticed the substantial difference between him and Vegeta vis-à-vis Bulma. If Yamcha was affectionate and close, Vegeta is distant and cold. He probably resents that Vegeta behaves this way toward Bulma. Assuming Yamcha sensed that Trunks' future was loveless, it is easy to imagine that he also thought Future Bulma was left alone with her conflicts. After all, Vegeta's change occurred only in the past because some events were changed with Trunks' arrival. It is an exception. I like to think that Yamcha also wanted to help Future Bulma by letting her know that Future Vegeta could learn to love if he had a little more time. Why he did this we will never know. We may think that he did it because Yamcha still loves Bulma, but that would be reductive. Yamcha did it because he just loves. Giving hope is what he does best. It is quite ironic that Yamcha helped the same person who besmirched his memory by telling that he was some kind of playboy. I think it is particularly noticeable here how great Yamcha actually is. Of course he does not know what Future Bulma actually told about him. Trunks only reveals it to Goku, and the only one who hears it is Piccolo. But I am sure that even if Yamcha had known that Future Bulma did not speak highly of him, he would still have done his best to take care of her in every time arc. Lastly he simply enhanced Vegeta's own image. I think it is the most immense act Yamcha could do: to love his greatest enemy. I proudly say that Yamcha, after taking care of the past and the present, has saved even the future. Without exaggeration, he is the one who maintained the link between these three time arcs. If I may say so, he is precisely the one who most represents the theme of this saga.

I would like to conclude with two thoughts...

Any nostalgic Dragon Ball fan knows full well how important Goku's grandfather is. Son Gohan is a kind of angel who watches over the little saiyan from the very beginning, via the dragon ball with the four stars. There is one scene in particular that moves me so much. This is the exact moment when Son Gohan relinquishes this role of guardian angel to Goku's friends. If we want to dwell on Yamcha, I think he is the one who most of all took these words literally. Not only because indeed Yamcha took care of Goku during his illness, but especially because he extended this commandment. Yamcha has really taken care of everyone who is connected to Goku for some reason, precisely because Goku's happiness also depends on those around him. Taking care of Goku also means taking care of his affections, and Yamcha, as we have seen, has done this with everyone. He took care of his wife Chichi, his son Gohan, but also Tien and Krillin, two of Goku's great friends, and finally the saiyans and Bulma. I like to think that it all starts from this very scene, even though Yamcha has always been inclined to help anyone.

At the end of the Cell Arc, the carefree atmosphere of Dragon Ball returns. The one we can't do without, the one that brings us back, when gags were the soul of this story. The reason for all the laughter we witness at Kami's palace is Yamcha. He is the one who makes people laugh because he is afraid of Android 18 and he is the one who relieves the tension by entertaining everyone with his jokes. Among these jokes is one really particular one that on the surface makes him look like an idiot.

Theoretically we should mock him because he has not exactly been lucky in love. His one experience was shattered. Bulma even describes him as a playboy, so his line seems rather grotesque. Butl... After all we've seen, did Yamcha really say bullshit? Okay, he may not be lucky in love relationships, but who says that the love he is talking about is only that which is born between two guys? We saw through him that love is not only between lovers. Love can be between friends, brothers, fathers and sons, ex-girlfriends and even rivals. It doesn't matter who gets it and how they get it: the important thing is only to get it. Yamcha is the one who most spreads love in Dragon Ball. He is the one who gives soul and humanity to Dragon Ball. It is sad to think that he is the one who does not get love in return. But he doesn't care. By giving love he feels loved.

Since hope is what Dragon Ball is based on…. I continue to hope that Yamcha, too, will one day get his well-deserved victory in battle. Because... Let's face it, as a character he has long since won.

Thank you, Yamcha.

Thank you for coming so far. This is definitely my most difficult and exciting topic. It was crazy to write so much about Yamcha but it was worth it. I don’t care how many people read. Having left this opinion could be useful in the future, maybe not, but it’s okay: analyzing Yamcha’s soul was like rediscovering the beauty of being human. I think that’s the most important thing.

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acidsaladd · 1 month

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incoming rant abt a possible ninjago atla au u have been warned

the gist of the au and what i have in me head is that lloyd is the next air avatar but for some reason the air nomads are skeptical/afraid of baby lloyd so misako takes lloyd and skidadles far away from the temple. because of this, lloyd grows up as a regular kid with no air benders around to teach him air bending And no knowledge that hes the avatar (and therefore that he can bend the other elements)

fast forward to when hes like 9?? 10? wu finds him, surprise ur actually the avatar its training time something something big spiritual evil that might be related to garm something something then wu Leaves and so the training bit falls onto the ninja. which. none of them is an airbender mind u and lloyd Still doesnt know airbending. so they teach him the other elements and Hope that he somehow learns air by proxy

i have a very small and not rlly thought out idea for what an equivalent of the aging tea could be but this is basically it in terms of bg and going forward its just ur usual avatar and ninja shenanigans

ok. now. i have a couple ideas for why the air nomads could be wary of lloyd. one is that they know garmadon is his dad and garm has been cursed by a Particularly Evil spirit and so they think evil dad equals evil son and they dont rlly wanna deal with that so they r like we must get rid of the child he will reincarnate either way its no biggie which,,, uhh yea lets not

the other one is that the nomads have discovered that lloyd is going to be the first avatar that is a direct decendant of the first ever avatar (the fsm) and so they want to like?? harness his power or smth idk.

(the only problem with these ideas is that it kinda relies ok the air nomads having kind of violent and evil solutions to problems so i stil. dont rlly know 😭)

the point is!! one way or another, misako starts seriously fearing for lloyds life and the fact that he might not ever have a choice over it as his own so she takes the baby and Runs.

[abt the fsm, raine lowkey gave me this idea entirely so shoutout raine hello but i was thinking that theres two of them. like. u have the FSM, the first ever avatar, all plwerful godly being. and then u have the dad, the f in fsm stands for Father, this guy is just wu and garms dad. i dint have much else thought out for him just. yea]

now. if i want to talk abt the possible aging tea equivalent i need to talk abt garm. soo augh idk abt garm but i think rhe gist of it is that hes been possessed/corrupted by a spirit bc of a deal he made or for messing with a spirit when he was researching things. the point is hes known as this being that brings chaos and stuff but then wu and misako reveal to lloyd like, thats ur dad actually, and misakos being researching ways to bring him back and lloyd stumbles on this research and decides (not so smartly) that if one qants their dad back one must do it himself so. he manages to contact the original spirit that garm annoyed

so they talk and the spirits like "well i Would give him back but he kinda made me lose my time and energy on him for like,, 4/5 years so unless u figure out a way to give me rhat time back i aint giving him to u" and lloyd goes bet take does from me no biggie

so then lloyd makes this deal not rlly knowing what hes doing and he goes back to the real world and suddenly he has a brand new dad and also abt two whole heads more in height woops

(this all happens post training arc starting so lloyd already knows the ninja and has been living with them for a while)

OK NINJA TIME

so ive been Rlly debating whether i should do the Usual thing and just stick em in the element rhat they have in the show. OR (and this is the idea im leaning more towards) i go with vibes. obviously the vibes are still informed and consider their element in the show

ok first kai and nya. i want them both to be fire nation buut idk if i should make them both firebenders or make them have their usual elements. i do wanna let nya be a waterbender, However since they do live in the fire nation (most likely in a more rural town far from the mainland) nya would be a waterbender that uses mostly firebending styles and techniques. i just have always found this type of mix and match they do with aang and zuko specifically SOO COOL i love it so im gifting that to nya

cole is an earthbender obvi. i havent rlly thought much abt cole bc i immediately decided he would stay an earthbender and didnt question him further.

NOW HEAR ME OUT HERE. i kinda rlly want to make jay earth kingdom and leave him as a non bender. why??? bc the Vibes man. i want to rlly focus on his engineering and tinkery side. i think he would still be rlly involved with bending and stuff and he tries to find different uses to bending outside of fighting. maybe him and cole are childhood friends and jay is always bugging cole to try some of his projects with coles bending.

and finally zane!! hes water tribe but i struggled to settle him on either tribe. i think the northern tribe could fit him in the future but i do think he's originally from the south. i feel like the south gives him more potential to be the specific brand of Peculiar that zane was in the beginning of the sbow. and since this is situated pre war, the southern water tribe would be bigger and better off than how we see them in atla so it would be cool to explore that

so im picturing him as the weird son of the local medic and whatever else dr julien gets up to . so maybe dr julien is teaching zane stuff and he gets Rlly Rlly good so they send him to a bigger settlement with better teachers and eventually he decides to leave the south pole to continue learning and stuff.

i do have ideas abt how wu gathers them together but ive ranted way too much so i will make another post on that if i remember to

#THIS GOT SO LING #LONG #I DIDNT EVEN KNOW I HAD THIS MUCH TO SAY #i didnt plan this to be an Actual au its just an idea #but i Do want to mane designs so ??? maybe???#ninjago #blabbering #should i make a tag #i will #spinjitzu? more like avatar state #thats it. thats the tag

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66sharkteeth · 10 months

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Hello! Idk if you are still faking asks but of so thank you in advance if this gets answered!

I'm not gonna lie, it's a bit disturbing how the majority is cheering on Rex and the side he's taken. Though that side might have some points, I just can not see them as people I'd like to ever support or think they are doing it with good intentions in mind. But anyway, I apologize if I just can't understand or root for this gang. I know things aren't black or white but i just see more bad than good. And I hope that's ok.

The only think I dint understand and kind of made me not like Rex so much anymore is that when he is fighting Desmond he mentions something along the lines of "you already met my scyon" and that just raised more questions for me. One of the mane reasons Rex felt hurt and betrayed and thought it was all Desmon and Lys's fault for "betraying him" was because he couldn't under why they would turn on him (it was when he still didn't know about the other part of himself). But now he knows, he knows its the Scyon that hurt and attacked them. Hence why they had such a reaction. I've seen people stating that yes, Rex was betrayed! And I just...I don't see it at all especially when the og gang had every right to react the way they did.

This monnet kind of just made me distance myself from Rex I guess. Because he knew the scyon was the one to hurt the gang, the reason why they reacted the way they did and yet that does nothing for him. I don't think this is bad writing, nit even the slightest. Cause I know some people in real life would have such a reaction. We are flawed beings and some weren't thought or leaned how act to know their actions or way of thinking is flawed etc or self centered. It's a process everyone can go threw in different ways. So I hope maybe Rex one day can learn more as he goes.

But yeah, was there something behind the scenes we didn't see for Rex to not even question that the Scyon hurt Desmond or for him to not even care about that fact?

I still love the comic a lot and its one of 2 other webtoons I follow religiously and have given money for passes! The art and world building I feel like is really good and has made me so inspired to make a fan art and fic for this world (I'm just too afraid and shy to share I guess but I'd love to one day!).

I hope you have a good day and I apologize for any speaking or grammar mistakes I've made. English isn't my first language and I'm also dyslexic 😅

Tbh, I think the only people who are 100% wrong are the ones who think one side is 100% right.

Like you said, the situation isn't black and white (heck, it's even one of the major themes of the story), and both sides have points and flaws, some bigger than others. I know people are having fun cheering for Rex's "corruption arc" (I even love to tease about it), but that's exactly what it is- a corruption arc.

Rex has points and fair criticism, but it's important to also remember the environment he's in. He's Blan Corp's prized pig that they need to keep happy until they get that memory. Other than Bag Girl, Rex is basically surrounded in an echo chamber of yes-men. So no, you didn't really miss anything. Rex is just currently in an environment where everyone is telling him "Yeah! It WAS abusive of Desmond to make you do all those chores!! What a jerk! >:(" and Rex going "yeah, you're right!! I am the victim here! Tell me more."

He's with the villains now and there is a lot of manipulation* going on.(*Side note: Mostly from Jericho and his Scion, to be clear. You could argue Nia as well, but I kind of maintain that she is just as manipulated and in a kind of equally tough position. Remember, Blan Corp is the ticket to getting her mom back and she's kind of in just as big of an echo chamber of "human bad, blank superior" as Rex)

That said, please don't give up hope on him haha. Rex can get a really sharp tongue when he's pissed (as seen in the latest episode with his encounter with Lyss), but he's still the same Rex at heart. He could never take the steps that Jericho is willing to take, and I... Tried to make that clear in ep 133 with Desmond's criticism of Rex's changes. Desmond asked if he really has it in his (half-human) heart to follow in Jericho's foot steps, and I like to think (most of us) know he doesn't- At least not as far as Jericho. Desmond planted the seed of doubt in ep 133 and I don't intend to just...ignore that seed in my writing of what's coming up.

TLDR: Yeah! Rex is being a jerk right now after a lot of manipulation, gaslighting, and just all around anxiety. But that's what a corruption arc is. Only time will tell if he starts to realize what a jerk he's being, but I certainly didn't show him hesitating after what Desmond said because it went in one ear and out the other. That's definitely going to be living rent free in the back of his mind for now.

#some time i want to ramble about rex's anxiety #bc it's something kind of personal to me and that i've actually put a lot of thought into #i just feel awkward rambling about these things when people didn't ask haha #so ty for sending this so i could ramble about this one #bc i agree #rex is a jerk lately and it's a little sad to see how many people don't think he is #a justified jerk in many ways but not others #city of blank

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lakesbian · 4 months

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If Mono and Six landed on the infinity train how big do you thin their numbers would be and what arc do you think they’ll have?

unfortunately the basic premise of this question doesn't work because of the dissonance between how infinity train handles character arcs and how little nightmares handles character arcs.

the basic premise of infinity train's worldbuilding is that it's real life except for the addition of the train (and obligatory subtraction of branded items, hence the fictional gas station chain &c). every passenger is written as mundanely and intricately human. they're all Just Some Guy You Could Meet On The Street, which is to say they have intensely complex psyches, nuanced and storied personal problems, and unique personality traits. tulip eats raw onions because she tried one as a kid and was too stubborn to admit to her parents she didn't like it, holds strict worldviews based on narrow/immature ration about the world and struggles to accept changes that don't fit into her preconceived frameworks, and wears a kinda stupid looking tights/skirt combo because she's 13. jesse is still attached to a song about learning to be nice to people he learned in kindergarten, is a serial social masker because he's convinced people will only like him if he's being exactly what they want him to be, and gets character development from talking honestly about his relationship to swimming. and so on and so forth. grace is a cult leader but she's also just, like, some girl who blows raspberries when she's thinking or excited. the depth of the characterization is inextricable from infinity train's narratives, because each narrative is, by dint of the show's most basic premise (follow these people while they fuck around on a train that kidnaps you and only lets you off if you achieve what it deems to be Personal Growth), entirely fueled by rich characterization and character arcs.

little nightmares, by contrast, actually hinges pretty heavily on vague/fuzzy characterization. it's actively difficult to catch a peek of six, mono, or runaway kid's face. the children you play as have names that are less names in the sense we're familiar with and more markers of isolation-induced anonymity: low, alone, and mono. in runaway kid's case, he doesn't even have a name--he's defined entirely by the fact that he's trying to escape. (from what? the world. does he succeed? no.) we don't know what any of these children like or dislike. we don't know where they came from. they don't have favorite colors, or hobbies, or even dialogue outside of the occasional--almost always barely-audible--"hey"s six and mono exchange to get each others attention. all of these children are defined by one thing: the fact that they are young and small and the world wants to eat, change, or destroy them. what most distinguishes each child from one another is the unique way in which they are hurt: six survives, but at the cost of the part of her that knows how to play and hold onto her friends. mono grows into a man who directly perpetuates the cycle that harmed his childhood self. runaway kid is clever, but unlucky, and never makes it out. and this is all because little nightmares is a visceral, but very nonliteral representation of the nonsensical cruelty of childhood. on a narrative level, the huge scope, mystery, and unfairness of the world the kids live in--and how it hurts them--is all-consuming.

all of which is to say that there's no grounded, detailed characterization that could be used to put six or mono on the train. numbers are calculated based on how far a person is from solving the problem that landed them there, and the train doesn't pick people up for problems that can't be addressed by individual development. six and mono don't need individual development--their only problem is living in a society that views them as worthless and in need of breaking (or consumption or destruction and so on). fundamentally impossible quastion to answer due to the differences in how inftr and ln approach characterization. sadly. :(.

#ask #infinity train #little nightmares #but i hope you enjoyed the analysis regardless

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baeddelicto · 9 months

Text

MÆRA

(Older woman/boy(girl), v light gore, somno?, hypno?, idk i dint actually knw how to label writng mech?)

930 words

《Incubation in 3..2..1..》

*krxh* "Dont you fret hun, i know its daunting down there in that chamber but we're up here with sweaty palms too. Now the fluid is breathable and full of that sweet ambrosia so go ahead and take a breath, relax, and drift away" *khp*

She's right its always a crapshoot isnt it tryn sumthn new nd honestly this fluid hasnt even reached my mouth and i already feel better, less tense, floaty like a salt bath if it were the color and viscosity of dirty engine oil...

Smells sweet, ambrosia huh, hear goes... tastes sweet not that hard to move through my lungs actually, i wonder how lon....

■

"Slipped right past hypnogogia... hope that ain't the case on the flipside. Lower the serum dosage 20%."

"Yessir, entering stage 3......stage 4..... cresting, begining reentry, stage 3"

"Drop another 20. Shit boy slow down. He lied to you Doc."

"It would seem so."

"0 drinks a day my ass."

"We've reached hypnopompia sir."

"Atonia?"

"Yessir!"

"Hot Dog!"

■

Fuck, fuck why can't i talk? Shit somethings wrong w the fluid i cant move! What is-

"Hey sugar, im sure youre all worked up by now so im gonna remind you of earlier when i told you dont fret but um now im not gonna say that bc right now thats what you need. That fear got you real focused. And i need you to take that focus and push out. Focus on the edges of your vision and try to see past all that filth in that pit."

Oh its Jacinta...thats nice... i guess i should listen to her and do something other than freaking out. seems simple enough. Fuck i didnt think a dark room could spin this much. Dont hurl. No hurling. Pleass God. Wait how did Jacinta get in my-

Woah im outside.... That ridgeline its the Salspar Escarpment...

"There you go, Youre a natural kiddo! Now walk toward the escarpment keep your eyes on Salvor's Peak."

I can do that... heh mom always said i needed direction gues i got one. East by Southeast. Honestly one of the better directions westerly spring winds and the rings of Sarthis blaze violet in the afternoon sun. Oh fuck almost tripped that would have been embarassing Jacinta would hav- Why do my feet look so weird and my legs i look lik afucking bug! FUCK oh god wheres my dick?! Wheres my SkIN! FUCKFUKfuckFug I cant feel anything why didnt my knees hurt when i fall? My hands are tearing into my thighs but i cant feel it FUck im bleeding fuCk its everywhr fuck i-

■

"heyy kid how ya feeln?"

Jacinta whispers to me as she lightly brushes the hair out of my face. Her weight was flushing the mattress so that the side of my hip was pressed into hers. She clasps her hand to my brow then traces the half moon of my face to my cheek. Her raven hair glows a deep amber in the evening light streaming in from the window. She gave a crooked smile.

"You're burnin up bud. We gotta get some fluids in you..." She turns to a small table behind her, a messy plait spills over her shoulder and swishes over the small of her back. The rattle of paper on board heralds

"Petragua or citralyte?"

I nod to the petragua and she replaces the other and proffers my mouth a straw. She gazes down at me warmly as i suck down the plum-apricot-chem slurry. The infusion perks me up a bit.

"Alright now don't drain it dry. Don't want it coming back up all over my vest." She pulls it from my lips and i eek a short and quiet suckng sound that manages a full 5 seconds of embarrassment even though the sound was .3 seconds long.

"Kid ill be real with ya. You did great..exceptional even! Most of the time we dont even get to a stroll the first time we just... well its a whole lot more work on my end than what happened with you so i just wanted to say... im proud of you."

She squeezes my shoulder and feathers her hand to my cheek again.

"I know all this been hard on you and you've put in a lot of work before you even got in the pit and it payed off." She picks up the petragua again and hangs it in the air for a second.

"To all your work...and all of our work... and to your health." She sips some of it then positions it back towards me again. I slurp with even more energy this time.

"Having such a strong liminal drive link seams to really make a difference. Honestly i think you two should meet but we have to get clearance pfft its bullshit. How are you supposed to pilot together if you dont even know eachother? How are we supposed to figure out what this spark is that makes the liminal drive work if we never get to observe you interacting in a controled manner? I swear im gonna have a word-"

*slurpppppp* she pulls it from my face.

"Oh listen to me blathern on, you got another 18 hours til youre on rotation again. You can head back to your room whenever. Ill see you then ok? I just wanted to check in on you." And with that she rises, throws her vest on, and clacks and jingles out the door with a two finger wave lingering behind her with her plait.

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dalesramblingsblog · 6 months

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Now I don't want to seem too sour on The Time of the Doctor... even if one might argue that taking a break from the arc for two and a half years was a mistake I think that there's some very nice emotional moments.

Do you think that it was consciously being the opposite to The End of Time, in 11 accepting his fate and saying how it's natural? As I know that 10's last words and his angsting about how regeneration is death... well, they haven't exactly been popular and all the other New Who Doctors have taken regeneration much better.

I'll be honest, this is one thing I've never really understood about the fan reaction to The End of Time. The done thing seems to be to read it as Davies crying about how the big meanie Moffat is gonna come along and take away his precious Doctor Who by casting some nobody called Matt Smith in the role, and I just... I'm so tired.

(Not saying it's done by you in particular, mind, as usual I'm just kind of using a point in our conversations to springboard into talking about generalised fan reactions.)

Even as someone who generally prefers Moffat's handling of the mythologisation of the Doctor, I've never gotten the impression that Davies ever intended a lot of the hubris of the Tenth Doctor to be taken remotely seriously, and the fact that so many fans opt to do so and present it as evidence that the era uncritically embraces "The Doctor as God" or whatever.

Do I think that the Doctor occasionally exerts a little too much gravity over the narrative in the Davies Era? Absolutely. But realistically, it's not too much more gravity than they exert in basically every other era of the programme by sheer dint of the fact that the show is named Doctor Who.

Moreover, Davies' musings on "regeneration as death" are not really too dissimilar from points made by Kate Orman in The Room With No Doors about a decade earlier. Those Davies-esque distinctions which do exist come about mainly as concessions to the fact that where Orman was writing the functionally-penultimate novel in a line of books which had garnered a small yet passionate cult following only to be smothered by the BBC once they realised just how profitable this whole Doctor Who thing might actually still be, The End of Time came at a point where Doctor Who was a legitimate cultural behemoth.

And while one might be tempted to write off any suggestion that that behemoth status was attained by elements specific elements to Davies as auteurish hubris of the worst kind... it's not an entirely incorrect judgement.

Obviously Doctor Who survived without Russell T. Davies; the fact that we're still here nearly fourteen years later talking about it as a regularly airing television programme - a gap almost as long as the Wilderness Years themselves, mind - proves as much.

(The unjustifiably snarky comment to make here would be that we're doing so barely two weeks removed from a return by Davies to the position of showrunner, but that runs the risk of being rather uncharitable to both Moffat and, yes, Chibnall.)

Indeed, Doctor Who continued to be enormously popular without Russell T. Davies, and eventually managed to be enormously popular without Matt Smith, even if we had to take the long way round - sorry - by suffering through a good decade's worth of "Here's why Kill the Moon/Hell Bent (reader's choice) is the worst episode evar!!!1" takes.

While I do think it's certainly possible that Moffat could have, somewhere along the line, decided to structure The Time of the Doctor as a response to The End of Time - Hell Bent loudly rejecting the climax of the episode that serves as the absolute zenith of Doctor Who's cultural relevance within the United Kingdom certainly proves he's not above a bit of friendly nose-tweaking of the Davies years' "greatest hits" - however, I think that belies the frankly far more interesting way in which it serves to pay off themes that were baked into the Eleventh Doctor's characterisation ever since The Eleventh Hour.

Hell, it really pays off themes that have been evident in Moffat's wider oeuvre since at least Joking Apart, in its focus upon deeply flawed men who really could do with learning not to consistently disappoint and fail the women in their lives.

(And yes, here's the point where I note that this is just as reductive a reading as boiling down Moffat's use of gender - which certainly has its flaws, don't get me wrong - to "Oh he's a raging misogynist who despises women and gets high off his own cleverness." So I mean, if this post happens to reach that side of Tumblr, hello, how're you doing?)

Anyway, this all kind of gets at what I was talking about last time, where modern Doctor Who fans really seem to desire a very rigid and auteurish brand of showrunning, to the point of treating each showrunner as if they're a League team with their own set of rivalries, as opposed to three guys who seem to be on basically good terms with one another on account of having come up through pretty much the exact same wave of fandom.

And it is, I think, a little silly.

#doctor who #ask #tenth doctor #eleventh doctor #russell t davies #steven moffat #kate orman

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jalebi-weds-bluetooth · 4 months

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Hey jalebi, read your jibe about Arnav keeping numb for whole post-kidnaping scene, Honestly it hell bothered me how Arnav couldn't standup for khushi until she tells him he could see truth in her eyes and I was like wtf!!! It was so disgusting that nobody tried to stop Shyam's blasphemous comments on khushi's character but Arnav being more silent hurt me. He haven't told truth of what had happened, never investigated or brought truth out even after all shyam had done, nor thought of putting him in prison, Khushi being khushi never even blamed anyone except herself was ultimately A indian bahu move. I really wish they had better story line but who am I? I was barely 10 back then😂🤌 who dint have idea about ipkknd except the fact that my family was obsessed with it and all I could grasp with my non-hindi thought process was there's a pale girl with weird clothes and a angry guy who keeps shouting at her and she shamelessly kept gravitating around him until he realised she is his true love and then loved her back, end of the story 😂. Until I have turned 17 when I started watching ipk for real and started loving it along with hating for poor storyline hypocrisy sometimes!!!

Hello Hello,

I wonder if there were some scheduling conflicts and the actor was not available hence they wrote the lines around. But also, in the very little that Arnav says they wanted to establish that now with the whole world against Khushi, Arnav 'believes' her.

They tried to do a 'closure' of the terrace scene and half heard misunderstandings but I think it was a misfire.

Ok, one thing - there's nothing shameless to be attracted to someone you don't want to see.

That is literally the theme of the show. To be attracted to people you do not want. IPK did have a really great storyline compared to its fellow shows but I do think they hammered a lot of ITV expectations into khushi - thus give as a very intrusive inconsistent character.

I will never understand why they let Arnav be abusive post wedding. It should've been a cold wedding, not an abusive one.

Also Arnav and Khush's attraction/love to each other has very little to do with reciprocity. In fact neither realizes really that the other person reciprocated all the feelings.

I do wish Khushi was much better written - and sometimes the female leads on ITV have gotten better with time (Anika, Sonakshis, Tara). And I largely believe it is Sanaya Irani who made Khushi absolutely amazing.

Best,

Jalebi

#ask #anon #ipkknd

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