#elis turn for appreciation <3

[turbulentscrawl]

Naib and Eli resting their head on gender neutral s/o’s boobs sfw, how do they go about to getting into the position, what’s their reaction if their s/o calls them out lovingly ofc!! please :3!!

Heck yeah!! I wasn't entirely sure if you wanted HCs or a little scene so here's a bit of both.

Naib Subedar

-Mr. “I do what I want” right here just sees an opening and goes for it. As long as you’re in private, of course.

-If you seriously want him to get off he will, but he can tell when you’re just messing with him and plays along with it a bit.

-He can take some teasing, especially if it means he gets to stay like this longer.

---

You blinked and he was there, full weight settling carefully against yours. When you lifted your book to peer down at the shirtless mercenary who’d joined you in bed, skin still hot and steaming from his shower. He deigned not to return eye contact and instead nuzzled his jaw into your sternum. Both of his hands wormed their way between the bed and the small of your back and squeezed. His legs clenched and stretched like a cat, and then he fell still.

“Whatcha doing?” you asked.

“‘M tired,” Naib said in response, muffled slightly against your chest. His hair was down, dripping, dampening your shirt.

“I’m sure, it sounded like your match was a busy one for my favorite rescue specialist.” He groaned in confirmation. “But you know there’s a perfectly good pillow right next to me?” You felt more than saw his lips pull into a smirk.

“I like these better,” he said. “Warmer, softer, and they come with a heartbeat.” To punctuate his point, Naib laid his ear right over your heart and settled back in. “Rub my back for me.”

“You’re being awfully demanding,” you replied. “What if I don’t like you laying on me like this, hmm?”

Naib groaned louder and made a show of peeling himself away from you. He got as far as elbow-height from your body before you tossed your book away, forcibly hugged his face back into your chest, and locked your legs around his waist. With a short laugh, he collapsed back on top of you. One of his hands ran the length of your side appreciatively while he settled back in, cheeks now well and truly smushed by your bosom.

“You’re the best,” he muttered when your hands began rubbing circles into his shoulders, and after several minutes drifted away to sleep.

Eli Clark

-A little more shy about it. He asks first, but he’s just a tiny bit awkward about it.

-Also handles teasing well, as he knows when you’re being serious or not, even if you’re really subtle.

-So very sweet about it. He just wants to be held. ;;

---

Eli finally stepped into your room after checking on everyone post-match. It always took him forever to make his rounds, but it was hard to be upset when his absence was for such kind reasons. Brooke Rose took a perch onyour coat rack, and Eli made himself comfortable, sluggishly removing both his cloak and eyemask. You were already watching him when he turned to face you, bright blue eyes locking onto your form. A sweet, but tired smile slipped onto his lips.

After several long moments holding one another’s stares like that, and his cheeks steadily growing pink, you ventured to ask, “Is everything alright?”

“Ah,” Eli finally said. “I was just wondering…if I could join you?”

“Of course you can,” you chuckled. Always cautious, this one, even after losing count of all the times you’ve given permission. You patted the mattress next to you, and Eli seemed pleased with the offer, but stopped again with just one knee on the bed, vaguely hovering over your reclined form.

“Actually, I was wondering if I might…lay on you?” he asked.

“Feeling a little extra clingy tonight, are we?” you asked back. His head dipped away in embarrassment, but he didn’t retreat from you. He chuckled good-naturedly.

“Can I?” he asked again.

“Can you?” Your voice dropped low, teasing and suggestive.

“You’re cheeky,” he said back, “I think I can.” Carefully, he slid himself up against your side. His legs tangled with yours, torso half-topping, half-spooning you. He was trying to be mindful of his weight, but when he finally settled and seemed happy with the position, he was coiled around you like ivy. And his head cradled right against your boobs.

“I see what this is,” you taunted, unable to resist one more. “You just wanted easy access to the stress balls.” Eli barked a loud laugh in response. He turned his head up as if to say something but cut himself off when your fingers slipped into his hair and began combing through it. The treatment relaxed him, and you two fell gently into intimate silence.

#idv x reader #identity v x reader #naib subedar x reader #eli clark x reader #idv seer #idv mercenary #turbulentscrawl

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Take Shelter 5

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon, stalking, possessiveness and other elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You keep to yourself, until you can’t anymore. (another short reader because why not)

Character: Thor Odinson

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you all the way to Asgard. Take care. 💖

You wake in your bed.

It’s the singular reality you can perceive. The morning beams outside your window as the dampness of the evening due invades the space. You shiver as you turn your head side to side, taking in the room. Everything is just as it should be. It is only the window that’s open when it should be closed.

You shudder as the last memories of consciousness flood your mind. The crashing storm, the swirling winds, the darkness that consumed you and the room. Then it was all gone and you woke up as you are now.

What day is it? That’s harder to bring to mind. It’s like your brain is foggy. The world around you feels like a facsimile. You push yourself up with effort and the blanket falls away from your shoulders.

You nearly scream as you find yourself wearing the dress. The white fabric flutters around your shoulders and fits your figure perfectly. It’s soft and comfy but you don’t belong in it. It isn’t truly yours.

You scramble across the bed but as you stand, your vision turns patchy and you stumble. You land on your knees, cradling your head as you gulp in air. You stood too fast. Just a bit of head rush.

You catch your breath and rein in your tilting vision. You put one foot down then the other and rise again. You strain to unzip the dress and shimmy it off, uncertain what to do with it other than drap it over the foot of the bed.

You leave it there and go into the bathroom. You crank on the sink and bend to rinse your face, the cobwebs clinging in your mind. You peek at your reflection and nearly cry out.

You blink at the sight of your chest. The ripples of lightening emblazoned just below your collar bones in contrast to your skin tone. You gape at the inexplicable marking and grip the edge of the sink.

Are you still dreaming?

No, there's that heaviness that assures you that you are firmly implanted on reality.

You shakily raise your hand to touch the marking. It doesn't hurt. If anything, it's numb.

What happened to you? You push yourself away from the counter and groan, rubbing your temples as you try to understand. Nothing makes sense.

You drop your hands and warily return to the bedroom. You go to close the window and stop. The coin, that cursed piece of gold, sits on the sill. You shut the window, refusing to touch the mysterious artifact.

You hesitate before you emerge from the bedroom. You creep forward on the side of your feet, trying to muffle the noise of your advance. Empty. Nothing. Not a single trace of an intruder.

Are you going crazy? What is going on? Are you blacking out and dressing up and stealing the little trinkets that keep appearing?

You retrieve your phone from the living room and find a notification waiting for you. You assume it's Eli reminding you of a schedule change but instead find an unidentified number. You tap the notification, ready to delete another scammer.

Oh. It's Peter. You texted him just before you left work to make sure he had your number too.

‘Hey, just checking in. No pressure. Our first session is this weekend. Can email character sheets ahead if it's easier.’

You don't answer and black out the phone. You have to work. You need to focus on that. Anything to distract you from the strange things all around you.

Maybe then it might be good to escape into fantasy…

You check the time and fall into your usual routine. You clean yourself up and pull on your jeans and the branded store polo. As you try to forget the night you can't even remember, every second is wrought in its echoes.

⚡️

Work is dull. Just as ever. Eli calls to let you know he's sick. You're disappointed but ask him if he's okay. He says it's just a cough that came on with the rain.

You're the only defense. You greet each customer as they come in and do your best to help them. You stand behind the counter as if it's a shield. Your very own fortress.

There isn't any rush to deal with, just the ebb and flow or mostly curious shoppers, just browsing. You keep your vigil at the counter, elbows planted as you stare at Peter's message. You feel bad leaving him on read.

You need to make up your mind. You suppose you only have to commit to one session. If there's already a character created, he could easily replace you. Heck, you could get Eli to step in as a sub. He'd be perfect.

‘Hi Peter. Thank you for the invite. I'll do it. Srry for late response.’

You blow out a breath nervously. Commitment always feels suffocating. You're not very social and you find the dramatics of some players can be overwhelming. You appreciate their enthusiasm but it can be a bit much.

You peer around lazily, a few passerbys glancing in but nothing else. Your phone buzzes softly and Peter responds.

'Great. You're a life saver. I can send the links to the character sheet here or if you have an email I'll add you to the cloud.'

'Link is fine', you reply.

Right, this is going to be... you don't know. You're not quite sure why you said yes. Maybe it's that latent feeling that everything is just passing you by. Or maybe you're scared and it's easier to be around other people. You never thought you would think that.

A sudden zing flows through your chest and you drop your phone. You touch the top of your shirt and hiss. As you look down, you remember the stranger mark on your body. Wait... maybe you were struck by lightning? But why would there be no marks in your room or on the furniture? You don't think the window would still be intact if you that were the case.

Before you can sink too far into dread, a customer struts through the door. You blink as you recognise him. He was just there yesterday. Theo... no, Thor. You keep forgetting.

"Ah, lady, it is only you," he booms as he enters, quaking you with his timbre.

You nod with a sheepish smile. You search around him for Peter. He's alone. So are you. You gulp.

"I was only in the area and... well, I went to the coffee vendor and they made me the wrong drink," he holds up the cup in his hand, "are you interested in lavendar latte? Unfortunately, I've had some bad experiences with the plant."

"Oh," you eye the tall cup. "That's... I can't--"

"Are you allergic? I've heard you midgardians suffer those afflictions. I saw a man nearly die from eating a nut."

You furrow your brow as another sear ripples over your chest. The marks hadn't hurt at all before but now they are on fire. You clutch your hands together and swallow the tension.

"No, I'm not, but that's... too nice."

"Well, not really," he tilts his head as he comes closer, "you see, I can't enjoy it myself. It's hardly a gallant gesture, is it?"

"I suppose," you squeeze your hands tighter. Your vision clouds at the edges and you get the rolling sensation in your skull as if you might pass out. You haven't eaten, it's your own fault. You poke your tongue behind your lip and look him in the face. You don't want to be rude. "Thanks, I guess... I'll take it. Thank you."

"Not at all," he smiles wider and puts the cup before you. "So, lady, have you decided yet? Are you to join us for our quest?"

"Erm, uh," you look down at your phone, "yeah, actually, I just confirmed with Peter."

"That is wonderful!" He claps his hands and you flinch as the noise is like thunder.

"Yeah," you eke out, wobbling as you keep your folded hands against the counter.

"I hear it is a very fun game," he continues on as your head pulses. "Lady, will you not try the drink?"

"Oh?" You're jarred by his redirect and shake your head with a flutter of lashes, "sure."

You reach for the cup and drag it closer. You lean heavily on the counter as you move with frailty. You pop off the lid and find steamed foam marked with purple petals. You inhale the sent as you lift the cup weakly and take a slurp. It's sweet and fragrant.

"Mmm, it's good," you put the cup down a bit heavier than you intend and wipe the bow of your lip.

"Lady are you unwell?" Thor asks.

Your ears rings and your vision narrows on him. He doesn't look like he did before. He doesn't wear the faded denim jacket or grey tee shirt. He is adorn in scarlet and gold and his hair is loose and flowing around thick braid. You blink and he is as he was before. You don't think you're okay.

"I think..." your words slur and you feel yourself tipping backwards as your eyes roll back.

The world is black before you can feel the impact of the floor. You plunge into bleary depths, no sound, no sight. Nothing.

You come too with a start, eyes snapping open as you gasp. Your lashes stick together as you blink and look up at the strands of Thor's golden beard. He sits on the floor as he pillow you in his lap, both of you cramped in the space behind the counter.

"What..." you croak as you bend your arm awkwardly to brush your cheek.

"You are alright, little one," Thor assures you as he pets your head, "only a little affect, I think."

You grumble and try to sit up. He helps you with a hand on your back. You're entirely disoriented by the shift and nearly fall back against him.

"Please lady, you must be cautious," he turns you to lean against the wall. He raises himself on one knee and pulls off his denim jacket, draping it over you and tugging it down between your back and the wall. "Here," he reaches for the drink still on the counter, "drink this. You'll feel better."

"I... I'm sorry, I'm okay, you don't have to--"

"It is what a king does," he insists and rubs your shoulder.

"Excuse me," a nasally voice calls from the other side of the counter, "is there anyone here?"

Thor springs up to his feat easily, agile for a man his size. He spins to face the customer. "Ah, yes, hello, and what are we shopping for today, good sir?"

"I need Warhammer Ultramarines," the unseen man demands. You can assume what he looks like, you're certain you've seen him before.

"Hm, ah, yes, I'm not..."

"Hold up," the customer says, "are you-- are you-- the God of Thunder?"

"Some call me that," Thor chuckles.

"This is so awesome! Can I get a picture?"

"Yes, you may," Thor accepts and leans over the counter.

You sit dumbly on the floor. The very thought of standing makes your head pulse. You look down at the latte and cradle it close, taking a gentle sip. It warms you but only worsens the emptiness in your stomach. You can't help but shiver at the thought of what could have happened if Thor wasn't here…

#thor #dark thor #dark!thor #thor x reader #fic #take shelter #dark fic #dark!fic #series #avengers #mcu #marvel

[writingoddess1125]

Blip on the Radar pt. 1

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader + OOC Erik

Part 2 ->

Would appreciate a donation to my Ko-Fi so I can survive in this economy! Enjoy!

"Alright big guy bed time" You say as you swoop down and pick up your toddler, feeling him already tired from the day.

"No No Mama" Erik chimed. His mess of blonde hair covering his sleepy blue eyes which was trying to resist sleep

"Yes Yes Bean" You say with a giggle carrying him to his room and lay him down giving him his favorite stuffed bear you watch as he falls asleep in seconds.

Smiling as you watch his sleeping face and gently caress his cheek- despite the times that had passed you couldn't help but be amused by how much Erik didn't look like you, if it hadn't been for the 30hrs of labor you went through and seeing that headful of blonde hair when he was first born you would have been sure the hospital had switched your child.

He was a stocky and tall toddler, for being 2 years old he could easily be mistaken as a 3 year old- especially since he had big hands. He reminded you up a pitbull puppy, were you could see he was going to be a big boy.

Most likely like his father, which you assumed he was a carbon copy of.

It had been a bar hookup 3 years ago on a trip abroad, nothing special or unique in truth- You didn't even remember the guys name, you just remever his bright blue eyes, some blonde hair and a deep English accent. However that was about it- Besides you had your face in the pillows too much to know anyway, the next morning he had already been gone and you were content with that.

However seemed the universe decided to just screw you over as a few months later you found out you were pregnant. Not an ideal way to become a mother However you were one non the less.

Walking out of the room silently you began to pick up around the house, all Erik's toys and snacks he had dropped throughout the day but that was short lived as the couch called to you. Finally taking a seat you turn on some late night YV and sigh heavily- that exhaustion going through you as you laid there trying to will yourself to do more.

Going through your phone you see that you got a notification from Ancestory, raising a brow as you opened it and saw the results for your son upload.

"Oh yeah.. forgot about that"

A few weeks previously you'd done a DNA test on your son, mainly for medical history and to gather some basic information. As it populated you were met with pages of blacked our marker, Literally almost nothing was visible and you could see the British royal forces logo in the corner of most things but everything was crossed out.

"Why is so much of this crossed out?.." You muttered, squinting at the print on your phone over why so much information was limited from your sons father's side- You couldn't see much accept for last names and some general years.

"Weird.. Like a ghost... did I fuck a spy?-" You mutter, shrugging at this and close of your phone. Fairly sure you'd spooked yourself or that the Ancestory was wrong in some way. Waste of 90$-

0500 hr Other side of globe

It was far too early for this- Ms. Elis marched down the corridors of the Barracks with a file in her hand- her face no better then a thunderstorm as she marched.

Ghost could hear her from down the barracks hall from how loudly she was stomping around- he understood she was the TF 141 lawyer but she was a royal pain in the ass as well- he was seated on a couch of this temporary barracks common room and reading, dressed in more casual military attire and a plain balaclava covering his face.

"Price!" She called out once seeing him I'm his office and slamming the door behind her, Ghost looking up to see that banshee of a lawyer looking ready to snap again- sighing heavily as he tried to go back to reading.

"What do you think it's this time?" Soap said as he plopped himself next to the reading man with a relaxed sigh- Simon rolling his eyes at the Scotsman.

"Nothing that I'm willing to think about-" He grumbled, but his ear was picking up her yelling at Price dramtically- Once again. Banshee. That and one that had a flare for the dramatics.

After 10 minutes of this, The banshee of a lawyer stepped out of the office and turned to look right at Ghost-

"Mr. Riley, can you step into the office with us" She asked, a fake sweetness to her voice but he could hear the strain of frustration.

Fucking Hell...

Soap gave a crooked smile at the Lieutenant like a child pleased to see his peer being called in by the principal. Ghost silently stepped in and nodded at his Captian who gestured for him to take a seat.

Taking a seat he could see Price was on the brink of either snapping at the lawyer or getting a glass of scotch to dull whatever was happening.

"Sir" Ghost greeted Price but was giving a awkward nod- Clearly this not being something good.

"Well I never thought this would be a conversation I'd have but- Were you intimate with anyone in (insert location) around 3 years ago?" Price ask as calmly as possible- Clearly the lawyer keeping him from speaking in honest remark. Ghost felt a chill up his spin and his eyes narrowed.

"...What is this about Captian-" He asked sharply, Price grabbing two cigars and handing one to Ghost and keeping one himself.

"Well to be honest.. in short it looks like you have a kid Simon.. a little boy to be exact" Price said truthfully as the lawyer held the file out for Ghost. His eyes widened at hearing this, Looking slowly up at the lawyer as she handed him the file- Setting down the cigar quickly he opened it and saw the photos pulled from your Instagram as well as the ancestory website pages that did connect the toddler to him.

"It seems she was trying to get medical information through ancestory and we saw that your guys DNA connects. With the timing of the last time you were in that city it matches with the child's age" Ms. Elis said calmly as Ghost continued to look through the photos and information about you and his child.

"Simon?" Price said as he saw the man seemingly in a daze, staring at the folder. However Price could tell his mind was in a different place-

The lawyer was trying to go through options that Simon could take, paying child support, visitation, renouncing parental rights- However he was too dazed to even process any of this. Instead just sitting there thinking that he had a kid out there with this random stranger, were they a good mom? Did they love the kid? What if they were in a abusive home like he had been? Oh he couldn't let that happened.. it was be a nice snowy day in hell before he did. But also fear that his background would come to haunt him- How if he was in the kids life he could risk being a bad influence to the child as well.

Standing up suddently Simon held the folder looking to Price then the Laywer.

"What city are they located at Sir?-"

#simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #call of duty #call of duty imagine #simon ghost x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #cod mw2 #cod ghost

[eddiemunsons80sbaby]

Never Say Never

Chapter 14

Pairing: SingleDad!StevexReader

Summary: You are a 32 year old single mother, raising your seven year old son on your own. After being widowed at 30 and going out on awful dates with disgusting men for the past month, you have decided that you're giving up. You already had your great love. One person can't possibly get lucky enough to have two in their lifetime. But then your son starts playing baseball and the coach might just change your mind about that.

No posting schedule.

18+ only for eventual smut

Word Count: 8.9K

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13

You grinned, holding out your arms when you spotted Eli coming out of the school with Jeremiah, waiting for the usual running hug you received that almost knocked you over now that your boy was getting bigger. But instead, your little boy just trudged slowly over to you, his head hung down toward the sidewalk beneath his feet. Your heart seized, just like it always did when your son looked anything but happy. 

It was one of those moments of being a parent that reminded you how inextricably your heart was linked to theirs, your happiness, your very life. There was nothing that would smash through a good day with the force of a wrecking ball like seeing your child heartbroken. And right now, Eli looked like someone had taken a sledgehammer to that beautiful little organ in his chest.

“Uh-oh, it doesn’t look like someone had a very good day,” Steve muttered softly next to you as Jeremiah walked up to him, not looking much happier than Eli. He ruffled his son’s hair. “Hey kid. How was school?”

Jere shrugged, “Okay.”

“Just okay? No crazy stories to tell today?”

“Not really.” The boy sighed, the sound so big it took up his whole body, glancing over at Eli who was standing stiff and quiet next to you. 

You didn’t like this. Both boys were far too subdued. Their usual excitement and chattiness after school was nowhere to be found. Eli’s arms were wrapped tightly around his middle as if he were protecting himself from some unseen danger or trying to hold something in that was threatening to fall out. 

“Hey buddy,” you said softly, placing your hands on your knees, leaning over so your eyes were at his level. “Everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine,” he snapped shortly, turning his body quickly as you reached for him, rejecting your touch. “Can we just go home?”

Steve shared a worried look with you. You stood up straight, offering your son your hand but he didn’t take it, your heart breaking just a little at his refusal of even this small comfort. 

Steve stepped forward, dropping to his knees in front of Eli, “Did something happen at school?”

“I said I want to go home,” he stubbornly replied, refusing to look at Steve. 

“I know and your mom’s going to take you home but you know, if something happened, you can talk to us. Talking about stuff usually helps me feel better.”

“Nothing happened and even if it did I don’t want to talk to you about it,” Eli growled and then stomped away. 

But he paused when he got to the curb, remembering he wasn’t supposed to walk into the parking lot alone. So instead he just stood, arms folded, glaring off into the distance. It should have been comical how he still followed the rules even when he was so angry but you were unable to find anything remotely amusing about this situation.

You could see the hurt etched across Steve’s beautiful face. But he recovered quickly, rising to his feet. Stepping into him, you kissed his cheek, offering him a sympathetic smile. You appreciated that he was trying to help but this one might have to be on you. You just hoped he wasn’t taking Eli’s rejection too hard.

“Thanks for trying. I’m sorry he said that. He doesn’t mean it. Not really. He’s just upset right now. He adores you. You know that, right?”

“Yeah.” He was trying to shake it off but not doing the best job of it. You could see Eli’s dismissal had rattled him. It had to be jarring when the kid usually worshiped the ground he walked on most of the time. “Yeah. It’s fine. I just thought…you know…maybe he’d talk to me guy to guy or something but it’s fine.”

“I’m going to talk to him,” you assured him, resting your hands against his chest. “I’ll figure out what’s going on.”

“Sure looks like he might be a tough egg to crack.”

You smiled, “This isn’t my first rodeo with moody Eli.” You winked. “Trust me. I’ll get him to tell me.”

Jeremiah spoke up, “Brent told him he doesn’t have a dad.”

“What?” Steve turned to his son. 

The boy shrugged, “We were at recess playing superheroes. We were wearing the capes that Mrs. Perry always lets us borrow from the dress-up bin and Brent was picking on us like he always does. He said we were gay because we liked to dance around in capes and that we were gay for each other. Eli got mad and said he’d rather be gay than be a jerk. Then Brent said at least he still had a dad and that was why Eli was running around in a cape because he didn’t have a dad to show him how to act like a real boy.”

A boulder the size of a small town was pressing down on your chest, a tidal wave churning your stomach, as you took in Jeremiah’s words. You swayed on your feet, your eyes darting to the pink shirt with flamingos that the art teacher was wearing, the bright yellow shoes on a child’s feet running past, the rainbow painting that adorned the window of a kindergarten classroom. 

Steve hand found yours, fingers slipping between your own and he squeezed tightly, grounding you. You focused on the pressure of his hand, the tips of his fingers pressing into your palm, as you listened to the sound of children talking, bringing yourself slowly back from the brink. Steve was murmuring something in your ear and as your heart rate calmed, you could finally focus on his words.

“I know you’re upset and you have every right to be. But I’m right here with you. You’re safe. Breathe for me.” As you opened your eyes and nodded, he gave you a small smile before turning back to his son. “Brent? Is his dad the one that has that giant American flag attached to the bed of his pickup truck?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, that explains it,” he grumbled. “His parents are ignorant assholes. Of course they’re raising a kid who’s a little jerk. They’re probably proud of his bullying. His mom was the one at the PTO meeting yelling about the kids reading James and the Giant Peach because it promoted mysticism and that went against the bible.” He rolled his eyes and then began looking around. “Are they still here? I’d be more than happy to have a talk with them.”

“Steve…”

“Seriously honey. That’s bullshit. How dare that kid say something about his dad. How cruel can that little shit be? He’s going after a kid for having a dead parent?”

“Steve…” you tried again.

“That’s his truck.” He pointed. “It’s hard to miss. He’s got to make sure everyone knows what fucking country he lives in. Don’t worry. I’ll make sure he knows just what an asshole he’s raising his kid to be.” 

He began to step in the direction of the truck and you jumped in front of him, holding your hands out to block him. Those hazel eyes met yours and the fury you saw there, the absolute anger for your son and what someone had put him through, knocked the wind right out of your body. Because that four letter word began flashing like a beacon in your mind, the word you were trying so hard to ignore. 

“Steve, stop. I appreciate what you’re trying to do. Really I do. But you know as well as I do that nothing you say to that dad is going to change the way he thinks. You can’t change someone who doesn’t see anything wrong with the way they think. Those kinds of people are convinced they’re right because they have God on their side and nothing you say will make a difference. It’s only going to cause a bigger problem. I’ve got it, okay? I will get Eli some hot chocolate with marshmallows when we get home and he and I will talk. I’ll have him right as rain before you and Jere come over later.”

“Are you sure? Because I can handle myself. That guy doesn’t scare me. I know he’s big but you know what they say? The bigger they are, the harder they fall.”

“I am not doubting your ability to take him down,” you smiled, reaching out to squeeze his biceps assuringly. “You are a very strong man, Steve. I am sure you could lay him out but I am sure. I would rather focus on what I can change which is Eli’s reaction to people being mean. There will always be awful people in this world and my son has to learn how to navigate that.”

“Okay. If you’re sure…” His hands came to his hips, eyes down on the sidewalk before he finally looked back up at you. He was letting it go but you could see how much it pained him to do so. “I’ll be there around five so you can head out to meet the girls, okay?”

“I’ll see you at five.”

A quick kiss and then you were walking next to your surly child across the parking lot to the car. Your stomach rolled, knowing this was going to be a tough conversation to have with him, knowing it was going to be difficult to even get him to tell you what happened. 

Your sweet boy, always concerned about you. You already knew why he was keeping it secret, why he felt he needed to just squash it down and live with it. He thought that telling you would make you sad. Eli lived with the fear that his mom would disappear on him again, retreating into that dark shell you had disappeared into for a while after Justin had died. But you needed to show him that you were strong, that you weren't going to fall apart at the mere mention of his death, that you could be there for him, that he didn’t have to shoulder so much of it on himself. 

The car ride home was silent. You kept stealing glances in the rearview mirror but your son kept his focus out the window the entire time. You kept the music off, allowing him to feel what he was feeling, to stew in it for a bit before you tried to get him out of it. 

Your therapist was always telling you not to fight your emotions, to let them come. It was okay to feel. It was okay to be sad. It was okay to be angry. We had to allow it in, recognize it for what it was, and only then could we try to move past it. Eli’s therapist had told you much of the same thing. 

You'd had some rough moments the first year after Justin’s passing. Eli had lashed out, throwing things and screaming. He would burst into tears over the simplest inconveniences. He was feeling big emotions that his five year old body didn’t know how to handle. Sometimes those things still reared their head for no logical reason whatsoever. But as you'd learned, there was no time limit on grief and it would hit in the weirdest ways at the weirdest times and it was okay. 

You pulled in the drive and before you could even get out of the car, Eli was stomping up the sidewalk and waiting on the porch. You quietly followed, unlocking the door, watching as he unceremoniously dropped his backpack to the ground. He tried to escape up the stairs but you stopped him. 

“Eli, please don’t go up to your room yet. I would like to talk to you.”

“Why?”

“Because I can tell that something is bothering you. If something happened that made you mad, that’s okay. You’re allowed to feel mad but you still need to talk about it.”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he grumbled. 

“I know you don’t but if it’s because you think that you’re going to make me sad…you know, that’s okay. It’s okay if I feel sad. I am not going to crumble or hide in my room anymore from being sad. I don’t want you to be scared to talk to me.”

“I’m not scared. I’m just angry. I’m furious! I hate Brent!”

“Hate is a really strong word.”

“Well, I feel really strong about it!” he screamed, his little face as red as a tomato. “He’s so mean! He said I’m not like a boy because I don’t have a dad! He said I’m gay like gay is bad but it’s not! He’s always saying stuff like that to people! He told Chris that it’s no wonder he has poor people shoes because his mom spends all her money on beer! He smacked Beth’s cookie out of her hand and told her she didn’t need it because she’s fat! He’s always mean! The teacher sends him to the office and calls his parents but it doesn’t change! He’s still mean!”

“And that makes you angry.”

“Yes, it makes me angry! I wish I was bigger so I could punch him in the nose but he’s so much bigger than me. And if daddy were here then he could teach me how to be tough because he was a soldier and he was tough. Or he could go punch Brent’s dad and tell him to have Brent leave people alone but he’s not here!”

“Oh honey…your dad was tough but he wouldn’t have punched somebody like that.” You moved toward him, dropping down in front of him. “Your dad would have tried to teach you how to handle people like that and violence isn’t the answer. A kid like Brent, he just wants to hurt people. He wants to see them sad or angry. Maybe because he’s so sad and angry that he thinks it will make him feel better but it won’t. But when people like him don’t get what they want, they move onto someone else. You have to be confident in who you are and know that nothing he says means anything. No one gets to define who you are but you.”

“But he shouldn’t be allowed to say that stuff!”

“No. He shouldn’t. And in a perfect world, no one would ever be that cruel but it’s not a perfect world. You’re going to come across people like Brent your whole life. Eli, I still come across people like that. It doesn’t stop. You can’t control what they say or how they act. All you can do is control how you respond.”

“Well, that just sucks.”

“It does,” you agreed. “But you can choose to be a good part of the world and I believe the more good people there are, they can outweigh the bad ones. If you all stick together and stand up to him, not just you but all the kids he’s picking on, he’ll back off. There’s strength in numbers and bullies don’t like an unfair fight.”

“So we should all beat him up together?”

“No,” you chuckled, shaking your head. “That’s not what I’m saying. But if you all stand together and tell him you’re not taking it anymore, tell him we feel angry when you call us names and say mean things and we want you to stop. Isolate him. Try to get the rest of the class to stick together at lunch and recess and don’t include him. Show him that if he acts that way then no one will want to be around him.”

“But what about Travis and Ricky? They follow him everywhere.”

“Well, maybe if you all ignore them too that will change. They’ll see that hanging out with him doesn’t have the perks they think it does. People who stick to a bully usually do it because they’re getting something in return. Sometimes it’s simply because then the bully isn’t picking on them. But if he has nobody else to pick on, I am betting he will turn on them and they’ll change their mind pretty quickly.”

Eli considered your words for a minute and then nodded, “Okay. I still think he needs a punch in the nose but I won’t do that. Monday I am going to try to get all the kids together at recess and tell them the plan.”

“There you go.”

“Thanks mommy.”

“Anytime sweetie, you know that.” You pulled him into a hug. “Don’t ever be scared to tell me what’s going on. It’s my number one job to make sure you are safe, healthy, and happy.”

“I know.”

“And I know that it scares you that I am going to go to that dark place again.” You ran her hand over his hair, breathing in that little boy scent that was fading far too quickly. “But I’m not. Mommy’s done a lot of work to get to a better place and I know what to do now if I’m feeling that way. I have my doctor just like you have yours and I can call her any time. I am not going to disappear on you again, okay?”

“Okay…I just don’t like to see you sad. And I feel like you’re always sad when we talk about Daddy.”

“I’m not always sad. But yes, sometimes it makes me sad because I miss him so much. Just like you do. But that doesn’t mean we can’t talk about him. We do that all the time. I tell you stories about him all the time. Because while it’s unfair that he was taken from us, we were so lucky to get to have him for the time we did.”

“I just wish he was still here. It sucks not having a daddy.”

“I know it does, baby.” You squeezed him harder, wishing you could make all that sadness disappear but unfortunately this was one thing you would never be able to fix for your son. “I know it does. But remember, you do have a daddy. Sadly, he’s not here anymore but you do have one. And he never would have chosen to leave you. He loved you more than anything in the world.”

“Even more than pizza?” Eli asked with a smile.

You laughed because you'd shared with your son how much his dad loved pizza. It was why they ordered it every Friday night. Justin had always wanted pizza. Even for his birthday dinner he would request pizza and you would tease him, telling him that wasn’t special because they’d just had it last week.

“Yeah, even more than pizza.”

The sound of the phone ringing broke up your moment and you pressed your finger gently to your son’s nose, earning a smile in return. Rising to your feet, you grabbed the cordless from the end table, pressing it against your ear. 

“Hello?”

“Hello dear. Is Eli there?” Judith asked sweetly and you handed your son the phone without even responding, making your way into the kitchen.  

“Hi grandma!”

His words flowed into the kitchen as you made yourself a cup of coffee. After your conversation with her just three days ago, you had nothing to say to Judith right now. Nothing that you trusted yourself to say anyway. The woman had immediately started in on you because Eli had told her that mommy had a boyfriend. The questions came shooting at you, one after another, so fast you couldn’t have answered them if you tried.

Who is this man?

How well do you know him?

Is he educated? Does he have a good job?

How long have you been seeing him?

Don’t you think it’s a bit soon for him to be meeting Eli?

It didn’t matter that you had told her that Eli had been friends with his son before you started dating. She wouldn’t listen to the fact that Steve was Eli’s baseball coach so he already knew him. Judith was already digging in her heels, convincing herself that this man would not be good enough to have around her grandson. And the cycle just continued itself with the focus on Steve now instead of you.

“Yeah. He said at least he has a dad and I don’t have one so I don’t know how to be a boy. But I told him that I was going to have a dad soon because Steve’s going to be my dad.”

The mug slipped from your fingers, smashing against the tile floor as your son’s words reached your ears.

“Mommy, what was that?” Eli called.

You stared down at the shards of ceramic, the creamy brown liquid spreading across the gray floor. Your hands shook as you robotically crouched down, grabbing at the pieces. You had to pick them all up before Eli came in. He couldn’t cut himself. Wrapping your hand around a large chunk, the letters apolis oo all that was left of the mug that Justin had bought you when the three of you had gone on a long weekend to Indy with Eli, visiting the zoo and the children’s museum. 

“Mommy?”

You stared at the letters as they slowly went fuzzy, your grasp on the piece tightening. 

“Mommy, you’re bleeding!” 

Your eyes moved to your hand, red trickling from within your closed fist, a slow scarlet river making its way over your wrist and down your arm to drop and mingle with the coffee on the floor. 

“I don’t know grandma. Mommy broke a mug and she’s bleeding.”

“I’m okay,” you finally managed, opening your hand to release the jagged piece of ceramic. Your son. You kept your focus on your son. “Just stay back, honey. I don’t want you to cut yourself.”

“Grandma wants to talk to you.”

“Well, I can’t talk right now. I need to clean this and myself up,” you stammered, standing up. Moving to the sink, you turned on the water, allowing it to run over the cut. It was deep but not so deep that it would require stitches. “Just go sit in the living room. I am going to wrap my hand and then I will clean this up.”

“Grandma, mommy can’t talk. She has to get a bandaid and clean,” Eli explained as he walked away.

Inhaling slowly, releasing the breath between pursed lips, you leaned against the sink. Jesus, this was just what you needed. Judith was going to have a field day with this one.

___________________________________________________________

“What should we do tonight?” Steve asked Jeremiah as they rode over to your house. 

He was watching the boys while you went out with all of the girls for a few hours. What had started as a casual suggestion at Eli’s party turned into a plan within the course of a couple days. Nancy had been the one to call him and tell him he needed to watch Eli for you because they were taking you out Friday night. He just hoped they all took it easy on you. He loved his friends but they could be a bit overwhelming, especially for someone who wasn’t used to them yet.

“I don’t know.” Jeremiah shrugged sadly, that despondent look still on his face that had been there since Steve had picked him up from school. “I’m not sure if Eli will even want to play with me. He wouldn't even talk to me after Brent said all that mean stuff. Do you think he’s mad at me?”

“No. Why would he be?”

“I don’t know.” The little boy sighed, the sound filling the interior of the car with his misery. “I didn’t say anything when Brent said all that stuff to him. I should have told him what a big fat meanie he is.”

“Well, why didn’t you?”

“Because he’s scary, Daddy. He says the meanest stuff all the time and he’s big. What if he wanted to fight me or something? I know I pretend to be a superhero but I’m not really one. I don’t think I could win.”

“Being a superhero isn’t about hitting somebody, Jere. Sometimes it’s just about using your words to let someone know that what they’re doing is wrong. It’s about doing the right thing even when it’s hard. And I know that can be scary because then they might start saying those mean things to you. But if you and Eli stand up to him together then you won’t be alone. He needs to know that what he said isn’t okay. It was a really horrible thing to say to someone who experienced a loss like Eli has.”

“I know. Daddy…?” Steve’s eyes caught Jere’s in the mirror as his son asked, “Will you go to heaven like Eli’s daddy did? Because I don’t want that to happen. I would be really sad if I didn’t have you.”

His heart sank faster than a rock in the lake. Everything in him wanted to promise his son that nothing like that would happen. But there were no guarantees in life. No he wasn’t in the military but life was not promised. One day you could be fine and the next you were gone, sometimes without any warning.

“Well, buddy. Everybody dies eventually. You know that. But I don’t do a dangerous job like Eli’s daddy did. And I am a pretty healthy guy. I eat all my vegetables and exercise. So, I don’t see that happening any time soon.”

“Good.” 

Jeremiah seemed satisfied with his answer and Steve was grateful for that. He hadn’t lied but he’d also assured him. And chances were he would be around for a long time but he couldn’t promise it. And he’d sworn to himself a long time ago that he wouldn’t promise his son anything that he couldn’t follow through on. The amount of broken promises that his parents had made to him as a kid could fill an Olympic sized swimming pool.

He pulled in the driveway and they were barely out of the car before Eli came racing out to grab Jere, much to his son’s surprise and joy, the two of them darting into the house and up to his room before Steve had even made it in the door. At least the kid seemed in better spirits. Whatever you had managed to do must have turned his mood around. 

When Eli had said he didn’t want to talk to Steve, it had damn near gutted him. He knew he hadn’t been around that long but he felt like he’d bonded with the kid already. Clearly not enough for him to turn to him for comfort yet but they’d get there. He chose to set it aside and believe that one day Eli would allow him to be that person for him. 

“Hey there.”

You came out of the kitchen, a smile on your face that didn’t quite turn up in the corners, tight and closed on your face. Eli’s mood may have been lifted but it appeared yours had taken a sudden plummet. He noticed your hand was wrapped up with white gauze and stepped toward you with concern. 

“What happened?”

“Oh, nothing. Just me being clumsy as usual.” You laughed, the sound hollow, not at all the usual melodic sound that he found so pleasant. “I dropped a mug and when I was cleaning up the pieces, I accidentally cut myself.”

“Is it deep? Do you need stitches?” He reached to take your hand but you stepped back.

“No, no.” You waved him off, grabbing your purse from the hook with your good hand and draping it over your shoulder. “It’s not deep at all. I cleaned it and everything. It’s fine.” Your eyes darted around before you made for the coffee table, grabbing your keys. “Anyway, there’s a frozen pizza in there if you want or whatever. You’re welcome to anything you can find in the kitchen. I don’t think I’ll be out too late.”

Steve snorted. “You’ve never hung out with this crowd. Robin will keep you there forever just talking.”

“Well, I’ll try not to be out too late so you can get Jeremiah home.”

He shrugged as every nerve ending in his body was firing, letting him know that something was going on here. Something was definitely wrong and you were doing your best to not show it but failing at it miserably. He could read it in the way your shoulders tensed up by your ears, the way you gripped your keys in your unbandaged hand until your knuckles were white, the forced way you were trying to sound casual but was anything but. 

“I don’t mind. He’s easy to haul. Once that kid is asleep he is dead to the world.” You went to move for the door and he placed his hand on your arm, stopping you. “Hey, did everything go okay with Eli earlier?”

You paused, the tip of your tongue running over your lip, “Uhh…yeah. I mean, he was sad but we talked about it. We talked about ways he could handle the situation and I think he’s feeling a lot better now that he has a plan.”

“Plan?”

“I told him to try to get all of the kids in class that this kid picks on to band together against him. If they tell him they won’t let him treat them like that and choose to stay away from him, who knows? Maybe that will be enough to change him. Bullies like that love attention and they love to get a reaction. If you take away their motivation, then it loses all the fun.”

“Huh…” Steve hadn’t ever really thought of that. He’d thought about teaching the boys some nasty comebacks or possibly even teaching them how to throw a punch. “How very diplomatic of you.”

“Well, I don’t want my son thinking violence solves everything. Besides, the kid has only used his words. As far as I know, he hasn’t put his hands on anyone. Mind you, they’re nasty words but you don’t have to put more evil into the world to win. I prefer to believe you can do that by being kind while also standing up for yourself. I want my son to set boundaries with people but I don’t want him swinging every time someone says something he doesn’t like.”

“No. I mean, that’s great. I just never thought of that. I mean, when I was in school, you always dealt with those people a certain way. You had to be faster with the insults or swing to show you were tougher.”

“Yeah and that’s the problem. You swing on someone when you’re an adult and you could find yourself in the back of a cop car.”

“Well…” He grinned, eyes rolling to the side with amusement. “Unless you happen to know the Chief of police.”

You stared at him, deadpan. “Even then punching someone like a neanderthal doesn’t solve anything. This world has enough violence in it. I would prefer my son didn’t add to it.”

“I get it. I’m just glad he talked to you.” Steve stuffed his hands in his pockets, looking down at his shoe as he toed it against the carpet. “He obviously didn’t want to talk to me.”

Your bandaged hand fell gently on his arm, “Please don’t let that bother you. You know he thinks the world of you. Eli adores you. He just…stuff with his dad is going to be tricky. I don’t know if he knows how to talk to you about that just yet. I know he’s told you what happened to Justin but…this is different. He was embarrassed. He felt like he didn’t know how to handle this kid because he didn’t have a dad to show him.”

“But he has one hell of a mom who knows exactly how to handle it,” Steve told you, one hand running over your bicep, the other settling on the side of your waist. He could feel that tension he’d been sensing since he’d walked in the door seeping from your body, your muscles releasing under his hands. It made him feel ten feet tall to know that just his touch could help you relax. 

“Maybe. That’s yet to be seen. I don’t want to have to storm up to the school and be all mama bear but it’s not beyond me. We’ll see if this plan works. If not, then the principal will definitely be hearing from me.” You glanced down at your watch and then reached up, your hands cradling his face. “Look, thank you. I mean it. It means so much to me that you care enough about Eli to try to help.”

“Of course I care about Eli. I love that kid, almost as much as…” 

He cut himself off, cursing himself. It had almost slipped out. Just that quickly he’d almost broken the rule he’d set for himself. The rule that he would not say it first. He would not push you. He didn’t want to make you feel like you had to say it back. He didn’t want to freak you out by moving too fast. 

But you knew. You knew exactly what was about to come out of his mouth. You stared at him, those lips like cotton candy parted in a perfect little o, those beautiful eyes like two big mirrors reflecting the panic he knew was written all over his face. Shit. Was this it? Were you going to run? Were you going to tell him this was all too much, too fast? You'd agreed to take it slow and he’d just revved the engine into high gear.

Taking a step back, your hand ran over your hair and you winced as your wound pressed against your scalp. Clearing your throat, you lifted your purse higher up on your shoulder. 

“Anyway, thanks. I uh…I should really get going. I’m supposed to meet the girls in fifteen minutes and I’m going to be late if I don’t leave right now.”

“Right. Yeah. Don’t wanna be late,” he stammered, suddenly unsure of himself, feeling like he was walking a tightrope, staring at the ground, seconds away from teetering too far to the left or right. 

“I shouldn’t be back late.”

“We’ll be here.”

Jesus. He had to get control of himself. The words came out way too high, syllables cracking like a prepubescent kid whose voice was changing. Trying to gain back some of his cool, he leaned, resting one hand on the wall, nodding and smiling at you. 

“I got this. Go have fun.”

“Right. I will. Yeah. Thanks…” you mumbled, reaching for the doorknob. 

“Hey.”

“Yeah?” You halted your rush to escape, glancing up at him. 

“Kiss goodbye?” he asked hopefully.

“Oh. Right.”

Leaning up on your toes, you pressed your lips to his. But instead of balancing him, it left him feeling like he was tilting, ready to crash. It was quick, forced, almost uncomfortable as if you were being told to kiss your uncle that you really didn’t want to.

“Umm…bye…”

And then you were out the door as it clicked closed behind you. Steve’s hand curled into a fist that he bounced against his forehead. 

“Idiot!” he muttered angrily.

____________________________________________________________

Your hands shook against the steering wheel as you drove toward Brewed Awakening. Had Steve really been about to say what you thought he was about to say? No. He couldn’t have been. It was probably just a slip of the tongue. He’d been talking about Eli. And who wouldn't love Eli? You might be biased but your son was very lovable. 

But you couldn't get it out of your head. If he felt that way did you feel that way too? Was he going to say it? If he did, would he expect you to say it back? Should you say it back? Should you say it first? Did you even want to say it yet?

Truly, Madly, Deeply by Savage Garden began playing on the radio and you quickly flicked the dial down. Your brain could not handle lyrics about dreaming someone into life right now. Hadn’t you thought the same exact thing about Steve? That he couldn’t be real. That you'd somehow wished him into existence because he was too perfect to actually exist?

Did you love him? That word had crossed your mind more than a few times when you'd been together, in fact as recently as this afternoon. But you weren't sure if you could trust your feelings. It had been so long since you'd been in a new relationship. Didn’t your brain release serotonin that could make you feel like it was love when it wasn’t? Or was lust clouding your emotions? Making you think you were feeling things you really wasn’t yet.

But what was love, really? At the most basic level it was an emotional bond that brought two people together. But there was nothing basic about love. Love was feeling like the dullest day was made more exciting just because you got to spend it with them. It was how every minute was made brighter by their mere presence. It was having someone that made the worst moments better just by being next to you. It was having someone you wanted to share everything with. It was missing them when they were away and wanting to spend every moment you could with them. It was knowing that you were safe. Love was realizing that home was not some structure made of four walls but a person. 

“Holy shit…” you breathed, your grip on the steering wheel so tight that your cut on your palm began to throb and you had to remind yourself to relax. “I love Steve…I am in love with Steve.”

The realization threatened to send you into a tailspin, wildly whirling out of control. You pulled into a parking space in front of the cafe and sat, staring out the windshield because you just couldn’t wrap your head around it. Somehow it had happened without you even truly realizing it. It had snuck up on you. Janice had asked you and you knew you felt a lot for him but you hadn’t allowed yourself to consider that word. It was too big for something that had just begun. 

Now what? Did you tell him? No. You couldn’t. You would wait for him to say it first. Steve had been with that crazy Janet lady who had latched on far too quickly. You didn’t want him thinking you were like that. No. You weren't even sure he’d been about to say it to you. You would wait. That was the right call. 

“Shit!” you screeched when someone banged on your window, jumping so high you almost hit your head on the ceiling of your car. Turning, you found Robin grinning at you. 

“Hey! What are you doing sitting in your car?”

Inhaling a long breath, you attempted to steady yourself. You had to set this life altering epiphany to the side for now until you could talk to Janet. You sure as hell were not divulging this information to Steve’s friends. Shutting off the car, you opened the door and stepped out. 

“Sorry.”

“Is everything alright? We were all waiting there for you. We saw your car but you weren’t getting out so I said I would check on you. You appeared to be deeply lost in your own thoughts.”

“Yeah. Everything’s fine.” You grasped for an excuse and realized you already had a ready made one. “Eli’s just having some issues with a boy at school and he was really upset about it today.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Robin replied as you headed into the cafe. The other girls were already at a table, smiling and waving when they saw you. 

“Hey. We thought maybe you were scared to come in after I told you we wanted all your deep, dark secrets,” Max teased with a laugh. “You know I was joking, right?”

“Yeah. No, I wasn’t scared.”

“Some kid’s being a dick to Eli and he was sad,” Robin explained for you as you took a seat. 

“I didn’t say anyone was being a dick.”

“Well, it was implied,” Robin replied, tracing her finger over the swirls of the pattern on top of the table. “I assume he was upset because some asshat was being a bully. Trust me, I can read between the lines.” She pointed to herself. “I was a band geek in high school. I’ve dealt with my fair share of assholes.”

Nancy leaned in, hands cupped together on the table. “What happened?”

Your cheeks puffed up before you blew out a long breath. “This kid and him got into an argument on the playground. The kid was saying that him and Jeremiah were gay for each other because they wear capes and run around. Eli got mad and told him he’d rather be gay than be a jerk.”

“Oh, nice comeback! I love your kid!” Max grinned.

“Yeah. Well, then this kid said at least he still had a dad and that Eli acted the way he did because he doesn’t have a dad to show him how to be a real boy.”

Nancy’s jaw dropped, “He didn’t!”

“That’s so mean,” El added softly, hands tucked into the sleeves of her shirt, fingers playing with the edges. 

“It’s also bullshit. Eli has a dad. He just passed away. He didn’t take off or leave,” Max muttered. “What a little dick. Eli should have punched him right in the face.”

“Now you’re sounding like Steve,” you sighed, shaking your head. You picked up a napkin, pulling at the edges in an attempt to keep herself calm. “I don’t want my son to hit people. I want him to learn how to use his words to stand up for himself. We have a plan. He’s going to try it and if that doesn’t work then I’ll go up to the school myself.”

“Steve? Steve, who lost a fight against Billy Hargrove in high school wants to show someone else how to fight?” snorted Robin. 

“Billy Hargrove?”

Max sighed deeply with a roll of her eyes, “My step-brother who was a complete ass in high school. He didn’t like that I was hanging around Lucas. I was…having a hard time. My parents had split and then my mom moved me from California to here. It was nothing like what I knew. Some small boring town in the middle of nowhere without a real beach. And she’d moved me away from my dad. I snuck out one night to see Lucas and my mom was worried. My step-dad, who was a total dick, sent Billy to find me. He wound up at Mike’s house where we were all hanging and Steve was there with Nancy. Billy grabbed Lucas by the shirt and slammed him against the wall and Steve tried to protect him. Unfortunately he got his ass beat instead. Billy wasn’t really the kind of guy you wanted to mess with. He could be scary.”

“He attacked a kid?” you questioned. You didn’t want to offend Max by insulting her brother but what kind of jerk attacked a child who was probably less than half their size?

“Yeah. He was angry…really angry. All the time. He hated moving from California, too, and he blamed my mom for it. He couldn’t take it out on her because Neil would have kicked his ass so he took it out on me instead.”

“Damn. That’s still no reason to hurt a kid.”

“Well, there was a lot of other shit too. His dad was mean. He hurt Billy a lot. He used to beat up Billy’s mom and one day she couldn’t take it anymore and she left but she didn’t take him with her. He always felt like she’d abandoned him because then Neil had no one else to loose his fury on. Billy became his punching bag. He wasn’t allowed to show any kind of emotion because that’s not what boys did.”

This guy sounded awful. No wonder his son had grown into such a jerk. You weren't excusing his behavior but when that was all he’d known…it painted a little different picture. Still, people had choices in life and regardless of how you were raised, you could either choose to break the cycle or continue it.

“Is he still like that?”

“No,” Max answered with a smile. “Actually, you wouldn’t even recognize him if you’d known him back then. Our parents split. Not surprising given that their relationship was toxic as hell. I was relieved to have Neil out of the house but my mom had a really hard time for a while. She had to work two jobs just to keep us afloat and we had to move into this run-down trailer. It got really bad for a while but I kept telling myself it would get better. Billy and Neil had moved away. I didn’t know where. Then one day, out of nowhere, Billy showed up on our doorstep.”

“Yeah, Lucas told me he almost pissed himself when he opened the door and saw him,” El chuckled. 

Max snorted, “Yeah. Well, Billy hadn’t exactly left the best impression. Anyway, the minute he’d turned eighteen he took off. He didn’t know where else to go. So even though he’d blamed us for all of his problems, there he was. My mom took him in. He got a job as a bartender and helped out with rent and groceries. I finally convinced him to go talk to someone, a shrink, you know? I had been talking to the school counselor and at first I hated it. I shut down. I refused to tell her anything but finally I opened up and it did me a lot of good. I thought it would do him good too.”

“Did it help?” you inquired, suddenly feeling invested in this guy you didn’t even know. 

“Yeah. It did,” she answered proudly, nodding. “He’s married now. The girl he’s with, Val, she’s amazing. She’s really good for him. They have three kids and live back in California. We talk on the phone every week and he seems really happy. If you would have told me back then that one day I would be proud to say Billy Hargrove is my brother I would have told you that you were insane. I hated him. I wanted nothing more than for him to go away but I think we both were just so broken we couldn’t see how hurt each other was. If we would have turned to each other instead of pushing each other away maybe things would have been different back then. But he’s turned out to be a good person in spite of how he was raised.”

“Wow. That’s amazing. It takes a pretty strong person to pull themselves out of the darkness like that.”

“Steve’s still not his biggest fan,” joked Nancy.

“Well, he gave him a broken nose and a black eye,” Robin stated, instantly rising to Steve’s defense. “Can you blame him?”

“Hey ladies! What can I get for you?”

Robin’s face drained of all color, her skin resembling a sheet of paper as June appeared at their table. She wore the customary red apron and held a pad of paper in their hand. You noticed how her eyes went straight to Robin but Robin suddenly became very interested in the menu, snatching it from the table and holding it so closely you’d think she’d forgotten her glasses even though she didn’t wear any. 

“Hey June!” you greeted brightly. “Can I have the chicken salad and an iced hazelnut coffee?”

“Chicken salad, huh? I was sure you were going for the turkey pesto.”

You shrugged, “I figured I would switch it up. The fact is every sandwich you make is delicious. Don’t you think, Robin?”

“Huh?” Robin mumbled, her eyes as wide as saucers as she peered at you over the top of the menu. “Oh. Yeah. I mean you’re delicious.” She squeaked, the color rapidly returning to her cheeks in a blaze of brilliant red. “I mean, you make delicious things. Coffee…food…sandwiches. Yeah. So good.”

June’s lips pressed together, concealing a smile that you knew was there. Yeah, she definitely thought Robin was cute. Now you all just had to get Robin to be brave enough to make a move. Or somehow get June to do it.

“Thanks Robin. My sandwiches are pretty good.” She grinned, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “Of course, I have been told that I’m a pretty nice snack too.”

Oh damn. Maybe you guys wouldn’t need to intervene in any way. Robin gasped, her shoulders drooping forward as if she thought she could disappear. Make herself as small as possible so June wouldn’t be able to see her anymore. 

“Robin loves snacks,” Max said with a mischievous grin.

Nancy nodded, “Yes she does. You know where they have great snacks? The movie theater. Who doesn’t love that delicious buttered popcorn? Or a pack of M&Ms. And I hear Slums of Beverly Hills is playing this weekend. You wanted to see that movie, didn’t you Robin?”

Robin nodded, the move barely perceptible, holding the menu so tightly you were surprised it didn’t tear in half.

“Yeah. It’s too bad we’re all busy this weekend,” El sighed. “We wouldn’t want you to miss out.” Whipping around in her chair, she smiled up at June. “June, would you happen to be free this weekend? Say…oh, I don’t know. Tomorrow night around seven?”

Her lips curved up on one side, the pen in her hand tapping against her chin. “Actually, I am.”

“Huh. How convenient,” Max gasped, reaching into her pocket. “And would you look at that? We’ve got tickets and everything.” She slid one across the table to June as Robin sat as still as a statue. “Why don’t you meet Robin in front of the movie theater?”

“Yeah. Definitely!” June bounced on her heels, looking down at Robin. “I mean, if you want me to come with you.”

Robin jumped, her eyes finally looking up at the raven haired beauty who was waiting anxiously for her answer. You nudged her with your toe under the table and she finally opened her mouth but no sound came out. She resorted to nodding. 

“Is that a yes?” urged June. 

“Yes!” Robin shrieked, causing all of them to jump. The poor girl winced, her fingers curling into a fist. “I mean, yes. That would be okay. No. I mean, that would be great. I would love…I mean, I would really like it if you came with me.”

“Okay. Great!” June took the rest of their orders, unable to keep the smile off her face, stretching from one end to the other. It was so damn adorable that you could scream. Robin had no reason to be nervous. This girl was definitely into her. She’d just been waiting for Robin to show the same interest. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

She winked at Robin before she walked away and the girl melted down in her chair, almost dribbling off of it and onto the floor as the tension dissipated from her body.

“You did it! You finally did it!” Nancy squealed, grabbing her arm excitedly. 

“I didn’t do anything!” she protested, glaring over at Max. “You all did this. You conniving little sneaks! You even bought tickets already? What if she’d said no?”

Max shrugged, “She wasn’t going to. But even if she did then I would have gone with you, you dork.”

“I thought you were all busy,” accused Robin, glaring at each of them in turn.

“Of course we’re not,” El laughed. “But we knew you’d never have the guts to actually say something to her. So, we came up with a plan to help you.”

“I didn’t need help.” Robin’s arms folded stubbornly like a child.

You laughed, ‘Oh girl, I hate to tell you but you absolutely needed help.”

“I hate all of you. Well, maybe not you." She pointed to you and then her eyes narrowed. "Unless you were in on it too.”

You held your hands up in front of you, “I knew nothing about any of this but I do approve of it.”

“And you don’t hate us,” Max grinned, placing her head on Robin’s shoulder. “You love us and you’ll love us even more when all of this goes well and you’re all in love and gross like the rest of us.”

Your stomach clenched at that word and you quickly looked down at your silverware, toying with the spoon. You couldn’t allow any of them a chance to see what was turning you inside out written all over your face.

“That remains to be seen. I still have to make it through this date. How am I supposed to talk to her without all of you? I barely managed a complete sentence with you all here.”

“You can do this,” El said, placing her hand over her friend’s. “I have faith in you. Just be yourself.”

“Myself!? Are you kidding me? Have you met me?”

“Yes,” Nancy stated, “we have and we all love you. June will too. Just try to relax. You get in your head and think you have to impress but all you do is freak yourself out and act all weird. Just let her see you because she is going to love you. I know it.”

“And if she doesn’t, I can always have Billy come talk to her. It worked with Lucas when he was being a turd,” Max joked and they all laughed. 

“You have a date!” you cried with a smile.

“I have a date!” Robin agreed, looking far less enthused than the rest of them. In fact, the poor girl looked downright terrified.

Chapter 15

Taglist: @katethetank@roxiehorrorshow@sapphire4082@bakugouswh0r3@frostandflamesfanfic @mix-matchsocks @mushy-mushroom04 @palmtreesx3 @littlebookworm86 @eddies-trailer-babe @cheesewritings @emilyj444 @daisyhollyxox @angelbabyivy @the-fairy-anon @loritate7311 @k-k0129

Thanks so much for taking the time to read my little story! Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist. 😊 And replies and reblogs are always appreciated if you enjoy it. ❤️❤️❤️

#dad steve harrington #steve harrington #singledad!steveharrington #steve harrington single dad #steve harrington fanfiction #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington smut #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington x fem #steve harrington x you #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington imagine #fluff #smut #fluff and smut #romance #second chance romance #second chance at love #widow #divorced dad steve harrington #slow burn #robin buckley #robin and steve #dustin henderson #max mayfield #mike wheeler #eleven hopper

[kindestofkings]

photography era [3]

elijah hewson x reader

reader is childhood bestfriends/ who doubles up as their occasional photographer, who is currently touring with the band!

authors note: hahahah I litch was like im gonna make a short little part 3 just to wrap this idea off and then next minute im reaching the pic limit, anyway I think it turned out cute so enjoy !

I really appreciate all the love i've received with my last insta au's y'all are the best <3

(PS: Picture credits to whoever took them)

yourusername posted on their story:

replies

inhalerfan1 feeding us ryan girlies off the bat, appreciate you <;3 lewevans hahaha wait until they get moody and tired.. -> they're gonna get WORSE??

inhalerdublin

liked by bobbyskeetz and others

inhalerdublin Thank you Lille for kicking off our EU tour.

We’re back in Amsterdam tonight for our biggest show so far at @afaslive

📸 yourusername

view all 600 comments

inhalerfan1 AMAZING SHOW!! the post concert depression is too real rn..

inhalerfan2 hiring yourusername was your best decision yet boys these pics are so hot

inhalerfan1 inhaler through the female gaze has righted all the worlds wrongs (liked by elijahhewson,bobbyskeetz, ryanmcmahon_15 and joshjenkinson_)

inhalerfan3 bobby girls we're being FED

yourusername I got you girlie xx

yourusername great evening !! but I am realising im touring with 4 boys for two months.. @nieveella y'all need a photographer??

(liked by nievella) bobbyskeetz why are you always tryna get rid of us.. yourusername try listening to your 12 year old boy humour 24/7 this is a hardship !

yourusername

liked by evehewson and others

yourusername guys i'm a failure, E still hasn't agreed to cover I'm Just Ken 😭 What is the point of having friends that can sing if they wont take my requests 💔

view all 200 comments

inhaler1 you are the gift that keeps on giving

inhaler2 for real get a girl who can do both

joshjenkinson_ I was gonna be pressed but i'll let it slide cause of my caption

bobbyskeetz you need to be stopped. @elijahhewson MAKE HER STOP

yourusername wah wah wah hush elijahhewson love come on yourusername heyyy its funny!

evehewson hahah you are the best ever

yourusername and you are my favourite hewson! inhaler3 inlaw bonding? inhaler2 girl chill

yourusername posted on their story:

(liked by elijahhewson,bobbyskeetz, ryanmcmahon_15 and joshjenkinson_)

-filling this dramatic fella with drink to get back in his good books

yourusername

liked by inhalerdublin and others

yourusername please take these photos of the boys as an apology for my last post. they are very serious musicians and are very handsome. again sorry for any upset caused.

view all 100 comments

inhalerfan3 hahahahahhah who is holding the gun to your head rn girl?

yourusername im sure I dont know what you could possibly mean (totally unrelated robert keating can be kinda scary)

bobbyskeetz now that is more like it

yourusername @bobbyskeetz @elijahhewson am I forgiven yet? can I come for pints now

ryanmcmahon_15 I think your last post ..slayed? yourusername THIS is why your my favourite and why you had first spot in the post 🖤 inhalerfan3 hahah did you choose the order based on who you like the most rn yourusername @inhalerfan3 👁👄👁

inhalerfanupdates

liked by inhalerfan2 and others

inhalerfanupdates GUYS I'm just back from my inhaler show and im shaking look at this pic yourusername took of my friend and I with eli! BEST. NIGHT. EVER.

view all 10 comments

inhalerfan 1 no way that is adorable, yourusername is one of us with the 0.5

inhalerfanupdates she was literally so nice aswell! they had walked by us so fast and I think I was so visibly upset, which she spotted and made eli come back over to us! inhalerfanupdates she was also chatting to us for a little while after, talking about tour and all she comes across real genuine <3

inhalerfan2 they're dating right??

inhalerfanupdates I really think so after seeing them walk and interact together. its been so hard to tell cause shes always joking and is so close with them all. inhalerfan3 they have to be dating they're my parents.

yourusername

liked by inhalerfan2 and others

yourusername Europe 1 Three amigos 0

view all 200 comments

inhalerfan 4 you are literally traveling around europe, freeloading off your famous friends. so so ungrateful god

inhalerfan2 hate to break this to you but being mean to one of his best friends / photographer is not going to get Eli to date you! inhalerfan3 haha girl no need to be so meannnn

elijahhewson I told you we should've skipped drinks

yourusername it was for the plot hotstuff (liked by bobbyskeetz)

bobbyskeetz why is the world so loud??

ryanmcmahon_15 *three idiots

(liked by joshjenkinson_ and others)

lewevans told you they get tired and moody

yourusername oh wise man 😭😭 you were so right

inhalerdublin

liked by elijahhewson and others

inhalerdublin she loves to joke around and despite what bobby says, its the very reason we love her.

but our photographer for the europe leg/ our bestfriend yourusername is flat out working, making sure we look our best and coolest, we remind you to be kind in your comments towards her - eli, ryan, bobby and josh <3

comments have been restricted

yourusername BOYS im so unwell this is so sweet

joshjenkinson_ the GOAT

ryanmcmahon_15 ❤️‍🔥

elijahhewson our girl!

bobbyskeetz also she plays taylor swift on repeat when shes sad so please, i can't hear this is me trying again

yourusername we can't listen to the strokes all the damn time robert! yourusername also you asked about the folklore love triangle so stfu

yourusername

liked by ryanmcmahon_15 and others

yourusername been great annoying bobby with pda for the last 3 years with you <3

have loved tagging along on my superhot boyfriend on tour and taking super hot (and super not) pictures of him! only a few more shows left xx

tagged: elijahhewson

view all 400 comments

elijahhewson 3 years but i'm still not your favourite singer 💔

yourusername write an album like notes on a conditional form and you can take that top spot baby <;3 inhaler1 babyyyyy i love them your honour

bobbyskeetz great the world knows, can you stop kissing in front of us now.

yourusername just say you're lonely, it'd be quicker xx inhaler2 LMAO i love their friendship

evehewson wait I thought I was your favourite hewson...

yourusername course you are, this is a pr xx elijahhewson 🙃🙃 yourusername 😅😅

inhalerfan3 brb just gonna go take a bath with my toaster xx

joshjenkinson_ the hardest of launches

yourusername litch dont have the energy to lie anymore loll

---- finito----

if you made it this far I love and appreciate you so much! all the forehead kisses xx

#inhaler band #elijah hewson fanfic #elijah hewson imagine #elijah hewson x reader #fake instagram #inhaler dublin

[bartxnhood]

3am | e.m

| eli (hawk) moskowitz x reader

warnings: s4 spoilers lol, uh crying ? that’s abt it. angst & fluff !

summary: its late and eli had to see you. he felt so lost, but once he was able to hug you he finally felt like he was at home.

authors note: hi babes ! i’m so sorry for being away. my mental health has been at an all time low recently. i plan to slowly get back in the groove of writhing again. but ! this is my first cobra kai blurb. i decided to post something short and see how well it does. (plus i just love eli w my whole heart). enjoy !! feedback is appreciated ! 🤍

(requests open)

Copyright © 2022 bartxnhood. All rights reserved. This original work is not allowed to be reposted on any platform in any format.

✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵ ✵

the constant tapping on your window was bound to wake you up, it was getting repetitive and annoying. with a quiet huff, you turned your phone on to check the time.

3:20 am

you ripped your blankets off your legs and walked to your window where the tapping continued. you opened the window carefully, then spotted eli. this wasn’t uncommon but he never came this late in the night. he stood there staring back at you with puffy eyes, which you hadn’t seen from him in a long time.

“eli? it’s three in the morning” you rubbed your eyes, still trying to wake up to make sense of the situation. “i know, can i come in?” his voice was quiet, just loud enough for you to make out what he said. you nodded, standing to the side allowing him in.

“what’s going on? you look disturbed.” you closed the window behind him, keeping all the cool air inside. he had sat on the edge of your bed, fidgeting with his fingers. “i can't sleep. tried everything” he shrugged your question off, avoiding confrontation. he averted his gaze, refusing to look at you. anything but you. “you can't lie to me. i’ve known you for years.” you took a few steps closer to him, “what’s really going on?” you hummed, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder.

he looked down contemplating his choice of words or if he should just rip the hoodie off. hesitantly, eli brought his hand up and removed the hood covering what once was his famous mohawk.

instantly you removed your hand from his shoulder to your mouth. a quiet gasp escaped your lips. “eli..my god” you whispered. “when…who..” you hesitated, putting your hand on his shoulder again.

“robby..” his voice breaking as he answered. you were quick to bend down and wrap your arms around him, which is exactly what he wanted. you.

“i’m so sorry.” you hummed softly, placing a gentle kiss on the top of his head. eli could feel tears threatening to fall, he hadn’t been this vulnerable in a very long time. way before he had met you. but now, he never felt more lost. “i just don’t know what to do. or who i am.the mohawk kept the attention away from my scar.” he sniffles, which caused you to pull away and bring a hand to his chin bring his face to meet yours. “eli. you’re eli, you’re hawk. you are the boy i fell in love with. a hairstyle doesn’t define you.” he nodded, wrapping his arms around you again. “just promise you won’t leave me?” he murmured, pressing his head against your stomach.

hearing that only made your heart shatter. “eli..i could never.” you replied. “nothing is gonna happen to us. i promise.” your chin rested on his head, rubbing his back. “can i stay with you tonight? i don’t want to be alone.”

you took a quick glance at the clock, it was now nearing four am. “my parents are out of town for the week. so it’ll be okay. ” he nodded, “if you don’t mind.” you shook your head, finally

“everything will be okay, eli. i promise.” you smiled, reassuring him. “it’ll work out, i’ll be in your corner no matter what.” now, eli was feeling better now that he was holding you. you made all of his worries fade away in an instant. “thank you, y/n. i can always count on you” he shared, pressing a kiss on your temple and drawing circles on your back.

it didn’t take long for the both of you to pass out cold. it had always been the two of you and it will always be the two of you. no matter what obstacles life throws at you.

#eli moskowitz x reader #eli moskowitz #eli moskowitz x y/n #eli moskowitz imagine #hawk x reader #hawk imagine #cobra kai x reader #cobra kai #hawk cobra kai #cobra kai imagine #tory x reader #robby keene x reader #robby keene

[sandwichfordinner]

Hi its strawberry anon once again >:3, Eli (my bbg real), Ganji, Edgar and Norton with a S/o who wears cute outfits but hella strong? Like strong enough to probably lift a car if they want. (Also take care of yourself and eat well!)

Eli, Ganji, Edgar and Norton with a strong s/o who has a cute clothing style too ᶻ 𝘇 𐰁 🔔 (female reader)

Strawberry anon hello again! Also thank you for the kindness I appreciate it! I don’t think the last ones turned out great I am not sure because I was out of ideas, so sorry

Eli

Now we all know Eli, a calm, intelligent and clever man who promised to himself to not date at the moment ESPECIALLY when he is trapped in this nightmare-

Oh nvm…. uh.. remember how is said like 5 seconds ago he kept his promise? Yeahhh.. well… about that!

He has now a pretty girlfriend that has the best style of clothing! Amazing, spectacular, brilliant, ate the whole table-

The two of you being silly and happy , when you suddenly turn the tables which shocked Eli and Brooke till this day.

YOU?? BEATING A HUNTER???? 😨HOW ARE YOU SO STRONG?

No way… Tries to use words instead of touching you but if you have anger issues he will be on panic mode and scared. But he shouldn’t worry, because later on he will get used to it and will be taking lots of notes.

Ganji

You are so lucky that Ganji has fallen for you.. He didn’t search for your look,,, but… the way you are so strong amazes him.. You’re perfect..

Also likes your clothing style, while he is a poor little guy.

Do you know how he fell even harder for you???

When he couldn’t run because his legs gave up in Moonlit River Park and you carried him in bridal style. AND YOU WERE HUGGING HIM CLOSELY which left him looking away trying not to make eye contact with you..

If you’re beating the absolute shit of someone he will quickly try to pull you away cursing under his breath. He barely got you out of this situation😭

He is still so thankful that you’re his girlfriend, so you sometimes lift him in bridal style to tease him which ALWAYS works to make him blush

Edgar

An irritating painter falling in love with a peasant????? Please love is the last thing he actually cares about! Love is nonsense.

But when he saw you how surprisingly strong you are he was confused. Confused about all of this situation, first you dress so much differently from the others and you are even stronger than some hunters?? How is this even possible? If you’re extroverted enough to annoy him he will fall in love with you somehow.

And there it is. A boyfriend that is 0% strong and 1000% girlfriend that is stronger but cheerful. I can just imagine you giving him a kiss on the cheek, which makes him blushy and Joseph disturbs you two but you just somehow twist the sword with your hand. And this leaves the photographer and painter flabbergasted.

Norton

So confused . How do you even do it???

You know that Norton loves jewels, but you have never been in the mines because of the incident he experienced. Don’t remind him of it please..

,,*sigh* I wished I could’ve had money or diamonds.. something shiny and good…-‘’

You literally crashed your hand into a big rock, and searched until you felt something smooth. You smiled and got your hand out of the big rock, and to his surprise you were holding a bunch of small kimberlite which one costs like 50$ (and you know back when things weren’t expensive as now, and 50$ WAS A LOT I think). Please his reaction was priceless. HOW ON EARTH DID YOU KNOW THERE WAS KIMBERLITE IN THIS BIG ROCK AND HOW DID YOU EVEN SMASH YOUR HAND INSIDE OF THAT ROCK??? HAVENT YOU BROKE IT??

if you two are in the mines, Norton is having bad flashbacks while you crash your hands in the rocks to find anything: iron, gold, coal. Anything that would make him happy.

,,Hey Nort look I found a.. diamond!!!-‘’

,,That’s great honey’’ Literally doesn’t pay attention so you better quickly get him out of here..

#identity v x reader #idv x reader #sandwichfordinner #idv hcs #identity v x you #identity v headcanons #identity v oneshots #identity v eli clark #eli x reader #eli clark idv #eli clark x reader #eli clark #identity v seer #seer idv #idv seer #ganji gutpa x reader #identity v ganji #idv ganji #ganji gupta #ganji x reader #idv batter #edgar valden x reader #idv edgar valden x reader #idv edgar valden #edgar valden #identity v painter #idv painter #painter idv #norton campbell x reader #norton x reader

[vibratingskull]

The Ball part 1

Part1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

Tag list

ThrawnxF!reader

It is time for the ball, time to enjoy yourself before taking your responsabilities in the Marine, maybe time to try your luck with Thrawn. What could go wrong anyway?

You look at your reflection in the minuscule mirror of your shared room in the Academy. You rotate yourself to inspect your gown for this special evening. Karyn has really good taste, the claret-red dress is simple yet elegant, fitting with open shoulders, laces in the back and a silver vine embroidered at the cloth’s feet. 

"Thanks again for the dress." You tell her across the room while checking your makeup. 

"You're welcome!Show me when you are ready!" 

You stomp your foot to test your shoes and feel a tingle of pain. Your wound from the exam didn't heal completely it seems, you’ll need to be cautious but it will do for tonight.

"Prepare to be amazed… Ta-daaa!" 

You theatrically push the door to reveal yourself in a model pose. You've really outdone yourself this time, you managed to strike a balance between your favorite look and what was deemed appropriate for such a high-class event. Karyn raises her head from her luggage and her eyes widen, she offers you her hand to make you turn on yourself to see every detail. 

"Verdict?" you ask, hopefully.

"Wow… You are striking!"

"Thank you, fair Lady." You respond mimicking her reverence. You turn back to the mirror once again with bubbles in your stomach. "Is everything alright?" 

"Your makeup is perfect. Your hair is gorgeous. Let me check your back." You feel her pulling and the laces bite your flesh. "The knots are well tightened. You're ready for-- The pin!"

She grabs a little jewelry on your desk and comes back to carefully attach it on the left of your chest. You observe the insignia of the Royal Imperial Academy engraved in a chromed metal. It isn't exactly pleasing to look at, but it is this pin or the uniform.

"I wish I could have come with you tonight. It won't be the same now that you have finished your training." She tells you with a drop of disappointment in her voice.

You put her in a hug. You realize it will be difficult to see each other from now on. She still has two years here in the Academy while everyone in your class has learned their assignment. 

"Ho sweetheart, I would have loved it too. Parties are always more fun when you are around! In two years you too will have the privilege to attend this pompous party and put up with the Gotha." 

You both laugh and hug one another, appreciating the presence of your friend one last time. Outside a humming is getting clearer, indicating shuttles for the Opera House are starting to arrive.

She motions her head towards the door. 

"The shuttles must be ready. You should go."

You get your purse and a satin shawl, and hug her one last time. 

"We’ll stay in contact. If someone annoys you I’ll come back to give them a lesson."

"Yes, mom! Now leave or they’ll go without you."

You wave a last goodbye and join the rest of your comrades in the elevator. Everyone is dressed-up, all the women in dresses are wearing high quality fabrics, not to mention elaborate jewelry and expensive perfumes which threaten to overwhelm your nose in the cramped elevator. Unfortunately, the pin clashes with most of their attire. All the the men and some of the women are wearing a black variation of the military uniform, with an addition of golden and white embroideries on the pants, the cuffs and the collar and golden epaulets.

Everyone is terribly nervous.

Tonight, under the eyes of their families and all the top names of Coruscant, they will take their first step into High Society. The pressure must be unbearable. As for you and the other Outer Rim students you will surely spend this night dancing, drinking and eating the most elaborate dishes at the expense of the rich and, maybe, finding new relationships with the well-born and other high officiers, depending on your state of sobriety.

You are sure Eli and Thrawn will be carrying you back. You can already hear Eli's lectures about alcohol and how careless you are. Thrawn will only sigh silently but help regardless, saving the scolding for tomorrow while you will laugh and cluck, taking them both in your arms crying about the idea of being separated and how much you will miss them, like a bad holodrama. This idea makes you giggle internally. You hadn’t seen the duo since the graduation ceremony, you hope they got the placement they asked for.

You step out of the elevator with your classmates. Some of them go straight outside to enter the shuttles whereas the others gather with their group of friends or date. You recognize some of the couples. The divide between those there of their own free will vs. the will of their parents was obvious by their expressions.

Your two favorite calamities are not in sight, they must be on the docks. 

Passing the door of the Academy, a fresh breeze comes caressing your skin cooling down the planet city's heat. You approach the end of the platform and take a moment to observe the lights of the skyscrapers and holos, to hear the sounds of the population living and laughing all around you, feeling the heart of the city beating.

Heading toward the docks, you finally see the duo outside of an open shuttle. They look like high generals in their regalia. Eli even coiffed his mane behind his head. It must have been difficult to comb but the result was worth it. 

Thrawn didn’t change his hairstyle but the black fabric and golden intricacies give him a majestic appearance, contrasting with the blue of his skin that seems to glow in the moonlight. His usual formal demeanor enhances his dignified and assured look. He really is handsome.

As you approach them, you feel a weird tension coming from them. Thrawn stands straight as is his habit with his hands clasped behind his back, but appears stiffer than usual, while Eli is leaning against the ship, arms crossed. Did they have an argument? You really want to enjoy this party. It will be difficult enough with egocentric toffs, howler politicians and ISB members. Your friends can’t be fighting on top of all of that. 

"Well hello, good sirs. What are two fine gentlemans such as yourself doing this lovely evening?” You ask as you bow to them with a smile, trying to ease the mood 

Thrawn snaps out of his mutism upon hearing your voice, as he visibly relaxes. Eli raises his head with a relieved sigh. He jumps to offer you his hands, bowing to you, keeping up the act. 

"We were waiting for a fair Lady to escort. She finally decides to honor us with her presence." 

He winks at you and conducts you to the shuttle. Eli enters first and scowls at Thrawn as he passes him.

Ever the stoic, Thrawn doesn’t address the hostile behavior. He simply tilts his head with a light smile as you approach. 

"Lady (y/f/n)." He greets you with his soft baritone. 

"Lieutenant Thrawn." You respond, gladly acknowledging his effort to play along. 

You take the hand he gallantly offers and enter the shuttle.

It is elegantly decorated with white walls and padded seats in creamy shades. The bulbs provide just enough light to illuminate and give a softened and warm atmosphere. The ship is also divided into compartments with frosted transparisteel, which give groups a little privacy. 

You hear Thrawn follow and close the door of the capsule. You both take a seat with Eli, already checking the programm for the party.

You take a seat just as the shuttle takes off with a buzzing sound. You press yourself against the viewport to see the city blurred by the speed. You have always liked to see the lights blend while being lulled by the quiet purring of the motors. The first minutes pass in silence, with you mesmerized by the lights, Eli staring into the distance and Thrawn silently reviewing the shuttle’s flyer on cultural destinations.

You switch back your attention when Eli grumbles. 

"Why do we have to go anyway?" 

"For the Gotha to present their new members and for the Empire to display their new loyal officers." You respond half joking. "But forget them, tonight we are here to enjoy ourselves. Where are you assigned?" You ask cheerfully. 

Eli's face darkens and he slouches into his seat, arms crossed. Thrawn glances at him before answering you. 

"We have been assigned to the Blood Crow around the border sectors."

"Together? That's amazing! Did you both get the position you wanted?" 

Eli scoffs at this.

"Can we talk about something else?"

"And you?” Thrawn asked. “What will be your new duties?" 

"I am now a Private First Class on the Zephyr Heavy cruiser."

Spirit seems to regain Eli as his eyes get shiny. 

"The Zephyr? I know this ship, it regularly asks for my parents' services."

You squeeze Eli's hands with enthusiasm. 

"Really? I may get the chance to meet them, then. I didn’t get to the other day."

Thrawn however, mildly frowns at this information.

"Private companies can obtain business deals with Imperial structures? Why not just use its own network?" 

"Never heard about Imperial contracts? You will need to catch-up with more than just military technicalities if you want anything to get done here." Eli's hands clench in yours as he spits his response. You've never seen him so openly hostile toward Thrawn.

"I will study those aspects, thank you for sharing this information."

"Do what you want, as always." Eli slowly hissed while looking away from Thrawn.

Your heart stops at this answer and your blood freezes at Thrawn's expression. His face warps as an underlying anger starts to pierce the surface. You decide to interject before it escalates.

"Well, I don't know what you are both up to tonight, but the pair of you owe me a dance !" 

They both slowly turn their heads toward you with surprise. It is almost comic.

You grin. "Listen boys, I know you won't likely take part in any waltz at this party, but I didn’t take two months of my time to teach you how to dance for you to be wallflowers. Consider this repayment for the lessons."

"You wouldn't dare do that to us," Eli pleads. 

"You bet I would!" You close this matter with a satisfied grin. 

-------------

The Galaxies Opera House is nothing less than breathtaking, with its multiple domes, its intricate circuits of corridors and suspended bridges leading to innumerables rooms and auditoriums. Anybody would feel tiny and insignificant next to this colossus. 

You stand before it in awe. You've only seen it through the media that didn’t do it justice. On your left Eli lets escape an impressed whistle with his hand shielding his eyes. On your right Thrawn scans the edifice, surely in hope to spot a pattern.

While you are admiring the surroundings part of the crowd moves inside the Opera, composed of your classmates, some of your teachers, a number of local celebrities, governors, senators, councilors, and magistrates. You spot at least two Admirals and, most to your misfortune, several ISB members. You will need to be cautious around them.

Despite the security put in place, a large group of bystanders came to see the cream of Coruscant on a red carpet and several students started posing in pairs with excitement; others waved towards the journalists behind red ropes while climbing the stairs, and at least five are joined by their famous relatives under the whistles and cheers of the onlookers.

Others are only here to display their fortune and it shows, with multiples expensives layers of fabrics puffing them up like cream cakes, an embroidered train of several meters lazily dragging behind it's owner, a Lady wearing a single piece of armature that drawn her dress from her spine and combed her hair to the top of her head. Fashion designers were out of control this year. To think you had to follow a dress code while the rentiers could wear those. 

"Are we… really obliged to go?" Eli asked uncomfortably, swaying on his two feet.

You agree with him, despite graduating from the Royal Imperial Academy as your comrades, your outer rim roots remind you that you are not part of this world of wealth and eccentricity, it is easy to get self conscious and discouraged. Thrawn on the other hand seems more bothered by the flashes of camera at the moment, protecting his eyes with his palm.

"Yes! Let's go!"

Without warning, you loop your arms between them and pull them inside with you, leaving behind the noisy crowd and paparazzis. You are quite surprised they didn’t try to escape your grasp. Thrawn stays by your side in silence, rubbing his eyes while Eli tightens his grip on your arm. It is far easier to navigate in a crowd as a block than alone against the current. After following the red carpet through several bridges and corridors, you finally arrive at the ballroom reserved for the Great Graduation Gala of the Royal Imperial Academy. As you pass the arches a thought enters your mind.

This is too much. 

If the outside of the Opera is elegantly simple, the inside is a mess… 

The Ballroom's domed roof makes use of all the available height provided. At least five levels circle around the main floor, each one designed according to the architectural fashion of the time. It is the most improbable room you have ever seen. Nowhere else in the galaxy could be found an auditorium bringing together a floor with vegetal designs and moldings, another with an obsession for symmetry and the purity of duracrete and one again with a contemporary interpretation of the Factory style with all variety of metals. Every floor is linked to the other thanks to a mural fountain in the shape of a geometrical labyrinth in deep black stones. And that’s not even taking into account the furniture, tapestries, and light fixtures.

The final product is… interesting. Yet again, given the clothing choice of the regulars of the place, it is expected. 

You lean on to Thrawn with a grin. 

"What can you deduce from this? I'm eager to hear your thoughts."

"An interesting display of various styles. But, beyond that, I have no ready opinion."

You laugh at his circonspect tone. 

"You have the right to find this ugly, nobody will hold it against you."

Eli, who was examining the room, nudges Thrawn.

“I think I just saw Captain Virgilio of the Blood Crow near the columns. We better introduce ourselves.”

“You’re quite right.”

You let them go to salute their superior, just as you spot a pyramid of glass that looks irresistible. You push your way through the talkative masse to the buffet, observing the large choice of dishes and drinks. You are really tempted by the champagne and the Calamnsi. It will relax you a little. There is nothing like an alcohol glass to feign confidence. 

You take a flute of Calamnsi, inhaling its scent. With its peach shades and tangerine fragrances, this drink possesses one of the highest alcohol concentrations despite having a soft taste. So soft, some children have mistaken it for some fruit juice and ended up completely drunk.

It's too strong for the beginning of this party, you decide to start with Champagne.

You're about to taste the golden spirit when a hand gently grabs your shoulder, almost making you drop your glass. You turn yourself only to see Eli with a finger on his mouth. 

"What are you doing here? I thought you were going to see the Captain with Thrawn." You ask with a low voice. 

“I just suggested we introduce ourselves. Besides, Thrawn is capable enough to do it without me supervising him."

You pick up the annoyance in his tone. 

"What's up between you too? You seem really upset by him."

"Nothing. What's in your glass?" 

"Champagne."

"Is there anything stronger?"

You find him a shot of Burning Gin and he thanks you with a nod before drinking the electric blue liquid in one sip. His face immediately twists into a grimace. 

"Maker," He gasps. "I can feel its burns all the way!"

"That’s the idea." You say with a smile.

You watch him as the alcohol slowly takes effect, relaxing his body little by little. He lets out a sigh of contentment.

"That feels much better." 

You put your arm around his shoulder, gently pressing him against you. 

"Eli, you can talk to me, you know?"

He puts his hand behind his neck. “It’s just this ball. It’s stressing me more than I thought it would.”

You sigh in resignation. He clearly doesn’t want to talk about it. You would have just preferred he didn’t openly lie to you. You stop insisting but keep your arm around him, offering him your presence. You both silently observe the ballroom and its inhabitants. All the chatter and clattering of glasses. How they slide across the floor in rhythm with the Orchestra. Some twirl with grace when some just hold their partners close to themself whispering sweet nothing to their ears, others watch like you and others talk business with smiles too bright to be completely honest.

You finish off your champagne and grab a glass of the Calamnsi. You make a silent toast with Eli, smiling, before turning back to the dancers. Unconsciously, you start to slowly rock together following the pace of the dancers and the instruments strings. You lay your head on Eli’s shoulder, enjoying the music vibrations through your body. He lays his head on yours and you stay this way, silently appreciating the moment with your friend.

"There you are.” 

A strict voice brings you back to a reality where Thrawn looks at you with a displead expression. Next to you, Eli let an exhausted sigh escape.

"May I ask why you sneak out before your superior?" Thrawn asks behind a closed face.

"I simply didn't feel like it, that's all." Eli tries to answer politely but his tone is acid.

Thrawn blinks. He starts to open his mouth before Eli quickly interrupts.

"(Y/n), do you hear this? It's our dance, let's go!" Eli exclaimed joyfully. 

He takes you by your wrist and you have just enough time to hand your full glass to Thrawn before getting dragged into the circle of dancers.

Leaving you no time to gather yourself Eli passes his hand on your back to your opposite hip and seizes your other hand before starting to twirl with the other couples. It takes you a second to stabilize yourself and properly follow his lead without mixing up your feet.

“Be more careful next time, I’ve almost tripped over someone!” You protest. “What’s with you so suddenly?”

He shoots you with his brightest smile. 

“I was listening to the music and felt the irrepressible urge to invite my great friend to dance, nothing special!”

And getting away from Thrawn as quickly as possible, you silently complete. You shake your head and go up to speed with him, flying across the floor as the other dancers. At the corner of your eye you take a glimpse of Thrawn putting your empty glass away and starting a conversation with a high ranked person. At least he doesn’t appear more annoyed than that. You shift back your attention to Eli, carefully avoiding stepping on his foot.

“You said earlier we should try to enjoy ourselves tonight, and this is exactly what I am doing right now,” he insists.

You don’t respond but agree, all those dance lessons pay off. Ballroom dances are mostly done for showing off but you are genuinely having fun in the arms of your friend, from whisk to sidesteps, you skillfully display your dance talents, laughing along with him. As the dance progresses you get looser with more amplified movements and funky steps. Your whole body starts to get warm with the exercise and you can feel a light veil of sweat on your forehead. Enthralled by the energy, you stay for the next few dances. The Orchestra dropt the ballroom repertoire for more popular songs. A non neglecting number of the students come on the floor, giving free reign to their dance moves. 

At the end of this segment you’re both out of breath and leave for a drink. While drinking you snap some photos with Eli as souvenirs, rapidly the smiles leave place to silly faces and you start scavenging the place to find other students and snap them together. Most of them are happy to oblige and give you their best smiles or their worst grimace and you join them in the picture. After that a significant amount of your class gathers for an unofficial photo and you go hands in hands with Eli. Someone thought it was a good idea to bring a champagne bottle that just exploded in their hands, soaking the group the moment the photo was taken. The final result is hilarious though.

You start feeling your wound and hear your stomach growl inelegantly. You also remember you’ve been drinking without eating a thing. You will collapse drunk if you don’t do something. You pour yourself a glass of water and turn yourself towards the canapes and petits fours with a ravenous smile. Eli imitates you and you start debating which variety of appetizers is the most tasty without minding the other distinguished guests around you. You're augmenting back to back, Eli’s more into the tomato and sesame canape and you prefer the sausage and groundberry one when an unknown voice is raised next to you.

“Excuse me, cadets.”

You raise an eyebrow, stopping mid-bite, looking toward the voice and see Thrawn with a new glass of Calamnsi in hand and an old man in a white uniform. The old man is looking at your surprised faces with an amused look, the corner of his mustache raised in a grin.

“Is it really how the new Empire’s officers should behave during an official party?”

Eli swallows his bite precipitately.

“Colonel Yularen?! I was not aware you would be here!”

Colonel Yularen, one of the ISB’s highest ranking officers? How do these two know this man? And more importantly why does he have to be here?!

They shake hands while you turn your back to swallow your bite and get rid of any crumbs you have on your face. You inspire deeply to give you strength and turn again with a broad smile, reaching your hand to him. He seizes it with a warm grasp.

“I don’t think we’ve met, Miss?” 

“Miss (y/l/n), Sir.”

He stares at you with your hand still in his. You feel your heart sink. You use your mother’s name for safety reasons but since Thrawn proved it was still possible to trace back your affiliation you start thinking no name was safe enough to cover your traces. Did he recognise you already?

“Miss (y/l/n)... Truly a charming name, it suits you very well.” He adds with a comforting smile.

You nod mumbling thanks, secretly searching for any signs of suspicion on his face, but he seems relaxed and cheerful. As much as an ISB officer in service may be cheerful, but you're still on your guard. 

As they start speaking between each other you try to calm down the heartbeat pounding in your head. Discussions and music become nothing more than white noise. You manage to concentrate on what is being said in front of you with some difficulty. You catch them speaking about the new assignments. Unfortunately it doesn’t take long for Thrawn and Eli to start a little argument once again. It’s then Yularen turns to you with a thin smile.

“You said you were not from Coruscant, is that so?”

“Yes,” you respond politely.

You didn’t say anything along those lines and you’re taken aback by his attempt at discussing your origins. Next to you Eli and Thrawn keep talking, unaware of your turmoil. He brings his glass to his lips without taking a sip pretending to search in his memory. You hold your breath.

“(y/l/n)... This name is not completely unknown to me… I am sure I have already heard it next to another one, but which one it might be?” He says, holding your gaze.

You’re convinced he’s lying. You gulp and clench your hand on your glass. His next words may upend your entire future. You suddenly feel terribly isolated in this overcrowded room and very alone. 

“Miss (y/l/n), does the system-”

“Colonel Yularen.”

Thrawn interjects suddenly with a firm but calm voice. You both turn your gaze to him wondering why he had intervened. Eli also looks surprised.

“I am truly sorry to interrupt your discussion, but I have promised a dance to my friend and I have already missed my chance several times tonight.” He explains courteously.

Both men stare at each other a second before Yularen shrugs his shoulders.

“If it is a promise, I can oblige it.”

“Thank you Colonel.” 

Thrawn finishes his glass, disposes of it and gently takes your hand to guide you among the dancers. 

“Thank you.” You whisper on the verge of tears. Your wound does not ease things either.

“Your physical language was quite distressed, I thought you might appreciate some assistance.”

“More than you know, I knew I might cross some ISB agent but not a colonel. I am sure he knows about my family…” You answer in a drawl, your eyes fixed behind him on Yularen to not miss any admission of suspicion. 

“Do you, now?” He asks, spinning you around.

You bite your lips to refrain from talking too much, you wanted to fully trust Thrawn but one could never be too cautious. You clench your hands against him in an effort to get a hold of yourself. You could cry a little to release some of the pressure but you're not in a good place nor good company to do it right now. He squeezes your hand and tightens his grip around your waist.

“Compose yourself. Do not let them see a weakness to use against you.”

What is rather irritating with Thrawn is his way of “consoling” people with cold hard facts, he appears to be incapable of managing friend's vulnerability and comforts them “by force”. You don’t answer anything and inhale deeply to calm you down, starting to pay attention to the dance.

Even though he didn’t mean it, he pulls you closer to him. You could almost put your head on his chest and you can once again feel his warmth spread from his body to yours. His scent reaches you and you note with pleasure he put on some cologne. You’re sure it’s Eli’s For some reason, the thought of Thrawn asking for perfume makes you chuckle and alleviates the atmosphere a bit. 

You follow the music, hesitations, outside spins, whisks… each movement comes together with ease but you feel him more tense than during rehearsals.

“Does your back still hurt?” You ask looking up at him.

“Indeed. It appears I have not recovered completely.”

Speaking of injuries, your foot makes it known it won't endure another dance for long. 

You close your eyes for a moment, concentrating yourself on the music. Following the accelerating tempo your feet flee after one another. The air grazes your skin as you twirl in each other's arms, and your dress feels like a soft veil that turns and follows your footwork like wings. You feel both weightless and grounded in his embrace. It's as if he's the only real thing tethering you to the world. 

Your head is spinning deliciously, wrapped in every sound and music mingling in a background shush with only one singular steady beat. Surprised, you open your eyes to find your head resting on his chest, against his heart. Shocked but pleased, you let your head rest, careful not to make any movement that could prompt him to reject you. You feel a grin coming up on your lips.

“Thrawn?” Your words are whispered like a secret. “ Are we ever gonna discuss what happened?” You ask , raising your head to meet his gaze.

He regards you with blazing eyes in silence. You continue dancing eye to eye, Thrawn leading the both of you. You could swear he slowly goes off beat as time goes on, but… nevermind. 

“(y/n)...”

You see his eyes jumping from your eyes to your lips repeatedly as he slowly leans toward you.

“Yes?” You hold your breath with expectations.

“You have crumbs on your face.” He says in all seriousness.

“Oh crap!” 

You try rubbing your face against your shoulder the most discreetly possible, feeling a bit stupid now. 

Thrawn is back in his usual upright posture like nothing happened. It would seem nothing could disturb the man. However, his missteps say otherwise. Maybe you did have some effect on him.

You're ready to throw a clever remark when you feel his hand in yours trembling a bit. Looking up at him you note he breathes shortly and gulps with difficulty.

“Thrawn? Is everything okay?” Your voice’s shaky, you’ve never seen him this way.

He leans on once again, his forehead almost against yours, his eyes closed. He's definitely hotter than usual. You turn your head to scan the room in research of a balcony or a window, fortunately there are enough dancers around you to hide you from the public eye. You hear the music approaching its end, you will soon be able to get him some fresh air. 

His head slides against your skin and you turn back your attention to him, suddenly keenly aware of how close you really are. You can feel his breath on your mouth and it’s getting closer, you're stunned by this and wait without moving, with butterflies in your stomach and blood rushing to your cheeks. 

Is it happening? Are you dreaming?

You wait expectantly, your mouth is slightly agape and ready to embrace his. You hold your breath as your lips are nearly about to touch. 

But at the decisive moment his face slide from your forehead to the side, laying his 

head on your shoulder and the music ends. You catch your breath unknowing if you must be relieved or hurt. Your hands leave their place to grab his arms, trying to raise him, you can feel his high temperature on your skin. The couples are slowly leaving the dancefloor and you will soon be the last one.

“(y/n), please… Escort me outside…” He says breathlessly.

You pass your arm under his and he raises back up. His sight is straight and his step is solid like always. You both cross the room without difficulty between guests, people tend to move off of his way and tonight is no exception, especially under his burning gaze. Nobody would suspect a thing with his adamant behavior but his trembling fingers didn't lie to you.

You pass the arches of the room and immediately turn into a less busy corridor, away from the scrutiny of the other guests you feel his body weighing more and more into your arms so much you’re convinced he’s gonna fall on you at any moment.

“Come on.” you try to cheer him up. “We’re gonna find you an open window.”

“Yes, I…”

He doesn't finish his sentence, he takes support on a nearby wall and takes his head into his head like he is floored by an atrocious headache. You look at him in dreadful powerlessness, and run back full speed to the ballroom, looking for the only person that comes to your mind in such a situation. 

“Eli! Help!”

@bluechiss, @al-astakbar

#thrawn x reader #thrawn x f!reader #thrawn x you #thrawn x y/n #thrawn #grand admiral thrawn #mitth'raw'nuruodo #fanfic #vibratingskull

[thecoffeelorian]

Study Buddies, Part 1 of 3

Pairing: Thrawn x GN!Reader; Thrawn x Autistic Reader

Brief Synopsis: Arriving late to a study session, you fear that Thrawn might end up reporting you to your superiors. However, after realizing you've just been bullied by another student, things take a slightly unexpected turn...

Tagging: @al-astakbar @mysticalgalaxysalad @mitth-eli-vanto @freshmoneyalmondathlete @jesslove23 @telltale-vixen @razzel-my-dazzel22 @oceania15-blog1 @blackddarling @whydoilovehim @dipsylou @jedinerd27 and any other Thrawnies not looking for smut!

“You’re late.” Your fellow Ensign, Thrawn—also known on occasion as Mitth’raw’nuru’odo—seems to have no clear emotion in his voice as you slip into the room. He may very well be a bit annoyed at you, no thanks to you arriving a good thirty minutes after your intended time, and without a single comm in advance, no less. Quite unlike your usual self, unfortunately, no thanks to the unwelcome surprise you had to deal with on your way over. Another unwelcome surprise, at least for today, is this: because of the new rulebook that now runs this…establishment a bit more than the actual top brass does, it’s looking rather likely that this is about to become a major infraction upon your permanent record, if not also a deciding factor against you where all of your future promotions might be concerned. Especially if Thrawn takes it upon himself to rat you out, according to your own local slang. In any case, you’re going to feel just as disappointed as he must be as he’s about to look back at you, if not also somewhat brought down about the possibility of a destroyed relationship. Even if he doesn’t take the moment available to express this—or, for that matter, whether or not he bothers to alert those back home about your ‘adventures’—you would still feel the sting of separation regardless, as he always managed to have this effect on you no matter what. At least, that’s the general thought in your head before he turns his blood-red eyes upon you, and not three seconds later, narrows them in what you can only hope is a look of concern. “And for good reason, I see…the other cadets are acting out again.” As if to shield yourself a second time, your left hand moves instinctively to the bruise beneath your right eye, the most recent ‘lesson’ that Cadet Karvo, a somewhat richer student, decided to teach you on the ways of the Empire. He hasn’t exactly appreciated that a newcomer from the Outer Rim could so much as get admitted to this elite academy, let alone get two commendations by their instructors in almost as many months…so, naturally, he saw fit to remind you of your place somewhere below his own. Somewhere between an assistant and a servant, maybe, though judging by the words he used, he would have loved to see you brought a lot lower. But you, though…perhaps you’re beginning to wonder if your place was always meant to be at this Chiss’ side all along. “That’s the second time this month, isn’t it, Ensign?” This feeling grows just a little as he leaves the safety of his desk to stand before you, the distance between the two of you now curiously shortened. You had originally planned to come here for the first of many study sessions, not just for recalling the general knowledge needed to enter the Imperial Navy, but also to help Thrawn himself practice his Basic. Now that he’s meeting you on your level in three short strides or less, however…preparing for exams now seems to be the least of your worries. “You’re feeling vulnerable and afraid…among other things, to be sure. I can tell from the fluctuations in your pulse and oxygen intake.” There goes his Chiss way of knowing what you yourself don’t always want to acknowledge, possibly even to the point of seeing right through all of your behavioral defenses. How strange that he could always manage to get under your skin, though without wishing to for a great deal of the time you had together. “Yes…er, I mean…” In fact, if you weren’t slowly descending into a state of incoherence, you might just go so far into believing that you found something just a little bit, well…intimidating about this Thrawn. He was well ahead of you in height by at least twelve inches, better gifted in strength and speed, and—in the slang of your hometown—had a mind like a durasteel trap. Hell, by rights, he should have pummeled you at least once in Basic Combat 101, and stolen a few hearts in the process without half trying! “…I don’t know when—or if—they’re gonna be back. Do…do you think they might try again?"

#star wars #star wars fanfiction #starwarsfanfiction #thrawn x reader #thrawn x gn! reader #thrawn x autistic reader #mitth'raw'nuruodo #thrawn #18+ only #actually autistic

[ciaossu-imagines]

Okay, but tell me that Blush Blush isn’t just one humungous polyship? It totally is and it’s hinted at strongly through text even in game! So I didn’t even have to pick one particular polyship here and just based it off the entire cast of lovely, sexy men! I hope you enjoy the headcanons, based off this prompt here!

Who shops for groceries?

I feel like Nimh definitely always remembers to shop for groceries and that grocery shopping dates are a huge thing for him. They’re just very relaxed and cutely domestic and really up his alley. Myx, maybe not so surprisingly, is really into farmer’s markets and, while some dates he takes you on are raucous or crazy, he appreciates a good Saturday morning date with you to the farmer’s market.

Who kills the spiders?

William does not abide spiders being killed. He traps them with a glass and takes them outside and even gives them a name as he says goodbye to them. Anon makes you kill the spiders for him, while Volks will happily kill the spiders for you.

Who comes home drunk at 3 a.m.?

Eli, Dmitri, and William have all done this in the time you’ve known them. Eli loves clubbing and the nightlife and it’s too easy to get drunk off those frou-frou, fruity drinks he loves because it’s so hard to taste the alcohol in them. He’ll happily stagger home, drunk and giggling, with you after a night out on the town. William is a wine drunk and gets silly when drunk and it’s up to you to get him safely back home and into bed to keep him from getting into much trouble. Dmitri doesn’t get drunk quickly but when he gets drunk, he gets horny and it will be a race for him to either get home to you or to take you home…or anywhere private, really.

Who makes breakfast?

Kelby makes protein shakes every morning and always makes one for you if he’s with you. Nimh cooks you a healthy breakfast every morning you’re with him. Eli loves brunch with you and will take you out to brunch fairly often, where there will be mimosas and gossiping. Garret makes the most heavenly flapjacks but doesn’t often eat breakfast – they’re normally a breakfast for supper kind of deal.

Who remembers to feed the fish?

William never forgets to feed any animal. If you have fish, Sven really likes feeding them too…and sometimes, you’ll find that the fish have been fed, though you can’t remember feeding them, and it’s usually because it’s one of those little things that Cole breaks in to your house to do does for you as sweet gestures to make your life easier.

Who decorates the apartment?

William, Dmitri, Volks, and Stirling all have very set senses of style when it comes to interior design and their apartments are all quite decorated. Nimh’s is kind of a cozy mishmash that he encourages you to add to. Eli loves shopping for furniture and interior décor as dates but would want to design the apartment with you instead of by himself. Scale, Ichiban, and Garret aren’t really into interior design strongly and are happy to turn the reins over to you when it comes to decorating. And as long as it’s really damn clean, Anon doesn’t much care what the place looks like…just, clean it. Please.

Who initiates duets?

Come on, the answer to this one is so obviously Myx that you had to see the answer coming. He breaks out in random song and loves it when you harmonize with him.

Who falls asleep first?

Okay, so I feel like Nimh, Kelby, and Scale fall asleep before you. Stirling stays up most of the night since he doesn’t need a lot of sleep but he does like watching you sleep. Myx and Eli want you out with them until late, enjoying the nightlife, and fall asleep about the same time as you. Ichiban has a habit of staying up late playing video games and it’s not too rare for him to come to bed after you’ve fallen asleep. William is hit or miss – sometimes he likes waiting for you to fall asleep, just enjoying the peacefulness of the moment with you and thinking how cute you look while sleeping while other times he passes out first.

#blush blush #headcanons #polyship #nimh blush blush #myx blush blush #eli blush blush #kelby blush blush #scale blush blush #william blush blush #stirling blush blush #volks blush blush #garret blush blush #anon blush blush #ichiban blush blush #sven blush blush #cole blush blush

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

James Acaster stood in for John Robins, alongside Elis James, for a couple of radio episodes in February 2018, while John off touring The Darkness of Robins, and of course James was very good. There were lots of funny bits, everyone should go listen to the episodes of you want to hear James Acaster actually be funny, it's episodes 208 and 209 of the Radio X years. However, I had three things I wanted to comment on that have nothing to do with the actual jokes.

1) They discussed whether James Acaster is ginger, which I appreciate, because that has always confused me. Or at least, it's confused me since I first got on Tumblr, which was not long after I first saw Taskmaster, and saw the blond boy from season 7 referred to as a ginger. I've never brought it up because I just thought I guess i'm not very good at identifying hair colours, but I always found it strange. Which is why I pleased that, during this radio episode, they mentioned the idea of James Acaster being ginger, and James said that people call him ginger sometimes, but he's always thought he was blond. I am pleased that, at least, I am not the only one who's found this confusing.

But then, I watched the first nine seasons of Taskmaster before going on Tumblr and thought of Alex Horne as having brown hair, and then I saw people call him ginger on here, and I went back and looked at pictures of him, and yes, he's definitely ginger, I just didn't notice. I think I sometimes just don't notice when people are ginger. But I've looked at James Acaster again and I still don't think he is. Also, I'm now remembering that in early episodes of The Last Leg they used to call Josh Widdicombe ginger, and he's less ginger and more purely blond than anyone mentioned in this post so far, including Elis James.

I mean, I do see the colour red. The first time I watched Mock the Week I got that Frankie Boyle has red hair. But I do not understand how people look at James Acaster and see ginger. Glad that's been addressed and he's on my side.

2) Elis James and James Acaster dedicated some of the episode to making fun of John Robins for being on a tour with his highly emotional stand-up hour, featuring what Elis enjoys calling "the cynical inclusion of emotional heft" (citing an Edinburgh review that praised the "emotional heft", but the word cynical was added by Elis). This is fair enough, I happen to like a good stand-up hour with some emotional heft, I think something can be curated for the speaker's personal benefit while also being grounded in genuine emotional weight and I think The Darkness of Robins is one of many examples of that, but also, I'm aware that there's something inherently cynical in turning emotional heft into a project for monetary profit and awards. No problem with Elis making jokes about that. I've heard Elis James' stand-up routines, it is definitely internally consistent for him to make fun of other people for doing comedy with meaningful emotional subject matter. Absolutely nothing in Elis' catalogue makes him a hypocrite for mocking that. However, it was pretty amusing to listen to James Acaster make fun of something for doing that. Especially as this was just a couple of months before James started performing the earliest WIPs of Cold Lasagne, a show at least partly inspired by a breakup he had, I think, the same week as John Robins' breakup that formed the basis of Darkness of Robins. James Acaster may have just been annoyed that someone else got there first and won a Perrier Award for it, before he thought to do a show about that.

3) In honour of James Acaster back on Radio X, they did one more Classic Scrape.

After I heard this bit, I looked up when Comedy Unleashed started, it was, in fact, February 2018. So I'm pleased about this. According to Nish Kumar recently, James Acaster thinks it's going a bit far to yell at Jimmy Carr at a comedy festival just for appearing on Jordan Peterson's podcast. And maybe James is right, even though Nish has my eternal respect for being a person who didn't listen to reason on that. So I enjoy hearing a story in which James Acaster is the one picking a fight over people doing shitty things. Some people are all right.

[suvidrache]

NSFW Alphabet - Uryu

age in bio when interacting. minors do not interact.

Word Count: 507 / Read it on AO3 | Offline Version

A: Aftercare - What they're like after sex?

He's going to do what he can to help you out. Carry you to the bath, change the sheets, etc.

B: Body Part - Their favorite part of themselves/you?

His hands and your ass/breasts.

C: Cum - Taste, texture, etc?

A clear color, slightly salty, and sticky.

D: Dirty Secret

He has an album of the images you sent to him.

E: Experience - How much experience do they have?

None, he's never been in this position before.

F: Favorite Position

Lotus, missionary, any that allows him to see your face better. Occasionally doggy.

G: Goofy - How are they: serious, funny, etc?

Not entirely funny, but will try to relax the tension as much as he can.

H: Hair - Shaved, not shaved, color?

Trims every once in a while, black.

I: Intimacy - How are they romantically?

Very romantic. He's going to lay out petals and try to make each time different from the last.

J: Jack Off - How often do they masturbate?

Every once in a while. Maybe even more, he doesn't want to admit such things and is embarrassed he even does things like that.

K: Kink - Their kinks?

Breeding, watching you in the mirror, tying each other up.

L: Location - Favorite place(s) to do it?

The bedroom, nowhere else.

M: Motivation - What gets them into it?

Lingerie, tight-fitting clothes, and short clothes (crop tops, short skirts/shorts, etc.) Flirting/being suggestive.

N: No - Will not do/turns them off?

Anything that will cause pain, bleeding, or death. Threesomes.

O: Oral - Giving, receiving, skill?

Loves to receive, but prefers giving just because he doesn't want to seem needy. Over time, he'll be more confident and willing to voice how he feels.

P: Pace - Fast, rough, slow, etc?

Slow and hard, he'll go harder at times.

Q: Quickie - How often?

Every once in a while. Very rarely unless you initiate it. Again, when he finds more confidence, he'll voice his opinions.

R: Risk - Willing to take risks/experiment?

Highly unlikely.

S: Stamina - How long/many rounds can they go?

3 or 4 for about 45 minutes.

T: Toys - Do they have any/will they use them?

No, but he would be willing to use them to satisfy you. He would be blushing if you used them on him.

U: Unfair - How much do they tease?

Not much, because he knows that if you teased him enough, you would leave him a blushing and stuttering mess.

V: Volume - How loud are they?

Pretty vocal, but not too loud.

W: Wild Card - Something random?

He'd love to spy on you, but it would leave him with nosebleeds, so unfortunately, he just looks at the photos you sent him in a locked room.

X: X-Ray - Size, appearance, etc?

7, pale with some noticeable veins, a big vein on the underside, cut.

Y: Yearning - How high is their sex drive?

High, but he doesn't speak about it until he's confident. 

Z: ZZZ - How quickly do they fall asleep?

He falls asleep once you do.

© SUVIDRACHE — do not copy, translate, modify, or plagiarize my work. reblogs are appreciated!

Tag List: @thevoidwriting, @eli-chris, @stygianoir / Join My Tag List Here!

#uryu x y/n #uryuu #bleach uryu #uryu x reader #uryu ishida #ishida uryū #ishida uryuu #bleach x y/n #bleach x you #bleach imagines #bleach x reader #bleach headcanons #bleach smut

[jerzwriter]

What is the love language of your characters?

Hey there!

So, in the past, I did the test for my Open Heart MCs and LIs to get answers, but of course, I can't find them. lol So I redid them, and I did it for Carolina and Trystan in CoP, too. I did not do it for Eli and Zoe because their WTD world is so different it wouldn't completely fit. This is how it turned out:

Casey & Tobias / Open Heart:

While most would be shocked that physical touch is #3 for them, I'm not. This makes sense for them.

Words of Affirmation fit them completely. First, communication is the cornerstone of their relationship. It's why they work so well. They constantly reassure each other through spoken words, texts, etc., not because they feel they need to or out of insecurity, but because they are honestly that crazy about each other. It's all heartfelt, cherished, and, if I'm being honest, it's all a bit of constant, ongoing foreplay. lol

Quality Time makes sense because they love nothing more than being together.

Physical Touch. Anyone who knows this couple knows this is very, very important to them. But it works in conjunction with the first two, and, let's be honest, 23%, 26%, and 29%... they're all pretty close.

Ethan & Kaycee / Open Heart:

I think this is appropriate for them. They're both very busy professionals who border on being workaholics, so showing love through Acts of Service is very important to them. Taking something off of their plate so they can get a little extra rest, or tend to a project they've been neglecting is a huge way of showing love to them.

Words of Affirmation also fit. Initially, Ethan is more insecure than Kaycee, and let's face it, hearing affirmations helped. As time goes on, that lessens, but they both love hearing loving, reassuring words about each other.

Quality time is huge for them because it's limited.

Trystan x Carolina / Crimes of Passion:

This one surprised me a little, but just a little... They're a flirtatious couple, so I expected Words of Affirmation and Physical Touch to be higher, but this does make sense.

Think of all they've been through, individually and collectively. They know what matters most, and that is time with each other. They know it's fleeting. They know it can be stolen at any time. They want as much of it as possible and will not take it for granted.

Acts of Service also makes sense because of their jobs/lifestyle. Doing things out of love to lessen the other's load, when their own is so heavy, says I love you louder than words ever could, and it is so appreciated.

Words of Affirmation and Physical Touch are tied for 3rd, and both are very important to them. The fact that they are tied really fits. Think of how flirtatious Tyrstan is: words. But for both of them, especially Carolina, it's very important to have both of these things in tandem.

If anyone is interested in taking this quiz for their character/pairing, or even themselves, here's the link: Love Languages Quiz

Thank you for the ask! And I'm working on the other ask you sent. I'm familiar, but it's been a long time, so I want to take more time to answer. :)

(Oh, note gifts mean next to nothing for my pairings... that fits! lol)

#open heart #tobias carrick #tobias x casey #ethan ramsey #ethan x kaycee #crimes of passion #trystan thorne #trystan x carolina #asks answered #love languages

[kalims]

rating my moots,

cause why not?!

note that I didn't add everyone since I felt too shy to tag em aksbsnna

1. @kalimsstan

9/10 because I've never had a fan account before, the interview was very fun and I cackled when I saw the AMOUNT OF TAGS USED WHEN I CHANGED MY THEME AJSBSJ

2. @ravenlking

9/10!! guys meet my editor in quotev. raven is very patient and fun to talk to ☺ its always a great time where we manage to strike a conversation together

3. @not-idia-shroud

10/10. ah yes, rain. remember when we literally never chat at the same time in discord? BYE I BE WAITING FOR A RESPONSE AND WHEN I GET IT ITS THE NEXT DAY

4. @v-anrouge

8/10. because we actually haven't interacted much and we mooted when I saw that they follow me and I followed them in turn cause they seem like a cool person!

5. @twistedlotus

7/10. IDK WHEN THIS HAPPENED HLP UMMM... HI ELARIA U HAVE A NICE NAME??? 😭

6. @a-hollow-angel

10/10. I swear they work a full time job liking all my posts 😩 like I fr post once then I get a notification immediately.. it doesn't matter when it happens,, THEY JUST DO JT

7. @merotwst

11/10!! ellie da best and I've known her for like.. LESS THAN A MONTH?? A MONTH?? MORE THAN A MONTH?!?!? idk man basta. she had big lady balls if steel (which she said somewhere in discord I just don't remember the specifics)

8. @myujis

10/10. vivi i miss u 🥺😭.. anyways yh I actually got confused on who myuji was then I saw it was vivi and went: OHH

9. @akiville3

12/10 MISOOOOOOO HIIIIIIII <333333 NEED I SAY MORE?!

10. @hytyyto

8/10. HEYOOO I barely do talk with yall and am sorry but I'm very busy.. 😭 PLS TALK TO ME IF UCAN I WILL TALK WIT U <3

11. @yuistan

8/10. not as close as well but I will spoonfeed my moots a handful of chicken soup you know.. unless other soup if you don't like chicken 😚

12. @spadecentral

9/10. very nice, sends me sweet stuff 🥺 ngl highkey keeps confusing myself who ellie and eli is.. 😭

13. @malleusball

10/10 one of my longest moots ever! we go WAYYY BACK even in the most atrocious times I don't want to remember <3

14. @kerosenesin

10/10. I THINK U IS DUST?? LEONALOVER69???pls I double checked if i mistook u as someone else again.. SAY LEONA IF UR THEM

15. @chenyann

10/10. yako i started panicking when I didn't see ur user on my following page but turns out I was just being blind. anywaysss ily

16. @twstwonderlandstuff

8/10. AYEEE ANOTHER FELLOW WRITER! on a side note, when a blog I like follows me you know I'm following back ASAP, destroying the screen type shit

17. @zgvlt

13/10. IDK WHY BUT NATHYA IS JUST 13 POINTS. I love her works sm as well as the graphic designs of her posts!! it's so aesthetically pleasing to me eyes I'm cryin (the one follow I could NOT GET OVER FOR DAYS)

18. @riddlesimp

8/10. ANGELLLL HALLOOO we haven't talked much despite us being moots for a long time ong 😭😭 angel is very sweet and apparently my daughter in law

19. @zeina-is-bored

2/10 (/J) MINUS SIX BECAUSE YOU DIDNT INVITE ME TO THR WEDDING. ☹☹☹😞😞😞😞😭😭😭😭😭😭

20. @rggie

11/10. if there's someone other than nathya with amazing graphics it's definitely mal. I can see the effort put into her theme!! gods I swear all of her blog is all connected to one theme and I love it!! IS U OK THO BABES??

21. @arent-i-the-fairest

8/10. cutieee!! love the works, I love me a bunch of neige works I can binge read <3 every1 should appreciate the rsa writers I swear

22. @achy-boo

1/10 (/j) I swear the friendship we have is so chaotic, WEVE INSULTED EACH OTHER MQNY TIMES AND CALLED EACH OTHER BITCHES QKSHKAKQ

23. @dicetheroll

8/10. see you soon dice! good luck on your finals.. when i first followed dice i immediately ran straight to the OM!works once I saw they wrote. It was AMAZING

24. @scara-lovebot

9/10. you are the one that shaped our minion coochie gc theme <3 my most prominent memory of you was the minion tampons era

25. @jabberwockk

8/10. chris :o was the one that answered me patiently when my dumbass didn't go to google for a fat answer when I asked for the birthdays of the characters.. we had a crisis about being broke together

26. @soldmygenderforglitter

9/10. I MISS U BAEEEEEE.. ilysm for talking to me in dms in tumblr for nearly everyday! I'm so sorry bout the late replies sometimes t-t I hope ur doing well babes

27. @celiapoststuff

10/10. MY CHILDSDDDDDDDDDD who adopted ME instead of the other way around lololol. love ya celia and your like for xiao and kalpas

28. @dr3amscap3

3/10 omg we haven't talked so long bt I GIVE U A 3 (JOKINGLY) BECAUSE U STARTED THE RICKROLL ROSA CHAIN AND NOW I CANT GET AWAY FROM RICK ASTLEY AND THE RICKROLLS 😭😭😭

29. @ravynous

1921739/10. THE BEST PERSON I SWEAR. RAVY ILYSMMMN <333 ur always there for me and so supportive.. how are you doing bae 😭💞 I hope ur kicking finals ass instead of the other way around

30. @raix-lv

1038171/10 REMEMBER WHEN WE MET THROUGH THE NEIGR ARTICLE JEEZ THAT WAS SO CHAOTIC. anyways, I can definitely say rai is one of my closest moots. GIRL WHERE HAVE U BEEN

31. @hxnarii

192911/10 we became moots after my vent post I think?? I thought u were really nice & kind so I followed u. GODS I DONT EVER REGRET MEETING UR RANDOM BRAIN (also ty for the pjsekai acc yknow yknow <3)

32. @nanamisflowerfield

11/10. OK LISTEN WE BARELT TALKED. the last thing I remember is the manhwa reccs but nanami is so sweet I swear YOU CAN SEE IT ON HER BLOG ITSELF SHES SO NICE

33. @honey-milk-depresso

192719/10 MY FIRST EVER MOOT AND YES I REMEMBER. I've seen honey around when I was writing for genshin her comments were so sweet! even though she keeps denying her love for the three men I still love her <3 mwa

34. @cynthinesia

9/10. I had to edit to add u SRYYYY UHMMM WERE U THE CATER PISS BOTTLE SOMETHING PERSON

35. @cupids-chamber

-12028/10 JOKES ON YOU IT ISNT BEST FOR LAST 👿 you never forget to remind me of the rickrolls (aka bane of my existence) THR AMOUNT OF CHAOS IN UR SERVER I SWEAR. DONT THIK I FORGOT THE TIME WHERE I JOINED ONE OF UR SERVERS AND IMMEDIATELY GOT RICKROLLED NOT EVEN 5 SECS IN

THERES MORE BUT NABSKA

gods did I have that much moots

#★ — rating my moots #★ — chats

[dandylion240]

All the edgy asks for Eli please :D

1: What does your OC feel is important to be talented at?

For Eli it's important to be musically talented. He's been playing guitar since he received his first guitar as a toddler. He's been writing his own music since he was little kid. He can play the piano as well as the guitar but he prefers the guitar. He can his guitar with him on long walks in the woods and write music with nature.

2: Does your OC adapt easily to changes in life or do they have a hard time getting accustomed?

He's fairly adaptable. He takes change as a natural part of life. The only time change is difficult for him is when he percieves this change as a way to control him. Then he tends to stick his toes in and shows his stubborn side.

3: Does your OC struggle with any type of addictions?

No. He generally doesn't party or go out to bars. It's just not his scene despite his friends best efforts to get him to go out with them after performing and touring. On the rare occasions he does go out with them he tends to drink non-alcoholic drinks. He finds it frustrating that in his band persona he's depicted as being a hardcore parteir and always rumored to being in rehab whenever they take a break from touring. All rumors perpetuated by his managers seeking to give him a bad boy rep.

4: How does your OC behave typically under severe stress?

He tends to go with the flow to keep harmony with the band and his managers but when he hits his limit he lets his frustration out in passive aggressive ways.

5: What calms your OC down the best under severe stress?

Being left alone or having someone to talk his feelings out. Most of the time it's turning to his parents or his sister, Jolene. But later on it'll be Awan who has always been to calm him when no one else could.

More under the cut

6: Does your OC have an unrealistic view of some area of their life or worldview?

He dislikes confrontation and when he's being pushed into things he has a tendancy to become self critical and believing he's not enough and what he wants doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things.

7: What does your OC hate and like about themselves?

He dislikes the fact he doesn't stand up for himself but at the same time he likes being the one to keep the peace.

8: What does your OC hate and appreciate on others?

He dislikes the demands others put upon his time, his life and making decisions for him that he doesn't agree with. He appreciates being able to do what he loves but he doesn't like that he has no say in it.

9: What maladaptive behavioral models in your OC’s personality do they have to struggle with the most?

He struggles with avoidance tendancies and when he can't avoid the person or situation then he becomes passive aggressive.

10: What type of people does your OC idolize the most?

His dad, Jonah and Cecil. His sister Jolene because she doesn't take crap from anyone.

11: What makes your OC feel most guilt in their life?

The answer to this is kind of spoilery. So I'm going to try to keep this as nonspecifc as possible. He regrets what he said and did the last time he saw Awan. He blames himself for Awan leaving. That he finally got up enough courage to express how he felt and he never saw Awan again for several years later.

12: Is your OC mature or immature for their age?

He's very mature. He's always felt he had to watch out for his family. He mediated between his parents and Jolene; especially when they were teenagers and she wanted more freedom. He kept her from doing what he thought would be a terrible mistake and moving in with their dad, Ethan when she felt the rules that Cecil and Jonah set for her were too restrictive and unreasonable.

13: How independent is your OC for their age and life situation?

He's always wanted to be a musician. He formed his band when he was a kid and they got their first gig at sixteen and a music contract at 18. He's been fairly independent ever since; although he will call Jonah/Cecil for advice before making important decisions.

14: Where and what from does your OC seek most typically comfort from?

Until he meets Awan again he seeks comfort from being alone in nature.

15: Is your OC afraid of confrontation or do they seek to lay things down on open?

He avoids confrontations as much as he possibly can. He likes to please people and he struggles with setting limits so people tend to take advantage of him.

16: How openly does your OC show their emotions?

He's easy going, calm and amiable. What he doesn't show easily is anger. He tends to repress that until it's like a volcano erupting.

17: What does your OC do when they’re dealing with intense emotional pain?

He goes out for a walk or plays music so that he can think and recharge.

18: What aspect of your OC’s personality or essence do other people usually have a problem with?

People get so used to him accepting things and not making waves that they are shocked when he's hit his limit.

19: Is there anything others often admire about your OC?

His musical ability

20: Do other people have misconceptions about some parts of your OC’s personality?

They have the misconception that nothing bothers him. That even if they don't ask him his opinion or take something without asking that he'll just be ok with it.

21: How much of an attention seeker is your OC?

He's very social but he wouldn't say he seeks attention. He'd much rather just perform and disappear into the background once its over.

22: Does your OC believe in something supernatural or not scientifically proven?

Yes he does.

23: Does your OC have a criminal record?

No he doesn't. Althought he has a secret that might give someone else one.

24: Does your OC have any sexual deviances or kinks?

Unlike what his managers say he does not and he doesn't like the image they have created of him either. It would surprise his fans that he hasn't had sex yet and feels very little interest in it (that will change once he's reunited with someone who has had his heart forever)

25: How does your OC see their own value in comparison to other people?

He knows his own self worth he just doesn't see that it's worth asserting himself if it means making waves.

26: Does your OC live in self-denial about anything?

Yes. Once he and Awan meet again he will deny having any feelings for him.

27: What does your OC think about the concept of love?

He thinks it's a wonderful dream but not one for him. (We'll see if someone can change his mind)

28: Is your OC loyal or more prone of take advantage of people close to them?

Definitely loyal

29: Is your OC wild/ reckless or do they tend to stay on the safe side inside their comfort zone?

He has his comfort zone and his forrays out of it. He's not one to be reckless despite his public image of being a bad boy.

30: What could make your OC cry?

Finding out how wrong he was for why Awan left.

#eli reagan #ts4 #character development

[missameliep]

Choices Fandom: Countdown to 2023

@choicesfandomappreciation: thanks for once again hosting such a lovely event ❤

I'm waaaay behind my reading list and haven't gotten a chance to read as many fanfics as I wished this year, however I had the privilege to get to know some other creatives in the fandom and some true gems found my way. And since this fandom is blessed with so many talented and creative people I first want to say a huge THANK YOU to all of you who keep writing and sharing your tales and talents with the rest of us, delivering heartwarming stories about our favorite characters and just keeping this small fandom alive, despite the notes, irl issues etc.

The lists below are not extensive, there's a lot of writers and fandoms inside our fandom that I'm unfamiliar with, so I just listed some of my personal favorites and a few stories I really enjoyed this year in appreciation of the writers who create lovely works who brightens our days and make us laugh and sometimes cry, and inspire me to keep going and get better.

I'll be listing 3 writers and 3 stories, and a few bonuses because as I said, too many talents and too many good stories! ❤️

Three Writers: @lorirwritesfanfic @lilyoffandoms and @lizzybeth1986 - those incredibly talented writers (and generous and kind people) are gems in this fandom and have written some of my favorite stories this year (and in the past ones too), and their beautiful writing is definitely an inspiration to me.

Bonus mentions: @aallotarenunelma @julia-highstorms @storyofmychoices @jerzwriter

Three Stories:

What Comes Next by @lorirwritesfanfic - the series Meant To Be is one of my favorite fics ever, the characters are nuanced and given traits that made them all the more realistic and relatable, there's a lot of research going on and the dialogues are so powerful. The series and my talented friend Lori are an inspiration to me; every chapter is amazingly good, but this one was my favorite this year. It's well-written, the pacing is awesome and the plot is soooo satisfying with all the drama and wedding conversation! Sign me up!

Chapter IX - Racing Hearts by @princess-geek - Unspoken Desires by this amazingly talented writer is also one of my favorite series in the fandom, and this chapter absolutely has it all: drama drama drama, humor, great dialogues, you name it! A must read!

Eleanor's Kitchen by @lizzybeth1986 - how not to love this series? The writing is exceptionally beautiful, the themes and subjects, even the most sensitive, are dealt with so much care and the way Eleanor is portrayed with such nuance and the conflicts between the different roles she plays are amazingly delivered.

Bonus mentions:

The Queen of Wolves by @noesapphic - it's no secret I consider Noe a talented writer and love her Cursed Heiress universe, and this fic is such an interesting insight into the life of the OC Mariana Howard, "who grabbed pain by the hand and made it her weapon to thrive in society and turn it into power". This is just one of the powerful lines she delivered in this one.

A Mother's Journal by @jerzwriter - I'm in awe with her WtD fanfics and how she's addressing the sensitive issues and impossible choices Eli's family dealt with when the outbreak happened. And seeing this through his mother's POV is such a great narrative choice. This one is my absolutely favorite of her fics so far.

Gut Feeling by @lorirwritesfanfic - yes, I'm listing two MtB chapters. But how could I not mention this one?! It's written like an amazing episode of a great drama series with hints of thriller, and Lori's usual care for research and keeping the characters in character. With all the fun dialogues, the OCs, the drama!!! Showstopping!!! Totally recommend it!

I want to thank all of you amazing people for sharing your talents with the fandom 💖💖💖

#choices