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scarletevening · 7 months

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stitches leave scars [ keegan p. russ ]

someone reqd this n i accidentally deleted the post and im literally so upset over it it's not even funny

this is long asf btw i loved that req so much omfg

cw: near death experience/mentions of death, violence [not in detail, sorta game typical], severe injury, foul language, angst & comfort, mutual pining, gn!reader

"Two o'clock, hold it!" A gruff voice rang through the crackle of your radio. You wanted to growl back in a fuss, but he wasn't wrong. You wanted him to be, to impress him. Lunging, knowing you shouldn't, just a smidge of a moment too early, you attempt an assault on your enemy.

Keyword; Attempt.

Quickly struck down, your body flung to the floor, feeble attempts at escaping the violent blast of your enemies gun. The same gruff voice rang in your ears, your mind aching as it faltered, struggling to evade the darkness that was at your heels. Familiar crackle, and static of the radio drowned out, your open wounds numbing slowly from their agonizing burn, tripping over your feet as you fell into black.

He was right.

Keegans heart stopped. His mouth opened, the squeak of mind-shattering tension the only thing sounding, air escapes his lungs. Instincts went lame, trying to do anything but make his fingers twitch, to jump to you, to block the person who shot you, to take the damn bullet for you. The air was suddenly loud, the silence deafening. The radio static became meaningless, just as it may have been for you, he thought, eyes focusing on your slowly darkening eyes.

He's watched peoples life drain out of their eyes, but never before, has he wanted to look away so badly, only to be forced to stare by his fear.

Sound came crashing down on his consciousness, he mind moving faster than his lips as he screamed into his radio for medical, grasping for your body as he pulled you into the shadows. His hands never shook the way they did as they tried their hardest to act confident. Keegan's mind rushed to remember his basic life support training,

"Pressure...." His voice drudged in worry, his eyes were filled with a crazed look, unable to properly focus as he felt the burning panic rose up his throat, his hands clasping around your flesh. Sharp sounds of torn clothes, knifes against fabric, the lack of warmth.

The lack of you.

Although it had been a day, it seemed as though no time had passed. Muscles moved in memorized movements, shooting, announcing, ordering, and following without a hitch. But he wasn't there, neither were you. Keegans mind felt empty as he fell back into his seat at the debriefing, voices of his superiors becoming a buzz in his ears, broken by the vibration on his thigh.

"Hey, thought you would be interested in dropping by the infirmary?"

Never more in his life was Keegan grateful for the nurse he befriended. His knee bounced, teeth digging into the pink flesh of his lips as he watched the clock tick on his wrist. Each moment felt too long, the lousy mouth of his captain never seeming more annoying than now. Clock struck two. Two o'clock, just like it had when you were shot.

He shot up, disregarding the usual chit-chat he sat through with his teammates as he stormed to the infirmary, your name ringing like a cowbell, bringing him to you. His feet rushed passed familiar faces, glancing with a systematic nod, not stopping. Every step reminded him of every moment he didn't help you, when he watched blood spill from your body, when he watched as you were dying.

Hospitals were always eerily clean, despite the copious amount of lives that were held there. And it always made it worse when you realized ever beep that ticked in a, hopefully, forever constant beat, was someones life. The thought terrorized Keegan as he stood before the door with the dreaded sound of incessant beeping, murmurs of a T.V. screen just behind that piece of wood on hinges. He never thought that his skill to listen, just like it would in missions, would be used to make sure that the electronic beating of your heart rate monitor, didn't change, didn't stop. The door handle was just as cold as the rest of the hospital, bringing no comfort to the trembling hand of the wicked soldier.

Your ears perked at the sound of your name, head snapping to the door. Eyes sparkling, you smiled, so sweetly as you whispered his name weekly,

"Keegan?" The sound broke him. Even with tubes in your arms, dug in eye bags, and obviously a little delirious from pain killers. you still smiled at him. The strings of his heart tightened like a painful knot, eyes burning with irresistible tears. His bit-in lips part, your name barely a whisper on his tongue as he rushes to you.

"You look like you're doing well," He responds, tightly gripping the metal bars the sat on the side of you bed, looking down to your exhausted figure. His eyes glazed over each figure, making sure they were as familiar as they were a few days ago. "that's the least you could do after that move."

His tongue was sharp, unintentionally, causing the sting of hurt, pulling your lips into a straight line. You look down, whispering, "Y.... you're right about that, huh?" You chuckle, almost upset. It was hard to swallow your saliva when you heard him exhale sharply.

He always did that when you disappointed him.

"Look, kid" His fingers messaged his forehead, you knew without looking, head still hung low.

"M' not a kid, you know," You croaked, endeared by the name, but too defensive to actually accept it.

"You are to me." Keegan couldn't control the anger that seeped into his voice, his hands tightening around the cold metal. "You are a kid, when you act like that on the field," Nothing about his voice was kind, it wasn't loud, no, but it was full of a venom you've never tasted from him.

"C'mon Kee-"

"No." Firm, an order. His eyes glared down at you, hiding away the worry, the desperation to hold you, to celebrate the slight colour in your face. Taking a deep breath, he sighs, "I'm not angry,"

You roll your eyes at his sentence, turning away with a pout. He watched you, sighing once more as his shaky hand placed itself on your shoulder,

"I was... shit," He retracts his hand awkwardly, much to your dismay, to pinch his forehead. Your mind ran a million miles, trying, and struggling, to fill in the blanks as he thought of his words. Your lips parted, face timidly turning up to meet his eyes, apparent that you had settled on the worst possible actions.

"I thought I lost you."

Your eyes met his, the always unreadable sergeant's eyes filled with an overwhelming amount of emotion. Never, ever, did you expect the man you admired to deeply to look at the way he was looking at you, to return that burning adoration, the sight alone enough to make your lip quiver

It was never just admiration. For neither of you.

A small smile pinched onto the sergeant's face, a deep sigh passing from him as he tilted his head down, taking his gaze with him. Were it not for his prediction, you most definitely would have pounced on him. His hand laced with you, gently holding you still.

"A-are you alright?" A meek voice peeks in from beyond the curtain, in wrinkled nurse uniform. Blushing madly, you stammer and nod, waving her off. Your heart beat was on a screen after all.

Keegan on the other hand, snorts as he hold in a laugh, leaning in to grin down at you, "Do I make you nervous, pretty?" His eyes were sharp, fervor-filled as they bore into yours, too much to look away from. His face inched closer to your, slowly approaching you, grin descending into a small smile. "God," His voice hung like boulders as his breath brushed across your cheek, down your neck, hot and fast. His lips pressed to the corner of yours,

"You're just trying to get me fired, aren't you?" His voice was gruff, playful even. You blush as you look up at him, rolling your eyes as you let out the breath you forgot you were holding.

"You're such a tease."

"Says you, fucking getting yourself shot." You jaw drops, glaring at him as you stammer, trying to wave your hands as he still gently holds them down,

"You're saying you've never gotten shot on field?" The grin on his face would forever be engraved in your mind. His low voice rings in your ears as he finally moves his face directly in front of yours, eyes locking.

He smiles, his lips softly pressing into yours, the blaring beeping of your heart rate monitor no longer worries him, though maybe the nurse, as he pulls away, sighing into your neck as he whispers, smirking against your skin. "Not while trying to impress my crush."

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"keegan is super perfectionis and reader is impuslive and they ifght n someone goes in near death experience and they go mua mua" <- thats how I remembered the req after I deleted it lmao

im not gonna shut up about that omfg im so upset over that like i swear to god. i think it was @/bad smth idk but the pfp was blue IF IT WAS YOU IM SO SORRY.