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the-hearteater · 1 year

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Kindred Spirit (Rollo Flamme x Reader)

The Rollo propaganda worked on me. This fic is heavily inspired by @linawritestwst 's Rollo x Reader who is scared of magic, which you can find here:

TW: PTSD flashbacks, panic attacks (?), self deprecating, mentions of Chapter 6

You look at the crowd of smiling faces, joyful chatter fills the air as festive music plays in the background.

But for some reason, you can’t bring yourself to get drunk on the happy occasion too. You feel abnormally tired, as if an imaginary weight has settled its home on your shoulders. Truthfully, you’ve been feeling fatigued for the past months, biting your tongue and forcing yourself to go through life because who else will make Grim attend his class?

Really, someone should award you an oscar. This mask of yours has been ingrained through memory, the false pretence of everything is fine.

Weirdly enough, said mask has been slowly cracking. The proof lies in your inability to enjoy the festival. To be fair, you did help in saving six individuals from their own overblot. Not a surprise, the alternative is death after all.

You didn’t ask for this.

You spend your nights crying in silence, grieving for your old life of familiarity. You were unjustly torn away from your routine, harshly shoving you into the arms of a stranger. Forced to adapt and survive, your mind pushes the events that occurred and focused on survival.

Once upon a time, you were intrigued by the concept of magic, but now you know better than to trust it. It’s volatile and it plays by its own rules, unpredictable and unstable. It is like walking on a tightrope with no safety net. Better to depend on your two hands, knowing what to expect and the worst-case scenarios that accompany it.

Standing at a distance, your friends (is it right to call them friends when they were the very ones that also hurt you?) laugh with the crowd, sparks shooting out of their pens. You really should wear a smile, it would be suspicious to see a frown on such an occasion.

The sea of stalls and people blended together, your stomach churning as the grape juice you drank felt more like overdue milk. Colours swirl in your sight as they blurred together, your brain foolishly wonders if someone is trying to split your skull open.

“Are you alright?”

Someone holds your hand, stabilising your swaying body. Their voice is rather familiar…

“Sorry, I was feeling rather nauseous,” you muttered, your free hand holding your heavy head. “Thank you, I think I am better now.”

A poorly crafted lie, you are definitely in no condition to act as carefree as your friends.

“Are you sure? You look rather pale.”

Your vision managed to clear up, revealing your saviour to be the student council’s president of the residential college, Rollo Flamme.

“I am fine, thank you for your help, Rollo.” You repeated, hoping he will leave you alone and be on his way.

“I apologise for being curt, but it’s not good to lie, (Y/n). You clearly do not seem to be in a good condition to stroll about the city,” Rollo politely replied. “Do you need to see a nurse?”

I wish it was that easy to cure me, you thought.

“I am probably worn out from all the walking I had to do, don’t worry about me!” your attempt at a lighthearted reply comes off more as weary.

“If you allow me, let me support you lest you fall or faint,” Rollo said. Was that a hint of concern? Or is it just him being responsible? For now, you considered it as the latter. Nobody should be worried about someone they will never meet again after all.

Not wanting to fall flat on your face, you accepted his offer. Holding his shoulder, both of you approached your schoolmates. Shooting off fireworks, the sounds of explosions erupted from their pens.

You are suddenly transported back into the underground of S.T.Y.X

Headquarters, where danger lurks in every corner. You need to help with the thunder spear too! Everyone is fighting Idia and you can’t help because you don’t have magic.

You can’t do anything.

You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can't do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything. You can’t do anything Youcantdoanything.Youcantdoanything.Youcan’tdoanythingyoucan’tdoanythingyoucan’tdoanythingYoucan’tdoanythingyoucan’tdoanythingyoucan’tdoanythingyoucantdoanythingyoucantdoanythingyoucantdoanything-

“(Y/n)!” Rollo’s voice pierced through the world, releasing you from your torture. You find yourself taking in rapid short breaths and your body trembling. Your eyes are hot from tears as you distantly hear Rollo telling you to match his breathing.

When you calm down from your panic, what’s left is shame. The shame of being a mess when you should be put together. A fraud.

A sea of sorrys flood your lips, hoping that if you say enough, he will forget your act. You direct your hate inwards, despising your mask for shattering when it should be glued tightly onto your face.

“Don’t apologise anymore, you will make me feel sad too…” Rollo wipes away your tears gently, worry in his eyes. His actions feel like a routine, as if he had comforted people before. How could he, someone that you hardly know, treat you like he understood your pain?

“It’s alright, nobody is dying,” he assures you, pulling you into a hug. “You’re in the City of Flowers, you are somewhere safe.”

You accepted the hug before breaking into tears again from the kindness of the action.

“I know grief when I see it…” he whispers. Maybe he thought you won’t hear it, but you did. You don’t pry for it is not your place to know.

You finally take in your surroundings, you two seemed to be in a quiet corner of the festival.

Nobody you know, that’s good.

“Maybe it is better if you seek medical help, or at the very least return to your living quarters. You are clearly not in the state to be out here.” Rollo calmly said, softness still evident in his tone.

“I am alright, I am only here for three days. I can’t just let this affect me.” You try to brush it off, not wanting your schoolmates to know of your condition.

The white-haired man looks at you, uncertainty in his eyes. “Very well, then let me escort you,” he stands up and offers you his hand, which you accept.

“Can you please not tell this to the others? I don’t want them to worry for me.” You said as the two of you made your way to your friends.

“I won’t, worry not. It is not my place after all,” Rollo replied. “But, if you will, would you be interested in hearing my personal opinion?”

You nod.

“I think your friends are fools for not noticing your pain.” He said.

This surprises you. You were definitely not expecting that answer. “You mean I need therapy?” you joke. It was not uncommon that a lot of people from your old life needed therapy.

“What I meant was that you have been through a lot. Even though I do not know what you experienced, I see fatigue in your eyes, the one that doesn’t go away through rest-” Rollo looked like he realised something. “Apologies, I spoke out of turn.”

“It is fine. I was the one who agreed on hearing your opinion anyway.”

The two of you were finally with your friends. You stood beside Malleus, smiling at the rowdy group. Is it a fake one or not, you don’t know. You’re too tired to care.

You hear Rollo advising Malleus to not simply use their magic, lest they hurt someone. You can’t help but to agree with this statement, but you choose not to voice it. After all, you are a friend of the future King of Briar Valley. You don’t want to piss Malleus off, not to mention that the rest of your friend group consists of magic users that use it daily in their lives.

You went up to Professor Trein, informing him that you will be sitting at a quiet corner of the street because you were tired. He hums in approval and you leave the respectable teacher.

You weren’t surprised to find Rollo joining you on the bench. After what happened, it would be natural to worry about someone that’s not in a stable condition, right?

“Thank you for helping me,” You sincerely said. “I am grateful for what you’ve done. I am feeling a lot better now, so you don’t need to worry about me.”

“It’s not a problem, it is my duty as the President anyway. I would not be a good host if one of the guests is not taken care of.”

Oh, he thought of you only as a guest. Despite the special treatment he gave you? You thought.

“Do you think that magic is a dangerous thing?”

You pretend to ponder upon this question despite knowing what your answer is, you just can’t bring yourself to say it out.

You open your mouth to speak, but no words fall out. You know what you want to say, yet you physically can’t. You don’t want to lie to yourself either, because the very fact that you are here in this world against your will is proof that you despise the thing.

You think back to what you’ve gone through the past few months. The near-death experiences, the unbearable name-calling that was normalised, the unreasonable demands from Crow-fucking-ley. The more you think, the more your blood boils, giving you the courage (or adrenaline?) to answer.

“I… I used to think it would be wonderful… But now? I have nothing but anger for the damned thing…” you don’t tell him your truth, you don’t feel that safe yet. Maybe in the future, who knows?

Your answer seemed to surprise him, perhaps he too was a kindred spirit?

He looks at his handkerchief, staring at it as if he had something to confess before letting out a sigh. Then, he tells you of a plan. A plan big enough to suck the wretched thing from this world, a plan to make everyone safer.

At first, you were unsure. You still care for your friends after all, you don’t want them to get hurt. Rollo assures you that it won’t harm your friends, it will only take away their magic.

The more you think about it, you realised that it was a good plan, it won’t gravely injure anyone. Sure they will feel tired and maybe a bit of pain, but it's for the greater good like what Rollo said! Nobody will overblot or be seriously injured from magic because there won’t be magic anymore!

You nod your head, agreeing to help him with this plan of his. You just hope it will go smoothly, NRC students are known to keep what they want after all…

Thank you for reading! Reblogs are greatly appreciated!!!

#rollo x reader #rollo flamm #rollo twisted wonderland #twst rollo #twisted wonderland #twst #glorious masquerade #twst masquerade #hearteater writes #tw depressing thoughts #tw depression #tw anxiety #tw panic attack #tw ptsd

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