#honestly you can still use nat in discord too if we talk on there

[aastarions]

i think i’m gonna do an alias change and test the waters so

nat -> celeste

ill be updating my other blog lordofgeos with this alias change too

if you still want to call me nat i really don’t mind but i’ll be putting celeste in my pinned going forth and updating my tags

#announcement i guess #idk ive always gone as my name or a nickname of it #but ive been wanting to change that #for a while now #i love my actual name but im just kinda over my nickname nat LMAO #honestly you can still use nat in discord too if we talk on there

[whatiwillsay]

submission: we need to talk about ttb (spade-riddles)

Hey Cam. Seeing that ask defending TTB’s doxxing has sort of pushed me to finally share some of my story on Tumblr, I guess. I haven’t had the opportunity to talk about this to anyone fully, so this will probably be long, but I hope you don’t mind me venting.

I’m one of the people that got emailed by TTB. I don’t feel comfortable posting this off anon, but I was in a Discord server with you and @bisluthq and some other people back in Dec/Jan. I don’t know if you remember me, but my name on there was one word and began with an L and ended with an S.

I want to share the full story, but I also don’t feel comfortable with sharing certain details publicly because I’m still very wary of getting outed further by her if she sees this, so I’m gonna be vague about some things

Request to her followers — If you see this, please don’t send this to her. Like I’m genuinely asking you not to because I don’t trust her not to cross any more lines. My dad is a major homophobe with serious anger issues who has literally been arrested for violence before, and she doesn’t really think carefully or maybe even care about how any actions she takes could lead to people being harmed, so I’m not eager to see how she might react.

Anyway, I first got an email back in December, and I was really freaked out by it at first. I spoke to one of my mutuals about it, and although we both agreed it was super weird and invasive and creepy, we ended up trying to see the funny side of it. So, I kinda just brushed it off and moved on. I was mainly just really confused about why I had been targeted because at the time, I thought it was only me who’d gotten an email like that. I didn’t understand why she’d specifically targeted me instead of other people who she clearly disliked a lot more.

About a week later, I saw someone on Tumblr mentioning a strange email, and I realised other people must have gotten them too. I spoke to Nat about what happened to me and ended up in the Discord

At the time, I felt like I’d gotten off really easy comparatively to others because I initially didn’t realise that she’d contacted anyone else. And so I tried to act chill about it because I didn’t want to make things about me, but honestly, I was extremely anxious. I felt on edge for over a week. I would keep checking her blog again and again because I was super worried that she would post our personal details publicly. I scrolled through my entire blog from start to finish and deleted a lot of posts that were either personal or that I just didn’t want anyone I knew in real life to read.

This part I have to be vague about because it would basically give away who I am, but it was only a while later when I thought I was in the clear that someone I knew in real life texted me and mentioned seeing a weird email about me. The email had been sent a while back, and they’d been shown it by the original recipient/s. Multiple people had been shown it, but luckily (kinda), only two of those people were actually people I saw on a regular basis

I’m mostly closeted, but I’m kind of technically out to a few of my immediate family members. But it’s very much a DADT situation because they’re not accepting, and they like to just pretend I’m straight. And so I basically have to act closeted even when I’m around them, and I can’t even ALLUDE to being gay.

But with my dad, it’s different. He’s very homophobic. I’m only gonna mention this next part so that people understand what kind of dangerous situation that TTB could have put me in. (And the other people that she doxxed too because she didn’t know how safe their individual situations were). It’s all really personal, and I wouldn’t ordinarily feel comfortable sharing any of this at all, even anonymously, but I think it needs to be said because her actions were extremely fucking irresponsible.

Right, so when I first “came out” to my dad, it was actually an accident, and he reacted… extremely badly. This was back in like… 2018 or 2019, I can’t remember the exact year

(TW // physical abuse, homophobia)

He was extremely angry, literally shaking. He yelled at me, he described in graphic detail how he was going to “break every bone in my body”, “strangle the life out of me”, “drown me”, etc. He kept telling me that I’m disgusting and going to Hell, you get the idea. He was having a lot of fun with making strangling motions and stabbing motions with his hands, and he kept slamming his hand onto the table. That went on for about 15 minutes, and then he stood up and threw a chair from the dining table at me. That was fun lol. And he punched me in the head pretty hard which kinda knocked me back. I felt dizzy, I had to sit down on the floor. At that point, my mum who had been crying and asking him to stop physically intervened, and he ended up storming out of the house instead. My mum’s a genuinely good person btw. She’s a little homophobic, but she cares about me a lot, and I’m very grateful for her. She hates him too, but she’s kinda stuck with him… It wasn’t her fault

He literally hates gay people. He complains about us on the regular. One time, he threw the remote at the TV and cracked the screen just because there was a gay male couple kissing onscreen. Another time, he threw a rock at a gay man on the street. There was also a time where he forced a few of my siblings (who didn’t want to do it) to throw peeled oranges out of the window at people celebrating pride while he drove past them and yelled insults at them. He found that really funny. Anyway, I’m sure you guys get the idea of what kind of person he is

He hasn’t laid a hand on anybody in several months though, so I do think he’s trying to be better at least. Like he’s still verbally abusive and controlling and awful, but I appreciate that he’s at least making an effort to calm down with the hitting and kicking and stuff

Anyway, with my dad, it’s less DADT and more that I think he’s got it in his head that he managed to scare me into “seeing the error of my ways” and that I’ve “stopped choosing to be gay” and that I’m now straight. So, if it had been HIM who had gotten that email, it would’ve been like… extremely bad. Like I’m getting anxious just thinking about it. And this is why I’m so angry at TTB. It was extremely, extremely irresponsible of her to not consider these kinds of possibilities before she sent out her stupid emails. She’s supposed to be an ally, but it didn’t even cross her mind that these emails would lead to people being outed and possibly even harmed?? It’s not okay at all. I’m just very grateful that she didn’t send one to him because I don’t even know what kind of situation I would be in right now.

Anyway, enough about my fucking awful dad… I feel uncomfortable that I even typed all of that out, but I wanted people to understand how dangerous her actions could have been. Like I mean, my dad’s got PTSD and extreme anger issues from his teenage years, so I do try not to judge him TOO harshly, but there’s no excuse for being a huge bigot or occasionally violent. The idea of him being the one who got that email is still so scary to me. Like my heart is racing just thinking about it

One of the people that DID read the email was the male friend I mentioned earlier though. He was shown it by someone else for a particular reason, and he was a very important person to me. Like he was a good guy, we were close, he helped me out with certain personal issues I have and is one of only two people that I know in real life that I felt comfortable confiding in about them. We’d always meet up once a week, sometimes twice, and we’d just talk about stuff and make an effort to help each other out with things. Like he was very important to me.

It turns out that he’d looked through my blog before I’d got around to scrubbing it, and he asked me if I was gay in person the next time we met up. I couldn’t lie because like… he’d have known I was lying right to his face. So, I told him I was, and you should have seen his face. It made me feel so awful about myself. He looked really stunned and shocked and kinda uncomfortable. Like it got so awkward, and I started rambling and making things worse. He was avoiding eye contact, and my voice was shaking.

I ended up making up an excuse to leave about 5 mins later and had an actual anxiety attack. Again, this is embarrassing and something I’d never usually talk about online, but I just want to get it all off my chest so that I can move past it all.

So, I was like on the verge of tears (I don’t cry easily), I couldn’t breathe properly, I was pacing around the building, and I just wanted to escape, so I headed straight for the doors. There was a queue of about 100 people lined up and waiting to leave, and I couldn’t think straight or breathe and just needed to be outside, so I tried to go out through the other exit which is for staff only. The security guard stopped me and basically publicly humiliated me in front of all of those people. He loudly shamed me and said I “didn’t have any decency” for attempted to jump the queue, lectured me in this really condescending tone, and then sent me right to the back of that huge line. Meanwhile, I was literally in the midst of a bad anxiety attack.

And then I eventually got outside and had to call my mum to come and pick me up instead of just making my own way home like I usually do. She’s amazing though tbh because she actually came to get me and didn’t even question why. I had to skip all of my plans for the rest of the day and instead just hid upstairs in my bedroom with the lights off until the next day. I refused to tell any of my family members what had happened even though they kept asking. I just felt so, so awful, and my anxiety was through the roof

To be honest, before that happened, my mindset was like: “I mean, if I get outed, it obviously wouldn’t be good, but I think I’d be able to deal with it fine”. But then, when it actually happened, and I saw the way my close friend reacted, I had like a whole emotional breakdown lol. It’s like, you think you’d be fairly chill in a situation, but when it actually happens, your reaction can be really unpredictable. I was so embarrassed by everything about that entire incident. I didn’t even want to show my face the next day.

It’s been almost two months since that happened, and in that entire time, my friend has contacted me once. We literally used to meet up once or twice a week (and during lockdown, we’d do video calls or phone calls instead), but since then, we’ve barely even spoken. Things are just so awkward now. I know this sounds stupid, but I feel like TTB’s taken one of my best friends away from me. I don’t think he’s a homophobe or anything, he has openly gay friends and is fairly accepting, but I think it’s just the way that he found out that has just made things so weird between us now. I feel like if I’d had the chance to come out to him myself in my own way, he wouldn’t have reacted like that. But I’m gonna text him next week and see if we can maybe try to fix our friendship, but I doubt it at this point

The other people who were shown the email, I mostly just avoid. I don’t really care about them knowing that much because I wasn’t close to them, but it’s just really embarrassing knowing that they probably scrolled through my Tumblr blog before I scrubbed it

And about Tumblr… This used to be the only place that I could fully be myself. It was like a “safe space” for me which feels ironic now. But I haven’t been active on my blog since December. I still lurk occasionally, but I just don’t feel comfortable here anymore. I did consider deleting my current blog and starting afresh with a new one, but I don’t think it’d make much of a difference… Like she’s kind of ruined Tumblr for me. I do still enjoy reading people’s blogs every now and then, but I don’t feel relaxed here anymore, I just feel on edge.

It’s mainly the fact that SHE’S still here. She still has a platform, she still has a bunch of followers. It’s been so hard seeing her face next to no consequences whatsoever for the horrible things that she’s done to so many different people. And it upsets me that she hasn’t even acknowledged that what she did was wrong. Plus, it makes me feel even worse that the Hard Kay blogs and some other people are still supporting her and pretending that this whole thing just didn’t happen. Like do they just not care? Or is it that she’s twisted things and made them believe that the situation was different to what it actually was?

And tbh, this whole situation has even set me back in my own sort of personal self-acceptance journey. I had such bad internalised homophobia when I was younger, and it took me so many years to get to a place where I had mostly accepted myself. But now I just feel ashamed again, and I’ve gone back to my old habit of trying to force myself to be attracted to men. Like I downloaded Tinder the other day and set my preference to men and was swiping through profiles. It’s kinda silly actually. I did snap out of it and delete the app the next day though. But I don’t know, I feel like this whole thing has just kinda fucked with me a bit. I am trying to work this stuff out and get back to normal though. I think I’ll be good again in maybe a month or so, hopefully.

And… yeah. I just really resent her, and this situation upsets me. Because the reason she did this was so petty and ridiculous, and I guess she didn’t even realise how much it would impact people? Like I do know that my situation wasn’t as bad as some of the other people’s situations, and I feel really bad for them, and I hope they’re all doing okay. I can’t imagine what it must have been like for them. But it still has impacted me a lot more than I actually thought it would. I thought I’d get over it within a couple of weeks. But it’s been like two months, and I’m still not completely over it

I know it might not sound like a huge thing, but being outed really does affect you, even if it’s only to a few people. Because to me, I feel like I’ve had my sense of like, security and comfort taken away, and it’s kinda distressing. Sorry if I sound dramatic with any of this, I just really needed to say all of this stuff to other people besides myself lol

Like her actions have literally led to me being outed to a few people. A close friendship that I had has basically been ruined. I don’t feel comfortable or secure on Tumblr anymore, even though it used to be an important outlet for me. I’ve had a resurgence of anxiety about my sexuality. Etc.

And again, my dad is extremely homophobic and literally made death threats to me and physically attacked me back when I accidentally came out to him in 2018 or 2019. And if he had gotten that email, I don’t even know what would have happened. I don’t think he would have like… SERIOUSLY physically harmed me, but there would definitely have been a repeat of the first incident. More throwing chairs at me and hitting and screaming and death threats. I don’t really want to think about it.

It just bothers me that she didn’t even consider that? Like did it not even cross her mind? And my dad is bad, but I’m sure there are people in the fandom who have even worse parents, and she could have got one of those people instead. It’s just so… I don’t know, it’s just so frustrating to me.

Anyway, I just hate her for what she did… Like maybe I shouldn’t, but I really do resent her so much, and I don’t think I could forgive her even if she apologised to us all (which I don’t think she even would because she doesn’t seem to have any decency whatsoever). The least she could do is at least express some kind of remorse, but she just genuinely doesn’t care, and that’s super messed up. All over some stupid Tumblr blog that is much less important than she thinks it is.

But anyway… I apologise for the whole rant, and if anybody read all the way down to here, I appreciate it. I do actually feel a bit better now that I’ve got this all typed out. And I’m sorry for the oversharing lol, I usually don’t do this, but I just felt like I really needed to tell people and get it off my chest so that I can try to get over it — L

submisssion⬆️⬆️⬆️

ok L i am trying to remain calm here because this isn’t about me.  but i am very emotional right now.  i am so so so infinitely sorry that you had to go through this harrowing and terrifying experience.  ttb (now blogging under spade-riddles) is absolutely disgusting, lower than dirt, that she would put your life, safety, and well-being at risk over a fucking kaylor blog.

please please please im me or get in touch somehow because i want to offer you support.  have you been financially impacted by this?  we can raise money.  do you need therapy?  we can help you find the support you need.  this community is unequivocally here for you.  whatever you need, if it’s in my power to help you get it, i will.  you have my solemn promise on that.

i am so deeply and desperately sorry that you have gone through this.  i was shaking while reading your story.

i am in touch with other people and we are in discussion about the best way to let tumblr know what happened.  this will be a safe space for you (and all of us) again if it’s the last thing i do.  this community is 100% here for you in any way we can help, sending you all the support and love we have.

#submission #tw: abuse #tw: homophobia

[awanderingdeal]

When a loss isn't really a loss

This is just over 5000 words of O'Darwin smut and general silliness. Enjoy. Some of this I have posted as a live write before on the discord, but it's been heavily edited and added to.

Rating: E

CW: Explicit sex, food talk

Please message me if you I missed any content warnings.

All of these characters come from the fanfic Sweater Weather and Credit for them goes to @lumosinlove

"I'm going to jump in the shower and then I'll be ready to collect payment," Natalie smirked, shaking her ass at her boyfriends as she bent down to peel off her snowy boots at the door.

"Absolutely not," Alex scoffed, smacking her butt, although she couldn't feel much through the padding of her thermals and ski pants "You cheated."

"I made one tiny comment," Natalie argued, setting her boots to the side, and stepping a little further into the cabin to take off her jacket. "It’s not my fault your brain is in your dick."

"Okay, but it's not as if anybody is really losing, is it?" Kasey said pushing past Alex, having mentioned multiple times by now that he was ready to be out of the cold. "Let's be real, eating you out is the real prize here, babe."

"Kiss-ass," Alex grumbled.

"I'll kiss your ass anytime, Al,'' Kasey retorted. Alex muttered something under his breath, but Kasey ignored him, continuing to shrug off his clothes until he was left in only his base layers. "I'll start a fire whilst you hop in the shower, Nat."

“Thanks, love,” Natalie pecked a kiss to Kasey’s cheek, the slight scruff he had decided to sport for the trip was rough against her lips. Alex had finally managed to get his boots off, and joined the two of them in pulling off his skiwear. She drew up onto her tiptoes, not letting the couple of inches of extra height Alex had on her be a deterrent as she ruffled his hair and placed a kiss on his cheek too. “Suck it up, sweetheart.”

“Hey!” Alex protested. “I want a rematch tomorrow!” he called as she retreated from the room, her shoulders shaking with laughter.

The warm water felt wonderful cascading down Natalie’s body, soothing her tired muscles. She could have stayed under it forever; the thought of Alex and Kasey waiting for her in the lounge the only thing motivating her to move through the routine of washing her hair. The coconut scent of her conditioner permeated the room as she stepped out of the shower and piled her hair beneath a towel.

She stepped out into the short hallway, hearing hushed bickering coming from the living room. Rolling her eyes, she yelled to let them know the bathroom was unoccupied. “Boys! The shower is free!” The bickering continued, the topic switching from where the next log should be placed, to which of them should be left to finish the job. Natalie considered interrupting to inform them she could probably do the task quicker than either of them, but she left them to it, heading to the bedroom.

She hummed to herself whilst she rummaged through her suitcase, considering the new lyrics she’d doodled on the flight here, until she felt the slippery material of the satin pyjamas she was looking for.

“Aha.” She gave a satisfied smile, pulling the bralette and shorts on and looked in the mirror. “Damn, Darcy,” Natalie approved, turning to appreciate the way the material clung to her ass in all the right ways. She adjusted the top slightly, gave a satisfied nod and shook her still slightly damp hair from the towel, letting it fall down around her shoulders in loose waves. For a moment, she considered blow drying it, but she preferred the way it looked when it was allowed to dry naturally. If Alex and Kasey wanted to have sex, then they could deal with it.

The lounge was empty when Natalie returned, the logs and fire - lighter abandoned on the ground. She snorted at the tiny tepee that had been built in the grate, imagining Alex lecturing Kasey on the technique, until they decided it was more fun to take a shower together. It was a far too regular occurrence for Alex to remind them he had been a boy scout only to completely fail at the skills he was supposed to have learnt was comical. At this point, she suspected the only useful thing to come out of it were the photos of a small Alex dressed in little shorts, grinning proudly at his badge-covered sash. The organisation could go fuck themselves, but she had to admit the images were adorable.

Natalie gathered the materials, making light work of getting the fire started. Her own skills came from weekend camping trips with her family, her parents having encouraged her to pull her weight alongside her brother. Kasey wasn't one to embrace nature, more inclined towards the comfort of hotel rooms and running water. Still, Natalie was daydreaming about dragging him and Alex on long hikes when the pair of them interrupted it, walking back into the lounge with sheepish expressions.

"In our defence -" Alex started, his sentence ending abruptly when he properly took in Natalie's appearance. "Excuse me, nobody told me we were supposed to be looking hot. I need to go and get changed," he gestured to the pair of joggers sitting loosely on his hips.

Kasey shook his head, quickly grabbing the back of Alex's t-shirt, halting his retreat. "Don't bother, I don't plan on them being on for long."

"Okay, yeah, I could be down with that," Alex agreed. "But fuck, Nat. Warn a guy next time."

Natalie laughed, pushing herself up from the floor and relocating to the sofa, a few steps away. "Where would the fun in that be?"

"It's alright, Al. You could be wearing a bin bag and you'd still be hot," Kasey said, releasing Alex's t-shirt from his grip.

"Aww babe," Alex cooed. His eyes flicked from Kasey to Natalie, pointing his thumb at Kasey. "Can you believe this guy manages to convince people that he's a tough man?"

"Hey, real men talk about their emotions," Kasey shrugged. "We did a whole campaign on it, soon after you joined the Rangers. Remember?"

"I do, the t-shirt they gave you was too fucking small and I swear I nearly combusted,” Alex tipped his back slightly whilst he laughed. Natalie loved watching the two of them interact. There was something light about it, almost as if they seemed to forget the rest of the world was there. "Nat, it was honestly sinful.”

Okay, perhaps they forgot everybody but her. And frankly, Natalie was honoured.

"Sinful huh? I approve of sin," Natalie raised an eyebrow, patting the seat beside her. "Get over here." She didn't have to ask twice, soon flanked on either side by her hockey boys. She nudged her shoulder against Alex's. "So, have you reconsidered that maybe you did actually lose earlier." Alex ran his tongue over his lips, dragging his eyes over her form. "I could be convinced," he murmured, fingers trailing over Natalie's thigh. "I still want another race tomorrow though."

"You know I'm going to win again," Natalie smirked, leaning in to let her breath skim over his ear. "What are you waiting for? I'm ready," she whispered, punctuating her words with a kiss to his jaw, spreading her legs a little further. Alex stumbled a little as dropped to his knees in front of her. Apparently he was excited.

"It really is a shame to take these off, they're so pretty," Alex sighed, grasping the waistband of the shorts, although he didn't seem to be too disappointed to be sliding the silky fabric down her legs.

He kissed a trail up her thighs, each kiss sending a tiny shiver up Natalie's spine. Her body was tight with the anticipation of what was coming. They weren't new to this, Alex spent a lot of time between her legs, but in her opinion, the thrill had only increased. She knew how good he could make her feel now. Alex hooked his hands under her knees and shifted her a little closer to him. Leaning forward, he dragged his tongue through the damp already forming between her legs, tasting her with slow, leisurely licks. Natalie whined, low at the back of her throat, her hips pushing up and legs tightening around Alex as she sought more of his attention. He obliged, pressing his tongue flat against her clit, bringing his fingers to play at it, his beard rough against her skin as he sucked eagerly at her centre.

She let her head tip back, finding Kasey's strong hold behind her. He kissed gently at the exposed skin of her neck, capturing her mouth to swallow her next moan. "Can you tell me what you want next Nat? You're going to come on Al's face, yeah? Then what?"

Natalie managed a nod, her hands flying to tangle in Alex's hair as he dipped his tongue inside her. "Fuck, Alex. Do that again." Alex repeated the precise flick of his tongue, his small chuckle at Natalie's string of expletives, reverberating through her.

"Hey," Kasey's hand gripped her chin carefully, getting her focus. "What next?"

Natalie couldn't think what came next when Alex was working his magic, any coherent thought she managed to form was forced away by the skilful tease of his mouth.

Kasey traced the wildflowers inked around her belly button, his breath hot against her ear. "Do you want me to fuck you?" He snaked his hands upwards, ducking into the cup of her bralette to toy with her nipple. "Or Haz? Or maybe both?"

"Yes," Natalie gasped, rocking her hips against Alex's mouth. "Yes, yes yes." She wanted that. She wanted all of it.

"It's alright, babe. We've got you," Kasey continued to tug at her nipples, each pull sending a shiver down her spine. She writhed under their touch, her body unsure what it wanted more of. Alex pulled back a little, soothing Natalie's whine by replacing his mouth with his fingers, pressing them inside her.

"Please," The cry fell from her lips, guiding Alex's head back down. He followed enthusiastically, fingers still pushing into her as he lapped at her clit, grazing lightly over it with his teeth. She urged his mouth harder against her, the familiar tingle of pleasure playing at the ends of her limbs.

"That's it love, come on him. I can't wait to taste you on him,” Kasey encouraged.

“Fuck Al - I'm so close," she whimpered, her breath coming in quick pants.

A warmth pooled in her stomach, seemingly every muscle in her body tensing as Alex upped his efforts, his face buried in her as he nipped and sucked and licked. Kasey's mouth was back on her, his hands squeezing at her breasts. She couldn't tell where each of her whimpers and mewls started and ended anymore, the sounds melding into a symphony of pleasure; her boys playing her body like a practised instrument.

Natalie let herself voice her pleasure without restraint, enjoying the fact their cabin was nestled into a secluded spot in the forest and nobody would be able to hear them.

"Oh fuck, yes. Right there. Don’t stop. Gonna come." The words fell from her lips rambling and desperate, her hand curling tighter into Alex's hair in warning. Her world narrowed as she came, everything but the intense pleasure searing through her becoming irrelevant in that small moment. The two of them worked her through, coaxing every second of bliss from her they could, until the spasms slowed and she relaxed against Kasey.

"I believe I said something about sharing." Kasey grasped Alex's hand, leaning down to help him close the gap between them. Alex's face was sticky with her come, but Kasey didn't hesitate to crash their mouths together. Natalie watched them kiss above her, the euphoria still making her thoughts a little hazy, but a small excitement told her that she was definitely still horny, despite the fact she had barely recovered from the last orgasm.

Kasey pulled away; the corners of his mouth turned up into a soft smile that didn't quite seem to match the situation. "Messy boy," he chirped, cupping Alex's jaw and gathering the slick onto his fingers. Slipping them between his lips, Kasey sucked them, giving a long moan at the taste.

Alex's back clicked as he clambered back up onto the couch properly. The juxtaposition between the reminder of the reality of human bodies, and the almost pornographic gesture she had just witnessed from Kasey made Natalie snort a laugh. “Are you okay there, old man?" she flashed Alex a grin.

Alex poked her gently in her side, chuckling a laugh against her lips. "Shut up."

Natalie shoved him in the arm playfully. "Thank you, that was awesome. Maybe I'll let you win tomorrow so I can return the favour."

Out of the corner of her eye, Natalie saw Kasey reach down to palm himself through his shorts. She pecked a kiss to Alex's cheek, his face still shiny with her come. "Why don't you go and wash that off before it starts to get itchy. I want all your attention on me when you're fucking me."

Alex let his head drop back against the sofa with a groan, and Natalie laughed as his eyes seemed to glaze over slightly. A filthy comment never failed to get him worked up.

"Okay, Okay, I'm going. Don't do anything too interesting until I get back," Alex pushed off the sofa eagerly, dragging his eyes over Natalie and Kasey before he hurried to the bathroom in a half-jog.

“Bring the lube too!” Natalie called after Alex, swinging her leg over to straddle Kasey’s lap. Kasey smirked as he lifted his head to catch Natalie’s lips with his own, pulling back from the kiss only once their breaths were coming in heavy pants.

“Think that was too interesting?” he murmured, burying his face into her shoulder..

“I don’t know. What do you think about this?” Natalie ground her hips down, drawing a whine from Kasey.

“Definitely too interesting,” Kasey gasped, bucking up into the contact.

“I’m coming, I’m coming,” Alex shouted, his footsteps heavy in the hallway.

“That’s what I’m going to be saying in about two seconds if you don’t stop,” Kasey quipped, setting his hands on Natalie’s waist, his fingers squeezing gently.

“What took you so -” Natalie looked up as Alex hurried into the room, his feet slipping slightly on the hardwood. “Where are your clothes?”

Natalie had to cling onto Kasey's shoulders to avoid being thrown from his lap when he turned his whole body, whipping his head around at the question. God, Kasey was so cool until he wasn't at all.

“Figured I wouldn’t need them for this next part,” Alex smiled. His face was so expressive, the emotion lifting his entire face. He swept his hand through his hair smoothly as if he hadn’t just nearly landed on his ass. “I did bring lube though, and condoms,” he added, showcasing the aforementioned objects. “Still waiting on that second set of results after Philly.”

Two sets of testing. Two weeks apart. The second set at least a month after the event. Plus twice a year routine testing. Those were the rules they had laid out for not using a condom if any of them had sex with somebody outside of them and a few other select people they trusted. It wasn’t fool proof, but it was what the three of them were comfortable with.

"Get over here,” Natalie beckoned. “I was thinking we could have a do-over of Vegas?”

“Vegas?” How Alex managed to make the thoughtful tilt of his head look almost puppyish, sauntering over buck naked, and his hands full of sex paraphernalia, Natalie would never know. He glanced at the cabin door, eyes widening slightly.

“Yep,” Natalie sniggered. “No room service to interrupt here.”

“I think we’ve already established that you are the brains of this relationship, eh?” Kasey prodded her in the side. Natalie was so busy trying to escape the fingers tickling under her last rib that she didn’t hear Alex dropping to his knees behind her, startling as his hair brushed against her cheek. “Stop it,” she laughed, batting away Kasey’s hands, her head tipping back into the kiss Alex was pressing into the curve of her neck.

“Let’s try not to have anybody end up on the floor this time, Kase?” Alex returned the laugh, his steady weight behind her the only thing that was preventing her fall.

“I will bite you,” Kasey lifted a hand from Natalie’s hip to show Alex his middle finger.

“Is that a promise?”

“Do you two want the room to yourself?” Natalie chuckled, pushing her ass back against Alex. She chuckled as his cock twitched in response. “Hmm, I’ll take that as a no. Enough talk then?”

“Fuck, I want to rim you first, please?” Alex groaned lowly, hauling himself from the floor. “And you sir, are wearing too many clothes. Rectify that.” He took the seat next to Kasey, curling his fingers around his jaw and pulling into a needy kiss.

“Oh, he’s bossy today. Better do as he says, Sugar,” Natalie chuckled, sliding from Kasey's lap. He remained seated, his eyes following her every move whilst she quickly dragged one of the armchairs so that it was opposite the sofa. Satisfied, she returned to him, for once being the one to look down at him. She gave him a soft smile, tucking a loose strand of his hair behind his ear. “Come now, There’s a front row seat for you once you’re ready,” she said, hooking her finger into the neckline of the old faded Gryffindor tee he was wearing and urging him to stand.

“And I didn’t even buy tickets,” Kasey laughed lightly, pulling the t-shirt over his head. Natalie shoved him gently, shaking her head at the terrible joke.

Still smiling, Natalie draped herself over the arm of the sofa, her back arched and feet resting on Alex’s thighs. She glanced over her shoulder to find Alex’s gaze fixed past her on Kasey undressing. She couldn’t really blame him, letting herself watch as Kasey shoved his sweatpants down seemingly endless legs. The pants hit the ground with a quiet thud.

“Fuck, I forgot my cell was in there,” Kasey muttered.

“You need to work on your act, babe,” Alex snorted.

The trance-like weight that had filled the room lifted and Natalie dug her toes into Alex’s leg, garnering his attention. “Since you asked so nicely,” she grinned, dancing her fingers over the curve of her ass.

“I did, didn’t I?” Alex hummed, his hand covering Natalie’s. It was warm, and even though his eyes were dark with anticipation, the grasp was gentle. “Just relax, watch Kase,” he said, squeezing their fingers together lightly, nudging her hand away as he let go.

Natalie listened to him, tucking her arms beneath her head and turning to watch Kasey. Alex’s lips were soft against her skin, pressing kisses everywhere from the top of her thighs to the base of her spine. Kasey finished undressing, taking his time to create a meticulously neat stack on the coffee table, leaving only his underwear to the side. She caught his quick look at Alex, but she was too slow to read whatever communication they’d been having, both of their expressions quickly schooled back into innocence. She huffed, any irritation she had felt wiped away by the nip of Alex’s teeth on her ass.

Kasey folded himself into the armchair Natalie had moved, one leg tucked casually beneath the other. The position left his cock exposed and Natalie was about to make a casual quip when Alex let his breath whisper over her asshole. Her whole body tensed, Kasey wrapping his hand around the length of his cock at the same time as Alex let his tongue brush over her sensitive nerve endings. “Fuck, Al,” she whipped her head around, quickly turning to look back at Kasey who was teasing himself with slow strokes. She whimpered, unsure where she wanted to look.

“Sssh,” Alex soothed, “Watch our boy.”

Natalie couldn’t have told you how long it was until Alex shifted again. A few minutes maybe? Perhaps more. That first intense pleasure of his tongue pushing into her slowly morphed into something more relaxing. It was an odd contrast to Kasey getting more and more worked up, his groans escalating until he bucked into his fist one last time, quickly enveloping the head of his cock with his boxers.

“Damn, Snow. Come here,” Alex beckoned Kasey over once he had taken a second to get his body back under his control, his legs still a little wobbly as he made his way over.

Natalie hadn’t even noticed the lazy circles her hips were rubbing into the sofa below her, until Alex stilled them. “Are you ready to take some fingers now, Nat?” he asked, rubbing his thumbs into the back of her thighs in a slow massage.

“So fucking ready.” Natalie rocked back a little to stretch her muscles out. Now that Alex’s tongue wasn’t working her into a euphoric state, she could feel her back protesting the position. “Remind me why we’re doing this here and not in the bedroom again?”

“Something about someone wanting to say they had fucked in front of a fireplace in a cabin,” Kasey drawled.

“Oh yeah, who would that have been?” Natalie gave a small smirk. Perhaps there were easier things they could have done out here, but she was determined to fulfil her fantasy completely.

“You want to switch it up? Kase could lie under you, whilst I prep your booty?”

Natalie laughed, sitting back on her heels to let Kasey lie where she’d been. “I’m officially adding booty to the list of words we don’t say during sex.”

“Such a party pooper," Alex quipped, sticking his tongue out at the eye roll he received from Natalie. He chucked a condom in Kasey’s direction, the latter plucking it from the air with ease. Natalie waited for him to roll it on, and then swung her hips over his. He wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her down into a kiss.

“Hey,” Kasey grunted.

“Hey to you too, did you enjoy yourself over there?” Natalie mumbled against his lips, content in the security of his hug.

Kasey hummed, “I like watching you two. You’re my favourite people in the world y’know and you’re both incredibly hot.”

“Jesus,” Natalie huffed out a breath. “Do you want me to start crying?” she chuckled, kissing Kasey again, slow and long. Alex muttered something about them being too cute, before she felt the cool drip of lube between her butt cheeks, long fingers chasing it soon after. Alex took his time, adding more lube with each new finger. Kasey’s hands roamed endlessly over her back, his mouth stealing each approving whine from hers. It seemed unclipping her bralette and pulling the material from between them. She shivered as her nipples brushed against his skin, her body taught with anticipation.

“I’m going to come like this if one of you doesn’t fuck me soon,” Natalie gasped, grinding him. She could feel his cock growing harder each time it slipped through the wet slick pooling between her legs and she wanted nothing more than to take charge.

She didn’t have to though, and sometimes, that was just as nice. “I’ve got you babe,” Alex said, pulling his fingers from her, kissing the back of her neck to quiet the small whine she gave at the emptiness. His lips turned up into a smile against her skin and then he was gone.

Somewhere behind her, she heard the familiar tear of Alex opening a condom, but most of her attention was sought by Kasey. “Can’t wait to be inside of you,” he whispered, brushing her hair from the side of her face. “It’s always so good. And Al’s going to be right there as well. I bet I’ll be able to feel him. We’re going to make you feel so good.”

"Big promises, Kasey Winter," she teased, knowing there was nothing but truth behind the words. Even after all these years, things hadn't gotten boring. Sex wasn't the most important thing in their relationship, and if it had to stop tomorrow for some reason they had s0 much more, still it was something they both valued. Not everything new they tried worked out, but they never took each other for granted and they always had fun and she loved it.

Alex wasn't the first person they'd shared their bed with, however it had quickly become clear he was different. She couldn't deny there had been a small niggling part of her that had wondered if it would weaken her and Kasey's relationship. Of course, Alex had proved her wrong, slotting in perfectly. There had been issues, things they needed to work through, and there always would be. Nevertheless, Alex made things better.

"Natalie?" Alex asked, his fingers tapping against the curve of ass. "You with us?"

“Yeah, sorry. I zoned out. Are you ready?”

“Jeez Kase, I leave you with her for two minutes and she’s already bored. Step it up, lover boy,” Alex laughed, both him and Natalie squealing as Kasey sat up to smack Alex in the arm.

“Alex,” Natalie huffed.

“Sorry, sweetheart,” Alex appeased her. “Here, I think this will be easiest if you sit up,” he suggested helping her into a more upright position and taking the spot behind her. “Yeah, like that. And then Kasey can go from this way,” he waved a hand that was vaguely instructional, waiting for a confirmatory nod from Kasey. “ That good, Nat?”

“I’m good,” Natalie affirmed and Alex pushed into her slowly, both of them groaning as she stretched around him. Natalie leaned back into his chest, his arms strong around her waist. She tilted her head back so he could capture her lips in a sloppy kiss, the short thrusts of hips drawing breathy moans from the both. Neither of them seemed to care when their teeth clashed, both of them too eager to be as close as possible. There wasn’t really enough room on the sofa for the three of them, their bodies slotting together at the most awkward angles, yet they made it work.

“One more, Kase,” Alex uttered. She could feel him squeezing his eyes shut against her neck, his breath coming in breathy pants each time she squeezed around him. Kasey obliged, adding a third finger with his next thrust. Between the two of them, Natalie felt full already, but she wanted more. Kasey was dragging his thumb lazily around her clit in a way that made Natalie’s toes curl, never quite where she needed it, just playing along the brink of something spectacular.

“Kase!” Sometimes Natalie enjoyed the slow dance, being teased until she felt like she was going to explode. Today, however, was not one of those days. She wanted Kasey in her, now.

“I hear you loud and clear, love,” Kasey hummed. “What does the boss man think?”

“The boss man? Is that me? Oh, I like that,” Alex said. The low grumble Natalie gave was almost inaudible. Still, Alex must have felt it because he chuckled, brushing his lips over shoulder blade. “Yeah, I think you better get on with it.”

“Holy shit,” Alex groaned, his fingers squeezing hard into the soft flesh around Natalie’s hips when Kasey sunk into her. “That is incredible.” At first the movements were awkward, but eventually they found a rhythm, Alex slipping out as Kasey pushed forward. Low whimpers fell from her lips with each thrust.

“Are you okay?” Kasey squeezed Natalie’s knee, the act managing to maintain a gentleness to it despite everything else.

“It’s a lot, but it’s good,” Natalie nodded jerkily. She grasped at the limbs around her, trying to gain purchase on the sweat slicked bodies. Her own body felt charged, brimming with electricity as they rocked together. Kasey shifted slightly and if Natalie thought it had been good before, it was nothing compared to this. "Oh my God, don't move. Please don't move."

"There you go, baby." Kasey pulled her closer, his hands firm on her hips, letting her rut against him. Behind her, she could tell Alex was getting close, his babbled exclamations becoming more and more incoherent. She knew the words coming out her own mouth were similarly incomprehensible. It was as if she could feel every inch of Alex’s hastening movements in every muscle. It was simultaneously too much and not enough.

Natalie was pretty sure Alex finished first, the warmth of his come seeping through the thin latex. She didn’t get to enjoy the sensation for long, falling into her own orgasm soon after. She does remember Kasey dragging her hips forwards to fuck her through it, tipping himself over the edge too.

“I’m down for doing that again sometime if you two are?” Natalie hummed once their heart rates had settled to something more like normal. She was sandwiched between Kasey and Alex. Now that the endorphins had started to wane, it was becoming rather uncomfortable, the three of them squeezed onto the small sofa. “Maybe somewhere more convenient next time.”

“Sure,” Kasey replied, his words laced with tiredness and a yawn escaping.

“Don’t you dare fall asleep, Winter. You promised we could watch Black Widow tonight,” Alex sat up, poking Kasey in his side. “Come on, it’s not even late.”

“I’m not gonna fall asleep,” Kasey blinked, once, twice, three times, before giving a heavy sigh.

“Nope, everybody up. Up. Shower time,” Alex clapped his hands together.

“See what happens when you let him take charge, Nat. It goes to his head. Look what you’ve created.” Kasey groaned, rubbing the heel of hand into his eyes. He did sit up though, pulling Natalie with him and she resigned herself to the fact they were moving.

“I want popcorn,” Natalie said, her mouth already watering at the thought of freshly popped kernels.

“Yes, good shout,” Alex agreed. “I think we still have pasta left over from last night too.”

It took a while, but eventually the three of them piled back onto the sofa, steaming bowls of popcorn decorated with pretzels and chocolate sauce on their laps. Natalie ran her thumb over the corner of Alex’s lips wiping away remnants of tomato sauce; the pasta hadn’t made it out of the kitchen. She leaned forward to grab the remote, Alex immediately taking the opportunity to feign throwing a piece of popcorn at Kasey.

“Nuh uh, if you’re going to start playing catch then I’m having the first attempt at catching. You two get all competitive and then I never get a turn,” Natalie reprimanded jokingly, already shifting her bowl to the coffee table so she wouldn’t lose it all.

“Okay, whoever catches the least out of ten has to make breakfast in the morning?” Alex agreed.

“Game on.” As Natalie opened her mouth to make her first catch, she felt a wet finger dip into her ear and the popcorn sailed past her into Kasey’s lap. He picked it up and dropped it into his mouth as a smug smirk. “No!” she protested with a laugh. “That’s cheating. That one doesn’t count.”

Kasey raised his hands in surrender, his own laugh bubbling in his chest. “Alright, alright. I’ll play fair, I promise.”

#18+ #o'darwin #sweater weather #lumosinlove #kasey winter #alex o'hara #natalie darcy #cw: food #cw:sex

[caws5749]

Dazed and Confused, pt. 24-The Quarantine Series

A/N: I’m sorry that there wasn’t a part yesterday or the day before. I think today, we could all use some just fluffy team stuff.

Promoting: Ig my discord haha. And also fanfic night is wednesday! Send in some fic recs or write your own for it! (nat x reader only)

The Quarantine Series Masterlist

A few weeks had passed, and you were quickly gaining control of your newfound abilities. You were better at separating them from your emotions, and were discovering all that you could do.

The entire team was ridiculously proud of you, encouraging you and making sure you were alright, Natasha especially. Honestly, if it wasn’t for her, you’d probably be back in the med bay, severely dehydrated and overworked.

There was a mission coming up, and you couldn’t wait to actually try and help out by using your powers. You were incredibly nervous, of course, but excited to prove yourself. For now, though, it was movie night with the team, and you were just going to try and relax.

“Okay, maybe share the popcorn,” you teased, taking the bowl from Clint and plopping down on the couch in the middle of him and Nat. As soon as you’d sat down, her arm was around you, pulling you closer to her. You planted a kiss to the tip of her nose before focusing on the popcorn you now had. 

“Don’t eat it all, heathens, the movie hasn’t even started,” Tony said, rolling his eyes. 

“We can always make more,” Natasha shrugged, having seen your pout. 

“We are definitely going to need to make more,” Steve added, sitting down on one of the other chairs nearby. 

“Yeah, especially since mine was stolen,” Clint grumbled, getting up from the couch and heading towards the kitchen. You rolled your eyes and smirked, munching on some of the popcorn. 

“Want some, baby?” You murmured, turning your attention to Natasha. She shook her head. 

“I’ll wait until the movie starts.”

“Like a normal person,” Tony muttered. 

“What are you talking about, Tony? Everyone always eats all their snacks before the movie starts, that’s normal.”

“Heathens.”

You laughed, pulling the blanket more snugly around you and Nat. 

“Hands above the blanket at all times, you two,” Tony instructed as he narrowed his eyes. You rolled your eyes once more while Natasha sent him a glare. 

“So when can we start the movie?” Steve asked, tired of the antics. 

“Steve! We have to wait for Thor, Bruce, and Clint,” Natasha answered, chuckling slightly at the old man’s impatience. 

“When we say 7, we mean 7,” he grumbled under his breath. You just shook your head and ate another bite of popcorn. 

“Where are Bruce and Thor?” You wondered. 

“I think Bruce is still in the lab,” Tony answered. 

“You didn’t bring him with you when you headed this way?” Nat asked him. He shook his head. 

“Go get him, Tony, he probably forgot,” Steve offered. Tony sighed, but got up and went in search of Bruce. 

“How much do you want to bet that the movie doesn’t start for another hour?” Nat whispered to you. You giggled. 

“What are you two laughing about now?” Clint asked upon reentry. 

“Nothing,” you shrugged. Steve sent a pointed look your way and you silently scolded him with your eyes. Sometimes, you forgot he had super hearing. 

“I’ll go find Thor,” Clint said, bored of sitting already. He got up and left. 

“And then there were three,” Natasha commented, rubbing your back. You groaned, letting your head fall back onto the top of the couch. 

“We’re literally never going to get this movie started.”

And then footsteps were heard coming down the hallway at an alarming speed, and you all watched as Thor barreled into the room. 

“I’m sorry I’m late, but I’m ready. Shall we start?” He asked. 

“We’re waiting for everyone else. Clint went to go find you and Tony went to get Bruce,” Steve answered. Thor nodded, taking a seat. 

“Isn’t someone going to tell Clint that Thor is here?” You asked. They all shook their heads. 

“Fair enough,” you replied. You took a sip from your water, which was nearly empty. 

“I’ll go get you more water,” Nat murmured, already standing up and grabbing your bottle. You thanked her quietly, a blush appearing on your cheeks. She’d been like this ever since everyone had learned that hydration and your powers were so linked. Sometimes it felt like you were nearly going to drown inside from how much water you drank, but you knew it was important, and Natasha was so protective and worried about you all the time that you had to stay hydrated. 

Thor pulled you from your thoughts as he announced he was going to the restroom.

“You know, I don’t say it often enough, but you guys are really cute together,” Steve observed, causing your blush to deepen. 

“Thanks, Steve,” you replied quietly. 

“I mean it, Y/N. You guys... you got something special.”

You nodded, feeling your heart swell in your chest. You knew it was special. You knew Natasha Romanoff was the most amazing person you’d ever met. 

“I know,” you finally whispered, tears nearly in your eyes thinking about how much you loved her. 

“What did I miss?” Nat chuckled, walking back in and seeing the look on both your and Steve’s faces. 

“I’m going to go look for Tony and Bruce,” Steve announced, leaving the room. Whether he’d done it to give you two a second of alone time, or because he truly wanted to find the guys, you were grateful for it. 

“I love you,” you murmured as Natasha sat back down, pulling the blanket back over her lap and setting your water bottle down. 

“I just got you water, Y/N, but I love you too.” 

You laughed, shaking your head. 

“No, I mean, thank you for the water, but, Steve just said some nice things about us, and I just, I love you.” “I know, I love you too,” Nat whispered, pulling you in for a sweet kiss. 

“We’re never starting this movie,” you whispered against her lips. 

“Are you saying we should just accept that and get out of here?” She asked, leaning in for another kiss. You moaned when her tongue slid along your lower lip, asking for entrance to your mouth. 

“Natasha,” you whispered, pulling away. God, you wanted more of her, but it was team movie night, and you were going to make sure that you tried your hardest to get the team to watch a movie. 

“If we don’t start by 8, we can leave,” you suggested. Nat nodded, giving your cheek a swift kiss before Tony walked into the room with Bruce. 

“Where’s Steve?” Natasha asked them. 

“Steve? Why would we know?” Bruce asked. 

“He went to go find you,” you answered. 

“Oh, dear god, we’re supposed to be the Avengers, what are we doing?” Tony asked aloud, face-palming. “I’m going to get him.” 

You sighed, looking around the room. Clint and Steve still hadn’t returned, Tony had just left once again, and Thor was not back from his restroom break. 

“Yeah, we’re never starting this movie,” Bruce chuckled. You nodded. 

“Alright, come on, baby,” you sighed, standing up and reaching out your hand for Natasha. She raised an eyebrow at you. 

“We’re never starting this movie. Let’s go watch something ourselves.” 

#natasha romanoff x reader #Natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x femreader #natasha romanov x reader #black widow x reader #mine #dazed and confused #the quarantine series #natasha romanoff imagine #avengers x reader #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x platonic!reader

[thethirdwheel404]

Med Rewatch Series (#5)

S3 e3: Trust Your Gut. From what I remember this is a big one. I just remember this episode title honestly but we’ll see what happens.

-look at that! ava’s just casually in this scene, minding her own business, doing her job! you would never guess that this is a character who would later have a psychotic break and commit suicide.

-that’s really the point i’m trying to make. I hate all those posts where they’re like ‘i hated ava before, but season 4 has finally shown her true colors’ like not even?? no??? we’re trying to prove that that was never even a thing. i want to eliminate the possibility of s4 happening from your minds. nothing from s3 should ever be used as foreshadowing. that’s what the rewrite is about, ava being a good character. ava was never going to commit suicide. she was never gonna go psychotic. that should be ingrained in everyone’s minds.

-anyways, back to the episode.

-connor takes everything like a personal attack. relax

- i never realized how fun stoll was. like obviously not in the story but as a character he’s hilarious. unattached by everyone else’s drama

-awww. this maggie interaction is amazing. tapping sarah on the shoulder (neck actually but whatever) just to say hi. adorable. and sarah is already super jumpy. come on. her anxiety is already setting in. they really gave sarah two huge storylines in the same season.

-maggie... no one else would ever slash sarah’s tires. i mean honestly

-WHY DOES CONNOR HAVE TO CONTROL OF EVERYTHING - honestly ava was just reading off the chart and he can’t even let her do that he has to take over just to say the same things.

-and the way ava just takes it with her smug smile

-she is such a strong character there is no reason she would have gone crazy over connor she literally needs nothing from him.he has not ever had anything that she needed. 

- SHE’S JUST ROLLING HER EYES, SMIRKING, AND SHAKING HER HEAD AT THIS INSECURE MAN ava I love you.

-okay there’s no way i can explain it but after rolling her eyes at connor Ava turns and looks at the patient and instantly her face changes and you can see such pure concern in her eyes?? s4 ava could never (can someone please rb with a picture of what i’m talking about? it’s uncanny and so so sincere.)

- she’s in control of her emotions. she cares so much for her patients so don’t even try to play that card. the only thing connor has done literally since she got here is get in her way.

-AND CONNOR LOOKS AT HER WITH SUCH DISTRUST AND CONTEMPT. TELL ME HOW. this is insane. exasperating.

-and the way she smiles and comforts the patient. i mean come on. she’s just so amazing. AND COMFORTING. if ava really was as heartless as people say, she wouldn’t take the effort to do that. connor didn’t even do that, he just scowls at ava.

-which just proves my point, ava is only ever mean to people who she thinks deserve it. and, the more that I think about it, she’s never really actually mean. sure, she’s blunt and rude, but never cutting. she’s nice to her patients (and I know what you’re going to say, it’s not because she has to be. she’s a doctor, she still wants to help people). but when her patients are dicks, she’s not nice to them. she’s as snarky with as she’s professionally allowed to be.

-like, take this guy. he seems nice enough. he’s funny, polite, comes across charming, so ava is nice and is polite back to him.

-let’s move on.

-why is connor always so suspicious of ava. come on. he’s the one who should be sus. she literally said ‘Don’t worry, Ray, we’ll take good care of you’ and he’s giving her this weird side eye.

-ethan and will being in this board meeting is really adorable to me. like, just, bros.

-oh godddd sarah please relax. sweetie. please.

-sarah fucking tranqed him oh my god

-oh my god noah asking people for help literally shut the fuck up

-straight people are gross. not to hate but how does anyone sit through manstead

-connor literally needs to chill. I know this bit (they’re arguing over menial things in surgery) plays more to them just picking on each other, pulling each other’s pigtails on the playground if you will (i didn’t like that analogy but I used it anyway), but if you look at it, ava was only trying to help connor (suggesting a wider possible target and an easier to handle stitch) and connor took it wayyy to personally. sure the second bit of advise is just poking at him, but she suggested a better spot on the base and he shut her down without any thought.

-and then latham points out that there is no point in arguing, to which ava defers, then connor snidely says ‘Thank you, Doctor, Now, how about from here on out we keep the background noise to a minimum’ and ava just shakes her head, scoffing.

-at this point ava just likes annoying connor because its fun. it’s entertaining. he gets so upset. everyone’s done that, just be annoying for fun (its bad to say but i mean come on everyones done it)

-another point, ava immediately deferring to latham might read to some as her being a suck up but that’s not what it is.

-ava really likes seeing how close to the line she can get. she goes right up to it, but she never crosses it. the same is true with her interactions with other people outside of surgery.

-I really like this story of the girl who passed out and hit her head, and her brother’s a wreck, and her parents obviously think the brother’s a disappointment. and it was finals week so of course she wasn’t taking care of herself. and the brother knew that, and you can tell he cares so much and feels so bad. it’s nice

-complication on the surgery they were working on. ava comes in with a solution (off of connor’s mistake during surgery after not following her advice) but I have a sneaking suspicion that by the end connor will be back on top

-the effort it took connor to say ‘it’s a good idea’ come on man just fucking let it go

-i’m glad we’ve all agreed that connor’s just a dick

-aw look at that she even held the door for him. connor would never

-i don’t want to overly push the ‘med is sexist’ thing but how is it that in a storyline between nat and ethan, characters who have never been romantically involved, they still pull the woman thinks one thing, man refuses to believe it and is right dynamic. i mean come on med seriously. what the fuck is wrong with you.

-the look of annoyance and disbelief on ava’s face that connor hadn’t actually messed up. comedic, but also i get your pain.

-glad that latham sides with ava, ava advocating for a riskier procedure so they could ensure the blockage is removed)

-(something could be said about ava’s high-risk, high-reward ideals. you could even draw the parallel to events in s4 and s5, even though I really don’t want to. it’s an interesting and notable character trait to say the least)

-YOOOO I FORGOT HOW METAL THE PSYCH STORY GETS

-dude straight up cuts his abdomen open and his intestines spill out

-the fear and shock and emotion on sarah’s face make me feel so bad for her

-WAIT IS THIS THE EPISODE WHERE SHE LOSES THE END OF THE INSTRUMENT? IS THAT WHAT THIS IS? i am not prepared to watch an ava bekker breakdown rn.

-the shock on ava’s face when connor said nice job.

-ava actually tried to apologize to connor. well, not apologize but she feels a little bit bad for just how abrasive she’s been to connor. (connor didn’t necessarily have to make it super competitive). Ava said “Look, I know i have the tendency to step on toes. it’s nothing personal”

-and now they’re not arguing and are this close to actually working like a team

-and i cannot believe connor’s big one-liner is ‘Murphy’s law’

-the emotion on april’s face when the girl’s parents won’t even let her brother grieve for her. I feel it. astounding. its so painful omg

-ava: “your optimism is enchanting.” when i was writing earlier I was worried I wasn’t being accurate with her dialogue and making it sound too overly formal but i guess I nailed it. also, this line reinforces how much I love her (so does every other line)

-connor just refusing to give ava anything, no credit, no nothing. doesn’t even give her credit for earning the surgery saying “you may have elbowed your way onto the case, but he is still my patient” (I JUST TRANSITIONED INTO A QUOTE SO SMOOTHLY WHY CANT I DO THAT IN MY LANG RHETORICAL ANALYSIS ESSAYS YOU’RE KIDDING)

-hey it’s joey!

- i can appreciate him so much more when he’s not chasing after reese

-do you remember their first meeting? bickering over who gets the last splenda? (real meet cute amirite)

-dr. charles remarking how all the scientific advances can’t beat human instinct, nice little tie in to the episode title

-ava just smiling while connor waits for her to apologize. she. takes. no. shit.

-i literally hate connor’s face so much. it fucking looks predatory like stop looking at her like that. it’s almost like you were planning her psychotic break

-ava’s cunning, saying ‘we’ instead of ‘i’ when talking about the decisions being made. she’s smart. she knows what to do. She knows how to present herself. (and yeah, a little hypocritical that she said to connor ‘when you fail, I will make sure that it is noted that it was your fault and not mine,’ but like I said, she just knows how to present herself)

-latham: “Dr. Bekker seems to enjoy this discordance.”

-rhodes’ face when changing his mind and saying ‘maybe I do’ when asked if he enjoyed it too - he literally makes the dumbest faces. please. stop. (is it a straight people thing?)

Alright. Another episode down. 17 to go. This was actually a pretty good episode all around. Ava took none of connor’s shit and you’d have to squint to find any sort of romantic subtext in their interactions, which is huge win in my book. reese’s storyline wasn’t too bad, she didn’t go through too much trauma, which, the bar for watching med is incredibly low i guess. This was a really good episode for ava. like I said before, very little romantic subtext, and she had a redeeming quality in the way she obviously cared for her patient at the beginning of the episode.

The main point is something I’ve been reiterating again and again. Ava cares about her patients. Ava is mean to connor because she knows someone needs to put him in his place, and she is glad that it is her.

All in all, this was a pretty good Ava episode. Very happy.

thanks for sticking with it.

-

read the rest here:

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10 / Part 11 / Part 12 / Extra

#chicago med #med rewatch series #mine #trust your gut

[thefifthtm]

WE REACHED A BIG ONE LAST WEEK AND, HONESTLY, WORDS FAIL ME RIGHT NOW.

It took me a period of several YEARS for me to reach this milestone with my Edward Nygma/Riddler blog, so to have OVER FIVE HUNDRED of you following Five in such a short space of time is just overwhelming and, truly, I don’t know what to say - except THANK YOU!

Each and every single one of you who click that follow button, read my writing and interact with Five in your own way are loved, valued and appreciated here, BAR NONE. Spending these last few months with you all has been an absolute blessing, and as someone who is still fairly new to the Doctor Who RPC here, I just want to express how grateful I am to you all for allowing me the chance to mingle and set my own little mark. I just hope I do Fivey justice in your eyes.

With this in mind, I’m going to take a moment, as usual, to offer a few words of love and encouragement to a number of you who truly make this place what it is. If I have missed you, PLEASE, do not assume that you are being ignored. I just have so many people to thank and I’ve spent hours on this post as it is.

Under the cut, naturally!

@conn-ar - Connar! One of my longest roleplay partners! I can never do one of these without mentioning you! You have been a constant source of support throughout my roleplaying career and this blog would not exist without you. Thank you so much!

@cristinatheincredible - Another mun who wrote with my Edward and Riddler. We’ve been o each other’s dashes for years and, while we may seldom write together anymore, I always think of you whenever I think of my humble beginnings. Thank you for remaining here through all these years. Let’s get Five and Cristina together more often!

@master-koschei - Where to start? You helped me settle in and have provided me with so much while I’ve been here. This blog would be an absolute mess without you. Thank you so much for your support!

@noteveryonedies - Five’s River, and someone else that has been with me since more or less the very beginning. Five needs a strong, resilient woman to keep him in place, and River is just the ticket. Thank you for sticking by me and being just an absolute joy to write with!

@governmentofficial - Harry! A legend and my go-to for all the Doctor Who goss, and someone that has helped to make me feel so welcome in this area of the RPC. I’m still very much a newcomer but you make me feel as if I’ve been here for years. It was a pleasure and an honour to meet you at Science of the Time Lords, and I hope Mycroft is willing to keep Five in line whenever the occasion calls for it.

@baptizedbyfires - WE LOVE KAT AND JAMES! We talk every single day and James has become a crucial part of Five’s existence. Thank you both for brightening both Five’s and my own existence with your presence and awesomeness, and here’s to us being intertwined for such a long time to come!

@lefaemun - Lefae is a legend to this community and I love them. That is all. Thank you.

@therapardalis - Five would be nothing without this leading lady. He will annoy her down to the ground but he considers her a solid friend regardless, and he knows that she’ll be there for him in a crisis. Thank you so much for bringing joy and humour to Five’s life!

@the-twohearted-dalek and @koscheis-bitch - I don't need to tell you how much Five and I love you. You both bring so much crack to this part of the RPC, it just would not be the same without you here. Keep on being awesome <3

@timemilitant - #OURGENERAL. We might not write together as much as we used to but Five will always be here for his General as and when he needs him. We love you both so much!

@krazy-rp-hatter - Honestly, I wasn’t sure if Five and Rose would click together, but they HONESTLY DO, and I am LIVING for their interactions. Here’s to seeing where they go from here, and thank you for being a constant source of love and support. We love you!

@alreadybrcken - I LOVE YOUR TOMMY SO MUCH. LIKE. GENUINELY. HE IS INCREDIBLE. I’m so looking forward to him and Five travelling together, and I love the fact that we talk on Discord so much too! 

@burnedpower - Nat! We ave truly bonded since the Discord server was created. Thank you for allowing me co-ownership and for introducting something that has become such an amazing part of my day-to-day life. While I’m at it, I’ll bring in everyone else who writes with me in the server: @oldshipmate, @auroradicit, @delgado-master, @drapetxmaniia, @hearsdrums, @ofnegotiatcr, @bravedstars, @timelordcurse, @drummingncise, @themanwhoforgets, @nahthekidlived, @shipwhisperer, @musecontract, @ofwanderingsouls, @sclfmastery, @rainbcwhearts, @thesidecompanion, @capaciityforpain, @itsjustkind, @deathxproof, @harknesstm, @xtimelxrd, @dxttore, @properlydeath and anyone else whom I might have missed! THANK YOU ALL FOR JUST BEING LEGENDARY AND ICONIC IN YOUR OWN RIGHTS!

Right, and now I’m going to dump the URLs of everyone else that has just been a major part of this blog, for which I am so grateful:

@thehxghlander, @soulstcne, @londonx1965, @thirtnth, @the-11-doctor @ofheroesandscholars, @mackfclls, @marblecarved, @brassandblue, @yougotaminute, @elisethetraveller, @starnamedlyra, @ccmplicatedweb, @haiilsabrina, @cosmoshearted, @sanguinibus,m @thorneinyoursidex, @brxssknuckld, @timerogued, @twelvetm, @youmoveon, @judaskisse @colpapabear, @mangledmenagerie, @mainplotters, @mtchstck, @mysticandskepticmuses, @cruciatustm, @crowleyisms, @ineffablefallen, @wellplighted, @thesunsingsforthem, @theednygma, @imperialkingpin, @imbicilite, @heartonanoose, @lilyintheashes, @aquestionthatsneverbeenposed, @magiciitself, @escapedartgeek, @sugardxdddy, @ofrxvia, @applesdrowned, @outlawiism

AND TO ALL OF YOU, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS! I LOVE YOU ALL TO THE MOON AND BACK!

#☆𝕆𝕌𝕋 𝕆𝔽 𝕋ℍ𝔼 ℂ𝕆𝕊𝕄𝕆𝕊☆ #follower milstone #I mean it whenever I do one of these posts #I love you all and tysm for just being here and supporting me

[donttellthemangosiwashere]

Guess who watched Frozen2 yesterday and is back on her AU Juice

ok get this, using thomas’s rewrite for Frozen 1 but also 

you know that theory where Hans is like,,,, a chill dude, and the rock trolls are the evil ones and mind-controlled him into fuckin shit up so Christof would become king? also that

Spoilers for Frozen 2 so,,,, be wary

Virgil is Elsa 

Paranoid shut-in, afraid of scary ice powers, convinced himself he’s perfectly comfortable with being alone forever. Distrusts Dee immediately because he can sense the presence of magic in him, but he doesn’t know that’s what it is at first

Patton is Ana 

Emotionally volatile, quick to trust/immediately assumes the best in people, bit of a hopeless romantic

Roman is Christof 

Agrees to help Patton because “ur a prince, I cant let you do this alone it’s not noble of me to leave u hanging like that”

Remus is Roman’s funky twin brother who would rather just continue being a rock troll honestly

Kinda functions as Sven/Olaf/comic relief buddy character but they also DO have an Olaf and a reindeer steed to pull the wagon. He's hanging out with Patton and Roman during most of the movie

Deceit is Hans

Actually a prince from another country who’s like an ok dude and does grow fond of Patton immediately after meeting him, not evil until later

Logan is the head guard/politician guy with the big nose that was their advisor/guardian after their parents died, you know the guy

He's gonna be much more important in the story. He mostly tails Dee and slowly figures out that there’s something weird about him towards the end, and tries to protect Virgil and Patton from him. He cares about them so much, but he’s bad with emotions, so he’s not great at helping Patton with his loneliness or helping Virgil with his anxiety. Even when the rest of the kingdom starts to turn against them, he never doubts that Virgil is good

Character Thomas is Olaf because that’s cute as hell

He’s an embodiment of Virgil’s love for and protectiveness over Patton, but the longer he exists, the more he starts to develop his own personality and traits based on who he spends time with? So eventually Logan, Roman, Remus, Deceit, and Patton all become a part of him too, and he’s their little amalgamation snow son

(plot stuff under the cut. be warned, i put waaaay too much goddamn thought into this)

Ok so most of the first movie happens as normal. Thomas is just a lovable little anxious snow boy who walks around and dotes over and protects Patton, Reindeer is just a regular animal, Virgil runs away after a freakout, Patton goes to find him, etc etc etc

But when Hans is on the road in the first movie (when him and some soldiers have just captured Virgil from his ice castle and are marching back to the kingdom) their caravan is jumped by the rock trolls. Virgil doesn’t know whats going on cause he’s trapped in a carriage with no windows, but the rock trolls lure Dee away and then do the evil magic thing, they puppet him from then on to imprison Virgil and refuse to kiss Patton.

Roman and Remus drop Patton off and return to the woods, right? Roman’s being all reluctant about it, and Remus is like “im sure he still wants to be ur friend bro, it doesnt matter that he’s a prince and we’re common, you KNOW he doesnt care about all that” but Roman is not convinced, says he’ll ‘think about it’. They return to the rock trolls, and Remus sees the shaman in the process of puppeting Dee, in the “if only there was someone who loved you” scene where Patton is clearly dying. Remus runs to tell Roman what’s really happening, and they get caught. Roman stays behind to fight off the other rock trolls, buying Roman time to race towards the castle and save the brothers

The “if only there was someone who loved you” scene is different, tho. First of all, Dee doesn’t say that. He (and the shaman) are too smart to give up the bit until they are SURE they’ve won. Dee refuses to kiss Patton, but in like a soft way. (Got this scene from my friend Nat on discord, one of the reasons i made this au at all, its fucking KILLER) It’s more like a 

“i mean yes im fond of you but I don’t love you??? We just met” “but you proposed!” “We’re princes, looking for love in marriage is an idea I abandoned a long time ago. I figured I could at least make you happy, and an alliance between our kingdoms would be favorable.” “Oh...” “I could see myself falling in love with you, Patton, i mean that. But right now... If I could break the curse, I would. I’m deeply sorry.... Is there anything I can do to keep you warm?“ “No, there’s nothing...” “How dare your bother turn his magic against you? First he freezes the kingdom, then that golem, then he curses his own brother? (he does a whole schpeil where he convinces an emotionally broken and shellshocked Patton that Virgil is actually like evil and bad) ...Sit here, I will get you some blankets.” (Again, quote @glorifiedpigeon! She wrote a whole scene like this with Dee as Hans and Roman as Elsa, its bonkers as hell!! So good!)

While he’s gone “getting blankets” (Dee’s really just gonna leave him to freeze) Thomas sneaks in, and starts up a fire. Patton tells him not to do that cause he’ll melt, and he’s like “some people are worth melting for.” Thomas can tell Patton he’s upset and they talk about Virgil and how Patton doesn’t know what to think anymore. Thomas melts while keeping the fire warm for Patton, his sacrifice breaks the cold-poison-curse-thing and Patton is saved. The conversation Patton has with Thomas while he’s dying is weirdly familiar, and Patton realizes that it’s a 1 to 1 of a conversation him and Virgil had when they found out there parents died, when Virgil promised to “protect you no matter what, i love you.” Patton realizes Thomas was just a representation of Virgil’s brotherly love for him, which is cute as fuck, and then he goes to save his brother.

Virgil is visited by Logan, who busts him out of his cell, telling him he never doubted him for a second, but he’s wary of Dee. They run away together, panning to go out and find Patton and finally talk everything out. Dee reaches them, and calls Logan a traitor to the crown for helping Virgil escape, insisting that the fact that they are running away proves Virgil’s guilt. Logan tells Virgil to stay calm and keep a hold on his powers, and goes to confront Dee alone. Dee twists Logan’s words and just makes them sound more suspicious, eventually whacking Logan with the handle of his sword and knocking him out. Virgil is enraged, and attacks Dee. He almost kills him, but then Roman arrives, and stops Virgil from landing a killing blow. He’s about to explain what’s happening, and that Dee can still be saved and it’s not his fault, but Dee (with the rock troll magic being channeled through him) Silences Roman with a spell, so he cant speak. 

At the moment, Virgil is scared, distressed, and kinda cornered since he refuses to leave Logan’s unconscious body, and Virgil has no reason to trust Roman. All Roman knows about Virgil is that he’s wicked powerful and volatile, and he knows he can’t let Hans kill Virgil. This leads to the three of them all fighting each other 1v1v1, Hans trying to kill Roman and Virgil, Virgil trying to fend off Hans and Roman, and Roman trying to keep ether of the other two from killing each other while protecting himself.

Patton finally reaches them, and sees Roman knocked out and trapped in ice, incapacitated by Virgil, and Virgil is doin some ice magic at Dee, about to kill him, or at least wound him, to escape. Patton protects Dee, and is like “Yo no wait Virgil, you both have the wrong idea! He’s just scared of you, he’s not bad!” And Roman really wants to say “He IS bad but not in the way you think!”, but he’s still silenced. Virgil’s like “uh yeah he IS bad, look at what he did to Logan!” 

Finally, Remus catches up. He runs in from behind Dee and Patton, so they don’t see him approach until he yells to them about the trolls and whats actually going on. While they’re all distracted, Dee attacks Patton, holding him at knife-point and using him as a hostage to get Virgil to stop with the magics.

How is this fight resolved? Fuck if I know, I kinda wrote myself into a corner lmao. They are somehow able to incapacitate/trick dee, and Virgil uses his magic to override the trolls and free him from the mind-control.

And, at the end, there’s this cute little scene, after Patton is explaining everything that happened to Virgil and vice versa, where Patton’s like:

“Wait, wait! Can you resurrect Thomas??” and Virgil’s all snarky about it like “I dont know, wouldn’t that lessen the impact of his sacrifice? He’s like, a part of me, right? I think he’d like to go out all melancholy and poetic like that” “Virgil oh my goodness if you dont bring back my little snowman buddy I will cry here and now” “Okay, okay, jeez”

HERE IS WHERE THE SECOND MOVIE COMES IN

pretty much the only thing that changes is this: you know the voice thing that Elsa just starts hearing out of nowhere as a sign to fix past wrongs and whatnot? Virgil only starts hearing them now BECAUSE the rock trolls were blocking the signal from reaching him. And, Dee comes with them on this adventure and kinda redeems himself over the course of the movie by being a cool dude. And, the grampa who did the betraying was ALSO controlled by the rock trolls way back when; the rock trolls have been trying to destabilize the magic for years so that they could siphon more of it away from the spirits for their own personal use, and they got greedy once they had humans (re and ro) to work with, wanting political power as well. (Dee has been staying with them in their kingdom, as the ambassador from his country or whatever)

And for all you Shippers out there

the ships for this could be literally anything, dude. like literally any combination works, go fucking hogwild. Doesn’t even have to have a romantic ship or anything, it could just be everyone being platonic lovely babies.

#sanders sides #sanders sides au #frozen au #sanders sides frozen au #ts sanders sides #i put way too much thought into this #i might draw it i don't know

[betanyagito]

3 hours left of this decade here and I promised I’d write a sappy post so [ABBA voice] let’s go gays

Oh man. Oh boy. Was this a time. An entire 10 years spent on the internet. I’ve met people, got into new things, forgot old dreams and made new ones. How old was I when I first started here? 12? 13? It doesn’t feel real honestly. So much has happened that I still think about to this day, and as embarrassed as I am of my roots, I wouldn’t be who I am without them, and I likely wouldn’t have met the people I did if it weren’t for the early day join.mes and art streams from Deviantart and Minecraft askblogs on tumblr dot kom

I am thankful I got to know Minecraft, I got to know Hetalia, I got to know Homestuck. I am thankful these things allowed me to meet people who I couldn’t possibly imagine my life without right now. And that’s honestly the part I want to focus on. My friends

Old friends who I don’t talk to anymore, old friends who I don’t even know if are still around, old friends who still message me again and again sometime (honestly knowing that I’m still on their minds after all these years is the single most heartwarming thing ever), friends who I don’t talk with as frequently but still keep in my mind and get happy whenever we do end up meeting, and friends who are still here every day and support me endlessly.

If I were to talk about each and every one of them I would be sitting here all throughout January so I’ll try to talk about everyone in groups because I do want to take a moment to appreciate everyone. Everyone I’ve met shaped me into the person I am today, and while I am not perfect, I am happy. I am happy that I have the friends I do now

I remember the first big group of friends I’ve had when I first felt like I belonged. Kat, Wesley, Meni, Britain - those Whirled Days. I remember spending hours doing sprite edits and staying up late into the night to make sure I stayed caught up with rp and was present for the trials and murders lmao. I know it all ended on a sour note, but I will always treasure the moments we had together, and I’m so glad that after over six years I am still in touch with some of you. You were my first true out of the country friends, and you all helped me open my horizons and realize that the world is much much bigger than I had thought, and I can find friends anywhere who will love me

DR had stayed with me ever since, and I got to meet Mina, Chinch, Erika and Damien. Oh my god you guys. All my admiration for you four for being able to handle the edgefest that my writing and I was. I can’t believe we’ve lived through the peak days of DR tumblr rp. What a fucking Time that was. I would’ve never discovered my love for writing and betas without you all. You stuck with me through my worst years and always supported my dumb ideas. I remember the skypechats, the craigslist edits, the quiche, the zombie apocalypse, the adoption. I know I said I don’t want to address anyone one-on-one but Mina. Mina. If there’s anyone then you deserve a one-on-one. It’s been six (?) years. We’ve known each other for six (?!) years and we’ve seen each other go through so much. I know I tend to be really bad at communication and often fall short at replies but there’s not a day when I’m not thankful that I’ve met you and I still have you in my life. Your influence on me has been nothing but positive, you’ve taught me so much, how to love life, love my creations, how to be excited about anything. If I was half a good influence on you, I would already call that a success. I hope we will remain friends for a long time. At this point, I couldn’t imagine my life without having you in it. I just love you so much I almost teared up writing this ngl

And this one goes out to those Nanbaka SLUTS who also turned me into a slut who can never step foot into another church ever again. I can’t even recall how exactly I ended up in the discord group, but I know that you all were another milestone for me. Nick, Mew, Kristi, without you guys I would’ve never opened up towards people. I was scared back into my bubble where I just didn’t want to interact with fandoms ever again, but I you guys were one of the most accepting group of people I’ve ever met and probably ever will meet. You welcomed me with warmth and excitement and I still keep so many screenshots of the old discord chat that I read back whenever I need a good hearted laugh. Even now when our interests had changed, I’m so happy that we can still find a common note and have fun with each other. I wish nothing but the best for all of you

This brings us to the current era. All these muppet lovers......all these muppet lovers and I find so many friends.....Stella, Michael, Maple, Daco, Kris, Clover, Katie, Nette, Lili, Dani it was all Your Fault that this obsession started. I had such a fun time with all of you that now my brain cannot stop producing serotonin whenever I see a goddamn potato man. But even besides just having a common interest, you are all such wonderful people. You all helped me out of a rut and helped me shape myself, to be confident in my own opinions, to be able to stand up for myself and to have fun without worrying about what other people think. I am so grateful for every conversation we’ve had, every joke we shared, every idea we came up with together. I had no idea that a gag anime could ever get me such amazing friends, but it happened! And even if I don’t talk with some of you as often anymore, or at all, I will never forget any of you

Standing on more stable feet I was able to reach out to other parts of the fandom and start my own big project in the form of an askblog, and even if it’s stagnant now, it was one of the best decisions of my life, as I got to meet the most wonderful group of people. Nat, Athro, Buns, Turo, Jasp, JM, Lulu, Tris, Holly, Eden, Dairy, Ruri, Timey, Zako, Vivi, Ruah - you’re all just amazing. You accepted me into your group and I honestly feel like we’ve grown into a family. I’ve grown both as an artist and as a person thanks to you all, and I’ve never had such a tight knit group of friends before who’ve supported each other quite like you do. I feel loved and I know my voice is heard whenever I speak. I know that even on my worst days, you all will  be here. I know that you will hear even my most outlandish ideas, you will listen to me ramble about media you’ve never heard of and I more than gladly do the same for all of you too. I’ve never been more confident in my content and especially in my OCs. We’ve created something incredible together, and I am just so incredibly proud that I can say that I belong to MVA, that I can say that “hey thats my friend!!” whenever any of you come up, and I am so happy that I could meet all of you. I truly feel like I’ve become a much better person since meeting all of you. I sincerely hope from the bottom of my heart that we’ll be able to spend many more years together, and watch each other succeed in many more things

Despite what I intended this turned into a pretty lengthy post nevertheless whOOPS. I’m sorry if I left in any typos or anything of the sort. The bottom line of everything is- I’ve had some terrible times this decade. Really, awful times when I thought that theres no way, no way I would be able to continue on. But all these strangers online, who I’ve never even seen in person, you all were and are always there to extend a hand and help me back on my feet. There are many ways in which this decade sucked, there were many terrible news and terrible times, but, it was all worth it. If not for anything else, then for the fact that I’ve got to meet so many amazing and talented people. Thank you all for loving me and calling me a friend. I hope the next decade will treat all of us, but especially you well. You all deserve nothing but the best in your lives and I love all of you so so much

#soph sush #long post

[dckxn]

SO! I saw the sweet @rxincarnatxd‘s follower appreciation post, and I decided that since I had some artwork lying around on my iPad, that I could use it for this 80 90 (!!!) FOLLOWERS APPRECIATION POST! AND OMGOSH LET ME JUST SAY THAT THIS IS AN INCREDIBLE RESPONSE TO AN OC OF MINE! I’ve been roleplaying for a very long time myself across a variety of different places, and Howl’s only been around for a little over A MONTH and there’s already like NINETY OF YOU! I know that I’m not following like each and every one of you (and I’m honestly following a bunch of blogs at the moment!), but I really appreciate you guys none the less. I’m just super happy that you guys like this guy, and man, I’ve just had quite a few OCs, but they never quite stuck. Howl feels very different though, and he’s certainly wormed his way into my little heart and I don’t think he’ll be leaving any time soon. SO THANKS!! I’ve got some special mentions, so here we go as far as that is concerned (BUT I DO WANNA SAY IM SO BAD WITH NAMES IM SO SORRY OTL):

@xmenageriie​ ARIEEEEEEL! GOSH. WE’VE TALKED ON AND OFF. I’VE LEFT AND I’VE RETURNED AND YOU’VE STILL BEEN AROUND AND IM SO HAPPY AND GLAD FOR THAT. you are such a great person and it’s always so much fun being able to talk to you and even though we haven’t been talking recently, i’m just glad ot be able to see you on my dash as well because you have some great muses and i have a lot of love for sanji and and my zoro and your sanji will always be in my HEART FOREVER. THAT ONE TRUE PAIRING WILL NEVER DIE!!!

@mcnypieces: CAN I JUST SAY I LOVE THE PORTRAYAL OF ALL BUN’S MUSES?! BECAUSE I DO! I DO SO MUCH! We don’t talk too regular, but when I am able to hit them up for a chat, they always seem to response and are pretty much a joy to talk to. they’re so nice and i’m glad to be able to have such conversations and interactions!! IM SUPER EXCITED FOR MORE INTERACTIONS WITH BELLA!! UWU

@shrapnelsong: OH MY GOD NAT! I LOVE ALICE! I LOVE ALICE! She’s such a sweet woman who can also be stern and even scary when she needs to be! She’s got so many verses so there’s a little something for everyone and the roleplayer is always nice when I talk to them! \o/ I can’t wait to see how Alice and Howl evolve from this point on!

@rxincarnatxd: KIKI! DUUUUUUDE. I GOTTA LOT OF LOVE FOR KAGS AND I’VE ALREADY GUSHED OVER HER IN YOUR OWN APPRECIATION POST BUT I LOVE HER. SHE IS SO SWEET AND WARM AND COOL AND HOWL TOTALLY APPRECIATES HAVING HER AROUND. she is good for him. ;w;/ and you!! gaaah your name escapes me OTL but i love you sooo much! it’s so fun talking to you and talking about kags and howl and you got that sideblog that i gotta interact with. im super excited for that. xD

@hxgure: HI. I NOW KNOW AND WILL REMEMBER THAT YOUR NAME IS VEE!! omgosh! orz BUT ANYWAY. I HAVE SO MUCH LOVE FOR YOUR NIC! LIKE! HE IS AMAZING! GOD. HE’S SO GOOD AND HIS INTERACTIONS WITH HOWL ARE GREAT. THEY’RE BOTH DUMB CHILDISH OLD MEN AND I LOVE IT! I CANT WAIT TO SEE WHAT’S IN STORE FOR THEM! BUT ALSOOMGOSH VEE! TYOU ARE SO COOL! it’s always just like, chill? relaxing? to talk to you. it’s good. sometimes i just have something that i wanna say and you don’t mind me dropping off little messages to your IMs and i’m so glad for that because im definitely comfortable with ya. xD

@dracaelum-faerie: ANNA IS LOVE. ANNA IS LIFE! TUBBS IS THE UNIVERSE! TOGETHER THEY ARE FOREVER IN MY HEART! Such a interesting variety of crewmembers, but anna and tubbs claim the top spot for sure! I talk to you on discord from time to time (or in IMs) and it’s always fun! \o/

@pasttorn/akrasva: YOU! I LIKE YOU! Though we haven’t really started anything up yet, i love talking to ya when you have time and just talking and gushing over our muses and how they could potentially interact! it’s always a good time my friend and i am glad to know you.

@frosthub: I really like being able to talk to you and honestly, your muses are so cool! Infe is smooth as heck and he’s also a bit dumb and he’s a joy to talk about and interact with and I just love him!! thank you for writing him. ;w;/

@mondxs:​ YOU ARE LOVED KATT! It’s never a dull moment when i talk to you and you always seem to have something interesting or new to say. i know we’re not doing anything write now, but that doesn’t even matter. i’d follow you just to keep an eye on your threads and stuff. uwu

@nvrcmplt: I KNOW I ALREADY GUSHED ABOUT YOU TOO IN THAT POST, BUT GOSH YOU ARE SO COOL. LIKE, SERIOUSLY. IT’S LIKE .. IT’S PRETTY CHILL BUT SOMETIMES HYPE BUT IT’S GOOD. it’s fun being able to talk to you tala and i just feel blessed to be able to interact with some of your muses! i cant wait to write more with Liwanu and Motoharu. i love those boys. ;___;/

@slf-sxcrfe: IT’S SO FUN TALKING TO YOU. AND I LOVE RAY. HE’S SO... IDK. HE’S JUST GOSH. I LOVE HIS ATTITUDE?? AND ITS FUNNY WHEN SOME OF THE THINGS HOWL DOES JUST CONFUSES THE HELL OUT OF HIM. I think ray could teach howl a thing or two tbh, so i cant wait to see how they grow together and get more used to each other!!! OwO/

@gengakki: I am so proud of you. Even though things have happened, you still managed to keep your muse for Kank and I really hope and feel that things have gotten better for you and that makes me happy. im glad he’s still going strong. i love your kank and i always will and i will never NOT want to interact with him, so please throw him Howl’s way whenever you damn well want!! O/

@overoaks: HEY YOU! ALL YOUR MUSES CONTAINED INTO ONE BLOG? HELL YEAH! HELL YEAH! HELL YEAAAAAAAH!!!!!! Your Crocodile is Impressive and I LOVE YOUR LUFFY AND JESUS CHRIST PLEASE JUST LET ME LOVE JINJI! gosh ILOVE THAT MAN! HE’S WONDERFUL AND ADORABLE AND I HOPE FOR GOOD THINGS WITH HOWL AND JINJI WHATEVER THEY MAY BE. THEY ARE SO COOL TOGETHER! gosh. UWU/

Special Mentions: 

@velvety-love who was the very first person to follow me and even though we only chat a bit from time to time on tumblr, I’m glad to be able to do that when we both have time!

@hailxthexkiiing who i only really talk to from time to time on tumblr, but they’re a very cool person! c:

@despairforme we don’t talk to often at all, but BOY DO I LOVE THEIR NNOITRA!! so good!

@bucketfullofocs at some point, i hope to be able to get around to interacting with your other OCs as well. bucket is super nice and never seems to mind chatting with me which is cool ‘cause i can be a chatter box when i’m comfy with someone! 

@trafalxar JUST Thanks for always popping up to say hey! it really makes me happy. i love hearing about what’s currently going on with you and just keep being yourself.

@icycoldavatarstate is a nice roleplayer with a cool muse! she’s a hell of a woman who will continue to grow and mature and i can’t wait to see how she turns out overtime! \ouo/

THIS IS NOT EEVN THE TIP OF THE ICEBURG THOUGH! There are quite a few more of my followers that i appreciate especially if i talk to you on discord and i just want to see that i appreciate you guys as well even though you weren’t mentioned up here! DON’T FEEL BAD AT ALL. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. c:

AND TO ALL MY NEWEST FOLLOWERS THIS PAST WEEK AND LAST WEEK: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR GIVING THIS GUY OF MINE A CHANCE. ouo/

#FOLLOWER APPRECIATION POST #but you got the message now ; /psas&news #it's a little different now ; /long post #I'M ALSO SORRY THIS WAS LONG AS HELL. #I HAD TO READ MORE ouo

[marcilled]

The Xylo ARG: a summary

Have you or someone you follow been getting cryptic asks like the one above? They always just say one of the two following things:

a303d61a3714b71b459a9e65921078 OR a303d61a-371-4b71-b45-9a9e65921078

Well, good work, you’ve managed to stumble into a new tumblr ARG which I’ve taken to calling the “Xylo ARG” or “Shiloh ARG”. I’ve already talked about this on my blog already, but I thought it might be a good idea to have a post summarizing what the hell is up with these asks and what the deal with this ARG is.

The main blog and focus of this ARG is here: @xylophonetic

If you haven’t already read my previous post about this, you should check that out. It includes some speculation and theories that I didn’t include in this post, most notably my theories about this string of characters being a UUID, as well as some observations that this hex number actually corresponds to 5 unique colors encoded in hexadecimal.

Since my previous post, there’s been some developments, but sadly I and the others I’ve been discussing this with over discord haven’t come up with any major leads, or if we have, they haven’t led anywhere yet.

That being said, I thought it might be useful to make a post summarizing some of what we already know about this. I’ve never done an ARG and don’t even really know much about them, but I was one of the people sent one of these asks so in a way I’m a small part of it now. I figured I’d make this post since I think I was the first person to really analyze what was going on here and notice that there’s an actual blog associated with these asks people have been getting. Obvs a lot of these discoveries weren’t made by me tho, I’ve not devoted much time to discovering things, there’s a few others involved in trying to figure this out too. (y’all, feel free to hop in the replies/reblogs if you want people to know you’re helping with this).

Anyways, let’s get onto the actual post. This might get lengthy, so it’ll be below the cut. Heads up- this post contains creepy imagery, depictions which might be described as “body horror”, as well as mentions of parental abuse. All posts referenced should have a link provided unless they were deleted before the creation of this post. Got it? Let’s dive in.

First off, let’s recap on how this all started, and how me and a few others came to realize that this was, indeed, an ARG we’re looking at. (Presumably, anyways- all of the happenings are too strange to just be the work of some crafty aesthetic blogger… probably.)

It all started with a couple of popular tumblr users getting asks like the one linked at the top of the post here. Just this cryptic hexadecimal string, sometimes with hyphens, sometimes without. It’s unclear how many people these anonymous asks were sent to, but if you look up the text you’ll find a couple other popular tumblr users that were sent the ask. It’s always anonymous, and I don’t know of anyone who’s received direct messages from the blog owner(s).

After pondering it a bit, I decided to look up the ask I got on tumblr, and noticed a blog which had this string of characters as its url. And that’s where things started getting interesting.

The blogs

The main blog relating to this ARG appears to be https://xylophonetic.tumblr.com/. Her URL has changed a couple times since we first discovered it, the url was originally a303d61a3714b71b459a9e65921078. From now on I’ll be referring to this blog/blog owner as “Shiloh”, as that is and has been the name stated on the blog. (Also- her pronouns are she/hers as mentioned here.)

There is also another blog relating to this story, which I hadn’t mentioned in the previous post (because at the time we did not know about it / it had not been created yet). This blog originally had the url a303d61a, but has since taken the previous URL that shiloh used: https://a303d61a3714b71b459a9e65921078.tumblr.com/

This new blog was originally titled “Safe?”, and doesn’t appear to have any name associated as far as anyone can tell, so from here on I’ll be referring to them as “safe”. It’s unclear if “safe” is a character that has been mentioned by Shiloh before, but it’s certain that they are associated with the ARG because they swapped urls with shiloh. At time of writing, the “Safe?” blog has had its title changed twice, first to a series of three emojis, then to an eye emoji. We will continue to call them “Safe” until there is a more appropriate name discovered/decided on.

There is also, technically, a third blog- this blog uses the URL previously used by Safe, and it appears that this blog may just be for keeping the url hoarded. However, there’s still some interesting things on this blog, and even some possible hints. The blog is https://a303d61a.tumblr.com/ and will go unnamed unless things begin to appear on that blog as well.

Okay, now that we know a bit about how this started, and what blogs to be on the lookout for, what is there to know? Well, if you take a look at Shiloh’s blog, you might not even realize what you’re looking at is a part of an ARG at first. From first glance, it honestly just looks like an average aesthetic blog. She reblogs lots of aesthetic type posts from various bloggers, a lot of which may not mean much in the long run, but some of the posts she reblogs do give a bit of insight on some of the different “characters” in this emerging story. However, she also sometimes posts very cryptic things- many original posts contain very strange and cryptic photos or text that’s been purposefully obfuscated or otherwise altered. The same string of text “a303d61a…” is present throughout the blog’s history. There’s also other posts from Shiloh that imply that she is (or, was) in danger, or that she was sick, that she’s afraid of certain other characters, etc.

So, these “characters”… who are they? There are quite a few distinct “characters” involved in this, some seemingly more relevant than others. I’ll give a brief overview of what we know about all of them, but first, I should say what is known about the central character here: Shiloh.

Shiloh

While we don’t know a lot about Shiloh herself, there are a few things we can say for sure. Shiloh likes to reblog things she likes or thinks are interesting, much like your run of the mill aesthetic blogger. However, she also posts her own strange, cryptic photos sometimes- often times with many filters and photo manipulation used to make them look strange or hard to decipher.

Shiloh seems prone to deleting posts often, for one reason or another- or posting things then rapidly deleting them. This has been noted to happen even late into the night without much rhyme or reason. The “Safe?” blog is sometimes used to archive some of these deleted posts, although not all of the important/noteworthy posts are actually saved in this way. Shiloh has even been shown to go back and frequently edit old posts, sometimes multiple times. Her (and the other blogs’) urls, titles, icons, blog colors and headers have been known to change at random.

She also seems to not have total control over her blog/account- she’s posted before about her url or icon changing out of her control, and seeming confused or upset by it. See here. She’s also posted before about how she’s “regaining control” and such.

As well, it seems that for a time, Shiloh fell ill with some unknown ailment. Or rather, unknown to her- “they won’t tell me”. It’s unknown who “they” is in this context, but Shiloh seemed sad that she could not see Nat any longer- and also that her mother was preventing her from going out due to this illness. Notably, after posting this, she posted “im not a monster im not”. Perhaps people, possibly her mother, were telling her her illness made her monstrous??

Yesterday evening (may 16), she posted that her fever is gone and she is doing better now. Perhaps she has recovered from her illness– although she still seems confused about what is happening.

Aside from those things, she has also posted a photo here, tagged as “#me”:

(original post)

There’s a lot of uncanny images like this on her blog, and I can’t include every one of them- but this is, supposedly, Shiloh. There’s also another post in her “#me” tag, but it is simply a reblog of some art. Not sure if it is important.

Safe?

I’ve covered most of what we currently know about Shiloh herself, but there are many other “characters” at play in this story. Most of these characters we only know about based upon things Shiloh has said about them, or posts she has tagged them in. “Safe?”, on the other hand, we only know about from their blog, and how they interact with Shiloh.

Safe is a bit of a mystery right now. It’s unclear if they(?) are even one of the characters mentioned by Shiloh or not, or if they are an outsider completely. Regardless of who they are, they seem hostile towards Shiloh.

Safe’s blog was not known until two days ago (may 15th) around ~4pm. When we discovered it, our initial thought was that the blog could be unrelated to the ARG itself, and it could potentially just be somebody who was following along and taking time out to archive the posts. Shiloh is known to delete posts sometimes after all, including ones that seem pretty important.

As time would tell though, it became clear that Safe is another actor in this story, although they seem to be even more mysterious than Shiloh.

Safe seems to reblog many of Shiloh’s original posts, sometimes adding tags or even editing the post in certain ways. We have reason to suspect that Safe is a malevolent force, as they have reblogged the photo of Shiloh and tagged the picture “#it”, in spite of her specifically requesting not to be called it. They’ve also reblogged posts from her that say “cold” and tagged it “freeze”, and a post saying “warm” with the tag “burn”, as if wishing harm on Shiloh.

Nonetheless, some of the most compelling clues we’ve gotten yet have come from the Safe blog. Particularly, it was the Safe blog which posted the following:

Sadly, the post was later deleted from both blogs, and there is no web archive of it, or fullsize versions of the right and left pictures. Here’s the fullsize of the center picture, though:

This post originally came from Shiloh’s blog, although I believe the images were not in the original post– Safe seems to have a habit of editing Shiloh’s posts and adding new things.

These pictures are tantalizing because of the caption: “room 371″. If you’ll notice, 371 is a subset of the string of text tying all of this together…

a303d61a-371-4b71-b45-9a9e65921078

The significance of this is currently unknown. However, there was some speculation that Shiloh may have been hospitalized due to her illness- these images do look somewhat like a hospital. However, this conflicts with what Shiloh herself has said- she is at home. So, what is room 371? We just don’t know, at the moment.

Another series of posts from Safe that just happened today only further the mysteries surrounding them. Today, they reblogged the post in which Shiloh said her fever was gone and edited the text to make it say “SHE MADE ME SICK”. It’s unclear who “she” is, in this context- but this seems important.

Also today, safe changed their blog title from “Safe?” to a series of three emojis- a safety pin, an old key, and a dagger. This is significant because of another thing I’ll bring up later. At time of posting, they’ve changed their blog title yet again to be just an eye emoji.

Beyond the posts about room 371, and other mysterious edits and reblogs of Shiloh’s content, not much is known for sure about Safe. There are some theories that Safe is actually Shiloh’s mother, or that they are a reflection of Shiloh’s inner thoughts and feelings about herself, but for the time being these are simply theories with not enough proof to back them up yet.

Other Characters (Nat, Melody, Zach, Brian)

Now, it is time to get into the other named characters in all of this. These other characters we only know about from things that Shiloh has said, or posts that she has reblogged and tagged in their name. For some characters, we only know of them at all due to her tags.

First, let’s start with “Nat”. Nat is one of Shiloh’s best friends, and clearly someone she cares about a lot. Shiloh was very sad when she could no longer see her after falling ill. A scroll through Shiloh’s Nat tag will show a variety of posts, although there seem to be some strong connections to love, tarot, and cats. Also, sometimes, space.

Something interesting to note is that in the tags of this post, Shiloh seemed to imply that Nat also has a blog, but “she changed urls”, and Shiloh doesn’t seem to know what her url is anymore, simply saying “weird”. While this is purely speculation, it’s possible that Nat’s blog could have been tampered with, in the same way that Shiloh’s was previously (possibly by the person who runs the Safe blog?)

After Nat, we have a minor character: Melody. It’s possible they could be more important, but right now, I can’t find any posts where Shiloh directly mentions melody- we only know of melody from various posts tagged with that name. Interestingly, one of the earliest posts on the blog (and an original post, too) depicts a pair of boots and is tagged as “#melody”. There’s a slight pattern of celestial bodies and plants, but nothing too significant to comment on here.

After Melody is another minor character: Zach. Here’s Shiloh’s #zach tag. A common theme here seems to be certain mammals (an opossum and a squirrel) and two pictures of pocket knives. Recently, Shiloh has posted that zach is a friend of hers. Other than that, not much is known of Zach.

That brings us to Brian- another interesting character. Here’s Shiloh’s #brian tag. There’s a few original posts here, with some cartoon characters dancing and hugging. There’s also the same pocket knives that zach was tagged in.

On the surface there might not seem to be a lot here about Brian, but in actuality I have reason to suspect that Brian may be Shiloh’s brother. I believe our first hint at this was this post:

It would make sense that her brother would be there at her home, albeit unexpectedly. Another post that re-affirms this hunch is this now deleted post:

the tag #brother was put alongside #brian here. Also, there is this post which also mentions there being a brother:

There may be other characters, as there are a lot of tags in use on the blog. However, these 4 are the most obvious ones, having names that are… just ordinary people names.

Mother and Father

Beyond the already named characters, there’s two more distinct characters mentioned on Shiloh’s blog- “Mother” as well as “Father”. There are very few posts about Father, but a great deal about Mother. I’ll just preface this right now by saying that Shiloh’s mother seems abusive and openly hostile/aggressive towards Shiloh. As for her father, not much is known of him, but he seems to be absent from Shiloh’s life, likely due to having divorced her mother at some point in the past.

If you take a quick scroll through her #mother tag, you can see that there is a strong association with birds. This seems like a very consistent thing- perhaps Shiloh’s mother is a bird. Or maybe she just connects her with birds for some reason. Either way, if there’s bird imagery, there’s a good chance that it relates to Shiloh’s mother (although there was one bird image tagged as #brian, too).

Some of the earliest posts on the blog make references to mother in this way, too:

Another motif in the photos tagged as #mother are glowing eyes:

As discussed before, Shiloh’s mother seems abusive. Here’s some posts showing Shiloh expressing fear of her mother:

As well as some recent posts from earlier today (may 17) which tell a lot about how Shiloh feels about her mother:

(source for the last one)

It has been stated that Mother doesn’t like any of Shiloh’s friends:

It’s also been shown that Shiloh’s mother tells her she can’t go out and can’t see nat anymore due to her illness. I also speculated earlier that her mother may have been the one to call her a “monster”.

Additionally, this cryptic original post is in the #mother tag:

full tags are #fear, #heart, #love, #mother, #love love.

There’s a lot of hidden text in this image, including the mysterious hex string, as well as phrases and words such as “fear of the heart of love”, “like anything”, etc. It is a bit hard to make out, and difficult to reverse all the filters done to make the text illegible to begin with.

Adding to the series of mysteries surrounding Mother, earlier today Shiloh posted a series of pictures that appear to depict a path to a river. When asked about them, Shiloh stated that “mom doesnt like the river”, and that “she thinks its dirty or something”. Curiously, she says that her mom is scared of fish.

There have also been some theories that Mother is the one running Safe’s blog, antagonizing Shiloh when she gets the chance. There’s credence given to this theory by taking into account this post, where Shiloh talks about having her blog changed without her control over it. In the post, you can see that her icon was changed to this image:

An edited version of the full photo remains on Safe’s blog. This is a photo that was created by a neural network (source), and contains many bird-like features, so we’ve taken to calling this picture “mother bird”. The fact that Shiloh’s icon was changed to this while the blog was not under her control seems to imply that her mother was the one messing with her blog. Considering how much urls swapped between Safe and Shiloh, it seems as though there’s a link between Mother and Safe, although, again, this is speculation.

There is also this post on Safe’s blog, which depicts feathers / knives side by side, along with a caption from Shiloh saying “she’s coming”:

The post is now deleted from Shiloh’s blog. Given the feathers/bird motif here, and referring to a hostile entity as “she”, it’s probably safe to assume that Shiloh was referring to Mother.

At the very least, we can say that both Mother and Safe are openly hostile/antagonistic towards Shiloh, if not the same person.

As for “father”, there’s only a few posts referring to a father, and only recently have there been any original posts. Shiloh seems to associate him with suited businessmen, and there are many posts implying that her parents had a very testy relationship. It seems as though they divorced, and now Shiloh’s father is no longer in her life. Aside from some possible resentment possibly stemming from him not being there any longer, it’s hard to say much about Father, other than that he’s not around any longer.

Other tags

There are many tags in use on Shiloh’s blog, many of them seemingly mundane, something you’d expect from any run of the mill aesthetic blog. Still, there are a few tags which incite some intrigue, or are worth speculating about.

One such tag is #home. Shiloh makes many references to “home”- never “my house” or “where i live” or any other word- only ever referring to it as simply “home”. The images in the tag are often very lush and green depictions of nature- they could just be pictures of landscapes, or sometimes they are pictures of humble cottages in the wilderness. Sometimes they can depict houses that are rotting and decaying. All these pictures seem to signify what “home” is to Shiloh, and I think that “home” is a specific location.

To back up this theory, there’s also the tag #camp. There’s not a lot in this tag, but it seems to evoke this feeling of some summer camp or something that Shiloh went to once perhaps. Maybe “camp” could come up again in later posts? I guess we’ll see.

There’s also the tag #you, which would seem to be the opposite of the #me tag. However, there’s just some songs and other various reblogs in this tag.

Misc. observations / speculation

The new(?) blog at the url https://a303d61a.tumblr.com/ may be otherwise empty, but the blog’s title and description are somewhat curious. As of time of writing, this is the entire contents of their blog:

My device doesn’t have a new enough version of unicode to support displaying some of these emojis, but the emojis in the title are:

safety pin 🧷 old key 🗝 dagger 🗡

The emojis included in the blog’s description are:

rainbow 🌈 tooth 🦷 scissors ✂️ wilted flower 🥀

Also worth noting, is that these three emojis were briefly displayed as the title of Safe’s blog earlier today.

I get the feeling that these emojis may be a pretty significant hint. Something that reinforces this suspicion in me is the fact that Safe made a post tagging Shiloh’s blog, similar to how this new blog made a post tagging Safe. However, the post Safe made includes a safety pin emoji, which is one of the three emojis included in this blog’s title.

This is purely speculation, so feel free not to believe me, or reinterpret it how you wish of course, but: Perhaps Shiloh’s blog is like a safety pin, holding the story as we know it together. But, what we really need to find is the key. The key will lead us further, until we find the dagger.

I also find the emojis used in the description curious, because Shiloh has posted pictures of scissors (actually, lawn clippers?) before. Additionally, Safe has made a post about teeth and eyes hurting before. Interestingly, this post was edited from the original– Shiloh’s post was about her mother seeming angry, but Safe changed it to say “teeth hurt eyes hurt”.

Another potential lead that @ skippsblipps discovered, was a pattern in this old post from Shiloh.

Aside from the obvious secret message mixed in amongst the text, there seems to be a pattern of when the “a303d…” string of text repeats, and when there is something other than the original “a303d…” string. In their words:

“if we count only where the code was exactly the original code, its 6 , 1 , 2 , 1 , 4 , 2 if we count where the code deviates, its 1 , 3 , 3 , 3 , 1″

There’s a chance that this post could be absolutely random nonsense, or that we were only meant to look for the words within the text, but perhaps there’s something more here.

Closing thoughts

I said it at the start, and I’ll say it again: I don’t know a damn thing about ARGs. And, hell, after spending hours compiling stuff for this post, I’m still pretty clueless about where this one might lead. My main hope with this post was to inform anyone who’s curious about this ARG about what we’ve discovered so far, as well as to fill people in who may have missed stuff.

Also, I’d like to apologize if this post jumps topics around a lot, or if it can be a bit hard to follow. Honestly I think that’s just a result of all of the different loose ends in this ARG being hard to follow themselves, although I tried my best. I had to keep updating this post as I typed it, because new posts kept coming in and new discoveries/speculation kept happening. So, sorry for any confusion.

Sadly, many posts on both blogs end up getting deleted, and never archived. That’s why I’ve taken the liberty to archive each and every single post and tag I linked to in this breakdown on the internet archive, which is also why this took hours to make this post because I had to ctrl+c and ctrl+v like a million times. If you notice any of the links I put in this post are broken, just paste the url into the wayback machine and you should at least pull up the archive that I took at the time of typing this post. I couldn’t archive every single thing on all these blogs, just the stuff that I thought was relevant.

If anyone else is inspired to hop in on this ARG because of this post, please feel free to add your thoughts/speculation in the replies, reblogs, whatever. Also please don’t expect me to answer all your asks & speculation, I did this post because it seems like nobody else is paying attention to this and I thought it was cool and deserved some time and attention. I fully expect people smarter than me to outpace me and discover all the secrets and that’s cool with me, I’m just along for the ride. I hope my post helped. Thanks for reading!

EDIT: I’ve made an update to this post here, go read it!

#xylo ARG #shiloh ARG #a303d61a3714b71b459a9e65921078 #a303d61a 371 4b71 b45 9a9e65921078

[softbutchenergy]

kelly’s actual extended wishlist (≖ᴗ≖✿)

if any of these sound appealing to u, either like this post or slide in my messages and we can plot something out!! i rp on discord and on tumblr, and am down for about anything so -- here we gooo!

faces i want to play

nat wolff

alex wolff

camila cabello

normani kordei

hailee steinfeld

amandla stenberg 

laura harrier

eileen kelly

lily rose depp

alisha boe

shawn mendes

timothee chalamet

lily collins

kiersey clemmons

any skam fcs !!!

plots & ships i’m dying for are under the cut !!!

ships i need

camila cabello x any female fc

amandla x nick robinson

lily rose depp x timothee chalamet

eileen kelly x nick robinson

amandla x any female fc

camila x normani

camila x lauren

shawn mendes x camila cabello

shawn mendes x alisha boe

king princess x amandla 

nat wolff x anyone

alex wolff x anyone lol

josefine frida pettersen x lisa teige

henrik holm x tarjei sandvik moe

taissa farmiga x evan peters

naomi scott x bridgit mendler

madelaine petsch x camila mendes

plots ( a lot of the og posts for these are from deactivated blogs so imma just copy and paste some !! )

anything angsty that will hurt the both of us

road trips !!!

something based off i don’t smoke and i bet on losing dogs by mitski

a star is born kinda plot (but also based off chesapeke by better oblivion community center)

anything based off stuck in love

anything based off of any ship in skam, parks and rec, how i met your mother, new girl, or girls :’)

single mother/father plots <3

this small town girl who lives in a small ass town by the sea and who has basically never set foot outside the town but who loves it there bc she loves the sea more than anything else and she honestly doesn’t know a lot about the outside world but she really doesn’t seem to care and then comes in the big city boy who has spent his entire life downtown and who absolutely hates nature and who spends most of his time listening to underground music and thinking that he’s cool bc he reads obscure books but then his parents catch him partying too much and doing drugs a couple of times so they ship him off to his “crazy” aunt’s house which happens to be in the small town that the girl lives in. and at first he kind of tries himself with the girl bc he’s bored and he plans on getting out of that hole as soon as possible but  she rejects him and that’s the first time that it happens to him and he gets rlly insulted so the two of them start bickering and arguing and fighting all the time and maybe at one point that turns into some kind of romance/friendship in which the girl shows the boy to appreciate the sea and the boy shows the girl a bit of the outside world 

I NEED A PLOT WHERE MUSE A AND MUSE B HAD BEEN DATING FOR LIKE 3 YEARS AND IT WAS REALLY HELLA SERIOUS BUT ONE DAY MUSE A JUST UP AND LEAVES BECAUSE SHE GETS SCARED OF THE COMMITMENT AND ALL OF THAT AND THEN LIKE THREE MONTHS AFTER SHE BROKE UP WITH HIM IT’S POURING DOWN RAIN AND SHE SHOWS UP AT HIS DOOR STEP COMPLETELY SOAKED TO THE BONE AND SHIVERING AND SHE’S PROBABLY GOING TO GET A COLD AND SHE’S ALL “I DIDN’T KNOW WHERE ELSE TO GO” IDK ??? LIKE THIS IF YOU WANNA DO IT 

please an arranged marriage between two socilaite families/ big names in their city. but like she’s still stuck in the party stage and fucking up because she’s upset with her parents or unhappy with her life and he’s dealing with a lot of pressure and stress from his family to take over the family bussiness and it’s just two polar opposites but it could be super cute sometimes when she gets super drunk and he picks her up and hold her hair back when he throws up and stays up to give her a glass of water and make sure she sleeps well even though he has a huge meeting in the morning that he should be resting for. but also the angST and the fights and the ‘i didnt ask for this’ and making each other jealous and sexual tension

gimme a plot where … basically, muse ais this corrupted soul, always drinking too much, getting too high, they can barely function and muse b is basically their saving grace, always coming through in the middle of the night after a drunken phone call asking for a ride home. and muse b only does this because they’re agood person at heart, but they can’t deny that muse a’s actions actually disgusts them. but they’ve known each other for too long and muse b always promised they’d never let muse a down, because they know they’re the only thing that’s STABLE in their life. and this has become their routine, muse a texting/calling muse b when something goes wrong and muse b coming around to rescue them. there’s not much to their friendship beside that, these days, because muse a doesn’t really acknowledge them otherwise. andmuse b just settles with the fact that they’re being used, but they can’t bear to leave muse a alone, knowing that they probably wouldn’t survive without them … but then ONE NIGHT, when muse b is carrying muse a into bed, tucking them in like they usually do and they’re about ready to say goodnight until muse a, who is completely out of their mind intoxicated, mumbles somethingbarely audible that sounds a lot like ‘i love you.’ muse b thinks to brush it off, until muse a continues professing all these FEELINGS like ‘i really fucking love you, please, don’t leave me tonight’ and muse b is just STUCK. because muse a is so bad for them but muse b is the only good thing in their life … so they stay. 

i need a college plot. i need muse a, a shy but openly gay painter in his first year. i need muse b, a soccer star who is “definitely straight” in his third year. i need muse a to ask muse b out on a date and muse b accepts because he’s dared to by his team. its awkward and its tense because muse a is fumbling over his words and saying the wrong things. i need muse b to walk him back to his apartment and muse a kisses him and its hot and rough, completely unexpected and they have sex and its very awkward because muse b is dominant but has no idea what to do. and i need muse b to use muse a for sex because he definitely is 100% straight but muse a is a good fuck. i need muse b to start falling for muse a. i need muse b to get scared and defensive, now playing part in the bullying that the soccer team has been doing against muse a. i need muse b to just honestly be a really shitty person but muse a to love him through all of that.

okay but… give me an f/f plot where muse a is a hopeless romantic with a long term boyfriend and her best friend since childhood, muse b, is a closeted lesbian who has had a thing for muse a for as long as she can remember however, as of recently a has been pretty negligent towards b and hanging out with her boyfriend instead. so, to repay b – muse a plans out a road trip, full of cheesy pit stops, road side attractions and sketchy motels, spanning over the entire summer. being in the car with each other for that long with each other means petty little arguments about how much time a has been spending with her boyfriend and/or weird sexual tension. ++ late nights at shifty bars and motel rooms getting wine drunk = make out sessions the two pretend to forget by the next morning. lots of angst from muse a’s side since she has a boyfriend she’s been with for years and angst from muse b’s side because she has to listen to the girl she’s had feelings for forever talk about her boyfriend the entire trip…. YES!!!

#1x1 #1x1 rp #rp #indie rp #okay i took a fat ass nap earlier and dont have work tomorrow so i am about to be up all night come entertain me lets Plot

[itscooltobefanficy]

Feeling Alive- Part 3

Summary: Dance school!AU (or the Step Up/Pride and Prejudice mash up nobody asked for). Bucky Barnes is forced to take twelve hours of commercial dance classes to pass the year- and that just happens to be your regular weekly dance class.

Introduction

Part 1 (Slow Hands)

Part 2 (Stay)

There Will Come a Time

Pairing: Bucky Barnes X Reader

Chapter 4/?: There Will Come a Time

Word count: 3094

You guys. You’re just amazing. So many of you are sticking around and reading and hopefully enjoying and slkfjlaksjdf I’m just blown away. I’m aiming to finish this by the first of August! That’s doable, right? I feel like I should have mentioned this earlier, but if I were tagging this on AO3 it would be ‘SLOW BURN’. Idk how you all feel about that. But @systemfailuresunshine seems to be enjoying the pain ;) Anyway go forth and read my lovelies! (Feel free to drop me messages/asks or whatever)

The familiar, discordant chimes of your alarm shrill in your ears and you fumble for your phone without even opening your eyes.

“Shut up,” You grumble, as the smooth edges slip out of your fingertips for the third time. “Just, ugh, shush.”

Reluctantly, you crack open one eye and finally manage to stab down on the glowing screen. Silence at last. Unfortunately, you know you can’t roll over and go back to sleep: not unless you want to be late for work. You let out another heartfelt groan and force your eyes all the way open.

The screen of your phone is still lit up, showing two message notifications. You frown and swipe them open. One from your mum, asking when she can call- you quickly type out a reply suggesting this afternoon- and one from a number you don’t recognise.

Steve says that if you don’t reply by 12 we’re breaking down the door

Everything suddenly comes rushing back. Instinctively, you drop your phone on the covers and reach for the back of your head, wincing when your fingertips encounter a sizeable lump. Wriggling your shoulders merits the same reaction, and moving your legs sends a twinge through your hips. General conclusion: ouch. Still, not dead.

“Always a positive,” A dry voice rings through your memories, and you almost smile. Then you reach for your phone again.

No need to call in the cavalry, I’m up

Writing it out is kind of a contractual obligation; you hit send, then struggle out from underneath the duvet and drag yourself into the bathroom.

Thankfully, the warmth of the shower spray (unpredictable and wavering as it is) helps soothe your angry muscles, and you dress feeling fairly awake. Then you have to dash out of the bathroom to silence the second alarm that you always set, intended to either jerk you out of a sneaky second snooze, or warn you that you have half an hour before you need to leave the house. To your surprise, another two messages have come through whilst you were turning yourself into a human being. One from mum, confirming your time, and another one from James.

That’s a relief I don’t have the energy to be a battering ram

A slight pulse of warmth seems to flare deep inside your chest. You quickly save his number to your contacts before tapping out a reply.

Y: Who has the energy to do anything this early in the morning?

Which is a good point. You need caffeine. And breakfast. And then you need to get a move on. Your phone buzzes as you click the switch on the kettle.

J: Steve

Even as you read that message, another comes through.

J: He’s a morning person its awful

You can picture that: a small smile curls at the corner of your mouth.

Y: I’m truly sorry for you

The next text doesn’t come through until you’re almost out of the door.

J: Sympathy is appreciated

J: Its like living with a puppy half the time

Again, that warm feeling: but you have somewhere to be.

Y: As someone who lives alone, that actually sounds nice

Y: But I have to get to work

You hesitate, stuck on whether you should type what you really want to say- but before you can decide, James has replied.

J: Have fun

J: Talk to you when I’m out of class

At that tiny handful of words, your heart seems to rise a few inches in your ribcage. You shut the door, still smiling, and stride off to the bus stop.

~~

“You’re looking happy,” Lola comments, the instant you walk through the door. Busted. You sigh and wonder if it’s feasible to keep deflecting questions until the end of the day- but Lola is nothing if not persistent. She’s also one of your best work friends. You raise your hands in defeat and drop into your office chair.

“Don’t get too excited,” You say, in a warning tone, “But, newsflash-” You try to imbue the word with a healthy amount of sarcasm, “-There’s a cute guy who’s started Wednesday classes.”

Lola’s eyes light up. She drops her chin onto her hand and fixes you with a look of keen interest.

“Do tell!”

“Ugh,” You wave her away, laughing, “I only met him last week. And I didn’t even like him then.”

“But you like him now?!” Lola wiggles her eyebrows at you again, and you can’t help but giggle even more.

“Stop! But yes, he’s apparently not as much of a jerk as I thought he was.”

“Wonderful.” Lola’s smug grin is practically taking up all of her face. “So, when’s your first date?”

You gawp at her. “Lola, I met him last week. It’s more that…” You trail off, before making sure your tone is sufficiently casual, “It’s more that he’s texting back.”

Lola nods in sympathy. You’ve both had your fair share of non-starting relationships.

“Still, that’s a good start!” She claps her hands together. “I’ll expect every detail.”

You roll your eyes. “As if I could avoid it.” From behind you, your computer (ancient, slow thing that it is) finally makes the chime that signifies you’ve logged in and you spin your chair to face the screen. You already have four emails from four different professors, all asking after different books. You sigh and drag your mind back into focus. Today, at least, there won’t be time for daydreaming.

~~

That evening, you let yourself back into your flat with your phone still held up to your ear as your mum hangs up. Your conversation had been the usual: the run-down on work, whether you were eating, whether you were being a sufficiently sociable human being. Seeing as you could confidently answer all those questions with yes, it was just a pleasant chat rather than an uncomfortable interrogation. Honestly, it’s worth making an effort with life in general just for that.

You drop your possessions on the ratty bean bag on the corner and head for the fridge. You’re starving: thankfully, you have the last of the soup you made last week stashed away. Just as you’re decanting it from Tupperware to saucepan, your phone buzzes.

J: Good day?

You chew on your bottom lip, fighting yet another smile. This was past the point of ridiculous. Nevertheless, you balance your phone in one hand whilst stirring a wooden spoon with the other.

Y: I’ve had worse

Y: You?

No more than a handful of seconds pass before you get a reply.

J: I’ve had worse

J: Faosedddlks

Before you can even form a confused frown, your screen lights up with an incoming call. From James. You stifle the lurch in your abdomen, before tapping accept and lifting the phone to your cheek. “Hello?”

“Hey, Y/N!”

“Oh. Steve?” You can feel your eyebrows drawing together. “Isn’t this James’ phone?”

“Yes!” An abrupt yell echoes down the line; it sounds a lot like James.

“Yeah,” Steve says, sounding unconcerned, “Just wanted to let you know that we’re having a film night on Saturday- us, Nat and Sam, maybe a couple of other people, and we were wondering if you wanted to join?”

“Uh,” You stall for a moment, surprised by the offer, then pull yourself together. “Sure, why not? Do I need to bring anything?”

“What? No! No, not unless you want to.”

“OK. Steve, sorry-” You carefully place the spoon on the side and try to turn off the hob one-handed, “-can I put you on loudspeaker? My soup’s just ready-”

“Oh, don’t worry about it. See you on Saturday, Y/N!” There’s a scuffling noise, then the line goes dead. You quickly drop it on the counter and turn your attention to the saucepan.

J: Sorry about that

J: Steve has a loose definition of personal space

You get the text just as you sit down to eat.

Y: No worries

Y: I have a few friends like that

Lola, for one. Wanda, for another. Clint, come to think of it, for a third. Then a question occurs to you, and you type out a new message.

Y: What time is it on Sat?

The reply is nearly instantaneous.

J: Steve says 7

You ignore the twisting excitement already building in your stomach.

Y: I’ll be there

~~

It’s Saturday evening, and you’re stood on the pavement two streets along from your flat staring up at an imposing red-brick building. The Academy is situated in the rows of old, classy town-houses tucked behind ornate railings at the end of Blackhill Road. Craning your neck, you can see warm yellow light spilling from a window on the second-storey. The faint sound of piano music is just audible.

The door at the top of the steps swings open.

“Hey, Y/N!” Nat smiles at you. She’s dressed in leggings and an oversized sweater with the word Boss printed in capital letters on the front. “Come in!”

You climb up to join her. The door closes behind you and you take in what must be the reception. There’s a shiny wooden desk in the corner, a handful of chairs against one wall, and framed photographs of dancers caught in graceful motion are everywhere you look. Nat, evidently inured to the sight, pays no attention to your gawping and marches to a discreet door tucked in the corner, marked ‘Private’.

“You coming?”

Blinking, you shake yourself out of your reverie and follow her into a narrow passage.

“Used to be the servants’ stairs. Watch your step, they’re pretty steep.”

The only light comes from a dingy bulb on an upper landing, and you take Nat’s advice, treading carefully behind her. “This is fancier than I thought,” You say. “I thought it would be like- like a school, I guess.”

“Oh, the studios aren’t so nice,” Nat says, airily, “But they’re an extension out the back of the house. All the live-in students get rooms in here, though. Makes up for the terrible heating and creaky floorboards.”

“My flat just has the heating and the floorboards,” You joke, and Nat laughs.

“Unfortunately the biggest room is the attic, so you always have a climb to get to the common room.”

“Yeah,” You exaggerate the way your breath is wheezing, “I’d noticed.”

“Fury’s always telling us it’s good for our stamina.”

“Well, the civilians could do with a lift,” You joke. Eventually, though, you manage to make it to the top of the stairs (and, to your credit, you don’t need to lean against the wall to recover. Just). Nat pushes open yet another door, and noise and soft light spills out into the stairwell.

“Look who I found,” She calls, and you step through into what must be the Academy’s student common room.

The room is long and low-ceilinged, with multiple skylights set behind the beams letting in the last of the evening sunshine. Golden fairy-lights are strung up on every surface, emitting a gentle glow. On your left is a tiny counter, with a microwave, kettle and toaster ranged beneath a rack of chipped mugs. On your right are a set of speakers and a book shelf. A small TV is set on a table at the far end of the room, surrounded by a collection of battered chairs, beanbags and one low couch: and ranged around it are James, Steve, Sam, and several people you don’t recognise.

“Y/N! You made it up the stairs!” Steve waves at you, and you grin.

“Yeah, you certainly made me work hard enough to get here.” You follow Nat down the room towards them. You try not to let your eyes linger on James, although it’s hard when he’s tilted his head to look at you, his hair mussed on one side from where he’s been leaning against the back of the armchair.

“Nice of you to drop in,” Sam grins. He’s sprawled on one end of the couch. It’s a slightly strange experience to see them all in casual clothes: somehow, you’ve never pictured them wearing something as relaxed as a hoody, but it is so. James raises a hand and gives you that crooked smile.

“Good to see you.”

You barely have time to smile in return before Steve is half-rising from his seat to introduce you to everyone else.

“So, this is Holly, Sef, Simren and Charlie. We have classes together.”

There are a chorus of greetings, and you nod in return, mentally trying to hold onto their names.

“Shove up, you three,” Nat demands, marching round and dropping onto the cushions. “Somebody else can put the film on.” You carefully squeeze in beside her as Charlie, a lanky Asian guy, scrambles to his feet and shoves a DVD into the slot. James had told you on Friday that they were part-way through a Harry Potter marathon, and you relax as the familiar music soars out from the TV. A handful of people are already singing along. You sneak a glance at James, and see that his mouth is twitching. The thought makes you smile, and you turn your attention back to the film.

Before you know it, the end credits are rolling: Harry’s killed the basilisk and saved the day, to an off-screen accompaniment of quotes, snarky observations and general humour. You’re glad you didn’t put on any mascara- several times you’ve laughed so hard there have been tears leaking from the corners of your eyes.

When the screen finally goes dark, you shift in your seat and carefully stretch. Whilst you’ve been watching, the sky outside has darkened. Sef gets to her feet and starts pulling down the blinds.

“Thanks for having me,” You say, to nobody in particular, sitting up.

“It was fun!”

“Yeah, it was nice to meet you, Y/N.”

You smile across at Holly and Simren. “You, too.”

Steve jumps to his feet and offers you a hand up. “Before you even start complaining, we’re walking you home.” At your thunderous frown, he assumes a pleading expression. “It’s dark!”

“There could be robbers,” Nat interjects, and you turn to glare at her, too.

“Don’t gang up on me.”

She just smirks up at you.

“Fine,” You sigh, “Who else is joining my bodyguard detail?”

“I’ll come.” James shrugs his way out of his chair and stretches all the way out, his hands grazing the ceiling. You try not to react.

“Anyone else coming for a walk?” Steve asks. Sam shakes his head.

“Nah, man. I’m keeping the corner spot for as long as I’ve got it.”

Nat’s already elongating to take up the space you and Steve have vacated. Steve snorts at her. “Guess that answers that question. Right, let’s go.”

The three of you walk back across the common room and start down the stairs.

“So are you up for joining us on the regular?” Steve asks. “It’s nice to see people who don’t also live with you every once in a while.”

“Ah,” You snicker, “I’m only here for the window dressing, I see how it is. But sorry, next week…” You trail off into thought.

“Next week?” James prompts.

“Sorry- it’s just that I was planning to have a night in with Wanda and Pepper, but- I don’t want to presume on your hospitality or anything-”

“They’re welcome!” Steve says, instantly, “More the merrier, right, Buck?”

“Sure,” James says. “Nice to have some new faces.”

“I’ll just check with them, but I’m sure they’ll be down.” You make a mental note to text them both later. You’ve finally reached the bottom of the stairs and push through the door, before drawing up short: two people are stood in the reception, and they both seem to practically radiate authority.

“Rogers. Barnes.” The imposing dark-skinned man addresses your companions. “Heading out?”

“Yes, sir,” Steve answers. “Just walking Y/N home.”

“Be sure to sign out,” The woman standing beside him warns. Steve seems to straighten up.

“Yes, ma’am.”

A small smile touches the brunette’s lips.

“Just Miss Carter, Rogers.”

“Sure, Miss Carter,” James interjects, politely. “We’ll just sign out.” He pats Steve on the shoulder before retrieving a register from the far side of the desk and scribbling down their names. Miss Carter and her companion disappear through the double doors at the back of the room, and you notice Steve relaxing. It’s not until the three of you are safely out on the street that you ask your question.

“Who was that?”

“That’s Director Fury. He runs the Academy. And Miss Carter, who takes the Advanced Ballet Class.”

“Oh. Oh.” You glance at Steve, your brain putting two and two together. “They’re- um, kind of scary?”

James snorts. “You’re not kidding. Although Mr T is worse.”

“He’s our teacher,” Steve tells you, apparently recovering his voice. “And yeah, he kind of is.”

“Why?” You can’t help a note of teasing sliding into your voice. “Is he a tyrant?”

“Oh, worse than that,” James smirks, “He’s perfect. So, he expects nothing less from us, too.”

You shudder theatrically. “He sounds like Wanda.”

“Is she really that bad?” James sounds sceptical.

“Yes! Just you wait until we’re in the run up to a competition. She’s terrifying, trust me.”

“We’ll take your word for it.” You feel like Steve is just humouring you, but they’ll see. Wanda takes absolutely no prisoners.

“Have you both been practicing?” You ask, as the three of you cross over the road to enter your street.

Steve snorts. “We have to take it in turns. There’s not enough floor-space in our dorm for us both to dance at the same time.”

“So you admit that commercial dance has some worth, then?” You instantly seize your opportunity, grinning broadly at James’ exasperated expression.

“You know, I think that dance hipster comment really stung his pride, Y/N-” Steve starts, right before James pushes him off the curb.

“Good,” You say, smugly, “If it turns him from a hipster into a nerd, I’ll be satisfied.”

“Now I get why you invited her,” James growls, “So that you have someone to gang up on me with.”

“Glad to be of service.” You stick out your tongue at him as Steve laughs. “And thank you, once again, for your assistance-” You’ve reached your flat, “- And I’ll see you both on Wednesday?”

“See you, kid!” Steve calls, now leaping around trying to dodge James’ attempts to pull him into a headlock. Laughing, you wave at the pair of them, before hopping into the porch and unlocking the door, their shouts and curses ringing in your ears.

AN: Tagging continues rampant. If you liked a couple of the previous parts, I’ve tagged you. Drop me a line if it’s no longer your thing and I’ll remove you :) Chapter ten is now complete ( @systemfailuresunshine was shrieking at me, just to give you a taste of what’s to come) so I’ll keep on posting at a frankly reckless rate. Thank you darlings for your engagement so far <3

Tag list: @plumsforbuck2016; @learisa; @themarvelousmaximoffs; @blonde0n; @debzybrazy; @vintagesaph; @casdoesntunderstandthatreference; @imthemishamigo; @smaug-the-homedog; @seb-styles;  @madeofstarsdust; @buckybabybaby

Part 4

#bucky x reader #bucky imagine #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes x reader #I wrote a thing #Feeling Alive #Feeling Alive Part Three #Bucky rly doesn't have time for appropriate punctuation #Also I have Brit mannerisms #If that's going to annoy you then *shrug*

[abberaticn-blog]

i’ve never done a follow forever before. like ever. idk why. but i just wanna take the time to post a special shout out to these people who have been w/ me the longest and have like. blown my mind in more ways than one ??? but like legit tho we’ve known each other for soooooooo longgggggg like back when i had the disaster that is mark puckerman and here’s your shot of “i love u” from me

@jxsontodd : ok but srsly , how old are you kit ????? like ??? how long have you had jason ????? TOO LONG and yet ???? you still LOOK FAB roleplaying him ???? honestly tho idk if u remember our first encounter bUT IT WAS LIKE. SO FORMAL. it’s awkward as hell. but thank u so much for giving me a chance ‘cause we ended up rping and i had so much fun ???? like ??? SOSOSOSO MUCH FUN ???? and u’ve helped me , like. a lot. like you literally helped me grew and shit and im ??? so baffled that i can call you my friend or — at least — one of my longest rp partner and honestly. honestly you have a HEART OF GOLD and you deserve every kindness that comes your way. honestly.

@myatonements / @forgottengoddess​ : or WHEREVER THE HELL YOU ARE BECAUSE WHEREVER IT IS,,, IM RIGHT BEHIND YOU SUPPORTING YOUR MUSE AND WHATEVER YOU DO. but here it is my declaration of love for you , mandy , one of my ??? good ??? friend ??? LIKE EVEN TALKING ABOUT YOU HAD ME GRINNING EAR TO EAR ITS EMBARRASSING OH MY GOD I WILL FOLLOW YOU EVERYWHERE ?????? every muse you do is special. it’s amazing. it’s spectacular . even ur oc that you named after me, remember? DAS RIGHT. YOU’RE STUCK WITH ME. I LOVE YOU. REMEMBER THAT.

@longlocked : ROO. MY SPECIAL SUN , MY LIGHT , MY STARS , MY MOON . WHERE WOULD I BE WITHOUT YOU ????? listen up. idk how we met — because for the life of me, i can’t remember — but you stayed, and that’s what matters, and we hAD THE GREATEST OF TIMES TOGETHER and you just accepted all of my muse despite knowing ZERO THINGS about them like literally i swear to god your heart is made of FLOWERS AND SUNSHINE AND RAINBOWS and i do not deserve you like,,,,, AT ALL. but you’re here anyway and i’m planning to keep you for a long time because i just ??? ADORE YOU ???? and you helped me so much too like with EVERYTHING and you’re just. amazing. i would trust you with my whole life.

@milehighmechanic : nat. nat oh nat nAT MY LOVE. okay i first know you from daniel sousa and we had like, such a great time, and honestly i just ??? ? ?? i’ve been following your ass ever since ??? your take on tony it’s — it’s amazing. and i remember the feeling i had when i told you about who francis was, and despite not expecting anything out of you cause like. i KNOW how much the NA fandom is not popular at all but you surprised me. because you involved yourself in the next avengers fandom and embraced and i remember like ??? like i wanted to SALUTE you because , you LITERALLY DIDN’T HAVE TO , but you did, and you took a CHANCE on us and it means SOOOOO MUCH and hands down, you have 100% of my respect. i hope things are better for you after these rough few days because tbh u deserve it

fun fact , despite knowing these four the longest / or have talked the most on this hellsite can y’all believe we haven’t changed discord , ever , except for roo and that’s only recently ?? ??? ? this is cause our bond is STRONG

#positivity #UGH I LOVE THESE BAND OF LOSERS SO MUCH #DIS MY SQUAD Y'ALL #i have more like taylor and sarah and jane anD IM SURE IM FORGETTING A FEW PEOPLE #BUT YEAH #THESE FOUR IS MY CORE #C O R E