#husbando rate

[vividblaze]

My thief is out there stealin' hearts instead.

#dragon's dogma #dragon's dogma 2 #amadeus: i know you just woke up but i'm back from the rift and gotta tell you about how strong this one arisen i met was #kyrie (an insufferably possessive and jealous woman): absolutely not... #ty to that one arisen who keeps hiring my pawn and leaving a heart rating lmfao(???) #if you're aiming for that reverse harem playthrough I AM WISHING YOU THE BEST HUSBANDO LAIFU 🫡 #also sorry for not upgrading his gear in a while because aesthetics/fashion is my priority

[purplehanfu]

Rating the Husbandos: The Story of Kunning Palace

notes: Spoilers! You really have your pick of men in this drama- but are any of them husband material?

Thoughtfully considered ratings behind the cut:

Xie Wei

A mysterious, tragic past is not a personality.

pros: Sexy as he looms over you in his fur collared capes. Exhibits very progressive thinking on women's issues. Which is strange considering all of his cons (see below).

cons: Explosive temper; violent; acts like he owns you; keeps trying to choke you (and not in a sexy consensual way); expects you to be grateful when he doesn't kill you in service to his grand revenge plan. Tough guy demeanor which he can only back up with the judicious application of his lackeys. Backstory so complicated you kind of lose interest. Looks like he has conjunctivitis a lot of the time.

hobbies: Making qins and tracking the wood shavings all over the house. Being afraid of snow except when the plot requires him not to be.

sexxin: Endless stamina and exquisite anatomy. Too bad he has no idea what he's doing. Cries after sex and gets mad when you laugh about it (why would you do that you monster).

Grade: C-

Zhang Zhe

Sometimes being hot is enough.

pros: HANDSOME

cons: His devotion to truth and justice will probably get him killed in the course of some courtly intrigues but the real tragedy is that he will never lie to spare your feelings. He will, however, compare your cooking unfavorably to his mother's.

hobbies: Restoring antiques; doing his own laundry

sexxin: Pathetic but you have to pretend it's great or he will become obsessed with improvement. At least the view is nice.

Grade: C

Yan Lin

A cheerful sweet ray of murderous sunshine.

pros: Smart, handsome, thoughtful, loyal, excellent martial arts, terrifying military skillset. You're his one and only, his ride-or-die, his day one.

cons: Related to Xie Wei

hobbies: Swordplay (see below)

sexxin: Complete freak in the sheets. Hope you have a strong bed and a soundproof bedroom, you're going to need both.

Grade: A+

Yan Lin's Dad

Reporting for duty.

pros: Has his own army but doesn't make a big thing about it (the Emperor and Xue family do, however).

cons: Frequently has the intensity dialed up to 11 when the situation clearly calls for a 6.

hobbies: Carving figurines for his 3-D map sandbox thing

sexxin: As expected of a military man he is good at taking orders and completing missions. His courage tongue should be awarded for its service to the nation you

grade: B+

Emperor

Heaven must have a sense of humor because it mandated this guy.

pros: Easily seduced by you.

cons: Easily seduced by people other than you. Married. Paranoid. Sickly but that might just be poison (if so add "unable to poison him" to the con list).

hobbies: Marveling at how good he is at seducing people.

sexxin: His game is as weak as his constitution.

grade: a solid F unless you want to murder your way to Empress, then he's a D

Fake Xie Wei

Ain't nothing like the real thing.

pros: social butterfly at parties, everyone knows him, can give you a wild night out on the town even if it's Tuesday and you're in some backwater village.

cons: is an actual con artist

hobbies: Collecting STDs

sexxin: so good you might be tempted to forgive him for his wandering eye. Don't. Just enjoy him if you must and move on.

Grade: D-

Gu Chun Fang

Hear me out.

You've been married more than 40 years. When your parents first arranged your marriage he snuck into your rooms that night to make sure you were ok with it. You fell in love at first sight. You never had children despite years of trying but he has never so much as looked at another woman. You come from a huge family and he has many young subordinates so your mansion is always very lively. Your New Year's parties are the stuff of legend.

pros: In all his years as an official he has never once made you get up early to help him get ready for court sessions.

cons: Would have no clothes if you did not buy them for him, would never eat if you did not arrange his meals, would fall asleep at his desk if you did not force him to come to bed.

hobbies: Collecting weird ugly giant rocks which he deposits in the various courtyard gardens of your mansion. Pretending to fish but really just taking a nap.

sexxin: After all these years you can still make him blush with a whispered invitation. Adorable.

Grade: A+ but he's not available and never will be

Dao Qin

It's always the quiet ones.

pros: Loyal; physique that was created as though by the gods themselves; surprisingly high EQ

cons: Kinda sad life made this guy an NPC when he has such strong main character energy.

hobbies: designing and crafting hidden weapons and/or cat toys

sexxin: You have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good.

Grade: B+

Master list of all show recaps etc.

#the story of kunning palace #zhang ling he #zhou jun wei #wang xingyue #this may become a regular feature #rating the husbandos

[fereldanwench]

it always throws me off how fast my non-modded cp77 game loads vs my modded one djfghdjfgdfg

on the modded on, i can grab myself a drink and a snack before it gets to the title screen, and on the vanilla one, it's like instantaneous lmao

#t: wench games #g: cyberpunk 2077 #husbando is a frame rate fiend and my modded game drives him insane bc it's usually around 50 FPS lmao #and im always like STOP WORRYING ABOUT IT #that's not the version i actually play on

[circyexistforcontent]

You guys really like sibling scaramouche huh?

#Im just looking at my activity and I'm just seeing my post about scara rating your genshin husbando getting so much attention #Your not suppose to be the clingy to scara its suppose to be reverse #Scara is suppose to be the one liking platonic headcanons about you #genshin impact x reader

[kurim-chis]

Finally went and learnt how to do this warp history thingie. As of September 14 2023 this is my luck with the banners!

Luocha’s number is kinda funny. 😂

If I had gotten Luocha at pity 76, I would have all the numbers from 75 to 78 😂👏

#honkai star rail #hsr #HSR has been very kind to me #100% win rate for the banners so far!!! #the same can’t be said for the stellar standard banner #no husbandos from there yet 💔

[shih-coulda-had-it]

# 27 from the 200 lemon dialogue ❤️ sorahiko and sakumo

27. "Oh honey, you know, you really shouldn't tease me." | shimurastorino, with a focus on sorahiko/husbando shimura| wc: 725

a/n: established OT3, but Nana and Sakumo are engaged to be married.

//

This year, the N.H.A. had the novel idea to dedicate two nights to honoring their employees. Last week had been for the solo pro-heroes, which Nana had attended as Sakumo’s plus-one. Tonight is for the pro-heroes who are registered partners or teams, which means that Sakumo is now her plus-one, as Sorahiko can’t dodge the invite.

It’s probably one of the noisiest holiday gala Sorahiko’s attended in recent years.

Sorahiko doesn’t know who handled the invites, because it sounds like every pro-hero and their squad of interns is crashing the party. Cheap complimentary beer and wine and some concoction of a punch being passed around—it’s a recipe for mayhem, especially with the hired orchestra switching out to a DJ playing exclusive club music. No one notices Sorahiko and Sakumo fleeing for quieter pastures.

Like this bathroom.

“You’re not needed elsewhere?” Sakumo asks, as Sorahiko kicks the door shut behind them. Almost immediately, the party is muffled and the only real distinct noise Sorahiko hears is Sakumo’s frazzled breathing.

He turns the lock and turns on his heel, instinct telling him to take in his surroundings. “Nana can handle a potential riot. You looked like you were on the brink of a sensory overload.”

The bathroom is large enough for maybe four individual stalls, but it only houses one toilet and sink. The wallpaper is a touch old-fashioned, but the tiles and grout are clean, and the countertop isn’t even stained with the remnants of antibacterial soap. It’s pretty nice.

Sakumo stands at the center, tugging at his bowtie. Beads of sweat sit at his temple, wisps of hair stick flat to his forehead.

“I wasn’t expecting the crowd.”

“I don’t think the hosts were either,” Sorahiko says drily, and picks at his cufflinks for lack of anything else to fiddle with. “You alright, though? I saw Nana on our way out.”

She’d seen him dragging her fiancé by the hand, navigating the cliques by cold-shouldering anyone too slow to jump away. Sorahiko gestured once to the wilting, sweating, shallow-breathing figure he towed alongside him, then to the nearest bathroom. 

A quick hand-sign: Be there soon. And he flashed an acknowledgment before continuing to haul Sakumo out of the swarming young adults determined to make the best of a paid holiday.

“Anything she trusts you to handle, I do too,” says Sakumo.

“... So there’s something bothering you.”

“Not so alarming as that.” The toothy, rueful smile reminds him of Nana, though there’s a notable fanged edge to Sakumo’s mouth in comparison.

“What, can you still hear the music? Or did somebody mess with your drink?”

Sakumo lets out a laugh. “No, no, it’s, ah… You’re not wearing a tie, Sorahiko. Between Nana’s dress and your unbuttoned shirt, it’s hard to tell who I’m drooling over more.”

He processes, then concludes: Sakumo wrenched his adrenaline-fueled panic into horny mode.

Nana’s strapless gown is midnight-blue and as glittery as a night sky; it hugs her breasts and cinches at the waist and falls straight down to her ankles. There’s a slit at the front of the skirt, off-centered, high enough that Nana can comfortably kick any offenders in the gut. It is also much more sexy than Sorahiko’s standard tuxedo.

“You’re too kind,” says Sorahiko, rolling his eyes. Then an idea strikes like a match. “I’m not showing nearly enough skin to match her. Could probably fix that, though.”

Sakumo’s eyes gleam under the cold blue fluorescent lighting. He licks his lips. “Need some help?”

“Nah,” he says, and rolls his neck. He shrugs off his blazer in slow, relaxed movements, folds it in half and tosses it over to the sink. Then Sorahiko undoes and pockets his cufflinks. He takes a step back so he can lean against the door. With his hands down by his lap, he splays his fingers over his building arousal, exhales.

Instead of unzipping his trousers, though, he switches tracks and rolls his sleeves up to his elbows.

He hears the abrupt step forward first, and then feels Sakumo rushing up against him, hands going to pin Sorahiko’s by his head and tongue going for Sorahiko’s parted lips. Sakumo kisses like he’s starving for affection. Sorahiko tastes white wine and lets himself moan, rolling his hips against Sakumo’s. 

Breathless, Sakumo rumbles, “Oh honey, you know, you really shouldn’t tease me.”

#bnha #shimurastorino #stand-in name for husbando shimura #gran torino #torino sorahiko #lemon #shih.txt #asks #anon #d-december #feels like i'm tagging lemon too liberally now #with more time this would actually earn that m rating!!! #but we're on a time limit today and now i have to go run errands

[lovova]

I think I’ve just been thinking about it too long but, like, Kaito is just Nagito with more social skills and less murderous impulses.

#kaito momota #nagito komaeda #I guess saying it another way Kaito is just Makoto but with pecs #And a personality #And a better waifu/husbando survivor rate #I am definitely overthinking it I'm gonna come back to this later and have no idea what I was talking about

[starlit-typewriter]

Genshin SAGAU, Creator of Teyvat, but not Humanity Part 1

Playing around with the idea of The creator of Teyvat, not being the creator of humanity.

Masterlist | Next Part

~~~

You were never much of a gamer.

Not that you disliked games of course, but it never quite clicked with you the way it did others. You’d try a couple of games on and off, but there would always be a point where it’d become boring.

Not that there was anything bad about the games themselves, you freely complimented the design and effort it goes into making these masterful pieces of art and code.

You just, weren't a gamer.

Until Genshin Impact

You can still remember the day you heard of it.

You were chatting with friends and one of them brought up this new game they saw a promotion for that they were interested in trying.

It was this anime-esque gacha game.

They showed you a couple trailers and promotional materials, and you must admit they were quite appealing.

However you didn’t intend to try it, knowing that you’d eventually drop it and move on.

But your friend still pestered you, claiming that there’s no harm in trying and dropping another game, after all it’s free anyways, so you’re not losing out on anything monetary.

Skeptical, you joined them in trying out the game.

And

Well

Let’s just say your friend got more than a couple of “I told you so’s” that day

It was beautiful.

The art, the music, the characters.

Everything about this game just, clicked.

You understand why people got so obsessed with certain games.

Why they would be willing to pay for things such as this.

Why this is such a large industry.

It’s, well it’s fun.

It was honestly quite frightening how quickly the game pulled you in.

You never understood the term “completionist”, until it started to apply to you.

Every quest, every domain, every achievement

You did it all

Every dialogue, every story, every entry in the archive.

You read it all.

You scoured the forums for bits of lore, and shrieked with your friend every time something new was dropped.

Genshin was all consuming.

It was honestly quite concerning, if it weren’t for the fact it was time gated with its resin cap and limited content, your outside life probably would’ve suffered.

On some level you probably knew that this was not normal. Your friends who were all gamers as well were never as obsessed over a single game as you were over Genshin.

But you reassured yourself, this is the first game that made you feel this way, its natural for you to go a little overboard.

I’m sure it’ll die down as I try out other games.

But you never really did.

No other game, no matter how popular or similar or highly rated.

Other games from Hoyoverse fared slightly better in terms of attention span.

But you always went back to Genshin.

Not that it bothered you.

Genshin was enough, considering you still had real world responsibilities to balance.

And that was that.

Until, well.

Until Fontaine.

You see, you’d always enjoyed the characters of Teyvat.

But you’ve never quite simped after them the way the fanbase did.

You admired their aesthetics and enjoyed their stories. But they never quite drew you in.

Even your main, was quite honestly determined by meta and whatever character you’ve managed to get your hands on.

There was never a “waifu” or “husbando”.

It was always the world and story that drew you in rather than individual characters.

Iudex Neuvillette was an exception.

The exception

He felt right.

You immediately knew you had to pull for him.

So you did.

And playing him was amazing. He was as meta breaking as you’d hoped and, well, you just liked him.

“Your first official Husbando” your friends would tease. You understand why they would go such lengths for a specific character now.

He was special.

He was a Dragon.

He felt, right.

You quite never understood why

Not until you entered the world of Teyvat.

That story,

Well,

That begins from the other side of the screen.

~~~

“I bet we can definitely open up a whole new sector in Fontaine if all goes well don't you think?” Hu Tao chattered as she and Zhongli strolled back to Liyue Harbor.

Zhongli hummed in agreement, only half paying attention to the conversation. He could tell Hu Tao noticed, since she was keeping the topic of conversation to light topics that anyone with half a mind could parse through. Only enough relevance so that he wouldn’t get lost in thought, but not so much that he had to focus on the conversation.

She was considerate like that, he knew since she had let many of his oddities slide, especially when he was still adjusting to mortal life.

Not that he was free from old habits mind you.

Zhongli doubted he would ever truly be able to blend into a crowd of mortal without some level of adept arts concealing his presence, however he was able to blend in enough so that the average nosy person was able to wave off his eccentricities a simply a facet of his personality rather than something deeper.

He cannot forget that it was thanks to people such as Hu Tao who were willing to let him in without many questions that allowed him to get to this point. Something he will be forever grateful for.

Be that as it may, it did not change the fact that some things will forever be kept secret.

His near encounter with the Hydro dragon for one.

Even from the other side of Qiaoying village where he’d made himself scarce, he could feel the amount of blessings placed upon the man.

He truly was favored by the creator.

Not that that was any surprise.

What was surprising was his own blessing.

Though much smaller, he still treasured the gift given to him by the creator of Teyvat.

Teyvat, after all, was a world of Dragons.

It was due to the advent of The Primordial One, did they lose their authority.

Not that many people knew.

Most people didn’t

The true History and creation of Teyvat was kept tightly wrapped, even the most learned scholars of the Akademiya could only infer at what truly happened, as well as the origin of humanity.

The true name of the creator was lost to time, only their title of the creator of Teyvat remaining. The mortals who lived on Teyvat daren’t give them another for fear of evoking their wrath.

They had plenty to be wrathful about.

Zhongli would only imagine his own rage, if anything similar happened to Liyue.

Imagine putting in centuries upon centuries of work only for an outsider to come in, destroy your work and reshape it for their own people. Before proceeding to have the audacity to name him as a contributor to their success and praise alongside such an usurper.

Just imagining it makes him angry.

That is why, the creator’s title is rarely evoked.

Names have power after all.

Names of gods even more so.

To evoke their name, their title, is to ask for attention.

Attention that would be safer left elsewhere.

Not that mortals knew the true reason.

The commonly accepted reasoning was that the creator of Teyvat has long turned their gaze elsewhere, satisfied with the current ruling of Teyvat, having entrusted their powers to Celestia and the Archons.

Zhongli would feel guilt at this blatant lie and rewriting of history if he could.

But he cannot, because to feel guilt would be to regret his actions and to wish something was different.

But he knew that he, along with all of humanity, Liyue Harbor, his Adepti and friends. They would not have existed, they would not have lived, has history played out justly.

The world is not just.

The world simply is.

He feared to an extent that the Hydro dragons would try to force a more cruel version of justice upon Fontaine, condemning them all as usurpers, when they had no idea, or even power over what had happened in the past.

Thankfully it seems that Focalors’s plan to integrate him into humanity worked. Stemming any sort of “justice” he may enact on humanity for the crimes of The Primordial One. In fact, he seems to have great fondness over humanity, absolving them of their sin and saving them from the prophecy that threatened Fontaine for so many centuries.

However, he knew that he was exempt from this mercy. Zhongli knew that when the time came, the Hydro dragon, or well Iudex Neuvillette would spare no effort in holding him accountable for his actions in usurping the original order of Teyvat.

Which is exactly why he avoided the man, dragon? as he did.

“-ello, earth to Zhongli, ”

Zhongli blinked, Hu Tao’s voice dragging him back to their situation at hand.

“Ah, my apologies, I seemed to have been lost in thought”

She clicked her tongue at him, “Aiyyaa, honestly Zhongli, I wonder sometimes if your age is getting to you, I was trying to get your attention for quite a while”

“Is that so,”

Zhongli couldn’t help but smile at her exaggerated groan.

“I was merely thinking about some old history,” he started, preparing himself to finish the history of Qiaoying village that he was telling Hu Tao on their way over.

“Oh no, there’s no need for that,” she waved off, a slight grimace on her face.

He knew how bored she was by the story the way over, so it served as a perfect distraction on the way back to stop her from questioning any further.

“Honestly a girl can only listen so much about the different varieties of teas and their subtle notes and flavoring before she has to burst yo know,” she complained.

“Well, the history of tea has a -”

“Oh look we’re almost there!” She pointed out, most likely in a desperate bid to stop him from droning on.

He was being slightly unfair to her, he knows, but it never ceases to become unassuming when people try to fake interest in a topic, only to regret it when they realize just how much there is to know about it.

Of course it can never compare to when someone has a genuine passion for the topic and wants to engage further, but those mortals are rare.

More often than not, he can use his vast knowledge as a smokescreen too, well, as Paimon would most likely put it. Bore people into leaving him alone.

He waves off Hu Tao as she bounces back home, and allows himself to take a stroll through the streets of Liyue Harbor.

The Lantern Rite was ending, another celebration successfully done under the hard work of the Qixing

He gazed around at all the sights, the lanterns, the food stalls, the beautiful atmosphere of people enjoying the celebration.

No

He could never regret what he did.

Not since it lead to peace and happiness like this.

And

If things are as he suspects.

He may never have too.

He feels it once more.

The glow of the creator's blessing.

He can feel it swirling within him as he steps through Liyue Harbor.

He wonders if they can see it as he does. Sees the beauty and resplendence of humanity.

Look, he wants to scream

They are nothing like The Primordial One

They are good, kind and beautiful.

Humans may not be your creation, they may not have originated from this world but that does not mean they do not deserve to stay.

But he doesn’t

First of all because he feels that screaming these things in the middle of a busy street may attract some weird looks.

But also out of fear, fear that any attempt to disrupt this fragile peace could lead to destruction.

Because it is fragile, it has only been a couple of years since the creator has turned their eyes to Teyvat.

Those who have been blessed have been careful in their own way not to destroy this chance that the creator has given them.

A chance to prove themselves, not only as people deserving of their attention and blessing, but as a people.

To prove themselves just as worthy of the dragons of staying in Teyvat.

Because they all know, in their hearts of hearts, that what the creator has created, they could just as easily destroy.

While some may tease him for his age, there is no denying that with age comes experiences that the younger generation may never know.

He himself, whilst having been born long after the disappearance of the creator, witnessed firsthand how it had affected the world.

How Godly remains tainted the earth for far longer than it used to.

How miasma and abyssal energy started to leak forth.

How Leyline disorders became more and more commonplace.

Teyvat was breaking.

It was falling apart.

But perhaps.

With this new chance, it could be fixed.

He could still remember the day the creator first turned their gaze upon Teyvat.

Or well, more specifically, the first time they turned their gaze on him.

He had heard rumors of an outlander from Mondstatdt making their way to Liyue. Tales of their feats and defeating Dvalin with the wayward Anemo Archon were as prevalent as talks about the upcoming Rite of Descension.

He had taken note of it of course, outlanders were rare after all, but he hadn’t expected this one to be quite, consequential.

Not until he met them.

He felt their approach funnily enough, the unbranded aura they carried within them. While he could’ve written it off as an aspect of their outlander status, internally he knew it not to be true.

He was far too young to have ever met the creator, or even the original dragons.

But he has stumbled upon their remnants.

Pure remnants, unlike the gnosis which have been twisted and altered by the time it had spent in the hands of The Primordial One.

It was, indescribable.

Free, yet grounded.

Unwavering yet fluid.

Swift yet languid.

It

It simply was

It was the essence of Teyvat.

The essence of the land he lived and fought and bled and laughed in.

How could he not worship it.

How could he not fear it.

He had felt Childe walk in with bated breath, distracting himself with his cup of tea to settle his nerves.

What did this mean?

Was this the end of Liyue, of humanity, of Teyvat?

Over the centuries people have accepted the creator’s complacency in the affairs of Teyvat.

What does it now mean that they have focused their gaze once more on this land.

Destruction

Salvation

He daren’t hope or guess.

But

Well,

The Traveler was kind.

They had no ill will towards the people of Teyvat.

While it was clear they had their own mission to stove for, they did not hesitate in helping those they can along the way.

If the creator has blessed one such as them, one so kind to humans, one with no ill will.

Perhaps.

A seed of hope planted itself in him, and refused to budge.

As time went on, the seed grew.

Hope grew.

The tiny seed of hope that he tried so hard to ignore and deny could be ignored no longer when he received a blessing himself.

He could still remember it so clearly.

It was a normal day, nothing out of the ordinary. He went to work, had tea, chatted with passersby.

There were no great feats.

No great revelations, or offerings.

Yet he felt it for the first time.

A blessing.

A pure, gentle, powerful blessing.

He could feel the sentiment behind it, weak as it was.

Relief, excitement, apprehension.

He wanted to cry, to pray. To thank them for giving him a chance, for giving the people of Teyvat a chance.

But fear held him back.

It still does to this day.

That’s the problem with gods, their pleasure and their wrath can often look the same.

Even as he compared notes with Barbatos and the Adepti, confirming that many of them have been given blessings.

While some like Ganyu, rejoiced in this blessing eager for a chance to prove themselves worthy of this world.

People such as him were still fearful.

Fearful of what this meant and what they wanted.

The straw that broke the camel’s back was when he realized that xiangling was also blessed.

Not that the girl knew, after all the creator was very rarely spoken of, only ever mentioned in ancient rites and the most descriptive of history books.

But she had the blessing, a human.

From that point he saw so many others, so many humans, mere mortals given their divine blessing and gaze.

An exorcist, an author, a member of the Qixing.

It spread across Teyvat, whispers as people soon realized that there was a god, an unknown god blessing them.

Granting them abilities beyond their visions, oftentimes enhancing them to levels beyond previously known human limits.

No one dared to say their name, they were insinuations, and speculations, but no one dared disturbed the fragile peace that has settled.

It is an understanding between those who have it.

Those who know, know and those who don’t are kept in the dark.

But it seems that the Creator has turned their gaze to Teyvat and to humans.

~~~~

Masterlist | Next Part

~~~~

Tell me what you guys think!

#genshin impact #genshin sagau #genshin impact sagau #sagau #genshin cult au #My writing

[cosmicstarlatte]

Reality Show (Obey Me!)

━━━━━━━━━━ ✦ ━━━━━━━━━━

Diavolo convinces Lucifer to have him & his brothers do a new demon reality show that revolves around their everyday lives.

»Characters: Demon Bros // ->[Click here for Part 2: Dateables]

»Tags: LUCIFER CAUGHT IN 4K, Shitpost/Humor, Mentions of reader/MC, Husbando Beel Supremacy, Bulleted Style

»Notes: CM = Crew Member ;; Sorry I was gonna upload this sooner but wanted to draw art for it. xD

Lucifer:

"Okay that's enough, go somewhere else."

CM: "We can't, you agreed to this under contract"

sighs

Mildly regretted his loyalty to Diavolo, otherwise he would've never done this

His camera crew was always on edge with him

The show stressed him more than usual

Perhaps there were a few embarrassing moments he would prefer not to talk about

Like pushing a door that said pull, forgetting the word spoon and calling it a tiny bowl on a stick

[Camera peeks through Lucifer's study, recording a smiling Lucifer texting on his phone]

CM: "Who were you texting Lucifer? Was it ___? There's been rumors..."

"I was checking the weather."

CM: "You take selfies for the weather?"

Mammon:

"Hey wait stop recordin' this! Not that what we are doin' is illegal!"

His camera crew had a rough time with him

But it made for good television!

He talked shit about Lucifer the most

"Yeah a lotta people dunno this, but Lucifer cries to me all the time! What can I say, I'm a reliable guy!"[Crew zooms in on an unamused Lucifer in the background]

[Cut to Mammon hanging from the ceiling]

"Can someone get me down from here!? HEY! WHERE ARE YOU GUYS GOIN'!?"

A lot of the crew's clips had shaky movement from running due to multiple mammon situations

They got a great swoon-worthy shot of Mammon gazing lovingly at you

CM: "Maybe you should confess?"

"I'm confessin' to nothin'! Talk to my lawyer!"

CM: "That's not what we- Nevermind."

Levi:

"I already stream online so this isn't any different."

lol

Levi didn't realize they'd be watching his every move

How was he suppose to worship his shrine of Ruri and you in front of them!?

His camera crew couldn't stop cringing around the otaku

it was uncomfortable for everyone

[Camera films secret sweet moment of him awkwardly practicing asking if you want to hang out]

He asked for it to be deleted, it was denied

However his ratings shot up after that clip and the next one:

CM: "Do you have a crush on ___?"

"W-what!? N-no!!! (Incoherent Levi noises and he trips)"

That clip became a viral meme for weeks

I'm talking remixes and everything

In the end his camera crew actually did have a lot of fun with him and they game online together now

Satan:

"Watch your step. Oh, don't touch that!"

His camera crew had a difficult time with him

He managed to avoid them frequently so he wasn't overly present in the show, much to the annoyance of Lucifer and the others

If they did catch him, all the clips looked the same, all he did was read

They did manage to catch him feeding some stray devildom kitties

[Camera zooms in on him in his room with a collared cat on his lap]

CM: "I thought you couldn't have pets?"

"It's not mine. Clearly, I can't control what comes in my room as of late."

CM:  "It has a collar?"

"Next question."

CM: "What can you tell us about the Anti-Lucifer League?"

"I don't know what you're talking about. Next question."

CM: "Okay... viewers want to know what's up with you and ___?"

[Satan opens a book and gets sucked in]

Asmo:

"It's like, Devilgram Live, but longer!"

Most unbothered out of everyone

He did get annoyed when they tried to catch him before he could start his morning beauty routine

He was scary, they caught it on camera...it was the only time the crew deleted a clip on a brothers request

Overall his crew had an easy time, it was standard to what they normally do, Asmo himself was fun

He was a natural, of course everyone loved him, who wouldn't?

Was the one to start drama for the sake of tv

Nothing too crazy just messed with Luci's schedule, got Mammon arrested, hid Levi's Ruri body pillow, little things really!

[Camera catches Asmo cuddling next to you]

CM: "You seem very fond of them!"

"I am! Oh maybe we can do like a one year WEDDING special later on!?"

Beel:

"Just don't get in my way I guess."

He wasn't really on board with the idea but not much he could do

His crew had an average time with him, he was easy and chill to film

They caught him doing a lot of activities like, cooking/baking, sports, gaming, it was surprising to viewers

His work out clips got a lot of views too, he was a busy demon

They filmed him helping around the house, even cleaning your room and leaving you little gift snacks

CM: "Wow, snacks? You must really like ___!"

"Yeah. I love them. I want to give them the world."He confidently admitted, smiling brightly

Had high ratings in the polls, the show gave everyone a new perspective of him who wasn't just a gluttonous beast

Belphie:

CM: "Is he breathing?"

"Zzz..."

The crew had an easy but boring time with him

There's only so many hours of a sleeping Belphie you can record

The were some soft serene moments with him,Beel and you, gazing at the stars

[Camera catches him sleeping, smiling and mumbling something about you]

CM (poking): "Belphie wanna share what you were dreaming about? We heard you call their name. "

"Only if the network agrees to air it unfiltered. It will be very descriptive."

CM:

CM: "That's a wrap guys."

⬦You might also like: MC's Livestream

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me shitpost #obey me humor #obey me headcanons #obey me hcs #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me fic #obey me crack #obey me imagines #◇˖・ﾟ— › cosmic obey me . ⊹ #shitpostcifer

[nuttytani]

Reacting to you playing otome games

characters: dan heng and jing yuan

tw: none except- maybe not proof read?

a/n: i guess we can officially say i'm obsessed with hsr now. my brain has been annoying me to write something for these two boys, and... i guess here we are.

Dan Heng

From all the world-saving and stellaron crisis, Dan Heng wasn’t able to spend much time with you, much to his dismay. Yes, he’d share a few text messages once in a while or even call each other, but those days were getting rarer as his work became even more serious.

On one of those rare calls, he found out that you took on a new interest. “Otome games”, or so they were called. He had little knowledge about it other than knowing that it was a type of dating simulation.

He had no issues with you and your new obsession after all, it’s just a game, and you were having fun!

Or so he thought until your love with these otome games became a little too much to the point of interfering with HIS love life. Why is his cuddle time with you being taken away by some- chunk of hot pixels? Instead of your hands wrapping around his waist, they now held your phone as you giggled at that….undeniable hot chunk of pixels. (According to you, it looked a lot like him and had a similar vibe)

You even had alarms set for your daily activities for these games, which had you scrambling for your phone; all the time. Your eyes would light up at whatever dialogues your "husbando" would say. 

Internally he would be screaming; "WHY WON'T YOU LOOK AT ME THE WAY YOU LOOK AT THOSE DARN 2D MEN"

Enough was enough! Dan Heng realised that at this rate, he would be ousted from being your boyfriend by a fictional character!

 Soon enough, that's how you found yourself on the floor, with Dan Heng behind you, caging you between his arms. 

Dan Heng grumbled, "It's my turn now. Pay attention to me," while avoiding direct eye contact with you.

"Oh no, have I made my boyfriend feel neglected? I'm sorry babe!" You turned to give a reassuring pat on his head, then jokingly added, "Though I suppose... You will need to learn how to share me from now on."

You receive a smack on the head at that

Jing Yuan 

Lately, he had noticed a hype around Luofu, which he soon found out, thanks to Yanqing. According to the young boy, certain “otome games” were becoming quite popular amongst the newer generation. Something about conversing with “hot 2D men with crazy backstories” made them feel “ooh la la”. Or something along those lines, Yanqing’s exact words, not his. 

“It’s actually super fun! Would you like to play as well? You get daily 5 tickets in a day, so it keeps you on your toes. And if I'm not wrong, there's even a character who resembles you, general!”

Jing Yuan declined and suggested the young lad seek someone else for his otome games, as he deemed himself too old and out of touch for such interests. He glanced up from his paperwork to find the boy giving him a disappointed look before quickly running off.

A few days after that incident, you had also fallen prey to these games, he figured as Jing Yuan listened to you talk excitedly about a "mysterious therapist with silver hair" from a newly released game, and how the character was both sweet and suspicious.

He was glad that you were enjoying yourself. Sometimes, it can be challenging to discover new interests as we grow older. At least, that was how Jing Yuan personally felt. 

As long as no harm was done, all is good!

Harm was indeed done. A lot in fact

He eventually discovered that these "ikemen" characters on your phone were taking his rightful place as your boyfriend. 

You no longer played with his hair or let him sleep on your lap… All these activities were taken away from him as if snatching candy from a baby.

It had only been a week into your... newfound obsession. You even bought a bunch of “Visual Novels” and spent many hours holed up in your room, and staying awake late into the night.

When he got concerened as asked for you to come to bed, all he'd get was: "Just five more minutes Jun-Jun! I need to complete this chapter, I swear I'll be there in five minutes, trust me."

Hmmm, nope, trust shattered and heart also shattered. Poor Jun-Jun.

It really made him feel sad, Jing Yuan’s signature :3 face soon turned :( which everyone noticed, it was hard not to. Even you thought his new behaviour to be strange and confronted him.

“My dear, I don’t mind you having hobbies, but please, give equal love and attention to your partner and not just those fictional “silver haired therapist” of yours.” Jing Yuan pleaded you with those puppy dog eyes.

“You should have said so from the beginning! I’ll tone my playing down a little. I didn’t mean to make you feel lonely…” You felt guilty and gave him a big warm hug, much to Jing Yuan’s pleasure.

“....How about a compromise?Let's both play these games together. Pretty please? At least once? You won't regret it! We can add each other as friends.”

He gave in. 

And now he’s obsessed with it.

Much more than you. 

honkai star rail taglist: none at the moment, but if you're interested, I can make one!

#hsr x reader #honkai star rail #dan heng #dan heng x reader #jing yuan #jing yuan x reader #star rail #honkai star rail x reader #dan heng x y/n #jing yuan x y/n #jing yuan x you #dan heng x you #hsr #tani writes!!

[sebfreak]

Tbh I´m a little bit sad that they didn´t add this tiny little scene into the anime while Maomao was talking with Jinshi and explaining to him how she sees her bilogical father. Because this scene was for me very interesting. Maomao as a child or more like from her point of view saw things differently and it was indeed traumatizing when Lakan came to her and said to her she should call him dad. (also i just wanted to see how grandma was hitting him sorry not sorry XD but come on this was funny in the manga okay? but maybe they didn´t add because in the episode before that grandma hit him. but hmm... if you read the manga you´ll know what i mean.) But okay, I think without it they managed to give all people the answer to their question why she dislikes her biological father. And although Gaoshun said that "no father wants to be disliked", I think it´s only up to Maomao whether she accepts him or not. The same goes for her mother too. Oh I really liked btw how she pointed out that her mother could have taken contraceptives but she didn´t chose to and so the strategist was tricked in the end. "Women are scary" yeah I mean... Maomao knows indeed a lot and did see a lot of characters in the red light district so she has every right to say it like that. But yeah getting kids can either save the woman or punish her. I know it sounds very rough if i say it like that, but this is the life they have.

Her dancing was indeed very beautiful she kept her promise although the person couldn´t see it. But at least Jinshi saw it. ahaha loved their interaction so much and him freaking out because of her wound is the best. XD Jinshi has the best faces ngl.

XDDD Ahahaha the scene was indeed very misleading ... right? RIGHT???? I have to be honest, even I was holding my breath but nonononono she just wants to have the ox bezoar. :D (at the moment *cough* but that´s another story). Also can we please highlight the fact that Jinshi just jumped down the wall AND WITH MAOMAO??? Boy he has legs out of steel, because the wall is very high. Oo

Yeah you can say the story had happy endings and everything went pretty well but it is indeed only the beginning of Maomaos story and I´m so glad that they announced season 2. <3

And how would I rate it? I would give it a 10/10 because i never felt bored nor was there something I really didn´t like. Yeah I´m critical when it comes to Lakan and Mamomaos mother and i will continue with it and a few other characters, but that didn´t change my rating for the anime. It´s a great story and I´m happy that they made 20+ episodes. I will recommend this story to everyone who likes these type of stories and I really like how this story shows in an authentical way how the life in a palace was or how courtesans lived their life. It´s not romanticized and beside that you can learn a lot about medicine because Maomaos passion for it can and will infect you. She is btw for me one of the best female characters out there. I like her personality and how she solves things. I like how she is true to her opinion and isn´t afraid to say it or share her ideas with others. For me she is a very strong character.

Oh and Jinshi is also a great character and on my husbando list. :D

#kusuriya no hitorigoto #the apothecary diaries #anime #jinshi #maomao #10/10 would recommend

[yuri-is-online]

Just realized that Rollo is in fact rated higher on that husbando tierlist than Malleus ADSJKFLFERTY

#twisted wonderland #if you just look at the twst guys who made the list #it's malleus (89) idia (76) leona (57) rollo (50) trey (44) ace (41) #and fucking fellow honest at (39) #floyd technically topped the list back when octavinelle released i think? i know he beat gojo which made a lot of people laugh

[2dboisloyal-devotee]

i decide to post something and as my first post, it's about my first husbando.

>)~ONESHOT

This Wish I Hold (Yandere Toshiro Hitsugaya x GN reader)

Please make sure you're at least 16+ and proceed with caution, well the yandere jazz and all that is more apparent in the end anyway

Warning: fluff, manipulative behaviors, angst, reader's death

Momo Hinamori; the name of your savior from a dire situation and since then you had been trying to return the favor. By becoming good friends, you got along well with her.

It wasn't long around that time too when she brought you two together. Despite Momo calling him cheerfully in a nickname of 'Shiro', you met the renowned child prodigy, otherwise known with the 'cold as ice' alias.

White short spiked hair and a sharp turqoise eyes complement his striking appearance all the more besides just looking like a literal child. He narrowed his eyes. “...Captain Hitsugaya from the 10th division of Gotei 13. Nice to meet you.” The way he brought upon himself in a levelheaded manner made you quickly mutter an apology before introducing yourself....to which he just nodded at.

He soon excused himself, bringing Momo to block his way. “Geez, Shiro! That's not how you treat my friend!”He sighed. “What more do you want, Hinamori...? I'm busy already right now and it's not helping at all since I'm also doing the job she's supposed to do!” While he grumbled about someone named Matsumoto, you realized you would try to be good friends with him too as you thought it would be proper since he was a childhood friend with Momo, along with some other reasons rooted from curiousity.

And what better way to do that than helping with what was he frustrated about?

At first, Momo was a bit hesitant leaving the two of you alone because you just knew each other but after hearing your reassurance, she then left to take care of her business from Aizen. Arriving in his office, you were told not to be trusted on managing the important documents. He simply reasoned that he didn't want to have more incoming headache from it.

So you just stood there while thinking what could you possibly do before suggesting to buy his favorite drink to cool off or considering his instruction to do something about his useless lieutenant.

“Just do as you like without causing trouble,” he ordered sternly. His eyes were now focusing on the paperwork with furrowed eyebrows as if they were already a permanent part of his expression. So you followed what he said, getting to know many more people along the way and being friends with them. That still included you getting closer with Momo and Captain Hitsugaya.

You spent many breaks with them by eating lunch or snacks together, being told many stories from Momo about their childhood including the embarrasing parts which Captain Hitsugaya liked to get worked up over.

There was a tiny difference you noticed too. After gradually having spent time with them, Captain Hitsugaya's anger was only a flustered one most of the time. And that one was more warm to witness than his usual serious demeanor.

You were tidying up the paperwork on his table to a neat stack while he was stretching and you affirmed at the same time. “You're actually quite a warm person huh, Captain.”

He fell down along with his chair. “WHAt—”

“Uh sh—... Sorry, Captain. Are you alright?” Your hand was outstretching, but he already stood up so fast without sparing a moment to let you see the scene longer.

“I'm! Of course I am! That was because—and, what were you thinking, huh!? Saying something like...” He glared while blushing more apparent. Then he cleared his throat. “At any rate, that was rude to a Captain so don't say stupid things like that again.”

Whether he heard your explanation that you just wanted to say the truth as a praise or appreciation, he still turned around and replied. “Fine, I'll only let this one slide. And... Thank you.”

Momo often says Captain should change the way he acts around people because he could be rude sometimes, but you thought that he was fine as he was. Though, maybe you would save those words for another time as he seemed already agitated enough just by walking near you.

As days passed, you had to watch out for the right situation and even asked for permission if it was okay for you to say some stupid things like before. “Just say what you want. And you don't need to always say that, I won't let your words bother me that much anyway.”

It was becoming a fun routine for you and possibly him, judging by the subtle smiles you catched upon his relaxing face from time to time.

He was willing to loosen his creased eyebrows and smile even if that meant Matsumoto also got the chance to saw it herself then teased him for it, added with Momo who tried to play a matchmaker. He had tried not to let it show in public but failed many times and instead gave punishments of adding work to whoever teased him or you.

Bit by bit from fun to a fulfilling routine, you adapted quite pleasantly. It was overall rewarding. The Captain trusted you on many jobs. Yet he still managed to be considerate in his own way by taking breaks together every so often. It became a fact that he was getting more comfortable in your presence with how often he rested his head on your shoulder or lap and fell asleep.

Although because of the work schedule becoming busier, you had less time to meet Momo and even Captain Hitsugaya needed to remind you to rest. One time, your body still ended taking a toll so he stayed by your side almost the whole day. After few scoldings, he had taken care of you until you were back in good health. “Don't fall ill again, at least for a while... I don't enjoy seeing you like that.” He sighed.

It seemed like you couldn't fulfill those words. You got carried away and was too nonchalant of the world that could be in danger anytime.

Laying down on his lap, you coughed and came along a sharp pain in your chest as you tried to breath. “...will you end my suffering, Captain...?” Your trembling hand reached to his cheek with a pained smile.

“Stop.” He gritted his teeth. Toshiro knew that he would not be as capable as you said once you die. He wouldn't be able to forgive himself.

A ragged breath was let out from you before a choked gasp for the ache you felt. You spoke again. “..plea..se? I know, only you can numb the pain... Even thou—..gh you, such warm, person...” Toshiro quickly clutched your outstretched hand with a firm grasp as he voiced his rejection. “I refuse, and please, stop talking, (Y/n)! This isn't the time for ... Just—hang in there!!”

Deep down he knew that there wasn't any choice he could do anymore even after going through all sort of methods, left only a last resort for who knew how long. You were the one who gave those words a meaning and warmth to make him thought he was actually a warm person even after he had gone used to those ignorant rumors of him. He was in fact fine with you to be the one whom melted the guard he had built up like a chilling, rigid ice for years.

You should have taken responsibilities for making him feel this way. “Sor..ry.. honestly... I, want it to be, you..  who end..s it, please. Don't let it... end this way..” you responded. Your energy had been sapped away to every words and effort trying to keep your grip, then your eyes drooped...

At that second, your moment had become frozen in time. None other than in the eternally graceful ice he made himself, despite your words and self had gone cold. Finally he could do it using the reason you wished yourself. He will do anything it takes to have you keep your words true again.

He makes sure that you'll return.

#yandere x reader #yandere bleach #narawritechances #yandere toshiro hitsugaya #yandere oneshot #yandere bleach x reader #yandere hitsugaya toshiro #yandere toshiro hitsugaya x reader #yandere angst #nara.yanhwehepost

[kurim-chis]

(HMMMM my secret DanMarch ship feelings tingled a bit ngl)

For one single heartstopping moment, i thought I had lost the 50/50, but i won! Although he came in almost 90 pulls.

So far I have won the 50/50s in Jing Yuan, Blade and IL Dan Heng’s banners!! What luck.

Following this, I might spend a few pulls on Fu Xuan just to get Lynx (and hey idm if I get Fu Xuan) and also because the Fu Xuan and Jing Yuan pairing is one of the few I like :3 She’s also cute and smol. However, I probably will go for like 30 pulls in her banner and stop.

And other than Fu Xuan, I REALLY am not interested in any of the following characters. So I will most likely be abstaining after Fu Xian’s banner and saving up for the next husbando.

Extra:

IT’S NOT EVEN SUSHANG’S RATE UP LEAVE ME ALONE BAJSKFMKENDIEN

#honkai star rail #hsr #dan heng #mentions of #danmarch #jingfu #imbibitor lunae #although there are rumors that hoyo will be putting reruns but i don’t trust those #if there are though #i will probably try to get Silver Wolf #amidst all the waiting for the next husbando #NO HUSBANDO FOR AT LEAST 4 BANNERS! #that’s enough for me to save enough for hard pity and one soft pity and perhaps more #especially since i left a LOT of messages and quests undone lmao #btw i wanted more eidolons for yu kong but i got NOTHING

[thatmotorfreak]

Spoilers for WOTFI '23 under the cut.

I think I just found my new deranged SMG4 husbando <3

Might turn in my carboard box head for a TV head at this rate.

#smg4 #glitch productions

[living-in-the-state-of-dreaming]

Tsubaki appreciation post.

This man is so heavily under rated in terms of being a husbando, a yandere or just a character in general that I cannot verbally express how much it pains me. HE'S UNHINGED; a dom that you would NEVER suspect at first glance- I MEAN HE LITERALLY STEPS ON FREAKING KURO his older brother and the strongest among them and IS THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN KILL A SERVAMP. Let alone the fact that this man weilds a KATANA as his weapon! And that's not even STARTING on how he would literally be SO FREAKING DOTING WITH HIS S/O! Or the fact that he's also a sweet dork sometimes who just likes spending time with those he considers his family and those who are precious to him. This man just deserves all the hugs and WAY more attention and yet it just feels like...He's just been left on the wayside. Also again!

And this! D//////x

Like come o n n n.

#thoughts of a dreamer #living in the state of dreaming #Tsubaki #Who Is Coming #Servamp