#i am Not Quite Good At Social

[haarute]

italian style. specifically naples.

#jolyne cujoh #jojo's bizarre adventure #stone ocean #jjba #jojo #illustration #digital art #featuring my favorite jolyne color palette from the BEST manga cover #for the love of god open at 100% resolution. it is a imperative for my artstyle to have no resizing #and so i am cursed forever when it comes to posting on social media. #i am QUITE HAPPY with this tbh. it started as just me fucking around but the result is honestly pretty good!! #does this count as a manga redraw? that wasn't my intention but i guess it kind of ends up looking like one. oh well. #my art

[startrekin-it]

Woke up last night with two hypos that i barely had the brain activity to fix, and i no longer own Jelly Babies. Desperately hoping we don’t have a repeat performance

#i am at my limit #diabetes #im so fog brained and miserable rn #just gotta do my dissertation and then i can think about being a normale person who interacts with people again #i feel like I am rotting interally right now #i dont care about my degree #i dont care about an awful lot at the moment in terms of my own wellbeing outside of the diabetes #im quite frankly failing at socially interacting regularly enough that im going to start crying about it #and all in all i would say i am not having a good time rn #but on the PLUS side i have a job now #job = more dr pepper to cope 🙏

[realmermaid333]

Sometimes being autistic kinda sucks because I am ahead of my peers in the ways they are behind, and I am behind my peers in the ways they are ahead.

Most people my age are pro-drivers with job experience, dating experience, are already in college, and have larger friend groups. I am behind on these things.

But I have always been very mature and logical for my age. While also being "socially off putting" (i put it in quotes because really it's just that lots of neurotypical ppl are judgmental and kinda boring I'm sorry. I'm only talking about the mean ones). I struggle to make friends my age because we tend to not line up when it comes to emotional maturity. But I do get along with people near their mid 20s-ish. But because unemployed for time being, I am not where the mid-20s homies are

So add all of that together and you get;

Has one irl friend 💔

#autism #autistic #actually autistic #autistic experiences #late diagnosed autistic #cant wait to meet people and make friends though #I am so touch starved #and social starved #when I finally get fucking hired someone csuse holy shit no one is hiring #I think I might explode tbh #like how am I gonna deal with all that stimulation? idk #I think I'll be okay though i am good at stimming in public now #and I am quite social

[wheatormeat]

I'm sorry to the anon who messaged me about ace attorney, I think I lost your ask ;-;

To summarize it, I've had a lot more internet people interact with me lately because of the silly lawyer simulator. And while I'm very glad people are finding my art through it, I don't always have the heart to tell them that I haven't even finished the original trilogy.... so my knowledge is quite slim. I also don't typically come on tumblr to message people, so I can't really promise I would respond to dms about ace attorney; but I really appreciate you sending an ask anyway. Here's a doodle of Nick and Maya I dug up.

#wheat answers #im tagging it as that anyway #anonymous #i will say as someone who's only really been in smaller fandoms recently I am used to /starving/ for content #so the amount of presence aa has is quite overwhelming sometimes #btwn this and dungeon meshi anime I feel like im being fireblasted with my silly interests haha #(both a good and bad thing) idk i really hate social media sometimes

[athrisen]

Sijihua Zine has been shipped out so this can finally see the light of day! It was fun working with all the talented folks on this, thanks for having me @shlzine~

I wanted to draw the 100 year old virgin grandpa (and his (dead) beau Rong Changqing) because I've already done the main lovebirds and mr. daddy-issues. Wow, this old boy really knows how to carry a torch, pining after a dead married dude for all those long lonely years atop a snowy mountain... all alone... he needs all the love he can get man

This is so sad, Alexa play despacito

Instagram | Twitter

#山河令 #叶白衣 #shlzine #shl #word of honor #woh #yby #rong changqing #容叶 #thanks for having me! #it was fun! #oh yea Yby is having a drink and hallucinating? imagining? RCQ and the good old days #that's why RCQ is transparent under the sun #athillust #athshl #uh I am quite inactive on socials I'm sorry

[jorvikzelda]

I started reading Lord of the Rings (bought Fellowship of the Ring like… last spring but never got around to starting) and I’d just like to say. Holy fuck what a slow book. You mean to tell me I’m over a hundred pages in and this man is only just leaving the Shire? Sign me up for MORE I love this shit. Tolkien said “I will take exactly as much time as I want to describe things and you will like it”. AND I DO

#i can already tell this is the sort of thing that’s going to be so good I’ll never recover from it #I’ve watched the movies like casually-in-the-background a couple times so I know the approximate plot #(they often run on TV somewhere around Christmas and New Year’s in Sweden so they’ve been on more than twice) #but there’s so much detail here that’s just… missed out on… in the films #Or I forgot about it lmfao #Either way loving the book detail #And also reading a book for the first time in months i told my mom id been reading today and she was like YOURE READING?! #It’s part of my social media healing process. Forcing me to like… sit down and take shit in #Used to DEVOUR books when I was younger #Just Kinda Stopped at some point (much like every other former gifted kid) #But it’s a well missed moment of escapism and calm and centering myself. meditative almost #I find lotr to be good also because it’s like… a little heavy. You can read a chapter and then sit with it for a little while #Im not quite reaching the heavy cliffhangers yet either #Each chapter feels pretty concluded #It’s a healthier reading method I feel than the ‘devour in one night then don’t read for 6 months’ thing I did in high school #the few times i DID sit down to read a book #God damn those are some long tags #z talks #not horse game #I feel so late to the party because I always see all these people enjoying lotr ;-; its so established and here am i…. #but alas

[glasscupthingie]

Holy shit. Aziraphale's an unreliable narrator and was probably threatened by the Metatron.

Just hear me out.

What really struck me during my latest rewatch is how bloody awful they are at communicating. Through the whole season.

Crowley finds out that helping Gabriel will be punished by being removed from the book of life - doesn't tell Aziraphale.

When asked about the trip back from Scotland, Azi does not tell Crowley about being visited by Shax.

Crowley never tells Aziraphale that he visited heaven and found out a lot of things. Here amongst that not going along with Armageddon 2.0 is why Gabriel ended up with no memory. Which seems pretty relevant now that Aziraphale is replacing Gabriel.

And of course there is all the unsaid stuff during the final 15 but that is not important right now tbh.

So... Aziraphale is an unreliable narrator. We know that he and crowley just... doesn't tell each other important stuff.

I saw some post with a theory about Give me Coffee or give me death and how the Megatrash probably gave Aziraphale the ultimatum between going to heaven or having Crowley ereased from the book of life. And honestly it would make so much bloody sense if the Murdertron threatened Aziraphale in some way or other.

This is the exact kind of thing that we see through the season that Aziraphale and Crowley do not share with each other. And that would explain why Aziraphale changed his mind so suddenly. And the choice to show us the scenes with Azi and the Megadumb through the narration of Aziraphale.

#ofc aziraphale also wants to do good and save heaven and earth and shit #but he started saying no and thereafter changed his mind quite suddenly #i'm so terribly sorry that I don't know how to reference the give me death or give me coffee post but I'm so bad at social media #but the post was really good so go find it #also I hope I haven't plagirazed too much from that post #I honestly don't remember the details I am too deep in the good omens tag #which reminds me #good omens #good omens season two #good omens season 2 #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #the megadumbtron

[theygender]

I may be considering the crime of... Getting a business degree 🤢

#i Like my new job where i get to play in excel all day and i also like having financial security for the first time in my adult life #i was originally thinking about switching my major to sociology bc its another area that im interested in #but my mom may have talked me into considering a business degree as an option since sociology isnt a great fallback option... #the thought of majoring in business makes me gag tbh. but i mean... i DO like data analysis and there IS a masters for data analysis #and the bachelors degree in information systems would teach me new things about computers which might be cool #and they have an international business program that links in advanced study of foreign languages and cultures #and theres even a certificate program for sustainability that includes direct work with grassroots programs #AND all of this is intentionally made to be accessible to people who are already in the work field so i wouldnt need to quit my job... #...all of this plus a sociology minor (or double major if i can pull it off) is starting to look pretty good actually #BUT... can i withstand the pain of spending the next few years in classrooms full of business majors 🤔 #real talk tho i was wanting to use my social work degree to go into policy anyways which could mean government OR corporate #...if i get a business major i could potentially speedrun the process of getting into corporate policy to make a difference that way #and my sociology minor (or major) would still support that #fuckin. trojan horse the companies i guess #i am rotating the idea in my mind with the emotional state of that gif of someone trying kombucha for the first time #rambling

[here-there-were-dragons]

as a general rule, on average, if americans consistently complain about a food being conceptually weird, gross, and scary, then it probably tastes amazing. or at least inoffensive.

this is because in my experience americans for the most part (give or take a few exceptions by region) think eating literally anything other than beef, chicken, bread, eggs, peanut butter jelly sandwitches, ketchup, and disgusting cloyingly artificial brown sludge soda is insurmountably weird, gross, and scary.

#a lot of people literally refuse to even eat ham or pork #not even for like religious or health reasons #just because they think eating anything but beef and chicken is 'weird and scary and gross' #every time i hear people going on en masse about how 'weird and an acquired taste' something foreign is i go and try it and i'm just like #what the fuck were all of you smoking. where is the unbearable weirdness i am supposed to be experiencing #shoutout to that time i kept hearing about how bizarre a flavor milkis soda is and how intimidating and acquired of a taste #then when i actually try the stuff. it's just fucking peach soda. it's peach soda with a faint tangy yogurtish taste. it makes good floats. #how in the absolute fuck is anything even remotely weird much less gross about this? #unless your concept of what a 'soda' should be is poisoned by a lifetime of the entire soda aisle being filled with nothing but brown sludg #from the same 3 brands that all taste like what would happen if they could distill the concept of diabetes and artificial flavoring syrup #i don't know if other countries have this but there's this weird cultural like mandatory rejection of any 'unusual' food here #way more intense than i've seen from anyone from any other country (though that might just be inexperience with other cultures talking) #people react to the mere suggestion of any food outside a very narrow range with outright disgust and genuine fear and horror #and there's a huge amount of unspoken peer pressure on everyone to also do the same #like you're expected to agree with them and you've breeched some sort of silent social contract if you don't #it's seen as *immoral* almost it feels like #it's difficult to describe unless you've noticed it yourself #americans react to the mere suggestion of eating anything outside of the same 2 meats and handful of fillers the same way #that pearl-clutching aristocrat grandmas react to hearing that people in foreign countries do.. basically anything #it doesnt matter if you're suggesting eating ube cake or suggesting eating live bugs because people will react the same way #everything that's not chicken/beef/ect is as good as bugs to people here #hate this stupid blandass country and how impossible it is to afford any food other than burgers if you're not rich #or blessed with relatives that have any idea how to cook and are at all willing to teach you #cause nother weird thing i've noticed about food culture-or at least wasp food culture-that i haven't seen anywhere else quite the same way #is that if you DO have any relatives that know how to cook then nine times out of ten they will jealously guard their recipes like a dragon #and refuse to share them with anyone #thus taking whatever little cooking knowledge was in the family to their grave #so the opportunity other people usually have for family bonding via passing on recipes? pffft no. #for some reason we seem to actively go out of our way to prevent these things from being passed on #i don't know what the fuck is up with that but i suspect it has something to do with 50's dinner party oneupmanship

[mercymaker]

chilling vibing getting stuff done and then suddenly getting hit by 'why do you try so hard to make something new and good and bend yourself backwards pushing for quality when that stuff is mostly discouraged and low effort quantity-over-quality stuff is constantly rewarded'

#life #was on a high after writing quite a bit today #but now feel like a deflating balloon lmao #like yeah nah yeah i've worked with social media enough to know that you have to play 'their' game in order to 'succeed' #but that whole premise is so soulless and yet #it's the shit paradox that most often the less time and effort you put into something the more likely it will do good online #but with constantly diminishing returns it can get pretty tough #like the pattern is there it's all in motion #and it's just gonna get worse and worse and worse #people barely reblog anymore barely comment #i started posting my writing because i thought 'well at least one person might like it!' #like... i cannot NOT write it's just who i am #but even with the folders full of personal writing and whatnot at some point i stopped #because writing is just incredibly lonely and it was starting to make me feel worse about it so i stopped #but yeah nah fam #i'm just fully in the period shits and getting emotional #but the ongoing decline of engagement and communication is just sad to see #like even artists around me who are incredibly talented i see them barely get any notes and if they do it's pretty much all likes #shit's depressing fam #and then on top of that we have people stealing shit from us #like that fucking guy who copied every bg3 creator's ideas and then started playing victim when called out #what was up with that lmao

[elainemorisi]

still thinking about how I and the cishet dad from my kid's school established that we were Of The Same (deeply skeptical) Opinions about said school by first establishing that we were on the same side of the incredibly unclassy lesbian drama that literally everyone knows about, and how this was a 100% accurate litmus test

#it's so unclassy #I am quite morally neutral on adultery #but I am not remotely 'that reflects very poorly on your taste tact decency and judgement' neutral on adultery #and given that this place is apparently run on Weaponized Therapy FeeFees instead of y'know normal professional standards #the fact that the two Exploders Of Marriages are central to the weird incestuous social circle that runs the place #despite both being literally just parents not employees not board members #their mind bogglingly bad behavior is regrettably not directly but not un- related to the Whole Deal #anyway gossip is useful and good number 37346 :P #he's exactly as exasperated and unconvinced by the bullshit

[widevibratobitch]

.

#coming to tumblr for the first time in three days just to bitch because i feel like shit <333 #sorry if i havent responded to your message i will as soon as i get a grip but rn im just too busy #both with uni and with crying because a friend said a mean thing to me lol #and because im tired of this new friendship already and tired of hearing this girl talking how great she is lol #am i jealous? fuck yeah i am. #and it's not like she's mean like straight up. cause like. #when i say im really considering quitting and dropping out she tries to encourage me ig #but then she follows it up with 'ofc *I* never had a problem with this and that because it always just came naturally to me teehee #but yknow. dont give up uwu' #and she keeps sending me recordings of her singing to tell her how good she is and always tells me how her teacher praises her #and like. its cool. like i get it that its a nice feeling when you do something well and wanna share that joy with a friend #but idk. i just think its kinda. well not mean but a litt #*a little tone deaf? when ive just been telling her that im in a Bad Place rn and my voice isnt working as it should #and my pianist is bullying me and i end up crying on almost every lesson #and she hits me with a 'damn that sucks fuck that pianist dont give up tho <3 #now do you wanna listen to me sing bel raggio lusinghier like a pro and my professor telling me i am sublime?' #also when i tell her that im sorry that im not very social and i just cannot stay and chat cause im having a horrible day today #and really dont feel well and she's like 'yeah i havent noticed anything you're always like that... *side eye*' in a way that suggests #im a horrible friend cause im not talking with her enough and yet again im disappointing her (aint that familiar lol) #i just. idk. the last two-three weeks have been absolutely horrible to me. i cant get out of bed i havent done a single colorful make up #in so long ive basically forgotten how to do that. and i loved doing fun make up looks that make people tell me i look like a clown. #but i just dont have the energy to do anything more than put on a random tshirt and spray dry shampoo on my unwashed hair #i dont even wear my rings anymore. ive stopped caring about being the pinkest slayest queerest looking bitch in the room cause i just. cant #and even some casual friend of mine asked me yesterday if im okay cause they can see something is Not Right. but SHE not only doesnt notice #anything. i have a feeling she feels like im disappoing and neglecting her because i cant be bothered to text with her 24/7 #like idk. maybe its just my imagination but i barely even feel like an actual person. more like just a homunculus made to trail after her #and listen to her bragging about how pretty/talented/unbothered she is #oh and also for her to keep dissing m/ozart lol like idk why it hurts me so bad but then ig its not that unusual to feel shitty #when someone keeps talking shit about something you really love and are passionate about and making you feel like an idiot #because you like it. because its stupid and boring and you're a simpleton for enjoying it instead of liking sth more 'ambitious'

[emodennis]

just got an interview for a job i applied to 5 months ago??? you know what i'll take it

#luckily i am still looking for a job #because the cats... they've been mean lately. and now i am Scared. and want to quit #this job is a 'peer partner' at a drop in center for youth its kinda what i was looking for?? just like leading groups and activities?? #man it would be cool to work with people again. the cats are not good enough social interaction kajshdkajh #the last interview i fucking bombed tho and this hiring manager wants to talk to me this week!!! aaahhhhh #what am i gonna SAY #phoenix talks

[suncaptor]

I love posts on tumblr complaining about people's social skills being delayed on a site that seems to have a huge percentage of neurodivergent people. like what did you think the autistic people just wanted to talk about their medias and wouldn't have *checks notes* a social neurodevelopmental disorder.

#incoherents #like i do agree that the pandemic has also GREATLY impacted peoples social development and getting out into the real world more will help #but you can be around people who have social issues and be like you guys need to improve your social issues youre acting like children #thats not really your place:/ just be clear if someones hurting you. #this isnt even a personal thing im just being pissed off #i am an adult who has spent time living in hostels around strangers and I'm quite good at making connections that way. #but fr come on ...

[causticsunshine]

.

#might have just lost all my ipad data…. all my refs and art files…. #i was literally working on the cutest piece when it locked me out and my password wasn’t working #i’m on recovery mode rn praying it didn’t wipe everything but i am not a lucky man most of the time :( #sucks enough to lose most all my references but god my art files too? #that’ll be all the unfinished 1d pieces i loved and was saving for a big wip dump gone…. #all my old commission pieces…. my merch designs… my photo studies and digital sketchbook pages…. #and my super recent pieces i was really proud of all gone :( #praying my art files are at least partially okay…. even if i lose my ref i can find a lot of saved on my socials #but god losing all those files is going to destroy me a little #especially because i’ve been in a good art mood for the first time in quite a while #hoping wishing praying etc everything will be fine!!

[hella1975]

happy eurovison!! do your stretches!!!

babe it's been days since i did my stretches at this point im too scared

#in my defence idk WHAT was going on with my sunday shift bc i only waitressed 7 hours and that's a pretty normal shift for me #like im aware compared to a normal person it would be very difficult to just out of nowhere expect them to be on their feet #walking back and forth the entire length of a restaurant regularly carrying heavy things all the while keeping up ABOVE AND BEYOND socially #for SEVEN ENTIRE HOURS with ZERO BREAK like masking that entire time on top of the 7 hour physical workout #like it's insane if u think about it for more than 2 seconds and im really trying to bc every time i falter i beat the shit out of myself #and like? NO? my job is actually very physically demanding and emotionally draining compared to most people's day-to-day activity #it's gonna have impacts sometimes! #so yeah long story short i finished my shift sunday and when i tell you my legs LOCKED UP in bed that night #like mainly my thighs but it was all in my hips and knees and it was so bad that i lay there until 2am before getting painkillers #bc i couldnt hack it #which is SAYING SOMETHING for me bc im normally both quite good with pain and also a hardass for taking painkillers #ive had that happen once before (again after waitressing lol) & never worried about it but my mum recently got diagnosed with arthritis #and ever since ive been like. Looking at my own joints any time they even HINT at playing up #like i am RENOWNED for inhereting all of my mum's medical shit from mental to physical like i KNOW i'll get it it's just a matter of when #and yeah that was sunday it's now tuesday and my thighs STILL feel bruised #and im like. embarassed about it bc it's not like i did anything spectacular? and idk why it's happening? #yeah idk hiiii rori did u like me ranting about my physical health in ur stretch reminder ask sorry do u still think im hot <3 #ask