#i kept mumbling this to myself trying to pronounce it haha | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

safetycar-restart · 1 year

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Gonna be writing in about ten minutes :))

that sounds like a threat haha

I just had an idea about sweet angel Mick and I have to get it off my chest: I'm in love with Mick and his voice. I think he just has the loveliest voice, and I noticed that sometimes it gets softer, I don't even know how to explain it! (I think you can notice it in the do you know me video from Haas)

so, when he's submitting to you he tends to speak in a softer voice than normal, almost like a combination of breathy and whiny. so the moment he gets more confident and starts trusting you as his Dom, he speaks up more often, and it's like music to your ears, that includes his whimpers and whines while you're taking him apart

but now one of my favorite subjects - little!Mick. I think his voice is a little more whiny and even sweeter, he has a harder time pronouncing things correctly because he's just a little german boy! and he tends to be so happy and excited when he gets to be around you! the best caretaker in the world! so his voice reflects that love and excitement, he doesn't focus on speaking clearly because he knows you're gonna do your best to understand him anyways

-🌻

Firstly, every time I write when I will be writing, it absolutely is a threat. Though I'm not sure if I'm threatening you guys or myself, but either way there will undoubtedly be violence. Anyway, lets talk about this cause youre so right about all of this! I'm assuming you meant in the d/s au, and I'm gonna write little!Mick in that AU as well cause I think it could be really cool. I am also officially dubbing 🌻 anon to be the Mick anon, you can write other stuff too but you will always be the Mick anon.

Firstly, Mick really does have the loveliest voice!! You hate how Haas made Mick feel like he shouldn't be able to speak up and express himself because his voice is just so sweet. Not only is his voice so sweet, but he also always says such nice things?

Mick never talks back, ever. All he wants is to be your good boy. As time goes on, he gets comfortable enough to make little jokes and comments in scenes. But it's never bratty. He just wants to see you smile.

Of course he speaks softer when you scene with him. At first he spoke in mumbles and whispers, so soft that you could barely hear him because he was so scared of saying wrong. But overtime he starts to feel more comfortable and begins to speak clearer.

However, he still never speaks at the same volume in scenes as he does outside of them. But you dont mind that at all, it shows that he just wants to be a little softer in scenes, a little quieter.

In fact, over time you start to notice the difference in his voice when he wants to submit? He'll turn to you and speak softer, a slight whine in his voice and then you realise what he needs. I also think that Mick hasn't realised he does this, and you make sure to never tell him because then he might try to cover it up.

Now for little!Mick...

Firstly I just wanna talk about little!Mick in the D/S AU for a second because I have many thoughts. I think that Mick would know that he was a little for years, but he kept that from his dom at Haas because he knew it would be ruined.

For Mick, littlespace is his safe space. He feels so nice when he can just play with his cars for a few hours and yes he desperately wants someone to take care of him, but he knew he couldn't tell his dom at Haas because they would find a way to make it unsafe for him.

But then he has you and you make him feel so safe? You never make fun of him EVER, and he always loves being with you. Originally, he promised himself that he wouldn't tell you about being a little either, but then he's cuddled up in bed with you and youre reading him a story because he was struggling to fall asleep and he can feel himself slipping and he gets so scared because you dont know.

Eventually he has to tell you, and he's fully convinced that youre going to hate him for it. You, of course, thank him over and over again for telling you, and tell him that you would love to meet little!Mick and help look after him if he's okay with that.

He slips later that day, because he can't stop thinking about how you offered to look after him and how he's so sure you would take such great care of him. You come into the living room after showering and Mick staring into space.

When you approach him, he looks at you with wide eyes and softly asks, "Will you play with me?"

And his voice!!! It's so soft and sweet, no hint of the whininess you hear when he needs to submit. You can hear he's nervous and excited, showing all his emotions in his voice and his face.

Of course you agree to play with him!!! He shows you where his toys are (it's literally just two very sad looking old cars and you immediately order him some new toys), and of course he wants to race!! Except, he wants to be teammates? He doesnt want to race against you, cause he refuses to do that. He wants only love and teamwork!!

So you work as teammates and he has so much fun.

After playing for a bit, he starts to come out of his shell and then he gets so excited!! He pronounces things a little off, using some German and French words as well but somehow you always understand what he wants.

Also, he start full on sobbing when you bring warm milk in a to go cup (he didnt have any sippy cups and you so you had to make do), cause he's never had a caregiver before and he's always been too scared to do it himself.

He's just so happy!!!

#d/s au #sub!mick #little!Mick #little!driver/rider #ms #gn!reader #🌻

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queenlists · 4 years

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hell’s heir

A/N: My laptop busted as soon as I made a post which is why I’ve been pretty inactive, but we are back and better than ever at 124. Thank you to everyone for the support and patience. I really appreciate it! If you have any requests, shoot them my way. I really hope this doesn’t happen ever again haha! I really hope you enjoy this fic that should’ve been up in February. Masterlist is at the bottom like always. Enjoy! ✌

Post Date: 03/16/2020

“I want you to stay!” Dean yelled from directly behind me, slamming the door shut with one hand before I could leave. Dean was so close that I could smell the beer spill into the air as he heaved. His body warm against mine. His heart thudding quickly. Tightening my hand around the suitcase handle, I sniffed up the tears that were threatening to fall. “Stay with us please, (Y/n). Just stay,” Dean whimpered. I shook my head before reaching for the doorknob. Dean grabbed my hand and twirled me around to face him, red in the face with tears in his eyes. “Why? Why can’t you wait until we’re back home again? I promise this is the last time!” Dean cried out, holding onto my hand tighter with every word. I tore my hand away from him “You both always say it’s the last hunt! You always say one more time. One more case. One more. It’s always one more, Dean! You both always say you hate the hunting life. I want better for us. All three of us! I’m giving you two an out, why can’t you take that?” “I promise you when we come back, it’s done. We’re done with this life and we can all live our apple pie life. Just this last time, okay? It’ll be a three-day case. Three days, I promise!” Sam promised, reaching out for my suitcase. “Sammy and I have all of the information already and we have leads. In and out then done! Please give us this last case,” Dean pleaded, tears escaping his eyes and falling down his face. Looking at the two clearly heartbroken boys, I sighed letting my tears flow down “Okay, one last case!” I hissed at the boys before pulling them both in for a hug.

“One last time!” Dean and Sam yelled back at me with a smile on their faces from Baby. I blew the brothers a kiss before waving Dean and Sam goodbye until Baby disappeared into the open road. “One last time, Winchesters,” I smiled to myself before going back inside.

“Pick up! How do three days turn into three weeks?” I screamed into the phone before hanging up to call right back for the tenth time. I called and called, screaming into the receiver each time until Dean and Sam’s voicemails were both full. This was not like them. I felt myself begin to break down as I lost my mind, thinking of the absolute worst situations. “Hello, darling!” I rolled my eyes as I heard the familiar voice. “What did you do to them, Crowley? If you or any of your little minions hurt them, I swear I will have to kill you all! ” my voice cracked as I felt my throat tighten. “Oh, come on now. That’s no way to speak to your father!” Crowley chuckled.

-----------

Crowley led me to where the boys were being kept. The demons staring at me, their eyes black as I passed them. I knew each and every one of them. I knew they were all disappointed in me for choosing the Winchesters over my father. Over them. Over my family, but I did what I had to do. What my heart told me to do.

"(Y/n)? Why are you summoning me? Any luck with those Winchesters?" My back turned to the demon, I hung my head low as tears fell down my face "Asher, tell my father that I'm not coming home. Tell him I'm not hurting those boys. Tell him I'm done!" With a wave of the hand, the demon was gone. My heart ached as I thought about my father’s reaction, regret seeping into my soul. My dad had always been there for me, but love always wins.

“I’m not like you,” I declared, refusing to look at my father. “Oh, really?” Crowley snickered. “I changed,” I sighed “They’re my friends,” I bit my lip as I felt tears prick my eyes. Even though his ways disgusted me, I love him. He’s my father after all. “I know, sweetheart. I figured you made friends when you turned your tracker off. May I say that I was not all that surprised when you sent that little message home to me. It wasn’t the fact that my child left the nest unexpectedly that hurt, but the betrayal hurt. You know just like I do that I could never hurt you, so you’re just going to have to hurt yourself.” I looked up at Crowley, knitting my eyebrows together with wonder as he led me into a dark, cold room. I could hear chains rattling as I heard muffled voices. Suddenly, the bright fluorescent lights hummed to life revealing Dean and Sam tied up with rope and duct tape covering their mouths. Dean and Sam both wiggled around, their voices getting louder as they realized it was me. Smiling, I began to run to them only to be grabbed by Crowley. The boys started to yell and rock themselves, trying to get loose. Their faces going red and the veins in their bodies pronouncing themselves. “Oh shut up! (Y/n) is fine,” Crowley yelled, sighing to himself. “They never shut up! They never stop fighting me! I’ve had them here for weeks and they still won’t stop. How do you deal with them? Especially that Dean!” Crowley spat, looking at Dean with disapproval in his eyes. “I don’t tie them up for starters,” I rolled my eyes at Crowley, shoving him away from me before running to the boys. I quickly took off the duct tape from their mouths but left them tied up, in fear of what they may do to me when they find out the truth.

“I was worried about you two! I left so many messages,” I smiled as the two brothers looked at each other without saying a word. My smile slowly faded away as they remained silent and simultaneously looked at me. “How did you know where we were?” Dean sniffled, looking down “Why are you so comfortable with Crowley and being in a warehouse full of demons?” I stared at Dean with my mouth wide open, not knowing what to say. Gulping, I looked to Sam who was clenching his jaw staring at me, his eyes filled to the brim with hurt. I tore my eyes from Sam’s to Crowley’s who was standing there with his arms crossed and a satisfied grin spread across his face as he watched his plan to destroy me unfold. I looked back to the boys who were both staring at me with red-rimmed eyes. “Tell me I’m wrong and you’re not one of them!” Sam cried out, sniffling. “Sam, I’m not like them!” I began to walk closer to Sam but stumbled back when Dean began to growl, rocking and wiggling himself. “Stay away from my brother!” Dean snapped at me, his face red and his eyes black with anger. “All this time? All this time, you lied to us? Pretending that you found us by chance? Pretending that you were lost and hurt?” Sam shook his head, tears sliding down his face. “No! It’s not like that.” I cried out as I tried to walk closer to them in hopes of calming them down, but was stopped by Crowley. “You’re just like them, aren’t you? We trusted you! We brought you back to the bunker, thinking we saved you. Little did we know, we fell for your trap,” Dean screamed at me. Sobbing, I sucked in air as I felt myself beginning to hyperventilate “N-no, it’s not like that!” Crowley pulled me into his chest as he stroked my hair and back. Closing my eyes, I cried into my father’s chest holding onto him for dear life.

Smirking as I saw the boys leave their hotel room and pack their bags into their car, I could not believe how easy these boys could be found. Cracking my knuckles and neck, I shook out all of my energy as I prepared to do my helpless damsel in distress skit. No one turns down a weeping defenseless person, now do they? "I need help!" I gasped out breathlessly, limping to the boys before holding onto Sam's arm tightly. "Hey! Are you okay?" Sam held me up as I went limp in his arms. Dean's eyes darted around, his face riddled with worry as he prepared to fight. "Let's take them to the bunker. They're out cold," Sam hoisted me onto his shoulder as he carried me to the car. Keeping my eyes closed, I heard the brothers going back and forth trying to figure out what they should do. "Make sure they're human, Sammy!" Before Sam could move, I jolted up coughing and shaking violently "W-where am I? Who are you?!" I yelled, looking wildly between Dean and Sam. "We're taking you to a safe place, okay? Just relax!" Dean looked back at me from the driver's seat, giving me a small sincere smile. Sitting back, I caught my breath and calmed myself down as I watched Sam put the test supplies away. I coughed back a laugh “Stupid boys” I muttered to myself, examining my freshly manicured nails.

“You weren’t sobbing when you were setting us up, were you?” Dean scoffed. “Enough!” Crowley’s voice boomed through the room “Do not yell at my child!” Everything went silent. The world seemed to stop. My heart dropped as I heard a nearly silent “Child?” come from Sam and a loud "Son of a bitch!" come from Dean. “This isn’t nearly as fun as I thought it’d be,” Crowley mumbled, holding me tighter. “Why dad? Why’d you have to do this?” I sniffled, feeling defeated as the tears kept flowing and my heart broke into even smaller pieces. “I wanted you home. The Winchesters can’t protect you. Not like I can,” Crowley’s voice cracked a little before he cleared his throat. I stayed silent, listening to my father choke on his words for the first time. “They fed me, clothed me, and provided me with everything I needed and wanted without a second thought. They never asked for anything in return. They offered me the world with a smile. I tried, daddy, I did. I really did. I tried to kill them, but I just...I just couldn't,"

This week was fun, but I had to complete this mission. I was always done within twenty four hours, but the Winchesters weren’t the monsters they were painted out to be. Yes, they killed a lot of my friends but they were gentle behind the scenes. I could just call my dad over. I could just put my tracker back on, but the only right way to do this is to do it myself. If anyone was going to kill them, it was going to be me. Quick and as painless as possible. Wrapping my fingers around the gun with a finger on the trigger, I aimed at the sleeping boys. My heart thudding in my chest as my brain screamed for me to stop. Waves of remorse and sadness crashed over me as my hands began to shake. At that moment, I couldn’t imagine my life without them. At that moment, I couldn’t see myself living past this point if I were to kill them. At that moment, I realized I felt love and nothing but love for them. Dropping my arm, I let out a gasp of air that I didn’t even know I was holding. Tears clouded my vision as I looked up once again at the two sleeping boys who took me in, took care of me, and showed me love from the very start. “I can’t do this!” I shook my head, running out of the room.

"Will you give them a chance? If they even forgive me,” I whimpered, looking up at my father’s watery eyes. Crowley nodded, giving me a kiss on the forehead.

Taking a deep breath, I turned from my father to Dean and Sam showing them my demon form. Tears flowing from Sam’s eyes as he shook his head in disbelief. Dean stared at me with cold and disapproving eyes, clenching his jaw. “I’m still me. I didn’t force my way into a meat suit. This is all me! I was sent to kill you both, but I couldn’t bring myself to. Yeah, I lied about being lost and I lied about my backstory. I didn’t lie when I told you both that you were my family. I didn’t lie when I told you both that I love you. I am so sorry for what I’ve done. I know I’ve lost your trust, but I want to show you both that I truly care. I want that normal life with both of you,” I cried, looking at the boys as I continued to explain my point and pour my heart out to them. Sam was nodding as his mouth twitched into a smile. Dean clenched his jaw, staring at me with cold dull eyes. “It’s hard to forgive you when you have us tied up still,” Dean growled, interrupting my repetitive apology. Holding back a sob, I rushed over to both of them and carefully untied them. “Do you forgive me?” I bit my lip as I looked from Sam to Dean and back again. “Of course,” Sam sighed, his eyebrows knitting together as he wrapped me up into a tight bear hug. When Sam finally let me go, I turned to Dean. Dean started walking closer to me with a smirk on his face, his eyes still cold “I was thinking about you this whole time that Sammy and I were tied up here in your daddy’s hideout. I was hoping we supplied enough food for you to last. I was hoping you were safe. I was wondering if you left by now or stayed. I was hurt at the thought of you wondering why Sam and I never came home. Wondering if we had been killed or just abandoned you,” Dean exhaled sharply through his nose, shaking his head with a smile. I stayed put as Dean made his way closer to me, his words and demeanor seeming off-putting to me. A shiny object catching my eye, my heart dropped as I realized what it was. “Turns out, you were in on this little joke. Sucks that I could never trust or love a demon!” Dean held the blade high as I heard Sam and Crowley simultaneously yell “No!”. I closed my eyes as I waited for what was to come.

------

“It’s beautiful here. There’s a lot of empty space, but I kind of like it. It’s quiet,” I looked around the yard with a big smile on my face. “It’s all ours,” Sam smiled, looking down at me. “This place is awesome! Have you seen the pool? It’s massive. I can’t believe this is ours,” Dean handed Sam a cold beer and me a cold soda. Looking at the boys as they sipped on their beers with joy in their eyes as they scanned the endless yard, I could only feel at peace. This house is a start to new beginnings. Better beginnings. “Remember when you almost killed my child, squirrel?” Crowley chimed in, ruining the blissful moment.

“Dean, no!” I heard Crowley and Sam both yell as my eyes were closed. My heart beating out of my chest. My body and clothes beginning to drench in sweat. Embracing death by my friend's hand. I heard metal drop to the floor along with a body. Slowly opening my eyes, I looked down at a sobbing Dean on his knees. “I can’t hurt you. I could never hurt you,” Dean cried, holding onto my legs and resting his head on me. I took a sharp inhale as I felt my stomach twist from the amount of anxiety and pressure. Crowley grabbed the knife, pocketing it. “I’m so sorry!” Dean sobbed into my legs, his body shaking. I ran my fingers through his hair as I felt myself choke, unable to speak. “I know, Dean. I know. I forgive you!” I held onto Dean as he sobbed, feeling his hot tears drench my pants. “We’re a family. We always will be,” Sam pulled Dean up off of his knees and pulled us both into a bear hug.

“Hard to forget when you mention it at least once a day!” Dean sarcastically chirped before taking a big gulp of his beer as his smile dropped. “Good, burn it into your little brain!” “Go to hell!” Dean scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Been there, lived there, and just left!” Crowley growled, gritting his teeth. “This is supposed to be a fresh start,” I groaned, listening to Crowley and Dean go back and forth. “Home sweet home!” Sam laughed, wrapping an arm around me and pulling me close.

"Definitely. Home sweet home!" With a sigh, I smiled as I looked around our yard again.

This place is our new home.

Our home sweet home.

masterlist

SPN Tag List: @morguleth

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chaoticartwork · 4 years

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Like Peas in a Hive Pod

———————

In the halls of the HQ, a Titan roams the halls seemingly searching for something. He scratches his horned helmet and sighs, and begins to move towards the other end until he bumps into a Hunter by accident. Within a split second of running into her, he feels something odd. It feels as though he’s on constant guard, and the reek of the ozone is creeping into his mask. ‘This feeling is so familiar...is she?” He thinks to himself.

The Titan immediately grabs the girl by the arm to lift her off the ground and back to her feet. He excitedly clasps her hands together and exclaims: “You’re just like me!”

The hunter frowned a bit in confusion. She knew what this strange Titan fellow was talking about with the words 'just like me', the familiar feeling of loneliness and distance, as well as the twinges of pain in her back made it that more obvious. However she wasn't sure if she wanted to acknowledge and agree with him or deny his statement. She kept her silent and just observed for now.

"I'm sorry, who are you?" Her ghost popped in between them to help her out.

The Titan immediately realizing what he did in the middle of the excitement. “Oh! I’m sorry! My name is Leon.” He steps back and bows quickly. “I apologize for my abruptness. Didn’t mean to scare you.”

"Leon?" The ghost turned to the hunter, wondering if she knew him. The woman shrugged back in response. "Well... Good day to you then." The floating thing said to the Titan and they turned their backs and walked off.

“Wait!” Leon calls out to her. “You and I have the same...affliction...I guess. Do you want to be friends?” He puts his arms on his hips. Even though he’s wearing a helmet its obvious to tell he’s smiling.

The hunter looked and frowned once more. Affliction? Same? She was doubting how accurate that described the two of them.

"Hmm..." Once again, it was the ghost that spoke up and not the hunter herself. "Don't you find that... dangerous to be talking about to a random person you just met?"

He stops for a moment. “I guess so, but this is my friend’s clan. I trust the people in it!”

The hunter's frown deepen, seemingly disapgreeing with his choice. But it was his, and at least he didn't meet anyone who will backstab him one day. This clan houses a variety of people. And these people, though guardians, don't all hold up to the honor that most mortals portray them to have.

They have people who abuse the broken rules of the crucible; People who hog all the power ammo in matches, any type of matches, because they want to be the star of the show, and will yell at others for taking their spotlight in any way;

There are people who lack focus, or have no patience, they jump from one thing to another and achieve nothing in the end; There are people who win by framing their achievements just right to make themselves look mighty, when in reality, their scores aren't impressive;

There are people who are rude, who uses their mental illness to gain sympathy and care from others, but when they get what they wanted, they will abandon those whom had once helped them; There are ass-lickers, boot-kissers, blind trend followers...

And there certainly are *backstabbers*. To put it simply.... The clan, regardless of branch, doesn't really do much screening before people join. It's always after do they find out the rotten piece of shit in the bowl of the steaming hot soup.

"Don't." The hunter finally spoke up. "You are not safe here."

He looks at Polaroid confusedly. “I can’t really confirm that, but hey someone who is going through what I’m going through is here, plus my dear friend!”

He takes off his helmet revealing his awoken face and green eyes. “I don’t plan on joining, I’m just visiting.” He smiles. “So do you want to be friends?”

The hunter looked at him. She had no reaction for him revealing his awoken identity. At this point in her guardian life, things are just not really that surprising or interesting anymore.

"Friends seem a bit.... abrupt." She spoke with caution. Her ghost backed down once she started talking, almost like she had an authority over him. "But we can get to know each other when given the chance. My name is Polaroid, by the way. If you find that hard to pronounce, just call me Camera. Same thing."

“Polaroid...Polaroid...that sounds so familiar.” He thinks for a moment. “Oh! I have a polaroid!” He pulls out a locket with a square. It opens showing three guardians with their arms around each other: Chaox, Leon, and a female hunter with blonde hair.

He shakes his head. “I’m getting off-topic. It’s a pleasure meeting you, Polaroid!”

The hunter felt like the man might pick her up and whirl her 'round and round at any given moment with all the energy he emits.

"A pleasure." She said. "So you're friend is...?" She didn't get to see the picture that well before he excitedly put it back to... wherever he pulled it out from. Either or, she would assume that he's here to meet the friend and is lost, that's why he bumped into her.

Leon’s face saddens. “Chaox...he’s my friend, but I haven’t seen him in years.” He slaps his face in an attempt to get rid of the sadness. “But enough at me, what about you? You’re a member of this clan right?” His smile returns.

"I barely interact with people of this space nowadays, but... yeah. I am." The hunter doesn't seem to be happy about anything, nor was she ever giving a straigh answer. "I'm the information desk worker in this clan." She wasn't lying, but she also weren't telling the whole truth.

“Really? Huh, so you meet a lot of people right?” He makes a serious face for a moment. “How’s...how’s Chaox doing? Is he okay?”

Polaroid paused. The last time she had ever talked to Chaox was when he heard about her take corruption. It was all over the news. Some people even formed hate groups and had plans to 'hunt her down', or so they claim. The hunter's friends were protective, and Chaox was... well he was interested. But after that, they didn't have interaction or contact.

"He's fine, I think. I meet a lot of people, but it gets to a point where you meet too many come and go, you forget who everyone is, you know?" She guided him towards Chaox's room, up the elevator, down the hallway.

“Here...we are.” He looks visibly nervous. Leon takes a deep breath in and blows it out. “It was a pleasure meeting you, Polaroid. If we can talk again about our...issues. I’d love to hear your story.”

He knocks on the door, and scrunches his eyes. No response. Another knock. Nothing. “Ah...this is embarrassing. He may not be here.” He chuckles. “All that deliberation and worry for nothing.”

Polaroid thought about what the Titan said. "Your story first." she said in response to that. She then knocked on the door as well. "Chaox?" She said softly, as if anyone could hear her from the other side of the door.

“Haha, I suppose that’s fair.” He smiles, but his expression turns serious again. “I was possessed by a hive wizard while searching for more hive knowledge. While in my body, they hurt and betrayed people who I was close with, and started a lot of the issues on the moon.”

He sighs. “They then went to the infinite forest to try and steal the vex’s knowledge, but Stera and Chaox beat them out of me. I wandered the forest for a long time, met Saint-14 and became friends. And well, here we are!” He smiles. “Also, I’m sorry if this is all too fast. I mean we just met a couple of minutes ago, and here I am demanding to be friends.” He laughs.

"It's nice to have people whom you can count on to keep you in check." the hunter said, mumbling her words. She took a deep breath in and out. "I..... " She was still unsure of telling her own story. "I was shot in the head by a taken sniper, and since then, I can see and talk to Taken creatures that are in another plane. I can even see if people are taken corrupted. And trust me, there's more than people think."

“Huh...how interesting. You never would guess it.” Leon hold out his hand. “It truly was a pleasure meeting you, Polaroid. If you ever want to talk to someone again to someone who knows what your going through, give me a call!” He writes out his frequency on a screen he pulled out. “It’s also nice meeting a new friend.”

The woman shook his hand without hesitation. She nodded, and quickly, they parted ways.

———————

Another fun little rp between @zennore and myself!

#destiny 2 #roleplay #oc rp

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memorylang · 4 years

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Pets! Pronunciation, Saints and Souls | #12 | November 2019

I was helping the Buddhist monks understand the English alphabet one Friday, when I found they had trouble hearing me teach the sounds /ch/ and /j/. These two sounds are and have always been two I’ve struggled with since birth. Finally, I just chalked on the board, /ch/ = /ч/ and /j/ = /ж/. So, those who understood explained it in Mongolian to the others. My speech problems go way back.

I often say, I struggled with my native language too, when my Mongolian students struggle to speak English. Today, I return you to my childhood to share how personal English pronunciation problems affect my teaching today (plus stories about pets).

While a Peace Corps Volunteer, I’ve watched over both a kitten and a puppy, too. They made me reflect on life. And November begins with Allhallowtide. So I’ll wrap up today’s stories living my first full triduum to the dead.

The Challenging Child

Growing up, I fumed when siblings and especially Father kept telling me to, “Stop mumbling.” I never intended to sound inarticulate. My words just came out that way.

After graduating high school, while packing to move from home to university, my eye caught my kindergarten teacher’s file on me. I flipped through it. Astonishingly, the teacher’s notes described month after month her concerns that I seemed slow to make friends, seldom spoke and sounded hardly audible when I did. I never realized kindergarten-me troubled her.

While in Catholic elementary school, a friend and I maybe a few times per month attended a separate speech class from our classmates. Among our activities there, we sometimes played “Uno” and “Go Fish”—games I now adapt to teach English here in Mongolia (though “uno” is a Spanish word, hehe).

Before the first of those years of sessions began, my entire class underwent phonics testing. I’ll never forget this particular moment. The tester raised cards with a picture and asked me to name objects. I saw a small box with a screen and button grid. “Cell-a-phone,” I spoke with certainty.

I felt frustrated, then, when the card-holder asked me to repeat, insisting I was wrong. Finally, I said “cell phone” as she said, not, “cell-a-phone.” But I didn’t understand. Later, I later, that phonics person was correct. So I felt betrayed by my mother, who taught me wrong.

Mother read aloud to me, while I was in kindergarten and first grade. She sometimes pronounced words differently than I heard at school. I felt grumpy wondering, who could I trust? Elementary school or Mom?

As I later learned in high school and came to understand after Mother’s death, her career as an English professor let her to immigrate to America from China. So, teaching English surely mattered to her personally. She taught her second language to me to learn my first.

My Pronunciation Improved

From late middle school into high school, I wore braces. I realized my speaking problems associated with my teeth. After braces, sounds like /s/ and /th/ became easier. I recalled that elementary school tutor had drilled me on those sounds, plus /sh/, /ch/ and /j/.

At university, while singing four years in choir, I learned to articulate to help convey emotion in music. Similarly, I realized articulation helped convey emotion in speeches to bring clarity. These took vocal warm-ups, as we did in my senior storytelling course.

But, in China last summer, I learned my Chinese pronunciation was terrible. I started new regimens, like using only audio recordings to communicate instead of writing messages. I also learned to listen for exactly the right sounds. And despite my poor tonal pronunciation, instructors commended my listening. I could transcribe the right pīnyīn, for even unfamiliar words.

As a Chinese instructor now, though I, too, at times struggle to pronounce words from memory, I can recognize almost at once when I hear an off sound. For, I know how it should sound. My Chinese-instructing colleagues even notice I speak alright. I’ve come a long way.

Instructing English With Compassion

These memories lead to why, when I teach pronunciation, I give the benefit of the doubt that students aren’t trying to mumble, even when they seem to. I focus on asking students to speak louder and move their lips more. I focus on visual articulation, too, so I can see how they form sounds.

One of my university colleagues specializes in pronunciation and amazes me by how well she knows the phonetic alphabet. When I clarify pronunciations for her, she notes in phonetic letters. We bleat about English’s inconsistent phonetics sometimes, haha.

Yet, learning phonetics helps me plenty. When I catch multiple students speaking the same error, I write a series of words to course-correct. For examples, to drill, “brown,” I might write, “crown, round, down.” Or, to drill, “orange,” I might write, “or, door, floor.” I link troublesome vowels to familiar ones.

Curiously, the Mongolian language lacks the /ə/ sound, one I often spell as “uh.” I first noticed the missing sound while teaching Chinese, when my students struggled to pronounce the most basic question, “什么？(Shénme?).” It has /ə/ (or /uh/) in its second character. Thus, students misprounounced “么 /muh/” as /meh/, instead. This Mongolian lack of /ə/ makes authentic pronunciation of basic English words like articles “the” and “a” challenging.

Still, my fixation on pronunciation has its fun. Apparently this trickles into my Mongolian! Lately, I find my students gleefully giggle with amazement when, as we might be walking and chatting together, they hear me slip briefly into Mongolian to say passing pleasantries to employees or locals I know speak no English. My students often insist I sound authentic and beautiful. And I assume there’s hyperbole in those. But my colleagues, too, have said I’ve improved. They’ve no doubt I’ll speak wonderfully by this time next year. More on this at the end.

Pets! Kitten and Puppy

During my Peace Corps service I watched in the capital, Ерөө /Yeröö/, the kitten of one Volunteer, and in my current city, Azzy, the puppy of another. I saw myself in those pets.

I mentioned we Peace Corps Volunteers played, “The Shining,” for Halloween. As the film began, we Volunteers exchanged smirks when the mountain lodge’s owner explained concerns about fears of isolation during the harsh, trying winters. We sat through such talks about choosing to serve in Mongolia. But the film’s symbolism, about confronting our psyches in the mirror of isolation, felt fitting to me.

Many Mongolians fear dogs. Dogs are protectors not companions, for many. In the States, even my mother feared dogs. In fact, we had two pet dogs. I feared them a bit, too. When my parents went walking with my siblings and I, neighbors’ dogs would run up beside the road and yap at us. But Dad would always laugh and yap back, teasing Mom about how they just wanted to play. I remembered those walks even throughout college, when I strolled neighborhoods and heard barking. They gave me peace. And whenever I visited friends’ houses, their dogs most always loved me for reasons I never knew.

Azzy the puppy he would weave around my legs or leap up and cling to me momentarily, when I visited to feed him. He seemed so lonely without me. Then he would hop down, zoom around at my feet and scamper to a corner of the room. He freaked out over the simplest things, too, haha. But one morning, after his owner had come back, while I was walking into the city, Azzy zoomed to me and accompanied me from the area where we live, all the way downtown. I felt surprised, though I appreciative.

Ерөө the kitten had fun darting about our hotel room, zooming with wide eyes at light speed to achieve nothing particular. And she would flick her paws at the jingling toy I dangled, while she lept from table to chair. And, when I was journaling a little, Ерөө would hop on the bed, then leap to the desk and plop on my arm. I would pick the kitten up by her middle and set her on the floor, then she would zoom back to me again. I loved her energy, even if she seemed a little too hyper, hehe.

The pets were ecstatic for me to visit. I considered my own longings for companionship. But pets are relationships that take responsibility. And I’m hardly certain I could commit. Still, maybe because I accept others, they come. Maybe that’s all there is to it. They don’t just want love. They want to love. How sweet.

I’m glad our Peace Corps Mongolia director allows pets. They let my energetic soul see itself in the crazy creatures. Such joys, even for the effort!

All Saints’ and All Souls’ Days

The second and third day after Hallowe’en, in the Catholic tradition, celebrate first, “All Hallows,” the Saints and holy ones, living and had lived. Then we celebrate, “All Souls,” all who have passed away. The triduum has always been difficult for me the past three years, since they inevitably return to mind my loneliness since Mom’s death.

But this year was kind, for people asked me how I was doing when they greeted me. I also remembered to pray for my friends who’d lost close family. In my suffering, I remember my chance to heal others. At Mass on the last day, while others lit incense sticks for relatives, I lit one for Mother. I burned my finger. But I liked the sting. It reminded me I live. Hearing the readings of how we’re always surrounded by the saints and how the teachings assure that none of us can compare this life to the next, I felt consoled, these holy days. By the end, I’d attended Mass five days in a row! Woah.

Nowadays’ Love

I like the compliments from colleagues, students and friends that my Mongolian pronunciation’s rather good. And I know it can still be better. But they gives me great hope. My students can improve, as I have.

In our Toastmasters Club, I’ve been assigned weekly as Grammarian, tasked with correcting pronunciation for all speakers. They’re so grateful I come, and I’m so glad to help.

I recently spoke on the topic of how I chose this English teaching profession, while chatting with my senior students to prepare them for their TOEFL exams.

I recounted how Mother was an English professor and her parents were both secondary school Chinese language teachers. And it struck me how I teach both English and Chinese at both university and secondary school levels. I teach everything those two generations before me had done.

Whether children from Номгон, adults from our community speaking clubs, or new friends from the orphanage, I love the little messages I get from locals striving to improve their English. And, sometimes, those many Mongolians striving in their English remind me of Mom. She always strove. Even before I became an English instructor like her, I helped her. Maybe that’s why I aid anyone trying in English, always. They’re her.

Up Next: Thanksgiving and the Orphanage

I am extremely excited to share with you my next story, for it’s about the orphanage. I adore its community. Our children and teachers touch my soul.

As for the puppy, it’ll be a shame to say goodbye when he moves to the capital by Thanksgiving. But perhaps I’ll see him again when I visit the city sometimes!

Meanwhile, check my Instagram at memoryLang and Facebook for this year’s Thanksgiving novena of photos and memories bridging my summer life to today’s.

You can read more from me here at DanielLang.me :)

#winter #thanksgiving #Halloween #memoryLang #university #Chinese #teacher #English #student #Catholic #gratitude #story #memoir #Mongolia #Peace Corps #love #holiday #pet #cat #dog

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hopeymchope · 7 years

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Celebrity Romance - Naegiri Fanfic Prompt

From @otp-imagines-cult

Imagine your otp being famous and in a relationship except its hidden so nobody knows about it until one day they wake up and find it on all the front covers of newspapers and magazines. What happens next is whatever

Makoto Naegi was buttering some toast on top of the center island island in Kyoko’s kitchen when a notification sound went off on his phone. He set down his knife next to the toast in front of him, then picked up his phone to find a text message from Komaru.

“Check out celeb news. You guys are hot gossip.”

Upon reading it, Makoto furrowed his brow in confusion. “Huh?” he said softly to himself. Not knowing where to even find such a thing, he typed “celebrity news” into the search engine and tapped the first link he got.

He was greeted by a giant image of himsef and Kirigiri at the top of the web page. They were walking, talking, and holding hands at the park. The headline “ULTIMATE LOVE?” was plastered across the top.

He immediately returned to the search page and checked the next link on the list.

This one had a photo of the two of them on a park bench, where Makoto was leaning into Kiri’s shoulder as she smiled at him. The words in the top-right corner said “New Hope Through Love.”

A nervous laugh escaped Makoto’s mouth. This was just weird. He once again touched “Back” on his phone, then tapped the third link.

Now it was a long-distance shot of the two of himself and Kyoko kissing. It was a little blurry, and the leafy edges betrayed that it was taken from between some trees, but the headline still appeared proud as it pronounced, “Romance From Despair.”

“What the hell?” Makoto blurted to no one.

Kyoko Kirigiri entered the kitchen at that moment, still slipping into her jacket as she did so. “What’s the matter? Is the toaster acting up again?” she asked.

Makoto was already developing beads of sweat on his forehead. “It’s the… you and me… ”

Kyoko strolled to the opposite side of the island from him and pushed a button on the coffeemaker, where her mug was already resting expectantly. She then turned back towards Makoto to shoot him an expectant look. “We what?” she prodded, smiling slightly.

Makoto held up his phone anxiously, showing her the last headline. “Apparently we’re… news?” he said at last.

Kyoko’s mouth quickly turned into a small frown as she leaned forward to look at the phone more closely, then reached up and snatched it out of his hand. Makoto watched her scrolling, tapping, and generally working the phone with a greater speed than he could manage himself. As she did so, her scowl deepened.

“I should’ve expected this,” Kyoko grumbled. “I even noticed the photographer while we were on our lunch date yesterday. I thought he was just doing nature shots.”

“I didn’t see anybody,” Makoto offered.

“He didn’t want you to,” she told him. “He was sneaking behind the trees and bushes, though it’s only ‘sneaking’ in hindsight. I didn’t pay much attention since I thought he was doing close-ups of the foliage, and my own mind was…” Her frown disappeared instantly, transforming into a pleasant smile as she finished, “It was elsewhere.” She looked up at Makoto again, holding the smile, and Makoto blushed silghtly as he stared back into her eyes.

After a moment, she continued. “This was inevitable, I suppose,” Kyoko said with a shrug, looking back down at the phone. “It’s not like we’ve been hiding anything.” She extended her arm, offering Makoto’s phone back to him.

Makoto nodded in agreement as he took the phone. “Honestly, I tend to forget that we’re celebrities sometimes,” he admitted. “I mean, I know the Foundation and Hope’s Peak carry a lot of weight to people, so I don’t usually think their reactions have anything to do with me, you know?”

“I’m guilty of that as well,” Kyoko acknowledged. “Particularly when it comes to myself.” She turned her head slightly, looking towards the window. “After all, we’ve never even seen our own hit television show.”

“I’d like to keep it that way,” Makoto mumbled uncomfortably. “Do you think we’re going to be stalked by paparazzi now?”

Kyoko smirked. “With our security? They’re welcome to try. I think we’ll only need to watch out the next time we go into a publicly accessible space.”

Makoto allowed himself a small smile of relief. “You’re okay with all this, then?” he asked her.

She turned back towards Makoto with mischief glinting in her eyes. “I think we should have some fun with it.”

Makoto was puzzled. “What do you mean?” he inquired.

Kyoko stepped up to the island and leaned forward. She kept on smiling at him as she explained, “In times like these, people need entertainment as a distraction to prevent themselves from despairing over the state of the world. So let’s entertain.” She stared into his eyes as she suggested, “We can go out more frequently, make sure we kiss in public more… ”

Makoto set his phone down and leaned over the island as well. “Ohhhh, I get it,” he said. “Increase our PDA for the sake of hope?”

“The more public our affection, the better,” she agreed happily. Then Kyoko leaned even closer to him, coming within an inch of his face before she whispered, “Perhaps we should make love in the grass next time?”

“K-Kyoko!” he gasped, jerking his head back. His face was beet red.

“What? We can keep most of our clothes on,” she teased softly.

Makoto’s nervous laugh returned. “Heh, haha, uhhh… y-you’re messing with me now, right?”

“Maybe,” she admitted, flashing a grin. “You’re just so cute when you’re like this, I can’t really help it.”

Now he laughed deeply and heartily, falling forward as he did so. He caught himself with his hands atop the island. Once his laughter died down, he sounded relieved as he joked, “You’re gonna give me a heart attack one day.”

“Well, I can’t have that,” Kyoko said back, still feeling playful. “I’m going to need that thing later.”

She leaned forward just a bit more, finally pressing her mouth against his. As they kissed with the island between them, Makoto reached up and placed his hand on the back of Kyoko’s head, running it down the length of her hair.

When they separated, both of them smiled affectionately at each other.

“It’s already yours, you know,” Makoto told her gently.

Kyoko blushed slightly. “And mine is yours,” she confirmed.

Makoto grinned so widely with joy he thought his face was going to crack.

Kyoko stepped around the center island and was about to wrap her arms around him when she stopped and looked down. Her face fell, and she quietly said, “Oops.”

Makoto looked down at his shirt to find a large smear of butter between his ribs and his stomach.

“Oh, wonderful,” he groaned. “I buttered myself.”

Kyoko tried not to giggle, but she quickly failed. “Maybe you shouldn’t place food on the island next time,” she suggested. “For now, however, I know an easy way to fix this.”

Makoto glanced up at her. “Hmm? How?” he asked.

Kyoko cocked an eyebrow at him and folded her arms as her playful smile returned. “Take off your shirt,” she commanded.

#naegiri #fanfic prompt #fanfic prompts #fanfic #fan fiction #fanfiction #danganronpa #danganfanfic #danganronpa fan fiction #danganronpa fanfiction #danganronpa fanfic #kyoko kirigiri #makoto naegi #otp-imagines-cult

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