#i live in a constant state of total anxiety

[passionfruitmango]

Ok google, how do I encourage my brain to stress less about trivial things?

#ok google #sunnie thoughts #guess who's thinking about tags and getting stressed again LOL #i live in a constant state of total anxiety

[livingforthewhump]

could you pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaassseeeeeee continue the villain tortured livestreamed thing??

sequel to this

—

Hero surveyed their team, ensuring everything was properly in place. Of course, they’d already checked a dozen different times, but there wasn’t much else to do with their anxiety other than put it to good use. There was one area, probably the most important, that they lacked the expertise to check well.

“Medic?” They asked, trying not to let their anxiety seep into their words. They knew Villain would be in desperate need of medical care. How could they not know? After all, Supervillain had gone to great lengths to make them all aware of that fact. Hero was frustrated beyond all words that the thing Villain would need the most was not something they could provide them. Hero was terrible with anything to do with health, which was really a large part of the reason why they had been elected the leader. Process of elimination: they simply weren’t good at anything else.

Medic raised an eyebrow. “Everything is ready, Hero. Including you. You should sit down; You’re going to wear yourself down before you’re even out on the field.”

A shake of their head. “Can’t. Hacker is going to send the signal any moment now, and I need to be ready.”

And just like clockwork, a steady pinging noise hit Hero’s wristband, letting them know that the blackout of Supervillain’s cameras was about to begin. Hero was on the move instantly, hopping lightly out of the back of their camouflaged van with just a jerk of their head to tell Teammate to follow. As they walked they powered off their wristband. Their earpiece was left behind in the van—the electronic blackout was total, and any technology used by them would be like a foghorn in a cathedral: utterly out of place and infinitely noticeable. They knew without looking that Teammate was copying them.

The plan was simple: Hacker had gotten into their camera system from the van, locating where Villain was being held and copying down a map to it. They needed more controls to do a full camera blackout, so they froze a few frames in the security system while they went ahead of the company and took control of the security room. From there they would orchestrate a blackout that would last approximately ten minutes before someone noticed and fixed it. In the meantime they would be loading Supervillain’s files onto their own computer while Hero and Teammate went to get Villain. Five minutes in, five minutes out.

And the clock was already ticking.

The door creaked open in front of Hero, the lock having been disabled by Hacker just moments before. Without sparing more than a glance around to make sure no one was waiting in ambush, Hero took off at a sprint down the hall. The door they’d entered through was on a lower level equivalent to a basement, they supposed. Supervillain’s base was built on a slope, allowing for easy access to several different levels.

Hero hooked turns and opened doors without any hesitation. They had studied the map Hacker had made for them so many times they were certain they wouldn’t forget it as long as they’d lived. Without knowing what state Villain was in and if they were going to have to carry them out, Hero wanted as much of their time to be budgeted for their exit as possible. Teammate’s footsteps thudded just behind them, constant and reassuring.

Once they got to the door that Hero knew was Villain’s, they skidded to a halt. No one had intercepted them on their way in, which was ideal, but…unrealistic. They knew they had to be prepared for a trap. Hero took a split second to catch their breath and toss a look over their shoulder to Teammate, who gave a nod and pulled out their weapon, holding it at the ready.

Hero pulled a small kit out of their pocket, slotting a tiny explosive into the space between the door and the frame just over where the doorknob was. A small press of a button and a cautious step back later, a tiny explosion of various acids and chemicals corroded and broke through the lock much faster than Hero could have. Hero pushed the door open and stepped inside.

The room was easily recognizable as the one the ransom video had been recorded in. The concrete walls were the same, the same chair was set up in the center with knotted rope neatly coiled in its seat as though it were just waiting to be used again, even the camera was still set up on a tall tripod a few feet away from the chair. One wall was covered in knNives and grotesque tools for torture. Dark blood puddled on the floor, some dried and flaky, and some still pooling in the grim light.

In the opposite corner huddled a small form—Villain. They were not easily recognizable as the same one in the ransom video, the same one who came to Hero with a defiant scheme to take down Supervillain and spent late nights researching and planning and brought them coffee in the morning when neither of them had slept. No. This couldn’t be the same one.

But it was.

Their hair was lanky, falling over their face and hiding their eyes in shadow. Or maybe it was just bruising so dark that Hero couldn’t tell the difference. Their knees were tucked up to their bare chest protectively, arms wrapped around their legs and face buried down. Even from here Hero was struck by how loosely their pants hung, how scrawny and thin their arms looked compared to how they used to be. Slightly bloodied cuffs were holding their wrists together, and their arms were covered in mottling bruises and purposeful cuts and what looked like cigarette burns. Hero took a step forward, trying to shake themself out of their horrified stupor, and the small figure that they knew was Villain cowered back, eyes flicking up to them. Hero couldn’t see their eyes well enough to tell if there was any recognition or hope in them, or just fear.

They crossed the room quickly so they could kneel down next to Villain.

“Villain, it’s me, Hero,” they said quietly, eyes moving over Villain’s form without thinking. “You look awful.” Apparently their mouth also moved without thinking.

It was true, though. Up close, even more so. Now Hero could see that some of the cuts on their arms spelled out words, crudely carved into the captive villain.

“Are you here to break me out?” Villain’s voice came out hoarsely like they hadn’t used it properly in weeks. Still, there was a sardonic edge to their voice, a slight glint in their eyes telling Hero to stay focused and remember their mission. Hero was in awe of that strength that remained after they had been put through all hell.

“Of course,” Hero scoffed. It should have been obvious.

Villain’s face darkened. “But…Youngest. Supervillain said—”

“Can you walk?” Hero interrupted.

“Um,” Villain hummed noncommittally, face screwing up while they shifted their legs. They tried to stifle a whimper in their throat, but Hero heard it loud and clear. “Supervillain kind of, um. Broke my leg with a mallet?”

“They what?” Hero hissed, rage spiking red through their vision. They took a long, controlled breath. “Okay. I can carry you. We just need to get out of here.”

Without waiting another second they scooped their arms underneath Villain and stood. They were much lighter than they should have been. They tried their best to ignore that and just start walking. Hero met Teammate’s eyes as they exited the God-forsaken room with Villain in tow. Teammate’s face was blank, but there was a tightness around their eyes and mouth that spoke volumes to Hero about just how bad Villain looked now that they weren’t folded over themself against a wall.

Villain’s bound arms now lay demurely over their lap, by Hero’s chest. This close, it was hard not to look at the words etched into them with a lazy and sadistic hand.

Coward.

Traitor.

Mutt.

Hero swallowed bile and started jogging. Villain cried out under their breath at the jostling it required, but Hero just went faster. If they didn’t get out of there they couldn’t promise that they weren’t going to turn around and find Supervillain just so they could make them pay for each one of those marks.

They didn’t remember getting back to the van, but suddenly they were there, and Teammate and Medic were lifting Villain from Hero’s arms and onto a small gurney strapped in place in the back of the van. It was a slightly makeshift setup.

Hero made themself climb into the van just so they could get closer to Villain, to make sure they were okay. Medic had them laying down and was cutting through their pants so they could get to the broken bone to set it. Villain’s head tilted wearily to the side, seeking out Hero. Their hand reached out and Hero caught it easily, letting them squeeze while Medic reset the bone. Before Villain’s yell had even died down, Hacker had the engine revved and was driving away.

Villain was passed completely out by the time they reached their base, and Hero wasn’t far from it. They insisted they carry Villain inside, now swathed in bandages and cleaned as best as they could manage with the supplies they’d brought. They were frightfully thin, ribs poking out like knuckles through their battered skin. A deep red burn slashed down their chest, drawing attention to the bright and inflamed skin around it compared to the ombre of bruises and scabbed cuts covering them. Supervillain had even signed their name on them, like they were a damned canvas.

Time wasn’t really making sense to Hero when they set Villain down in the medwing. They noticed it was dark outside when they left the van, and the full moon was bright overhead, but they didn’t know the time. They remembered Hacker remarking something about being surprised that Youngest wasn’t waiting up for them, and the tired laughter that went around the group. They remembered the color of Villain’s skin against the clean white sheet, and the weariness in Medic’s eyes as they went to fetch their charts and IVs. They remembered being pushed into a nearby bed, but they weren’t sure who it was that pushed them there.

Then they felt sunlight hitting their eyelids as their consciousness swam back into awareness.

“How is Villain?” Hero was asking before their eyes were even fully open. Hacker sat in a seat beside Villain’s bed, computer open on their lap.

Hacker’s lips twitched slightly. “Good morning to you too. I slept great.” A beat of silence let their joke fall flat, and they sighed. “Villain’s doing fine. Malnourished and dehydrated and very weak, but stable. They still haven’t woken up. They needed the rest.” Their appraising eyes went back to Hero. “You did too. Medic made some coffee before I threatened them into going to rest. How are you feeling?”

“Fine.” Hero stood, swaying just slightly as they made their way to Medic’s office and the coffee machine on their desk. “Where’s Sidekick?”

Hacker shrugged. “I haven’t seen them. They’re probably taking advantage of having those training halls all to themself.”

“Find anything in those files yet?”

A heavy sigh filled the air with the cadence of something done many times already. “I have them loaded up, but they’re heavily encrypted, and the decoding has taken me hours. I think I just about have it, though.”

Hero had poured themself a mug and was seated in a chair opposite Hacker when they let out a triumphant shout that just about made Hero spill their coffee.

“I got it!” Hacker grinned, gesturing Hero over. Before they even got to Hacker’s side, their smile was dropping. The only folder on the drive was one titled “I hope you enjoy your trade :)”

Hero’s stomach dropped. The file was filled with pictures and videos of Villain, during their captivity, displaying in horrible detail everything that was done to them.

Except, at the very end, was a link.

Hacker clicked it, fearing the worst.

Youngest’s teary face filled the screen.

—

hero/villain taglist (and those who wanted to be tagged in the continuation): @castielamigos-whump-side-blog @twistedcaretaker @lonesome--hunter @poppys-writing @endless-whump @multifandoms-multishipper @shadowylemon @utopian819 @whumpkitty @journey-the-panda @freefallingup13 @prettyboysinpain @1becky1 @temporary-whump-sideblog @chartreusephoenix @thelazywitchphotographer @onestopheroxvillain @smolxhero @mylifeisonthebookshelf @broadwaybabe18 @grizzlie70 @sunflower1000 @digitalart-dwa @tobeornottobeateacher @wolfeyedwitch @canigetanamenforbritney @ladygwennn @onlywhump @suspicious-whumping-egg @classicplesiosaur @lemongrass404 @defectiveangel13 @alainayumira @spiccykels @jadeocean46910 @icarusinstatic @will-ruadh @pumpkin-spice-whump @michelleswhumpyreblogs @cyberneticfire @tinyreadinglifelight @savagelysarcasticsilence @void-fireworks @dead-whispers @strawberryglitterball @writing-with-olive @rose-pinkie @didieatyourdog @corvid-voidbur @whump-for-all-and-all-for-whump @princess-poopsicle @hollowgast1 @naturallyathief @equestrianwritingsstuff @yells-in-lowercase @antmeisteronion @ace-caz

#this has been one of my most highly requested continuations :D #I hope it was worth the wait #whump writing #villain whumpee #villain whump #hero caretaker #supervillain whumper #rescue #rescue whump

[angel-of-the-moons]

I have a kinda angsty Pavitr fic idea for you.

SO let’s say it’s a poly relationship: Pavitr x Gayatri x reader. we all love each other us as the reader we are very secure with ourselves and within our relationship

but as time goes on we start to feel left out, we start to feel as though Pavitr and Gayatri don’t love us as much as they say they do, we start to think that if anything they love each other that way not us.

so we start to slowly pull away slowly stop hanging out with them, slowly start distancing ourselves until we finally just blow up (we don’t yet state what’s wrong) and tell them both we no longer want to be in the relationship and we just leave it at that. obviously Pavitr and Gayatri aren’t going to just take that so eventually we have to talk it out, communicateeee and then we try to solve the issue. (hopefully ending in either us getting back together with them or it being bittersweet with us not getting back together but staying close with them whatever you want!!)

Okay I've been mulling this one over. I know very little about Gayatri other than the bits I've seen.

Conflictions

Poly!Pavitr x Gayatri x Reader

(And before people come screeching into my inbox for the hundredth time... Pavitr and Gayatri are adults in this goddamn fic)

TW/CW: Reader has hella anxiety (and probs needs therapy lmao), throughout this whole thing, overworked, exhausted, massive insecurities on reader's behalf. Did I mention that I totally headcanon Gayatri as a freak in bed? Nothing inappropriate happens tho, just hints.

A/N: Using general terms such as "them/they" so you can leave gender up to interpretation! (Also WHEEW! I struggled with this one, but I'm proud of it!)

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You were probably the luckiest person in the world. You finally nailed your dream job, moved out on your own, and in with your partners.

Yes, partners. You had you sweet, classy girlfriend, Gayatri, and your bubbly, and always adorable boyfriend, Pavitr. Your families were all understandably confused at this. Gayatri's father seemed--at least--more at ease with you than Pavitr, for whatever reason...

Living together was certainly interesting. You all had your own rooms (though "sleepovers" and "cuddle puddles" as Pavitr called them were very common), a chore chart, designated nights for who makes dinner, even scheduled date nights!

You all had a system, it was well-oiled and full of love.

But... With your new job, even if being the one You've always wanted... It demanded more and more hours, more time away from home, less sleep, less time with Pavitr and Gayatri.

You couldn't help but feel that... Because of your absence they were pushing you out, or away. That maybe they mistook your work schedule for some form of neglect? That you didn't take the relationship seriously enough?

Suffocatingly, it almost felt like their love for you was getting to be less and less every day, despite their constant words of affirmations.

The nasty voice and claws of anxiety wormed their way into your ears and dug into your heart. What if they were thinking about having you back out of the relationship? What if they were thinking of leaving?

You were losing even more sleep, especially when your fears, to you, seemed compounded when you would come home to a dark apartment, a note scrawled on the dry-erase board above the phone in bright blue.

'Gone out for dinner. We made something especially for you for dinner, though! Yum yum yum! Get some rest!

-- Pav & Gaya.'

You would feel more left out than before, even when you found your occasional days off. Pavitr and Gayatri would leave you alone, only sparing the sweet, quick hugs or kisses in passing.

You felt suffocatingly at arms length.

Your coworkers gave you their two-cents, and told you that maybe you were too busy, too independent, and the opinion that hurt the worst: you probably just weren't attractive to them anymore, couldn't keep their interests.

Were they bored of you?

Maybe it was all in your head, maybe you were overdramatic. But the stupid little parasite of doubt and questioning of self-worth was ever-present in your mind, eating away at your securities...

You cried in the shower, too afraid to confront the elephant in the room with them.

You kept it bottled up and to yourself, not wanting to bring it up with them and have the fears that are you confirmed by their own words.

You tried. You tried so hard to keep it all in, to hide it away so they wouldn't shove you away even more.

Until one day you simply couldn't do it anymore. You were breaking down but by bit and finally, you just... couldn't. You were tired of it.

Tired of being tired, tired of being afraid you just weren't good enough.

You tried to be strong, sound sure of yourself when you sat them down, but you still broke down into tears after you said you wanted out. Out of the relationship, out of the apartment. You felt like you were encroaching on their privacy and relationship with one another. You felt like a virtual stranger in your own home, your own love life.

You'd still cover your half of the bills even if you weren't living there, of course. You weren't cruel enough to leave them with that much due on their plates. And you knew your parents would let you live rent-free anyways if you moved back in...

It felt like your heart was being frozen and shattered into a million tiny, fragile pieces as you packed your suitcase, sniffling the whole way.

You couldn't even look at them while you did it, because you knew if you did, you'd stay.

You couldn't see Gayatri holding tears back in her eyes while she held her trembling bottom lip between her teeth as Pavitr held her shoulders, burying his face in her hair to hide his own sadness and heartbreak.

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It had been a week since you were gone. A week since your smell finally left the air of the apartment, since your shampoo was missing from the shower caddy, since your favorite towel and toothbrush were taken away.

Since your room was dark and empty. Devoid of life.

Just devoid of you.

Did it feel colder? It felt colder in here, now that you weren't home, Pavitr was sure. You just brought this... this warmth with you wherever you went. People liked to say he was the ray of sunshine because of his personality, but your whole being just exuded warmth, and safety.

Neither he nor Gayatri realized how badly they'd miss it until you were gone. How badly they'd miss you.

Pavitr pulled his mask off and dropped it onto the couch as he walked by, tired despite having full rest. Maybe it was from chasing bad guys? Yeah, that had to be it.

He stalked to Gayatri's room first, needing at least a partial "cuddle-charge". But when Pavitr poked his head in, the only thing he could see was the dim, warm light of Gayatri's salt lamp on her nightstand next to her bed.

Her bed was still well-made and empty.

He frowned, turning to his door instead and peered into it. His bed was still messy (he always forgot to make it, it was something both you and Gayatri would playfully tease him over) but most importantly, it was also empty.

He hesitantly lifted his head to look at your door. Or, well, what had been your bedroom door. Before you left...

It was cracked just slightly.

He licked his dry lips and eased the door open, and saw Gayatri, curled up on her side with her face buried into one of your pillows, the cushion still having the case with the cute little cartoon cow printed on it.

He could tell by how her chest was stuttering that she was crying, or at least had been...

"Gayatri?" Pavitr asked softly, sitting on the edge of the bed.

She curled in on herself a bit more, more soft sniffling could barely be heard, muffled by the pillow.

"Baby." He sighed, moving so he could curl over her.

"I miss them." She mumbled, her voice hoarse.

"...I do, too." Pavitr whispered into her hair.

"Why did they leave?" She rolled over until Pavitr was practically laying on top of her, his head on her chest as she petted his hair.

"I don't know." Pavitr sighed, wrapping his arms around her waist and snuggling her like a teddy bear.

"Did we do something? I... I can't think of anything that would..."

"I don't know." Pavitr repeats softly, snuggling closer to her. "I don't--I don't think we did. They've been so... so busy lately, I..."

"What if we did, though? I just... I don't want to even think about it, I..." The tone in her voice was unmistakable, anxious and afraid. It was so unlike Gayatri, she was always confident, refined.

This wasn't... her. Sounding so utterly heartbroken, so lost. Pavitr's arms tighten around her midsection and he squeezes his eyes shut.

"Why did they say anything?" He whispers. "We... We could have... I... We could have talked, or..."

Gayatri nervously licked her bottom lip.

"...Maybe we can still talk to them? Bring them back here, talk it out... Or..."

"D'you think that would work?" He asked, lifting his head to meet her eyes.

"What could it hurt?" She said, a tiny hopeful smile on her lips.

"Yeah.... Yeah!" Pavitr sat up, looking down at her with an excited smile as he nods feverishly, his dark curls bobbing animatedly.

Gayatri can't help but smile back and graze his cheek with her hand.

"Okay, so we can call them tomorrow..."

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You felt your guts churning with anxiety ever since you got the text from Gayatri and Pavitr in your group chat (that you still could not bring yourself to delete).

You were sitting in front of a computer in your office, eyes dry and bloodshot from being there since 6am that morning. You'd gotten the text at 1pm. It was currently 4pm, you agreed to meet them back at their apartment at 5.

Your shift was up in fifteen minutes, and you could barely focus on the spreadsheets in front of you the whole time, that text staring at you right in the face like a big scary monster waiting to bite you.

What did they want to talk about? Did they really want to finally just... tell you not to come back? Were they going to tell you that this was it, that they didn't even want to be friends anymore?

It had only been a week, had they already decided they didn't want you anymore? Was you being completely gone from their personal spaces enough to show that they didn't need you around at all?

The anxiety and fear are at your guts, your heart beating wildly like a frightened bird in a cage.

God... This was pure torture.

You almost had a heart attack when your coworker tapped you on the shoulder, reminding you your shift was up.

Oh, god...

Time to get the torture out of the way, so you can move on with your pathetic little life...

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The walk back to the apartment has been daunting. You felt like you were teetering on the brink, tiptoeing on the eggshells of your self-confidence and internalized fear that they secretly hated you, somehow.

The text was so short, so matter-of-fact.

'Need you to come by the apt at 5. It's important.' Gayatri had texted first.

'Yeah! Like, suuuuuper important! :0' Pavitr added.

You felt the icy fingers of dread snake back into your heart, crawling through your arteries and turning your blood into icy sludge as you walked up the stairs, palms sweaty and mind racing.

When you were in front of the door, you simply stared at the wood in front of you, as if it would come to life and tell you to leave and never come back, to tell you exactly what you were afraid of.

It didn't.

You raised your hand to knock, hesitating to bring your knuckles into contact with it.

Your fingers a mere millimeter away from it, the door swung open and Pavitr met you with his ever-adorable, happy puppy demeanor. You'd always swore that he was some kind of dog in a human body, with how happy and excitable he was.

"Hey! It's you! We--" His demeanor changed and his brows pinched and a soft, concerned frown cemented itself on his face.

"...God! You look awful! C'mon!" He grabbed you by the hand, gently leading you inside. He looked at your joined hands, and his brows furrowed once more, deeper.

"You're all clammy. Are you sick?"

"N.... No. 'm just tired." You mutter shyly, swallowing hard. You felt like your heart was beating so wildly it was trying to crawl up and out of your throat to run away screaming.

Why were you so goddamn nervous? Why did you have to be like this?

When he brought you through the kitchen, a nice little dinner was set up, Gayatri sitting at the table and she gave you a warm--gorgeous--welcoming smile.

When that smile always used to give you a sense of calm before, you felt the maelstrom of anxiety batter your mental walls relentlessly.

God, this sucks.

"Come on, sit!" Pavitr chirps cheerfully. His tone sounds almost forced, but you bite back the thought that this is all just a face for you, to placate you.

The three of you sit down, and to say it's awkward was the understatement of the century.

Gayatri portions the takeout evenly amongst you three, and the tension in the air is so thick you could slice it with a spoon.

Or at least... That's how you perceived it.

It felt like an eternity before Gayatri broke the tense silence, asking how your day at work was, to which you gave a half-mumbled reply of "fine" in between bites of your food.

You had your eyes trained down on your food, so you didn't notice how Pavitr and Gayatri exchanged worried looks towards you.

They continue to make small talk with you, being cordial and polite.

"So, um! Yeah, Gayatri thought she saw a mouse in the cupboard the other day..." Pavitr laughed nervously.

Gayatri's cheeks flushed. "Pav! C'mon, it's not that funny!"

"So you remember that fake mouse I bought like, a month ago?" He asked you, leaning in and waggling his eyebrows.

"Yeah..." You say, still not looking up from your meal.

Pavitr clears his throat and forcefully trains himself to keep his chipper and upbeat tone as he continues.

"And you remember, that I misplaced it? Turns out, I remembered what happened to it! I stuffed it in the cabinet and planned on using it to scare one of you!" He rubs the back of his neck and rolls his eyes sheepishly.

"Yeah... Given that the joke waited a whole month to drop... It wasn't a very good one... Ha ha..."

"It was a terrible joke!" Gayatri says, pointing her spoon at him threateningly. "I almost fainted!"

Pavitr sticks his finger up, "Ah, ah, my dear! But you didn't!"

Pavitr and Gayatri exchange playful banter like that for a few minutes, and it feels like you're just absorbed into your chair. It simply makes you feel more alienated than you should feel.

Each happy and honeyed word they speak to each other hits you like an arrow in the heart, until you eventually just break down and start crying.

Immediately, the playful aura in the room dissipates, and they're at your side in a second, rubbing your back, holding your hand... Gayatri even kisses your cheek a few times.

All it takes is for Pavitr to rest his forehead against your temple, his sweet voice asking so gently, what exactly was bothering you?

It's like someone blows a dam, and it all comes tumbling out of you in choked-out, sobbed words and sniffles washed down your face by the streams that were your tears. All your insecurities, your fears, your exhaustion, out in the open; your vulnerabilities exposed and flayed raw.

The look of sheer disbelief on their faces was enough to knock you even more off kilter.

That's when they cling to you, petting your hair, kissing your tears away.

"Lovie..." Pavitr said, his voice all choked up with emotion. "We... We just didn't want to bother you, or annoy you. You've been working so much we left you alone so you could rest."

Gayatri adds on, "We didn't want to drag you out on the town dead on your feet."

Her sweet face pinches down in a frown, "And who the hell told you that you're not good-looking enough for us? C'mon! You've seen how I look like a hag in the morning! You're gorgeous!"

Your eyes are constantly flickering between them as their voice sweet, loving words and affirmations to you, being ever so gentle and understanding.

It's enough to break your heart and send fresh tears stinging in your eyes once more.

Pavitr kisses your cheek what feels like a million times.

"Sweetheart..." Gayatri says, "I... I know that this was your dream job... But... I think you should either ask for less hours or... or quit. They're overworking you, putting strain on you mentally. You're going to drop dead from a heart attack because of all this!"

"I... I can't just..." You sniffle pathetically, wiping your nose in one of the thin napkins on the table.

"Hey! We will go in and do it for you! Seriously! You're sick because of this! You're not sleeping, it's destroying you!" Pavitr said, frowning.

"Exactly. Baby..." Gayatri continued. "We know you wanted this job, but do you love it? When was the last time you had fun at work? That you weren't tired, or drained?"

You sniffled as you wiped at your nose as her words bounced around in your brain. When was the last time you felt any of that? You couldn't remember...

Was she right? Was you dream job not what you convinced yourself it was? Had you really allowed them to snap you in place like a replaceable battery cartridge? Could they replace you just as easily with a new hire? You also couldn't remember a time your coworkers would be considered your friends, or that they were genuinely nice to you. Especially that woman that told you that maybe Pavitr and Gayatri just didn't find you attractive like they used to.

"And lovie..." Pavitr sighed softly, resting his head on your shoulder. "You haven't been eating either, your face is so sunken, your obviously haven't gotten enough sun..."

"We miss you." Gayatri whispered, kissing your cheek and resting her forehead against yours. "Come home to us."

"It's so cold and empty without you." Pavitr told you, his voice cracking. "Sometimes it's hard to sleep without you."

You felt your heart shatter into a million tiny pieces, and at the same time, you felt Pavitr and Gayatri's hands gently scooping up each piece and kissing them back into place, one by one.

"And, honestly, with your anxiety, I think you need to see a doctor." Gayatri told you sweetly, caressing your cheek with her thumb. "Running around like this will kill you, one day."

"We can go with you, make it easier." Pavitr said, kissing your shoulder.

You sniffle and finally--finally--you allow a smile to be placed on your face.

"Okay... I'll come home." You whisper.

The way they hugged you, you felt like your spine was going to pop out of place, like your whole body was squeezed in a vice.

"What about work?" Pavitr asked you, his grin so wide his cheeks looked like they would fall right off his handsome face.

"I..." You swallow hard, recalling Gayatri's words.

"Screw it. I quit."

Gayatri planted a thousand tiny kisses all over your face, squishing your cheeks in her hands so you couldn't escape.

"Hey! Gaya!" Pavitr grinned, wrapping his arms around your waist and giving Gayatri a playful look.

"Hmm?" She hummed, giving him her signature sly smirk.

"You thinking what I'm thinking we could do to celebrate?" Pavitr waggled his eyebrows.

You swallowed hard at the implications of his suggestion.

"A cuddle puddle!"

Yeah, you really shouldn't have expected Pavitr of all people to go right into dirty territory when it comes to "celebrating".

But you could tell by how Gayatri grinned, and that mischievous twinkle in her eyes, that she had a plan forming in turning the cuddle session into something far more intimate.

Oh... You forgot to remember that Gayatri was a real firebrand in the sheets, huh?

#pavitr prabhakar x reader #pavitr prabhakar #pavitr prabhakar x you #pavitr x you #pavitr x reader #pavitr x gayatri #pavitr x gayatri x reader #pavitr x gayatri x you #🌙 answered

[direwolfrules]

Oh my fairy godmother I am so happy you are post about Ever After High!!! Do you have any fanfic or au ideas involving them? Like, what if one character had another destiny or what if they were in the Star Wars universe?! It’s just interesting to think about!

Hey! Glad to see we share another fandom interest!

So, I have this barebones post for what I would have done as a crossover between g1 Monster High and Ever After High.

As for general fanfic ideas I have a few. I shall now list them in varying levels of detail:

1. A Very Charming Groundhog Day Year:

Basically, the Charming siblings time loop back from a bit after Dragon Games but before Epic Winter to the day before the school year started (the day of the Family Ball in the books). While it would be kinda angsty, the best time loop fics are usually crack fics, and this would be no exception (if I ever wrote any of these things).

So Daring, Dexter, and Darling are all initially in states of panic and anxiety. Daring, he was in the middle of a quarter-life crisis and now has to deal with everyone and their fairy godmother thinking he's Apple's Prince Charming.

"Daring Charming, more like Distressed Charming, am I right?"-- Dexter, who should get to exhibit asshole little brother energy more often, as a treat.

Speaking of Dexter, he's panicking cause of all the awful stuff that's going to happen during the school year and also because now he has to go through the nerve-racking ordeal of asking out the girl he likes all over again.

Darling's in hell because everyone and their fairy godmother expect her to be this perfect little damsel, again, which is just- ugh. There are days she wishes she could carry her sword around with her, and they're most days. Also, she never got to talk to Apple about their True Love's CPR, which is just tragic.

The loops go on for a while, some constants in them include: Darling freeing herself and helping little Good-Enough Charming get one of their grandfather's trophies for the scavenger hunt, Dexter and Darling teaming up to kill the changeling and free cousin Charity (sometimes Daring helps but he's content to let his siblings have fun for once), Darling accidentally on purpose flirting with Apple and Apple experiencing several degrees of gay panic, Dexter fumbling asking out Raven for the first time (he's really such a dork, just a funky dude), and the Charming Siblings teaming up to make Milton Grimm's life a living hell.

In one loop they secretly film him playing with his toy unicorns and his action figure of himself and they hijack Blondie's mirrorcast to play it to the entire school.

After several loops a Monster High crossover happens, and so in every loop after that the Charming sibs, who have grown incredibly gremlin-like after experiencing the insanity of the school several dozen times, make sure to drop monster slang when it's just them and Cupid. Like:

Darling: "Wow, Cupid, that top looks clawsome."

Daring: "Totally, it's freaky fierce."

Cupid: "What?!"

Darling: "That top looks nice on you. Anyway, we gotta run."

Dexter: "Yeah, see you later ghoulfriend!"

I have some other half-baked ideas for this one but it'd probably be it's own post.

2. Murdoch Mysteries-ish AU:

This one makes no sense if you've never watched the hit Canadian Detective Show, Murdoch Mysteries. Or maybe it makes some sense, idk. Instead of a modern AU, we have a 1895 detective AU. It's barely an idea, I have no idea if I'd even keep this in the fantasy setting of (an 1895) Ever After or not.

Dexter is the Detective William Murdoch of this AU, the man with no game and beautiful blue eyes who women keep inexplicably falling in love with. He's observant and a little strange but he's also a brilliant detective. One of the major differences though is Dexter is the disowned son of old money parents.

Raven's the Dr. Julia Ogden, the outspoken, independent, and compassionate coroner helping solve cases and being amazing. Her rich, controlling mother doesn't much approve of her life choices but old Mrs. Queen can suck it. Raven and Detective Charming have a clearly mutual attraction but they're both hesitant to act on it cause what's a romance without a good slow-burn.

Hopper's the Constable George Crabtree of this AU. Listen, the everyday George matches Hopper's human side, and writer George matches Hopper's frog side. I will not elaborate, because I really cannot. Just feel the vibes, cause the words aren't coming.

I'm not 100% sure who'd be the Inspector Brackenreid. Part of me kinda wants to make it Professor Badwolf, and then I could make Milton Grimm the asshole commissioner. Coach Gingerbreadman is the Inspector of Station 5, the rivals of Station 4.

Daring is heir to the Charming family fortune. Golden boy, everyone loves him, wants more than anything to be able to talk to his little brother in public, but their parents would disown him as well if he stepped out of line.

Apple is one of Raven's housemates at Sisters boarding house, run by Bella and Brutta Sister. She was once courted by Daring, it was at the point where people were expecting an engagement announcement any day. That's when they suddenly broke it off, with no explanation (the explanation is Daring's in love with another girl and Apple's in love with his sister). Snow White and her husband barely agreed to let her move into the boarding house, I honestly have no clue how Apple managed to pull that off but good for her.

Idk, Darling's a vigilante. She's got the same deductive genius as Dexter, she just doesn't have the same ability to join the police force. Inspector Badwolf is tired of his cops being outdone by the mysterious White Knight (yeah, yeah, I made Darling into Victorian-era Batman). Couldn't the White Knight patrol Station 5's territory? (The answer is no, because Darling really wants to catch a glimpse of her twin and also because Sisters Boarding house is in Station 4's territory and sometimes she likes to secretly crash with her girlfriend).

3. The Destiny Cycle AU (AKA: Ever After High but the Rebel Movement is an actual Rebellion AU):

What it says on the tin. Raven discovers the book is fake before Legacy Day. Her and Dexter, who in this AU is believed to be Ashlynn's future Prince Charming because someone made a good post about the potential dynamics that could cause and I love it, set out to uncover what other secrets those in charge are hiding.

Basically, in this AU Ever After is a dystopia where the Royal Families tied the survival of their dynasties' rule to their stories. Like, magically tied them. The Fates themselves have been bound by the magic of the Destiny Cycle. Ever After's Destiny-bound citizens are forced to repeat the same stories as their ancestors, all because Happily Ever After doesn't include a revolt or the institution of democracy. All stories are repeated as a precaution against anyone figuring out what the ancestors of the Royal Families did.

Taking some inspiration from the SDCC Raven Queen doll's letter from her mother, the Evil Queen discovered the truth about the Destiny Cycle, said "not my kid you bastards", and proceeded to try to break the Cycle's bonds. Her taking over other stories and cursing Wonderland was an attempt to stretch the probability bonds of the Destiny Cycle's magic to the breaking point.

Stuff's gonna go down and basically these kids know time is running out until there's a war, cause the only way to avoid being offered up as a lamb to the slaughter is to overthrow the whole system.

God, I really gotta make this into it's own post as well now. But here's a basic rundown of some stuff I'd include:

Dexter and Raven being young and in love and just all the secret romance feels

Snow White knows about the Destiny Cycle, but Apple absolutely does not know.

Apple being born blonde is a sign that the Evil Queen's schemes loosened the grip of the Destiny Cycle, at least for a moment.

Ashlynn, Hunter, Dexter, and Raven as secret rebel leaders.

The backgrounders will have actual roles dammit! (Looking at you Lawrence Bonecrusher III, aka Orc Boy).

An exploration of artificial Destiny Cycle "True Love" vs. real True Love, featuring Apple, Daring, and Darling.

C.A. Cupid, sent by her godly family to infiltrate Ever After and cure it of the Destiny Cycle, because it's interfering in the domains of the gods.

A unique Monster High crossover idea that I will elaborate on in another post.

These children absolutely end up having to kill someone and it scars them forever.

As for different destinies AUs or Star Wars AUs, I haven't really given them much thought.

I think, in a Star Wars setting (possibly Old Republic?), Raven would be a Jedi padawan descended from a long line of Sith. Instead of Mirror Prison, her mom is dead and her Force Ghost is bound to a giant, mirrorlike piece of kyber crystal. Uh, not 100% sure who her master would be.

Darling would also be a Jedi padawan, and Maid Marian would be her Master. Maid Marian gets into custody battles over this kid with this old Jedi Watchman known only as The White Knight. She'd still have her time-slowing hair flip, in this AU it's just a unique way of activating the Force Slow ability.

#eah #ever after high #ever after high au #apple white #raven queen #daring charming #darling charming #dexter charming #dexterous charming #c.a. cupid #eah evil queen #eah snow white #ashlynn ella #hunter huntsman #eah maid marian #professor badwolf #hopper croakington ii #dappling #milton grimm #headmaster grimm #all these can be taken and used as fic prompts btw #I doubt I'll ever actually sit down and write any of them

[haibarashiho]

I have to speak about this! I just have to cuz OMG. The details the angst. And the fact hinamori is going through a PTSD. Ughh

Hinamori awakened after Hitsugaya was dispatched to the mission. And it seems she was persistent to speak to him that she went straight to the headmaster. By her face, she was suffering and struggling each day without sleep. Guilt with PTSD. We can assume by her dark eye bags she was Re-living the traumatic event through recurring memories, flashbacks or vivid nightmares. And the guilt is her constant attempt to talk to Hitsugaya.

Hitsugaya first words to her was asking about her well being. ( my heart he is always worried about her more than himself ) and this is the first time we have seen Hitsugaya smile. As well as him noticing her features. He never missed a thing in that short call.

We can see how much they focused at his eyes. Eyes don’t lie. Without doubt her actions towards him totally didn’t bother him. He was more bothered about her injuries. His next words shows what he was bothered about. Her lack of sleep, her dark features, he even made a joke and funnily enough compared her to Matsumoto. ( we know he just can’t admit his worries because he doesn’t want her to feel any more worse. )

Hinamori blush? I guess she felt embarrassed about how Hitsugaya as well noticed her lack of growth lmao .

Then we got his famous sentence. ( He looks manly. My heart. ) and her smile, Anyway after that. Look at his curious expression? He is paying so much attention to the conversation regardless. Until she mentioned Aizen. Look the focus at the eyes again! And HERE The ptsd on action again ——

An intense emotional and physical reaction when reminded of the trauma including, sweating, anxiety, panic, heart palpitations ( we can’t know about the tachycardia but the sudden excessive sweat and her physical demeanor tell enough! She was barely holding herself together ) she was also mentally still not recovering. Not believing what happened at that time.

I’m not sure if Hitsugaya noticed this or not, But when Hinamori asked to save him and tried to excuse aizen. she was also mentally still not recovering. Not believing what happened at that time. It was evident in the anime more with the focus and the sound. As if she went into a hysterical state

The anger within him intensified, this isn’t about just her bleeding anymore.

#momo hinamori #hitsugaya toushirou #hitsuhina #toshiro hitsugaya #hinamori momo #tōshirō hitsugaya

[heybaetae]

alright, his letter really got me.

if i can get kinda personal really quick—which i usually avoid doing too much—i promise it’s warranted if you feel like reading to the end of this post in which i’m about to share some things about a deeply painful experience i went through this year and am still enduring the weight of. if you follow me closely enough, you probably know what i’m referring to…

before i do though, i want to mention how truly mind blowing it is that someone who already means a lot to you can somehow keep becoming more and more important as time goes on without even doing much, really, just by being there. since the start of the year, i have not been in the best mental state. i suffer from anxiety and depression which causes me to have a really tough time sleeping and it’s only gotten worse over the months.

i cannot stress enough how many times jungkook lifted my spirit and my mood on some of my worst days/nights since he started doing his frequent weverse lives. it sounds bleak to say because it is, but he was one of the only constant sources of light in my life this year. i can’t tell you how many times it felt like whenever i was feeling my lowest or was riddled with dread about something, i’d suddenly get a notif that he was live. like he’d just pop up when i’d need a distraction the most. even if it was a temporary relief, it would often help take my mind off of things and sometimes it was the only time i’d smile or laugh in an entire week. he was already such a comforting person to me, but it was only amplified every time he went live seeking the same feeling and i quickly found a lot of solace in the thought that we both seeked a familiar warmth for a while. i think a lot of people felt the same. i was seriously getting though the first half of the year thanks to the music the members were releasing and jk’s lives. that’s it. not much else was driving me forward.

then june 11th happened. that morning, i was woken up by my mom telling me my older sister was unresponsive in the hospital. i won’t go into specifics of what happened, but i ended up spending the whole day at home alone while the rest of my family rushed to the hospital. i couldn’t go with them. i knew i wasn’t going to be able to handle it and that made me feel absolutely riddled with guilt. instead, i spent hours in bed just waiting for text updates of what was going on, but they were few and far between. all i’d been told was that they were going to turn her life support off at some point in the day and i hadn’t heard anything after that for a few hours, so i didn’t know if it had happened yet or not for what felt like ages. i felt totally in the dark.

so i was laying there feeling numb, not doing anything but trying to reconcile with losing a sibling so soon and staring at my phone, willing news to come through but also praying it would stay silent. in my denial, silence meant what was happening wasn’t actually happening.

then that 🌟 JK live notif came through out of no where and i felt my heart literally stutter because there was just no fucking way. this was the first time i’d ever gotten that notif at that hour in my timezone. he rarely did morning lives, what on earth could he be doing? why now? why why why?

absolutely nothing in that moment was more important than my sister and what my family was experiencing, but there was literally nothing that i or anyone could do. i was helpless and unable to process the million thoughts and questions running through my head. in my desperate need for that familiar comfort, that distraction, i eagerly clicked the notif and was faced with those big, ridiculous brown eyes blinking at me sideways over the top of a blanket in his bed too. “you can’t be serious,” i said to my screen out loud and then i fucking laughed. incredulously, in disbelief, in amusement, in horror, in grief, in happiness, all of the above.

“how did you know?” i wanted to sob, but all i could do was keep laying there, practically comatose (for lack of a better word), as i watched who had steadily become what felt like my closest and dearest friend across the ocean tell me he wanted company falling asleep. it almost felt like a sick joke the universe was playing on me. like hey, you need a distraction from something really bad happening and it’s not gonna change a thing and it’s parasocial as fuck, but it’s literally the only thing that’s been working so far up until this point aka the lowest point. so here he is, the booooy.

anyway, he fell asleep. i finally rested my eyes. my thoughts calmed down for a brief while. frankly, at the risk of sounding insane, i felt like i was being looked after. supported? no, he had no clue. he was in dreamland and his arm was twitching. he hadn’t even said much after the first few minutes and once he passed out, all that mattered until it would inevitably be cut off was the fact that he was just… there.

my sister passed away not too long after the live was turned off. i wasn’t told until a couple hours later, but the fact is this: in the hour leading up to it, i was successfully distracted and i was comforted. of course, it didn’t last long but it had helped me in the moment i most needed it (again, but x10000) and i am forever in jungkook’s debt for those last few moments of solitude before my entire year was flipped on a permanent axis that day. i’m with one less sister and the grief has been insurmountable.

so i just wanna say if it’s seemed like i’ve been leaning a bit more on jungkook than usual this year, this is why. he’s just been an angel for me, quite literally. it’s also why i refuse to entertain any messages i receive slandering him for whatever reason or accusing me of favoring him over anyone else lately when that’s just not the case. i’m just trying to get by. i’m channeling my grief into my content, my creations, and in doing so, i am channeling my love and appreciation into what is getting me through it the most. so it’s a waste of time to twist it into something it isn’t and i’ll only ever give you a pity laugh and move on. none of the kpop industry jargon that people get mad about these days matters to me at all and life is too short to waste being angry about shit you can’t control. you don’t know what people are going through and you don’t know what someone means to someone else or why. so put your energy towards things that make you happy instead. you’ll feel better. i never owed an explanation, but there it is if you’ve been looking for one.

to wrap this up, i didn’t think i’d ever write any of this down and i could probably write essays just as long as this one for all the other members and what they did for me this year too. it’s going to be incredibly hard to see them go. my ult bias for-fucking-ever, my taehyung, i simply do not know how i’m going to get through my days without him. i just can’t picture or fathom it and i don’t fucking want to. he’s my favorite person in the world. i will be so empty with him gone. there are no words for how painful it’ll be so i’m not even gonna try to find them. my sweet jimin who also brings so much comfort and hilarity into my life, i simply cannot stomach the thought of him going away. my dear namjoon who i swear to god yanks my ass back up above water when i feel like i’m drowning in my feelings and inspires me to be better, what the hell am i gonna do? i’m already spiraling without yoongi’s tranquility. and of course, jungkook, who you now know has just been an incredibly special presence in my life this year. someone i’ve learned so much from, laughed with, cried with, eaten with, rested with, who showed up for me over and over and over and has no idea the impact he had, how grateful i am. i’ll never be able to thank him. thank you thank you thank you for being there for me. thank you all the members for fucking being there for me literally all the time.

this sucks! this sucks but i’m gonna power through it with the rest of you. i’m gonna try.

#tw death #turning reblogs off bc it’s just too personal to let circulate #but thank you for reading it you did

[laceratedlamiaceae]

What really gets me is that we basically never get to see Izzy in a safe environment. There are some brief moments that might count, depending on how you look at them (the "can't I just send the boys?" exchange in episode three and his ranting to Spanish Jackie in episode seven) but for the vast majority of his screen time he's constantly feeling threatened.

On top of the ever-present danger associated with piracy, he's on an unfamiliar ship surrounded by people he doesn't know. Sure, they're incompetent, but that doesn't mean they're harmless; that's why he's always trying to assert some kind of authority over them. (My take on his behavior in episodes five and nine is that he feels threatened by his lack of power on the Revenge and he's using the methods that used to work for him to establish some kind of control). He isn't even wrong to think they might pose a threat to him, given that they almost throw him overboard (as a result of his own actions, sure, but that's beside the point).

Stede is a threat to his already tenuous relationship with Ed, so he's never going to feel secure with him around. After Stede is gone, Ed decides to turn the Revenge into a floating circus, leaving them totally vulnerable to the British, the Spanish, other pirates, and pretty much everyone else. Obviously he doesn't respond well to that, given that he's been living in a state of constant anxiety for weeks (months?) and now the one person he clung to for safety has given up on the thing that kept them safe.

Anyways, that was a lot of rambling for me to say that I want to see Izzy feeling safe and secure. It probably wouldn't really serve the story at all but it would be so interesting to see what he would be like.

#if you judged me purely based on the times my anxiety was bad i'd seem like an asshole too #our flag means death #ofmd #izzy hands #ofmd meta #(kind of) #izzy apologist

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

I posted 541 times in 2022

That's 541 more posts than 2021!

317 posts created (59%)

224 posts reblogged (41%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@mikami1992

@im-totally-not-an-alien-2

@stealingyourbones

@ashoutinthedarkness

@maribatshipper

I tagged 443 of my posts in 2022

Only 18% of my posts had no tags

#danny phantom - 224 posts

#dp x dc - 209 posts

#fanfiction prompts - 197 posts

#prompts - 193 posts

#danny fenton - 190 posts

#batman - 104 posts

#the alien answers - 102 posts

#robin - 74 posts

#tim drake - 65 posts

#damian wayne - 65 posts

Longest Tag: 134 characters

#tim does not get coffee though and hes mad about it but he also really likes how the water in his tiny bird bath feels on his feathers

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Au where Danny somehow managed to wipe any proof of his existence from the face of the planet, including the memories people had of him. He tells himself this was fine. Better than fine actually.

This just means that his loved ones were less likely to get hurt in the crossfire. Also Vlad is now clueless as to why he's in Amity in the first place and as Mayor no less. He resigns within a week to go back to Wisconsin after three days of nonstop blathering from Jack.

Danny basically starts living in a lake in the woods, its not like he needs to breath and he finds the water calming. Also the fish are friendly. Plus there's a cave nearby if he needed to stay in human form for whatever reason.

He had water and shelter, down now he just needed access to food unless he wanted to eat his new fish friends.

This is when Danny learned he could use the weird magical girl ring to shape-shift into other people.

So he got into the habit of transforming into one of the residents of a house and raiding the pantries.

This turned out to be a pretty open secret amongst the people of Amity Park. They knew it was Phantom, primarily because he's a terrible liar but also because people have cell phones and communicate.

This is never really an issue since no one tells the Fentons or the Feds. At least, it wasn't an issue until the Justice League came sniffing around. The people of Amity have only become more untrusting of the government as years passed and became equally as protective over thier local ghostboy. So everytime they came around no one but the Fentons would say anything to them other than, "Leave." Or "You're not wanted here." Before walking away.

It was a day like any other for Phantom. Some teens had rented out a house in town, likely to experience the most haunted town in America. Whatever. Teens always bring the best snacks.

So he transformed into the cute redheaded guy right after they left and walked past the living room towards the kitchen like he's done a dozen times before.

"Uh, Wally?" Dannys head whipped around to see the black haired teen sitting on the couch, his blue eyes wide with shock and worry. The one with a Superman t-shirt on. "Are you ok? Your heartbeat is really slow."

Danny could only think of one word to sum up this situation. Fuuuuuckk

3,268 notes - Posted June 13, 2022

#4

Au where all the ghosts hide thier real names on instinct, not only because knowing a ghosts name gives you power over them but because you could use thier name to potentially find thier grave through magic or Google.

Once you find thier bones there's no shortage of what you could do.

Due to the nature of Embers obsession she isn't able to hide her name and during a fight she reveals to Phantom she lives in a constant state of anxiety fearing someone might find her body and use it against her

Phantom knocks on her door a week later with not only her body but her entire casket floating behind him. She's oddly touched. This is probably the nicest thing anyone has ever done for her. Word, of course, spreads of this and other spirits ask him to do the same for them and are willing to make deals

Another week later Batman is investigating all the robbed graves and trying to figure out wtf is going on

Edit: Yes the removal of the caskets cause the graves to sink in and thats how Batman is alerted to the issue. I had left this as an implication but felt the need to clarify due to people talking about it in the notes.

Edit 2: You could also have a grave keeper see Phantom stealing caskets and alert authorities. Whats more this is likely happening in more than just Gotham. You could also have another ghost/ a magic user see this super powerful spirit robbing graves and being like, "Well that seems ominous. I should tell someone about that."

Please forgive me for adding more, I have no control over myself

3,286 notes - Posted June 29, 2022

#3

Au where Danny ends up in Gotham and gets saved by the birds while in human form. He starts pseudo haunting them before returning to Amity Park.

He frequently pops back in to Gotham to invisibility give gifts to the batfam.

Dick gets circus themed things that seem to move around the manor when no one is looking.

Stephanie and Tim both get comics, manga and movies from different dimensions and its only once they start looking up fandoms/ going on Twitter do they realize that these manga/movies apparently don't exist.

The same thing happens with Jason and books. The weird part is that after he finishes reading one of the books for the nth time, (the ones that he and Duke swears glow) and finally retires it to the shelf they disappear. This only happens with the glowey books though. He gets to keep the others

Damian keeps getting new swords, which everyone but him has a problem with.

Duke keeps getting things that activate his powers and he can't really make heads or tails from most of it.

Cass gets lots of soft things like stuffed animals that are nice for hugs and other sensory reasons and dance stuff. Her favorite so far is a gigantic bat in a tutu.

Barbara and Tim (he gets double i guess) both get tech stuff that they've never seen before and make a hobby of reverse engineering the new product of the week.

Alfred gets all sorts of gag gifts like an apron that says "I'm the real boss here" and a mug that has a fancy mustache on the bottom that matches his real one

Bruce gets almost exclusively much bat themed gifts.

No one is sure where the stuff is coming from (and in Jason's case where its going) but they all assume its someone else in the family doing it because its themed around both thier hero and thier personal interests. It finally comes to a head when the batfam are all out together when they come home to find a beautiful and ornate sword laying on the kitchen table for Damian and they all simultaneously realize no one had been home to put it there.

Alfred gets the shotgun while everyone else enters detectives mode.

Danny himself doesn't even realize the extent in which he's been messing with them and doesn't really think past the, "I hope they like their gifts" thing.

3,345 notes - Posted July 15, 2022

#2

Au where Danny gets deaged by a magical artifact in the GZ and gets lost in a different dimension with Cujo. While exploring Gotham as Phantom he decides to play up the little kid routine and use his puppy friend to do it.

At this point Danny had finally trained the pup and he actually listened to him. Needless to say there's a certain flock of bats and birds who keep pestering him at night. All he's trying to do is explore the city and play with his dog. Is that so bad?

Danny doesnt usually bother hiding from them. Not much point considering he shines like a spotlight in Gothams gloom anytime he's in his phantom form. Plus Cujo is glowy and green, so that doesn't help matters.

Danny usually runs them on a wild goose chase in the name of "Tag" before disappearing. He stole Batmans cape by phasing it off of him and he now uses it as a blanket at night (its surprisingly warm), he stole another one at Red Hoods request and gave it to him, he's set up play dates between Cujo and Harleys hyenas, he's pied Joker in the face, he's pet Penguins pet penguins right in front of him, he's been trapped in an elevator with Brucie Wayne for two hours, he's had a tea party with Catwomans cats and may have broken into her apartment to do it, he's kidnapped Red Robin and made him go to the park and play on the swings with him, he's gotten into actual fights with Robin and last but not least, he came up with the Puppy Paw of Approval.

---

Nightwing stared at the kid they had been chasing every other night for the last three months now, confused. "Whats the Puppy Paw of Approval?"

The kid moved the puppy, Cujo (which Jason finds hilarious) up in front of his face, holding him there by his armpits.

The dog was making the "no thoughts head empty" face with his tongue sticking out just a smidge. Dick was tempted to coo. "The Puppy Paw of Approval is an award! Arf!" The kid said in a higher pitched pretend voice.

"Its awarded to people we really really like! Arf!"

Nightwing gasped dramatically, playing along with the boy, "You really like me that much?"

"Of course!" The boy floated over to Dick and places one of the dogs paws on the man's chest. "Da da da daaa!" The kid sang, "You now have the Puppy Paw of Approval!"

The vigilante sniffled, "I will always cherish this! Thank you!"

The kid giggled and Cujo barked at him. The little green rottweiler panted up at him with a giants smile and his little nub tail wagging a mile and minute.

God, Nightwing couldn't wait for his newest little brother to join the family.

Dick was dismayed to learn he was actually the second person to get the PPA. The first being Tim, the third being Harley and the forth being Catwoman. Ivy was apparently salty about not getting one but the kid was scared of her for some reason.

Danny makes friends with lots of people throughout the city. Scarecrow learns of the bats recruitment attempts on this boy and decides to use the fear toxin on him. This has the unexpected outcome of making the child cry.

And then the whole city was out for his head.

3,508 notes - Posted August 11, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Theres a new mom and pop coffee shop in Gotham that's doing pretty well. The place has a casual playful vibe but it only ever has one employee, which has lead to it having a bit of a urban myth status.

He's there through all the opening hours and no one ever sees him come or go, only the lights switching off and the teen disappearing.

It probably doesn't help that the shop has a ghost themed name.

His name tag reads, "Nightingale" and he always has a polite smile, but the few who dare to act out in his shop notice his eyes flash a particular shade of green and are suddenly overcome with the feeling that they're being stared down by a large apex predator and a sickening sense of dread.

Needless to say people behave in his shop.

Whats more is that his store shows up on county records just fine, but if you try to look into anything your computer glitches out and you can't find anything. Obviously "Nightingale" can't be the owner, he looks only 15. Some say he's a vampire, others say he's a zombie like Red Hood.

Tim doesn't care what he is because the first time he entered at night as Red Robin the guy immediately started making a coffee were he could see, made it exactly how he liked it and gave it to him before he even had the chance to order. Then he refused his money, saying it was on the house.

None of the people waiting in line argued or were upset and Tim was unsure if that was because he was a well known Gotham vigilante or it Nightingales reputation protected him.

Either way the coffee was delicious.

Tim didn't know how to feel when he found out his family was investigating the "possible runaway" who worked at the coffee shop.

3,554 notes - Posted November 10, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[stranger-rants]

I headcanon Billy’s academic success as being a sort of up-and-down journey for him, and this is mainly because of his CPTSD. He does strike me as someone who is ‘naturally smart’ because he’s had to be in order to survive. Graduating is part of the survival plan. If he can’t do that, it will be that much harder to leave. At the same time, CPTSD can be so disruptive to learning that students can get a 504 plan for it nowadays. For Billy, I think his CPTSD could manifest in inconsistent performance on academic tasks. He may do well on assignments, but then bomb a test due to overwhelming anxiety. He may be motivated to graduate, but then self-sabotage in school after an incident with his dad rocks his faith in his ability to reach that goal.

There’s also the fact that the move to Hawkins was disorienting. He may not struggle socially, but he has to start over in a new building with new teachers. They don’t know him, and they could easily mistake his lack of effort or daytime sleepiness for complete apathy when in all likelihood living with his father keeps him sleep deprived and his body in a constant state of stress. There will be other times when Billy tries very hard in school to distract himself from his home life, and he gets good grades as a result. He doesn’t do it for Neil, though I’m sure bringing home bad grades is a problem. Then there will be times when he can’t come to school because Neil got too rough with him. So he misses instruction and assignments. When he returns, the amount of work he’s got to catch up on is another stressor.

I think Billy could be the top of his class if he wasn’t regularly abused or suffering from CPTSD, but I can totally see him zoning out during instruction because he’s replaying arguments with his father in his head or his brain and body mistake academic rigor for danger, so he is not always able to maintain great academic performance despite being very smart underneath it all.

#billy hargrove

[andromebaa]

It was Ren’s birthday on the leap day and I forgot all about her lol sorry sweetie.

- She’s a total mess because she lives in constant fear of becoming like her isolated, weird mother, Toko and/or/not really sure for sure Genocider.

- Despite her anxiety and general skittishness, she’s great with children. Her SHSL talent would be as a caretaker.

-She cut off her hair after a mental breakdown. She used a knife, for obvious reasons. In a happier state I’d imagine she had long, luscious locks. Same with her clothing choice too - she’d probably wear more feminine clothing but she restricts herself in order to appear more mature/reliable.

- She has a strained, complicated relationship with Byakuya. This is mostly due to the unfortunate circumstances of her existence. She was raised by the other original students. I think Chihiro was probably her biggest influence.

- She’s a fantastic sewer and likes to make soft toys in her spare time.

- She’s very clingy and will get attached to anyone who is nice or kind to her. She doesn’t like being the centre of attention though.

- Ren used to be best friends with Daiya as kids before The Incident (tm) which kind of solidified their older personalities and their general dislike of each other.

- Unlike many of the other Legacy students, she is opposed to escaping. She’s afraid of the outside world and wants what is best for the younger children.

#despair's legacy #danganronpa oc #danganronpa fankid #danganronpa au

[andmyvape]

You know...

People talk about drugs like if you give someone who wants them whatever drug they're asking for in whatever amount they're asking for, they'll become hopelessly addicted and ruin their lives

Now I'm not arguing that addiction isn't fucking awful but I fervently believe those in the newer circles of rehabilitative care theory that are putting forward the idea that addiction, at its core, is self medication. Unregulated, self destructive self medication in too many cases, but it's not the drugs themselves in so many cases, huffing paint thinner and other examples not withstanding, but honestly I don't think people would do that if they had alternatives that ARE less damaging.

It's the pain and lack of support that drives so many people to alleviate their pain or stress which really is just pain too by numbing it with drugs. It helps, but they don't regulate, they don't find alternatives to cope with whatever they're medicating that lighten the need for the medication alone, their tolerance builds up, they don't know what they're medicating enough to know how to do that consciously and more safely...

It's a nightmare that is truly systemic, not some moral failing or some contagion inherent to the human spirit. I can't currently think of any example of an organism that wouldn't practice homeostasis when outside of whatever range of normal function they're supposed to be in. Not for some philosophical or spiritual reason, in this sense specifically it is purely biological, and I find it to be DEEPLY disturbing that so many people I encounter in my life INSIST that being in constant discomfort is somehow a state to aspire to and be proud of. Being able to safely handle exiting a space that would provide you homeostasis means being able to MAINTAIN that homeostasis when you go elsewhere or do other things. It's NOT about giving in to the idea that if you prefer to be comfortable that you are somehow weak or inferior. That is not a mark of strength, it's a mark of how damaged a person is.

Grandpa, stop ranting about my generation not wanting to be "triggered" you literally JUST threw a hissy fit because they didn't have your slim jims at the corner store and the cashier wouldn't give it to you for free. Your comfort is predicated on unfairly demanding behaviors from others that is not being reciprocated in a worthwhile way. I don't think that's more valid than my being upset that a man who claims to love me is more interested in mocking a caricature of a trans person that isn't actually me. But I digress

The point my adhd ass is making here is that I think I understand a bit more about what I've been arguing this entire time. Not that I didn't understand it at all before so much as that I've been given new depth. I have a pain condition, possibly multiple, have my entire life, and I have always been rather fixated on whatever would alleviate that pain. When Tylenol stopped working, I stopped using it. Eventually I found marijuana which has done me WONDERS but I've been dealing with worsening health issues due to various reasons and it's not quite doing enough. I had to be taken off all my meds because of a bad interaction and in the month before we start reintegrating meds that might help, my doctor gave me benadryl

Now, I've been taking benadryl on and off for years for anxiety and insomnia. I can't do it long, some toxicity issue I think? Or organ failure. Can't remember right now. The guideline is a two week limit, and I've found by the end of that two weeks it is very hard for me to get the effect I need without running into the 300mg daily cap. And the times I've taken it before it hasn't done much but make me sleep eventually and relax for a few hours

That has changed. Now when I take my benadryl, I can feel it kick in like God Herself just grabbed me by the scruff of the neck, total limpness, the anxiety isn't GONE but it's so much more manageable. The cessation of pain is so fucking nice, which I understand is a HUGE component of addiction outside of the direct chemical alterations over time becoming unpleasant or downright agonizing to reverse. Being so uncomfortable and having it relieved that quickly is amazing. It doesn't make the problem that is causing me the stress or pain go away, but it does give me clarity of mind that lets me take action to make my life better, for myself and my loved ones

Now here's the kicker for me. I HAVE taken benadryl before, but when I did, my conditions were so unmanaged that it just really did not do THIS much. And at that time, I very much required things that were stronger, for both pain and mental distress. I was given them after some hospitalizations, begrudgingly, and surprise of surprises it helped me. I started to improve. Pretty significantly. Years later, they started making me sick, thus the meds having to be changed now, and honestly I was TERRIFIED because I thought the benadryl wouldn't be enough, like it was before, and I'd spend a month in agony. I was so wrong yall

So here's what I think, in my amateurishly educated opinion: if they had just given me the medicine I was asking for instead of taking my agency away in denying my medication that could have helped but could also have consequences that they felt weren't worth the risk. Maybe they were, maybe there weren't, but... Shouldn't that have been my choice? And I did eventually get put on something stronger, which led to me having the strength and spoons and clarity I needed to make changes over time that have led to me being able to be helped by the benadryl now. They couldn't have just handed me a bottle of percocet at 14 and said "Good luck!" because YES that would have been it's own kind of damaging, but I have trouble with authority, and at least the damage would have been mine to cause. After all, it was my body

But... What they could have done, what research is proving again and again ACTUALLY works more than patriarchal denial of bodily autonomy on the basis of my supposed "inherently and deeply lacking ability to make choices for my own health," is just... Giving me the meds I asked for. Tell me the risks, help me manage the potential consequences, trust me to tell you when I feel sick instead of functional. To not just keep taking more and more of whatever drug that is helping me but you've decided I'm having FUN with, to the point that being denied the care I needed was damaging. If you had trusted me, I would have trusted you, and we could have made a plan that would have probably resulted in what's happened now, me finding that benadryl actually is enough now and crying in sheer joy that I've finally worked hard enough to get this far

But that would have implied that I have an ability and right to make decisions about how to take care of my own body, right?

This isn't a story that hasn't been experienced and shared so many times that it all paints a detailed and disturbing tapestry of how little bodily autonomy matters in this system. Too many demographics are judged as being "at risk for addiction" without the judgement being made by people who care that those demographics are at risk because of so fucking many social and systemic inequalities that leave so fucking many deprived of preventative, proactive care that would ultimately ease the burden of emergency care that has to be given once things get to a point considered "bad enough" and that's just... Not okay.

#Mental health #Chronic pain #Addiction #This is a broken system #Lack of emphasis on bodily autonomy is one of the cores of this festering boil #I'm gonna grab a giant needle and start stabbing #Who's with me?

[genderdisaster]

Who am I? A meditation on identity, gender, presentation, and bad cooking metaphors.

"Who are you?"

It's a long story. Frankly, I don't know. And that's ok. "Who am I?" is the question that I have asked myself more than ever in the past six months. After the initial euphoria, triumph, anxiety, and elation of starting HRT, I began to reexamine myself and my identity. I was crafting a new version of myself based on what felt the most authentic for me, and I needed to understand what felt most real. I was starving, and that first dose of Estrogen felt like sitting down at a massive banquet. I only needed to decide what to try first.

"Hey, what's good here?"

I've always had some problem with identity. Most of my life, with some small exceptions, I've made an effort to blend in and appear as unobtrusive as possible. Masculine enough to not draw attention or be singled out, but also neutral enough to remain non-threatening. At the core, I didn't have a clear sense of identity that felt in-line with how I really resonated deep inside. To some degree, I still don’t. Instead, I had a sense that I needed to portray quiet competence and self-assuredness in relation to the rigid structures of masculinity--as if any sign of compensation or questioning would betray just how clueless and out of place I really was. An impostor. I based my identity on interests or passions, never on a simple state of being. A male identity? No more than the thing I'd study to fit in when shared interests couldn't bridge the conversational gap. No more than another hobby, and one I didn't particularly even enjoy. But now I stumbled onto something new, and with it a new sense of self; where would I begin to develop this new, embodied, genuine identity?

"Everything is good here. Just try something and see if you like it!"

That didn't feel right. A lifetime of all-or-nothing thinking meant that I was seeking an objective "truth" about what identity should look like. I had made it over thirty years into life, dammit. I should know this by now!

Little did I know, I started to become embroiled in a full-blown identity crisis. I was shifting from a repressed, quietly desperate life of self-loathing and feeling deeply uncomfortable in the body I was born into, into a slowly changing body that every day grew more aligned with my inner state. More like home. But what kind of home?

"I'll have what she's having, then."

I've been fortunate to find myself in several different trans and gender-diverse groups of wonderful people throughout my life. Many friends, loved ones, trained professionals, and kind strangers helped to take this ignorant and denial-ridden egg and gently pry the first pieces of shell away from my tough outer-exterior. Still, I found myself looking at all of the new possibilities in front of me with a sense of overwhelm.

Am I a trans woman? I certainly don't prefer masculinity. But do I identify with binary femininity? Not totally that either. Demasculinization remained my primary goal for early transition, and every small sign of dropping Testosterone was a tiny victory over the weird guy who used to inhabit this body. I still cared for and loved him, but he never wanted to be in running things in the first place; now he didn't have to. We 86'd masculinity, Estrogen was on expo, but who was keeping it all in line?

"Take what you want, leave what you don't. Here's your salad fork."

I soon began to struggle with the ongoing need to remind myself of some basic concepts on a constant basis. Things like "It's ok to try things out and see if you like them or not!" and "You don't need to have it all figured out yet! The right people will accept you regardless!" became regular mantras that I repeated throughout the day. Like it or not, I started to re-live my awkward teenage years of trying out aspects of identity and personality to see what felt right, but in a less-traumatized, more mindful, and (most importantly) more self-compassionate mental state. I'm still doing that, and will be for some time to come. I "figured out" the recipe for masculinity by adulthood, more or less by following an easily repeatable formula that was bland, yet filling, and sticking to it at the expense of my own humanity. This new, undetermined third thing that I am creeping towards? That recipe is yet to be written, and it's all up to me. Each ingredient represents an aspect, a quality, another little piece of presentation and joy that feels right when seeing the person staring back at me in the mirror, or feeling myself living my life in my body. I relish the thought of working on the "me" that will be totally present and there for myself and others--all the while, folding in enough feminine energy to build a strong base, and allowing a sprinkle of masculinity as garnish in his own special way. A delicate balance with no flavor overpowering the other.

Luckily, I'm a damn good cook. At least I hope I am.

#gender #lgbtq #blogging #nonbinary #trans #transgender #enby #trans hrt #transitioning #trans experience #trans joy

[purplefiction-ao3]

I don’t want to be a downer but I need to vent. I want to rest but my body demands attention.

I’ve had more tonic-clonic seizures in 2024 so far than I had in all of 2021/2022/2023 combined. Which means no driving, which = less independence.

My lung function is so poor and it’s putting a lot of stress on my heart, which stresses me out more because I’m so scared of rejection or cardiac arrest.

The thing is though, I’m so tired. I’m tired of being in pain. I’m in a constant state of high stress and anxiety because I’m struggling to breathe and constantly feeling air hunger.

My doctor has officially uttered the words I’ve been fearful of. If I can’t find a doctor willing to try one more tracheal reconstruction surgery (I’ve had 3, none have really improved the situation other than buying me more time🥴), the only option to improve “quality of life” will be to get another tracheostomy.

My first tracheostomy experience was traumatic for the couple of years I had it. To be told I’m looking at a permanent trach feels life altering in a way so many other medical things I’ve experienced weren’t.

The way people treated me when I was trached and vent dependent was awful. Totally invisible. My voice is already so weak and gives out easily, I’m scared I’ll permanently lose the ability to talk.

I’m grateful for medicine and my heart transplant and all of the extra time I’ve been given. But… I just need a break. I just wish I could have a break from my broken body once in a while.

No need to worry, I’m not suicidal or anything. Just contemplating mortality and wondering at what point I just need to stop with the medical interventions and let my body do it’s thing. I have a DNR that applies in certain situations and a living will but still.

This wont be the medical intervention I refuse though, if I chose to stop medical interventions. If a trach and vent are necessary for me to not feel like I’m struggling to breathe, I’ll do it. If there is one way I don’t want to die, it’s suffocating to death. Severe air hunger and the inability to breathe unassisted ranks as maybe the #1 worst things I’ve ever experienced.

So, let this serve as my current life update and as an explanation why updates for my WIP on AO3 may be slow. I’ve had three massive seizures just this weekend and I’m feeling all around sick, depressed, and too weak to even lift my own head up. I’ve relied on caregivers for all of my basic needs these past 3 or 4 days. Hopefully, once I can hold my own head up and change positions without doubling over in severe pain again, I’ll be able to get the next chapter out in a reasonable amount of time. Mostly I’m hoping to avoid a hospital stay and I’m hoping I won’t end up with an emergency trach this week. I want to be able to make this decision not under duress this time.

Good thoughts, vibes, and even prayers (if that’s your thing) are so appreciated. I need all of the encouragement possible right now.

#wolfstar #ao3 #chronic illness #tracheostomy #epilepsy #terminal illness #but not really cause I never die just keep getting saved #but really I am still considered terminal #fuck fuck fuck #i’m okay #just feeling so many things #dying is really fucking painful #wolfstar fanfiction #is the only thing that even kind of helps turn off the sadness

[newpathwrites]

Just reflecting on an interaction with a mutual/friend yesterday on things coming into your life when you need them.

In 2019 when The Mandalorian came out, I was in a deep depression, stuck in a toxic situation that I didn’t know how to get out of, trying desperately to protect my kids, and having a massive identity and sexuality crisis as I faced the damage done to my psyche over nearly two decades of abuse. I was a shell of a person, barely surviving, just living in a constant state of fear and anxiety.

Was Din a hyperfixation, a distraction? Absolutely. But that distraction gave me distance from my overwhelming situation. And that distance allowed me to think and focus on myself outside of the toxicity. I’ve wasted a lot of time on Din, honestly, my ADHD is totally decompensated right now, my life is a mess. But I finally gathered the courage to pull myself and my kids to safety.

It may sound childish to some to say a fictional character got me through bad times as a firmly middle aged woman, but it is 100% true that I wouldn’t have gotten here without Din and Pedro and this fandom to soothe my mind.

I recognize now other periods of my life where hyperfixations took hold - I needed them in those times, and they faded when I didn’t. Here’s hoping I hold on to Din for awhile, though☺️

So anyway, hyperfixate without shame, friends. I hope it brings you peace as it has me. And thank you for fangirling along with me and giving me the community that was always missing in my younger days when despair brought me to this place of fictional obsession. It has been a true pleasure.

#again I’m still in my dramatic era so forgive me #personal post #tw relationship abuse

[thelioncourts]

I mean are they gonna completely get rid of all those characters lestat hooks up with though? I think what’s causing all this anxiety about Jacob on the show is that you can’t really keep most of the storylines from the books and NOT have him be a supporting player at best. All these stories are about Lestat and his ho of the month. Either that or they scrap a lot of stuff in the books post TVL. Also it was the initial casting call that says Louis was a 2 season role vs lestat 5. Way before Jacob was ever cast. Also personally I’d rather he leave the show so I can stop watching then see him get pushed to the side and only show up one episode a season to be exasperated w/ Lestat.

I know you probably intended for a lot of this to be rhetorical and/or more of a general talking point, and I want to first point out that I totally get where you're coming from, and I next want to point out that if my answer here isn't extremely detailed, it's because I do feel like most of what I have had to say I have already said. I don't -- I don't actually know anything, I'm making guesses (educated ones, mind you! but guesses nonetheless) and am doing so with optimism because I simply have to for my own sanity.

What I will say about "Lestat and his ho of the month" stuff is that in a mostly complete (but not totally complete) list of Lestat's loves that I made on the last list (Nicki, Gabrielle, Louis, Akasha, David, Dora, Gretchen, Rowan, Antoine), we know that Nicki is dead; Nicki is in the past and while his story will be told, it's over. Antoine is Antoinette, we know that fate, and, as I said in the previous asks, whatever weird stuff Lestat has with his mom will (most likely) not be explored on a romantic level given the audience and network. That leaves us with Louis, Akasha, David, Dora, Gretchen, and Rowan really.

We know Louis. Love of Lestat's life. Soulmate. His muse!

Akasha is going to happen in a non-romantic, no doubt horrific, way.

Dora and Gretchen are not important. I don't say that trying to be mean or whatever, but they simply are not important. The stories they are part of can truly happen without them and I feel like it would be a waste of television time to try to work in their minor roles.

Rowan, as I stated in the last ask, is something Anne says she regrets. I hope, out of respect for Anne and for good storytelling, they don't even consider it. I also, however, have far less faith in Mayfair continuing long enough to ever even get to that point though so...

And then there's David. David is only important in TVC for his contributions of storytelling the other vampires' lives. There have already been a lot of theories that David won't ever come to exist within the show and his work will be relegated to Daniel and/or Louis as a means of keeping Eric in the show as well as Jacob. I think it would make more sense to give most to Daniel and work it from there, but either way, I hope these theories hold some truth and I never have to actually see David Talbot and that mess on screen.

I also think there is a lot to have Louis be part of if they choose to. Louis is always in Lestat's life, even when Anne was pushing him to the side, and I don't think it would be hard to make him a constant. I also have a theory that Trinity Gate (the place Louis lives with Armand at for, like, almost 15 years in the book and he's away from Lestat during) is sort of what we're witnessing in Dubai and, therefore, is not yet another era of separation for Loustat. Again, just a theory, but one based in educated guesses.

I could go on as to what I think Louis may be up to in later seasons, but I truly don't really know. I feel like we'll all have a better idea post-season 2, but I really do believe we're going to have him long-term. I wouldn't just be saying that if I didn't believe it. In fact, if there's one thing I believe above all else, I believe that this show cannot succeed without both Sam and Jacob. They are both amazing and beautiful actors individually, but together they are something else entirely and people will notice the lack of it and people will be upset by it should it not be in the show.

As for your last bit, I didn't know the original contracts were like that; I think it makes sense, I get why they did it, and I can talk about that too. But I also don't think Rolin Jones is going to say all he did without intention of backing it up, especially because the fandom is loud enough to call that shit out were it to happen.

And lastly, I do agree; if the show were to sideline Louis dramatically in the way the books do, I would also want Jacob to go somewhere where he's appreciated and his talents are being used and he can show off his beautiful skills and face. But I also truly believe the show wants to utilize him as an actor and see the worth of him. I do. And I hope I'm right there because to be proven wrong would be a devastation.

[nexus-nebulae]

Hate Hate Hate "problematic" culture where everything has to be bad in some way because i see one post with a 14 year old calling something random "problematic" but because i have no context i just get a random panic over whether this thing i thought was totally innocent is actually horrible and now i just live in a state of literal constant anxiety about the things i like

#its wonderful and totally not a fucking paralysing and suffocating way to live my life and experience the things i enjoy #seriously i saw One Fucking Single post calling genderbending as a concept 'problematic' #like. how!!! how is it fucking problematic!!!! that's how i figured out i was fucking trans i dont understand #i hear 'its problematic' but with no context i just spiral into a panic of What Part Of This Is Bad Oh God #because i Hate Hate Hate having moments where i'm being an asshole without realising it at all #saying things i don't realise are bad and hurting peoples feelings without knowing i said something wrong #because im fucking autistic!!! and i do that a lot!!!!!! and i never know when im fucking doing it #because nobody explains shit to me they just say 'that's bad!!!!!' with no explanation #so i never fucking know how to feel about fucking anything #what do i need to think or say without getting screamed at for being different from everyone else #i just have to be fucking terrified of everything all the time because everything at any second could be a landmine #i just want people to chill the fuck out and calm down and let me FUCKING RELAX