#i love bread but damn

[deep-sea-anemone]

Yes, yes, Sanji letting Zoro help in the kitchen by letting him chop vegetables because he's good with pointy objects.

BUT. Have you considered?

They live in a world without most electrical appliances. A FUCKTON of physical labor goes into baking (and keep in mind how often Sanji bakes treats for the girls).

Sanji being tired (physically) and not feeling like taking 10 min to whip whipped cream. Being tired (mentally) of Zoro making fun of him for never working out. Sanji saying "fuck it" and just starts putting him to work.

The foccacia dough needs to be kneaded? "Have fun working a sticky mess for 20 minutes, asshole"

Need meringue? "No, STIFF peaks marimo. Don't tell me you're wimping out already"

"Are you even TRYING to flatten that steak Marimo?"

"Yes, it needs whipped cream. YES, I know you just made some yesterday. We need more"

Zoro's shoulders are burning but he's trying SO HARD not to lose face with the cook and meanwhile Sanji is silently losing it at Zoro's shock that cooking can in fact be a workout

#zosan #sanji #zoro #strawhats #op #one piece #this post brought to you by my burning shoulders #i love bread but damn #also i have made whipped cream by hand before #yes it was a complete pain. #would not recommend #i think im gonna start tagging these posts #maybe..... #anime posting #? #good as anything for now i guess #...ok i realize schnitzel isnt baking but my point still stands #also #rereading this #beating meat #stiff #sticky mess #good lord there's just a whole host of innuendo here #obviously this could be platonic too i just automatically tag it as zosan

[lilybug-02]

The actual reason they ditched Chara.

Fan-art because I can draw. And I um.. kinda really love @akanemnon‘s comic…

Kind of a minicomic below…

Please forgive me. I’ve had this in my head forever and just wanted to share my AU meeting yours. That is my Final message. Goodbye. 🫡 jumping in this hole now 🕳️🚶‍♀️

#twin runes #all that good stuff #hnksdjnvkjsdnvojsdn I love your art style. like it’s so good and consistent???? like damn #it’s so professional looking. I’m always so impressed #and your comedic series really is amazing. I love the plot and setting and everything about it #um sorry I’m gonna get too fan girlie. have a good day #bread #art #my art #chara #frisk #kris #Susie #mini comic #deltarune chara timeline #lol

[coldbasementruins]

I love how Kazuki was immediately endeared to Miri at their first meeting because he felt like the work he put on making food was actually validated, unlike with Rei because that man is dry as hell-

And when I saw this, I really thought it would be a recurring thing, but in the second episode, they hit me with THIS.

She fucking obliterated his enthusiasm💀

Bonus: This bitch laughing at his partner's pain.

#relatable king #get this man some damn compliments #the food he makes looks so good though #i would love to eat that shit #especially the bread thing #Kazuki Kurusu #Rei Suwa #Miri Unasaka #Buddy Daddies

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

got so into my laughingstock feels that i burnt my fuckign toast

#shit was Black #literally was in my kitchen Wailing about them and forgot the bread slices i put in the toaster oven three seconds prior #s'ok i made a new set but oughhhhhh i am still sooooooo so unwell about them.... #OUGHHHHHHH THEMMMMMMM #theyre just... snf.... theyre just two silly goofy guys in love.... #silly goofy fruity fellas and they love each other <3 #SIDE NOTE GINGER SPREAD ON HONEY/BUTTER TOAST ABSOLUTELY FUCKS TRUST ME ON THIS #absolutely unprompted #but yea i was specifically thinking about that fic i have in my head #yall know the one by now. the one i desperately want to write and I SWEAR I WILL EVENTUALLY #but the fuckin... Misunderstanding... it makes me insaneeeee #its the most unhealthy part of their relationship AND THEY ARENT EVEN IN A RELATIONSHIP YET #damn theyre so healthy. theyre so. wails screams howls #but howdy being an oblivious idiot to his own emotions is so important to me #mans is whip smart & quick in every other area #but in this One Subject hes dumb as a rock & that hurts both of them <3 #but it also turns into something they can cry w/ laughter over later #someone asks how they got together. they exchange a look. and burst out howling #full on wheeze-laughing Cannot Form Words #y'see most couples would have some lingering 'i cant believe you did that' and/or guilt #but barn & howdy would just find it hysterical. full on 'remember when you-' 'yeah lmfao' #THEYRE SOOOOOO <3 #yknow if i ever find someone i want to have a partner-esque relationship. i want to have what laughingstock has #i do genuinely believe that howdy might have feelings for barn #but i like to live in the delusional world of my mind where they're Established <3 #grabbing them and slamming them together like a violent 5 yr old playing with dolls #kiss! kiss damn you!

[becca-e-barnes]

I just gotta say, sub!pornstar!bucky

I have simply passed away.

I have been thinking about this for days, I need to write about it so my head will let it go

Just the thought of coming home to Bucky filming a scene with a dildo that's stuck to the wall by a suction cup. You didn't think he'd still be filming when you got home so you know he must really be enjoying himself if he's still going.

You hear his whimpers before you've even crossed the threshold. He's moaning like he does when he's beautifully overstimulated and he's quickly on his way to those broken sobs you love so much.

A hot throb settles in the pit of your stomach. You're not sure how you're supposed to just sit here and wait for him to finish, not when he sounds like that. But then you remember it's web-cam day. He'll be live-streaming and that gives him a little more wiggle room with his scenes.

"Bucky, sweetheart?" You call into the apartment, knowing that if he wants you to join him he'll respond.

You can imagine the look on his pretty, blissed out face just from the groan that resounds from the bedroom.

"F-Fuck, mommy?" Oh, he's in that headspace today. A pleasant tingle runs up your spine at the realisation all those people on the livestream heard him admit to being yours. They know he's owned. They might be getting off on whatever delightful display of submission he's letting them see but ultimately, he's yours and he wants to be.

You pad down the hallway quickly, discarding your jacket on the way. The bedroom door wasn't fully closed, swinging open with a gentle press and the sight in front of you is just breathtaking.

Bucky is on his hands and knees, with the camera at a 45 degree angle to his face . He's letting his viewers see the way he works himself on that cock but they still get to see the fucked out look in those pretty eyes. Better still, he gets to read the comments. All those strangers degrading him, calling him a filthy slut, taunting him that he'll be in trouble if he doesn't cum in the next few minutes.

He loves this. Clearly. If the pool of cum splattered across the wooden floor is anything to judge by.

"M-mommy?" His voice is weak and feeble, his cheeks are flushed, his dick looks achingly hard, bobbing as he continues to fuck himself on the toy.

"Oh baby, are you being slutty for all these nice people?" You coo, stepping into the focus of the camera, knowing that it will only see your legs, given the angle.

The chat floods with messages faster than ever. Some tell you your Bucky has been a little whore, some tell you he hasn't been slutty enough, some tell you they want to watch you punish him. Each message only seems to send your sweet boy a little more stupid and it's delightful.

"You've cum everywhere. Did all these people get to watch you fuck yourself stupid? I bet you didn't even touch your dick, did you? I know you just fucked your own ass until you came all over yourself. That's pathetic, baby."

This is Heaven for him. His head lolls forward onto his forearms, pleasure making him almost boneless but you can't have that. Absolutely not.

Your fingers tangle in his hair, pulling his face back up and making him look right down the camera. "Good boy, that's it. Let them see you. Show them that pretty face." His dick twitches, threatening to blow another load over the floor and he knows it.

"I'm gonna cum. Holy shit, I'm s-so close." His eyes roll back in his head and fuck, he's perfect like this. He's breathtaking and it's going to be great for views.

"Don't you dare. You cum when we tell you to." You remind him, dragging his attention back to the rolling chat. Half are keen to watch him cum right then and there and the other half want you to draw it out a little longer. Unfortunately for Bucky, you're leaning towards the latter.

#asks answered <3 #stevekempscocktails #becca writes spice #sub!bucky #sub!ps!bucky #ps!bucky #I LOVED writing this #I really want to bake a cute little loaf cake rn #I found a recipe for a raspberry and lemon loaf cake #and I want to bake it #but I don't like cake #no one in my house would eat it #I'm going to run away to a cottage in the forest and bake my own bread #and grow my own vegetables #I could make butter for my bread too #I could bring Belle #lol I know damn well I'd be in my cottage for a week before I'd be bored #but it's a nice thought rn idk

[rexscanonwife]

SCREAMING good morning everyone I showed my coworker a picture of Charles calling him the new fictional man I'm obsessed with and she said EW 😂😂 followed by "I would be so scared for you if you were straight"

How are YOU??

#jane journals #self insert talk #kinda #🍞 my bread and butter 🍞 #ahfjgkgkg god I DO THINK ITS RLY FUNNY #im not offended by any means i know that hes not for everyone and art style has a lot to do with it #also yeah ive explained self shipping to her :] #we had a long chat about crushes before it was so fun!! shes rly cool i love her 💖🫶💖 #shes the one i went to the mall with #but DAMN SAYING EW OUT LOUD?? THATS MY GIRLBOYFRIEND UR TALKING ABOUT #and its pretty common for lesbians to get crushes on fictional guys who look kinda funny so #not my fault ajfkgk

[s0fter-sin]

y’all i just made garlic bread pizza, do this, do this immediately

#use the slab type not the pull apart one you get from pizza bars #then precook it until its just crispy but not gold #then go nuts #i did hawaiian so napoletana sauce ham pineapple cheese then bbq sauce and it was so damn good #you taste the garlic bread so much its so friggin good #if you do add pineapple maybe use some paper towel to dry it off a bit just so it doesnt get too soggy #but i loved it holy shit #i had another half of garlic bread so i tried a chicken parmi version and it was good but this was vastly superior #coming out of my cage and i’ve been doing just fine.txt

[punkrockgenasiashton]

Picked up The Exquisite Exandria cookbook a couple weeks ago and decided to try my hand at a few: - Coffee Brined Fried Chicken with coffee & bacon gravy with fried potatoes - Beer Braised Breakfast Brawts with apple slaw and fried potatoes - Skaldseat Salmon over Heartmoore Harvest Salad - Marquesean Street Meat and Consolatory Couscous (swapped out pork chops instad of lamb chops becasue LOL HAVE YOU SEEN HOW EXPENSIVE LAMB IS)

#critical role #exquisite exandria #I would've never used coffee in a brine before but holy shit #the chicken and the brawts are fucking fire #the taste I had of the couscous to make sure it was soft was damn good too #My mom said the salmon was good #My dad said the breading for the chicken was too salty #but he loved the brawts

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

Happy New Year ‼️🥳 its half 10 here, I am sat on my sofa eating hot dogs, headphones on cause its too damn loud with big autism eyes, you know the ones, watching everyone in my house play drinking games 🕺🕺🕺🕺🕺🕺

#the headphones arent playing anything but god i love the invention of noise cancellation #i was SUFFERING #disclaimer that im not complaining im having an alright autistic time 👍🏻 #i could leave if i wanted but im good people are leaving me be im good with observing 😌 #earlier i was hiding in the utility room in the dark eating plain bread 👍🏻 #my mum made me hot dogs shout out to my mum 👍🏻 #im also drinking but not very fast i doubt i will get drunk i am not in the mood #but there are so many damn people in my house i dont even know half of them 😭😭 #i am really channeling the autism creature rn 💪🏻💪🏻 #new years #the autism is autisming #autism #OMG LADY GAGAS PLAYING WOOOOOO 🕺🕺🕺🕺🕺🕺🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉 #LADY GAGA FORVEVEVER

[laniidae-passerine]

Honestly I think Dean Highbottom has some shit to answer to as well. The mockery, the derision, the outright admittance that he was hoping Coriolanus would fail and the Snow family would continue to suffer. How someone who loathed the Games still treated a young man with cruelty because of the past, because of social divides that would be so easy to tear down. In the end, it wasn’t just Gaul who shaped Snow into the man he became. So bitter and hateful. So incapable of compassion and forgiveness. Just like his father. Just like his Dean.

#like yeah there were a lot of things questionable about Snow even before he was chosen as a mentor in the games #but like. damn. you didn’t even consider the idea he could be better than his father did you? #the way kindness could have unravelled some of the hate in Snow’s heart #listen to me tell you the horrible things your father did. listen to me tell you that you can be different. you are not the past. #the divides between us do not truly exist. look at the weapon in your hand. it is real. and it can do real damage #but if you never hate someone - if they never fool you into letting violence into your heart - they can never make you use it #it breaks my heart. how could you hate a ghost so much that you’d kill a child. I don’t know. but the Dean does. and so does Snow. #the cycles run and run until somebody stops. and burns some bread. and shares berries. and takes an arrow. and says no more. I love you #it is difficult. it could hurt me. it could be the very last thing I do. it may not even serve me well. but I love you. I love. always. #how pathetic hate makes you. how strong love makes you. like staring at the Dean and staring at characters like Haymitch #like two substance abusing men who know the system inside out. who are complicit. who are victims. both embittered and angry. #but one saw a child and decided to punish him for the past #and the other saw a child and decided - okay. it’s been 23 years. my heart hurts. I want to give in. I want to hate you. I want to not care. #I’m going to care anyway. I’m in so much pain. It’s killing me. I’m going to care anyway. about you both. it won’t be perfect. but I care. #and I’ll be here through hell. and I will fuck up. so fucking badly. because I’m still addicted and angry and god knows I have suffered. #god knows these hands are bloody and they always will be. but I will keep coming back. I will keep trying. I will still love. #and in the end I will write names in a book that belongs to you and I will find a little bit of peace in a house where the sun shines #and the geese make ridiculous noises in the yard. and love will have seen me through. #HAYMITCH YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS I LOVE YOU MY IMPERFECT DARLING #dean highbottom #coriolanus snow #the hunger games #a ballad of songbirds and snakes #haymitch abernathy #thg #abosas #suzanne collins #SHE WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS

[beeduoo]

would u try

#i would take a bite #ctubbo #ctubbo fanart #i will never use the main cc tag thay is so scary i feel like im way too early 2021 pilled my username is gonna get me on a list somwhere😭😭 #it is 2024 #sorreyyy no big pieces lately i am in School and actually that has nothign to do with it i just like to spend 3 hours walking around my Park #IT WAS BEAUTIFUL TODAY LIKE OMG.insanw ir was 80 degrees perfect weather i Trained to school and Back it was so nice and oughgh when i went #to the park after it was LIFERLALY THE PERFECT WEATHEE like all that crazy wind from the day before GONE i was so happy and the clouds were #so beautiful i love the park i lovvee my town i literallu]t live in heaven im so serious]d #tomorrow i will make zucchini bread.....i need to write this essay too but then IM FREE i can lock in i literally finished my part for this #history project in like an hour i am a Pro Procrastinator i got that😅😅 #thays it for tofay i think nothing crazy ok good night #read gourmet hound on webtoon its SOO GOOODDS every time i think of sweets i think of thay damn Webtoon #omg i need to write a rant abour that but not today.....Tomorrow maybe i have so much to say about that ok bue

[novelconcepts]

okay okay okay it's 23k words and fuckin 85 pages long, i'm editing it tomorrow and then it belongs to the world

#'the world' being anyone who cherishes taivan in all their glory as i do #it might not be cake but it ain't bread and hot damn that's progress #would have loved to post it for favorite dynamic today but alas. I want to see my wife before the sun sets #set your alarms y’all

[foxsoulcourt]

“I do understand Thanksgiving. It’s about giving thanks, as far I understand…”

@aprettyspy can we TAWK about his TrOuSeRs please??!! Not ... to ... mention... those hip moves. D A M N.

#love his laughter + little mmm sounds #totally agree about stuffing - ugh #wet bread stuffed in a bird? an abomination #love how he loses it #he’s a great laugh-er #one question tho #about his trousers #are they lycra? painted on? #because d a m n DAMN #she says looking only s e m i-respectfully at his thighs #d a m n #ummm… sighs… thanksgiving it’s the us holiday which holds two stark realities together #modern day = giving thanks + historical = jayzusf*%! colonists were cruel & the story we tell about them is false #would you care for some more cranberry sauce love? #stephen colbert #daniel craig #youtube video

[savage-rhi]

✨️Magenta🔥

#looking at the mental health and therapy positions open in my area #therapists are leaving left and right that a clinic i used to work at that treated me like utter shit is almost offering 140k in salary #to keep folks retained #i remember just a few years ago the max a therapist made there was 75k #seeing other places too where its like 67 to 85 an hr with sign on bonuses upward to 5k #its not a good sign professionals are leaving in droves #but damn it do i wish i had my license already so i could hop on and not live in poverty for a hot minute #im not fooling myself based on how inflation and the economy is running if you make over 100k its gonna be like making less than 45k #cause we getting gutted #but still god damn it #i got 2 and a half more years to go #fuck if i made that much right now i could get out of debt and spend a good chunk on people that need it #cause i don't need much else to keep my ass happy #this is the little flag that gives me hope #I'll be able to make a living doing something i love and helping people and getting my damn fucking bread #if i could make a living full time writing tho that would be fucking amazing #same thing with my voice over stuff too #god theres so much i aspire to do i got the ambition for it alright #but i got the disability that makes me take ten steps back and i live in a capitalistic hellscape that wants me tired and exhausted to where #i can't accomplish anything else but keeping the machine going #i feel like my writing sucks lately thats probably just burnout but god damn #this got bleak #k magenta can go fuck itself lets reword this jay #you're gonna get your license you're gonna have SOME FUCKING STABILITY you're gonna help people you're gonna be content and #you're gonna get your mother fucking bread that you've been promised #magenta mother fuckers magenta

[thenarrativefoil]

not gonna lie i'm on day 11 of this "absolutely no fucking sugar i mean not even the sugar in milk or avocados sugar" diet and buds I am going a little insane

#text #I WANT BROWNIE #i dont DESERVE THIS #I LOVE FOOD #chronic illness #but then i eat an avocado and all my joints light up like fire and 😭😭😭 #i miss bread i miss fruit i miss pastries and baklava and CHEESE and BEANS and #IM FUCKING SICK OF MEAT AND KALE #im going on 6 months of this shit and i dont deserve this #it's been SEVEN MONTHS of trouble shooting on my own waiting for this damn doctor's appointment and im FUCKING TIRED #my gp thinks im crazy and im fucking losing it. i want to eat ice cream i want to eat a fucking burger with a bun and french fries. #MELTDOWN. #xylitol does not taste good and it makes my stomach hurt #IM SICK OF THIS SHIT GRANDPA #THE PANTS I MADE didn't fit after a month went by #i've lost 30lbs and I now weigh as much as I did in MIDDLE SCHOOL. when i was on swim team and had a 2.5 hr PE course every week day. #THIS SHIT SUCKS!!!!!!!!!! #im tired all the damn time. #at least my joints dont hurt anymore. and my skin is calming down. but goddamn.

[ereborne]

Distracted and sleep-deprived is no way to make it through multihour meetings, but have I ever let that stop me before?  

Notable side-effects of this system include: forgetting my camera is on and dropping my face into Jo's fluff; forgetting my mic is on and playing with my hot wheels stormtrooper ATV (thankfully off-camera, and thankfully they did all assume the weird noise was Jo again, and not tiny wheels rumbling back and forth over my num-pad); forgetting that there is an IT rep in this meeting specifically to answer idiot questions and answering them myself; in fact answering any question whose answer I know, no matter how rhetorical or off-topic.  

One of the finance analysts asked, I assume as a joke in response to some other joke I didn't bother to hear, what they should plant to grow a black-and-white chessboard lawn.  (black mondo grass and lambs' ear, but you'd have to be really careful watering)

#yapping tag #the finance head asked why I knew that offhand and I said 'we call it monkey grass back home' #which is. kind of an answer? #in that I know about black mondo grass from googling monkey grass trying to describe it to the man at the roadside nursery #but it doesn't address why I know about lambs' ear at all and oh yeah it doesn't make any damned sense outside my head #(I know about lambs' ear because it's soft. soft soft soft I love it) #I'm so tired okay! don't ask questions if you don't want my weirdass answers! #I'm only so so so very barely a person please have some mercy #it's been a week since I finished reading a book okay you /cannot/ expect me to pay real attention to this 8am-noon meeting #I want some bread and a nap and twenty minutes' break to walk down to my garden and see what the hail did to my poor baby okra plants #and instead I'm going to spend another half-hour helping the IT guy convince everyone we do not need another sharepoint site #please stop expecting me to be both normal and functional rn I haven't the bandwidth for it