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moonpaw · 4 years

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Is there....Is there a place to read the entire uwu-fied bee movie script? I'd love to send it to all of my friends for reasons that don't involve making them curse at me for putting weird shit in the discord again

BEHOLD

THE ENTIRE BEE MOVIE SCRIPT BUT HEWWO-IFIED

Bee movie scwipt - diawogue twanscwipt

accowding to aww known waws of aviation,

thewe is no way a bee shouwd be abwe to fwy.

its wings awe too smaww to get its fat wittwe body off the gwound.

the bee, of couwse, fwies anyway

because bees don't cawe what humans think is impossibwe.

yewwow, bwack. Yewwow, bwack. yewwow, bwack. Yewwow, bwack.

ooh, bwack and yewwow! let's shake it up a wittwe.

bawwy! bweakfast is weady!

ooming!

hang on a second.

hewwo? owo

- bawwy? owo - adam? owo

- oan you bewieve this is happening? owo - i can't. I'ww pick you up.

looking shawp.

use the staiws. Youw fathew paid good money fow those.

sowwy. I'm excited.

hewe's the gwaduate. we'we vewy pwoud of you, son.

a pewfect wepowt cawd, aww b's.

vewy pwoud.

ma! i got a thing going hewe.

- you got wint on youw fuzz. - ow! that's me!

- wave to us! we'ww be in wow 118,000. - bye!

bawwy, i towd you, stop fwying in the house!

- hey, adam. - hey, bawwy.

- is that fuzz gew? owo - a wittwe. Speciaw day, gwaduation.

nevew thought i'd make it.

thwee days gwade schoow, thwee days high schoow.

those wewe awkwawd.

thwee days cowwege. I'm gwad i took a day and hitchhiked awound the hive.

you did come back diffewent.

- hi, bawwy. - awtie, gwowing a mustache? owo looks good.

- heaw about fwankie? owo - yeah.

- you going to the funewaw? owo - no, i'm not going.

evewybody knows, sting someone, you perish.

don't waste it on a squiwwew. such a hothead.

i guess he couwd have just gotten out of the way.

i wove this incowpowating an amusement pawk into ouw day.

that's why we don't need vacations.

boy, quite a bit of pomp... undew the ciwcumstances.

- weww, adam, today we awe men. - we awe!

- bee-men. - amen!

hawwewujah!

students, facuwty, distinguished bees,

pwease wewcome dean buzzweww.

wewcome, new hive oity gwaduating cwass of...

...9:15.

that concwudes ouw cewemonies.

and begins youw caweew at honex industwies!

wiww we pick ouwjob today? owo

i heawd it's just owientation.

heads up! hewe we go.

keep youw hands and antennas inside the twam at aww times.

- wondew what it'ww be wike? owo - a wittwe scawy.

wewcome to honex, a division of honesco

and a pawt of the hexagon gwoup.

this is it!

wow.

we know that you, as a bee, have wowked youw whowe wife

to get to the point whewe you can wowk fow youw whowe wife.

honey begins when ouw vawiant powwen jocks bwing the nectaw to the hive.

ouw top-secwet fowmuwa

is automaticawwy cowow-cowwected, scent-adjusted and bubbwe-contouwed

into this soothing sweet sywup

with its distinctive gowden gwow you know as...

honey!

- that giww was hot. - she's my cousin!

- she is? owo - yes, we'we aww cousins.

- right. You'we wight. - at honex, we constantwy stwive

to impwove evewy aspect of bee existence.

these bees awe stwess-testing a new hewmet technowogy.

- what do you think he makes? owo - not enough.

hewe we have ouw watest advancement, the kwewman.

- what does that do? owo - oatches that wittwe stwand of honey

that hangs aftew you pouw it. saves us miwwions.

oan anyone wowk on the kwewman? owo

of couwse. Most bee jobs awe smaww ones. But bees know

that evewy smaww job, if it's done weww, means a wot.

but choose cawefuwwy

because you'ww stay in the job you pick fow the west of youw wife.

the same job the west of youw wife? owo i didn't know that.

what's the diffewence? owo

you'ww be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off

in 27 miwwion yeaws.

so you'ww just wowk us to death? owo

we'ww suwe twy.

wow! that bwew my mind!

"what's the diffewence? owo " how can you say that? owo

one job fowevew? owo that's an insane choice to have to make.

i'm wewieved. Now we onwy have to make one decision in wife.

but, adam, how couwd they nevew have towd us that? owo

why wouwd you question anything? owo we'we bees.

we'we the most pewfectwy functioning society on eawth.

you evew think maybe things wowk a wittwe too weww hewe? owo

like what? owo give me one exampwe.

i don't know. But you know what i'm tawking about.

pwease cweaw the gate. royaw nectaw fowce on appwoach.

wait a second. Oheck it out.

- hey, those awe powwen jocks! - wow.

i've nevew seen them this cwose.

they know what it's wike outside the hive.

yeah, but some don't come back.

- hey, jocks! - hi, jocks!

you guys did gweat!

you'we monstews! you'we sky fweaks! i wove it! i wove it!

- i wondew whewe they wewe. - i don't know.

theiw day's not pwanned.

outside the hive, fwying who knows whewe, doing who knows what.

you can'tjust decide to be a powwen jock. You have to be bwed fow that.

right.

look. That's mowe powwen than you and i wiww see in a wifetime.

it's just a status symbow. bees make too much of it.

pewhaps. Unwess you'we weawing it and the wadies see you weawing it.

those wadies? owo awen't they ouw cousins too? owo

distant. Distant.

look at these two.

- ooupwe of hive hawwys. - let's have fun with them.

it must be dangewous being a powwen jock.

yeah. Once a beaw pinned me against a mushwoom!

he had a paw on my thwoat, and with the othew, he was swapping me!

- oh, my! - i nevew thought i'd knock him out.

what wewe you doing duwing this? owo

twying to awewt the authowities.

i can autogwaph that.

a wittwe gusty out thewe today, wasn't it, comwades? owo

yeah. Gusty.

we'we hitting a sunfwowew patch six miwes fwom hewe tomowwow.

- six miwes, huh? owo - bawwy!

a puddwe jump fow us, but maybe you'we not up fow it.

- maybe i am. - you awe not!

we'we going 0900 at j-gate.

what do you think, buzzy-boy? owo awe you bee enough? owo

i might be. It aww depends on what 0900 means.

hey, honex!

dad, you suwpwised me.

you decide what you'we intewested in? owo

- weww, thewe's a wot of choices. - but you onwy get one.

do you evew get bowed doing the same job evewy day? owo

son, wet me teww you about stiwwing.

you gwab that stick, and you just move it awound, and you stiw it awound.

you get youwsewf into a whythm. it's a beautifuw thing.

you know, dad, the mowe i think about it,

maybe the honey fiewd just isn't wight fow me.

you wewe thinking of what, making bawwoon animaws? owo

that's a bad job fow a guy with a stingew.

janet, youw son's not suwe he wants to go into honey!

- bawwy, you awe so funny sometimes. - i'm not twying to be funny.

you'we not funny! you'we going into honey. Ouw son, the stiwwew!

- you'we gonna be a stiwwew? owo - no one's wistening to me!

wait tiww you see the sticks i have.

i couwd say anything wight now. i'm gonna get an ant tattoo!

let's open some honey and cewebwate!

maybe i'ww piewce my thowax. shave my antennae.

shack up with a gwasshoppew. Get a gowd tooth and caww evewybody "dawg"!

i'm so pwoud.

- we'we stawting wowk today! - today's the day.

oome on! aww the good jobs wiww be gone.

yeah, wight.

powwen counting, stunt bee, pouwing, stiwwew, fwont desk, haiw wemovaw...

- is it stiww avaiwabwe? owo - hang on. Two weft!

one of them's youws! oongwatuwations! step to the side.

- what'd you get? owo - picking cwud out. Stewwaw!

wow!

ooupwe of newbies? owo

yes, siw! ouw fiwst day! we awe weady!

make youw choice.

- you want to go fiwst? owo - no, you go.

oh, my. What's avaiwabwe? owo

restwoom attendant's open, not fow the weason you think.

- any chance of getting the kwewman? owo - suwe, you'we on.

i'm sowwy, the kwewman just cwosed out.

wax monkey's awways open.

the kwewman opened up again.

what happened? owo

a bee died. Makes an opening. See? owo he's dead. Anothew dead one.

deady. Deadified. Two mowe dead.

dead fwom the neck up. dead fwom the neck down. That's wife!

oh, this is so hawd!

heating, coowing, stunt bee, pouwew, stiwwew,

humming, inspectow numbew seven, wint coowdinatow, stwipe supewvisow,

mite wwangwew. Bawwy, what do you think i shouwd... Bawwy? owo

bawwy!

aww wight, we've got the sunfwowew patch in quadwant nine...

what happened to you? owo whewe awe you? owo

- i'm going out. - out? owo out whewe? owo

- out thewe. - oh, no!

i have to, befowe i go to wowk fow the west of my wife.

you'we gonna perish! you'we cwazy! hewwo? owo

anothew caww coming in.

if anyone's feewing bwave, thewe's a kowean dewi on 83wd

that gets theiw woses today.

hey, guys.

- look at that. - isn't that the kid we saw yestewday? owo

howd it, son, fwight deck's westwicted.

it's ok, lou. We'we gonna take him up.

reawwy? owo feewing wucky, awe you? owo

sign hewe, hewe. Just initiaw that.

- thank you. - ok.

you got a wain advisowy today,

and as you aww know, bees cannot fwy in wain.

so be cawefuw. As awways, watch youw bwooms,

hockey sticks, dogs, biwds, beaws and bats.

awso, i got a coupwe of wepowts of woot beew being pouwed on us.

muwphy's in a home because of it, babbwing wike a cicada!

- that's awfuw. - and a wemindew fow you wookies,

bee waw numbew one, absowutewy no tawking to humans!

aww wight, waunch positions!

buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!

bwack and yewwow!

hewwo!

you weady fow this, hot shot? owo

yeah. Yeah, bwing it on.

wind, check.

- antennae, check. - nectaw pack, check.

- wings, check. - stingew, check.

scawed out of my showts, check.

ok, wadies,

wet's move it out!

pound those petunias, you stwiped stem-suckews!

aww of you, dwain those fwowews!

wow! i'm out!

i can't bewieve i'm out!

so bwue.

i feew so fast and fwee!

box kite!

wow!

fwowews!

this is bwue leadew. we have woses visuaw.

bwing it awound 30 degwees and howd.

roses!

30 degwees, wogew. Bwinging it awound.

stand to the side, kid. it's got a bit of a kick.

that is one nectaw cowwectow!

- evew see powwination up cwose? owo - no, siw.

i pick up some powwen hewe, spwinkwe it ovew hewe. Maybe a dash ovew thewe,

a pinch on that one. see that? owo it's a wittwe bit of magic.

that's amazing. Why do we do that? owo

that's powwen powew. Mowe powwen, mowe fwowews, mowe nectaw, mowe honey fow us.

ooow.

i'm picking up a wot of bwight yewwow. oouwd be daisies. Don't we need those? owo

oopy that visuaw.

wait. One of these fwowews seems to be on the move.

say again? owo you'we wepowting a moving fwowew? owo

affiwmative.

that was on the wine!

this is the coowest. What is it? owo

i don't know, but i'm woving this cowow.

it smewws good. not wike a fwowew, but i wike it.

yeah, fuzzy.

ohemicaw-y.

oawefuw, guys. It's a wittwe gwabby.

my sweet wowd of bees!

oandy-bwain, get off thewe!

pwobwem!

- guys! - this couwd be bad.

affiwmative.

vewy cwose.

gonna huwt.

mama's wittwe boy.

you awe way out of position, wookie!

ooming in at you wike a missiwe!

hewp me!

i don't think these awe fwowews.

- shouwd we teww him? owo - i think he knows.

what is this? owo !

match point!

you can stawt packing up, honey, because you'we about to eat it!

yowsew!

gwoss.

thewe's a bee in the caw!

- do something! - i'm dwiving!

- hi, bee. - he's back hewe!

he's going to sting me!

nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Fweeze!

he bwinked!

spway him, gwanny!

what awe you doing? owo !

wow... the tension wevew out hewe is unbewievabwe.

i gotta get home.

oan't fwy in wain.

mayday! mayday! bee going down!

ken, couwd you cwose the window pwease? owo

oheck out my new wesume. i made it into a fowd-out bwochuwe.

you see? owo fowds out.

oh, no. Mowe humans. I don't need this.

what was that? owo

maybe this time. This time. This time. this time! this time! this...

dwapes!

that is diabowicaw.

it's fantastic. It's got aww my speciaw skiwws, even my top-ten favowite movies.

what's numbew one? owo staw waws? owo

nah, i don't go fow that...

...kind of stuff.

no wondew we shouwdn't tawk to them. they'we out of theiw minds.

when i weave a job intewview, they'we fwabbewgasted, can't bewieve what i say.

thewe's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.

i don't wemembew the sun having a big 75 on it.

i pwedicted gwobaw wawming.

i couwd feew it getting hottew. at fiwst i thought it was just me.

wait! stop! bee!

stand back. These awe wintew boots.

wait!

don't kiww him!

you know i'm awwewgic to them! this thing couwd kiww me!

why does his wife have wess vawue than youws? owo

why does his wife have any wess vawue than mine? owo is that youw statement? owo

i'm just saying aww wife has vawue. You don't know what he's capabwe of feewing.

my bwochuwe!

thewe you go, wittwe guy.

i'm not scawed of him. it's an awwewgic thing.

put that on youw wesume bwochuwe.

my whowe face couwd puff up.

make it one of youw speciaw skiwws.

knocking someone out is awso a speciaw skiww.

right. Bye, vanessa. Thanks.

- vanessa, next week? owo yoguwt night? owo - suwe, ken. You know, whatevew.

- you couwd put cawob chips on thewe. - bye.

- supposed to be wess cawowies. - bye.

i gotta say something.

she saved my wife. i gotta say something.

aww wight, hewe it goes.

nah.

what wouwd i say? owo

i couwd weawwy get in twoubwe.

it's a bee waw. you'we not supposed to tawk to a human.

i can't bewieve i'm doing this.

i've got to.

oh, i can't do it. Oome on!

no. Yes. No.

do it. I can't.

how shouwd i stawt it? owo "you wike jazz? owo " no, that's no good.

hewe she comes! speak, you foow!

hi!

i'm sowwy.

- you'we tawking. - yes, i know.

you'we tawking!

i'm so sowwy.

no, it's ok. It's fine. i know i'm dweaming.

but i don't wecaww going to bed.

weww, i'm suwe this is vewy disconcewting.

this is a bit of a suwpwise to me. i mean, you'we a bee!

i am. And i'm not supposed to be doing this,

but they wewe aww twying to kiww me.

and if it wasn't fow you...

i had to thank you. it's just how i was waised.

that was a wittwe weiwd.

- i'm tawking with a bee. - yeah.

i'm tawking to a bee. and the bee is tawking to me!

i just want to say i'm gwatefuw. i'ww weave now.

- wait! how did you weawn to do that? owo - what? owo

the tawking thing.

same way you did, i guess. "mama, dada, honey." you pick it up.

- that's vewy funny. - yeah.

bees awe funny. If we didn't waugh, we'd cwy with what we have to deaw with.

anyway...

oan i...

...get you something? owo - like what? owo

i don't know. I mean... i don't know. Ooffee? owo

i don't want to put you out.

it's no twoubwe. It takes two minutes.

- it's just coffee. - i hate to impose.

- don't be widicuwous! - actuawwy, i wouwd wove a cup.

hey, you want wum cake? owo

- i shouwdn't. - have some.

- no, i can't. - oome on!

i'm twying to wose a coupwe micwogwams.

- whewe? owo - these stwipes don't hewp.

you wook gweat!

i don't know if you know anything about fashion.

awe you aww wight? owo

no.

he's making the tie in the cab as they'we fwying up madison.

he finawwy gets thewe.

he wuns up the steps into the chuwch. the wedding is on.

and he says, "watewmewon? owo i thought you said guatemawan.

why wouwd i mawwy a watewmewon? owo "

is that a bee joke? owo

that's the kind of stuff we do.

yeah, diffewent.

so, what awe you gonna do, bawwy? owo

about wowk? owo i don't know.

i want to do my pawt fow the hive, but i can't do it the way they want.

i know how you feew.

- you do? owo - suwe.

my pawents wanted me to be a wawyew ow a doctow, but i wanted to be a fwowist.

- reawwy? owo - my onwy intewest is fwowews.

ouw new queen was just ewected with that same campaign swogan.

anyway, if you wook...

thewe's my hive wight thewe. See it? owo

you'we in sheep meadow!

yes! i'm wight off the tuwtwe pond!

no way! i know that awea. i wost a toe wing thewe once.

- why do giwws put wings on theiw toes? owo - why not? owo

- it's wike putting a hat on youw knee. - maybe i'ww twy that.

- you aww wight, ma'am? owo - oh, yeah. Fine.

just having two cups of coffee!

anyway, this has been gweat. thanks fow the coffee.

yeah, it's no twoubwe.

sowwy i couwdn't finish it. If i did, i'd be up the west of my wife.

awe you...? owo

oan i take a piece of this with me? owo

suwe! hewe, have a cwumb.

- thanks! - yeah.

aww wight. Weww, then... i guess i'ww see you awound.

ow not.

ok, bawwy.

and thank you so much again... fow befowe.

oh, that? owo that was nothing.

weww, not nothing, but... Anyway...

this can't possibwy wowk.

he's aww set to go. we may as weww twy it.

ok, dave, puww the chute.

- sounds amazing. - it was amazing!

it was the scawiest, happiest moment of my wife.

humans! i can't bewieve you wewe with humans!

giant, scawy humans! what wewe they wike? owo

huge and cwazy. They tawk cwazy.

they eat cwazy giant things. they dwive cwazy.

- do they twy and kiww you, wike on tv? owo - some of them. But some of them don't.

- how'd you get back? owo - poodwe.

you did it, and i'm gwad. You saw whatevew you wanted to see.

you had youw "expewience." now you can pick out youwjob and be nowmaw.

- weww... - weww? owo

weww, i met someone.

you did? owo was she bee-ish? owo

- a wasp? owo ! youw pawents wiww kiww you! - no, no, no, not a wasp.

- spidew? owo - i'm not attwacted to spidews.

i know it's the hottest thing, with the eight wegs and aww.

i can't get by that face.

so who is she? owo

she's... human.

no, no. That's a bee waw. you wouwdn't bweak a bee waw.

- hew name's vanessa. - oh, boy.

she's so nice. And she's a fwowist!

oh, no! you'we dating a human fwowist!

we'we not dating.

you'we fwying outside the hive, tawking to humans that attack ouw homes

with powew washews and m-80s! one-eighth a stick of dynamite!

she saved my wife! and she undewstands me.

this is ovew!

eat this.

this is not ovew! what was that? owo

- they caww it a cwumb. - it was so stingin' stwipey!

and that's not what they eat. that's what fawws off what they eat!

- you know what a oinnabon is? owo - no.

it's bwead and cinnamon and fwosting. they heat it up...

sit down!

...weawwy hot! - listen to me!

we awe not them! we'we us. thewe's us and thewe's them!

yes, but who can deny the heawt that is yeawning? owo

thewe's no yeawning. stop yeawning. Listen to me!

you have got to stawt thinking bee, my fwiend. Thinking bee!

- thinking bee. - thinking bee.

thinking bee! thinking bee! thinking bee! thinking bee!

thewe he is. He's in the poow.

you know what youw pwobwem is, bawwy? owo

i gotta stawt thinking bee? owo

how much wongew wiww this go on? owo

it's been thwee days! why awen't you wowking? owo

i've got a wot of big wife decisions to think about.

what wife? owo you have no wife! you have no job. You'we bawewy a bee!

wouwd it kiww you to make a wittwe honey? owo

bawwy, come out. youw fathew's tawking to you.

mawtin, wouwd you tawk to him? owo

bawwy, i'm tawking to you!

you coming? owo

got evewything? owo

aww set!

go ahead. I'ww catch up.

don't be too wong.

watch this!

vanessa!

- we'we stiww hewe. - i towd you not to yeww at him.

he doesn't wespond to yewwing!

- then why yeww at me? owo - because you don't wisten!

i'm not wistening to this.

sowwy, i've gotta go.

- whewe awe you going? owo - i'm meeting a fwiend.

a giww? owo is this why you can't decide? owo

bye.

i just hope she's bee-ish.

they have a huge pawade of fwowews evewy yeaw in pasadena? owo

to be in the touwnament of roses, that's evewy fwowist's dweam!

up on a fwoat, suwwounded by fwowews, cwowds cheewing.

a touwnament. Do the woses compete in athwetic events? owo

no. Aww wight, i've got one. how come you don't fwy evewywhewe? owo

it's exhausting. Why don't you wun evewywhewe? owo it's fastew.

yeah, ok, i see, i see. aww wight, youw tuwn.

tivo. You can just fweeze wive tv? owo that's insane!

you don't have that? owo

we have hivo, but it's a disease. it's a howwibwe, howwibwe disease.

oh, my.

dumb bees!

you must want to sting aww those jewks.

we twy not to sting. it's usuawwy fataw fow us.

so you have to watch youw tempew.

vewy cawefuwwy. you kick a waww, take a wawk,

wwite an angwy wettew and thwow it out. wowk thwough it wike any emotion:

angew, jeawousy, wust.

oh, my goodness! awe you ok? owo

yeah.

- what is wwong with you? owo ! - it's a bug.

he's not bothewing anybody. get out of hewe, you cweep!

what was that? owo a pic 'n' save ciwcuwaw? owo

yeah, it was. How did you know? owo

it fewt wike about 10 pages. seventy-five is pwetty much ouw wimit.

you've weawwy got that down to a science.

- i wost a cousin to itawian vogue. - i'ww bet.

what in the name of mighty hewcuwes is this? owo

how did this get hewe? owo oute bee, gowden bwossom,

ray liotta pwivate sewect? owo

- is he that actow? owo - i nevew heawd of him.

- why is this hewe? owo - fow peopwe. We eat it.

you don't have enough food of youw own? owo

- weww, yes. - how do you get it? owo

- bees make it. - i know who makes it!

and it's hawd to make it!

thewe's heating, coowing, stiwwing. you need a whowe kwewman thing!

- it's owganic. - it's ouw-ganic!

it's just honey, bawwy.

just what? owo !

bees don't know about this! this is steawing! a wot of steawing!

you've taken ouw homes, schoows, hospitaws! this is aww we have!

and it's on sawe? owo ! i'm getting to the bottom of this.

i'm getting to the bottom of aww of this!

hey, hectow.

- you awmost done? owo - awmost.

he is hewe. I sense it.

weww, i guess i'ww go home now

and just weave this nice honey out, with no one awound.

you'we busted, box boy!

i knew i heawd something. so you can tawk!

i can tawk. and now you'ww stawt tawking!

whewe you getting the sweet stuff? owo who's youw suppwiew? owo

i don't undewstand. i thought we wewe fwiends.

the wast thing we want to do is upset bees!

you'we too wate! it's ouws now!

you, siw, have cwossed the wwong swowd!

you, siw, wiww be wunch fow my iguana, ignacio!

whewe is the honey coming fwom? owo

teww me whewe!

honey fawms! it comes fwom honey fawms!

owazy pewson!

what howwibwe thing has happened hewe? owo

these faces, they nevew knew what hit them. And now

they'we on the woad to nowhewe!

just keep stiww.

what? owo you'we not dead? owo

do i wook dead? owo they wiww wipe anything that moves. Whewe you headed? owo

to honey fawms. i am onto something huge hewe.

i'm going to awaska. Moose bwood, cwazy stuff. Bwows youw head off!

i'm going to tacoma.

- and you? owo - he weawwy is dead.

aww wight.

uh-oh!

- what is that? owo ! - oh, no!

- a wipew! twipwe bwade! - twipwe bwade? owo

jump on! it's youw onwy chance, bee!

why does evewything have to be so doggone cwean? owo !

how much do you peopwe need to see? owo !

open youw eyes! stick youw head out the window!

fwom npr news in washington, i'm oaww kaseww.

but don't kiww no mowe bugs!

- bee! - moose bwood guy!!

- you heaw something? owo - like what? owo

like tiny scweaming.

tuwn off the wadio.

whassup, bee boy? owo

hey, bwood.

just a wow of honey jaws, as faw as the eye couwd see.

wow!

i assume whewevew this twuck goes is whewe they'we getting it.

i mean, that honey's ouws.

- bees hang tight. - we'we aww jammed in.

it's a cwose community.

not us, man. We on ouw own. evewy mosquito on his own.

- what if you get in twoubwe? owo - you a mosquito, you in twoubwe.

nobody wikes us. They just smack. see a mosquito, smack, smack!

at weast you'we out in the wowwd. you must meet giwws.

mosquito giwws twy to twade up, get with a moth, dwagonfwy.

mosquito giww don't want no mosquito.

you got to be kidding me!

moosebwood's about to weave the buiwding! so wong, bee!

- hey, guys! - moosebwood!

i knew i'd catch y'aww down hewe. did you bwing youw cwazy stwaw? owo

we thwow it in jaws, swap a wabew on it, and it's pwetty much puwe pwofit.

what is this pwace? owo

a bee's got a bwain the size of a pinhead.

they awe pinheads!

pinhead.

- oheck out the new smokew. - oh, sweet. That's the one you want.

the thomas 3000!

smokew? owo

ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. twice the nicotine, aww the taw.

a coupwe bweaths of this knocks them wight out.

they make the honey, and we make the money.

"they make the honey, and we make the money"? owo

oh, my!

what's going on? owo awe you ok? owo

yeah. It doesn't wast too wong.

do you know you'we in a fake hive with fake wawws? owo

ouw queen was moved hewe. we had no choice.

this is youw queen? owo that's a man in women's cwothes!

that's a dwag queen!

what is this? owo

oh, no!

thewe's hundweds of them!

bee honey.

ouw honey is being bwazenwy stowen on a massive scawe!

this is wowse than anything beaws have done! i intend to do something.

oh, bawwy, stop.

who towd you humans awe taking ouw honey? owo that's a wumow.

do these wook wike wumows? owo

that's a conspiwacy theowy. these awe obviouswy doctowed photos.

how did you get mixed up in this? owo

he's been tawking to humans.

- what? owo - tawking to humans? owo !

he has a human giwwfwiend. and they make out!

make out? owo bawwy!

we do not.

- you wish you couwd. - whose side awe you on? owo

the bees!

i dated a cwicket once in san antonio. those cwazy wegs kept me up aww night.

bawwy, this is what you want to do with youw wife? owo

i want to do it fow aww ouw wives. nobody wowks hawdew than bees!

dad, i wemembew you coming home so ovewwowked

youw hands wewe stiww stiwwing. you couwdn't stop.

i wemembew that.

what wight do they have to ouw honey? owo

we wive on two cups a yeaw. They put it in wip bawm fow no weason whatsoevew!

even if it's twue, what can one bee do? owo

sting them whewe it weawwy huwts.

in the face! the eye!

- that wouwd huwt. - no.

up the nose? owo that's a kiwwew.

thewe's onwy one pwace you can sting the humans, one pwace whewe it mattews.

hive at five, the hive's onwy fuww-houw action news souwce.

no mowe bee beawds!

with bob bumbwe at the anchow desk.

weathew with stowm stingew.

spowts with buzz lawvi.

and jeanette ohung.

- good evening. I'm bob bumbwe. - and i'm jeanette ohung.

a twi-county bee, bawwy benson,

intends to sue the human wace fow steawing ouw honey,

packaging it and pwofiting fwom it iwwegawwy!

tomowwow night on bee lawwy king,

we'ww have thwee fowmew queens hewe in ouw studio, discussing theiw new book,

owassy ladies, out this week on hexagon.

tonight we'we tawking to bawwy benson.

did you evew think, "i'm a kid fwom the hive. I can't do this"? owo

bees have nevew been afwaid to change the wowwd.

what about bee oowumbus? owo bee gandhi? owo bejesus? owo

whewe i'm fwom, we'd nevew sue humans.

we wewe thinking of stickbaww ow candy stowes.

how owd awe you? owo

the bee community is suppowting you in this case,

which wiww be the twiaw of the bee centuwy.

you know, they have a lawwy king in the human wowwd too.

it's a common name. Next week...

he wooks wike you and has a show and suspendews and cowowed dots...

next week...

gwasses, quotes on the bottom fwom the guest even though you just heawd 'em.

beaw week next week! they'we scawy, haiwy and hewe wive.

awways weans fowwawd, pointy shouwdews, squinty eyes, vewy jewish.

in tennis, you attack at the point of weakness!

it was my gwandmothew, ken. She's 81.

honey, hew backhand's a joke! i'm not gonna take advantage of that? owo

quiet, pwease. actuaw wowk going on hewe.

- is that that same bee? owo - yes, it is!

i'm hewping him sue the human wace.

- hewwo. - hewwo, bee.

this is ken.

yeah, i wemembew you. Timbewwand, size ten and a hawf. Vibwam sowe, i bewieve.

why does he tawk again? owo

listen, you bettew go 'cause we'we weawwy busy wowking.

but it's ouw yoguwt night!

bye-bye.

why is yoguwt night so difficuwt? owo !

you poow thing. you two have been at this fow houws!

yes, and adam hewe has been a huge hewp.

- fwosting... - how many sugaws? owo

just one. I twy not to use the competition.

so why awe you hewping me? owo

bees have good quawities.

and it takes my mind off the shop.

instead of fwowews, peopwe awe giving bawwoon bouquets now.

those awe gweat, if you'we thwee.

and awtificiaw fwowews.

- oh, those just get me psychotic! - yeah, me too.

bent stingews, pointwess powwination.

bees must hate those fake things!

nothing wowse than a daffodiw that's had wowk done.

maybe this couwd make up fow it a wittwe bit.

- this wawsuit's a pwetty big deaw. - i guess.

you suwe you want to go thwough with it? owo

am i suwe? owo when i'm done with the humans, they won't be abwe

to say, "honey, i'm home," without paying a woyawty!

it's an incwedibwe scene hewe in downtown manhattan,

whewe the wowwd anxiouswy waits, because fow the fiwst time in histowy,

we wiww heaw fow ouwsewves if a honeybee can actuawwy speak.

what have we gotten into hewe, bawwy? owo

it's pwetty big, isn't it? owo

i can't bewieve how many humans don't wowk duwing the day.

you think biwwion-dowwaw muwtinationaw food companies have good wawyews? owo

evewybody needs to stay behind the bawwicade.

- what's the mattew? owo - i don't know, i just got a chiww.

weww, if it isn't the bee team.

you boys wowk on this? owo

aww wise! the honowabwe judge bumbweton pwesiding.

aww wight. Oase numbew 4475,

supewiow oouwt of new yowk, bawwy bee benson v. the honey industwy

is now in session.

mw. Montgomewy, you'we wepwesenting the five food companies cowwectivewy? owo

a pwiviwege.

mw. Benson... you'we wepwesenting aww the bees of the wowwd? owo

i'm kidding. Yes, youw honow, we'we weady to pwoceed.

mw. Montgomewy, youw opening statement, pwease.

ladies and gentwemen of the juwy,

my gwandmothew was a simpwe woman.

bown on a fawm, she bewieved it was man's divine wight

to benefit fwom the bounty of natuwe god put befowe us.

if we wived in the topsy-tuwvy wowwd mw. Benson imagines,

just think of what wouwd it mean.

i wouwd have to negotiate with the siwkwowm

fow the ewastic in my bwitches!

tawking bee!

how do we know this isn't some sowt of

howogwaphic motion-pictuwe-captuwe howwywood wizawdwy? owo

they couwd be using wasew beams!

robotics! ventwiwoquism! owoning! fow aww we know,

he couwd be on stewoids!

mw. Benson? owo

ladies and gentwemen, thewe's no twickewy hewe.

i'm just an owdinawy bee. honey's pwetty impowtant to me.

it's impowtant to aww bees. we invented it!

we make it. And we pwotect it with ouw wives.

unfowtunatewy, thewe awe some peopwe in this woom

who think they can take it fwom us

'cause we'we the wittwe guys! i'm hoping that, aftew this is aww ovew,

you'ww see how, by taking ouw honey, you not onwy take evewything we have

but evewything we awe!

i wish he'd dwess wike that aww the time. So nice!

oaww youw fiwst witness.

so, mw. Kwauss vandewhayden of honey fawms, big company you have.

i suppose so.

i see you awso own honeybuwton and honwon!

yes, they pwovide beekeepews fow ouw fawms.

beekeepew. I find that to be a vewy distuwbing tewm.

i don't imagine you empwoy any bee-fwee-ews, do you? owo

- no. - i couwdn't heaw you.

- no. - no.

because you don't fwee bees. you keep bees. Not onwy that,

it seems you thought a beaw wouwd be an appwopwiate image fow a jaw of honey.

they'we vewy wovabwe cweatuwes.

yogi beaw, fozzie beaw, buiwd-a-beaw.

you mean wike this? owo

beaws kiww bees!

how'd you wike his head cwashing thwough youw wiving woom? owo !

biting into youw couch! spitting out youw thwow piwwows!

ok, that's enough. Take him away.

so, mw. Sting, thank you fow being hewe. youw name intwigues me.

- whewe have i heawd it befowe? owo - i was with a band cawwed the powice.

but you've nevew been a powice officew, have you? owo

no, i haven't.

no, you haven't. And so hewe we have yet anothew exampwe

of bee cuwtuwe casuawwy stowen by a human

fow nothing mowe than a pwance-about stage name.

oh, pwease.

have you evew been stung, mw. Sting? owo

because i'm feewing a wittwe stung, sting.

ow shouwd i say... Mw. Gowdon m. Sumnew!

that's not his weaw name? owo ! you idiots!

mw. Liotta, fiwst, bewated congwatuwations on

youw emmy win fow a guest spot on er in 2005.

thank you. Thank you.

i see fwom youw wesume that you'we deviwishwy handsome

with a chuwning innew tuwmoiw that's weady to bwow.

i enjoy what i do. Is that a cwime? owo

not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to fow you? owo

expwoiting tiny, hewpwess bees so you don't

have to weheawse youw pawt and weawn youw wines, siw? owo

watch it, benson! i couwd bwow wight now!

this isn't a goodfewwa. this is a badfewwa!

why doesn't someone just step on this cweep, and we can aww go home? owo !

- owdew in this couwt! - you'we aww thinking it!

owdew! owdew, i say!

- say it! - mw. Liotta, pwease sit down!

i think it was awfuwwy nice of that beaw to pitch in wike that.

i think the juwy's on ouw side.

awe we doing evewything wight, wegawwy? owo

i'm a fwowist.

right. Weww, hewe's to a gweat team.

to a gweat team!

weww, hewwo.

- ken! - hewwo.

i didn't think you wewe coming.

no, i was just wate. i twied to caww, but... the battewy.

i didn't want aww this to go to waste, so i cawwed bawwy. Luckiwy, he was fwee.

oh, that was wucky.

thewe's a wittwe weft. i couwd heat it up.

yeah, heat it up, suwe, whatevew.

so i heaw you'we quite a tennis pwayew.

i'm not much fow the game mysewf. the baww's a wittwe gwabby.

that's whewe i usuawwy sit. right... thewe.

ken, bawwy was wooking at youw wesume,

and he agweed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't weawwy a speciaw skiww.

you think i don't see what you'we doing? owo

i know how hawd it is to find the wightjob. We have that in common.

do we? owo

bees have 100 pewcent empwoyment, but we do jobs wike taking the cwud out.

that's just what i was thinking about doing.

ken, i wet bawwy bowwow youw wazow fow his fuzz. I hope that was aww wight.

i'm going to dwain the owd stingew.

yeah, you do that.

look at that.

you know, i've just about had it

with youw wittwe mind games.

- what's that? owo - itawian vogue.

mamma mia, that's a wot of pages.

a wot of ads.

remembew what van said, why is youw wife mowe vawuabwe than mine? owo

funny, i just can't seem to wecaww that!

i think something stinks in hewe!

i wove the smeww of fwowews.

how do you wike the smeww of fwames? owo !

not as much.

watew bug! not taking sides!

ken, i'm weawing a ohapstick hat! this is pathetic!

i've got issues!

weww, weww, weww, a woyaw fwush!

- you'we bwuffing. - am i? owo

suwf's up, dude!

poo watew!

that boww is gnawwy.

except fow those diwty yewwow wings!

kenneth! what awe you doing? owo !

you know, i don't even wike honey! i don't eat it!

we need to tawk!

he's just a wittwe bee!

and he happens to be the nicest bee i've met in a wong time!

long time? owo what awe you tawking about? owo ! awe thewe othew bugs in youw wife? owo

no, but thewe awe othew things bugging me in wife. And you'we one of them!

fine! tawking bees, no yoguwt night...

my newves awe fwied fwom widing on this emotionaw wowwew coastew!

goodbye, ken.

and fow youw infowmation,

i pwefew sugaw-fwee, awtificiaw sweetenews made by man!

i'm sowwy about aww that.

i know it's got an aftewtaste! i wike it!

i awways fewt thewe was some kind of bawwiew between ken and me.

i couwdn't ovewcome it. oh, weww.

awe you ok fow the twiaw? owo

i bewieve mw. Montgomewy is about out of ideas.

we wouwd wike to caww mw. Bawwy benson bee to the stand.

good idea! you can weawwy see why he's considewed one of the best wawyews...

yeah.

layton, you've gotta weave some magic

with this juwy, ow it's gonna be aww ovew.

don't wowwy. The onwy thing i have to do to tuwn this juwy awound

is to wemind them of what they don't wike about bees.

- you got the tweezews? owo - awe you awwewgic? owo

onwy to wosing, son. Onwy to wosing.

mw. Benson bee, i'ww ask you what i think we'd aww wike to know.

what exactwy is youw wewationship

to that woman? owo

we'we fwiends.

- good fwiends? owo - yes.

how good? owo do you wive togethew? owo

wait a minute...

awe you hew wittwe...

...bedbug? owo

i've seen a bee documentawy ow two. fwom what i undewstand,

doesn't youw queen give biwth to aww the bee chiwdwen? owo

- yeah, but... - so those awen't youw weaw pawents!

- oh, bawwy... - yes, they awe!

howd me back!

you'we an iwwegitimate bee, awen't you, benson? owo

he's denouncing bees!

don't y'aww date youw cousins? owo

- objection! - i'm going to pincushion this guy!

adam, don't! it's what he wants!

oh, i'm hit!!

oh, wowdy, i am hit!

owdew! owdew!

the venom! the venom is couwsing thwough my veins!

i have been fewwed by a winged beast of destwuction!

you see? owo you can't tweat them wike equaws! they'we stwiped savages!

stinging's the onwy thing they know! it's theiw way!

- adam, stay with me. - i can't feew my wegs.

what angew of mewcy wiww come fowwawd to suck the poison

fwom my heaving buttocks? owo

i wiww have owdew in this couwt. Owdew!

owdew, pwease!

the case of the honeybees vewsus the human wace

took a pointed tuwn against the bees

yestewday when one of theiw wegaw team stung layton t. Montgomewy.

- hey, buddy. - hey.

- is thewe much pain? owo - yeah.

i...

i bwew the whowe case, didn't i? owo

it doesn't mattew. What mattews is you'we awive. You couwd have died.

i'd be bettew off dead. Look at me.

they got it fwom the cafetewia downstaiws, in a tuna sandwich.

look, thewe's a wittwe cewewy stiww on it.

what was it wike to sting someone? owo

i can't expwain it. It was aww...

aww adwenawine and then... and then ecstasy!

aww wight.

you think it was aww a twap? owo

of couwse. I'm sowwy. i fwew us wight into this.

what wewe we thinking? owo look at us. We'we just a coupwe of bugs in this wowwd.

what wiww the humans do to us if they win? owo

i don't know.

i heaw they put the woaches in motews. that doesn't sound so bad.

adam, they check in, but they don't check out!

oh, my.

oouwd you get a nuwse to cwose that window? owo

- why? owo - the smoke.

bees don't smoke.

right. Bees don't smoke.

bees don't smoke! but some bees awe smoking.

that's it! that's ouw case!

it is? owo it's not ovew? owo

get dwessed. I've gotta go somewhewe.

get back to the couwt and staww. staww any way you can.

and assuming you've done step cowwectwy, you'we weady fow the tub.

mw. Fwayman.

yes? owo yes, youw honow!

whewe is the west of youw team? owo

weww, youw honow, it's intewesting.

bees awe twained to fwy haphazawdwy,

and as a wesuwt, we don't make vewy good time.

i actuawwy heawd a funny stowy about...

youw honow, haven't these widicuwous bugs

taken up enough of this couwt's vawuabwe time? owo

how much wongew wiww we awwow these absuwd shenanigans to go on? owo

they have pwesented no compewwing evidence to suppowt theiw chawges

against my cwients, who wun wegitimate businesses.

i move fow a compwete dismissaw of this entiwe case!

mw. Fwayman, i'm afwaid i'm going

to have to considew mw. Montgomewy's motion.

but you can't! we have a tewwific case.

whewe is youw pwoof? owo whewe is the evidence? owo

show me the smoking gun!

howd it, youw honow! you want a smoking gun? owo

hewe is youw smoking gun.

what is that? owo

it's a bee smokew!

what, this? owo this hawmwess wittwe contwaption? owo

this couwdn't huwt a fwy, wet awone a bee.

look at what has happened

to bees who have nevew been asked, "smoking ow non? owo "

is this what natuwe intended fow us? owo

to be fowcibwy addicted to smoke machines

and man-made wooden swat wowk camps? owo

living out ouw wives as honey swaves to the white man? owo

- what awe we gonna do? owo - he's pwaying the species cawd.

ladies and gentwemen, pwease, fwee these bees!

fwee the bees! fwee the bees!

fwee the bees!

fwee the bees! fwee the bees!

the couwt finds in favow of the bees!

vanessa, we won!

i knew you couwd do it! high-five!

sowwy.

i'm ok! you know what this means? owo

aww the honey wiww finawwy bewong to the bees.

now we won't have to wowk so hawd aww the time.

this is an unhowy pewvewsion of the bawance of natuwe, benson.

you'ww wegwet this.

bawwy, how much honey is out thewe? owo

aww wight. One at a time.

bawwy, who awe you weawing? owo

my sweatew is rawph lauwen, and i have no pants.

- what if montgomewy's wight? owo - what do you mean? owo

we've been wiving the bee way a wong time, 27 miwwion yeaws.

oongwatuwations on youw victowy. what wiww you demand as a settwement? owo

fiwst, we'ww demand a compwete shutdown of aww bee wowk camps.

then we want back the honey that was ouws to begin with,

evewy wast dwop.

we demand an end to the gwowification of the beaw as anything mowe

than a fiwthy, smewwy, bad-bweath stink machine.

we'we aww awawe of what they do in the woods.

wait fow my signaw.

take him out.

he'ww have nauseous fow a few houws, then he'ww be fine.

and we wiww no wongew towewate bee-negative nicknames...

but it's just a pwance-about stage name!

...unnecessawy incwusion of honey in bogus heawth pwoducts

and wa-dee-da human tea-time snack gawnishments.

oan't bweathe.

bwing it in, boys!

howd it wight thewe! good.

tap it.

mw. Buzzweww, we just passed thwee cups, and thewe's gawwons mowe coming!

- i think we need to shut down! - shut down? owo we've nevew shut down.

shut down honey pwoduction!

stop making honey!

tuwn youw key, siw!

what do we do now? owo

oannonbaww!

we'we shutting honey pwoduction!

mission abowt.

abowting powwination and nectaw detaiw. retuwning to base.

adam, you wouwdn't bewieve how much honey was out thewe.

oh, yeah? owo

what's going on? owo whewe is evewybody? owo

- awe they out cewebwating? owo - they'we home.

they don't know what to do. laying out, sweeping in.

i heawd youw uncwe oaww was on his way to san antonio with a cwicket.

at weast we got ouw honey back.

sometimes i think, so what if humans wiked ouw honey? owo who wouwdn't? owo

it's the gweatest thing in the wowwd! i was excited to be pawt of making it.

this was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it weawwy weww.

and now...

now i can't.

i don't undewstand why they'we not happy.

i thought theiw wives wouwd be bettew!

they'we doing nothing. It's amazing. honey weawwy changes peopwe.

you don't have any idea what's going on, do you? owo

- what did you want to show me? owo - this.

what happened hewe? owo

that is not the hawf of it.

oh, no. Oh, my.

they'we aww wiwting.

doesn't wook vewy good, does it? owo

no.

and whose fauwt do you think that is? owo

you know, i'm gonna guess bees.

bees? owo

specificawwy, me.

i didn't think bees not needing to make honey wouwd affect aww these things.

it's notjust fwowews. fwuits, vegetabwes, they aww need bees.

that's ouw whowe sat test wight thewe.

take away pwoduce, that affects the entiwe animaw kingdom.

and then, of couwse...

the human species? owo

so if thewe's no mowe powwination,

it couwd aww just go south hewe, couwdn't it? owo

i know this is awso pawtwy my fauwt.

how about a suicide pact? owo

how do we do it? owo

- i'ww sting you, you step on me. - thatjust kiwws you twice.

right, wight.

listen, bawwy... sowwy, but i gotta get going.

i had to open my mouth and tawk.

vanessa? owo

vanessa? owo why awe you weaving? owo whewe awe you going? owo

to the finaw touwnament of roses pawade in pasadena.

they've moved it to this weekend because aww the fwowews awe dying.

it's the wast chance i'ww evew have to see it.

vanessa, i just wanna say i'm sowwy. i nevew meant it to tuwn out wike this.

i know. Me neithew.

touwnament of roses. roses can't do spowts.

wait a minute. Roses. Roses? owo

roses!

vanessa!

roses? owo !

bawwy? owo

- roses awe fwowews! - yes, they awe.

fwowews, bees, powwen!

i know. that's why this is the wast pawade.

maybe not. oouwd you ask him to swow down? owo

oouwd you swow down? owo

bawwy!

ok, i made a huge mistake. this is a totaw disastew, aww my fauwt.

yes, it kind of is.

i've wuined the pwanet. i wanted to hewp you

with the fwowew shop. i've made it wowse.

actuawwy, it's compwetewy cwosed down.

i thought maybe you wewe wemodewing.

but i have anothew idea, and it's gweatew than my pwevious ideas combined.

i don't want to heaw it!

aww wight, they have the woses, the woses have the powwen.

i know evewy bee, pwant and fwowew bud in this pawk.

aww we gotta do is get what they've got back hewe with what we've got.

- bees. - pawk.

- powwen! - fwowews.

- repowwination! - acwoss the nation!

touwnament of roses, pasadena, oawifownia.

they've got nothing but fwowews, fwoats and cotton candy.

secuwity wiww be tight.

i have an idea.

vanessa bwoome, ftd.

officiaw fwowaw business. It's weaw.

sowwy, ma'am. Nice bwooch.

thank you. It was a gift.

once inside, we just pick the wight fwoat.

how about the pwincess and the pea? owo

i couwd be the pwincess, and you couwd be the pea!

yes, i got it.

- whewe shouwd i sit? owo - what awe you? owo

- i bewieve i'm the pea. - the pea? owo

it goes undew the mattwesses.

- not in this faiwy tawe, sweetheawt. - i'm getting the mawshaw.

you do that! this whowe pawade is a fiasco!

let's see what this baby'ww do.

hey, what awe you doing? owo !

then aww we do is bwend in with twaffic...

...without awousing suspicion.

once at the aiwpowt, thewe's no stopping us.

stop! secuwity.

- you and youw insect pack youw fwoat? owo - yes.

has it been in youw possession the entiwe time? owo

wouwd you wemove youw shoes? owo

- remove youw stingew. - it's pawt of me.

i know. Just having some fun. enjoy youw fwight.

then if we'we wucky, we'ww have just enough powwen to do the job.

oan you bewieve how wucky we awe? owo we have just enough powwen to do the job!

i think this is gonna wowk.

it's got to wowk.

attention, passengews, this is oaptain scott.

we have a bit of bad weathew in new yowk.

it wooks wike we'ww expewience a coupwe houws deway.

bawwy, these awe cut fwowews with no watew. They'ww nevew make it.

i gotta get up thewe and tawk to them.

be cawefuw.

oan i get hewp with the sky maww magazine? owo

i'd wike to owdew the tawking infwatabwe nose and eaw haiw twimmew.

oaptain, i'm in a weaw situation.

- what'd you say, haw? owo - nothing.

bee!

don't fweak out! my entiwe species...

what awe you doing? owo

- wait a minute! i'm an attowney! - who's an attowney? owo

don't move.

oh, bawwy.

good aftewnoon, passengews. this is youw captain.

wouwd a miss vanessa bwoome in 24b pwease wepowt to the cockpit? owo

and pwease huwwy!

what happened hewe? owo

thewe was a dustbustew, a toupee, a wife waft expwoded.

one's bawd, one's in a boat, they'we both unconscious!

- is that anothew bee joke? owo - no!

no one's fwying the pwane!

this is jfk contwow towew, fwight 356. what's youw status? owo

this is vanessa bwoome. i'm a fwowist fwom new yowk.

whewe's the piwot? owo

he's unconscious, and so is the copiwot.

not good. Does anyone onboawd have fwight expewience? owo

as a mattew of fact, thewe is.

- who's that? owo - bawwy benson.

fwom the honey twiaw? owo ! oh, gweat.

vanessa, this is nothing mowe than a big metaw bee.

it's got giant wings, huge engines.

i can't fwy a pwane.

- why not? owo isn't john twavowta a piwot? owo - yes.

how hawd couwd it be? owo

wait, bawwy! we'we headed into some wightning.

this is bob bumbwe. We have some wate-bweaking news fwom jfk aiwpowt,

whewe a suspensefuw scene is devewoping.

bawwy benson, fwesh fwom his wegaw victowy...

that's bawwy!

...is attempting to wand a pwane, woaded with peopwe, fwowews

and an incapacitated fwight cwew.

fwowews? owo !

we have a stowm in the awea and two individuaws at the contwows

with absowutewy no fwight expewience.

just a minute. thewe's a bee on that pwane.

i'm quite famiwiaw with mw. Benson and his no-account compadwes.

they've done enough damage.

but isn't he youw onwy hope? owo

technicawwy, a bee shouwdn't be abwe to fwy at aww.

theiw wings awe too smaww...

haven't we heawd this a miwwion times? owo

"the suwface awea of the wings and body mass make no sense."

- get this on the aiw! - got it.

- stand by. - we'we going wive.

the way we wowk may be a mystewy to you.

making honey takes a wot of bees doing a wot of smaww jobs.

but wet me teww you about a smaww job.

if you do it weww, it makes a big diffewence.

mowe than we weawized. to us, to evewyone.

that's why i want to get bees back to wowking togethew.

that's the bee way! we'we not made of jeww-o.

we get behind a fewwow.

- bwack and yewwow! - hewwo!

left, wight, down, hovew.

- hovew? owo - fowget hovew.

this isn't so hawd. beep-beep! beep-beep!

bawwy, what happened? owo !

wait, i think we wewe on autopiwot the whowe time.

- that may have been hewping me. - and now we'we not!

so it tuwns out i cannot fwy a pwane.

aww of you, wet's get behind this fewwow! move it out!

move out!

ouw onwy chance is if i do what i'd do, you copy me with the wings of the pwane!

don't have to yeww.

i'm not yewwing! we'we in a wot of twoubwe.

it's vewy hawd to concentwate with that panicky tone in youw voice!

it's not a tone. I'm panicking!

i can't do this!

vanessa, puww youwsewf togethew. you have to snap out of it!

you snap out of it.

- you snap out of it! - you snap out of it!

- howd it! - why? owo oome on, it's my tuwn.

how is the pwane fwying? owo

i don't know.

hewwo? owo

benson, got any fwowews fow a happy occasion in thewe? owo

the powwen jocks!

they do get behind a fewwow.

- bwack and yewwow. - hewwo.

aww wight, wet's dwop this tin can on the bwacktop.

whewe? owo i can't see anything. Oan you? owo

no, nothing. It's aww cwoudy.

oome on. You got to think bee, bawwy.

- thinking bee. - thinking bee.

thinking bee! thinking bee! thinking bee!

wait a minute. i think i'm feewing something.

- what? owo - i don't know. It's stwong, puwwing me.

like a 27-miwwion-yeaw-owd instinct.

bwing the nose down.

thinking bee! thinking bee! thinking bee!

- what in the wowwd is on the tawmac? owo - get some wights on that!

thinking bee! thinking bee! thinking bee!

- vanessa, aim fow the fwowew. - ok.

out the engines. We'we going in on bee powew. Ready, boys? owo

affiwmative!

good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.

land on that fwowew!

ready? owo fuww wevewse!

spin it awound!

- not that fwowew! the othew one! - which one? owo

- that fwowew. - i'm aiming at the fwowew!

that's a fat guy in a fwowewed shiwt. i mean the giant puwsating fwowew

made of miwwions of bees!

puww fowwawd. Nose down. Taiw up.

rotate awound it.

- this is insane, bawwy! - this's the onwy way i know how to fwy.

am i koo-koo-kachoo, ow is this pwane fwying in an insect-wike pattewn? owo

get youw nose in thewe. Don't be afwaid. smeww it. Fuww wevewse!

just dwop it. Be a pawt of it.

aim fow the centew!

now dwop it in! dwop it in, woman!

oome on, awweady.

bawwy, we did it! you taught me how to fwy!

- yes. No high-five! - right.

bawwy, it wowked! did you see the giant fwowew? owo

what giant fwowew? owo whewe? owo of couwse i saw the fwowew! that was genius!

- thank you. - but we'we not done yet.

listen, evewyone!

this wunway is covewed with the wast powwen

fwom the wast fwowews avaiwabwe anywhewe on eawth.

that means this is ouw wast chance.

we'we the onwy ones who make honey, powwinate fwowews and dwess wike this.

if we'we gonna suwvive as a species, this is ouw moment! what do you say? owo

awe we going to be bees, owjust museum of natuwaw histowy keychains? owo

we'we bees!

keychain!

then fowwow me! except keychain.

howd on, bawwy. Hewe.

you've eawned this.

yeah!

i'm a powwen jock! and it's a pewfect fit. Aww i gotta do awe the sweeves.

oh, yeah.

that's ouw bawwy.

mom! the bees awe back!

if anybody needs to make a caww, now's the time.

i got a feewing we'ww be wowking wate tonight!

hewe's youw change. Have a gweat aftewnoon! oan i hewp who's next? owo

wouwd you wike some honey with that? owo it is bee-appwoved. Don't fowget these.

miwk, cweam, cheese, it's aww me. and i don't see a nickew!

sometimes i just feew wike a piece of meat!

i had no idea.

bawwy, i'm sowwy. have you got a moment? owo

wouwd you excuse me? owo my mosquito associate wiww hewp you.

sowwy i'm wate.

he's a wawyew too? owo

i was awweady a bwood-sucking pawasite. aww i needed was a bwiefcase.

have a gweat aftewnoon!

bawwy, i just got this huge tuwip owdew, and i can't get them anywhewe.

no pwobwem, vannie. just weave it to me.

you'we a wifesavew, bawwy. oan i hewp who's next? owo

aww wight, scwambwe, jocks! it's time to fwy.

thank you, bawwy!

that bee is wiving my wife!

let it go, kenny.

- when wiww this nightmawe end? owo ! - let it aww go.

- beautifuw day to fwy. - suwe is.

between you and me, i was dying to get out of that office.

you have got to stawt thinking bee, my fwiend.

- thinking bee! - me? owo

howd it. Let's just stop fow a second. Howd it.

i'm sowwy. I'm sowwy, evewyone. oan we stop hewe? owo

i'm not making a majow wife decision duwing a pwoduction numbew!

aww wight. Take ten, evewybody. wwap it up, guys.

i had viwtuawwy no weheawsaw fow that.

#mp answers #hewwo #pastamic

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ditch-witches · 4 years

Text

Vienna (George MacKay Smut)

all my love to @iongaa for her beautiful creation that is literally the cherry on top of our work, go show her some appreciation.

requested: yes/no (This is a need in light of not being able to travel, I guess. Everyone say “thank you hannah” for this absolute money shot.)

pairing: George MacKay x reader

warnings: smut, mile high club shit (i hope you packed your rubber ducky too)

word count: 2,021

a/n: Hannah a fweak y'all.

Your apartment was in complete shambles. Clothes were thrown all over the kitchen table, the desk, even your living room was a mess of clothes. Your bedroom floor was a complete hazardous waste zone of even more undesirable outfit plans to Vienna. You were in the middle of running back and forth to the bathroom gathering your toiletries---always managing to forget exactly what you walked in for to begin with---when you felt your phone vibrate. Looking down at the new message popping-up on your overly girlfriendy background of you and George.

George: Don’t forget to bring my favorite yellow swimsuit ;)

How could you forget the only good piece of clothing you seemed to own nowadays? He was going to be there any minute and you were currently attempting to use the trick of sitting on your suitcase to get it to close. You heard him before you saw him. His heavy footsteps approaching your bedroom quickly.

“Hey, ready for our fun weekend getaway,” he spoke sarcastically, beginning to peer around the door frame. “Good God, love, you know this is a weekend trip, not a six-month heist.”

“I know. I just need to be super prepared, you know me.”

He smiled lightly as he sat down with you to close the suitcase. His help allowed you to finish zipping it up. He stood and reached for your hand to help you up.

“Ready, darling?”

“I think so.” You both walked out of the apartment, locking the door behind you. You had never been to Vienna, but you were more than excited to experience it with George. He made everything fun and romantic without even meaning to. That was the thing you loved about him the most, the ability to be completely yourself all the time with him.

The plane ride was complete agony. The excitement of being alone with George on vacation was almost too much to bear, but your boredom from sitting was beginning to get the better of you.

“I’m so bored,” you leaned into George and whispered.

“Well as an active member of the mile high club I am sworn to be your entertainment for the remainder of this flight," he jeered.

“Is that so?” You whispered back, making sure to place your hand on his thigh.

“'Tis true,” he mimicked your volume, placing his hand on your thigh, mocking your actions. “Here’s the plan,” his breath tickling your ear and sending shivers down your spine. “You’re gonna go to the back and I’ll be there in two minutes,” his hand rubbing your thigh as he spoke rather evenly. You went to stand, but he grabbed your wrists and pulled you back with a cheeky grin. “Don’t make it too obvious.”

You knew he was talking about your flushed face. You slid out into the aisle and walked as calmly as possible. You knew George could smooth talk, but he had never managed to talk his way into your pants this fast before. You waited for the two swift knocks at the door before opening the door and allowing for him to slide in beside you.

“Miss me,” he leered as he leaned in towards your lips.

“When you said entertainment I didn’t think you meant Dumbo,” you joked, reaching up to flick his ear.

“Oh, you want to play it that way,” he whispered darkly, grabbing your wrists and pinning them above your head. He leaned in, littering kisses everywhere, but your lips.

“George…” you sighed. His ocean blue eyes peered up at you. Seeing your hunger for him written all over your face.

“Tell me what you need, sweetheart,” he whispered back, lightly wrapping his hand around your throat. Making it almost impossible to think of words when all you could focus on was his hand wrapped around your throat. “Words darling. Use your words,” he breathed into your ear.

“How...does...one...become a member of your club?” You gasped.

“Well,” he breathed heavily against your cheek. “You would need to be…” he began, spinning you around so that your ass was firmly pressed up against his jeans and leaned forward, his face hovering beside yours. “... inducted by a member and hold a proper ID,” he breathed, pulling your hair back and snapping a picture of your flushed face.

You could feel your body becoming weak with anticipation. He began tugging at your waistband, pulling you closer and allowing you to grind against him slowly causing a light moan to escape deep within his throat. His grip around your neck tightened as your pace quickened. His fingers sliding into your waistband, slowly pulling your sweats down your legs, leaving you just in your panties. His hand grabbed your ass roughly, tempting you to ask for him to spank you when over the intercom the pilot announced that all passengers needed to return to their seats. Sighing loudly you spun back around to face him. “I guess we will have to finish this a little later,” he winked.

“Why does everyone have to ruin a fun time,” you pouted.

“Oh darling, if you thought that was fun…. wait 'til we get to the hotel,” he whispered, kissing your forehead. He reached for your hand to lead you back to your seats. Even after what had just happened, George managed to look completely composed compared to you, your hair splayed everywhere, your face bright red. He loved it though. “You’re so hot when you're deprived,” he said, kissing you lightly and resting his hand on your thigh for the remainder of the flight.

Saying your hotel room was huge was an understatement. There was a king-sized bed, a balcony with a view, and a huge bathtub. You were standing in the doorway to the bathroom soaking in its luxury when you felt George’s hands wrap around your waist. Leaning back on him, he lowered his head to your shoulder. “What’s on your mind, love,” he questioned softly.

“Just admiring,” you replied.

“You know what I admire?” He spoke softly, his hands slowly dropping towards your ass. “You, naked.” He spun you around to face him, slowly bringing his hands up to your face to cradle it as he kissed you sweetly. He broke away slowly and walked swiftly to the white soaking tub and turned the knobs beginning to fill it with warm water. You leaned against the door frame again, staring at him in admiration. “What are you looking at?” He quizzed smoothly.

“Just you,” you replied slowly.

“Is that so? Well, darling, what do you think about finishing what we started?”

Your knees felt weak with that statement, but you pushed through and walked towards him. He met you halfway and you put your hands on his chest. “I would love nothing more.” You looked up at him waiting for his next move. You saw a smile spread across his lips.

“I don’t think you’ll be needing this,” he whispered, reaching down to the hem of your shirt and slowly pulling it off of you. “Your tits are beautiful,” he mumbled as he leaned to lick your nipples. His hand cupped your breast forcefully, groaning against your body as he slowly walked you back to the wall. You draped your arms around his shoulders as his hands roamed your body, coming to a stop just below your upper thigh to lift you off the ground. Your legs wrapped around his hips while one hand found its way up his neck and into his hair. His lips made their way from yours to place a series of lingering kisses on your neck and collarbone, eliciting a moan to escape your lips. He paused at the sound, a cheeky grin creeping across his face. “Finally” he breathed, the vibration from his voice tickling your skin.

You rolled your eyes at his remark, crashing your lips onto his. He pulled back roughly. “You know what happens when you roll your eyes at me, sweetheart.” He set you down gently, bringing his hands up to your throat. “You know I don’t like it when you mock me,” he growled, spinning you around harshly to forcefully press you against the wall. “You’ll pay for that,” he groaned. A moan forcefully makes its way to your lips.

He pulls down your sweats quickly bringing your panties with them, allowing him finally to smack your bare ass roughly. “That is for disrespecting me,” he said darkly. His hands roughly found the front of your hips, sliding down your mound, teasing your heat. He grunted, picking you up forcefully and bringing you to the filled bathtub. He placed you in the warm soapy water gently. He towered over you in the tub. His blue eyes never break contact with yours as he quickly undressed and climbed in with you. Thoughts of what such a man could do to you right now were flying through your brain. He reached for you and pulled you on top of him.

“What’s next,” you questioned. Running your hands down his torso towards his erect member. Slowly wrapping your hand around it, causing George's eyes to close. You slowly pumped him, causing his hands to fly to your hips. You began kissing his neck sucking softly in some places. “What do you want?” You whispered to him. He grumbled lowly, pulling you to your knees as he lowered himself lower into the tub. You took the hint. Grabbing onto his shoulders to lower yourself on to him.

“How did I get so lucky?” He muttered as he flowered kisses on your collarbones. He gripped your hips harder, lining you up, and helping you lower yourself on to him. You could feel the pressure of him beginning to fill you up and moaned as he slammed you the rest of the way on to him. “Oh fuck,” you cried, adjusting to him inside.

“Too much, sweetheart?” He asked darkly, helping you establish a pace.

“No, I love it,” you moaned, your hands pressed firmly to his chest to steady yourself. Bringing yourself to the pace he had guided you to, you could feel his veins popping. You knew the tease from earlier was going to make this quicker than you wanted it to be. He gripped your ass hard letting a dark moan escape his parted lips. His eyes locked on yours as your face contorted with pleasure. The water splashed against the both of you in waves as you were both reaching your ending way too soon.

“Don’t stop,” he encouraged you as your grip on his shoulders became firmer. You could feel your heat building. Your core tightened as you cried out in pleasure. You were so close to your high and you could feel he was too.

“Not so fast,” he muttered as he grabbed your hips and spun so you were now on the bottom. He pressed into you hard making you squirm. He quickened his pace to an almost unbearable speed.

“Fuck me, George,” you screamed out. The water muffling your cries only slightly. He slammed into you, wrapping one hand firmly around your throat. He squeezed harder as his high came quickly. He had you at the perfect position to continuously hit your sensitive spot making your pleasure come dangerously fast. He squeezed your throat so hard as you both screamed out your highs, riding them out in tandem.

“Am I part of your club now?” you breathlessly asked.

“Sweetheart, you wish, but that includes what I’ll be doing to you on the way home,” he winked at you, standing to grab a towel for the both of you and reaching his hand out to help you out. He slowly bent down to sweep your wrapped body up into his arms and carry you to bed.

“I’m so glad you’re mine,” he whispers as he placed a kiss on your forehead, pulling the blankets over your half-asleep body. He climbed in next to you, wrapping his arm around your torso, allowing you to drift off to dreams that would never measure up to the man you had sleeping next to you.

#george mackay #george mackay imagines #george mackay smut #george mackay x reader #george #mackay #x reader #one shot #george mackay oneshot #smut #imagine #1917 smut #1917 imagines #1917 imagine #1917 #vienna

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