#i love you straight yaoi

[dearinglovebot]

every post that says "[insert movie] did the spy genre better than argylle" fails to understand the main appeal of argylle. which is straight homosexuality. is the main character in that spy movie implied to be transgender by the narrative? no? then you've failed to convince me to watch. does the main character write best selling fanfiction of her and her boyfriend as gay men? no? i've lost interest. is the main character implied to be bisexual through her male alter ego's romantic interactions with women and blatant male love interest? no? i just yawned. i don't care if you know a better movie with a "spy loses her memories" plot. does the main character's male alter ego ride off into the sunset with his male "life partner"? it doesn't, does it? i rest my case your honor

#argylle #i love you straight yaoi #you're telling me a queer coded this

[cowboy-robooty]

PEOPLE KEEP DENYING HIM HIS FIVE HEAD..... LET HIM BE UGLY AS SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#sorry guys i just see this with germany fans sometimes and when i do i can feel all the bloodvessels in my eyes exploding #HES OUR UGLY WIFE #OUR UGLY AS SHIT HUSBAND #ACCEPT HIM FOR WHO HE IS #i genuinely love germany being so fucking ugly okay literally in a yaoi i read when the author made a spinoff volume for the side couple #they had to change the hairstyle bc the character had germanys normal hairstyle and it was so fucking ugly the editor legit said #change that shit or else nobody is gunna buy that yaoi literally GERMANY IS STRAIGHT UP UGLY. LET HIM BE UGLY!!!!!!! #i get incellic rage that aint my boy thats not my germany chan you gotta put his shiney huge fivehead on full display #being ugly is a central component of his character he is not germany if hes not ugly asf #hetalia #aph #hws #aph germany #hws germany #draws

[protagfolly]

my before team + another sinner ocs...

before team: sharkboy and lavagirl

sinner: savannah reed

#we like to have fun here. #''why did you make sharkboy and lavagirl lccb'' HOP OFF ME #i love to make lcb characters out of the craziest sources #unironically i watched sharkboy & lavagirl with my girlfriend recently and they remind me of effiesaude so much #it hurts. straight yaoi straight yuri yag theyre everything #as for savannah reed #if you thjnk about it. lps popular is kind of like canto iii #ive been showing my friends lps popular and its a blast #anyway #personal #limbus company #lcb #limbus company au #lcb au #lps popular #project moon #pjm #lcb oc #limbus oc #limbus company oc #project moon oc

[milkbreadtoast]

been seeing random bl videos on my youtube recs lately and they all look like cedjess... help this is so funny

#ok these r only 2 examples but. waiting for youtube to show me another one #cedjess is the cutest ofc but this is so funny #blackhair/blonde hair yaoi never misses i tell you #QPB author-nim if u wanted cedric and jesse to be straight love interests instead of shipped together why did u design them like this HMM #/j #thank god for twsb <333

[bylovesfirstkiss]

you guys just don't know how to write angst anymore. putting people who say they like "toxic yaoi" in my dni cause they have no idea how to actually write toxicity

#I feel like a lot of this toxic blah blah stuff is fancy internet lingo to avoid accusations that you just enjoy abusive dynamics #without actually developing them or doing anything interesting. like if you're gonna say you love toxicity and codependency #and then just make fluff and smut about it without actually taking the time to explore and deconstruct it #then you're romanticizing it. are you not? #especially when the pairing in question has had extremely negative (beyond the scope of basic enemies to lovers) encounters in canon #just because you're using cutesy tumblr.com lingo doesn't mean you're absolved of actual development #and I'm saying this as someone who really likes this kind of trope because it gives room for monumental character exploration #and as a victim of abuse myself. I'm not saying write an essay I'm just saying why hype up how toxic and shitty they are for each other #just to turn it into fluff/a meme. like the actual negative parts of the dynamic don't matter? I though you guys condemned romanticization. #it's genuinely fascinating how the internet will deem one pairing abusive and bad but another with the same dynamic is just toxic yaoi? #I'm not sure where the line is drawn but you can't have your cake and eat it too. #and if you're going to try tackling a dynamic that's heavily abusive (“toxic”) then you can at least try to #justify it in a way that isn't just 'um well funny fandom meme ☝️' #you just want to skip all the development and get straight to the gushy parts? fine. not saying you can't. I can't tell you what to do. #but it does massively cheapen the dynamic and make it seem like you don't actually care about the characters you just want to ship somethin #I HATE CANON X CANON!! #slash nobody here #decrees

[woolydemon]

i am so apathetic to popular male transformers characters, but i have a simple trick to make me care abt them: i turn them into robot women then i suddenly start seeing their appeal

#grimlock would be so awesome as a butch woman. DO YOU HEAR ME DOES ANYBODY HEAR ME HELLOOOO #also crazy in depth conversation i had abt this made me think abt why i get rlly. apathetic abt popular tf characters #esp when i realize all the popular characters im Whatever abt are all men #but i always have interest in the female ones and also the niche little weird guys #you are looking at rare scrounge fan. rare wheelie fan. and Number 1 Fan of Blurr* #*when hes a dorky weird anxious guy. yknow the ones ppl dont care abt bc hes “annoying” and “ugly” #i dont give as much of a shit abt the handsome cocky racer blurrs #i realize. because tf fandom has a weird thing abt only caring abt how attractive a character is #and tends to gravitate to male characters for that aspect #like lets be real here. there is such a high priority in this fandom for what characters look best in porn. im right. #and ppl love the yaoi robots for that. #and i. am on the aroace spectrum. and do not find as much attraction in men (though i do sometimes. just less so) #so this doesnt appeal to me #so i find myself so incredibly apathetic or a hater to a lot of the tf fandom bc of this #in turn i do not care so much for the popular characters or straight up see them as red flags (admittedly im a bit irrational for this tho) #a lot of times i get a feeling like “ok whats so special abt this guy. its just another conventionally attractive man" it feels boring to m #so that might explain why i become more interested in these characters if they arent men #this is all being said from a nonbinary person that leans more transmasc btw. just noting that. #rando thoughtz

[thedevilsrain]

i do love from eroica with love and patalliro for having nato & mi6 spy characters who are A Son Of A Nazi and A Predator respectively

#eroica especially which so often is just straight up propaganda #like showing how COOL the planes and the uniforms and the buildings they are #only for in the end its like. yeah the main guys dad was a nazi. and if you ask him about it he says MY DAD WASNT THAT BAD OKAY ! #and w patalliro. well its not Perfect but like when you read th manga u know bancoran is a stupid piece of shit yk? even if hes lovable/coo #meanwhile with eroica you kinda have to read inbetween the lines a little bit and maybe even do research #but yeah anyway i do love my stupid manga with my awful men. theyre horrible. sometimes its fun sometimes its not. happens to the best of u #led zeppelin shoujo yaoi manga tag #tw nazi mention #ask 2 tag

[todayisafridaynight]

Ok but here's also some shit I remember about Yakuza 4 that absolutely tickles me

Akiyama is a stupid slut who thinks a single row of books is enough to hide his big money vault; that he has more chemistry with Arai and Tanimura than Yasuko (the girl he's pining over because he looks like his old crush that he somehow hasn't gotten over yet); and that Mack called him a "washed up p0rnstar". He is hilarious when he's not being creepy to Yasuko.

One of Akiyama's revelations involves a panty thief falling off a building in slow motion to overly dramatical classical music as underwear flies everywhere (or something like that)

Nair was the best character in the game and deserved her own spinoff

Hana deserved better than [gestures to the entire game] this

Some random, non-Majima related Saejima things: his mentor makes him punch rocks in some underground tunnels to get stronger; he pulls out a big chunk of wood and starts carving whenever he has a revelation; the developers thought Kido - a Wocky Kitoky ass looking kid - would make a good final boss for him; the scene where he finally reunites with his old oyabun is absolutely devastating

considerin you remember more akiyama stuff the most i think if we wrangled that other anon who remembered stuff about saejima and we get two more people who remembered more abuot kiryu and tanimura we can make a vague composite of Y4's plot

#snap chats #youre so right about akiyama and Everyone But Yasuko tho its so funny #RGG not being able to write women leads to things like this where straight people just cant exist #arai and akiyama are literally yaoi divorced idc about akiyamas ex #SPEAKING OF THO WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THAT ? LIT WHAT WAS THE POINT #IS IT SO HE'D HELP HER CAUSE I THOUGHT HE JUST DOES THAT ANYWAY #see this is why we ignore Y4 akiyama a fuckin weirdo in it but in Y5 he's the best uncle you could ask for #at least until Y6 then where the FUCK was he when haruka was alone #wait help i just remembered the akiyama fight fro Y6 and i love how if the fight goes on long enough #akiyama's just :(( Kiryu Please I Dont Want To Fight You :((( #i forgot to make an appreciation post for that whole fight my god what is wrong with me #im so off topic anyway yeah youre right i remember the underground boulder fist fighting too <3 #HANA DID DESERVE BETTER THOUGH SHE'S LITERALLY TOO GOOD FOR THIS SERIES #why the fuck they make her skinny in ishin boys we riot

[danothan]

omg i didnt even tell you guys, my gc ranked each member as most to least likely to enjoy yaoi and i got placed last. their reasoning was “likes sitcoms” i always fucking win

#danbles #its bc im surrounded by anime dorks #and like i love anime but my fav ship from fucking JOJO is straight i think that says a lot abt me #unfortunately this leaves me unable to refer to tomgreg as yaoi but they soo are </3 #charmacden? advanced yaoi #jyvik? not a sitcom but it’s got its yaoisms #sorry if this is a term that upsets you i understand the connotations but im only being ironic #like. yaoi isn’t even like that to me yaoi is a sister to me #edit: and what is tomshiv? why that’s yuri of course #okay ill stop now

[m0e-ru]

ifyou are my friend and you draw slutty adachi i love you still i’ll kiss you on the mouth even. everyone else um. explode immediately

#kommento #// this post applies to sogabe.he babygirls him and i still read his manga godbless i love soujiseta #// um. gas station economic crisis era um.all posts are straight up in shambles my uniform is tattered saying bullshit holding out a tin can #// this post applies to everyone who has jumpscared me in my dms and i STILL love you hi guys #// um(still going fucking insane) wow i’m so talkative. you don’t have to interact with me to get dialogue i straight up stop you in your tr #// tracks like a scripted event and i’m an npc you’re so fucking sick of at thispoint #// five posts from now tenchou’s going to post their yaoi log after a whole year and disappear off the face of the earth absolute hypocrite

[pk-sonica-omega]

seeing “yaoi” discourse in ship tags makes me feel like I’m aging every time I see that shit. Is Viddy game homosexuals please. Calm Down. I Thought We Were Done Calling People Fujoshis PLEASE calm down

#putting it in ship tags is what gets me the most #like do you hate fun #do you hate people enjoying fictional characters #I do not care if you do not like the way they're enjoying those characters #because who the fuck cares what some internet person says about video game characters #related note: every so called fujoshi I've ever interacted with ended up being some kind of queer #I don't know what to make of that but I can tell you #90% of these people aren't Straight Cis Fangirls I promise #peace and love on planet yaoi #Sonirant.txt

[dirt-str1der]

Changed my mind about yaoi i think its the greatest thing ever

#Listen to my problems #hi dont read this #i mean i cant stop you but its just a whole lotta penis #like obviously some of it is still objective terrible but oh my GOD some artists are so very talented #i cannot praise ​​kiryu-chan ni korosareru enough for bothering to draw soft cocks like yes ... yess ..... #and in one panel majimers got his arm curled like the frikkin creation of adam picture i love being reminded that joints exist #and the positioning is sublime ... the parts where theyre koving around so much and have to straight up pin each other clutching grabbing . #calves hooked over ankles to press them into the mattress ... #and the classic mating press features as well <33 #and the artist was a genius for drawing that fear taut expression like after the real cocksure ‘gonna eat you alive boy’ face #thank you.... that was truly an epic win for the yaoi community #have i talked about the soft cocks again yet because i loved it for that

[bratbby333]

satosugu & their favorite lady ♡ poly head cannons

`⭐︎ ˑ ִֶָ 𓂃⊹ bc who doesn't love when their two boyfriends are also bf + bf?

nsfw mdni; fem!reader, 3sum, anäl, dbl. penētration, oral, yaoi, use of pet names. banner fan art from pinterest

poor suguru, having to work overtime to keep the two of you in check—your unyielding energy bounces off of satoru's childlike enthusiasm, creating quite an unhinged environment. and of course geto switches into dad-mode when it comes to y'all, but he wouldn't have it any other way...not willing to give up what he has, loving how silly his lovers are.

satoru’s definitely the physical touch lover while suguru handles words of affirmation: they take turns showering you in praise in the form of soft touches and gentle kisses while they removing your clothes, two sets of hands running up and down your soft skin.

this dynamic also manifests in public, with satoru being your go-to for steamy dancing and drunken make-out sessions in the middle of the club, while suguru sits observantly at a table off to the side.

when he finally feels that it’s time to go, he’ll join the two of you on the dance floor, his chest pressed flush with your back as you continue to lock lips with satoru. you grind against him, assuming he's finally joining in on all the fun. but his hands pull at your hips before running up your body and cupping the underside of your jaw, quite literally having to peel your mouth away from satoru's. "hey...wha- i wasn't done," you grumble. suguru only chuckles in response. "let's get outta here, you two..." he mumbles. satoru attempts to reconnect his lips with yours before a stern "satoru," rumbles from suguru's chest. your blue-eyed lover pouts, of course, before reluctantly agreeing.

suguru loves hitting it from the back while you suck satoru off, the sloppy sounds of both your holes filling the heady air the room as the three of you chase your releases

and of course, satoru would get creative and suggest a challenge, a little competition to see who finishes first, just for funsies; "bet i'd last the longest". he'd be so fucking smug about it, too. and nine times out of ten, you and suguru would create an alliance and work together to literally break satoru; not only does he finish first but he cums over, and over, and over again. you and sugu take turns bringing him to his breaking point, and after his third orgasm, he's begging to switch so he can get one of you off instead. but you just can't stop. and why would you? he just looks so pretty as his hips buck off the bed, sweat glistening on his skin with his flustered cheeks and swollen lips, while his body trembles with every gasping breath. you swear he does this shit on purpose, plotting for this outcome because he's been feeling super needy lately.

they just love pleasing their precious girl

you're straddling suguru, your forearms resting against his chest as your nails dig into his skin. satoru is pounding into you from behind, his hands anchored on your hips. he tucks his chin into his clavicle to watch as your gushing cunt sucks him in so greedily. suguru pulls your head down, your cheek resting against his shoulder as his fingers reach under you to play with your clit, sultry words of praise leaving his lips and going straight to your listening ears, "feels good, doesn't it baby? uh uh, don't move. keep takin' him...y'doin so good." you whimper as toru’s impressive length reaches unimaginable depths inside you, the sweet squelches of your needy pussy spurring him on as he drives into you even harder. sugu’s fingers keep working at your throbbing clit while you bite and suck on his neck, interrupted by the symphony of soft ahh’s and ooo’s falling from your swollen lips. a few more rough thrusts and rapid circles against your clit and you’re falling apart on satoru’s cock, spraying all over the their thighs. you gasp and whine when you feel satoru pull out, only for suguru to lift you up and quickly take his place, sheathing himself in your pulsing walls. “you ready, baby?” you glance over you shoulder, watching as satoru sucks his fingers into his mouth, a cheeky smirk on his face, your cock drunk brain too dizzy to respond. you nod, groaning at the feeling of his long, slender digits playing with your ass, dipping in to the second knuckle. satoru works to stretch you out in preparation for you to take them both. your face contorts at the dull ache. "look at me...focus on me, princess," suguru rasps, redirecting your attention to him as he slowly pumps in and out of your gummy walls. your nails scratch down his chest as you rest your forehead against his, breathing deeply in an attempt to relax your body for the inevitable stretch. you already feel so full, your pussy absolutely drenched, your arousal dribbling out around sugu’s girth, but you grow even wetter in anticipation for your two boyfriends to take you at the same time

and if you thought it would be a peaceful transition into sleep after y'all finish fucking, you would be sorely mistaken...the three of you constantly fight for the middle spot in the bed. correction, you and satoru are the ones bickering. as the two of you argue, suguru finds his place and waits for y'all to follow suit, and more often than not, it's suguru in the middle, laying on his back, as you and satoru tuck yourselves under each of his arms and curling into his side, legs thrown over his waist.

it's a very balanced relationship. the three of y'all have your designated nights to cook dinner, your assigned spots on the couch (though you occasionally fight over what to watch), a copasetic routine for showering, going to work, running errands together. and when one of y'all is out of town for work, the two left over keep each other company. it's perfect, a home full of love and laughter.

y'all loooove having threesomes, but sometimes it's too much logistically. and that's totally fine...nothing wrong with some one on one action, whether it be you and toru or sugu and you or the two men having their fun alone.

you arrive home, expecting to be entrapped in a double bearhug by your two boyfriends, only to hear moans and grunts echoing down the hallway. you laugh to yourself as you make your way upstairs. opening the bedroom door, you're greeted by a smiling suguru being topped off by his blond counterpart. "hey baby, how was work?" he asks casually, not even acknowledging the fact that he's actively getting head. you smile softly, walking to the edge of the bed and placing a gentle peck on suguru's waiting lips. "mmm, it was a pretty rough shift...i'm gonna go take a long, hot shower," you reply, exhaustion evident in your voice. satoru sits up, continuing to jerk suguru off. with his free hand, he wipes the spit from his chin, grinning ear to ear as you lean in to kiss him, too. "you sure you don't wanna join us?" "not right now, toru, but i might when i get out," you smile as you walk to the dresser, grabbing a change of clothes before heading toward the master bathroom. you turn back around to face the two of them, giggling at the disappointed looks on their faces. when the door closes, the wet sounds and breathy moans fill the bedroom once more. but of course, not even five minutes into your peaceful shower, your back is pressed up against the tile wall as satoru's tongue laps at your throbbing clit. "this is the best way to decompress, baby," he says before his fingers dip into your core and his lips reattach to your sensitive bud. "f-fuck, toru...feels s'good..." as you surrender to the bliss, you hear the bathroom door open and close. seems like suguru was feeling left out. so much for your alone time, huh?

loneliness is no longer apart of the equation for you. after years of failed relationships and agonizing heartbreaks, you have finally found peace, your yin and yang. you have your boys, and they have you.

author notes: stsg has had me in a fuckin chokehold recently so i had to get this outta my head. i just rly rly want two boyfriends so so bad and i want my two boyfriends to also be boyfriends. ugh. is that too much to ask? ♡

©bratbby333 on tumblr. all rights reserved. please do not distribute. 2024.

#—written by jade 🌿 #dividers by benkeibear #dividers by cafekitsune #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen writing #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk fanfic #jjk smut #jjk x reader #gojo saturo #satoru gojo #satoru smut #gojo smut #gojo x reader smut #jjk x reader smut #gojo x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #suguru geto #geto suguru #geto x reader #suguru geto smut #gojo x reader x geto #jjk gojo #jjk geto #satosugu #satosugu smut #satosugu headcanon #satosugu x reader #satosugu fanfic #bratbby333

[todayisafridaynight]

Daigo looks like the genderbent version of his mom because she girlbossed so hard she created a clone of herself through asexual reproduction

'yayoi cheated' this and 'yayoi cheated' that no you guys she just went through mitosis. that's all.

#snap chats #yayoi shoulda just named daigo yaoi at this point its fine it works #turns out she's too hot for ANY man #she really said 'i'm gonna make the perfect man myself watch this' #sorry queen you still botched it but hey he's at least still alive so. #also i love him very much and i'd cry if i was in the same room as him for even five seconds so to me you succeeded actually #everyone calls daigo cringe and fail but not me i think he's perfect and trying his best #and he was thrown straight into a dumpster fire expecting to put it out from the inside and hey he did Fine for thirteen years didnt he

[cemeterything]

i dont think youve posted much about kabru so i was wondering what your thoughts were on him? i feel like you'd enjoy him a lot. and any opinions on labru (laios x kabru)?

i'm a kabumisu guy sorry to disappoint on that front i'm into a different kind of weirdguy yaoi. but as a character i fucking love kabru so much. he's such an incredibly good and realistic portrayal of someone with complex ptsd from an unresolved and violent traumatic event - his hypervigilance particularly stands out as both an asset and a detriment to his character; it drives him to hone his skills of observation and action, but also blinds him to the possibility that people might be capable of being kind or helpful out of the genuine goodness of their hearts with no ulterior motive. he's such a layered character, too; at first he comes across as an experienced but cocky young adventurer, then you wonder if perhaps he's an antagonistic force to laios' party and their goals, and then you realise that he does, in fact, care a great deal about the future of humanity and the safety and wellbeing of others, as much as any of the other big players in the story, and the way he expresses that has simply been shaped by his unique life experiences. kabru is very much the 'team humanity' character, but in a way that isn't eye-rollingly sanctimonious. he's the straight man (in the trope sense of the word) who has the power to influence a great deal of change and good just by being willing to know when to act to ensure those aims prevail, and when to trust someone else's judgement to see it through, which he comes to learn better as his arc and the story progresses. also, i fucking cheered when i realised that the reason he fares so poorly against the monsters of the dungeon is because he's learned how to disarm and kill other people. i LOVE a character who is fundamentally in favour of protecting human life and safety, but who also sees humanity as its own greatest threat to itself.

#dunmeshi