Tumgik
#i need to start drawing fenris in like.
just1gnome · 19 days
Text
I FORGOT TO POST THIS
Tumblr media
part 2 to the big mermaid fenris post ehe
eadan trying to convince captain isabela that the big fish will NOT eat us and he will be a NET positive for the crew you GOTTA believe me
113 notes · View notes
throneofsapphics · 2 months
Text
old faces, part 10
Rowaelin x f!Reader
Tumblr media
Summary: you and Rowan meet again after seven years, and deal with the fall-out of a secret. 
Warnings: mentions of drinking, panic attack, references to death, child labor 
Word Count: ~4.5k
A/N: I promise I've started on part 11! I appreciate all of your love on this series <3 it seriously means the world to me
series masterlist
Fenrys, sat to your right, was watching you. He was subtle, others wouldn’t notice - perhaps except Rowan or Aelin, but you felt his attention on you, like he knew something was wrong. The bastard probably did. 
The encounter had rattled you. Especially because the male was still sitting further down the table. You’d done a good job of ignoring him for the most part, even though his attention wandered your way several times. Earlier, you’d been correct assuming it was a personal matter, because he didn’t bring up a single thing related to an artifact causing trouble, or your bloodline. Not even a hint of it. 
Yes, his questions had unnerved you, but the memory moreso. You’d kept your oath, but you tried not to think of him. It had been years, but the pain and loss still felt like yesterday, the scar still felt fresh, guilt and horror threatened to overwhelm you - 
A warm hand on your knee, a small squeeze. Fenrys. A scan of the table showed nobody looking closely at you, good - it would’ve been embarrassing and unprofessional if you’d spaced out while a question was asked. 
Trying not to count down the seconds, you did your best to hang on to every word, to listen intently, but your mind scrambled. A glass of wine, maybe a good book, and sleep was desperately needed. 
With Fenrys next to you like a guard dog, he only shot you a look, probably meant to be some kind of promise of a future conversation. You’d need a good amount to avoid him, and lately your luck has been running terrifyingly low. 
Waiting an appropriate amount of time after the meeting concluded - mainly until he left the room, you beelined for the door. A broad back cut you off, Fenrys asking some kind of question you couldn’t hear through the ringing in your ears, the pure panic rising in your lungs. 
Vaguely aware of the empty room surrounding you, Rowan’s face loomed in front of yours, his mouth forming words you couldn’t hear or comprehend. Chest caving, each breath felt like a chore, the sharp pain of your nails in your palm couldn’t distract you, couldn’t break you out, you were suffocating, drowning - one hand squeezed your shoulder, another gripping your chin, tilting it up to meet his gaze. 
“Breathe,” you read his lips, the movement of his mouth slow and exaggerated. “You’re safe.” 
His hand enveloped yours, drawing it up towards his chest. The grip on your chin didn’t move, forcing you to look at him to focus on the steady beat of his heart under your palm, the exaggerated rising and falling of his chest, the way his hand still covered your own. Slowly, the ringing subsided, your breaths growing easier. 
“Good?” He asked, and you hated the gentleness in his voice. You replied with a terse nod. Rowan studied you for a few moments, and unlike yourself you squirmed under the scrutiny, shifting back and forth on your feet. 
“Alright,” he said slowly, releasing your chin, lowering your hand back to your side. He strode back towards the door, jerking his head, speaking lowly enough your Fae hearing couldn’t catch the words. Fenrys strode back in, his face unusually severe. The door shut with a soft snick, a comforting shield of wind surrounding the room. You were too overloaded to add your own magic. 
Fenrys looked concerned, but you shook your head, “I'm fine.” 
“Then what the hell happened before?” At least Fenrys got straight to the point.
“Someone just … asked something that rattled me,” you hedged, leaning back against the table, crossing your arms, trying to buy yourself some time to find a way to explain it that wouldn’t make them overreact. Logically, you knew it was too late for that. 
“You don’t get rattled,” Rowan crossed his arms. Technically, that was a compliment. You glanced at Fenrys, like he might make some kind of joke, but his face was nearly as serious as Rowan’s. Two walls of unrelenting and overbearing male arrogance. “Who?” 
“Does it matter?” 
Neither male bothered responding. Running fingers through your hair, you told him, and added “it wasn’t exactly a threat.” 
‘Exactly’, was your mistake. 
“Tell me everything.” The demand in Rowan’s tone, the sheer sense of authority and arrogance, made you prickle but … this time you gave in and recited the conversation. 
“What do you think he’s looking for?” Fenrys asked before Rowan could get a word.. 
“I don’t know. I don’t want to know.” The second part wasn’t necessarily true. He’d peaked your curiosity, hit that lingering sense of guilt perfectly - as if he already knew how to work you. But, curiosity killed the cat - you wouldn’t make that mistake. 
“We’ll keep an eye on him,” Rowan said, glancing up at the clock. Another meeting would start soon - one should probably be at. “Stay here for the night.” 
“Right where he is?” You raised your brows. 
“Right where we are,” he corrected. 
“I’m not that scared.” 
“So you admit you’re scared?” 
“Oh fuck off,” you snapped at him. 
“We fought with that male,” Rowan snarled, “we’re well aware of what he’s capable of.” 
Of course they had. You caught Fenrys’s nod from the corner of your eye. 
“And I’m more than capable of protecting myself. Find someone else to be a fussy bastard to.”
“I care about your safety,” he gritted his teeth, “is that so wrong?” 
Damn you, something inside of you softened and you hated yourself for it. 
“It’s safer for me to be at home.” 
“Safer for who?” The edge in Rowan’s voice grew, “because I know damn well you’re trying to draw a threat away from the castle.” Away from Ceri was implied. He probably didn’t know it, but you wanted it away from him too. From him, Aelin, Fenrys, all of the people you cared about. You couldn’t argue. 
“Don’t fucking underestimate me.” 
He laughed roughly, “trust me, I’m not.”
“Then don’t try to coddle me,” your left fist clenched. 
“It’s common sense, not coddling.” 
Fenrys’s eyes darted back and forth between the two of you, and you threw your head back in a groan. 
“If anything happens tonight, even if I get a bad feeling, I'll come back here,” you said with enough finality and sincerity that the males very begrudgingly agreed. “I’m going home now,” you sidestepped Fenrys, skirted around Rowan, the shield of wind falling, and strode out of the door. 
-
Rowan hadn’t slept well since you left the night before. You showed face yesterday, probably just to assure him and maybe prove a point, but the Akkadian contingent would be present for two more days. He told Aelin, of course, and had to be the reasonable one to prevent her from doing an interrogation of her own. She’d agreed, already knowing there was a close eye kept on them. But, it was near impossible to keep track of everyone entering or leaving without raising suspicion. 
Quarter to midnight, just when he figured he should try and get some sleep, and kick the rest of the Court out, Halle appeared with a … piece of paper between her teeth. She jumped directly on him, claws digging in, dropping the paper, hissing when he didn’t immediately grab it. He took the hint, and didn’t hesitate before unfolding it. 
I’m going to have company soon. If you and Aelin attend, it’ll raise too many suspicions, and it’s the dead of night. Send Fenrys? I’ll stay in until then. 
Gods, you planned on confronting him. The words were scribbled quickly, letters shaky, ink blotted in a few areas. 
He tossed it to Fenrys, who caught it between two fingers - glancing once curiously at the cat, her keen eyes now fixed on him. Attending. You said nothing about a hawk keeping watch from the sky. Besides, you’d said ‘you and Aelin,’ not ‘you or.’ Aelin would be pissy she needed to stay here, but if they were both absent from the castle …  
Sometimes, Rowan missed when he wasn’t King, when he could confront a problem like this without having to worry about political repercussions, when he lived somewhere there were few laws against murder. 
He flew above Fenrys - taking a back exit from the castle, sticking to secluded areas. Somehow, the giant white wolf went unnoticed. Perhaps because it was a Friday night, and the current areas they ran through were nearly abandoned. 
Regardless, he scouted the way ahead, spotting the two males just a fifteen minute walk from your house now. It was obvious they didn’t know exactly where they were going, but Fenrys should arrive with a few minutes to spare. He knew you’d notice his presence, and he’d avoid showing his face to keep your wrath away. 
He momentarily forgot keeping your wrath away as he watched you slip past the wards and shift. Then - disappeared. Catching a draft, he set out to intercept Fenrys. 
-
You’d lied to them unintentionally, the decision made last minute, a switch, but it was the … choice that felt right, a warm hand on your shoulder - a feminine voice in the back of your ear, guiding you. Slipping past the words, sending silent apologies to the night, you shifted. 
It was easy enough to track their magic, moving in between the folds of time and space. Harder, was deciding the best way to ‘run into’ their path. 
Pinching your cheeks until they flushed red, hands shoved into pockets, head down, senses awake - a slight sway in your step, humming a tune frequently played in Terrasen’s taverns, you turned the corner and let the threads of fate throw you to the wolves. 
“Oh,” you laughed, stumbling back a few steps, brushing hair away from your face, “didn’t think I’d see you again today. Your voice carried over the wind, although you spoke a tad louder than necessary. The location was empty, but not abandoned. Probably not where they would’ve chosen. It felt important that you chose the place. “Convenient, finding you here.” 
“Convenient, indeed,” the predatory gleam in his eyes raised the hair on the back of your neck. Still, stupid male. If he thought beyond whatever agenda he’s set on, he would’ve wondered how you ended up directly in his path. “There’s some things we’d like to discuss-”
“It’s past business hours, I’m afraid,” you yawned.
“We can keep this separate,” he purred and you fought the urge to gag. His friend was stone-faced. They looked similar enough they could be brothers or cousins. 
“What do you want?”
“Like I said,” he cleared his throat. “There’s an artifact causing trouble, we need your skillset to track it down.” 
He said it as if it was a done thing, like you’d agree in an instant. “I’m not the person you’re looking for.” 
“Andal said you were.” 
You paled, all of the color flushing from your skin. He couldn’t see it, in the dark, but the silence probably told him he’d hit the mark. Nothing was telling you to run, nothing pushing you away from this - although you wished it would. Deny, deny, deny, was the safe choice but … you had to get to the bottom of this one way or another. Worst case, you shift and disappear. Hopefully. 
“If Andal said,” you pretended to think about it, just for a moment, tapping your fingers on your thigh, before shaking your head “it doesn’t matter, I’m out of business.” 
“This is urgent,” his friend, stone-man, growled.
“Oh he speaks,” you teased. 
“It’s one of the -” his words froze mid-sentence, a pulse of ancient and near primal magic weaving into the space.
Fenrys nearly bowled you over - stumbling, bracing his hand on your shoulder. “Quit leaving me behind,” he huffed out a laugh. An icy and familiar wind brushed against your cheek. 
Immense relief filled you, although you were seconds away from getting the information you wanted. “My bad,” you shot him a smile. 
Nearly imperceptibly, his fingers tightened around your shoulder as he straightened, examining the two males in front of you. Males he already knew were there. Still, you were impressed by his acting. 
“New friends?” He drawled. You shrugged, but didn’t shake off his hand, and he didn’t move it. 
“They were asking for my advice,” you cleared your throat - after an uncomfortable minute of silence. 
“Advice that cannot wait until tomorrow?” 
There was an underlying threat in his words, a slight change in tone, and with it the air filled with tension - suffocating, like all of their magics rose to the surface, postures tense and ready to snap at any minute. 
“I’m sure it can wait,” the male said roughly, jerking his chin towards his friend, as they both strode down the street - back towards the castle. “I’ll be in touch,” he called over his shoulder. Fenrys stiffened, but you didn’t bother replying. 
You and Fenrys waited until they were out of hearing range, and then a few minutes longer for good measure. At this point, you knew Fenrys well enough to tell when he was furious. 
Clearing the city streets, shadows of the stress covering the two of you, you finally spoke, “I’d almost figured out what -”
A flash of light came from your right, you pivoted, faced with an angry silver-haired male, mouth frozen mid-sentence,  “I’d ask what the hell you were thinking,” he snarled, “but it’s obvious you weren’t.” 
“I was thinking I’d keep those bastards from finding my gods-damned house,” you hissed. 
“How do you know you’re not leading them right back to your gods-damned home?” Fenrys said, his dark eyes flashing.  
Fixing him with a sharp look, you didn’t bother answering. 
One, you’d be able to tell. 
Two, it felt like an insult to your intelligence. 
Three, they weren’t stupid enough to follow if Fenrys was with you. 
You considered telling them to piss off, but knew it would be pointless. Tense, angry silence filled the walk back to your home. 
The wards were heavy, thick magic pulsing, enveloping you the closer you got. It might be uncomfortable to the others, but for you it felt like a hug - like it was singing and welcoming you home, magic reaching out with small threads to tug you into its embrace. You realized that the density of magic might be a beacon, and made a note in your mind to possibly research a way to obscure it. 
Running your finger down the invisible wall, a sliver appeared - just big enough to slip through as, snapping back into place as soon as you passed the threshold. 
The silence carried until you were inside, all sitting stiffly on the various couches and chairs. None of you bothered to appear at ease. 
Rowan’s hand slipped into his pocket, pulling a familiar slip of paper out, holding it between two fingers. Dramatically, he unfolded it and read; 
“I’ll stay in until then,” a breeze floated the page towards you, and you batted it away. A streak of orange, and Halle caught it between her teeth, shaking it in her jaws like a dog. She looked up at you and hissed. A small smile curved on your lips. Reaching a hand out, she rubbed her head along your fingers, lifting her chin for a scratch. A minute passed, and it appeared the two males were waiting for you to break the silence this time. You forced yourself to lean back, the armchair big enough for Halle to jump up and settle next to you, one paw batting at you when you dared to stop petting her.
“Do you ever feel like some kind of God or Goddess is watching over you?” 
“Aelin killed them,” Fenrys deadpanned, Rowan cut a glare at him. That, you didn’t know, but as Rowan’s glare turned on you, you decided it was best to ask that question later. 
“It’s like a warm hand on my shoulder,” you continued, “or a voice, nudging me. It hasn’t failed me before, and today felt like a bad time to test it.”
“You couldn’t have found me?” Fenrys asked, “maybe waited until you weren’t alone to confront them?” 
“I should’ve,” scratching the back of your neck, you avoided his gaze.You were old enough to admit when you’d done something stupid, to realize you had indeed fucked up, even if you hated doing it. “Look,” you let out a slow breath, “this is very … personal.” 
Silence. 
“If I'm going to explain this, Aelin really should be here,” you mumbled. She could easily hear from Rowan, or you could tell the story twice, but you wanted her here. Something about her presence soothed an edge, made dark parts of the past more bearable. 
Rowan stood. “I doubt she’s sleeping,” he said mildly, a glint in his eyes. “I saw you shift earlier, it shouldn’t take long to get there.” 
Fighting the urge to snarl or stomp, you lead the way out the door. “I’ll walk,” you called over your shoulder. Mainly because it would piss his impatient ass off. Based on his snarl, it did. 
Rowan snarled as you took off without him, sending a grin over your shoulder. His eyes rolled, but within a few strides he’d caught up to you. 
“Walking me home?” You teased, “how kind of you.” He gently shoved his shoulder into yours. “Really,” you huffed, “I’ll be fine.” 
“It’ll make me feel better,” he countered, and that was the end of the argument. You’d refused to shift and head back, anyway. You didn’t show your animal form to anyone. Even him. 
“I’ll go with you,” Fenrys quickly caught up to you, walking shoulder to shoulder as the memory faded, “we might run into them again.” 
A flash of light, a shriek from a hawk, and Rowan headed off, likely to warn Aelin. 
Ten minutes into the walk, the silence was getting to your head. 
“What is it?” 
“I’ve never wanted to be back in Doranelle,” Fenrys said quietly, “but there, I could’ve just killed them.” 
“Murder isn’t always the answer,” you snorted, and finally had the courage to look him in the eyes. He was fighting a smile. Throwing your head back, a slightly-incredulous, probably insane sounding laugh bubbled from your chest. 
-
“Some of the objects my ancestors made had uses they didn’t expect, and ended up with the wrong people,” you tapped your fingers against your legs, Aelin tried not to make it obvious she was hanging onto every word. “There’s a sense of … responsibility that comes with it. To destroy them, I suppose. There was never enough time to properly explain it.”
Sounds like bullshit, Aelin thought, but kept listening. 
“Few know how to use Wyrdmarks, and very few have the magic to strengthen or infuse them. Some can catch traces of those objects - track them. Not all of my ancestors were angelic, some tracked them down - either to use themselves or sell to the highest bidder,” disgust filled each word as you spat them out. “I was warned that not all will have bad intentions, but even the best intentions can be skewed by greed,” that phrase came out like a quote, one you’d memorized years ago, stored in the back of your mind - perhaps as a reminder. This was mostly information they’d been able to piece together, and Aelin waited for the other side, for whatever big secret you’d been holding onto. 
“It would be good to know what they're looking for, specifically.” Rowan looked ready to interrupt, but Aelin held up a hand. “Then I'll know their intentions. “I’d almost figured that out earlier,” you shot what was probably supposed to be an annoyed look at Fenrys, but she caught the hint of gratitude. As you turned back to them, a hint of guilt hit her at the exhaustion in your face, at the fear in your eyes. 
“I was nine, stuck on the streets. Someone found me, told me if I helped them out they’d make sure I was taken care of. I worked for them for five years, and did whatever they told me to. I knew I'd get fed, a warm bed, and a few marks here and there - to a kid it felt like riches. My … handler, you could say, had an idea of what my magic could do. Eventually my great uncle found me and dragged me out of it.” You ran a hand over your face. “That’s why they’re asking for help, because they know I’ve done it before.” 
“Andal?” Rowan asked quietly. He must’ve overheard that. All Aelin could think of was that word you used; handler. As the name Andal rolled around in her mind, it sounded eerily like Arobynn. Still, she focused on you - your expression, the paleness of your skin, the mixture of anger and fear flashing at the name, fists clenching slightly, shoulders tensing, feet pressing firmer into the ground - like you were ready to launch into a fight. Aelin understood how a name could trigger such a visceral reaction. 
“I fell for his trap and promises, I was so naive,” 
“You were a child,” Rowan insisted. “It wasn’t your fault.” 
“Part of me always knew it was wrong, but I was so-” your head snapped towards the door, and seconds later a very insistent knock interrupted. Ceri. Rowan’s shield of wind, and one of whatever your magic was, parted and the door flew open. 
Ceri sprinted through the room, launching herself into your arms. 
“You’re here,” she shrieked. Excitement. A smile naturally spread over your face, the tension of the previous conversation put aside as Ceri recounted the past day's events, settling herself next to you on the couch as you watched with rapt attention - cutting in at all of the perfect moments.
It had been a long week and … Aelin realized the two of you didn’t get to spend much time together. She exchanged a glance with Rowan, and they both silently rose, murmuring a good night, before leaving. They’d get up early to talk in the morning. 
-
Ceri spared no detail, and talked until her eyes started closing, yawns interrupting her words. 
“Why don’t you tell me more in the morning?” You asked gently. 
Her lips pursed, like that was the last thing she wanted to do, but she eventually nodded. She stood, her small hand latching onto your wrist, and dragged you both towards your bedroom. It had been years since she insisted on sleeping in your bed, but you didn’t question it. After tonight, you wanted her close. 
The next morning, thank the gods, nobody woke you up at the ass crack of dawn. In fact, a tray of food waited just outside of your door, all of your favorites and Ceri’s. After discerning it wasn’t poison, you brought it in. 
A few cups of tea later and you felt ready to continue last night’s conversation. Partially. None of this way easy to talk about, and you supposed that was a good thing. 
‘As a child,’ Rowan had said. Sure, you’d been young and naive, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that you should’ve known better. ‘Nobody was there to teach you, it’s not your fault,’ a voice that sounded eerily like Aelin’s countered in the back of your mind. 
Ceri left reluctantly, making you promise to spend another night at the castle. It was an easy promise to give, you’d missed her after all. 
As soon as the three of you sat, you said the words you’d rehearsed in your head all morning. “Before we get into … that situation,” you cleared your throat, fighting the tightening sensation. “Whatever it is between us,” you’d caught their attention, both staring at you with keen eyes, “I want it - if you still do. To figure it out when we have time.” 
“I still want it,” Aelin’s mouth curved up at one corner, the mirth in her eyes bringing a pink flush to your cheeks. Rowan met your gaze, pine-green eyes flashing with rare emotion, and nodded. You didn’t need words from him, the look said everything. 
“How dangerous are these objects?” Rowan cleared his throat. Aelin rolled her eyes. 
“Depends on who has them, and if they know what they’re doing.” You realized that was uninformative, and explained, “most of them can capture traces of magic, in some way or form. With enough exposure and time, they can be quite destructive.” 
“You said you helped hunt them, did they ask anything else of you?” 
You nodded, throat constricting, and forced the next words out, “I was a kid who didn’t know what she was doing. I appeased them, changing small marks, making things up, but I really had no idea. I still don’t know what I changed, or what they can do now.” 
“I’ll take care of it.” Aelin said, firmly. 
“It’s not your -” 
“My responsibility, I know,” she waved her hand, “but I want to.” 
The way she said ‘want’ implied she would, whether you liked it or not. You’d learned, over the last few years, that Aelin can be quite good at getting what she wants. Still, you didn’t want to roll over for her. 
“I always pictured myself going on a … quest, some day,” you let out a low, dead, laugh. “When Ceri was grown, hunting down all of the objects I messed with - destroying them.” 
“Getting revenge?” Rowan raised a brow. 
“Redemption,” you countered. He looked like he wanted to argue. “Besides,” you played with the hem of your tunic. “It’s what my uncle would’ve done.” 
“He’s dead, isn’t he?” He said quietly, not with pity, just framing a fact as a question. 
“Yes.” 
Another gods-damned sacrifice. All to keep you alive. All you could do was try to be worthy of it. 
“Ceri didn’t inherit my magic,” you said abruptly.
“I know,” Rowan replied. “Maybe your knack for sensing it, but not the actual magic.” 
“Sensing can be taught,” you replied. 
Aelin hummed. “What do you want to do about this?” 
A few blinks of surprise, but you leaned back. “Honestly? Forget it all happened.” Aelin snorted. “Practically, I should hear them out and figure out what I’m dealing with.” 
“And put yourself in danger?” Aelin’s head tilted, her voice a tad too calm. 
“What if we make it an ‘official’ thing?” When neither outright objected, you continued, “do it during a meeting, make it public.” 
“Then you’ll expose yourself,” Rowan stated. You raised a brow, you already had - to them. “To everyone,” he added. 
“Not necessarily,” you brushed the non-existent dirt off your pants. “I can give them my useless ‘notes’ on the subject,” you’d never intended to give them material that would actually help. “If they try for specifics, clarify what they’re looking for, others will start suspecting them, and I doubt that’s what they want.” 
“How will that tell you what they want?” 
“They’re arrogant and obviously desperate,” you shrugged. “They’ll get irritated, find me, and tell me.” 
“Your plan is to piss them off?” Fenrys looked at you like he prayed you were joking. 
-
taglist: @holb32 @fussel9913 @moonlightttfae @cassianswh0reeee, @reidishh, @shanias-world @fightmedraco @goldenmagnolias @hannzoaks @jennamelinda12 @daughterofthemoons-stuff @acourtofbatboydreams @lennyhhh @prrius-tylersapphire @aelinrhys @theworthlessqueen @anxious-study
143 notes · View notes
bubbles-for-all-of-us · 10 months
Note
Are you requests open yet, right?
Can you make something with Fenrys, like, him and reader are mates, and they are trying to get a child for so long, and one day they discover that they are expecting.
(I really liked your writing, and very few people write about him, so I wanted to thank you for this 💕)
Had a blast writing this truly. Thank you for requesting and the kind words, I hope you'll enjoy it. 🤍✨
Little pup
At first, you didn't talk about it. You both were still young and for the most part, had wanted to explore the world together. Just you two. Try new things. See new places. Travel. Indulge in each other's company. And the mating frenzy hit you so hard that you didn't leave your house for over a month. And by then you were convinced that everyone passing by could smell the sex lingering all around.
And yet even in that month, it wasn't about getting pregnant. Fenrys was learning how to please you and you were doing the same. It was the desire to explore that drove you. To bring each other immense pleasure. Till the last breaking point. Till the moment all you could see was stars. Till furniture was breaking. But the thought of conceiving never crossed your mind.
But it's the first time your period is late and you're feeling so weird that Aelin had to drag you to the healer's level. It's the joyful smile on the woman's face when she says, "Oh you might as well be pregnant", that breaks this bubble of cold water over your head. "How exciting would that be? Babies are so rare and to have one ahh...", the healer beams as she ushers you to lay down. You reach for Aelin's hand almost instantly. The nerve suddenly so uneasy in your chest.
And then the healer's face drops and so does your heart. Sadness washes over you and it's like you had lost something you didn't even think you wanted five minutes ago. "You started your circle, darling", she says lowering your skirt down and you just want to crawl into yourself. "Ah, yes", you quickly move to get down the table. Glad your back is to the two women as you quickly wipe your tears. Suddenly feeling so frustrated. You feel Fenrys tugging on the bond yet that only makes your heart ache more so you push him out of your head quickly. Drowsing the bond in complete darkness.
Fenrys comes home way earlier than he should have been there. And you know it's because he would always drop anything for you. High stake leaders waiting for the meeting? Fuck them! His mate needs him so he's leaving and gods save the souls who try to stand in his way.
He knows by the silence that something had happened. Something that upset you. Ticked you over. Then Fenrys smells the blood. Gears turning before he realizes that your cycle had finally shown up but why the sense of sorrow then? This feeling of pain makes him rub his chest as he too tries to soothe the aching.
"My, love", Fenrys shrugs his cloak off carelessly, stepping closer to the bed. You're completely submerged by the furs all over your body. He makes a quick work of pushing them to the side until your wet cheeks come into sight and Fenry's heart drop even more. "Love", he breathes out in worry. But that only makes your tears well up more. A choked-out sob leaves your lips before you move to push away from your mate. That jabs Fenry's heart too.
"Love, if you don't tell me what's going on...", and then this shien of anger washes over you. Painting your cheeks in even more crimson shades. "Talk to you? Talk about what, huh?", you leap at him, fist coming in contact with Fenrys's strong chest.
But then you draw your hands back, looking at them with so much disgust. Fenrys steps in quickly taking your smaller palms into his. Your mind was too chaotic for him to read now. So he had to trust you to let him in on your own time. "What is going on...", you mutter, "You're overwhelmed and your body is full of hormones", even Fenrys frown at his own words but that's the truth in a way. The question still stands though. What caused all of this? "I thought I was...", you breathe through the sobs, "Thought we had...", and then it's full-on sobs, till your legs give out and Fenrys quickly wraps you up in his arms, rocking you from time to time.
There's no way to tell how long you've been crying by the time you're only sniffling. Eyes puffy and red, holding onto Fenrys for dear life. And he had run out of comforting words by then, opting for silence and love that he poured through the bond. You push away from him slightly. Knowing full well that you owe him an explanation. Because he too would have been a part of this if you had been pregnant. Your eyes well up with tears once more as you glance at him and Fenrys is ready to cradle you once more but you stop him. "I saw a healer this morning. She thought that I might...", you swallow the lump in your throat, shoulders sagging, "might be... pregnant". Fenrys's heart jumps up his throat. Suddenly he's almost hyper-aware of his surroundings. Threats. Smells. Sounds. But then nothing. And then just like before it all falls into place.
This. All of this was because you weren't. Because there wasn't a babe growing in your womb. No little Fenrys, or Y/N. And it's almost like another slap to his face because he only now realizes that you never really talked about it. Becoming parents. Growing your family. Being together and having one another was comforting enough. But seeing you like this. "I'm sorry...", you whisper and Fenrys draws his gaze back to you. "What for love? There's nothing to be sorry for", he brushes your loose hair away from your face.
"For not being pregnant", Fenrys frown at your words. And frowns so deep that his eyebrows nearly come together. "Now you take that back", his hands cup your face, "You take that back and never dare to apologize for something like this".
And you know that it comes from his heart because he loves you. Because no matter what you do he will always be there. "What if I can't?", you ask him, biting your lip, "Then we won't have any and that will be more than enough because we would have one another", he's quick to reassure you. And once more from the way his eyes are gleaming you know that he means it. "Come here", he mutters m, bringing you back into his arms, and wrapping it up in the comfort of his warmth. Drowning out the world around you.
All of this leads to a long conversation about children. One that you share late at night, both tangled between the sheets. Let the stars and the moon be the only witnesses of your wishes and dreams. And you both know that's so rare. And something that many couples don't even get close to. Fenrys knows how he and his brother Connall had come pretty late into their parent's lives. But then what a blessing it was to have two babies. Yet the time span was what scared him the most. Not because he was desperate. Don't get him wrong he wanted to see you pregnant. Know that it's his baby growing within you. But he could tell how fragile this topic made you. How you would shiver any time someone brought up the conversation of babies. How you would halt at the sight of younglings running around in the streets. How you forced a smile once Ellide got pregnant and you had brushed away your sad tears saying that it was only happy crying.
And it's only a handful of years later. Many disappointing visits to the healers later that you jolt up in the morning rushing to the bathroom. Fenrys is out of bed just as fast, darting after you and reaching to hold your hair out of your face as you emptied your stomach into the toilet. His hands rub comforting circles over your back. Your skin looks clammy and pale and it makes Fenrys sick to his stomach as well.
Because what if all the sorrows had finally eaten you from within in? What if he had missed something? Overlooked you not eating well, not sleeping enough. Your head drops to the side, and Fenrys quickly turns you over, reaching for the tap before flickering water over your face. If an illness claimed your life... if he would be left alone...it's a selfish thought but one that has been his number one fear ever since he saw you for the very first time.
"I'm fine", you groggily say and Fenrys only huffs, "Fine my ass, you're barely conscious". Those are harsher words than he wishes that thrown your way but he's so worried. So worried his own eyes are blurry. Then he moves up quickly, you tightly pressed to his chest. "Fen, I just need to lay down", but he doesn't listen as he throws the door open. Not caring that he's shirtless, or that you are only wearing one of his shirts. He rushes down the hallway, yet he's still mindful of not shaking you too much.
The healers haven't even finished their morning preparations when he storms in, eyes wild. The healer who had been tending to you for years now jumps up instantly. "I don't know what's happening", Fenrys admits as he lowers you onto the bed. The lady presses her palm onto your forehead before cradling your cheek. "Y/N, what's hurting?", she asks softly but you only shake your head. Her mouth falls into a tight frown and she orders a couple of other healers around, turning to Fenrys so he would tell her what happened.
"When was the last time you ate, girl?", she asks strictly, fingers running over your stomach. "Breakfast", you breathe out, "yesterday". Fenrys growls in frustration. He had returned home late last night, you had already been asleep and so he never even thought about the fact that he didn't ask anyone on his way up if you had been down to eat dinner. The healer shakes her head, "Silly, silly girl. Mirth, bring the lady some light breakfast and a tart", she says even though you turn to protest. "You're with child and this is all stunt you pulled here is because you didn't eat", every sound in the room dies down. Your eyes grow big and for a moment you're sure you just mistaken her words. Surely not... but it's the way Fenrys is looking at the healer with the same surprised eyes that makes you realize that he heard it too.
"Congratulations you two. A strong heartbeat", she carefully presses her palm to your shoulder. Knowing full well that once the information fully settled in Fenrys's brain anyone that would get near the slight swell in your lower stomach would be marked an enemy. The wolf closes the distance between you two. He doesn't yet trust his words so he just leans in pressing his forehead to yours. And now that it's been brought up you do smell slightly different. And the heartbeat. How did he miss the heartbeat? What kind of father will he be if he missed his child growing inside you?
"The best kind", you mutter, "the best kind of father", your hand cups his cheek, and the white wolf instantly nuzzles closer to you. He kisses the side of your head, brushing the tears from your cheeks. "Our baby", he mumbles, pressing his palm to your stomach, "Our little pup", you put your hand over his. And then Fenrys breaks into fits of giggles as he brings you closer into his arms. You too can't help the smile even if the dizziness still lingers. And you suddenly feel complete as if this was all that was missing. Now the picture would be complete. "A father, my beautiful mate will make me a father", he beams, brushing his lips against yours in a messy kiss, but the door swings open as the younger healer walks in with a trey. The laughter stops and Fenrys is snarling at the door, teeth out. Your hands push against his chest softly, "Darling, she means no harm", you reassure him yet his eyes don't leave the poor girl now shaking by the door. "Thought you seen him protective, girl? Welcome to the next stage", the older healer chuckles as she hands you the sweet bun.
386 notes · View notes
shadowdaddies · 5 months
Note
can i request something with elorcan x reader. Maybe elide and lorcan are mated and they start to feel guilty about liking reader and don’t tell each other. And one day they’re jealous when someone flirts with reader and they look at each other and are like
“ i know why im jealous, why are you?🤨” and they just confess to each other and both realize that the mating bond includes reader so they tell her and they get together
We Have Now
Poly!Elorcan x f!Reader
Tumblr media
Leaning against the doorframe, Elide watched as you sparred with Lorcan, a triumphant smile gracing your features as the tip of your wooden practice sword pinned his chest. “Ah the mighty warrior, why does it seem you’re so distracted during our training sessions lately?” you teased.
Lorcan’s cheeks tinged red, the brawny male clearing his throat as his eyes flicked to where Elide stood watching. You turned, eyes lighting up as you caught sight of the stunning female. “Hi lovely!” you called, summoning Elide over as you wrapped her in a sweaty hug. “Thank you for the training as always, Lorcan. I’ll let you two lovebirds be alone,” you said, winking as you took Lorcan’s practice sword to stow alongside your own. 
You felt their eyes on your back as your boots scuffed the stone floors, sending a nervous smile over your shoulder as you worried you might be intruding. Lorcan glanced nervously at Elide, her black eyes tracking the sway of your hips as she bit her lip. “You don’t need to rush off,” she called, her gaze flicking to Lorcan, whose eyes were now once more locked on you. “You can join us for tea before dinner tonight, if you like.” 
You whirled around, heart pounding at the invitation to spend more time with them. You knew it was wrong to feel the way you did about a mated couple, but there was an irresistible pull drawing you to them - as if you could breathe easier, colors brighter, air fresher when they were around. You managed to shake your head, a pleasant smile on your lips as you promised to see them tonight at dinner, completely unaware that the both of them felt that same pull towards you.
Elide and Lorcan looked at each other after you left, silence hanging thick in the air between them. With a shaky exhale, Elide broke the tension first, once more evading admitting their feelings for you. They went for tea, enjoying each others’ company as though it were a half of a meal - wonderful as it was, not entirely fulfilling. 
You donned a special dress for the evening, knowing that several of your friends were visiting Perranth from Orynth, and would be at dinner tonight. Satisfied with your appearance, you made your way to the dining room where Aelin, Rowan, and Fenrys were already waiting. 
With an excited yelp, you ran to give Aelin a hug, following up by greeting Rowan and Fenrys. Elide and Lorcan entered the room just as you were speaking with Fenrys, angered expressions on their faces confusing you. You took the seat next to Fenrys, balking at Elide’s intense stare as you did so. 
As dinner progressed, the tension in the room grew, Elide and Lorcan seemingly upset over something that you couldn’t determine. Lorcan’s eyes remained fixed on your end of the table, bouncing between you and Fenrys. You gave him a concerned look, noticing the white knuckle grip the male held on his fork, and Lorcan exhaled, giving you an apologetic smile. He wrapped his arm around Elide, the pair seeming to cool down until Fenrys put an arm on your shoulder, leaning across to take a bite of dessert from your plate.
Elide jumped from her chair, practically hissing as Lorcan snapped his metal fork in half. Rowan and Aelin halted, warily checking for visible threats before understanding crossed their faces. Snickering, Aelin pulled Fenrys away by the arm, your friend stealing the rest of your cake as the trio stood. “We’ll leave you three to talk,” Rowan murmured, his deep voice carrying across the room as he exited with Aelin and Fenrys.
You reared back, wide-eyed as you gaped at Elide, who was still standing over you with flushed cheeks. “What is going on with you two?” you whisper-shouted, knowing Aelin and Rowan were likely listening with their ears pressed to the door. Busybodies. 
Lorcan gently pulled Elide to sit back down, the couple sharing a nervous glance as realization struck them. Elide turned towards you slowly. “We were...”
“Jealous,” Lorcan finished, Elide reaching over to squeeze his hand in affirmation. You gawked at them, at a loss for words as your mind scrambled to catch up. 
“Why would you be jealous?” you breathed, swallowing thickly as your heart raced, hope coursing through your chest.
They looked at each other, a silent understanding passing between the two of them before Elide reached for your hand across the table. The moment her hand connected with yours, you felt the snap in your chest, feeling a wholeness that you didn’t know was possible before. Lorcan smiled, letting out a rough laugh as he reached his hand as well. “You’re our mate.”
You nodded, a weight lifted off your shoulders as understanding finally filled you. You started, “I’ve always felt drawn to you both, and I felt horrible for it-“ 
Elide shook her head, pressing a kiss to your hand. “I felt the same. I think we always knew there was something more, but I was scared of what it meant. I wish we had talked about this sooner.” 
You smiled, leaning forward to press a kiss to Elide’s cheek, then Lorcan’s. “We have now.”
“Finally! Can we come back in?” Aelin shouted through the door. Lorcan scowled, but you and Elide laughed as she shouted back a “yes.”
Aelin ran in, heading straight for the cake she’d left on the table. “Fenrys, you might need to sit at the opposite end,” she joked, earning a warning snarl from Lorcan that had you giggling, eyes alight with a new joy at finding your mates.
Tumblr media
106 notes · View notes
danikamariewrites · 9 months
Note
Could you do a fenrys x reader smut, or maybe a fenrys x reader x rowan smut pretty please (i would absolutely die😩)
Learning (SMUT)
Fenrys x f!reader x Rowan
A/n: I now need both of them irl 😩 I’m so sorry this took a while I wanted to make sure it was good. I hope you enjoy!
Warnings: smut, threesome, dom/sub dynamics (i think)
As Fenrys carried you to his room you’d both giggle as you whispered your desires to each other, leaving occasional pecks on one another’s heated skin. He pauses outside his door resting you against the cool wood. Fenrys attaches his lips to your neck, nipping at the soft flesh, dragging his tongue to soothe the marks. You let out a soft moan, holding on to him tighter.
You heard heavy footsteps as Rowan came around the corner. You had heard about his talents in the bedroom. You had hoped Fenrys would have the skills or at least be on parr with the Prince. Not that Fenrys was bad in bed. He was good, really good. Just a little too eager at times.
Rowan was trying to ignore you but he caught you eyeing him. The scent of your arousal drawing him closer, his pupils blown wide. Fenrys stops his attack on your neck looking at Rowan. Fenrys winks at the white haired male, giving him a devious smirk. “You look tense brother, care to join us?”
Your eyes go wide. You were about to have both males! Fenrys looks up at you, “If that’s ok with you baby.” You nod lightly. Rowan grabs your face in his hand, “Use your words, baby.” “Yes.” It comes out mumbled due to your squeezed cheeks.
“Good girl.” Rowan purrs. Fenrys opens the door, making his way to drop you on the bed. He goes to rip your dress off like he usually would, but Rowan grabs his wrist, tutting at him. “I thought I taught you better than that pup.” Fenrys eyes him questioningly. “Slower. Must I teach you everything?”
He pushes Fenrys to sit next to you. Rowan climbs on top of you, slowly undoing the ties of your dress while staring into your eyes. He smirked as your breath caught in your throat. Peeling the dress from your hot skin Rowan lets out a hum of approval.
After he discards the dress, his fingers dance over your breasts down to your thighs, pulling your panties off. Fenrys groans, pulling you by your jaw to look at him, connecting his lips with yours. You break away from him, gasping for air. “Both of you, clothes off.” Both males move to undress quickly.
Gods they’re beautiful. So perfectly sculpted. Even their scars suit them. Rowan’s tattoo is your favorite, you love the way it runs down his face to his fingers. Those thick, perfect fingers. You bite your lip as you go to move up the bed. Rowan grabs your ankles, pulling you to the edge of the bed so your ass is hanging off.
He rests your legs on his shoulders squeezing at your thighs. Fenrys holds you up so your back rests against his strong chest. His tan hands cupping your breasts, rubbing circles on your nipples with his thumbs. You whimper at their sensual touches. As you move against him you feel his hard cock rub against your back.
Rowan licks a stripe up your pussy. He smirks against you and continues to lap at your entrance. You arch against Fenrys who’s still playing with your nipples. Rowan starts to suck at your clit. You moan as you feel your orgasm approaching. You grind against his face and feel him smirk again.
Pulling away from you, Rowan rips Fenrys’ hands from your breasts. You mewl at the loss of them. You look up at Fenrys with big pleading eyes, reaching to grab the back of his head. Fenrys leans down to kiss you, but Rowan grabs him by the hair to stop him. “Uh-uh. Good girls don’t whine. They take what they get.”
Fenrys looks down at you, “You’re our good girl, yeah?” “Yes.” You pant. Rowan growls. “Yes what?” Fenrys drawls teasingly. “Yes sir.” Rowan lets out a dark laugh. “Good pup. You are learning.” He leans down and runs his canines up the side of his neck. Rowan bites on his pulse point, sucking on the skin. Fenrys’ eyes flutter as he leans back, giving Rowan better access to his neck.
You feel yourself grow wetter at the sight above you. Rowan pulls back, his attention going to you. “Ready to use that pretty mouth of yours?” “Yes sir.” You look down at his long length. You don’t know if you’ll be able to take all of him. But you were drooling for him. Rowan pulls you into a bruising kiss as Fenrys adjusts himself behind you.
Fenrys lays down resting his head between your legs. He leaves kisses up your thighs all the way up to your center. You moan against Rowan’s mouth and he pulls away. “Sit.” He commands. Fenrys pulls you down by your thighs to be fully seated on his face.
As soon as his lips connect with your pussy Fenrys starts to eat you out like a man starved. His tongue exploring you like he never had before. You assumed Rowan’s presence was to thank for that. Your head lolls backwards, your mouth falls open in a silent scream.
Reaching out, you lay your hands on Rowan’s sculpted chest. You trace the tattoos up to his shoulder. With his tattooed hand he collects your hair in a makeshift ponytail and guides you towards his cock. He strokes himself a few times, spreading the precum that was beading at his tip.
You wrap your hand around the base of him, leaving long, slow licks on his tip. He lets out a small moan, forcing you down on him. You gagged as you tried to relax your throat. As you take more of him you moan at Fenrys’ tongue flicking your clit. Rowan pulls you up as his way of telling you to start sucking.
Bobbing your head up and down on him Rowan moans, praises falling from his lips, “So fucking good. Just like that, good girl.” You grind down on Fenrys’ face at his words. You move faster on Rowan’s cock as you feel your orgasm approaching again.
You ride Fenrys faster until you come on his lips. He pauses for a moment and then goes back to licking at your release. “Fuck, you’re going to swallow all of me. Can you do that baby?” You nod as best you can. Moments later Rowan’s spilling down your throat with a moan.
He pulls you off of him and lays you down. Fenrys crawls over you caressing your face. “Good girl baby you took him so well.” You give him a small smile as your breathing evens out. “Do you think you can take both of us, or do you need a break?” You shake your head against the pillow then quickly remember to give a verbal confirmation. “No! I need both of you please.”
Fenrys scoops you up so your leaning against his chest. Rowan positions himself behind you, resting a hand on your hip. You wrap your arms around Fenrys’ neck as he teases your entrance with his cock. He kisses your forehead murmuring sweet nothings about how perfect and beautiful you are.
He slowly slides into you and then starts to set a quick pace. “Fuck Fenrys, feels so good.” You cry. Your so sensitive from your previous orgasm and Rowan’s teasing you can feel every vein of Fenrys’ long cock rubbing against your walls. You didn’t know how long you’d be able to last.
Rowan slips his fingers under you, collecting your slick. He starts to tease your hole before positioning himself to enter you. Rowan pushes into you and you scream out in pleasure. He quickly begins to move at the same pace as Fenrys you feel your orgasm building for the third time tonight.
You moan out curses and praises at the two of them. The feeling of them moving together inside you was other worldly. Digging your nails into Fenrys’ shoulders you scream, “I-I’m going to come!” Rowan growls and his pants get louder as he quickens his pace, his hips slapping your ass. “Go ahead baby, show us what a good girl you are and come for us.” Fenrys says, speeding up to match Rowan.
You come hard around Fenrys and he keeps fucking you. Rowan comes next, resting his head on your shoulder as he stills his hips. After a few more thrusts Fenrys coats your walls with his come, slowing down as his cock twitches inside of you.
The three of your are covered in sweat and panting. Both males pull out of you and Rowan lays you down, rubbing soothing circles on your thighs.
Fenrys nudges your legs open and you whimper, not able to take anymore stimulation. He shushes you, “I’m just cleaning you up baby, it’s ok.” You nod, unable to speak from how tired you were. Rowan brushes your hair out of your face. “You did such a good job baby.” He coos at you, laying next to you.
Once Fenrys is done wiping between your legs he comes to lay on your other side. You snuggle into his side, pulling Rowan’s arm over you. You quickly drift off to sleep with the two holding you in their arms. The only thought on your mind is that this needs to happen again.
267 notes · View notes
lorcandidlucienwill · 5 months
Text
Lorcan and Elide's relationship: A summary
Lorcan: jeez that bitch smells funny she must be a monster in disguise *decides to follow her for days* Elide: Dude I'm just trying to get to my queen I'm a normal human being leave me alone pls. *ilken show up* Lorcan: Oh dear what's the point of stalking her if she dies now? Let me kill those ilken for you. Run girl. Elide: *runs* Lorcan: Damn this bitch slow af. *ilken split up and catch Lorcan and Elide separately* Lorcan: *kills ilken* Elide: *tricks ilken* Lorcan: Jeez wtf she survived? Smartass. She must be a monster. Elide: I'm literally not. I'm escaping Morath Lorcan: Whatever, let's go. *scoops Elide up like a sack of potatoes and runs* *once they're safe* Lorcan: Yooooo you came from Morath? I'll protect you and in exchange you tell me everything about the place. Elide: Deal. Later on... Elide: So let's sneak into that tavern in disguise. Follow my lead. Lorcan: ...fine *overhear a carnival group discussing how to get across the plains* Elide: So you're my husband now. Lorcan: Are you crazy, woman? Do I look like a male who can be tied down? Elide: To me, yes. Lorcan: ...Yes ma'am. Elide: Hey circus babes! Do you have any availabilities? My husband here is an expert sword-thrower and I'm an oracle. Circus troupe: What a coincidence! A sword-thrower is exactly what we need! Lorcan: 👁️👄👁️ later on... Elide: Actually fuck you I don't want to tell you shit. Lorcan: ... *washes her clothes, draws her a bath, brings her dinner* Elide: My uncle locked me in the dungeon in Morath and abused me in Perranth long before. Lorcan: *cracks knuckles* Somebody has a death wish *repeatedly saves Elide from ilken* Lorcan: Not my wife you dicks! Later on... Elide: *picks up his axe and starts wielding it like a badass* Lorcan: 😍 Later on... Lorcan: *shields Elide from the might of Aelin, Dorian, and Rowan's magic* Elide: Damn, my queen and her court are terrifying. Lorcan is just my smol teddy bear. Lorcan: I aM nOt I aM lItTeRaLlY dEaTh HiMsElF- *proceeds to put a tiny shield over Elide to keep ash from clumping in her hair* Elide: Uh huh. *Gavriel and Fenrys try to kill Lorcan and Elide jumps in between* Lorcan: I'm going to kill BOTH of you assholes. Gavriel: Let me heal the girl at least. Lorcan: ...fine. Elide: NO- Lorcan: I wanted to go to Perranth with you. *random army approaches them* Lorcan: DUDE WTF WE JUST ESCAPED 500 ILKEN I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS SHIT *tries to help Elide escape* *turns out Aelin had called for that army but she was too stupid to tell anybody and it was too late because Lorcan had instinctively called for his queen* Elide: I choose you, Lorcan. *Aelin gets kidnapped by Lorcan's queen* Elide: ...nvm *proceeds to destroy Lorcan's will to live over the next few months* Lorcan: I'M SORRY ELIDE! I SWEAR! Elide: Actually die, monster. Lorcan: *about to die* Elide: ExCuse me, he's MY emotional support monster. *proceeds to save him in a legendary scene* Lorcan: I LOVE YOU ELIDE! Elide: *quietly* I love you too. Lorcan: WHAT WAS THAT? Elide: I SAID I LOVE YOU LORCAN SALVATERRE *fade to black sex* Later on... Lorcan: Ask me to marry you. Elide: Will you marry me? Lorcan: I'll think about it. Elide: *doubles over laughing* Lorcan: What? Elide: Is it truly worth it to become Lord Lorcan Lochan? Lorcan: I will marry you, Elide Lochan. And proudly call myself Lord Lorcan Lochan, even when the whole kingdom laughs to hear it. And when we are wed, I will bind my life to yours, so we will never know a day apart. Never be alone, ever again.
115 notes · View notes
jazzmckay · 5 months
Text
soft little fenders ficlet because the mood struck <3
*
Anders has been growing his hair out. It hangs past his shoulders now; sometimes he ties it back, other times he leaves it free, lets it fall where it may, not minding when the wind swirls it into tangles. On such occasions, Fenris finds himself running his fingers through it, gauntlet removed and touch gentle, easing the knots loose. Anders' hair is soft, and running his fingers through it feels nice.
From the smile Anders always gives him after, it feels nice to him too, so Fenris keeps doing it, even if he is unused to--and therefore unsure about--giving such simple affections.
It's warm enough on the northern border between the Free Marches and Antiva that Anders ties his hair up in a messy bun more often than not when he goes to work in the tiny garden they've started behind the cabin they're currently inhabiting. It's a nice cabin, and easily defensible, too--they may stay here longer than they've stayed anywhere else.
While Anders tends to the plants, Fenris fills a wash basin and cleans the pile of laundry that has gathered over the past week. His attention is divided, half on his soapy hands, half on Anders. Some strands of his hair fall loose from the tie. If one gets in his face, he blows and shakes it away, still intent on his work. His hands move with practised motions, firm and precise.
By the time Fenris is pinning up their clothes to dry, Anders is finished. He takes the washing basin with him when he goes inside, off to wash up himself.
Fenris follows once he's done his task, and finds Anders sitting on the end of the bed they share, his hands clean and working a brush through his untied hair.
The sight of him makes Fenris still just to take him in, even though he's been treated to the sight of Anders relaxed, in loose, plain clothes, and with the lines of his face smoothed out, many times now. Almost every day, as Kirkwall fades into the past, relinquishing its hold.
Fenris finally steps over to him, and Anders lifts his face to meet his gaze. "Beautiful mage," Fenris murmurs as he cups Anders' cheek and leans down to kiss him.
Anders' fingers clutch the back of Fenris' tunic as he returns the kiss, holding onto him. He always does something of the sort when Fenris initiates, like he needs him closer, needs him to linger as long as possible.
Fenris draws his fingers through Anders' combed hair, both enjoying the sensation and as a gesture of reassurance. When they part from the kiss, Fenris takes the brush from Anders' hand and settles on the mattress with him, picking up from where he interrupted Anders' brushing.
As he passes the brush through Anders' hair, Anders goes boneless, shoulders completely loose and head tipped forward. Fenris can't resist sweeping his hair aside to kiss his nape, which earns him a soft sound of approval.
The last of the tangles are smoothed out easily, then Fenris sets the brush aside on the patchy blanket, bringing both hands up to gather Anders' hair within them. The tie is around Anders' wrist; he would hand it over, if Fenris offered to put his hair back up, but that hadn't crossed Fenris' mind, initially. He only wants to touch, and wants to soothe.
Still, an unexpected inclination comes over him as he's running his fingers through. He parts Anders' hair into a few narrow strands, beginning to weave them in a way that starts forming a braid, even though Fenris has never learned how. At least, he has no recollection of learning how, but muscle memory takes over, and soon Anders' hair is pulled into an intricate braid that starts wide and tapers to a tiny point.
"I didn't know you could do this," Anders says as he raises a hand and brushes his fingers blindly over the braid, feeling the weave of it.
"Neither did I," Fenris admits. "Maybe... I did this for Varania, or our mother. A long time ago."
Anders turns enough to look at him, taking his hand in a comforting hold.
Thinking of his family doesn't sting as much as it did after Varania's betrayal. Fenris is almost at peace with it, almost able to accept a past he doesn't remember but was still important to him, once upon a time. Regardless, Anders is his family now, and the others too, even if they've mostly gone separate ways. Anders is the one here with him, holding his hand and looking at him with love in his eyes.
"I like it," Anders says. "Will you do it for me again?"
Fenris nods. "Whenever you like."
Anders smiles and shifts closer, leaning in to rest against Fenris' chest. Fenris wraps his arm around his shoulders, pulling him even closer, as eager as Anders always is for there to be no space left between them.
56 notes · View notes
haverdoodles · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
Golden Sun
— (Hawke)
.
Hawke,
This is a letter that you’ll never read.
Maker’s breath, even just writing your name makes me feel like I’ve been stabbed. You’d think I’d be better equipped to deal with grief, considering the hundreds of tragic tales I’ve witnessed and written – and yet somehow, despite the endless knowledge I’ve gained on the subject, I still feel just as lost and helpless as anyone else.
It’s been eleven months since you’ve disappeared. Every waking thought I have is of you trapped in the Fade, lost and searching where I can’t find you
They say grief gets easier with time. I used to tell people the same thing, but I can now safely say it’s bullshit. Eleven months, and there’s still a Hawke-shaped wound in my chest. Some days it’s an unbearable, crushing weight, and Doe-Eyes has to coax me out of bed or else I’ll never leave. A part of me never wants that wound to heal, because it feels like it’d mean forgetting you. I’ll never forget you.
Hawke, you’re unlike anyone I’ve ever met. I’m sure I’ve told you this before, but I don’t think you’ll ever truly grasp just how miraculous you are. How deeply and profoundly good you are, inside and out. You have this innate sort of light that draws people in like moths to flame, but the light never burns people. It shelters and warms, and provides solace to all who need it. They’re calling you the ‘Golden Sun of Kirkwall’, now. I think it’s fitting. I just wish they had decided on a damn name at a time when you could hear it for yourself. Oh, you’d be grinning for weeks.
There are so many things I want to say to you, that I’ve always wanted to say to you, but I can never find the words. The irony. I want to describe the way the sunlight catches your hair and turns it into a halo of golden fire, and the way your smile drowns out every terrible thing in this blighted world. There’s more – something about the specific hue of your eyes, and the ripple of muscle in your arms whenever you stretch or reach or lift up your sword, but the words are fizzling out as I write. I’m so tired, Hawke. I don’t want to write about you, I want you home.
Fenris and I haven’t given up on you. He has a kid now, did you know that? A sweet Qunari girl named Alba. You’d love her. The others have started to believe that you might be dead, but we know better, and we’re working to get you back. The Inquisitor has generously offered all of the resources she has at her disposal. I think she misses you too, though she’d never say it out loud.
I won’t write the three words hovering on the tip of my tongue. They’re too precious to put onto paper, but I feel them strongly just the same.
We’ll find you, Hawke. And when we do, I’ll toss this letter in the flames and never look back. Hold on, just for a little longer.
Varric
.
.
[Doe-Eyes (Te’lise) and Alba are original characters of mine.]
168 notes · View notes
nikethestatue · 1 year
Text
The Date
Happy birthday to my sweet bestie @fawnandshadows
I wish you all the very best for your next quarter century. Have a wonderful day and an amazing year ahead.
Preface:
This is a bonus chapter for The Kings' Wife. I've had the idea of a Ruhn and Elain date for a long time, but did not want to include it in the story. It contains some interesting background about Ruhn, but otherwise, it's just indulgent fluff and smut.
Warning: Explicit language and explicit smut (anal sex)
Tumblr media
Fenrys Moonbeam was right. 
Was it embarrassing? Perhaps. But Ruhn Danaan King was never one to follow prescribed rules. He was never ‘normal’ and wasn’t one to hit all of life’s milestones when he was supposed to have. 
He started walking at 10 months, talking before he was two, reading when he was barely five. Early. He was early in everything. He didn’t remember when he began drawing, maybe he was still in the womb, when he began seeing images and colours. He skipped grades, because he was too smart, but then he was held back, because of his behavioural issues. 
He kissed a girl when he was six. His girlfriend, Millie Kalinowski. Well, technically, he had two girlfriends when he was six–Millie and Aurora Esposito. An overachiever even then. It was Millie’s birthday: he stole her cupcake, she called him a ‘butthole’ and then he smacked a big juicy one on her cheek. She hit him and ran away, crying. 
That was his first foray into romance.
He didn’t kiss anyone else until he was almost fifteen. 
He remembered the kiss, because that was also the day when he killed someone for the first time. Not a crime of passion, or uncontrolled rage of a teenager. He, and his brother Azriel, found and tracked the people who had kidnapped Azriel years before, beat him, tortured him, and attempted to rape him. Azriel broke his wrist in order to escape, and succeeded, but he never forgot. The two of them spent years trying to locate the men who held Az prisoner in an abandoned farm in upstate New York. It was an intricate and thorough investigation–the first time they worked so closely together on a task that consumed them. Along the way, they built a network of informants, spies, made connections, found hackers among gamers, and guys who were really, really good with money, and breaking into banks and accounts, or discovering hidden assets and identities. It helped that neither he, nor Azriel, looked like they were fourteen. They were big, brawny and muscular, their balls dropping early and testosterone flooding their growing bodies and making them strong, agile and by then, already six feet tall. They had money, they could pay, and when someone talked back, they had other ways of convincing people to do what they needed. 
Ruhn remembered his first kill pretty well–a guy named Bobby, a scrawny, but wiry Irishman, who moved fast, and was an ace with a knife. Ruhn’s first kill wasn’t elegant or cerebral. He beat Bobby to death with a baseball bat. The shower of warm, salty blood is what he remembered the most from that evening. Az slitting another guy’s throat, his grip on the blade so strong, that he almost decapitated him. Together, they killed two more that night–but they were no longer counted as the ‘first kills’. 
The murders gave him a high like he’d never felt before and his skin itched from the adrenalin and the memories. He thought that he wouldn’t mind doing that again. He was so jacked up that he wandered the streets until it was late, unable to settle down, unwilling to go home, replaying the murders in his mind. It was awesome! At last, grateful that he had his fake ID in his pocket, he stopped at some dive bar. He wasn’t much of a drinker, and hardly knew how to order a drink properly, but he recalled his father’s bar and the bottles of Jameson’s whiskey on the glass shelves, and figured that he’d order that. He thought that he did it like a pro, but the bartender gave him an assessing look, which told him that he wasn’t fooling anyone. But Ruhn was big and bad, and already sported a tattoo sleeve, and no one in their right mind would want to mess with him over a shot of whiskey. 
When he went to take a piss, he was accosted by a girl. A working girl? Maybe. He never found out. A little buzzed from the drinks and the kills, he liked the feeling of her hands on his body, when she slipped her fingers under his t-shirt. She was thin and delicate, and reminded him of Audrey Hepburn. She behaved in a very un-Audrey way however, when she tugged him into the bathroom, dropped the latch on the door and then dropped to her knees in front of him. Well, that was fucking unexpected. Having his dick inside the wet warmth of her mouth was incredible, and when she began to suck, it was borderline sublime. He understood the appeal of blowjobs very, very quickly, watching her pink tongue lave over his shaft, her eyes hooded, her hands grasping his thighs, her face looking like she was truly enjoying it. And when he gripped the back of her head, trying not to be forceful, but kind of failing, though she didn’t seem to mind, the sensation was even better. The sense of control, of utter dominance, the pleasure of thrusting into that willing mouth, the feeling of his cockhead bucking into the back of her throat, the pathetic little noises that she was making–it was unforgettable and unbelievable. It was a shame that he didn’t last as long as he would’ve liked to, but he lasted a decent amount of time for a fourteen year old. Like a good two and a half minutes. 
He came in her mouth, but she spit it out discreetly, which he didn’t love so much, but he couldn’t be choosy.
Wiping her lips, she winked at him and then asked a question that murdered his boner completely.
“How old are you, stud?”
God. It was only marginally better than her asking him if it was his first time.
“Old enough,” he grunted in response, and then fished out a hundred dollar bill and slipped it under the strap of her bra. She didn’t argue or anything, but got up and then pecked him on the corner of his mouth, biting on his lip ring and making him hiss. 
And that’s how he got his first real kiss.
But Fen was correct–Ruhn’s never been on a date. Ruhn had less than zero interest in dating anyone, and no one really wanted to date him either. The girls, the brave ones, thought that they did, but then, they quickly changed their minds. He wasn’t romantic. He wasn’t kind. He was barely nice. He fucked hard. Without tenderness or words or emotions. At least he always made sure that they came. However, he rarely, if ever gave head, didn’t cuddle, wasn’t interested in staying over or having them sleep over at his apartment at the hotel, and if he was being honest, he wouldn’t date him either. He was kind of an asshole. 
As usual, his life didn’t follow any normal patterns. He went from a post-kill blowjob, to a little kiss, and then nothing at all. During his formative years, he only had four girls that he fucked, and tried as he might to build a reputation as a manwhore at his boarding school, he couldn’t. He dominated the scene, he was one of the most feared guys in school, respected, obeyed, admired, but a player, he was not. 
His twenties were wild. A whole decade drenched in blood and cum.
Now, he was almost 32 years old. 
And Ruhn Danaan King has never been on a date.
The way he saw it, it wasn’t the end of the world, but it was weird. It definitely wasn’t normal.
Azriel’s been engaged to Morrigan. And then he married Elain. Those were pretty serious plays in the dating department.
Fenrys couldn’t stop dating! He dated everyone. He liked them, cherished them, adored them, used them, left them, and moved on to the next one.
Cassian’s been in a couple of semi-long term relationships, and also dated casually. And now, he was after the eldest Archeron sister, though without much success.
Rowan was once married, and then widowed. He was raising his four year old son by himself, and was now seriously involved with a girl named Aelin, and it definitely seemed like things were getting serious between the two of them.
Rhysand’s been with Feyre for almost 3 years now. Yes, he was a wealthy playboy prior to meeting her, but the pretty Bohemian artist enchanted him instantly and all women ceased existing for him. 
Ruhn…Well, there was that one time when he took his not-exactly-wife, but kind-of-wife Elain Archeron to Subway. He bought her a sandwich and Fanta. He took her to a museum as well, but truthfully, none of it was planned. Initially, he just wanted to tattoo her, and then he ended up fingering her and after that they went out on a whim. Ruhn was mostly curious about Elain’s knowledge and interest in art, which, to his great relief, was present–she wasn’t an expert, but she was well-versed in popular art and had appreciation for it. 
The thing was…well, Ruhn was hopelessly, passionately and irreversibly in love with Elain. He fucking loved his wife. Looking back, he wasn’t even sure when and how it happened. At what point did infatuation and mild obsession turn into love, into adoration, into soul-mating. Or, as Elain said, heart-mating with him. 
He didn’t mind sharing. That was the agreement, and it was the healthiest way for the four of them to live and exist in their relationship. They shared Elain and there was enough love in her for all of them, to satisfy them sexually and emotionally. Ruhn wouldn’t have it any other way. However, it didn’t mean that he didn’t want her for himself at times. Just the two of them, doing things as a couple, having a private relationship that was exclusively theirs. To some extent, it was happening between Elain and the men in her life–each one had a marriage with her, which was both public, but also private. 
Ruhn, however, figured that he wanted to have a proper date with his girl.
Elain was young and a romantic at heart, and obviously she wanted dates and flowers and all that cheesy shit that Ruhn knew nothing about. There was a reason why she screamed at Fenrys to fuck her ‘romantically’. He was the only one who would. From Ruhn, Elain came to expect rough–marks on her hips, imprints of his teeth on her skin, hair pulling, swollen nipples and aching pussy. She liked the pain, but she was under no illusions that Ruhn would be tender or sweet. And Ruhn was determined to prove her wrong. 
He couldn’t ask Fenrys–who would probably know and have a decent recommendation, but would also make it bigger and better for Elain, and would leave Ruhn in the dust. So that was out of the question. Azriel would just steal the idea, hog Elain, and leave Ruhn in the dust. And then, there was Google.
~
Cassian made it to the office early, as usual. He wanted to stop by Nesta’s office and bring her coffee, but then he thought better of it. Not the coffee part, because he would’ve gotten her that gross green water that she called ‘tea’--but because it seemed to him like Nesta truly moved on and was interested in Eris Vanserra. He didn’t want to think about it. Didn’t want to wound his bleeding heart anymore than it’s been sliced open already. Nesta was a bad idea. Always a terrible idea that promised to end badly, and here he was, being smacked in the face by his terrible ideas.
“Oh hey,” Cassian stopped abruptly, seeing his cousin Ruhn sitting in the still-empty room, long legs crossed and propped on the desk. “Why are you here? Is Elain okay?”
Somehow, and he didn’t know how it happened, but Cassian began worrying about Elain. It was like a contagion that was passed down to him and his men from Azriel.
“Yeah, she is good,” Ruhn said lazily, putting his phone away.
“What’s up?” Cassian took a sip of his coffee. 
Ruhn was unpredictable and Cassian never knew what would come out of the man’s mouth. Could be something nice. Could be something utterly horrible.
“Do you have Pinterest?” 
Yep. Weird.
His brow knitted in confusion, and Cassian asked,
“What?”
“Pinterest. Do you have it?”
“No. I am a man,” he reminded Ruhn slowly, enunciating every word.
Ruhn sighed and nodded, shoulders falling.
“Yeah, I get it. I figured I’d ask.”
“And you thought that I’d be the guy to have a Pinterest account?” Cassian raised his brow at him. “I feel like Fen would be more likely,”
“Maybe,” Ruh agreed with another sigh. “But I can’t ask him.”
“What do you need on Pinterest?” Now his interest piqued and Cassian bit into his blueberry muffin, looking at Ruhn expectantly. 
“Ideas…”
“What kind of ideas?”
Ruhn mumbled something unintelligible, but Cassian wasn’t going to give up and pressed him.
“Come on. What?”
“For a date!” Ruhn snapped, his normally dark, placid face suddenly turning kind of red.
“You need ideas for a date?” Cassian was confused. “With whom?”
“Elain!” Ruhn opened his arms, like he was talking to an idiot. “Who else?”
“You are taking Elain on a date? And you need Pinterest?”
“Whatever man, you won’t understand,” Ruhn rose and grunted dejectedly.
“Wait, wait. I am trying to. Let’s think about this.”
Exhaling loudly, Ruhn explained,
“I want to date my wife. Okay? And I want to go on a date with her–but not just a lame dinner or something. I don’t want to sit in some restaurant, but I also don’t want to go to some flower show! I don’t want people around. Just the two of us. Our date.”
“I hear you,”
“So I was thinking, I want to do a picnic,”
“That’s a good idea!” Cassian nodded enthusiastically.
“But I don’t know how to do a picnic!” Ruhn ran his hand through his hair, huffing in frustration. “I googled it, and it’s giving me all this shit that I don’t know how to do!”
“Like what?”
“I dunno, man. Fried chicken and deviled eggs and potato salad,”
Cassian smirked.
“Buy her a bucket of chicken,” he laughed.
“I am serious, Cass,” Ruhn said, sounding nervous and hopeless. “What am I gonna do? I want to do something nice and romantic and I can’t show up with a bucket of KFC chicken and some potato salad. She’d think I am insane.”
Rapping his long fingers on the desk, Cassian thought and muttered,
“Okay, okay. Let’s think about it. I think you googled stuff for 4th of July,”
“I just typed in ‘picnic ideas’,” Ruhn explained defensively.
“What does Elain like? Sweets, right?”
“Have you seen Elain with an eclair?”
“Yeah…She likes sweets and pastries. So buy some champagne, a few pastries…No offence, brother, but Elain seems like a cheap date.”
Ruhn laughed,
“I mean, yeah, she is.”
“Let’s face it, this is a chick who loses her mind over soccer and is ready to throw fists. She likes beer. She eats Fen’s horrid English sandwiches with white bread and fucking potato chips inside…This is not a fancy girl!”
“I know…But I also know that Lorcan made her pasta! And took her to the opera! I can’t beat that,”
“Well, of course you can beat that. But Elain likes beer and tacos. I mean, I don’t think she’d be opposed to you cooking dinner for her, but I also think she’d like you as you are,”
“A talentless hack?”
“Don’t cook her a crap meal, if you don’t know how to cook,” Cassian recommended bluntly. “Do something nice and something she’d enjoy. It would go a long way.”
Ruhn got up and squeezed Cassian’s shoulder.
“Alright, man, thanks!”
Cassian smiled and told him gently,
“I don't think you need to worry. It’s not like you have to close the deal.”
“Yeah,” Ruhn agreed. “But it’s also for me.”
~
Meet me at the King Tower, on the 44th floor at 8 pm
And…send. 
Elain: What’s happening?
She responded almost immediately and Ruhn smiled. 
Ruhn: Are you going to meet me?
Elain: I will. But should I worry?
Ruhn: Don’t need to worry.
Elain: What is this about?
Ruhn: Surprise.
Elain: I hate surprises! Tellllll meeeeeeeee.
He chuckled, imagining her cute little face, and how she was probably bouncing on her heels, like she always did when she wanted something. 
Ruhn: Nope, beautiful. But you can lube up your ass for me, like a good girl.
A lengthy pause.
He frowned wondering if he pushed it too hard.
He wanted to make it a joke, but it was his way of asking for it, and he hoped that she understood.
Elain: What? You wanna do the butt stuff?
Ruhn: When don’t I want to do the butt stuff? Will you surprise me?
Elain: I thought you were the one doing the surprising?
Ruhn: You want me to lube up my ass? As my lady commands. 
The conversation made him smile. Their conversations always devolved into something ridiculous, but that’s what he loved about Elain. He didn't know what to expect, and that was good. 
He wouldn’t have minded some anal. Just the two of them. For the first time, between Ruhn and Elain. 
The first time was special. Absolutely unforgettable. Completely, utterly amazing. Was it the best anal he’s ever had? Yes. Yes. Yes. No contest. But his brothers were there, there was the nervousness and the pressure of the ‘first time’ and now, he yearned to relive it again, but intimately, with just Elain and him.
But first, the date. 
~
Elain had no idea what was going on. Though she tried to figure it out and even texted Ruhn a few times during the day, he didn’t respond or was very vague in his answers. Which annoyed and frustrated Elain to no end, and she couldn’t concentrate at the shop and even messed up a bouquet and had to re-make it. 
Therefore, by the time it was 7:46pm, she was stomping across the lawn, heading from her house to the looming skyscraper that was the King Tower, which housed the King Enterprises, Azriel’s office, their businesses and the security arm of business. She took herself up to the 44th floor, using the secret elevator which only the family utilised. Floors 44-53 were where most of the businesses and offices were located, but it being almost 8 pm, she didn’t expect anyone to still be here. However, once she came out of the elevator and walked down the dimly lit hallway which had an original Rothko hanging on the wall, she was stopped in her tracks, because she saw Ruhn. And some woman. And she was the type of woman that was impossible to miss–statuesque, wearing neck-breaking stilettos, reedy thin, with perfect make up at eight in the evening! She wore an expensive satin blouse with a giant bow on the side and an elegant, tight skirt. Ruhn looked relaxed, propped against the wall, his massive arms folded over his chest. He wore a Guns-n-Roses t-shirt, black jeans and boots. His long hair was braided in a tight, neat braid. The woman said something, her perfectly manicured hand lightly touching his forearm, and he laughed, easily and openly. Then he said something, and she laughed as well, throwing her head back and exposing her throat to him.
They looked like they knew each other, because there was familiarity and an ease in their gestures. 
Elain didn’t think of herself as a jealous person, but she totally was. She didn't like her men talking to strange, attractive women. Especially when she looked the way that she looked right now–wearing Converse, cutoff denim shorts and Ruhn’s hoodie, which she picked up on the way out, because the evening was promising to be chilly. She dabbed some lip gloss on her lips and her wild hair was barely tamed in a messy bun.
Ruhn noticed her at last, his handsome face breaking into a welcoming smile. It was a nice smile. Genuine and happy. Like he was glad to see her, and the glamazon next to him didn’t matter. Ruhn was not an expressive man. Generally speaking, he maintained the same expression around people and whether he was angry, happy, hungry or murderous remained a secret for most. But Elain knew how to read him, just as she knew how to read Azriel. And currently, Ruhn was thrilled. 
“Ellie, you made it!” he gave a brief, disinterested hug to the gorgeous woman, and she winked at him and then smiled at Elain, as she passed them by and headed to the elevator.
“Well, you said 8 o’clock,” Elain crossed her arms and let some of her displeasure bounce off of him. Let him know that she was pissed.
“I did!” he nodded and then wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “And you are here.”
“Who was that?” she demanded rudely and impatiently.
He glanced at the elevator and the shrugged,
“Oh, that’s Em,”
“Who is she?”
He grinned and then growled and butted her face with his, biting softly on the apple of her cheek. She attempted to swat him away, screeching loudly, but he only laughed and licked her face like a dog.
“You are gross!”
“Yeah, grossly in love with you,” he agreed and then stopped and cupped her face in his hands.
She looked up at him, feeling both insecure and elated. 
“I love you too,” she murmured quietly. “That girl is very beautiful,”
“She is,” he nodded. Watching Elain’s scowl, he barked a laugh and then softly, tenderly, kissed her lips. “She is also very, very queer and Cerrdiwen’s girlfriend. So…..”
“Oh.”
Oh.
“I…I, that’s,” she mumbled, while he chuckled, “it’s not how I meant it…I mean…”
He pulled her to him and kissed the top of her head. 
“Yeah, I know what you meant–jealous little thing you are.”
“I am so not!”
“Oh, you so are.”
“Ohmygod!” 
Elain gasped audibly.
“What is all this?!” 
Ruhn tugged her by the hand and said, “Come on, beautiful.”
“You did this?” she gawked at the romantic setup.
They were on the roof of the building, 55 stories up in the air, the shimmering cityscape of Manhattan all around them. Millions upon millions of lights twinkled and sparkled all around them, and the noise of the city was muffled this high up. 
“I did do this,” he confirmed, looking slightly tense, maybe a bit uncomfortable.
She clutched his hands in hers and looked around, face full of wonder.
“But why?”
“Wanted to go on a date,” he muttered gruffly. 
“I love dates!”
“I hope I did okay,” he rubbed the back of his neck.
He didn’t miss her wearing his hoodie, and how sexy she looked in it. Not really sexy–the thing swallowed her whole–but to him, it was the sexiest damn thing there was. His woman, huddling in his clothes for warmth, getting his smell all over her.
A fluffy comforter pulled out from the closet. Check.
Another blanket, in case Elain got cold. Check.
A chocolate and caramel cupcake. Four bonbons. Two truffles. One glazed doughnut. A small loaf of bread. Check.
A bag of chips and a tub of dip. Check.
A bottle of Fanta. Check.
A chunk of cheddar. The good stuff. English. Check.
A bottle of Prosecco. Check.
Elain considered the odd assortment of foods, while Ruhn glared at her, his gaze hopeful, and seeking approval.
“The bakery didn’t have a lot of stuff left,” he explained quickly, and then added nervously, “and I know you love cheese.”
“I do love cheese,” she confirmed and then breathed, “it’s perfect! It’s a nighttime picnic!”
He smiled broadly,
“Yeah…yeah. Exactly.”
So what if there was expensive cheese, and cheap dip and potato chips, which made no sense? So what if there was Fanta on the menu? It was perfect.
Elain leapt into his arms and gushed,
“It’s perfect! It’s everything I ever wanted.”
“You wanted to go on a picnic?”
“Always! I love this!”
“Okay, well, sit down then,” he offered her, pulling her down on the blanket awkwardly.
He was terrible at this date thing, and Elain’s heart burst into a thousand million sparks of love for him.
He wasn’t confident and sleek like Azriel, or experienced and loose like Fenrys. He wasn’t even like Cassian, with his smirks and his fast mouth. He wasn’t brooding and amorous like Lorcan. 
This was Ruhn. Her Ruhn. A brutal, terrifying gang leader, who strung people from bridges in a cruel and odious display of power and dominance, someone who once shot seven people in a span of 13 seconds, a guy who cut off someone’s balls and then delivered them in a package, complete with a rose, to the man’s wife. Ruhn did a lot of crazy, unhinged, violent things. 
But he didn’t know how to date. And he loved her, his wife. 
He sat cross-legged next to her, and fumbled with his phone.
“I have some music,” he said, uncertainty lacing his voice, “or if you want to watch today’s Manchester City versus Arsenal match–we can do that,”
Elain smiled at him, and then keened towards his large body and pressed her lips to his neck, lacing her fingers with his.
“I love you so much,” she whispered, feeling the pulse of his jugular under her lips.
“I love you too,” he said softly, and then pulled her hair out of the bun and his nose brushed against her cheek. “So much.”
“The music,” she requested. “Let’s do the music tonight.”
Of course he realised too late that he forgot to bring any cutlery, plates or even glasses. 
Fuck his life!
But thankfully, there were napkins in one of the bags, and Elain didn’t even bat an eye. She smoothly arranged the napkins like place settings for them, and Ruhn handed her a knife–not one of his murder knives, thank god–and she sliced the bread and the cheese. He popped the cork on the Prosecco and it was cold enough not to bubble violently over everything. 
“Sorry baby,” he whispered and she laughed, took the bottle, and pulled a healthy swig of the bubbly. Patting her thigh, she had him lay his head on it, and then tore into the chips and dip and fed him a hefty helping of both.
He smiled, looking up at the starless skies above and lightly wrapped his arm around her bare leg, before kissing the inside of her knee. She plopped a piece of cheese in his mouth, and then said,
“I didn’t know you were romantic like that,”
“I really am not,” he protested.
“I don’t know,” she tutted. “Champagne, and pastries and a picnic.”
“Just keep it to yourself, beautiful,” he suggested with a grin.
“Street cred?” she confirmed knowingly.
“You know it.”
The music that they were listening to was mellow and old-fashioned. Elain sang along to some of the songs, because it was all the stuff she grew up on–Sinatra, Dean Martin, old Italian songs.
“How do you have these songs?” she demanded, bobbing along to ‘Pennies in Heaven’.
“Ummm,” he grunted, looking embarrassed. “It’s a Pandora radio station. Italian dinner…”
“You even thought of that?” she stroked his forehead, tucking his silky black hair behind his ear.
He shrugged like it wasn't a big deal.
“I know you like this music. So I thought it would be a good soundtrack to the date.”
“Strangers in the Night” came on just then and he sang along quietly, 
Strangers in the night
Exchanging glances,
Wondering in the night
What were the chances
We’d be sharing love before the night was through
Elain squeezed his hand and asked shyly,
“Dance with me?”
“Any time, sunshine,” he sat up and then wrapped his arm around her, and landed them both on their feet, as he swept her in a wide, exaggerated circle across the rooftop. It was a nice rooftop, made for parties and dancing and celebrations. Now it was empty, the space entirely theirs, the lights of the city and Frank’s smooth voice as their only companions. 
“You must really love me,” Ruhn mused, watching Elain’s elated face, as he spun her around. His hoodie, which she tied around her waist, flared dramatically, like a ball gown. 
She laughed, wrapping her arms around his neck, and he lifted her off the ground and waltzed with her, as she dangled next to him, his arm supporting her entire weight.
“I do,” she nodded, giggling, her converse-clad feet floating above his boots, “but what gave it away?”
“I am gonna go with you opting to dance with me, and eat cheese and laugh and listen to music, instead of watching football. And that was one hella big game too!”
“I love you more than football,” she confessed, looking into his brilliant, cold blue eyes. “I want to date you more than I want to watch football.”
He smoothed her hair lovingly with his available hand and whispered,
“I want to date you too. More than anything.”
Suddenly, the sky came alive.
Elain gasped and stared open-mouthed at the Thursday night fireworks.
“Oh my god! I forgot about these!” she cried out, her face happy and brightly illuminated by the explosions of green and purple and pink. He held her to himself, and looked up at the sky as well, where giant flowers blossomed and stars streaked across the darkness and exploded in silvery glitter.
The song switched to ‘My Way’, its bombastic, dramatic vocals and lyrics a perfect foil for the fireworks. Ruhn carried Elain back to the blanket, and then lay down, spread-eagled and threw their heads back, watching the show. 
“Wow,” she marvelled. “This is the best!”
“You like it, beautiful?”
She pointed to the sky and whispered,
“That’s how I feel with you, Ruhn. Like my heart explodes with love when I am around you. I dunno why.”
“I don’t mind,” he pulled her into his embrace and kissed her brow. “I don’t mind at all.”
She flipped onto her belly and pressed her lips to his. 
“Can I ask you something?” she inquired.
“Obviously. Because you will, regardless of what I say,” he smiled at her, his large, warm palm sliding down her back and cupping her ass.
“Okay, okay,” she pouted, but obviously his comment didn’t deter her from asking,
“If you didn’t have to do any of this…Like, if you could do anything, what would you do?”
“You are assuming I don’t like killing,”
“No, I am not. Perhaps you do. Obviously, you don't have any qualms about it. But I don’t know if you woke up one day and decided to become an assassin and an enforcer. So if you didn’t, then what would you do?”
Ruhn scrubbed his hand over his face and then looked at her, before kissing her gently. He was nice tonight. Softer than usual. Elain wondered if it was going to last.
“A house husband,” he announced easily.
“What?”
“That’s what I’d be–a house husband.”
She frowned thinking that he was joking.
The fireworks were still exploding above them and he popped a cigarette between his lips and lit up. 
“Honestly,” he turned on his side and brushed her cheek with his knuckles, “that’s what I want to do. Or rather, I don’t want to do anything. I want to tattoo, paint and sketch, and do fuck all else otherwise. If Az needed me to go and whack someone, I’d do it. But I’d love to be a house husband–keep a tidy, elegant home, do some cooking, some entertaining,”
“Are you for real?”
He shrugged,
“Why not? Everyone assumes that every man is full of wild ambition and needs to do stuff all the time. I don’t need to do anything. 
“My ideal life would be to wake up, fuck you, go get a professional shave at the barber’s, stop for a coffee, read the paper, shoot the shit with Cass, go to my shop, sketch, tattoo, meet you for lunch, fuck you, eat with you, maybe fuck you again a little bit. Go back to the shop, then maybe wander around some galleries, look at art, pick up stuff for dinner, go to the gym, pick you up from work, have a cocktail. On occasion, I’d talk business with Az and Fen. Dinner. Maybe even cook it myself for all of you. Have a couple more cocktails, play in the pool, play cards, fuck you.”
“How many times a day are you planning to fuck me?” she pondered.
“I dunno. Five-ish?”
“You are ambitious.”
“A man can dream,” he concluded, puffing out a cloud of smoke, his expression pensive and thoughtful. Like describing her perfect life made him wish for it to be true.
Elain sat up, and his palm landed on her upper thigh, squeezing lightly, while he made a little disgruntled noise when she separated from him.
“Come back,” he urged her, opening up his arm for her, but she just looked at him, cocking her head. Then she reached into her pocket and took something out, but didn’t show him.
“Do you still want to do it?” she asked at last.
“Do what?”
“You know,” and she tossed whatever she was holding atop of his chest. He craned his neck and picked up a tube, looking at it in confusion.
“Anal,” she pressed. “Do you want it?”
“Huh…Yeah,” he finally managed to say, looking dazed. 
Finally, when he dawned upon him what she was offering, he sat up abruptly and she laughed at his eagerness.
“You serious?” he pressed, twisting the tube of lube in his fingers.
She nodded and whispered, “Yeah. I want to do it again.”
“Did you like it the first time?” he asked.
“It was a lot,” she admitted. “But I loved it…how you did it.”
She blushed, and unbuttoned her shorts. 
Ruhn almost tore the shorts off her slender thighs, rolling them down so quickly, it almost gave her a fabric burn. 
“Take everything off,” he ordered, as he pulled his t-shirt over his head, his icy blue eyes never leaving hers, “leave the keds.”
She was completely naked in front of him in less than a minute, but still wearing her converse, her long hair spilling all over her body. He crawled towards her over the blanket and kissed her knee, parting her legs carefully, eyeing her pink slit. 
“How do you want it?” he asked, his voice hoarse, his rough, large palms smoothing over her inner thighs, parting her legs even further, opening her up bit by bit.
“How you’d normally give it to me,” she requested shyly, stroking his arm. “Rough. Deep. How you always do it.”
He looked at her intently, seeking any hesitation or falseness, but found none.
“I love you, Ruhn,” she reminded him calmly. “Just the way you are. If you are going to ride my ass, I want you to ride it like Ruhn would.”
He smirked and spread her legs widely, as she slid back and propped herself on her elbows, watching him and his ravenous gaze, tracking the movement of his eyes, as they took in her wet, slick pussy, before he pushed her back a bit, so he could see her other hole.
“Did you lube it up for me?” he raised his brow, just as his finger slipped from her opening, dragging some of the moisture down below.
“Nope,” she popped her lips. “My holes are yours, but you do the work.”
He grinned savagely and nodded, muttering, “just like I like it!”
The sight of her so nicely spread for him, so ready and willing made his dick hard as a fucking rock and he knew he’d have to pace himself, because he was in danger of blowing his load before he even got inside that sweet ass.
“Spread it for me a little bit, sweetheart,” he urged her, “show me how much you want it.”
She looked so adorable like this: completely naked, with her large, round breasts and the soft thighs, and the little keds, which skirted the edge of some sort of fetish, but he wasn’t going to think about that now. Not when she reached down, and pulled her cheeks apart for him, opening that cute little hole a bit more. She was looking at him, biting her lower lip, her ass nicely stretched, and he brought the tip of his dick to her lips. She kissed it immediately, and caught a bead of precum with the tip of her tongue, gliding her tongue over the smooth cockhead.
“Put it in, Runnie,” she requested with a pout. “I want it!”
“Do you want me to stretch you a little bit first, beautiful?” he asked, and dipped his cock between her folds, gathering some of the slick with his shaft. She shuddered when he brushed over her clit a few times, her back arching, her hands kneading her pale lovely butt cheeks impatiently.
“No,” she moaned. “I want to feel it…How you fill me up.”
He wasn’t going to argue and squirted a generous amount of lube between her cheeks, before placing her feet on his shoulders and pushing her legs way back, as he leaned into her. 
“Relax, sunshine,” he kissed her lips softly, with a kind, soothing kiss, seeing how she tensed beneath him. “I am going to make it good for you. But your pretty asshole belongs to me, doesn’t it?” he asked, while the tip of his cock circled the tight rim of her anus. “Will you give it to me like my good girl?”
“I am your good girl,” she muttered, as she looked between their bodies, back to biting her lip in anticipation.
“That’s right,” he growled, pressing into her tiny hole, as her breath hitched loudly in her chest, “and good girls get their tushies fucked,” propping himself on one arm above her shoulder, he pushed his cock forward, breaching the ring and eliciting a loud, pained moan from her. 
Fuck it felt good. So good. 
Her head lolled back, as her thighs trembled around his shoulders, as she took inch after inch after inch of his thick shaft inside her narrow, scorching hot rectum.
He knew he’d never get enough of this. The sensation of possession, or her complete submission, her sad, pretty moans, the nervous twitching of her long, tight passage was simply amazing. Was ‘amazing’ the right word? It wasn’t enough. Amazing wasn’t enough. 
“Ohmygod. Ohmygod,” she cried out again and again, while he licked his lips, muttering, ‘just a little more, sweetheart. You are taking it all in, my love,”
“Yes, yes,” she gasped quietly, “ohmygod, it’s so much!”
“You like getting your pretty ass filled,” he insisted, “it needs my dick in there,”
“I am having second thoughts!” she complained and he laughed, kissing the top of her head. 
“No you are not,” he tsked. “Look at you! Your hole is packed with dick, just like it’s supposed to be,” he added proudly, bottoming out. 
She bit his chin, his neck, licking mindlessly on whatever she could reach with her tongue and her lips, moaning loudly and unabashedly. She didn’t give a shit if she was making a ton of noise–she was being fucked in the ass by a nine inch dick, and his balls were currently slapping against her skin. She was panting, sweat trickling down her brow, the bead immediately licked by Ruhn’s eager tongue. 
He kept himself fully sheathed inside of her, but didn’t move, though she noticed the strain of his muscles, the tension of his cobbled abdomen and the bulging of his biceps, as he kept himself back and allowed her to adjust.
Taking deep breaths, she nuzzled into his neck and whispered, “you can move now.”
He exhaled and replied, “give me a sec, beautiful.”
He smiled against his skin, realising that he was straining not only to keep himself in check, but also to keep himself from coming. 
“Do I feel good for you?” she asked, kissing him around the ear. “Is my poor ass nice for your mammoth cock?”
“Better than anything!” he assured her and then pulled back at last, before gliding back inside.
The drag of his dick was mesmerising. The most glorious feeling that Elain could imagine. Sure, she loved orgasms–who didn’t?--but it was this that she cherished. The long pull of the thick length, emptying her almost completely, before filling her back up. God she loved it. It was so painful, the burn acute and deep, as her passage accommodated the unbelievably tight fit of him in her, but it also felt absolutely indescribable. 
“God, you are so big,” she choked out, knowing that she probably shouldn't be stroking Ruhn’s massive ego right now, because his cock’s been praised and admired plenty, but she couldn’t help it. He was huge, and he felt so, so good inside of her.
He fucked her with deep, firm, but languid thrusts, only his hips working atop of her thighs. He readjusted his position, lifting himself off of her, and holding her feet to his shoulders, while he pumped hard into her ass. Her tits bounced and jumped with every powerful push, and he was watching her huff and grunt beneath him, ordering her to ‘keep your cheeks spread, sweetheart. Are you my sweet girl?”
“Yes,” she nodded, knowing that she was weak and needy for him, and would probably do anything to have him continue pounding into her ass. “I love it,” she moaned. “I love it so much…”
He smirked indulgently at her, nodding slowly,
“I know, sweetheart. I know. That little hole was made just for me. You can take more, can’t you?”
She nodded, watching his stunning body flex and work atop of her. All the ink, the sensational musculature, the smooth, dark golden skin painted with intricate designs–a living canvas of chaos. 
“Isn’t it good to be mine?” he asked.
“Always, my house husband,” he smiled widely at him, relishing the glorious burn and build up of pleasure inside of her. 
He barked a laugh, nosing against her nose, whispering, “Not yet. But something to aspire to.”
Elain knew that Ruhn was holding himself back a little with her, and she appreciated it. He was loving her in his usual manner–forceful, open, unrestrained, yet slightly more careful and caring. Her clit demanded attention, and without her even saying anything, he was already on it, his thumb pressing on it firmly and rubbing steadily. 
“Oh it’s good, it’s good,” her eyes closed and she indulged in all the sumptuous, gorgeous, erotic sensations that currently engulfed her body. The even, unfaltering rhythm of his cock in her ass brought her to an orgasm quicker than she anticipated, and she shook and screamed until she was hoarse, not caring about anything, but the beautiful slamming of his cock and the magic of his finger. 
Ruhn wasn’t far behind. His arms clasped her now-pliant, softened body, and he pulled her up into his embrace, holding her like a ragdoll on his lap, as he fucked easily into her, and she kissed him sleepily, draping her arms around his shoulders.
He finished deep inside of her, hot and abundant, and didn’t release her from his hold for a long time, kissing her and stroking her hair.
“Noooo, not yet,” she pleaded, when he made a move to withdraw.
He kissed her again and smiled, laying both of them on their side, his soft cock still nestled inside of her, just like she wanted. 
“Let’s eat more chips and drink Fanta!” she proposed decisively.
Ruhn chuckled, arguing, “this is supposed to be a romantic date. Chocolates and music and wine,”
In turn, she reminded him, “Instead, we got chips and dip and dancing and anal. All of my favourite things!”
He hummed to himself and thought that this was not a bad first date.
Not a bad date at all.
51 notes · View notes
morganofthewildfire · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media
-------------------------------------------
A Place To Go
-------------------------------------------
literally have no idea what this is lol, it is probably very bad so just be warned
~2k words
-------------------------------------------
Aelin was sitting right across from him, her legs tucked under herself, her hands holding up her deck of cards in front of her, her top teeth gnawing on her lower lip as she considered her next move. Rowan had already gone, leaving him to watch as she figured out what to do, or tried to figure out if there even was anything to do. 
Two games deep into Uno, and three glasses of wine in, he was feeling a bit loose and light hearted, especially as he got closer and closer to winning. He only had four cards left in his hands, while she had nearly eight. He couldn’t quite tell because they were all bunched together in a messy stack, not separated enough to be told apart. 
He’d nearly told her to fix it, so he could clearly see his competition, but Aelin had just smiled at him and he’d forgotten all about it. She had such a beautiful smile, so warm and so inviting. She could just smile at him, and he’d do anything she wanted, he’d trust her with anything. In the six years they’d known each other, she’d never broken his trust. 
Even back in college, where they’d met, she’d been the most honest person he’d known, refusing to cheat on any assignment no matter how easy it would be to. She would do things the right way, or not at all, she’d always said to him. And Aelin hadn’t gone back on those words despite how many times their collective friend group had made fun of her.
Especially Fenrys, who cheated his way to graduation.
He had faith she wouldn’t go back on her wordsnow, especially with money on the line. Yes, they’d fallen prey to the sinful wiles of gambling, a stack of money they added to with each game. It’d started with just the first round, each of them betting ten dollars that they’d win. Then, when he’d won, she’d proposed double or nothing. And then when she’d won after that, Rowan had proposed best two out of three.
Cash had been added each time, and now here they were, smack in the middle of their third game. And he was so close to victory. 
Rowan had a stable job, working in marketing. He didn’t need the money, but he wanted to see her face when he won. Aelin had a stable job too, last he’d heard. She’d graduated with a degree in Literature, wanting to fulfill her childhood dream of being an author. But she’d also known it wouldn’t happen right away, and had gotten a “normal person job” as she’d put it. She liked to bounce around between places, and had worked maybe five jobs in the two years since graduation? 
Despite how close they were, Aelin was still an immensely private person. 
She always had been, since they’d met. But that hadn’t changed how in love with her he was. Even though he’d never had the guts to tell her. No matter how much time she’d spent in his apartment in college, no matter how much time she spent in his apartment now, he’d never uttered those words. 
They just floated along as friends, ignoring the fact that he wanted to be more. 
They were at his apartment now actually, after she’d come over this evening after work. She was probably going to sleep here too, they did that all the time. It just blurred the lines even more.
“Draw 2,” Aelin said, setting down a card, and he groaned playfully, earning a laugh as he reached for the draw pile, adding two more cards to his unfortunate bounty. It’s okay, he was still in the lead. He was pretty sure. 
“How many cards do you have?” Rowan asked, narrowing his eyes, and Aelin smiled slightly at him, rolling her beautiful eyes.
“Eight,” she said petulantly. “You should know from the multiple times you’ve asked me already.” 
“I can’t see them all,” he complained, and she sighed.
“It hurts my hand to hold them that way,” she explained, “can’t you just trust me?” He hummed in teasing consideration, giving in when she once again smiled.
“Fine. It doesn’t matter because I’m going to win anyways,” Rowan said, dropping a card onto the pile. 
“Whatever you say,” Aelin said loftily, shrugging her shoulders. He took another sip of wine as he watched her set a blue eight right on top of his green eight, switching up the color in play. He looked down at his own cards as he figured out what to play next, furrowing his brows as he juggled back and forth between his green two and his green six. It was fortunate he had a lot of green, but there was too much strategy involved in figuring out which one to play.
A slight shuffling caught his attention, but when he glanced up he didn’t see any sort of movement, so he looked back down at his cards. He ended up choosing the green two, setting it carefully on the pile.
She played almost immediately after that, dropping another card. 
And so it went for the next couple of hands, going back and forth between either drawing cards or playing cards until - 
“Uno!” She shouted, holding up a singular card left, leaving him aghast. When had she gotten rid of all of hers?
With a renewed sense of competition, he focused back on the game, determined to win. But it was to no avail, for the next hand, she dropped her last one onto the pile, throwing her arms up in victory. 
He threw his remaining cards down, cursing under his breath, especially as she giggled and reached for the pile of money, playfully counting the bills. 
“Congratulations,” he said drily, and she rolled her eyes again. 
“Don’t be a sore loser,” she told him, and he wanted to scoff. But he just pouted like a child as she folded up the money she’d won, setting it aside as she reached for both of their wine glasses. “Want anymore?” She asked, and he nodded miserably. She just chuckled at him, uncurling herself to stand up. 
But as she did, her shorts swayed with the action and an Uno card distinctly fell out of the pocket, landing softly on the carpet below. Rowan blinked, not understanding what he was seeing at first, before slowly looking up at her stricken face. 
A moment of silence passed before Aelin blurted out - “I can explain.”
----
She’d looked so distraught and guilty that Rowan couldn't be mad at her. Especially when she took the money and methodically stacked it, setting it down on his kitchen counter. 
Neither of them had spoken in the ten minutes or so that passed, Rowan just sipping on his new glass of wine, and Aelin pacing nervously as she clearly sought how to say what she needed to say. To explain.
He wasn’t mad, there was clearly some reason for what she’d tried to do. He just wanted to know what it was.
“You know the job I got recently?” She asked, finally stopping her pacing to stand in front of him where he was sitting at the counter. It was nearly pitch black outside, the lights of the city the only thing lighting up the room besides the dim kitchen lights. 
“The one at the bookstore?” He asked, raising a brow as he tried to place it in his mind. She was wringing her hands together, picking at the skin of her fingers, and he reached out a hand to grab hers, stopping herself from maiming her own body. 
It was a tick of hers, had been since childhood, he knew. Aelin had had a rough upbringing. Her parents had died young and she’d been shuffled into foster care, commencing a journey of getting passed around, loveless and abused in multiple cases. 
She didn’t have any family beyond the friends she’d made. 
“Yes, that one,” she nodded, smiling tightly as he squeezed her hand. 
“What about it?” Rowan asked, and she began chewing on her lip, looking everywhere but him. And that’s when he knew something was really wrong. “Aelin?”
She let go of his hand, idly walking toward the window, beginning to speak when she was looking away from him.
“Well,” she started. “The owner moved out of the country to go retire near his kids. And -” she loosed a breath. “He closed the store down.”
Rowan furrowed his brows. “Okay?” He asked. “Where do you work now?”
Silence.
“Aelin?” He pressed, and his heart sank as he heard what was unmistakably a quiet sob. “Aelin,” he breathed, standing up immediately and heading over there. The moment he reached her, setting a hand lightly on her arm, she turned around and buried her head in his chest, crying.
“I’m so sorry,” she said, shaking her head back and forth. “I didn’t know what to do.” Rowan just kissed the top of her head, holding her tight. “I didn’t want to steal from you, but I have nowhere to go.”
His heart panged, dread forming in his gut at the words. He lightly grabbed her upper arms, pulling back a little bit away from her.
“What do you mean?” He asked softly, weak at the tears in her blue eyes. 
“I haven’t been able to find another job,” she whispered tightly, “it’s been so fucking hard out there.” She shook her head. “And I can’t finish my book, and I’m running out of money and I got evicted last week, all my stuff is in a storage unit and I didn’t know what else to do and -” she choked on a sob, stopping her rambling and Rowan pulled her closer again.
“Gods,” he cursed, “Why didn’t you tell any of us?” He was on the verge of tears himself. “I would’ve helped you out.” But he already knew the answer.
“I couldn’t,” she choked out, “I was embarrassed.” She pulled back, looking up at him. Rowan lifted a hand to her cheek, brushing the tears from under her eye. “But I’m scared.”
The mood in the apartment had changed dramatically, from playful and fun to morose just like that. But he was always going to be here to comfort her. He was always going to be there for her.
“It’s nothing to be embarrassed about,” he reassured her, looking into her watery eyes. “I want to know these things, I want to be able to help you.” She looked away at that, cheeks flushing, and he knew she was going to try and avoid taking his help. Like always. “Where have you been staying?” He asked, and she blushed more.
“I’ve been couch surfing,” she said quietly, looking at his shirt. Rowan was sure there were wet spots from her crying spell, but he didn’t give a shit. “I was hoping I could stay here tonight?”
Aelin looked back up at him then, her face vulnerable, and that sealed the deal. He shook his head.
“No,” he said, and her face became guarded. “You’re not just going to stay here tonight. You’re going to stay here until you get back on your feet.” 
“Rowan…” she said, beginning to shake her head, but he was firm.
“You’re not going anywhere else,” he repeated, and he barely had time to react before she was leaning up and pressing a short kiss to his lips. He was just staring, stunned, as she pulled back, clearly sending the wrong message.
“Gods, I’m so sorry,” she began to utter, but he cut her off, leaning in to kiss her back. This one was deeper, and he sunk into the feeling, finally, finally, getting to see what she tasted like. 
One of his arms stayed on her face, the other holding her waist, and both of her arms hooked around the back of his neck, pulling him closer. They made out for an indiscernible amount of time, slowing down until it was a lazy slide of their lips, just relishing in the closeness.
They were both breathing heavily when they pulled back, and Aelin was already smiling when he met her gaze. 
“I love you,” she whispered, and he wasn’t even surprised. All he did was smile back. 
“I love you too,” he said, resting his forehead against hers. “And you’ll always have a place here.”
----
taglist:
@wordsafterhours
@romancinghollywood
@superspiritfestival
@wishfulimaginings
@larisssss
@punkassbookjockey26
@shyvioletcat
@aelinchocolatelover
@s-uppertime
@leiawritesstories
@elentiyawhitethorn
@backtobl4ck
@goddess-aelin
@fromthelibraryofemilyj
@justreadertings
@rowaelinismyotp
@live-the-fangirl-life
@swankii-art-teacher
@tomtenadia
@highqueenofelfhame
@firestarsandseneschals
@thegreyj
@mariamuses
@house-of-galathynius
@rowanaelinn
@llyncooljones
@story-scribbler
@charlizeed
@bookcide
@elizarikaallen
@slytherhys
@booknerdproblems
@earthtolinds
@rowaelinrambling
@courtofjurdan
102 notes · View notes
greypetrel · 3 months
Note
From the not so nice asks, Alone and Pain for Raina and Aisling (and maybe the other girls too if you wanna)? c:
Hello there! :3
Tis the prompt list!
alone: How does your OC deal with loneliness? Have they ever been completely alone before? How do they act when there's no one around to see them?
Raina: Pretty well. There are moments she actually seeks loneliness out to keep quiet and unwind thoughts. She has never been completely alone for more than some hours, but she soughts moments on her own often. Usually she knits on her own, exercise with daggers... Has something to do and occupy herself with, because she struggles to stay still. Except in the Hanged Man: she goes there when she needs to unwind or sort thoughts out, staying in the corner table, out of the way, with white noise of people chatting and laughing relaxes her.
Aisling: She is terrorized by being lonely and be left alone forever, and was never totally on her own until she travelled to Haven. The Inquisition made her feel pretty alone more than once, but the big peak of it was after Trespasser (mentally, she wasn't alone and she got through because she collected people who didn't let her until she finally realised it and believed it). She keeps busy when there's no one else around to see her, she reads trashy novels, draws (poorly)... She's the one character more likely to start dancing by herself (blasting music full-volume in a modern AU, or just singing her own soundtrack in canon). She's an introvert, but her favoured method to recharge batteries is definitely parallel play.
pain: What's the worst pain your OC has ever felt? Do they have a high pain tolerance?
Raina: She has a low pain tolerance, suggested Fenris to just take her ovaries or/and uterus away more than one time to get rid of period cramps. As far as the worst pain she got, physically: she got impaled by the Arishok. That hurt. Particularly because she ignored and took some steps to tell the nobles that they could go fuck themselves right after. She'll say that the worst part of the experience was being bed-ridden.
Aisling: She has a high pain tolerance, but helped her mother in an infirmary and the halla-keeper enough to know when to stop to not get any permanent damages. The worst she got in terms of pain was the Anchor when it flared up, and that one time a Giant stepped on her leg and shattered her femur in the Emerald Graves.
Answering also with Alyra because I have a gif for her:
Tumblr media
5 notes · View notes
shivunin · 8 months
Note
Hi! Old age/aging headcanon for your babies?
Hey! Thank you so much for asking c:
(Headcanon asks)
I think by the time Wen is old, she has a plethora of tattoos from Zev. They add one for every significant event, and by the time she's old Wen doesn't have many large sections of uninked skin left. Also, I like to imagine she looks like a stiff wind would blow her away, but can still beat the shit out of someone who thinks she is frail. Just---unexpectedly spry for an old woman. Also, she still has like a billion pets.
Maria marks each sign of aging with delight. Once her hair is finally all silver and white, she proudly tells Fenris they finally match and he laughs (as she intended, of course). I think the role of grand dame would suit her well, and of course they have truckloads of grandkids whom she entertains with light shows. She would be very stately, I think, and shock people by looking very serene and then cracking an improbably crude joke.
Elowen becomes a bit of a hermit in her old age. I think she stops needing to uphold other people's expectations and starts creating a space for herself that she loves. Just---fucks off into the wilderness with one of those funky houses you find on accident while wandering the map. There is a cozy corner with her drawings and letters all set how she likes them, trunks of odds and ends she's picked up along the way, and a secret bookcase that leads to her bedroom and its massive bed.
Emmaera...oof. In the canon universe, I think she spends increasing amounts of time on her research and builds a network of Firsts and Keepers to share information even during years when there is no Arlathven. Research held in each "cell" of a clan can mean that history is lost permanently if the clan dies (she came painfully close to seeing it happen to her own clan, of course) so I think she tries to find a way to share that information among clans and create a standing record outside of them. The older she gets, the more important this becomes to her, I think.
(I wrote a whole thing about Wander Emma and it made me so sad that I deleted it, so...we're just going to leave it at that)
Salshira in old age finally lets some of her walls down. It becomes less and less appealing to reshape herself to entertain and push away others, and eventually she just stops. She is still charming and funny, I think, because that's a part of who she is, but it becomes less of a shield and more of a way to build connections. I like the idea of her life not holding some grand purpose or great project, but just...getting to be at peace in having a home and family that belong wholly to her. She's always been one of the most at ease in her own body of all my OCs and I like to think that continues as she grows older. Just...delight at knowing she hasn't seen everything she'll become yet.
And Ilriane, of course, my poor forgotten baby, is cursed with immortality and will never grow old c:
8 notes · View notes
vaguely-concerned · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
A post-Inquisition comic about Hawke coming home, because my heart has been aching since 2014 and I needed some catharsis at long last haha. I drew most of this over Christmas but I never intended it to become a longer thing as I was doing the first page, which is why Hawke's outfit changes completely after that. Huge plus of drawing with a ballpoint pen: forces you into an anti-perfectionist YOLO whatever-happens-happens mindstate, since once you've put the mark down on the page you just have to live with it. Huge drawback of drawing with a ballpoint pen: once you've put the mark down on the page you just have to live with it. Ah well, c'est la vie
Transcript of the dialogue under the cut/some corrections, because some of it got lost along the way to digital or fell victim to my terrible handwriting, and in some places I changed my mind about the wording but as previously mentioned: ballpoint pen and all that entails lmao
Merrill: Varric said you tried to stay behind in the Fade.
Hawke: Yeah, well, there’s some BIG potential in the housing market in there. Could’ve made a killing. Alas, it was not to be. 
Merrill: Hawke, I — I don’t think you understand what you mean to us. Or… or if you do, I don’t understand how you could still think — how you could act as if…
Hawke: …As if?
Merrill: As if you don’t MATTER!
Merrill: We would follow you anywhere, if only you’d let us. You have to know that.
Hawke: Yes, I know. I think that might be part of the problem. Maybe you guys should upgrade your standards for who to follow from ‘the first and best person in the group with any sense of direction’. 
Merrill: To guide those who are lost is an act of hellathen — a noble struggle. There is no shame in it. 
Hawke: There is when what you’re most likely to lead them to is grim and painful doom. I seem to have an unfortunate trend on my hands. If one is to be regarded as misfortune and two starts to look like carelessness, I shudder to think what I’ve been up to. 
Merrill: Is that why you sent us away?
Hawke: I never — 
Merrill: Hawke, you are wonderfully clever in so many ways, but please don’t act as if I do not know you. 
Hawke: It… was my responsibility. 
Merrill: Was it?
Hawke: My fault, certainly. 
Merrill: We were there when you found Corypheus too, you know. And we couldn’t stop it either. Does that make it our guilt as well?
Hawke: It’s not the same.
Merrill: Isn’t it? Do you think Bethany’s to blame as well, through blood alone?
Hawke: HAH! No, I don’t. And it’s very unkind of you to call me out on it, by the way. Rude. 
Merrill: I do know you pretty well by now.
Hawke: You do. 
Hawke: It wasn’t about that, anyway. Not really. It was good old-fashioned run-of-the-mill cowardice. 
Merrill: I don’t believe that.
Hawke: It was. It had already been on my mind, but as that demon spoke I could no longer pretend… I couldn’t ignore anymore that… 
Merrill: …Hawke?
Hawke: …that I would rather die than have to see another one of you — to have to bury one more — to fail you all yet ag—... I can’t…I can’t. 
Merrill: Oh, Hawke. I’m so sorry. 
Hawke: I can’t lead anyone anywhere, Merrill. I’m lost too. 
Merrill: I know. I know. We all are. But —
Merrill: But you gave us the gift of not having to walk that path alone. When there was no other shelter in this world, you gave us a home. Please, lethallin, let us give the same to you. You don’t have to lead to anywhere. Just allow us to walk beside you. It pains me to think of you all alone. 
You know, I, um — I still have that ball of twine Varric gave me. We could share it, if you want. 
Hawke: That’d be great, Merrill. Thank you. 
Merrill: I missed you so much. All of you. 
Hawke: Even Fenris?
Merrill: Even Fenris. And his scowl. 
Hawke: …I missed you too. Ah! That reminds me — I’ve got something for you! A gift.
Merrill: Oh, you didn’t have to — 
Hawke: Take it as an apology for all the Wintersend presents I missed while I was away. 
Merrill: A feather? Ma serannas, lethallin, it’s lovely! I’ve never seen one like this, what kind of bird is it from? Hm. It’s so big… This is going to sound so silly, but if I didn’t know any better I would have almost though it was from a griff — 
…a griff…
…a…???!! :D
Hawke: Don’t worry, I’ll explain everything. Well. What tiny part of everything I actually understood, anyway. …I’m sorry, Merrill. I’m back now, I promise. And you would have made a much better Keeper than you give yourself credit for. Let’s go home. 
Merrill: Oh, yes, let’s! Varric let everyone know, so Aveline should be waiting outside the city, and Isabela said she’d pick up Fenris once her ship is ready again, and — and please tell me about the griffons, lethallin, I am dying to know!
(please imagine Hawke doing a frighteningly good 'no shit there I was' Varric impression and then explaining whatever the fuck went down at Weisshaupt here, THE END)
Also some clarifications: Hawke did not kill Anders, he just feels extremely bad about and responsible for everything at all times (he asked Anders to leave and sided with the mages), and Hawke has been travelling with (Circle) Bethany the whole time since Weisshaupt, so that's why Merrill doesn't mention her. She Is Okay, Baby Sister Safe and Accounted For, please do not worry.
24 notes · View notes
Note
What’s your opinion on Fenders?
i was going to make a "you must be new here" joke since it's no secret that i ship them, but i'll go ahead and elaborate.
i find anders and fenris's canon relationship to be one of the most disappointing wastes of potential in the series. it makes sense that they'd start off hostile, but i think we can all recognize that the writers played up the rivalry between these (and other) characters solely for the sake of drama.
they spend seven years in the same social group, routinely fighting alongside each other. i cannot believe that in that time they would never manage to find common ground. and in fact, them going from hating each other to sympathizing with and understanding each other would have been an AMAZING arc.
i'm not saying they needed to be besties or 100% agree with each other, but a mutual respect of the others' perspective and having debates where they actually listen to each other would make more sense than anders approving of selling fenris back into slavery and fenris approving of making a deal with a demon to kill anders ever did.
the thing is that anders and fenris are so similar. but because of their respective origins and traumas, it's difficult for them to see that. and there is SO MUCH you can do with that, so much angst and drama you can milk from that premise. but instead we get the cheap, cruel drama of fenris implying karl maybe deserved to be tranquil and anders calling fenris a wild dog.
it's just such a waste! they both fundamentally oppose institutions of oppression and seek freedom for themselves. they fight on behalf of their respective peoples (anders championing mage rights and post-da2 fenris hunting slavers). they both struggle in dealing with their trauma, and are both passionate, determined, loving men.
to bring this back to fenders, i enjoy exploring the potential of what could have been; like i said, there's lots of drama and angst and emotional catharsis to draw from it. and on a personal level, i enjoy relationships with 1) unexpected pairings and 2) where the people involved have to put in effort to make it work. and fenders has both of these in spades.
38 notes · View notes
ragnarokhound · 9 months
Text
tagged by @hardlycats! :D
name: Elizabeth! I've also gone by Fenris while online, haha - old username habits die hard :)
pronouns: she/her :) also down with she/they
where do you call home: the pacific northwest owo
favorite animal: a toughie, because I like Many, but zebras were my favorite when I was a kid, and wolves are a big one (...clearly >.>) Dragons tho. If we include mythical animals then dragon hands down, no question
cereal of choice: REESES PUFFS REESES PUFFS (peanut butter chocolate flavor) this was for the joke (insert kombucha girl meme here) fr fr I like rice krispies/choco krispies, if I eat cereal at all
visual, auditory, or kinesthetic learner: kinesthetic probably haha - often people will show me and then tell me a thing, but I really have to just. Try it myself to really Get It. In one ear out the other with me sometimes OTL
first pet: Smokey the goldfish O3O I think...I may have been responsible for Smokey's untimely demise. 4 y o me dumped a little too much food in the aquarium :') RIP Smokey 😔
favorite scent: hm! I don't usually think about this - probably sandalwood, or pine. Fresh cut sawdust :)
do you believe in astrology: I am versed enough to get by with the folks who do lol i'm a libra sun, gemini moon, leo ascending u_u and i kind of know what that all means lmao
how many playlists on spotify/apple music: oh no. ohhh nooo. don't. don't look at me-- oh god. oh no look i've dropped them oh god now i'll be here all day *starts shoving them back into my backpack
(if we don't count other people's playlists that i follow. 285)
sharpies or highlighters: sharpies no contest
songs that make you cry: i don't cry at a whole lot of music! but if we want the same vibe then Little Fall of Rain, On My Own & Empty Chairs At Empty Tables from Les Mis (the london cast recording, not the movie lol) and Vagabond by Misterwives, Andra by The Ghost Of Paul Revere, Liar by the Arcadian Wild, Id by Charlie Allen, I Need My Girl by The National...listen I have a playlist for this lmao
songs that make you happy: Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go by Wham (reminds me of my little brother :)) & Cardiac Arrest by the Bad Suns, Talk Too Much by COIN, Almost (Sweet Music) by Hozier...Listen. I Have A Playlist For This
do you write/draw/create: i write fic! I also went to school for art education and am endorsed to teach art (to high schoolers when I get the chance lol). I was a girl scout arts and crafts specialist for a camp two years in a row, and recently I subbed for a high school ceramics teacher for the last quarter of school and made a bunch of ceramic stuff, it was really fun! I also paint, draw, crochet, cross stitch, and if I had a sewing machine I'd probably sew haha.
I am at the whim of ADHD brain tho (probably >.> squints in undiagnosed) and only post things online sporadically. My JayTim phase is actually the Most active I've been and also stayed in any online activity that involves me making things and also posting them lol
tagging but no pressure: oh yes um! only if you want to! @shineyma | @beanboop | @listen-to-the-inner-walrus
4 notes · View notes
moontheoretist · 2 years
Text
Sebastian: It's our duty to tell the templars.
Fenris: Then why haven't you done it?
Sebastian: I guess I was hoping they'd come to it on their own.
Fenris: And then you wouldn't have to betray Hawke's friends, right?
Sebastian: That's not reason enough to allow a maleficar to walk free.
(If Anders is in the party)
Anders: You think the templars don't know I'm here? They just haven't caught me yet.
(If Merrill is in the party)
Merrill: Are you talking about me?
Sebastian: Which of us should do it? Shall we draw lots?
Fenris: Uh-uh. You want to turn them in, you work it out with Hawke.
This is one of those OOC quotes on par with Anders feeling ok with giving Fenris to Danarius and Fenris selling Feynriel to the Sloth Demon. It doesn’t make sense, because I don’t believe that Sebastian really hated Anders that much. And this quote applies to Merrill as well, with whom Sebastian is friendly. It literally doesn’t fit anything about Sebastian, his arc, or his version of belief in the Chantry as he speaks against the Chantry numerous times, while still staying faithful to it at the same time. This quote is even worse if you were playing as a mage or romanced him as a mage. I am happy that I never got this banter during my first playthrough, because it would sour all the romantic experience I had with him. And I had very good romantic experience with him. I romanced him as a friend and I adored everything about his romance, maybe except the fact we were denied any non-sexual intimacy like kissing and hugging. This romance would feel more ace to me if it was allowing at least that, but overall I really enjoyed it. I was in my "still religiously indoctrinated to some extent" state, when I knew I was queer but were still acting and behaving as a straight person, so his religious preaching didn't bother me. It started bothering me way later when I finally rejected all the religious bullshit I was fed in my life and finally acknowledged my queerness fully, because to me Sebastian is just like me. He is a queer man, given to the Chantry, raised by it and due to that trapped in a religious system that limits his self-expression, and I really want him to be free. Nowadays, it bothers me when he preaches the Chantry doctrine, because it is too close to home with all the brainwashing I underwent in my very religious family. He reminds me of me, and it is kinda approaching the triggering trauma territory. I still like him very much, I just cannot ignore what he is saying anymore, because I had a person in my life who used the exact same religious reasoning as him to abuse me. So to me, he is abused by the Chantry, but he doesn’t see it yet, just like I didn’t see that I was abused before, and he in consequence continues to preach their doctrine in his own unique way, without realizing how damaging that can be as well. Anyway, coming back to the topic of this specific quote about “giving apostates to the Templars”. This banter also drives the point home that some of them really need either rewriting to fit the characters motivations or Hawke's direct intervention, because the things those characters can say to each other at times need either scolding or outside perspective why what they said is cruel or callous or dangerous. I already can see my first female mage Hawke turning back and looking at him as if he just said that we are going to go to the Alienage and murder all the elven kids. She would feel so conflicted, because she loves him, but he just said something that literally sounded like “I would put you all in gulag”. She was the Blue Hawke 100%, so she was only crass with Carver and I believe that this quote may have made her react in the same way she did to her brother’s more cruel and callous quotes. She would challenge him on what he just said, and depending on where Sebastian is in his religious indoctrination, he would either concede the point and realize what he said was wrong, or double down on it. I can actually imagine him to do the former, because he was open to criticizing the Chantry. If he knew all the shitty things that Circle did, maybe he would not think giving apostates to the Templars is a good idea or his religious duty as a citizen anymore. Hell, even Fenris is not into the idea in this specific banter. He specifically tells him to take it up with Hawke. He doesn’t agree to it, he doesn’t want any part in it. He may dislike Anders or Merrill on the principle of being mages, but he would not do such a thing, and I believe Sebastian would not either if he realized what that actually means, that it is not a lawful thing to do. How cruel that would be and how awfully it could end for all the apostates in the party, including mage Hawke if you played as such.
14 notes · View notes