#idk why i always feel the need to apologize like this | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mystellenia · 2 days

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ellie with a clumsy gf ୨ৎ

summary: how ellie cares for her clumsy girlfriend

content: nothing thats nsfw!! just ellie being a cutie concerned gf

notes: answer to this req!! SHES SO PUPU BABYGIRL IN THAT PIC I WANNA BITE HER JFWIBFJWKRJR. she's actually so beautiful i can't. entirely unrelated: idk how i feel about this... but i’m trying not to be like EW I HATE THIS FUCK THIS ITS SO BAD. like i dont even feel like that but we already know how i feel about this formatting. its growing on me tho

(wc 0.39k) so short i know guys i gotta dip my feet

constantly laughing but also concerned at how you manage to trip and bump and bruise yourself up on literal air

in apocalypse au, she's always been very aware of her surroundings bc of patrol and combat and stuff so she tries to keep you out of the way of things that she knows you'll bump into

always has an ice pack chilled and ready to go in the freezer in case you bump yourself real hard and it's sore because ice helps bumps not bruise right when you get them (looking at you guys clumsy ladies write that one down)

always warns you about things right as they're happening since you get into things SO FAST

like just as you're bumping into something or dropping an item she's blurting out, "wait! there's- a shirt on the floor"/"remember- that the washing machine door is open"/"baby, you're gonna drop that- just... like you did just now. you okay?"

always asks what you did to get a new bruise. she'll notice a new one and joke, "oh, what did you do this time?" and you'll respond, "i may have walked into the dishwasher while the door was down... but this one doesn't hurt that bad 😁" it's become like a little game

she's become sooo desensitized to any bump or bang sound in the house bc she knows its just you. not to say she doesn't care about you getting hurt--she immediately throws out a "you good?!" or "you need me?"--she just knows you know what to do: ice pack or heat compress. it's routine now.

read that low vitamin c levels make you bruise easily, so always has vitamin c rich snacks stocked up. oranges and strawberries and other fruits, always ready!

she's so stupid in love that she'll cut the fruits up into hearts or try nd make the most simple little animals with them from some mother of 3's tutorial on instagram reels and genuinely gets upset when she can't recreate them.

^ like you notice her absolutely maiming some apples and ask, "ummm why are you slicing and dicing that poor apple?" and she'll mumble, "it's supposed to be a stupid crab."

and for my ladies with darker skin where bruises aren't as visible or even just pale skin that just doesn't bruise easily, she's still just as concerned. and since there is no visible warning of a sore spot, she's hurriedly apologizing after pressing on a sore spot or laying on a tender patch.

@abbysbug @picklesarenice69

hello to my clitter critters. soooooooo erm sorry about going like basically inactive for like 2 weeks i got into the fight of a lifetime with my mother 😊 we still beefing 😊 dw tho when she's old and wrinkly i’ll have power of attorney and trust the cord WILL be plugged.

like i’m joking but as of now that bitch is an opp fr

but anywhoooo i’m back. and my dinosaur of a laptop had a health scare and i thought i was gonna have to plan a funeral for her but she went to the doctor (apple store) and she's all better. idk how it still works so well now bc my mom got this when obama was still president 😆 don't y'all worry tho this motherboard does nothing but purr we chillin (the fan turns on whenever there are too many graphics moving)

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stars-n-spice · 3 days

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Silly Squad Alignment Charts

Because I thought it would be fun and silly :)

Find out more about the Silly Squad here!

Of course, have to start with the classic:

Hunter will say they have food at home and it's literally like probably two slices of bread, a bottle of ketchup, and a head of lettuce

Viram KNOWS how to cook so you best be happy to eat her food instead of having Mcdonalds

Khea and Echo it depends on their mood whether they pull up and order a single black coffee before leaving (Echo would never do it if Omega is in the car)

Crosshair doesn't even like their coffee but he does it to be a little shit

Feel like Tech is also kinda in the middle because he'll be like "Technically we have food at home-" but he also needs his caffeine

Phee will ALWAYS pull up to the Mcdonalds, especially when Omega's with her. Then Omega always holds it over Hunter- "Well, PHEE takes ME to Mcdonalds!"

Tay is the definition of a bastard (no seriously)

Phee is bastard (affectionate) but would technically be more of "Badass" than anything

Khea, Crosshair, and Tech are the Bitch Trio and if you put them in a room together they WILL tear each other apart (emotionally most likely but Tech will goad Crosshair and Khea into physically fighting each other while he records)

Majority of the squad is Babey though

Echo is also "Bad Ass" but he could also be a Bitch if he wanted

Hunter is Bastard just because I think it's funny

Dumb Bitch Hunter my beloved <3

Echo is sad dick because he has no dick

I use dumb affectionately with Wrecker (not with Hunter and Tay)

Tech just has big dick energy to me idk

Khea's a sad hoe but she'll never admit to it (the being sad part)

If you've noticed, I really like making fun of Hunter that's why he's there in the dumbass squared category

Wrecker, Khea, and Phee are all smart as fuck but have more fun pretending that they aren't really

Tay is good at pretending that he is smart - he is not

Then of course, Tech, Cross, and Echo are all smartasses

This fit so perfectly I was dying

Hunter is laughing nervously because he's aroace lmao

Omega would be like "Thanks! :D" and just carry on

Jung would most likely do *thumbs up* instead of finger guns though

When you pair up the couples, it's funnier

If Tay said "I know" after Cross told him that he loved him, Crosshair would dump him on the spot

Khea tells Wrecker she loves him for the first time and he short circuits and probably would say something along the lines of "YEET!"

Viram and Echo both have issues and would not be able to comprehend why someone would love them - I'm sure Echo's got insecurities and Viram knows she's a workaholic and therefore difficult to be in a relationship so she apologies in advance

If Phee told Tech she loved him and he went "a horrible decision, really" she'd probably laugh

And of course, who doesn't love Phee? If you don't, get out of here.

Crosshair could care less, he ain't dealing with that shit

Tech would say this ominously as if he's seen the future and knows your death is imminent meanwhile Khea's is more of a - "you probably will because everyone close to me has already died" sort of way :/

I feel like Omega might also be "i'd die for you first" too

Hunter, Viram, and Echo don't want to deal with that shit either, they've already got so much loss, guilt, and other things on their plate

Tay's probably not listening when someone tells him they'd die for him while Phee's like, "Oh, neat. Anyways, as I was saying about my last adventure-"

Jung is ready and willing to put his life on the line and Wrecker would probably more like a "Nu uh" because he's got your back and would look out for you

Phee will also do it for some credits or a cool treasure

Tay is going to fight god (and he's going to lose)

Tech could do so much more than take down the government, but he needs incentives (him and Phee can take down the government together <3)

Khea is a bounty hunter, her job literally requires her to stab people sometimes in order for her to get money

Crosshair would stab without anyone needing to ask him

Echo's taking down the government no matter what, but especially if Rex asks him to come along

Jung is going to fight god if you ask them to (and he'll win)

Viram is the type of friend who is an excellent tutor and you end up understanding the concept after getting her help meanwhile Omega will explain what she knows and then the homework becomes a group project of figuring out what the fuck it's asking

You can copy Hunter's homework but there is no guarantee that the answers are right (most of them are wrong)

You can copy Jung's homework and there's a high chance the answers are right

Khea had better things to do than homework - like get frustrated over it and cry for a bit before giving up on it

Phee did some of the homework but she'll only help you out if you give her something in exchange

Wrecker and Tay, beloved himbos, they had no idea and even if they did do the homework, you wouldn't want to copy off of them

Crosshair also didn't do the homework but he also doesn't want to respond

Tech and Echo both did the homework and it's correct but they don't tolerate copying work to even have suggested it is offensive so now you're left on read

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tariah23 · 29 days

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Well, I’m still glad that Gojo was always a character who was growing and learning at least. He’s literally one of my favorite characters of all time now. Like, he’s never been as perfect as how the fans would make him out to be despite canonically being viewed as an absolute nuisance to everyone around him (I don’t think his peers necessarily hate him but a lot of them probably hate to see him coming and the ones who’ve dealt with him long enough to consider him a friend, tolerate him and groan whenever he opens his mouth, too 😭… out of love. He’s extremely childish so there is only sm the other adults around him can take and to an extent, his students. I think the only characters in canon who adore him and their eye’s sparkle whenever he’s around, and being a silly teacher was Yuuji and Miwa (she asked him for his autograph (he’s the most famous sorcerer in the jjk world) and when she was alone, she did a little dance in the empty hallway 🥺…) from what we’ve seen even though the others still care about him, too. They just find him rather annoying, which he most definitely is. And he does it on purpose. He plays too much.)

#I’m also not usually one to get annoyed whenever ppl shit on the things I like #like I’m an adult sorry idc 😵‍💫#but it’s always annoying seeing ppl who know nothing about the story complaining about it #even just as recently with the Gojo being racist shit 😭..#like he’s a really great character despite all of that and even though Gege’s #execution of that could’ve been better or didn’t need to happen at all #because idk what gege was doing even though I do strongly believe that he used a moment like this to showcase Gojo’s ignorance and #that how he’s also human and makes mistakes since if you’re familiar with the series Gojo isn’t really treated like person at all #more like a deity and he doesn’t like that #but he’s never been one to voice his personal feelings and talk about his trauma ever #he gets treated like a god and because of this he’s never felt like he could truly connect with other people #so that’s why he puts on that whole act of being overly friendly/ playing with others and even rude to shut others out because of his #aversion to opening his traumatized self To other ppl like he’s so cool #and when he’s friendly he gives the others just enough of his affection so that he wouldn’t be worried about and not have others pry #but he’s incredibly flawed as well #I feel like gege could’ve showed Gojo being ‘humbled’ some other kind of way over the racism tho 😭. But it’s fine lmfao #I’m still so grateful that he had Gojo actually apologize instead of waving Miguel off like he didn’t matter because like I’ve said before #he literally never apologizes (this is probably the first time that I’ve ever seen gojo apologize to anyone in canon I’m so serious 🗿)#that’s literally not part of him #like he feels regret but he never apologies or shows that he actually cares about what others are expressing to him when they’re upset with #him. like this is crazy. but it shows that he did care about the mistake that he made which I appreciate…. like idk how I would’ve felt #about his character if he showed that he could care less when hurting someone like this🗿…..#I adore him so much sorry sorry for taking about anime I’m just 😭…. ❤️❤️❤️#rambling #I’m glad that everyone is fucking with Miguel now because he is a really interesting character even though we haven’t seen much of him #he’s one of the few ppl who Gojo trusted enough to look after someone who he cared about despite the horrors #because he knew that Miguel would protect yuuta and do right by him #it’s very 😭❤️…

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kenzie-ann27 · 6 months

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meanwhile my experience with being asexual is just like. constant self hatred and apologizing about it

#it's just. idk it's ace week and no one is talking about it #and i go in the tags and it's just. ace culture is basically all memes #and it's fine but like. i enjoy having serious conversations about it #i never get to talk about it because it's such a non thing #ace culture is like it's filling the hole that comes from not having a sexuality with jokes about bread and cake and dragons for some reason #but like. i want to talk about how sad and lonely it is a lot of the time. but it's a thing where it feels so self imposed #like of course no one wants to be romantic with me in any sense when i am so awkward from past trauma #combined with the fact that i will never be able to give them what they actually are aiming for #like. high school was fucking miserable.#i mean i'm already crying so why not make it worse here #it's just. i feel like i am missing out on so much and i hate that i am made to feel like this #and no one fucking takes me seriously when i try to talk about it #it's a big part of who i am and it's always a shadow because it just doesn't matter #i just... i want people to see the beauty not in filling that void with other memey shit and just. acknowledge the void #internally and externally and in every way possible being asexual is so crushingly lonely and no one ever talks about it #we're not in ba sing se we can talk about it please #and now i will apologize #and i will lay down because i have a headache and i need to calm down

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flutt3rb4tz · 2 days

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aaaa. i wish my friends would actually act like friends. and. invite me to play games with them sometimes instead of excluding me or making the game harder for me to play (i have really bad tech anxiety and they like forcing mods on ppl)..

i js.. wanna play vidy game.. and hang out.. but all they play are mmos im too scared to/just cannot join in on (shitty laptop) or modded games that scare the shit out of me!!! why cant i hang out with my friends and why do they never think to invite me. i dont even try making it hard all ive told them is that downloading mods gives me panic attacks

#💔 needs recharging #n like. ive told them id love to just join them with casual games #no modding or anything. just vanilla #or even for them to try being gentle w/ me #abt mods!!#but no!!!! they just push it or exclude me altogether #it feels so targeted and unfair sometimes #bcs its usually only me (or my bf)#that they leave out #its never eachother!! and when it is they always apologize and move shit around to change that #but why not? for... us?#idk. feels bad man #theyre good friends and r very fun to chat with its just so hard #to do anything with them sometimes #(looks at that time they chose a game that was clearly putting me in sensory overload and didnt even care when i melted down and left)#im very frustrated. sorry.

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rhodey-rhudert-rhodes · 4 months

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Wanted to make a post dunking on an idiot who seems to think using the word "genocide" for anything other than the holocaust is disgraceful, then took a look at Wikipedia for some fact checking and got too depressed and sad to do it

#tw genocide #tw death #idk why it feels like this one needs more trigger warnings than usual #tw mass murder #i always thought the holocaust death count (the 5-7m number) included everyone not just the jewish people killed...turns out there's #different counter for the genocide of romani and polish people... also there were apparently 3 million russian POW who got killed that I've #NEVER heard about before. and that's just the stuff i discovered abt the holocaust #the Armenian genocide killed nearly 90% of Armenians in the ottoman empire (i don't think turkey has issued an official apology for that OR #the greek genocide). and you'd think with how many circassians there is where i live I'd've known 97% of them were killed or deported #i get why the idiot i wanted to post about thinks that nazis were “uniquely evil” bc the truth is uhhhhhh much worse #also i think the 2 wikipedia pages on genocides and ethnic cleansings use wildly different sources bc the numbers are all other place

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aahsoka · 1 year

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i know teaching kids is hard but i kinda dont like seeing ur video content about the kid in class who always ‘acts like you’re picking on them’ like i know ur tired but maybe you should figure out why they feel singled out like that idk man.

#jordan talks #and the COMMENTS #‘their parents didnt raise them right’ ‘they need to get taken out of class until their psychological issues are addressed’#‘why dont kids these days want to learn’#why the fuck do u think #you guys care way more about disciplining kids than teaching them sometimes i stg #certainly i think smaller class sizes could help and teachers should be paid more etc etc #but that is a CHILD they do not have the emotional intelligence you have #do they teach anything useful in education programs #idk of course the kid ur making videos about feels singled out clearly theyre living rent free in ur mind #i GET that you dont always see all the other kids goofing off but like #you can be like ‘sorry you were the only one i saw’ and like address everyone asking they behave as u continue #idk man . learn how to apologize to kids at LEAST

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astranva · 1 year

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“nova sorry if this is weird but i just want to ask…” hush, my love. what’s wrong? why are you apologizing? who broke you? i’m tucking you in bed and i’ll get you some warm soup

#i always feel like crying whenever you start your asks with that #because what are you apologizing to me for #you’re just asking something #about a fic or whatever #why would i get mad #you’re so adorable #idk what’s happening in your life that makes you feel like you should apologize #but you don’t need to do that here when you’re asking something #💖

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theloveinc · 2 years

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I think if u ever made a blog that is just all ur hot takes and rants that could start a riot thatd be so sexie of u. i think that would be so cool bc UR so cool and i live to see u being petty and opinionated lol. legend shit 🤞

LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOO anon, please!!! you're too kind, come here and give me a kiss :(((

thinking about it... i'd actually honestly LOVE to, but part of me is a little bit scared thinking about it cuz i'd hate to feel like i was being "tWo FaCeD" or whatever given that i currently try so hard not to rock the boat............

but this is making laugh tbh... and i appreciate ur interest (and humor tee hee) A LOT. i just might end up having to given that... i've been having so much fun using this one that i know i'll end up missing the freedom when i most likely... move blogs/whatever i end up doing.

obvs i'd only drop the the name to select people tho (you being the first one)😈... but maybe i should just start collecting all my thoughts now LOL, dunno.

til then, love u forever and ever AND lots and lots. i'd kill and die for u, anon. for realsies🤧❤️

#i wrote a whole 6 paragraph response to this that tumblr DELETED #so if this seems half *ssed... thats why and i apologize #its fine tho i realized when i was trying to retype it all that most of it was needless #but still idk #i have weird thoughts on it all #i'd be really devastated to feel like... all the work i spent creating the ihatebnha persona was for naught u know?#if people turned on me for ... suddenly not being the person that i've always 'been' on here #but i wonder like. why am i that concerned #i already fundamentally believe that action > opinion and #truly nothing i think could really be that revolutionary bc im sure theres people who'd agree #(like u)#but still #it would be a betrayal of sorts </33333333 #it always is #but its not like other people on this site give af abt being rude #so whatever #i just need to stop stressing and be kind to myself and appreciate ppl like u #instead of the potential haters who don't even exist yet #sooooo thank u again for this #it made me laugh #sorry i took it a bit seriously instead of being funny like u but #i yam grateful EEEE #ur the real legend sh*t tbh #okay leaving now before i waste anymore time but ur cool too BYE #caitie answers

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thefunniestguy · 2 years

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Watching romance is both great and awful bc- it's so cute when it's well done !! It makes me so happy !!! I get immersed and it makes me feel like I'm the one falling in love !!!!! And then the episode ends and I sit wondering if I'll ever know what they feel like-

#YES this is about heartstopper #even if i did fall in love !! what if i fall for a girl ? as an afab person my parents woulllld kill me #but idk if i CAN feel romantic attraction #i want to !! i want to so bad !!!!#i wanna kiss girls ! guys ! everyone in between !! idc man i just wanna kiss !!!!! to fall in love !!#is it a matter of the right person coming along ??? timing ?????? or is there /never/ going to be a right person??#a lot of this did in fact stem from nick saying smth along the lines of 'i love liking you' and i realized #i for sure use the word 'love' too lightly and frequently #i always mean it tho..??? i love everyone. just platonically ofc #but theres times where ive told a friend i love them and then made it all awkward-#even when adding '/p' its awkward and weird and idk aaaaaaaaa #is that bc i dont get the weight of love ? bc i dont understand what it can mean outside of platonic ??? or just bc im ??? ???? ??????????#idk bestie idk aaaa #BUT if i have crushes on actors and canonmates does that mean im NOT aro/cupioromantic ????#sexuality is a hellhole of confusion hhh this is why ive cried so many tears over nick #finn's fun #simon says #im both very much finn and simon rn so theres a huge mix of. me as finn remembering how desperate i was for love for a while #(which i regret and genuinely shouldnt have done- i was a wad to FP and donked it up. i needed to just apologize and work on being better)#and as simon i just. miss betty . memories from as simon are the main way i feel love romantically <//3 but it sucks bc betty isnt here #(not that if i find a betty ill immediately be in love or want to date- ofc not /srs)#vent

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poppyseed799 · 10 months

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I feel like 80% of arguments I’ve had with my sister could be avoided if she just changed how she views apologies tbh. For some reason she acts like you ONLY need to apologize if you are 100% in the wrong and the person you’re apologizing to is 100% innocent. That’s… not true. Why does she act like this.

#one time my other sister did something that upset me but she couldn’t have known it would upset me. she apologized tho cuz it upset me.#THEN THIS SISTER IN THE POST TOOK BACK HER APOLOGY???? BUDDY THAT WASNT EVEN UR APOLOGY YOU CANT TAKE IT BACK FOR HER #BECAUSE ‘you don’t need to apologize for that it’s POPPYS fault for not SAYING it would upset her’ like WHAAATTT??????#then accusing me of like… GUILT TRIPPING HER INTO APOLOGIZING???? WHEN I LITERALLY DIDNT ASK FOR AN APOLOGY???? I WAS JUST UPSET????#then proceeded to try to guilt trip us for saying she was wrong to take back someone else’s apology. like maybe she wasn’t consciously guilt #tripping us (I doubt it) but it was just very hypocritical feeling to me.#(WHEN I SAID I DOUBT IT I MEANT THAT SHE PROBABLY DIDNT MEAN IT BTW I WORDED THAT AWFULLY)#also she refuses to apologize if it’s not 100% her fault and this causes sooo many issues to escalate cuz she’s AGRESSIVE about it.#if she bumps into you don’t expect an apology expect a rudely toned ‘why were you walking there when I was clearly walking there’#idk I swear she hates me. I always feel so awkward around her partner cuz idk what they talk about but I don’t doubt she might be saying bad #things about me to them. even tho like. I’m usually only about 30% in the wrong.#anyways kids. apologize when you upset someone even if it’s not fully your fault. that’s just how it works. it’s not that deep.#and don’t take back other people’s apologies lmao that was sooo weird

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inkskinned · 6 months

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it's hard to explain because inevitably you sound like an asshole, but some people are allowed to lose their temper, lose their mind - you're not, though.

when your friend never texts you first and misses your birthday and never makes an effort; you don't mind. you know she's struggling, and you want her to get the help that she deserves. you give her every excuse and every chance.

it shouldn't matter to you so much that people are always coming through for her. you want her to be happy, you love it for her. you love that her community rises up to the occasion. why does it bother you that when she snaps at someone, says horrible mean things - but two hours later, everyone is comforting her while she's crying. you know she's stressed. why do you kind of hate that she is welcomed back to her job, that her parents are endlessly wiring her money.

and you're - fuck, are you envious?

but when you don't text back, someone sits you down and says i know you're struggling, but you're being a bad friend. when you're too numb to show up for work, your boss just shakes his head. i'm sorry. i can't approve more time off. we have the company to protect. when you finally snap back at your family for making that shitty comment again, you're forced to apologize for being too sensitive.

god forbid you need something. people aren't used to you being the one asking. you're the giver like the book you hated; your pages all open and rumpled. you always have the answer, always have the solution. you are reliable, trustworthy. people like you don't struggle with things. you're supposed to be lifted by tragedy. you are given a maximum of 24 hours to grieve, and then you need to just behave at the party.

you can't read the giving tree without feeling like crying, and even that feels like it's too much emotion. like, nobody looks at you and assumes you're the tree; they'd name five other people before even considering you in the running. you're just there, never-asking.

your friend gets to say mean shit, that's just her personality. when you make a snide comment, you're just being petty. people laugh when your friend stands you up for another event; they say she's just like that. you were 5 minutes late to a meeting with friends and they were mad about it for the rest of the evening. your friend sets everything on fire; everyone applauds her through the ashes. you so much as light a candle: and suddenly now you're an arsonist.

you don't want your friend to suffer, though. the thing is that you just wish that the empathy and kindness your friend gets - you wish you had that option, that everyone offered you grace and money and a gentle reception.

the other day you were fighting down the bad urge; the void call, the end note. you tried-anyway. you went to the family event, tried laughing at the right moments. nodded and smiled and all of it. one of your siblings threw a fit, but she's allowed to, so everyone just rolled their eyes about it. you took 3 whole minutes to stand outside when you got overwhelmed. you literally set a timer about it.

in the morning you woke up to a text from your parents: you were a complete disgrace last night. idk what your attitude problem is, but you really need to fix it.

#writeblr #eldest daughter syndrome #tbh

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causticsunshine · 1 year

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#okay fic is still going live @ 9 apologies i didn’t have time to do a big super thorough edit because #(oh that’s 9am pst whoops)#the last scene took me hours to finish….. like i worked on it from 3pm to 1:30am #and called work asking if i could come in at 7:30 instead of 5:30 only to learn that our dept head called off #fully knowing our lead is on vacation #so ofc bc we’re always slammed on mondays i got worried and then proceeded to not get a wink of sleep !#and now i can’t call out either bc we need a morning lead and idk if i’ll be able to leave when our closing lead comes in @ noon…..#ik it’s because i didn’t sleep and was stressed about getting the fic done on time but i literally feel so sick and #i’ve already cried like. twice since getting out of bed an hour ago #wish me luck today….. also i will give the fic a hard edit over the next few days so if it looks slightly more polished and #any small sections appear that’s why #if you still want to read in the meantime though ty ily and i hope it’s enjoyable enough i really tried 🥺#as always it just got away from me yk im wordy and it’s kind of my downfall 😞😞#anyway yeah hope it’s still an ok read and flows decently #alex talks

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amatres · 1 year

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was very tempted after getting fenris romance successfully activated to pull the then romance anders route bc the banter is hilarious to me

#i just find it fun but also i like committing and allyn is the type of person who wouldn't move on quickly so that fun timeline is lost #the banter for it is insane tho i love it #i also went through the gauntlet trying to get that romance to activate. i didnt have enough approval at first to activate question beliefs #so i couldnt unlock the flirt option after bitter pill in the estate and i thought it was a bug #once i gave up and was like 'well anders was really tempting me anyway' i noticed the quest activated and was like 'oh. well lol'#i think it fits tho they were nice enough to each other but another person said the apology he gives after bitter pill #is like a relationship level up and that being his turning point to start developing feelings for a mage hawke feels appropriate #idk if ill keep fenris as a canon romance for her but its an interesting look into the romance i think #i also realized why i had the false memory of hawke being able to say 'i understand' when he breaks up with them #is bc they can say 'i understood. i always understood.' in act three to get back together #anyway this is a lot of tags im going to stop rambling now #dragon age #dragon age 2 #if you need a tag let me know #i just find the interpersonal drama you can create in da2 so interesting and also hilarious

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mrfoox · 1 year

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'when someone gets mad at me especially girls in the way where they want space/want to be alone... I get all clingy and lovely dovely bc im scared of them leaving me. That's because of my abandonet issues I for from my mom'

Me: hmm... Yeah i.. I might have something akin to that bc of my dad problems

'oh yeah, how?'

Me: uuuh idk

Me in reality when anyone treats me slightly different, ignores me or seem mad/sad/upset with me or for any reason: I'm sorry. It's all my fault, I should be ashamed I'm so sorry please tell me what I can do to atone? -mad anxiety and possibly sobbing-no please I'm sorry, I know I should not have said that before, its that why you're mad, right? I'm sorry please

#miranda talking shit #Idk if i have abandonment issues honestly like maybe... I just know as soon as someone acts differently ... My brain immediately goes there #And its extreme and i act so pathetic and i probably scare people with it. My brain immediately goes to the extreme thaf i did something #And they will be mad at me or hate me so i apologize all the time. My brain does have systems set up to uh #Protect me from things though. Aka i always expect that sooner or later people will grow tired of me and leave. So though i get super #Attached i never... Ive never allowed myself to get attached to the point i think theh wont leave me. So i dont have any #Expectations on anyone and so they wont let me down... My brain just tells me i am always at fault and need to feel bad and make it up to #Others... If you ever talk to me and you think im annoying by apologizing for something minor... Trust me #I can be a lot worse /: ive been trying to work on this but still i just ... If i dont tell anyone i still think this. Im always waiting #To hear others say ive disspointed them and fucked up etc. Logically i know that uh. Often it dont have anything to do about me #And when it is... Its part of life we hurt and get hurt and we forgive and so on but yeah no. Still get such intense panic and despair #When anyone seem different. Raising their voice at me or being abrupt in their answers I have to intensely fight myself to not #Break down and ask for forgiveness and shit /:#Negative #My trauma have definitely made me in this way and i hate it and i always feel like im being manipulating i hate it #I cant take rejection. Or well i can i do all the time that's why i always assume i will be but i end up taking it so badly its embarrassin

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