#its crazy 2 look back on old posts and see how i used to ask

[miserycanary]

A FIXED HEART IN YOUR HAND ᡣ𐭩 previous ⤶

♡⃛ ‘My Hell For Your Love’ alternative ending

pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley & fem!reader

synopsis: is it done? hopeless love? How Ghost is after the break-up

tags: :3.. 

Ghost swears he’s going crazy. In his eyes, the walls are dimmer and everything seems… out of place. He seems out of place. Not when you’re not there with him. “Fuck,” he grumbles, tilting his head back on the headboard of the bed you used to share with him. He knows it’s disgusting but he hasn’t had the courage to change the bedsheets since that day, too scared he’d forget how you smell. Ever since you came over for the last time to take your things, he lost everything in the apartment that reminds him of you— that reminds you guys happened. 

It seems like he’s in a worse state than he thought when even Price came up to him, asking him to hang after work shifts. Ghost knew that he was not in the best state and everyone in the base was muttering about it. Seeing as he had nothing more to lose (you were all he had), he agreed. 

The bar was filled with cigar smoke and the smell of cheap liquor. It was bustling with bodies grinding on each other everywhere. He had let himself go but his build still managed to attract stares, often getting hit on by ladies looking for someone to fix their daddy issues. And each time he turns them down until he sees a familiar figure. Like a dog, he chases someone who seems to be you but only to feel a pang of disappointment. 

The night seems to pass quickly. He’s suddenly in bed with the girl who looks like you. He knows it’s wrong to play with her, but he needs you— one way or another. It just ended up with him more frustrated. She wasn’t like you. The way she felt, her look, and her voice. Everything was so different. 

He didn’t even stay the night, unable to process the fact he laid with someone who wasn’t you. Placing some bills on the bedside table, Ghost takes one more look at her sleeping figure that paints a scowl on his face. Even the way she sleeps wasn’t like you at all. The walk back home was exhausting, with a cigar between his lips and a burden in his heart. 

His steps halted when he found himself in the familiar street of your unit. “I’m really going nuts,” he chuckled to himself, peering up to look at your unit that always had its windows open. He was about to risk it all when he heard your laughter and a voice. The sight before him made him lose it. You had a guy over. Someone who doesn’t even look like him! Ghost snaps back when he realizes he let go of his cigar. Looking down at the still burning light, he contemplated. Was it done? Were you gone from him forever? No, right? It’s a one-night stand, convinces himself.

It wasn’t a one-night stand, he realizes. Holding the wedding invitation in his hand 2 years after that. The words printed on the dedication had his stomach churning. 

‘To my old friend, Simon,

I invite you to my wedding. Thank you for being with me for many years. You have helped me become who I am today, so I would love if you’ll be there. We promised we’d be with each other during our happiest moment, right? 

All love,

Y/N’

꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱: the last and final part. Go read the alternative ending! Sorry if it’s rushed!!

dividers by @cafekitsune

Please reblog!! Ask is open!

⟢ taglist is open! Comment if you want to be tagged in the next posts.

check out my other works in the masterlist: ୭!

#simon ghost x you #simon riley cod #simon ghost x reader #ghost x reader #simon ghost riley #cod x reader #cod modern warfare #cod mw2 #simon riley call of duty #ghost riley #simon riley x you #simon riley x reader #ghost x you #ghost cod #canary’s melodies #RUSHED #simon riley #ghost angst

[deblklesb]

[I Want You So Bad — Ellie x Reader, Pt. 1]

[AFAB!reader, friends to lovers, fluff MDNI] (part 2 here)

Summary: Ellie likes you so much, and it's crazy how you don't even notice it.

a/n: omg i finally did it!!!! it took me too long, so sorry anon, but it's finally here!! its a two part thing, I'll post part2 soon! hope you enjoy it, please let me know if you do!

cw: fluff and pining. as always i don't want minors interacting.

not proof read | reblogs are highly appreciated

It's a painfully hot day in Jackson, Ellie is wondering how Shimmer is doing down in the barn and contemplating about going there to spend some time with her beloved horse. The sun gives everything an extra glimmer and the roads hold small puddles of fata morganas, amusing her as always - astronomy it's her main target of curiosity but physics it's there too.

While she fixes her shoelaces and checks her pockets for the keys, she also looks at the small handmade candy wrapped in a simple paper, standing on the bench next to her door. The grocery brings back delightful memories of when you runned up to her with the cutest smile, a hand in her direction.

"Ellie, I made this candy from a recipe I found in one of those books, took some for you", you had no idea how that gesture reached the Williams girl right into the heart.

"Oh, thanks…!" She looked down at the brownish treat. It seemed to be so tasteful and you were known amongst your friends to be a very talented cook.

"So, are you coming to the Tipsy Bison tonight?" You put your hands in your back pockets. Ellie could only see a part of your tattoo coming out of your short sleeve, wondering what the entirety of it would look like.

"Uh, yeah, I guess. If I can finish all my tasks", she would definitely drop them if that meant to see you.

"Okay, cool! See ya later, then", and just like that you left with a small wave and a sweet smile.

Inside, Ellie beat herself up for not asking something like "oh do you want me there?" to slightly make a move and test the waters. You would always leave her speechless, lagging, absolutely fumbling on her words to even put a goof full sentence out.

On this incredibly hot day, she thinks it's finally the time to maybe taste your candy. She hasn't done it yet because… Maybe because she was holding onto the mere fact that you thought about her and went out of your way to give her some handmade candy. It was such a sweet act, it made her daydream for days and literally kick her feet when laying on her bed that night, thinking about your pretty eyes and cute lips.

Deciding to save for that night, she finally heads out to the hot weather and bright sun. The sunglasses she found on a supply run unfortunately were broken, she could make good use of them now.

It didn't take long to reach the barns, the shadow of the roof presenting a hope to cool down. The horses seemed to not mind the heat that much, and today was bathing day.

"Morning, Els", Pedro, a 15 year-old boy waved at her. She smiled back, finally facing Shimmer on her usual spot. But the horse wasn't alone.

In the barn, a brush in hand, stands you. Mindlessly stroking Shimmer's fur in circles, your back is not fully out since you're still with a tank on but Ellie can finally see the rest of your tattoo; it's a big tiger, an image mostly on your back with just a paw sticking on your front, under the clavicle - the part Ellie could always see. Today, it moves as your muscles do the same and you murmur a random melody, eyes careful to put the attention on the horse's fur.

The brunette has to take a deep breath before proceeding into the barn, trying to pull out that chill, laid back facade to hide the way you make her almost melt into a puddle.

"Hey, see you got up early today" She has you stopping on your tracks to look over your shoulder, immediately smiling fondly when seeing her.

"Yeah, I got the bathing job today so I didn't want to leave it until later", dirt falls from Shimmer's fur as you brush it. She's not the dirtiest one usually, but after some runs between the last bath and this one a significant amount of dirt is coming off. "Where have you been putting her to, by the way?"

"Oh, we found an old ranch somewhere west and I decided to let her run around a bit. It made a big cloud of dirt around her", Ellie chuckles as she gets closer from the horse, patting her neck. "This big girl enjoyed herself very much"

"Well, that's good, though", you go back into looking straight to your front, oblivious to how Ellie's gaze falls on your tranquil figure.

She captures the bridge of your nose and your adorable cheeks, the ones she just wanna kiss all the time so badly. Your hair, away from your face today, your attractive lips and the prettiest eyes she has ever seen. With your back to the barn's door, you almost glow in front of the light coming from outside. Like a divine vision, straight out of a fantasy book, demanding to be worshiped by the auburn haired girl. She feels her chest tightening and that feeling spreading to her arms and stomach, like it always does when she's around you; a visceral need to touch you in any possible way.

Shimmer ruffs and bumps her snout into Ellie's face, almost like she's calling her back to Earth.

"Easy", Ellie chuckles again, now trying to hide the last moment. From who? She doesn't know, there's just you, her and the horses here, but she feels so exposed whenever she's around you.

"It might sound crazy, but I do believe these horses have personality", you suddenly comment, turning to grab a comb.

"Right?! Oh, Jesse keeps saying I am crazy, that they're just horses, but I do feel this too! One time Shimmer laughed when she saw me fall. Like, a horse laugh, but I swear it was a laugh", and just like that, Ellie's loosening up.

Your laugh fills the space as you stand next to Shimmer to comb her black tail. Now facing your back again, Ellie takes in how your back muscles press your dark tank top and how your waist seems to call her hands to grab it, hold you from behind close to her chest. The desire to have your scent consuming her mind is so strong, she thinks she might actually pass out.

This is getting so out of hand.

"So", she clears her throat, looking around for another comb to work on Shimmer's mane. "Are you going to be here all day?"

"Tipsy Bison at six", you don't even care to look back at her, focused on the tail.

"Do you ever sleep?"

"Yeah, very well, actually", you chuckle. "Tomorrow I have nothing in the morning, so I can compensate"

"Oh… I thought we could, y'know…", she's trying to collect the millions of thoughts running around her mind at the same time, trying to not fuck this up. "Have a sleepover one of those nights… When you're free, I mean… But we don't have to if you don't want it- it was just an idea"

"It's a great idea!" The way you smile, turning to look at her, has her heart clenching. It's so genuine and sweet, just like you always do whenever you see her coming around and go compliment her. Do you even know the way she loses balance at each one of those acts? "The last sleepover was so long ago. We should call Dina and Jesse too"

"Yeah, absolutely", she rests her head on Shimmer's neck when you turn your attention to the tail again, cursing silently.

The rest of Shimmer's bath was calm, you both kept talking about whatever. At one point, when Ellie was rinsing the horse's back legs, Shimmer just threw her tail on the girl's face, making you laugh out loud and the auburn haired girl look stunned.

In the end you both got out a little cooled down due to splashes of water, past midday after bathing all horses. It was easier with two people, after all.

"So, I guess I'll let you get going to change and go to work…"

"Aren't you coming to the Bison tonight?"

"Oh, yeah, I guess I'll pass by", she tried to sound chill and nonchalant, not revealing how she always planned to go there as long as she wasn't patrolling.

"Okay, see you there then!" And you fucking leaned to kiss her on the cheek, smiling while you waved goodbye and turned in your street, leaving Ellie dumbfounded.

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

If a stare could create holes, Jesse and Dina would cause trypophobia in anyone. Ellie was sitting across from them on the table, holding a beer bottle so tightly that it could break at any giving moment. Standing next to the table was you, listening to their shitty excuses about not being able to attend to the sleepover, oblivious to their real intentions.

"Oh, I get it, it's fine. Guess it'll be just me and Ellie then", you shrug, smiling to the auburn haired girl. She smiles back immediately under your gaze. "We'll, I have to go back to behind the counter, go talk to me if y'all need anything"

And she stares at your back while you walk away, always looking so fine while handling the objects behind the long wooden table.

"You're welcome, by the way", it's Jesse who says it, smirking.

"I'd beat the shit out of you if we weren't in public", she groans, rolling her eyes.

"Oh, come on! It will be nice having her all by yourself for a night, uh? Then you can silently pin over her while pretending to pay attention to some random ass movie", Dina is looking up like she's pondering the scenario.

"Shut up", her hands start to sweat with anticipation, all the possibilities running through her mind.

What you'll be wearing, what you both will watch, if you are going to sleep next to her, if she'll be able to hold you close absolutely in a friendly way, if you'll laugh and have a good time with her. Ellie thinks about the tragedies implicated in being alone with you for the whole night, how embarrassing it can be, how she'll combust just by looking at you so closely, yet, so far.

"Stop overthinking. Just wear those flannels, she likes it"

"No, she does not!" Her face warms up, because of the alcohol, of course.

"She already complimented you ten times about that shirt", Jesse points out.

It was true, though. And each and every time, Ellie almost melted into a puddle in front of your chaste gaze. If you only knew what ran through her mind when she looked at you…

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

This was messy, and Ellie didn't know what to do anymore.

At some point of the night, you decided to play a game and Ellie just agreed - because what could go wrong? Not going far from the known route, you opted for a Q&A game in which each one asked a question and the other one had to answer it or respond with another question. It would be nice and silly, if the given situation wasn't hard enough for Ellie.

You were sitting in front of her, legs crossed on the couch, in a tank top and the smallest shorts Ellie has ever seen you on - which was cool, it was okay, she could manage that because she was already used to holding her shit together next to you. But everytime you moved around, for some reason, that night, she just wanted to pull you close once and for all. An inexplicable energy was emerging from the whole situation and she couldn't grasp it properly, but it made her restless.

Her hands tingle whenever you lightly hold her arm or her leg, she starts to wonder why you were so touchy generally, but tonight more than ever. An indescribable feeling comes from her guts each time you laugh and lean on. She might as well be going crazy.

So, it was already hard enough. But then you asked her if she was currently into some girl around town and that was the first time Ellie responded with another question.

"Why do you wanna know?" It sounded like she was caught off guard, and that bought your attention.

"I was just curious… But your answer makes me think that you actually are", you smirk, playful.

"I didn't say I was"

"Didn't say you weren't either", damn you for being clever.

"But that doesn't mean anything…" The auburn haired girl looked away, resting her arm on the back of the couch.

"Is it Dana?"

"No" Dana was another woman that regularly worked on the Tipsy Bison. She was pretty and polite, but Ellie wasn't interested in her - not with you around. And she was so desperate to direct the conversation somewhere else that she missed the way your voice changed.

"So there is someone, it's just not Dana?"

"Why are you so interested?"

Why were you so interested? It was because of the game, right? Your only concern now was the fact that Ellie didn't answer your initial question, so you had to dig to the bottom of this topic. That sudden sting on your stomach when thinking about Ellie pining over Dana was just the prospect of your close friend having a crush on your coworker and not telling you. Absolutely.

It probably had nothing to do with the way you were weirdly infatuated by Ellie tonight, with her hair on a bun and a halfway buttoned up flannel - with nothing but a top underneath it. Or how she seemed to glow under the warm light of her room and her presence brought the biggest comfort you've ever felt in weeks. Or how her lips seemed so attractive right now, calling for your sight when she nervously bit the bottom one. Little scars were splared around her face amongst the freckles, gifts from a bunch of branches that accidentally crashed into her face once, during a patrol.

"Because… I'm your friend and I would like to know when you're interested in someone. I mean, we tell this type of stuff to each other, right?"

Not all the stuff, Ellie thought.

"Yeah, I guess. Well, you actually have never told me something like that"

"That, my beloved, is because I have nothing to tell. You know it, I'm not interested in anybody as for now"

"Or for any other time on this town"

"Ouch!" You chuckled, lightly punching her shoulder. "You're not getting away from this topic. I'll name every woman our age and you'll tell me when it's the one"

The auburn haired girl tried very hard not to express any compromising expressions, especially after the list ended and you didn't say your own name.

You couldn't think of any other person that fit into the category, and that was odd. Because if there was someone, then it should be one of those.

"Oh, you're lying!"

"I'm not!"

"You just said 'no' to every single name"

"That's the reality of the situation"

"But there is someone?!"

"You said that, not me", she shrugged.

"Alright", you seemed resigned, looking away from her green eyes. "If you don't want to tell me, that's fine"

A sting got it right into Ellie's chest. She liked you too much to let you be this way, but at the same time she didn't want to tell you. The amount of terrible things that could happen; losing you and your friendship was at the top of this list, and it was bad enough.

"It's not it, I swear", Ellie collected all the strength to softly hold your face; now she was doing it as your friend who didn't want to see you sad. She turned it so you could face her, stare at her eyes full of vivid green. "I swear, you didn't say the name"

"Okay", you sigh, trying to understand what was that feeling on your stomach that grew while her fingers still supported your chin.

"Now… Wanna watch another movie?" Her thumb caressed your face with tenderness, inside she hoped this made you less uneasy.

"Yeah", it got cold when she retracted her hands to reach for the DVD options you both picked for tonight. "You can chose it now"

[dividers by @cafekitsune]

#ellie williams x reader #ellie williams #ellie x reader #tlou ellie #ellie the last of us #ellie williams tlou2 #ellie williams tlou #ellie williams the last of us #ellie williams the last of us 2 #ellie williams oneshot #the fanfic of us #ficwriting #deblklesb

[livingemkayde]

ch vi. bruises

joel miller x f!reader x unrequited!tommy miller (no outbreak AU)

chapter six of chaser

warnings: 18+ minors please dni. ooof okay where to start, smut unprotected p in v, mentions of bruising from sex? fighting like actual real life fist fighting, rough but sweet sex, grinding, lowkey some cockwarming?? kinda unwanted kissing, tommy being annoying and somewhat overbearing, and unwanted touching, but not sexual. caroline. just, caroline. because she deserves her own warning for this one. no use of y/n.

summary: everything comes to a head at tommy's birthday party.

a/n: this is genuinely the longest part/chapter thing i've ever written so enjoy. tommy is really annoying in this one, im still deciding if he's going to have a redemption arc. sorry this took so long. as always, i love you all so much. MY TUMBLR LITERALLY SHIT ITS PANTS WHEN I TRIED TO EDIT THE TAGLIST SO IM SORRY IF YOU GUYS GOT TAGGED LIKE 400 TIMES.

if you would like to read more of mine: masterlist!

“What’s goin’ on?” Joel says, almost a whisper. You’re still not sure if he’s talking to you or Tommy. You can't take your eyes off Tommy’s gaze. From the looks of it, Joel’s question makes Tommy more angry and way more confused.  “Joel,” you say, trying to look for any indication in Tommy’s face that he’s not going to go bat shit crazy. “‘S fine. We’re okay.”  But Joel doesn’t listen. Because he’s Joel Miller and maybe you can’t see it right now, but you can hear the concern dripping off his tone—an indication that he won’t ever leave. Not now. So he stalks towards you both and you try to shake your head no, and he doesn’t listen. 

You can almost remember it like it was yesterday. 

A few weeks back, the first time you invited Tommy in for a drink after dinner. Sarah was asleep back at the house, Joel was doing — god knows what. The sun was set, the mosquitoes were probably out, and there was a quiet, even maybe too quiet silence when Tommy pulled up to your house. 

He had asked what the rest of your plans were for the night. 

You had said nothing much, not knowing it was an invitation — he stayed till 2 a.m. that night. 

But it was okay. Because he made you laugh and you enjoyed his company. He was interesting. Tommy told you about how he never wanted to go into contracting in the first place. About his broken bones, his all time biggest regrets, how he was smitten with his old high school flame turned mean cheerleader until graduation. 

It was the first time you ever realized he was — well — his own person in the sense. Not just Joel’s younger brother. But Tommy. Tommy Miller. 

Maybe in another life Tommy might’ve even been good for you. A perfect pair — a match. He wasn’t mean and brooding and he certainly didn’t have 12 years on you. 

And he made you smile. And he was genuinely—genuinely interested in your life. Your post grad prospects, college, books, and even how you played soccer just like Sarah when you were younger.

But when he leaned in that night, closer to you than ever before. You froze. Like genuinely frozen, and you couldn’t even dare to look down to his slowly approaching lips, let alone how his arms caged you in. 

“First kiss?” you remember him asking.

You had just stuttered out nonsense, not wanting to breathe too hard and run the risk of pushing your lips flush with his. 

“I — um —” you nervously laughed. You couldn’t even think—not in the way you should—not when the first person that comes to mind when Tommy says, kiss is his brother. 

He had leaned in closer then—more tentative. Like you were a scared deer in headlights or a frightened kitten and he was inching forward, wanting to move closer. 

But you didn’t really do — anything. 

And he had pulled back a bit, gave you a teasing look and a ruffle on the head and continued with the conversation.  

In all honesty you were scared that he might've been inching forward to kiss you. The small fear settling through a slightly erratic heartbeat and nervous laughs. 

You were scared then, but can’t really remember the last time you’ve felt this kind of fear. 

Hurt, discomfort, shock, maybe. 

And although it was being quickly replaced with anger, you don’t remember this feeling — this kind of fear. Not even the kind you get from watching a scary movie — where you can feel the adrenaline coursing through your veins and then dissipating when the screen goes dark, and the lights turn back on and all you have to worry about is if the scary nun from the big screen will appear in your dreams. 

You can remember all the last times you’ve gotten mad, sure. Mainly at the Miller brothers. 

But never fear — well, not until right now. 

Because whoever that Tommy was is definitely not the same guy staring back at you right now, with a bruised fist, an angry look swirled with hurt marked permanently on his face and one emotion that you can definitely place behind his eyes — jealousy. 

_

Some hours earlier. 

You spread colorful tablecloth over the mismatched tables in Joel’s backyard. The string lights are being hung up, Joel stands on a ladder towards your right, the sound of a hammer echoing through the small backyard. 

You pick your phone out of your back pocket, checking the time. You also find it in you to check Tommy’s texts again, but no other messages have been sent since last night. You look down at your phone — at the messages — and sit against one of the tables. 

Yesterday: 

You: can we talk in person?

Tommy Miller: I’ll see you tomorrow at the party?

You hadn’t seen the text until this morning, when Joel and you found it in yourselves to get out of bed, have a shower, and start setting up for the party. So when you saw it, you would be lying if you said your heart didn’t skip a beat. 

You’re a bit nervous at the prospect. You did not want to talk to him at his party—honestly just trying to text him so that the air would be cleared for the party. 

But his words echo in your mind. 

“Just think ‘bout it before you say no.” 

You let out a cursed sigh. 

Tommy had to know. Right?

If he knew the dreaded ‘no’ was already braced on your lips he had to know. That this thing between you and Tommy would never work out. That you’re way better as friends. That it would ruin everything — the dynamics of it all — that you were smitten with his brother and you guys had just slept together for the second time without Tommy’s knowledge and that—

“Alright?”

Joel stands in front of you, dipping his head to see a scowl marked on your face. You quickly — maybe even too quickly — forget about the messages, hell, forget about Tommy. 

Because Joel looks handsome. He’s always handsome, you’ve thought since the moment you met him at the bar. There’s something intoxicating about him, his arms, the curve of his neck. His brooding nature does him justice — a uniqueness about him that makes you want to uncover more, learn more, see more. 

You remember last night—very vividly through small ebbs and flows of sleep. The moonlight seeped into your skin as you both rolled around in gray sheets. 

It makes your cheeks heat a bit at the thought. 

You remember everything. Every little detail. You don’t think you’ll ever forget. 

You tuck your phone back into your pocket. 

“Yeah, sorry. ‘S just…” you trail off, he nods his head in understanding, coming closer to you. 

He braces his hands on either side of your body, caging you in. Your faces study each other’s mere inches apart. 

“Tablecloth givin’ you trouble?” Joel teases in a soft whisper, looking down at your lips, then back to your eyes. 

“Funny,” you say with a grin and run your tongue over your lips. 

“You need help, baby, all you gotta do is ask.” Joel’s small smile plays on his lips for a fleeting second. You miss it as soon as it’s gone. 

“Duly noted. But I’m not the one who’s been hanging up string lights for the past hour.”

He pats your ass a bit, teasing you and pushing out a playful sigh. 

“Perfection takes time.” 

Joel’s beginning to dip his head to kiss you, but you find it in you to bite back.

“And yet the left side’s still lower than the right,” you whisper, pulling your head back slightly. He turns quickly to look at the fence, but gives you a harder slap on your ass when he realizes the lights are, in fact, straight. 

Joel chuckles, pushing off from the table, you turn back around to continue fixing the cloths, and look back at him over your shoulder. 

He’s looking back at you too. 

“You’re killin’ me,” he says, and you smile to yourself when you turn back around. 

_

You look around the backyard and check your phone for the millionth time since the party started. You can hear Sarah running around, screaming a bit while jumping into the pool. But your brows furrow when you find that Tommy still hasn’t texted you. 

You spot a tuft of red hair swinging through your vision and spin to find Janet Baker squeezing through the crowd. 

“Janet!” you say, approaching her quickly. You’re happy to see her—Tommy didn’t invite many people you’re familiar with. 

“Hey, Doll. Thanks for the invite!” she says, pulling you into a quick hug, but when she sees the look on your face, her mouth drops into a frown. “Sweetie, you okay?” 

“Yeah, sorry. I—Tommy didn’t…I don’t really know anyone here,” you reply while sheepishly looking around the small, bustling backyard. It’s the kind of feeling you try your best to avoid. Like everyone is in on some secret joke that you have no clue about. Or everyone knows each other and you can’t even put faces to names because you don’t know any names—like right now. 

“‘S fine—I’m happy to see you made it,” you let out a defeated chuckle. 

“‘F course, baby. Charlotte really wanted to see Sarah,” she nods towards the girls in the pool, Charlotte’s red hair looking strikingly similar to the woman standing in front of you. Janet seems to be on her second drink of the afternoon, you saw her tipping back a solo cup out of the corner of your eye earlier. 

“What are you drinking?” you ask her, nodding at her cup. 

“Someone brought a fancy lookin’ wine I popped open,” she says, giving you a sly smile. “Why don’t we get you a drink? You’ll like this,” she says, you don’t have much time to react, she’s already pulling you towards the drink station. 

You both settle into a comfortable silence, looking around the backyard while Janet pours your drink. 

“So,” she says, giving you a wink. 

“So…” you echo, sending a nervous laugh her way. 

“Who’s that girl,” she nods towards Caroline while passing you a cup, you take a big sip, Janet fills it back up to the top without a second glance. 

“Caroline,” you say looking at her and Joel. They’re talking to some other people, a small group of them congregating by the barbecue. 

“Caroline…” Janet tests out on her tongue, willing you to continue. 

“Caroline—Joel’s,” you can’t help but chuckle. “date. I guess.” 

“That bother you?” she says, finishing the bottle of wine while the two of you walk back towards the edge of the pool so she can watch Charlotte and Sarah. 

“Nope,” you say, and it’s not a lie. Sure, it might be a little weird to see another woman clinging to his arm after yesterday. But you know now. And that’s all that matters. 

“Joel can—” you laugh again, “—Joel can do what he likes.” 

Janet stops walking suddenly. You tear your gaze away from Joel and look at her with a confused furrowed brow. 

“Sweetie…” she says with eyes that look way too knowing for your comfort or peace of mind. 

“Janet…?” you say, though her gaze just intensifies. 

“You mean to tell me it happened since I last saw you?”

Your eyes widen, a shocked look crosses your face and you quickly try to replace it with a bad mask of confusion. 

“W-what? I—” 

“Don’t lie to me, doll,” she warns, and she looks like she really means it. 

“Janet…” you say in a not as effective and halfhearted warning tone back. 

“Don’t you dare,” she wags her finger—a final warning. 

What has gotten into you and why can’t you find it in yourself to lie to this woman?

“Don’t te—” she gasps, “Janet, I mean it. Do not tell anyone.” 

She shuts her half open mouth and makes the my lips are sealed motion across her face. You laugh while stealing a glance at Joel. 

“I told you,” she whispers to you in a hush, joining your eyeline towards Joel.

You stay silent for a moment, just taking everything and everyone in—but at the same time just looking at Joel. when you finally break the silence you’re a bit shocked at your question. You’ve never talked about Joel like this with someone who actually knows him. Everything has always been a secret—like you were supposed to be ashamed or something. You never were.  

“How did you know?” you ask, hushed. You’re not sure she’ll even hear you. 

“Would love to say it was intuition, sweetie—but—it was him. It was written all over his face.” 

_

You stayed with Janet for the better portion of the hour, all through silent peaks at your phone to see if Tommy had texted you. When it was getting to the point where people were getting curious, you’ve just about had your limit. 

You approach Joel quickly, you don’t miss Caroline’s stunned face but you really can’t be bothered with—that—right now. 

“Joel?” you ask, pulling at his arm a bit, he excuses himself from the group and follows you towards the backyard's edge. 

“Where the hell is your brother?” you whisper.

“He’s not here?” he asks, the same hushed tone also pushing through his voice at your question. 

“No! I called him, but he’s not responding,” you pipe back while pulling out your phone. Though the lack of notifications from Tommy—just as before—tells you enough. 

You both look at each other for a fleeting second. But the same worried look is probably etched on both your faces — fuck. 

“This fuckin’ guy,” Joel mutters under his breath while pulling out his own phone and then putting it up to his ear. 

You pace around the small area you and Joel are in, observing the unfamiliar faces. 

“Nothin’,” Joel grovels, taking a peak over the fence towards the street to see if Tommy's truck has pulled up. “I’ll try ‘im again — just — you should mingle,” he says, still looking down at his phone. 

“‘S fine. I don’t really know anyone here anyways,” you say absentmindedly, looking through your phone for Tommy’s contact and putting your phone up to your ear. 

You hear yelling and shouting from the entrance to the backyard. You slowly lift your head, reluctant to tear your eyes away from frantic texts. 

You spot him, in all his glory. Tommy Miller. Two hours late to his own birthday party—though he looks like he couldn’t care less, hugging old friends and new ones. He spots your eyes in the crowd and you can’t even be bothered to smile, a frown is almost permanently placed on your face—Late to your own birthday party? 

He nods his head toward the house, a silent invitation to talk when he’s done greeting the guests. You nod back and turn to Joel, Tommy turns to everyone else. 

“He’s here,” you say, pulling Joel out of his own phone, he does a double take towards the entrance and huffs out a groan. 

“Goddamn idiot,” Joel says, running his palm over his eyebrow. 

“I’m gonna go—” you say, nodding towards the house, towards Tommy. 

“Yeah. Alright,” he replies, though he looks a bit concerned and unfocused, looking towards Tommy, then back to you, “You need me, ‘m there.”

“‘M not telling him about us on his birthday and It’s Tommy, Joel.” 

Tommy—harmless. 

Though Joel’s look sends a sweat to your palms for some reason. You don’t know why he’s worried. 

It’s Tommy. It’s fine. 

Right? 

You hope as much as you make your way through the crowd. You beeline for the house and slip past the sliding doors into the kitchen where cups and bags of chips lay open and equally sprawled. 

You can hear the door slide open and shut again behind you as you try and salvage the mess. 

“Baby,” Tommy says, rounding the corner and coming close to you, “‘M sorry. The concrete guy was supposed to drop off the shipment tomorrow but he came today and needed a signature—” 

“Tommy, it’s okay,” you almost have to will yourself to say. You also have to remember it’s his birthday. 

He looks down. 

“‘S okay. It’s your birthday. Happy birthday,” you reassure with a small smile. 

“Looks great out there,” he says, fiddling with his phone in his hand. 

“Thanks.” 

You’re suddenly a bit nervous. You hadn’t really thought about everything that had happened when Tommy being late to his own birthday party was blanketing all the drama. But he’s here now, and you have no idea what to say. Maybe it would be better to not say anything at all—not address the fact that he asked you out, or you and Joel. But that guilty gnawing feeling eats you alive the longer you stand in silence. 

“Joel helped you?” 

“Yeah. I went shopping yesterday and dropped off the stuff here then we set it up this morning,” you say, nodding towards the backyard and then your car parked out front. 

“You went shopping on your own?” he almost sounds offended. 

“I wanted to go on my own.” 

Tommy doesn't look convinced. 

“Really, T. ‘S fine,” you brush off, leaning back against the kitchen counter and crossing your arms. He stares at you from the other side of the kitchen. 

“Caroline here?” he asks, a hesitant look on his face as he switches from looking at the ground to your face—almost like he’s looking for a reaction. 

“She’s out there somewhere,” you nod, keeping a neutral face masked with a small smile. “You should mingle. Just wanted to make sure everything was alright.” 

But he doesn’t move, he just keeps fiddling with the case on his phone again, looking down to the floor—his feet. 

“I— you said you wanted to talk in person.” 

Shit. 

You both look at each other, waiting. A game of cat and mouse. 

“It can wait, T. Enjoy your party,” you say, gesturing to the crowd outside. 

“Is it about—is it about what happened Friday?” 

“Tommy,” you say, almost warningly. This situation is shitty enough as is. You really don’t want to spoil everything—even if there’s nothing left to spoil. 

He doesn’t say anything. His thumb fiddling with his phone is the only sound coming from inside the kitchen. He looks at you, waiting for you to continue. Almost unbearable. You crack way quicker than you’d hope to last. 

If he wants it like this, at his own birthday party, then so be it. 

“Fine. I just—I wanted to…” you scramble for words but they jumble in your mind. 

“I’m—” you fall short again. “About what you said. What you asked me. I don’t think that it’s…something I want. I’m—sorry.” 

“You don’t think it’s something you want? Or you know that—” 

“Tommy,” you say, giving him an awkward stifled laugh. Like he’s being childish with his response. Because he is. “I don’t—I’m sorry.”

He turns away from you suddenly, towards the window above the sink and just stares at it for a long time. You can see his chest puffing. When he finally turns back around, it’s different. It’s the Tommy you know. 

“‘S okay,” He says. 

Maybe he’ll get over it quickly—you hope. 

“Are you okay? I’m—I mean I hope that this doesn’t change anything since I’m still gonna be around—” you lift your arm up to run a ragged hand across your forehead and through your hair, you don’t even notice that your shirt riding up, “— I just don’t want it to like—” 

“What is that?” 

Your eyes snap to Tommy’s, confused. You think he might be looking out the window again but his eyes trail to you, but lower. Like he’s looking at your hips—because he is. You’re still confused for a second, before examining your shirt, looking for stains or anything out of the ordinary. But you don’t find anything, your top spotless. 

“What? I don’t—” 

“No—” he takes a couple quick steps forward, into your space, you try to find his eyes—yours blown out with confusion and shock but his are trained and laser focused to your waistline. 

“What’s—” he tries to pull up your shirt, you shove him back out of reflex. “You’re hurt, what happened t’you?” 

He almost pins down your hands to see your skin under your shirt, dipping his head to look at your waist and hips and you suddenly know. You know there are hand shaped bruises littered across the skin of your waist, turning it deep purple. Handprints that match Joel’s exactly—almost like they’re burned into you. You saw it this morning. It’s why you didn’t bother to put on a swimsuit and decided to keep a top on instead. 

What’s even worse is you know Tommy saw it too. 

“Tommy!” you’re yelling now, fighting his grip. 

You slip up, unable to get a good hold on his wrist like he now has on yours and he pushes the shirt up to reveal the bruises. 

“What the hell is that?” 

“Fucking—get off!” he backs away with your second shove, a different kind of look on his face. “Jesus,” you huff out, yanking your shirt back down. 

You both stand there. A pregnant silence between you. You can almost hear the gears turning, he stares blankly. Putting it all together. Like maybe you’re not hurt, but you wanted it—wanted it from another man. Somewhere in the back of his mind he might keep wishing someone hurt you so he didn’t have to feel so betrayed. So when he asks, it’s like he doesn’t want to admit that it’s true—the quiet possibility of someone else in the picture. 

“Who,” he says slowly, pointing down to your waist, “did that?”

“Tommy—” you say, but footsteps cut you off, you both turn your head to the entrance of the kitchen as Joel rounds the corner. He looks out of breath and his eyes flicker from Tommy and his finger pointing down at your waist then back to you. 

“We alright in here?” Joel stands, hesitant, his fingers play with the bottom hem of his shirt in an anxious way. Like he doesn't know what he’s just walked in on—you’re not entirely sure you know the answer to that either. You aren’t sure if he’s talking to you or Tommy so you stay silent, waiting for the man in front of you to respond. 

“Yup,” Tommy replies, too angry to be believable. 

Joel looks at you but he doesn’t say anything. Not out loud. 

No. You try to say with your eyes. We are definitely not alright in here. 

“What’s goin’ on?” Joel says, almost a whisper. You’re still not sure if he’s talking to you or Tommy. You can't take your eyes off Tommy’s gaze. From the looks of it, Joel’s question makes Tommy more angry and way more confused. 

“Joel,” you say, trying to look for any indication in Tommy’s face that he’s not going to go bat shit crazy. “‘S fine. We’re okay.” 

But Joel doesn’t listen. Because he’s Joel Miller and maybe you can’t see it right now, but you can hear the concern dripping off his tone—an indication that he won’t ever leave. Not now. So he stalks towards you both and you try to shake your head no, and he doesn’t listen. 

He stands beside you, putting a flat sprawled palm on Tommy’s chest and silently tries to push him backward. But Tommy breaks first, pushing Joel’s hand off him, staggering back while looking at you and Joel.

And maybe he gets it then, you think. Because Tommy lets out a deep chuckle—like you’ve got clown makeup on. Like he’s never seen anything more funny. He’s a lot of things but he is not fucking stupid. So he looks past Joel to your eyes. To your face, almost covered—ridden—in guilt and he can see everything. 

“Really?” Tommy says, not sparing Joel a glance. 

“You put your fuckin’ hands on her?” Tommy says, almost at a whisper which makes it all the more intimidating. You can see Joel’s back puff, his anger rising. But you also know Joel would never hurt his brother. Not on purpose.

But you’re scared. You’re really fucking scared in this moment because Tommy is entirely too worked up and you know whatever excuse Joel is going to say won’t help. 

“Easy,” Joel says, his voice cutting through the tense silence. 

You’re sweating. The hot summer of July in Austin getting to you. They stare at each other for a long time. Like at the kitchen table, like when you all first met. But this time, Tommy breaks, and his eyes flicker to yours, he takes a tiny step to the side so he can see you better. 

“Is this why? Is this why you’re fuckin’—jesus, fuck. ‘S this why he went to get you a tire?” you stand, you can’t really say anything, your stunned figure doesn’t move.  

“He hurt you,” Tommy breathes out, his voice almost breaking if he wasn’t so angry. You shake your head. 

You both know that the bruises aren’t from hurt. That they’re far from it. 

“He didn’t,” you reply. 

“No, no, baby. He’s—you’re—” Tommy almost looks like he can’t believe it, shaking his head, switching between you and Joel. The look you give him shuts him up, and makes him back away, until Joel unclenches his fists and relaxes his shoulder a fraction. 

“I didn’t really want to tell you like this, I was—” 

“Fucking my brother?” he bites back, interrupting you. 

That makes you a bit mad. You’re not in love with his attitude, nor his tone. It’s not like he has any right. It’s not like either of them do. 

Joel moves to speak but you do it first. 

“Don’t give me that,” you say, almost laughing, though the situation is not funny, not in the slightest. “We’re not dating, Tommy. We never were.” 

Caroline strides in at that, looking at the scene unfolding in the kitchen. She stops short of the three of you, her mouth slightly agape. You roll your eyes, fucking perfect. Let’s just bring the party in here instead. You’ll give it to the woman. She has impeccable timing.

“Needed some napkins…” she trails off, holding the empty napkin stand in her right hand up so everyone can see. “I—I can come back.”

“Did you know?” Tommy turns to her, gesturing to you and Joel. 

“Tommy,” Joel says from in front of you, a warning. Tommy ignores him. 

“Did you know?” he asks again, Caroline stares back shocked. But she does consider it, rolls the idea around in her head before speaking. 

“Them two?” Tommy nods. “Her?” 

Okay. You really don’t love that tone. You silently chastise yourself for thinking she was nice at the bar when your first instinct was that she was a bitch—because she is. You were waiting for her snarky undertones or spoiled takes to show. You knew it was coming, you just didn’t know when. 

“No, ‘f couse not.” She’s almost laughing, like it could never be possible. It hits you harder than you’ll ever admit. “She’s — you’re…young,” she says, looking at you. 

Tommy gestures to you and Joel like he’s saying, well believe it, because it’s true.

Joel moves faster than you can comprehend. He’s got a tight grip on Tommy’s arm. He probably doesn’t even have to say anything, Tommy knows what’s happening. But Joel warns him anyway—again. 

“Quit,” he growls. You’d guess this might be the point where Tommy usually backs down. But this situation is far from usual. 

“Or what?” Tommy bites back. When Joel doesn’t respond he continues. “You gonna mark me up? Leave me all black and blue?” 

Tommy doesn’t stop there, you try to move past Joel but he stops you, turns his head to you slightly, a hardened look in his eye.

“Oh, I forgot you’d probably like that, huh?” 

Joel remains frozen for a couple fleeting seconds before whipping around and pushing Tommy into the back counter. You’re rooted to your place, you don’t even care that Caroline is still in the corner, holding the fucking napkin holder in the air. 

“What’d you say?” Joel barks in Tommy’s face. 

“Look at her fuckin’ stomach, dude!” Tommy throws the words in his face, pushing him back slightly and making a vague gesture in your direction, it causes your feet to move towards the brothers before you can think. 

Joel backs off then, sneaking a tiny glance at you out of the corner of his eye, like he really is thinking about the marks he left on your waist. He had seen them this morning, ran his fingers over them too, and saw how the notches matched the curves of his fingers perfectly. But you kissed him, and told him it was okay. That it was more than okay. Maybe even whispered that you liked it between muffled groans. So when a glint of guilt flashes in his eyes it makes your heart break more than it already has. 

“She said no,” Joel says, looking back at Tommy. A tense silence follows—like you’re not sure if Joel is going to continue or Tommy is going to bite back.

“Get back to your party,” Joel growls after a while. You bite your lip.

Tommy looks at Joel with unwavering eyes. His glance turns towards the window where he can see the bustling crowd—can almost hear the laughter. Then he looks down to his hand, outstretches it, undoes his gnarly fist, and when it curls back up again, you finally bite. 

“Tommy!” you say, moving closer. But it’s too late. Joel’s figure knocks to the side and his hand instinctively grabs his face, his nose, his eye. Maybe the worst part about it all is that Joel doesn’t even look remotely surprised, or that he wants to fight back—he just stays there, a little hunched over when you yelp in shock and Tommy groans, shaking out a now bruised fist. 

“Fuck,” you almost yell, your body doesn’t know what to do between bending down to see Joel’s face and looking at Tommy—at his face—because you don’t recognize him. 

Joel almost huffs out a laugh, and to shut him up, to get him to bite his tongue, you speak again. 

“Okay. We’re done here,” you say, pushing Joel towards the entrance of the house, towards your car. 

And Caroline is there, pushing Tommy towards the couches and for the first time, you’re grateful for her. 

_

The ride back to your house is silent after a short and quick bicker about who can drive. You think Joel might want to sit in the driver's seat so you can’t see the quickly forming bruises on the left side of his face but you make a decent argument, enough to settle him in the passengers—looking out the window. 

You send Janet a quick text, asking if she can watch Sarah for a few hours. Brother emergency. Janet replies back and says the girls haven’t gotten out of the pool since you left. It makes you smile a bit, despite it all. 

When you park in your driveway, you hop out quickly, Joel following closely behind. He waits there, right behind you, when you pull out your house keys, and waits when you unlock the deadbolt and waits when you push through the door. 

“Make yourself at home,” you say, nodding towards the couches and dropping your keys in the bowl. 

You disappear into the kitchen and brace your arms on the counter, your head hanging between your shoulders. You let out a deep, ragged breath and try to control your heartbeat. 

“Fuck,” you mumble, shaking out your wrists, grabbing two advil from the bottle on your counter, a glass of water, and peas from freezer.  

Joel’s sitting on the loveseat, looking down at his hands. You don’t say anything. He doesn’t either. He just takes the water and pills from your hands and swallows it silently. You extend the peas to him, he thinks about it for a while and when you shake them again, huffing, saying—just fucking take them. He finally obliges. 

You get a good look at his cheek when he turns to set the water down on the table and you have to stop yourself from gasping. 

“Joel,” you murmur, reaching for him, bending down, he stops you, grabs your wrist, then grabs your hand. But he’s gentle. Not like Tommy. Joel’s gentle. 

“‘S fine,” he says, and winces when the peas touch his face. “‘M fine.”

You settle in between his legs, looking down at him. He’s got one hand on his face, holding the peas, and the other, wrapped around the back of your thigh. He doesn’t even want to look up at you. It breaks your heart. 

“‘M sorry,” you say quietly, his hand on your thigh trails upward. He plays with the hem of your shirt and lifts it enough to take a peek at the purple that lies there. 

He doesn’t say anything, just sits there, running a gentle, ghost-like touch across the bruises. 

“He — saw it. I don’t…” you look down to your stomach. You can see the shape of his fingertips so clearly. It’s no wonder Tommy reacted how he did. “It was an accident.”

He doesn’t nod. Doesn’t shake his head. He tosses the peas onto the table and pushes the cotton of your shirt up further, to where he can see all of it—all the black and blue there. 

“Are you mad?” you whisper, hesitantly, as he stares at his own hands, his own branding. 

“‘M sorry,” he mumbles. 

“Don’t be,” you say, begging, “Please.”

“He did that cause—,” you breathe out, taking his chin in your pointer finger and thumb and getting your first good look at his cheek, “—it’s-’s my fault, I should’ve—”

“C’mon. Don’t do that,” he says, cutting you off, nipping your apology in the bud, “I should be the one who’s sorry, this is — I hurt you.” 

You shake your head. 

“You know that’s not—you know that I—” you stifle a short chuckle. 

“That you what?”

You let out a couple hot breaths, looking down at him, the purple around his eye slowly taking shape. 

“That I liked it.” 

Joel bends forward then, and you gasp. The dull scratch of his beard is the only thing keeping your eyes open. He trails his hot breath across your stomach, and leaves gentle kisses on your sides, on your bruises.

“Joel,” you mumble, and you hate how your voice sounds so breathy, maybe even desperate. You tangle your hands in his hair, grasping at the nape of his neck he pulls you down, closer, so you’re slotted in his lap, straddling him. Joel pulls back and looks at your face, brushes the fallen hair from your eyes. 

“I meant what I said,” you start, he furrows his brow, “Still—mean it.”

From the look in his eyes he knows what you’re talking about. The words you slipped into his ear last night.

‘S you, Joel — it’s-’s always been you.

“But if this is—if Tommy—” you cut yourself off, correcting your words, “If I messed it up—” 

“Sweetheart,” he says. Your heart pulls, you almost put your hand on his cheek, but you see the rising skin and settle for his shoulder. “‘M not goin’ anywhere.” 

“Are you sure?” 

He pulls you down further, so you’re flush against him. He studies your eyes and rubs at your waist, your hips. It sends a little fire down between your thighs. 

“‘M here—‘M…I’m right here,” he mumbles, and shakes his head. Like he’s telling you no to any silent thoughts of doubt that might be floating around your head. 

And then he pulls your head down to kiss you. 

It’s needy, and hot and everything you want at this moment. He’s everywhere and you can feel his growing arousal between your legs. You both needed this—you think. After everything, after—fucking—Caroline and Janet Baker and Tommy Miller. You both needed each other so bad that when you grind down onto him he lets out a little desperate groan into your mouth that spurs you on. 

Joel slips his hand under your shirt and finds the hardened peak there. He pinches it and rolls it between his fingers, it sends your hips forward and suddenly he’s sitting up, and shucking your shirt off. 

He grabs your hips and moves you against him, your most vulnerable spots grinding against each other. Giving you both blown out eyes and puffy lips and panting breath. 

“Sh–it,” you gasp when your shorts catch on your clit perfectly. 

“Pretty,” he says, grasping at your tits, at anything he can find while you grind against his length. “fuckin’—pretty like this.”

You claw at his belt and before you know it, he’s lifting you up so you’re on your knees and he’s pulling his pants past his hips. You get the memo and take your shorts off, tossing them behind you. When you sink back down onto his lap, you can feel his cock slip between your wet lips down there. 

“Fuck, Joel,” you say, gliding along his cock, soaking it. You can feel all of him now—grinding along his hardness—the girth of him fitting perfectly between your swollen lips. 

“Angel,” Joel pants out, through sloppy kisses. You look at him. He’s got a desperate look on his face. Like he couldn’t wait just like you. Not even to get upstairs to your bedroom or to get all his clothes off. Like he’s been wanting this all day. Just like you. 

You move up and reach down, feeling the wet mess you’ve both made down between your legs. You find his cock, hard and wanting, and position it at your entrance. The head sinks past your walls, enveloping it somewhere deeper and you both groan at the feeling. 

You sink down on him slowly, you’re by no means physically ready to take him. But you can’t wait any longer. He kisses you, and down to your neck, making it easier to ease yourself down onto him, and when you finally reach the end, and you’re seated fully in his lap, you both gasp. 

Your walls clench around him, eliciting a quiet groan from Joel somewhere near your neck. Your eyes roll back in your head, your forehead drops onto his shoulder. You both just sit there, waiting for the other to make a move. 

It’s kind of like a game. 

See how long you can both relish in each other’s warmth — the first person who moves loses. 

Your walls tighten again and he lets out another groan, “Jesus,” he mumbles, nipping at your neck. You’re slowly adjusting to him, relaxing around him. It makes you shudder. 

You realize he’s not really touching you. He’s got his hands on your thighs, but they’re just resting there. Not squeezing or gripping your hips like you know he so desperately wants. Maybe he’s scared, you think. From everything that’s happened today. From the consequences his touch barred. 

But you didn’t care about the consequences. You liked his touch, needed his touch, just as much as he needed something to hold him back down to earth, anchor him to you—in you. And afterall, you just want him to feel good. Feel better. 

“Touch me,” you gasp out, reaching down to his hands. 

“Am touchin’ you,” he forces out, panting near your ear. His thumb absentmindedly pushes down on the skin of your thigh a fraction harder and then eases up, like he’s saying this is the best I can do. 

“No, Joel,” you moan, rock your hips a little, moving first, moving frantically and suddenly, “touch me,” you say into his neck, reaching down to usher his hands to your hips, your waist, you. 

Joel gets it then, the silent permission. The it’s okay, and grips you harder, but not as hard as you know he would like. It’s good enough for you because he moves your hips, rocking you up and down onto his length—having enough of the senseless grinding. 

“Fuckin’ good—” Joel groans, your hands fly to his shoulders, his hair. “You feel good.” 

Your legs grow tired, he can tell. You try your best, but you’re sweaty and tired and fucked out, and when he hits a spot deeper inside you that makes you moan out, louder than before, and you almost collapse onto him. He ruts into you a little. Meeting you halfway. Fucking you deeper—maybe even a bit faster. 

Your legs ache and you feel a sheen of sweat wash over both of you. And Joel’s eye is fucked up, his cheek too. Tommy is sitting back at the house—or god knows where—with a possible broken hand, Janet baker is watching Sarah instead of you or Joel, Caroline is still back at the house, and everything is a fucking mess, but it’s so right. He feels so right. He’s — he’s right. 

You’re close then, the coarse hair on him inching you toward your climax. He knows, he can feel it from the inside. You don’t even have to say it this time, your question for his permission. He can see it already braced on your lips but he shuts you up with a kiss, a sloppy one, where he sticks his tongue into your mouth and your walls tighten around him again. 

“Yes,” he says with a moan into your mouth, “yes, yes—ah.”

“Fuck,” you say tightening around him, becoming breathless and boneless, but Joel holds you up. He always does. 

He grips you tighter, like how you know he wanted to, and you relish in the feeling. His thrusts become desperate and you brace yourself on the back of the couch so he can rut up deeper, chasing after his own orgasm. You can’t really breathe. Not when he’s everywhere. 

“Shit,” he says, rocking into you. 

Joel cums hard, holding onto you, wrapping you up in his arms as he groans somewhere near your temple. You let it spread through you, the mess of it all. He keeps you locked in his arms, even when you think he might pull away. 

He finally pulls you off him, when he says it becomes too much and you sit on his lap, playing with his curls. When you both settle from your panting you can’t help but ask.

“What are we gonna do?” you say quietly to him. 

“I dunno,” he grabs your hand and gives it a quick kiss. The bruise on his face is turning an ugly shade of purple. And the peas have gone warm, creating a small puddle on the coffee table. And your phone keeps buzzing from the entryway. 

“We’ll figure it out,” he says, running a hand on your thigh. 

_

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#joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x reader #joel x reader #the last of us hbo #joel miller #joel miller self insert #the last of us #joel fic #the last of us fanfiction #tlou fic #joel the last of us #pedro pascal #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal as joel miller #joel miller smut #smut #joel x f!reader #joel x female reader #joel x you #tlou fanfiction #dbf!joel miller #dbf!joel #dom!joel #dom!joel miller #tommy miller #chaser

[not-goldy]

Not your followers thinking Jimin doesn't need to be big star also. Are they even sane ??? EACH AND EVERY MEMBER IN BTS IS AMBITIOUS AF, ESPECIALLY JM. But unlike JK, JM is not airhead to keep on saying he want to be next big thing, want to be seen as this het fuckboy who only sings about sex to be seen as mature, want to be one and only kpop star to do so bla bla bla all while not lifting a pen to write songs, won't have streams and sales without a 938397328 versions and all that mediaplay from company. Or atleast the bare minimum hold a mic properly and talk/sing without fidgeting and embarrassing yourself. How you gonna dominate western market without even communication skills lmao.. those times when he used to stand in shade of RM is gone lol. Jk's big project DREAMERS debuted under bubbling 100 while JM gave that YG company their 1st hot 100 entry by a collab. So saying JK is this and that while we are not seeing results organically is dumb af. Golden maknae because he sing and dance some white man's songs which company already bought success for ? Oh there's 100 other artists who sings and dance way better than him. He can't hold 5 mins on stage if he's doing a dance battle with Jimin lol.

What company doing to members IS INJUSTICE AF.. especially Jimin who fucking proved he can also be the 'next big thing'. But they conveniently sweep him under rug so his shine won't affect their industry plant launch. Or why can't they support him too ???? Is it that difficult ? JK didn't do a shit and got everything. I BET HE WONT DEBUT NO.1 FOR SEVEN NOR GET ALL THOSE RECORDS IF IT WAS NOT THE PUSH FROM SCOOTS. BE FR. Go and check his BB points to see how payola impacted his chart. It would've been a -48 like 3D on second week too. While what we asked for Jimin was the deserved support in 2nd week for a song which fucking went no.1 with fans support and artist impact alone. It's NOT secretly wishing JK's treatment for JM, but asking what he fucking deserves. Literally any company will give the extra promos for his in 2nd week but not hybe who's on a mission to sell themselves to somehow establish JK in west 😬

And don't say JM will chose me over JK. Did I said I want JM to chose me ????? THIS IS HIS CAREER HE WORKED HARD FOR NOT A FUCKASS RELATIONSHIP. Even if you look at their relationship also, it's the same lol. JM keep on giving and giving him his everything while JK sit back and enjoy Jimin while not even bothering to post a simple bday wish or go and meet him even after him begging a 100 times.

YOU CANT CALL OTHERS JK ANTIS BECAUSE THEY SEE TRUTH AND SAY IT OUT LOUD. Ask him to play fairly like a man 1st, then we will see who's the real winner here ?

DAMN IF PSYCHO WAS A PERSON

IF HE'S WINNING DOES IT MATTER HOW HE'S WINNING???? DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW THINGS WORK IN THIS WORLD OR ARE YOU ONE OF THE DELULUS WHO THINK HARD WORK IS EVERYTHING?

You are crazy if you think money, connections, power, politics, privilege and luck play zero role in making a star. Please find other 2 yr olds and hug them, don't bring this shit to the adult table its embarrassing.

I'm embarrassed for you.

Scoot---- okay, MA'AM A PUSH IS A PUSH WHETHER IT'S FROM SCOOBY-DOO OR THE DEVIL

TAKE YOUR WEIRD MORAL COMPASS AND CHICKEN CHANGE ETHICS TO SOMEONE WHO ACTUALLY GIVES A FUCK

READ MY LIPS

Go weep somewhere else.

You gonna come on the internet and bitch complain bout how the entertainment industry is not fair WELL BOO HOO CRY ME A RIVER YOU LOSER.

And make sure you come with a costume next time so we know the circus from whence you came Missy Clowniot.

You give PJMs a bad name you ASS HAT

You sound like those whiny kpop losers who complain BTS has privilege and connections and power and their lame loser favs don't- as if power and connections are things you throw on people's laps.

If Hard work is all it takes BTS WOULD HAVE SEVERAL GRAMMYS YOU DUMBASS.

And the fact you out here farting yourself in the name of Park Jimin irks me so much. Here's the truth you want so bad, YOU SUCK. And you making Jimin out to be pathetic too damn.

Now I know it's not Park Jimin you out here acting like he's inferior and a victim and a loser who needs the bar to be lowered and for people to choose him love him play fair and nice before he can win. Child THE AUDACITY.

YOU DON'T THINK DO YOU??

I know he's not the one you fucking dragging through the mud indirectly with these brain dead waste of breathe rants.

PLEASE STOP JIMIN DON'T NEED A FAN LIKE YOU.

YOU ARE EMBARRASSING HIM.

The nerve and audacity for you to even compare him to- WELL ANY ONE I'M ABOUT TO PUT HANDS ON YOU FOR THAT.

I WILL SMACK THE SHIT OUT OF YOU FOR THIS FOR REAL.

It's the lack of intelligence and you not taking a hint and you not knowing when to stop- FUCK IT LET'S GET NASTY THEN.

THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOU AND I IS I CAN'T PUT ANY ONE ON A PEDESTAL ABOVE PARK JIMIN ENOUGH TO VICTIMIZE HIM THE WAY YOU DO.

HE'S IN A LEAGUE OF HIS OWN PLEASE LEAVE HIM ALONE HE IS NOT COMPETING WITH NO FUCKING ONE

HAVE SOME FUCKING CLASS AND TACT

OR GO OVER THERE WHERE THE OTHER PJMs OF YOUR CALIBRE ARE

IF JIMIN SEES THIS HE WILL THROW UP AND I'M GONNA WIPE HIS VOMIT WITH YOUR FACE YOU RAGGEDY ASS

NEVER EVER EVOOOOORRR COMPARE PARK BIG DADDY JIMIN TO ANY ONE LET ALONE HIS SWEET HEART

NO ONE IS ON HIS LEVEL AND NO ONE WILL EVER BE.

ALSO JIKOOK ARE A FUCKING POWER COUPLE THE FUCK!

IF JUNGKOOK'S POWER MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE

GO SIT OVER THERE

[legacyshenanigans]

Could we maybe possibly get a lil Drabble/HC type post of Volo’s death magic in action 👀

YESSSSS! I was thinking about doing one anyway girl! I adore that you always slide into the DMs asking for it though 😩💚

Marvolo using Necromancy magic🐍

Rowan: I erm..Found the guy you wanted me to track down..

Marvolo: Excellent..Where is he?

Rowan: In the basement...

Marvolo makes his way down there, with Rowan following closely. He walks in, seeing a decomposing corpse on the table..

Marvolo: *sigh* Oh for goodness sake...

Rowan: ...Yeah.

Marvolo: *inspecting the body* Urgh...Rotten..

Rowan: I mean, I didn't know if ya woulda wanted me to bring it here or not, but I did anyway.

Marvolo: I'm glad you did. Vile as it is. It's at least a week, maybe 2 weeks dead.. Worry not *rubs his hands together* Anything can be made to talk.

Rowan: (??)

Marvolo reaches his hand out, hovering it over the putrid corpse. He takes in a large inhale through his nose and closes his eyes. He mutters to himself, and the room suddenly feels cold and falls silent. Rowan looks around, feeling the dark effect taking over the room. Marvolos eyes snap open, glowing green, the corpse sits bolt right up on the table, taking in a harsh pained breath. Marvolo smirks to himself, his hand still aimed in concentration towards the body. The corpses' voice is the thing of nightmares, the agony in its words, you can almost hear the gargle of the congealed blood in its throat.

Corpse: P-Pleeeease. HUu-urts-

Marvolo: Shhhh, answer my questions, and you shall rest..

The Corpse tries to nod, thick slime dribbling from its mouth as its head falls forward then back up once more.

Marvolo: How did you die?

Corpse: Old gang. K-Killed meeee.

Marvolo: Why?

Corpse: Left. G-Gang. Boss couldn't. Aaargh- C-Couldn't risk me talkin' Nnngh! S-Sent g-goons..After meeeee-

Rowan: Heh..Clearly didn't expect THIS, did he?

Marvolo: I know of your boss *frowns* I've been struggling to find his fucking hideout..Tell me! Where is it!?

Corpse: N-Nooo P-Pleeeease..STooop this..Pain!

Marvolo: SPEAK.

Corpse: F-Forbidden Forest... Underground...Passage..Near..O-Old willow tree...Other side of...ARRRHH...Lake!...*coughs up dark blood* Hidden...With magic...

Marvolo: *narrows his eyes* illusion magic?

Corpse: YES!...P-Pleeeeease!!!!

Marvolo: ....Rest.

Marvolo closes his eyes once more, dropping his hand away from the corpse. The body falls flat back on the table, lifeless once more. Marvolo stumbles over to a chair in the room, slumping down onto it. He shivers slightly, letting out an exasperated breath.

Rowan: (?!) *rushes over to him* Are you ok? *goes to touch his arm*

Marvolo: DONT TOUCH ME!

Rowan: (?!?!?)

Marvolo: *sighs* I'm sorry.. That takes a lot of energy out of me..Sends my head a little messy *heavy breath as he composes himself* Especially when they fucking fight it.

Rowan: That was crazy..I've never seen ya do that..

Marvolo: Its not something I use often..Anyway..The hideout, hidden by illusion magic. That's no bother..An easy thing to seek out and remove once you know its there. We'll go later..

Rowan: *nods* Yeah.. 'Course.. I'm with ya..

~

#marvolo gaunt headcanons #marvolo gaunt hc #marvolo gaunt #rowan the wolf

[insertpoetryhere]

My autistic historical Sebastian Michaelis "Where's Waldo?" Post.

If you do not already know that I make content for me and me alone, then IDK what to tell you.

Anyways, this post comes to you all in the aftermath of me finding out that in 2010, Yana said that she was probably never going to reveal Sebastian's age or his true nature. Which I am taking as written permission for me to take whatever crazy idea I have and run with it until my legs give out.

Now, we're all familiar with the theory that Sebastian himself used to be human. And going into the evidence for that and how i have deluded myself into thinking its true by tearing apart every word that comes out of Mr. Michaels' mouth is a different post entirely. And while the theory is cool as all hell, it does create a question. When and where is Sebastian originally from?

Lucky for no one, I am a history student with a love for answering questions nobody asked me. And my answer is... definitely younger than you think. But also still old as shit.

So with me, Mr. Michaelis, and the entirety of human history plus nearly an entire globe of habitable land, let's narrow it down.

(Note: since I am going off of the canon of the manga, I will not be including evidence from most of season 1 and 2 of the anime since those two sources are not canon. Which sadly makes this task harder bc I can't use the mummy quote he made in season 2.)

Section 1: Location.

We will start here, since it's the less daunting of the two tasks and Sebastian actually makes this part super easy. All of Sebastian's historical references (which are few, but still very suspicious and said in front of humans) reference history taking place in Europe. He shares his name with a French inquisitor from the 17th century. Obviously, as implied by the last point, his chosen surname is French. He speaks fluent French and East Franconian German.

That last point is going to be the most helpful in narrowing this down, but as I'm sure you've already picked up what I'm putting down; I'm diagnosing him with French.

Let's go back to the East Franconian Dialect. Here, we have a map showing the places where this specific dialect is spoken.

(Please pardon that it is in German, it was just the best map that showed everything up close.)

Now, here is an image showing the location of the French-German border,

I'm sure you see where I am going with this.

Now, since we are dealing with history, there does need to be wiggle room for the migration of languages as time has gone and the way borders move around due to history generally happening. So to illustrate this , I have made my own crude map of two possible regions that Sebastian could be from and overlayed them to find the one most likely to have birthed him or whatever.

So yeah. We are looking at the French-German border, with France being the most likely culprit since he has a pretty heavy bias towards it.

Section 2: Time

Alright, now its just the matter of narrowing down when in the 300,000 years that humans have been a thing.

Easy stuff.

Luckily for us, Sebastian is a talker and thanks to getting punked by a 10 year old, he can't lie. Unlucky for us is that he's not very specific.

He makes several references to the 15th century and beyond, which most would consider to be modern history. But his comment about a human lifetime (which I would assign to roughly 75 years as that has been a pretty consistently attainable old age for at least the last few centuries) implies that he has to be more than just 400 years old, seeing as that would make a human lifetime a solid 19% of his current age if he really was that young.

So I went through all of the historical reference points I could find in the manga that came out of Sebastian's mouth and tracked down the earliest. Which got me... nowhere.

The earliest traceable historical reference that I could find was when Sebastian was loudly discussing his experiences with religious wars (in front of humans). And while I was originally pumping my fist in the air, I immediately started going through the stages of grief plus a secret sixth stage just for fun when I realized that bitch didn't specify which religious wars he had seen.

"Poetry, how many could there be?" A lot. Spanning from 312 CE to the modern day. And all he said was that he has "[...] witnessed this, first hand, on countless occasions" in reference to all the religious wars he has apparently seen but won't specify which one (I'm going to put his head on a stick).

Since Sebastian's vague accounts of all the religious wars did not give me the definitive lower limit I was hoping for, I had to put a pin in that and look elsewhere for evidence.

Weirdly enough, that line of thought took me right back to languages. On top of the two listed languages from the previous section, Sebastian also speaks fluent Latin. I originally wrote this off as him just being a demon who does demon things until I remembered that both Germany and France (specifically all of France and a chunk of eastern Germany, as highlighted above in section 1) were at one point part of the Roman Empire under the unified name of Gaul.

Map for proof.

Gaul was fully conquered by Rome in 181 CE, who did not lose control of the area until the 6th century CE. Meaning we have narrowed this down from 300,00 years to just a little over 4 centuries.

While Sebastian does speak the modern version of both French and German, this could probably just be because he's lived for so long and saw the area transition from the Gaulish language to the modern dialects he speaks now. And with the Roman Empire universally speaking Latin, he would obviously be familiar with that as well.

To go back to Sebastian's infuriating comment about the religious wars he has witnessed, I mentioned that the oldest official religious war took place in the year 312 CE. This lands it directly in the middle of Rome's control over Gaul. Funnily enough, this "first holy war" is the Battle of Milvian Bridge, which took place October 28th, 312 and was a Roman civil war which (through a collection of events that I refuse to get into) established Rome as a Christian empire via Constantine.

Because all of this is lining up way too perfectly, I'm going to assume that when Sebastian says "countless" religious wars, he's starting with the first one. Plus I'm mad at him so if I tack on an extra century or so to his age then so be it.

Seeing as Sebastian can speak Latin fluently and doesn't seem to have any strong anti-Roman sentiments, we can assume that he's not from the early days of Roman-controlled Gaul. We will put a general pin in that as about half way through the third century, around 250 CE.

Now, we are trying to to narrow down Sebastian's birth year. So clearly 312 CE won't do if we are operating under the assumptions that Sebastian A.) was a human person who followed general human development and B.) actually remembers this civil war with any clarity. He can't remember the war at all if he was any younger than about 4, and he wouldn't understand the permanence of death if he was any younger than about 8. This means that at his very youngest, Sebastian would have had to be born in 304 CE.

Our range is now from ~250 CE- 304 CE, which is about as low of a range as I think we will be willing to get. So where does this put Sebastian's age in Black butler.

When he meets Ciel in the year 1896, he would have been 1,646 at the oldest and 1,592 at the youngest. And as of the current arc, He is in the age range of 1,595-1,649.

Conclusion

Based on the evidence gathered and going off of the popular fan theory that Sebastian was in fact at one point a human person, he was most likely born in Roman-controlled Gaul from 250-304 CE, making him either midway through or swiftly approaching his sweet 16th-century of life.

Now it goes without saying that I am by no means trying to say that this is canon. I can't even claim with 100% certainty that every word of this is perfectly sound since my sources are mostly just the class I'm currently taking on European history pre-1500 and the Britannica website. It's all in good fun and if I fucked up, I beg of you to tell me so that I may throw myself down this rabbit hole again.

#sebastian michaelis #black butler #kuroshitsuji

[footygirl114]

Fiebre del bebe (Alexia Putellas x Reader)

So as promised, my surprise with @onlyhereforthestories We both wanted to post something today for both of us hitting a follower milestone. We have not read each others stories, but we both got the same prompt; R or Alexia wants a kid, but the other does not because it’s scary. I hope mine lives up the amazing writing of @onlyhereforthestories

Watching your favourite person in the world post game holding a baby is the best sight in the world. You had just watched her team cruise to the league title win, and during the post game celebration she has Irene’s baby in her arms and it makes your heart swell with love for her. 

You and Alexia had been together for years, you had just bought and settled into your forever home, you had Nala together, and had gone to the courthouse together with her sister, mother and your brother during lockdown to make your lives official. You were ready for the next step and you knew it was time to bring it up to her. 

Watching her interact with kids always did you in, when she wondered over to you in the stands after the celebrations, you made sure to tell her that. 

“Hola Ale, good game love” you tell her as soon as she’s in ear shot. 

She smiles that private smile she has reserved for you as she approaches and gathers you into her arms for a hug. “Hola babe, did you see how well the team played?” she says to you, and you shake your head cause she will never take praise on her own game. 

As you push back from her you tell her “I have to say you look pretty good holding a baby love” 

She immediately blushes and pulls back as she says “Let me go shower and we can get out of here” She pecks your cheek and heads back towards the change room. 

The way she ignored the subject and changed the topic doesn’t sit right with you, but you chalk it up to it being not the right place to have this conversation. 

**

The following week, the team is off at an away game so you are home alone. You have an online design business you run from home, its nice to be able to have flexibility, but it also means you can go crazy at home alone for days on end. You often find your self out on walks. 

Its on this walk when you are walking through a park that you run into an old friend, Ana, and her 2 kids. You end up sitting with her chatting while the kids play on the park, when Alexia FaceTime's you. You check with your friend that you are good to pick up and when she nods you smile immediately at your love on the screen. 

“Hola love, rough day?” you immediately ask as you can see her siting in an ice bath. 

She shakes her head and with a small smile she says “I’m just getting too old for this.”

You laugh and turn the screen towards your friend “Babe, this is Ana, we used to work together and I ran into her and her kids at the park” Ana waves to her and offers her greetings, before Alexia can respond Ana has to get up and move over to one of her kids who was crying. 

“Im glad you found someone to talk to, I know how lonely you get at home when I'm gone” Alexia chimes in from your screen.

You bring your attention back to her and give her a small smile and say “You know, I wouldn’t be so lonely if we had someone else around to keep me company.”

She looks at you confused and asks “Nala isn’t enough you want another dog?” 

Shaking your head at her you say “No, I was thinking more along the human lines” 

You see Alexia freeze, then turn her head to the side, when she refocuses on you she immediately says “Lo siento, I have to go my times up in the ice bath. Te amo Mi amor” and she blows you a kiss and turns off the screen. 

You are again left with the feeling of Alexia not talking to you, and avoiding the questions. 

**

The following weekend you and Alexia are home with your 3 year old niece, your brother had texted asking if you could watch her for the afternoon/evening as him and his wife were going to a friends wedding. Alexia loves your niece and she loves her Tia Alexia too. 

You had been playing outside in the heat, when your niece had asked for ice cream, so you left them at home while you ran out to pick some up. When you walk back into your house it is dead silent and you are left wondering where they went. You walk into the living room and immediately your heart swells. 

Alexia is laid on her back on the couch, with your three year old niece cuddled into her chest, Alexia has both arms wrapped around her and they are both fast asleep. You quietly pull out your phone and take a picture of the 2 of them cuddled up like that. You sneak outside and settle on the patio couch to let them sleep. 

All you can think about is that you want a child with Alexia, but you do not know how to bring it up. You are so lost in thought you don’t hear your phone going off with a message from your brother saying they are on the way. It isn’t until the back door opens and Alexia pokes her head out asking “Y/N are you gonna come say bye?” 

You snap back to reality and smile at her and follow her into the house to say bye to your family as they prepare to take your niece home. 

Once they leave Alexia turns to you, and places her hands on your hips and asks “Is everything okay hermosa?” 

Shaking your head you respond “I think we need to talk about some stuff babe”

She leans in and places a kiss on your forehead and responds “I know, I’ll grab the wine and meet you out back?” 

You nod, but before she can pull away, you pull her back into you and press a deep kiss on her lips. When you pull back you whisper “I love you” 

“Te amo Hermosa” she replies with a quick peck to your lips before she pulls away and goes to grab the wine. 

You wonder back out to the back patio and settle on the couch, looking out at the stars. Alexia comes out and presses a wine glass in your hand and settles beside you. You feel her put her arm around your shoulders and you cuddle closer into her side. You savour this quiet moment with your love, but you cant help but feel like this conversation may change the 2 of you forever. 

After several minutes basking in the silent night you feel her press her lips to your forehead and you turn to look up at her. You get lost in the sparkle in your lovers eyes. “I don’t know how to start this conversation Ale” you get out with a small smile. 

She smiles down at you and pulls back though so you both are sitting up, she turns so she’s fully facing you she starts with “Baby, its me you know you can talk to me about anything” as she grabs your wine glass and places it on the table with hers. 

“I know babe, I’m just worried about this changing us” You tell her as you can’t meet her eyes. 

She places her knuckle under your chin and forces you to meet her eyes as she says “Baby, whatever it is, we will work through it together. I love you so much and nothing will change that” 

You give her a small smile and whisper back “I love you too, and I want to expand our family babe. Seeing you with all these babies makes my heart flutter and I want a little you to be able to love.”

She smiles and shakes her head and says “I know you do, you haven’t been subtle” 

At hearing this you reach out and smack her shoulder and say “Why wouldn’t you say something Ale, I have been trying to work up the nerve to this conversation for months” 

She laughs at you and responds “It’s cute seeing you get riled up” 

Shaking your head with a laugh you ask “So you haven’t been avoiding the conversation?” 

At this she pauses, and you can see the bravado and confidence she carries in the public finally drop. You are one of the only people who ever gets to see the real Alexia. Underneath all the fame she is just like the rest of us, unsure and insecure. Many would never know but you do, and you fell in love with both versions of your love. 

“Babe, look at me” you tell her, when she meets your eyes, you place your hand on her cheek and ask “what’s been going through that pretty little head of yours?”

She takes a deep breath and says “I don’t know how to do this.”

“You don’t know how to do what, love?” you ask her softly.

You give her a moment, when she responses it in one of the softest voices you have ever heard from her “Have a baby, I don’t know what I’m doing with babies and I’m scared they would hate me” she finishes with tears in her eyes.

Your heart cracks open at the insecure tone in your loves voice, you lean forward and use your thumbs to wipe her tears as you say in a soft tone “Babe, I don’t know what I’m doing either. At the end of the day it doesn’t matter, what matters is that I know I will love this baby with everything I have cause it will remind me of you” 

She breaks down at this and you pull her into your arms and let her tuck her self under your chin. You rub your hands up and down her back until she starts to calm down. You adjust both of you so you are on your back and she is lying on top of you. You settle into the quiet of the night sky as you continue to rub her back and play with her hair. 

“I think I could love a baby, if they were apart of you.” you hear her whisper to you. 

You smile and press a kiss to the top of her head as you say “Well I for one think you would be the best mama to any children we have” 

She presses her self up at this so you can look into her eyes as she says “I love you Y/N. Are we going to do this?” 

You smile and nod and ask “Only if your sure love?”

She leans closer and says “Babe, the only thing Im sure of is you, and the fact that you will be the best mother in the world.”

“So thats a yes?” you ask and she nods. You shake your head and ask “Love, I need you to verbalise this for me” 

“Y/N, I love you and I cannot wait to have a baby with you.” she says with a smile. 

You smile back and whisper “I love you Ale” and you finally close the gap between the two of you and press your lips to hers. 

#alexia putellas imagine #alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas #woso imagine #woso x reader #woso #espwnt x reader

[legolasghosty]

Okay but if I go into your inbox and ask for more zombie apocalypse au would that work??? ;D

Alright, but you quite literally asked for it, so don't blame me if this gets crazy!

For those of you who have been politely ignoring my madness, this is in reference to a post canon type zombie apocalypse au. You can read part 1 and part 2 of me spewing randomness about it on those links if you're interested! I blame Inny and whoever that anon was for enabling me.

Soooo I thought we might start this one by looking at the bit that started this whole tangent: Julie and the guys finding zombies of the boy's bodies.

Listen, they don't really see the apocalypse coming, no one does. So, a couple of months after the Orpheum, following many long conversations and stuff, Julie finds where the guys are buried and they all go to visit. It feels both very right, to pay their respects and all, and very wrong, cause visiting your own grave is just creepy, okay?!

Flynn is driving(cause there's no way Julie was up to learning to drive while struggling with losing her mom, even if she has turned 16 by this point), and the ghosts are being antsy in the back seat. Julie turns on the radio, but all the stations keep getting interrupted by some news people yelling about whatever crisis is happening now. Weird. So they just switch to the aux and Julie starts playing old 90s music. The boys appreciate it. Flynn is less of a fan.

They get to the graveyard just as the music gets cut off by Ray calling Julie. That's... not normal. Usually he texts unless it's urgent. Well, once his kids actually taught him how to actually write text messages, not whole emails in a text bubble.

Ray is like, COME HOME NOW, STUFF IS WEIRD AND THERE'S ZOMBIES!!! Julie thinks he's messing with her, cause like... zombies? Really? Everyone knows those aren't real. Flynn points out that everyone thinks ghosts aren't real either while googling it. And oh frick... maybe they should have paid more attention to those breaking news reports.

Look, I don't know how zombie infections start, okay? Haven't really figured that one out yet. But my general theory for this AU is that whatever chemical does it got into some kind of groundwater supply, and thus is in the dirt. It latches on to forms that still harbor some level of organic matter. Or something. I don't know. It's too late to be doing the science of zombies. Regardless, it's infecting dead bodies and the graveyard they are at is much closer to the source than home.

Reggie screams when the first one scrambles out of the ground behind him. Those first few are the newly dead ones, cause they still have the most organic matter attached and the dirt on top of them isn't as packed down from decades of being stepped on.

Alex panics and summons part of his drum kit right on top of it, crushing and killing it. They all kinda stare at it for a second, and then everything gets nuts. More zombies start climbing up from the ground. Flynn may or may not light a couple of them on fire with her mom's lighter. Look, she doesn't really smoke much anymore, but having the lighter around makes her feel better for whatever reason. Flynn doesn't get it but she also doesn't question it.

It's a small graveyard so they manage to take out most of the zombies fairly quickly, once they get over their initial shock... but then they see another zombie forcing its way up. It has a tattered beanie and they can see bones sticking out of its flesh where it has rotted away. And it's not Luke. They all know it's not. But even Luke himself is a bit stunned by the appearance of his own dead body.

Reggie and Alex zombies are coming up behind Luke. Figures that Luke would be the first one up. And none of them really know what to do. Cause, yeah they're zombies, but also, they're the guys???

But then Luke gets between zombie him and Julie and she realizes that, regardless of what the zombie looks like or who the body used to belong to, it's not him. Cause, ghost or not, Luke is standing right there, dead and breathing and trembling a bit in his beat up vans. So she does what any logical person would do: She grabs a big stick(or a shovel lying nearby or something, I don't know) and smacks zombie Luke over the head with it. Hard.

They take out the zombie boys and get in the car. (Reggie may or may not beat up zombie him with his bass.) They take off towards home just as fast as they can. Cause...what else do you do when zombies are suddenly real?

But it does make them sure of one thing: Zombies aren't people. Their souls aren't tied to their corpses, even though said corpses are moving again.

OKAY TIME FOR SOME FLUFFIER STUFF NOW THAT WE HAVE THAT OUT OF THE WAY!!!

The ghosts all start leaving notes and writing stuff down for the non-Julie lifers when she's not around to translate. However, none of them really expected both Carlos and Ray to start leaving notes back. Carlos's are mainly for Reggie, asking random ghost questions and making dumb jokes. Ray leaves notes for all three of them(plus Willie when they find them), usually asking apocalypse type questions or asking if they can get some supply item on their next run, but sometimes it's just random questions about themselves. And all of them get a note at least once a week or so that just says, "Thank you for taking care of my little girl."

Julie figures out how to get zombie guts out of clothing mainly for Alex, who got set off into a full on panic attack when some got on his hoodie. It wasn't really about the hoodie of course, but still. It wasn't that much more complicated than getting blood out of clothes, thank goodness. Alex hugged Julie for like a full five minutes when she gave it back to him, mostly gut free.

The ghosts struggle to actually make physical contact with the zombies, similar to other life or life adjacent forms. Thus they're not the best in a physical fight. However, Reggie gets really good at finding heavy stuff to drop on top of them. Hey, when you're not a living being, you don't have to worry so much about little things like how heavy that box is.

The gang develops a point system for zombie killing. It's mostly the ghosts and kids doing it, in an attempt to bring some humor into a terrifying situation. Bigger zombies are worth more, as are taking out a bunch at once, combo kills, or a takedown that's just objectively cool. Points can be cashed in for random stuff like first dibs on food or specific coveted positions in the cuddle piles they fall into at night.

Speaking of cuddle piles, they become very common, cause with everything going on, Julie, Flynn, and Carlos all start having a really hard time falling asleep alone. The ghosts do as well, but they tend to brush it off more since sleep isn't a biological necessity for them. Thus, cuddle piles become a pretty normal thing to help them all fall asleep.

Okayyyy it's after midnight and this is kinda long, so I'm gonna call that good for now and attempt slumber. Hope y'all enjoyed, or at least are not annoyed at me for once again talking too much about a random AU idea.

(Send me an AU and I'll give you 5+ headcanons about it!)

#legolas tag #legolas answers asks #julie and the phantoms #jatp zombie apocalypse au

[crowning-art]

TGCF SPOILERS FINALE!

Me and 10 cuties who have been keeping up with my crazy TGCF journey after i finally finished it 2 years later lmaoo

*Note that clown in the center is me and everyone knows why after seeing my wonderful, beautiful, RIDICULOUS AND OUTLANDISH theories throughout the read lmaoo

Without further ado...the finale!!

-------------------------------------------------------

Goushi really swooped in during the LAST TWO SECONDS of this huge novel and really just stole everyone's heart, huh? I love this dude

In the last second, a hand caught Feng Xin’s boot, and Feng Xin caught Mu Qing’s boot. When he looked up, he cried, “WHAT THE FUCK!!! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!! GUOSHI OLD SIR, PLEASE DON’T EVER LET GO, ALRIGHT!!!”

YOOO FENG XIN ACCEPTED HIS CHILD OH MY GODDD DJJDJDJDJF T-T THE CHARACTER GROWTH

THE WAY THE TABLES HAVE TURNED AHHHHH its now Xie Lian who has Jun Wu pinned and nailed down to the ground with a sword djdjdjjdjjd low key, Xie Lian really needed to do that....yknow....therapeutically lol

I love this so much cuz ya, at the end of the day, it's tiring, it's exhausting keeping up a facade and forcing yourself to be someone who u know really isn't you and I feel Jun Wu despite all he's done was very heavily a product of his situation.

“I just genuinely really miss Your Highness,” Guoshi said. “I miss the once-Kingdom of Wuyong,

I miss our people, and I miss the days before we ascended. That’s all.”

“…”

Guoshi then added, “It’s been so many years, Your Highness. Just watching you makes me tired. Very tired. How about you? Are you not exhausted?”

And yes, I get that there was still a bit of inherit evil within him which got amplified thanks to the wuyong problems but like at the end of the day, he's just a sad little meow meow

AND THEN

AND THEN

“…Have I been defeated?” Jun Wu sounded a little lost.

After a moment of silence, Xie Lian took off the bamboo hat carried on his back, took it in his hand, and covered it over Jun Wu’s face.

DJDIFNIFJFJFJFJ DO I EVEN HAVE TO SAY IT AGAIN??? HJDHDHFHFHF U KNOW WHAT IM GONNA SAY AND UGH ITS ALWAYS BACK TO THE ✨️THEMES OF KINDNESS AND LOVE✨️ BRB gonna cry some more AGAIN

Ahh I remember pointing this out a while back but Hua Cheng was always the ONLY one who really helped ground Xie Lian when he was lost and confused. Like the split emotions he kept feeling of not knowing whether to laugh or cry, all gone even when he's told the craziest news yet, aka Wu Ming identity

All of a sudden, thousands of emotions, millions of words swarmed into his head. There was gratefulness, there was shame, there was heartache, there was wild joy, but above all else, there was incurable love.

Lol u guys don't even get it, there were so many parts that were my fave here and I was trying my best to not post the whole chapter here cuz i loved EVERY part, the way Xie Lian leaped into Hua Chengs arm at the end, the cute Xianle trio bickering, just everything T-T

WTF U MEAN LIL BREAK I DO NOT NEED THIS RN PLZ DONT OH MY GODOHMYGODOHMYGOS HUA CHENG DONT U DARE DIE OH MYGOD

All of this:

Hua Cheng’s long and slender fingers gently combed through Xie Lian’s mussed hair. “Then, Your Highness, do you know why I refuse to leave this world?”

Xie Lian couldn’t understand why Hua Cheng could still be so calm at a time like this, as he was panicking so hard he was trembling. But, while feeling lost, he still simple-mindedly asked,

“Why?”

Hua Cheng replied quietly, “Because I have a beloved who is still in this world.”

Hua Cheng said quietly, “Your Highness, I understand your everything.

“Your courage, your despair; your kindness, your pain; your resentment, your hate; your intelligence, your foolishness.

“If I could, I would have you use me as your stepping stone, the bridge you take apart after crossing, the corpse bones you need to trample to climb up, the sinner who deserved the butchering of a million knives. But, I know you wouldn’t allow it.”

They really did invent love, I can't think of anything else to say to this 😭

HIS EXPRESSION MY HEART CRACKED INTO A MILLION PIECES AT THIS WHOLE SCENE BUT ESPECIALLY AT THIS LINE

Hua Cheng’s gaze was gentle and blazing, that remaining eye filled with love, and it gazed at him silently.

He's gonna be back for sure. The red string and the ashes are still there....but it's still soooo saaad

LMAOOO the heavenly officials became homeless fr I'm dying lmaoooo

ROUYE IS BACK YESSSS!!! AND UGHH XIANLE TRIO!! IM SO HAPPY THEY R TOGETHER AGAIN!! I MISSED THIER SHENANIGENS SO MUCH

Xie Lian rummaged around his sleeve and fumbled out a white silk band that was torn in half, and said joyously, “Yeah, finally, the material to fix Ruoye is found! I’ll go patch it up right now!”

However, Feng Xin stopped him. “Patch it up? You?! Forget it, what can you patch? Ask someone else to help you.” Then he turned his head and shouted, “MU QING! COME GET TO WORK!”

Pei Su and Banyue were really an underrated duo this whole book, especially with the way they guarded Ke Mo and the other ghosts lol

Pei Su and Banyue were sitting at the entrance, both of their expressions blank.

Feng Xin divorce arc lmaooo Finally it came to an end...and in a really nice and mature way. I really appreciated the way MXTX wrote Jian Lan's whole character, like she also grew as a person and is def underappreciated

However, Jian Lan withdrew her smile. “What you’ve said are all things of the past. What was love once doesn’t mean it’ll last. I’m not interested in being a charity case and a nuisance.”

And Xuan Ji! Everyone really grew up huh? (*sobbing incontrollably*)

Still don't like Pei Ming smh overgrown man child fr U go Yushi Huang for showing him whose boss!!

GUZIIII MY HEART NOOOOO I really respect LQQ for doing this

so I could only…gather a bit of the soul particles of the Green Ghost and keep them in a lamp. Now he shows up in front of me every day hugging that lamp, asking when the soul within the lamp will grow bigger! I really…”

And Guzi! Fret not! Qi Rong will be back cuz his ashes aren't destroyed!!

THE PEARLS ARE BASICALLY A GIFT FROM THE INLAWS THAT HUA CHENG HAS NOW DJJDJDJDJDJDJFJDJD

A moment later, Xie Lian nodded slowly. “It’s mine. It’s a pair of pearls my father and mother gave me when I was young.”

Lol Ling Wen's punishment thooo and the subtle hint that Ling Wen may have acc cared for the dude despite everything kinda warms my heart

Ling Wen gave a small laugh. “Your Highness, don’t say it like I would do anything for him. After all, I’m cold-blooded and recognize no loved ones, so why would I do anything like that?”

“Is that right?”

“Let it be.

I love love love the way the passage of time was described here God I don't know how to explain it but I love it

People came like the tide, then left like the tide. Mount Taicang regained its deserted lonesomeness.

Atop Mount Taicang, there used to be an enormous field of maple trees. They were all burnt down by that massive fire, but reborn after a thousand years. They were no longer the same ones Xie Lian leapt through to train once upon a time, but the landscape was the same.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASAASASSMXKXKXJXNCJXNX AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

With three thousand Blessings Lanterns rising along with the night behind him, that man turned back and gazed at him. Robes redder than maple, skin as white as snow; between the brows of a face so handsome it couldn’t be stared at, there was still that wildness and a feral aura, a proudness that couldn’t be cut down.

There were no words. Both started walking towards the other.

A step, another step, each step faster than the next, then finally, they started running.

He ran forward whilst tears fell and stayed behind him. Xie Lian voiced this in his heart: he believed.

He believed that this man would die for him again and again, and would be reborn for him over and over. Even if he fell into the depths of hell, he would break through the abyss for his “belief”.

Last time, they spent eight hundred years running towards each other.

This time, it only took an instant to fall into each other’s embrace.

DID I CRY HERE? U BET YOUR FUNKY LIL BEAN I DID And u don't get get AGUHH it took 1000 pages for them to get to where they were AND ONLY ONE PAGE TO MEET AGAIN THE ABSOLUTE POETIC METAPHOR HAS ME LOSING MY MIND u have to read through 244 chaps to see them trying to get to each other and when they finally do..it takes less than a page for them to reunite again I AM CRYING RN

The grand final banquet in Puqi shrine, with windmaster and the fellow beggars, he xuan secretly eating with them, fengqing arguing and bantering (flirting basically -_-), heaven's eye, hualian, the heavenly officials dropping by, just everyone finally living a happy life

What a story! Like what a story! Unbelievable!

This is how it started and this is how it ended

However, if people worship the divine statues of this one god and one ghost together, then there will be a miracle

Cuz their whole story is a miracle but that's the point! U can't give up! Xie Lian's story IS inspirational despite being fictional! Believing in your principles and doing the right thing, showing kindness no matter the circumstance, and growing from adversities, honestly I had so much to say but I read the post script and lmao MXTX said EVERYTHING I wanted to say!

-------------------

I'm always the kind to finish books within a day or two but I really didn't want this one to end (hence two years to read it) but God the whole experience was so incredible and tbh, I started documenting my thoughts for myself just so I can reread them later and laugh lmao but then a bunch of you guys kept up with it and it genuinely became such an exciting thing to look forward to after reading as well!!

Special shout out to @silvia-moon and @maause who were there from the beginning!! I loved every comment of yours and had a blast reading them every time 🥰

Ahhhh IM GETTING SO EMOTIONAL LIKE THIS LONG WINDING JOURNEY HAS FINALLY COME TO AN END 😭 (borderline tearing up while writing this post) but alas! Every banquet must come to an end (haha see what I did there? Hahaha....😭😭😭)

And of course there are the extras! But those shall be read some other day! In the meantime, I'm so so excited to get to drawing all my fave scenes!! I can't wait to get to that!

Until then,

Farewell 😊

#tian guan ci fu #tgcf #heaven’s official blessings #hua cheng #heaven's official blessings spoilers #tgcf spoilers #tgcf journey #xie lian #hualian #ch 240-end #Acc tho #what a journey #i cant wait for a reread #i wont be documenting that tho lol #ahhhh i know i already said this but thanks to all the cute ppl who kept up with this!! #i seriously had such a delightful time! #to the repeat likers of my posts #the commenters #the private messagers #silent readers #i love you all #wow #just a perfect finale #now i just gotta patiently wait for the final few vols to get the physical copies! #gotta pass this down to MY future generation some way lmao

[aspookybitchesthoughts]

Kenny Rant

This got really long. I’m sorry.

I wanna talk about Kenny because he’s my favourite. And he’s a silly little guy. I may be projecting a teensy bit but Im just going to scream into the void and you can listen if you want.

Kenny is Cartman’s best friend. Kenny is Butters’ best friend. These can coexist.

Kenny is not saving Butters from Cartman. 2 Reasons:

1. Butters is not an uwu boi who needs protecting. He’s an asshole who’s a little too trusting sometimes.

2. Kenny is not some flirty strong dude-bro. He’s an asshole and a quiet kid who’s just happy to be included.

That’s not to say that I don’t ship Bunny. I do (sue me). but more like a teacher who seats two kids next to each other because they’d be cute together, than as an actual canon ship.

Another thing real quick is Kenjorine. I do wish people would give Marjorine more of Butters’ personality, but someone’s take was that in the episode “Marjorine” Butters never wanted to be Marjorine, therefore she’s just used as a love interest for Kenny, is objectively wrong. Yes Marjorine was Cartman’s idea. Yes Butters was hesitant. But no one can deny how happy Butters looked as Marjorine and the fun she had. Is Marjorine hyperfeminized? Yes absolutely, and it is annoying. But headcanons are okay! Transfem Butters who goes by Marjorine, Genderfluid Butters who can go by Marjorine, etc, yes go for it! But claiming Marjorine is NOT Butters and JUST a love interest for Kenny? :/ Its all fun and games here. Let people have fun and games.

Anyway, back to Kenny because no one understands him like I do.😔

(again, yelling into the void these are my opinions. you can characterize him however you want he’s not real)

KENNY IS NOT A FLIRTY WHORE. He is kind of a pervert who probably had unrestricted internet access and found porn waaaaayyyy to early. But that does not mean he’s a total slut who will sleep around with anyone and everyone. On a similar note, he’s also not mr. popular either. He’s a quiet kid. He doesn’t talk a lot and often fades into the background. He enjoys hanging out with Stan, Kyle, and Cartman. I can only think of one time he willing chose not to hangout with Cartman. He enjoys it! He loves going along with they’re crazy shenanigans! He loves to be included. Because if he’s not included, he’s forgotten about. He dies all the time and no one remembers. He misses out on so much. I’m sure he feels really left out sometimes. (If you like the someone remembers headcanon), does anyone ever catch him up on what happened after he dies?

Imma leave that question there and move on. Kenny is obviously a wonderful brother who cares deeply about his family. However I really wish the show touched more on his relationship with Kevin. Do they bond over shared trauma? Or grow apart because of how similar Kevin is to their father? I like to think that they’re close. But they likely aren’t.

Slight switch. Another characterization I see a lot is that Kenny is a crackhead or similar. I really don’t think Kenny would do a lot of drugs. He lived in a household that had a meth lab in the back yard and his parents were almost always drunk or high. I don’t think he would want that for himself. I know there’s that one episode where he gets high on cat piss and daffodils or something. That’s there. It exists. I know. I would like to think he would have some character development between 8 years old and the typical 16-21 years he’s usually aged up to. I don’t know though, it was never mentioned again. You’re entitled to your own opinion but I just don’t think he’d stick with it.

I think imma stop here. Theres more I could say and I could probably make a whole other post on Mysterion alone but I’ll only do that if it’s asked for.

#kenny mccormick #sp kenny #south park #spooky thoughts #idk how to tag this #idk how to end a post lol #sp cartman #sp butters #sp marjorine #eric cartman #leopold butters stotch #kyle brovlofski #stan marsh

[hughungrybear]

Me watching Laws of Attraction Ep. 8 (Final EP):

1. Well, well, well up until the end, this series is trying hard to make me believe that either Charn is going to betray Tin or Charn will end up sacrificing himself to death. I would believe neither lol. I have seen this type of plot before. This ain't my first lakorn 😂😂😂

2. Gawd damn. At first glance, I thought Charn was offering a bottle of soy sauce to his mum 😂😂😂

3. Oooh. I guess they will do a live on Thattep's crimes. Side note: Silvy looks good.

4. Navin is all types of mental 😂 Even if Tin has some training in professional fighting, I don't think Navin, with all his craziness, will go down easily lol 😅 He is a gangster, after all.

5. I guess the ring DOES have power (forgive me for the LOTR pun 😅)

6. Sorry, that does not looked anything like an airplane (or an airport) 😅😅😅

7. Oooh. TinThee team up. Interesting... 🤝🤝🤝

8. I knew it! They will try to do a live feed on what will happen inside the warehouse.

9. You know, this all would have been avoided if Thattep was a bit smarter and did not kill that reporter outright. Or tried to frame up his own son. Then changed his story to the gardener stealing that car. Finally, ofc, Charn is going to double cross you 😂😂😂 For a supposedly smart politician, Thattep isn't all that lol.

10. Now, him and his goons are hunting Charn in warehouse. Really? After knowing they are the main characters in a live stream??? If Charn is killed inside the warehouse during that feed, then what does Thattep think would happen? Stupid, stupid man. 🤨🤨🤨

11. I guess Charn stopped being bulletproof. 😵 But, I still don't believe Charn will end up dead after this. Why? Because the villain didn't shoot him in the head. Lol. Again, Thattep is a stupid idiot! 😂😂😂😂

12. Oh, Charn is still bulletproof (with a real bulletproof vest). I guess he really does learn from his past mistakes lol.

13. Thee, stop being dramatic. Tan will surely come back lol. <after five seconds> See? Lol Tan made use of his famous tantrums and got banned from riding an airplane 😂😂😂

14. Charn playing the spoiled brat lol. The fvck. You are lucky, Tin dare not slap you 😂😂😂

15. Grandma KNOWS. Lol.

16. Why do you even care, Tan? Let your father rot in jail 😑

17. I cannot with Charn 😂😂😂😂😂 he made Tin a subservient househusband lol

18. The post-its remind me of Bad Buddy. Yes, BBS is in my blood. Get over it 😅😅😅😅

19. In a sense, this series does not only follow the classic lakorn plot, but the classic BL too (with one of the main characters singing for some reason) 😅

20. There he goes, like he swallowed the volumes of law books, before agreeing to marry Tin. 🤣🤣🤣

21. Navin, still crazy as always lol.

22. Waiiit. How did Thattep became the big boss inside the prison? Just because he used to be a politician? Because he's got money to pay everyone? And look, he still has the guts to threaten Charn inside the cell. Wth. But then again, Charn's smile is devious. Lol.

23. <after five seconds> That's what I'm talking about. Good riddance, Thattep.

24. Oooh. Wedding photos. 😊 Cute. I guess in this universe, same-sex marriage is legal in Thailand.

25. Thee and Tan are also free, with added bonus as Tan is Thattep's sole heir.

26. Ngl, I'm not feeling Charn's wedding fit. <after five seconds> nvm, it has a coat lol. That would work.

27. As always, Grandma is the ship's biggest cheerleader 😂

Despite having a plot that heavily borrows from old lakorns, this series is still enjoyable. I also like Film's (Charn) acting. His smile is creepy and devious whenever it needs to be. Also, they had let us listen to Silvy's golden voice more than once. What more can I ask for? 😁

On to the next series, then - either To Sir with Love or I Can Feel You Linger in the Air.

#laws of attraction #laws of attraction ep 8 #tincharn #laws of attraction final ep

[dizzygrizzz]

matthew tkachuk fic idea

My shower thoughts from like 2 days ago after rereading ‘Looking Through You’ by nordalanche. Matthew during his childhood to spite his father he decides to learn how to figure skate, Chanel lets him learn since its less worrying about hockey injuries. He gets good at figure skating that he’s winning Worlds and other tournaments, but ultimately he chooses to stick with hockey. So around the age 16-18 Matthew focuses on hockey, he still figure skates but stopped competing around 16/17. I can also see Matthew using his moms maiden name as a way to separate the two sports, since he didn't want to get any flack for figure skating. During his time in the NHL he still figure skates and what not, but a bit before the 2022 Beijing Olympics the USA team needed another skater due to someone dropping out due to something like illness, injury or him owing Nathan Chen a favour. So come time for the Olympics, he tells the front office about him participating in the Olympics and wanting to try and keep it a secret. The Tkachuk family knows Matthew leaving for the Olympics and also is in his “lie” of some injury or illness. The office tells him congrats and to say he will be out week to week. 

Come Olympics time, Matthew is competing and what not and an interaction he has with Yuzuru Hanyu earlier in the week during a warm up goes viral and Matthew the figure skater goes viral. The figure skating community is going crazy about this guy who hasn't competed in 6 years and he’s somehow at the Olympics. More of Twitter going crazy when it comes out that they’re friends since they have trained together since they have the same coach. Closer to the long program it finally comes out that Matthew is at the Olympics as a figure skater and the hockey world just shuts down. Matthew is getting texts and everything from friends and news outlets, Brady is also getting bombarded with questions, but he just posts on his insta or story of Matthew figure skating with a heart emoji. 

I imagine when Matthew is asked during an interview during the Olympics he white lies about his career and other stuff, but it comes out he competed because he owed Nathan a favour. I also see cameras panning to Matthew in the arena watching the Men’s hockey team cheering.

Old videos of Matthew competing comes out and multiple players just have a gay panic for Matthew as he is completely different figure skating compared to being off the ice or playing hockey. Matthew gets bronze woo! and finally posts something on him competing and thanking the USA team and the organization for allowing him to compete as a last minute add in. Comes back home gets love from his family, friends and fans. The hockey and figure skating community collide because of Matthew.

I imagine that he was also voted in to the All Star Game last minute once he comes back home, since his popularity boomed within the community. Matthew rocks the All Star Game and ends up performing one of his programs in full fit.

Somehow this ends up with Leon and Matthew dating, I don’t know how, but they do.

#matthew tkachuk #leon draisaitl #olympics #brady tkachuk #mattdrai

[onyourhyuck]

So I just want to clarify that I'm not a creepy old woman I'm 22 years old and my daughter is 2 lol

I decided to send another ask about areum's pregnancy and this is going to be LONG and I think I will have to send more than one, SORRY. Also how you described areum in the last chapter was really accurate, I was lucky to not get nauseous but it's really common, and yes omg I cried over the smallest things I could feel areum when she cried after getting scolded by haechan and jaemin

My pregnancy in the start was pretty chill physically cause I didn't felt anything but it depends from person to person. I think when my belly started to grow it was when it really hit me and I was like omg I'm really pregnant, since I was in denial like areum. First thing: cravings, I didn't craved for crazy things but it can happen I just wanted ice cream ALL THE TIME I ate a loooot of candys and chocolate. And there's a rollercoaster of emotions, one moment you're like "get tf out of here I don't want to see anyone" and then you're "I just want cuddles and ice cream" and then its "I need a dick inside of me right NOW" and it changes really fast. Physically the main change is the bump, at first it's really cute and you love it but the more it grows the more you suffer, it's heavy and it's crazy cause its something inside you so you always feel heavy, but as the time passes you get used to it. And back pain, a LOT of back pain, really I had to sit all the time with something supporting my back when my belly was big. But the good thing was feeling my baby kicking my belly, I loved to put my hand on it and feel her I couldn't wait to see her face, but sometimes she kicked my ribs and my organs and it was really painfull. Also one moment my self esteem would be so high cause I was glowing (pregnancy leaves the skin so smooth) and then it dropped to the center of the earth cause I felt fat. And since your fics has smut, when the belly is big you can only have sex in doggy position or spooning, there's no other way, that's the most comfortable, and actually have sex in the last days of pregnancy helps to dilate so its pretty good. One more thing, walking calmly thought the city, going to a park or anywhere that has nature is healing, I loved to do that and I lowkey liked to show off my big bump (even tho I was 19 but people thought I was 16 and gave me weird looks cause I looked like a kid). In general it's hard but its also so good, I had a lot of worries like "will she be healthy? Will I make thought this?" But I had my boyfriend and my family supporting and helping me and I was so happy, I'm sure jisung and jeno (he's alive I feel it) will be there for areum and I hope the guys will too

Sorry for talking (writing) too much and I still have to write and send you about the birth and post birth omg

Don’t apologise for writing such amazing detailed helpful answers and sharing your experience! You’re so brave to go through pregnancy, honestly, I think I admire you even more now. Pregnancy is probably one of the things people will go through at least once in their life and you’re basically…just creating another life form, I think what you did is very beautiful no matter how old! Things like this happens even if you do have safe sex 😭😭 I know someone who used a condom but ended up pregnant anyways which is… really worrying to think about, must’ve been a really bad condom brand— but in the end the couple are really happy and are ready to be parents.

I’m really glad you reassured me about the accuracy so far! I asked my mother for help by asking for her symptoms. She gave birth twice and they were VERYY different. My mom when she was pregnant with me craved lots of meat(?) and she wasn’t necessarily having a pregnancy glow up with me 🥲 she had a very low self esteem and had massive temper LMFAO, so yeah, however when she was pregnant with my brother she was glowing— had like smooth skin, she didn’t really get too big which she was very glad for. My mom craved tons of sweets like you did when you were pregnant!

I’m really glad you were being supported by your family and your boyfriend🥺🫶🏻 it’s always good to have someone having your back and all.

I’ll definitely be screenshooting your answer and then saving it on my phone for later purposes, i have so much inspiration from your experience and ideas. Such as “going outside is very healing”, I can definitely imagine areum jeno, jaemin, jisung or haechan to go outside with her. Areum would get belly rubs from jenooooo. I can imagine jeno also brushing areum’s hair softly and trying his best to braid or do a ponytail when areum is really big in her pregnancy!

Thank you so much again for sharing your own personal experience and benefits for the fic in the future! 😩😩 you’re a life saviour, I’m glad so far this is accurate because it really does depend on person to person~~ thank you!!! I love you! ❤️

#answered asks

[tqotsx3]

When you get this, you have to answer with 5 things you like about yourself, publicly. Then send this ask to 10 of your favourite followers. (not forced ofc)

hey sorry i fell off the face of the earth cause WOWIE i took a while to see this, ive just been busy with school and some other stuff

also i love this prompt! i dont really think about myself often but i should appreciate who i am more! and i think people should appreciate who they are and the joy they bring into the world more too!!

i dont know how id pick just 10 of my favorite followers (they are all so cool), so if you follow me and ur reading this, if you wanna you should also take some time to appreciate yourself and post 5 things you like about yourself

ok ill stop stalling

Being able to tell when i did something wrong - part of the reason it took me so long to even respond to this was because i was in the process of reconciling with my old friend group. I had left about two years prior because i fell in love with my best friend and had gotten rejected, and at the time i was devastated, so much so that i pretty much cut contact with all of my friends from that group. I lived off of mainly spite and shame for what had happened for about 1 year, after which i tried connecting with other people at my school. this eventually led me to figuring out my gender and really looking at how my feelings had shifted over the years that I was gone, and while i felt much less angry, i still couldn't bring myself to join back. atleast, not until i saw a viral tweet from one of the friends of that group, which made me realize that by leaving the group i had missed so much, and they had missed so much of my life too. I joined back with my friends on december 1st, which i will remember fondly for the rest of my life. i know what i did was wrong now, and i consider leaving the biggest regret of my life so far. but just like that, i also consider rejoining one of the greatest joys i have ever experienced. i guess what im trying to say is that i know i mess up, like all the time about a lot of things, but i think im pretty good about owning up to that and admitting my mistakes.

2. Lack of Shame - oh boy what a great thing to follow up my trauma dump, lets go full horny now!! ok not really, but ever since i realized i was trans ive kinda let go of any shame about my body image or what i enjoy sexually. when i was a kid i used to fucking hate myself for being overweight, thinking i was wrong and i needed to lose weight constantly. and then when i got older, i also did that but for a porn addiction i thought i had (which later turned out to be my gender dysphoria manifesting but i didnt know that for another like 8 years). and now i dont bash myself for these things, its so nice to live my life without judging myself for every little thing that i perceived as wrong with myself. looking back on it, its kinda crazy since a majority of the things i hated about myself i never really had a problem with, it was moreso that there was a strict societal standard that wormed its way into my skull and made me think i was inferior when i really just wasnt. so anyway i hornypost 24/7 to all my friends and theyve all gotten tired of it (in a joking way, ofc if any of them were actually uncomfortable with me doing that I would respect that and stop immediately). anyways i need to be bred to death like a female axolotl

3. kindness - i sure hope i am!!! i try pretty hard to be nice to people and to make sure everyone around me knows theyre loved and appreciated and that they bring in so much joy to the people around them and to the world in general!!! at the end of the day i want everyone to be happy!!! on that note i need to get into the habit of saying this more but FREE PALESTINE!!! i cant really hope that everyones happy without condemning a literal genocide happening

4. curiosity and a lil ambition - i like learning things!! and i like that i like to learn things!! ive been happy going to school and learning about topics that interest me (mainly chemistry and computer science) and im glad that i have an interest in learning cause this world is so fucking cool and i want to learn how it works!!!!!

5. direction - and after all that has happened, after all my struggles and my losses, and my victories and my epiphanies, im just so proud of myself for finally knowing who i really am. there were times when i was alone where i would wonder if i would ever be happy, if i would ever figure out what i was supposed to be doing. i dont think i would ever have expected my life to be at this point and i am just so happy that i finally get to enjoy my life. I hope that everyone i ever know and everyone i ever dont gets to experience this too.

if you see this, just know that you are invaluable and awesome to have around. know that if you are lost, you will find who you are one day, you'll know what you want to do, where you want to go, who you want to be.

much love to you all.

[financialsmatter]

Sunday Funnies, If You're Not Offended...

Welcome back to this week’s edition of the Sunday Funnies where, last week we heard: (From the Pentagon…a trusted source…LOL!) How Russia sabotaged its own Nord Stream 2 pipeline Stinky Joe say for all to hear:  “She was 12 and I was 30” referring to a young girl he “knew.” Pelosi saying “illegals need to be bussed to Florida to pick crops.” Italy’s new Prime Minister (Giorgia Meloni) labeled “worse than Mussolini.” How a transgender high school ‘wood shop teacher’ is gaming the system with massive fake boobs for young boys to oogle over. Kamala Harris telling the world we have a strategic alliance with NORTH KOREA. A Transgender Army Major and his/her/its wife were caught passing secrets to the Russians That INFLATION is under control…LMAO! And that’s only a partial list the bizzarro events we’re seeing every day.       And speaking of bizzarro events…     Needless to say, that boys in shop class these days face more danger than in the past due to (Ahem!) distractions. And speaking of distractions, events in 2022 are looking like this year will be the king of all distractions for anyone wanting to hide from the truth (Cough! Democrats, Cough! Cough!). But that’s why we continue to post memes for your reading AND distraction pleasure.     And that’s also another reason why we publish the Sunday Funnies. You see, we use our funnies/memes/cartoons in an effort to counter the madness and frustration that accompanies Turbulent Times. Because when it’s all said and done, we all need to laugh every now and then. Why? Laughter is good for your soul. And it’s healthy to be a bit silly…especially in the face of fear mongering, medical tyranny, and especially the threat of WWIII. It’s all the more reason why we won’t apologize…especially if our Funnies just happen to hurt some Progressive/Socialist/Communist/Globalist’s feeeellwwings. And please remember: The Sunday Funnies are not just about our nations bizarre state of politics/finance/beliefs. It’s about awareness of what’s happening in the world that we choose to poke fun at. And, if our funnies/memes/cartoons/etc. provide you with a laugh or two – and/or open your eyes to some stark realities – then we consider that a victory. So, when things tend to get a bit overwhelming, we believe it’s best to remember that Humor is Waaaayyyyy better than Hatred…which is contrary to what the world wants you to believe. And we hope you see the Sunday Funnies as a refreshing oasis in the middle of a parched, dry, and increasingly dark world that we’re living in. As always, we remind you: As difficult as things might appear, Evil Always Overplays its Hand…And Righteousness Prevails. Thanks again for joining us on this crazy journey we’re on and remember America Was Built by the Brave, Not by the Fearful… ************************************* How Did Randy Travis Know That?     *********************************** Is She Really That Stupid, Or is She Trying to Out Gaffe Stinky Joe?       ************************************ Girls Today Never Imagined Having to Compete With a Shop Teacher for Attention…         *********************************** Young Boys On Their First Day Back at School       ************************************ When You’re Accused of Over Reacting But Then…       ************************************** Only Older People Will Understand This…Millennials, Ask Your Parents/Grandparents       ************************************* Millennials, Ask Your Parents/Grandparents About This Too       ************************************** Again, Check With Your Parents/Grandparents On One of the Simple Pleasures of Growing Up in the 1970s       ************************************* You Know You’re Getting Old When…       *************************************** Coming Soon to a Bank Near YOU…       *************************************** How the Privileged White People Profit from Their Struggles from… you know…Being White       *************************************** To Prove a Point, Sometimes We Need to Just Let Liberals Speak…       ************************************** Meanwhile, Liberals Are Trying to Blame Putin for Blowing Up His Own Pipeline…Which Begs the Question:  Why Would He Do That?       ************************************** The Entire World Knows Putin Didn’t Do It       ************************************** O’Biden’s Speech Writers/Handlers Prompting Him on What to Say…       **************************************** And When Hackers Get Into Joe’s Earpiece…       ************************************ What Our Country is REALLY Worried About       ***************************************** How Normal People Respond to Gender Science       ******************************************* Here’s Something You Rarely Hear About       ************************************ What Happens Every Week at Financial$Matter.com       **************************************** How Liberals Decide Who is an Extremist       ************************************* Childhood Memories of the Smell of Burning Flesh…       ************************************** A Friendly Reminder To Those Who Think They Can Take Our Guns…       *********************************** We All Know That One Kid Who…       ******************************** When We Couldn’t Afford Seafood, Mom Always Came Through       ************************************** For All the ‘Tree Huggers’ Out There…       ************************************ Diversity in the USA Today       ************************************ How the Media Portrays the Hurricane Damage in Florida       ************************************ When Common Sense Finally Hits Home…       ************************************* The Long-Term Effects of Domesticating Cats       ********************************* ********************************* That’s all for this week’s edition of the Sunday Funnies. Unless, of course, you want to see more risqué and/or R-Rated memes. You can find them (HERE). As always, we hope you enjoy our memes/cartoons/rants etc. and that they bring a smile to your face. We definitely love to hear your comments so keep ‘em coming. And although the world seems pretty dark these days, we encourage you to see why you have a lot to hope for in 2022 and beyond (HERE). In the meantime, be sure to share these funnies with friends and family members. Caution: They may get offended. But remind them…It’s important to laugh together and laugh often. And be sure to tell them… We’re Not Just About Finance. FYI See You Next Sunday… Invest with confidence. Sincerely, James Vincent The Reverend of Finance Copyright © 2022 It's Not Just About Finance, LLC, All rights reserved. You are receiving this email because you opted in via our website. Read the full article

[bbboney]

WORW!!!!

#i was looking around for eafond drawing i couldnt even find and WOWS #ive changed a lot i think #i dont even use the pleading emoji anymore its been a LONG time since ive used it #i use to use it all the time... #anyways i think im sillier and more evil now #and 🥺 has been replaced with <3 #😊😔😭😳 <- those are the emojis i use the most now #its crazy 2 look back on old posts and see how i used to ask #like that time duck said 'draw ur ocs' and i responded with something like 'yes ok right away 🥺🥺' #if they said that now i would either go 'okay' or 'NO! just kidding here' #idk if past or present me is worse but i think its past <3 #rambles (tag edition) #diary