#lack of dopamine

[exclusivelyhomosexual]

Having late-diagnosed adhd is weird.

(CW internalized ableism)

Realizing that what I always thought was a “normal” source for motivation was really just shame, guilt, fear, self-judgment and a whole lot of “shoulding” (apart from the rare hyperfocus where the motivation was actually my own)

What I thought was “self-discipline” was just constant self-berating and guilt for being so “bad” at it when other people seemed to pick it up so easily

I always felt so ashamed whenever someone credited their success to their parents raising them to have a great work ethic. How come *I* didn’t turn out the same way, when my dad spent most of his waking moments working to provide for us? How did that not teach me a great work ethic?

Even if no one said it to my face, I internalized deeply the notion preached in every corner of society that people who aren’t self-disciplined are lazy and don’t actually care

I never thought I had adhd because I didn’t fit the stereotypical symptom profile. And I believed so deeply that I just had to “work harder” even though I was mentally deteriorating from how hard I actually was working. But that’s normal for everyone, right?

And now that I’ve deconstructed a lot of this shame and guilt (after years and years of therapy that I’ve been lucky to have), I see it as it is and have stopped using these toxic things to motivate me. And I’m realizing just how little “natural” motivation I actually have. Any motivation I do get is sporadic, for super random things, never consistent and not usually for “productive” tasks.

I’ve finally come to the place where I don’t feel even slightly opposed to trying out adhd medication either. But it has come at the *very* opportune time when I’m unemployed, searching for a job (with the aforementioned lack of motivation in a shit job market), and uninsured.

BuT aT LEaSt it’S a gReAt pRaCtiCE iN seLf cOmpAsSiOn!!! 🥴

#congrats if you read that whole thing #especially if you have adhd too lol #adhd #adhd brain #adult adhd #neurodivergent #neurodiverse stuff #executive dysfunction #i need dopamine #adhd meds #lack of motivation #lack of dopamine #self love #self compassion #blah blah blah #adhd post #adhd thoughts #undiagnosed adhd #late diagnosed adhd #representation matters #adhd tag #ableism cw #internalized ableism #internalized ableism cw #stop shoulding yourself #self discipline #laziness #laziness isn’t real #therapy #mental health

[petrichor-moss-and-lightning]

having adhd (or just generally being forgetful) is so fucking frustrating because you’ll lose something you literally just had in your hand and then proceed to go on a 45 minute quest to find said lost thing. meanwhile, you’re both the detective and the suspect, just trying to follow clues and patterns that make no sense. i’ll lose something, then grab my brain by the collar and go, “where tf is my charger. u just had it”. and my brain will just be like:

#actually adhd #adult adhd #attention deficit disorder (add) #attention deficit hyperactivity disorder #object permanence #forgetfulness #I hate it so much I have to hunt through clues as though it’s not my own brain and my own lack of object constancy #some nts will be like aw adhd is so cute and quirky meanwhile I’m fist fighting my hippocampus and defective dopamine receptors in an arena #adhd is in no way cute or quirky I break down crying on the regular bc it’s just so incredibly frustrating to not be able to remember #if u romanticize mental illness or neurodivergency I will steal all your bones

[me-sploh-rada-imas]

this is another part of novi val last night... you're telling me nace touched jan's hair twice? [x]

#joker out #nace jordan #jan peteh #jance #jure maček #bojan cvjetićanin #kris guštin #novi val #this time jure made sure he wasn't looking asfhsafghjl #still sad about lack of tokio wiggles but they did their dopamin shuffles carpe diem head nod astp something and this so can't be too mad #anyway being normal about them

[puffywiz]

I gotta draw a fucking picture good lord

#its dire out here #i saw someone say at9 was pushed to 2025 #goodreads says its already been published #tor when i catch you #the lack of news has me really bored and uninspired im sorry :( #dopamine receptors out in the trenches

[icys-junkyard]

my new art style i hope u like it

#obviously jk april fools etc #icys trashtalk #icys drawings and doodles #sorry bout the lack of actual art this past month #dopamine machine broke

[momwool]

My entry for Radshipweek2023!

#radshipweek2023 #my art #raditz #robot master #megaman crossover #I'M SORRY FOR MY LACK OF DBZ CONTENT ON MY PART #I have been obsessed with the robots #just following the dopamine where it takes me #gfldkjdlalkjda #<3

[rusquared]

bimonthly request to everyone struggling w energy/executive dysfunction/etc but wanting to create things: try origami. im so serious.

#'i hate my art style' -> HAH. there is no style in origami there r only fixed directions #'i struggle with long-term projects' -> a crane is super quick and easy to make and if u get pretty paper it looks like a decorative piece #'i dont want to think too much' -> after the initial cost of watching a tutorial the rest becomes muscle memory for certain designs #'it's too difficult' -> there are varying levels of complexity in designs online and u can easily find simple pieces that still look pretty #and lastly #people find little paper craft gifts adorable #and u get the dopamine hit of 'i made a thing' with a comparably low input cost #this is coming from the bitch who cant draw or write without nearly screaming from how much she hates her lack of skill #origami is accessible to my piece of shit meanie brain

[barrenwomb]

yesterday i had sex for three hours straight with the worst person alive and it made me realize i'm seriously mentally ill. but also you only live once i guess and the sex was amazing unfortunately.

#(teenage tiktoker's voice) it's the lack of dopamine

[tokkias]

i'm feeling the hyperfixation slipping im gonna need someone to pull me back in and remind me why i went feral for nalu in the first place

#mya's mumbles #idk if it's the #no dopamine or if it's the lack of engagement i am getting in the fandom #either way i hope it fixes itself soon bc i have 5 more fics to write for nalu week

[exclusivelyhomosexual]

*me, giving my guest a tour and showing them where the bathroom is*

“…and this is my home office: where I rapid-fire respond to all the 30 texts I’ve been ignoring for 2 weeks, whilst waiting for my neurodivergent intestines to do their thing.”

#neurodivergent intestines #it’s a thing #you thought only your brain was neurodivergent? #then may I ask why your bowel habits have never been normal? #texting is overwhelming #executive dysfunction #neurodivergent #neurodiverse stuff #dopamine deficiency #adhd #lack of motivation #adult autism #adhd and autism #self diagnosed autism #autism #autistic adult #adhd brain #adult adhd

[volivolition]

drawing like. one line on this piece. immediately ctrl+z, think "i hate art" and scroll tumblr some more until i think "i have to finish this piece." repeat.

#chemi chats #listen. i just want to draw the skills i dont want to draw the humans right now. raughh... #chemi voice please for the love of GOD stop doing this the sheer lack of dopamine is going to kill you. voli voice no it isn't. it won't. #it sucks when your comfort character is volition. how am i supposed to dramatically renounce my art career when the voice of willpower and #perseverance tells me to just stay the course and i can do it?? what am i supposed to do? say no? to HIM?? WHEN HE BELIEVES IN ME??? #lmao. save me volition save me.

[gai-is-love-kakagai-is-life]

Damn you ADHD! Im gonna write something for Kakagai even if it kills me!

#bruh im running out of dopamine #the gai train is slowing #i dont want it to #i just have no one to talk to #the lack of gai stimulus is killing me #IMMA WRITE SOMETHING MARK MY WORDS #maito gai #kakagai #might guy #kakashi hatake #adhd fucking sucks

[hpdgirlfriend]

does anyone else get extremely demotivated + other stuff when they don't get enough attention. like i can't do basic tasks because of it

#i just fucking sit there. for hours #idk if it's an adhd thing (bcuz chronic lack of dopamine) or hpd thing .. #txt #crashing feels like desperation for attention for me but this feels like extreme emptiness + tiredness etc #it might just be a different kind of crashing #honestlyhistrionic #honestly histrionic #actually hpd #actually histrionic #hpd things #hpd #histrionic personality disorder #histrionic #histrionic pd #histrionic things #actually adhd

[slimeciclecock]

Girl where is my joy where is my whimsy why am I tired everyday why don't my interests satiate me 😭 I'm not even depressed why can't I get my enjoyment :////

#everyday i go to work and come back and apparate for 7 hours or take naps that tire me out #im not getting my dopamine fix i am so understimulated everyday i cant get myself to do anything #why do i have a one track mind ehy cant i have like hundreds of interests that i can pick from the shelf when i need a break #this is so annoying and boring it makes me wanna live in a hole or be the most ruthless merciless heinous person known to man #why are all my interests so obscure or so dry/lacking of good content that i have to be the one who makes content #but as it turns out im forever in a creative slump where i cant create without a 6 month break in betwen so i just kinda sit there w my #with my metal illness and brainworms and refusal to get up and do something useful #ive watched like 40 mins of the secret life of walter mitty but i think im going thru that bullshit ? #brain in a constant state of tired can i just take it out put it in a jar and refill w juice #.... maybe i am depressed i just keep forgetting #oh well 🤷

[e-kamski-cyberlifeceo]

I'm taking the next few weeks off things are about to get worse

#stay tuned for my brain to slowly rot as the lack of dopamine finally causes me to snap #I haven't told anyone what I'm doing yet I hope they are okay with me not being available for awile

[liyazaki]

pp krit 🍏🌞💐🚌 | 07.25.22

#pp krit #pp kritt #colors culture #it's like the king knew i'm desperate for dopamine/serotonin #also hire me to do your editing love because this color grading (lack thereof) was giving beige blah c0rp$e #pp krit*