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#like im absolutely done with sharing my art with anyone i know irl bc they do not give a single shit
qweenofurheart · 20 days
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something about writing fiction makes me feel so humiliated and stupid like ohhh hahar look at me i create a fake world and fake characters that engage in complex conflicts and love each other but SYKE its actually all me. its all just me. someone with no actual life whatsoever
also trying to explain worldbuilding to people without looking deranged “oh yeah this is the Snoopum where the Smorgasums go every Sormomorm” and then you get that blank stare + awkward grimace smile from people 😀
and it’s even worse if it’s closer to reality “this is Bob Nanders and he lives in a share house in Attard Malta and he feels this way about inflation” like im going to throw up who the fuck is Bob Nanders. go die
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honeyrisuke · 2 years
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ok no turns out what im mad about and posted about earlier wasnt a big deep "modern media bad bluh" thing, im just. not feeling so hot rn
very long boring ramble below
I've struggled with my art ever since I started to put it online
like, I'd always refresh and check if someone saw it and then get all exciting when someone did see it and like it and so on but not even once have I had some art I did actually,,, do anything for me. it was never _worth it_ if that makes sense.
I'd sit there for hours upon hours and then post it in hopes someone else enjoys it and seemingly nobody ever does. I can spend days on a drawing and it barely even reaches my friends, and in old media at least I still had one or the other random
even right now on Furaffinity, which also isnt algorythmically sorted, I occationally get people who just like all of my stuff in a quite sincere way, or comment on my art in a genuine way- and that's why I've recently enjoyed drawing furry fetish art a lot more than anything else, even when I didn't wanna draw furries that day.
but on shit like instagram or twitter or even on here I've. I rarely even get one interaction?? on my art?? I've never gotten a comment. I've never had someone share my art on twitter or instagram because they liked it
and when I did get faves or comments it was always either an IRL friend of mine who'd like a selfie of me taking a shit bc they don't care, as long as I posted it, or someone I don't know who just wants to promote their own account
I've blocked people in the past who left a nice comment on instagram, and when i replied to thank them they immediately went for "would you mind checking out my page"
bc yea i do mind shut tf up
its. fundamentally uncomfortable to be in those positions. I don't wanna go around using other people as stepping stones to get anywhere. I don't wanna go around and put up this big professional influencer facade just so I can draw my lame fucking characters and have maybe 10 people like it
and no, I'm not talking huge numbers and wanting fame or whatever, just. something. anything.
I've grown to really really hate art communities, and that means whenever I sit down and want to draw I have to first fight a big "but what for?"
and most of the time recently? I lose that fight. I can't think of a "what for", and then I sit there for several hours slowly thinking myself into a rage instead of doing anything productive, because actually I'm also very upset about not drawing, but I can't think of a good reason to do it
and to anyone who says "just do it for yourself"- you know you're lying. I've never met an artist who said that shit to my face and didn't have at least one person they could share their art with
I'd just be out here sending it to random ass people knowing damn well I'm annoying.
art is worthless if it can't be shared with anyone. I really picked the worst fucking hobby as a child. I hate everything I do and I hate doing it
I was hoping to rekindle my muse with artfight but as for right now, it looks like I'm not even gonna get a single attack, and each time I sit down to draw I'm building my hope up again that "this time they will respond and draw something back to" just to sit here on the 31st with maybe one really crappy doodle made by someone who just wanted to get free art from me. and if I'm as stupid as I've been all these years, I'll even have given them that free piece of art.
I'm just. I don't know where to go from here and. not to be even more of a downer at the end of this, in case anyone actually did read it, but
I've. not felt so hot about being around anymore recently, and fundamentally feeling like I should stop doing at alltogether is a big part of that. I've always done art one way or another, and so far nobody has ever given a shit about it. I have genuinly no idea why I've done it for so long. but i feel like if i stop then I am doing absolutely nothing anymore. i wouldnt be expressing myself anymore, i wouldnt put anything out there anymore. id just be here locked inside of my head unable to communicate the things im passionate about because i KNOW im annoying, i KNOW im unbearable and overly aggressive and genuinly unlikeable, and i know nobody gives a shit about the stuff i like or enjoy. i already stopped being excited about things bc of that years ago and am now only defaulting to be pissed and to complain and to make fun of things
and i feel that if i fully stop drawing and making art its. kinda over. idk i dont wanna write it out but that'd be it.
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bangtansfavwriter · 4 years
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💘bangtan as boyfriends: jungkook💘
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-oh my god this soft boy
-still can't quite believe you guys are dating and sometimes still blushes very heavily when you kiss him
- it took ages for him to ask you out and he probably wouldn't have done it without a pep talk from seokjin who hyped him up before you and jungkook went on a date together
- he was so timid and tripped over his words a lot, so when you asked "are you saying we should start dating?" he went "oh my god yES PLS"
-he know tells everyone that you asked him out first bc "the golden maknae of bts, bangtan sonyeondan, behind the scene, world's best band tbh has to be asked out"
seokjin: makes sense, bc said golden maknae looked like he was gonna pass tf out before you two met
jk: .. hyung why you.... I asked y/n out!
seokjin: lies
you: he did... kinda
seokjin: LIES
jk: I find your lack of faith disturbing, hyung..
seokjin: nerd 😚
jk: 😔✊🏼
- a nerd indeed, but cuteee
- very loyal, it already took him long enough to call you his, so he sure af won't give you up
- also very selfless, he loves helping you out with whatever you need help with... even when you don't ask for it
- like when you had a project due and you were stressing out about it bc you had no time for anything else and stuff... he was really worried you'd skip meals to do your work, so he made sure that you'd eat by either coming to your place or calling/texting you, whenever he couldn't come over personally
-he was afraid he'd bother you while you do your work so he was always very cautious but you reassured him it's fine
-but you felt bad bc you couldn't talk much while doing your work... he looked at you and smiled: "it's ok, I'll write some lyrics maybe.. and you do you. we'll give each other strength with our presence, alright?" he started laughing when you got up and cozied up to him. you spent the next 10 mins cuddling, as this was the only reasonable thing to do after he was being so sweet. "so much for no distractions, hm?"
- you still got your work done btw, so no worries
- movie nights are a huge thing for you two, your range is broad af but mostly consists of marvel, disney and studio ghibli. he has a thing for 80s movies tho, felt ferris bueller on a personal level
- cried when he watched the princess diaries for the first time and will end u if anyone hears about it
-rather savage irl but he cries during some movies, especially when he's tired, he gets emotional and even whiny
- for example: he was very sleepy when you first watched the mandalorian together and you swear he started weeping when he first saw baby yoda and he's been obsessed ever since btw
- very thoughtful and caring
- remembers the smallest things about you, will bring you your fav ben&jerry's when you feel down and enjoys the fact that you look at him like the saint he is
- also memorizes your habits and reads your body language so well that it still surprises you even after all the time you've been dating
-you poke his cheeks on any given occasion and kiss his nose, he's not quite sure why but he enjoys it too
- his hugs are just warm ... they make you feel like everything will be ok
- many pancake mornings together
- will never ever forget any birthday or anniversary, he once did tho and he still beats himself up about it but he was busy as hell during that time so you were ok with it in hindsight (which was greatly appreciated bc he truly felt awful)
- very down-to-earth, it doesn't have to be all fancy with him, he's doing just fine with netflix and ramen
- your personal laundry fairy
- looots of laughter and giggles with this one, always cracking jokes
- you guys have like 48394 insides jokes
you: hey.. hey
jk: ?
you: second goose right left
jk: LMAOOOOO WOFT
you: LMAOOO
jk and you: -dying-
rm: this sounds like some terror code
hobi: or a stroke
- sends u memes at 3am, his go-to are kermit memes as reaction memes, he sometimes forgets to use actual words tbh
you: kook, i can't come over today, working late :( but tomorrow is fine tho, you free ?
jk: -kermit crying under the shower meme-
you: jungkook, words pls
jk: oh sorry babe, yeah im free 🤗
- either uses the cutest nicknames or the weirdest which are pretty cute when he explains it (like left shark "bc you stand out")
- displays of 'strong manly man' when he picks you up, and spins you around only to kiss you --- displays of 'babie boy's when pouts until you give him attention or your last pockys ("we can share, you know 👀" - "oh worm? 👀")
- a true romantic deep down, he once surprised you when he decorated your entire house with candles and flowers bc he knew you had a tough time and you legit just started crying. he was overwhelmed for a sec but knew this was just bottled up emotions and relief coming through so he just smiled and hugged you until you calmed down."it's alright, love... let me take care of you." you nodded and smiled at him, while wiping your tears away. "you're the sweetest, you know that?" - "well, obviously. but fire safety was never my forte, so let's be careful, ok?" he said and you both started laughing.
-sings to you very very often, get used to it, even when you're not right next to him you can still hear him humming from afar and it makes always makes u smile
-you two are fiercely competitive, there is no "it's just a game"... you guys play mario, sonic, rayman etc and there's always a whole lot of screaming
-there was a time namjoon jin got so fed up with this that he took the playstation away (+ mario kart) and jungkook and you had to find other gaming options
-some examples of truth or dare sessions between you (in the safety of your own home):
you: i dare you to dance to begin
jk, in his pyjamas: wha- ... no!
you: truth it is, then. what was the dumpling incident about?
jk: nevermind, I'll do the dance.
you: squeeze the ketchup bottle empty with your thighs.
jk: ?????? jesus, you take your kinks to a whole knew level. choose something else, the stains will be nasty as hell.
you: wear booty shorts👀
jk: you wants thighs and booty, huh? 👀
you: you bet 👀👀
(a blessed day for u tbh)
jk: babe, i dare you to dance to fire.
you: ?????? well, I can try, but you should get me an inhaler, my lung capacity may not suffice for this
(jungkook laughed so hard when did it that he was the one that needed an inhaler)
-takes lots and loots of pics of you when you're together and of the location you went together , posts the view on twitter sometimes and jokes about you two being official (to fans) without really being official
- you two go on walks together, have coffee shop dates, go to concerts (and go fckn feral when u go see iu), visit art galleries where you mostly imitate everything and touch things you shouldn't touch, go to karaoke places ... and you also do art together! that was actually his idea were he bought a shitload of acrylic paint and huge linen sheets and you had your first painting date, which has become a tradition ever since.
- something that jungkook absolutely loves and appreciates is that you guys never run out of topics to talk about
-the intellectual stimulation he gets from you is pretty much unmatched and that's also something that made him realise he's into you before you started dating
- 2 sides of the same coin: smart, charming and kind // absolute crackhead (remember the vid with his goggles? vids like that are now your exclusive content from yours truly)
- once chased down chickens when you visited a village together and ran away screaming when a huge ass rooster chased after him ( u filmed it ofc)
- lives for dramatics, gains new life power on Halloween when you two do shenanigans on bighit's annual party
- he loves the fact that you're still a child at heart and that you're not too stuck up to scare hobi and jin with michael myers masks on (but you did feel pretty bad about it when hobi almost fainted)
- you're super savage when you want to be and he loves it when you are... ngl... you being assertive and all kinda turns him on lmaoo
-your green card to get him to laugh whenever was saying "you sexy beast" and he'd forget whatever issue you were having before, as long as it wasn't something too important obviously
-loves you show you off, especially when you guys are all dolled up and ready for a night out "look at us being all sexy and shit, like, how dare we look this hot, jimin-hyung hates it when someone looks hotter than him" - "hmmm kook, imagine if I'd have jimin as my date today, the place would burn up" - "...." - "kook, i was joking..." - "right shark" - "I WAS JOKING BABY" - "........say it. you know the deal." - "i would rather die" - "go hang with hyung then, i'm gonna stay home" - "you...." -
👀👂 - "YOU SEXY BEAST" - jungkook laughed until he couldn't breathe when yoongi, who just passed by you two, and you stared at each other, completely mortified. you: how to unsay things... / yoongs: how to unhear things/ jk: -on the floor and in dire need of an inhaler"
- you couldn't face yoongi the whole night, whereas jungkook occasionally stared down jimin who had no clue what the heck was going on and munched on some appetizers
- jealousy is not a big thing for him but he still doesn't quite like it when someone is too touchy with you
- he trusts you, absolutely no doubt about that or he wouldn't have even entered a relationship with you, as he has high standards about who to let into his life, especially with potential lovers
-that's why everyone knew you guys were serious about each other and it was hardly surprising that you got to meet his family shortly after you guys started dating (his mother loved you btw)
-has like 200 pics of the day you met gureum
- an absolute sucker for you, you could say you want the n seoul tower to flicker in purple and pink lights and he would get it done somehow
- very sensitive to touches so ......👀
- loves your room bc he says it always smells like your lotions and laundry
- you sometimes surprise by setting the mood with some smooth music and nice fragrances and the world comes to a halt for him, it's just him and you
-shower him in affection and he's putty in your hands, legit, when he first performed euphoria and did the high note at the end you spammed tf outta your messenger and hyped him up and he actually got so hype he jumped around backstage after the concert and sprinted to you when he saw you, twirled you around and, for the first time, kissed you while the guys were there
-he still gets teased about it tho, but he doesn't really care bc your support means the world to him and he values it too much to care about the guys
-you guys went home that night and he serenaded you while you were cuddling. you guys started talking about songs, especially your favourites. you got sleepy when he started talking about 'home' and softly sang it to you, until he realised you dozed off. he smiled to himself and caressed you hair, as you had layed your head onto his chest. admiring your sleeping figure, closely entangled with his broad frame, he said to himself: "this is home..."
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pepprs · 5 years
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[DONT RB] ok so there’s no way for me to talk abt this that isn’t gonna make me look like an absolute dumbass but im in the middle of a creative existential crisis and i rly need help figuring it out :•( this is gonna get SUPER LONG so im putting it under a readmore. thank u to anyone who reads this!!! and double thank u to anyone who can give some input / advice, i rly rly appreciate it. im sorry abt the length!
aight so for some background.... ive been drawing n writing poetry for abt 5 yrs now and both of those things r rly important to me. in school im an english major w a creative writing minor (for the poetry) and i work as a graphic designer (for the art) so ive been growing a lot as an artist and writer esp in the past 2 yrs and im kinda workin towards one or the other (or ideally both somehow!) as a career. one of the biggest dreams ive had since i started seriously pursuing both of these hobbies 5 yrs ago is to publish a book of poetry that i design / illustrate myself, and also to have a portfolio online where ppl can read all of my poetry and see all of my artwork (both professional / work stuff but also archives of all of my sketchbooks since those r rly important to me!!!) and maybe even make some sort of online shop where ppl can buy my art (stickers, keychains, etc!) and my poetry books!
that sounds pretty simple right? WRONG!!!!!! why? bc im a fucking idiot! and there are several dumb things i do that make this dream completely impossible for me to achieve! love that for me!
so for starters... ive been posting (almost) all of my art and ALL of my poetry online for all 5 yrs ive been creating it. that’s bad because:
ive hardly ever used my real name (which i would want to use for the book / shop / portfolio), it’s been under my usernames / aliases that go along w them (p*pe, pep, pea, etc and related usernames that shall not be mentioned) and i started going by my real first name only abt a yr ago, but still maintain those usernames for the most part in conjunction w my real name
my work has been primarily been posted to d*viantart and tumblr which aren’t exactly the most uh... professional places to do that. not that there rly are many i guess lmao but still
my online persona on these platforms is rly like. lax and loose which is Cool And Quirky when brought into a professional setting if it’s done right i guess.... but im just immature and unprofessional. i swear all the time, i shitpost constantly, im incessantly tmi? and that’s not even it like it’s just a whole mess!
SO there’s that whole set of problems and like im just concerned because... i stopped posting art online last yr for the most part and a lot of the old stuff that’s on dA (since that was rly where i did it most) is bad and not worth sharing like that anyways, so im not as worried abt that. but my poetry.... i still actively post that online in all my messiness and candidness here and like. it’s rly not that hard to find me? like if u copy a poem of mine and put it in google it’ll pull up my dA right away! and that’s like.... GOD i just am embarrassed for anyone irl to see that or for that to be connected with my irl / professional self in the future, but i don’t want to stop posting my work there (or here!!!!!) bc the community is so supportive and ive made some rly good connections / built a lot of traction over the 5 yrs ive been doing it. (PLUS for the online portfolio i wanna do specifically... i kinda want to post all of my art and poetry there, like everything ive ever done (specifically poetry, ive written almost 500 poems over the 5 yrs ive been doing it!), but i feel like that’s not rly the most professional thing to do and idk how to even gauge whether it is or not :-/)
but that’s not all!!!! because there’s another part to this and that is: the very nature of the content i produce is Not Good! for my art it’s not as much of a problem bc since I work as an artist rn a lot of what i make is professional, but for my personal art... a lot of that is either self portraits or my characters and a lot of my characters are like. animals. like specifically pepe (who is basically Me As A Cat).... i draw her constantly and so much of my best work is of her but it’s just like? embarrassing i guess for my ocs to take up so much of my portfolio and sketchbooks and stuff and share that. like i know everyone has characters and it’s not bad to do that and share that but i feel like ppl will judge me :-( so it’s made me rly hesitant to post stuff to my art ig for example bc i just don’t fucking know how to act, like it’s bad enough that i can’t type the way i want to and i have to type in proper caps n whatever instead bc irls i don’t know / trust as well follow me (including some ppl from work? Yikes?)....... but i feel like i can’t share my sketchbook stuff for example bc it’s all cats and my characters and visual shitposts and im uncomfy to share that bc like... im almost 20 and i don’t want ppl to think im immature or whatever? i kno i should feel like it’s my account and i can post wot i want but like. i fucking can’t bro i just can’t!!
and THEN.... my poetry. that’s the biggie bc like for my art? even tho im uncomfortable i don’t mind sharing that w ppl i know irl but for my POETRY.... it’s very easy to find like where i share that i guess? (the google thing i mentioned earlier but also its linked to my art on here and dA too... f) but i literally never actively share my writing w irl ppl unless im performing @ an open mic or workshopping in class bc im fucking terrified of the possibility of irl ppl finding my poetry. it’s almost ironic how public ive been w it online but how private i am abt it irl... it’s like im living a double life and it’s fucking terrible but it’s the only way i feel safe. bc like art is what i do for other ppl and also to destress and vent when i need a quick fix on my own time. but poetry.... that’s personal, it’s where i feel most like myself, it’s how i talk abt my life and ppl in it and make meaning of things and talk abt things authentically and Get Deep. and my literal worst nightmare is for ppl (who have the explicit ability to by virtue of Knowing Me) to read into it and Understand what im talking abt and have that power over me and see me differently for feeling the way i do or doing what i do. ive actually already been burned by this before after my mom read some work of mine that had been published irl (i don’t want to get too into it but basically i retroactively outed myself thru her reading that poem for what it was and it was Very Very Bad) and as paranoid abt it as i was before, it’s even worse now that it’s actually happened to me and could happen again at any time, esp if i decide to take my work further.
that manifests in a few ways too, like my writing is so cryptic and vague and very heavy on metaphors / symbolism and shit partially out of that deep fear and need to shield myself and my work. sometimes in spaces where i do feel comfy sharing, ppl have a hard time understanding my poetry unless i give context. online and on stage and in workshop ppl don’t rly know me outside of a context where the only thing we have in common is self expression thru poetry, so i don’t rly mind sharing more when it’s appropriate. but if i were to share my work as a book or w/e, ppl im close to (who maybe don’t always think like a poet / artist does bc they aren’t that) would want to buy it and read it and might ask abt what it means and i don’t even know what i would do in that situation. and if ppl were to read my work and see themselves / others in it, whether it is abt them or not, im scared it could genuinely damage relationships like it did with my mom.
SO UH.... idk where im going w this rly, i kno it’s long and rambly and melodramatic and im probably overthinking it and making a mountain out of a molehill and nobody even knows / cares abt me AND my work @ the same time enough to read That Deep into it. but it just fucking sucks that im so uncomfortable and insecure that i can’t comfortably fulfill literally the one single long term goal / life dream that i have. andthe thing that sucks is i can’t talk to Anybody abt this except like... my sister and brother bc they’re the only ppl i genuinely tell everything to, but they don’t have the knowledge and expertise abt art / poetry that like... my poetry prof does, for example. and my poetry prof is one of the best ppl ive ever met and the Only person ive ever met irl who respects and understands my poetry in the exact way i need someone to. she and i have been talking and she rly wants to help me publish my poetry bc she sees merit in my work and knows how bad i want to / how successful it’s been already, but i don’t know how to talk abt this to her bc im embarrassed to tell her abt posting online and being ashamed abt my muses and all that and it just!!! sucks so much bc i kinda want to publish my work @ least once before i graduate and do it semi regularly for the rest of my life? but there’s so much in my way and it’s just! FGGFHDGJGGGG
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vixenfur · 6 years
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Tag at least 5 people you love and give a few words on why!
OH MY GOODNESS!!!
Since there was so much BS in the fandom today, time to share some love! :)
- @zeta-jane is an absolute godsend of a friend. They are sassy, funny, talkative, energetic and so full of amazing ideas!!! Zeta is always there for me when I need someone to lean on. They’re such a kind friend and they will not hesitate, baitch to fight people who hurt me- probably because they know I’d do the same for them! They’re such good company both online and IRL, and I am blessed to have met them! I am even more blessed to be writing City of Dust and Shadows with them, which has become the longest fic either of us has ever written! We may or may not surpass it with our future collabs, however ;) They are just the coolest person ever and they deserve all the love in the world. I adore them so much!!! TUT 
- @mikayu-chan is such a got damn SWEETHEART. They are trying to see the positive side of things, especially after so much fandom drama in the past, and I’m so so proud of them for trying their hardest to live their best life. They have it way too hard and I want to give them a big ole hug and many days of fun!!! They always make me laugh and we have a great time on calls! I’m glad that we see eye-to-eye on so many things and that we continue to teach each other new things all the time!! They are really an irreplaceable friend and such a joy to talk with, to write with, and to laugh with. I love you Chan
- @crazyloststar deserves the entire world and more!!!! oMg I cannot express how much I love Alex!!!!! Alex is just a big bundle of happiness and fun and she makes me so so so so so so so happy. I love calling with her and talking, I love writing with her and everything else!! We always have so much fun, I swear I can’t talk to her without laughing my ass off at least once XD we’re always DJDJDHDHDHDJD’ing at each other because we just can’t find the right words to express how hard we’re agreeing with each other/laughing omfg. I adore her and I cant WAIT to cosplay KimiYoi and RyuuTenn with her hopefully at next year’s Yaoi Con WOOT WOOT :D!!!!
- @yuudefensesquad is sUCH A GOOD BEAN who deals with SO MUCH and she just needs a big ole hug and lots of Yuuchan i stg. Caydence is such a funny funky lil nugget and I protecc her with my life okay. Her art? Flawless. Her shitposts? FUCKIN HILARIOUS. Her meta? Super engaging and intriguing! Her bravery? ABOVE US ALL LOL. She is just awesome and I’m glad I forcefully adopted her into my lil family of mikayuu nerds bc it just wouldn’t be the same without her. Caydence ily never stop being you. A lot of shit challenges her irl and everywhere else, but she still keeps her head up and man I really respect her.
- @mikaisatop is MY FRICKIN RIGHT HAND MAN. My SOULMATE. SARAHHH I ADORE YOU. You might be busy rn but I love you so much girl ;__; even though she’s busy I always bother her bc I want her to know I wouldn’t ever forget about her!! I’m so happy we got to collab so much and will continue doing so!! Winter’s Waltz is so much fun to write and I’m so happy she is writing it with me anyways despite such a busy schedule. If it weren’t for Sarah we wouldn’t have so much good MikaYuu content and I applaud her for it!!
- @6lilystrings9 IS JUST THE BOMB DOT FUCKIN COM. Lily and I didn’t super duper connect until more recently but omg talking with her is just a freakin BLAST. We always get so hype with each other, even over each other’s fandoms that we aren’t even in!!! Something about the energy in her pulls out the energy in me and we just get GOING lmao. She is so very talented and amazing and a fascinating person all around! I’m so glad we got to hang a bit at KatsuCon in 2017 but I hope we can do that again in the future! I miss her all the time!
- @weirdfairytales is the MAN. THE MYTH. THE LEGEND. Anna is just the biggest definition of a meme I can think of and I LOVE her for it. I’m so glad that we met way back when MikaYuuHell Skype existed and that she thought of the masterpiece that is Cherry Boy one wild night. I’m so glad we continued to be great friends and talk about so many things. I love when our messages get super long cause we just have so many things to say XD Cosplaying Victuuri with her at Katsu was so lit, and I can’t express how much I love her Victuuri fic too!!!
- @hannaadi88 is such. a. sweetheart. I can’t say it enough. Hanna does so much and gets so little I stfg yall need to APPRECIATE HER MORE. Her writing is STUNNING and the projects she makes for this fandom are just outstanding!!! From gift exchanges (I SAID ONS REMIX BEFORE IM SORRY i was wrong XD) to 365 Days of Mika and Yuu, she has put in so much for us constantly! She has also granted us with the lovely fic Scented, and not to mention one of my favorite fics of ALL TIME, Eye of Horus- the Ancient Egypt take on Unwritten!!! And she named it that without knowing my first tattoo is literally the eye of horus! XD I was shook lmfao and I still am. Meeting Hanna was amazing and the day I spent with her and @ihavetobenkyou (who is also a-freaking-MAZING and a big bundle of goodness!!!!!!) is one I’ll never forget. She’s so chill and just gives off this ‘wise’ aura idk why but I just look up to Hanna so much. No matter what she writes I will always support her and you all should too!!!
- @just-another-dream-about-yuu is ONE OF MY FAVORITE HUMANS TO EVER HUMAN. Julia omfg I cannot express how much I love you. TwT Julia is not only one of the most talented artists I have ever seen, but she is so sweet and fun and so full of energy and excitement!! She’s super busy with adulting so she’s not around in the fandom a whole lot but I always make sure to include her bc I won’t let her leave XD JULIA YOU CANNOT ESCAPE…. lmfao I will always drag you back… I won’t ever forget the day I got a twitter notification that someone drew me Unwritten fanart and the croaking sound I made was insane LMAO my friend who was with me was like WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED XD I was so excited!!! I still adore every piece of fanart she’s given me and I always will. Thank you, Julia, for bringing my imagination to life so many times, for showing me what you saw when you read my writing. It means more than I can say.
- @coleglend is the most underappreciated person in this fandom I swear. Or, who was in this fandom- Cole is off doing other things besides OnS, but regardless, she is so very amazing and beyond talented. I can’t even express how beautiful her art is and the emotions each piece sparks in me. Even her new Marvel artworks are just breathtaking and I truly admire them!!! I don’t know anyone who can make such detailed, visually engaging art- everything she creates belongs in a museum I swear. I want to print them and frame them for my walls!!! I look at her art all the time!!! Now that I’ve established how gorgeous her art is, talk about Cole as a person! She’s so sweet and kind and I love seeing her little posts on Instagram and such, even though I can’t understand most of them, I like seeing that she’s with friends and having a good time.
- @linnpuzzle is one of the coolest most amazing people in this fandom!!! Her art is STUNNING and as she knows, I will drop everything to commission her and buy her merch because I just am addicted to her gorgeous art!!! I am so honored to have some of her art as part of my collection of OnS things and I am forever going to treasure the commissions I’ve purchased from her!! Besides being a great artist, I love talking with Linn, too! I’m so glad we have things in common outside of MikaYuu, like Voltron and Kyo Kara Maoh :D Linn is truly too good for this world and she deserves everything okokok.
- @zilleniose-chu is truly an ICON of this fandom. We don’t talk alot outside of business stuff lolol but they are just freakin amazing!!! I adore their art so much- I always have, ever since I first saw their page!!- and I LOVE their AU’s and headcanons!! They are full of such great ideas and humor and they can share those ideas through really stunning and captivating artwork
- @absolute-exclusivity IS AN AMAZIN. ABSOLUTELY AMAZING BEAN OH MY GOODNESS i cANT TELL YOU ENOUGH HOW MUCH I LOVE LYSIA. AAAAAAAAHHHH THIS GIRL IS GONNA SPEND MY BIRTHDAY WITH ME OUT IN LONDON LESSGO GIRL!!! I’m so excited you have NO IDEA. Lysia is so so so energetic and cute and overall such an amazing friend!! She’s so caring and always willing to listen even when things are busy for her!! She’s full of hilarious, tragic, and heart-pounding ideas and AU’s. We always get lit together talking about fics and headcanons and I wouldn’t trade those moments for the world. I can’t wait to meet her and I can’t wait to collab with her and Zeta soon, too!!
- @rindartist is absolutely one of my favorite artists of ALL TIME no doubt about it. Rin is so amazing, always making so many beautiful artworks of MikaYuu, and now of other lovely series aswelll! I may not be into GBF but her art of it is just lovely and I suggest everyone to commission Rin if they have the means!!
- @p0isonpez is someone I’ve only seen from afar but I absolutely love her art and posts!! I am so happy to see someone new in the fandom sharing such lovely things and interacting with the rest of us!! you seem so friendly and kind and I hope we can talk more sometime! :D
- @temesasu is such a sweetheart!! We’re just starting to talk a little more, but I am soso happy!! They are such an amazing cosplayer and their ONS cosplayers bring such a big smile to my face. They are beautiful and able to make themselves look like so many different characters!!! They are so talented with makeup, I am in awe!! :D And they are so kind and fun to talk to, and I hope we talk more! Thank you for sharing your cosplays with us, you are amazing! Don’t stop!
- @seraph-star is such a good precious person who makes endless good content!! Omg, their edits are just so awesome!! they always have me bouncing my head along, or completely enraptured and breathless, or laughing!! They are so good at evoking different emotions through video editing and as a very casual video editor myself, I am so impressed with their work!! I also love their memes and art and everything else that they share!!!
- @angeru-artist is a precious PRECIOUS ANGEL who deserves the entire world!!!! Omg, Angeru makes such amazing art, with such expressive characters and cute little attributes!!! I love it when I see their art and I’m so glad that we share a few fandoms together rather than just one. Angeru is really bighearted and she goes through way too much hard times, and I wish I could just take her away to somewhere better!!! One day my friend we will forget about the world and just have fun!!
- @maqui-chan iS ONE OF THE BEST ARTISTS I’VE EVER KNOWN OMFG. her art is iconic and unforgettable!!!! Maqui’s art has always been one of my favorites of all time and I can’t even count the amount of times I’ve commissioned her LOL!! I JUST LOVE HER ART SO MUCH OKAY!?? ITS SO GOOD GO LOOK AT ALL OF HER GLORIOUS CREATIONS! she is so talented and she can create anything, from angst to smut to humor, leave it to Maqui to create amazing things!! And omg Maqui ignited the fire in all of our ShuuNaru hearts amiright!??? GOD her art inspired me so much to the point to where I wrote a ShuuNaru fic and it was so much fun!!! Maqui, thank you for drawing so many awesome things and creating so much for the fandom!! Even if you’ve mostly fallen out of it, your creations are always going to be treasured by me and many other people- you’ve impacted people way more than you know! Thank you for always making me laugh on twitter aswell XD you’re amazing and ily!!! 
OK OK I;M OUT OF STEAM I’VE BEEN TYPING THIS FOREVER OK i could go ON AND ON about even MORE people in this fandom but that would take me literal ages LMAO
TO EVERYONE ELSE, WHO I DIDN’T MENTION BC MY BRAIN IS JUMBLED AND I AM EXHAUSTED: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. DONT STOP CREATING. THE FANDOM IS A FLAMING GARBAGE HEAP SOMETIMES LIKE IT WAS TODAY. But DON’T LET THAT STOP YOU from having a good time, doing what you love, and creating things that you are proud to share!!! And if your heart leads you elsewhere, to a different brand new fandom, I hope you always remember the people you inspired with your work!! I hope you forget the bad memories and always treasure the good ones. I hope that we can be friends and/or that I can continue supporting you no matter where we all end up in the years to come. And if you decide to support me too, I give you my biggest, most heartfelt thanks.
No matter how ridiculous this fandom can get and how much stupid discourse can dampen the mood and disappoint me, I will never let it stop me from loving MikaYuu and OnS and what I do. I will never let it stop me from writing all that my crazy little heart wants. I will continue to write until my passion dies, and when that day comes I will probably cry as I say goodbye and resort to watching from the sidelines as everyone else carries on. I will never forget the fun I had here. These past 3 years have been so impactful already, and I know the future ones will continue to be- with the old friends, with the new friends, and with friends to be made!!
Let’s spread love more often rather than hate. I encourage anyone who feels inclined to make posts (maybe not as long as mine if you dont want XDD) talking about your favorite creators and friends in the fandom, too! Or, if that seems too corny to you, just continue to draw, write, edit, and cosplay! Continue to make people laugh and smile and cry and swoon! Continue to support creators by leaving comments and kudos, by liking and reblogging, by following and commissioning, and sharing and crediting their work wherever you can! Continue to make a difference!
I love you all so much!
35 notes · View notes
heyitslapis · 6 years
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Ok let's see... its been about 3 weeks since i posted last, give or take a few days. And I'll just say its been an interesting and exhausting few weeks.
Still trying to completely get over my dumbf*ck feelings for Alex. I'm not really doing a super great job at that, and still get random depressive moments that last a varying amount of time, but usually i just push my pity party to the side after about 2 minutes.
On the 3rd of June, Alex went up to see part of her family and join them on a cruise to Columbia. She said wont be back until maybe the 3rd or 4th of July at the earliest. I kinda miss her, but I feel like spending a month physically apart from her will do me some good. Her and i still snap back and fourth to save our streak and to day good morning. Whenever she cant find wifi, she turns on her dad's personal hotspot so she can send me at least one snap to keep our streak rolling (we are the longest streak we have with anyone on our snapchats, and it stands currently at 261 days.) The day after she left the streak sorta died for the day, but she was able to save it cause she was in a different time zone.
Since she's been gone, we've hired several new people at work, many if which being new hosts (thank God tbh, cause this means after theyre all done training and get a couple weeks to get used to everything i can train as a server and hopefully make a little more money). One of them is Giovanni's sister (Gio is a guy that works there. Mostly does dish, sometimes hosts.) And apparently she likes me? About a week before she started they came in to eat with their mom and after they left Gio was like "Dude, i think my sister likes you."
Hey, some random girl actually has a crush on me for the first time in my life? That's cool! Right? It would be, if she weren't 17. If i were still 18 or 19, i wouldnt really care. But now that im 20, even though we only have a 2 year and almost 6 month age difference, i still feel like its weird. I feel like im in a whole new age threshold now that ive hit that 2 decade mark, and she just seems to me like a kid. Anyway, Sammy (thats her) is bi with a preference for girls. She's very forward about asking the girls at work about their sexuality (she'll be mid convo and just be like "wait; you straight?") She makes a hobby of flirting with the straight girls, because as she says it, she can easily flirt with straight girls bc she knows she wont have a chance. As soon as she knows theyre bi or gay, she cant even really talk to them. Sammy flirts with me in excess, has asked me 3 times if im straight, or if im sure that i am (homegirl has only been here like two weeks), and the reason why is because she would happily let me break her heart, and has said thats its too bad im not gay bc if i was she would let me crush her. Also has told me that i remind her of her ex girlfriend, and when i said idk if thats supposed to be a compliment or not, she said "well i really liked her, so..." Oh and btw all 3 times shes asked, I've told her im straight (yknow, bc im not out to the irl general public) and I'll just say that having to lie outloud about my sexuality does not feel that great. Thats not something ive ever had to verbally do before, and now i understand. Tbh i dont really lie, or at least i very rarely do, bc i dont like it, and i want to be seen as trustworthy. i have told my share of lies in my day, but i feel like that was in the top 3 worst lies ive ever told. Simply because i know thats not who i am, yet im saying it anyway.
Besides that, in these last couple weeks ive:
Gotten my computer hacked and almost got scamed out of the piddly $120 dollars total that is in my bank account for me to try to live off of until next Fridays paycheck, and almost got my brother's bank account hacked (looong f*ckin story. Short version, im a gotdang fool, and people are absolute bastards), so now i cant use my computer until i get it looked at, which means no art (sucks bc i wanted to draw myself a bi pride icon)
Put in 103 hours at work in the last 2 weeks
Had our only available car break down twice
Got about half of our kitchen painted. Still need to find time to finish it
Purchased tickets for a convention, and bought almost everything i need to finish my cosplay.
Have a sore in the back of my mouth thats been plaguing me for over a week (finally starting to heal. Its been hurting to do so much as talk, much less eat or drink)
Had to deal with everyone's attitudes at work (some sh*ts going on with the moon and everyones been a pissy ass lately, and im so over it)
The pain in the ass girl at work that we've been trying to get rid of for over a year called in and quit 15 minutes before her literal last shift (Father's day) and our proprietary manager told her "its bullshit that you just found out that your other job scheduled you to work today 15 minutes before you had to come here" and "dont try to come back to this store again". Im ecstatic about it tbqh and feel a small sense of victory about the whole thing.
One of my favorite gays from work had his last shift Saturday night and im still sad about it.
It may not seem like much but its just all around every other day something else small happened to add to the weird and crazy smorgasbord that is my life.
Also bless Sammy bc yesterday was Father's Day, and because of that, i was in the building of my work at 9:45am, started working to get set up at 10, opened around 10:50, and didnt stop until about 8:50pm, 10 minutes before we closed. Our proprietary manager bought us tons of pizza and snacks in the middle of our shift so that we could all take turns having a 10 minute breather, but other than that it was non-stop work and dedication to the customer. At 9:50am my brother went to the Duncan Donuts down the road from us to get the handful of morning people either coffee or bagels or whatever they asked for. I told my brother to get me the english muffin with egg and cheese, and if they had the option, to add sausage to it. Also to tell Sammy i said hi (because she works at that Duncan also, and was there yesterday morning). My brother comes back with breakfast, hands me my food and said that Sammy made it especially for me. (At that time i was also in a bad mood bc i was tired from working four open doubles in a row, and was stressed, so that really lifted my spirits a bit. The food, and the thought that someone made it especially for me.) And i'll just say she just earned my love for the next week at least.
Anyway i think thats all for now loves. I dont have a very eventful life, but i sure do have a busy one.
4 notes · View notes
incendavery · 7 years
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gosh, thank you! that is so sweet??? I hope you (and any other of my followers who celebrate!) have/had a very happy Eid!💖 💕
on another note, I’ve finally gotten around to cleaning out my askbox! under the cut is almost every ask I’ve gotten that i haven’t answered in the past.... I’m not sure. it’s been a WHILE though.
as a warning, there’s all sorts of stuff, and it’s all untagged! also also, if you sent one of these asks and want me to remove it, just let me know!
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yes!! @fuckaspunk IS super sweet and talented and i AM very lucky to have them! and I’ve heard from reliable sources that the feeling is mutual~~💕
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i’m glad my comics make you feel less alone; that’s a rough situation you’re in. i really hope you find yourself in a better environment soon!
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thank you!!!💕
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thank you for understanding! and yes, aidan is a huge help to me??? even when they’re not answering asks, they’re always supporting me in some way, whether that’s making sure I’ve eaten enough, or talking me through my anxiety, or all the other ways they’re there for me every single day💕💕
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ok, my tips are!!:
draw as much as possible! even if it’s just lines and shapes with no meaning, you’re still developing your hand/eye skills
BUT: dont draw if you’re not feeling it! if you’re feeling fried, it’s better to take a break. go on a walk to somewhere scenic, read your favorite book, listen to some new music, hang out with friends, or just take a nap! rest up and find some inspiration! you can come back to your sketchbook when you feel energized again
draw stuff that you like! you’ll improve way faster if you’re passionate about what you’re doing
look at art you like with a critical eye. try to examine the different components and figure out what you think works or doesn’t work. try incorporation those components into your own work
read a lot of tutorials and other resources, but take what they say with a grain of salt
ultimately, remember that the only real rule to drawing is that doing it should make you happy
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good luck!! i do my best not to pick, but it’s a real struggle; i have lots of scars from it too. ;v; im cheering for you!!!
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ALWAYS!!!! if you do, please show me!! my notifications get real busy, but anyone is welcome to IM me any time!
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thank you! i actually get very worried about my style; i tend to admire artists with complex linework and delicate shading, so i often feel my style is far to simple! so thank you!!
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that is really high praise????? gosh??!?!?!? best of luck with the next three years; i hope you grow to be someone you like even better than me!
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thank you!!
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peanut time is the best!! i haven’t gotten to do a proper one in a while though ;-; i’ve mostly been feeding the crows on my way back home from night shifts, when i give them the reject eggs from the continental breakfast.
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wow, neat!! chickens are so wonderful; i cont wait until i can have some of my own :>
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dont be nervous! i know i can be hard to get ahold of over the internet (bc i get overwhelmed easily) and hard to talk with irl (bc i get so nervous and interacting w ppl doesn’t come naturally to me AT ALL) but honestly i?? love making new friends??!
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thank you!!? im thankful every day that someone as radient as aidan is in my life for the long haul
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thank you!!!!!!!💕
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i completely feel that? its ok to hit rough patches! just do your best!!
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i dont remember what i felt bad about but THANK YOU💕💕
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honestly its done me worlds of good to share my art?? hearing people talk about how they go through all the same shit i do makes me feel so much less alone, especially on the toughest days! so i guess thank you, and thank you?
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youre welcome!!!! :>
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huh!! i dont know much about shoegaze (other than thinking abt that post abt the guy who pronounced it like fugazi I THINK ABT THAT EVERY TIME) but thats real neat!! im glad youve found something that works for you!!
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hey, neat middle name! and youre very welcome; i hope things have been looking up for you since you sent this?💕
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i dont remember when this was from but im currently doing really well with my meds!! i switched to a combination of lexapro in the morning and benadryl in the evening, and its been working super well!✨
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thank you??!! ;o; i would love to see all your favorite birds!!
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hey, right back atcha!!!
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:0
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ty!!!
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hey. thank YOU
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you’re absolutely not bothering me! thank you so much!!
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!!!!!!!!!!
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hey, nice! im glad you like both me and my music!
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gosh thanks?!?!
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she is the most beautiful and handsome!!!!!!!!!!!! i love her! thank you from both of us!!!!
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aw, gosh! im sure i like you too!!
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this was from.... A WHILE AGO.... but youre welcome?? i just wish i could have done more
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hey, thank you so much!!!!!
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thank YOU and a very very belated merry christmas!!!
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that does make sense!! reconciling friendships and crushes is tricky business. the best i can say to you is to be as honest and open with each other as you can
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i dont personally get those, but ive heard of people experiencing them as a sideeffect when coming off or switching meds
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i think these two are part of the same message? but oh man yeah that sucks when ppl are misgendering you AND hitting on you at the same time. on a different note, ive never heard of using a corset to stim before! neat!
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i mean, 1. depression doesn’t care if you have a “””good””” reason and 2. ive literally never met anyone w depression (including myself) who thinks that they do have a “””good””” reason for having it. thats the insidious part of depression, is that it makes you think that theres nothing wrong and that its all just you not measuring up in some way
so i guess that would make you.... someone with depression?
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real BAD
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💕 💖 💞  💓  💗
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not yet haha THANK YOU
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hey, im glad you like it!! since this blog has gotten so big, its kinda my happy place to be? (for anyone wondering, my reblog blog/personal is @spinels!
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that IS a fun fact!! thank you!
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it’s absolutely ok! i get a little bitter when people take my work WAY out of context (for example, straight people removing the caption that says “im just really gay” before tagging their bf/gf) but i am 100% ok and happy with people relating to my work in a different way than i intended (ex: a comic i made about being ashamed of my derma getting reblogged by someone struggling to be ok w their visible burn scars)
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hoo gosh, thank you!!
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glad to have you here!! im glad people can relate to some of the weirdly specific shit i write about tbh???
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i’m sorry its taken so long for me to get back to you; that a terrible situation
if you have a teacher you trust, i would absolutely bring it up to them. that is 100% not an ok thing for those kids to be doing. at all.
im glad you at least have your friends that support you! 
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:0 WAIT is this someone i know through ucsc?? :0 :0 :0
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HA 
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aaaa thank you! that is high praise ;v;
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i have no words; this is such a touching message. thank you so much ;v;
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this is belated but!! the main creative community i can recommend is kzsc, the radio station! i had a real cool time there, and its a great way to make friends and connect with ppl of all sorts! :0
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yeah, its totally normal! ive had roommates ive been super tight with, and roommates who i barely ever hung around with. its natural! i doubt you’ll finish college w/o finding a roomie that you get ~The Roomie Experience~ with though, even if its like a housemate or s/t!! ;0
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i’ve never been told that, actually! neat!! (and wow?? i cant believe i inspire ppl.... wow......... what a concept tbh??)
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oh yikes... i do hope youre feeling better :( im glad my comics can help a little bit at least!
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💕 💖 💞  💓  💗!!!
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HUGS
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i dont remember what this was in reference to, but good to know?
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also good to know!?
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i think the crows and jays do! i dunno about the squirrels and other birds. and thank you!!
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the youth gang..... i love it..... how good???!
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i wrote about getting yuri right here! he’s a southern alligator lizard and i love him to bits. 
heres a pic of the Long Boy doin his thing:
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hey neat! i’m glad youve chosen a lame you can be proud of!!💖
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ive never heard of that!! wow
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what play is this?? :0 :0 :0 im so curious now!!
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oh SHUCKS...,,,,,,,,,, ;v;
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hahahaha omg thank u
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i dont actually have any more of them interacting, unfortunately! the owl isnt one specific person, like a lot of my characters are meant to represent. the owl more represents as a whole all the people i run into in my life that i am very very gay for.
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thank you!!!
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youre very welcome! im glad you feel better!!!!
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aaa gosh thank you!!!
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hhhhfgh ive gotten less of it recently BUT YEAH that was bad times™️ 
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thanks for the info!!! :0
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no problem! a lot of the credit honestly goes to @fuckaspunk, who is always keeping me updated on that sort of stuff.
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i didn’t know that! a lot of the symbolism seems to come from multiple sources sometimes, from what ive seen?
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aaaa gosh omg thank you ;v;
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aw thank you???!!
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nice!!! oct 24 bdays go!!!
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thank you!! it really does mean a lot actually!!!!!!!
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of course?? antisemitism cant be ignored in this fight
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aw, thats so cute! id love to hear what headcanons you have tbh???
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hey thanks?! this is really cool to hear, tbh. i try to be positive most of the time, but im not going to like,,, kid myself when im not feeling it and im glad that other people can appreciate that too, ya know?
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wow!!
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(this one!) thank you i love that one too???!
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hey, im glad you found your way here!! thank you so much!!!
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aaaa ty! 
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hmmm i have two leopard geckos, and they made very good beginning lizards for me and aidan! but i would maybe ask someone a bit more experienced than me, like @kaijutegu​ or @wheremyscalesslither​!!
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thank you!!
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one day at a time! (but seriously, thank you!!)
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yummy yummy sauce...... ty!!!
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awww, gosh! thank you!?
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AAAA TY BOTH I GET SO SELF-CONSCIOUS ABT MY VOICE,,,,, ;o;
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:0 i havent watched that, but it sounds rly cool!!
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i like that fun fact a lot! ty!!
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pae stands for paerlin, which is what @fuckaspunk​‘s internet handle used to be! i used it to refer to them on my blog in secret back when they still didnt know i had a crush on them.... ;//v//;
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aaaaa thank you!!!  ;o;
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nice nice nice ty!!
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>:0 get back down here!! (jk that’s rly neat! highfive!!) 
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those are all good words that i like!! thank you!!!!
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i dont know anything about him, but i looked him up and i guess i can see it?!
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@fishcrow is really cool! ive never really interacted with them, but im p sure were mutuals...? anyway yeah their comics are rly cute and cool!
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that is me! thank you; i hope things go well for you as well!
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hello to you too!
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aaaa ty!!! tbh the number of nice anons i get way way way outnumbers the mean ones <3
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thank you! thank YOU for existing!
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:0 chocolate croissant, here i come!!!
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thank you!!!!!!💕
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its literally my pleasure!!!
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aaa ty!!! 💕💕
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hehe im glad! 
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sldf;j;sfjdklfdslfjs thank you so much?????? what a compliment omg gosh
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yeah!! i have a hard time on settling what class id be, but i feel like id be a heart player! 
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ohh um! im not sure which pens youre referring to, but if you mean the ones I use for my comics, i color them with Winsor & Newton ProMarkers, and I do the lines with a purple fine-point Sakura Gelly Roll Classic pen! i also use micron pens of all different sizes and colors in some of my non-diary comic art!
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aww thank you so much!!
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:0 :) :0 !!!!!!
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ty!!! ive grown to love him very much as well!!
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thank you! i hope you are doing well also!!
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i love them very much?!! id put a picture but i dont have one with all four of them so instead imagine me lying on the floor crying abt how much i love them bc thats me basically every day
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you dont mean......
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?!?!?!?!?!?!
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awwww ty!!!
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HEY WOW
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aaa gosh thank you!💕
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DOUBLE FOLLOW
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gay dragons combine the best of both very good things: gay and dragons. im glad you appreciate them w me tysm ;v;
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aaa what a lovely message! ty💕
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3rd-shift-working, depression-having, corvid-loving solidarity fistbumnp!!!!
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huh! ive never heard of that; ill check it out maybe!!
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ah im really glad? tysm!!💕
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my understanding is that it helps people who have text-to-speech readers? but im honestly not as well informed on that as i should be! 
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hell yeah!!!! 
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gosh!!!!!
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hnmngnhng youve probably already made a decision but i just gotta say.........shadow rulez
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delicious!!
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i havent!! i really want to though!
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oh man ALL THE TIME. i usually try to either reality check with someone i trust, or to do an activity thats easy and i know i can do, or both!
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i love andre and karl!!! its actually a huge influence on me and my art tbh??? 
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i had a good (and safe) trip! ty!!!
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hey, thank you!!!
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oh jeez thats bad :( i think this was in response to when i needed to wait between med refills?
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i cant give a precise reason, tbh! when it comes to whats lucky, i just sort of.... go with my gut, ya know?
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thank you!! 👍
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that sure sounds like insomnia! its almost hard for me to say tbh, bc ive had trouble sleeping for as long as i can remember, so NOT having trouble sleeping is bizarre and unrealistic to me haha... but i think the bottom line is, if its interrupting your daily routine and making it hard for you to have enough energy, then its something you should look into remedies for!
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:0 :0 :0
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ohhh how nice! ill give it a try! :>
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omg,,,, nope, just me!
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thank you!!!!!!
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honestly? thats such a good way to look at it i love the idea of my blog as a big zine
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always!!!!! go for it!!!
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hey, thank you so much!!!!!
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omg, thats so great! thank you!
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im so glad; thank you!!!
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thank you so much!💖 (and mexico, neat! i love hearing where people are following from??)
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aaaaaaaaaaaa ;//v//; thank you??? i get so happy whenever ppl tell me they like my singing aaaaaaa
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aw, hey, no worries! money is all well and good, but in some ways, messages like this mean just as much!
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its cool that comic gave you plural feels! im def not a system though :> 
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its tricky, isnt it? i still feel like im no good at it lmao
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LISTEN,,, there is a 99.9999% chance i wont notice, and a 100% chance i wont judge. reblog away! 
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THANK YOU ARENT THEY THE BEST I LOVE THEM SO MUCH
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thank you!! i hope you have a good day as well!
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aaa ty!!💖
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aa ty! (what a cool name!!! im kind jealous ngl!)
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awww thank you💖
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i do my best! i just worry when im not active, bc i tend to connect my self-worth to my output (;^; )
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aaaaa ty!! 💖
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!!!!!!!!!!!! omg wow i love being called a pretty boy???? ty???????
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hey, neat! crow high-five!
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aw, thank you!!! 💖
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im doing my best! thank you so much, messages like this really help when im in a place like that tbh ;v;
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gosh this is so sweet? thank you so muhc !!?
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thank you all!! im sorry that saying thank you over and over sounds so repetitive, but i truely do mean it for every one of you!!!
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i am..... one of those things!
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well thank you!!
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ohoho~✨
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thank you! and honestly im sure it does??
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hey, cool! good for you!!!!!!! and ty!!
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aw gosh thank you!💖
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hey, wow! thats super cool; thank you so much!
(i dont follow the first person i followed on tumblr anymore.... they became a hockey blog rip haha)
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aaaah, thank you so much!!
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almost???
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i do!! drunken lullabies is an absolute banger!!!!!!!!!!
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i am!!!! thank you!!
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aw, ty!!! 💖
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hee hee, thank you! 
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my biggest tip honestly?? have someone who can be by your side to help you with... basically everything... during your recovery. bc trust me, i was n o t  a v a i l a b l e. i spent a lot of my recovery playing 2048 at the same time as watching tv, bc doing both at once distracted me from how much the bandages itched.
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thank you!! (i think this was in reference to getting top surgery!)
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how shitty??????? yikes. i hope your supervisor has your back??? bc wow????
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hey!!! thank you!!! i draw all my comics traditionally on paper! im not sure what you mean by the writing though? if you mean the word bubbles, i do those by hand on paper too!
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I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND THAT FEELING,,,, im so happy ppl talk to me, but i get really nervous about saying the wrong thing. 
when i’m down, i usually crave validation. i like being reminded about things ive done right! i also like gentle reality checks, like, ‘hey: this is the situation, this is what we can do about it. ok? ok’
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i unfortunately dont have any!! i had a couple at one point, but they’ve since been lost to the depths of my old laptop. and hey, thank you so much!!
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now thats a nifty trick!! im terrible at telling all my white tablets from each other lmao
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!!!!!!! ITS ME!!!!!!!!
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maybe you just need some space? i know i sometimes temporarily block people i know, if i need some private space or if i dont trust myself to keep cool and solve problems constructively. do what you need to do to feel at ease, and go from there, ya know?
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thank you!!!
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its,,,, up somewhere above in this monster post lmao i,m so sorry,,,,
thank you so much!!!
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WOW NO WORRIES??,,,,,,,,, INCREDIBLE 10/10???????
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all four of these came right after i gave myself a hair cut and THANK YOU SO MUCH??? i live for validation and it feels so good to have my actions affirmed ;o;
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