#lmfao i hate my brain

[alovesreading]

any fic recs? like fics you just cant live without other people reading?

okay i might not be the best person to ask this because i'm writing two long series at this moment and i barely have time to properly read fics like i used to but i can defo give you a little list of recommendations!

when you say fics i can't live without other people reading, Nothing Revealed In A Common Crisis by my wonderful and incredibly talented best friend @imagine-that-100 is the first to come to my mind! An absolute masterpiece of a fic, alex turner x reader x matty healy love triangle that's just so well written and thought out that it makes me scream. I'm entirely obsessed with it and it truly is my roman empire LOL! (it also introduced me to the 1975 so we love it!)

make sure to check out the rest of N's work fr, all of her series are amazing and if you want one shots, Will We Talk is insanely good and I'm eager for her to post part 3 and All Is On My Side is everything to me as well!

of course, i have to add Aphasia by another one of my besties @red---moon 'cause that fic is just so damn good. I will be forever obsessed with the way Red writes and her characterisation is just so raw and real, it's genuinely inspiring. also if you want some george x reader x matty brainrot, her one shot Indecision is surely gonna drive you mad.

another one of my incredible best friends, @kennedy-brooke put out her first fic Dress which has a part 1 and part 2 and it's so fucking good, I think every George girlie needs to read ASAP!!!!

if you wanna indulge in some fun and really well fucking written gatty content, i have to send you over to read everything @vinylandcoffeecollection has out! In particular, The Cellophane House and its sequel Lost Boys had me in shambles and I loved it so much!!! Another gatty legend is @drinkurkombucha and i would defo recommend all of her work! my favourites will forever be Talking To George and Stranger Than (Fan)Fiction!

i fell in love with a Ross fic i read the other day by @butyou-callmewhenyourebored and i think it deserves more attention. i fully was almost crying by the end of it, it was so sweet and well written!!!

now if you need filthy smut to read, i will definitely be sending you over to @lottiecrabie! she is the absolute queen of smut and everything she has written has left me jaw dropped and gasping for air lollllll!!! (such a shame she's leaving but she will never be forgotten)

also Three's A Party by @abiiors!!! jesus christ almighty, when i tell you i died reading this, i mean it. pure ross x reader x george brainrot.

another one that had me gagged was Satiate by @heavenhealy! that fic had me sweating and screeching like an idiot.

and for the last filthy one that comes to my mind it is @toomuchracket one shot inspired by politician!matty that truly ended my life in the best way when i read it the other day.

let me end this all in a wholesome cute note and put you on dad!matty because Playing On My Mind by @ughgoaway has me in a chokehold and the little extras they have been posting have me swooning and wanting to die for dilf matty!

it's fair to say that this fandom is filled with talent and i have too little time to properly indulge in all the great pieces everyone puts out so this list is way too short! but i hope you enjoy this messy but great list lol!!!! i really hope that by the time i'm done with the long series i'm currently writing, i can read much more and actually give a longer and more organised list. hope this helps anyway!!

#A's asks #can you tell i suck at shutting up #went on a rant for no reason #lmfao i hate my brain #much love to everyone in this list tho! #amazing talented people all around!!

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

this is how it feels to chew 5 gum being a barnaby/howdy enjoyer. im Unwell

#im just staring at a wall rotating them in my brain. constantly. no coherent thoughts theyre just There #its like... hate to Expose myself but yk that one supernatural episode #that was filmed like a mockumentary by the Ghost Hunter Guys. yk the episode with the 'gay love saves the day' quote #yeah yk the scene where the guys are screaming trying to escape cas but everywhere they turn / each door they open Cas Is There #that is also what it feels like being a laughingstock enthusiast #im trying to escape it. i cant. theyre Everywhere. #i go to sleep thinking about them. i wake up and theyre one of my first thoughts #ITS TOO MUCH! theyre too good.... #if youre reading this and youre like 'theyre cute but i dont really ship them' #Its Already Too Late. #cause thats how i felt. i thought they were gonna be a silly nonserious concept in the back of my mind #a crackship yk #look at me now... #laughingstock #i thought franklydear was gonna be The Welcome Home Pairing for me #i love them so so so much theyre everything but laughingstock is More. Somehow. #then again! we'll see what new characters and dynamics arise in the future! things may change! #but for now... mentol ellness over the dog and the caterpillar #that sounds like a childrens book lmfao

[ofantediluvian]

The littlest things give Dove euphoria

#i wrote out the word lipstick bc I was like oh this makes sense then I doodled it #and was like…will people understand that. do they know that’s what I mean #&:):&:():? #anyways this idea wouldn’t leave my head and now I can rest #brain was like don’t forget it you gotta do it right meow #fav art of dove is from 2011 and no one was calling her dove then so I had a hard time finding my reference �� #saved it this time I won’t make that mistake again #even now I’m like…do people use dove for her??? how should I tag this????? #also using my hand holding a bottle of lotion as reference that’s why it’s kinda wonky #I’ve talked too much in these tags but damn I hate my handwriting lmfao #also hc that dove paints her nails red too she really accessorizes with it #and yes the red isn’t doves actual color in hs it’s just TOO BRIGHT #dove strider #fem dave strider #homestuck #homestuck fanart #my art #o art

[ball-of-butter]

i remember being genuinely scared to ship mareven because im a toddler that uses tiktok so my first intro to mareven shippers were just crazy maven stans who romanticise his mental illness. i remember one so vile i had to comment hate on it because they were bringing my bae mare into this like mare get behind me rn. and then they doubled down saying her rejection to maven made him more mentally unstable LIKE it was her responsibility???

#this is why most my mutuals are marecal shippers 😭 #i meam tumblr mareven shippers tend to have more self awareness thank GOD #had me defending marecal and mare AND cal individually on that app. it just wasnt pleasant #and then them chalking up his evilness to lie the blame at elara’s feet only. ewwwww ur misogyny is showingggggg #the lack of media literacy on that app is making me stress so much im going bald #fr was trying to not ship mareven bcuz i could not be seen with those embarrassing mfs. its why im on tumblr now lmfao #like why cant yall just ship mareven not in a platonic or romantic way but in the secret third soulmate way as intended why do yall have to #-be weird and rot ur brain when it comes to black haired blue eyed evil white twinks?? #red queen #red queen series #war storm #glass sword #kings cage #maven calore #mare barrow #mareven #this post started with mareven now i want to just rant about how bad those maven stans are at understanding his character #maven would hate yall irl #and they always treat mare as a self insert when shes such a strong character on her own. shes behind me and i have guns out blazing at yal #rewriting

[klaissance]

indulgent established klance long-distance boyfriends coalition paladins/BOM keith reunion event GO:

keith gets to the dinner early

he had to ask kolivan to put him on the list as one of the BOM agents going and if that dude ever laughed at anything keith would swear he was laughing at him when he uninvited somebody else to put keith on the list

it's this gorgeous bigass hall with lovely vaulted ceilings and the biggest longest table keith has ever seen

aproned aliens are in set-up mode, scurrying around setting utensils and plates and namecards and chairs all around this table

keith has his mask up and everything and he nods respectfully at some of the staff as he starts to walk the length of the table

it's been too long since he saw the team he knows that and they know it too

he knows they miss him, knows it in his bones that they miss him at least some fragment as much as he aches for them (which is so much all the time)

pidge hacked a touchpad to let it transmit through the signal jammer outfitted at the BOM base so he does get to message and call home sometimes but tbh he's not on-base very often before he's jetting off to the next crazy mission halfway across the galaxy

anyway he's in this hall scanning the namecards and letting his mind wander while he waits for the guests--but mostly his former team--to show up

he finds his own card next to kolivan's, only it just says "blade of marmora guest" anonymous and replaceable, just like usual

allura is set to be seated at the head of the table with the other important people and key speakers

keith smiles despite himself at the thought of allura pacing the halls of the castleship this past week, running through versions of speeches for anyone who will listen

the smile turns into an ache when he thinks of lance, perched on the kitchen counter, legs swinging, or draped across the lounge couch, head tipped off the edge, listening and humming appraisingly at all the right moments

turning those warm brown eyes to the ceiling and pretending to think hard on it when allura asks him if he thinks she's ready

"of course princess" he'd say, placing a hand on her shoulder and squeezing gently

"I think you were born ready"

because lance has always been good at that, at making you feel like the most capable person in the Universe

halfway down the opposite side of this grandiose table, keith finds what he hadn't known he'd been looking for: four name placards right in a row, each labeled with a name and "Paladin of Voltron"

takashi shirogane, pidge holt, hunk garrett, and lance mcclain

keith frowns sourly at the next name, some alien duke or duchess or whatever the fuck, somebody important who has just won the diplomacy dinner lottery by being offered the seat next to the blue paladin

he looks across the table from here to his own seat, looming positively miles away across and down this long ass mcfreaking table

who made this chart anyway???

keith is still grumping about it as people begin to show up and he shrinks a little into himself, scanning the room for those familiar faces, the anticipation buzzing under his skin

he's so lost in the looking that he forgets himself and gets totally ambushed by a voice right up against his ear

"Getting on just as socially as usual, I see"

he whirls ready to FIGHT but it's allura !!! and the relief and joy at seeing her in person for the first time in multiple space-months is such whiplash that he pitches straight into her open arms and holds tight

when he recovers he takes down the mask and squirms awkwardly

allura is gentle and kind, knows he hates the diplomacy part, knows he's only here because he misses all of them, one of them in particular...

they do small talk for a bit, allura growing worse and worse at hiding her amusement as keith continues to turn and stare at the door with increasing frequency

her eyes are sparkling the way they do when she gossips and she asks him point blank "so, you must be excited to see your boyfriend again"

keith's mind goes blank "n-no" yknow like a liar

she's downright snickering at him and he still can't resist scanning the room

she throws him a bone, tells him the other paladins are running late coming back from the parade but will arrive soon

keith is like coolcoolcool no doubt no doubt but really cannot stop staring at the door and feeling like he might throw up and is his hair okay he didn't really think about this before he showed up, hasn't even seen it in actually days because he's had the suit on, and the suit is DUMB what the fUcK--

they get approached by other diplomats from various coalition planets and allura turns on the schmooze

keith checks his touchpad--there are three messages from lance

"SORRY BABE RUNNIGN LATE"

"c u so SOON :3 <33333333"

"*RUNNING"

" :D "

#long post #my writing #this isnt a fic but like isnt it though #could make it one officially i suppose #this is really how my brain works though it's in colorful bullets #so so close to being real prose but not quite #klance #keith and allura being besties #bom keith #coalition lance #ermmmm idk what else to tag this #vld ficlet #sort of #idk lmk if people enjoy this type of post or if this is pointless for u #if u like it i can do more i have lots of these in a doc #if u hate it i can be more focused on turning them into actual fics #OH NO IT NEEDS A PART TWO BC CHARACTER LIMIT LMFAO

[tmos-time]

btw i am spreading eridan propaganda today; 5'3" eridan's rise up lmao

#sweetmagemakesart #eridan ampora #homestuck #short king eridan being 'heavyset' (for lack of a term i like that people wont bug me about) comes with the deal btw lol #and obviously no actual hate to people who like skinny/tall eridan headcanons i just go 'whguh huh' when fan content doesnt match-- #--my brain version of eridan lmfao

[wabblebees]

just finished the new fantasy high episode and havent seen anyone talk abt this so i wanted to say i am 100. one HUNDRED PERCENT sure. that fuckin fourdogs was at that party invisibly (the One And Only buttfucker to NOT make an obvious appearance?? rules-follower or no, i dont believe that for a SECOND) and that she stole the piece of the cloud runner that went missing, and that the moment of her swipe was the "something" riz missed on his check -- i also really *hope* it wasn't oisin that made those damn ice mephits (or "muffets" as my beloved drunk adaine christened them lmao) act up like that, but immmmm pretty sure thats exactly what was goin on since it wouldve given his party member advantage/an easier access point :/

#dimension 20 #fantasy high #fhjy spoilers #listen i was oisin to be good & real & nice SO BAD. HOT RIPPED TATTED DRAGONBORN WIZARD ??? PLEASE #but. im also a suspicious-ass bitch lmao #also wait ik they spelled his name without the accent on his character art #but doesnt the name oisin have an accent over one of the i's?? idk jack abt shit so i could be wrong ofc #in any case. i like the concepts behhind the ratfuckers as a party (*except buddy. seeing him made me feel fucking ILL lmao.) but #i neeeeeeed them to get fucking TROUNCED by the bad kids. i NEED it. theyd be so much more tolerable if they got briefly asswhooped #like i think after that they could TOTALLY be friends and work together. before that?? FUCK no lmfao #anyway. i love-hate fishykitty whatserbucket and i need to see her lose #i cant wait for the ratgrinders to meet the unstoppable force that is the bad kids bigass hearts #deciding to team up with local shitheads & therefore turning them into op allies by sheer force of will and love #its happened to ragh its happened to aelwyn it kiiinda happened with kalina (jury's still out but my fingers are crossed!!) #spring break i believe in them!!! #bee speaks #its happening yall. i try to keep my incomprehensible blorboposting to a dull roar but now that im fully caught up on d20 i fear i may start #going full pepe silvia trying to figure this out #i cant binge it all in one go and have it rot thru my brain like slow-eating acid to leak thru in a contained matter #waiting for a new episode every week means i have time to THINK

[ohbo-ohno]

y'know originally i had a big "yay i finished my exchange fic!!" post planned but it's literally an entire week late soo. that feels a little pathetic at this point el oh el

that being said - i finished my exchange fic! i have absolutely no control over when it will be posted, but i'll make sure to put it here when it is!

please please please go follow the deadcoddoves twitter account if you're at all interested in this exchange, they'll be posting about everyone else's fics too!!!

#never ever doing writing a fic with a deadline attached again. im too much of a chronic procrastinator for this #i have learned some things about myself though #(1) i tap out at writing about 4k words a day lmao. after getting that much written my brain is drained completely #(2) i am really really bad at not putting things off until the last minute. which i already knew but WOW this made it obvious #anyways!!! gonna go read all the fics i've missed this week! ceil im coming for you #also if we're deep in the tags and confessing things... #y'all i am sooo self-conscious about this fic LMFAOO ohh i hate it. i hate it so much. #thinking about turning comments off on ao3 for it tbh #but i think part of that is because it's so late. like this damn fic was a full seven days late and it's not even my best work??? #ohhhh i am Embarrassed. well and truly humiliated #anyways my counterplan is to write a bunch of other stuff im proud of so i can stop feeling like shit lmfao #the mods were very patient and kind tho shout out to them for not hating me

[twilight-skies]

Haven’t even finished the series but here’s my first official ATLA headcanon: when the state of world has reached modern times, like another seventy-hundred years after TLOK, there is a widely critically-acclaimed musical theater production known as “Aang: The Last Airbender” a historical drama retelling of the journeys of the Avatar and companions that ended the Hundred Year War. Idk I just really love the idea of people in the far future retelling this absolutely surreal part of history with the same themes of “the world turned upside down” “history has its eyes on (us)” “the narrative/the story they will write some day”and “who live who dies who tells your story”

#up to y’all if it’s really good or horribly inaccurate #this was obviously inspired by Hamilton so I like to go with pretty well researched but some things were clearly changed #avatar the last airbender #atla #atla headcanons #this just came to mind as I was listening to Yorktown and my brain for some reason thought of the OWL liberating Ba Sing Se #(no I haven’t reached s3 but I know the gist of what happens) #lmfao #oh my god imagine Ozai getting portrayed similarly to king george but just more of an asshat #and zuko sorta having Burr’s role but reversed? where it begins with hating aang(alex) but slowly coming to his side?? #avatar: the last airbender

[charmac]

X

#high again #lol #went on a weird deep dive and some info about sunny drives me insane #but it’s so weird and like. does. anyone else think of this. #or am i just weird? #anyway my job i do a lot of #law.. and real estate #and **** ********* <- i just hate what that is #i avoid the latter seriously and i’m about to quit bc i hate it so much #anyway i do things like. llc formation and operating agreements and shit #it came to my attention that rob and ryan’s gay ass wrexham llc is rr mcreynolds #christ that’s another level of homoerotic but moving on #rob uses the same address as some other llcs #and like. guys. there’s an ‘entertainment’ llc he formed in 2005 that’s still active #sunny obviously #but what’s it called? it’s always sunny #no #lol nope. lol. the rob entertainment company that he formed in 2005 and is still active today is called #johnny tablewipe inc #i’m so serious lmfao that’s wow. that’s info in my brain rn. #that’s sunny at it’s core guys #always sunny in 2005 and to this day operates under johnny tablewipe inc #i hate them fuck i love them that’s so stupid #yk what started recently #that is kinda it’s own thing and would need its own entity? #yeah the podcast llc name is fantastic loll #does anyone care… or am i insane? #i’ve accepted my mania has reached an all time high anyway we ride

[moe-broey]

Also whenever I talk about Sharena being overlooked in favor of Alfonse I feel SO bad and SO hypocritical because while I am very unwell about both of them it just. Manifests in different ways. Sharena is like a plushie to me she's a friend she's full of love and joy and softness. I occasionally succumb to madness and have divine visions over her but most of the time she's Sharena my good friend Sharena :) Meanwhile with Alfonse it's like. I am constantly psycho-analyzing him I am studying him and taking notes I need to bite him I need to put him in situations I need to take him out of situations I need to tuck him in at night and kiss him on the forehead and I need him to get pegged. I'm so sorry 😔

#i promise i don't hate women i just. have. very different feelings about the two of them. #which manifests in like. i could tell you one million highly specific facts about alfonse #and sharena is just. rotating in my brain. music box ballerina style. #she's more than that. she's SO much more than that. #but also there are no problems ever at all actually :) everything is so cool and fun and we can just hang out :) #meanwhile i'm sending alfonse directly to hell. i'm making him confront the horrors head on. hand in LOVING hand. #sharena #fe alfonse #i'm infodumping SO much LMFAO a bitchman has a lot to fucking say apparently. #soon. i will take a nap for 99 years.

[ironmanstan]

I am coming to the realization i have been slowly killing myself with work i think oops

#m thinking now and im like #i havent read ... anything consistently .. or watched anything .. or had time to like do anything #in genuinely so long #and i was like kinda becoming ok w it #my brain issues .. nothing matters i dont need anything all i need is me i dont need to have anyone or anything with me <- bad. stop it #part of this was the i need my dad to be proud of me braincell but well i win award i have 4.0 gpa and he still yell at me #deciding now to stop caring so much (i still do but ill ignore it) i need 2 be alive again i dont care #im so mad i dont even know .. im so viscerally angry like actually i dont even know what to do with that lmfao #my brother does shit all and u give him sm slack have NEVER treated him as bad as youve treated me #and nothing i do NOTHING is good enough or changes how u look at me #like idk he called me and i cried so much i got so fucking upset i fhkdhdkf ok. ok. #he will b like omg im so proud of u i love u so much ive always believed in u and i just think back to when #he yelled at me once like fiiive years ago and i was like u just make me feel so worthless all the time #and he was like yeah bc you are worthless #and im like hmmm idk bestie i dont think youve ever changed from looking at me like that and it is insanely obvious lmao #i dont even know bro im crazy. m insane got given an inch and tried to take a mile like omg i can actually be recognized as worth something #nevermind ill stop killing myself for that pipe dream now lol #m not even upset im just mad lmao i dont wanna hate my dad and i dont but every day i feel more and more like i should #vent

[general-kalani]

Gd so extra random but IMAGINE Jacob letting your muse cut his beard. Already have an open for that yes BUT eyes are closed. He's practically fallen asleep.

Your muse tries to cut his throat or smth because he's never gonna know but his hand shoots up, grabs the wrist. "Too low. I know ye wan' kill me but I ain't lettin' it happen that easy."

The braincells this is taking...

#{ out of the empire } ~ ooc #The general speaks #I love and hate that I can have something as detailed as this pop up #ESPECIALLY when half asleep #Strangling my own brain for it LMFAO

[hella1975]

normal again :)

#what the hell was even all that!!!! #im still going through it but like. ive been better today like i didnt just ferment in a dark room hardly eating #and i also got some writing done that actually worked exactly how i wanted it to and i had that age old 'ive still got it!' moment #bc every time i encounter so much as a stone in the road of my writing i convince myself im terrible always have been terrible #will never be good ever and everyone hates me. so there's that #and then i actually interacted with my family and left the blinds up and now we just ordered a take out together so im just. existing #someone is having a paintball battle in my brain still but im being much more chill about it today god bless #and that's all that matters! as long as no one can TELL im going through it it doesnt count! showing emotions is bad! for the love of GOD #dw im pissing myself off too it's okay LMFAO #im gonna answer some asks though! bc not only is there a shitton again but also that always puts me in a good mood #sorry to anyone who has sent me time sensitive asks in the past few weeks. my motivation has just been dead #i do see and enjoy everything i get sent though so please dont feel like it was wasted and ill hopefully still answer it :) #hella goes home

[sovaharbor]

my dad totally has a stomach bug and just got a call from his doctor he needs to take antibiotics for a couple days to see if that finally nips it in the bud for him because apparently this has been Ongoing for a bit and i'm being really not normal about this, thanks

#like what do you MEAAAAAAAAN you 'keep going to the bathroom' and have been for days!!! what do you MEAN!!!!!! #My own tummy is very not happy 2day and i feel like im being insane like there are multiple reasons this could be happening but who knows : #<- multiple reasons that are Not stomach bug related. #still .ugh. UGH. my therapist and i were literally talking earlier today!!! about how if i could just hurl and get that over with maybe my #phobia wouldnt be so bad! i literally TOLD HER IM LESS SCARED ATP OF PUKING FROM A STOMACH BUG THEN I AM OF PUKING FROM A PANIC ATTACK #AND NOW. HERE I AM. STARING GASTROENTERITIS IN THE EYE. AND IM LIKE UMMM NEVER MIND ACTUALLYYYYY :D :D :D :D :D #i hate my life. lmfao. #summer's text tag #ocd is so stupid emetophobia is so stupid i need to be NORMAL BRAINED ABOUT THIS!!! I CANNOT LET THIS RUIN MY LIFE ANYMORE!!! RAAAAAGGHHHHH #<- <- <- deleting this post later btw. sorry to mental breakdown on ur dash. will be back to normal shortly (maybe)

[twistedappletree]

i don’t think ppl understand that when you have anxiety and you have 1 appointment on your day off, your entire day off revolves around that appointment. “oh but it’s at (insert time here) so you’ll have the rest of the day to do stuff!”

no tf i won’t because i’m gonna be getting ready for this stupid appointment like 5 hours early since i’m obsessing over time to prepare and get to the appointment at least 30 minutes to 1 hour early so i can sit in my car and stress even more lmao like??? idk how to be normal about it at all

#apple babble 🍎 #non fandom #my appt today is at 2:45 and i haven’t been able to think about literally ANYTHING ELSE #it’s actually fucking horrible lmfao #and i wanted so bad to just have today to chill and calm tf down from the work week but i can’t even have that #bc of my stupid brain dude i hate it rip it out i dONT WANT IT