#might make it a running list if i feel like it

[gi4hao]

🪁 ˎˊ- their favorite thing to do with you

— aka my take on what makes them express their love for you in a special way <3

— reblogs and feedback are always appreciated!

— seungcheol + nighttime cuddles

it’s one of the rare moments when he can fully let go of his responsibilities and turn his brain off so sign him up. he’ll speed run his entire shower routine just to get five more minutes of calm cuddle time before bed. big spoon, little spoon, it really depends on his mood; but he’ll always make sure you feel held and protected no matter what, and so will you.

— jeonghan + going for a walk

at first he didn’t notice how much it meant to him. but after some time spent away from you, he realized how much he missed your silly little walks. they don’t always have a purpose, and it’s what makes them so nice. you two just wandering around town, hand in hand and your arms swinging at a regular pace. it fills his heart with nothing but love, because he thinks the world always looks a little more beautiful when you’re with him <3

— joshua + making plans for the future

whether it’s planning an upcoming trip or something more distant (your wedding for example…), joshua loves talking about his future with you. he likes to picture you in his life forever, and to hear how you picture him in yours. sometimes it’s just sleepy late-night conversations, sometimes it’s the two of you cuddling in bed and creating pinterest boards on your phones. that way when one of you gets stressed about the future, you can remember you have a lifetime to figure things out together.

— jun + watching your favorite movies

especially at the beginning of the relationship! i feel like jun could ask you to make him a list of your favorite movies and offer to watch them together, because it’s a great way to get to know each other on a deeper level. and he’d be happy to make a list of his own as well! obviously many inside jokes would emerge from these movie nights, making you the kind of insufferable yet cute couple that can hold a full conversation with no one else understanding.

— hoshi + dancing in the kitchen

sometimes it starts with him slowly swinging from left to right as he hugs you from behind, leading to something rather tender. other times it’s him grabbing your arm and making you twirl on some catchy pop-rock song. it’s his own way of expressing how happy these small moments of domesticity make him. of course he’ll also throw some singing in there, and yes he will snatch the wooden spoon from your hands to turn it into a mic.

— wonwoo + taking pictures

there are two sides to that. the first one is when a particularly aesthetic situation occurs and you both take a bunch of pretty pictures. the second one is more personal, more spontaneous. it’s wonwoo sneaking snapshots of you doing mundane things like brushing your teeth or petting a stray cat. it’s also taking low quality selfies of the two of you doing nothing in bed (with you often wearing his clothes), or just during any moment you’ll want to remember and cherish forever.

— woozi + napping

ok let’s be real here: a busy man needs to optimize his time, which means that you will get dragged into bed with him so that he can collapse on top of you and sleep like a log. but what makes it fun are the moments when he shortly emerges from his slumber and changes his position like some sort of touch-starved zombie, frowning until he gets to trap you in his arms again. he loves to say you’re exaggerating when you tell him about it, but you’re absolutely not…

—dokyeom + day trips

he loves loves loves making memories with you, so he’ll gladly dedicate half of his weekend to go on various day trips with you! he’ll pack your lunches himself, make sure you don’t have to carry any bags throughout the day, and even carry you on his back if your feet start to hurt. your camera rolls are filled with pictures of these little trips, and he wouldn’t mind talking about them for hours to anyone who will listen. he might even make a little handmade scrapbook of these memories for your valentine’s day gift :3

— mingyu + grocery shopping

you always go to the same supermarket and the cashiers all think you’re their cutest clients because of how happy you look together. there’s just something about the way he pushes the cart while reading the grocery list out loud that makes you feel like the luckiest person on the planet. also, mingyu will always insist on buying you a little treat during every grocery trip. even when you’re not with him, he knows which ones are your favorite and he never ever gets it wrong.

— minghao + museum dates

it’s the epitome of peacefulness to him. holding your hand as you wander among the artworks, discussing them, sharing your thoughts and sometimes cracking jokes in each other’s ear. when he sees you getting closer to a painting or a sculpture, he’ll stay a few steps back to take a picture of you, a proud smile on his lips as he captures the moment. “again?” you ask when you catch him in the act. “you know you look too pretty to only take one,” he replies, leaving a kiss on your temple.

— seungkwan + skincare routine

you shared a face mask with him once and it’s become a regular occurrence ever since. of course seungkwan knows how to do his own skincare, but it’s so much better when you do it for him! head resting on your lap, you could make him wear your stupidest headband and he wouldn’t even complain. he likes how gentle you are when applying the products on his face, and he looks at you like you’re the most precious thing he’s ever laid his eyes on.

— vernon + flea market

he likes everything about it. he likes that little game you have of pointing two remotely associated items and saying ‘us’. he likes to come up with backstories for the things that are being sold. and you like to remind him of that time he pointed at a trinket and asked “who even buys that?” right in front of the person who was about to get it (but he lets you laugh about it, because he just loves hearing your laugh). all in all, it’s a privileged moment where he gets to enjoy the beauty of simple things with his favorite person, and that’s all he’s ever wanted.

— dino + supporting your passions/hobbies

let me explain! obviously he loves it when you keep him company while he’s training or when you patiently listen to him ramble about it; so he’s really careful about reciprocating that energy as much as possible. that’s why he often comes to support you at your sports competitions, art shows, or just any kind of hobby you might have. he shows genuine interest and will always your biggest cheerleader no matter what, always pushing you to do your very best in what you love.

#seventeen x reader #seventeen fluff #seungcheol x reader #scoups x reader #scoups fluff #jeonghan fluff #jeonghan x reader #joshua x reader #joshua fluff #jun fluff #jun x reader #hoshi fluff #hoshi x reader #wonwoo x reader #wonwoo fluff #woozi x reader #woozi fluff #dk x reader #dk fluff #dokyeom fluff #mingyu x reader #mingyu fluff #minghao x reader #minghao fluff #seungkwan fluff #seungkwan x reader #vernon x reader #vernon fluff #dino x reader #dino fluff

[mrghostrat]

Heyyo! Glad you liked my drawing, it was a lot of fun to do and I hope to do more in the future when I have time!! :D

Onto the proper question: I saw your reply to a question about Azi's weaknesses and you mentioned him having the classic weaknesses.

Does this include the vampiric weakness to running water? I just needed to ask because I feel like this one is always forgotten!

Thanks in advance! :))

ohh yess i wanted to make a list of these, so ty for the reminder! i always forget about running water (how does that work with dracula crossing to england via boat? 🤔) so i might leave it off because that's the kind of thing i forget about until suddenly it causes a major inconvenience in the plot 😂

i KNOW i'm gonna be forgetting some important shit but god there's so much. i'll come back and add to this if i miss anything:

repelled by garlic (overwhelms his senses like brain fog)

burned by silver

burned (and repelled) by crucifixes

burned by direct sunlight (safe under cloud cover)

burned by holy water

can't cross salt (and burns to touch)

must count spilled rice (sorry not sorry)

must be invited inside (only the first time)

can't be seen in mirrors (can be seen in photos)

can't enter consecrated ground

can only consume blood (human food/drink makes him sick)

can transform into animals

has dominion over wild and stray animals

can hypnotise/glamour/befuddle

has minor control over nearby weather (fog and rain etc)

can't float on thin air, but can walk on walls and ceilings

edit: super strong

edit: fast healing wounds and high pain threshold

killed by:

wooden stake to the heart

beheading + salting + burning combo

excessive holy water exposure

excessive sunlight exposure

#ask a rat #still a little torn about the blood one tbh #tempted to make him able to eat/drink but it doesn't sustain him; sate him; or give him any energy #purely empty calories #just for that good good gluttony

[kingtrash-fox]

I am writing this because of HATE.

Hate for this DENTURE LOOKING BASTARD.

Am I overreacting over the death of an Alligator NPC gone sentient? Maybe. Is it justifiable? Probably. Am I still gonna write this? YES

So you know that one YT video called 30 Ways to kill Yoshi? I’m making a list of ideas for yall to torment Y’all’s Caine Plushie for Gummigoos death and Pomnis need for therapy. Also Jax might be satisfied with the bloodlust I’m displaying and I hope yall will maybe commit? Not a guarantee or a demand but hey here’s hoping.

Play Baseball with him.

Throw him in a river with his limbs all tied up

BLIND HIM With Various flashlights

Give him cavities (Just smear some sweets on him. Bonus points if it’s gummy Alligators.)

take a picture. Upload that pic on your computer. And digitally tear it apart. Congrats you killed the closest thing to Canon Caine!

Car. Just run his ass over.

Baseball reprise: Get a BaseBall Launcher. Tie Caine to a Pole. Unleash hell into him.

throw him into a Pit!

Drown his ass in a bucket of Water

Just Put a Spamton Plushie near him. The power of Spam Emails and the [HOOCHIE MAMA] might just cause him to simply fade to nothingness

make him look at R34. Note: Might not work since he has seen the horrors of Content Farms

just put him in the sun for an hour in Arizona. The heat might cook him like an Egg.

Get a Pomni plush and a Jax Plush. Give em guns. Unleash the firing squad into him.

Get a Gummigoo Plushie. Get your Caine Plushie. Give em both Guns. Dual at high noon. Ps: Blind Caine using the sun or something. (WARNING: Don’t use actual guns use BB guns or something like that so you don’t ruin your Plush this applies to both Gun Based Suggestions. Thank you.)

Go to a Tall Ass Building. Tie a Penny to Caine. And drop that boy off. If it’s Heads He’s dead! Tails he’s still kicking. Repeat till you get tails.(I’m gonna make a part 2 so I figured I might as well make the Halfway mark a nice one)

and @gooseworx feel free to share some ideas for ways to mess with TADC plushies!

#the amazing digital circus #Caine #Pomni #Jax #gummigoo #Baseball #unbridled rage #Reblog coming tomorrow hopefully #Caine will pay #Rip Gummigoo #gooseworx #animation #glitch productions #SMG4 #Unironically the rage is real Gooseworx is a real magician

[wc-confessions]

Yo. This is going to be a long rant since I am currently reading Tallstar’s revenge. I really hate Sandgorse. And I kind of hate Palebird, but mostly Sandgorse. (Cw; Abuse) I put the warning since Sandgorse is clearly abusive, though people tend to overlook that. So I’ll be explaining a little bit about what he’s done to Tallpaw. When it comes to the abuse toms in the series, people tend to often ignore or just downright deny that. (Ex: Crookedstar ironically enough and I’m not talking about on Rainflower’s end. Goosefeather, Tigerclaw (To be clear from Mapleshade and Pinestar. Pinestar is neglectful while Mapleshade groomed him). So I will argue with you if you disagree that “Sandgorse isn’t abusive"; he is. He’s a god-awful father. If CPS was a thing in this universe, I’d call them on him. 

Early on in reading Tallstars Revenge I liked Sandgorse for his passion for digging and because he seemed like a super caring father at first. But as the story progressed, he just started pissing me off. I hate how he cares more for damn tunnels than he does for Tallpaw’s own well-being and what he wants. I hate how he tried to force Tallpaw to do something he didn’t want and then cold-shouldered him for rightfully being terrified. As I got to chapter 14, it’s clear he’s just plain emotionally abusive, and overall, he's an emotionally absent father from Tallpaw. He doesn’t care about Tallpaw’s feelings and often dismisses how visibly uncomfortable he was. 

He insulted his son and brushed off his concerns when the tunnels flooded. I liked him and genuinely thought he was interesting since nobody ever elaborated on why he was "bad,” but Jesus. Nobody ever said he was outright abusive. Like Tallpaw himself says, “But what I want didn’t seem important.” That is how terrible Sandgorse is. That is how his Abuse affects tallpaw. All throughout chapter 13 of the SE, he constantly thought about becoming a tunnel just to please Sandgorse. It’s so fucking obvious that Sandgorse is a shitty and abusive parent. But then again, abuse in the Warriors universe is often overlooked because of how poorly written and portrayed it is and because, in general, not many readers are educated on the different types of abuse and factors involved. That or either they just deny it even exists. I feel so bad for Tallpaw. Even after how Sandgorse treated him, he still loved his father enough to run away from home just to avenge him. Sandgorse is such an ass. And he should’ve even been grateful at all that he had a tallpaw considering his other kit finchkit died. And I love Sparrow (so far, let’s hope he’s still an angel). I love how he pushed Tallpaw to care about what he wanted instead of trying to make Sandgorse happy. I love that he encouraged Tallpaw to follow his own path instead of letting him think that his feelings and what he wanted didn’t matter.

 Ew and the dirty looks Sandgorse kept giving Tallpaw Chapter 14; Page 250; (digital copy)

“Tallpaw snapped his head up and tried to catch Sandgorse’s eye. Before he pushed his way through the heather, his father shot him a look that stabbed Tallpaw’s heart.”

Someone, please help this poor child. Even Dawnstripe (who is his mentor if you haven’t read the SE’s or haven't read Tallstar's yet) could see how shitty he treated Tallpaw.

“Dawnstripe brushed softly against Tallpaw. “Why don’t you run to the first marker?” she suggested. “It might wake you up a bit.” Tallpaw heard sympathy in her mew. She saw how Sandgorse looked at me.”

“Why can’t I have normal kin who care about my training and who are proud of me?”

The fact that he feels so unloved by his parents is genuinely tragic to me. He’s one of the cats in the series that deserves better than anyone. Along with Bumble,Turtle Tail, etc. There’s probably some others, but I have bad memory, so I can’t list them all. This poor cat is continually plagued with grief and feelings of failure, feeling like everything is his fault. It was heartbreaking to see that he thought Palebird would hate him because he felt it was his fault her friend Brackenwing died. Even Sandgorse believed that he’d killed Brackenwing. Though Palebird imo is just as shit about believing it too, I won’t just shit on him for that.

And Sandgorse is such an ass for shit-talking his own son to Sparrow: “A flood scared one of the apprentices, so yeah, it’s all his fault that we can’t tunnel, and I hate him.” And then, in the next chapter, he just dies. And Tallpaw risked his life to save his abuser.  I cannot stress enough how much he deserves better than what he got. He risked his life; he was fully ready to throw away everything just to save his father. He didn’t care how badly he’d treated him; he still loved him. And Hareflight pisses me off. He saw how Shrewpaw kept bullying and picking on Tallpaw and didn’t do anything to stop him, but as soon as Tallpaw beat Shrew's ass, he wanted to act like Tallpaw was in the wrong. In fact, I wouldn't even call it bullying at that point because it's gone so much farther than that. 

.

#text #confession #warrior cats #feligis69 #sandgorse #tallstar

[imfinereallyy]

cw: drugs, morally grey characters

The bathroom doesn’t give the kind of quiet Steve needs right now.

What should have he expected in a club on Friday night?

Fuck, think Harrington. What would Robin do?

She probably wouldn’t have gotten caught in the first place, that’s what. God she is going to kill him if he doesn’t check in later.

Steve takes a deep breath, trying to get comfortable on his spot on the toilet. His jeans are going to be disgusting later.

The bass thumped loudly throughout the bathroom. The walls shook as the music makes its way in as the door swings open with each patron rushing in out.

He is never going to get the kind of privacy he needs to get out of this.

The red glow of the lights seems more fitting for a place for people to fuck in rather than take a piss, but Steve supposes that maybe it’s the point.

Coming to blank, the point was to either get fucked or get fucked up.

Running his hands through his hair, Steve went over his options.

1. He has a knife in his boot. Steve isn’t afraid of the consequences of killing a man, his soul lost the right to be saved a long time ago. But he doesn’t feel too good about killing someone at random. Death should have a point if it is coming from the hands of a man. He’ll leave the pointless deaths up to a god he doesn’t believe in.

2. He can try and make a break for it. He only has a sea of partiers to get through, at least half of them on coke or molly. And make it to the parking lot without getting caught by security, and then find a way to get home.

Fuck.

3. Dump the drugs, flush them down the toilet. Worry about money later.

Considering the guy after him is a fucking FBI agent, and Steve would love nothing more to get rid of a glorified cop, he doesn’t feel like putting his face on the top of FBI’s most wanted list.

Flushing it is.

Steve takes the baggies of coke out of his pockets. Sure, he won’t go away for long if the agent caught him with it, but it will give the bureau an opportunity to try and get him to talk, and Steve despite popular belief isn’t fucking stupid. He isn’t going to talk.

Even if he wants to, Steve is sure that his head would have a pretty little bullet hole in it before he even steps into court for arraignment.

No matter who his father is. Maybe especially cause so.

Steve can feel the sweat start to pool at the bottom of his shirt. He hasn’t taken anything tonight, maybe he should thank that mythical god he doesn’t believe in for that one. But Steve’s stress is going up with the temperature of the room.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Steve stands and kicks up the rim of the toliet, he can’t afford to miss.

His head starts to pound with the base.

Bump. Bump. Bump. Slam.

The world crashes with noise. Steve has no time before his stall door is thrown open. Steve forgot to lock the fucking door.

Steve throws his hands up, baggies still in his hands, sweat dripping down his back. Chest heaving up and down, Steve is frozen at the sight in front of him.

It’s not the FBI, which is good.

It’s not his boss, which is better.

But in front of him, is one of the most beautiful men he has ever seen. A dark shadow lit up but the red lights. Long, curly black hair falls upon a red silk shirt. Tattoos, rings, piercings…everywhere. Big brown eyes staring directly at Steve.

Gorgeous…

Unfortunately he’s not only one of the most beautiful men out there….

“Hey there princess.”

…but also the most dangerous..

“I believe you have something that interests me.” The man all but growls.

Eddie fucking Munson.

Steve finds the courage to speak, “Yea, what’s that?”

A wicked grin spreads across his lips, “A ticket in.”

Steve’s worried he might have to make a deal with the devil.

🪩🫧🍸 🔪🥂🫧✧˖°

#morally grey Eddie Munson #morally grey Steve Harrington #like they are gonna be fucked up in this one #well if I continue it #it might be nothing #I just love morally grey steddie I need more of it #morally grey steddie #steddie #stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #my writing #ao3 #modern steddie #modern au

[otomiyaa]

Requests Closed!

Thank you guys, for the support and requests! I'm glad to know you're interested in them*w* I put all requests I intend to write in a list. These will be written in random order, progress will be updated in this post, I'll add a link to my pinned post later :)

Note: If you didn't state platonic/romantic/erotic then I put them under platonic. If that's incorrect feel free to leave me a message!

Also if there were double requests with the same lee/ler/dynamic I combined them! Last but not least, these are a lot so I'll try my best to write them but cannot promise anything, and it'll probably take me ages hehe.

Platonic:

Ler!Tsukishima & Reader: 50. “So why don’t we see who’s more ticklish?”

Lee!Xiao & Reader: 41. “No, I’m not ticklish there.”

Lee!Muichiro & Reader: 12. “Yes. Of course. No I mean.. huh?!”

Lee!Akaashi & Reader: 06. “Could you… do that to me?” + “I really can’t believe how ticklish you are.”

Lee!Boothill & Reader: 03. “I thought you weren’t ticklish.”

Lee!Luke Pearce & Reader: 43. “Don’t tell me you actually forgot how ticklish you are?”

Lee!Freminet & Reader: 49. “Please don’t tell me you heard that?“

Lee!Blade & Reader: 47. “I wasn’t even touching you.”

Romantic:

Lee!Zayne x Reader: 22. “Don’t laugh, I’m trying to talk to you!”

Ler!Aventurine x Reader: 06. “Could you… do that to me?” + 09. "You and I remember this game very differently."

Ler!Kuroo x Reader: 13. “That’s… quite an attitude for someone in your position.”

Ler!Scaramouche x Male!Reader: 16. “I was trying to sleep!”

Lee!Xiao x Reader: 12. “Yes. Of course. No I mean.. huh?!”

Ler!Sugawara x Reader: 06. "Could you… do that to me?"

Ler!Gojo x Reader: 34. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

Ler!Luigi x Fem!Reader: 13. “That’s… quite an attitude for someone in your position.”

Lee!Loid Forger x Reader: 34. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

Ler!Hawks x Reader: 35. “Maybe next time when I can actually move?”

Ler!Wriothesley x Reader: 32. “It’s been a while since you laughed.”

Ler!Hatori Sohma x Reader: 01. “I promise I won’t tickle you.” + 18. “Wait… That tickled?”

Lee!Blade x Reader: 18. “Wait… That tickled?”

Lers!Kate & Yelena x Reader: 05. “I didn’t steal anything!”

Ler!Loki x Reader: 13. “That’s… quite an attitude for someone in your position.”

Lee!Vyn Richter x Reader: 47. “I wasn’t even touching you.”

Ler!Diluc x Male!Reader: 11. “So, what will be your next excuse to tickle me?” 

Lee!Caelus x Reader: 44. “I can’t let you go unpunished.” - anon I received your message while I was finishing this post so exactly the right timing!

Ler!Chigiri x Reader: 17. “You have three seconds to run.” - this came like 1 minute after I closed requests so still accepted dear anon!

Lers!Lucifer, Solomon, Barbatos & Reader: 06. “Could you… do that to me?” / 13. “That’s… quite an attitude for someone in your position.”

Erotic:

Lee!Lyney x Reader: 07. “For the next hour, I’m all yours.”

Ler!Diavolo x Fem!Reader: 08. “I know other ways to make you laugh.”

Ler!Aventurine, Blade or Ratio x Reader: 06. “Could you… do that to me?” / 18. “Wait… That tickled?” 

Ler!Rosa x Fem!Reader: 44. “I can’t let you go unpunished.”

Lee!Dan Heng Imbibitor Lunae x Reader: 49. Please don't tell me you heard that.

Lee!Albedo x Reader: 07. “For the next hour, I’m all yours.”

Not accepted / Pending:

All requested non reader pairings, sorry guys but it's specifically a x reader writing event, no ships this time 😭

Alastor x Reader - idk who that is ^^;

Ler!Jiraiya x Reader - sorry anon I barely know/remember Jiraiya's character, if you want feel free to send another one (check my list for guidance).

Ler!Toji x Reader - he looks hot but I still haven't seen JJK S2 hehe oops, I'm afraid I can't write it but might change my mind if I end up watching it later on.

Ler!Mirko x Reader - I kinda totally forgot about her character, sorry!

#x reader tickles #follower milestone #am I going to finish all of these omfg #to be continued~

[pttucker]

"By the way, about the next scenario…" The scenario of the 'Middle Island' was a preparatory one for the main island's Great War of Saints and Demons. Cheok Jungyeong nodded his head, seemingly having misunderstood what I said somehow. "Now that I recall, you are a Demon King, are you not? Alright. If I'm destined to fight you, then I swear to give it my all." "N-no, hang on a sec. That's not what I…" "This great one shan't be tethered to the unnecessary personal emotions of fate during our true battle, so you can rest easy." No, hang on. I'd much rather prefer that you be tethered to your unnecessary emotions, though. Somehow, I now had to pray fervently that I don't become Cheok Jungyeong's target during the upcoming scenario.

Have I talked about how much I love Cheok Jungyeong yet? Because I really, really love Cheok Jungyeong.

This man is 100% down to fight with Dokja any time, any place, any enemy. Including Dokja himself, apparently.

What a guy.

#oh but now I have a baaaaaaad feeling about this #target??? #there's going to be TARGETS in the scenario? #oh wow I wonder who would be the WORST person for Dokja to get right now...or to get Dokja #ESPECIALLY since there's no failure consequence listed so is it possible that one of them might actually fail this scenario? #and oh wow wonder who the constellations could be RUNNING FROM RIGHT NOW #ahhhhhhhhhhhhh don't you DARE hurt him Joonghyuk I swear!!! I'm hoping Dokja can make him listen with his new technique #though at least Dokja got a little bit wider and taller again now that he's gotten some of his stats back #so at least now he's not teeny tiny like Jihye 😂 #orv novel chapter 363 #orv #orv liveblog #orv spoilers #omniscient reader's viewpoint #kdj #Cheok Jungyeong #yjh

[sensesdialed]

DEFAULT VERSE CHANGE

as of 11/22/22, the majority of replies (asks/threads/starters/etc) that are NOT explicitly set during a specific timeframe will default to peter’s post-trilogy/college verse. depending on who/what the interaction is, this could be nwh compliant or include my alternate version of the ending where the memories of peter stay intact. the point is they’ll automatically take place while peter around 18/19 years old, enrolled at esu, and living in his own apartment 

of course i’ll still be writing plenty of stuff that takes place during and in between the trilogy, especially if i feel it fits the prompt better, he’s just no longer being automatically placed somewhere in that hoco-ffh area 

#🕸 ❝ it’s not a onesie ❞ → psa #🕸 ❝ i’m coming up it might be my calling ❞ → headcanons #there i hope this makes sense HDGFDH #me vs the urge to overexplain EVERYTHING #it's just . i've been writing peter for a long time (five years next may) and i feel like i have exhausted myself #of so many concepts during his high school years that they tend to get repetitive #plot relevant stuff is DIFFERENT i will still do that *especially* during nwh stuff but !! there are so many more routes #and concepts i can take and run with this way lmao #now i think about a list of more specific hcs for this timeframe DGHJD

[pussy-ache]

#bpd #could be trauma. could be an overproduction of cortisol affecting my pituitary gland #and it’s a catch 22 for me because (if i truly have BPD) i can’t accurately assess my behaviors #like. i’d like to THINK i’m not a manipulative person but what if i am? how can i trust that i haven’t been fooling myself? #and hurting other people in the process? #but i also don’t like being the center of attention. but maybe i’m manipulative in worse ways #i also fit everything for regular BPD. not just the impulsive subtype #like i do actually believe i have this the vast majority of the time. there’s just not much that can be done #it’s like … ‘’here’s this awful terrible personality disorder. you got it. it’s a list of shit that makes you an awful person. have fun!’’ #like it’s not something that i can personally investigate very often #so many studies i’ve read conclude with shit like ‘’yea this group of people sucks just like we thought. can’t trust them & there’s no cure #and i’m terrified to even ask for medical help anyway cuz it’s also one of the most stigmatized mental disorders to be diagnosed with #right up there on the same level of stigmitization that schizophrenia gets — which also runs in my family incidentally #and my family members who developed it did so in their 30s-50s …. symptoms didn’t start until super late #consistently afraid of my own mind and personality with nowhere to turn. i can’t subject that on anyone. #which proves the inabilily to retain long lasting meaningful relationships correct #i have a history of dipping early #and i’ve been called cold and distant in a relationship. i retain too much independence. #superficial stings a little #all my life it’s like ‘’wow i feel a lot. i might be an empath’’ #and in reality it’s ‘’no actually. i have a personality disorder that amounts to me being an overbearing crappy person that feels a lot.’’ #here’s some studies that prove that #i’m just a very. very. very. tired person #sigh

[queer-crusader]

Nothing brings me closer to the edge of "huh maybe I do have a touch of the autism" than shopping

#anne speaks #as in i fucking DESPISE it unless it's specifically catered to me #i need to be warned about it in advance. i need to know what time we're going. ideally i need to know what time we're done #i have to mentally prepare myself and dedicate a specific amount of energy for the act in advance #and so help me gods if i bring my mum i will full on rage quit within two hours #she's one for 'oh this piece of clothing might be good for you' then holds up the least me thing in the world #or goes all 'uhh i dont know...' concerned if it either shows too much cleavage or is not neat and feminine enough #and then on top of that is like #okay but that costs money so how about we go to an extra store that you werent prepared for to see if they have the same thing but cheaper #you CANNOT add to my mental list of what im expecting im running FAST out of my prepped energy and i WILL start snapping at u #she asked what i would like for my bday and i was like 'well okay i do wanna refresh my wardrobe a little' #she asked what im thinking of style wise but like a) how do i say mum you cant buy me clothes without me feeling like a silicon valley wife #and b) how do i say 'i want butch i want gender i want playful i miss my theatre days i want artist i want boho' #anyway. i have now been convinced to go shopping with my sister who is a lot more tolerable bc she's young and hip and less scared to play #but im still like 'okay what time? okay give me a second to think if i want to go? i need to mentally adjust' #and my mum kept saying 'oh you can go then and after youll come back together' THATS NOT A TIME MOTHER #i need to know! when im going!! so i know how much time i have to mentally prepare #anyway. this is my essay on why shopping makes me autistic #there is Very Little that does this to me. usually i embrace chaos #but oh man. yeah no thanks #anyway fingers crossed everyone that i come back from town looking artsy and gender

[this-doesnt-endd]

I need to start doing my physical therapy exercises again

#ive noticed its been increasingly more comfortable to stand with my foot at an angle #also like not feeling my knee as much lately and like yeah thats a seperate issue kinda #i didnt expect to gain much if any of the bit of feeling a lost in my right side #they said physical therapy might help or it might not #i didnt expect it to #i think its the muscle disorder and how prominent it uses to be specifically on the right side that just weakend it #either way its just another thing to add to the list #and speaking of list i have to go see my ent tomorrow at 11 and tell him the nose spray sucked and i stopped using it not telling him that #but like i havent had a runny nose latley cause it switched back to stuffy when i got a cole and eventually it will switch back to runny #where the nose spray didnt do much to help but the biggest issue is #is that i still have a constant post nasal drip runny or stuffy and i can feel snot run down the back of my throat and id appreciate not to #its awful to wake up every morning and hack it all up its awful to feel it cause it makes a gross lump in ur throat #im usually tasting it first or right as my nose starts to bleed and its awful #anyways i feel like im leaving there with no answers #also my primary care dr never got back to me on an explanation of my blood work or the ct i was supposed to get for my nose #so im calling about that tomorrow i gueas

[froqgy]

I booted up dmc3 for like the first three missions to do really quick and i was just like arghhhh i wish i was playing dmc1 instead LOL

#dmc1 is so easy (used yellow orbs a few times bc did not want to restart the levels) #but like also overall i didnt feel it was that button mashy #also a lot less required enemy kills per rooms it feels isk #also its very cozy bc ur just going somewhere and then and then to another realm but like . <- it feels small #and cozy u might think me crazy for ssying that #for dmc3 its like gotta pull out my list and make sure i have the right weapon equipped to do the stupid adjudicators #dmc1 has op grenade launcher and alastor lightning attacks and no combat ajudicators #ive never used ar for nevan excspt for it being required for a secret mission #however. i did do cerberus on my first try and also that secret mission right before i sometimes run out of time #but it was such good rng with cerberus. really satisfyinf

[piplupod]

.

#tired of having to be smart abt everything #i would like to be able to make mistakes or ''bad'' decisions #everyone is like ''well why dont u just buy xyz thing if u want it and can afford it?'' and i cant rly say #''well its because i might have to pack as much as i can carry and run away from home pretty soon'' #so im not exactly eager to add to my belongings that I'll have to leave behind or leave other things behind so i can carry the new thing #and i cant say that bc thats trauma dumping or innappropriate or smth and makes ppl feel uncomfortable and bad #so i just sit and smile and say ''ahaha yeah i guess :)'' and then dont bring it up again #i would love to be able to go and buy a bunch of things shfjdldl my wishlist and needed-tool list are both growing so much #and i just. cant :''')))

[pibsboots]

I've always had chronic fatigue. I remember being twelve, and an adult mentioned how I couldn't possibly know how tired they felt because adulthood brought levels of exhaustion I couldn't imagine. I thought about that for days in fear, because I couldn't remember the last time I didn't feel tired.

Eventually I came to terms with the fact that I was just tired, and I couldn't do as many things as everyone else. People called me lazy, and I knew that wasn't true, but there's only so many times you can say "I'm tired" before people think it's an excuse. I don't blame them. When a teenager does 20 hours of extracurriculars every week and only says "I'm too tired" when you ask them to do the dishes, it's natural to think it's an excuse. At some point, I started to think the same thing.

It didn't matter that I could barely sit up. It was probably all in my head, and if I really wanted to, I could do it.

When I learned the name for it, chronic fatigue, I thought wow, people that have that must be miserable, because I am always tired and I cannot imagine what it would feel like if it were worse.

Spoiler alert, if you've been tired for a decade, it's probably chronic fatigue.

Once I figured that out though, I thought of my energy as the same as everyone else's, just smaller in quantity. And that might be true for some people, but I've figured out recently that it absolutely isn't true for me.

I used to be like wow I have so much energy today I can do this whole list for sure! And then I'd do the dishes and have to lay down for 2 hours. Then I'd think I must gave misjudged that, I didn't have as much energy as I thought.

But the thing is - I did have enough energy for more tasks, I just didn't go about them properly.

With chronic fatigue, your maximum energy is obviously much smaller than the average person's. Doing the dishes for you might use up the same percentage of energy that it takes to do all the daily chores for someone else.

If someone without chronic fatigue was to do all the daily chores, they would take breaks. Because otherwise, they're sprinting a marathon for no reason and it would take way more energy than necessary. We have to do the same.

Put the cups in the dishwasher, take a break. Put the bowls in, take a break. So on and so forth. This may mean taking breaks every 2-5 minutes but afterwards, you get to not feel like you've run a marathon while carrying 4 people on your back.

Today, I had a moderate amount of energy. Under my old system of go till you drop, I probably could have done most of the dishes and wiped off the counter and then been dead to the world for the rest of the day.

Under the new system, I scooped litter boxes, cleaned out the fridge, took the trash out, cleaned the stove, and wiped off the counter and did all the dishes. And after all that, I still had it in me to make a simple dinner, unload the dishwasher, and tidy the kitchen.

It was complete and utter insanity. Just because I sat down whenever I felt myself getting more tired than I already was.

All this to say, take fucking breaks. It's time to unlearn the ceaseless productivity bullshit that capitalism has shoved down our throats. Its actively counterproductive. Just sit down. Drink some water. Rest your body when it needs to rest.

There will still be days where there is nothing to do but rest, and days where half a load of dishes is absolutely the most I can do. But this method has really helped me minimize those, which is so incredibly relieving.

#chronic illness #chronic fatigue #chronic pain

[heart-of-the-morningstar]

✨His Queen✨

Short drabble I wanted to write because I am unwell for this man…

Lucifer x f!sinner reader

Summary: Your first time with the King of Hell, and he might be even more nervous than you are~

(I don’t even have a set up for this, I’m diving in head first like I would for Lucifer. This is just porn without plot 🤷🏻‍♀️)

Tag list: @trashbin-nie

@yellowsubiesdance

@j-jinxee

@stevensdickrider

@airwolf92

@mrssabinecallas

@myhornybrainonlyknowsthis

@bee-sinner

@thesoccerenthusiast

Warnings: 18+, smut, humping, pet names, oral (m & f receiving), fingering, p in v, service top!Lucifer

All throughout, the only thing that could be heard in Lucifer’s home was the sound of your lips crashing into his relentlessly. Your nightgown draped over his legs while sitting in his lap for at least an hour now, on his throne, no less. You’re breathless, your lips are swollen, and you can’t get enough. You haven’t pulled apart in what seems like an eternity, Lucifer moaning into your mouth as your tongues intertwine. However, you’ve become increasingly more aware of the bugle that’s growing between your legs. Ever so slowly, you start to rock your hips back and forth. Lucifer instantly freezes from the sudden sensation, inhaling sharply.

“I’m sorry,” you apologized sheepishly, “I didn’t mean…”

Lucifer cut you off with another kiss before you could finish your sentence. “Please don’t stop, love,” he whispered.

Blood rushes to your cheeks from hearing those words. You felt Lucifer’s hands travel down the sides of your body, stopping at your hips. You start rocking your hips again, eliciting such sweet moans from him. He was so sensitive and you knew it, you knew you could make him putty in your hands and that excited you!

“F-Fuck, sweetheart…,” Lucifer moaned, “this is…this feels amazing.”

One of his hands slid down your thigh at an agonizingly slow pace and you continued your motions. His hand stopped when he felt the soft cloth of panties. He tried to hide his small smirk from you, but you caught him. You knew the fabric must have been wet, and it’s clear from his reaction that he noticed too.

“May I, my angel?”, Lucifer asked softly. You nodded your head wordlessly. You stood up almost too quickly as Lucifer reached for the hem of your panties. You felt them get dragged further and further down your legs until they finally touched your feet and hit the floor. You resumed your potion, straddling Lucifer once more.

He reached down to press his fingers at your folds for the first time. You felt your face heat up, it was something you’ve been wanting for so long. Lucifer exhaled heavily, his painted cheeks flushing a different shade of red. You could feel his hand trembling against you.

It’s been a while since he’s been intimate with anyone, Lilith had been gone for so long. Lucifer had been so alone during that time, never pursuing another lover. Until you, of course.

Noticing his hesitation, you brought your hands to his cheeks, cupping his face. His shining red eyes stared into yours as you leaned in for another kiss. “It’s alright, Luci, take your time,” you soothed him.

“Thank you, love,” he smiled. After a deep breath, Lucifer finally began to tease your entrance, running his fingers up and down your slit. You grabbed onto his shoulders as if you were hanging on for dear life. His thumb found its way to your clit, circling it slowly. You couldn’t help but let out a moan. His fingers began to push up into you, thrusting them in and out of you at an even pace.

You rested your forehead on the crook of his neck, your cries were stifling and your checks were burning. “O-ohh my God, Lucifer, you fee-feel so good.” Lucifer placed his lips on your neck and began to bite and suck every inch of it. Your knees were becoming weaker and weaker, you felt a tightening in the pit of your stomach with every motion of his fingers.

But suddenly, Lucifer removed his fingers from you, making you whine in protest. You pulled your head up to ask why he stopped, but it became very evident. He brought his fingers to his mouth and began to suck on them. You pushed your face back down into his shoulder to hide your reddened face.

“Mmmm, you taste absolutely delightful, darling, ” he murmured in your ear. “I need more.”

Without warning, Lucifer scooped you up in his arms and carried you to his bedroom right across the hall. You always forgot how strong he was considering his stature, but it never failed to amaze you. Once he reached the side of his bed, he laid you down as gingerly as possible, positioning your head onto his pillow.

“Wait,” you said, pulling yourself upright and positioning yourself on your knees. You reached for Lucifer’s shirt and began to unbutton it hesitantly. Lucifer said nothing, only nodding, letting you continue your work. His face became flushed once more, you couldn’t help but smile at the way you made him feel. Almost prideful. Almost.

You made your way to the last button and gently push his shirt off his shoulders, letting it hit the ground. He was beautiful, his pale skin was mesmerizing like a marble statue. But he was warm, very warm, you noticed as you ran your hand down his chest. “Beautiful…,” you said to no one in particular. But Lucifer had impeccable hearing.

“My love, nothing compares to your beauty,” Lucifer sighed. “I want to devour you. Please, let me see you?”

With some hesitation, you reached down to the bottom of your nightgown to pull it up over your head. Your body now laid bare before him. You went to cover yourself with your arms, but Lucifer held your wrists before you could.

“Don’t cover yourself, darling,” he pleaded, “you’re the most intoxicating creature I’ve even had the pleasure of laying my eyes on.” He leaned into you again and planted a passionate kiss on your lips, you couldn’t help but moan into him. He pulled away, looking longingly into your eyes. But only for a moment. His eyes couldn’t resist trailing down to look at your chest, his face turning beet red.

“My eyes are up here, Luci,” you said jokingly.

“Forgive me, sweetheart,” Lucifer apologized and snapped his head back up to look at you once more. You chuckled and pulled your hands away from his loose grip to grab his instead. You placed each of his hands on your breasts, almost making Lucifer lose his composure. “So soft…,” he murmured as he began to softly knead at your skin. “Lay down on your back for me, love. I only had a small taste of you, I have to have more…”

You gulped hard, doing as he says. You untucked your legs from under you and rested your head against his pillow once more. You stared at the ceiling, too embarrassed to think about what was happening. You felt Lucifer’s sharp hands on both of your knees, snapping you out of your trance and forcing you to focus on him.

“Open up, angel,” Lucifer asked sweetly. Whenever he spoke like that to you, it was impossible to say no. With a shaky breath, you part your legs, exposing your glistening pussy to him. Lucifer’s shaky breathing echoed in his large bedroom. “S-Shit,” he choked out, “forgive me for this.”

Lucifer’s head fell between your legs in an instant, his hands resting on the inside of your thighs. You let out a strangled yelp at his tongue began to lick up and down your wet folds. Fuck! It felt better than you could have imagined. His tongue darted in and out of you, his lips vibrated against you and he moaned and hummed from lapping you up.

“L-Lucifer, f-fuck ohmygod!,” you cried out. “Don’t stop, please don’t stop!”

“I wouldn’t dream of it, my dear,” he responded coyly. You could feel a smile creep across his face as he continued to eat you up. Lucifer took one of his hands and placed two of his fingers right by your entrance, it was almost painful waiting for him to put them in you. “I need you to cum for me, I’m not stopping until you do,” he whispered before plunging his two fingers into your ruined cunt once more. That alone almost sent you over the edge. He began to pump his fingers in and out of you, faster and faster, while his tongue tortured your clit. He continued at a relentless pace, never giving you a chance to relax. Your mind was beyond foggy, you couldn’t even tell him to stop even if you wanted to. Which you didn’t.

“Luci…L-Luci I’mgonnacumFUCK,” you nearly yelled. The tightness in your stomach was threatening to snap. You gripped his soft and silky blond hair as he brought you to the very edge.

“Promise?,” Lucifer responded while pushing a third finger inside of you.

That was it, your head snaps back and a breathless scream escapes your lungs. Your orgasm hits you like a freight train. You feel your walls start to pulsate around his fingers which refuse to slow down. Lucifer devours the mess your soaking pussy made while letting you ride out your high. You finally come back down to earth (so to speak) and are able to breathe again, beads of sweat pooling on your forehead. Lucifer retreats his fingers from you and takes one last taste of you from his now cum-soaked fingers.

“Mmmm, fuck sweetheart, never tasted anything more enticing than you in my entire existence,” Lucifer praised. You brought your hands to face to cover up your cherry red cheeks. His words never failed to make your head fuzzy.

“Luciferrrrr,” you whine playfully, “you can’t just say things like that!”

Lucifer chuckled, “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you, love.”

You propped up onto your elbows. Lucifer had straightened up and was now on his knees in front of you. Your eyesight trailed downward and it was obvious how hard he was. His cock painfully straining against his pants. He noticed your stare sheepishly looked away.

“Your turn,” you said as you crawled towards him, only stopping an inch away from the large bulge he had in his pants. It lit a fire in you. It was his turn to be devoured.

“Y-You don’t have to do that, hon, I’m alr-”

You cut him off by placing your hand on his clothed cock. Lucifer immediately tensed up. “You’re right, I don’t have to,” you said looking up at him with ravenous eyes, “but I want to.” You heard Lucifer audibly gulp. “On your back, Luci,” you coerced.

Lucifer nodded and did as you said. He made his way to his pillow and laid down, holding his breath. You began your ascent, crawling and hovering over him. He looked so adorable beneath you. Your hands made their way to his belt, pulling it off in a flash with a clank to the floor. The button and zipper were next. Carefully you undid both with ease. You reached for the hem of his white pants and eased them down his legs. All that remained were his briefs. And my God, they left little to the imagination.

It didn’t occur to you until just now that you’ve never seen Lucifer’s dick before. It drove you wild just seeing the outline of it. He was huge. You bit down on your lip without thinking, Lucifer looked away from you in embarrassment. It was then that you noticed the large wet spot on his briefs from his leaking tip. He was an absolute mess, all because of you. A wonderful sight to behold, for sure.

You couldn’t wait any longer. You reached up to pull down his briefs, setting his cock free at last. It was impossible to look away, you knew you had to eat him up immediately. His dick continued to leak precum onto his stomach, Lucifer’s hands gripped the sheets beneath him as he watched you inch closer and closer to his cock. You placed your hands on either side of it, massaging everything around the one area he needed you to touch. He bucked his hips up at your touch impatiently.

“Please,” you heard Lucifer beg, “pleasepleaseplease!” The sounds of his desperate pleas sent waves of pleasure through your body, it drove you mad. Not wanting to torture him any longer, you took ahold of his cock and placed his tip into your hot mouth. You heard a broken moan escape from him as you lapped and sucked on the head, licking up every drop of precum that had leaked out. It was salty, but you didn’t mind. He tasted divine.

You began to bob your head up and down on his shaft, taking in as much of him as you possibly could. You knew you would choke otherwise. Your one hand remained on his hip to keep him from bucking up into your month while the other hand pumped his cock in tandem with your mouth. You figured it might be fruitless to try and hold him down since he could overpower you in an instant, but you knew he wouldn’t ever hurt you.

You saw that he was unraveling quickly, but you didn’t want this to end so soon. His staggered breathing and wanton moans were music to your ears, you’d do anything to keep hearing them. You trailed a long lick up from the base of his shaft to the head were you peppered a few kisses. One of Lucifer’s hands flew to his mouth to keep himself from being any louder than he already was while the other white-knuckled the bed sheets. It was an absolute dream to see the King of Hell be undone by you.

You felt him throbbing in your mouth, you knew he was close. But all of a sudden, two hands flew to your shoulders to push you off. “Wait, wait, wait!,” he pleaded as you let go of him completely.

“Oh my gosh, I’m sorry! Did I hurt you?,” you asked ashamed.

“No, no! Of course not,” he reassured you, placing a hand under your chin. “You…fuck, you felt so good, my love. But…”

You didn’t even know what happened until you were on your back now looking up at Lucifer hovered above you. You noticed his eyes had turned a haunting red and yellow, with black slit irises piecing your soul. His horns had burst from his head with torn flesh wrapped around the base of each, adorning his snake-shaped halo with a burning flame below it. His angelic wings sprouted out from his back, enveloping the entire bed in shadow. His tail had popped out as well, whipping back and forth behind him as if he were a predator on the hunt. You were his prey.

“I’m having a really hard time keeping it together, darling,” he spoke quietly, almost ashamed at his lack of control. His more demonic form caught you off guard, but you weren’t afraid. You smiled at him, reassuring that you were alright. He smiled back, showing off his large sharp teeth. It made you shiver. God, you wanted him. And you wanted him now.

“I-I need…shit…c-can I…,” Lucifer fumbled over his words, struggling to form a coherent sentence. You cupped his face in you hands and planted a soft kiss on his lips. You reached one hand up to stroke one of his wings, curiosity getting the better of you. You could have sworn it was the softest thing you’ve ever felt, you were entranced. Lucifer let out a low hum, his wing leaning into your gentle touch.

“Yes, you can, Lucifer,” you murmured into his lips. “Fuck me now, please, I need you…”

His composure broke completely. His lips crashed into yours with a vigorous force. You wrapped your hands around his neck to bring him as close to you as he could possibly get. You felt the head of his cock graze your entrance. You whimpered at the sensation. Lucifer looked at you expectantly, only for you to silently nod your head.

All you felt next was his cock sliding into your pussy until he was fully sheathed inside of you. It took a few seconds to remember how to breathe again. He stretched you out, filling up every inch of you completely. Lucifer couldn’t help but bite down on your shoulder, desperately trying not to cum right then and there. After only a moment or two of getting used to his size, your body started to relax around him.

“Please move, Luci,” you moaned.

Lucifer retracted the grip his teeth he had on your shoulder and placed his forehead onto yours. Ever so slowly, he started to shift his hips, taking his cock out just to pump it back into you at a rhythmic speed. But of course it didn’t take long for him to pick up the pace, his thrusts becoming more and more staggered and uneven.

You could have sworn you were seeing stars. Or perhaps it was the light bouncing off the tears forming in your eyes. It was a pleasure you’ve never felt before. You felt whole. That new knot in your stomach was tightening once again, and was threatening to release with more force than before.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Lucifer whispered, clenching his teeth and screwing his eyes tight. “Gonna cum, love…gonna cum, FUCKFUCKFUCK!”

Quickly you wrapped your legs around his waist, making sure he stayed in place. “M-me too, sshhhiiit,” you managed to choke out. “Cum in me, pleasepleasepleasecuminmeLucifer!”

Those words made him incoherent. He held your hips down as he thrusted into hard and fast. At last, you felt him throbbing inside of you, emptying his load into your waiting cunt. You screamed as that sensation pushed you over the edge as well, your newly painted white walls pulsating on his cock.

Both of you could hardly catch your breath, your orgasms finally fading away. He stayed inside of you for only a minute longer before pulling out. Your body mourned that sensation already. Lucifer fell down next to you in the bed, his demon form receding. You watched as his chest rose and fell at a slow and even pace. He turned towards you and smiled, he tucked some hair behind your ear that had fallen in your face.

“Thank you for that, my angel,” he spoke softly. “You were perfect.”

You couldn’t help but smile. You scooted your body closer to him, nuzzling yourself into his chest. Still so warm. “No,” you said, “thank you, Lucifer. That was heavenly…no pun intended!”

He chuckled. “Funny you say that considering where we are, my little duckling.” He grabbed you by the waist and ever so gently placed your body on top of his. He let his wings spread once more, wrapping them and his arms around you in a soft and tender embrace. “I love you so much, sweetheart.”

You smile and gave Lucifer one last small peck on the lips before your body collapsed from exhaustion. “I love you more, my king.”

~~~~~

I’m not seeing the pearly gates after this one, lads!!

But please let me know what you think of my very first NSFW fic, I was nervous about writing about something I’m not well versed in 😅

I had fun though and that’s what matters!

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel smut #hazbin hotel x reader #lucifer morningstar #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin lucifer #lucifer x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer smut #my writing

[deadsetobsessions]

Sea Cryptic! Danny AU- Pt. 7

[Pt.1] [Pt.2] [Pt.3] [Pt.4] [Pt.5] [Pt.6]

“I’m having a child.”

Danny stared at Batman.

“…Uh, congrats?”

Batman whips out a stack of paper and a pen. “It’s you. Sign here and initial the highlighted spots.”

Danny instinctively, from years of dealing with Vlad, whacked the stack right out of Batman’s hands and into the bay. He doesn’t even feel bad about littering this time because, “Begone, fruitloop!”

Wait, no, that’s not what he meant.

“I mean- I have parents!”

“Not for long.” Batman muttered and then did a double take. “You have parents? How?”

Danny gasped, placing a hand on his chest to clutch his metaphorical pearls. He ignored Batman’s mutters. Everyone knows the vigilante has an adoption problem. At least, everyone who lived in Gotham did, as everyone who didn’t was somehow convinced that he “worked alone” or some bullshit like that. “Are you naturally this insensitive or were you dropped on your head as a baby? Obviously I had to come from somewhere.”

“They’re still… alive?”

“And kicking,” Danny said, inching away from yet another rich weird guy trying to adopt him. “Mostly the kicking part, though.” He said, remembering the sparring sessions. His mom could kick his as six ways to Sunday with nothing but jiu-jitsu and still have time to work in the lab.

“I see.”

“I’m charging you extra for the emotional upheaval. I have trauma regarding rich people trying to adopt me.”

Batman sullenly handed over a thousand.

“Sweet. There’s a group of shades down here asking if you could find their murderer. Apparently the serial killer is still at large.” Danny pointed.

“Of course. Tell me everything.”

The adoption papers disappeared as Batman went into detective mode.

Danny shoved the cash into his glowing chest and breathed a sigh of relief. He needed to make rent this month so it was a windfall running into Batman.

——

“Hey, Tim?”

Tim woke up from his Power Nap. “Huh?”

“Phantom’s complaining that Batman kept trying to adopt him.”

Tim blinked. “Uh.. what does that have to do with me?”

Danny stared at him, a patiently amused smile on his face. “Just in case the rumor about the Wayne’s sugar-daddy-into the Bats was a thing. Other than that, we might have to confront Batman to get him off of Phantom’s back. ”

“You… want to confront Batman.”

“Hey, man, Phantom’s a friend and it’s ride or die.” Danny snickered. It was literally die, with his Phantom side of things. He held two fists up, and wound them, like Popeye right after eating spinach or something. “And if Batman bothers Phantom, we ride at dawn.”

“Batman doesn’t come out unless it’s dark, though? Or for the Justice League.” Tim grinned. He mentally classified Danny under his “to go to” list. That’s where Bart, Bernard, Cassie, Kon, and Garfield were. If he starts shit, he could count on them to have his back and cause even more shit. Danny, wanting to fistfight Bruce over the man making Phantom uncomfortable? He absolutely is making that list.

“Then we ride at, like, dusk. Or uh, like 10PM. I gotta get my beauty sleep.”

“You’ll definitely need it,” Tim inconspicuously texted the group chat, which quickly blew up.

“Shut up,” Danny playfully shoved Tim. “Wait, can Batman even legally adopt? Isn’t being a vigilante illegal? And how can he adopt someone dead?”

Tim dramatically flailed and splayed over Danny’s carpeted living room. “Dunno about his identity,” he lied to Danny, like a liar. “But Gotham has a bunch of laws for the undead/restored to life people so there’s probably enough gray space there.”

Danny spluttered. “You guys have undead friendly laws?”

“Yeah, geht do you think Grundy just chills out? Plus, we have like a minor resurrection event every few years. It usually doesn’t stick but sometimes it does. Bruce pushed for those laws when Jason came back to life, except he doesn’t actually want people to know he’s like, alive.”

“Jason died?” Danny blinked. Well, that would explain the vibes. “Huh. So what’s up with his rank vibes then?”

“Rank vibes?” Tim pressed record on his phone.

Danny nodded. “Yeah, you know how Phantom’s got like a really chill green vibe?” Inwardly, Danny snickered at his pun. Chill. Yeah, he meant that very literally. “Jason’s got kind of a rank green vibe. He’s kind of stinky? Definitely never introduce him to Phantom.” Danny’s senses got worse in his ghost form.

“Jason regularly showers, though?!”

“Not smell! Like, a spiritual smell?”

“You can smell souls?!” Tim sat up. “Bro, you’re a meta?!”

“Uh.” Danny hesitated. “Yeah. I can smell souls. It’s a thing. Everyone from my town can do it.”

“What?!” Tim paused. “Wait, can Phantom smell souls?”

“Yeah. We’re, uh, from the same town.”

“Danny, what the fuck?”

“Hey, don’t look at me like that, you’re the one with a soul-sick brother! Not to mention, you’re kinda stinky too!”

“Hey!”

“Soul-stinky nerd man!”

——

“I stink?!” Jason spluttered out, extremely offended.

“The Lazarus pits. He’s most likely smelling traces of Lazarus pit on you, you imbecile.”

“We need to speak to Phantom. This instant.”

“I dunno, B. Danny sounded like he was gonna break your face if you bothered Phantom anymore.” Dick snickered.

“Yeah,” Tim chimed in, from his seat in front of the Bat-computer. “He was pretty serious.”

“Are we just gonna glaze over the fact that they’re from the same town?!” Stephanie exclaimed, practicing her moves on a training dummy.

“How does that even work? What does that mean? I thought Phantom was an immortal?” Duke asked.

“We also can’t rule out time-travel.” Barbara slammed her baton into a training dummy, twisting her wheelchair in an agile maneuver that left the dummy on the floor.

“No bothering Phantom.” Cass proclaimed.

“That’s quite right. You all have a warm dinner sitting above your cave and should it remain uneaten, I assure you that sherbet Sunday and crêpe Tuesday shall be canceled.” Alfred stepped in. The Bats, threatened, scrambled to ditch their gear and go upstairs.

#Danny: not another adoption! #Vlad and Bruce trying to adopt Danny even though he’s got parents:🤝 #batman #danny phantom #tim drake #jason todd #bruce wayne #dc x dp #bamf danny phantom #dpxdc #dcxdp #dcxdp crossover #sea cryptic! danny au