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cereal-kileeeeer · 3 years

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?spoilers haikyuu manga ahead?

things in haikyuu that give me goosebumps every. single. damn. time:

the banners in the last chapters.

“Habit is second nature” with Hoshiumi fighting in his territory: air.

“Effort” with Sakusa feeling good in a court where only the sharpest belong.

“Give each play your all”; i mean, by just thinking about Bokuto you can understand the meaning of the banner, he’s just a normal ace afterall.

“Be strong” with Ushiwaka, as Tendou told him «Nobody is interested in watching players who’re just trying really hard. Get! Good! Skill and strength are everything.»

“Who needs memories?” with Miya Atsumu, -which i believe it’s the best summary of playing volleyball- cause, reading about him saying that all he needs are his muscles, at first i thought ‘bruh, you moving your muscles as you want is memory’ but then, what do the banner meant with ‘memories’? As the coach said «What will clinging to a year ago… a week ago, an hour ago get us? Nothing.» i think that, yes, memories are necessary to get to where you actually are, but once you get there, you don’t need’em no more, as in the present you gain/give yourself new goals to reach, have new ambitions you aspire to, with the target to get better every time and ‘to be found by somebody who’s even better’, the simple but not easy cycle of improvement in haikyuu. So for me, everybody need memories as long as they’re not memories but still present.

“Fly”

No, i’m not crying you are. No but really, I’m still moved by this panel and i look at this for five hours each day. Quoting coach Ukai «Don't you dare look down! Volleyball is a sport where you are always looking up!» what really amazes me is the fact Hinata freaking Shoyo, who was just a smol kid who started playing volleyball alone, a sport played by teams, since his first official play against Kitagawa Daiichi always gave each play his all, and his total loss against Kageyama was the memory he needed to want to become strong. He later understood the importance of taking care of his body, as volleyball is not only when he’s on court, putting effort and attention on his health, his diet, his sleep ecc., and the fact that after two years of beach volley he manages to play indoor volleyball like he’s still standing on the sand? No better representation of habit is second nature. After this, after aaaall of this, he didn’t fail where he once failed when he still was in middle school, and succeeds to get through Kageyama’s blocking, just not as a spiker, but as a decoy.

And I think this is fckin awesome.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk.

BONUS

“Connect” with smooth former captain Kuroo Tetsurō

and last but not least actually it gave me more goosebumps than the karasuno one with hinata and kageyama

“Rule the court” with the Great King Oikawa Tōru, closing the row of banners. Like, it couldn’t have ended any better. Rule the court. Make both your allies and enemies dance to your tune. Make them feel your power to intimidate them and give’em a reason to want to outclass you. Rule the court.

I’m convinced that the true protagonist is Oikawa lol

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majicmarker · 3 years

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so i’ve had a lot on my mind lately — the good, the bad, the ugly, you know the drill. i’m used to the bad and the ugly, but i think (and ofc by my therapist’s rec) i need to give a little credit to the good, too. not to mention the good is largely comprised of people, and those people deserve a sports stadium wave, yk? idk shit abt sports, whatever, but i know what the wave is and it’s like the grandest gesture i can think of, SO

listen, y’all. to get real here, i hate fandom. my time spent therein has been hit-or-miss, but the misses got me hard and contributed to some major self-loathing, etc etc. we’re not gonna get into the specifics, i don’t owe that to anyone, but suffice it to say things got Rough.

but so much of it can be so, so good. and rn i want to keep on my rose-colored glasses, and the rosiest parts for me have always been @kitten1618x and @mygutsforgarters

(quite a few others, too, but i no longer have everyone’s info. and some ppl are newer friends, or relationships that have moved more slowly. i have mad love for u guys too, obvs, but ik melissa and gus irl so we know each other More and they’re who this post is rly about atm. pls know i don’t want to harsh on anyone’s feelings)

the tl;dr version of events is i met them both via fanfic. i happened upon theirs like “bitch!!!! **i** wanna do this, they’re bomb as hell” and then i made them be friends w me. they’ll tell you they wanted to be friends w me first, but that’s not important bc **i** am the one making this post, so they can both like,, suck it.

ANYWAY.

@ melissa : so bitch listen. here’s the thing abt melissa…… i found her while browsing jonsa fic back when i cared abt GOT, and she brought me back to what i loved so much abt romance when i first started, way back in junior high, what’s up. i bad a fascination w historial romantic epics for a loooooong time — those formative yrs, amirite ladies??? — but girl i could never write it so well as melissa. immediately she struck this balance between the drama you expect from historicals and the levity of a good romance, and i was just like, “hand to god this woman must be published already, surely???”

(she’s not, but that’s ridiculous so we’re gonna skip that)

(also she’s busy?? we’ve been friends for like six years and i will never know how many kids she actually has, but the point is she’s a goddamn superhero and i’m obsessed w her, MOVING ON)

i just Had to be her friend for two reasons: 1) she’s too talented, and b) i have said that abt 2 ppl my entire life and she was the first, so i was like, “AH YES MY HOLY GRAIL”

so ofc i slid into her DMs just as effectively as that one guy i had a crush on when i was sixteen and he’s still shooting me texts every valentine’s day bc of the societal pressures i guess (it is Far Less Effective these days, he’s my age and therefore too young for me, gross, but i digress), except me and melissa go way stronger.

she reminded me of why, half a lifetime ago, i started writing romance — bc it’s fun, bc i want to. bc i can do absolutely anything i want, bc who else is gonna read it but me and whoever i share it with? it was all up to me what i wanted to do with it, and i could do anything. nothing really mattered but what i wanted, and i hadn’t felt that way abt anything in such a long time — let alone abt something i used to love so much.

melissa’s writing is so beautiful, it’s everything i wanted to achieve when i was fifteen and never got around to perfecting. and i’m totally okay w that now, bc what do i need to do myself that she’s not already doing/wants to do in the future? when i found melissa’s writing i found a missing part of me — a part i’d maybe lost, maybe i gave it up, idk, but it was totally gone until i found her fics and they fucking clicked. i had to reach out bc there was a part of me that was a part of her, and she helped me find that again w/o even knowing it.

so i found melissa via GOT, and from the start she’d been trying to get me to write some bethyl. years and years, she dropped not-so-subtle hints — and by “hints,” i mean legit directives that i watch just enough TWD to write her some beth/daryl fic. real crafty, she is.

eventually the stars aligned: i was bored w the same dynamics i’d been writing for years, i wanted smthn new, i was restless, i was line editing a bethyl fic she’d written, and — again — this shit clicked. her fic made me want to explore this dynamic i’d never done before, so i watched the prerequisite episodes (no more than that tho, i super hate the show and i’m begging y’all to not @ me abt it anymore). i found smthn that i’d been missing, smthn that challenged and excited me and brought me back around to why i love romance and, more importantly, why i want to write it myself.

so as i was starting to write bethyl, i was poking around the ao3 tag to get a feel for what had been done, what hadn’t, anything i might be missing. and goddamn BAM —

@ gus : this is where u enter dramatically thru a red velvet curtain that i don’t wanna touch (Metaphorically bc you do romance better than me and i’m cool w that bc your talent simply Cannot be touched, and Literally bc i hate velvet) — i was like, “please for the love of god let her want to write contemporary romance, i need some good fckin food”

i happened upon “doo wah diddy diddy” first. ofc the summary hooked me, forget my usual hard no against pregnancy fics (i have issues w pregnancy and that’s all anybody Needs to know, back off), but This Bitch !!!!!!! has a way with words and i wanted to be friends w her straightaway. lmao too bad for her, now she’s stuck w me

gus’s fics gave me what i wanted without having to write it myself. her style is so distinctive, she hits the notes between porn and Actual Affection that is missing from uhhhh, every romance i’ve tried?? (why is everyone so intent on the sex part?? fckin chill. at best it’s unrelatable and at worst u sound like u’d rather wear someone than fuck them, check urself)

she writes w such care, she wants you to know what she’s doing here, and what she’s doing here is combining the physical and emotional needs of both characters w/o infringing on anyone’s comfortability. you root for these characters bc they simply want to be together, no strings (and if there are strings, damn, they talk abt it).

gus makes you believe in love in the modern age. like, not to sound like one of those ppl who post fckin “no one in this generation knows how to love!!!1!!11!!” memes on facebook, those are dumb, but gus’s writing made me think “yeah man, love ain’t dead, it’s just abt how we approach it.”

(if y’all haven’t guessed yet, i have some hang-ups abt relationships. i’ve goddamn earned those. but melissa and gus both brought me back to where i needed to be — in this place where, yeah, we’ve got some shit to deal with, but we all still deserve the things we want, and those things are achievable. i could not have gotten here without them, so jot that down.)

gus is Real, she’s funny, she’s unapologetic in the way she writes. ofc she has her personal hurdles, but who doesn’t?? and tbh nobody writes a sex scene like gus does. physical, realistic, but balanced w the emotional depth that makes you root for these characters bc you can Feel how much they want each other — not just sexually, but in the less-erotic aftermath of that passion. it continues to blow my mind, bc i’ve never seen anyone do what she does. i can’t even pinpoint the specifics, bc she just… Does It. and you’re reading it like “yeah bitch that’s it,” and That’s It.

it’s fckin wild.

these two — my best friends, the lights of my life, both of whom always make me crave chicken tenders at THE most inconvenient hours bc somehow we always talk abt chicken or ice cream or ultimately DQ, but they're both so hot idec — have something special.

i really, really want them both to know that: it’s not just in how they’ve treated me as a friend, but who they are as people, in their creative pursuits. i’ve never known support the way they’ve shown me; i’ve never known this much enthusiasm or investment or belief that i can do what i want with my talent. i want them to know that i feel the same way abt them and their works.

sometimes, when i look back at their writing that completely kicked my ass, i still can’t believe that they’ve become two of my best friends. it’s totally bonkers. they’re This Talented, and they wanna be friends w my spastic ass? GIRL. i’m out.

i’m not always the best at being present, at giving people what they need when they need it. but with everything that melissa and gus have given me in the past few years, i need them to know this — honey!!! i need all y’all to know this, bc i know fandom shit is hard, but you should know some of these friendships are so, so worth all that bullshit, so —

they have so much to give, so much to say, so much to offer. i could not have kept going without them. i couldn’t believe in myself without the faith they’ve given to me. i hope that i can always give that same faith right back.

and that, babes, is what real soulmates are all about.

#i just love them whoops my hand slipped #the majnificent adventures #gus tag #@ melissa wtf is our tag we had like five #how do i not remember five things #anyway i got into my feelings tnt don’t @ me

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maerrybom · 4 years

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What kind of friend are they? - Vine Edition (OC HC ft. DR NPCS)

i felt like doing this because I’m bored so here we gooo

found in masterlist

maye - the ‘i don’t need friends they disappoint me’ friend:

“you need friends ?? for what?”

maye bby, pls give attention to your friends

she’s usually forced to hang out w/ the group and socialise (thanks to Lumi), so she’s a grumpy bean

her social skills are -393493 rating so she stands there and judges everything quietly

nono also forces her to join in with shopping and maye can’t say no when there’s a gun being pointed at her back

also gets forced into wearing clothes that nono picks for her

“that dress looks so good on your figure. do you like it??” “...i want to sleep.”

sleep > friends

one time finger teased maye for her ‘bland personality’

“...so that’s what’s wrong with me?” cue finger panicking and feeling hella guilty

so finger ‘baked’ her sugar cookies the next day to apologise but maye just shrugs because it wasn’t that bad nor does she remember what happened

“i don’t care” (she accepts them anyways)

actually cares for her friends, but won’t show it

“I care about you, don’t you feel the same?” “who knows”

but hurt her friends?? her new family ?? don’t even try unless you’d like a gun shoved up your as—

ahem,, just be wary

sol - the ‘mothertrucker dude, that hurt like a buttcheek on a stick’ friend:

she’s supportive !! loyal !! caring !!

but she’s a clumsy tol baby,,,,

trips and smashes her head against things often

finger joked about wrapping her in bubble wrap once to everyone and after realising how often she gets hurt, they’re considering the idea

when she stress cooks, she always cuts her fingers when using a knife or burns her fingers from the stove by accident

but she doesn’t pay attention because stress > own well being

pls give her bandages and emotional support

but my gOOdness, her food is heaven on a plATE

lumi and finger call her their ‘jesus mom’

she’s embarrassed but she’s v v happy when they eat her food

until the idiots decide to have a competition to see how much of her food they can eat

stress cooking = a whole buffet

“guys pls stop, you’re scaring me” “just one more bitE”

she thinks they’re going to die if they eat more, so she starts crying while she’s eating the leftovers so they don’t eat any more of her food

they instantly stop and apologise sm but crybaby sol already reached her mental breaking point so she,, just,, cries harder

this causes both dummies to cry with her

now look at what you’ve done

even from a distance, you can still hear their cries

thalia - the ‘i don’t care if you break your elbow’ friend:

yk that one vine where it went like:

“rggrhwhqAaw” “get your fckin dog bihch!” “it don’t bite” “yes it dO!”

that sums up her personality,,

stare at her for more than a sec and she’ll fight you

johann tries to stop her

keyword: tries

but if things do start getting a lil bloody, he’ll simply grab her by the waist, lifts her like an infant and walk away while she’s cursing at him and whoever she was fighting with

✨ 𝓅𝓇𝑜𝒻𝑒𝓈𝓈𝒾𝑜𝓃𝒶𝓁 𝑒𝓎𝑒𝓇𝑜𝓁𝓁𝑒𝓇 ✨

rejects offers to hangout most of the time to train, but accepts nono’s offers no matter what

thalia actually respects and admires her a lot (what a simp)

takes every chance she gets to step on finger’s toes

‘that’s what he gets for being so tall, how dare he’

if anyone tries to ask her for advice, um why??

do you want to get hurt?? do you?

she’s brutally honest for her own good and will not put up with anyone’s bs

one time she called caesar’s hair ‘piss blonde’ and he was emo for 5 months...and counting

but tbh she can be a decent friend, but she chooses no to #there’snohope

elena - the ‘i spilled lipstick in your valentino bag’ friend:

oh, she asked to borrow your notes because she fell asleep in your alchemy class? well say goodbye because she already lost them

nobody should be getting into this much trouble in just a month

unless you’re elena,,,

lowkey needs to be tied to a pole or else she’ll cause chaos

“don’t touch that—” *breaks* “oh, I did an oopsie”

zero was ordered to watch over the girl by anjou and elena was not happy

so she tried to annoy the ice queen constantly, but zero wouldn’t budge

“go away!! you’re annoying!” “no” “listen to me and shoo!” “no”

so she gave up

she always drags lumi in her mess (much to his dismay)

“where are we going?? what did you do this time??” “I dunno, I just wanted to hang out~”

then there’s 50 adams bots chasing after the duo and they’re both screaming for their life

so lumi feels like his life span shortens every second he’s with the girl

when she saw ruri kazama for the first time, she was just ???

“you’re really pretty, but not as pretty as me!” cue johann’s disappointed expression

ngl johann thinks elena is a toned down version of caesar but he can actually tolerate her presence sometimes

just sometimes,,

but we appreciate the confidence she has??

#dragon raja headcanon #dragon raja writing #dragon raja oc #dragon raja #dragon raja nono #dragon raja johann chu #dragon raja caesar #dragon raja luminous #dragon raja finger #dragon raja zero #dragon raja ruri kazama #maye #sol #thalia #elena

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cantsaythetword · 4 years

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Hey, You Ok?

~A/N - Before we start, lemme just give y’all a Trigger Warning for the following content:

TW FOR INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS, SU*C*DE, AND GENERAL BAD TIMES

I’m gonna put the *Keep Reading* bit here so those who are sensitive to those topics can just scroll past peacefully, hope y’all have a good day :)

Rest of you Ok to continue? Cool. (You have been warned tho, things are about to get DEEP and SAD and BAD. I’m kinda venting through this fic lol so PREPARE YOURSELVES!)

So I had a bad night the other night with some fUn iNtRuSiVe tHoUgHtS (I didn’t know that that’s what that was at the time but my psychologist thinks that’s what it was so yes intrusive thoughts) and I decided to let all my badness out through A FIC!

As a note, I was with other people (aka DA BOYZ (TM)) who asked if I was ok in the middle of the night (multiple times) BUT I DID THE BAD THINGS AND DIDN’T TELL THEM THE TRUTH so it was out of their power to help me. I appreciate them a lot and regret not telling them cause I don’t think it would have ended up as badly as it did (as they are 10/10 good amigos and I love them with every fibre of my being. if you guys (@ Da Boyz (TM)) are reading this I love you sm. And this isn’t a thing saying that I wish you had done something else, you guys gave me so many opportunities to just say I wasn’t great, and even after I repeatedly told you I was, you still gave me hugs and said I wasn’t a burden and that I could always talk to you guys. I don’t deserve such fckin awesome mates, and you guys deserve a better friend than me. HOWEVER enough angsty/sappy messages from me to my closest amigos lol, let’s pause that tangent.)

So yeah that’s fun, and this fic is what I WISH had happened (and may have happened if only I had TOLD MY FRIENDS I WASN’T OK! Dumbass past Leon).

But yeah, a little angsty (very angsty actually, you have been warned) Sanders Sides tword fic (but it gets better in the end) which may have a (slightly cheerier) sequel planned.

- Enoy! ~

* Masterpost Link *

It hit him like a brick wall. A thought filling his mind with fear, loneliness, hopelessness.

They don’t care about you.

Virgil’s teeth clenched as the thought filled his mind. The darkness of the bedroom surrounding him certainly wasn’t helping, and the sleeping bodies around him offered no safety from the attack.

His head snarled again, seemingly out of nowhere. If you were gone they’d be fine. Better off, even.

He looked up at the two sides cuddled next to him, feeling the third pressed against his back. He was surrounded by his friends, his family, but they offered no refuge.

You should just disappear. Nobody would bat an eyelid. They’d be over it in a few months. They’d forget all about you.

“Stop it.” He thought, and squeezed his hand tighter around his friends arm, the other clenching the pillow he was lying on. “Stop it!”

He felt the thought laugh at him, mocking his pitiful plea. The form next to him stirred, but he could barely notice from the deafening chuckle.

You’re unlovable.

“You alright Virge?” A voice mumbled, breaking the silence. A hand gently ran its fingers through his hair.

Virgil nodded, lying.

“Was that a yes nod or a no nod?” It clarified. and Virgil hoped it didn’t doubt his falsehood.

“A yes.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.” his voice cracked, and he tensed, hoping that Roman both had and hadn’t noticed.

Unfortunately and fortunately, he hadn’t. And he was plunged into abandonment again.

Even your parents would be fine. They don’t need you. They’d probably be glad their mess of a son is gone. The voice continued.

A few tears dribbled out of his scrunched eyes, his nose was streaming and he could feel his heart thudding further and further out of his chest.

Just do it. Walk out of the house and do it.

He began shaking, wishing he could scream, shout, anything. But his fear of waking his sleeping friends stopped him from doing so.

Nobody loves you. They wish you weren’t here. They only invited you to this sleepover cause you heard them talking about it.

“Please.” He sobbed silently to himself. “I just want to sleep.”

You know that’s not what you really want. You wish you never existed. You-

Something thudded against the floor, breaking him out of his spiralling descent.

“I’m fine!” Patton said groggily, making his way back up onto the bed. The noise, it seemed, had awoken everyone, as Roman slipped his arm out from under Logan and swung his feet off the bed.

“I knew there wasn’t enough room on this bed for the four of us.” He chuckled sleepily, contrasting to the ambience Virgil’s mind had created for him. “I’m moving to the couch.”

Virgil was frozen, replaying the thoughts again and again. Before he was sucked into his own ravine of depression, he stood up and went after Roman.

The creative side was shaking out his blanket for the night, pillows already neatly positioned at the armrest on the sofa, when Virgil emerged from the hallway.

“I can take the couch if you want.” He offered before even thinking about what he was saying.

And before he could rephrase, Roman nodded.

“Sweet! Thanks Virge. See you in the morning!” He laughed, before (humorously) scurrying back into the Queen size bed with the other two sides.

And Virgil was left alone in his head once more.

Why did he do this? Now he was even more alone than he was next to the other sides. All the safety from before (as little as it was) was gone. He was the darkness’s plaything.

The familiar voice seeped into his mind once more, and he was drowning again.

You wish you were never born. You wish you could just fade from this world and into the abyss. Why are you still here, putting off the inevitable. Just die.

The worst part of the voice? Nothing it was saying was wrong. Even though he was the most introverted person on the planet, lock down had spiralled his mental health to the point of breakdown. He just wanted it all to end.

You should just end it all. Everyone will be much happier. You’ll be much happier, not that you deserve it. Just die. Just die. Just-

As the light from the phone torch filled the living room, Virgil violently tugged the blankets over his head. Nobody could see him in this state, they’d hate him even more than they obviously already did.

“Sorry, forgot my pillows.” Roman whispered, a laugh tinting his voice.

Virgil tensed as he came closer, hoping he wouldn’t pull back the covers and see his tear stained cheeks, or red puffy eyes.

“I think you’re lying on top of them.” He pulled Virgil’s shoulder up, body passing the other man. Virgil took this opportunity to stand up, keeping his face downwards towards the floor.

“There we go, thanks Vir-” Roman turned, pillows in hand, before stopping and dropping everything he was holding.

Virgil said nothing, hoping the silence was nothing to do with him.

“Hey, you Ok?”

Shit.

Virgil nodded, not wanting to speak in case his cracking, desperate, pitiful voice gave him away.

“No you’re not, come on.” Roman pushed further, his face morphing into a concerned expression.

“I’m fine, really.” His voice shook uncontrollably with every word, and he looked up at Roman with watery eyes for the first time that night.

“Please, Virge, talk to me. I’m here for you. We’re all here for you.”

There was a moment of tense silence, as Virgil tossed between telling Roman and not telling him. Part of him just wanted to be alone. To let the bad thoughts consume him and just wait out the storm until the next day. But the other part of him wanted to let his friend in. To confide in Roman, to just let everything spill out in a meaningful embrace.

Finally, he decided.

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Virgil whispered desperately, his bottom lip quivering.

Roman gave a sympathetic sigh and pulled the stiff man into a hug.

Virgil, unknowing of what overcame him in the moment, collapsed into his friend’s arms, allowing fresh tears to cascade down his cheeks as he silently cried.

“Hey, hey, shh, it’s ok.” Roman calmingly rubbed his friend’s back, slightly taken aback by his friend’s sudden change in behaviour. “You’re gonna be ok.”

The pair slowly manoeuvred onto the sofa, and let the darkness engulf them. Their hands intertwined, their shoulders touching, their breathing matching in a steady rhythm.

Minutes passed, the silence occasionally broken by a shaky breath or sniffle from Virgil. But those silent minutes were no longer filled with dark thoughts or terrifying images. In the arms of his friend, he was finally able to clear his mind of the demons which struck moments before. Relief washed over him in waves of bliss as he truly acknowledged he wasn’t fighting alone. He wasn’t suffering alone.

Finally, Virgil spoke.

“I’m sorry.”

Roman pulled away, and took the man by the arms. “What do you mean you’re sorry?” He continued without letting Virgil answer. “You think you’re a burden? Right? Is that it?”

Virgil nodded, pushing his head into Roman’s chest.

The creative side wrapped his arms around the quivering man. “You’re not. You’re truly not. And I know you don’t believe it, but listen to me.”

Virgil nodded.

“We love you, and we care about you. And you can always come to us if you need us, ok?”

He nodded again.

“You are not a burden on us, Virgil.” Roman continued, as Virgil felt something drip down his cheek again. “Just as you don’t feel that we’re a burden on you, right?”

Amidst his quiet tears, Virgil agreed.

“Please, promise me you’ll come to us next time. We might not be able to help, but at least you won’t be alone.”

The two men sat for a while longer, letting Virgil’s sobbing cease. His breathing became more stable, and he could feel his eyelids grow heavy.

“Let’s lie down, huh?” Roman suggested, moving them both to a move comfortable position.

They shifted down on the cushions until they were comfortably flat, with Virgil’s temple resting just below Roman’s shoulder. Virgil was on his side, one arm tucked under his ribs, the other wrapped around Roman’s torso. For the first time since the four of them had gone to bed, he felt safe.

Subconsciously, Roman began tracing shapes on Virgil’s back. He only realised he was doing this when the anxious side noticeably relaxed into his embrace. Soft, almost silent giggles came out of the half-asleep side. Smiling to himself, Roman continued.

The slightly tickly sensations rippling across his back distracted his mind just enough to keep the voice out. Just enough so his brain couldn’t trick him into thinking he was annoying or unwanted. And just enough so he could be lulled to the land of nod.

As his eyes slowly began to close, he realised just how lucky he was. How lucky he was to have friends who did care about him. To have friends that loved him. To have friends that, no matter how dark his world became, they’d be there to shine even the smallest light, to make him feel whole again.

#tw: suicide #tw: intrusive thoughts #tw: mental health #fic #mine #kinda angsty for a change #but I'm a kinda angsty boy lately #not a fun time #and I haven't really talked to my friends since #which i both hate and am kinda ok with #cause part of me is like #OH LEON THEY'RE HAPPY TO NOT HAVE YOU AROUND EVEN THO THEY'RE TAGGING YOU IN A HEAP OF MESSAGES #but the other part of me is like #LEON THE FCK YOU DOING MATE YOU KNOW NOT TALKING TO YOUR MATES IS A SIGN YOU'RE REALLY NOT OK PLEASE SAY SOMETHING TO THEM #so yeah those are fun thoughts to watch fight in your head #but ye #hope you guys are having a better time than i am at the moment #idek if anyone reads the tags lolllll #hopefully not cause there's some weird ass sht in here #if you've read all these say Crows are Cool in the commenty thing #see you later amigos #sanders sides #Virgil #Roman

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jimins-crooked-tooth · 6 years

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Ask Game

nobody asked me any of these questions because u all h8 me but I wanted to answer them anyway so here we are (^:

1: Name: Mia (: 2: Age: 19 3: 3 Fears: spiders, people crawling and being chased in horror movies, my dog dying someday 4: 3 things I love: my dog, park jimin, Speezy Freezes 5: 4 turns on: boys listening, empathizing, learning from their ignorance, and advocating for important causes. K I N K. get u a freak like that ^^^ 6: 4 turns off: being talked over, mansplaining, greasy hair, bad smell 7: My best irl friend(s): @jaemamba, @namjoons-broken-toe, @mark-biased 8: Sexual orientation: bisexual 9: My best first date: going to my university’s football field at 1:00 in the morning with my dog, running around with him, and then driving to Speedway to get Speedy Freezes 10: How tall am I: 5′4 11: What do I miss: my best friend 12: What time was I born: i was born at 5:18 on 6/18 13: Favorite color: red 14: Do I have a crush: i fell in love with my eye doctor yesterday. does that count? 15: Favorite quote: “We are what we repeatedly do; excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” 16: Favorite place: this is hard. mt favorite destination type place is antigua, guatemala, but my favorite place to be is anywhere with my dog (: 17: Favorite food: scalloped potatoes 18: Do I use sarcasm: me??? noooo, never. 19: What am I listening to right now: dope - BTS 20: First thing I notice in new person: teeth and hair 21: Shoe size: 7 1/2 US size 22: Eye color: green 23: Hair color: brown 24: Favorite style of clothing: sweaters 25: Ever done a prank call?: when i was in, like, middle school. OH! also american airlines when they were being unhelpful little douche-dicks this summer when they lost my luggage in france ((((: 27: Meaning behind my URL: um i’m in love with jimin’s crooked tooth 28: Favorite movie: monster’s inc. 29: Favorite song: leave me lonely - ariana grande 30: Favorite band: BTS 31: How I feel right now: tired and hungry 32: Someone I love: park jimin 33: My current relationship status: i’m in an exclusive relationship with food 34: My relationship with my parents: eh 35: Favorite holiday: christmas and thanksgiving 36: Tattoos and piercing i have: i have a tattoo of mine and my brother’s hands in a pinky swear on my right side, a tattoo that says “i belong deeply to myself” on my left side, a big tattoo of athena on my left thigh, and my dog’s paw print on my right foot. i have my ears double pierced and my nose pierced. 37: Tattoos and piercing i want: i’d love to have nipple piercings but my boobs are reeeeally big and that increases my risk of infection and irritation, so i probably wont get it done. and the next tattoo i want is a bow behind my ear 38: The reason I joined Tumblr: fandoms 39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?: i don’t think so, we just don’t talk 40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?: lololololololol no 41: Have I ever kissed the last person I texted? i would hope not 42: When did I last hold hands?: like a week ago with my best friend 43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?: it depends on if i put on makeup or not. no makeup = 15-20 minutes, makeup = 30-40 minutes 44: Have you shaved your legs in the past three days?: i think so. i’m losing track of time so it’s hard for me to remember hahahaha. 45: Where am I right now?: at my apartment. 46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?: i don’t drink so quite honestly, i don’t know who it would be helping me 47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?: loud 48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?: no 49: Am I excited for anything?: i’m excited for to make a new character for d&d 50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?: yes(: my best friend Martin, but he lives thousands of miles away in normandy, france 51: How often do I wear a fake smile?: more often than you’d think. i’m very good at it. 52: When was the last time I hugged someone?: two days ago i hugged some family members after visiting 53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?: i would not care in the slightest lol 54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?: i don’t think so. i usually keep trustworthy people close to me and untrustworthy people away from me. 55: What is something I disliked about today?: i accidentally slept in waaaaaaaay too late. 56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?: park jimin 57: What do I think about most?: my dog 58: What’s my strangest talent?: i have a few. i memorize license plates, i can name every color in a 64 pack of crayola crayons, and i can look good in any pair of sunglasses 59: Do I have any strange phobias?: yes. people crawling and being chased in horror movies. also, people touching and grabbing my wrists/being restrained 60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?: in front of it. 61: What was the last lie I told?: “my dog locked the door, not me.” 62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?: i’m just gonna say facetimeing because it’s kind of a mix of the two 63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?: yes and yes 64: Do I believe in magic?: no 65: Do I believe in luck?: yes 66: What's the weather like right now?: snowy snowy snowy 67: What was the last book I've read?: everything, everything 68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?: yes 69: Do I have any nicknames?: mi and higgie smalls 70: What was the worst injury I've ever had?: when i broke my arm in 7th grade. i was playing soccer and i was the goal keeper and somebody from the opposite team kicked the ball and snapped my arm in half. 71: Do I spend money or save it?: a mix of both 72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue?: nope 73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me?: yes, a pencil 74: Favorite animal?: giraffe and puffins 75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?: watching mulan 76: What do I think is Satan’s last name?: i asked my roommate and he said “faust” so i’m gonna go with that lol 77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?: serendipity and lie 78: How can you win my heart?: food and dogs 79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?: sneezed on the beat, and the beat got sicka 80: What is my favorite word?: serendipity 81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr: @got7-markjinson, @yeoldalayhehoo 82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?: “fuck donald trump” 83: Do I have any relatives in jail?: not that i know of 84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? teleportation so i could go anywhere in the world for free! 85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? “are you happy?” 86: What is my current desktop picture? sehun lookin’ all perfect, as always (’: 87: Had sex? no 88: Bought condoms? no 89: Gotten pregnant? no 90: Failed a class? no 91: Kissed a boy? yes 92: Kissed a girl? no)))): 93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? no omg too cheesy 94: Had a job? i’ve had 4 95: Left the house without my wallet? yes 96: Bullied someone on the internet? i more-so fight with people on the internet, not bully. 97: Had sex in public? never had sex, so obviously not hahaha 98: Played on a sports team? yes! growing up, i played soccer for 7 years 99: Smoked weed? nope 100: Did drugs? nope 101: Smoked cigarettes? nope 102: Drank alcohol? i hate alcohol 103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? no 104: Been overweight? yep 105: Been underweight? nope 106: Been to a wedding? yes 107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA 5 hours? i think you mean 5 TIMES 5 hours lmaoooo 108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? YES. WHO HASN’T???? 109: Been outside my home country? yes! 3 times(: i’ve been to guatemala, mexico, and frace 110: Gotten my heart broken? eh, not really 111: Been to a professional sports game? yes 112: Broken a bone? yes! 2 113: Cut myself? no 114: Been to prom? yes, twice 115: Been in airplane? yes, soooo many times 116: Fly by helicopter? no, but i would love to do it sometime! 117: What concerts have I been to? omg there are so many. in order: taylor swift, kelly clarkson, one direction, demi lovato, bastille, lana del rey, marina and the diamonds, one direction (again), ed sheeran, the 1975, ariana grande, and then i’m going to see harry styles and niall horan this summer! 118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? yes because i’m fckin GAY 119: Learned another language? i’m studying spanish and korean 120: Wore make up? all the time lol 121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? NO BECAUSE I HAVE NEVER HAD SEX. WHY ARE THERE SO MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT SEX 122: Had oral sex? NO 123: Dyed my hair? nope 124: Voted in a presidential election? yes, just 1 125: Rode in an ambulance? no 126: Had a surgery? yes 127: Met someone famous? yes, i met lea delaria fro oitnb 128: Stalked someone on a social network? UM ALWAYS??? 129: Peed outside? yep 130: Been fishing? yep but it’s soooo borning 131: Helped with charity? yes 132: Been rejected by a crush? all the fucking time (^: 133: Broken a mirror? i dont think so 134: What do I want for birthday? for park jimin to acknowledge my existence ((((((((((((((((((((((((:

why am i such a noob????

#I Hate Myself #welp #there's just about everything you need to know about me hahahaha

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jakganim · 7 years

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if you could assign your mutuals/non mutuals with fanfic AUs what would they be (ex soulmate au, flowershop au, etc)

i see this ask floating around now haha hello anon and thank you for this, i didn’t want to answer it on mobile bcos the app has a history of crashing after i write a long post so now that i’m on a laptop i can finally do the thing. also prepare yourself for a long answer bcos i like these kinds of asks they make me think but also that means i end up talking too much so rly idk maybe you played yoself lmaoo

here we go

@astrofireworks - i was gonna say coffee shop!au but as i was explaining it, it sounded almost soulmate-y so maybe i’ll mix the two. it’s the kind where you run into someone who has been in your vicinity for a long time but you just didn’t know it. the one where the world has been waiting for the two of you to find a reason to meet. it’s been set, it was gonna happen, but nobody knew when, not even the world. and in a way, you both kind of have to work at it, but when you meet finally, it all makes sense.

@artist-aroha - college frat!au where kat kate likes to act like an obnoxious bro and comes off kinda fuckboi-esque in that annoyingly attractive way but nah she’s just a chill lil smol bean and everybody wants to fight her but rly they just love her and want to protect her bcos she would totally do the same like

bro i would chug all ten beers n run naked around campus for u bro

bro

@binnieheart bakery!au where jane is running the place and she looks kinda uninterested and stoic all the time but you start working for her and you’re like wtf she’s a teddy bear??? that bakes rly pretty cakes??? what was i thinking she owns a bakery of course she’s soft :))) and she doesn’t say anything but she bakes you extra pastries on the side for you to bring home and let’s you try all her new creations before they’re even ready bcos she likes you and she doesn’t even have to say it you already know.

@shiningstar-sanha library!au where you see chaewon at the library like every week in the same section just picking out random books and reading the lil blurbs and then putting them back in until she finds one she likes. and she always finishes them in a week and gets a new one. and one day you find her in a completely different section looking lost so you recommend a book. and next week she recommends a book in return. and then it’s back and forth until you both literally recommend the same fckin book and ur like ok this is ridiculous why aren’t we friends??? friendship obviously ensues.

@vonseal historical!au where seal is a literal princess in line for the throne and her subjects love her to fucking death and would do anything for her. princes n princesses be tripping over their feet to have her hand in marriage by trying to impress her n shit. so everyone’s like ok we need to have a competition fair n square and they’re like doing the archery portion of the competition but seal just laughs, gets out of her seat, picks up a bow an arrow, and hits bullseye. sorry guys but i can handle myself thanks i ain’t no prize to be won but it was funny watching you guys, bYE. n then she rides off into the sunset on her stallion with a path of glitter flowing behind her (except not cos glitter doesn’t rly exist yet).

@puppycat-eyes fantasy!au where dasha is a fairy but she’s like too big for a fairy and everyone is just like ??? and so she’s like :((( but then elf!carter comes along and is like woWIEWOWOW WHO DIS BE and dasha’s like ??? and carter’s like wow ur so cool n great n cute and dasha’s like !!! no you are?!?! and they live happily ever fucking after and all the haters perish bcos they can’t handle the love.

@starbins next door neighbor!au where you have been living next to kin for like a year now and y’all don’t really speak much because she’s kinda shy and you’re kinda just like whatever about your neighbors in general bcos you grew up fairly reserved and don’t care to make good relationships with all your neighbors but then one day you run into her after coming back from the grocery store and you both happen to be going inside at the same time n y’all kinda just smile at each other but out loud to urself ur like fuCK i forgot to buy sugar guess i gotta go back now and so you go inside and put your stuff down and you’re about to head out again but you open the door and there’s a small container of sugar on the ground and a sticky note with a smiley face on in it and ur like ??? what did i do to deserve ??? :’)

@jinwoostro a sort of domestic canon divergence, where the only thing you’d want to change is the physical distance between you two. so everything’s the same but y’all move closer together and get to see each other whenever you want and hangout and do actual stuff together like try the new restaurant down the block or talk each other out of buying things you don’t need cos you’re both broke af, and help each other set up fairy lights around the bedroom bcos y’all just moved and are trying to take this opportunity to make your homes look aesthetic af. bcos the simple things in life are the most joyous, and just being together is enough.

#anon #asks #wowie this got long #i have class soon i could've been studying but :))))#jordan writes #jordan rambLES

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alyssasmuses-blog · 7 years

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5 and 9 please!

05: Do your IRL friends/family know about your RPing?

Lmao I literally will like sit with my mom & tell her about my plots and characters and stuff and she knows about all my rp partners and she asks me questions about it all. The rest of my fam knows about it and knows about it all too but they don’t c are as much but u kno.

And then like....one time i was talking to an rp partner and they were talking about how they were texting their friend Sara and then I looked over at my friend Sara who was sitting n e x t to me and had just told me she was texting someone by the sAME NAME a few seconds before that and plot twist my friend Sara rp’d with my rp partner.

And like all my friends were there So they all know and nobody cares again.

09: Which writer(s) inspire you?

yikes i don’t.......get inspired by writing so much as i do imagery. Soz I’m so lame. But. Like. I get real inspired by my writing partners??? Because when they write good things it makes me want to write good things bc i wanna l i v e up to greatness (whether or not i dO is another story [i dont])

but i mean my endless praise for @erasershouta is ongoing bc i was literally considering quitting rping entirely until she dragged me into all these fckin fandoms and i read some of her stuff & talked plots and blah blah blah &&I only started rping Mic who was my first bnha muse bc i was like wow i wanna ship w/ stella i miss do ing that so basically i have stella to thank for a l ot & yeah so like she inspired me to do A Lot w/ this blog that otherwise would’a died w/o her.

#askdetectivenao

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flcshbanginarchive-blog · 7 years

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five times kissed (fckin fight me becky)

kissed | i cannot recall the last time someone called me becky, what the fuck, you wanna take this outside??

n )

japan is pretty. prettier than the desert, that’s for damn sure — although he has a vague feeling that thinking just because it’s nicer, the air feels lighter and smells better, and because not everything screams at you that it wants to murder you dead doesn’t mean it doesn’t actually want to do just that. in fact, he doesn’t trust it — doesn’t trust pretty things in general. they usual come with a bite. hidden teeth hurt no less just ‘cause they’re hidden — maybe more so, even, because you never see it coming until it’s too late and you got fangs in your throat dripping venom.

hanamura, with it’s color everywhere, looking soft as a fucking cloud, is too pretty.

he tells reyes, on the first evening. surprisingly, the man does consider it, and tell him he got an important lesson down that a lot of people never want to understand. he just has to stick with it.

don’t trust pretty things.

some things just wash your rules away. or some people.

s )

a mission of such consequences takes time. he did expect as much. he did not expect days to stretch into weeks. the sickening sweet beauty of hanamura settles in on him. it clings to his clothes, his hair, his skin. it forces it’s way down his throat and sits in his blood.

back when he was a kid, lightening storms (or any kind, those just being the most spectacular, powerful, like a godlike creature emerging from the heavens to make sure it was not forgotten, would not be underestimated) would often roam over new mexico. you could taste it in the air. some electric spark, something that words fail to describe but that would invoke a certain kind of excitement of what’s to come deep in his bones.

he feels the same thing, here. it could be the mission, of course, but he never feels that way about a mission. (the last time something like this would wake, deep down buried in his chest, was as blackwatch annihilated deadlock. there was no other word for it. terrifying beautiful — as it’s the only kind of beauty he does understand.)

a feeling that twists, turned into something different that he cannot name, the day he meets the shimadas.

(if he had ever stood eye to eye with a wild animal, elegance all ready to tear his throat out, he’d know the feeling.)

i )

trust is an interesting concept. it’s not that he ever actively thinks about it, but it does dictate so many things, or so it feels. one degree or another, some more important, some barely notable. but it’s there, always.

don’t trust pretty things. a concept his life might well rely on. it’s forgotten, abandoned now. the longer he stays, the more it lures him in. it’s not spring growing into summer. it’s not the way this place becomes familiar, offers itself up as a new home, at least for the time being.

reyes leaves him free reign over his own time, mostly. he’s still almost a kid, and nobody suspects a kid. or maybe they do, but less so than they would another. so he moves, freely. learns. admits to memory. the places, as much as the people.

or the way an archer takes aim, precise deadliness in every move. not just with a bow. it’s how he kills with words, gestures. how every move, every step, every word, every breath seems to be calculated, and ready in invoke havoc. destroy, ultimately, everything in it’s path if he wills.

it’s the most beautiful thing jesse has ever seen in his life. it scares him. but more than it scares him, it excites him.

(always reckless. always fascinated by the flame that might well consume him.)

he wonders if hanzo would love the same way. taking, taking, until there’s nothing left to give, and then, maybe — maybe giving you just enough back to survive.

(reckless. another word for: dumb behavior that will get you killed, sooner or later. rather sooner.)

it’s the last evening before everything will come down, one way or another. somehow, the thought makes something in his chest ache. it’s a terrifying feeling, one that he pushes down along any other he might feel.

when he moves, it’s with a grin that hides all of them. presses a quick kiss to the other’s cheekbone (first time he ever dared to come this close), saying it’s for good luck, and then he leaves before a reaction can be received.

his heart aches, but he doesn’t lose one word about it. it never stops, during the years it takes until he sees him again.

ii )

don’t trust the pretty things. they will tear apart anything in their wake.

when they brought genji in, it was hard to believe what happened. or rather, it wasn’t — it was not hard at all. he could picture the scene just perfectly, illuminated in the light of a storm. it was that he did not want to believe. he did not want to think about it. did not want to imagine, and yet, it seemed as he was unable not to.

(stick to your lessons.)

if he did, maybe his guts wouldn’t feel like someone poured liquid fire inside his body, fire that could never fade. it turns and twists the yearning he carries so, so well hidden beneath his skin. it turns it into something different, a beast with no name. he’d love to say it’s an ugly one. that it would be something simple, like hatred, or just anger. it’s not. it’s majestic and it tears it’s fangs deep into his heart, rips on it and pierces damage that might — would — never fully heal again.

it made itself a home inside him. carries out along his aim, travels with his bullets. sits in the way he holds himself. it’s an elegant beast, but imperfect. it tries to copy. it tries to gain his favor. he does everything he can to drown it.

by the time they run into each other again — or rather, by the time he is, unprepared, forced to meet up against the force of nature who’s involuntary spawn made him and broke him and remade him — it has become so big a part of himself he barely remembers ever being without it.

there is anger. there is hatred. the beast overshadows them. it hungers.

he fights it. maybe he wants to be bitter. wants to be spiteful. wants to not forgive — not to forget. even if genji could let the man back into his life, he does not want to. if he does, he means handing his own fragile heart over, one that never stopped bleeding. it means, falling back into the same mistake.

don’t trust pretty things.

he’s weak. eventually, he gives in. he finds smiles given back when he does not want to, he finds harmless flirtatious comments given out, he finds a need to be close. it makes him want to tear his own skin off.

precision. move for the kill. did the archer plan for it? maybe. maybe not. maybe he’s just as pathetic as he feels. what he is, however, is a fucking coward — unable to face whatever it is that lives inside him. runs from it, and towards the one thing, the one man he wants to avoid.

it’s easier when he’s drunk, and when it’s late, and most are already asleep. it’s easier when his fingertips (not metal, never metal) trace the lines of a dragon. a beast. vicious and beautiful at the same time. finally, a name. it’s easier when he trails a single kiss onto ink, and can pretend he’s just slipping into an exhausted void.

coward.

iii )

no matter how hards he fights, there is no denying that in some things, he has to trust. sometimes, it is small things — like he came to trust reinhardt to not break his bones when he gives a friendly clap on the shoulder (one he feels even vibrating all the way through his body and that resonates oddly in the place flesh becomes metal), or lucio not to wreck his hearing beyond repair. some things are harder — trusting that despite all that which has happened, people wanted him here, liked having him around, and if he doubts it, it’s hidden beneath a smirk and a tip of his hat — and some others seem near impossible. it seems near impossible to look ana or jack in the eyes like he used to. before he mourned them.

funnily, just trusting any of them to have his back in battle comes easiest. maybe because he fought his entire life, even when he didn’t carry a gun.

it’s scary how easy trusting hanzo comes back to him. he doesn’t want to. he doesn’t want to admit to it, doesn’t want to follow a path of which the first step will just tear him all the way down. might as well fucking have him take one of his arrows and force his through his chest — that’d hurt less, and would be much quicker. it scares him. scares him more than anything else ever did.

(coward coward coward)

it’s not that he gets a say, though. it feels natural, feels like breathing, and just as much he feels like suffocation, like drowning.

when he gives up, it washes over. except it’s been there the entire time, and the only person he’s been lying to is himself.

he’s drowning. he doesn’t care if he gets anything back when he breathes the archer in, when he practically attacks him with his desperation. when he’s having his hands entangled into the fabric and there’s nothing soft or tender about the way he kisses him. it’s a man dying trying to chase after just another heartbeat.

how hanzo doesn’t end him right there and then is a mystery. maybe he isn’t even worth the effort. maybe —

(don’t trust.)

iv )

they fucked up. he doesn’t know who did (it’s entirely possible it’s been himself, but searching for guilt is for later, when he’s actually having time to spare for such unimportant things), but they fucked up, and when he hears dragons roar, his heart seems to stop and skip both at once. it’s both a good and a bad sign.

nobody should be up there. nobody should be —

he runs. doesn’t care that he would be an easy target himself right now (the thought does not occur, years and years of fighting and survival washed out in fear, and for once, he does not run from, but for). he runs, and he’s never been a religious man, but there’s a prayer on his lips to whoever will listen to him to please, please. not more. he does not get any further, because even thinking about it for the split of a moment — no.

(it’s not that he does not trust hanzo to watch out for himself, but if their hidden sniper had to retreat to the most obvious way of defense he had, it could not mean a good thing.)

there’s blood when he comes to a halt. destruction in their path, not for the first time he sees it, but nevertheless, it’s terrifying.

(beautiful in it’s absolute annihilation.)

there’s blood, and there are bodies. and in between, he finds him. exhausted, bloodied, but fine.

he didn’t know how much the breath in his chest hurt until he releases it, suddenly, and reaches out. caress over skin. unharmed. he could laugh, just from relief, and he does, and he still holds onto him when the laughing gets shut down, swallowed whole and devoured by the other man’s mouth.

with blood sticking to hanzo, and destruction all around him, he finds he’s never seen anything prettier in his life.

v )

he’s never told anyone about some things. like the fact he barely sees color anymore, unless it’s red. sure, he sees it, but it’s faded out. everything seems to stand back while red shines bright, always. it comes with the dull pain that by now has become a constant companion, throbbing behind his eye. one day, his vision might just fully give up on him. you line up a shot, and the moment you pull the trigger — lights out. never talked about how much it scares him, either. and how he does not want to bring it up because, really, what use is a sharpshooter that you can’t use to shoot?

in return, he learns about dragons. it seems dumb, now, to complain about such a petty thing when there was something that could devour you whole the second it decided you no longer worthy. something insatiable.

he does not ask, but he wonders if it feels like your chest burns up, and seems to burst any moment come. he wonders if it feels like it has it’s fangs in your heart, and tears and tears.

the answer is one he fears too much to ask, so instead, he keeps silent for once, and listens. threads his fingers (never metal) through hair like silk while he enjoys the warm that radiates from the body leaned against his own.

sunsets on gibraltar are beautiful. maybe it’s because they turn everything red and allow him to acknowledge all the shades. maybe it’s because the most beautiful sight is the relaxed man next to him.

rules ought to have exceptions.

he seals his lips to the top of the archer’s — his archer’s — head, and keeps still.

#mokutcki #long post #cut for length #HERE IT IS THE LONGEST FUCKING MEME REPLY I EVER FUCKING WROTE #TAKE IT AND DO WITH IT WHAT YOU WILL I'M FUCKING EXHAUSTED FROM WRITING THIS THING #actually i'm super proud of how this turned out #;; SHOOT DARLING. (ask.)#[#[ RE ] ;; SAYS THE COYOTE TO THE DRAGON. (& hanzo.)

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emetkoto · 7 years

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nvm i freed myself of Mizar. anyways. for 1, ToolShipping. 2, Placido. 3, Yuusaku, Aoi, Go, Revolver, Kusanagi [if u wanna]

MY BABY BOYS

001 | send me a ship and I will tell you:

when I started shipping it if I did: The first second Bruno and Yuusei first showed up on screen together it changed my life

my thoughts: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!?!?!?!?!?!(translator`s note: see my toolshipping tag for a legible answer)

What makes me happy about them: EVERYTHING THEYRE SO GOOD AND PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER AND THEY LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH AND WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR ONE ANOTHER AND----

What makes me sad about them: :^)

things done in fanfic that annoys me: When they kill Bruno and just write about Yuusei being sad like.....gimme the boys....together....alive.....thanks

things I look for in fanfic: They`re both alive and happy and going on cute dates ....but lets be honest I don`t read fanfics unless I or a close friend write them so I`ve developed a very....specific taste that can`t really be fulfilled by others lmao

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: None, nobody, nada, zip, Toolshipping is all I`ll accept

My happily ever after for them: Bruno comes back somehow through some fuckery or Z-ONE trying to be a good guy in his last moments or the Crimson Dragon doing its fckin job and saving Bruno and them staying behind in Neo Domino together and being happy husbands who run a repair shop and end up adopting Yuugo and Yuusaku somehow bc no I won`t let that go????

who is the big spoon/little spoon: Bruno is the big, Yuusei is the little

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: Just being together tbh? They don`t really care what they`re doing as long as they`re together.....

My knife husband

002 | Give me a character & I will tell you

How I feel about this character: I love him and would happily let him stab me/step on me

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Paradox and Paradox and did I mention Paradox?? Also Revolver but mostly as a joke

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Placido/Lucciano. I like them as a sort of big brother/little brother duo who fight a lot but really care about each other deep down

My unpopular opinion about this character: He deserved better

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: I wish he`d gotten some more development and screentime in general?? He was so good like give me more

my OTP: PLACIDOX

my cross over ship: Does Placidox count? If not then Revcido

a headcanon fact: He`s very short but nobody has ever seen him out of heels so nobody knows....

Some Hacker Kids

003 | send me 5 characters and I will rank them in order of preference

Aoi (altho more specifically Blue Angel), Yuusaku, Revolver, Kusanagi, and Go

#toolshipping #vuullet #words of mimi

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littlegalaxies · 6 years

Text

Fave makeup RN

Not that anyone’s cares but I’ve been getting into makeup more and more and figuring out my routine and what looks and works best and at first I was like tf why is makeup expensive so I only used fckin ELF lmao and then it was like TARTE AND SEPHORA ONLY but now I’m like u know what cvs got mad coupons

Primer: yet to find my go to favorite, but I like anything moisturizing. Becca ever matte poreless primer is EPIC at making my makeup last all night, but it’s better for me if mixed w something moisturizing

Eyebrows: maybelline total temptations eyebrow pencil does the damn job it’s basically benefit goof proof but half the price. A good gel is still benefit gimme brow but maybe the tarte busy gal brow is just as good too

Foundation: haven’t been wearing much of it lately, but I’m a sucker for fenty! Need to try tarte rainforest of the sea and shape tape foundations I think I’ll like them

Concealer: tarte shape tape always and forever. If I wanna be frugal, colourpop and maybelline age rewind are excellent too. Maybelline fitme concealer is decent

Powder: maybelline better skin foundation powder makes my skin look smoother than my titties! No need for $30 powder lmao. Also setting powder is overrated but I also have dry skin so I don’t really need it

Contour: not into cream contour these days but I have liked the fenty match stix. I’m still using the kat von d shade and light like it’s nobody’s business tho. The highlight shade for under my eyes Changed my life. Also Anastasia Beverley hills and NYX palettes SUCK don’t get them

Bronzer: ok butter bronzer does just frickin fine but I think I like my tarte Park ave princess better. I wanna try the balm’s bronzer too

Blush: currently using the balm but I think I like tarte’s better too lol

Highlighter: I’ve been using Becca but oh GURL the maybelline master chrome is the FUCKING AHIT I’ve never gotten so many damn fucking comments on my highlight ever before. The Becca one I was using before was like duo chrome so it was cool but this is waaaay more every day it’s amaze ok this is schmoney for like $10

Eyeliner: still have yet to find something as user friendly as kat von d tattoo liner!

Mascara: ur girl has been hooked on maybelline big shot in blackest black. That shits golden but the brush isn’t the best for inner lashes so I gotta figure out what to do about those, I think the benefit roller lash has been gucci for those and lower lashes

Eyeshadow: I don’t fuckin know how to wear this whit but I bough the balm nude beach palette and I’m in love even tho idk what to do

Setting spray: okurrrr I love Mac fix plus but after learning Mac is still not cruelty free, I’m gonna go back to urban decay all nighter bc that shit IS ANIMAL FRIENDLY. I also like Mario bedascu rose water spray that shit is nice esp on a beauty blender

Lips: nyx lip lingerie in teddy/beauty mark/push up are my go tos. I liked huda beauty but they bled a lil. Kylie’s are ok but nyx and colourpop are cheaper and just as good. The balm also mad good. PS fenty lipsticks SUCK except for the Stunna lip paint that one I love and hate but overall good

IK IK IKKKKKKK I USE A LOT OF TARTE BC ITS GOOD ON U AND FOR YOU!! And it’s cruelty free and usually vegan which is kewl

Oh I guess maybelline too but that’s NF bc they aren’t cruelty free in China which is where they sell a lot of product so idk if they ever fully will be ://////

#this is me keeping track of mh makrup #like if i end up liking a more high end product rememwvr thsi fucking post julie #its for ur own good #personal

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noahhernandez · 7 years

Text

original (April 3rd, 2013)

3 year difference (April 3rd, 2016

Difference ? (Feb 10, 2017)

3 year difference lol

1. Is this the best year of your life? tbh this year has sucked so far lol!!!!!

it is april and i have not turned up like expected

Only Feb. Things are going okay

2. What was the first thing you did when you woke up? turn on the TV and see what was on netflix

Laid in bed and contemplate whether or not to make coffee.. i did

Struggled getting out of bed for work

3. The person you like is? nobody.

my co-worker Darrell.

Kenny.

4. Is anything bothering you? The fact that my room is a disaster, my grade in Algebra 2 is a 68, and that i am not famous

The fact that my room is still a disaster and that i am dropping my biology course because it was too hard for me.

The Fact that my room remains a disaster, and that I’m constantly stressed out about school, and I’m really trying with Kenny but I’m probably too invested

5. Does anyone annoy you? A lot of people do, white people

A lot of people still annoy me

White People

6. Would you like things to go ‘back to normal’ with a certain someone? no

Angelica, Natasha, and Coby because things really were cool but it doesnt matter anymore

No.

7. What was the las,t thing you did before you went to bed last night? I was in my mom’s room with like 3 kids and some guy and i was just chillin out with them

I was laying in bed watching Family Guy

Filmed a speech for my public speaking class, finished it, submitted it, walked in on my roommates fckin on the couch, went to sleep, they fought til 530am

8. Is life good? its decent

I’m content, I have my own place, I go to school full time, I work full time, I’ve got great friends, money, a car.

Still have all those things, I’m just tired at this point

9. Do you remember who you liked on New Years? nobody.

Nobody probably wait just kidding Harry

I think I was starting to like Kenny

10. Do you still like them? nobody

I like him now

11. Do you still speak to them? nobody

Yes

12. Told your parents you were going somewhere but went somewhere else? my dad, but my mom and i have a good relationship and i can tell her i am snorting cocaine tonight and she will be like ’ ok be careful xo’

Does not matter anymore

i’m an adult now

13. Are you dating the last person you kissed on the lips? haha, no.

No I am not

Nope

14. Do you hate the last girl you had a conversation with? my cousin no she snorts cocaine

My manager no she is my favorite

I think it was Angel, and she is like one of my best friends

15. Would you go out with someone right now if they asked? what do you mean like out like lets get together or like hey im hungry wanna come with me to get wings

It really all depends on who the person is

not desperate, really depends on who the person would be

16. Three days from now will you be in a relationship? i hope not

No lol

Probably not

17. If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you? they do tell me sorry fellas youre kinda ugly

Yes

18. Have you kissed anyone in the last month? no

Yes

19. What was the last reason you went to the doctor for? my back.

My back

Have not been to the doctor since.

20. Do you like being home alone or does it freak you out? i liked it but then everyone left for me a week and i thought i was going to go insane

It does not matter I am always locked in my room.

I don’t talk to anyone at home anyways

21. Would you ever kiss anyone you texted today? i havent texted anyone today

Hm yes, my co-worker Kevin, but only because he is the best looking person I have texted today

Hm maybe like 2 people ? haha

22. Do you have any bruises on you? no thank god

Cuts and burns from work

I cut myself at work today

23. How was 2011 for you? 2011 was great actually, i ended jr. high really well, and started high school really well too making friends and stuff

Same

lol

24. How late did you stay up last night and why? like 1230, and no reason

230? because after work me and my coworkers went to IHOP and then just chilled out, and I watched like TV til i fell asleep

About 530 because my roommates were fighting and I could not sleep

25. Do you ever get good morning texts from anyone? no

Kind of

26. Do you regret anything you’ve done lately? i regret um nothing

I regret nothing still

Nothing

27. What woke you up today? this sound of little Einsteins singing

My brothers gf was talking really loud for like 2 seconds

My brother waking me up and my 30 alarms

28. What makes you happy? coffee and snickers and boys

Coffee, cigarettes, friends

Coffee, boys, and friends

29. Ever kissed on a boat?

Still a no

30. Have you ever been told that you are amazing? yes

Plenty of times

I honestly dont think so tbh wait JK yes

31. Finish this sentence: The last person I kissed is… ugly?

A good guy. sorry lol

the person I currently like

32. This time last year, can you remember who you liked?let me think no

It is April, prom season for me… you know I think I was chillin’

Wowza, Darrell my co-worker at the time, he recently just moved to Ohio

33. Do you like when people play with your hair? yes

yes

34. Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow? nOPE GOT SCHOOL LOL

Nope, I still got school

Nope, this time I got work

35. Waiting for something? for someone to come up and be like hello u wana be famous and rich

To get my degree, then someone come up to me and ask me if I wanna be famous and rich

To become board certified and open a private practice and someone ask me if I wanna be rich adn famous

36. Was last night terrible? nah

No, it was a good night tbh, lots of laughing with all my coworkers

Sure

37. Did you lose friends when you started dating someone? no

no, i would not let that happen

I would never let that happen

38. Are you the type of person to make people laugh? yes i am i am the class bitch ass motherfucker but they think im joking

yes

Sure

39. Don’t tell me lies, so is the last person you texted attractive? i last texted angelica and she is pretty if she tries which is rare

yes

40. Is tomorrow going to be a good day? it better be mrs honings better have passes me

no, i have school and then work right after

Work til 5. Maybe something with my friends after, but I doubt it

41. Are you missing someone?no

sure

42. Has anyone ever tried to ruin a relationship you were in?no

no lol

no haha

43. Do you believe in karma? eh

not at all

Maybe a little bit now

44. Do you sleep with a fan on? omg i have too

yeah the ceiling fan and then a standing fan

Same still

45. You think anyone’s thinking about you right now? of course yes

i wonder

Probably not.

46. Is there anyone you wish you were spending time with right now? not really

yes

47. Do you go to school? imma sophomore

freshmen in college

4th semester in college.

48. Is the person you last texted single? yes

yes

technically yeS?

49. Who was driving the last time you were in a car? omg?? my mom i think

I was driving, brother in passenger seat

50. Have you ever used the word ‘rawr’ in an actual conversation?OMG NEVER IF ANYONE CAUGHT ME SAYING THAT I’D KILL MYSELF

lol no

jokingly now every once in awhile

51. Are the blinds on your window open or closed? closed

closed

Closed

52. Did you leave milk and cookies for Santa when you were little? still do lol

jewish

No i live alone now, so thats a waste of money

53. What were you doing at 11 last night? in my mom’s room with those people i stated above plus my brother

at work goofing off

Getting ready to get off work

54. What could you eat any day of the week & never get tired of? wingstop wings

sushi

Coffee

55. Is there someone you wouldn’t mind kissing right now? justin bieber???

a lot of ppl including celebrities

Shawn Mendes!!!

56. Someone knocks on your window at 5 am, what do you say? wat the fuck do u want im sleepig

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOMH

how did u get up here i live on the third floor

No i dont have a quarter

57. Would you change yourself for the person you love?no

Yes maybe ??

58. Let me guess, your last incoming call was from the opposite sex? wow u guesssed completely wrong

yes

um i gonna guess sure

59. What are you supposed to be doing right now? cleaning

getting ready for work

Getting ready for bed

60. Would you have sex with the 5th person on your contacts?no

im not even going to look

It is my ex, lmao, yes I would sure

61. To who did you last give the finger to? i cant remember

my coworker Jesse

My manager, Ware

62. Did your last kiss take place on a bed? on someone elses

uh no

No.

63. Do you have someone who you can be your complete self around? brianna sam angelica michelle and others yes

the majority of my coworkers and all of my friends i still have

Angel, Brianna, Brit, and like Michelle

64. Do you talk in your sleep? no

i do not

depends on the situation

65. Do you have a good relationship with your parents? yes they buy me stuff and i am forced to like them

i dont talk to either of them that much

Haven’t seen my mom in months

66. What time did you wake up today? 7:45

8:30

67. What were you doing at midnight last night? IN MY MOMS ROOM

At work fixing to leave

Leaving work

68. What song are you listening to? some chris brown song

Team by Iggy

Betty Who- Somebody Loves You

69. Has anyone put their arms around you in the past 5 days? like a hug

Yes

70. How do you feel about chocolate-covered strawberries? mmmmm

mmmmm

71. Do you have nice eyes? they’re dark brown

lolno

72. Is your current hair color your natural hair color? not really

yes finally

Barely, the tips are brown from when I died them 7 months ago

73. Are you texting anybody? no

Told everyone I went to bed

74. Do you swear in front of your parents? god no

75. Concert tickets or NFL game tickets? concert tickets

concert tickets!!!!!

CONCERT

76. Are you addicted to cigarettes? not yet hehhe!:)

yes, I wish i could stop smoking.

LMFAO “Not Yet” I’m on a process of quitting right now. Very difficult

77. Do you tell your parents everything? no

hell no

78. Do you have any tattoos? not yet

i have 4 tattoos.

still only fucking 4

79. If something was wrong, who is the first girl you would go to? idk

Brianna

80. Do you have any nicknames? bitch

Noahita

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