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#obsessive fyodor
tojisprincesa · 7 months
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I'm your angel
fyodor dostoevsky x fem reader
a/n : This is my first piece of writing containing smut, so please be nice! English is not my first language & I don't know how to properly format my writing on here either so I apologize in advance. I would GREATLY appreciate feedback! Thank you for reading my work and hope you enjoy it :)
word count : 2.1k
summary : The devil is real. And he's not a little red man with horns and a tail. He can be beautiful, because he's a fallen angel and he used to be god's favorite.
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✧ warnings : MDNI 18+ NSFW sexual content, rough sex, choking, breeding kink, hickeys, manhandling, possible objectification, degradation, dacryphilia, name calling, overstimulation, multiple rounds, unprotected sex, penetrative sex, belly budge, stalking, yandere behavior, virginity loss, manipulation, possessiveness, obsession, sacrilegious, creampies, mention of sex in a church, slight dubcon, betrayal, multiple orgasms, dumbification,  aphrodisiac serum usage, non consensual recording, praise, hints of aftercare, reader referred to as a dog, reader is gifted but its not used in this piece, not proof read. please tell me if I missed anything. MDNI 18+ NSFW
Inspired by:  I'm Your Man by Mitski
On a midnight walk home, alone you enjoyed the breeze winter had bestowed upon Yokohama. The moon was full and shining down on you. It was so cold out you wouldn't be surprised if you woke up to snow. You had stayed at the agency quite late finishing up some paperwork. Dazai had been no help, again. You hated working on a case with him simply due to the fact you were always stuck with ALL the paperwork. This case had been a big one, thanks to the decay of angels.
You loved your job truly, helping people was your purpose in life. Your ability was called “ Angel Wings”. It was a rare and very powerful ability, you were able to use what was essentially dark magic. But what gave your power its name was your majestically, beautiful wings. They looked just like an angel’s pure white wings but as fate would have it yours were as dark as the midnight sky. 
You were the only one in history with this gift who had been born with black wings and the only one who had access to dark magic as well. The people of Yokohama had rumored it to be a bad omen.
Your parents had left you abandoned on the steps of a church. As a baby you were taken in and grew up in the monastery. At 10 years old you had discovered a file the sisters had on you, only to discover your parents had left a note on you as a baby stating only god could save your soul, they called you an abomination more so, a fallen angel. It was at that age you were determined to use your powers for good. 
You’d like to believe you left that life behind at 18. But only god knew it plagued your thoughts day & night. And on this fateful night that's exactly what you thought about on your journey home. You were so lost in thought you didn't notice the cold amethyst eyes that tracked your every move. 
As you arrived home, all that your body wanted to do was rest. But you decided against that so you took a hot shower to relax your tense muscles. You deserved it after a long day at work. Unfortunately, it gave the devil watching you a perfect opportunity to set his trap. After your shower you decided to skip dinner due to your exhaustion and headed straight for bed. You had failed to notice the faint smell of  gas leaking from under your bed. That mistake would cost you your freedom, you had not only fallen in a deep slumber but in the jaws of his trap.
As you opened your eyes all you saw was the moonlight so scarce, you couldn't even make out the room’s layout. But you immediately recognized the ominous voice that spoke to you. Fyodor Dostoevsky. You and everyone in the agency had been warned of this man who was a demon, no more like the devil himself. Dazai had given a brief rundown of his encounters with such a foe, stating even he himself wasn't sure of his ultimate goal. He warned that no one could win against him nor his intelligence. He was always a step ahead. 
“Awake already? That gas should have knocked you out for a couple more hours..huh you're full of surprises angel” he spoke as he stepped into the light shining through the stained glass window. He looked like a god. 
“There’s no use yelling, it's just you & I in the middle of nowhere so don't get any ideas. I doubt even Dazai could find us here” 
It was as if he was reading your mind. You were left speechless whether it was out of fear or shock you weren't quite sure. But you couldn't let him know that. So you got straight to the point.
“What do you want from me?”
“It's quite simple really. I want your cooperation, your loyalty, and you.”
‘“ Me ?” 
“Yes. You, mой ангел”  [my angel]
He reached out to caress your cheek & your mind was racing. But the moment his ice cold fingers made contact with your warm rosy cheeks, it went blank. All you could focus on was Fyodor, his touch was all consuming. You found yourself leaning into him but the cushioned chair you were tied to did not allow much movement to your dismay. Your wings were aching due to the tight position you found yourself. 
His haunting eyes were staring right into your soul, you were convinced he could rid you of all the sins you've committed. You did not dare to look away. He then let out a chilling laughter while holding your chin. He said
“It's not like I am giving you an option dear. You will essentially be my dog. You will obey my every command and this will be the only warning I give you, do not test me. Your disobedience will not bring any harm to you, yourself but I cannot say the same for others at the agency. Nod, if you understand.``
You gave him a subtle nod. He had made it clear you had no choice but to obey him. An eerie smile stretched across his face, it sent chills down your spine. But the way he was speaking to you sent a pulsing heat to your core. It was embarrassing to have your mind and body reacting differently, to have them be at war.
Unbeknownst to you at the time, Fyodor had injected you with an aphrodisiac serum while you were passed out. He thought it would make you easier to manipulate. Not because he thought it would be difficult but because he had a strong desire to see you beg for him. The same way he had yearned for you all these months. Watching you from the shadows, studying you. You were the object of his desire. His obsession with you was sickening and unexplainable. He had to have you and now he does.You were his. He wouldn't. No. He couldn't hold back any longer. 
What shocked you like electricity running through your veins was Fyodor’s lips on yours. It was an intensely passionate kiss. You found yourself kissing him back instantly. The heat you felt between your legs had spread all over your body. His kiss had left like an ice cold sip of water in the blazing hot summer heat. You needed more to soothe this ache and he knew that. 
In an instant you were untied and swooped up being led towards a bed you hadn't even realized was there. As he set you down on the cool silky sheets he made his way down your body undressing you with kisses. You couldn't protest, not with this heat making you physically dizzy, you needed him and fast. It was at this moment you realize this must've been his doing but you didn't care, a part of you had wanted this. Deep down you wanted this handsome devil to have his way with you. You were his for the taking. 
 “Please” you moaned 
“ Please, what angel. Use your words” 
Fyodor was losing his mind at how simple this all was. You really were like a dog begging for its master.  
“ Please Fyodor.. I– I need you, inside me” You groaned frustrated with the heat building up and meeting its peak. 
“Such a greedy mutt I have” he whispered in your ear as he nipped it. The degradation heightened your arousal, he quickly undressed and pressed his body against yours while he sucked on your neck, marking you as his. Simultaneously, his fingers played with your clit and he applied pressure as he twisted and pulled on it. You moaned out in painful joy. 
“ More. I need more” you pleaded. He slapped your aching pussy, hard. 
“ Where are your manners stupid slut–” he felt what was like a heartbeat come from your cunt as he said that. 
“ Oh fuckk my angel is no saint, I will indulge you my dear” you felt tears escaping your eyes from how much you needed relief. Fyodor could tell from how wet you were alone. He was going to make sure only he could relieve this heat from you now and forever. He had done his research and found that you were a virgin. Not yet tainted, his angel had yet to fall from the favors of god.
He took his tip and rubbed it on your cunt giving you pleasure moaning out as he inserted himself fully. He did not give you time to adjust, not that you needed it despite it being your first time. Like a whore you screamed out in pleasurable pain. It was as if you were made for him, made to take him day and night. You were his to breed like a bitch in heat.
You looked between your legs to see the moonlight illuminating his pretty face perfectly. With the stained glass window behind him he might as well have been fucking you in a cathedral. He no longer looked like a god, he was your god, your savior. 
His touch was heavenly. His pace was relentless. In and out he went with harsh deep strokes he hit your weak spot every time. He left no part of you untouched. You felt like you were suffocating in pleasure. If sex was considered a sin out of wedlock, God could add it to your list of sinful deeds. You were born a sinner but you'll die a saint. You were sure Fyodor was god himself. Each touch he bestowed upon you, cleansed you. 
You whimpered as you got closer to finishing. He could tell by how your cunt squeezed  around him. 
“ My sweet angel, what would the detective agency say if they saw you now? Taking me so well, huh?” 
You couldn't help but squeeze him tighter and cry out to him. He leaned down and whispered 
“ Go ahead and say hello” as he gestured to his right. You had failed to notice a camera was recording you, capturing everything that was conspiring between the two of you.Your dignity was long gone at this point. You obey his command and let out a high pitched moan.
“ helloooo”
Fyodor groaned at the fact it wasn't even a command but you followed it nonetheless. Maybe training you wouldn't take long after all. 
“ Good girl, my good girl” 
He sped his pace up with harsher strokes while one hand  had went down to play with your clit and the other around your neck restricting your air flow. You rolled your eyes to the back of your head and your tongue was hanging out of your mouth. You were panting like a bitch. So he'd treat you like one. He let go of your throat only to grab you cheeks, squishing them together to spit in your mouth. This only brought the knot in your stomach closer to snapping. 
“ Please, Fyodor let me cum” you begged. And who was he to deny his pretty angel when she asked oh so nicely. 
“Look me in the eyes when you cum angel”
Looking at him and seeing his eyes full of lust and love. His devotion to you brought upon your unraveling. You moaned his name as you cummed causing him to reach his peak as well.
His cum had you filled up to the brim. You could feel it sloshing around inside you when he applied pressure on your stomach. He knew you weren't on any birth control but that didn't matter. He needed a successor anyways. He wanted to see you plump and round full of his seed. This was his way of permanently marking you from the inside out.
 So cock drunk you had lost count of the round you were on. You only realized a vast amount of time had passed due to the sun rising. The sheets were soaked from your juices mixed together. You had done unholy things. But you felt reborn as though you had been baptized in his cum. There wasn't a part of your body that wasn't covered in it by now.Your body had been pushed past your limits. Fyodor knew that and cleaned you up, he brought you water and ibuprofen. He caressed your hair holding you against his chest, laying down he praised you. 
“ You did well my angel” rewarding you with a kiss on top of your head. You smiled and succumbed to your exhausted state. 
You were now a fallen angel. And Fyodor was your god.
After you had given Fyodor all the information he needed with no protest. He rewarded you, like a pup. You had betrayed the agency like a man. One day you'll meet your judgment by the hounds and whether that be heaven or hell you didn't care as long as you had Fyodor by your side. For if he should leave you, you should die. You deserve it don't you? It had sealed your fate. You were positive no one would ever love you like your god again.
✧ ALL WRITING BELONGS TO ME. PLEASE DO NOT STEAL MY WORK. ✧
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cheriiyaya · 2 months
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Darling can I be your favorite?
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YAN!Nikolai, dazai, and Fyodor x Fem!reader
You're the girl of their dreams, so why would they let you slip away so easily?
Contents: UNDER 15 DNI !!, obsessive behavious, yandere DC, manipulation, isolation, physical abuse+blood in nikolai's part from the yanderes pov, I do not condone any of the behaviours shown in this fic; these are not examples of healthy relationships or behaviours.
A/N: ...well this is my first yan fic and my first time writing for nikolai so his part is kinda short and maaybe ooc...hope it's good tho !!
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Dazai swears it wasn't supposed to be like this.
Your relationship with dazai started out pretty normal,
if normal was a thing with dazai osamu. but he always tried his best to be the best lover you could have, spoiling you in affection and sweet words. You trusted him, and for the most part he allowed his heart to open and let you inside.
But the heart of the former demon prodigy was like a Venus fly trap, luring you inside with sweetness before it cages you in and devours you whole.
Sweet words twisted into cruel lies and his gentle affection turned into manipulative games. And like the fool you were you fell neatly like puzzle pieces into them.
It wasn't his fault, dazai told himself whenever you'd cry or become frustrated.
Whenever you cried he'd grasp you in his arms, cooing softly and telling you in the nicest way to shut up. That this was what was best for you.
How could he let you out where he couldn't see you? What if you got hurt? What if you left him and stabbed him in the back? You were his everything, a precious thing. Don't people lock their precious metals away from prying eyes, so they can never be stolen?
Everything he did was for you, why couldn't you see that? You were naive, so naive and so trusting.
You couldn't even deny it, seeing how you'd run back to him every single time he promised it'd all stop and it'd go back to normal.
"hush, c'mon now bella', don't look at me like that...I'm doing this all for you, I promise it'll get better from here, okay...? Don't worry that pretty head of yours about anything anymore."
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Fyodor's relationship with you has always been a little...off but you never thought too much of it.
Sure, sometimes he's overly protective, or he always needs to know where you are, but he's always considered your emotions.
Or you told yourself that.
First it was limiting who you could go out with without him following close behind. Then it was no contact with other men he deemed "dangerous" to you, and they'd mysteriously go missing soon after your interactions with them. Then it was no leaving the house without him, among other controlling rules he imposed.
Even throughout this, fyodor never stopped to assure you that it was all your fault. It wasn't his fault he was such a a possessive man.
You were such a pretty thing, and pretty things draw ugly eyes that wish to snatch them away. It wasn't his fault you were so alluring, what was he supposed to do?
If only you'd never caught his eye.
You didn't need anyone else, fyodor would tell you. Wasn't he enough? He gave you everything you wanted and you'd still thrash around and scream at him like a ungrateful child.
If you ever tried to leave him, fyodor wouldn't be concerned. Afterall, he knows where you are at all times (those cameras around yokohama have another use other than tracking his enemies, you see)
In a few hours time, you'd be back in his loving arms as he told you how much of an idiot you were for not trusting him.
"See, dear? It's useless to try and leave me. This is what's best for you, and you do know that, don't you?...Come here, stop crying angel, this is your fault after all."
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Nikolai was quite upfront with his love for you.
Which is why as soon as your guard was down he snatched you away from the worlds keen, prying eyes. Locked away like a bird in a cage, what hypocritical actions from a man that preached freedom.
This was freedom for him, however. of course this was wrong! But knowing this and dissociating himself with what was widely considered a moral "evil" is the best way to prove ones freedom, no?
You felt suffocated-not only was the snowy-haired man always around you, stuck to the hip, but his affection was certainly unusual.
Huh? Someone made you uncomfortable? Don't worry, their severed tongue will be delivered right to your doorstep!
How you wish it was Nikolai's head instead.
Nikolai doesn't like to, but hes not against hurting you for his selfish purposes.
In fact, there was something so pretty about you when you were looking up at him with big, glossy eyes and your skin stained with welts and bruises-maybe even a spattering of scarlet blood. You're so tempting like that, how could he not smother you in his love, however twisted it may be?
You were his, and his only after all. Why are you resisting?
"Eh? Dove, why're you crying? Ohhh, c'mon now baby, you gotta listen to me now and this'll all go smoothly, you'll see!"
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©Cheriiyaya 2024
Tagging: @aureatchi @little-miss-chaoss @hanging-wisteria @atzuhi @lovesick-fairy @adoredazai @ravencincaide @dazaikinniess @nyx-prodigy @himikoslove @teddirika @hyacinth-venom @kaitoluver @dydrem
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cryptidkey · 20 days
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Maybe a silly fyodor doodle if you’re up for it? (Just him doing something ridiculous perhaps)
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Combined these two requests bc I think they’re similar
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trivia-sea · 3 months
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if meursault had shared prison cells
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lady-tortilla-chip · 1 year
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I saw a rant about how the back and forth between Fyodor and Dazai is ridiculous at this point and like. I think that’s the point. The point is that one is not actually superior to the other in regards to intellect so they are ALWAYS going to be stuck in this cycle of ‘well I thought of/planned/predicted that!’.
The difference is in their connections and what those connections are made of. I find it fascinating actually that Fyodor thinks he’s won because he STOLE gravity away from Dazai and claimed Dazai didn’t even know how to use it when he had it! The thing is though, Chuuya doesn’t seem to be under Fyodor’s control anymore and he hasn’t ever chosen the people who try to use him like an object over Dazai. And despite the four years of separation (which was longer than their time together) he always came when Dazai expected him to.
And I’m thinking he expects him to now which would ultimately be what tips the scale in Dazai’s favor. Because where Fyodor sees a tool Dazai sees his partner. I’m also thinking Chuuya isn’t the only key to success here and that was why he chose Sigma too (if the points where he thinks about the ADA not using each other is any sort of foreshadowing).
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antikr1sta · 11 days
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BSD sketchbook artdump part 2 (brought to you by the voices™)
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just some shit from my sketchbook idk
enjoy
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ccarrot · 1 year
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Asagiri likes to base his characters off of the protagonists of the literary works by the authors they're respectively inspired by. Ex. Fitzgerald shares Gatsby's charisma, wealth, dubious business ventures, and overwhelming desperation to create the ideal life for his loved ones. In Anne of Green Gables, kindhearted orphan protagonist Anne has a combative relationship with her primary love interest Gilbert, and her stubbornness and pride leads her to frequently beating him up and giving him the cold shoulder. This is most likely the source of our kindhearted orphan protagonist, Atsushi's, relationship with his primary love interest, the stubborn and prideful Lucy.
Another aspect of the way Asagiri writes characters is Dazai. He is undoubtedly Asagiri's favoritest boy, so there's a sizable chunk of the cast that is actually constructed to be a foil to Dazai.
Why'd I mention that? It's because That is a precursor to who I actually wanted talk about, FYODOR! Fyodor Dostoevsky was created to be the ULTIMATE foil to Dazai, his very anthesis. The reason being Crime and Punishment.
C&P follows Raskolnikov, a down on his luck and VERY unstable resident of St Petersburg. Fyodor from BSD is definitely based on him.
Raskolnikov has an ubermensch complex. He sees himself as the dealer of divine justice, a servant of God. Sound familiar?
Raskolnikov believes the pain and suffering in his city being caused by the corrupt pawnbroker. Fyodor thinks that all the sin in the world of bsd is caused by ability user. They both draw a false conclusion. Perceiving the evil in the world is rooted in something that's only a small contributing factor.
They both take. DRASTIC action. Raskolnikov commits murder. Fyodor.... starts an international terrorist organization i guess.
Crime and Punishment is divided into two very distinct parts: The crime - the Murder Raskolnikov commits, and the Punishment, everything he has to deal with afterwords.
Raskolnikov is also! suicidal. it's a notable part of C&P. He frequently thinks about ending things, and wants to drown himself in the river, but then ends up disgusted by the notion when he witnesses someone else attempt.
Basically Raskolnikov is suicidal. Yozo from No Longer Human is suicidal. These are the characters that Fyodor and Dazai are based off, and it can't be a coincidence
Important to note that Both Raskolnikov AND Yozo end up living to an old age by the end of their respective novels.
Dazai and Fyodor are REALLY similar, but their differences are very very striking. Dazai likes people, when he dies he wants it to be a suicide that doesn't inconvenience anyone, he doesn't believe he belongs with humanity. Fyodor believes himself as a man on God's mission, we've only ever seen his ability kill ordinary people, AND he wants all ability users to not exist anymore. But, doesn't killing all ability users include himself?
Basically, I have a theory that Fyodor's ultimate goal with the Book is really an elaborate suicide plan. Because Fyodor doesn't have a GOD complex, he has an UBERMENSCH complex, he sees himself not as the ruler of humans but a CHAMPION of humanity. He's using his belief that ability users are the Root of All Evil as grounds to eliminate them all and himself. He thinks he's taking one for the team. Not only does he want to die, he wants to drag the world down WITH him.
But BSD is about people finding a purpose in life, key word: LIFE! Dazai WILL NOT die because he hasn't found what he's looking for. Fyodor's plan WILL fail. After that what's in store? He'll have to face his punishment, right?
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based on my experience with ocd
The Years - Virginia Woolf / Girl, Interrupted / Come with Me Now - KONGOS / Unwell - Matchbox Twenty / The Walking Dead / Sharp Objects / ‘Notes' from The Underground - Fyodor Dostoevsky / Franz Kafka / Overdrive - Katy Rose / Obsessions - MARINA / Pi (1998) / Ride - Lana Del Rey / Empty - Olivia O’Brien / Let You Down - NF / Every Single Night - Fiona Apple / Spring Breakers / Heavy - Linkin Park, Kiiara / Holding On To You - twenty one pilots / Thinking Bout You - Ariana Grande / Hurricane - MS MR / Teen Wolf 3x14 / The Monster - Eminem, Rihanna / My House - PVRIS / Sick - Cassie Steele / Teen Wolf 3x18 / Winona Ryder / The Monster - Eminem, Rihanna / Oh My God - The Pretty Reckless / Jujutsu Kaisen (x) / Where Is My Mind? - Pixies / Afraid - The Neighbourhood / Sickman - Alice In Chains
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xieliancore · 7 months
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more bsd stickers, decay of angels version this time!
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goozeghost · 2 months
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I think i fancy the insanity
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sableeira · 1 year
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I wish we knew more about how bsd characters figured out they have abilities. The fact that transferring an ability is confirmed to be rare implies that most characters just randomly figured out their abilities. Like did Kunikida one day write in his planner “I need to buy new glasses” and suddenly glasses spawned in his hand? Did Tanizaki play tag on the playground and just matrix-ed into thin air? Did Fyodor just randomly touch another person and see them drop dead in a pool of blood in front of him?
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doalkaynaksuyu · 6 months
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monster high! fyozai gelir mi hocam🙏
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my brain chemistry is forever altered
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spacexseven · 1 year
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Tuna, messed up idea, but imagine thriller buddy cop comedy turned full blown yandere horror with: scapegoat! Darling based on the serial killer au. Darling just has terrible luck and gets pinned all the murders and worse thing? they wake up one day, covered in blood, in a strange place with the cold corpse of a red headed man. It takes a while for the implications of what happened to hit them and they later find out they now have mutiple abilities. Abilities they never had before. Or! maybe, this is a crappy isekai au with bad end! serial killer reader. sigma 🤝 isekai scapegoat darling - 🦄 (im thinking about random ideas too much while i should be finishing other wips and ideas.)
manga spoilers below regarding the unknown doa members and a future part of the doa's plan :) i took liberties with the extent of the book's abilities so. don't question it hfhfh
in the same universe as sk reader, but this time, reader is a stranger who has been brought into the bsd world as a pawn in fyodor's new plan. here, fyodor has broken out of meursault already. fyodor centric but implied sigma x reader and nikolai x reader
cw: murder, dark isekai, death, start of an obsession, manipulation, kind of dehumanization of reader, fyodor is Evil.
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let's say things were not going according to plan. the hunting dogs had found the coin bombs in the casino, and now all eyes were on sigma and the associated members, mushitarou was out and working with ango and the ada, and the port mafia had seemingly come to help the ada too. it would only be a matter of time before kamui's identity was revealed, and that would destroy everything he's worked for thus far.
it would be easy to do as kamui says and unleash bram's infection across the population; it would only take weeks, if not days, for the virus to spread with kamui's ability in hand. but fyodor disagreed with his decision. no, there was a better way to do things. all he needed was time to distract the public and get everything back on track. if kamui's identity was revealed now...it would throw the world into chaos, yes, but not the kind he needed.
this called for his last resort.
though he hadn't told anyone, there was a little more than a side of a page left blank in the book. on the written side, he had intentionally left a very part blank on the offchance that things would stop going his way. kamui was unaware. of course, but that was for the best.
the first order of business was to ensure ango sakaguchi was dead.
his ability would prove to be too much of a hindrance since he could use it to find kamui and the others. with the information he had, he could somewhat be certain of where ango was and what he would be doing.
under the moonlight, he writes, ango sakaguchi walks down the alleyway, believing himself to be alone. suddenly, there's a strange sensation at the back of his neck; he considers turning around to face his pursuer and slowly reaches for his gun. but it's too late. the minute his hand reaches for the handle, something pierces his chest...
he can almost feel the words coming to life, twisting reality. fyodor smiles to himself as he finishes writing the last line; besides the corpse of ango sakaguchi, a person awakens. in their hand is a gun, the bullets of which match the ones inside ango. he writes about the blood splattered newcomer methodically cleaning up the scene and disposing of the body and evidence.
this person's ability allows them to take the ability 'discourse on decadence' for themselves.
it's a little bit harder to alter history, to make it so that the deaths of numerous ability users before were a result of his new subordinate's work, and give you all the power you need to be useful to him. he has to write down all the details about the deceased users so that there are no discrepancies, has to ensure the crime scenes are cleaned up but with enough clues so the implication is clear. there is a serial killer loose in yokohama, one that has been targeting ability users for almost a decade now.
the special division wouldn't be surprised that ango had become a victim; it made sense because he had been strongly involved in the case for a while now, but this also made it a priority. files about the sky casino were put on hold, and now the terrorists of the armed detective agency and the serial killer were the priority of the government.
it's funny; the special division thinks that the serial killer is working with the ada, which is why you were not caught despite the agency being aware of your presence all this time, and the ada believes you to be working with the doa. they would all be running in circles, chasing their own beliefs, with no consideration of fyodor's involvement.
nikolai brings him updates; his pawn is in a constant state of confusion and shock, and still unable to use your ability as it was intended. you're plagued by nightmares, too, and still afraid of everyone. he chides fyodor for not writing you to be a calm, composed person, so you would continue your work as fyodor intended you to, but he only had so much space. besides, he tells nikolai, pawns can be trained, too; like pets. all he needs is to offer you a home, an identity, and a life—just like he offered sigma—and you'd be eating out of his hand. what did it matter to you, after that, if a few more lives were lost as long as it guaranteed your own survival?
he arranges for documents to be made; for you to have your own job and home so that there's no suspicion about your identity, arranges for nikolai to surveil you closely and watch out for the eyes of god, lest you're caught by fitzgerald, and for sigma to gain your trust. he himself comes to let you know about all the abilities you have and helps you wield them easily
it's a shame. on paper, you were the perfect pawn—but you're too weak to act on your own yet. he doesn't mind the extra time spent, however, and he coaxes you into targeting mushitarou, whose ability would be extremely useful, but your hands still shake even when he places his over yours and directs the gun for you, and you still cry when you see the blood pooling out of mushitarou, folding in on yourself with shallow breaths. you still tremble when he asks you to use your newest ability.
you're still sniffling when he pets your head and suggests you clean up, and though you go quiet, he can tell you're still haunted by your actions when he looks at the glossy emptiness of your eyes. even after all this time, you still look conflicted when he praises you for a job well done.
it doesn't matter what you feel right now, anyway. fyodor smiles to himself when he catches sight of you slumped up against sigma, watching the other go through his customer files, because he would never let you leave. you don't have anywhere else to go, or anyone else to turn to. nobody would accept you like they have, and you knew that; even if you were so terrified that your hands froze over the trigger or you can't pull the knife out, you'd still force yourself to do it if he asks.
truly, you make for a perfect pet.
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frostlineprince · 1 year
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my (one of) favorite(s) lil' guy(s)!! (and then he's a terrorist)
art by me
edit: the little fyolai ones holding hands are plushies
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lnkedmyheart · 1 year
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I am a queer, here to be baited. Give me more.
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etrevil · 8 months
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Bones this is two times two much 🤣
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