#practicing sucked the whole way through but now i can draw many different varieties of potato sacks! progress 😎

[saturdaysky]

The Meeting on the Turret Stairs but Make It Shadowgast

After more than a year, this painting is done! This is one of my favorite paintings, and it was wonderful to reimagine it to suit one of my favorite pairings. :D This is by far the most I have ever worked on a painting, and I learned so much while making it. Please enjoy all the details I crammed in there to find.

Some close-ups under the cut!

And where it started, the original painting and the sketch:

Cheers, all 🥂💜🧡

#i'll admit it. through brute force - aka choosing pictures where i need to draw it - i have come to a point where clothes are fun to draw #i have evolved beyond my clothing-hating potato-sack-drawing ways #practicing sucked the whole way through but now i can draw many different varieties of potato sacks! progress 😎 #my art #shadowgast #essek thelyss #critical role #the meeting on the turret stairs #critical role fanart

[firewins-the-fangxrl]

Building Anew

Now that May The 4th Be With You Excange has revealed I’m crossposting my fic! so here’s some fluffy Grogu and Luke bonding! (also can be kinda dinluke if you want)

(link to the fic on ao3 in the notes cause tumblr sucks and will hide posts with links!)

---

In his efforts to rebuild the Jedi order Luke finds himself learning many new things, some were expected such as old Jedi teachings and methods of finding force sensitives, others things he had not expected, such as the favourite colours of his younger students.

"Wait Master Luke, lightsabers can be purple?" a tiny Twi’lek pipes up.

"Yes there's a multitude of different colours that lightsabers can take depending on the users connec-"

"Can they be rainbow? Rainbow is my favorite colour!" comes another voice.

"My favorite is yellow!" from a Nautolan boy.

The ensuing lesson turned into a session of sharing favourite colours. Which, if Luke is being honest, is surprisingly enjoyable.

Teaching turns out to be one of Luke's favourite parts of resurrecting the order. Each of his students is different and helping them find and control their connection to the force is rewarding. The kids are also interesting to talk to, they're happy to tell him, with the honesty and excitement that comes with childhood, about a variety of things from a cool bug they found to what sensing presences in the force feels like.

Luke learns a lot about each of his students, both mundane and not.

Grogu is probably one of the most interesting to communicate with. Luke learns a number of things about Grogu, firstly that the kid has had a long life.

A really long life.

The first time Luke really gets a sense of Grogu's age is a few weeks after he was first brought to the small temple that acted as the youngling teaching quarters. He and Grogu are meditating together when he's hit with a rush of unfamiliar memories.

Huge sprawling temples filled with the bustle of people going about their day. The sound of children playing and distant lightsaber practice. The sight of adults hurrying past, lightsabers strapped to their hips, some with padawans trailing behind trying to keep up.

It takes him a few seconds to piece together that the memories are of the old Jedi order at its height. He turns to observe the small green child, struck by the fact that the people from that memory are probably all long gone.

"You're a lot older than you look, aren't you?" he murmurs quietly.

The child doesn't move, still deep in meditation, so Luke returns to meditating as well. They settle back into peaceful and companionable silence.

The second thing he learns about Grogu is that he loves his dad. Though Luke only met him briefly he can see that they have a strong bond.

Grogu is also more than willing to share stories of his and his dad's adventures with Luke. Every memory Grogu shares is laden with warmth and adoration.

The adventures are also seemingly extremely dangerous, which is how Luke quickly learns fact number three.

Grogu's father is a stone cold badass. From risky rescues snatching Grogu from the clutch of Imperials to killing a fully grown krayt dragon (something he is honestly in awe of) the man seems to be an unstoppable force powered by protective instincts.

As the stories go on Luke starts to wonder if part of the reason Grogu's father is so unstoppable is because he never stops to think anything through.

Of course Luke isn't exactly one to judge since he's nowhere near the picture of restraint himself.

But still, for force sake the man let himself be swallowed whole by a krayt dragon!

Even Luke isn't quite that dumb… well for the part he's not.

Grogu, it seems, has inherited his father's lack of regard for consequences, as he's quite willing to attempt to eat anything without waiting for Luke to check if it's poisonous or not.

However Grogu's favourite foods by far are frogs and cookies. Luke isn't quite sure what those two things have in common but he does know that cookies must be protected from the green bean (especially if they belong to another student) and that most of the frogs on Draay 2 aren't poisonous.

Except for the tiny yellow ones.

Chasing down Grogu to remove frogs from his mouth to scan for edibility becomes a daily struggle.

This is when Luke first realizes that Grogu is a menace.

The child has more chaotic energy than should feasibly fit into such a small being. Most memorably in the lightsaber incident. The less said about that the better but Luke has certainly learnt his lesson about leaving his lightsaber in a place that small green toddlers can reach.

He's glad to still have his legs.

A fact that he has not been at all prepared to learn came during one of Grogu's father's visits. Which was that Din was apparently a king.

Din lands his ship at the small landing platform adjacent to the temple. Grogu is practically vibrating with excitement by the time the loading door opens and the man walks out, beskar armour glinting in the sunlight.

Unlike his previous visits he is flanked by two other Mandalorians, both wearing blue armour.

Din turns to one of the Mandalorians and says something, too low for Luke to overhear at this distance, and the two Mandalorians turn to go back inside the ship.

As Din walks closer, Grogu wriggles free from Luke's arms and runs to his father. Din drops down and scoops the excited child up into his arms. Luke can hear Grogu making excited squeaks as Din murmurs something to the child.

“Who are your friends?” Luke asks as Din walks closer.

“Royal guard.” is Din’s only response.

“Royal guard?”

“I’m technically the Mand’alor”

“Technically?”

“It’s… complicated. I don’t suppose you’d want a second laser sword?”

“Uh, no thank you” Luke says, noticing one of the blue clad guards glaring at him from the ship. Her helmet is off and he can see short red hair and a slightly terrifying expression that reminds him of Leia when some poor soul angers her.

“Yeah that’s probably for the best,” Din says wryly.

The rest of the visit is fairly normal, except for the bodyguards hovering over Din. Luke gets the distinct impression that the guards are more interested in ensuring that Din doesn’t make a run for it than protecting him from danger.

Something he learns after a while is that Grogu has nightmares.

Grogu is more than happy to share snippets of memories and stories about his life before the fall of the old order. However he avoids the topic of the fall itself. Luke doesn’t push Grogu to share anything he’s not comfortable with.

Luke is pretty sure that's what the nightmares are about since Grogu refuses to tell him anything about them.

He’s okay with that. He doesn’t need to know the specifics to comfort the small scared child that comes to him. Luke just holds Grogu and murmurs reassurances.

Sometimes, if it’s really bad they start a holo call to Din, he always answers no matter the time. They stay up late talking about whatever they can think about until Grogu has fallen asleep, comforted by the presence and voice of his father.  

Once when Din is visiting Grogu, Luke wakes to a knock on his door in the middle of the night. He finds a very tired looking Mandalorian carrying Grogu.

“He had a nightmare?” Luke asks.

Din nods clearly suppressing a yawn.

“Come on in. I’ll make some caf.” Luke says, stepping aside.

They stay up talking long after Grogu has fallen asleep, Din tells Luke about the struggles of being a king and Luke shares some stories he’s collected from being a teacher.

He tells Din about the lightsaber incident. Din finds it funny and Luke would probably be more annoyed if the man’s laugh wasn’t so pleasant.

By the time Din leaves, the sun is just starting to crest over the horizon and Luke realizes that he has to go set up for his morning class.

He decides that there are much worse ways to spend the night than with Din and Grogu.

Grogu apparently agrees with him based on the number of crayon drawings he makes of the three of them after that.

Luke is pretty sure Din gets a few of them framed.

#the mandalorian #the mandolarian #the mandalorion fanfic #Luke Skywalker #din djarin #Grogu Djarin #grogu #baby yoda #dinluke #dinluke fic #if you want #Fic #fanfic #firewins writes

[angrypixie-sarisa]

Of Death and a Baby

Piedras Rodantes Pt. 23

Sam xMexican!Witch!fem!readerx Dean (polyamorous)

Author’s note: There’s the use of indigenous language, Nahuatl, casually but magically as well. Nahuatl is the language used by the Aztecs. It doesn’t mean they were magical, but Día de muertos was celebrated long before the Spanish conquista. Because of the focus of death in this chapter I personally think that the connection between the tradition and language is quite beautiful and I wanted to use it in a way with respect. I personally am learning Nahuatl and felt the enthusiasm of incoporating it to the story. If someone finds it offensive or has notes about it I will gladly take them and even erase the chapter if necessary.

Warnings: kinda long, swearing.

(no gifs bc my wifi sucks)

“Okay, so, are you sure he had no aura? Like, not even a spark of red? Yellow? Heck, not even blue?” Diego was sitting criss cross in front of you. You shook your head as you finished drawing on your floor.

“Nothing, and when I say nothing, believe me, it was nothing. You remember that spooky book at school? The one with the weird gray lump?”

“Wha-the weird one?”

“It reminded me so much of that.”

“Word?”

“Word. Hence this.” You signaled towards the things drawn on your floor, all surrounded by the respected color, tarot cards, crystals and herbs. Diego sighed as he helped you light up all the candles. 

“You know, if they find out about this, they’ll get mad.” He said as he placed his hands on his knees, palms hugging them lazily. 

“¿Quién?” You asked as you did the same thing. He gave you a look as if you were supposed to know who he was talking about. 

“Sam and Dean?”

“Oh, pft, who cares if they get mad? Esto es justo y necesario. Además sus sentimientos no tienen nada que ver en si hago magia o no. Screw them.” he dedicated you a proud look, before clearing his throat. “Ready?” 

“On three?”

He nodded. “One.”

“Two.”

“Three. Nihuinti, nichoca, nicnotlamati, nicmati, nic-itoa, nic-elnamiqui: ¡Maca aic nimiqui, maca aic nipolihui! Incan ahmicohua, incan ontepetihua, in ma oncan niauh: ¡maca aic nimiqui, maca aic nipolihui! Estoy ebrio, lloro, me duelo, digo, me acuerdo: ¡ojalá no muera yo, ojalá nunca perezca! Donde no se muere, donde se encumbra, allá vaya yo- Ojalá.” You both chanted in unison. The circle started to illuminate with variety of colors, though the ones that repeated the most were red, purple, orange, green and blue. You kept chanting the same words over and over until in the center of it all, you got an answer. 

Slowly, you both opened your eyes and moved your hands from your knees as you looked at the center on the circle. 

You sighed. In temporal burnt letters it was written “Tetlapopolhuiliztli. Atlenkauitl.” Which meant sorry, no time or bussy.

“Well, there’s another way.” 

“I know, but it’s the longest way of invoking death.” 

“But it’ll be worth it. You’ll have your answers.” 

You sighed while passing a hand through your hair. 

“Es la muerte. Tiene sentido que esté ocupada.”

“Ni modo.” Your phone vibrated in your backpocket. You took it out and checked it only to find a text from Lisa. She managed to convince Dean to get on board with the gun lesson and the knife throwing. Verga. You forgot about it or rather you were utterly convinced that he wouldn’t give in that you decided to focus all your energy and thoughts to summoning Death. But well, she was busy and now you were stuck multitasking. 

“It’s not fair. I wanted to learn how to throw it.”

“I know champ. But for now your mom gets this privilege.” You caressed his hair slightly. Though Lisa didn’t feel it like a privilege. She would rather not have to know how to fire a gun and throw a knife, but her situation demanded it so here she was. 

“Okay, once you master the movement of your throwing hand and you don’t fear to hit your foot instead of the wood your standing on-” 

She looked at you with a mock on her eyes at your teasing. 

“Then you’ll move from throwing at the floor to throwing at a wall. For now, stick to the other method, the precautions and keep practising. Salt in the windows and doors, the whole shebang.” 

She nodded as she and Ben helped you get the set up you brought for her practicing. Next thing you were at the door, already saying your goodbyes and as you walked a block away your phone vibrated again. Since you wanted to summon her, you kept thinking everything could be a signal that death actually made some time to pay you a quick visit. But sending a text wasn’t her style and when you saw your screen it was Dean’s name that appear. It was a text, however, you didn’t get the chance to read as a call came to replace it. 

“Hey. I was just with Lisa and Ben, made sure the house’s properly safe and all. What’s-”

“Y/N, we need your help.” He sounded desperate, his voice was rushed and it sounded as if it came from different places, kind of like up and down, for some reason. 

“Wha-Why? With what?” Just after you asked your ears were filled with the sound of whales, very noisy and demanding whales with a tiny sob here and there. 

“Is that a baby?!” 

“Yeah! I told you we need you! Quick, I don’t know for how much longer we can handle this!” 

“Okay, but-”

“Perfect. See you here.” And then he hung up.

+++++

There was a knock on the other side of the door, a very loud knock. "No, no please don't…" Dean muttered as he heard the baby starting to cry again. Sam passed a frustrated hand over his face as he saw his brother open the door only to be met by another catastrophe. Your eyes were flames and he could swear you could kill anybody with that glare. 

"What. The. Hell? At least if you ask me to come over give me the fucking place where you're at! I had to open five different doors to come here! There's a Swedish family you owe an apology to!" You practically helped yourself in. Taking deep breaths to calm yourself as you walk through all the room. Your eyes landed on the whaling baby. "Hi. I'm sorry, did I scare you, darling?" You went to pick him up and to the brothers surprise the baby lifted his arms at you. "Yeah, come here buddy. Hi! Are these evil men not attending to your needs? They're pretty awful aren't they?" 

"Excuse me?" Dean glared at you and the baby as he settled his head on your chest, on top of your heart. You passed a soothing hand through his back and rocked him gently. 

"Sorry I woke you up. They were awful to me as well." You whispered to him.

"Oh, come on!" Dean, once again, complained.

"That's a lie." You heard Sam say at the table.

"Don't believe them. They would say anything to save their necks. A bet they don't even hold you. Tsk. Muy mal." With every word you felt him relax and you looked down to confirm that his eyes were droopy. 

"Hey, about your spanish." Started the older Winchester and measured his words as he was met up by a murderous gaze. 

"What about my Spanish?"

"I'm tired of wondering whatever you're saying all the time. Could you just cast that spell that Diego did for Tyler?" 

"Me too." 

You turned to look at Sam and you couldn't see anything other than mere curiosity. You rolled your eyes as you whispered the spell and a light orange smoke appeared at your feet before dispersing quickly, as though something scared it. 

"Did it-did it work?"

"Pues claro que funcionó. ¿Verdad que sí mi niño?" And as you spoke words started appearing as if they were watching a movie with subtitles. 

"Wow! That's awesome! Say something more." 

You thought for a while as if suddenly you didn't know any Spanish. Funny enough, the next words you spoke weren't Spanish. 

"Ma cochi, pitentzin. Maconexteca pitelontzin. Ma cochi cochi noxocoyotl. Maconexteca noxocoyotzin. Maconexteca pitelontzin. Ma cochi cochi pitelontzin. Maconexteca noxocoyotzin. Maconexteca pitelontzin. Ma cochi cochi pitentzin." But it worked, the spell translated the Nahuatl words, the song to them. But of course, the sound of it wasn't familiar to the brothers. 

The baby in your arms cooed lazily at the sound of the song. Instead of bothering to answer the brother's questions you kept singing to the babe until he fell asleep. Only then did you stop singing and placed him in the crib. 

"What was that?" Sam asked. He had stood up from his place on the table to lean nearby on a wall. 

"Nahuatl." You said nonchalantly. But of course that wasn't a satisfying answer. 

"I studied Nahuatl so it makes sense that I know how to speak the language." You looked at their dumbfounded faces and sighed. 

"Do you need a quick class of Mexico's history?" Seeming that there was no response you continued. "As in the United States, México was also populated by indigenous cultures. The dominant, and I'm not proud about this, culture was the Aztec/Mexica. They dominated great part of the country so it's the most spoken indigenous language, although there's still a small number of people that speak it. I personally fell in love with it and so wanted to learn it and did." You shrugged when no response came from them. "What can I say? I'm a woman of many surprises." 

“I see that.” Sam said, patting your head gently as he went to head outside. 

“Where are you going? I hope you didn’t just drag me around here to babysit.”

“I just have to cover something I missed. Brb.” He winked at you before disappearing behind the shut door. 

You sighed and passed a hand through your hair, then turned to look at Dean, who was resting in one of the beds. “Well at least you’re here to keep me company.” 

You sat beside him, looking at the wooden bars of the crib whilst biting your lip, deep in thought. He never used to pat your head, he only did it once before you told him to stop because you felt like a dog. 

You felt heavy fingers tapping at your back lazily. You turned around to face the tired look on his face. “What ‘cha thinking?” 

You released your lip and turned your attention back to the crib.

“Nothing.” It would’ve convinced him if it wasn’t for the fact  that your voice sounded low and dark, causing him to sat up. 

“That’s the worst lie you’ve ever told.” When you didn’t answer, he pressed. “Is it Sam?” 

At that he caught your attention, seeing as your head quickly spun around to face him with a puzzled look painted in it. 

“You feel it too?”

“Feel what?” He thought the distance between you and his brother was bothering you and he didn’t know why it was there in the first place. You two should be like newly weds or something, after all, you were reunited again. 

“Nothing, nothing.” You panicked and closed your mouth before you could say something else. 

“Y/N.” He warned. Well now he needed answers. He wanted to know what was happening. 

“Dean, you don’t wanna know, okay?”

“Except I do, you’ve just called me Dean.” 

Finally, you met him in the eye again. “What?”

“You only call me Dean when you’re serious.”

“That’s not true.”

“Mhm, sure.”

You laid back on your forearms, still looking forward. “Don’t know what you talkin’ ‘bout win- I mean, De-”

“See, I told you!” He slapped your thigh playfully as he chuckled, earning a few silent laughs from you. 

“Okay, alright, you’re right. I do call you Winchester frequently.” His hand wrapped above your knee and squeezed gently. He gave you some time in silence before he planned to press again. He didn’t want to give the impression that he wouldn’t ask again but also he didn’t want to annoy you with his insistence. 

“What is it? What about Sam?”

You groaned. “You never give up, do you?”

He shrugged as his thumb made tiny circles on your jean wrapped knee. 

You sighed. “Fine. Si te vas a poner en ese plan, pues ya que.” You huffed as you sat up again. 

He smiled softly. “ I love this spell.”

“Yeah, except now I can’t talk shit with you in the room anymore.” 

He bumped his shoulder with yours. “Don’t change the subject.”

“Wha- you were the one who did.”

“Y/N.”

“Ay, sí, ya sé.” You rolled your eyes, took a deep breath and let go. “Do you think Sam is… You know, our Sammy?” There was a pause as his hand stopped moving abruptly. You started playing with one of your beaded bracelets nervously as you waited for his answer. “What do you mean?”

You sighed before answer. “He’s not Sammy, Dean. He’s… Different and not in a good way.”

“What- How is he different?”

“Well he doesn't fight with you.”

“Oh, so you prefer it that we fight?”

“No, i don’t mean it like that. I mean it’s not natural. You guys fight and now he rises from the depths of hell and suddenly your brotherhood is just paradise?”

“How do you even know that we fight normally?”

“He told me before going back to hunting, before going to hell. Dean he’s not Sam. There’s something wrong with him, he-he has no aura. He’s way to poised and calm all the time. He patted my head.” You started listing all the things, carefully toning down your voice so you wouldn’t wake up the baby again. 

“Wow, what? Your basing all this on him patting your head?”

“It’s not just that, didn’t you hear what I said? He had literally no AURA. And him patting my head? I asked him not to once and he never did it again through the time we were together.”

“So he’s awkward, he’s remembering how it was having you around it doesn’t mean anything.”

“Well, how do you explain the aura then?” You crossed your arms. 

At that, he remained silent, clenching his jaw as he thought. “Maybe you’re still tired, from the djinn thing.”

You took a deep breath and clenched your fists. You knew he wouldn’t understand.

“Just forget I told you this.”

“No, Y/N, I-” But whatever he was about to say got muffled by the sound of something splattering, followed by baby cries. You both looked up to see skin and blood on the wall. 

You both hurried to aid him, you beating Dean to it as he answered a call from Sam. 

“Dean.” You called as you picked the baby covered in green goo. He hanged up the phone and took the baby from you. But neither of you knew what to do except for panicking and do a funny dance where you stood. 

“Shapeshifter.” 

“I know.”

“The baby, he’s…”

“I know.” 

“What do we do, Y/N?!” 

“Um, okay, well…” You stammered. “No need panicking.” But what could you do? Was there anything to do, really? All you could do was take care of him until you could figure out something better. “Um, we- we can’t have a dirty baby. Let’s clean him and for once stop him from crying.” 

The Winchester nodded rapidly. “Yeah, yeah that sounds like a plan.” He took the baby to the bathroom, living you staring at the mess left behind. 

“I guess I’ll deal with this.”

+++

You finally got everything clean except that the baby kept crying. You tried cooing at him and playing with him but nothing worked. It would’ve been easier if you had a baby toy but, the brothers didn’t buy any. 

“Y/N, come on. You were supposed to be the baby whisperer.”

“Oye! Just because I’m a woman it doesn’t mean I’m the baby whisperer.” 

Then, there were knocks on the door before a voice came through. “Manager. Everything okay in there?” You frowned as you both shared a look before glaring at the door. 

“Yeah, no, we’re fine. Thank you. Good night.”

“There’s been complaints. Mind opening the door, sir?”

“Ay, pinche wey, pues que le valga a la verga.” You whispered. The older Winchester pressed a hand on your mouth despite your complaints. “You cannot curse in front of a baby.” He scolded. 

You shrugged his hand away. “Oh, grow up, everybody does.”

“Sir?”

“Uh, it’s not a good time. J-Just got out of the shower.” 

The doorknob started moving impatiently. You shared a look with the hunter. In your eyes he found an ice cold blue that wasn’t supposed to be there. He saw you move to hide on one side of the door, leaving the baby to him as he placed the him in the crib, before mimicking your actions. 

The door opened up to reveal a police man with a knife. Manager, mis huevos. Dean heard your voice in his head, not affording to look at the translation.  The intruder just needed to advance a couple of steps before he grabbed his arm and you got the knife out his hand. 

Struggling, the man pushed you two away from him, making the stupidest thing and pushing you two in between the baby and him.

“Get the hell out of the way.”

“No that’s not gonna happen.”

“A child should be with his father.” 

“Prove he’s your son, then we’ll consider it.” You said. 

“I’m not just talking about me, I’m talking about our father.” 

You masked your confusion well enough but the hunter looked as if he took the bait. You mentally facepalmed.  And as the guy went to make his move you quickly dodged his kick before you kneeled and kicked his other leg. 

“Y/N, look out!” 

He grabbed you by your hair and pulled. But just as sudden as it was it stopped. Dean had jumped into action and wrestled with the man. 

“The knife!” 

You felt it beneath you and you grabbed it as you went and pressed it on the shapeshifter’s throat. He groaned, placing his hands around the hunter’s throat. 

“Try me, I’ll choke him before you could slice my throat.”

“You talk to much.” As you went to move your hand he slammed his head with yours, freeing himself from your threat. 

You placed a hand on your forehead and saw him towering over you. But before he could do anything else a gunshot was heard and his body met the floor with a thump. 

“Well, there goes our deposit.” You heard Dean say towards the door. You needn’t see it to know that it was Sam.

+++

You were driving to meet up with Samuel and the cousins. The boys had discussed about the events and Sam had suggested to go to Samuel. You weren't happy about it, your gut kept telling you that something was wrong. Still, there you were, sitting at the back of the car, keeping an eye on the sleeping baby. 

You looked out your window, not really knowing where to look at, but you certainly didn’t want to face forw, when something caught your eye. As if the world had slowed down, you perfectly saw a lost soul watching dumbfounded at the cars as if they didn't know how they got into the road. 

Your fingertips started tingling and you glanced down at them to find them colored a coal black tone. 

Verga. You glanced around shoving everything trying to find anything that could help you; there had to be something you could use to hide them. 

"Hey, what's up?" Dean asked watching you through the rear mirror. 

"Uh. Sammy…" you cleared your throat. "Sam, do you happen to have the other day's gloves?" 

"Uh, I think so. I think there somewhere back there." 

You sighed and mumbled a thank you. You were sure to move carefully, trying not to flash them your fingertips. 

Just as you thought you had no exit to your problem you saw crushed leather fingers beneath the baby's car chair.

"Ay Dios mío, gracias!" You quickly retrieved them, shoving your hands swiftly into the soft fabric from the inside. 

"So, what's with you and the gloves?" The older brother asked. 

"I- I well, you know, I tend to wear them when I get too overwhelmed."

"Overwhelmed, 'bout what?"

"Er, um, pues, 'bout the energy of people or a place, sometimes certain hours of the day. It depends but the feeling's rare."

While it was a true statement, it had more to do with the fact that death started surrounding you and it would only intensify once the summoning was complete. But, the fingers usually happened if the spell for summoning death worked a little too well.

+++

It was night time when you arrived and the chills down your spine intensified. There was no way you were leaving the baby’s side now. 

You felt your phone vibrate in your pocket. Soon all of this mess would be over. 

You held the baby close to you, careful not to crush him, and the cousins gave you weird looks about it that you decided to take care of by giving them the finger. Every time you did, Dean shook his head. 

“Oh, relax he’s asleep. He can’t see me.” 

Gwen approached you with her eyes fixed on the baby. She went to caress his head softly as she said. “Well, aren’t you the best disguise a monster ever wore?”

You looked away from her, sure that if you stared at her for too long her head would explode. Instead you locked eyes with Dean and you both rolled eyes in unison at his cousin’s words.

However, she noticed. “I’m kidding, guys. Relax.” She said before going away. 

You lifted the baby softly so he could hear your words. “Cura, cura, cura. Sana todo lo que llevas. Que tus abuelos están contigo y sus espíritus te protegen.” It was an incantation to wash away the energy of the brother’s cousin, you didn’t want it sticking around where it didn’t belong. No one heard, but they did see you and questioned you. When asked what the hell you were doing, you shrugged. 

“Que te valga madre, ¿no?” 

When you fully lifted your gaze, the Sams were already heading towards you and the older brother had already stood besides you. 

“Hey, let me see the little guy.”

“That’s alright I got it.” You said firmly. 

Samuel smiled. “What do you think I’m gonna do?”

There it was, your ice cold eyes again. “I don’t know. What do you think you’re gonna do?”

“You don’t want an answer to that question.” Dean backed you up. 

“Well, I’m curious. Who exactly do you think we are?” Christian asked from his chair. 

“Hunters.” You both answered. But that didn’t matter because his response was only directed to the one on your right side. 

“Funny. Here i thought we were family.”

“Hey, let’s not get worked up.” Sam started. 

“Yeah, let’s not.” His cousin finished before directing his attention to something else. 

“Here, Y/N, it’s fine.” He neared you and looked at you. “Let me take him. It’s okay.”

“Heh, well you’ll have to rip him off of my arms.” You didn’t move. You stood your ground because stepping back would’ve ment intimidation and you weren’t intimidated you were furious. 

“Y/N.” Sam said quietly.

“No, don’t talk that bullshit to me. What do you want him for? Hm? Tell me, give me a good reason why you want me to hand him and I will.”

The room fell silent, more than it already was. You scoffed. “What you can’t think of a good one? He’s fine, he’s healthy, he isn’t injured. You want to take a look at him? Hear your words. Look. You can do that shit with your eyes, I don’t need to hand him over for that.”

Samuel, sighed, raising a hand to scratch the back of his neck. 

He’s nervous. The older brother heard your words in his head. His back shuddered, but when he turned to look at you he saw that your attention wasn’t directed at him. He didn’t even think you actually intended to talk to him. What did you said once? You tended to think loudly. 

“What are you gonna do with him?” The attention of the good ol’ Campbell shifted from you to his grandson. 

“Raise him.”

You scoffed. “Simón, wey. Esa ni tu te la crees.” 

“Raise him?”

“You got another suggestion?” 

“But-”

“It’s dangerous out there for him.”

“What about in here? What are we gonna study him? Poke at ‘im?”

“Your mind goes right to torture, Dean. Don’t assume that for everyone.” 

“What exactly you’re tryna say?” Great, now you got two angry people. Good luck fighting us.

“Sorry, I heard what you majored in. Down in the pit.” Christian retorted.

“Ay, pinche puñetas! Que te valga madre, pinche cabron de mierda!”

“Sorry, I don’t speak mexican.” 

You gritted your teeth. “And I don’t speak bozo, yet here we are.” 

“The hell is your problem, man?”

His cousin stood up and walked directly towards you. “You’re starting to become a pain in my ass.” 

“Take it easy. They’re my family.” Sam stepped in. 

Christian took a look at you. “I’m not scared of fighting a girl.”

“Funny, I was going to say the same thing about you.” 

Dean gulped and looked at your eyes, they were no longer icy blue, they were pure red, as fire and blood. As if you could burst something into flames by just looking at it. 

“We’re done bristling up here or what? Nobody’s doing anything to him, guys. When he’s old enough we throw it to him.” Samuel spoke. “He wants to volunteer to help out, that’s fine.” 

“Could be great.” Mark added. 

“How?” You asked lowly. 

“Think of the kind of hunter he’ll grow up to be.” 

“Hm. See I didn’t see it before but now I do. Thank you for that, you’ve opened my eyes.” You said sarcastically. 

“You have to be joking! I mean, come on. You can’t Angelina Jolie a shapeshifter.”

“Why can’t you give me an inch of trust, Dean?”

“Y/N, give him the baby.” Mark commanded. 

“Uy, sí, mamón. Lo que usted ordene. Se me olvidaba que le tengo que hacer caso a cualquier pendejo que abra la boca.” 

“Maybe because you two are back from the dead and I seem to be the only one who wants to know how.”

“You’re not the only who wants to know.” Sam said softly. That took you off guard, it sounded so genuine yet only in that moment he felt honest. 

“Well, there’s too much of mystery in this family for me to get comfy.”

“Then don’t. But don’t put it on us. All we’re trying to do is invite you in. You too, young lady. You think we are some merciless hunters but we’ve been nothing but open to you. Christian, you’ve always wanted a baby, haven’t you?”

“I mean, yeah.” 

“Try to take him away from me and see what happens.”

Samuel scoffed. “What you think you can do better?”

“At raising him? Yeah, I do.”

“But didn’t you tell Sam that you didn’t want kids?” Gwen stepped in. 

“Well I changed my mind, sue me. One thing is for certain, I have a better chance. You guys are always on the run, always hopping from one town to another. You don’t have a steady income. I do. And I have a savings account with money enough to start a college fund. If you can’t say the same thing, leave the baby the fuck alone.” Your phone kept buzzing like crazy. Just a little bit more, he’s almost here. 

Everyone fell silent again. This was new to Dean. He had never seen you liked this but he always knew that you had a good way of shutting people the hell up with solid facts. 

Just when Samuel opened his mouth to respond, distant barks were heard and panic overflowed the room. 

You looked at Sam, only to find nothing but confusion. Then you turned to Dean, but he only dedicated you a panic look as well. You felt paralyzed, your body tensed and for the first time in years, you didn’t know what to do. Well, you did, but it was easier for you to think tit than to move your body. You had to blame it on the spell, it was making you slow and frightful, like an old person that had their foot more on the afterlife than on the material world

“Safe room.” Samuel said. He placed a hand on your shoulder and guided you towards a door. “It’s downstairs. The baby’s gonna be safe there, go! We got it, go!”

+++

Loud clanks and footsteps echoed in the safe room where the four of you where at. 

“Come on, Bobby John, you’ve got to be quiet.” Dean cooed at him above of you. You still didn’t feel like handing him to someone else. 

“I’m gonna go check, you guys stay here.” Sam said, but as he looked through the window his image was mirrored and the shapeshifter yanked the door of it’s hinges. He took Sam by the collar, blocking his attack and threw him out of the room, knocking him out. He spotted you and began to walk towards your direction, getting rid of Dean in the process, making him blackout as well. . He then saw you and took your form. 

“Give me the baby.” 

“Took you long enough.” You whispered before handing them the babe. The shapeshifter gave you a thankful look as they carried the baby in his arms. They took a deep breath as they relaxed knowing that his keen was finally with them.  

“Thank you for calling us. And trusting us, Y/N. Thank you for taking care of him, we are in debt with you. It did making the tracking easier”

“There’s no need for that.” You sighed. “I’m only glad he’s safe. I was the only one who thought he was better with his kind.”

Your mirrored self gave you one last nod before walking away. Just as they were about to round the corner, they turned to you. 

“But you didn’t trust one of us before. What changed?” 

“Like I told him. All I needed was proof that he was the father. Now it doesn’t matter anymore. He has no one close to him left. I’m sorry for all the trouble, it wasn’t supposed to go like this.” 

They shrugged and as they walked away they said: “Make sure to make your injuries believable.” 

Yeah. You thought and sighed. That was going to hurt.

The rest of it went like you expected, lots of clean up and confusion. Dean asked about the shapeshifter alpha (which was the one tracking the baby) and his grandparent and Sam answered patiently. 

Now you where at the walk to the car, tending to your black eye, that you funnily gave yourself, while the brothers talked. 

“You know what’s funny.”

“What?”

“Back there, the fight in the motel. That guy said that they had to be with their father. So maybe, he was talking about the alpha.”

“Uh, I guess so.” Sam said nonchalantly. 

“So you heard that?” 

“I don’t know, it was kind of a hot moment? Why?” He looked at his brother and then at you, but whatever he was searching for he didn’t find it.

“Because if you did know the alpha was out there and you knew they were looking for the baby, then that means you took the baby as bait.”

Sam fell silent but looked at his brother as he waited for the question. “So did you?”

“Did I what?”

“Took the baby as bait?”

“Of course not, Dean. I honestly thought Samuel was the best shot we got.”

The older Winchester looked at you for backup and his brother mimicked his action. 

“Ah no, a mí ni me miren, yo tengo mis propios problemas ahorita.” You pointed at your black eye and thankfully that made them take their eyes off of you. And the rest of the ride was silent as a tomb.

+++

When you got back to your house, a tiny shadow was waiting for you, meowing. 

You sighed, relieved. “Schrödinger, hola gato guapo.”

“You have a message. It’s on the altar.” He walked you towards your coffee table, where you had mantled death’s altar. In the center, on top of the tarot death card, there was an envelope with a black wax seal, death’s seal. 

You sighed. “Always so fancy and proper, huesuda.” You opened the enveloped and unfolded the letter that was inside. It was a personal letter to basically tell you to be patient, she had a lot of work but as soon as she felt a space between her schedule she would gladly have a cup of coffee with you. 

“Great. I’ll have to make café de olla de aquí hasta que aparezca.” You clicked your tongue.

“At least she communicated with you.” Schrödinger said as he rubbed his body against your leg. You smiled and picked him up. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.”

+++

@anathewierdo

#piedras rodantes #supernaturqal #supernatural fanfiction #Supernatural fanfic #supernatural imagines #supernatural #supernatural imagine #Sam Winchester #sam x reader #sam x reader x dean #dean winchester #dean x reader #angsty #angst #kindaangsty #notreallythatangsty

[ericsonclan]

Free the Fish!

Summary: Mitch and Brody go on their second date to the aquarium when Mitch decides to do something big to make Brody smile.

Read on A03:

“I’m so glad we were able to make it work to meet up today,” Brody’s bright voice had Mitch’s stomach doing somersaults within him. He felt utterly captivated by the feeling of her tiny hand in his. He was trying his best to take in everything she was saying as they made their way through the aquarium, but his heart was thumping so hard in his ears at the realization that they were actually on their second date that he sometimes forgot what he’d just heard.

Brody gasped excitedly, pulling Mitch along as she ran toward a cylindrical tank full of seahorses. “Look at all of them! Oh, they’re too precious!” Her eyes practically sparkled as she watched them drift around.

“Were there lots of seahorses where you grew up? In your…” Mitch paused as he realized he had no idea what a group of selkies would be called.

“In my rookery?” Brody shook her head. “The waters were too cold for them in the waters we frequented. I always thought they sounded so pretty though. Sometimes I’d wish we could live near a coral reef so I could witness all the different tropical creatures up close and in person. Then again…” She tugged her seal pelt closer around her shoulders, “I don’t know if that could compare to the peacefulness of the open expanses we swam in. A reef might end up being too busy for me with all the different creatures running around and bumping into each other,”

“Do you still miss it?” Mitch realized it was a stupid question as soon as he asked it, but he couldn’t take it back.

Brody seemed to consider it seriously though. “I mean, part of me will always miss it. It’s where I grew up. But my mom was right that I should learn to live in both worlds: on land as well as in the sea. And now that I’ve made friends here, it’s really become a second home,” The smile on her face at those words made Mitch’s heart melt. He could feel his tail curling against his leg. He hoped it wouldn’t weird her out if it accidentally brushed against her.

“Wanna go see the otters next? We did have those where I grew up. They’re super sweet, though they’re sort of food hogs,”

“Wherever you want to go,”

Brody paused, looking momentarily concerned. “You are having a good time, right? I know the aquarium isn’t exactly the most exciting place to go,”

“Are you kidding? I love it here! Fish, sharks, I love all that shit. And I mean shit in like a positive sense,” Mitch quickly amended, growing flustered.

“I’m glad,” Brody’s hand in his was warm as they continued along the walkway, flanked by enormous aquarium walls on each side.

As they passed a small crowd standing in front of the octopus exhibit, Mitch noticed a mother reflexively pull her child closer to her. It sort of hurt, but at the same time he couldn’t blame her.

Growing up as a minotaur, he’d gotten used to being perceived as a threat. The looks that annoyed him more were the ones he’d seen peers his own age giving him and Brody throughout the day. Brody could almost pass as human if not for the seal pelt round her shoulders, but Mitch could never hope to blend in. His horns and tail were a dead giveaway. Everyone knew that human-monster relationships did exist, but they were extremely rare. Still, what he and Brody were to each other was their own damn business.

I wonder if Brody knows what we are, Mitch mused as he followed her. I mean, we both agreed that the thing at the coffee shop was a date, but what does that make us now? Two dates in is too early to put a label on things, right? In truth, he wouldn’t mind calling Brody his girlfriend, even if it was fast. He’d had a thing for her ever since he’d caught sight of her big blue eyes that day she helped him free his horns from the hallway wall. But he wanted to be considerate of Brody’s feelings too. Calling her his girlfriend too early might scare her off and that would fucking suck.

They’d reached the aquarium with the otters. Brody sat down on one of the provided benches excitedly, scooting over further so Mitch could sit with her. She looked happy as the show started, watching the otters perform all their tricks, diving into the water or high fiving their trainers for treats. As the show continued though, a more serious, pensive look came across her face.

“Is the show boring you?” Mitch asked. “We can leave if you want,” He was enjoying it, but if Brody was uncomfortable, he was more than happy to head out.

“No, it’s not that. It’s just… I guess I feel a sort of connection with these particular otters,”

“How’s that?”

“They ended up here at the aquarium for a variety of reasons, but none of them actually volunteered to live here. They were all placed here by humans who figured they knew what was best for them. Who knows if these otters have spouses or children they were forced to leave out there alone? Sometimes it feels like that’s how I ended up at Ericson High too. I didn’t want to leave the sea, but my dad wanted to start raising me more like a human and my mom agreed it would be a good learning experience. Not that I’m mad I’m here now, but still it would’ve been nice to have a say in the matter,”

Mitch wasn’t sure what to say to that. He’d never exactly been the most eloquent with words and he didn’t want to say something that would end up hurting Brody rather than helping. Instead, he settled for patting her shoulder a few times before his hand came to rest there. He felt too self-conscious to draw it back and Brody seemed to be fine with it, so he let his hand rest there till the show came to an end.

Once it was over, Brody rose to her feet, looking around them. “I think there’s an outdoor section to the aquarium as well. Would you like to visit it?”

“Sounds cool,” Mitch walked alongside Brody, wondering if he should reach for her hand again. It had taken all of his guts to do it the first time. He didn’t know if doing it again would be too much. He was surprised when he felt something warm brush against his hand and realized Brody was reaching for it. He grasped hers eagerly, hoping he hadn’t surprised her too much with his eagerness. When he looked down at her she seemed happy though, almost peaceful. He was glad.

The first exhibit they came across was actually one with birds: a lorikeet forest. They walked through it hand in hand, joking and pointing out preening and flying birds to compare to their harpy friends Minnie and Sophie. There was a station in there which sold some sort of sugar water that the lorikeets liked to drink. It didn’t cost much so Mitch bought two cups. He ended up giving them both to Brody so he could get pictures of all the birds as they flocked to drink from the cups she held. A few birds landed on Mitch’s horns too, prompting Brody to set aside her cups temporarily so she could capture the moment on her phone. Mitch felt a little embarrassed by the whole thing, but it was worth it to see Brody’s smile.

Eventually they found themselves at the open tank exhibits. There were several pools of water raised only a few feet high so that children could look over into the water and observe horseshoe crabs and manta rays swim round. More adventurous youngsters could even run their fingers tentatively across the surface of the creatures’ backs. Brody and Mitch walked amongst the pools, looking into each one.

“These poor guys must be tired,” Brody noted with a sympathetic smile. “I know it would drive me crazy is every five minutes I had hands coming out of nowhere, poking at me while I’m minding my own business,”

Mitch nodded thoughtfully. It was a similar sentiment to the one Brody had shared back at the otter exhibit. Here were more creatures minding their own business when nosy humans had to come along, drag them away from their homes and use them for their own personal amusement. It wasn’t fair. In fact, it fucking sucked. Maybe it was time somebody did something about it.

Looking around, Mitch noticed they were near the sea lion exhibit. Ideally, he’d break them all out since he figured seeing them captive felt like seeing relatives behind bars to Brody. But he knew that would get shut down pretty fast. Security around them was intense. He did notice a few buckets though that had been left out by trainers after the last show. Normally they held snacks for the sea lions, but right now they were empty. Mitch could feel the gears turning in his head as they made their way over to them.

“Well, I think we’ve seen almost everything. Ready to call it a day?” Brody turned to him with an easy smile.

“In just a sec. First, there’s something I have to do,”

“Oh? What’s that?”

“This,” Without another word, Mitch grabbed one of the chum buckets, racing back to the open aquarium pools. He thrust the bucket into the water, scooping up as many horseshoe crabs as he could in one go. “Free the fish!” he yelled, laughing maniacally as he ran toward the exit. He would find these horseshoe crabs a new, better home as soon as he figured out where the fuck their natural habitat was. This was for Brody. He hoped she was watching.

----

“Well, that certainly was something,” Brody said softly as the two of them walked out the aquarium’s front doors.

“I didn’t even get 100 yards before they fucking tackled me,” Mitch groaned, rolling his neck and hearing a series of pops. “At least they caught the bucket before it fell on the pavement,”

“It was a very sweet gesture,” Brody smiled up at him brightly. “A bit crazy, but your heart was in the right place,” Mitch smiled down at her. “I just wanted to see you happy. I knew seeing all those sea creatures in captivity sort of bummed you out. At least I didn’t get you banned for life from the aquarium though,”

“We’ll find other aquariums to go to,” Brody replied, playfully nudging his arm. “You’re picking the location for our next date,”

A goofy grin spread across Mitch’s face. “There’s going to be another date?”

“Of course! What, did you think that getting beat up by aquarium security was going to scare me off?” Brody’s expression softened. “I know I’ve talked a lot today about missing home, but the truth is if my mom came here tomorrow and told me I was leaving, I’d be sad about that too. I’d miss Willy and Ruby and Clem an awful lot… but I think I’d miss you the most of all, Mitch. I could travel through all the world’s oceans and I don’t think I’d ever find anyone quite like you,”

Mitch felt his face heating up at her words. “I think you’re totally awesome, Brody. Like, the best,”

Brody seemed somewhat flustered by his words. “Thanks, Mitch. I-I think you’re the best too,”

As they made their way to the truck to drive back home, Mitch felt a happiness deep inside him that he’d never experienced before.

Brody was special. If he could, he wanted to keep her by his side for a long, long time.

#twdg #fanfic #twdg moody #twdg brody #twdg mitch #fluff #we are monsters we are proud au

[douchebagbrainwaves]

WHAT NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ABOUT SOMETHING

If you can make as good a bet a few months in. Where does it increase discontinuously? Far from it. I expected, but I don't think any would have traded it for a job in a cubicle. To see an interesting variety of probabilities we have to look at the problem from the other end. Frightening as it seemed to them, is practically nothing.1 If you're still in school, you're surrounded by potential cofounders. Fortunately the statistical approach is not usually the first one people try when they write more code. Remember, the original Silicon Valley startup, weren't even trying to start a startup doing something technically difficult, just write enterprise software. There's plenty of empirical evidence: armies, religious cults, and so far no spam that does.

And there is no way they can get around that. There's something fake about it. You need to work at something that pays the bills too, even though you don't need the money? In true startups, there are probably twenty sane ones who think Start another company? Raising money is not like applying to college, but boring. And the cost of checks may actually be increasing. And since it's hard to write a short comment that's distinguished for the amount of work that could be done in this area. Pictures of kittens, political diatribes, and so far no spam that does.

They think they're trying to convince investors. What's going on here? If you have a smaller pool to draw from this is not how to find a cofounder. I want to spend as little time inside the minds of spammers as possible. And in her typical quiet way she encouraged that illusion. That word business is an important one to remember. A job is the expectation that you're supposed to be there at certain times. Now I would guess that practically every Stanford or Berkeley undergrad who knows how to program has at least considered the idea of starting a startup and failed over someone who'd spent the same time working at a big company. And even within the world of content-based filters are the way to get started is to bootstrap yourself off your existing connections, be a good angel investor is simply to be a good angel investor is simply to be a single long stream of text for purposes of counting occurrences, I use the number of startups any one acquirer could assimilate, but if there is value to be had, in the summer of 2005, had eight startups in it. And odds are that is in fact the bullshit-minimizing option. Once they invest in a company with a high probability of being moderately successful. Why waste your time climbing a ladder that might disappear before you reach the top?

Suddenly a culture that had been more or less united was divided into haves and have-nots. Bad comments are like kudzu: they take over rapidly. Enterprise software companies aren't technology companies, they're sales companies, and the resulting hybrid worked well. And even within the world of content-based filters are the way to do this is through contacts. Their lives are short too. How do you do? Checks instituted by governments can cripple a country's whole economy.

There are already a bunch of big public companies doing search. If you start a startup, is start a consulting business you can then gradually turn into a product business. If you go to work for him unless he is super convincing. The thing that really sucks about having a regular job, you'll probably fail.2 The part of angel investing that the decisions are hard. Why do founders persist in trying to convince investors of something so much less speculative—whether the company is good. If you had a handful of the most successful startups are the ones you never hear about: the company that would be painless, though annoying, to lose. 9359873 managed 0. You don't have to explain not just the benefit but the cost. The reason the spammers use the kinds of things that matter: them. Not having a cofounder is a real problem. But it's important to remember we're trying to solve a new problem, because that means we're going to have to work at something that pays the bills.

Based on my corpus, sex indicates a. Ideally the answer is that it only recently became a good idea would be to accumulate a giant corpus of spam, or even triples, rather than their combined length, as the divisor in calculating spam probabilities. The most successful angel investors I know are mean. It has for me.3 As with the question of cofounders, the real lesson here is to start startups who shouldn't, I make my own life worse. When they think it's time to raise money, they try gamely to make the headers look innocent, but my guess is that it only recently became a good idea would be to accumulate a giant corpus of spam. And, by no coincidence, the corporate ladder had a value analogous to the goodwill that is a very real element in the valuation of companies.

Which means we will increasingly have to make their mails indistinguishable from your ordinary mail. And that's fine.4 If you develop ideas in a startup instead of within a big company. Creating such a corpus would be useful for other kinds of filters too, because it could be used to test them.5 Not opting out is not the long but mistaken argument, but the word madam never occurs in my legitimate email, and whatever was found on the site could be included in calculating the probability of the email being a spam. And only good people can ride the thermals if they hit them anyway. Here is an example of that rare bird, a spam that gets through the filters of someone who responds to a spam. 99. So you shouldn't do it if you don't have a good idea, because something changed, and no one has committed yet? How do you do? To some extent you have to put up with the bullshit forced on you, the more survives. They're saying He invested in Google.

One thing you learn when you get rich is that there are many different kinds of software being used simultaneously. The agreement by which you invest should have provisions that let you contribute to future rounds to maintain your percentage. Steve and Alexis. If they don't need you, it will stop working, and the most interesting fifteen tokens, where interesting is measured by how far their spam probability is from a neutral. They send spam because it works. Second, I think it will be accepted even if its spam probability is from a neutral.6 And the cost of checks, you can always write that book, or climb that mountain, or whatever, and then you realize the window has closed. Acquirers know the rule holds for them too: if users love you, you can do it on a smaller scale without moving. It occurs mostly in unsubscribe instructions, but here is used in a completely innocent way. Don't get hung up on mechanics or deal terms. The best way to get experience if you're 21 is to start startups, and explain which are real. That's why I love working on Y Combinator.

Notes

I'm not saying we should be working on what interests you most. 2%. The US is the discrepancy between government receipts as a single snapshot, but less than 1.

And I'm sure for every startup founder could pull the same work faster.

They then grant the founders chose? Think it's too late to launch. The undergraduate curriculum or trivium whence trivial consisted of Latin grammar, rhetoric, and journalists—have the perfect point to spread them.

That would be on demand, and partly because it consisted of three stakes. But when you had in grad school, because such companies need huge numbers of users comes from a mediocre VC. She ventured a toe in that water a while we might think it is very common, to the Bureau of Labor. People who know the combination of a rolling close doesn't mean easy, of course some uncertainty about how closely the remarks attributed to Confucius and Plato saw themselves as teachers of administrators, and some just want that first few million.

It is the unpromising-seeming startups encounter mediocre investors almost all do, so they had to bounce back. It is probably part of grasping evolution was to become one of the word wealth. The First Industrial Revolution, England was already the richest of their hands thus tended to be high, and Windows, respectively.

5% a week for 4 years. They would probably find it hard to grasp the cachet that term had.

#automatically generated text #Markov chains #Paul Graham #Python #Patrick Mooney #months #problem #companies #li #US #company #top #agreement #remarks #tokens #Silicon #sup #deal #ideas #option #someone #word #country #world #time #area #purposes #Stanford #Berkeley

[oswaldsirius]

Collection Events

It was requested so here it is! Collection event info bomb coming your way!

-

These events run differently than Story Events, the big difference being they use main story routes instead of their own, separate stories. There’s a few areas to focus on here, but the main one is on Lucky Times.

First thing’s first. Collection events are all about just that, collecting. The item here is ‘hearts’ and what you do is trade them, 10 at a time, for a variety of things in the event. It will give you 10 right off the bat to give you a basic idea of how it works and to get you that first item. They’ll range from stories, to in game items, to Avatar attire. There will be a list of all of them that you can check right away as soon as the event starts. As for getting hearts, there’s four ways to earn them during the event; login, reading a main story, duels, and buying them. Here’s a quick break down of how many they give and how you get them.

Login will give you 2, basically once in the morning and again in the evening. Provided you, you know, login. Main story parts will get you 5 hearts when you read all five chapters of one part. You only get them for finishing parts, so being halfway through one won’t do anything for you.

Story Checks (Intimacy and Avatar) will add another 3 hearts when you complete them. For Avatar checks, it doesn’t matter if you choose the premium or normal attire; it’s 3 hearts no matter what.

Route completions will get you 15 hearts. If you can’t tell, reading the story is where you really earn hearts in this event.

Duels will earn you 2 for every five duels you do, win or draw. I’m pretty sure it keeps track below where your stamina bar is on the duel screen how many more you have to do before you get hearts. So again, do them before bed because at some point they’ll make another five and there’s two more hearts for you!

There’s two ways to buy them from the item shop, with 90 crystals or 2000 Lin. You’re limited to 10 a day if you’re buying with Lin, but the ones bought with crystals are unlimited. But if you’re trying to play for free or are a new player without a lot of Lin, these are more for situations where you need a little boost to get whatever you’re aiming for.

Just like Story Events, you want to look at Lucky Times and bonuses here, but the catch here is as soon as a Collection Event starts, we’re all in it. There’s no choosing to enter because it’s not a separate story, it’s using what you play daily with to earn those hearts.

Lucky Times

There’s three types in these events, Story, Duels, and both together at once, and you earn double hearts in all of them.

Story Lucky Times. These are the Big Deal in these events. You already earn more hearts just reading the story; you earn even more when it’s Lucky Time. All of them are doubled, so now you’re looking at 10 for finishing a part, 6 for clearing a check, and a whopping 30 if you finish a route.

You want to push through your Intimacy Checks on these Lucky Times. The best practice here is to just not do them if they happen the day before a Lucky Time. Let’s say the first Lucky Time is on Monday, but your Check is on Sunday. Read the story part like normal, but when you get to the end, just don’t go through the check. Tap the home button to get out of it and just wait for the next day. Your daily tickets will refill to play the next part but first it’ll ask you to get through the check. Bam. 16 hearts because it’ll count not only the check, but also finishing that part as being done during Lucky Time! You’ll usually see this with the first Intimacy Check on a collection event and new route. They’ll line up pretty much like what I just described so you just have to wait until Lucky Time starts in your time zone to finish that check and then keep reading for another 10 hearts. So a little bit of patience with your checks and you’ve got 26 hearts in one sitting.

Another thing about routes and Intimacy Checks. If you aren’t going to have time to get a route near an ending, get it to an Intimacy Check and stop. You can bounce into the route on Lucky Time and earn 16 hearts for that day. Yes, you won’t advance in whatever new story has dropped if you don’t have extra tickets, but you’ll get the extra hearts. You have to choose for yourself which one you’d rather have.

This is also where you want to use any chapter tickets you’ve been sitting on. And you should be sitting on them. There’s not much point in using them outside of collection events/new routes because they don’t really get you anything beyond getting an end faster. Saving them for Collection Event Lucky Times is the best thing to do. The event itself will give them as rewards as you turn in hearts, but not very many so be careful with this. If you don’t have 5 to use, keep them for the next time. It’s that whole being half way through a part not getting you anything. If you play it smart and play for a while, you can chain these together to get a lot of points in one go but again, it takes patience and hoarding of items.

Duel Lucky Times. These ones aren’t bad but you’re only looking at an increase from 2 to 4 hearts earned. It’s tempting to use Tea and Cake sets here, but it’s not worth it in the long run. Those tea sets are of much greater use in Story Events so just hang onto them for now and do your duels like normal.

Both Story and Duel Lucky Times are exactly what it says on the tin. Double hearts for however you earn them! This doesn’t happen very often and usually near the end of the event for that little last push you might need to get some extra ones.

Bonuses

So there’s three different ways to earn items in this event, Early Clears, Ranking, and the actual item chain itself.

Early Clears are the timed ones. Certain amount of hearts in a certain amount of time. Usually the first Lucky Time will fall before the first Early Clear is up so they do give you a chance to get it easily enough if you’re playing smart. There’s usually two or three, with the first being a card and a story to go with it. The other two could be attire or a background. Depends on the event but all three are achievable without dropping a lot of money if you plan out your Lucky Times.

Ranking bonuses are a little tighter on this one. I’m pretty sure Collection Events see a top 200 for the first tier instead of 300 like Story Events. It makes it a little more competitive and harder to get into. If you’re just starting out and playing free, I wouldn’t aim for here just yet. You’re not going to be completely set up to get here unless you drop a lot of money. Which I’m seeing more and more people do instead of just playing the way the event is designed. But to each their own.

The item chain is the list of things you get for turning in your hearts. Stories, attire, items, Lin and crystals all show up here! You aren’t competing with anyone for these items and just earn them on your own as you play. It’s a good habit to look through and see who’s stories they’re giving, because it’s usually only 5-7 guys included in the event, and where they sit. Ray and Sirius will almost always be the last two stories because they’re the most popular characters in Japan so they make players work for them. Unreleased guys cycle through on whether they get a story or not and they’re usually the first stories you get. The other released guys are peppered through the list in various places. You will see a lot of repeat of some characters because of their popularity in Japan which I know a lot of English players don’t like because the popularity here doesn’t exactly echo what it is there but we can’t do anything about it since all the stories are already made and just being translated.

Items

Chapter Tickets. I can’t stress it enough, these are like pure gold for this event. You want to use them on Lucky Times to boost and get you as many hearts as you can get. They are a little harder to come by since the game doesn’t give them to you on the login cycle, but you can still get them. Like I mentioned before, you get 5 for finishing a route. The Secret Tea Party will also give you 1. The event itself will give you 1 or 2 as you turn in hearts. Or you can buy them from the item shop for 100 crystals. Consider doing this if you have say, 4 because it’ll be a good way to round you out and get you through another part.

Hearts in the shop are also a good thing in a pinch. Say you’re only one or two away from getting that next 10 to turn in. If you’ve got the Lin, use it to buy them and get over that line. But just make sure you’ll have enough Lin to get through an Avatar check if you’re only getting the normal attire. It would suck to get stuck on a check because you spent too much Lin on hearts in the shop. The ones you earn through reading the story are worth so much more because you don’t have to pay to get them and you get more for your money. So use these as a last resort.

Unless you have a lot of Lin. If you have more than enough, or are playing a route you already have the attire items for, spend the Lin, get 10 hearts a day. But this is really more for people who’ve been playing for a while and have amassed a lot of Lin that just sits there normally.

Types of Collection Events

So far we’ve seen two, one where it’s the normal one like what I’ve described up above and another called a Touch Event.

This one runs essentially the same but this time when you turn in hearts, you get to tap a guy of your choice and you get different lines from them with every heart you tap! Two of them will be voiced lines and the rest are just text on the screen.

There’s three stages for each guy, meaning you have to turn in 30 hearts in order to ‘complete’ him. In the Touch Event we had before, after you finish all three stages, you got a chibi of that guy. Once you complete all three stages, you pick another guy and get new lines and a new chibi!

Fun fact, they don’t restrict how many chibis you can get of one guy. So if you want more than one of your best boy, just go back to him and complete another three stages. They’ll keep giving them if you have the hearts to trade.

When they did this one, however, there were extra bonuses for touching all of the guys and for getting all of the guys to all three stages of completion. Since we’ve only seen this event once, I don’t know if they’re all like that but it’s something to keep in mind. Just make sure you read all the notes about an event and the bonuses so you know what you need to do to get them!

-

I think that about sums up everything I have to say about how to get through Collection Events. So far we’ve only really seen these events paired with route drops, but there will come a time when they aren’t paired up. There’s a lot of them in the Japanese version of the app and there’s only so many routes. At some point, it’ll get harder to earn hearts unless you’re still playing routes even if you’ve done them before.

When Kyle’s route drops, if there’s more questions feel free to shoot them my way or even before then. I’m happy to share what the last year has taught me. Collection events are a little easier to save money on because all you have to do is play the game like you have been, but just a little smarter!

#ikemen revolution #ikerev #collection events #hope this helps anyone that needs it! #and good luck on whatever event they drop with Kyle! #fixed the formatting! #tips and tricks

[theconservativebrief]

“I feel no nostalgia for our childhood: It was full of violence.”

So says narrator Elena Greco near the beginning of Elena Ferrante’s My Brilliant Friend. The bestselling novel is now an HBO series, and the screen adaptation drives home one of the book’s core messages: For Elena (Elisa del Genio), her best friend/double/nemesis Lila Cerullo (Ludovica Nasti), and all the children growing up with them in working-class postwar Naples, violence undergirds every interaction. (Spoilers for the first two episodes of the show, and mild spoilers for the books, follow.)

It’s not just the violence of the men in the neighborhood, who beat their wives and battle each other for dominance. As the show’s first two episodes, which aired on Sunday and Monday, make clear, Elena and Lila are involved too, fighting with boys and, later, conducting a war of words with one another that stretches across decades.

“While men were always getting furious, they calmed down in the end,” Ferrante writes; “women, who appeared to be silent, acquiescent, when they were angry flew into a rage that had no end.”

My Brilliant Friend and the other three novels in Ferrante’s wildly popular Neapolitan series have been hailed as modern-day feminist classics, telling the often forgotten stories of girls and women. But as the HBO series makes clear, these are not uplifting tales of female empowerment. The story of Elena and Lila is a story of friendship, yes, but also of hate, and of anger that’s not always righteous. The novels, and now the show, remind us of an uncomfortable truth: Girls and women have always been just as capable of violence as men and boys. It’s just that for a long time, nobody was watching.

HBO’s My Brilliant Friend begins, like the novel, with Elena, now a woman in her sixties, receiving a call from Lila’s adult son: Lila has disappeared. The story then flashes back to the 1950s, when Elena and Lila met as girls living in a drab Naples neighborhood.

The Neapolitan novels center on the evolution of Elena and Lila’s friendship across time and place, and the novels are famous in part for the way they probe a complex and tumultuous relationship between two women. But the novels — and, presumably, the series, which so far hews to them very closely — make clear that even as the girls become women and grow apart and together again, they are never far from the influence of their Naples neighborhood and its feuds, both petty and serious.

As many reviewers have already pointed out, the ever-present violence of this neighborhood is evident from the show’s first episode. The streets where Elena and Lila play and the shops where their parents buy food are controlled by small-time criminals, and their power struggles are a constant undercurrent in both the show and books.

In part, the violence of Ferrante’s stories mirrors the real-life rise of organized crime in Naples beginning in the mid-1950s. And, in part, it’s a kind of anti-nostalgic approach, as Elena might put it, to a coming-of-age story. Ferrante shows us childhood as it is for many children: not idyllic, but often frightening and sometimes bloody.

In the first episode, the neighborhood squabbles turn physical again and again. After the carpenter Alfredo Peluso publicly criticizes local strongman Don Achille Carracci (by yelling about him in the street), Carracci drags him out of a funeral and slams him against a wall. Women feud too — Melina Cappuccio and Lidia Sarratore get into a fight over Cappuccio’s love for Sarratore’s husband, and Cappuccio ends up tumbling down the stairs.

The neighborhood children, meanwhile, play out their own versions of their parents’ quarrels. When Lila beats Alfonso Carracci in a school competition, his brother attacks her. And in the episode’s climactic scene, Enzo Scanno (also bested by Lila in the school contest) and his friends hurl stones at Lila, knocking her over and bloodying her head.

In the show’s second episode, violence erupts in the Greco household, as Elena’s mother beats her savagely with an umbrella for skipping school. When Elena’s father comes home, her mother demands he beat Elena too: “You don’t even know how to hit your daughter,” she says, challenging his masculinity. He snaps, savagely slapping Elena while shouting at her mother — the whole episode is a power struggle between the two parents, who have been arguing about whether Elena should be allowed to take the admissions test for middle school. In the end, she is — but her parents’ battle leaves her with a face full of bruises.

The language of the show is violent even when its action is not (the actors speak Italian and the Neapolitan dialect, and the English subtitles draw heavily from the English translation of the novel by Ann Goldstein). Lila describes Don Achille as having “sucked the blood” out of another man, presumably with his predatory lending practices. And Maestra Oliviero, Elena and Lila’s teacher, warns the girls that they must prove themselves against their male schoolmates intellectually: “If we don’t start showing the boys now that you’re like them, better actually, they’ll crush you.” In the context of the neighborhood, this feels both literally and figuratively true.

The violence around the girls clearly affects them, and not only when they’re being actively bloodied. As Hillary Kelly writes at Vulture, “Elena Greco and Lila Cerullo’s loud, crowded lives are small and insulated, and they’re always seconds away from a tragedy around which the entire town will gather to gawp.” Their world, as she puts it, “clamors and echoes with shrieks, bellows, and the sounds of violence.”

In director Saverio Costanzo’s imagining, even the colors of the neighborhood hint at the emotional effects of constant violence — everything is dull, dusty, and dark. The dangers of their neighborhood limit Elena and Lila’s lives, and seem to limit even the spectrum of their vision.

But the girls aren’t passive victims of the violence around them. They’re active participants, as when Lila hurls stones back at the boys who attack her — and Elena steps in to help. Lila isn’t merely defending herself in this scene; she’s fighting back with gusto. The whole episode, as Sonia Saraiya writes at Vanity Fair, “seems to have built the scene around showcasing her indomitable will.”

Even when they’re not fighting, the girls are always watching violence unfold. When the adults in their world beat each other up, Elena and Lila look on in open fascination. Del Genio and Nasti, both newcomers, can communicate a lot with a gaze. Elena is more of a blank slate, her wide eyes taking everything in — Saraiya calls her “open and vulnerable, like a cracked-open raw egg.” Lila, meanwhile, has already developed an opinion on — even an appreciation for — the violence of her neighborhood. As she watches Cappuccio and Sarratore scream at each other, a smile plays across her lips, though it disappears when the fight turns physical.

Later, Lila appears to lay a trap for Elena, luring her to skip school in the hopes that Elena’s parents will get angry and bar her from taking the middle school test. Lila must know that her friend will probably get a beating, and yet she’s willing to take that risk. It won’t be the last time Lila tries to manipulate someone else to get what she wants, regardless of the consequences.

If the show continues to stick close to the books — one season per novel is planned — Lila and Elena will experience, in ever more serious ways, the brutality of their neighborhood. They’ll survive domestic and sexual violence, and their clashes with the men who rule the neighborhood will come back to haunt them in devastating ways.

They won’t commit the same kinds of violence they experience, but they will wage other kinds of warfare. This future is evident from the very beginning of the show. As Sophie Gilbert notes at the Atlantic, we learn as the series opens that Lila hasn’t just quietly disappeared. She’s vandalized her own past, cutting herself out of all family photographs, even those of her and her son as a young child.

Elena, meanwhile, isn’t sad to hear that her old friend is missing. She’s angry, and as revenge, she decides to write the story of their childhood together. The very narration we’re listening to is a form of emotional violence, the forcible documentation of someone who wanted to be erased.

Part of the popularity of the Neapolitan novels has to do with their close and clear-eyed examination of women’s inner lives. Men’s thoughts and feelings have always been presumed to be an interesting subject for literary fiction, but women’s stories have frequently found themselves shunted into a variety of genres that tend to get less acclaim.

Ferrante’s work has been groundbreaking in that it has been received around the world as a literary triumph, even as it chronicles the lives of people often pushed to the side in art and history. At the Washington Post, Alyssa Rosenberg recommends watching My Brilliant Friend alongside the Godfather movies in order to appreciate “what we gain when we see the world both from the center and the margins.”

What we learn from My Brilliant Friend, though, is that the margins can be just as brutal as the center, if in different ways. Ferrante pulls back the curtain on the inner lives of girls and women, and what she reveals is dark — just as dark as anything perpetrated by men.

“Lila appeared in my life in first grade and immediately impressed me because she was very bad,” Ferrante writes. And Lila is bad — not badass, though she is that too, not plucky or feisty or spirited, but hateful and spiteful and sometimes cruel.

Costanzo’s adaptation makes even clearer what already came through in the books: that one of Ferrante’s greatest skills lies in showing us the full range of women’s emotions and all they are capable of — love and friendship, but also destruction.

A certain kind of feminist criticism once focused on whether a particular artistic creation was empowering to women. (The Onion perfectly skewered this tradition in 2003, with the headline “Women Now Empowered By Everything A Woman Does.”) More recently, female characters in fiction have been given the freedom to be “unlikable.” (Earlier this year, Vox’s Tara Burton deconstructed the entire question of likability.) What Elena Ferrante has done is to create characters who are hateable — who sometimes hate each other and sometimes deserve to be hated — and to remind us that women are worthy of depiction in art not because they are better than men but because they, too, are human.

Original Source -> My Brilliant Friend pulls back the curtain on women’s lives. What it reveals is dark and violent.

via The Conservative Brief

#IFTTT #The Conservative Brief

[fitzonomy]

Comics, Pornography, and Communication: also, a discussion of why *Men* suck.

First, notice how I typed out *Men* up there. It is capitalized. There are asterisks around the word. I don’t describe myself as a “social justice warrior” because the label, to me, signifies lip service, mob mentality, and a lack of critical thinking. Second, notice how I qualified that definition with “to me.” It’s subjective. It’s about my experience with the term and the people who’ve I encountered who use it as an identity. Do I think social justice is bad? No. Do I think wanting social justice, equity, and all those buzz words is wrong? Nope. But do I think the world is mostly grey areas? Heck golly gosh, I do.

*Men* (to me) is meant to signify major societal trends, norms, and expectations that are grounded in patriarchal, misogynistic, and ableist rules, environments, and scripts that are written for *Men,* by *Men,* between *Men,* and with *Men.* *Men* are those who think the world works a certain way, so suck it up because that’s just the way the world is. *Men* (In. My. Experience.) have zero interest in critical thinking unless it is done so in a way that benefits them and other Men. Often times, *Men* engage in the lowest threshold of critical thinking or want to employ rhetorical techniques/classical logic to whatever is being discussed. *Men* is not limited to cis-men. This is important but not relevant to the following discussion. I’M ONLY GOING TO BE DISCUSSING AMERICAN COMICS. YES, I KNOW THE FIRST RECORDED SUPERHERO COMIC WAS MADE IN THE 1800s SOMEWHERE IN EUROPE. So, let me tell you that this entire position that I’m about to present is NOT about:

1. The history, merit, or discussion of why Comix (different from comics, for historical reasons) is important. Underground Comix is important for many reasons. There have been dissertations written on the subject. I’m not about to do that here. 2. Whether or not the goal of satire was/is achieved with Underground Comix. 3. Whether Underground Comix is “problematic.” I.e. was/is it sexist, ableist, racist, bigoted, and whatever other problems they could have. Again, another dissertation topic. Again, again, aaaagain: this is about my individual experience working in a comic book shop. Don’t act like I’m drafting a treatise on some objective truth that’s floating aimlessly around in a vacuum. Go watch Netflix. Eat pizza. This isn’t that deep. It’s me griping about things from a particular point of view. Some background: I’ve worked at a comic book shop in a small, midwestern city for almost five years now. The shop has been here going on over 20+ years. It’s the only game in town when it comes to comic books. Historically, this wasn’t the case but other shops didn’t adapt so, uh, they died off. Comics is a strange business to be in because while it is technically a bookshop, the industry came from a place of fun and general absurdity that was meant to be throwaway material for kids (especially the target market, young boys) to waste money on (hence, why Golden Age stuff, any of it really, is usually worth a little something--the newsprint wasn’t meant to be durable, so kids would throw them away, use it for drawing paper, etc.). Comics had been around before the Golden Age, but yanno, it’s called a Golden Age for a reason--it is the era in which comics became introduced as “suitable” for mainstream consumer consumption. I mean, we could argue on other reasons but that’s neither here nor there. Comic books, graphic novels, and comic strip utilize sequential art. Sequential art is a specialized term. Within the definition itself, the requirement of narrative is implicitly built into the term. There is no room for debate here. If a story is not being told, a body of work can be classified as art but it is not sequential. Art can tell a story, sure, but a square is a rectangle but a rectangle isn’t a square. I run into a wide variety of people because of the strangeness of the product we sell. We’ve got readers (like myself), we’ve got collectors, we’ve got beginner readers, we’ve got artists (like me), we’ve got writers (like me), and we’ve got people who “haven’t been to a comic store in ages and, boy!, is it sure different than when I was young!” And, yes, we have the certified perverts. Once, I found out one of our customers was a registered child sex offender. I politely told my boss that if the person in question wasn’t banned from the store, I was quitting. As with all stores, as times change, so does business practice. One must adapt to the changes that are happening around them or they have to have a big enough, steady clientele to support them. This comic book shop, in particular, did not and does not have a large enough, regular clientele base that spends enough money for us to keep doing things the way it always had been. These are just facts. In the past, this store was ran in such a way that it was a dying business but the current owner would put their own money into it in order to keep it afloat. At that time, the store allowed some subscribers (note: to my knowledge, all cis-gender men) to order exclusively from publishers like Boundless Comics (publisher who specializes in “sexy, cool comics for adults”) with no advance payment. Which means if they never came to pick up their stuff, we were stuck with the responsibility to sell it because, well, we already paid for it. I don’t think I have to make a Venn diagram to convince anyone that the overlap between deadbeats (for our subscription service--basically, we never heard from someone ever again) and these men was pretty much two circles just a bit off-center from one another. These were not comics we could put out to be sold because they never would be. In over 20 years, our numbers have shown that Adult/XXX/Mature comics don’t sell well off the rack regularly. We do have one or two customers back from Ye Olden Days who still have subscriptions to mature comics, but they never look around. They never try out something new. They buy the comics they ordered because they wouldn’t get them any other way. Both of them are strongly against buying things on the internet, so my guess is we’re they’re only option. I wasn’t around during the time in which “boxes were kept under the counter” for “special comics.” Today: About a month ago, an older man (because all of the customers who ask for the “boxes under the counter” are older) came into the store. He looked around. He came up to the counter and asked me where the Underground Comix were. I showed him where we kept our collection of Underground Comix. He said that wasn’t what he was looking for. Did we have the “boxes under the counter.” Now, understand, I’ve been told about all of this because we don’t have it anymore but I needed to know the store’s history. Fair. I told him that we do not and have not in many years. But, when people ask me for Those Boxes, I know what they’re asking for. Not all of it was satirical Underground Comix. So, they usually stumble when I tell them that, no we don’t. This guy stumbled. I could assume a number of reasons as to why he did so, but it really doesn’t do any good. So, I try to ask a number of questions to find something else they might like to try. The conversation goes like this: Me: Are you looking for a comic or graphic novel with explicit sexual content? Him: Yes. Me: Okay, I can definitely suggest Saga and Sex Criminals.

At this point, I pull out the first trades of both and show the explicit sexual content in both. I mention the art, the story, and the writing. Sequential art is divided into four elements: design, drawing, caricature, and writing. Design, drawing, and writing are usually the most salient elements to a lay reader. Caricature has a lot to do with symbolic representation--how does one exaggerate an element of X in order to represent X? But some people lay people are interested in this element because of the comical effect it can play in a comic story. Him: No. Not like that. Me: What is missing from this then? Him: Something more adult. Me: Would you like explicit sexual content with more graphic violence? Him: Yeah, that sounds about right. Me: Okay, I’ve got Crossed.

!WARNING WARNING WARNING! THE LINK I’VE PROVIDED IS TO THE WIKIPEDIA PAGE WHICH IS ABOUT THE TAMEST RESOURCE FOR WHAT CROSSED IS THAT I KNOW OF. DO NOT LOOK INTO THIS COMIC IF EXTREME VIOLENCE, GRAPHIC DEPICTIONS OF DEATH AND DISMEMBERMENT, INCEST, BESTIALITY, RAPE, BLASPHEMY OF RELIGIONS, AND A WHOLE HOST OF OTHER THINGS REMOTELY BOTHER YOU. NOT EVEN TRIGGER--REMOTELY. BOTHER. So, yeah, I feel like I’d picked out a good contender considering. Him: No. Not like this. But, hey, wanna know something about Crossed? Everybody is a target for wanton humiliation, suffering, and all sorts of horrible things! Is this something I’m praising? No. It’s just a fact of the comic. And an important fact to know when guy says to me: Him: Well, the old Underground Comix I used to read were more sophisticated with the satire, like the sex in it was about humor with having sex with women. Me: So, you’re looking for comics about humorous sexual encounters that are also explicit? And as I start suggesting comics, he interrupted. Him: No, not like that. More like... *he pulls out a Robert Crumb collection we have and thumbs through it* that. The funny stuff, yanno? The picture in question (I won’t link it, because it is upsetting, as will be my description of it) is just in Crumb’s style--pretty distinctive--and it’s one panel of a skinny, naked man with a sizeable erection. He’s bent over backwards, his hips bent such that his back is practically parallel with the floor of the drawing and his erection (which, if I recall correctly is something like 1/5-1/6 of the height of the page) is pretty close to perpendicular with the floor. One of his hands is wrapped around a nude woman’s throat, the drawing exaggerating the woman’s body parts as if she were being squeezed through tube--the head is ballooned and her neck stretches out to her shoulders. her arms are ramrod straight leading down to outstretched hands. Her legs are equally straightened, bent ninety degrees at the hips. There are motion lines to indicate that the man is forcibly shoving the woman onto his dick over and over again. By her throat. He’s got a pretty happy expression. She does not. Please, read the part where I explain what this thing I’m writing is NOT. Because it is a grey area if you know enough about history and context. Divorced of context, it’s pretty disgusting. I’ll just say that outright. So, if we use the four elements of sequential art to think about what story is being told and how it’s being told, there are things I can understand. The design is good (lots of sharp angles). The caricature is good (Crumb is great with exaggerated forms, whether I like his style or not is irrelevant). The drawing is in Crumb’s style which I can understand why people like his art. So, that leaves the writing. It is wordless but there’s still a story being told. Me and this guy were have a disconnect about what kind of story he wanted to read. Cut to today, about a month after this. It seemed like he hadn’t internalized anything we’d gone over because he had similar questions. At one point, he finally picked up a book and bought it. Which led me to writing this humongous post for the last four hours (it’s been busy today!). Because the guy wasn’t asking for pornography. I’ve definitely straight up told people before we don’t sell pornographic material here. Besides, how we define porn depends on the era. To me, I define it as material that was created with the intention to arouse, stimulate, and to be used as an aid for sexual activity AND someone wants to consume it for said purposes. But, that’s not a definition that would fit all pornographic material. The guy was (again, my perspective. Why I have to keep saying that is important here in a moment) asking for satirical material where misogyny was humorous. Now, if you were to ask him to communicate what he wanted, I guess good luck on getting that answer. I’ve tried. I don’t think he could, to be quite honest because that’s how *Men* are (hey! I used it again). This guy is a *Man* and his answers to me when I probe are, “How it used to be, just how things are,” and the like. The comic book industry is usually fraught with the same problems regular prose books are, the big topics being censorship and purity politics. It’s not as bad as, let’s say, the 1960s and 1970s but there are still problems. Even books for readers of all ages come under scrutiny and are banned from some libraries and schools (Raina Telgemeier’s Drama, for example). To censor any material is a very murky grey area for me. To say that someone cannot create material because it contains material that I am not comfortable with is even murkier because, usually, I’m presented with these hypotheticals in the form of loaded questions (”So, have you stopped bad habit X?” which doesn’t allow me to engage in how I qualify my own habits); complex questions (”What is the legal age of consent to sexual activity?” assumes a LOT of things about legality, age of consent, consent, and sexual activity without consideration to context, to say the least); false dilemmas, suggestive questions, leading questions, and... *takes a deep breath* *exhales* Listen, there’s just a lot of things that make a lot of issues super murky and grey for me. That’s not to say I don’t have opinions and personal/societal biases that sway me toward one end or the other of a polemic (I’m human. We all do it).

When I say, “I hate *Men,*” it is hatred directed towards the skewed power dynamics and socialization that I’m cemented into (through no consent or fault of my own), that allows a *Man* to think (without a second thought) about showing someone the picture I described and not worrying about what he’s communicating. About what the comic is communicating. Let’s pretend that he knows the historical context and importance of Underground Comix. How does he know that I know those things? I mean, I do, but this guy doesn’t know that. “But, Ash!” you argue. “You literally asked him to show you an example!” My friend, there’s no shortage of Underground Comix either from Crumb himself or in similar style that showcases supposedly satirical humor where “battle of the sexes” comes into play. To show someone that image with no knowledge of what the other person knows is a little dicey imho But it sucks! I have to be okay with him showing me that! I asked for an example and I got it. In his mind, it was a smooth communicative exchange. Request for information? Information given! Because of *Men,* I have to watch the way I approach wanting to talk about this subject because I might become “emotional” or I might be accused of, gasp, showing bias! (Newsflash: we’re humans. WE ALL HAVE BIASES. If you aren’t willing to talk about and challenge them then THAT’S a problem. Another story for another day, I digress). And it’s a shame because I know this *Man* isn’t wanting to consume stories where rape is funny because he’s interested in engaging with content that is historically important but because it was created in the context of some socially-acceptable horrible crap there’s some interesting discussion to be had. No, my bet is the thought process looks like: “Heh. Yeah, I know that feeling. Sometimes you just want to have a girl ride you but she just doesn’t know how to slam that pussy down right, so you gotta help her!” “lol yeah sometimes you just wish pussy would magically work your dick into oblivion without you having to worry about the woman that’s attached to it! am I right, y’all?” laugh out loud satire right there someone give me my own netflix show (watch someone take this section out of context sigh) And, honestly, I don’t know where I’m going with this. I didn’t have a thesis or anything. Just me rambling. RIP moblrs

#long post #rip those of you on mobile #ash talks comics #it gets graphic #trigger warnings all around #in abundance #I mention #rape cw #violence cw #basically