#so yeah the problem is me

[inkskinned]

hey btw if you're in the USA at  2:20 p.m. ET on Wednesday, Oct. 4, they're testing the emergency broadcast system. your phone is probably going to make a really loud noise, even if it's on silent. there's a backup date on the 11th if they need to postpone it.

if you're not in a safe situation and have an extra phone, you should turn that phone completely off beforehand.

additionally, if you're like me, and are easily startled; i recommend treating it like a party. have a countdown or something. be surrounded by your loved ones. take the actions you personally need to take to make yourself safe.

i have already seen mockery towards any person who feels nervous about this. for the record, it completely, completely valid to have "emergency broadcast sounds" be an anxiety trigger. do not let other people make fun of you for that. emergency sounds are legitimately engineered to make us take action; those of us with high levels of anxiety and/or neurodivergence are already pre-disposed to have a Bad Time. sometimes it is best to acknowledge that the situation will be triggering for some, and to prepare for that; rather than just saying "well that's stupid, it's just a test."

"loud scary sound time" isn't like, my favorite thing, but we can at least try to prevent some additional anxiety by preparing for it. maybe get yourself a cake? noise cancelling headphones? the new hozier album? whatever helps. love u, hope you're okay. we are gonna ride it out together.

#watching ppl go from being like ''support neurodivergent ppl~~!" #to being like ''if this is going to give u a panic attack ur fuckken stupid'' #like..... gets me #yeah man. i know im going to be triggered by it . in the old fashioned term. it is GOING to give me a panic attack. it's pretty much certai #and i shouldn't have to tell u about what i have survived for you to be okay with that. #you can just trust that i ALSO don't want me to react to it. i'm not gonna be having a FUN time. #dismissing that bc you think it's stupid.... like is the whole problem. #these sounds are workshopped by entire teams of people to get you to pay attention and move quickly. #they arent meant to be fun and exciting. #OBVIOUSLY it's gonna set ppl off. #but yeah there's something so fuckken demeaning about ppl being like. well that trigger isn't valid bc u haven't undergone X #dude i have ptsd bc i was abused as a child. like plain and simple. the fact im 30 and afraid of the dark tells you how bad it was. #i shouldn't have to ask u for permission to be mentally ill. #the reason it's a fucking disorder and not a fucking choice is that I DO NOT CONTROL IT. #like how is it any different from when ppl are like ''oh public speaking isn't that scary'' like FOR YOU #for YOU this isn't scary. now if i could fucking eat my own amygdala...

[transmascissues]

“trans men don’t have any real safety concerns to worry about” i can’t wear a mask when i go into public bathrooms even though i’m higher risk and bathrooms are some of the easiest places to get sick because i don’t reliably pass when my facial hair is covered and i can’t risk not passing when i use the men’s room, but i also can’t just use the women’s room for safety anymore because i don’t reliably pass as either binary gender anymore. so my only options are to risk getting sick, take my chances with the consequences of not passing, or just never use the bathroom in public (which has its own health risks).

and today, it almost didn’t even matter that i was putting myself in danger to ensure that i passed because, thanks to a faulty lock and a man who didn’t think to knock, i came very close to having my half-naked body exposed to a bathroom full of cis men. if i hadn’t been holding my coat on my lap because there was nowhere in the stall to put it, every single guy waiting in the (very crowded) bathroom would’ve seen that i didn’t have a dick. how well do you think that would’ve gone for me? my money’s on Not Well At All.

#it took me a solid hour to stop shaking after #like yeah maybe the guy who opened the door would’ve have done anything but what about all the other guys? #i feel like the chances that None of those guys would’ve had a problem with trans people is pretty low #i’m so fucking lucky it didn’t happen but even coming that close was Terrifying #starting to use the men’s room consistently is…a time #but when i do it right i get less weird looks than in the women’s room so it’s not like there’s a better option #transandrophobia #transandromisia #transmisandry #virilmisia #virilphobia #anti transmasculinity #transmascphobia #trans men #transmascs

[chiricat]

ryomina demons are winning

#does anyone here like them idk. theyre funny #putting off finishing p3re to draw these so i don't have to be sad just yet #cat’s art #ryomina #ryoji mochizuki #makoto yuki #minato arisato #p3 #persona 3 #p3re #p3 reload #sorry for traditional sketch stuff... idk i just feel like i do better on paper even tho its literally the same style #like i can just get the lines better on paper. i think my brush is probably too thick digitally if i'm having this problem lol #makoto makes me so emo u guys have no idea. i didn't quite get this guy in the beginning but now... #full force understanding of a character. hes. he :( (incoherent sobbing) #tag ramble again SORRY I UEBRO4Y39NRMFMT #oh yeah the period thing going around is so funny. PERSONA 3 PERIOD SIMULATOR

[nightlocked-in]

“peeta is bisexual” you guys are losing the vision. peeta isn’t even straight. katniss INVENTED sexuality for him. whatever katniss identifies as, he’s like “yeah, i’ll take that one” no questions asked

#katnissexual #i’m joking btw #and i agree with yall #he says you’ve ruined all other women for me #yeah twink we know #the hunger games #katniss everdeen #thg #nightlocked-in #everlark #peeta mellark #hunger games headcanon #hunger games incorrect quotes #thg incorrect quotes #bisexual peeta #peeta what’s your sexuality? #idk #what do u mean u don’t know #i’ve never thought about it #well i mean… do you like guys? do u like girls? #he thinks for a second…. girl #just one #katniss he says #i’m convinced in modern au’s when he’s dating someone else he just pictures katniss when fucking and then feels horribly guilty for it later #peeta why don’t you look at me during sex? #huh? oh glimmer uh… i just get distracted by how uh… good it feels. yeah that haha #katniss was his first love in every thing and not only was she his first love she was his ONLY love #so he’s never even considered being attracted to girls besides her #so when he tries to date he finds girls that are objectively attractive but on a scale of 1 to katniss they are still 1’s to him #and that never stops being a problem

[harmonictechnicality]

Steve wakes up around three or four in the morning almost every night. He’s always careful getting out of bed. Small movements, slow footsteps. Minimal bones cracking. Doesn’t want to wake Eddie. Not that he needs to be this careful because his boyfriend could sleep through several natural disasters (and if someone bothered to wake him in this scenario, he’d put an impotency curse on them or some equally fucked-up shit). 

But that’s one of the reasons why they work. Not because of the sad-dick curse thing. They just exist on different sides of the scale. The raging insomniac and the deepest sleeper known to mankind. It balances out in the weirdest possible way.

Still… he’s always careful. Can never be too careful.

Steve doesn’t really do much when he wakes up at this ungodly hour. He sort of walks around their duplex, drinks a glass of water, opens a window to breathe in that pre-sunrise air. It fills his lungs up differently than normal air. At least, it feels like it does.

Like less people are breathing it in. Like he can take up space without feeling selfish. The logic doesn’t really add up but whatever. Concepts like logic and science are overrated at four in the morning.

After another lap around the place, he slides back into the covers, drapes an arm over Eddie’s waist. His t-shirt is rumpled up to his chest, so Steve is met with linen-warm skin. His fingers curve into Eddie’s sides, pulling himself closer. 

Steve yawns, breathing out all of his pre-sunrise air. Inhales the scent of his boyfriend instead. Smiles like an idiot into the pillow because it’s totally a fair trade.

And Eddie… well, he doesn’t even budge - doesn’t even stir when Steve settles in next to him. He just continues to wheeze through his nose, mouth slightly open. Not quite a snore, but Steve will probably tease him about it in the morning regardless. 

This right here. This makes Steve’s shitty sleep cycle worth it.

The sun pokes through the window blinds. Eddie pokes Steve’s cheek. Too much poking going on for Steve who definitely didn’t get enough sleep, per usual.

“You got up last night.” Eddie mumbles, still lazily poking him. 

“How’d you know?”

“Bed felt different.”

Oh. The way Eddie says it. A crash of honesty. His voice sounds weathered, unused from sleeping. Barely awake. It sort of hits Steve’s heart like a crime he didn’t even know he was capable of committing. 

Honestly, he doesn’t get why last night would be any different. Steve gets up most nights, not just last night. But Eddie looks particularly wounded by this (new) realization, so Steve probably shouldn’t point that out right now. Maybe in the afternoon when Eddie is more alert. Less… offended.

“Well, I’m back now.” Steve grabs Eddie’s index finger, the one poking him, and places it over his own lips. Bites at it gently till Eddie pulls away in protest. He’s smiling as he swears. Lets out a string of half-hearted threats about how he’s gonna pour Steve’s hair supplies down the sink for such a vicious attack. 

It’s a little irresistible when Eddie gets like this. When he’s the pouty one instead of Steve. All he can think to do is reach out, curl his hand underneath Eddie’s chin and pull him in. Eddie moves so easily, gives up his one-sided fight long enough to kiss Steve. Hands running up his back, legs hooking around Steve’s thighs.

Drowsy, morning kisses are so good. So, so good. Their lips feel heavier, their motions feel thicker. Every touch is guided by pure need. Steve fucking needs this, to feel Eddie curving into him, arms framing his own, groaning every damn time they break away. It all makes Steve feel needed too. Needed by the guy who changed the trajectory of his life by asking Steve to ‘hang out or something’ two years ago. 

Or Something turned out to be absolutely everything.

“New rule.” Eddie huffs, drags his lips down Steve’s jaw. “For every hour you spend awake during the night, you owe me.”

Steve laughs. “I owe you, huh?”

“Mhmm. You owe me an extra hour of wallowing in bed together in the morning.”

“What about work?”

“The hours will have to rollover, I guess. Accrue interest.” Eddie lifts up from Steve’s neck, eyebrows raised. Clearly having too much fun with this. “We can hash out the details over coffee and burnt toast.”

Typically, Steve would play along, continue the little comedy routine that Eddie starts up. But he’s so damn tired from the lack of sleep and early fucking wake-up call. So instead, he tugs Eddie back down by his collar and whispers, “Whatever you say, baby.”

Because that’s what it boils down to. He’d do anything for Eddie to kiss him this deep, till their lips blister and their jaws ache. Steve would give every fragment of lovesick happiness in his heart, just to hear the way Eddie says his name all breathy and raw. 

He can’t say that out loud, dear god no. Eddie would mock his ass into next century. So Steve just hums into Eddie’s mouth, twists the collar of his shirt enough to permanently wrinkle it. They’re verging into that gray area between cable-approved makeout sessions and dry humping till the alarm goes off. If there wasn’t an alarm to worry about, Steve would already have Eddie’s boxers already his ankles and moaning his name the way he likes it best.

Whoever invented alarm clocks are the ultimate boner-killer.

Steve ducks his head into the crook of Eddie’s neck, lays a few quick kisses on top of his shoulder. Hopes that translates to, ‘I wanna suck you off till there’s nothing left, but I’m a boring fucking adult with a boring fucking job.’ 

The translation must be clear enough because Eddie rolls off of him and heads to the bathroom. Seems just as grumpy about it as Steve. Good. They can be cranky together.

When he comes back out, they get ready for their respective work shifts. Steve looks over, watches Eddie struggle with a tangled portion of his hair, before giving up.  Accepting defeat way faster than Steve ever would. “Uh, Eddie?” He tries his best to hide his snickering through the question.

“Yeah?”

“Why does it matter if I wake up sometimes?” Okay. Most times.

“You’re gone.” Eddie shrugs. “Simple as that.”

The reaction is too mellow for Eddie though. Shrugging and dismissiveness? Nah. He’s downplaying the shit out of whatever he’s feeling, and Steve’s not having it.

“What do you mean it’s simple?”

“It’s just… I don’t know. Doesn’t seem fair.” Eddie checks the clock, then sighs. “I want more time.”

More time? More time with Steve or more time in general? Either way, it doesn’t add up. They’re young - they have all the fucking time they could ever want. Also, they live together and have all the same friends. It’s not exactly a logical theory.

Then again, neither is Steve’s ‘pre-sunrise air supply’ theory. None of it makes sense. But at least they’re here. Wanting fresh air and each other. That’s enough logic for a lifetime.

“Hey.” Steve walks over and takes Eddie’s hand. He taps over his ring finger, the one that symbolizes something they can’t have. Not now, not in this society. Still. It means something. So he stares intently at it, rubs over the place where a ring might sit. Thinks that Eddie would pick out something bold. Something gaudy and perfectly him.

More time. Steve gets it, he does. He releases Eddie’s hand and nods. Smiles.

“I’ll steal us as much time as I can, Eddie Munson.”

#steddie #steddie fic #steve harrington #eddie munson #this is the first little thing I've written since submitting my Big Bang draft #it’s a lot softer than my normal stuff but hey #insomnia writing do be like that sometimes #(so yeah - I projected my sleep problems onto Steve) #(and yeah - I projected my tangly hair onto Eddie) #let me liveeeeeeee

[waterghostype]

shit postings

#ninjago #kai smith #cole brookstone #zane julien #jay walker #jaya #ninjago jaya #kai ninjago #aphid’s ninjashits #im sure this has been done but ive had this idea for so long #also i just realized i messed up kais scar position in the first drawng #oops! #he was forced to acknowledge the rebooted love triangle #imo the love triangle sucks total ass but it’s also like peak comedy in a meta way #like yeah misogyny and badly wirtten romance but i’s so absurdly stupid you cant help but laugh #also looking at the comment section for the jay kai fight gave me brain damage omg #like ok i have problems with the way kai was treated in regards to nyas seaboundification #but ppl keep acting like jay shouldnt have cared as much as he did which is ??? dude #AITA for being sad my fiance turned into the ocean #but dragons rising fixed that for me mostly #another reason why dr ON TOP!!!!! #and jay’s characterization in recent seasons is definitely really just mmmm #but his reaction to nya’s leaving made sense and i wish it was explored more but whatever #crystalized is crystalized

[starry-bi-sky]

i need to get this out of my head before i continue clone^2 but danny being the first batkid. Like, standard procedure stuff: his parents and sister die, danny ends up with Vlad Masters. He drags him along to stereotypical galas and stuff; Danny is not having a good time.

He ends up going to one of the Wayne Galas being hosted ever since elusive Bruce Wayne has returned to Gotham. Vlad is crowing about having this opportunity as he's been wanting to sink his claws into the company for a long while now. Danny is too busy grieving to care what he wants.

And like most Galas, once Vlad is done showing him off to the other socialites and the like, he disappears. Off to a dark corner, or to one of the many balconies; doesn't matter. There he runs into said star of the show, Bruce who is still young, has been Batman for at least a year at this point, but still getting used to all these damn people and socializing. He's stepped off to hide for a few minutes before stepping back into the shark tank.

And he runs into a kid with circles under his eyes and a dull gleam in them. Familiar, like looking into a mirror.

Danny tries to excuse himself, he hasn't stopped crying since his parents died and it's been months. He rubs his eyes and stands up, and stumbles over a half-hearted apology to Mister Wayne. Some of Vlad's etiquette lessons kicking in.

Bruce is awkward, but he softens. "That's alright, lad," he says, pulling up some of that Brucie Wayne confidence, "I was just coming out here to get some fresh air."

There's a little pressing; Bruce asks who he's here with, Danny says, voice quiet and grief-stricken, that he's with his godfather Vlad Masters. Bruce asks him if he knows where he is, and Danny tells him he does. Bruce offers to leave, Danny tells him to do whatever he wants.

It ends with Bruce staying, standing off to the side with Danny in silence. Neither of them say a word, and Danny eventually leaves first in that same silence.

Bruce looks into Vlad Masters after everything is over, his interest piqued. He finds news about him taking in Danny Fenton: he looks into Danny Fenton. He finds news articles about his parents' deaths, their occupations, everything he can get his hands on.

At the next gala, he sees Danny again. And he looks the same as ever: quiet like a ghost, just as pale, and full of grief. Bruce sits in silence with him again for nearly ten minutes before he strikes a conversation.

"Do you like to do anything?"

Nothing. Just silence.

Bruce isn't quite sure what to do: comfort is not his forte, and Danny doesn't know him. He's smart enough to know that. So he starts talking about other things; anything he can think of that Brucie Wayne might say, that also wasn't inappropriate for a kid to hear.

Danny says nothing the entire time, and is again the first to leave.

Bruce watches from a distance as he intercts with Vlad Masters; how Vlad Masters interacts with him. He doesn't like what he sees: Vlad Masters keeps a hand on Danny's shoulder like one would hold onto the collar of a dog. He parades him around like a trophy he won.

And there are moments, when someone gets too close or when someone tries to shake Danny's hand, of deep possessiveness that flints over Vlad Masters' eyes. Like a dragon guarding a horde.

He plays the act of doting godfather well: but Bruce knows a liar when he sees one. Like recognizes like.

Danny is dull-eyed and blank faced the entire time; he looks miserable.

So Bruce tries to host more parties; if only so that he can talk to Danny alone. Vlad seems all too happy to attend, toting Danny along like a ribbon, and on the dot every hour, Danny slips away to somewhere to hide. Bruce appears twenty minutes later.

"I was looking into your godfather's company," he says one night, trying to think of more things to say. Some nights all they do is sit in silence. "Some of my shareholders were thinking of partnering up--"

"Don't."

He stops. Danny hardly says a word to him, he doesn't even look at him -- he's sitting on the ground, his head in his knees. Like he's trying to hide from the world. But he's looking, blue eyes piercing up at Bruce.

Bruce tilts his head, practiced puppy-like. "Pardon?"

"Don't." Danny says, strongly. "Don't make any deals with Vlad."

It's the most words Danny's spoken to him, and there's a look in his eyes like a candle finding its spark. Something hard. Bruce presses further, "And why is that?"

The spark flutters, and flushes out. Danny blinks like he's coming out of a trance, and slumps back into himself. "Just don't."

Bruce stares at him, thoughtful, before looking away. "Alright. I won't."

And they fall back into silence.

Danny, when he leaves, turns to look at Bruce, "I mean it." He says; soft like he's telling a secret, "Don't make any deals with him. Don't be alone with him. Don't work with him."

He's scampered away before Bruce can question him further.

(He never planned on working with Vlad Masters and his company; he's done his research. He's seen the misfortune. But nothing ever leads back to him. There's no evidence of anything. But Danny knows something.)

At their next meeting, Danny starts the conversation. It's new, and it's welcomed. He says, cutting through their five minute quiet, that he likes stars. And he doesn't like that he can't see them in Gotham.

Bruce hums in interest, and Danny continues talking. It's as if floodgates had been opened, and as Bruce takes a sip of his wine, it tastes like victory.

("Tucker told me once--") ("Tucker?") ("Oh-- uh, one of my best friends. He's a tech geek. We haven't talked in a while.")

(Danny shut down in his grief -- his friends are worried, but can't reach him. When he goes back to the manor with Vlad, he fishes out his phone and sends them a message.)

(They are ecstatic to hear from him.)

It all culminates until one day, when Danny is leaving to go back inside, that Bruce speaks up. "You know," He says, leaning against the railing. "The manor has many rooms; plenty of space for a guest."

The implication there, hidden between the lines. And Danny is smart, he looks at Bruce with a sharp glean in his eyes, and he nods. "Good to know."

The next time they see each other, Danny has something in his hands. "Can you hold onto something for me?" He asks.

When Bruce agrees, Danny places a pearl into his palm. or, at least, it's something that looks like a pearl. Because it's cold to the touch; sinking into Bruce's white silk gloves with ease and shimmering like an opal. It moves a little as it settles into his hand, and the moves like its full of liquid.

Bruce has never seen anything like it before, but he does know this; it's not human. "What is it?" He asks, and Danny looks uncomfortable.

"I can't tell you that." He says, shifting on his foot like he's scared of someone seeing it. "But please be careful with it. Treat it like it's extremely fragile."

When Bruce gets home, he puts it in an empty ring box and hides the box in the cave. He tries researching into what it is. he can't find anything concrete.

Everything comes to a head one day when Danny appears at the manor's doorstep one evening, soaking wet in the rain, and bleeding from the side.

#dpxdc #dp x dc #danny fenton is not the ghost king #dpxdc crossover #dpdc #dp x dc crossover #dpxdc prompt #man i just really need more dpdc stuff where danny and bruce have a good relationship. like man i NEED it. like i need to see these two #bonding together. and not in a cracky 'oh danny is a distant friend/cousin/etc' stuff but like. active participants in each other's lives #or as active as can be in this case. i neeeeed these two getting along and caring about one another #this idea came to me like last night and hasn't left since nd it was driving me up the wall to think about both positively and negatively b #i neeeded someone to hear about this or i was gonna implode #danny is the first son #tried to just get the general gist of the idea down but i definitely thought of the idea that bruce lowkey suspects vlad for having a hand #Vlad allows Danny to sneak off because he thinks Danny is alone. if he knew Bruce was there he'd be piiisssed and would put a stop to it #Sam and Tucker are alive they just got ghosted for a bit by danny bc he was in Major Grief and didn't wanna socialize. He couldn't go to #them because he didn't wanna put them in danger via Vlad. #oh that thing he handed Bruce? Yeah that's his ghost core. I have a headcanon (that isnt always applied) that ghosts can take their cores #out of their bodies at will and painlessly and without issue. and its common practice actually to do so bc they can be a not insignificant #distance away from said core before problems start to act up. and its common for ghosts to leave their physical cores at their lairs for #safekeeping because as long as the physical core is fine: so is the ghost. they can reform if their body gets destroyed. it also acts as a #fast travel sometimes. where they can reform at their core in an instant. its not inspired in the slightest by SU but i do see the overlap #most cores are pretty small for safety sake: its harder to hit if its small. and they're pr resilient too but its better to be safe than #sorry. so yeah. danny essentially gave bruce the physical embodiment of his soul and indirectly said #'if anything happens to me at least i'll be safe with you' #danny doesn't know he's batman btw #starry rambles. #was gonna go into danny becoming a vigilante beside bruce but im sleeeepy so i'll do that in a reblog. he's gonna go by nightingale if #anyone is interested. stereotypical but to be frank it is a *good* name imo. has a good amount of syllables and consonants to it #and the bird theme. and since its part of an ancestral name it has even more backing for it being bird-y without being meta

[aroaceleovaldez]

i still think a lot about how technically, it's implied Anubis and Walt started dating each other before they asked out Sadie, and if Sadie had said she wasn't interested they would have gone "Entirely fair have a nice day" and proceed to just go continue to date each other.

Cause like, that was the entire thing. They decided that themselves. That things would work best if they were together (as in both physically sharing a body and also relationship-wise). The "asking Sadie about it" part was secondary. If she had said no, they would have stayed together, because among other things Walt would kind of die if they didn't. Walt and Anubis are technically the first gay couple in the Riordanverse. AND they're in a polyamorous relationship with Sadie. Why does no one talk about them ever.

#tkc #the kane chronicles #riordanverse #walt stone #anubis tkc #sadie kane #saltnubis #< great ship name btw #and for anyone who says ''i dont think Rick intended that'' mind you this book was released like #six months before HoH came out (and. subsequently also. Nico.) #like. Rick was not ignorant of queer stuff at that time. he was actively writing it into HoO/HoH while writing both simultaneously #if Sadie had said no they wouldn't have just gone ''okay Sadie pick one of us and the other will cease to exist on the mortal plane'' #they would have gone ''okay well good luck we have a coffee date scheduled so we're gonna go do that'' #saltnubis is still probably the most entertaining solution to a love triangle in middle grade media i have ever encountered #even some YA media. just ''yeah so we solved both our major problems by dating but like. we know you like both of us sooooo...?'' #also hilarious that meanwhile Carter's romance arc is ''so turns out my first girlfriend was a clone made of pottery'' #''and the actual girl has never met me and this is kinda awkward''

[firefox-official]

i do find it absurd that people will dog on me and then get mad when i respond like 😭😭😭im literally alive

#also im 19😭come on #i cant reply to an insult bc i have a lot of followers? i didnt ask them to follow me!!!! #i understand being responsible for your audience but this is not one of those times #intending to cause a problem and then getting upset when a problem is caused just because you assumed i woudlnt interact with it? #yeah you were being sarcastic or kidding or whatever Umm so was i?

[realbeefman]

stacy is sooo interesting because she's in love with house but knows that they will never ever be able to have a healthy, stable, sane relationship because they're too similar so. she finds house-lite instead and marries him and. essentially moves on with her life! and is successful in this because she's a moderately well-adjusted person!

wilson, in contrast, never manages to escape the inevitable, in spite of his best efforts to find a house-lite of his very own, because he's an absolute fucking freak and ends up glued to house to the bitter. bitter end

#yeah im too sleepy to revise this. UNFILTERED posting wooahh #some may b shocked but i do actually read thru most of my posts several times to make sure i didnt accidentally write mein kampfe 2 #recently ive come to the realization that i am in fact not an incredibly chill person #and that the constant paranoia and fear in which i live my life is actually PROBABLY a symptom of severe anxiety #like damn. ive always known that im pretty prone to depression but ive preetty much always been aware of that #my mom is a chronic depressive so i know the symptoms i know the signs i have a pretty good arsenal of healthy coping mechanisms #UNFORTUNATELY mommy's mental health problems did not help her not abuse me as a child #so i ended up being a terribly anxious kid who was constantly being screamed at and told i was overreacting (because i was. because i had #a severe anxiety problem that was making me react irrationally.) to everything all the time #which is you know. it is VERY difficult to deal with a mental health problem when you arent aware you have a problem! #its incredible how much. better. my life has gotten since i figured this out and started actively trying to work out what triggers it #and being able to like. realize 'oookay. there is an Issue here and it needs to be overcome' #instead of just beating on myself constantly for not being able to do things without feeling sick or getting breathing problems! #anyways. trauma dumping in tags is over now! #house md #hilson #greg house #james wilson #stacy warner

[inkskinned]

the thing is there's like, a point of oversaturation for everything, and it's why so many things get dropped after a few minutes. and we act like millennials or gen z kids "have short attention spans" but... that's not quite it. it's more like - we did like it. you just ruined it.

capitalism sees product A having moderate success, and then everything has to come out with their "own version" of product A (which is often exactly the same). and they dump extreme amounts of money and environmental waste into each horrible simulacrum they trot out each season.

now it's not just tiktokkers making videos; it's that instagram and even fucking tumblr both think you want live feeds and video-first programming. and it helps them, because videos are easier to sneak native ads into. the books coming out all have to have 78 buzzwords in them for SEO, or otherwise they don't get published. they are making a live-action remake of moana. i haven't googled it, but there's probably another marvel or starwars something coming out, no matter when you're reading this post.

and we are like "hi, this clone of project A completely misses the point of the original. it is soulless and colorless and miserable." and the company nods and says "yes totally. here is a different clone, but special." and we look at clone 2 and we say "nope, this one is still flat and bad, y'all" and they're like "no, totally, we hear you," and then they make another clone but this time it's, like, a joyless prequel. and by the time they've successfully rolled out "clone 89", the market is incredibly oversaturated, and the consumer is blamed because the company isn't turning a profit.

and like - take even something digital like the tumblr "live streaming" function i just mentioned. that has to take up server space and some amount of carbon footprint; just so this brokenass blue hellsite can roll out a feature that literally none of its userbase actually wants. the thing that's the kicker here: even something that doesn't have a physical production plant still impacts the environment.

and it all just feels like it's rolling out of control because like, you watch companies pour hundreds of thousands of dollars into a remake of a remake of something nobody wants anymore and you're like, not able to afford eggs anymore. and you tell the company that really what you want is a good story about survival and they say "okay so you mean a YA white protagonist has some kind of 'spicy' love triangle" and you're like - hey man i think you're misunderstanding the point of storytelling but they've already printed 76 versions of "city of blood and magic" and "queen of diamond rule" and spent literally millions of dollars on the movie "Candy Crush Killer: Coming to Eat You".

it's like being stuck in a room with a clown that keeps telling the same joke over and over but it's worse every time. and that would be fine but he keeps fucking charging you 6.99. and you keep being like "no, i know it made me laugh the first time, but that's because it was different and new" and the clown is just aggressively sitting there saying "well! plenty of people like my jokes! the reason you're bored of this is because maybe there's something wrong with you!"

#this was much longer i had to cut it down for legibility #but i do want to say i am aware this post doesnt touch on human rights violations as a result of fast fashion #that is because it deserves its own post with a completely different tone #i am an environmental educator #so that's what i know the most about. it wouldn't be appropriate of me to mention off-hand the real and legitimate suffering #that people are going through #without doing my research and providing real ways to help #this is a vent post about a thing i'm watching happen; not a call to action. it would be INCREDIBLY demeaning #to all those affected by the fast fashion industry to pretend that a post like this could speak to their suffering #unfortunately one of the horrible things about latestage capitalism as an activist is that SO many things are linked to this #and i WANT to talk about all of them but it would be a book in its own right. in fact there ARE books about each level of this #and i encourage you to seek them out and read them!!! i am not an expert on that i am just a person on tumblr doing my favorite activity #(complaining) #and it's like - this is the individual versus the industry problem again right because im blaming myself #for being an expert on environmental disaster (which is fucking important) but not knowing EVERYTHING about fast fashion #i'm blaming myself for not covering the many layers of this incredibly complicated problem im pointing out #rather than being like. yeah so actually the fault here lies with the billion dollar industries actually. #my failure to be able to condense an incredibly immense problem that is BOOK-LENGTH into a single text post that i post for free #is not in ANY fucking way the same amount of harm as. you know. the ACTUAL COMPANIES doing this ACTUAL THING for ACTUAL MONEY. #anyway im gonna go donate money while i'm thinking about it. maybe you can too. we can both just agree - well i fuckin tried didn't i #which is more than their CEOs can say

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

yeah so i'm falling for @weevmo's Guys... they're so neat! i dig their vibes and can't wait to see what Corduroy Stew is all about <3

#fuckkkkk theyre so SHAPED!!! #i can feel myself getting So attached #if anything happens to them... i will simultaneously wail and cheer #nimrod is so cute. nimmy. the nimster. id love to toss birdseed on the ground for him to peck at. pigeon coded tiny man #lulu being a sock puppet trainer THATS SUCH A NEAT IDEA ARE YOU KIDDING IM OBSESSED #now im curious as to if sock puppets are like Animals or if they're as sapient as the others... #but yes im already looking directly at lulu she seems Fun as fuck #oughhhhh and wb. listen. Listen. im a sucker for handsome Head Empty characters and he seems like one of those #i also like characters with many hidden internal problems and wb seems like one of those too <3 #i hear that the three of them are siblings and that is Such catnip to me... #scribble garnish #dont know what else to tag this as! huh! #BUT YEAH THIS ALL SEEMS NEAT THEYRE COOL i Will be following this project to see where it goes #so far it has great characters a sprinkling of Intrigue bomb art (which. ofc it does its weevmo cmon guys) #and a neat song that i sweAR TO FUCK REMINDS ME OF SOMETHING. THIS HAS BEEN BOTHERING ME FOR DAYS #the jingle is just vaguely familiar enough to make me Writhe in the agony of Unknown Knowns #but yes! i hope you all go check out weevmo's blog if you havent already! Good Stuff All Around!!

[journey-to-the-attic]

(有点晚的) 新年快乐!

happy (a little belated) lunar new year!! sorry i haven't been answering asks, been a busy week - i'll try to get to that tomorrow ^^

#it was originally just diavolo and ik but i added mephistopheles bc it felt kinda empty #and also because we were making fun of him on discord the other night and i felt bad #art #obey me #jtta ik #obey me diavolo #obey me mephistopheles #oh yeah the Stupid Trio + belphie in the back were last-minute addition but i'm so glad i decided to #by Stupid Trio i mean they're the ones who cause problems #mammon and levi do it by accident and asmo does it knowingly but without processing the consequences #this is what sets them apart from belphie and satan who also cause problems #but usually on purpose and with significant planning (satan) or being fully aware of the aftermath and not caring (belphie) #speaking of i guess i'll tag them as well #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me asmodeus #obey me belphegor #btw beel also causes problems by accident but like not in a blatantly Stupid way #and lucifer is usually the Problem Sufferer #but will on occasion cause problems for fun

[tealares-art]

:] theyre just hanging out

#made this out of spite of my mother saying to draw my numbers “healthy and skinny”. the problem with that is obvious #so . healing the world... #this isnt suggestive btw. if u were thinking so #yeah :] #might main tag it? idk I'm a little shy abt posting it in general but spite against my mother is driving me forwards #two tpot #x bfb #fanart #alrite...

[kabutoden]

if aradia's death was just in-character for a long roleplay, what's the deal with tavros and terezi's disabilities? did vriska have anything to do with them?

She Did Do Those Things. vriska no!!!!!!

#im insane that vriska is a roleplayer #its so funny to me i love roleplaying jokes #for those not in the know: 'i was just acting in character' is a common phrase used by people Behaving Badly #vriskas like OOOOOOHHH you want me to break the carefully crafted and lovingly acted personality of marquise spinneret mindfang? you monste #listen!!! im playing as my spidersona!!!!! its what she would do shes a spider you want me to not act like a spider??? #vriska. you threw the boy off a cliff screaming and cackling to yourself FLY PUPA FLY #thats not '''''''in character''''' marquise spinneret wouldnt have fucking done that you bitch!!! you just got bored and started #causing problems!!!! #her glasses details had to be shifted around because vriska saying to terezi 'its harder for me. i lost 7 eyes you only lost 2' is so fucki #oh my god vriska no. NO. VRISKA #but yeah she did still do those things. i wasnt sure how to handle this but i decided to go this way. a vriska is a vriska #vriska #homestuck #bugstuck #vriska serket #One time I got a death threat in the middle of an in-person roleplaying game. That underclassman just looked at me with hatred in their eye #a panic attack #then later after THAT they began openly weeping.

[ghouljams]

I’ve been wondering something about BumbleBee (my nickname for Cowboy!König’s darling. Because her horse is named Honey and also just cause she seems clumsy like the bees that bump into my windows all the time). Why is she doing….whatever it is she’s doing? She seems to not have any experience whatsoever with animals (or maybe it’s just horses), doesn’t have any basic knowledge of her own surroundings (I’m guessing on that, since she didn’t recognize that the one snake was a garter snake and harmless), and just overall seems kinda new to this.

I love bumblebee, that's so cute. Ghoul stamp of approval. König calls her "Hummelchen" specifically because of Honey and her clumsiness. 

So the author’s note here is that the house/farm is her grandparent's. It's her inheritance and she's sort of half fixing it up while she's living there. She is a city transplant who is truly making a new life for herself after the sort of really messy divorce you only get when you were high school sweethearts that got married waaaay too young. He was not good to her. Like she lost everything and is slowly rebuilding her life with Honey(and König).

We're going to pretend that this is König asking this question so I can do some cute fic. Man wants to know what's up with his future wife and is willing to use basic interrogation tactics to do that. This is pretty immediately after Bee gets cleaned up.

The question hangs in the air between the two of you. Your lips are still pressed to the mug in your hands, halfway to sipping the coffee offered to you. König stares at you before leaning forward against the table.

"I'm sorry, that was rude of me." He says, back tracking. You settle your mug on the table.

"No, I'm… pretty clearly not used to this," You say tapping your fingers against your mug, "I get why you'd be curious."

König thought of the neat stack of papers he had on you in his closet. Your entire life laid out on printer paper and background checks. An entire dossier, everything he could find on you. He wasn't curious, he wanted to know your thoughts. Facts were only useful as far as he could make conversation, and he couldn't ask about anything private you hadn't told him yourself, even if he did know too much about you.

"Truth be told I'm not really sure what I'm doing out here, it's not like I have any dreams of farming or animal husbandry." You smile at your mug, the warmth is comforting, König is comforting, "but I didn't really have anywhere else to go, so here I am."

"Nowhere else to go," König half asks, you nod.

"Yeah, I mean, after I split from-" you cringe, not wanting to say their name, it's fine König knows it either way, "I sort of lost everything but the house and Honey."

"Scheiße," König mumbles to himself, eyes hot and angry, how anyone could put you through the hell you’d been through was beyond him. If it was him, he never would’ve let you go, never would’ve forced you to that breaking point. If it was him…

But now it is him, or it will be him. You look so sweet and kept sitting across from him in his oversized shirt, biting your pretty pink lip and staring down your own wobbly reflection in your mug. 

“It’s not so bad,” You assure yourself, “I have the whole house to myself, and I can go into town whenever I want, and I’ve got Honey to keep me company.” And me, König thinks to himself, you’ve got me too.

“If you ever need help with anything,” He offers, and you smile at him, a half shy thing that still lights up the kitchen like sunshine.

“I do seem to need a lot of help,” You laugh a little. König nods, and you reach across the table to smack his arm, "You're not supposed to agree with me."

"Sorry," his eyes are so pretty when he smiles, the way they crease and sparkle just for you makes your stomach flip. Maybe it won’t be so bad living out here with König just down the street. You could use a good friend.

#Cowboy!König #Wow this is so cute except that König has her underwear in his pocket #creep(affectionate) #I realize I just posted him being a stalker on the highkey but here's some DL stalking #könig x you #König x reader #konig x you #konig mw2 #konig x reader #the way I keep going yeah reader insert and making a pov OC #you're all enabling me that's the problem