#tfw meta

[joycrispy]

I'm seeing some confusion out and about over the title A Companion to Owls (generally along the lines of 'what have owls got to do with it???'), so I'd like to offer my interpretation (with a general disclaimer that the Bible and particularly the Old Testament are damn complicated and I'm not able to address every nuance in a fandom tumblr post, okay? Okay):

It's a phrase taken from the Book of Job. Here's the quote in full (King James version):

When I looked for good, then evil came unto me: and when I waited for light, there came darkness. My bowels boiled, and rested not: the days of affliction prevented me. I went mourning without the sun: I stood up, and I cried in the congregation. I am a brother to dragons, and a companion to owls. --(Job 30:29)

Job is describing the depths of his grief, but also, with that last line, his position in the web of providence.

Throughout the Old Testament, owls are a recurring symbol of spiritual devastation. Deuteronomy 4:17 - Isaiah 34:11 - Psalm 102: 3 - Jeremiah 50: 39...just to name a few (there's more). The general shape of the metaphor is this: owls are solitary, night-stalking creatures, that let out either mournful cries or terrible shrieks, that inhabit the desolate places of the world...and (this is important) they are unclean.

They represent a despair that is to be shunned, not pitied, because their condition is self-inflicted. You defied God (so the owl signifies), and your punishment is...separation. From God, from others, from the world itself. To call and call and never, ever receive an answer.

Your punishment is terrible, tormenting loneliness.

(and that exact phrase, "tormenting loneliness," doesn't come from me...I'm pulling it from actual debate/academia on this exact topic. The owls, and what they are an omen for. Oof.)

To call yourself a 'companion to owls,' then, is to count yourself alongside perhaps the most tragic of the damned --not the ones who defy God out of wickedness or ignorance, and in exile take up diabolical ends readily enough...but the ones who know enough to mourn what they have lost.

So, that's how the title relates to Job: directly. Of course, all that is just context. The titular "companion to owls," in this case, isn't Job at all.

Because this story is about Aziraphale.

The thing is that Job never actually defied God at all, but Aziraphale does, and he does so fully believing that he will fall.

He does so fully believing that he's giving in to a temptation.

He's wrong about that, but still...he's realized something terrifying. Which is that doing God's will and doing what's right are sometimes mutually exclusive. Even more terrifying: it turns out that, given the choice between the two...he chooses what's right.

And he's seemingly the only angel who does. He's seemingly the only angel who can even see what's wrong.

Fallen or not, that's the kind of knowledge that...separates you.

(Whoooo-eeeeee, tormenting loneliness!!!)

Aziraphale is the companion.

...I don't think I need to wax poetic about Aziraphale's loneliness and grappling with devotion --I think we all, like, get it, and other people have likely said it better anyway. So, one last thing before I stop rambling:

Check out Crowley's glasses.

(screenshots from @seedsofwinter)

Crowley is the owl.

Crowley is the goddamn owl.

#good omens #good omens 2 #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #aziraphale #crowley #there's probably a few thousand words more I could say about this but. I think I'll just hang the implications deliciously aloft for now. #something something tfw the embodiment of all your worst fears and self-doubts shows you the only real kindness you've known for centuries #you can't help but love him and you can't help but fear him but above all you TRUST him the way you're supposed to trust God but don't #brrrrrrr #do you think Crowley would vibe with being an omen of spiritual devastation or do you think he would get drunk about it #good omens meta

[insanesonofabitch]

Kind of funny. SPN was supposed to end in s5, with Sam in Hell, Cas in Heaven, and Dean on Earth, living with a wife and a son. But it ends after ten more season later with Cas in superhell, Dean in Heaven, and Sam on Earth, living with a wife and a son. Like some fucked up game of musical chairs. Except the chairs are never taken, the song remains the same, and they’re just going in circles. Anyways, Happy November 19th.

#remember that video where Jensen expressed dislike towards the finale #and they basically told him “look at it from the fan perspective” you mean like fans from 10 years ago??? #they completely acknowledged that majority of their fandom NOW would not fucking like that ending. #they brought back Becky just to tell Chuck that it fucking SUCKED. #[sigh] #supernatural #spn #spn meta #spn finale #spngate #spn 5x22 #swan song #spn 15x20 #carry on #chuck won theory #chuck won #team free will #tfw #sam winchester #dean winchester #castiel #destiel #reiotalks

[yokyoaaa]

Metadede wedding but EVERYONE got invited

#tfw your friends have a LOT of connections #invite your family members and separate them over which side is the bride's family and which side is the groom's family ❌ #separate them over which side is from smash bros and which side is friends from your own franchise ✅ #my art #metadede #king dedede #meta knight #kirby #taranza #magolor #ain't tagging anyone else

[metalatias5]

Doodled the sketch above, then my girldad added the "or Schokodonuts" bit, so I added the scene in the bottom right XD

Would also like to note that she made sure to not put any pressure behind her addition so I could've easily erased it again if I wanted to, that was very thoughtful of her :)

#Hazbin Hotel #Hazbin Lucifer #Lucifer Morningstar #Hazbin Charlie #Charlie Morningstar #Ducks #Chocolate donuts #Meta #MetaTheTrifox #MetaLatias #MetaLatias5 #Tfw you're drawing the daddy with issues and have a reminder of your own daddy issues add onto it

[soullessjack]

while i firmly believe that choosing to view the writers’ continuity issues as chuck-fuckery is just a way to dissuade them from being bad at their jobs , i do think it still lends pretty well to the overall trapped-in-narrative horror that spn was gunning for. like, how many times has Cas been randomly weakened below his actual capabilities to allow for some plot necessity? how many times have sam and dean conveniently forgotten different spells or weapons that would make their current crisis an easy fix, or just seemingly not processed what someone else has told them?

how often has jack become randomly unstable or unable to do certain things (cough resurrect Mary). or even how each of the guys will randomly disappear from an episode when they aren’t needed? what about every side character that fucked off after a plot was done, that would be lucky enough for an offscreen mention to acknowledge their existence?

yeah yeah it’s poor seasonally rotted writer’s faults, but let’s pretend spn is a good solid show for a minute and think. Chuck can literally make them weak and helpless or uncontrollably powerful on a fucking whim. He can erase things from their memories, erase parts of their lives even, and straight up remove people entirely if he feels like it. it’s like the plot armor episode but worse, because this isn’t just about their plot armor. it’s their memory, their lives, their own free will being fucked with. Chuck can do whatever the fuck he wants and as much as it’s a blatant excuse for the show’s flaws, it also works really well for the meta / autonomous horror.

#draft post #spn #spn meta #chuck won theory #chuck shurley #tfw 2.0 #team free will #jack kline #sam winchester #dean winchester #castiel #spn s15 #spn analysis

[saltpepperbeard]

I cant stop thinking about the end of episode 6, specifically the Stede and Ed of it all.

Just the look on Stede's face when he pulls Ed in kills me. I need to know everything in there, in words.

Also, what do you think wouldve happened if instinct hadnt taken over? Would they have actually talked it through (as a crew?) Or would Stede have just brushed over it again and Ed accept it?. This is pretty much the only time he tries to actually help stede like this.

Also, because im rambling, why doesnt Ed defend Stede properly when people insult him? does he think it just doesnt affect him or something?

Pardon the tardy answer on this one, anon! I was in the void, only to get decked upside the head by Leslie Jones once I crawled out of said void lol. BUT OKAY OKAY-

*rubs hands together like a fly*

This face absolutely kills me too. And I feel like it says so much without saying a word at all. I feel like it says, "I'm so happy and relieved to see you right now because the true torture of the night was seeing you get threatened." And, "I love you so much for checking up on me, but I don't have it in me to use words right now, and can't really express what I'm feeling any other way than through actions." And, "I'm so terrified after what just happened, but having you here is such a grounding force."

Like just...the glassy sheen to his eyes but the relief to his overall visage...Mr. Darby I'm billing you for damages <3 sdjksldls. I think he was just so so happy to see Ed in that moment, and so relieved to have him after nearly losing him again.

And as far as talking things through goes...I honestly feel like Stede still would have stayed clammed up. I have a feeling it would have been like how it was when he initially opened the door, ie Ed doing the talking/leading the conversation while Stede stays quiet. Maybe Ed sharing such deep feelings and vulnerability would have eventually pried his shell open and gotten him to express a few fears? But idk, because at the same time, Stede witnessed Ed's bathtub moment, and it didn't really shake any of his own personal walls.

I just think he has such a complicated thing going with his own self-image, masculinity, and trauma, that it would have been very very difficult for him to openly admit to pain/terror/etc etc—especially weakness. Especially the thing that earned him vitriol and stones and death threats. And especially not to the man he respects and looks up to so much.

And SPEAKING of which, in regard to your last question, I think Ed doesn't step in to defend him for two reasons. One, he's the protector against physical abuse, whereas Stede is the protector against verbal abuse. This lovely post here [x] explains it beautifully; "they're both protecting each other from the dangers they know." Ed acts very quickly if some sort of physical harm threatens Stede, whereas Stede acts very quickly if some sort of vitriol threatens Ed. Neither of them want the other to experience the pain they're so acclimated to, and subsequently are each other's defender from such.

And two, sort of along those lines, I don't think he recognizes the hurt that can come from it, just as Stede maybe doesn't recognize the hurt that can come from all the violence. Maybe he doesn't realize how deeply it has cut Stede, just as Stede doesn't really recognize how deeply violence has cut Ed. I don't know how to word this properly lol but like...they view what hurts the other as almost a non-issue.

You can see their varying reactions and differences a few times in episode 6 actually. When Ned is physically torturing them, Stede doesn't really react when Ed is burned, but Ed reacts strongly when Stede is burned. And when Ned is flinging vitriol about prior to the violence, Ed doesn't really react to it, but Stede scowls and fights against his restraints.

And then when they're on deck, Stede doesn't think to take cover when the attack is starting, but Ed immediately flings himself in front of him. And when Ned is trying to goad Ed into getting upset, Ed doesn't take the bait whatsoever, whereas Stede steps up and gets upset on his behalf.

Not to mention also, Stede being like "Haha escaping violence? Not bloody likely" the morning after. I know that's episode 7 lol, but my pOINT STILL STANDS. They both expect those things respectively—Ed expects insulting talk from other pirates, and Stede expects violence in their line of work, but they're actually rife with trauma for the two of them.

TLDR, they balance each other and ground each other so well, but imagine how much more they would if they shared all these deeper thoughts. I'm still holding out hope that Stede will have his bathtub moment in season 3, or even just show a lick of vulnerability around Ed. Maybe the domesticity/concept of marriage will scare him enough into opening up a bit more/talking things through, or even just settling into a more mature relationship with Ed will give him the grounds to do so.

REGARDLESS, they are just a broth that's....*Roach voice* beautiful, complicated, balanced...

#Answered #Anons #OFMD #OFMD Season 2 #Gentlebeard #Blackbonnet #Stede Bonnet #Edward Teach #Revenge Rambles #i absolutely love talking about things with y'all! #and absolutely love spinning meta of course #and absolutely LOVE getting prompted to do so #So it's so very lovely and appreciated lol thank you anon! #AND STEDE JUST... #STEDE REALLY GETS MY COGS TURNING MAN LMAO #TFW UR SILLY LITTLE GUY ACTUALLY HAS SO MANY FRIGGIN LAYERS AND COMPLEXITIES HSDJKLS

[shallowseeker]

Dean’s grief on speedrun

How long was Cas dead, anyway?

I think they reunited around day 18-24 days ish. The scripts give us some clues. (Based on this post)

==Dean is grieving hard==

He’s not in denial, like Sam seems to be -> “Is he really dead?” “You know he is.”

And because Dean now knows Chuck & Amara, he’s not getting stuck in bargaining stage (his usual MO). There is no door of hope to leave ajar after the cosmic consequences are rendered. (Not even the symbolic going-through-the-motions kind that he never intends to open again.)

No, this time, Dean’s in the throes of an incredibly frightening, paralyzing despair (images).

This is partially due to the fact that he saw it coming, and he fought so hard. He resolved to avoid the looming, cosmic consequences, to “not let Cas walk away, not again (script).” Dean made up his mind to act to protect the, “everything he’s ever wanted (script).”

And still, everything went so wrong.

///

The grief, then, is different. It’s a despair born of crushed hopes and dreams. Not to mention, forgiveness and acceptance—as Dean got onboard to help Cas, regardless of his own misgivings, because Cas “had faith in the kid.”

After everyone dies, Dean pleads with God/Chuck. Chuck is the one who brought Cas back before and the only one who seems able to rebuild angels. He doesn’t answer.

Even though Dean had a special connection to Amara, the one who resurrected his burned-up, supposed-to-stay-dead mother, she doesn’t answer either.

This time, he knows they’re out there, perhaps even listening. And they’re not answering because Dean’s run out of free passes and miracles.

This time, that knowledge crushes him where he stands.

///

DAY 1-2 (Lost and Found)

13x01 starts in the twilight hours after the big Lucifer fight.

Dean takes a shot at Jack, and Jack flees.

Heaven and Hell hunt them relentlessly.

They retrieve Jack from North Cove police station.

An angel stabs Jack in the chest with an angel blade, and he seems astonished to be “fine.”

Sam and Dean take time to grieve and scatter ashes.

The funeral occurs that evening, and they quickly get on the road.

///

DAY 3 ish (The Rising Son)

In 13x02, they're still driving home from the funeral towards the bunker, "12 hours till we get home," and Sam convinces Dean to stop at a motel.

Addition: When they eat, Jack remarks that he's 3 days old. "3 days, 17 hours, and 42 minutes."

Over the course of this episode, per the script, 2 days pass.

They eat dinner, go to a tattoo parlor, meet up with Donatello, and stay overnight in the motel.

Heaven and Hell continue to hunt them relentlessly.

Sam, Dean, and Donatello debate nature vs nurture, with Dean and Donatello leaning towards nature.

Sam psycho-analyzes Dean and delivers euphemisms to Jack about Dean “wanting to protect everyone and getting his wires crossed,” but ultimately, he isn’t forthcoming to Jack about the reality of the situation. (That is, it was Lucifer that killed Cas, and Lucifer who pulled Mary into another world--that Dean's grieving!) These important details might've helped Jack to understand his situation with a lot more clarity and grace. This will cause Jack to cool towards Sam when Dean reveals the truth during an argument.

Demons find them the next morning.

In fact, Dean nearly dies against a common demon, getting cornered on a hotel bed, but he is saved at the last minute by Sam’s interference.

Jack, tricked by Asmodeus, nearly releases the Shadim.

They drive home.

Later, Jack freaks out about being impervious to stabbing. In his new bunker room, he laments, “What the hell am I? I can’t control… whatever this is. I will hurt someone.”

Dean tells him he will be Jack's executioner if Jack loses control.

At most, it's been only 5 days since everyone died.

///

DAY 5 ish (Patience)

13x03 picks up mere hours after they get home, and it covers 5 days total. So, that brings us to a decently solid total of 10-ish days when this episode finishes.

Dean can't bear to be in the bunker with mission-mode Sam and Jack, so he takes off on a hunt.

Clearly in no shape to hunt, Dean dies at the hands of a wraith (and so does Jody). They are both saved by Patience’s interference.

Dean tells Patience there’s no joy in this life. Only pain and death.

Sam and Dean have a huge fight about Jack, during which Dean accidentally gives Jack context to the situation (re: Cas’s death, Mary’s plight). This causes Jack, already exhausted by Sam’s well-meaning training regimen, to cool towards Sam the next morning.

Cas appears to awaken in The Empty on day 9 or 10.

///

DAY 10-11 ish (The Big Empty)

13x04 SEEMS like the very next morning, because Dean AND Jack are both still chilly towards Sam. The air is described as arctic, with Dean giving Sam a, "don't even try it, motherfucker," face. Jack accuses Sam of wanting to use him as an interdimensional can opener and "being just like Asmodeus," and Sam comes clean about the truth.

Sam pushes them all to go on a case together. Jack says he doesn’t want to go at first. Sam wants Jack to go with them for the express purpose of forcing Dean to be around him and warm up to him, which isn’t fair to Dean or Jack…not really.

This storyline covers the family therapy scene (great analysis), wherein an interesting attempt at therapy is made under dishonest constraints.

Dean, still clearly in no shape to hunt, is easily overtaken by the shifter and nearly dies. He is saved by Jack’s interference.

According to the script, 13x04 occurs over 4 days. Commentary//

That means that Dean thawed to Jack, after our total of a mere 14 days. By the end of this episode, they're on shaky terms, and by the beginning of 13x06, calling out to each other in a friendly manner, "How was the case?"

Jack "puts a dent in Dean's armor," per the script, even before he saves them with his powers. Dean is doing everything he can not to like Jack, and it’s clear from the script that he’s failing.

At the end of the episode, Dean tells Sam to absorb the weight of the hunting burden, because he’s got no hope left.

Cas appears to awaken in a field on day 14. Presumably, his ashes are in the middle of nowhere, and he starts walking.

///

DAY 14-20 ish? (Advanced Thanatology)

Here’s where it gets foggier.

I can't tell exactly when 13x05 picks up with respect to the previous episode, but it seems like only a little bit of time has passed.

I would say a week at most has passed, but possibly as little as a day or two, and the case itself, per the script, covers another 4 days.

However, if Cas awoke in The Empty on day 10, and woke in the field around day 14, I think I favor a shorter timeline here with some of the “days” being overlapping back story from the case itself.

Anyway, Jack has been making his way through Sam's DVDs, "Red Sonja, Beast Master, Beast Master II." Commentary//

Sam does not intuit why Dean is up late at night/early twilight hours, making a PB & J (analysis).

Sam tries to remedy Dean’s overwhelming grief by pushing breakfast beer and strip clubs toward him. Alcohol to numb the pain + sexy stuff as a distraction. Now more than ever, Dean seems to perform those only for Sam’s benefit. (It seems Sam did not pay attention to Mia Vallens's therapy, except as a means to validate his own motives for trying to save Mary. Ouch! Poor Sam!)

Sam is not great with empathy here, bless my neuroatypical man-child. He’s dealing with a loss of his own, of course, and he’s been shown to be an impatient, mission-motivated griever (analysis).

Anyway, he’s completely at sea with Dean’s powerful grief, and he seems tragically unaware of Dean's close calls/being off his game over the course of the last few hunts.

Sam, perhaps understandably, wants Dean to be there for him n’ Jack, as caretaker and comrade, but Dean is too mentally wounded to bear the weight of that expectation. (Btw, I don’t think Sam really “gets” the Cas thing till 15x09 The Trap: Sam’s future is symbolized by Eileen-as-hope (analysis) and Sam realizes Dean’s future is built around Cas-as-foundation.) Dean dies...again//

Dean attempts suicide.

He tells Billie he doesn’t matter.

After he revives, Dean tells Sam, “No. Sam, I’m not okay. I’m pretty far from okay… And I would take the hit… And now Mom and Cas… And I – I don’t know. I don’t know.”

This is an elegant parallel to season 7’s grieving Dean, about his not being able to “shake” what happened with Cas, and admitting, “he doesn’t know why.” (Cas is different. Cas has always been different.) In season 7, he also says, “I’ll do what I can,” in response to Sam telling him to get his head in the game and stay alive. Cas is a core wound in both scenarios.

///

==Death & resurrection==

So, that would bring our guesstimate to Cas reuniting with the boys around 20-24 days. So, at most a little over 3 weeks but possibly closer to 4, especially if the backstory timelines of actual “case days” overlap, like 13x05 potentially does.

I am reasonably certain Cas awakened in the field near day 14. I’d personally put the actual reunion at 18-20 ish days, and certainly not longer than a month. They reunite in early June, I think. Blackberries are a summer fruit, and there are wild blackberries in the field where Cas awakens.

Dean drives to Cas and meets up with him, "in the middle of nowhere," so it seems Cas's grave and subsequent walk to civilization was in quite a remote area.

///

Going back through this, I was pretty astounded how Dean kept dying or nearly dying in those days following Cas’s death. He was definitely in no state to be hunting.

(images from CSN, SPN wiki, fangirlism.com)

#shal meta #dean/cas #tfw + grieving #dean + grief #spn season 13 #jack kline #the don't talk about cas sam wont' touch the cas thing with a ten-foot pole and i love that about him so much #saaaaam you are so focused on things that are ACTIONABLE like saving mom

[inalandofsadclowns]

When Jack asked why Sam and Dean couldn't know about Cas' deal with the Empty and

Cas: They can. I just don't- I don't want them to. They don't need that burden. You don't need that burden.

Jack: Of course, I do. You did that for me.

Cas: You know, the Empty said that it wouldn't come for me until I had finally given myself permission to be happy. But with everything that we have going on, with Michael still out there, I don't see that happening anytime soon. This life may be a lot of things, but it's rarely happy.

I know. I know that Cas was trying to comfort Jack, in his own, sad way, that he won't be leaving for a long-long time, but...how was this supposed to be comforting??

LOOK AT HIM poor boy is barely holding back tears-

Did Cas believe Jack would be like "fair enough"? That he wouldn't just be more concered after this? You see, a couple of days back Jack was in constant pain and fear of the unknown, because he was very much dying. And he knew that, and his three dads and Rowena knew, and none of them could help...Then Dean took him on a little road trip. He taught Jack to drive, he let him drive the Impala, he bought him junk food then he took him fishing - the same picture Dean remembered from his own favourite childhood memory. And then Jack got to live that, too, and it became his favourite memory as well. It was the happiest he ever felt in his life, even though he was one foot out of life's doorstep while the same threat of Michael loomed over the world even then. And he still gave himself over to happiness, because he realized, he didn't need to go to Vegas or Tahiti to get it, in fact, the purest kind of joy is often in the little things and they always shine the brightest. That's right, even standing by the door of death. And now, he's left wonering, what keeps Castiel from true happiness, that he's certain it's not going to happen soon?

If Jack read between the lines, Cas' reassurement had only made Jack recognise something immensely sad and unreachable within him.

Oh, and the bonus

Can't forget this absolute gem.

#at least we have crunch cookie crunch- #he's making me sooooo #enough you're going in the queue #spn #cas #castiel #jack kline #jack #tfw 2.0 #supernatural #spn meta #spn angst #destiel

[tomwambsgans]

the whole "kendall's buying me a watch" thing is such a shakespearian little farce. greg misreads kendall saying he'd hook him up with a watch as an actual promise (likely specifically due to tom actually buying greg anything and everything that he mentions even in passing), and then he feels obligated to him bc of the huge purchase and like he'd be rude for snubbing him. he tries to tell tom this and what tom hears is that all it takes is a nice watch to make the ever shallow greg switch loyalties, now absolutely seething with jealousy and so so sad bc he thinks greg doesn't care about him... when there are in fact no actual loyalties being switched whatsoever. and all this time kendall literally just meant he knew where greg could get a good watch, has no intention to buy him one, and really doesn't even care very much about keeping greg around at all

#tfw greg takes any crumb of affection and it spins a web of tragicomical misunderstandings #tomgreg #kendall roy #kendall #mine #meta

[maremote]

oh it’s so delicious the way flint’s “god-like” powers only manifest when silver believes in them. he had me there too. and flint’s end comes when silver stops believing in him. delicious. the stories we believe these are the ones that survive.

#og #black sails #tfw ur such a repressed bisexual that you create and then kill a god #black sails meta

[ensrensage]

so anyway i’m distressed about con o’neill’s fucking microexpressions and having a crisis about how he conveys izzy going from yes, yes this is what i wanted, blackbeard is back to wait, no i fucked up, ifuckedupIFUCKEDUP- as ed’s hand comes away from his throat and he’s catching his breath. it’s the little twitches and the minute shift of his feral grin to dawning terror that really does me in. he’s telling a whoooole story with his face journeys and i’m losing my mind

#i could write meta about this but i need another rewatch #and some time to decompress to get the thoughts out because reanalyzing it isn't like #triggering? but it's definitely touchy and edging toward it #tfw the text hits you in the ptsd [grimace emoji] #anyway i reiterate from a previous post's tags #con O’Neill is a master class in microexpression and I’m MAD ABOUT IT #ofmd #izzy hands #israel hands #con o'neill #abuse tw #? idk it feels weird to not tag it

[greenyball]

headcanon: kirby thinks meta knight is their papa

#kirby #meta knight #tfw some baby god decides you're their dad now #kirby of the stars

[soullessjack]

mm ok I have something to talk about finally ! so something I’ve noticed in a lot of discussions/meta around the TFW2.0 family dynamic + cycles of abuse is that it almost always opts to frame jack as a perpetual victim of [sam and] dean’s mistreatment who can’t fight back, and while I don’t mean to say it’s completely without merit, I feel that it does a slight disservice to Jack’s character by always reducing him into a helpless child (even if he is seen as older by the poster) who cannot/should not bear any responsibility in any of his relationships with his fathers.

to start, the cycle of abuse coincides with an imbalanced power dynamic; someone with more or higher power and authority over you (ie parent, boss or teacher) uses that authority to exploit, control, and/or freely mistreat you. i will note that it doesn’t necessarily have to be framed this way to be abuse, like a situation where blackmail grants someone authority over their target; there are also some dynamics that are inherently imbalanced without being inherently abusive (see above examples). the abuse relies on that dynamic being manipulated, not the dynamic itself.

in the majority of posts I’ve seen, the power imbalance between TFW2.0 almost always puts jack at the bottom of the totem pole, in a constant state of victimhood because he’s constantly at the mercy of [sam and] dean [and cas].*boxed these in bc people rarely pick on sam or cas for their transgressions and whether or not they’ll kill him. clarifying again that i understand where this comes from, but I also think it’s a fairly dated perspective on their dynamic that should really be re-examined—especially with Jack’s autonomy more in mind—and i believe @shallowseeker has a post about the exact timeframe of Cas’ death and Dean’s widower arc/mistreatment of Jack that i recommend for it.

but onto my main point, I feel that this representation of their dynamic is inaccurate, and doesn’t really take jack into account beyond the Helpless Child Victim narrative. for the sake of staying on topic let me just summarize a few things:

A) Jack is the most powerful being in the universe and is functionally immortal/unkillable. He is a greater threat to TFW than they are to him, and so he is the one with power in the dynamic, not the other way around. It all hinges on his personal choice to not harm them (because he loves them of course).

B) Jack is and always has been painfully aware of his power, the threat he poses, the dynamic it creates and the underlying tension it constantly causes with his relationships. The majority of his actions and motivations are rooted in his own self-fear, and the determination to prove he’s good/safe.

Another small point I’ll shove in is that Dean canonically never forgave himself for his mistreatment of Jack, and spent almost the entirety of their relationship trying to make up for it (especially in 14x06, 07 & 08). Likewise, Dean’s promise to kill Jack in 13x02 and that scene from Moriah are both often misunderstood as more Textbook Dean Abuse with **Jack’s perspectives (ie: “dean said he’d kill me, and maybe he should,” his admission of guilt and willingness to let Dean shoot him) (also, his choice to forgive dean at some point offscreen) being largely overlooked.

**obviously it’s not healthy or good for Jack to basically consent to being mistreated or killed because he thinks he somehow deserves it, nor does it make Dean’s actions excusable or justified in any way, but i still feel that it’s worth pointing out as examples of Jack’s autonomy and awareness in the aforementioned power dynamic.

Jack’s responsibility is also pretty unaccounted for in these dynamics (especially when it comes to Mary’s death) which I think stems equally from the fact that his soullessness—and by extension, his soulless actions—were caused by Sam and Dean’s actions and the general perspective of him as a child [who doesn’t deserve the burden he carries, and should be carefree], so nothing is directly his fault and nobody can get mad at him either or that’s also seen as unfair mistreatment). I also personally just think it’s odd because Jack in canon is very adamant about being able to take and hold responsibility (as it relates to his autonomy and wanting to be seen as a separate person from his parents). and, going back to Mary, Jack not only becomes psychotic with guilt over killing her, but after his soul is restored in S15, he has a complete breakdown from the sheer horror of what he’s done, and because, in his own words, it’s all his fault.

I won’t go into the worm can of people blaming Dean for how he handled reliving to his root trauma, but suffice it to say: he had every right to be angry, he was well within reason to act unreasonably, and stop trying to fix his conflict with jack by parentifying him with an innocent baby when he already has parentification trauma and that baby is merely an excuse to absolve Jack of any responsibility he had in the conflict.

I will always and forever love the meta side of the fandom, and I honestly owe my blog’s existence to it, but I still think we have a long way to go in terms of how jack is represented/portrayed in these discussions, and likewise, how that portrayal frames/reflects on sam, dean and cas ^_^

#cal.txt #spn #supernatural #spn meta #spn fandom #fandom discussion #tfw 2.0 #team free will 2.0 #jack kline #sam winchester #castiel #dean winchester #sam and jack #dean and jack #cas and jack #dadstiel #also we absolutely do not put cas through the wringer as much as we should #but that’s for another post I think #spn analysis #dad!dean #dad!sam

[darkhopping]

andrew if u see this pls know that u once applied the idea of eigenvectors to scp superweapons 2 years ago and i still think abt it 2 this day . every so often i rember it and im like No Fucking Way brainrot again . thank u

#foundationposting #admonitionposting #tfw axis all superweapons are positioned on or meta weapon ??? somwthing??? yeah that thing #holy shit !! when the admorbius #brainrot isnt limited just to the eigenweapons tbh #ive always wondered what ways logician could be drawn in fanart considering . logician #incorporating like . eigenfaces in2 the drawing somehow seems like a fun idea

[battlekilt]

Time to come clean.

In the recent, oh say, year or so, I've become more of a Rexwalker fan. It was a hard ship for me to consider, for a number of reasons. Anakin's fate makes it hard, but so too does his relationship with Padme. If there is one good thing to come out of it, it has given me an opportunity for self-reflection on my views of Anakin, Padme, as characters, and their relationship.

Slowly, I've come to realize... and accept that...

I don't like AnidaIa. I never have, no matter how much I try. The best I ever managed bordered on ambivalent, though at the cost of any interest in the characters. Not only was their relationship a nail in their coffins in the narrative, it was a nail in their coffins for me. Thus, I am no longer going to hold myself bound to pretend to like or accommodate in my transformative works or content (created or consumed by me) more than I like.

So, while I respect Rexwalker (and others) shippers who say that they still like AnidaIa, I am going to have to be the outlier. I respect the fact that for many, it is their first or among their first tragic-epic love stories. I respect its role in the canon, primarily for it being the mechanism that drives many later points, such as the rebellion and the twins.

I do like exploring where their feelings come from.

Nevertheless, I cannot be convinced that AnidaIa could or would have ever worked out. It is a relationship specifically created for the express purposes of being tragic. While I understand that that is a Doylist analysis, even from a Watsonian analysis, I cannot ever see it working out.

But I just... I can never in an "Anakin doesn't fall to the darkside, things go better" way ever conceive of Anidala working out. It just... it is part of that theme of a tragic tale; their relationship is doomed by the narrative because of the fate that awaits everyone in the prequels. However, they are also doomed by their own actions—by who they are as people.

And that's the thing of it: I like Anakin the character, with all his nasty, flawed, horrific, emotional, tragic, villainized, crunchy bits. I also like Padme. I do not, however, like them... together.

Anakin, which I characterize as wanting a feminine-nurturer in his life, possibly even to replace his mother, wants a family—specifically that nurturer. He wants something that he can grasp onto, call his, count on like a sure bedrock.

Padme had decided to be a political servant for her people, which means she cannot have a family. She's wanted a family all her life. She certainly had a bit of a rebellious streak, which is why they could be said to be alike. While her first instinct in the heat of a moment is to run away with Anakin, she always resettles back down to the priority she has dedicated her life to, the reason why she doesn't have that family she dreamed of: her service to her people.

They hide in their fantasy, they make the other a fantasy version of like a character in a narrative, but they never really know each other… because they aren't even allowing themselves to know themselves.

The two live in two separate fantasies, they just pretend is a genuinely shared one. Mostly, the illusion is upheld when they are together for the brief times they have, because of the brevity of their moments, and the context that thrusts their relationship into a thrilling decision: War.

The war makes everything exciting. They are swept away in the thrill of their forbidden love-story, the rush of adrenaline, the way the mundane through critical obstacles in their relationship is rendered small, but only in comparison to this grand, galactic event… Ultimately, though, they are a bond formed on thin illusions, swept-away emotions, adrenaline, projection, and desperation.

A classic trauma-bond pair, Anakin and Padme's relationship wouldn't have survived long after the war. Not even if the war had ended, Anakin had not fallen to the darkside, I still do not see a possible fate for these two to remain together in their relationship. Something would have burst.

Basically... I've just come to accept that I do not want to pretend to have any interest in transformative works that try to sell me a bill of goods about the relationship of AnidaIa that can be salvaged, nor do I want to comply to the pressure to respect the relationship in my own works. At the very least, I can now definitively say that I will be challenged to present this examination and role creatively.

How does this connect back to Rexwalker? My discomfort at poly Rexwalker & AnidaIa just needed to be examined, and endure the misery of some self-reflection. I assumed it was a 'me-thing' because I struggle to hold any interest in most ships w/o Rex. But, in unpacking it, I realized... nah... it is a 'me-thing' because I just do not like one of the most iconic and pivotal ships in the whole Star Wars canon. Funny that.

I do not know how, but I suspect that Palpatine encouraged little Anakin's growing interest in the public figure, Padme. It made a weakness in the boy grow only stronger, and Palpatine always seeks weaknesses in others for his own ends. As much as he can, he always makes that weakness a more debilitating one. Palpatine is a parasite, who sees opportunities, uses them to his advantage, and will do anything he can do to increase the disadvantage others are placed in for his benefit and only his benefit.

#anti anidala #madam naboo #// tfw you come up with tags for a character that isn't their name or title #// just so your posts don't show up in the tags. #// sorry about it showing up in the searches. #// i tried my best to keep this out of the Anidala tag #// i hope i caught what I could #// i even spelled the L as a capital i #// siiiigh #kilt's meta #bucket's star wars meta #jedi: skywalker #bucket's meta

[shallowseeker]

Dean + rumination

I was saying this on another’s user’s post, and I don’t have all of it set in my head, but I wanted to share it here, too, in case someone can put it into words better than me.

I think Dean's guilt and rumination specifically call it to narrative attention. The consequence? It gets cemented into the minds of viewers, even when that guilt is misplaced. I think that’s why rewatching can be so surprising! Sam’s revisionism…tends to stick.

///

Dean + rumination

When Dean beats Cas in season 10, he ruminates on it. He sees a bloody Cas in the mirror. But when Cas beats Dean in season 5 & 8, we don't see Cas ruminate and agonize over it as much. I know Cas has a flashback about his attack dog spell in season 11, but I can’t recall its specifics. In any case, it doesn’t happen on the first two.

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Sam + abstract guilt

Sam, on the other hand, ruminates on impurity and imperfection—inherent things—so he doesn’t seem to examine his actions as much on screen. If memory serves, after he sacrifices Oskar and unleashes the Darkness, he’s back to lecturing Dean in the very next episode.

///

It’s like how politicians say, “never apologize,” because that “psychologically associates you to guilty in the minds of the people.”

///

Sam seems willing to shoulder more action-oriented guilt as he gets older, and it seems to improve a lot after Mary returns.

Like with Cas, re: unleashing Lucifer, I think Sam is far more culpable for that than his quippy, feisty I’m-not-your-bitch speech would lead you to believe (he moved them to a strategical weak spot, and he acknowledges it). But sometimes he carries this too far, making things a group sin when he’s far more culpable than he’d like.

///

Like with Dean and the MoC, Sam starts to realize that putting yourself in danger, affects your loved ones, like it or not.

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Sam, Dean & Cas + benefit of the doubt

Still, we tend to assume Sam and Cas feel guilt and sadness, even when we don’t see it onscreen. We give them the benefit of the doubt, even when they could be assumed to be cold.

On the flipside, when we don’t see Dean’s grief and reaction on screen, we sometimes jump to assume uncharitably that he must not be doing the emotions. It’s an odd dynamic in the fandom, because we’ve seen Dean’s emotions with respect to specific actions most often.

I think it has something to do with the expectation for him to do emotional caretaking, both in holding the onscreen family together and for the cathartic benefit of the audience.

#shal meta #unpopular opinion maybe #tfw + emotions #dean #tfw + navigating guilt #tfw + teamwork #tfw + battle decisions #tfw + consequences #i was struck talking to a friend that she thought dean and cas beat each other up an equal amount #but cas beat him more often actually!