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understandableparadox · 1 month

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a comprehensive list of everything wrong with hazbin hotel.

quick note before i lose myself in madness, my standards for helluvaboss are non existent because its a free show on youtube. also i kinda like helluvaboss and i will indulge in any bias i damn well please.

oh and spoilers. i guess.

the greater narrative of the entire season is "White lady civilize inner city hoodlum". ex: The blind side. rich girl, affluent family yadda yadda.

the story is set up to be like amphibia, owl house, svtfoe, steven universe, that being starting as something episodic then transforming into story driven narrative. why? because we know the benefits and drawbacks, episodic starts allows us to wander the world, it allows us to understand the dynamics, we are not forced to reckon with anything because there is no deadline. characters are allowed to bloom and shine and the audience can actually get attached.

the source material is Vary Clearly formed from remnants of something out of a middle school edgelord narrative. the usage of transformation, the big spooky grins, the "and then i smile as my eyes glow and-"-isms which in most cases i don't mind because in some instances but in a vary Particular case its astoundingly annoying and that annoyance is like a mold, shit spreads quick.

the color Red. as a lover of homestuck cherubs and karkat and aradia, as someone who fucking loves the color red, it is so painful to say but holy shit tone it the fuck down, i know its hell but their are so many other colors that you can use, its everywhere, the streets, the air, the windows, the screens, the characters, i know the pride ring is represented with red but change up the palates every so often for backgrounds

the rush, this ties into the second point made but i think the story itself is rushed. we know everything way to early. i know way to much and it makes it hard to care about anything because im still trying to digest the last chunk of info. "oh ok, so they clear out hell once a year. oh hell has a heaven embassy? ok. oh that adam the angel, i though he wou- oh its every 6 months now. wait the exterminators die a lot? then why is everyone sca- people in hell already have weapons that can kill angels? w- oh we are in heaven now, ok ma- no one in heaven except for the elites know the exterminations occur? how do-" and its that, just this incessant rush to explain everything to you. notably that's just the god damn spark notes, we need to know everything about the characters now, every single bit of their story, their insecurities, what charlie needs to fix, how she can fix them, the major bad guys, everything. you are never allowed to dwell on a character because we need to rush towards something else. it almost feels like this should have been like... season three, it would have been a fantastic season three if you dropped the introductions honestly.

the concept of redemption. for a story of redemption to work you need to look at three things. What is there crime, Do they want to change, What is preventing them from changeing? there is only one single character that has a notable path of redemption, angel dust, but if you look through their story it feels off. What Exactly is he guilty of? he has sex, does drugs and drinks. his apparent nymphomania is tied to his sad backstory as someone forced into the sex industry so how is that their fault? then if you think about it you start to spiral and notice "hey why are most of these people in hell?" like sure some of them may deserve punishment but then you see the fucking dichotomy and its like "I was a inventor in england and died of the fucking plague, i may have made evil little contraption hoohoohoo" vs "I was a cannibal, a full on cannibal, i fucking killed people and ate them and then someone shot me". ONE OF THESE THINGS ARE A LITTLE MORE FUCKING EXTREME. i'm going to go fucking nuts, the thing they went to heaven with when presenting a case to angels on the idea that redemption and becoming a better person is actually real was angel dust not drinking at a party and not having sex with consenting adults and i want to go fucking insane. WHAT IS THE CRIME, WHO IS THROWING THE BOOK, WHAT DOES THE BOOK INTEL, ARE WE ON GOOD PLACE RULES?! half the cast dont Need redemption they need fucking help, and the other half of the cast do need redemption but they do not seek it making the point moot. sir pentious acts like he has the brain of a hyper intelligent toddler tossing about toys, its almost like he did his one bad thing of spying and then got caught, sank his little diddy about forgiveness and second chances and become a null point through out the rest of the series, sure their was Some weight to him sacrificing himself, he was a decently funny character and he had good moments but him popping up in heaven felt like a fore gone conclusion, he didn't deserve to be in hell so why do i care that he is suddenly in heaven? because its working on the concept the good place already made. no one actually deserves eternal punishment they just need help processing what makes them a dick, but instead of looking at all the parts of the afterlife that make it bad, inefficient and then creating and trying ideas to see if it work instead over a few seasons, we crash dick first into all the major plot points in regards to that and say "tada, we fixed it.".

having a sub-plot about sexual assault and its victims then having multiple sexual assault related gag ruins your point.

don't make a bunch of stereotypically jewish characters into cannibals, that was a big thing, really shouldn't have to say it.

if you are going to make a character black, make them black, you can say alastor was black but sweet seren-fucking-dippity that's not a black man.

pot meet kettle but yeah the cursing could be a little less liberal. maybe just blue hair or the pronouns, not both.

there is a very distinctive art deco/jazz aesthetic which normally i love but i feel as though it is not used to its full extent and in some cases really hurts the character design in and of itself.

this is a vary obvious bit but the story is a million times more interested in gay men then it is of lesbians, which culminates in this insane thing where the writers clearly have more talent or perhaps it would be more abt to say practice writing male gay pining then they are with lesbian pining. which i personally think is hilarious because i did not know you could min max fujoshi-ism that hard.

this next section is more to do with each character on a fundamental level, for the sake of brevity whatever there is left, i'm just doing ones with speaking roles.

13. Charlie:

(see what i mean about that red thing?)

as originally stated charlie fits rather comfortably into every white saviour narrative, though that seems to be part of her joke. though i'm not entirely sure how much of a joke it can be when its rewarded and expected to advance the plot.

her character design says nothing, it has the motif of old puppets or dolls, she wears something vaguely similar to service suits, her demonic form is just some extra horns.not to say every character needs to have their life on a clothes rack but some more snake and goat imagery would be nice

its not the chol design of charlie with snake hair, not an actual problem but its a problem to me, damn you @cholvoq for ruining my ability to look at any of the characters without wishing i was seeing your designs instead.

character wise aside from the white savoir bit, i'm having a bit of trouble understanding what the arc of the character is. she is shown to be naive, someone who doesn't understand how the world works but everytime she says something its something astoundingly clear like "people can actually get better". and its treated like someone demanded faygo in every water fountain. is the joke that the world around her to cynical or is so to naive? please pick one or the other.

now if you know me, you know i fucking hate overpowered characters with a blinding passion, one that would set alit the god damn abyss but in this one special instance, i feel like its warranted, she's the direct descendant of fucking God, she can swing her weight around a little, i mean god damn. she in so many instances looks like shes cowering so often, why would the daughter of lucifer get backed down by some rando pimp? why wasn't she the one to fight adam? sure you can say she is young but how young? her parents were there since pre-abrahamic times, most of the characters showed up in hell in the 1900s, some of them showed up in the 1600s, how old is charlie??? how long does it take for her to learn how to be strong? The story does not suffer if charlie is strong and knows she is strong. it can easily be a case of "i don't believe in violence to a weird degree". fit it into her apparent naivety about the world to believe that violence is never the answer even when dealing with a being that is unilaterally horrible and abusive and monstrous.

she ga- no im kidding, i do think her romance was waysided a bit, it would have been fine to have more scenes of them togather and in love you know?

14. Vaggie

why did you name the lesbian vaggie...? Don't do that maybe?

I like how her design is almost moth like but again i feel as though you could have amped that up.

she feels as though someone tried to combine undyne and pearl from steven universe, same story beats and design elements. it makes it hard to really distinguish her as a character.

i honestly dont have much to say about her. she is fine.

christ kill me, lets just get the big one out of the way

15. Alastor.

God Damn

where to start.

"alastor is mixed race" mixed with fucking what? concrete? there is not a single black feature on that creature, now im not saying you have to make him a png of louie armstrong but it wouldn't hurt to add a curl to the hair maybe? make it a tiny bit more wavy? Something? a crumb i beg of thee?

his symbolism is all over the god damn place, native american monsters (you know the one), voodoo, radio, puppets, stitches, circuses??? and Tentacles i guess. two of those are from closed religions so if you dumped those you would actually get a more concise character focused on the concept of vox populi as a means of societal control and influence as we see in his first song. but again that gets drowned out repeatedly by all the other random toy box bits shoved into him.

tumblr sexy man bait

he serves no purpose in the story. he does spooky stuff, pretends to do things and then goes back to sitting around looking spooky. i understand that his motif is supposed to be aloof mastermind but maybe have him do more mastermindy things? if you remove most of alastors scenes, bar the songs, it doesn't change all to much. husk and nifity can still be at the hotel, they could be looking for outs in their contracts the same as angel dust. hell it even helps with the one scene where he dose some spooky shit, asking charlie for a favor in exchange for his help in the fight with the angels instead of asking him about angel weapons which should have remained a strictly vaggie scene.

his presence in a way delegitimize the story, as I noted in in the section regarding redemption, the three parts are "what is the crime, do they want to change, what is stopping them?" and alastor kinda just spits in the face of that. he is a serial killer cannibal that has no qualms about how evil he is and apparently must continue being evil due to being under the control under someone legitimately called the Root Of All Evil. show him take a slight interest in the idea that maybe shit for him could be better, make him Want Change at the bare fucking minimum or dont have him at the hotel.

his stupid little fucking horns, big shot the troll liker wants characters to have big fucking horns, make them noticeable or dont have them.

he looks more like a dog boy, which could have been an interesting thing with the collar motif but fuck me i guess.

personal pet peeve but i fucking hate characters that have a million plus powers, stick to a set number, be creative.

im getting more petty as i go on so last point: he could have been in less episodes, he didn't need to be in dad beat dad, that should have been just a lucifer and charlie episode. inverse the red and black and i think he would be fucking great color wise, his body type is the same as ten different characters, he isnt radio enough, aside from the voice and and staff if you told me he was the fucking Cat Demon i would have been just as convinced.

16. Angel Dust

what the fuck, gay spider? its hard to actully articulate all the thoughts i have on angel dust, not in the sense that he is a deeply thought provoking character but in the fact that there is not much meat on the bones.

all around i think angel dust is kinda middling. he has a decent enough romance with husk, he has a decent enough story line that revolves around battling addiction and removing yourself from an abuser (which the story tries to brand as "Redemption???")

I dont like that most of his jokes would qualify as sexual harassment, i don't mind him being sexual as a character but continuing on when clearly someone doesn't like the jokes hurts the character.

not a critique but he is pink, which honestly ill fucking take at point, as long as its not more fucking red.

i think his design is an improvement over some of the old vivzie designs but it feels like it could have done with going a few more rounds of design changes.

same thing with alastor, charlie and vaggie, there is not enough of the animal that they are supposed to be. You could have told me angel dust was a fucking bee or something and i would have had to believe you. nothing about angel dust initially says spider, hell he dosent even have enough limps to be a fucking spider.

17. Carmilla carmine

are... are you supposed to be a rabbit...?

Big Yoai Hands

ballet fighting style, could have been cool, wish she fought more like sanji or chun li.

A single mom that works to hard, who loves her kids and never stops-

her song was decent, not great, decent. it feels as though the actress has experience singing but not in the way they tried to make her sing during her two songs. they have a obvious mexican influence, honestly just let her sing in spanish in the english dub. go listen to the spanish dub, "out for love" sounds great in spanish.

i wish i had more thoughts on them, fucking rip.

18. cherri bomb

that's not a punk aesthetic that's 2010s alt

decent character, they showed up once or twice i guess, no real thoughts.

19. egg boiz

absolutely perfect, i have not notes on them, these are perfect creatures.

20. Emily

im so fucking happy to see a singular blue character

does the naive dreamer bit better then charlie

We really shouldnt have seen her until the end of season two or middle of three.

good contrast with the other angels on screen.

Wait she is supposed to be black??? Where???

21. Husk

keith david you absolute delight, Why on gods green earth did they only give you one singing part?

one of the few charecters where its clear husk is a cat, i do like the kinda... marquee design, he is a magic cat, thats neat. i still think you can toss the wings and eyebrows and still have just as good of a charecter.

has a deeply intresting story of someone who died as a nobody, became the fat cat of hell and then was forced back to the bottom by their own vices, not used at fucking all.

huge potential, little pay off.

22. lillith

I know nothing about her except she ditched her kid and husband to vacation in heaven and i think thats kinda funny.

alot of werid things floating around her, again she shouldnt have been shown in the show at all until next season.

23. lucifer morningstar

no notes, funniest charecter, did a song based on friend like me.

few notes: i do like the idea that the immortal symbol of pride is a constant emotional wreckage constantly seeking approval through grand showmanship and manic energy that threatens to take over anything they touch.

would have liked more snake stuff on him, maybe some more goat things like horns.

that is such a stupid fucking staff lmao.

24. Adam.

alex brightman you absolute fucking delight, you should have had more songs.

I wish his design was more focused on the idea of him being a glam rock wash up

I fucking hate his mask

We shouldn't have met him until the end of the season.

25. Niffty

again she is supposed to be a bug or cockroach but nothing about her points to that.

token straight

keeps rocketing back and fourth between sexulization and infantilization

you had kimiko glenn but didnt give her a single fucking song?

26. Sir Pentious

the secret season one redeemed.

the pilot version of him felt more like someone that could do a season one redemption arc, a megalomaniac constantly attempting territory grabs, there is something you can work with, actual character flaws to work through.

essentially a child after the first episode.

actually a snake which i appreciate.

no where near steampunky enough.

27. the villians of the show dont make much sense, each one feels like they should be season long deals on their own instead of a bunch of team rocket esque idiots that show up on occasion, do a bad thing and then leave.

28. Valentino

gOD THERE IS SO MUCH RED

only a moth some of the time.

sucks as a villain, maybe they need more screen time to show why they suck in a more substantial way aside from being told that he sucks.

it is interesting that angel dust is only under his magical control when in the studio, it shows that angel dust has to make a conscious choice to return, which in turn can be made to show how abusers can draw back their victims. I do not think it was done well in this circumstance as it shows him to be cartoonishly evil, constantly flying back and fourth between sweet and utter psycho, there is no actual reason for angel dust to ever actually go back to the studio, he just does so every so often.

29. Vox

legit who cares? the only thing about him that is in any way substantial is all the dope ass fan art we get.

propaganda machine angle that is not explored at all, just hinted at. no actual barring on the story whatsoever.

why didn't he try to do the same shit as alastor by the way? he knows its bad if alastor gets in good with charlie so shouldn't it be a ass kissing race?

same body shape as literally every other male character.

tumblr sexy man version of pyrocynicals fursona.

30. Valvette

the actual poster child of the shows huge problem of "Show me, don't tell me".

apparently the glue that holds the villains together. never shown.

apparently the one that makes the love potions that valentino is famous for. had to learn about that in the fuckin wiki trivias

we know so much about her from things outside of the show.

was there to call carmilla a coward, that's her plot contribution. she shows up every now and again but its never anything substantial and serves to more around take up run time for people We Don't Need To Know Yet.

im not trying to be mean, animation is animation, we need smaller studios to have success in the industry so that other indie studios can have that success, felling a tree makes it easier for others to follow. showing that its possible to number brain rot exacs helps all animators.

but this show has so much bullshit attached to it, it has so much fucking potential that it fries my brain with unyielding frustration.

this took a bit to write, im tired, thanks for reading.

#hazbin hotel

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birbs89 · 29 days

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cool things and interesting stuff I saw in the new spooky month episode and just me obsessing over it lol

WARNING!: major spoilers for the new spooky month episode

I really liked Father Gregor because honestly his design is cool in my opinion and I liked that even though he's a priest who in other shows I've seen are almost always made as good and flawless people but in spooky month Father Gregor still has his flaws especial his flaw with how fast he went to blaming Skid and Pump for being the ones who caused Moloch to be freed (there kinda at fault but c'mon their kids)

also Moloch has to have my FAVORITE design for a demon I've seen in media I love how he has the hooves like one's that goats have since how much goats are associated with demons, I adore the furnace type of thing seen on his stomach, and I like how his hands and claws look

and also because Moloch created in my personal the funniest scene in the episode when he panics when his name is revealed to Father Gregor by Pump

also some things about Moloch possession it seems that he can just posses anyone he decides to posses and that he can also posses and control multiple people at a time and when he is not possessing a body he is either in his demon form or in a liquid form

final thing about Moloch is that I kinda feel bad for him for some reason (I think it's just because of how sad Skid and Pump were when seeing that Father Gregor killed him)

also feel incredibly bad for Dexters mom poor girl had to experience the loss of her son and then be lured and killed by the same demon who was the reason her son died

also can we PLEASE give Lila a break poor girl is going through actual hell

Pumps eyes seem to only be blue when he's in a very dark area

and I think from the implications and things Father Gregor said I think Skids father is dead maybe dying sometime when he was in the cult

love how Ignacio just without a second thought shoots Moloch and I think the scene is a reference to Silent Night, Deadly Night 2 specificality the Garbage Day scene since he shoots Moloch right after putting down a garbage can

also speaking of Ignacio I think he might have been an ex cult member since the picture frame where he's holding the birthday cake I think that might be Skids dad also holding the cake with him and if he is a ex cult member it explains why he's boarded up and barricaded his house since they might have tried to kill him in the past

father of the year award goes to John (also Jack) because of how caring this man is to comforting Skid and Pump when they start thinking they aren't good enough and are a problem to their parents and of how much a good father he was to his daughter

love every scene we got with Patty during this episode (also she's very pretty :])

also thought this guy with the briefcase was a reference to Doug from the Fnaf movie lol

also it's revealed in the ending of the episode seen on the NewGrounds version of the episode that the two thief's and the Candy Dealer are apart of the cult so I guess I was right about them having something to do with the cult in my theory

also we get to see the spider monster we saw in a sketch Sr Pelo posted (can't find and if I did couldn't add it since image limit:[) I think it might be the main villain of the next episode and It seems to be in some way connected with the mannequin/Skids dad from the mannequin theory (if it's cannon idk) since at the end of the episode the spider picks the mannequin up and looks at it

we get to see the The Eyes of the Universe in this episode and I was right in my theory that he was located under the cults mansion since we see the cultist take Father Gregor their to be sacrificed in the end of the episode

also Roy seems to be losing it at this point

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songforeddiemunson · 2 months

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Haunting in Blackwood Hollow

An Eddie Munson x F!Reader Miniseries

Series Summary: It’s the year 1991. Eddie and reader check into a rented house in the Appalachian woods, joined by Nancy, Jonathan, Steve, and Robin. Unfortunately for our gang, things in Blackwood Hollow are never as they appear.

Tropes: established relationship, Jonathan x Nancy, no mention of the events from ST, smut, comedy, fluff, scares, bit of whump (but nothing too crazy)

Series Warnings: Swearing, drinking and weed use, sexual and scary situations, minors please DNI.

Chapter One: Steve's Big Mistake

Chapter warnings: naughty language, mentions of drinking, weed use. This is largely setting the scene babes. Author's Note: Submission for @stcreators Event 5: Dynamics Submission for @somnambulic-thing, @allthingsjoeq, and @bettyfrommars event: strangerprompts (#14) {Okay so I took a bit of liberty with the prompt, but that's just how my brain wanted to do it! You know how that goes. ;) }

Word Count: ~2K

You swore under your breath as the taxi pulled away, leaving you staring at the monstrosity you were meant to be staying in for the weekend.

“This is the last time I leave that jackass in charge of anything,” you muttered, prompting a snort from Eddie, who stood beside you.

You liked Steve. Loved him even, in the way that friends that have known each other for years did, who’d seen each other at their worst, thick as thieves, none of that ‘will they or won’t they’ shit, especially after you started seeing Eddie. But in that moment, you could strangle him.

Most of your group of friends had scattered to the four corners of the country, so when you all received your invitations to Joyce Byers’ and Jim Hopper’s wedding in the Smoky Mountains, you decided to rent a whole house instead of getting hotel rooms. Correction: Steve came up with the idea to rent a house, and admittedly it was a good plan. It would likely be cheaper to pool your resources, and you could all hang out in the common areas and catch up.

And then you saw the house.

It was a stereotype in peeling paint and dilapidated wood. The porch was creaky and appeared to be on the verge of collapse. Gnarled old vines and weeds encroached from every direction; you thought maybe it had been landscaped last sometime in the 1960s. A broken old fountain sat on the front lawn, with a scummy green puddle of rainwater gathered at the bottom, and there was a broken gate that hung loose on its hinges near the drive.

Eddie tilted his head in a manner reminiscent of a terrier as he surveyed the old structure. “I think it looks kinda cool, like that house in IT. The house on Neibolt Street, remember?”

You blinked at your paramour. “Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I want to spend the weekend in a house like that. It’s one thing to read about it in a spooky story, it’s another thing to actually sleep there.” He had the good grace to laugh at that sentiment.

“Fair enough,” he conceded.

Of all the houses in Asheville, Tennessee, THIS is the one he chooses? You thought bitterly as you made your way up the walkway toward the porch, stepping carefully on the worn wood and looking for nails that could be lying in wait to impale your foot.

You had no idea if anyone else had already arrived, and whether you were supposed to knock or just walk in. You had decided to try the former, but your knuckles hadn’t had a chance to make contact with the wood before the door was whipped open, revealing a clearly exasperated Robin.

“Omigosh you’re here!” she cried joyfully as she threw her arms around you. You let your weekend bag drop to the porch as you reciprocated the hug.

“Robin! I’m so glad to see you!” you cooed as you gave her a good squeeze then released her. “But what the hell is this house?”

“Right?! I feel like it’s right out of a Scoobie Doo episode or something. Talk about creepy. Eddie! Hi!”

“I’ve seen worse,” a deeper voice intoned from out of eyesight, shortly before Steve stepped into the foyer.

“Steve! It’s lovely to see you, but what the fuck?” you scolded.

Steve’s expression was so sheepish that you couldn’t help but burst out laughing.

“I know, I know,” he moaned, before putting his face in his hands.

“Come here and hug me, loser. I haven’t seen you in almost two years and you’re gonna make me sleep in the house from Amityville Horror?”

“Hey now,” Robin countered, “The Amityville Horror house was waaay nicer than this.”

“True. Eddie said it looked like the house from IT.”

“Oooh yes! That fits,” Robin said.

“What’s that? It?” Steve asked, never one to embrace pop culture.

You hugged Steve despite wanting to hurt him a little bit. “Nevermind. So what were you thinking with this house?”

“Okay so in my defense the pictures were much nicer in the Want Ad, and in black and white. I didn’t realize it was going to be so…”

“Shabby?” you offered while Robin said “terrifying” at the same time.

“Yeah,” Steve said with a shrug.

Eddie chuckled as he hugged his friends by way of greeting. “Alright well, as long as the bed is clean, I don't really care,” he said. “This one is scared of spiders,” he said, gesturing toward you.

“I am not, you are!” you yelled.

“I am NOT afraid of spiders,” Eddie replied defensively. “It’s those fucking centipede things with all the legs. I hate those things.”

You rolled your eyes. “I’m sure there are plenty of things in this house to trigger all our phobias.”

The interior was a little less gloomy than its exterior, but that wasn’t saying much. The common room in which you were standing was decorated in 50 year-old wallpaper that was peeling and yellowing. The floors were hard wood but hadn’t been refinished since the wallpaper was installed, and the dusty old upholstery was flat and worn around the edges.

“Where are we sleeping, anyway?”

“There’s three bedrooms, one with a queen and two with a pair of singles. I figured we could draw straws or someth–”

“Dibs on the queen!” Eddie shouted.

“Eddie, we have to–” you began.

“Nah babe. We’re a couple, and we got here first. You snooze, you lose.”

“I think that’s fair,” Robin said with a shrug.

“Nancy and Jonathan won’t love that,” Steve said. “But you can fight it out amongst yourselves. I’m staying out of it. Looks like you’re bunking with me, Robin.”

“I don’t care, as long as you don’t snore.”

Nancy and Jonathan arrived about an hour later, and while they weren’t thrilled to be relegated to a pair of twin beds, they conceded that Eddie did in fact call dibs.

“I feel like we’re eighteen again,” Nancy laughed as she explored the kitchen for a clean glass for water. “Calling dibs and bunking up together. Feels like old times.”

“It does,” you agreed from where you were leaning against the counter. “I don’t know if I would use any of the dishes in this house though.”

“I might just make a store run, get some solo cups and paper plates,” she said as she put one grimy glass back in the cupboard with a look of distaste. “Any requests?”

“Oooh, cheez-its, snapple peach tea, pizza pretzel combos…”

“PBR,” Eddie contributed as he sidled up next to you and bent to give you a quick peck on the lips.

“Well of course,” Nancy said with a smile. “Can’t forget the beer.”

Robin poked her head into the room. “Grab a couple of pizzas! I’ll give you cash.”

You all pitched in for the snacks and sent Nancy on her way as the sun began its descent behind the trees. The rest of you gathered in the living room to figure out what to do for the night.

“Care for a toke?” Eddie asked, as he held up a joint he pulled from his jacket and set it alight.

“Yessss,” Jonathan replied with enthusiasm, leaning forward to pinch the little joint between his fingers.

“That didn’t take long,” Steve said with a roll of his eyes.

“Lighten up, Harrington,” Jonathan said in a fragrant plume of exhalation, stifling a cough. “You could probably use this more than the rest of us. You’re too wound up.”

“It’s true Steve, why are you always so stressed out?” you asked, taking a pull from the joint.

“I don’t know, I just feel like I’m the responsible one–” he began, but was cut off by a chorus of jeers and naysaying.

“You think you’re the responsible one, but everyone knows it’s Nancy,” Robin said, laughing.

“Yeah man, like…the King Steve days are over, you can stop trying so hard,” Eddie added with a grin.

“Okay, okay, I get it…” Steve said, accepting his ribbing with a modicum of grace. His voice trailed off, however, as his attention was pulled in another direction. “Hey what’s that?”

“What?” you and Jonathan asked at the same time, following his gaze.

“It’s on top of that bookshelf…” he began, already getting up and walking toward it. He had to stand on the tips of his toes to reach it, and pulled it down, unleashing a cloud of dust and grime.

“What is it?” Eddie asked.

Steve brushed the dust off the cover before looking up at you with wide eyes.

“It’s a ouija board,” he said.

“Oh shit,” Eddie said, laughing. "You can't be serious."

“What! No, no thank you!” Robin yelled.

“I dunno man, you might want to put that back and pretend you never saw it,” Jonathan added with a smirk.

“What, nah, that stuff isn’t real,” you said.

“No, it’s not,” Steve agreed. “It’s just a silly game.”

“If it’s just a silly game,” Eddie taunted, "why don’t we take it for a spin?”

“Oh man, no, don’t give him any ideas,” Robin piped in with her trademarked ‘mile-a-minute’ cadence. “Did you see the movie Witchboard? Well I did, and I didn’t sleep for a week afterward. Too scary for me. And it’s kinda weird that that thing just shows up in the spookiest house I’ve ever seen, and we’re in the middle of nowhere and…”

“What’s Witchboard?” Steve asked.

“Dude, watch a movie…” Eddie moaned while Jonathan doubled-over laughing.

Steve laid the box down on the coffee table. “Well, just because there was a movie about these things doesn’t make them real. The Princess Bride isn’t exactly real either.”

Eddie gasped with mock incredulity. “It’s NOT?”

“Have fun NOT storming the castle I guess,” Jonathan tried to say without laughing, which came out as a choked squeal.

“Inconceivable!” you yelled, making the entire room erupt in hearty laughter and dispelling some of the unease that had grown since the discovery of the ouija board.

“Jesus guys, are you that stoned already?” Steve asked with a smile.

“Eddie only buys the good stuff,” you said.

“Zero to zooted within three hits, or your money back,” Eddie said before taking another pull from the joint.

“Good to know,” Steve said sarcastically. “So are you guys gonna play with this thing or not?”

“Fine fine,” you said. “Eddie, let’s do this.”

He agreed, and you sat on the floor on either side of the coffee table. You opened the box, took out its contents, and each placed the index finger of your right hand gently on the planchette. You sat silent for a moment, not doing or saying anything, unsure of where to begin.

“Uhhhh,” Eddie said before dissolving into giggles.

“Ask it something!” Robin whispered, leaning forward in her excitement.

“Okay, uh…” you began, pausing to think. “Is there anybody here with us right now?”

It seemed like the entire room held its breath with anticipation.

“Is there anyone here in this house?” you repeated.

The silence ticked onward.

“Well this is thrilling,” Jonathan said with a snort.

“Give it a minute,” Steve said.

“Thought you didn’t believe in this stuff, Stevarino,” Eddie teased.

“I don’t, but–”

You thought you felt the planchette move ever so slightly.

“Wait!” you gasped. “Did you feel that?”

“No, wait. Maybe?” Eddie whispered.

You sat motionless for a beat, but nothing happened. You began to think that it was your imagination when…

….suddenly the front door banged open with a loud smash, and every single person in the room screamed like a banshee.

“Jesus, guys!” Nancy said as she struggled to hold several brown paper grocery bags. “A little help here?”

“Oh fuck, sorry babe,” Jonathan said, and the rest of you sheepishly got up to help, leaving the ouija board on the table. You bustled into the kitchen to put things away and pop open cans of beer, laughing about the silly jump scare you’d all just shared.

What none of you saw, however, was the planchette on the ouija board slide over to ‘hello.’

To Be Continued...

Sorry this one is short, but I needed to get it out. More is coming! As always, comments and reblogs are the lifeblood of every fic writer!

PART TWO MASTERLIST

#eddie munson #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson series #spooky story #stranger things fanfic #strangerprompts

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caw-oticdork · 9 months

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Since my previous podcast recommendation list was pretty popular, I've decided to make another, with another bunch of excellent podcasts:

13 Minutes or Less - Short podcast with very short episodes, about a pizza chef who doesn't like dealing to people but has to do some deliveries due to short staffing. Very much not her thing, but she does her best. As it turns out, her clients are quite a bit stranger and spookier than expected...

Additional Postage Required - Sci-Fi adventure about a nonbinary courier who gains the ability (or curse...) to get visions about the contents, past, and sender of packages they touch. They get roped into a rebellion. There's hoverboard racing. It's awesome.

Among the Stars and Bones - A team of xenoarcheologists search a distant world for traces of a long-vanished aliens. It's been a while since I watched this one, so I don't remember it very well, but I know that I enjoyed it. Very good sci-fi horror.

Dark Ages - Fantasy workplace comedy about a supernatural museum. Quite a lot of fun.

Dragon Shanty - Fantasy story about two bards traveling the high seas. There's dragons aplenty. Very queer. Excellent songs.

Falling Forward - Hacker story loosely based on the myth of Icarus and the Labyrinth, about getting back at a terrible corporation. Kinda experimental, this one has the shortest episodes I've ever seen.

Hotel Daydream - Podcast about the goings-on at a supernatural hotel. Very inventive, with really interesting characters.

Jar of Rebuke - Mystery about a researcher at an ominous cryptozoological organization out in the rural US. He's got no memories of his past and keeps dying and coming back. A story about cryptids, identity, queerness, neurodivergence, and community.

Light Hearts - Slice of Life podcast about turning an old, haunted building into a cafe and queer community center. The ghosts lead to some very fun shenanigans.

Lost Terminal - Mentioned in the other list but not expanded on. This is a hopepunk story set on an Earth devestated by climate change. Told from the POV of an adorable AI who watches this Earth from a space station, observing how humanity re-builds itself and finds a brighter future.

Mayfair Watchers Society - You know Trevor Henderson? The guy who drew Sirenhead, Long Horse, and other such creepypasta creatures in his found footage style? Yeah, this is a horror anthology based on his works, directed by him. Set in the rural town of Mayfair, where strange creatures are a lot more common than elsewhere... Each episode has a slightly different framing device, with some being found footage audio, others meeting recordings, phone calls, etc.

Monstrous Agonies - An advice podcast for the british creature community. Many of the advice letters are sent in by listeners - there's two by myself, one from an ant that can hear and send radio and one from a fey who is looking for curse advice. Some letters are metaphors for queerness, clashing cultures, ableism, and minority communities, others just some urban fantasy fun. Has a little bit of plot, but most episodes have an anthology style. Fast approaching the finale!

Mx Bad Luck - Slice of Life about someone who is cursed with bad luck. Sometimes sad, sometimes funny. Can recommend.

Neighbourly - Neighbourly follows the residents of Little Street, house by house. What they do, how they interact with each other, and what skeletons are hiding in their closet. Starts out as a spooky urban fantasy thing that's almost an anthology, but weaves itself into quite a mysterious plot over time...

SINKHOLE - Short-form audio podcast presented as a collection of audio posts from a member of a community of data restoration hobbyists in a sometimes-unfamiliar future. Mystery about disability, internet communities, and how things change with time.

Second Star to the Left - Scout-explorer Gwen Hartley has five years to explore and prepare her planet for settlement. With no aid but her robots and the anxious voice of her long-distance scout-minder Bell Summers in her ear, she's hoping she's ready for anything.

Someone Dies In This Elevator - Anthology where every episode, someone dies in an elevator. You wouldn't believe how creative they get with that simple concept!

Tales from the Low City - By the maker of Mistholme Museum, this podcast explores the everyday lifes of the last people on an alien world, after the surface had become uninhabitable and everyone had fled down into the last city, the subterranean Low City. This one made me cry a lot!

Tartarus - In a secret facility deep beneath Antarctica, an anxious astrobiologist, a terse station manager, and an AI keep humanity safe from the monsters they imprison.

The Attic Monologues - Queer urban fantasy story about a university student who decides to record themself practicing monologues using a collection they found in their attic. Don't forget to listen to the post-credit scenes!

The Bridge - Surreal alternate universe horror story about the keepers of a bridge over the Atlantic. Gets pretty spooky.

The Green Horizon - Sci-Fi comedy about a na'er-do-well Irish space captain and his rag-tag crew traversing a war-torn galaxy in search of fame and fortune. Very fun podcast.

The Lavender Tavern - Anthology podcast with original gay fairytales. Most are quite memorable!

The Vesta Clinic - Sci-Fi story about a clinic that helps various interesting alien lifeforms with their medical issues. Excellent worldbuilding and characters!

Tides - The story of Dr. Winifred Eurus, a xenobiologist trapped on an unfamiliar planet with hostile tidal forces and a fascinating ecosystem. She must use her wits, sarcasm, and intellectual curiosity to survive long enough to be rescued. But there might be more to life on this planet than she expected...

Hope this list is as helpful as the last!

@boombox-fuckboy @marvelousmawn @sapphireclaw @ashes-in-a-jar @frogmomentsfrombeyondtime @time-is-restored @emmy-noethers-rings

You folk seemed the most interested in the other list, so I'm being bold and @ing you all.

#podcast recommendation #podcasts

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zeephyre · 2 months

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CRITICAL ROLE CAMPAIGN 3 EPISODE 86 SPOILERS

RAHHH, SPOOKY LAKE MINI ARC!!!!!!

God. I fucking love you Matthew Mercer.

The back door is indeed a back door and while that is exciting, I honestly need us to table all theories.

First of all, Matt really did his big one with this campaign and all of the spooky horror elements that are scattered all over. The nightmare king, Laudna, Jrusar tbh, Uthodurn and the Savaliir woods, the creepy ass monsters and gjosts we keep running into, the GHOST PIRATES, the fucking shattered teeth as a whole, RUIDUS, and now this fuck ass lake.

The way Matt slowly built up the suspense and the intrigue of this odd abandoned town that started as just curiosity and location discovery to help us understand where in Exandria they were, and then slowly became an investigation into how...empty it was despite no signs of struggle or even a mass exodus to somewhere safe... and then the notes about the disappearances... how people were rumored to have just...walked into the water.

GOD IT WAS SO GOOD.

The way my heart dropped out of my ass when Liam used the stone to talk to Dorian (I don't wanna discuss that "I miss you" that definitely felt like an "I love you", I'm so upset rn Robbie please come home). I knew the stone wikldnt work because he'd already talked to Caleb (which !!!!! CALEB!!!!!!! AHHHH) but then Matt was like "you hear something outside, it's Dorian" and I just???? Almost shat myself when I understood what was happening.

It is...interesting that whatever is in that lake only affected FCG, Orym, Chettie and Ashton.... it can't just be that they weren't women because... that doesn't really make any sense so it must be something magic related? Because they were making charisma saves and the witches have either max charisma or amazing fucking charisma. (But so does FCG? I think? Whatever).

I loved everything about that battle and the lake but I especially loved Laudna's whole deal... Dread Pirate Queen Laudna fan art needs to flood my social media feed so much that I get sick of it (I wont). She's such a silly little guy I love her to bits. (We won't discuss she who must not be named except to say... she was kinda spitting during that whole later interaction)

FINALLY THESE DUMB FUCKS SLEPT BUT GOD. I WAS CONVINCED MATT WANTED THEM DEAD FR.

ANYWAY. JESTER. JESTER LAVORRE. JESTER HAS SENDING. SHE TALKED TO US. SHE TALKED TO IMOGEN. THEY’RE EITHER ON THEIR WAY TO THE KEY OR TO THE LAKE AND EITHER WAY I KNOW WE'RE GONNA SEE THE NEIN AGAIN IDC IDC

Kinda almost broke down in tears when Jester spoke to Imogen because I just??? love Laura Bailey so much??? AND WHENEVER THE OTHER PCS SHOW UP I JUST GET SO HAPPY

I know Jester is being a terrorist with sending rn, and I know she's gonna message Imogen constantly.

Did not want them to leave that lake until Kiki's group showed up the next morning but my hellians never listen to me so cest la vie.

(Also????? Fearne and Chetney romantic tension??? Let's discuss. Let's also discuss how bad Fearne wants to kiss Imogen)

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twilighttrekkie · 28 days

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‼️Warning: Spooky Month Spoilers Ahead!!!‼️

just watched the new spooky month episode and. wow. i'm so normal (lie) i cannot wait for the next episode aaaaaaaaaaa

ahem. anyways. the part with the priest asking where skid's father was and skid looking so crestfallen and the part with pump asking "but if they love me, then why're they never here?" had me bawling /lh waaaaa skid and pump are so sweet, they don't deserve to feel so sad 😭😭😭😭 ANYWAYS. I AM EXCEEDINGLY NORMAL ABOUT KEVIN AND I'M SO HAPPY THAT HE GETS AN ACTUAL FRIEND TO WORK WITH. Here take my Kevin and Radford screenshot collection because they're incredibly pfp-able AND THEIR EXPRESSIONS ARE SO FUN HERE.

OK CAN WE (and by we i mean me) TAKE A MOMENT TO TALK ABOUT THE ANIMATION FOR A SECOND. BECAUSE HOLY SHIT. IT JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER!! IT STARTED OFF AS ALREADY GOOD IN THE FIRST INSTALLMENT, BUT NOW IT LOOKS COMPLETELY PROFESSIONAL, INCREDIBLY FUN, AND CERTAIN SEQUENCES ARE STRAIGHT UP BREATHTAKING.

ALSO MOLOCH AND EYES COMING BACK??? LIKE HELLO?????? THERE'S SO MANY CALLBACKS IN THIS ONE, LIKE SKID AND PUMP LIGHTING THAT HAPPY FELLA ON FIRE IN THE STORE, DEXTER BEING MENTIONED, THE CULT REAPPEARING, OH AND CAN I JUST SAY THE SEQUENCE WHERE MOLOCH POSSESSED ALL THOSE DIFFERENT PEOPLE WAS SICK. THE DESIGNS WERE ALL REALLY FREAKY IN THE BEST WAY POSSIBLE, SHOUT OUT TO WHOEVER MADE THOSE DESIGNS!!!

admittedly i kinda wish we got to know more concretely whether streber is actually dead or not, but i completely understand putting it off to build suspense. that's literally my only criticism of the episode rn lmao and even then it's more of a personal curiosity thing than something i actually have against the episode

10/10 episode: much like every other spooky month episode i've had the pleasure of seeing as it came out instead of years afterwards, it has permanently changed my brain chemistry 🔥 guys if you're spooky month fans pleaseee go watch the episode. and if you have no idea what this show is, go check it out, it's completely free to watch on youtube!!! it starts off very shitpost-y, but quickly gets very dark (while still keeping the humor that made the first 2 entries special!! Spoky Month evolves more and more with each episode, but never loses its roots, which is something I really enjoy).

#dri's rambles #spooky month #sr pelo #spoilers #spooky month spoilers #spoiler warning #long post #very long post #spooky month skid #spooky month pump #spooky month kevin #spooky month radford #spooky month moloch #eyes of the universe #ok screw this i refuse to tag every character lmao #i love them all but i just don't have the patience for that #spooky month hollow sorrows

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theweirderstuffblogdontlook · 5 months

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Big scary man encourages anxiety riddled party pooper to play with power tools. It does not go well for him. Showin yall the first event in the timeline where Bob actually gets spooked by Caprica.

Back at Bob's house from the start of the Tender Treats spooky month episode. Bob's decided he's moving in with Caprica in her big luxurious house, so he's packing up some of his things to bring to her place. Ya should be able to tell it's pretty early in the timeline since he's wearing his spooky month outfit, has shorter hair, heavier eyebags, and slouches more. At this point, he hasn't fully recovered yet from his resurrection, and is still felling a bit sick, sore, and out of shape.

Bob's excited about gathering up his tools, and when they're both excited, especially over a similar thing, it kinda amplifies how fun an activity is for bob. So Caprica getting excited over the chainsaw, then kinda stamping down those feelings because of being so anxious and self conscious a person. it kinda just gave Bob a bump of enjoyment then snatched it away. And Bob's a reckless enough person, he's not really thinking ahead, he just kinda wants her getting excited again cus it makes things more fun for himself.

This should actually give yall some extra context for the previous comic with bob deciding not to get drunk with the fancy whisky. When she shows all doe eyed and excited in her stance in that comic, it actually startles Bob little bit and gives him cause for concern. And now yall should have a better idea why. That cutesy innocent look is often actually her excited for murder look. and here we get to see Bob learn that the hard way.

#spooky month #bob velseb #art #inner demon #possession #au #comic #spooky month bob

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doodlesartstuff · 1 month

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Welp I'm kinda stressing out now 😅

I'm getting extremely excited for episode 6 of spooky month but i'm also scared about episode 6, considering how in the trailer the kids looked upset in some scenes

WHY ARE THE KIDS IN A COP CAR?!

Patty is possessed and I'm kinda scared that she might die in the episode

and the old lady in the trailer, we barely even know anything about her but some theories said she might be Dexters mom and the old lady followed "Patty" and now I'm scared she'll die too,

don't get me started on the stressed looking Lila, Why is she stressed?! Who made my mother figure upset?!

WHO MADE HER UPSET TELL ME WHY SHE'S UPSET 😭

Also WHAT DOES THIS PICTURE MEAN?!?!?! WHY ARE THE PISTURE OF SUSIE AND PUMP'S PARENTS SO CLOSE TO THE SCREEN?!?!? DON'T TELL ME THIS EPISODE IS ALSO GONNA BE ABOUT PARENT ISSUES

AND WHAT DOES IGNACIO HAVE TO DO WITH THIS?! we already made theories that he might be part of the cult NOW I'M WORRIED

Now i'm just thinking of worse case scenarios and I'm starting to cry because of these worse case scenarios....episode 6 hasn't even released yet and I'm already stressing out.

#spooky month #spookymonth #spooky month 6 #i'm crying #i'm excited #i'm scared #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #I swear if Patty dies-#*cries in a corner*

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dobercorgis · 7 months

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It’s spooky season so here are some webtoon recs

apologies in advance for the low quality images some of them are locked behind paywalls now (on the kr app the translated ones should be fine) and I was too lazy to go through all the chapters for the good panels

Ghost Teller- I’m so biased but this is one of my favorite webtoons. Summary in one line: ghosts go to therapy

Real summary: various ghosts (s1 is eastern ghosts, s2 is western ghosts) tell “human stories” (like how we talk abt ghost stories lol). the art is amazing, and all the episodes are all pretty solid. even if some stories are predictable you still feel for the characters (although personally I prefer s1 over s2)

Sweet Home- some of you might have seen it on Netflix but whether you watched it or not I highly recommend the webtoon (I have issues with the adaptation but that’s another story)

basically people suddenly start turning into monsters and the survivors of this apartment try to survive together. except the mc shows signs of becoming one of those monsters which creates unrest amongst the survivors. not going to get too into the monster part bc spoilers but the webtoon explores what people would do for survival so you get to see scummy ppl, kind ppl, all trapped together and try to survive 👍

the art style captures the story’s spooky/horror vibe so well. I didn’t include Bastard on the list (the previous webtoon the same author and artist worked on) bc it’s more of a psychological horror/thriller than creature? horror but if it sounds interesting or you liked sweet home I highly highly recommend Bastard as well.

+) There’s also a prequel called Shotgun Boy that’s more about the creatures’ origins

Surviving Romance- despite the title there’s little to no romance although it can probably be read as sapphic if you’d like. if you read makeup remover it’s by the same author. I’ve also seen some people compare this to orv but I can’t speak for that since I haven’t finished orv… haha

one line summary: mc gets isekai’d into a romance novel except it suddenly turns into a zombie apocalypse

long summary: mc is the mc of a romance novel but on the day she’s supposed to receive a confession from the male lead, there’s a zombie outbreak. she already read the novel so she knows the story and characters, but literally everybody that’s not the love interests don’t like her bc that’s how the mc of the novel was written. she finds out that the day resets when she dies but she doesn’t really care until someone she doesn’t know the face of saves her and she decides to find that person and make sure they make it out alive

even if you don’t like isekais (I personally don’t) it’s worth a try. it plays around the isekai premise well and the fourth wall moments were just *chef’s kiss* the impact of those moments especially when the webtoon was still ongoing was 🤌

the cast is primarily female characters, and despite the cast being on the slightly larger side, each of them are distinct from one another and the characters designs are very cute and colorful. overall it has an unique premise that it delivers pretty well on

Night of Shadows- kinda underrated tbh. mc has prophetic dreams, creatures from her dreams start appearing irl, and she’s the only one that knows how to deal with them.

mc is great. she’s strong, smart, and knows when not to give a fuck. the other three characters of the main cast are also pretty strongly established, and the plot and pacing are pretty good. this is the only one on the list that’s still ongoing (currently on hiatus after s1)

#did they rlly censor the middle finger? yes they did kr censorship just be like that sometimes #the webtoon fandom is so niche compared to mangas and anime fandoms so I don’t think this’ll reach a lot of ppl #but if you’re ever bored give them a try :D #I’m very aware these recs are me going dw just trust me #but please dw and trust me (not too much tho)#misu.txt #ghost teller #sweet home #surviving romance #night of shadows #webtoon

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darlinboypresley · 2 years

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lotta true crime

pairing: serialkiller!austin x reader

summary: serial killer Austin kidnaps reader who has a podcast about true crime with her friends cus she saw something she shouldn't

trigger warnings: mentions of murder and well death kidnapping Stockholm syndrome.. mentions of various serial killers talk of blood and knifes psychotic thinking... and smut in the next chapters last but not least my shitty writing

authors note: AAAH HALLOWEEN KICK OF HERE WE GOOOO it's spooky month so here is serial killer Austin on the way to make you all swoon. hehe hehe please i swear i'm sane and honestly if you cant handle this subject please leave it and don't pay anymind to it

special tag: @asshlyyyyy

Part 2 here

It was currently 3 am in down town LA and Austin was out looking for another victim. He couldn’t help it he never understood what was wrong with him and after a while he stopped caring he liked who he was. Even if that meant he hurt people it made him feel some type of way….

He knew it was bad and that he shouldn’t feel that way but he does and that damn podcast wasn’t helping one singular bit. He didn’t care about her friends he would’ve killed all of them in an instant if they were ever to cross pads but her….

It was all about her. He put on the latest episode of your podcast. It usually started with your friends bitching about men like bundy….. or Ramirez…. But you… you seemed to understand him. He sighed as he heard your friend speak up again

“I mean I hope this doesn’t seem to impolite but Ted Bundy was just never that fucking bright he was just sorta charismatic and white and he was so fucking sure he had the right but he’s ugly and I’m glad he’s dead because there was no fucking candle in his pumpkin he wasn’t special for winning his game with women who never even played they could’ve have killed him.” Her annoying voice ran trough his air pods…

and then you spoke up “well I mean I’m sure it went deeper than that I’m sure there is a more psychological reason your missing here… he had a pattern and I-“. You were cut off again by your other friend.

“There’s a new killer in town…” she said as Austin looked up from his phone a bit surprise… could it be “they call him the butler killer or something he prints out anything bad his victims do.. and then he sighs it “butler” that’s all that’s it…* she said and Austin smirked ever so lightly to himself.. they were talking about him he waited for your response kinda nervous as if your opinion really meant something to him.

“Hm… butler killer” you hummed and he smirked to himself. He never met you but he just felt connected as if you knew what he was thinking the whole time and then he heard you speak up again.

“Hm so he kills people who like kill or hurt others… there’s gotta be some good childhood trauma for that..but he isn’t big enough to talk about in the media … yet interesting “ you said and Austin smiled proudly to himself. He was proud of you, you were his clever girl even tho you don’t know that yet.

If you were thinking in theorie which he knew you did you’d probably be on your phone googling what ever you could find about him. Your friend her annoying voice ran through his headphones again as he let out a low groan.

She just needed to run her mouth again as always if she wasn’t careful enough she might get herself killed one of these days…. “So what does this guy do? Does he kill butlers” she laughed that annoying laugh.

He heard You sigh softly and speak up again “no amber this article says that the killer leaves business cards at the crime scene with the name butler on it and the sin of his victims on the back of the card, police hasn’t found any other evidence at the crime scene whatsoever” you read to them ever so effortlessly from your phone.

As Austin smiles proudly to him self of-course his little bunny wouldn’t disappoint.. and of course he wouldn’t be stupid enough to be leaving evidence behind you see. That’s one thing he didn’t have in-common with other serial killers whatsoever his work didn’t get sloppy. He always made sure to wear gloves and hide his face.

The sound of your voice died out for a bit as your friends went on and on.. until you spoke up again “he uses a knife.. “

you said “there have been no signs of gun powder and no one ever heard a bang so my theory is that he uses a knife to avoid brains flying around… or any organs seeing that’d leave a bigger mess than a knife he likes to prevent the mess from happening he’s a clean killer.. also his name… maybe it’s not about who he kills he kills people who sinned here cheating wife… fraud ect ect I don’t think he’s a butler tho maybe maybe it had something to do with his name” you said.

He smirked at him self that was his clever girl he agreed with your theorie about the knife seeing ge never used a gun because of how loud it would get and it’s more traceable Austin liked working clean. He wasn’t like others he had feelings he knew how to feel hurt and sad and angry.

But what about Happy….. in full honesty he hadn’t been happy in a while… it had been a long long while since he had been happy.

And the theorie about his name was even more brilliant. You did your research he’d give you that much. He leaned back in his car seat putting his feed upon the dash board. As he listened to your voice once again.

“It almost seems like… like he’s following the 10 commandments honor your father and mother his first victims were two teens who set up their parents for their money and then his second victim was a neighbor who gave a false testimony against another neighbor…. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor and here… cheating wife found dead while lover was still inside her … thy shall not commit adultery… and the most resent one was a man who stole billions from the company he worked for… thou shalt not steal” you said as your friends spoke again.

He was kinda dumbstruck honestly it was like you knew all of his moves all his thoughts that’s why you were his bunny you understood him… if he wouldn’t know better you’d be a killer yourself.

But he knew nothing more than your name and that you went too the same college.. he spoke in your criminology class a view times your professor mentioned your podcast. That’s how he found his bunny but you wouldn’t remember him for the life of you. And he knew that

At around 4:00 o’clock the podcast ended and that’s when Austin spot his next victim a boy about 19 years old who killed a little girl in a hit and run… thy shall not murder so it was Austin his time to make him pay. Little did he know you were walking home.

You walked through the alley way he was in just about to finish it he took his mask of. As you approach them your blood ran cold.

Austin looked up quickly and cursed to himself before you could let out a scream he grabbed your waist and pulled you. Around the corner his hand covering your moth and the tip of his knife. Pointing into your stomach with a bit of pressure

“Wouldn’t scream if I were you little bunny.” He whispered in your ear. And the last thing you felt was a hit to the head and then everything turned black

But little did he know that one night would change his whole life…

this is halloween everybody make a scene

part one out of 5 of lotta true crime let me know what you guys think

love j xxx

#austin butler #x reader #austin butler imagine #austin butler x reader #elvis movie #austin butler fanfiction #elvis 2022 #austin butler elvis #austinbutler!elvisxreader #elvis presley #austin butler smut #austin!elvis #austin!elvis x reader #austin!elvis smut #halloween #serial killer austin

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kindalikerackham · 1 year

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The Black Sails Drama Highlights™️

Like, what the fuck happened over there?

Lucky for you, I was there on the ground floor (even sent in some propaganda that elicited a truly baffling response from the poll runner) because I'm a nut for goofy little tumblr polls and a nut for best little lesser-known-tv-show Black Sails.

Alright, so. @/pirate-battle (from here on out referred to as OP -- the Original Pollster) was running, as one might expect, a pirate bracket. At first glance, it wasn't explicitly presented what the criteria were, so people voted on their preference, often moving along pirate icons (Hook from Muppet Treasure Island)/characters from active fandoms (TAZ), etc etc you know the drill. (Although they later clarified they were looking for favorites, not the "best pirate.")

OP's first mistake, I think, was the assumption that a silly goofy little tumblr competition about characters archetypically ungovernable would remain silly goofy and with minimal strong language.

But this wouldn't become visible until they made their second mistake, creating a first-round poll between James 'brutually murdered a crewmate in the first episode solely to maintain power for his revenge-quest against England' Flint of Black Sails vs Stede 'notable used tissue' Bonnet of OFMD. They did recognize some of the coming danger even with that post, tagging "#I predict slaughter in the tags"

O Apollo, strike down these children with prophecies that bite them in the a--

Anyway. Predictably, there was slaughter in the tags. Violent language rather typical of the tumblr that I came from (the tumblr of the early 2010s), but seemed to be utterly shocking to some OFMD fans.

Exposition time: It should be noted here that there exists at least two-ish different kinds of users of tags. Those that use them to scream personal thoughts into the void and/or whispers into their mutuals' ears, and those sneaky little fools who will peruse everyone's personal little screams/thoughts to their internet buddies. And original posters are relegated to suffer the yelling/whispers without choice.

So that slaughter, in the tags, those rivers of blood through the whispers of a fervent fanbase of a violent and freeing queer show, did reverberate around other users, regardless of etiquette.

And for some of those very sweet very uwu our flag means gay fans, that was.. very scary. (Must be all those spooky theatrics with the smoke and mirrors).

(....Idk??? Maybe I'm just battle-hardened from superwholock, but saying a tag a la "AHHHHHH I'm going to rip something's head off my BOY BETTER WIN" just doesn't really phase me?? Nor does "#I'm literally going to k/m/s if x wins." Overkill? Yeahhh... But this is tumblr. We invented overkill for the media we like. And again, this was in someone's tags.)

Moving on, as tags of that violent nature starting pulling through, and people started vigorously defending black sails as a franchise over ofmd, myself and others sent in some propaganda of my own, urging OFMD fans to really understand that Black Sails is mostly incomparable to OFMD and... Black Sails is just kinda better. Cuts deeper. Genre difference at work here.

Soapbox Side Note: Black Sails can actually be kind of game changing, especially for a show that came out in 2014. There's so much to say about it but it's hard to talk about without spoiling. I might add a link to a good 'things to know' post if you're looking to get into it.

Anyway. OP was starting to lose it.

Like, I really just don't think they had mentally prepared for how truly feral Black Sails folks were/are about that show, and how they were willing to get all HRRRRRRR CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP about it.

Additionally... OP was white, and they were super duper unprepared to engage with any of the discourse about racism that these shows dig up (They're about pirates, and a lot of pirates engaged in the slave trade. Or had freed slaves on their crew. Some even owned slaves themselves. It was complicated and pirates are typically a white fantasy vehicle and anyway I'm getting off-track--)

OP started to really fan the flames with more and more visibly emotional responses

They said "it's not a competition" between the two shows, despite it... being a literal competition...

They called people out for "gatekeeping," but didn't really define what it meant in the context of saying one gay pirate show was way better than the other.

They told Black Sails fans not to express negative feelings towards OFMD on the internet (because good representation is the god us internet queers pray to, and we wouldn't want some network exec to say "oh those mean people on the internet, better not renew the popular pirate romcom" obvi)

After some more of this, they then threatened to overturn the results of the poll entirely and remove Flint from the poll wholesale, despite the fact that he had won. (Which is hilarious if you know anything about Flint in Black Sails. He's literally That Guy That Makes People Break Democracy Attempting To Unseat Him).

Finally, after a day of trying to ignore the fact that they'd become a meme within black sails circles (one post even screenshotted then with "new copypasta just dropped" yikes), they threw in the towel. And bless them, I do think they needed the break. They were kind of going through it.

In conclusion,

The Black Sails fans pulled what I might even daresay to be,, , a fuckery "of censorship and fear",, over OFMD fans and some poor unprepared poll runner who had no skin in the game, while using only strong language and some mild mean-spirited memes (95% of which in their own tags and posts).

#black sails #poll drama #pirate drama

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