#tom blake cosplay

[thefallenbibliophilequote]

I don't understand celebs, if i had the money for a fancy dress and cosplay, i would go all out and dress according to the theme bc it is FUN like a Halloween party but with more class and money

Especially this year! Gilded Glamour. They had a good excuse to look like royalty! From 2 centuries ago!

Only some ppl got it right tbh. Blake lively, Vanessa Hudgens, Dua Lipa, Chloe Grace Moretz, Tom Holland...

#met gala 2022 #loki is posting

[dailylogyn]

Logyn Meta: Loki & Sigyn’s relationship in the Marvel Comics

Photo Source (by Sexy-Salmon): https://lokisergi.tumblr.com/post/70164902295/siege-loki-problems-it-almost-looks-innocent

Other Logyn Meta’s: https://dailylogyn.tumblr.com/tagged/logyn-meta

Did you know Sigyn was in the Marvel Comics long ago? Did you know Loki had a wife? 

Oh...that’s probably because Marvel wanted you to forget their terrible writing mistakes concerning this great Norse Couple. 

Let’s dive into this exploration of history where the Marvel writers realized they fucked up on telling a perfectly good couples story, and in the process, setting off a spark of rebellion that caused some retconning and a group of fans to demand justice for both Loki & Sigyn -- not just as a couple, but as their own individual beings. 

#JusticeforSigyn #JusticeforLoki #JusticeforLogyn

Where it First Began (Meeting & Marriage of Lies):

In September of 1978, Thor #275 came out featuring the first appearance of Sigyn, Loki’s wife from Norse Mythology. She was introduced as a beautiful Asgardian Loki had randomly come across while looking into a crystal ball inside his castle, wanting to find some companionship to fill his loneliness. 

However, when Loki came with riches and jewels to offer her in exchange for her hand in marriage, Sigyn outright rejected him, stating she would never take someone as vile as him, even stating she was already engaged to an Asgardian Warrior part of Odin’s guard -- Theoric. 

Unable to accept this, Loki came up with a plan to have her fiancee killed during a mission, resulting in the Trickster taking on the disguise of Theoric in order to take Sigyn for his own. Despite having slightly suspicions of her lover being more romantic than before, Sigyn didn't notice that her lover wasn’t exactly who she thought he was.

Now comes the day of the wedding as Odin marries the happy couple. This was when Loki finally revealed his true self and what he had done. Odin tried to null the marriage, but it was against Asgardian law for even the High Father to do such a thing. Hence, Sigyn accepted her fate as Loki’s wife. This caused Odin to name her the Goddess of Fidelity. 

Where it’s Heading (Cargo of Incantation-Fetter’s Arms):

Loki being Loki, he did some shit that ended up with him being imprisoned in a tree by Odin, something that infuriated Sigyn, resulting in her trying to take control over Donald Blake to use over the All-Father as a way to free her husband from his punishment. However, it didn’t work out, resulting in a bunch of other crazy shit happening and putting Thor on their trail.

After Balder was killed, Loki was put on trials for his crimes and received yet another punishment that Sigyn had to protect him from -- having burden over the fact she was “the evil’s wife.” Just like the classic Norse tale, she holds a bowl over his head, shielding him from snake venom and leaving to empty it momentarily when it became full, resulting in Loki cursing her. 

Also, Loki and Sigyn had a child -- Narvi, but they died young, being used as the binding to imprison Loki (following the Norse myth too.) 

Some more crazy shit happens and now Odin has shackled Loki to Sigyn so he doesn’t cause anymore trouble. Loki of course is not pleased about this one bit. Having had enough of this, he went to Odin demanding to be released, only resulting in him being banished to an outpost. 

There Just Might be Hope????:

Some more shit happens again, resulting in Loki being stuck in an astral form and bound to a suit of armor so he could reside in Asgard thanks to Sigyn. A fight happens with Thor, Loki and Mephisto, putting Sigyn in danger. This is when for the first time ever, Loki ends up having a tender confession of love over Sigyn, asking Thor to save her since he could not.

It’s unknown if this is just Loki putting on an act or being real, but you know how the Trickster God can be. 

After the battle, while Loki had released Sigyn from her marital vows, his wife swore to always be there for him when he needed her.

And that’s the last we see of Sigyn’s regular appearance in the comics in 1996. She makes a cameo in Avengers: Unleashed #1 in 2019, but it’s nothing more than a flashback to her time of helping Loki. 

A Hypothesis & Notes on their relationship in comics:

The whole entire plotline consisting of Theoric and Loki killing him in order to obtain Sigyn is just something most of the fandom doesn’t like. Not only does it objectify Sigyn, but it makes Theoric a Pointless character to introduce anyway, only used as a tool for means in which Loki can get Sigyn, when honestly, he could have done so in a different way.

I like that they stick with Sigyn being the faithful wife of Loki (that’s who she is), but they honestly don’t give her any agency in this besides that trait alone. The writers don’t even let Sigyn be her own damn person! She is SO MUCH MORE than Loki’s loyal wife. SHE IS A FREAKIN GODDESS! I know there is more we can do with her.

Instead of pulling the ‘woe is me, my husband is evil and I’ll just go along with it’ card, something else could have been done. LIKE LITERALLY, ANYTHING ELSE! We know Loki can be a troublemaker, but Sigyn knows how to deal with his shit. She isn’t some damsel in distress here! It’s another reason Loki likes her.

Couples can bicker in times, it’s normal in marriages and relationships, but to have Loki whining about how much of a burden Sigyn is is just....WHY? I mean, you went after the woman and killed another guy for her. This is what you wanted! *shakes head at writers*

I will give them kudos though for some of the stuff near the end when Loki actually starts displaying his true feelings of love towards Sigyn. And sadly we only got a little taste of that...and we aren’t even sure if it was an act or Loki being real.

THE FACT THAT SIGYN ISN’T EVEN IN THE COMICS ANYMORE SINCE 1996. She’s only mentioned, but it’s just as a tale, not as an actual person who USED to be his wife. They literally killed her off. EXCUSE ME! #JusticeforSigyn (We’re still waiting for her in the MCU...)

NORSE MYTHOLOGY TIE-INS:

There were some moments in the comics between them that they writers took from Norse Mythology with them. Thought It’d be important to list.

Loki’s Punishment of snake venom dripping onto him while Sigyn holds a bowl to collect it and shield him.

Narvi being Loki & Sigyn’s son who was killed and his insides used to bind Loki for his punishment.

Sigyn being Loki’s wife. 

DIFFERENT WRITERS, DIFFERENT CHARACTERIZATION:

As is the case with everything out there, if you have different writers working on the same project, there is bound to be a difference of characterization and interpretation, resulting in OOC moments or just something completely different altogether. After researching and pondering on this subject, I FULLY believe this is what has happened with Loki & Sigyn’s relationship in the comics. Let’s take a look at the evidence I’ve found:

For the comics Sigyn’s creators were Roy Thomas, John Buscema and Tom Palmer. 

Loki’s creators for the comics were Stan Lee, Larry Lieber, Jack Kirby, Violet Barclay, and honestly, many others.  

My favorite quotes on them from the comics:

Wait? Despite the crappy writing, I actually have quotes I like from the comics? GASP! I call these the only positives from the comics of their relationship. 

“My Sigyn-- the love of my immortal life...” — Loki, Thor Annual Vol 1 #19

“Aye-- For only Sigyn, of all in the realm eternal, feels love for Loki. And among all Asgardians, only for Sigyn does Loki feel...” — Loki, Thor Annual #19

“Sigyn loves me-- just as she is the only thing in the nine worlds that I truly love.”— Loki, Thor #483

Photo Source: https://www.zerochan.net/1262293#full

Fandoms Wish for MCU & Future Appearance Justice:

Fans would like to see Sigyn make an appearance, not only in the MCU (Marvel Cinematic Universe), but also the Marvel Comics once again. They would like to see Loki & Sigyn’s characters done justice with proper writing, especially regarding their relationship with each other. 

This is why there is plenty of fans out there writing Fanfiction, making Fanart, Roleplaying and even Cosplaying them, giving their interpretation’s of what their relationship would be like. This is THE VERY REASON this blog and @sigynappreciation​ was created to help spread awareness and unite fans who feel the same way. 

These characters are very near and dear to our hearts. Some of us even worship them in our religions. We would like to see their relationship grow and portrayed in a way that helps fill the pieces of the missing puzzle to how they came to be in Norse Mythology. 

CONCLUSION:

Although their relationship in the comics usually leaves fans grimacing, at least we got to have it explored. Who knows if Marvel will ever touch anything with them ever again, but at least it’s brought together a small community that continues to go strong -- and honestly, that kind of unity is what Loki & Sigyn would want. 

So imagine to your hearts content! Draw that fanart! Write those fanfictions! Dress up in that cosplay! Be those characters! But just remember, you have a family here to love and support you. 

SOURCES:

Sigyn’s info on Marvel Database: https://marvel.fandom.com/wiki/Sigyn_(Earth-616)

Loki’s info on Marvel Database: https://marvel.fandom.com/wiki/Loki_Laufeyson_(Earth-616)

Sigyn on Marvel Universe: http://www.marvunapp.com/Appendix/sigynthor.htm

Logyn on the Shipping Wiki: https://shipping.fandom.com/wiki/Logyn

Loki & Sigyn’s relationship through Media: https://www.alehorn.com/blogs/blog/norse-mythology-loki-and-sigyn

#logyn #loki x sigyn #loki and sigyn #Marvel Comics #Loki Laufeyson #sigyn #logyn meta #Constancy & Chaos (Logyn) #justiceforsigyn #justiceforlogyn #justiceforloki

[sewingpatches]

I got like three personal projects in the works, not to mention two commissions waiting on me, but yeah let’s just start a 4th project….

#dishonored #whalers #I wanna be Billie lurk #tho I'll be fully covered so rip me #will probably pick up a witch cosplay for summer time fun #blake will be daud. loren will be corvo. hoping tom does gender bent Emily #Billie the Lurk

[circular-time]

First Day of UnearthlyCon aka LIWho, John Hurt edition (Because officially it's not @lidoctorwhocon)

Various phonecalls for Paul McGann

Randomly hanging out with or failing to find @timehorse who was cosplaying Ian and @paradoxymora and @thefirstintimeandspace who were cosplaying Ben & Polly cosplay (see next post)

Hanging out with Sue the Sarah Jane cosplayer who's my age, an older Whovian from Philly I should have known growing up

Photographing a few cosplayers but not too many whoops (There's Stuart who always cosplays Five)

Attended panels with Frazer showing clips of himself acting with Charlie Chaplin when he was 10 (among other thjngs), Katy being hilarious and talking about Pertwee at 100,

and Lou looking absolutely stunning in white and talking about various bits of her career -- I didn't realize she was on the original Omega Factor -- as well as a drama program she ran for troubled teens for a while. Also her work on Tenko which she is justly proud of, many other shows good and bad; she's just wrapped up recording another season of ATA Girl and is writing a historical "Leela & Tom" Big Finish script

I went to a 2 PM painting activity with Katy Manning which was advertised as us painting a picture of Bessie, which I didn't really care about, but I thought Katy would be a lot of fun. Katy didn't know we were supposed to do a picture of Bessie, and also didn't know that there was somebody there to be the instructor, so she took over and did an art therapy class, and we had a show and tell at the end. SO much more fun, even if I was slightly baffled by acrylics.

I wound up with a migraine by evening because I didn't drink enough (or have lunch), but it didn't matter because we had dinner for the master plan holders and I finally got to sit across from Louise Jameson, whom I've never got to talk to for more than a moment at the autograph table. Wide ranging conversation about everything, and of course I can only remember the point when we got out our phones and showed each other our cat and dog pictures, because that's what's important?

Stopped by a Very Abbreviated cosplay contest with about ten contestants? Including Barbara-Yetaxa and a teeny tiny baby dressed as a Pting. And Amanda rocking Yaz.

Unfortunately I've been standing in line too much so I was tired and couldn't make it to any other events after dinner (there wasn't much I wanted to go to except for the traditional "Fuck Yeah ____!" 11pm drink & wake which has honored the Brig, William Hartnell & Pertwee in past years and this year was for Blake's 7.

But FirstinTimeandAce and Paradoxymora came up after dancing and drinking to have cocoa with me in my room while I was resting so yay. And we talked about Jacqueline Hill and William Russell and Debbie and Big Finish recasting (yay and Nay) until 1am.

OH. AND Tina has given me a smol soft Fivey so last night I was allegedly sharing a room with Eight and now I've got Five in bed eat your heart out Mary Sue!

#an unearthly con #liwho #liwho 2019 #doctor who day

[allnewalldifferentwildspider]

Top 5 Characters I HATE That Everyone Else LOVES

There are characters that you find that really just pop for you. You see their designs, hear their voices, become enchanted with their stories. You want to follow them and see where it all leads. You just love spending time with these characters.

This is the opposite.

These are the least favorite ingredients in your favorite dish. Every time they come on the screen, you groan. You whine, piss, and moan. Or more specifically, I do. I’d love to change the channel and do anything else than watch stories with these characters. Problem is they’re usually in some of my favorite shows. 

And the worse part is, I’m the only one who thinks so. Everyone else can’t seem to get enough of these guys. Because of their popularity, they won’t leave me the hell alone. Constant fan art, edits, long essays about how great they are, topping polls, being in WatchMojo lists, etc. So here are the top five characters I hate, but everyone else seems to love.

RULES: These characters have to have fanbases that greatly outnumber the people who dislike them. If they do have a well know hatedom, that doesn’t count. If they do and they’re on the list, it just means I personally haven’t heard of them.

DISCLAIMER: Despite the title, I’m not here to pick a fight. If a character you like is on this list, that’s kinda the point. Don’t @ me. Don’t get triggered. And most importantly of all, please don’t try to argue with me. If the show they came from couldn’t get me to like these characters, some text on the internet isn’t going to have better luck. That’s their fault. Not yours. I repeat, this list is NOT a personal attack on you. I just need to get this bullshit out of my brain so I don’t keep thinking about it.

5. Sasuke Uchiha (Naruto)

I don’t like it when people are given a free pass for being horrible human beings and I don’t like it in characters either. I haven’t personally heard any rumblings from the Naruto fandom, but I remember back in the day, everyone loved Sasuke. No matter how many times he tried to kill the heroes, they were still more than ready to welcome him back. His heel-face turn was because he didn’t know the meaning of empathy? Give me a break. But everyone gives him a pass because...edgy boys?

First he was a terrible teammate. Then he was a terrible husband. Now he’s a terrible father. He’s just...terrible.

4. Nino Lahiffe (Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir)

No deep meaning for this one. I hate his stupid design. I hate his stupid voice (Diskin!). I hate his stupid actions. I hate that he’s paired with Alya. I just don’t like him. But evidently I’m the only one who has a problem with him.

Just call it personal taste.

3. Tom Lucitor (Star vs the Forces of Evil)

This is a big one for me. Again, I hate it when people give characters a free pass for doing something terrible. Tom wanted to curse his ex-girlfriend Star into loving him (and all that it entails, including sex) without her knowledge, will or consent for the rest of her natural born life and I’m the only one who’s upset about it. And that was plan A. Plan B was to exploit her fears about becoming queen. 

And he still gets her back for 544 days IRL. Too damn long. If someone tried to force you to love them, I bet you’d give them more than just a punch in the shoulder. But no, he gets a free pass because (again) edgy boys. Fuck edgy boys and fuck you for liking them.

Pieces of trash.

2. Tina Belcher (Bob’s Burgers)

This one is just like the Nino one but taken up to eleven. The only other thing I can add to this entry is my confusion. I get that other people wouldn’t have a problem with Nino because he’s relatively harmless, but with Tina, I’m just confused. You all like this? Like, a lot? I don’t get it, and I don’t want to.

(Dis)Honorable Mentions

These guys were on the list until I found out that other people hate them too. This list is characters that everyone else loves, so yeah, disqualified.

Blake Belladona (RWBY)

I don’t like RWBY, but I did love Yang. She was my #1 waifu for a good long time. But then the fanbase shipped her with Blake who is just the worst. She’s whiny. She runs away from all her problems. It disgusts me that no one else has a problem with Rooster Teeth having a very adult Adam Taurus being with a very underage Blake. She didn’t know that she was sucking terrorist cock? Other people hate her too, but I know how to fix it: Reboot RWBY.

What? Reboots are popular now.

Kirito (Sword Art Online)

For the longest time, I couldn’t stand that so many people cosplayed as him. I decided to see what the big deal was since SAO was anime of the year at the time.Seriously people? 

‘Check me out everyone. I’m just your average guy, but all the girls want to have sex with me because I’m so good at video games. Oppai, loli, and everyone in between. They all pine over me because I was a beta tester.’ 

I’ve heard of stupid reasons for a harem, but this tops it. It’s a harem show pretending to be an action show. And pretending is just another word for lying. Luckily as time passes other people has seen how terrible he is, but man that was a trying few years.

1. Katsuki Bakugo (My Hero Academia)

I don’t get it. He’s the biggest asshole in the world. Yet, you all are okay with it. He told the main character to kill himself in the first episode. You all are okay with it. He called Uraraka fuckstick. Yet, you ship him with her. He has the worst attitude. You are all okay with it. You like it. You like this? I guarantee you if anyone treated you this way IRL, you wouldn’t like it.

I don’t get it.

Thanks for reading. Who are five characters you hate that everyone seems to love?

#katsuki bakugou #my hero academia #sword art online #kirito #Blake Belladonna #rwby #tina belcher #bob's burgers #tom lucitor #nino lahiffe #Sasuke Uchiha #naruto #star vs the forces of evil #miraculous ladybug

[rwbyconversations]

RTX RWBY Panel Day 1

We’ll have two more of these for RWBY, same news will be at all of them but Q&As will be different.

RWBY panel naturally fills the room.

RWBY Girls, Miles, Kerry, Gray, Paula. Miles is cosplaying as David.

Panel opened with a Chibi episode, “Evil Dreams.” Stream didn’t get it because we can’t have nice things.

Tom Alverado (Chibi writer) was in the audience.

More Chibi panels on Sunday. Kerry promises new things (maybe they’ll actually be on screen -_-).

Volume 6 premiere in theaters on October 25th, as was leaked yesterday. Some Volume 5 will be shown to pad out the runtime. Firsties get it October 27th.

Gray talks about the Viz Manga anthologies. These were made by the RWBY Japanese community. Ruby one already out, limited quantities of the Weiss manga are now in the RT store, on sale from August 21st, Blake manga available from November 12th, Yang in Q1 2019. Barbara complains about how the Yang stuff always comes last.

New manga announced, is gonna be a graphic novel version of V1 and V2. Different writer than the one who made the trailer adaptations, published in Shonen Jump.

RWBY: After the Fall by EC Myers is the Scholastic novel we heard about a few weeks ago. It focuses on Team CFVY a year after the Fall of Beacon, training at Shade Academy in Vacuo(!), but then they go defending refugees and deal with the Fall of Beacon and everything that came before. Set for Summer 2019. They specifically mention Fox.

New Jazzwares toys. Volume 4 and 5 RWBY outfits. They look like Funko pops I hate them. Metallic variants of Beacon JNPR. Also include Qrow, Oscar, Raven, Volume 4 Cinder. Dust Rock Candy. New calendar. Wireless headphones. Drinking stuff.

New clothes now part of the Forever 21 Anime Collection. Also in Target and Hot Topic. Gamestop socks.

RWBY Songs in Rock Band. This Will Be The Day confirmed, two more coming soon.

New Amity Arena trailer, it’s on Twitter. Glynda was spotted in it.

New Grimm Eclipse. PJs from Volume 1. New Horde mode, campaign and game mode. More DLC afterwards including PJs for RWBY and JNPR (including never-before-seen ones for Ren and Pyrrha) and the Volume 4 outfits. More announcements coming soon.

New Character Short. It’s about Adam and should be out in the next two weeks. 

Miles basically admitted that the Volume 5 shorts took time and money away from Volume 5 proper.

They’re “Starting to slow down” on the White Fang plot, but Adam’s not gone yet.

Barbara: “The slogan of the season: Will we see Adam’s face Volume 6.”

“As far as writing goes, we’re in a lot better shape.” By RTX last year they were wrapping up chapter 8, this year they’re at 13. They’re writing them out in chunks and getting other people in-house to beta read it.

New Yang art by Ein Lee. Other RWBY art will be in the next few months. It’s being done in reverse order (seemingly to spite Barbara). 

Something about Fair Use from a guy who makes a crack vid. Gray gives general advice regarding copyright.

How hard has it been to continue RWBY since Monty died? Extremely. Barbara would like it in general if people stopped asking Monty questions at panels.

What if RWBY got the Infinity Gauntlet? Lindsay: Let’s just say half my team would be gone in the snap of a finger. Barb: Ruby I don’t feel so good! Miles thinks Jaune would fuck up so bad with it. Gray: I’m never gonna look at that Pyrrha shot the same way again. Yang would think Ember Celica is better.

How do you edit an episodic script? - Start at the big season-wide level, break it down into a scene level and start writing. With Volume 6 they have a new approach of doing it in batches that flows better and lets them edit better. Miles still seems to like looking for cliffhangers- “would this actually create a really cool cliffhanger if we switched this around?” Sometimes you just have to scrap something.   

My friend @rubblesrose was at the panel! She was the one who said “Moist.” Bless her heart. For writing, what’s been the most surprising thing for when you read the script/had the idea for the moment? Lindsay thought Ruby’s truama in volume 3 was interesting. Barb- Adam cuts Yang’s arm off. Kara- when Cinder impaled Weiss. Arryn teases that something shocking was in volume 6, “It’s so cool! And shocking!” Miles has an idea from volume 1 that’s finally showing up in volume 6.

Over the course of these years, what’s changed the most about you? Lindsay: I’m a mom now. Lindsay wins the question. Gray is also a dad now. Arryn moved to LA as a result of RWBY.

Arryn stole toys to hand out to the audience like a feline Santa Claus..

Favorite and least favorite parts of making the show? Lindsay: Waiting. Miles hates waiting, but loves doing the punch-up sessions with the other new writers.

Favorite thing to record? Lindsay liked recording Players and Pieces. Miles liked Jaune yelling at Cinder. Kara liked Weiss yelling at people in volume 4. Barbara liked the volume 5 finale where Yang yelled at Raven. Paula liked Teenage Faunus Ninja Catgirl. Arryn loved talking to Ghira. Kerry liked the volume 3 finale.  

New RWBY Co-Director. His name is Connor (he’s the android sent by Cyberlife).

NO SHIPPING QUESTIONS PRAISE SATAN

#rwby #rtx 2018 #rtx austin #rwby panel #lindsay jones #kara eberle #arryn zech #barbara dunkelman #miles luna #kerry shawcross #gray haddock #paula decanini #rwby grimm eclipse #rwby amity arena #rwby volume 6 #rwby adam character short #rwby chibi #scholastic #team cfvy #coco adel #velvet scarlatina #fox alistair #yatsuhashi daichi #infinity gauntlet #rock band #jeff williams #casey lee williams #adam taurus

[thecomicsofsolitude]

Sensational She-Hulk Vol. 1 No. 3 (1989) Synopsis for "My Guest-Star,...My Enemy!" Spider-Man is following the buzzing of his spider-sense, which leads him to an unused factory. Spidey wonders what could possibly be so dangerous here, and then he spots Mysterio leaving the factory. Mysterio gets into a car and drives away. Spider-Man shoots a web-line onto the car, and follows along! Published: 07/1989 Editor-in-Chief Tom DeFalco Cover Artist John Byrne Writer John Byrne Penciler John Byrne Inker Bob Wiacek Colorist Glynis Oliver Letterer Jim Novak Editor Bobbie Chase James DiGiovanna Appearing in "My Guest-Star,...My Enemy!" Featured Characters: * Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 2]] She-Hulk Fantastic Four Vol 1 328]] Supporting Characters: * Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 2]] Louise Mason Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 4]] * Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 2]] Blake Tower |linkSensational She-Hulk Vol 1 4]] * Web of Spider-Man]] Spider-Man |linkMarc Spector: Moon Knight Vol 1 2]] Antagonists: * Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 2]] Mysterio Spider-Man: Mysteryio Manifesto Vol 1 3]] * Headmen * Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 2]] Arthur Nagan Web of Spider-Man Vol 1 73]] * Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 2]] Ruby Thursday Web of Spider-Man Vol 1 73]] * Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 2]] Jerry Morgan Web of Spider-Man Vol 1 73]] * Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 2]] Chondu the Mystic Web of Spider-Man Vol 1 73]] * She-Clone (Only appearance)[1] #thecomicsofsolitude #comicsofsolitude #comicbooks #comicbook #comic #comics #marvelcomics #dccomics #actioncomics #marvel #marvelstudios #marvellegends #marveluniverse #stanlee #dc #dcuniverse #dcextendeduniverse #dcfans #marvelfans #instagood #shehulk #themanofsteel #superman #supermansuit #love #cosplay #cosplayer #cosplayersofinstagram #superhero https://www.instagram.com/p/CSi5FFKrXt9/?utm_medium=tumblr

#thecomicsofsolitude #comicsofsolitude #comicbooks #comicbook #comic #comics #marvelcomics #dccomics #actioncomics #marvel #marvelstudios #marvellegends #marveluniverse #stanlee #dc #dcuniverse #dcextendeduniverse #dcfans #marvelfans #instagood #shehulk #themanofsteel #superman #supermansuit #love #cosplay #cosplayer #cosplayersofinstagram #superhero

[theultimatefan]

‘Smallville,’ ‘Firefly,’ ‘DC TV’ Q&A’s, Cosplay, Creative Panels Head Programming At Wizard World Madison; Most Included With Any Admission

Q&A sessions with the casts of “Smallville” (Tom Welling, Michael Rosenbaum, Erica Durance and Laura Vandervoort), “Firefly” (Jewel Staite and Sean Maher) plus DC Comics TV stars (Vandervoort and Teddy Sears) and A Nightmare Before Christmas standouts Ken Page and Chris Sarandon, cosplayer and comics creator sessions, adult and kids costume contests, live podcasts and more highlight the programming offerings at Wizard World Madison, Friday through Sunday, October 25-27 at the Alliant Energy Center. Most programming is included as part of the standard event admission and is in addition to the live entertainment options (dancing, music, etc. hosted by Kato Kaelin) all weekend.

And for the first time in Madison, the world famous Wizard World Costume Contest (Saturday, 7 p.m.) will feature a $12,500 prize pool, including $10,000 for Best in Show.”

Some highlights of the more than 50 hours of panels scheduled to date include:

Group panels with “Smallville” (Welling, Rosenbaum, Vandervoort, Durance, Saturday, 1:30 p.m.); “Firefly” (Staite, Maher, Saturday, 3:30 p.m), The Nightmare Before Christmas (Sarandon and Page, Saturday, 4:30 p.m.); “Bringing DC Comics To TV” with Vandervoort, Sears (Sunday, noon); “Women of Sci Fi & Fantasy” (Dichen Lachman and Kelly Hu, Saturday, noon); “Voice Acting Master Class” with Hu and Page (Sunday, 1 p.m.)

“I Love the 80s with Zach Galligan (Saturday, 11:30 a.m.) and “Acting for the Stage and Screen Masterclass” with Galligan (Saturday, 4 p.m.)

Pro wrestler Kevin Nash dishes on his favorite ring promotions (Saturday, 2 p.m.)

Creator sessions with industry superstars Joe Wos, Mostafa Moussa, Jeremy Clark, Kurt Lehner, Ron Mars, D. Whitaker and more

Fan- and industry-based panels on subjects ranging from Pro Wrestling 101, “Nerdprov,” Foam 101, Geek Trivia, Behind the Scenes at a comic con, Robots and A.I., Harry Potter, investing in comics, Black Panther, comics law, supervillains, D&D Improv, getting published, creating comics and more

“Blake and Sal Show” recording their popular podcast live

Kids programming all three days, including free sketches, face painting, create a Halloween bat and more

World-famous Wizard World Adult Costume Contest, Saturday at 7:30 p.m. and Kids Costume Contests on Saturday and Sunday at 2 p.m.

Cosplay with special guests LadyDragon Creations, Papa Bear Cosplay, AYA Cohen and more, throughout the weekend

Unless noted, programming events take place in the designated General Programming Rooms or show floor stages at the convention center. VIP tickets or additional costs may apply to ensure access to select activities, as noted.

A full list of Wizard World Madison programming is available at http://wizardworld.com/programming-entertainment/Madison (subjects, guests, times and rooms subject to change).

Wizard World events bring together thousands of fans of all ages to celebrate the best in pop culture: movies, television, gaming, live entertainment, comics, sci-fi, graphic novels, toys, original art, collectibles, contests and more. The 12th event scheduled on the 2019 Wizard World calendar, Madison show hours are Friday, October 25, 4-9 p.m.; Saturday, October 26, 10 a.m.-7 p.m.; Sunday, October 27, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Kids 10 and under are admitted free with paid adult.

For more on the 2019 Wizard World Madison, visit http://wizd.me/MadisonPR.

[centerofstupidity]

Petra Pan Chapter 1 Part 1 Snark

If you enjoy the content you are reading, please like and follow the Center of Stupidity blog.

Chapter Summary: Our story begins with Eirwen Darling participating in a fencing tournament. 

Of course, we are constantly reminded every five seconds that he is a saintly guy with awesome sword fightin' skillz.  Which means Eirwen must be the Chosen One.  

Nota Bene: Even though the story only has nine chapters, each chapter is very long. So I have decided to take each chapter and break them up into several parts. 

“En garde…ready…fight!” the judge called out to the two fencers that were standing in the field of play in the middle of a large hall.

The first sentence in and I’m already cringing.

The line “that were standing in the field of play on the middle of a large hall” is awkwardly worded.

The sentence can either be “En garde…ready…fight!” the judge called out to the two fencers that were standing in the field of play 

OR "En garde…ready…fight!” the judge called out to the two fencers that were standing in the middle of a large hall.

Eirwen Darling’s opponent - Thomas Paisley - 

He is also known as Character Who Disappears After Chapter One

So Thomas moves forward and lungs his foil at a guy named Eirwen. 

Eirwen deftly parried the attack,

I'd expect a fencer to be competent.

 and was about to riposte when loud, overzealous female cheering coming from the stands distracted him.

This isn’t Eirwen’s first competition.

And he is an athlete.

Which means that he should be able to tune out the screaming fans and focus on the game.

Also, every fencing match is timed. So…

“Darling! Darling! Darling! My Darling! My darling!” the girls all chanted in lovesick voices.

The tips of Eirwen’s ears turned red out of embarrassment 

and he groaned.

"Attractive girls fawning over me is such a drag!"

 “Ugh. What do they think they’re doing? This isn’t a basketball game!”

Eirwen, fans usually cheer at sporting events.

Why are you acting as if this is Abby Normal?

Just because this is a fencing match, doesn't mean nobody applauds or cheers. 

Look at this video: 

This is the 2010 Junior Fencing World Championships in Azerbaijan. 

Every time that someone scores a point, you can hear applause or cheering. 

His fan girls were there again. 

A lot of heterosexual guys would feel flattered with receiving female attention. 

But this sends Eirwen running for the hills. 

Is he Edward Cullen in disguise? 

He glanced at them out of the corner of his eyes and immediately wished he hadn’t.

Eirwen saw someone cosplaying as Anita Blake. 

 His flush started to spread to his cheeks. 

Blushing appears on a person's face. 

It turns out the Eirwen's fangirls are holding banners and posters that say things like: ‘Do your best, my Darling!’ and ‘I (heart) Eirwen Darling’.

Eirwen hated that his last name was ‘Darling’.

You mean bitching and moaning isn't a sign of contentment?

Thanks for letting me know, KuroKoneko Kamen!

When the girls called out to him it sounded like they were using a silly pet name.

I'll let this speak for itself:

And with the way they were looking at him lustily he had the feeling he was right on the money.

Congratulations, Eirwen.

You have five more brain cells than Bella Swan. 

The reason that Eirwen Darling had fan girls in the first place

No, no, no!

Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. 

was because his great grandfather Eirwen Darling was famous for being the inspiration behind the popular children’s book: Petra Pan.

...

........

.......................

................................................

That's right, gentlepersons. Girls are lusting after a guy because one of his relatives was the inspiration behind a famous children's book. 

And it gets even more creepy. It is revealed that Eirwen has a strong resemblance to his great grandfather. 

So when people pictured the boy who’d been spirited away to Neverland by Petra Pan for a series of grand adventures - 

Yeah, it's simply whimsical that a child was kidnapped by a sociopath. 

And in case anyone thinks I'm joking...

Here is an interesting article that cited quotes from J.M. Barrie's Peter Pan. 

they usually pictured the boy with Eirwen’s face.

Eirwen looks like his famous great grandfather. 

Eirwen’s great grandfather was dead now, but people never seemed to forget the connection.

At the risk of sounding redundant, I'll say it again:

Eirwen’s current opponent 

Thank you, Captain Redundant. 

and close friend, Thomas, 

This character is a friggin' McGuffin.

Without him:

Eirwen would have never fought a psychopath. 

Petra Pan wouldn't have witnessed a duel and decided that Eirwen must be the Chosen One. 

And while Eirwen was hospitalized, Eirwen wouldn't have taken him to Neverland.

So yeah, I don't give a damn about Thomas. 

We are told that Tom is "a good sport" because he waited for the cheers to die down. 

“As always, you’re popular with the ladies, Eirwen. I’m jealous.”

"Even though these ladies should not live within two thousand feet of any daycare centers and schools." 

 Like himself, Thomas was dressed in an all-white fencing uniform with a chest protector made of plastic and a lamé - a layer of electrically conductive material worn over the fencing jacket in foil that was used for detecting hits.

People who are professional fencers actually wear a uniform???

A mesh metal mask was covering his face protectively,

so Eirwen was unable to see what was undoubtedly Thomas’s amused expression.

Let's break this down, shall we?

We know that Eirwen and Thomas are wearing the same uniform...

They also wear a mask.

And this same mask supposedly makes it unable to see someone's face.

So if you can't see someone's face, then you can't see someone's body.

Which means that Eirwen and Thomas are just swinging their swords blindly.

“Do shut up,” Eirwen groused irritably,

Ah, bad dialogue tags. 

How I loath thee. 

And isn't Eirwen such a good friend?

Tom parries Eirwen's blow and then does a counterattack. 

Eirwen gracefully parried. 

We get it, K. Kamen. 

Eirwen is the best swordsman ever. 

Stop reminding us every five seconds. 

This was the London Open - a fencing competition for national and international fencers. 

Remember this, gentlepersons. 

Because later on, I will explain its significance. 

Eirwen had made it to the final,

It could be just me...

But this sentence seems off. 

Perhaps it would be better if it read: Eirwen had made it to the final round. 

and this last match would determine the gold medal winner and champion of the competition. 

If a person wins a competition, they are crowned the winner and get a medal or a trophy. 

He wanted to make the club he belonged to - the Academy Cadets Club - proud. 

People who participate in a sport or belong in a club want to do their best. 

But at least...

We are told that Eirwen needs one more point to win. 

Eirwen’s muscles were beginning to ache and a pounding headache was beginning to form behind his eyes. His vision was blurring slightly. He blinked rapidly to clear his vision and looked up towards the stands.

These sentences just gave me a migraine.

A good action scene doesn't read like a laundry list. 

Instead it should have descriptions sprinkled throughout. 

What the…?

It is an apt description for this book. 

There perched at the very top of the stands was the oddest girl Eirwen had ever seen. 

And he had seen a chick cosplay as Cthulhu. 

Her wild, long, golden blonde hair with scattered braids was adorned with spring flowers and ivy vines. She was dressed in a green tube dress that was decorated with ivy, and a pair of green ankle boots made out of soft leather. 

Even more laundry list descriptions. 

And wouldn't someone dressed like that be noticed by a lot of people?

Her grass-green eyes were sparkling mischievously and an impish smile quirked her pink, pouty lips.

She looked very ‘fairy-like’ or ‘pixie-like’, 

but she had no wings and was the size of a normal human girl around his age. (Eirwen had just turned eighteen).

Last time I checked, humans don't have wings.

So no shit, Sherlock. 

And "size of a normal human girl"? 

Merriam Webster defined size as "physical magnitude, extent, or bulk : relative or proportionate dimensions."

While height is the "distance from the bottom to the top of someone or something standing upright". 

An example would be: "a woman of average height"

Which means that the right word would be height and not size. 

In conclusion:

Maybe it was just how the sunlight coming in from the windows framed her body with a golden aura that made her look so…otherworldly.

Fairy cosplay? 

Because it is totally normal for someone to have a golden aura. 

Eirwen wondered in bemusement, arching an eyebrow at her.

When Eirwen blinks his eyes, the girl disappears.

What the?

So a girl dressed in a fairy outfit with a golden aura isn't Abby Normal.

But her suddenly disappearing is considered unusual.

Gotta love Eirwen's logic.

Thanks to Eirwen’s well-honed battle reflexes he just barely managed to dodge a lunge from Tom 

I know that I'm supposed to be impressed with Eirwen aka Mr. I haz awesome swordfightin' skillz. 

But it is really obnoxious when Eirwen's alleged badassery is constantly shoved in my face every five seconds. 

- the fencing blade passing his face. 

I know that I'm supposed to clutching my pearls...

But I simply don't give a damn. 

Bloody hell.

My exact words every time a character thinks or does something stupid. 

Eirwen needed to concentrate on his match. 

After taking a deep breath, Eirwen charges forward. And because the plot demands it, he scores the winning point. 

Of course the cheers are "deafening" as everybody stands up and chants "Darling! Darling! Darling!"

Eirwen had to resist the urge to plug up his ears with his index fingers. 

Look at this fencing mask:

Does it look like someone can stick their fingers in their ears?

Eirwen removed his helmet while Tom did the same. 

Wait a tick. 

Originally, they were wearing a mask. 

And now it is a helmet? 

As Mark Twain wisely said: 

So Eirwen is smirking. 

He’d won the match.

His final match. 

Because it will handle the topic of contemplating suicide in a half-assed and almost flippant manner.

Eirwen ran his hand through his "sweaty, short, dark brown hair". 

Tom was grinning at Eirwen cheerily even though he’d lost. 

It means that Tom isn't a sore loser, you dumbass. 

“Brilliant match.”

Don't give Eirwen a verbal handjob. 

So Eirwen shakes Tom's hand and says “Hell yeah.”

Suddenly, Tom asks if Eirwen if he is really quitting fencing. 

Eirwen shrugged carelessly. 

There is no such thing as accidentally or "carelessly" shrugging your shoulders. 

It is a gesture that a person can make. 

Eirwen replies “I’m afraid so." 

So Tom glares at him and demands “Why?”

“Fencing…just doesn’t interest me anymore,” Eirwen lied.

I'll let this speak for itself:

“Bollocks!” Tom swore in a frustrated manner. 

Two things:

Show don't tell 

And...

Tom goes on to say that he knows that Eirwen will return to fencing someday and that he is waiting for "our next rematch." 

He then adds "But next time it will be at the Olympics.”

And I just threw up in my mouth. Want to know why?

Eirwen Darling is so handsome and famous that all the girls want to bang him.

He is also the Chosen One. 

And because of Eirwen's awesome swordfighting' skillz, he could compete at the Olympics...

*deep sigh*

Anywho, Eirwen "half-heartedly agreed" and then looks at his two younger sisters. Their names are Joan and Michelle. 

And like everyone else, they are "waving and screaming his name." Eirwen grins at them. 

His sisters were utterly adorable, and the apples of his eyes.

It could be just me...

But it comes across as incredibly creepy that a brother is describing his younger sisters as being "utterly adorable."

Especially in a book where girls are lusting after the main character because his great grandfather was the inspiration behind a famous children's book.

And said main character has a raging why boner for a genderbent version of Peter Pan who is now a teenage girl with huge bazongas...

So in conclusion:

Joan was eight-years-old, and had the same boring dark brown hair he did. 

...

I didn't know that having brown hair was "boring."

She’d pulled her hair back into a serious ponytail, 

"Serious ponytail"???

I didn't know that ponytails could emote. 

"Serious ponytail" is as asinine as the term female-presenting nipples. 

Joan also wears glasses. 

Michelle, on the other hand, didn’t look related to them. 

Because all siblings must look identical! 

She had blonde hair, which she wore in two pigtails, bright blue eyes, a round cherubic face, and a smattering of freckles along the bridge of her nose. 

'Ello Laundry List O' Doom. 

In real life, a child can look exactly like their mother, their father, or both parents.

And sometimes, they can strongly resemble a grandparent. 

I don't know why K. Kamen thinks it is unusual...

Because people would generally assume that one of the Darling parents was a brunet[te] while the other was a blond[e].  

Michelle was holding a stuffed pink unicorn.

Eirwen met their gazes and held up his sword in a triumphant pose. 

So in other words...

He is posing like this:

So Eirwen is heading towards his siblings with "purposeful steps". 

Out of the corner of Eirwen’s eye, he noticed that a man in a hoodie was approaching his sisters. He didn’t really think anything of it 

Considering the fact that the Darling children are orphans and Eirwen is taking care of them...

You'd think he'd be concerned that a stranger is approaching his sister. 

Especially since said stranger is concealing their face...

until the man suddenly grabbed Michelle, who let out a surprised squeak.

Swiper no swiping!

The man kept one arm wrapped around Michelle’s waist while he turned to face Eirwen and used his right hand to lower his hood to reveal-

It was Woody Allen. 

It was Jim Graveson - an ex-fencer. 

Um... What?

Prior to this scene, Jim was never mentioned or appeared in this chapter. 

But it's painfully obvious that this is supposed to be important because of the dramatic reveal.

So...

We then get an info dump about Jim. 

It turns out that Jim attended the same school as Eirwen. He also belonged to the Academy Cadets Club. 

But Eirwen was forced to quit the club after being expelled from school for getting into fights. 

We are also supposed to believe the following: 

If he hadn’t been expelled, Jim would have participated in the London Open and probably would have ended up in the finals against Eirwen since he was a better fencer than Tom.

That requires a lot of assuming. 

Not only Jim would have to be better than Tom... 

But he would have to be better than everyone else in the fencing club minus Eirwen. 

Also, Tom would have better than all the other contestants in the London Open in order to fight Eirwen. 

It was no secret that Jim had liked to consider himself Eirwen’s rival.

You'd think that a "rival" would be a prominent antagonist and not some random guy who came out of left field. 

Jim was tall and had a lanky physique. His skin was overly pale and he had short curly black hair. He was wearing a Black Sabbath T-shirt, a pair of faded jeans and some muddy sneakers. 

Eirwen’s fan girls probably would have considered Jim to be attractive if it wasn’t for the glazed, slightly psychotic look in his eyes.

Puh-lease!

If that was the case, then you wouldn't have women lusting after Ted Bundy, Edward Cullen, and Christian Grey. 

Eirwen gave the young man a confused look. 

A person who has a "psychotic look" has snatched his sister. 

But this makes Eirwen bewildered.

“Jim.”

“Eirwen,” Jim drawled with a dark edge.

Normally, I would remark on the unnecessary dialogue tag...

But I'm still dumbfounded by Eirwen's idiocy. 

“Why are you doing this, Jim?” Eirwen demanded, trying to keep the panic out of his voice. “Let Michelle go.”

Thank God Eirwen dropped the idiot ball. 

Even though he shouldn't have held it in the first place. 

And show don't tell. 

“Why don’t you make me, Champion,” Jim sneered, his lip curling in disdain.

When a person sneers, they are expressing contempt or disdain towards something.

So...

“W-What?” Eirwen stammered in surprise.

First of all, redundant dialogue tag. 

And secondly...

“You heard me,” Jim drawled, a glint in his gray eyes. “Make me. Fight me with that sword you’re still holding in your hand. I should have been the one to fight you today - not Tom. I would have beaten you and become champion. I’m the real champion of this competition!”

I'm sorry...

But I can't take a villain seriously who gives a long monologue. 

Eirwen shakes his head "in a helpless fashion." He then said “No way, mate.”

Jim reached behind him and pulled out a rapier - a real one with a long, thin, sharp steel blade.

Well...

It would be an awkward situation if Jim was brandishing a toy sword. 

Jim put the edge of the blade against Michelle’s throat. 

Where are the security guards?

Is anyone calling the police? 

How is everyone reacting to the situation? Especially Joan and Tom? 

Why is upcoming fight scene so fucking stupid?

And

“I said…fight me. Or else little Michelle gets it.”

"Take me seriously, even though I'm spewing cliched dialogue."

Eirwen’s amber eyes flashed with anger, and he raised his sword threateningly even though he knew a foil couldn’t really do much damage. 

First of all...

Show don't tell. 

And it begs the question why Eirwen isn't asking Tom to get security or to call the cops. 

So Eirwen asks Jim to let his sister go. 

And Jim is happier than a pig in shit because Eirwen is going to fight him. 

When Eirwen saw a thin cut form on his sister’s neck he flew into action, lunging his sword forward. 

Because when a hostage-taker has a blade pressed against the hostage's throat...

The best thing to do is to charge the hostage-taker head on and unarmed.

There is a reason why there are hostage negotiation courses and people trained in said courses. 

As for Eirwen? He has zero training. 

And what's stopping Jim from slitting Michelle's throat? 

He already gave Michelle a small cut...

Which means that Jim doesn't have any qualms about hurting someone. 

Jim moved his sword away from Michelle’s throat to parry the attack, and their blades clashed.

Because for plot reasons, Michelle can't be hurt or killed by Jim.

If that happened...

Petra Pan won't be thinking that Eirwen is the most heroic and selfless knight eva. 

Because he is the Chosen One... *sigh*

Anywho, Michelle bites Jim's forearm. 

Jim cried out in pain.

“Ah! Why, you insolent little brat!” 

...

"Insolent little brat"?

Anywho, Jim lets go of Michelle and she lands on her butt. Then Joan picks up her sister and runs away. 

"Get back here, you little brats! You'll pay for that!"

And I thought such fantastic dialogue could only be found in The Scorpion King 3. 

Jim heads towards the girls but Eirwen blocks him. But Eirwen doesn't just stop Jim, gentlepersons. 

He "smoothly stepped into his path" and "with his fencing sword raised." 

This is supposed to be an oh so subtle indication that Eirwen is awesome badass. 

 “I thought you wanted to fight me, Jim.”

Silly, Eirwen. 

Character consistency is for squares. 

A twisted smile spread across Jim’s face.

The two young men both got into fencing stances, and sized each other up for a moment.

After the measuring contest, Jim goads Eirwen. He then let out a shout and attacks Eirwen. 

Eirwen easily blocked the reckless attack with his fencing sword. Jim attacked swiftly again and again, but Eirwen continued to deftly block all of Jim’s attacks.

We get it.

Eirwen is allegedly a badass swordsman. Stop reminding us every five seconds. 

Jim was beginning to get pissed and frustrated. 

Letting out a roar, 

Because he is doing a lion impersonation. 

he swung his rapier in a fierce sideways slash. 

Forgive me for not quivering with fear.

So their swords clashed... And thank God, we don't hear about sparks flying.  

Anway, Eirwen's sword breaks. 

Eirwen leapt backwards instinctively, narrowly avoiding the tip of Jim’s sword from grazing against his chest.

I know that this book is hellbent on painting Eirwen as an epic badass...

But I'm not impressed. 

Anyone with more brain cells than Bella Swan would dodge an attack. 

No point had been earned yet though.

Because when a person is in a life or death situation... 

It is important for that individual to be crowned the champion. 

But then Eirwen realized with a sinking feeling in his chest that he should have just let Jim’s sword graze him and lose this impromptu match.

Besides being dead as a doornail...

Eirwen wouldn't be an epic badass who is destined to become The Chosen One. 

Bloody hell. Why am I even playing along with this lunatic? Who the hell cares who wins or loses at this point?

Because buddy boy, once rigor mortis sets in... 

Jim can track down your sisters and brutally murder them. 

Now Eirwen only had the pathetic stump of a fencing sword left to defend himself with while Jim had a real sword that was deadly sharp and dangerous

Well, trying to fight a psychopath instead of calling the police is fifty shades of stupid. 

So...

There was this sinister leer on Jim’s face 

*sigh* 

If Jim was anymore cartoonishly evil, he would be kicking a puppy. 

as he pointed the sword at Eirwen.

Eirwen didn’t fear death.

And I thought Rooster Teeth was the only one who had such an aversion towards show don't tell. 

In fact, he would welcome it, but…

If he did that, he can't pork a buxom Peter Pan. 

And sweet Jesus here comes even more stupidity... 

“Jim, stop this now. You’re already going to be in so much trouble for this.”

That's putting it mildly. 

I don't think the police consider kidnapping and attempted murder to bothersome. 

Eirwen gave the young man a beseeching look. 

It's bad enough that Eirwen is the Chosen One AND an alleged badass swordsman...

But he is now Sir Galahad. 

“Do you really want to throw your life away for this? For one silly match? It’s not worth it. I’m not worth it. As far as I’m concerned you’ve already won this match!”

...

...........

...........................................................

Unfortunately for Eirwen, Jim is not moved by the speech.

Jim replies that he hasn't won the match yet and “Not until I make you bleed!”

Shit. 

An apt description for this book. 

Eirwen realized he had no choice but to fight Jim seriously. 

And Eirwen's inner God stopped doing the safety dance. 

So, the two guys charge each other and Eirwen's cheek is sliced. 

And because Eirwen is wearing Mithril plot armor, he disarms Jim. But he doesn't just disarm someone. 

No, no, no! Only a filthy peasant would do something so mundane as that. 

Eirwen sends Jim's sword flying up in the air. But wait! There is much, much more! 

Eirwen spun and caught the sword by the hilt, and pointed the tip of the rapier to Jim’s throat. 

Anywho...

Eirwen tells Jim to yield but Jim refused. 

 Jim reached into his hoodie and pulled out a handgun. 

Remember when I promised to explain the significance of the London Open?

If so... *offers a platter of cupcakes *

Anywho... This whole situation is fifty shades of stupid. 

The London Open is for national and international fencers. 

Which means that there should be security guards.

And newfangled technology called metal detectors. 

Because with lax security, you are asking for trouble.

But silly me, things like logic and common sense doesn't exist in this book. 

People immediately screamed at the sight of it and began to run for the exits in the hall.

Nobody was alarmed when a kid was held hostage by a psychopath.

Or when said psychopath demanded a duel with Eirwen. 

They only freaked out when the psychopath brandished a gun.

Eirwen looks at the gun and sighs. 

“You have got to be kidding me. Bad form, mate.”

I know this is supposed to another subtle sign that Eirwen is honorable and a knight in shining armor...

But this makes Eirwen look like a moron. 

“Eirwen!” his sisters cried out simultaneously in their worry.

So Jim points the gun at Eirwen's sisters. 

Eirwen’s eyes flared in alarm. 

Having a burst of fire shooting out of your eyes must hurt like a son of a bitch. 

No! 

Anyway, Eirwen jumps in front of Jim. He then tries to take the gun. But Jim pulls the trigger. 

Eirwen looked down and noticed the bright red spot spreading on his shoulder, blooming like a red flower on his white fencing uniform. 

Wow...

Just like Cassandra Clare, K. Kamen writes weird similes. 

And like a honey badger, Eirwen doesn't give a shit. Instead, he thinks: Heh, I’ve been shot.

Eiwen wondered dazedly why it didn’t hurt. 

Maybe it is because Eirwen took some morphine.

Or...

It is because the author doesn't realize that if someone was shot, they would be in pain. 

Suddenly, Eirwen grins as he starts to lose consciousness. 

Hopefully this has killed me. That’d be great.

You know what?

This is the first time that I agree with Eirwen. 

Out of the corner of his eye, Eirwen caught sight of a flash of gold and green.

I'll give you three guesses and the first two don't count.

A green mist enveloped the handgun 

and it was wrenched out of Jim’s hand and sent flying, 

It could be just me but...

I think the word "wrenched" should be replaced with yanked. 

skidding across the gymnasium floor.

The gun flew out of Jim's hand.

Unless Jim was on the floor, the gun would have flown through the air and hit a wall. 

Jim loosed a cry of alarm and he too went flying, 

First of all, show don't tell. 

Also, the word "loosed" made my head hurt. 

It would be better if the sentence read: Jim screamed and he went flying. 

but Eirwen hadn’t touched him. 

Huh…? What’s going on?

Something supernatural, you twit. 

“Eirwen! Eirwen!” His sisters were shouting his name,  but they sounded so far away.

Um... 

Why are his sisters the only ones concerned about Eirwen?

Wouldn't Tom be upset?

And where is he? 

This was the last thing Eirwen remembered before he lost consciousness.

And unfortunately for the reader, the story continues. 

#kurokoneko kamen #bad fiction #snark #chapter snark #petra pan #book snark

[collectorscorner]

CC Blogger - New Arrivals @ Collectors Corner : Wednesday - 6/12/19

Complete list of items shipping to the stores, some items may be limited in availability. If you see anything you want to purchase on the list and are not a subscription member at Collectors Corner, just contact us and let us know if you want an item held at the stores. email - [email protected]

Subscription Membership & Free Membership Card : Collectors Corner’s No Obligation (FREE) Membership Card or FREE (In Store) & ONLINE Subscription Membership saves you 10% Off ALL Bagged & Boarded Comic Book Back Issues, Board Games, Graphic Novels, Manga & Special Orders. Plus Never miss a comic again!

Computerized and organized + you can add and cancel titles on your subscription list from home on your own time, or in the store when you pick up your comics at :

Maryland’s Coolest Stores! Since 2001.

3 Convenient Locations -

CC PARKVILLE HQ 7911 Harford Rd Parkville, MD 21234

CC BALTIMORE - OUTPOST 403 North Charles St. Baltimore, MD 21201

CC BEL AIR - OUTPOST 17 N. Main St. Bel Air, MD 21014

www.collectorscornermd.com

NEW ARRIVALS : WEDNESDAY - 6/12/19

ABSTRACT STUDIOS Five Years #2, $3.99

ACTION LAB ENTERTAINMENT Princeless Volume 8 Princesses #4, $3.99 Seafoam A Friend For Madison #2, $3.99 Sweetie #4, $3.99 This Love So Brief #1 (One Shot), $3.99

AFTERSHOCK COMICS Lollipop Kids Volume 1 TP, $14.99 Orphan Age #3, $3.99 Trust Fall #1 (Cover A Chris Visions), $3.99 Trust Fall #1 (Cover B Claire Roe), $3.99

AHOY COMICS Bronze Age Boogie #3, $3.99

ALBATROSS FUNNYBOOKS Grumble #7, $3.99 Mega Ghost #5 (Of 5), $3.99

AMERICAN MYTHOLOGY PRODUCTIONS Carson Of Venus Warlord Of Mars #1 (Cover A Michael William Kaluta), $3.99 Carson Of Venus Warlord Of Mars #1 (Cover B Cyrus Mesarcia Warriors Variant), $3.99 Carson Of Venus Warlord Of Mars #1 (Cover C Cyrus Mesarcia Character Design Variant), $9.99 Casper's Spooksville #1 (Of 4)(Cover A Eric Shanowar), $3.99 Casper's Spooksville #1 (Of 4)(Cover B Jeff Scherer Spook The Moon Variant), $3.99 Casper's Spooksville #1 (Of 4)(Cover C Cyrus Mesarcia), $9.99

AMIGO COMICS Blackening #5 (Of 6), $3.99 Call Of The Suicide Forest GN, $19.99 Gargantuan #0 (Of 5), $2.99 Gargantuan #1 (Of 5), $3.99 Titan Mother Of Monsters TP, $19.99

ARCHIE COMIC PUBLICATIONS Archie #705 (Cover A Veronica Fish), $3.99 Archie #705 (Cover B Tyler Boss), $3.99 Archie #705 (Cover C Elsa Charretier), $3.99 Archie And Friends Beach Party #1, $2.99 Betty And Veronica Friends Forever TP, $12.99 Jughead's Time Police #1 (Cover A Derek Charm), $3.99 Jughead's Time Police #1 (Cover B Tyler Boss), $3.99 Jughead's Time Police #1 (Cover C Francesco Francavilla), $3.99 Jughead's Time Police #1 (Cover D Robert Hack), $3.99 Jughead's Time Police #1 (Cover E Tracy Yardley), $3.99

BOOM! STUDIOS Big Trouble In Little China Legacy Edition Volume 1 TP, $29.99 By Night #12 (Of 12)(Cover A Christine Larsen), $3.99 By Night #12 (Of 12)(Cover B Sarah Stern), $3.99 Empty Man #8 (Cover A Vanesa R. Del Rey), $3.99 Empty Man #8 (Cover B Jesus Hervas), $3.99 Garfield Snack Pack Volume 2 TP, $14.99 Jim Henson's The Dark Crystal The Novelization SC, $14.99 Jim Henson's The Storyteller Sirens #3 (Cover A Cory Godbey), $3.99 Jim Henson's The Storyteller Sirens #3 (Cover B Sarah Webb), $3.99

DAIKAIJU G-Fan #124, $6.95 DANGER ZONE Aberrant Season 2 #3 (Of 5)(Cover A Davi Leon Dias), $3.99 Aberrant Season 2 #3 (Of 5)(Cover B Davi Leon Dias), $3.99 Banjax #1 (Cover A Fabio Alves), $3.99 Banjax #1 (Cover B Fabio Alves), $3.99 Null Faeries #6 (Cover A Chad Cicconi), $3.99 Null Faeries #6 (Cover B Sorah Suhng), $3.99 Spencer And Locke 2 #3 (Cover A Jorge Santiago Jr.), $3.99 Spencer And Locke 2 #3 (Cover B Maan House), $3.99 Spencer And Locke 2 #3 (Cover C Joe Mulvey), $3.99 Voracious Appetite For Destruction #2 (Cover A Jason Muhr), $3.99 Voracious Appetite For Destruction #2 (Cover B Louie Joyce), $3.99

DARK HORSE COMICS Art Of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles HC, $39.99 Calamity Kate #4 (Cover A Corin Howell Pinto & Valentina Pinto), $3.99 Calamity Kate #4 (Cover B Becky Cloonan), $3.99 Disney PIXAR The Incredibles 2 Secret Identities #3 (Of 3)(Cover A Jean Claudio-Vinci), $3.99 Disney PIXAR The Incredibles 2 Secret Identities #3 (Of 3)(Cover B Kawaii Creative Studio), $3.99 Dr. Horrible And Other Horrible Stories TP (2nd Edition), $19.99 EC Archives Weird Fantasy Volume 4 HC, $49.99 Final Fantasy Ultimania Archive Volume 3 HC, $39.99 Halo Lone Wolf HC, $19.99 Joe Golem Occult Detective The Conjurors #2 (Of 5), $3.99 Moonshadow The Definitive Edition HC, $29.99 Plants Vs Zombies Volume 13 Snow Thanks HC, $9.99 Predator Hunters II TP, $17.99 She Could Fly The Lost Pilot #3 (Of 5), $3.99 Umbrella Academy Hotel Oblivion #7 (Cover A Gabriel Ba), $3.99 Umbrella Academy Hotel Oblivion #7 (Cover B Gabriel Ba), $3.99

DC COMICS Batman And The Outsiders #2 (Cover A Tyler Kirkham), $3.99 Batman And The Outsiders #2 (Cover B Otto Schmidt), AR Batman The Golden Age Omnibus Volume 7 HC, $125.00 Batman Who Laughs #6 (Of 7)(Cover A Jock), $4.99 Batman Who Laughs #6 (Of 7)(Cover B Jenny Frison), AR Catwoman #12 (Cover A Joelle Jones), $3.99 Catwoman #12 (Cover B Stanley Artgerm Lau), AR DC Poster Portfolio Stanley Artgerm Lau TP, $24.99 Detective Comics #1000 Deluxe Edition HC, $19.99 Detective Comics #1005 (Cover A Brad Walker & Andrew Hennessy), $3.99 Detective Comics #1005 (Cover B Stjepan Sejic), $3.99 Event Leviathan #1 (Of 6)(Cover A Alex Maleev), $3.99 Event Leviathan #1 (Of 6)(Cover B Kenneth Rocafort), AR Flash #72 (Cover A Howard Porter), $3.99 Flash #72 (Cover B Derrick Chew), AR Hawkman #13 (Cover A Will Conrad), $3.99 Hawkman #13 (Cover B InHyuk Lee), AR Hawkman Volume 1 Awakening TP, $16.99 House Of Whispers #10, $3.99 Justice League Odyssey #10 (Cover A Daniel Sampere), $3.99 Justice League Odyssey #10 (Cover B Lucio Parillo), AR Red Hood Outlaw #35 (Cover A Cully Hamner), $3.99 Red Hood Outlaw #35 (Cover B Yasmine Putri), AR Supergirl #31 (Cover A Yanick Paquette), $3.99 Supergirl #31 (Cover B Amanda Conner), AR Superman #12 (Cover A Ivan Reis & Joe Prado), $3.99 Superman #12 (Cover B Adam Hughes), AR Superman Action Comics The Oz Effect TP, $19.99 Terrifics Volume 2 Tom Strong And The Terrifics TP, $16.99 United States Of Vs Murder Inc Volume 1 TP (New Edition), $16.99 Wonder Twins #5 (Cover A Stephen Byrne), $3.99 Wonder Twins #5 (Cover B Stacey Lee), AR Wonder Woman #72 (Cover A Terry Dodson & Rachel Dodson), $3.99 Wonder Woman #72 (Cover B Jenny Frison), AR

DYNAMITE ENTERTAINMENT Boys Omnibus Volume 2 TP (Cover A Darick Robertson), $29.99 Boys Omnibus Volume 2 TP (Cover B Photo), $29.99 Elvira Mistress Of The Dark #6 (Cover A Joseph Michael Linsner), $3.99 Elvira Mistress Of The Dark #6 (Cover B Craig Cermak), $3.99 Elvira Mistress Of The Dark #6 (Cover C John Royle), $3.99 Elvira Mistress Of The Dark #6 (Cover D Photo), $3.99 Elvira Mistress Of The Dark #6 (Cover E Craig Cermak Virgin Variant), AR Elvira Mistress Of The Dark #6 (Cover F John Royle Virgin Variant), AR Elvira Mistress Of The Dark #6 (Cover G Joseph Michael Linsner Black & White Variant), AR James Bond Origin #10 (Cover A Dan Panosian), $3.99 James Bond Origin #10 (Cover B W. Scott Forbes), $3.99 James Bond Origin #10 (Cover C Cian Tormey), $3.99 James Bond Origin #10 (Cover D Ibrahim Moustafa), $3.99 James Bond Origin #10 (Cover E Bob Q), $3.99 James Bond Origin #10 (Cover F Dan Panosian Virgin Variant), AR Red Sonja #4 (Cover K Amanda Conner Virgin Variant), AR Red Sonja #4 (Cover L Joseph Michael Linsner Virgin Variant), AR Red Sonja Birth Of The She-Devil #1 (Of 4)(Cover A Lucio Parrillo), $3.99 Red Sonja Birth Of The She-Devil #1 (Of 4)(Cover B Sergio Davila), $3.99 Red Sonja Birth Of The She-Devil #1 (Of 4)(Cover C Cosplay), $3.99 Red Sonja Birth Of The She-Devil #1 (Of 4)(Cover D Sergio Davila Virgin Variant), AR Red Sonja Birth Of The She-Devil #1 (Of 4)(Cover E Sergio Davila Black & White Variant), AR Red Sonja Birth Of The She-Devil #1 (Of 4)(Cover F Cosplay Virgin Variant), AR Red Sonja Birth Of The She-Devil #1 (Of 4)(Cover G Lucio Parrillo Virgin Variant), AR Red Sonja Worlds Away Volume 4 Blade Of Skath TP, $19.99 Xena Warrior Princess #3 (Cover A David Mack), $3.99 Xena Warrior Princess #3 (Cover B Emanuela Lupacchino), $3.99 Xena Warrior Princess #3 (Cover C Paulina Ganucheau), $3.99 Xena Warrior Princess #3 (Cover D David Mack Virgin Variant), AR Xena Warrior Princess #3 (Cover E Emanuela Lupacchino Black & White Variant), AR Xena Warrior Princess #3 (Cover F Paulina Ganucheau Virgin Variant), AR

FANTAGRAPHICS BOOKS Angola Janga Kingdom Of Runaway Slaves HC, $39.99 FIRST SECOND Singing Rock And Other Brand-New Fairy Tales HC, $17.99

HERO TOMORROW COMICS Apama The Undiscovered Animal #10 (Cover A Benito Gallego), $3.99 Apama The Undiscovered Animal #10 (Cover B Donny Hadiwidjaja Nikki St Clair Variant), $3.99

IDW PUBLISHING Amber Blake #1 (Of 5)(Butch Guice 2nd Printing Variant Cover), $3.99 Amber Blake #4 (Of 5)(Cover A Butch Guice), $3.99 Amber Blake #4 (Of 5)(Cover B Catherine Nodet), AR Berkeley Breathed's Bloom County Artist's Edition HC, $150.00 Disney Comics And Stories #5 (Cover A Paolo Campinoti), $5.99 G.I. Joe A Real American Hero #263 (Cover A S. L. Gallant), $3.99 G.I. Joe A Real American Hero #263 (Cover B Dan Fraga), $3.99 G.I. Joe A Real American Hero #263 (Cover C S. L. Gallant), AR GLOW #2 (Cover A Hannah Templer), $3.99 GLOW #2 (Cover B Nicoletta Baldari), AR GLOW #2 (Cover C Jenn St-Onge), AR Goosebumps Horrors Of The Witch House #2 (Cover A Chris Fenoglio), $3.99 Goosebumps Horrors Of The Witch House #2 (Cover B Megan Levens), AR Grave TP, $17.99 League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen Volume 4 The Tempest #6 (Cover A Kevin O'Neill), $4.99 League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen Volume 4 The Tempest #6 (Cover B Kevin O'Neill), AR Marvel Action Spider-Man #5 (Cover A Christopher Jones), $3.99 Marvel Action Spider-Man #5 (Cover B Juan Samu), AR My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic #78 (Cover A Andy Price), $3.99 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic #78 (Cover B Sara Richard), $3.99 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic #78 (Cover C Brenda Hickey), AR My Little Pony To Where And Back Again GN, $7.99 Penny Nichols GN, $19.99 Road Of The Dead Highway To Hell TP, $15.99 Star Trek The Q Conflict #5 (Of 6)(Cover A David Messina), $3.99 Star Trek The Q Conflict #5 (Of 6)(Cover B David Messina), $3.99 Star Trek The Q Conflict #5 (Of 6)(Cover C George Caltsoudas), AR Star Trek Vs Transformers TP, $17.99 Swamp Monsters TP, $24.99 Transformers #1 (Gabriel Rodriguez 2nd Printing Variant Cover), $3.99 Transformers #7 (Cover A Christian Ward), $3.99 Transformers #7 (Cover B Livio Ramondelli), $3.99 Transformers #7 (Cover C Guido Guidi), AR V-Wars God Of Death #1 (Cover A Ryan Brown), $4.99 V-Wars God Of Death #1 (Cover B Alex Milne), $4.99 V-Wars God Of Death #1 (Cover C Juan Carlos Ruiz Burgos), AR V-Wars God Of Death #1 (Jonathan Maberry Signed Edition), AR

IMAGE COMICS Excellence #1 (Khary Randolph & Emilio Lopez 2nd Printing Variant Cover), $3.99 Gogor #2, $3.99 Gunning For Hits #6, $3.99 Ice Cream Man Volume 3 Hopscotch Melange TP, $16.99 Infinite Dark #7, $3.99 Oblivion Song By Kirkman And De Felici #16, $3.99 Outer Darkness #7, $3.99 Prodigy #6 (Of 6)(Cover A Rafael Albuquerque), $3.99 Prodigy #6 (Of 6)(Cover B Rafael Albuquerque), $3.99 Prodigy #6 (Of 6)(Cover C Christian Ward), $3.99 Ride Burning Desire #1 (Of 5)(Cover A Adam Hughes), $3.99 Ride Burning Desire #1 (Of 5)(Cover B Daniel Hillyard), $3.99 Sonata #1 (Cover A Brian Haberlin & Geirrod Van Dyke), $3.99 Sonata #1 (Cover B Brian Haberlin & Geirrod Van Dyke), $3.99 Unnatural #10 (Of 12)(Cover A Mirka Andolfo), $3.99 Unnatural #10 (Of 12)(Cover B Otto Schmidt), $3.99

INSIGHT COMICS Djinn Volume 2 GN, $18.99 JY W.I.T.C.H. Part 5 The Book Of Elements Volume 3 GN, $15.00 W.I.T.C.H. Part 5 The Book Of Elements Volume 4 GN, $15.00

KEENSPOT ENTERTAINMENT Donald Who Laughs #1 (Cover E Shawn Remulac Lenticular Variant), $19.99 Hunters Of Salamanstra #16, $4.99 Junior High Horrors Volume 1 TP, $19.99

LEGENDARY COMICS Firebrand The Initiation Of Natali Presano GN, $14.99

LION FORGE Catalyst Prime Accell #21, $3.99

LITTLE BROWN BOOKS FOR YOUNG READERS Hangry GN, $17.99

MARVEL COMICS Age Of Conan Belit #4 (Of 5)(Cover A Sana Takeda), $3.99 Age Of Conan Belit #4 (Of 5)(Cover B Ben Caldwell), AR Age Of X-Man Apocalypse And The X-Tracts #4 (Of 5), $3.99 Age Of X-Man The Marvelous X-Men #5 (Of 5), $3.99 Amazing Spider-Man #23 (Cover A Ryan Ottley), $3.99 Amazing Spider-Man #23 (Cover B Daniel Acuna Marvels 25th Tribute Variant), AR Amazing Spider-Man #23 (Cover C Stuart Immonen Spider-Man Blue And Red Suit Variant), AR Asgardians Of The Galaxy #10, $3.99 Avengers No Road Home TP, $29.99 Champions #6 (Cover A Aaron Kim Jacinto), $3.99 Champions #6 (Cover B In-Hyuk Lee Marvels 25th Tribute Variant), AR Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #6 (Juann Cabal 2nd Printing Ratio Variant Cover), $3.99 Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #6 (TBD 2nd Printing Variant Cover), $3.99 Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #7, $3.99 Giant-Man #3 (Of 3), $3.99 Hulk By Loeb And McGuinness Omnibus HC, $100.00 Hulkverines TP, $15.99 Immortal Hulk #19 (Cover A Alex Ross), $3.99 Immortal Hulk #19 (Cover B Greg Smallwood Marvels 25th Tribute Variant), AR Immortal Hulk #19 (Cover C Ema Lupacchino Spider-Man Armor Suit Variant), AR Invaders #6, $3.99 Ironheart #7, $3.99 Major X #5 (Of 6), $3.99 Marvel Masterworks The Spectacular Spider-Man Volume 2 HC (Book Market Edition), $75.00 Marvel Masterworks The Spectacular Spider-Man Volume 2 HC (Direct Market Variant Edition Volume 276), $75.00 Marvel Monograph The Art Of Humberto Ramos Spider-Man TP, $19.99 Marvel Tales Spider-Man #1 (Cover A Jen Bartel), $7.99 Marvel Tales Spider-Man #1 (Cover B Jen Bartel Virgin Variant), AR New Mutants Abnett And Lanning The Complete Collection Volume 2 TP, $34.99 Punisher #12, $3.99 Silver Surfer Black #1 (Of 5)(Cover A Tradd Moore), $3.99 Silver Surfer Black #1 (Of 5)(Cover B Gerald Parel), AR Silver Surfer Black #1 (Of 5)(Cover C Nick Bradshaw), AR Silver Surfer Black #1 (Of 5)(Cover D Nick Bradshaw Virgin Variant), AR Silver Surfer Black #1 (Of 5)(Cover E Mike Zeck Hidden Gem Variant), AR Silver Surfer Black #1 (Of 5)(Cover F Blank Variant), AR Silver Surfer Black #1 (Of 5)(Cover G Ron Lim), AR Spider-Man Life Story #4 (Of 6)(Cover A Chip Zdarsky), $4.99 Spider-Man Life Story #4 (Of 6)(Cover B Kaare Andrews), AR Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane Real Thing TP, $12.99 Star Wars Age Of Rebellion Boba Fett #1 (Terry Dodson & Rachel Dodson 2nd Printing Variant Cover), $3.99 Star Wars Age Of Rebellion Han Solo #1 (Terry Dodson & Rachel Dodson 2nd Printing Variant Cover), $3.99 Star Wars Legends Epic Collection The Rebellion Volume 3 TP, $39.99 Star Wars Vader Dark Visions #5 (Of 5)(Cover A Greg Smallwood), $3.99 Star Wars Vader Dark Visions #5 (Of 5)(Cover B Aco), AR Superior Spider-Man #7, $3.99 Symbiote Spider-Man #2 (Of 5)(Greg Land 2nd Printing Variant Cover), $3.99 Symbiote Spider-Man #3 (Of 5)(Cover A Greg Land), $3.99 Symbiote Spider-Man #3 (Of 5)(Cover B Ron Lim), AR Symbiote Spider-Man #3 (Of 5)(Cover C Alex Saviuk), AR True Believers Spider-Man Morbius #1, $1.00 True Believers Spider-Man Vs Hulk #1, $1.00 True Believers The Sinister Secret Of Spider-Man's New Costume #1, $1.00 Unbeatable Squirrel Girl #45, $3.99 Venom #15 (Cover A Kyle Hotz), $3.99 Venom #15 (Cover B Simone Bianchi Marvels 25th Tribute Variant), AR War Of The Realms #3 (Of 6)(Juan Ferreyra 2nd Printing Variant Cover), $4.99 War Of The Realms Journey Into Mystery #2 (Of 5)(Valerio Schiti & David Curiel 2nd Printing Variant Cover), $3.99 War Of The Realms New Agents Of Atlas #1 (Of 4)(Jee-Hyung Lee 2nd Printing Variant Cover), $3.99 War Of The Realms New Agents Of Atlas #1 (Of 4)(Jee-Hyung Lee 2nd Printing Virgin Ratio Variant Cover), $3.99 X-Force #9, $3.99

ONI PRESS Kim Reaper Volume 2 Vampire Island TP, $14.99 Morning In America #4, $3.99 Rick And Morty Presents Mr. Meeseeks #1 (Cover A Sarah Stern), $4.99 Rick And Morty Presents Mr. Meeseeks #1 (Cover B Sarah Stern), $4.99

PAPERCUTZ Only Living Girl Volume 1 The Island At The Edge Of Infinity GN, $8.99 Only Living Girl Volume 1 The Island At The Edge Of Infinity HC, $13.99

REBELLION/2000AD Chopper Wandering Spirit TP, $12.99

RED 5 COMICS Afterburn Crossfire #2 (Of 4), $3.95

RENEGADE ARTS ENTERTAINMENT Burning Black The Legend Of Black Shuck GN, $14.99

SCOUT COMICS Mall #4 (Cover A Rafael Loureiro), $3.99 Mall #4 (Cover B Rafael Loureiro), AR Wulfborne TP, $9.99

SEVEN SEAS ENTERTAINMENT Certain Scientific Accelerator Volume 9 GN, $12.99 My Little Pony The Manga A Day In The Life Of Equestria Volume 1 GN, $10.99 Nurse Hitomi's Monster Infirmary Volume 9 GN, $12.99 Restaurant To Another World Light Novel Volume 1 SC, $13.99

SOURCE POINT PRESS Achilles Inc. #3, $3.99

TITAN COMICS Dark Souls The Age Of Fire TP, $16.99 Robotech #21 (Cover A Jeff Spokes), $3.99 Robotech #21 (Cover B Vehicle Action Figure Variant), $3.99 Robotech #21 (Cover C Nick Brokenshire), $3.99 Robotech #21 (Cover D Sarah Stone), $3.99 Robotech #21 (Cover E Blank Sketch Variant), $3.99 Secret Life Of Pets #2 (Cover A Goum), $3.99 Secret Life Of Pets #2 (Cover B Goum), $3.99 Snowpiercer Volume 1 The Escape HC, $19.99 Snowpiercer Volume 2 The Explorers HC, $24.99 Star Wars Insider #190 (Newsstand Edition), $7.99 Star Wars Insider #190 (Previews Exclusive Edition), $7.99 Toy Story 4 The Official Movie Special Magazine, $9.99

TOKYOPOP Yuri Bear Storm Volume 3 Yurikuma GN, $12.99

UDON ENTERTAINMENT Art Of Darksiders HC, $49.99 Art Of Darksiders II HC, $49.99

VALIANT ENTERTAINMENT Life And Death Of Toyo Harada #4 (Of 6)(Cover A Mico Suayan), $4.99 Life And Death Of Toyo Harada #4 (Of 6)(Cover B Ken Lashley), $4.99 Life And Death Of Toyo Harada #4 (Of 6)(Cover C Nen Chang), $4.99 Life And Death Of Toyo Harada #4 (Of 6)(Cover D CAFU Pre-Order Edition Variant), AR

VIZ MEDIA Evangelion Illustrations 2007-2017 SC, $34.99 Komi Can't Communicate Volume 1 GN, $9.99 Magi Volume 36 GN, $9.99 One Piece 3-In-1 Edition Volume 28 TP, $14.99 Pokemon The Movie Power Us Zeraora's Story GN, $9.99 Splatoon Volume 6 GN, $9.99

ZENESCOPE ENTERTAINMENT Hellchild Blood Money #3 (Of 4)(Cover A Martin Coccolo), $3.99 Hellchild Blood Money #3 (Of 4)(Cover B Allan Otero), $3.99 Hellchild Blood Money #3 (Of 4)(Cover C Derlis Santacruz), $3.99 Hellchild Blood Money #3 (Of 4)(Cover D Sheldon Goh), $3.99 Robyn Hood Outlaw #5 (Of 6)(Cover A Geebo Vigonte), $3.99 Robyn Hood Outlaw #5 (Of 6)(Cover B Sheldon Goh), $3.99 Robyn Hood Outlaw #5 (Of 6)(Cover C Claudia Iancello), $3.99 Robyn Hood Outlaw #5 (Of 6)(Cover D Canaan White), $3.99

TOYS - T-SHIRTS & COLLECTIBLES Avengers 4 Movie 6 Inch Deluxe Action Figure Assortment 201901, AR Avengers 4 Movie Iron Man Repulsor Roleplay, AR Avengers 4 Titan Heroes 12 Inch Action Figure Assortment 201902, AR Avengers Infinity War War Machine Mk4 S.H.Figuarts Action Figure, AR Barbie Toy Story 4 Doll, AR Batman Black And White Mini PVC Figure Blind Bag Wave 2, AR Black Magick Rowan's Sigil Pin, AR Darling In The Franxx Ichigo S.H. Figuarts Action Figure, AR DC Lobo Face T-Shirt LG, AR DC Lobo Face T-Shirt MED, AR DC Lobo Face T-Shirt SM, AR DC Lobo Face T-Shirt XL, AR DC Lobo Face T-Shirt XXL, AR Dragon Ball Super Cast T-Shirt LG, AR Dragon Ball Super Cast T-Shirt MED, AR Dragon Ball Super Cast T-Shirt SM, AR Dragon Ball Super Cast T-Shirt XL, AR Dragon Ball Super Cast T-Shirt XXL, AR Game Of Thrones Metal Earth Drogon Model Kit, AR Game Of Thrones Metal Earth House Stark Model Kit, AR Game Of Thrones Metal Earth Iron Throne Model Kit, AR Game Of Thrones Metal Earth Red Keep Model Kit, AR Game Of Thrones Metal Earth Silence Ship Model Kit, AR Game Of Thrones Metal Earth The Mountain Model Kit, AR Godzilla King Of Monsters Godzilla 2019 S.H. Monsterarts Action Figure (not verified by Diamond), AR Harry Potter Enamel Pin Badges 24 Piece Blind Mystery Box, AR Harry Potter Series 2 Figure Hangers 24 Piece Blind Mystery Box, AR Harry Potter Wand Figure Hangers 24 Piece Blind Mystery Box, AR JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Chozo Kado Giorno Giovanna Action Figure, AR Locke And Key Head Key Limited Edition Enamel Pin, AR Marvel MCU 10th Anniversary Iron Man 3 Action Figure Set, AR Mazinger Z Infinity Great Mazinger Metal Build Model Kit, AR Middlewest Scar T-Shirt LG, AR Middlewest Scar T-Shirt MED, AR Middlewest Scar T-Shirt SM, AR Middlewest Scar T-Shirt XL, AR Middlewest Scar T-Shirt XXL, AR Mobile Suit Gundam 0080 MS-18E Kampfer Robot Spirits Action Figure (Anime Version), AR Nintendo 2-1/2 Inch Figure Wave 19 Assortment, AR Our Name Is Mud Pusheen Mug With Spoon Set, AR POP Animation Castlevania Sypha Belnades Vinyl Figure, AR POP Animation Castlevania Vlad Dracula Tepes Vinyl Figure, AR POP DC Heroes Harley Quinn With Boombox Previews Exclusive Vinyl Figure, AR POP Disney Aladdin Jasmine Vinyl Figure, AR POP Disney Aladdin Live Aladdin Prince Ali Vinyl Figure, AR POP Disney Aladdin Live Genie Vinyl Figure, AR POP Disney Aladdin Live Jafar The Royal Vizier Vinyl Figure, AR POP Disney Lion King Live Pumbaa Vinyl Figure, AR POP Disney Lion King Live Rafiki Vinyl Figure, AR POP Disney Lion King Live Scar Vinyl Figure, AR POP Disney Lion King Live Simba Vinyl Figure, AR POP Disney Lion King Live Timon Vinyl Figure, AR POP Marvel Spider-Man Far From Home Happy Hogan Vinyl Figure, AR POP Marvel Spider-Man Far From Home Hero Suit Vinyl Figure, AR POP Marvel Spider-Man Far From Home Hydro-Man Vinyl Figure, AR POP Marvel Spider-Man Far From Home Stealth Suit Vinyl Figure, AR POP MLB Mascots Bernie Brewer Milwaukee Vinyl Figure, AR POP MLB Mascots Billy The Marlin Miami Vinyl Figure, AR POP MLB Mascots Paws Detroit Vinyl Figure, AR POP MLB Mascots Pirate Parrot Pittsburgh Vinyl Figure, AR POP MLB Mascots Stomper Oakland Vinyl Figure, AR POP MLB Mascots TC Bear Minnesota Vinyl Figure, AR POP Movie Moment Ghostbusters Banquet Room Vinyl Figure, AR POP Movies Ghostbusters Dr Egon Spengler Vinyl Figure, AR POP Movies Ghostbusters Dr Peter Venkman Vinyl Figure, AR POP Movies Ghostbusters Dr Raymond Stantz Vinyl Figure, AR POP Movies Ghostbusters Winston Zeddemore Vinyl Figure, AR POP Movies Pretty Woman Vivian Red Dress Vinyl Figure, AR POP Movies Pretty Woman Vivian With Chase Vinyl Figure, AR POP PEZ Ghostbusters Dr Egon Spengler, AR POP PEZ Ghostbusters Dr Peter Venkman, AR POP PEZ Ghostbusters Dr Raymond Stantz, AR POP PEZ Ghostbusters Slimer With Chase, AR POP PEZ Ghostbusters Stay Puft With Chase, AR POP PEZ Ghostbusters Winston Zeddemore, AR POP PEZ Hanna Barbera Atom Ant, AR POP PEZ Hanna Barbera Dick Dastardly, AR POP PEZ Hanna Barbera Ricochet Rabbit, AR POP PEZ Hanna Barbera Wally Gator, AR POP Pusheen Dragonsheen Vinyl Figure, AR POP Pusheen Pusheenosaurus Vinyl Figure, AR POP Pusheen Super Pusheenicorn Vinyl Figure, AR POP Rocks Johnny Cash In Black Vinyl Figure, AR POP Rocks Johnny Cash Vinyl Figure, AR POP SpongeBob Squarepants Patrick With Board Vinyl Figure, AR POP SpongeBob Squarepants SpongeBob Rainbow Vinyl Figure, AR POP SpongeBob Squarepants Squidward Ballerina Vinyl Figure, AR POP Town Ghostbusters Peter With House Vinyl Figure, AR Spider-Man Into The Spider-Verse Domez 24 Piece Blind Mystery Box, AR Star Wars Death Star Circo Cheese Board And Tools Set, AR Star Wars Empire Icon Glass Top Tray And Knife Set, AR Tamashii Option Brick Wall Kit (Grey Version), AR The Loyal Subjects X Game Of Thrones Drogon Mini Figure Wave 1, AR The Loyal Subjects X Game Of Thrones Rhaegal Mini Figure Wave 1, AR The Loyal Subjects X Game Of Thrones Viserion Mini Figure Wave 1, AR Transformers Generations WVC Battlemaster Action Figure Assortment 201903, AR X-Men Legends 6 Inch Action Figure Assortment 201901, AR Yamato 2202 Type 0 Model 52 Black Bird Set Mecha Collection, AR

[zrtranscripts]

Season 6, Mission 7: Lessons in Love

Revenge of the Nerds

MAXINE MYERS: Wait, wait. So and Nadia's gone to work with Amelia because Amelia's taken over New Canton?

SAM YAO: Not so much taken over as, um... well, yeah. Taken over. But it's not like she's running things for them. She's got them mostly running things for her. She's just very... you know. Decisive.

PAULA COHEN: People do like a decisive leader. And I suppose they can't do much worse than they were before. Any word on the location of the babies?

SAM YAO: Mm, no. We're working on it. Even the Laundry can't find anything for us. You see, ideally, we need someone inside Sigrid's inner circle, but well, that's going to be hard to arrange. In the meantime, getting parts for this transmitter of Jody's is a good start.

MAXINE MYERS: So that's what we're heading to this comms station for. We've caught snatches of their transmissions. We know they are bound to have the cables that Jody needs. I, for one, am glad to be serving Abel.

PAULA COHEN: It didn't need to be us, though, did it? Tom was going to go, and you insisted we went instead. Five, has Maxine told you the real reason she wanted to go on this mission?

MAXINE MYERS: For Abel?

PAULA COHEN: It's because she hasn't been able to find any copies of Xena: Warrior Princess since the apocalypse, and that just happens to be what this place is broadcasting.

MAXINE MYERS: That's just a coincidence! Back me up, Sam.

SAM YAO: Oh whoa-ho-ho, no. No, no, no. You two can leave me out of this. Remember our co-parenting contract?

MAXINE MYERS: I don't think that really applies...

SAM YAO: Oh yes, it does. I can read you the exact clause. When we agreed to be co-parents, I got it from both of you, in writing, that I would never, ever be asked to adjudicate in a row.

PAULA COHEN: Fine. Five, listen to this: Max volunteered us for a mission, on date night - a date night where I was planning to make latkes - because she has a crush on Xena flipping Warrior whatever.

MAXINE MYERS: You've never seen Xena: Warrior Princess! [laugh] Right, we need to make that right immediately.

SAM YAO: Yeah. Guys, before you get Xena: Warrior Princess, you're going to have to make it through that playground full of child zombies. I think they must have been trapped in the school until the storm the other day.

MAXINE MYERS: Oh God! The kids are the worst! Run!

SAM YAO: Okay, I think you lost them. Hey, it's weird, though. That school playground's been safe for months. I've got the report here. We sent in runners to check it clear, room by room, last month.

PAULA COHEN: You think it could be a deliberate deployment, then? By the comms station?

SAM YAO: Mm, maybe. I mean, it's a bit weird for a comms station, to be honest. Not only are they broadcasting Xena, their building used to be a distribution center for Geek King. You know, you know, the online retailer.

MAXINE MYERS: Yep. Which is why they have access to Xena DVDs.

PAULA COHEN: I'm surprised it hasn't been cleared out before now. People always want DVDs and stuff.

SAM YAO: [imitates Boromir from the Lord of the Rings] "Ah, but one does not simply get DVDs during a zombie apocalypse."

MAXINE MYERS: There's a dumbass rumor that this warehouse is full of kind of extreme nerds. Dangerous. Murdery.

SAM YAO: The Winchers. Like, imagine nerds, but if they went feral. Took cosplays too far, reenacted all the goriest parts of the stuff they're into. The rumor is they used to be 4chan "alpha male" believers, and then the zombie apocalypse came, and they blamed the feminazis, and - [sighs] they just went down that rabbit hole and just kept on going.

MAXINE MYERS: They're broadcasting Xena. No one who broadcasts Xena could be an evil man.

SAM YAO: What, even if they're setting zombie traps around their perimeter?

MAXINE MYERS: Well, we don't know that was them. We'll probably find some people holed up in there, sending out Xena clips to make contact with other fans. We'll get the cables and come back later with everyone's orders for specific Blake's 7 episodes and plastic lightsabers. [laughs] It's going to be great. Come on!

[door creaks open and clangs shut]

SAM YAO: Are you in?

MAXINE MYERS: We're in. This place is huge! And... kind of spooky.

[zombie moans]

PAULA COHEN: Uh oh. Not all the warehouse pickers are gone. Some of them have turned zombie. Look, they're still at work trying to fill internet orders. See that one stacking Game of Thrones box sets?

SAM YAO: Ooh, ooh! Do they have the last season? Because I never -

MAXINE MYERS: No, Sam. We're just here for Xena. I mean, Xena and those cables. Anyway, we've got to move fast. I think that one of them spotted us.

MAXINE MYERS: Quick, into this storeroom.

[door creaks open and snaps shut]

PAULA COHEN: Wait, this is the transmission room. See? There's the broadcasting equipment.

MAXINE MYERS: Yes. These are the cables, and - !

PAULA COHEN: Oh, the DVDs. Xena: Warrior Princess. Let's see. You know you said I'm your Gabrielle, but looking at this, maybe you're the Gabrielle and I'm the Xena.

MAXINE MYERS: Honey, you have never seen the show. How can you possibly know who's the Xena?

PAULA COHEN: Uh, because she's the one who has Warrior Princess in her name? I know what you like.

SAM YAO: Okay, I've got the cams up. Uh, yup, it's clear for you to come out of there. Those zoms are trapped in an aisle of Funko figures. Oh my God!

MAXINE MYERS: What? What is it?

SAM YAO: Well, they've got an Ursula from The Little Mermaid! Do you have any idea how – well, dear God, don't eat it! Look, if you pass those Funkos on your way out – oh God! I need another camera. There's something coming, in the shadows. Someone. Guys, I think you should get out of there. Go, now!

SAM YAO: Yeah, okay. Guys, just really keep running. I've got more cams up, and [sighs] no, it doesn't look good.

PAULA COHEN: More zoms?

SAM YAO: I don't really know how to say this, guys. It appears to be Voldemort.

MAXINE MYERS: What? Voldemort is coming after us?

PAULA COHEN: Someone dressed as Voldemort.

SAM YAO: Well, I guess. It just looks so like him! Ugh, no! I just got a full face view. Actually no nose.

PAULA COHEN: Someone who has dressed up as Voldemort, and taken it so seriously, they've cut off their own nose?

SAM YAO: He's heading your way. And oh. Oh! He has a mob behind him.

MAXINE MYERS: Death Eaters?

SAM YAO: More like Ewoks, or um, Daleks? But sort of a costume mash-up? They're Darwoks? Ewoleks? Oh, that is so wrong.

PAULA COHEN: I can hear them. Oh God, they sound so weird!

MAXINE MYERS: It's not just weird, it's them. Winchers are very real. Okay, I can admit when I was wrong. They're not going to be our friends. We are not going to reenact Xena together. We've got our DVDs, we've got our cables. We need to get out of here.

SAM YAO: Uh, okay, okay. Yeah, uh, right, then left, then third right. Go. Run!

MOB: [chants in the background] Sacrifice! Sacrifice...

PAULA COHEN: Sam, this is a dead end. And it's dark.

SAM YAO: Yeah. They've turned off the lights. And I think they've cut access to half my cams!

MAXINE MYERS: Where are the Winchers?

SAM YAO: Uh... no, I can't see them on the cams.

PAULA COHEN: If we hide here for a while, maybe they'll lose interest and we'll get away.

[door opens, MOB chants in background]

WINCHER: Oh, I don't think you'll be getting away. Not now, or ever!

MAXINE MYERS: Oh God, it's Voldemort. Ugh, your nose! Did you do that to yourself?

WINCHER: Call me Harold! Harold Wincher. And I was Voldemort, but now I am – [chokes] Ah. Sorry. Uh, could somebody help me with my robe? It was meant to fall dramatically to the floor by itself, but it snagged on the Elder Wand.

MAXINE MYERS: Sam, get us out of here!

WINCHER: I am... Lord Summerisle! ... It's uh, it's from The Wicker Man. Look, I had to put it together very hastily when we saw you approaching, and he doesn't have the same striking look as our old Voldy. But you know, I've yet to actually master Avada Kedavra, but everyone loves a barbecue!

SAM YAO and MAXINE MYERS and PAULA COHEN: What?!

SAM YAO: The end of The Wicker Man! They burn Edward Woodward alive! I think the Winchers are going to reenact that. Guys!

MAXINE MYERS: The mob are going to burn us alive!

PAULA COHEN: This was meant to be a date night.

WINCHER: Ewoks! Daleks! Seize them! Bind them to the poles!

SAM YAO: Yeah, I've got a clear eye line on the mob now. Oh my God, this is so many kinds of horrible. Uh, they're all in costume, but that one is wearing a Sith Lord robe with a Time Lord headdress. How could you? Also, guys, most of their costumes are bloodstained. They're really for real.

PAULA COHEN: Maxie, if this is it, I'm sorry I was so whiny about coming here. I love spending time with you. I can't believe I was jealous of your stupid show. I love you, Max.

MAXINE MYERS: Paula, I know, love. I do. And we've been through too much for it to end up like this. Right? They are crazy fans. I am a crazy fan. I know how to get under their skin. Wincher. Harold Wincher.

WINCHER: How may I help you, heathen? A last request before you are condemned to the flames?

MAXINE MYERS: Yes. My request is: be better! [MOB quiets] Harold, this reenactment is terrible! You're just wearing an Aran jumper. Lord Summerisle had a tweed jacket. Your mob of supposedly bloodthirsty pagan villagers look like they've run naked through the merch hall of Comic-Con, covered in glue! [MOB grumbles] And we're meant to be burned in a wicker man, not tied to poles.

WINCHER: Okay, but the wicker man is a very big prop. We had no lead time, and – oh God, she's right. This is a mess! None of you are even standing like bloodthirsty pagan villagers! I – look, I'm sorry. This was a rush job, and it shows. All right, take five. Let them go.

PAULA COHEN: That was amazing, Max.

MAXINE MYERS: Not now, honey. Quick, before they change their minds. Run!

PAULA COHEN: Okay, I have to admit, that was a pretty good date night for someone who likes seeing her girlfriend save the day by being brilliant.

MAXINE MYERS: What can I say? I'm pretty motivated when I'm trying to get home so I can watch Xena with my hot girlfriend... maybe dress up in my old Xena outfit for my hot girlfriend... reenact a few Xena bathing scenes with my hot girlfriend.

PAULA COHEN: Xena outfit, you say? Like the one on the DVD box? Mm, I don't hate it.

MAXINE MYERS: Oh, mine is way better than that. I made it from scrap metal in my spare time. What? [laughs] Isn't that what anyone would do in their spare time? [laughs] [continue chatting in the background]

SAM YAO: Hey, Five, now you've got those cables, I think I've worked out an alternative route home for you. How about you and me take a little detour and leave the doctors to it, hmm?

#zombies run #zrs6 #s6m7 #lessons in love #zr transcript #zrs6 spoilers

[thatshighlyoffensive]

THAT’S HIGHLY OFFENSIVE: MET GALA 2017

THAT’S HIGHLY OFFENSIVE: MET GALA 2017

Well, well, welcome to the annual skewering of Dummies with Money Pretending They Care About Anything Other Than Themselves AKA the Met Gala 2017 (or as Drew Jordan called it, “a party for relatives of famous people.” I hate most of the people that attended this year, plus my supply of fucks is as depleted as my bank account these days, so the positive reviews are scarce. Cat and I watched the E! red carpet coverage together and tried really hard to care, but it never happened. We were passionate about one thing though: Whoever manned the camera tonight should be fired and exiled to a country where they only photograph people from the shoulders up and then seek treatment for his obvious battle with Parkinson’s. HIGHLY OFFENSIVE. Enjoy!

Giuliana Rancid (who is obviously not at the actual event because she would never be invited to anything other than a Ruby Tuesday’s salad bar ribbon cutting) spent the evening with a bunch of other nobodies in a studio on the west coast and chose to drape her Antz body in the milky exoskeleton of one of her albino brethren.

I hate Katy Perry almost as much as I hate Lena Dunham, so the fact that she has dated my future husband John Mayer is something that whittles away at my black heart daily, and whatever the hell I’m looking at on the red carpet right now just took out another big chunk. I literally cannot, so that’s all.

Lily Collins looks like the Berries ’n’ Cream Starburst guy on his way to a Sophia Coppola sponsored transgender formal.

Kendall Jenner would be 100% perfection if she’d done something different with her hair. Those legs, MY GOD.

Kylie Jenner (as always) looks like Bruce Jenner in a Pretty Woman wig with a Kris Kardashian’s worth of plastic surgery in a girdle and pair of Steve Maddens.

Rose Byrne: The sun’ll come ouuuut tomorrow! Actually, it saw you tonight and decided not to.

Brie Larson looks like the love child of Babette the feather duster and one of my hand bells from middle school church choir in Dorothy Zbornak’s footwear.

Lily James looks like Natalie Portman from Black Swan wrapped in a Swiffer Wet Jet.

Rihanna looks like two Jimmy Dean sausage links wrapped in red licorice, stuffed into a clotted human heart piñata.

Naomi Watts looks more like Nicole Kidman every day. But probably my favorite look of the night.

Celine Dion looks like Jenna Lyons wrapped one of her old, bedazzled J. Crew tees in the Oscar gown she pulled out of Angelina Jolie’s trash can and secured it with the straps from one of the antique electric chairs Billy Bob is afraid of. #teamjolie

Bella Hadid- I don’t love all the weight she’s lost since becoming an ‘it’ girl/I’m insanely jealous, but her look harkens back to the origins of the MET ball aka the OG supermodels and the designers that loved them, so I give her look an A.

GiGi- While I really do appreciate your channeling of Christy Turlington (whether you meant to or not), I can’t say that I fully understand your look tonight. The color is that of a gout ridden tuna, the shape is that of a sushi wrapped tuna, and your panty hose are reminiscent of someone wrapping tuna in seaweed at Hibachi Express. Sanitation grade: C+

Chrissy Teigen looks like she always has: bloated and wild. Her outfit looks like a cotton gin exploded next to a L’eggs factory.

Lupita Nyongo looks like the Toucan Tropicana Barbie and that is all.

Ruby Rose is channeling some ‘She Sells Sea Shells by the Jersey Shore’ shit.

Miranda Kerr looks like a walking, glossy, coral reef, made up by Bobbi Boring Brown, as usual.

Rami Malek went to the Ball as a Twizzler. Or was it a Red Vine? #redvinesfamily

Zendaya: Mac-OW.

Paris Jackson: I have never been so offended by someone. First of all, she has about as much of Michael Jackson’s DNA in her as I do. Secondly, she looks like she put as much effort into her appearance tonight as I did when I dialed Dominos earlier. Also- Express’s formal collection has never looked worse. Also, also, your tattoos rival the mess of ink on a backstreet water rat.

Madonna- I didn’t think I could be more offended by a poseur than Paris Jackson, but again, I’m proven wrong. Her gap-toothed, fake-British bullshit can’t be hidden by all the camo in the world, and certainly not by one hideous dress.

Zoe Kravitz- Big Little Lies made me love her and this outfit does nothing but add to my new obsession. I could do without the sleeve contusions, but I’m obsessed with the rest. Like the finale of BLL, she’s channeling Audrey Hepburn like a boss.

Kate Hudson- Yo ass has looked the same every damn year. This year is the same, just more boring and like you’re trying to channel a Kartrashian aka HIGHLY OFFENSIVE. But also- i love you.

Gwyneth Paltrow looks like she ate Chelsea Handler and borrowed Titus’s pumps.

Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen: Two canoodling Weimaraners.

Lily Rose Depp: I actually love this. All of it. I am ashamed.

Sarah Paulson: And the cockatoo cried ‘Nevermore.’

Cara Delevigne: The Tin Man and The Nanny Named Fran had a baby. And it was ugly.

Rita Ora: Wasn’t it nice of Russell Stover to cater the red carpet?

Maggie Gyllenhaal: If Dorothy Draper, the Jolly Green Giant and a footless grandpa had a baby.

Halle Berry: Barnacles never looked so good.

Reese Witherspoon: Alexis Carrington would be proud. But that ponytail… She’d snatch it off.

Amy Schumer: So you ate Tonya Harding and then stole some kid’s Scarlet Witch cosplay outfit from their Orlando double-wide and threw it over your hamhocks? You belong IN a trash bag, not wrapped in one.

Kim Kartrasashian: An OB tampon at a Renaissance Faire. That is all.

J. Lo- You’re channeling Jennifer North and I love that, but your horse hair ponytail is highly offensive. And I’m not sure I get the color. But I think you and A. Rod make a perfect couple.

Karlie Kloss- Your shiny face is offensive. Stop. Your shoes are on point like a mosquito’s knee. Stop. Your dress is half terrible/half almost there. Stop. Put on a damn necklace. Stop.  

Kerry Washington- Whitney Houston in The Bodyguard with a lisp. Also- your lace front is almost as off-putting as Johnny Travolta’s. OFFENSIVE ON ALL COUNTS.

Blake Lively- I don’t know how someone makes golden chain mail with a peacock’s ass attached to it so boring, but you’ve done it. Also- you’ve done the braid/ponytail to death and made me want to follow suit. Death’s, not the hairstyle’s…

Jessica Chastain- Queen EleaBore of Land O’ Lakes called, she says you look melted.

Hailey Baldwin- I don’t know how dressing like a slutty piece of salt water taffy turned state’s surprise witness in a dog collar makes you a top model, but best regards and kindest wishes.

Nicki Minaj looks like Chun Li’s evil twin going to prom in Cleveland, Ohio.

So, Elle Fanning The Chinless Wonder thought tonight’s gala was an audition to be another boring ass Disney princess?

Mandy Moore- I love you more than anything because you are Rapunzel but NO. You are not Anjelica Huston in Addams Family.

Salma Hayek- you are naturally STUNNING and tonight you look OFFENSIVE and like a character from one of my brother’s anime shows. And not in a good way.

Selena Gomez made my eyes roll out of my head, onto the floor, out the door, into the street, and under the tire of Rachel Leigh Cook’s Volkswagen Rabbit.

Emma Roberts looks like a Jennifer Garner drag queen auditioning for the role of Jessica Rabbit in a high school production of Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

Priyanka Chopra is literally just wearing a trench coat. #carmensandiegoworeitbetter #andwithahat

Kate Bosworth always looks like a creepy Victorian doll with alopecia.

Worst dressed: Daisy Ridley, hands down. She looks like someone sewed fabric from the bargain bin onto one of those built-in-bra pajama dresses from Target and threaded a wonky hula hoop into the bottom. Hideous hair. No jewelry? HIGHLY OFFENSIVE.

BYEEEEEEEE

#metgala #metgala2017 #thatshighlyoffensive celebritiesaredumb

[reallypheelingit]

Pheel’s daily challenge list

so far when i missed days ive just been using my memory, so this will hopefully help keep me more organized haha

PART 2 HERE

January

Day 1: Winter Lucario Day 2: Axle and the Axels Day 3: Birthday Cubone Day 4: Kiki and Jiji Day 5: Alejo the Spewpa Day 6: Dragons with cookies Day 7: Saphirien Day 8: Delphox Day 9: Laser pointer Islacura Day 10: Null Day 11: Leslie and Danero Day 12: OC Cards 1 Day 13: OC Cards 2 Day 14: Nurupantarata Sneeze Day 15: Kyurem-Daily Day 16: Arcanine Day 17: Tyson (who is not Newton) Day 18: Falcata Day 19: Kyurem study  Day 20: Xurkitree Day 21: BotW Link Day 22: Red Dragon Day 23: Depin Day 24: Anattawam Day 25: Pokemon trainer ocs Day 26: Western Yuko Day 27: Chicken Tarragon Day 28: Gabite Day 29: 21 Pokemon Day 30: Silvally Day 31: Godzilla

February

Day 32: Sleepy Slowking Day 33: Nosepass Day 34: Luckypheel and Lilboop chickens Day 35: Flying Islacura in profile  Day 36: Birthday Ozomi Day 37: Mewtwo’s Birthday Day 38: Fuzzy Noodle w/ Whiskers Day 39: Raichu and Politoed Day 40: Yuuya Sakazaki Day 41: Rhydon Day 42: Apex and Pitcher Plants Day 43: Krookodile and Rockruff Day 44: Scrafty Day 45: Birthday Choco + Will and Nuala Day 46: Lugia/Kyurem bleps Day 47: Kanto Starter bleps Day 48: Blake the Liepard Day 49: Ingot Day 50: Islacura and Audino (day 50 digital art special!!)* Day 51: Blue Dragon plush Day 52: Keiji* Day 53: Lupe, Ixi, Draik and... Attic! Day 54: Dora K. and Agnes (and avocados) Day 55: Traveling Kyurem, Arcanine, and Dunsparce Day 56: Poppy and Fidel Catstro Day 57: Ignatius petting Zen, and also Bowser is there Day 58: Kasutamasabisu’s dragonsona Day 59: Death as a Dragon

March

Day 60: Swamp Siphooskii Day 61: Islacura, Noodly Dragon, Gator Orb Day 62: Some Guy, Kyurem, Log Gator Day 63: Arcanine Bag Search Day 64: Lyn and Dragonair, Airplane with Lati@s, dragons, other doodles Day 65: Alderstrom* Day 66: Careleon and Kasutamasabisu’s Dragonsona* Day 67: Flower Crown Mandibuzz Day 68: Bog the Crocodile Day 69: Mallamark Day 70: Carlton Day 71: Shy Guy Day 72: Kyurem in bow tie Day 73: Kommo-o Day 74: Galilei and Lilei Day 75: Garrett Thompson Day 76: Zuko in Dora K. pose Day 77: Null on a balloon Day 78: Rainbow Apex wearing the Apex shirt Day 79: Nykle Day 80: Flygon Day 81: Giratina* Day 82: Ludovica and Vikavolt Day 83: More fat gay dragons (aka careleon and saul’s sonas) Day 84: Avery pokemon selfie doodles Day 85: Nyork Nyork, Charizarp, robot dragons Day 86: Kyurem in a tutu (+ bonus afro kyurem) Day 87: Fasenso Day 88: Druddigon and Arcanine sonas Day 89: Sorbet the Piñata Dragon Day 90: Guzzlord

April

Day 91: Boro Day 92: Freya and Nuru need to learn how to sit on the couch!! Day 93: Wizard Blizzard Lizard Freyisbreen Day 94: Artichoke Day 95: Kangaskhan Day 96: Gravity and Dragons Day 97: The Dragon Day 98: Zorua Day 99: Shepe’s sona Day 100: Dancing Kyurem, and introducing Kronch* Day 101: Alderstrom and Siphooskii visit my college Day 102: Gliscor blep* Day 103: Damnsparce dragon Day 104: Kittibi* Day 105: Affidus Day 106: Palkia* Day 107: Keldeo Day 108: Hitmontop Day 109: Honoka and Lucia Oonishi (Ho-oh and Lugia) Day 110: Rosa and Swablu* Day 111: Bataari Day 112: Aggron* Day 113: Dragon poll results Day 114: Red Dunsparce and other jammy pokemon Day 115: Kyurem holding a balloon Day 116: Kirby Day 117: Eishelle dragon form Day 118: Kronch gijinka* Day 119: Thick outline Dunsparce* Day 120: Type: Null

May

Day 121: Shianna (and their motorcycle) Day 122: Pebsi Day 123: Bergot Day 124: Linnéa and Roserade Day 125: Tom Day 126: Isa Friez Day 127: Niko Day 128: Skye Day 129: Inniq Day 130: Kronch Day 131: Kelly Day 132: Felix Day 133: Lyn and Udon Day 134: Ludovica Day 135: Eloise Day 136: Arvid and Max Day 137: Attic Day 138: Fayko Day 139: ChanChan Day 140: Raven Day 141: Deborah Day 142: Silver Day 143: Nurupantarata/Giulia Day 144: Ramys Day 145: Fantasia Day 146: Vulpix Day 147: Poutine Day 148: Paisley Day 149: Mario-José Day 150: Petunia Day 151: Careleon

June

Day 152: Igha Day 153: Lady Boo Day 154: Isntbirds Dragon Day 155: Gaius* Day 156: Yee’s Sherky Day 157: Zen, Rina, and Cuthbert* Day 158: Sitting Islacura Day 159: Serperior Day 160: Keymintt Blog Dragon Day 161: Minccino Day 162: Ghetsis Day 163: Chill-artdude’s Tom Day 164: Groudon Day 165: Jerico Day 166: Lapras Day 167: Poppy Bros. Jr Day 168: Digital Freya* Day 169: Slowpoke Day 170: Bowser Day 171: Anattawam tests a pezzie Day 172: Kyraniu Day 173: Sonny and Pal Day 174: Kronch and Fugure OtGW Cosplay (collab)* Day 175: Haiko Day 176: Giorgio and Karina Day 177: Moussa Day 178: Princess Emeraude Day 179: Ojaiy Dragon Day 180: Miitopia Group Day 181: Kyurem/Pidgey fusion

July  continued on part 2

PART 2 HERE

(i discovered there’s apparently a point where too many links breaks them all so whoops)

#pheel talk #pheel daily challenge #should i go back and tag all the posts as that #or nah this masterlist works i guess?? #hmmm idk #not art

[almostnormalcomics]

Copy This! #49 is a 40-page, B&W info/news mini comic zine published by D. Blake Werts. Cover by Dale Martin.

Blake returns to the interviewer role this time around and shines the spotlight on Dale Martin! Blake and Dale start off with a discussion about Dale’s experiences living in different states. Then the two talk about the shifting comic convention scene away from original storytelling to fan art and cosplay. Next Dale provides some insight on balancing the creative process with self-promotion. Dale also delves a bit into his history of discovering the digest format, finding like-minded folks through APA-5, and losing a community of peers. Later Dale talks about the struggle of finding an audience somewhere between comics and zines, and the unexpected birth of Watusi the Talking Dog. Toward the end of the interview Dale and Blake talk about joys of attending SPACE and then dive a little deeper into Dale’s painting and collage work. The two end the interview with some thoughts on the future of comic periodicals and web comics.

In the community news and info section we’re treated to offerings from: Adam Yeater (One Last Day); Alexander Lay (The Blessed Bo Brimstone); Blair Wilson (Radium Lipstick Parade of Constituents); Charles Brubaker (The Fuzzy Princess); David Miller (Toadstool Tales); Edward Bolman (The White Buffalo Gazette); Jeff Clayton (JepComix); Joseph Tenney (Magick Mania); Pukka Joint Massif (Node Pajomo); and Tom Cherry (The Adventures of Leaf Erikson).

To get your hands on Copy This! and for more info contact:

D. Blake Werts 12339 Chesley Drive Charlotte, NC 28277 or email Blake at: bwerts (at) vnet (dot) net

#comics #minicomics #comix #zines #smallpress #selfpublish #indie #DIY

[thecomicsofsolitude]

Sensational She-Hulk Vol. 1 No. 4 (1989) Synopsis for "Tall DisOrder” Jennifer is getting dressed for her first meeting with her new boss. After trying several different outfits, she finally finds one that she feels is appropriate….. Published: 08/1989 Editor-in-Chief Tom DeFalco Cover Artist John Byrne Writer John Byrne Penciler John Byrne Inker Bob Wiacek Colorist Glynis Oliver Letterer Jim Novak Editor Bobbie Chase James DiGiovanna Appearing in "Tall DisOrder" Featured Characters: * Fantastic Four Vol 1 328]] She-Hulk Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 5]] Supporting Characters: * Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 3]] Louise Mason Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 7]]
(Appears in Flashback) * Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 3]] Blake Tower Sensational She-Hulk Vol 1 8]] Antagonists: * Iron Man Vol 1 225]] Stilt-Man |Fantastic Four Vol 1 336]] #thecomicsofsolitude #comicsofsolitude #comicbooks #comicbook #comic #comics #marvelcomics #dccomics #actioncomics #marvel #marvelstudios #marvellegends #marveluniverse #stanlee #dc #dcuniverse #dcextendeduniverse #dcfans #marvelfans #instagood #shehulk #themanofsteel #superman #supermansuit #love #cosplay #cosplayer #cosplayersofinstagram #superhero https://www.instagram.com/p/CSiotKksgu8/?utm_medium=tumblr

#thecomicsofsolitude #comicsofsolitude #comicbooks #comicbook #comic #comics #marvelcomics #dccomics #actioncomics #marvel #marvelstudios #marvellegends #marveluniverse #stanlee #dc #dcuniverse #dcextendeduniverse #dcfans #marvelfans #instagood #shehulk #themanofsteel #superman #supermansuit #love #cosplay #cosplayer #cosplayersofinstagram #superhero

[thefabulousfulcrum]

The Land of the Large Adult Son

via TheNewYorker

By Jia Tolentino

n January, 2015, shortly after Mike Huckabee announced that he was exploring a second bid for the Presidency, a Twitter user with the handle @JuliusIrvington posted an old Huckabee family photo in which the politician, wearing a blue-and-white striped shirt, sits next to his wife on a wooden bench. Behind them, three kids smile at the camera. On the right is a young Sarah Huckabee (now Sanders). Next to her are her two brothers, John Mark and David, who are the same size as their father and wear matching striped shirts. “My favorite thing in the world is that Mike Huckabee literally haslarge adult sons,” @JuliusIrvington wrote. 

This seems to be roughly when the large-son meme went more or less mainstream. It had been germinating in arcane corners of the Internet for a couple of years by then. In 2012, the Twitter user @MuscularSon, who eventually deleted his account, started tweeting in character as a beleaguered father of several mythically rowdy boys. “i cant control my enormous nerd sons. they force me to cosplay as a police box from Dr Who and take turns paintballing my enormous nude torso,” he wrote. And later, “my two awful big sons got into the 20 quarts of hummus i have and now their heading toward The City.” In November, 2013, @dril, the ur-account for this genre of absurdist online humor, tweeted, “i have trained my two fat identical sons to sit outside of my office and protect my brain from mindfreaks by meditating intensely.” In 2014, he tweeted, “please pray for my sons Thursten and Gorse, who have just glued themselves to a curtain.” By then, the image—a tornado of havoc around a couple of big, rambunctious sons—had somehow solidified as a comic trope.

The galaxy of large adult sons contains many constellations, and sons don’t necessarily have to be adults to belong. In November, 2014, the parody Web site Clickhole posted a BuzzFeed-style quiz called “Which One of My Garbage Sons Are You?” “I’ve got some shit boys,” the intro read. “My huge beautiful wife gave me children who think and speak like the toilet. I have four garbage sons: The first son is named Royce, the second son is named Preston, the third son is named Lance and Blake (two names for just one son), and the fourth son is the dreaded Laramie. Which one of my toxic sons are you? Take this quiz to find out!” My result: “You are a real trash mountain of a son who came marching out of my huge beautiful wife on the worst day to ever happen.” I was working at Gawker Media when this quiz was posted, and it derailed all operations for about an hour.

Once you’re made aware of the preponderance of large adult sons in our culture, you will start seeing large adult sons everywhere. Like all the best memes, it is essentially good-natured: “large” is a proud but gentle word, used in this context the way a gardener might talk about a beautiful butternut squash. The meme is also highly flexible, as Barry Petchesky, the deputy editor of Deadspin, pointed out to me over e-mail: “Literally every man in America is someone’s large adult son.” Sports media, in particular, has adapted it as a term for what Tom Ley, the managing editor of Deadspin, calls “big lovable galoots.” In April, SB Nation ran a piece unpacking “the myth of Aaron Judge, our large adult baseball son.” Sports Illustrated responded, arguing that the Cubs leftfielder Kyle Schwarber was the true large adult son of the M.L.B. (“How can anyone be said to match Schwarber in terms of being a big beefy boy?” Jon Tayler asked.)

But the Huckabee sons remain the poster boys for the meme. “They are very large, they are adult, and they are so clearly Huckabee’s sons,” Petchesky noted. They also fully fit the archetype. David, notoriously, once killed a dog at summer camp, and John Mark once acted in a low-budget film in which he smoked cigarettes while assuring a female character that it was normal to “suck a little dick to get a part.” This is classic large-adult-son behavior: alarming, with a whiff of the surreal. The Huckabee boys also remain cloaked by the cartoonish piety that undergirds their father’s politics. The situation resembles a 2014 @dril tweet: “my big sons have made a mess of the garage again after being riled up by the good word of the Lord.” The definitive quality of the large adult son is that he is endlessly excusable: though he does nothing right, he can do no wrong.

These days, it’s getting harder to separate the large-adult-son meme—one of the few reliably good things on the Internet—from the larger hellscape of adult-male behavior in which we all live. The Times recently ran a trifecta of pieces from writers across the ideological spectrum who all believe men are acting too much like boys. In a column titled “Before Manliness Loses Its Virtue,” David Brooks argued that it is embarrassing—for the country, but also for the institution of masculinity itself—that the President and several of his top advisers are openly needy, puerile, and immature. Senator Ben Sasse, of Nebraska, wrote a column about how, as a teen-ager, he used to perform hard agricultural labor on summer breaks: without the hard-won discipline he honed in the cornfields, he argued, kids these days will take too long to grow up. Jennifer Weiner wrote a column about the men who simply never have to, linking childish YouTube personalities to men like Billy Bush and Ryan Lochte, and—alone among these three columnists—to Donald Trump, Jr., the President’s oldest son.

Don, Jr., is generally portrayed, as he was by “Saturday Night Live,” as the more adult of Donald Trump’s two large adult sons—who are, like the Huckabee sons, prone to taking interesting photos together. But this summer Don, Jr., has become the rowdiest son of all. In July, after the Times reported that he had taken a meeting, in the spring of 2016, with a Kremlin-connected Russian lawyer in the hopes of obtaining negative information about Hillary Clinton, Don, Jr., confirmed the report by tweeting screenshots of the e-mail chain that led up to the meeting. “If it’s what you say I love it especially later in the summer,” he wrote, replying to Rob Goldstone, a British music publicist who had dangled “official documents and information that would incriminate Hillary.” Christopher Wray, Trump’s pick for F.B.I. director, pointed out that Don, Jr., should have taken this offer to the F.B.I. On Thursday afternoon, Reuters reported that grand-jury subpoenas had been issuedin connection with the meeting.

At thirty-nine, Don, Jr., is old enough to conduct himself with basic integrity—or, barring that, with basic competence in his plans to deceive. Many people have pointed out the painful absurdity of large adult sons in political families (Don, Jr.; Billy Bush; Ted Kennedy) being excused for shocking behavior well into their thirties when twelve-year-old Tamir Rice was deemed enough of a threat by Cleveland policemen to be shot dead on the sight of his toy gun, in 2014. Donald Trump, Jr., is a mere ten days younger than the French President, Emmanuel Macron. And still, President Trump dictated Don, Jr.,’s original statement and excused him after the scandal broke, calling Don, Jr., a “good boy.”

The large-adult-son meme takes wing from the idea that men overcompensate when they are humiliated, and that a primary source of this humiliation is interdependence—sons act out when they are defined by their fathers, and fathers are disgraced by the oafish flailing of their sons. But it’s memes all the way down with this Administration: Trump, the father of the large adult son of the summer, is himself, clearly, a large adult son. He is the loudmouthed, mischievous, and disorderly child of a presiding father. He loves to get behind the wheel of a truck and pose for the cameras like an important birthday boy. The Web site Gossip Cop recently ran an earnest post headlined “Donald Trump Does notWear ‘Adult Diapers,’ Despite Speculation.” These are strange times we live in. The seas are warming, the summer is ending; each day lasts a century, and we are everywhere ruled by large adult sons.