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gemini-sensei · 9 months

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This became longer than I thought it would, so CW for light choking, getting caught, threescore, bully x bullied smut, unprotected sex, spit roasting, rough sex and probably more (unedited)

Thinking about Cobra!Bully!Hawk fucking the daylights out of sweet!LaRusso!Reader in the locker room at a tournament. She's supposed to be out there cheering on her sis and dad's dojo, but instead she's getting her shit rocked while Hawk has her laid out over a bench, his hands around her neck while her pussy gushes and squelches around his fat cock.

"Look at you, my secret little play thing," he taunts, lightly squeezing her neck. "Bet your dad would be disappointed if he caught you getting fucked by a Cobra, am I right?"

She nods but barely, too lost in the roughness and the pleasure it gives her. All she can do is lay there and take it, squirming as his cock slams into her poor little cervix each time.

Suddenly the door opens and slams shut, and Hawk doesn't stop. He doesn't care that her pussy is echoing through through the once empty locker room, doesn't care that she's a moaning mess. He wants people to know what he can do to her, he wants then to know the sweet LaRusso isn't as innocent as most think.

Girlcock!Tory tlrounds the corner just to see Hawk with his gi pants just hanging off his ankle, his cock buried in the fat pussy of the LaRusso, and Reader's eyes rolling up at getting caught. It stirs her own dick in her pants and she lightly rubs herself over the fabric as she watches.

"Wow, who would have thought," she scoffs, feeling mean. She saunters up to stand over Reader, looking down at her with scornful eyes purely for the fact that Reader is Sam's sister. "Little Miss 'Stop the fighting!' likes getting her guts rearranged."

"I know right," Hawk grunts, smirking at the cutie under him as she wiggles and squirms. "Watch this."

He squeezes her neck again and Reader moans, then gasps. She reaches up to grab onto his hands, as if wanting to pull them off, but she doesn't. It's a game to her as much as it is to him. She loves it, but will never say it. Not as though she has to. Her body speaks enough for her mouth.

"Fuuuck," Tory groans.

Before long, she's shoving her own pants down and fisting her hard cock. Reader's eyes widen at the sight, mouth watering. Tory wastes no time feeding the LaRusso her cock and shoves it down her throat, uncaring in her heavy balls are pressed against Reader's face. Hawk squeezes her neck again, feeling the bulge of Tory's cock and making both ladies moan.

Then Tory is roughly fucking Reader's throat, pulling her to the edge of the bench so her head hangs off at just the right angle. She's rough and unapologetic, merciless.

At the same time, she's getting pounded by Hawk, who's muttering to himself about just how close he is. "So fucking tight for me. A fucking LaRusso all tight around my cock. Feels so fucking good, 'm gonna flood your guts. Gonna fill you up. Make You walk back out there to your dad with my load deep in your tight, fat cunt."

Reader moans and kicks her feet, unable to do much else as she lay between them, split open on their cocks from both ends. She's climbing up to her own orgasm but has no way of showing it other than kicking and flailing. Until she finally comes around his thick, fat cock as her velvet walls start squeezing him. Her back bows, her limbs fall limp, and she moans heavily around Tory's cock.

"Fuck, you want that? Fuck, I know you do. Your cunt is milking me, so I'm gonna give it to you. I'm gonna give it all to you," he grunts and slightly shifts his angle to pound into her harder. It's all wet slapping and harsh grunting. "Here it comes, LaRusso slut."

His cock throbs and his balls draw up. He slams into her a final time and starts grinding his hips against hers as he fills her cunt with torrents of cum. It's hot, spreading warmth throughout her as she feels him do it. Her walls coax every drop put of his cock and she loves it, but will never say it out loud. It isn't the first time he's utterly flooded her pussy and it certainly won't be the last.

Tory watches, grunting deeply as she watches. She's so pent up, has gone so long without a warm, wet hole to shove her dick in, she isnt far behind them. She shoves herself as far down Reader's throat as she can and comes, giving her a belly full of cum. She moans, shuts her eyes, and just let's it happen.

When she pulls out, Reader's makeup is messy. She's covered in spit and the last few drops of Tory's load. She tries to sit up, but Hawk has to ultimately hold her up, even though he's still bored in her hot, sensitive pussy. Before she can get a word out, he shushes her and she nods submissively.

"Damn, she's got a good mouth on her," Tory chuckles. She inspects the way Hawk holds Reader, like a glass doll even though he might as well have torn her to shreds; she's shaking under him, but not complaining. "I could get used to having her hang around."

At thay, Hawk glares harshly. "Feel lucky I even let you fuck her mouth. She's mine. Now go find your own girl."

Tory sneers at him as he stares her down, his venomous, brutal glare holding a promise that this was a one time thing. Reader LaRusso may have been under him, taking the pounding like a bitch, but Hawk gave it to her in a way only he could because they were a lot closer than what appeared on the surface. Out in the streets, to everyone else, they were natural enemies - he teased and taunted her after all; but in private it was a Shakespearian tale as old as time.

A LaRusso and a Cobra. Tory scoffs at the idea. In their world, it would never work.

She turns and leaves them to their own devices, as Hawk kisses Reader hard. He shows her his passion through action rather than words, because a snake can spit vemon all day long, but his heart beat solely for her. Whether her admitted it or not, she knew.

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mixelation · 6 months

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unfortunately i really like minato completely wrecking iwa's shit but it's fundamentally incompatible with the POINT of the whole arc because team 4 needs to wreck iwa's shit. so now im debating similar story beats but it's an "iwa kidnaps genin!naruto" scenario. sorry to iwa for being this fic's punching bag ig

i'm thinking it's a team 7 adventure? no one has c ranks go wrong like them....!!

i'm thinking iwa doesn't even take them back to iwa, but they somehow separate the genin from kakashi and hold them captive somewhere. story beats:

we can't just leave the kids as completely hapless prisoners, so sakura gets herself out of her cell and goes and gets the boys out. she does this by looking deep inside herself and asking: what would tori do?

now there's genin LOOSE in the PRISON. they do not know what they are doing but they DO know many ways to make a fire!!!!

i've been headcanoning that naruto just like. has hiraishin markers on an alarming amount of his possessions. some of them (like the ones on his clothes) are for safety and some of them are just "naruto keeps forgetting his bento places so minato's solution is to make it so he can teleport to where it is." unlike kushina naruto doesn't have any on his body bc they're permanent and minakushi wanted him to make the choice himself when he's older (like, minato could and would take it off if naruto asked, but letting naruto have independence and make his own choices is important to them)

anyway iwa is paranoid af so they've removed all of naruto's possessions. no hiraishin markers. BUT, if it's post Cave Incident, the limitation of the marker needing the jutsu user's chakra is gone!! so they just need to make a marker with their OWN chakra and get a message to minato somehow that he should use it

naruto: okay i can summon a small frog and i know how to draw the marker. i just uuuuh sasuke: what naruto: have no idea how to infuse chakra sasuke: why

anyway they figure something out and get a rescue. idk maybe it's not even minato. maybe they get team 4. maybe itachi gets to go a little feral about his brother

minato is like maaaaan i tried playing nice, but okay.

i think..... given the way i've set up fuinjutsu...... and given they can hijack other people's hiraishin markers...... the one tori made out of blood in a fit of spite should be a functioning marker now????

tori: yeah i mean it's blood, so. just do the math minato: omg math <3

so team 4 goes and gets the genin and minato goes and visits iwa. i do want him to be horrible about it so maybe he intentionally fucks around to set off alarms and get more people out and about. then he goes and find oonoki and is like. look. we talked about this. what the fuck, man.

and then he still paints a maker on his forehead <3

#this new version DOES lack itachi's '????? what the fuck' moment #which is sad :(#reborn au

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genericpuff · 11 months

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Rachel "Retcon" Smythe Strikes Again!

Okay, so I've been seeing pictures of Volume 4 of Lore Olympus floating around, and people are ALREADY FINDING RETCONS.

Most notably so far, some added panels in the Hades and Apollo confrontation that happens outside Artemis' house (when Persephone steals Apollo's lyre) in Episode 81.

This is the original scene, for anyone who needs a refresher:

Aaaand here are the panels that were added.

(all pictures of Volume 4 are courtesy @iwannagutyou on IG!!! thank you for giving me permission to use these! <3)

First of all, the art. It's so noticeably bad. You can tell Rachel has completely lost her ability to draw these characters in the S1 style, I'm fairly certain she took the panel of Hades from the old version and just copy pasted it to try and get around it (look at the posing) but it's incredibly obvious looking at that third panel that LO is not and can never be what it was back in 2017-2019. Those first two panels seem like they were copy pasted from the previous ones, which is just sad if those are the lengths she has to go to to come even close to replicating the older style.

Now, this just might be due to camera translation, it could very well look better IRL, but the colors just look so incredibly desaturated and the lines blurred out, to the point that people are doing double takes over whether or not panels have been directly changed - they haven't been, they've just been so sucked dry of their colors that they look off enough to cast suspicion.

If anything it's a harsh reminder that LO has kinda always had art problems, especially with its lazy humor and stupid meme faces.

Of course, to be fair, color loss can happen in print, but seeing how slapped together these books tend to be, I wouldn't be surprised if they just didn't put in the effort to convert the page art to CMYK or at least tinker with the saturation in editing some more to ensure it would come out more vibrant in print.

Now. Excuse me while I go on a bit of a crackpot rant here. Newbie puff pals beware, because this is gonna get dicey and you're about to learn where my tinfoil-hat rep comes from but I just have to talk about it.

Back to the added Apollo panels, where Persephone asks Hades not to hurt him and he looks nervous before she says "I just want him to leave".

Maybe it's just me, but it's a little weird that THESE are the panels they decided they needed to add. It's weird that she's asking Hades not to hurt Apollo when she's about to break into his car and steal his lyre just a few moments later. It's weird that the implication seems to be that she's referring to Hades' act of violence towards Tori... but Persephone doesn't know that's happened yet. So this feels like an unnecessary retcon that's doing more harm than good.

But I feel like the timing of this is kinda messed up as well, as this book released just days after the release of the last FP episode in which Apollo has his 'side' of the assault story told through his perspective, which is often considered a HUGE no-no in writing assault stories because it often comes with the implication that it's asking for empathy from the audience. We already know Apollo is delusional, we already know he thinks him and Persephone are meant to be despite her constant rejection of him, we didn't need a flashback from his own warped perspective explaining that very thing, the only purpose to do such a thing this late in the game would be to try and get the audience to 'connect' with him (it's giving S3 Bryce from 13 Reasons Why vibes). Now we have this scene of Persephone asking Hades not to hurt him (despite the structure of the episode being literally fine before, this change wasn't needed) getting snuck into the physical book release just a couple days after the newest FP tried to present Apollo in an empathetic light (and let me tell you, that's a whole essay and a half that I'll be getting into eventually).

Shit, if I wanted to get REAL Pepe Sylvia with it, I might say that hypothetically, the whole point of the random Leuce abuse episode - despite Persephone having no way of knowing what she attempted as Hades hadn't told her and she wasn't there to see it and we weren't shown her overhearing them in any way - and the following episode that was mostly padding of Hades and Persephone having sex - no consequences or follow-up whatsoever to the Leuce scene - was just to pad out the episode release schedule and buy time until the book came out so that Rachel could release that Apollo POV episode right before the book came out and revealed those new added scenes of Persephone asking Hades not to hurt Apollo, in what could be a sly artificial attempt at minimizing the SA plot so Rachel can finally just brush aside the one major plot point she regretted writing the most. After all, it wouldn't be the first time Rachel's controlled the pace of her comic to release certain moments at certain times that line up with IRL events.

But, y'know. I'm gonna quit on that thought while I'm ahead because it's probably making my credibility meter drop into the red. My ADHD has been real bad lately and it's really starting to show LMAO All ima say is that IDK who Rachel thinks she's fooling here, this kind of shit is stupid easy to fact check when the digital version of the comic is available online to read.

To end on a much funnier and lighter note, remember how Rachel tried to retcon the Demeter/Hera/Hestia relationship by changing the line "I miss my sisters" to "I miss my friends"? Well, there was one panel that had been missed in the webtoons version that still refers to them as sisters. You can still find this unedited line in Episode 78.

And uh. They forgot to fix it again for the book.

It's permanent now. That's permanent marker. It would have cost them nothing to find this in the webtoon version and fix it before it got sent to the book editors. Now it's gonna cost them thousands because the book editors didn't bother (or know) to check.

There's also this... weird shit going on with the speech bubbles. Like, they're REALLY FUCKING OVERDOING IT with the speech bubble outlines. I don't know who made this choice but it was a bad one. Gross. Don't do that. It looks so cheap.

But let's be real, at this point I feel like the book editors are just outright sabotaging Rachel because who the fuck calls themselves a professional when they do this shit-

Oh, and there's no bonus episode, just sketches. Which is fine. But it makes me chuckle to think that Rachel just didn't have time in her already razor-thin buffer to draw up a new episode to pass off as "cut content".

#i'm fired for that whole conspiracy bit aren't i #can you blame me when the wedding was lined up with valentine's day and dio's birth was lined up with mother's day #i swear to christ rachel does this on purpose it's so unhinged #just write a story #it doesn't make your comic 'deep' to line it up with real world dates that aren't gonna matter in 3 weeks anyways when they go up for free #it's just so unnecessary and pointless to do #lore olympus critical #lo critical #antiloreolympus #anti lore olympus

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t-305tv · 1 month

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Can you do one where there is couple competition and Beck enders him and Jade there thinking they are going to win but in the end they loose badly because beck literally knows nothing about jade and Tori and Andre win as they got entered accidentally. Beck and Jade get into a fight cuz they lost (mostly beck is screaming at jade while Jade just makes shandy comments about beck knowing nothing about her and him treating her like shit then say that André knows her better than beck and beck and André know jade for the same amount of time and that hell even Tori knows Jade better than Beck and Tori knows Jade less than Beck.) Ends with Jade forcing tori to go on a date as Jade lies to tori to come and keep her company since she doesn't want anyone cool to see her like this. pls.

Beck confidently smiled at Jade as they walked into the competition room for Karaoke Club's annual Couple's Competition. They had been dating for years, he knew Jade better than anyone. There was no way they could lose.

Beck and Jade were sure they had this couple's competition in the bag. After years of dating, they knew each other inside and out. But little did Beck know that Jade had been keeping a secret - she wasn't as well versed in his interests as he thought.

The first round was a questionnaire - each couple had to answer questions about their partner. Beck shrugged, this would be easy. But as the host read off question after question about Jade's favorite things, dreams, and history, Beck froze. He realized with horror he didn't actually know the answers. He glanced at Jade helplessly, but she just glared in response.

The host reads the first question: "What is your partner's favorite movie genre?"

Beck hesitates, forgetting if Jade prefers dark dramas or horror films the most. "Uh, something artsy?"

Jade glares daggers at him.

Meanwhile, Tori excitedly shouts "Musicals!" at the same time Andre answers "Musicals". They high five, already gaining points.

Next question: "What food does your partner hate the most?"

Beck racks his brain but draws a blank. "Uh, salads?"

Jade rolls her eyes so hard it looks painful.

Andre barely lets the host finish before answering "Coconut" at the same exact moment Tori says "Coconut!". They laugh, clearly in sync.

The host reads "What is the name of your partner's childhood stuffed animal?"

Beck's face falls, he has no idea. "Pony...no, Teddy? Hmm..."

Jade lets out an exasperated sigh.

Without missing a beat, Tori and Andre simultaneously respond to the easy question for them: "Mr. Purple!"

It's clear to the audience which couple actually knows each other, as Beck and Jade's answers continue to be way off mark. Their friends Tori and Andre are in perfect rhythm, cementing their victory with every perfectly aligned response.

For the next part of the competition, the host announces it's time for the couples to show their chemistry. Each pair must participate in a classic Newlywed Game-style question round.

Beck gulps nervously as the host reads the first question: "Who initiated your first kiss?"

He wracks his brain trying to remember, but in a panic blurts out "Me!" Jade's furious retort of "No it wasn't, idiot!" confirms he was wrong.

Meanwhile, Tori grins at Andre as they simultaneously tap their chins, remembering fondly. "It was when we were cast as leads in play ," they chorus together accurately.

The next question doesn't fare much better for Beck and Jade: "What is your partner's dream vacation spot?"

Beck stammers, "Uh, Paris?"

Rolling her eyes, Jade growls "No, you moron."

Andre smiles knowingly at Tori. "Japan to see the cherry blossoms," they say as one, beaming at their own right answer.

It's clear Beck doesn't stand a chance at this game. While Tori and Andre keep acing question after question, perfectly in sync, Beck and Jade can barely manage a single right response between them. They have no chemistry left - just resentment. Andre and Tori will easily snatch the victory.

For the final round, thehost announces it's time for the couples to serenade each other. Beck internally panics - he has no song prepared to express how he truly feels about Jade.

On the spot, he launches into a cheesy rendition of "Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Ashley. Jade scoffs at his generic choice and obviously false claims of deep understanding in the lyrics.

When it's Tori and Andre's turn, they share a smile. Andre begins to beatbox a familiar rhythm as Tori's warm voice fills the room with their original song "Tell Me That You Love Me".

The lyrics tell the story of their friendship turned romance, inside jokes woven in that have the audience laughing and awing. It's a heartfelt personal anthem only they could sing for each other.

When they finish, the crowd erupts into the loudest applause of the night. It's clear Tori and Andre have taken home the grand prize through talent, trust and true intimacy.

Beck tries to catch Jade's eyes, but she's already turned away, no longer interested in what he has to say. Their relationship faces an uncertain future after this failure to understand each other. In the end, Tori and Andre proved to be the ultimate victors.

The tension in the room was palpable as the couple competition drew to a close. Beck and Jade had entered the contest with high hopes, confident in their ability to prove that they were the ultimate power couple. But as the final scores were tallied, it became painfully clear that their confidence had been sorely misplaced.

"And the winners are... Andre and Tori!" the announcer declared, as the crowd erupted into cheers.

Beck's jaw dropped in disbelief, his eyes narrowing as he glared at the victorious couple. "This is impossible," he muttered, his voice tinged with frustration.

Beside him, Jade folded her arms across her chest, her expression a mixture of annoyance and amusement. "Face it, Beck. We lost fair and square," she remarked, her tone laced with sarcasm.

As the applause for Tori and Andre dies down, Beck turns to Jade, anger and embarrassment taking over his frustration bubbling over into anger. "This is all your fault!" he exclaimed, pointing an accusatory finger in her direction.

Jade raises an eyebrow. "My fault? You're the one who knew nothing about me."

"I'm your boyfriend, you should be an open book!" Beck shoots back.

Jade laughs bitterly. "Boyfriend? Please. You treat me like crap and don't even bother to learn a single thing in the years we've been together."

Beck scoffs. "That's not true, I know you better than anyone."

At that, Jade sees red. "Are you kidding? Andre there has known me just as long but he can rattle off my favorite color without even trying."

"And even little Miss Perfect Tori over there knows me better than you do. And she's only known me half as long as you," Jade spits venomously.

Beck is at a loss for words. Deep down, he knows she's right.

Jade fixes him with a cold glare. "Why don't you go be 'boyfriend of the year' to one of your mindless drones who'll worship you no questions asked. We're done."

She storms away, leaving Beck alone with nothing but the sinking realisation that he never truly knew the girl he called his girlfriend at all.

"That can't be true," Beck insisted stubbornly. "There's no way Tori and Andre know Jade better than I do."

Jade snorted derisively. "Wanna bet? Ask them anything, I guarantee they'll know the answers."

She strode over to where Tori and Andre were celebrating their win. "Hey Vega, Andre, prove to Beck here that you know me better."

Andre smiled confidently. "Lay it on us man, we got this."

Beck racked his brain for a question even he should know. "Okay, what's Jade's least favorite class?"

"Math," Tori answered immediately.

Jade nodded in confirmation. Beck looked unsure.

"Middle name?" Andre challenged.

"Alexis," Tori and Andre said together.

Beck frowned, not knowing that one.

"First concert she ever went to?" Tori prompted.

"The Scissors Sisters," Andre replied smoothly.

Jade smirked, further proving their point. Beck was floundering.

"Alright fine, you two clearly know pointless details about Jade better than I do," Beck admitted grudgingly. "But that doesn't prove you understand her or our relationship."

Jade glared at him coldly. "They understand me better than you ever did. Now leave me alone."

Defeated, Beck could only watch as Jade walked away with Tori and Andre, realizing he'd truly lost her for good.

They said that Jade clearly is uncomfortable on how friendly beck is with out girls and how he never sees to care about her or her feelings or even listening to Jade when she says what she doesnt like or when beck lets girls be all over him and never shuts them down by telling them he has a girlfriend.

As Beck watched Jade walk off with Tori and Andre, hurt and anger welled up inside him.

"This is ridiculous," he protested. "I've always been a great boyfriend. So what if I'm friendly with other girls?"

Andre gave him a pitying look. "Man, come on. We've all seen how you flirt and let other girls hang all over you. Even when Jade's right there, looking uncomfortable."

Tori nodded in agreement. "And you never listen when Jade tells you something makes her uncomfortable. Like when Christy was all over you at that party after Jade asked you not to invite her."

Hearing this, Jade's cold stare seemed to pierce right through Beck.

"See, they notice things you never do," she said harshly. "You've never cared about my feelings. Just parading me around as your trophy girlfriend while getting cozy with every other girl."

Beck was stunned, realizing maybe he hadn't been the best boyfriend after all.

"And it's not like you ever bother shutting other girls down by mentioning your so called 'girlfriend,'" Jade continued bitterly.

Her words sunk in heavily. Beck hung his head in shame - she was right. He'd been blind to how his actions hurt Jade while Andre and Tori paid attention.

"I - I never realized…" he said weakly. But the damage was done. Jade had finally had enough of his careless behavior.

She turned and walked away without another word, leaving Beck alone with the heavy truth - he'd lost her for good because he'd never truly cared enough to see things from her point of view.

After walking away from Beck, Jade was furious and upset. She didn't want to go home yet where she might run into her parents fighting again.

She called Tori. "Vega, get over here now. We're going out and you're coming with me."

"Um, why?" Tori asked hesitantly.

"Does it matter? Just get your perky butt over here in 10 minutes or I'm leaving without you," Jade snapped before hanging up.

True to her word, Jade pulled up in her car exactly 10 minutes later. Tori got in warily, wondering what she'd been roped into.

To her surprise, Jade drove them to the nicest restaurant in town. "You're paying, by the way," Jade informed her as they walked in.

Over dinner, Tori finally got up the courage to ask what was going on. Jade sighed heavily.

"Look, I just…I can't let anyone from school see me all sad over Beck. So you're my cover - no one will question the ice queen if she's out with little miss sunshine."

Tori's face softened with understanding. She reached out to give Jade's hand a gentle squeeze. "I'm here for you, no judgment. Let's just have a good girls' night, okay?"

Jade let out a small smile, grateful Tori had come without question to keep her company in her moment of weakness. Maybe they were more alike than she'd admit - and both needed each other more than they knew.

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chthonicgodling · 1 month

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/KICKS THE DOOR DOWN- omFG HELLO ITS FINALLY TIME FOR-

welcome to an Elysium Drama Update tHAT IVE BEEN VAGUING AND HYPING ABOUT FOR THREEEEEEEE MONTHS 😱 yes you ARE reading this correctly! After all this time of spiraling deeper and deeper RECENTLY and after the VERY long tumultuous past of the previous decade-ish - the Taki Fuego Trifecta Trio (their tag here) is HAVING AN ENTIRE BABY BY CHOICE AND ON PURPOSE— oh mmmmYYYY GGGGGGGOD—

All five of these illustrations feature completely canon dialogue dating back from January when they first started trying for a baby. now that Loki finally confirmed that he’s actually pregnant a few weeks ago - clearly out loud and in words - it is finally time to reveal this news to all of YOU!

Congratulations YOU are now part of a select few! NO ONE ELSE IN THE PALACE KNOWS YET.

The baby Loki is now incubating is sired by Tory!! with Maci of course knowingly and delightedly pulling all puppet strings “behind the scenes” aka like, to the left of them or whatever on the bed.💞How did this even fucking happen you may be asking??!!! They went from fun bedroom dynamic to let’s have an entire babBY?!?! Well- just like the way these playfully suggestive drawings (every one of these convos took place during…… during. uhhhhhhhhhh) are slyly ambiguous in the way I chose to draw them - let me explain the decision of this baby in the same,, extremely sanitized way:::

Maci and Tory.,,, will say.,,, literally anything. And During one such occasion,, it dawned on Loki - and them too, honestly — suddenly with a full record scratch that — wait are you actually being serious?? WAIT DO YOU *ACTUALLY* WANT A—

As nudged upon here and also in my many recent lore essays, please remember that Loki’s ~antsy~ when it comes to his pregnancies and history of children; due to the prior tragedies that had befallen the first six he’s always made it a habit of just vanishing, paranoid and anxious, each time he’s found himself pregnant. However Maci and Tory unequivocally and wholeheartedly asking him to make a baby with them because 💞love💞 and 💞lust💞 and 💞clingy vibes💞- again LITERALLY the first EVER baby ON PURPOSE EVER- was enough to IMMEDIATELY make him go starry eyed. Even though over these past few months since Tory first initiated the talk Loki had…. Still has……. refused to admit that and continued to be his usual vaguely hostile and suspicious self but….

As of today he’s six weeks pregnant (he can always, magically, tell right away) and he has not yet disappeared.in fact he hasn’t even left their BED or their SIDE in THREE MONTHS. 🥺 mhy god hellO., Loki you’re so full of shit and they’re onto you. Maybe stop blushing so much.

and so now begins the countdown to NEW MYSTERY BABY and the shenanigans that will follow; ONCE AGAIN I am FLOORED and THRILLED and WATCHING all this with my jaw on the FLOOR. ‼️they’re not a throuple this is just uhh fun things to do with your platonic friends!‼️ (oh my god I’m gonna lose my mind for fucking real—)

All the dialogue in the orange bubbles + Tory himself of course belong to @fenixethekid , hiatused, once again trying for real to kill me im pretty sure.Maci & all pink and green bubbles are mine; EeL is mine too idc; do NOT tag this with the m word; I hope this has been worth the hype (and I’m pretty sure I was EXTREMELY obvious about hinting at this so?!?!?! GOLD STAR IF YOU’D ALREADY GUESSED THIS NEWS!)

POPS CHAMPAGNE STAY TUUUUNEDDDDD

#LONG POST /#pregnancy /#nsfwtxt .??#my art #Elysium drama update #Taki fuego #eloki #Elysium comics #HEY!!!!! AAUGHHHHHGGFGFFFFF

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ectonurites · 2 years

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some portraits

#heartstopper #heartstopper netflix #tori spring #tao xu #elle argent #charlie spring #nick nelson #darcy olsson #tara jones #isaac henderson #imogen heaney #sam draws shit

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punsmaster69 · 5 months

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3/DEC/20XX

"I've always said that filling a glass to the brim is the most efficient method..."

flowey turned to me with the most shit-eating grin i think i've seen from him yet.

"But wow. I mean, really, 𝘞𝘖𝘞.

You reeaally took that to heart."

"soul, technically."

"Whatever. Point is, you've messed yourself up baadd."

"You can barely 𝘀𝗲𝗲!"

"noticed that. not why we're here though, petals."

"I- PETALS?!"

"Do NOT call me that!"

i considered saying something like, "ok, whatever you say, petals." but didn't.

flowey's not gonna actually help me if i piss him off too bad.

well.

helping is what i 𝘢𝘴𝘬𝘦𝘥 him to do...

instead he's taken the opportunity to get out all the snide remarks he's got about my whole overflow thing going on.

pretty sure he's been biting these back real hard while the others were around.

——

he's still going.

what a butthead.

hm.

know he likes...

dinosaurs.

dragons.

video games.

'specially that one character. a dino of some kind.

the color green.

drawing. (with frisk, usually.)

puzzles.

candy. loves candy.

loves anything sweet, really.

ok. any of those sound like gift ideas?

whatever. guess i'll figure it out later.

...

wow, he's still talking.

"......."

nevermind, he stopped.

"Why do you keep looking at me, then at the page?"

"Are you really writing ALL of this down?"

"nah."

"What ARE you writing, then?"

"just random thoughts."

"Ew. Nevermind. I don't wanna hear about whatever goes on in that probably-hollow skull of yours."

"k."

"got any ideas for frisk's, yet?"

flowey's face tells me he's forgotten that's why he was here to begin with.

"........."

and his silence tells me that he really doesn't have any.

"...ok."

"let's come back to this."

"got ideas for tori?"

"NO."

"what? can't get her gifts now?"

"You're gonna be all gross about it!"

"gross?"

"Romatical!"

"...romantic..al?"

"That's the word."

"romantic?"

"no 'a', no 'l'."

"You get what I mean!"

"not gonna be, 'romantical' about it."

"pure-intentioned holiday gifts."

"𝘏𝘰𝘭𝘪𝘥𝘢𝘺?"

"not sure what to call it anymore."

"Obviously-"

"Obviously..."

his face shifted as he thought about it.

"...Christmas."

"or gyftmas?"

"Have you just been calling it 'holiday' this whole time?"

"been switching between the three."

"so, no ideas?"

"........."

"ok. welp. since you've apparently only agreed to come here so you could berate me.."

"i'm kicking you out."

"....."

"Fine! Good! I don't wanna be in your terrible room anymore."

so i carried him to papyrus' room.

paps looked up from his book.

"HELLO SANS! AND HELLO, FLOWERY."

"Howdy."

with having set flowey on the end of paps' bed, that kid's decidedly no longer my problem.

"bug him for a while. i'm outta here."

"WHERE ARE YOU GOING?"

"back to bed."

"What??"

"gonna write the rest of the journal first, but yep."

"What time is it?"

"IT'S ABOUT NINE, I BELIEVE."

"...I spent three hours talking to YOU?!"

"OH! I SUPPOSE YOU SHOULD BE GETTING HOME, FLOWERY."

he closed his book and hopped up.

"AWAY WE GO!"

flowey was being carried out the door before he could even start to say anything about it.

——

still blank on the present-idea front, but there's plenty of december left to think it over.

maybe i'll ask tori about frisk's.

#undertale #journal #sans #flowey #papyrus #sans and flowey

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renata-has-thoughts · 1 year

Text

W/c: ~1.7k Pairing: gn!reader x John Constantine

Includes: NSFW, Top reader, handjobs, masturbation, car sex (sorta…ig…car handjobs?). 18+ per usual.

A/N: I HAVEN’T WRITTEN IN FOREVER. I’ll spare everyone the details, but this was quite possibly the worst period in my life to start a Tumblr blog. Shits been crazy. I’ll try and get more stuff out soon, apologies!!

Your boyfriend’s travels never failed to enthrall you. Without a doubt, they always came with surprises, ill-timed quips, and incredulous feats of the supernatural. You took a liking to being his ‘getaway driver’, or, essentially, just the person who brought the battered, bruised, and exhausted man home back in one piece. Especially considering he never ended up getting his driver’s license. It allowed ample time for John to splay out his daily adventures to you from his indefinitely-claimed shotgun seat.

“-I made it so complicated, forchristsake, in the end it was just about giving the soul back up to him. Easy.” John complained, bringing a lit, half-smoked cigarette back up to his lips as a sort of punctuation.

“Odd,” you smirked, “you have a sort of instinct to give it up easily,”

Your hands were on the wheel, eyes on the road, but you didn’t need to have any resounding focus on John to know he was giving you a stare from hell and back. You were thoroughly amused, and paid no effort in hiding a smile.

“You think you’re funny, dontcha?” He replied breathily, as if he had been punched in the gut by your words.

“Mm, in fact, I think I’m hilarious,”

Defeated, John turned his head back to greet the cigarette he held in his hand, eyes once again taking in the road before you both.

It was late, empty, and one-laned, lined by bowing trees, limbs extended as if praising the sky above. It was quiet.

John’s passenger side window was cracked just enough to create an escape route for the smoke to retreat. You could hear the background chirp of crickets and low tones of faraway owls in the thick summer air of the backroads. The atmosphere was pressingly calm.

John never was too big of a fan of calm.

He reached over to fiddle with the car radio with his free hand, still taking draws from his cigarette with the other.

“I’m not sure we’re going to get many inner-city stations out here, Johnny. I’ve got CDs in-“

“There we go.” John interrupted, settling on a strong connection he found. The music was a soft lilt amongst the rest of the night, a soothing and permeable volume. “Wanna know a secret?” John asked rhetorically, retracting his hand from the radio to rest on his inner thigh.

“I don’t really have an option, do I?”

“When I was younger, Blur was one of my guilty pleasure bands.”

So that’s which band was playing. The melodic undercurrent of your drive.

“John, a boy band fan. I can’t believe it.” You teased, tilting the corner of your mouth up. “And to think you were in the punk scene all whilst getting a rise outta probably some tories kids. What a poser.”

John winced playfully. “I had a crush on…fuck, uh…Damon, right. I had a crush on him throughout my teenage years.”

“I’m exceptionally jealous.” You remarked with sarcasm dwelling beneath your words.

“Mmm, well, I don’t recall him ever giving me a blowjob that resulted in what felt like two orgasms at once…so…I think you’ve no competition.” He grinned with heavy-lidded eyes, likely referencing the last time you two had fucked.

“Thank god. You may be a slut, John, but you’re mine, right?” You concluded, sparing a glance to meet his pretty eyes. His darted away from yours the second you made to latch onto them.

You feigned a pouting expression. “That’s no answer, Johnny.”

“Yeah, alright. I’m a slut, just for you.” He sighed, but not without the hint of humorous understanding.

“Atta boy.”

John made a barely audible strangled sound. So small picking up on it would be more difficult than a city station in the furrows of a forest. But still possible.

“Can you repeat that for me?” You encouraged, suddenly vying to hear his filthy back thoughts.

“I said,” John began, pressing the cigarette between clamped teeth, taking the now independent hand down to grope aimlessly one, two times at his groin. He emitted a staggered whimper in a pleased, desperate reaction.

“That’s what I thought. I expect no less of you.”

“Fuckin’ hell…” John grumbled, muffled by his smoking as he continued his habits, fingers extending and contracting around the swell in his pants.

“What a predicament. Constantine is so needy he’s taken to near-jacking off in my car.” You mocked, “Albeit I’m not all that surprised, if I’m being honest.”

“I’ve been away from you for a week now…cut me some fuckin’ slack.” He sighed, returning his hand to his cigarette, his other free hand swapping to pick up the responsibilities.

“I get that, but all I said was that you’re a slut. Now you’re getting off-“ -John impeded your words with a garbled moan- “just to my insults alone. Which…yeah, makes sense.”

“Shut up, I know, I know…” John muttered hazily, now unzipping his pants.

“Shut up? I thought you were enjoying me rambling dirty things to you.”

“T-Turn of phrase, you bastard,” John huffed, palming at the waistband of his now-exposed boxers, toying with the mere concept of touching himself.

“So is that a ‘keep going’ or-?”

“Yes, for fucks sake, that’s a keep going,” John complained, taking a quick drag from his cigarette before thrusting a hand down his pants to aimlessly grope at himself. He added a small, “please” eventually.

“Christ, John,” you chuckled, driving with one hand, the other kneading at your forehead as you shook it in disbelief. “You kill me sometimes. I mean,” you began, resting your elbow on the console between you two, offhandedly gesturing towards him as you spoke, “…I mean, you can’t even wait until we get home?”

“Not when you’re calling me your slut and bullshit like that, n-no,” John moaned, his cock now out and clasped in one hand, cigarette to mouth in the other, with his head thrown back.

“Damn you, pretty boy. Damn you.” You muttered as you felt your body stir amidst his moans. You had another twenty or so minutes to go until you got home. No way you could hold out.

“Pretty boy…hmhnnm…I like that a lot,” his hand was moving lazily now, thrusting from head to base in a tired grip.

“I’ve gotta admit, John, you had me pretty fucked over when you were gone all this week. I swear my moans would’ve turned a deaf man to a hearing one. All ‘cause of you, of course.”

“Tell me how you’d touch yourself.”

“Fast.” You said with finality, reveling in the cacophony of curses that melted from John when you said that. “...and rough. Just like how we fuck, hmm?”

“Yeah, yeah, just-just like how we fuck.” John gasped, breath only coming in sporadic, far between bursts, separated by an asphyxiated period of whines. One of which was a jumbled mess of your name. Soft and uncharacteristically vulnerable.

You’ve never parked a car on the side of the road faster.

“Fuck you, pretty boy. Fuck you and your stupid fucking pretty moans-” You grumbled, unlatching your seat belt and then leaning over the console, finding a position with your knees facing him, hand swatting his away so you could take over jerking him off.

“I love it when you steal control of the situation from me,” John moaned, leaning back into the chair, eyes fluttering closed as you took the reins for him.

“I know you do, Johnny, that's why I’m doing this. I’d go as far to say I know you to a fault, right? Knowing all your…” you flicked several fingers over the head of his cock while thrusting your hand, much to his audible pleasure, “...weaknesses.”

“Know me too well, know me too bloody well, fuck!” He rambled, absently bucking his hips into your grip several times with less than poor composure.

Taking note of his unbridled desperation, you picked up your pace to something nearing brutal. His breath picked up as a consequence you easily reveled in. You didn’t stop exploiting his sensitive spot around the head of his cock, and ended up with a grin every time he whimpered. Thank fuck this backroad was empty.

A low rumble grew in Constantine’s throat as he bit his lip, trying to gather himself under your influence.

“Don’t bother with that dignity bullshit, love. You know I love hearing you.” You reminded, careening over to kiss his exposed neck, with his head thrown back, you couldn’t help yourself.

“Okay, yeah, yeah…please-please keep going.” John sighed, his moans making him tremble at this point. “I think ‘m gonna cum.”

“Then cum for me, make a mess outta my hand.”

“Fuck-yeah, I w-will,” he groaned. Soon after his back arched and his eyes snapped tightly shut, shaking as he did as he promised, spilling over your still moving hand. You kept going throughout his orgasm, using his cum as a lubricant. Slowly but surely, you winded down as did he. His back straightened out, and his eyes fluttered back open to meet yours.

“Well, thanks.” He mumbled, smiling broadly, with the hint of weariness in his voice as he calmed down.

“Anytime, Constantine.” You replied, returning his pleased expression. Before he could stop you, you wiped your cum-ladened hand over his trenchcoat, drying it. He opened his mouth to tell you off, but you silenced him with a passionate kiss. He gave up the fight and melted into it, but when you pulled away, he muttered something along the lines of, “this is my nice coat.”

“Alright. Let's get ourselves back home, shall we?” You said, resuming your position in the driver’s seat, buckling yourself in. John, too, righted himself, slipping his boxers and pants back on with a small, shaky exhale of contentment. You added, as you shifted back into gear and got on the road, “We can finish what we started when we get back.”

“...finish?”

“Yeah, gps says we’ve got 15 minutes to go. Think you can recover in that time frame?”

“Do I think I can recover? One look at you and I’m painfully hard, love.”

“You’re such a charmer, Johnny.”

“I try.”

#John Constantine smut #john constantine x reader #Hellblazer smut #Hellblazer fanfiction #Hellblazer fanfic

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becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys · 2 years

Note

More on the whip… how do you get the job of the whip? Are they also MPs? How many are there in a party? When people talk about removing the whip does that mean you no longer get to hoard other people’s secrets? It sounds seriously messed up as a concept… When does it become blackmail!? Is this how a lot of votes on important meaningful laws go? Passing references to it never felt that bad before knowing what it is. It feels a lot more corrupt than it felt before (and it never felt great then)

Oh yeah you'll love this.

They are indeed MPs. Michael Gove was Chief Whip in 2014. Twas a dark time, although little did we fucking know, eh? You get a whole bunch per party - the Chief Whip, Deputy Chief Whip, and a family of smaller baby whips I suppose, all running around like scamps, pissing all over the concept of parliamentary privilege.

But, right, it's in a weird limbo state of THIS IS TOTALLY NOT A REAL JOB, HONEST, even though it is, and also literally everyone knows it is, so in order for them to be official and get paid they get given extra jobs. They do not actually do these extra jobs, you understand. They simply hold the titles so they can draw a wage, although, let's stress this again, they are also MPs and get an MP's salary as well.

These extra jobs come from two places: the first is the treasury. The Chief Whip gets to be Parliamentary Secretary to the Treasury, which is actually a cabinet position, and means they get to live in Downing Street at number 12.

The other, I absolutely shit you not at all, is the Royal Household.

...

Yeah.

Anyway, fun fact: did you know that as long as a whip only tells you you'll be rewarded for a good vote, and doesn't tell you you'll be punished for a bad vote, it doesn't constitute blackmail? Amazing! What a thing to learn.

Somehow, that does not constitute bribery.

Another fun fact! They're not allowed to tell MPs how to vote, because that would violate parliamentary privilege. But, did you know that if they stand in the Commons and use hand gestures when the vote is called to indicate yes or no, that doesn't count as telling MPs how to vote? Amazing! What a thing to learn.

They also have scales of severity for whipping. An MP will receive a letter about an upcoming vote from a Whip. It will say something like 'Your attendance is required. If it's underlined once, then you probably have to show up, and are strongly encouraged to obey. Underlined twice, and you have to show up and obey, or shit will hit the fan. Three times, and there have literally been instances of MPs being wheeled out of ambulances and into the House to vote, and if you defy the whip you get kicked out of the party and all your secrets leaked to the press. You HAVE to obey.

(This vote of no confidence was a three line whip. This is funny, because it was a secret vote.)

There are a handful of things the whips aren't allowed to influence, and they're generally'matters of conscience' - religion and equality, for example. Adoption law is one, though, and famously, Iain Duncan Smith destroyed his own Tory party leadership this way: he imposed a three line whip to try and stop unmarried couples from adopting children (your likely suspicions are correct - there was no same-sex marriage in the UK at the time, so he wanted to stop those icky gay people from having kids. Iain Duncan Smith was many things and one of those was a gross homophobic toenail.) Anyway it went real bad and he basically nuked his own leadership by doing it.

And... yes, this is how a lot of votes on important meaningful laws go. There's also what's called the 'payroll vote' - frontbenchers, being cabinet members, are on the payroll, and are much more likely to obey the whip. They go with it like... 99% of the time. The vote of no confidence was 59% in favour of BloJo the Clown, but if you remove the payroll vote, something like 75% of Tories wanted Johnson's pissed-on corpse in a ditch.

Anyway, all parties do this. Whips don't speak publicly, but you can look up who they are at any time.

What else can I tell you... Eh, that's probably about it. I mean, there's also the absolutely horrific system of hoarding secrets and hiding scandals so they can apply pressure, but I've talked about that already.

So yes, that's the totally normal and not at all corrupt whip system.

#politik #long post #asks

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