Package for Mr. Kaspbrak
Follow a package that is bound for Eddie as it goes through the office and thus through the hands of people, who all have their own perspective and opinions about him.
On AO3.
Ships: Richie x Eddie
Warnings: everything that is wrong with corporate America
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A package of files is delivered to the risk analysis company on Flower St LA on a Thursday morning. The delivery boy who brings the package vaguely recognizes the name Edward Kaspbrak, but not in a manner that matters to him.
The man in the mailroom, Chad, whom he hands it to however, does know the name a little better. He often handles packages addressed to him and has heard all the gossip. He used to be a fan of Richie Tozier, before he came out, but he isn’t a fan of the new content.
Chad is a little bit of a bigot and denied ever having liked Richie’s work whenever asked. But he had followed Richie’s coming out, hoping it was all a joke. When it turned out it wasn’t he got annoyed, posted some hate, then went on with his life.
Alas, the universe has a funny way of getting back to him. Because it was after that, that he realizes one of the new names in the company is Richie’s famed boyfriend. Now he’s stuck way further down on the ladder, sorting his mail.
So, he takes the package, scoffs at the name and puts it on the right pile, hoping the intern will come pick it up soon.
Kamaria, the intern, is on her way to the mailroom to make her rounds. She knows that her internship means being the lowest on the ladder, she just hadn’t counted on that meaning that her job is to play delivering service.
It’s practically a crime she doesn’t get paid for this. She already has it bad enough with the micro aggressions she has to deal with on a daily basis. The mailroom itself is a minefield and she hates Chad, who works there.
She had her fingers crossed that he was out sick, however that doesn’t seem to be the case, because she is greeted with: “There you are, finally. God you all are so lazy.”
Now, Kamaria isn’t lazy and she knows that. She also knows that telling Chad that won’t do her any good, so she ignores it. One has to ignore a lot if you want to make it far as a minority in corporate America.
So, she just loads the cart with mail as quickly as she can, before getting out of there. She doesn’t speak a word to Chad, privately hopes he falls down the stairs or something.
She pushes the cart by the offices on the manager floor in the main analysis department, who she interns for. Not that she does much actual analyzing, unless they are too close to the deadline and push their work on her.
The secretary for Mr. Hearding, Karen, always calls her Kim, despite her many corrections and complains that she is late, despite the fact that Kamaria is on time every morning, including this one.
Linda, the secretary for Mr. Sullivan, greets her pleasantly and has to gossip. Linda isn’t so bad, thought a bit too into conspiracies, which connects to her love of gossip. On this morning, she says: “Did you hear about Mr. Kaspbrak?”
While claiming to be above it, Kamaria absolutely isn’t, so she replies: “No, what happened?” with a little bit of guilt. She cuts herself some slack, however. There is hardly any entertainment here and it is not like someone so far above her in the company ecosystem will care about what she, a low intern, has heard or said about him.
“Apparently he used to work in the New York branch,” Linda says, which is something everyone knows, so Kamaria is about to roll her eyes and move on, but then Linda goes on. “He transferred because of a very nasty divorce. He has a restraining order against his wife. My cousin is a hairdresser there, she heard all about it from the ex-wife. He ran away with that comedian after a reunion. Totally out of the blue.”
“Oh really,” Kamaria replies, thinking that talking about her boss’ private life like this went a little too far. So, she hands Linda Mr. Sullivan’s packages and quickly moves on to the last few in the hall, finally landing in front of Mr. Kaspbrak’s secretary, Hannah.
Hannah smiles at Kamaria kindly, making her feel a little guilty for listening to Linda, though she thought she was about to hear so manager break room drama, not the man’s nasty divorce.
“Thank you, Kamaria,” Hannah says, taking the package from her. “Any plans for the weekend? Or still trying to survive until Friday?”
“Trying to survive,” Kamaria smiles, not telling someone with a direct line to her boss that she is going out partying. “You?”
Hannah knows she is not entirely honest, but lets it slides. She remembers what it is like to be young. So, she puts the packages down to sort through later and says: “Me and Jacob are visiting my parents this weekend.”
“Oh, have fun,” Kamaria says, before walking back to her desk with the now empty cart.
Hannah watches her go, before looking through the pile just delivered onto her desk. There isn’t much, however, she sees a thick packet that is probably the files Mr. Kaspbrak, or Edward, as she is allowed to call him, is waiting for.
She takes the pile and walks into Edward’s office holding them. He is working on his computer and looks up when she comes in, smiling when he sees it’s her. Edward isn’t the most sociable person there is, Hannah knows. However, she doesn’t mind much, because he is a good boss.
Unlike some of the horror stories she hears from other secretaries, Edward’s particularities are very mild. He is a bit of a clean freak, but at least he doesn’t grope her or yell at her for things out of her control. On top of that, he gave her free Yom Kippur, giving her a sad smile and telling her he lost an old friend, who was Jewish before moving to the LA branch.
It’s little moments like those, which makes working for Edward bearable. He is mostly known as a strict man throughout the company, but he just likes to get things done on time and have those things done well. He has high expectations of himself and expects the same quality from everyone else.
Hannah has figured out how to meet his standard and now he is nothing but pleasant. She considers herself very lucky.
So, she returns his smile with one of her own and pleasantly says: “A delivery just came in. I think the Lemmin Inc. files are here.”
“Ah, thank you, Hannah,” Edward replies, taking the package from her and opening it. She waits as he studies it, knowing the request that will come. Indeed he asks: “Could you copy these for me, please? I need six for the meeting.”
“Of course,” she answers, taking them and going to the copy machine to do just that.
She had once asked him why he copied these things instead of handing them out digitally. He told her that nothing is as confronting as a physical manifestation of something. Having a task you can’t minimize on a screen, but something that takes up space on your desk, makes that you complete it faster. It was a sensible answer, but the way he said it made her a little uneasy.
Edward has the habit of suddenly getting intense sometime. It is always a little odd when his eyes go all serious and he says something profound or confounding.
Hannah privately thinks it’s because of that accident he was in a few years ago. It’s the reason he now walks with a cane and she does a little more leg work than the average secretary. He divorced his wife afterwards and got together with a famous comedian. Quite a nasty divorce she knows, because she has had to block the ex-wife from calling.
She can imagine how such an accident will make one reevaluate themselves and Edward seems happy, so she can’t imagine it was such a bad change.
The gossip made the rounds when he first started working there, Hannah in the middle of it. They are all curious how Edward is as a boss, if he is anything like the anecdotes Trashmouth Tozier likes to tell on stage.
Hannah doesn’t see much of the argumentative, competitive, concerned, overbearing boyfriend in her boss. However, she knows that everyone has a version of themselves they are at work. Edward is no different. And she sees how he can be whenever Richie calls the office, how much he smiles and rolls his eyes, albeit fondly. It’s sweet.
She gets to the copier and scans the pages to be printed. It’s mindless work, but Hannah doesn’t mind. It is part of her job and she likes it. A quiet moment to herself.
The moment sadly doesn’t stay quiet.
Linda, Mr. Sullivan’s secretary, comes over when she’s busy. Linda is an absolute gossip and believes everything she reads on the internet. Hannah promises herself that if she starts about the ‘secret elite’ running everything again, she is going to snap and walk away.
Instead Linda goes on about another topic of interest to her. Edward Kaspbrak. She doesn’t even say hello, just starts: “I heard Mr. Kaspbrak has a restraining order against his wife. I’d be careful with him, if I were you. Someone willing to go to such extreme’s over something mild is dangerous, I’m telling you.”
In turn Hannah only hums in acknowledgment, not wanting to start a fight this early in the morning over Edward’s divorce of all things. She herself doesn’t think it was anything mild, but that is likely because she had the distinct displeasure of talking to Myra. However, she is not telling Linda that, she can be like a shark.
“I mean, honestly, you never hear a man getting a restraining order against a women,” Linda continues on, despite getting no encouragement to do so. “It feels fishy. He probably made up all sort of horrible things about her to keep the money. He seems the type.”
This is a little far and Hannah doesn’t want Linda spreading such nonsense further, Edward has enough weird rumors going around as it is. So, as politely as she can manage, she says: “I think this is not the sort of topic to speculate on.”
“Alright, alright,” Linda says, holding up her hands as if she is surrendering. Her tone makes it obvious that she thinks Hannah is a stuck up bitch, but Hannah doesn’t care.
“Did you need to use the printer?” she asks, when Linda doesn’t leave.
“Oh no, I just came to check if you needed any help,” Linda tells her. “Mr. Kaspbrak always makes you do the carrying. He’s a man, he should be able to get his own papers, not use you like some sort of servant. Don’t you think.”
“Edward needs a cane to walk, Linda. He is not allowed to do his carrying,” Hannah snaps slightly, needing Linda to stop talking.
Edward has many times apologized for all the work she needs to do for him, but she does not blame him. The company is afraid he’ll sue if something happens to him, so that means Hannah has a few more physical tasks. In her opinion he more than makes up for it by keeping to the schedule by himself. She would rather carry a little more than constantly play nanny like she sees the other secretaries do.
“I think he’s just being dramatic,” Linda informs her conspiratorially.
Right when Hannah is about to smack Linda, the copier beeps that it is done and she gratefully makes her exit with the files she needs. One of these days she is reporting Linda to HR. She would have done so already, if Edward hadn’t requested she not cause a fuss surrounding his disability. He hates the attention and scrutiny.
She shakes off the frown and annoyance Linda has left her with and goes to Edward’s office, leaving the stack on his desk with a smile and without a word, because he is in a call right now. So, he only gives her a smile back, before she retreats.
Eddie flips through the files that were delivered this morning idly. Most of the information in the files are already known to him, but it doesn’t hurt to glance at it again before his presentation on the Lemmin Inc. assessment later.
On the phone he is listening Todd, who is working on the case with him later. If Eddie is honest, he doesn’t like Todd much. He always has something to say or complain about, but never any solutions himself. Plus, he has terrible timing. They have a meeting in an hour, Eddie is sure these questions can wait.
He tells Todd as much and hangs up. He wants to get as much work done as he can in the hour he has. Tonight he and Richie are meeting up with the rest of the Losers. Everyone is flying in to LA for a get together.
They try to get together whenever they can, all of them still a little afraid that they will forget everyone when they don’t see each other for a while.
When the hour is over, he gather the files for the case and gets to the meeting. He likes to make notes on them, before scanning them in and sending them digitally.
He puts the files on the table, so everyone has them and they don’t have any delays when starting up. Eddie is in the middle of setting up his power point when Todd enters. He mentally sighs before putting on a neutral look and greeting Todd.
Todd picks up his packet and flips through it. He scans for a little bit, but doesn’t really read it, Mr. Kaspbrak isn’t his favorite to work with and he’s pretty sure the feeling is mutual. However, he has worked together with the man often enough to know that reading it all is pointless. Mr. Kaspbrak will explain anyway.
“Todd,” Mr. Kaspbrak greets and Todd feels a stab of annoyance go through him. Todd has been with the company since his internship, yet when it came time for what should be his promotion, his spot had been taken by Mr. Kaspbrak. A transfer.
Now Mr. Kaspbrak is above him in the hierarchy, leaving Todd to call him Mr. Kaspbrak while he could call him Todd. It frustrated him to no end. So, he always tries to trip him up, make him look incompetent, so that Todd would get his promotion, but so far no dice.
“Mr. Kaspbrak,” Todd greets back pleasantly, but with an undertone. It’s one of the first skills he learned when he started in the field.
After the greeting Mr. Kaspbrak goes back to setting up, which also irks Todd, who believes he should never be ignored like this. So, he leafs through the files again, then asks: “Has there been proper communication with the client about their needs?”
It is quiet for a second as Mr. Kaspbrak looks up, if Todd had better eyes, he would have seen the murder hiding in them, however, he does not. So, he misses the layer of being utterly done as Mr. Kaspbrak answers: “Yes, there has been.”
“Okay, good, just checking,” Todd says, sitting down.
The others are already dropping in, which is far more interesting than Mr. Kaspbrak. Brady enters and Todd knows he just got a yacht for his birthday, so he abandons any pretense of being interested in favor of asking about it.
They are just getting into the parties Brady plans on throwing when Mr. Kaspbrak makes them stop in favor of his boring meeting.
Todd hates being in meetings like these. His father wanted him to make something of himself and if he didn’t then he might not get his inheritance. So, here he is listening to Mr. Kasprbak babble on about numbers.
He’s obviously gay, Todd thinks to himself, with how proper and uptight he always is. If he has to bet, he’d say Mr. Kaspbrak got that promotion over him as a diversity hire. Every company is doing that nowadays. There’s one black intern too, she’s under Mr. Kaspbrak. Let her, those talentless people should be clumped together away from the hardworking American’s, who actually earned their spot.
After that he scratches his face and thinks of whether he can convince his father to buy him a vacation house in the Caribbean, since he has spend all of his own salary and allowance on a few very nice cars.
Once he has decided he probably could, he raises his hand and asks a probing question. He has to keep Mr. Kaspbrak on his toes. Besides one of these days Mr. Kaspbrak won’t have a good answer, which will show everyone that Todd is a much better candidate for his position.
Unbeknownst to Todd, his question had been answered in the presentation earlier and thus an annoyance to anyone who had been paying attention. Todd just notes that Mr. Kaspbrak looks annoyed when answering, which isn’t very professional.
To distract himself, Todd crumbles the paper in front of him, refraining himself from doodling on the files. They always get the files digitally afterwards anyway.
This continues on for another half an hour before Mr. Kaspbrak finally lets them go. Todd sighs of relief and gets up, talking with Brady as they go to the break room. Actually working is for the interns under them.
In the break room Todd sees the crumpled packet of paper still in his hand that he throws in the trash. As he does so, he gripes: “I can’t believe the old fashion-ness. Paper? I mean, really? You would think he’s sixty not forty.”
The comment gets some laughs. Brady commenting: “Well, that hot secretary heard he had a nasty divorce, probably aged him twenty years.”
Everyone laughs again, before Connor, one of the other lads Todd knows from Harvard, says: “I can see it, but I don’t know if you should trust her. I mean, I’d fuck her, but you gotta be careful who you listen to. Last week she claimed he got that scar on his face because he was attacked by a madman with a knife.”
“You’re kidding,” Todd snorts. “That’s ridiculous. I mean have you seen him? I could pick him up without issue.”
“That’s what I said,” Connor rolls his eyes with a grin.
They continue talking like that for a little while, before going to shoot the shit at their desks, leaving the break room an absolute mess.
Nico sees them leaves and silently seethes a bit at them. He won’t ever say something about it to them, he has transitioned years ago, but jerks like that always seem to be able to pick him out of the crowd, so he is far too attached on the invisibility being a janitor grants him.
So, yeah, he seethes quietly as he watches, having timed his round by when they’ll leave, knowing that his work will otherwise immediately be undone. He also doesn’t like how they use the interns as coffee maids, but at least the interns know how to keep a room tidy.
Still, it is his job, so he sets to work. Emptying the trashcan and picking up everything that hasn’t made it into the trashcan. He doesn’t see the packet of paper that gets buried under used napkins and empty packaging.
Once this break room is clean again, he starts pushing his cart to the elevator. Nico quite likes his job, in all honesty. It’s not that bad. Just the people are.
The elevator dings and he pushes his cart in, the man already there moving to the side to give him space. He thanks him with a smile, getting one in turn from the man, who Nico actually recognizes, because it is Richie Tozier.
He has to admit the first time he ran into Richie he had been kind of star struck. Ever since he came out, he has become a bit of a household name in the queer community. Nico loves his newer work about his life as an older, recently out, gay man and his struggles growing up. Of course, Nice also loves the bits about his husband, but it’s always a bit odd that he cleans the office of the husband of Richie ‘Trashmouth’ Tozier.
However, Nico can see the Eddie Richie talks about in Mr. Kaspbrak, albeit it still confuses him from time to time. Mr. Kaspbrak is always so professional that if Nico didn’t know better he would assume the man lived at the office, or was some sort of pod-person created to work in an office.
But Nico knows better, because he has seen Richie’s bits about Eddie being an argumentative potty mouthed little shit, who can be the worst mother hen, yet still loves Richie very much even if he keeps telling him he loves Eddie’s mom more.
Richie also has bits about the germophobia his boyfriend has, which is where Nico can see Mr. Kaspbrak best.
It can be a serious fear, Nico knows, but Mr. Kaspbrak is one of his favorite workers in the company because of it. To him, Mr. Kaspbrak is always cordial and kind, leaving a big tip each month, because he recognizes the work Nico puts in to keep the office clean and how important that is. Furthermore, his own office is always already very clean, which means Nico doesn’t have much work with cleaning it.
All in all, Nico likes Mr. Kaspbrak.
The elevator dings open and Richie perks up from his phone as they both get out of the elevator. It is a little awkward as they continue to head in the same direction until they reach the toilets where Nico halts as Richie continues on.
As he starts cleaning, he can hear Richie yell in the distance: “Eddie Spaghetti, come eat lunch with me! You’ll suffocate in that tie.”
Mr. Kaspbrak returns in an out of character manner that only happens when Richie is near him, when he’s more Eddie than Mr. Kaspbrak. “It is not even lunch hour yet, dickwad. Not all of us can just leave.”
“Lies and slander,” Richie replies. “Come on, you work hard enough to skip out early. You’re not a coward, are you?”
“This has nothing to do with what you said,” Eddie says and Richie laughs loudly. A little bit later they walk by the toilets Nico is cleaning, on their way to lunch. Eddie gives him a nod when their eyes happen to lock and Nico nods back equally friendly.
Later he walks by Linda’s desk, god does he despise her almost as much as the frat bros a few levels down. She is telling Karen: “I mean, did you see how he was dressed. I bet he and Mr. Kaspbrak are close to going bankrupt.”
Nico thinks of the tip Mr. Kaspbrak always leaves him and the Beverly Marsh jacket Richie was wearing when he came in, so he rolls his eyes as he highly doubts that.
At the end of the day, the files that came in that morning are laying in the big dump next to the office building of the risk analysis company on Flower St LA. The garbage collectors that come to pick it up, have no clue it related to Edward Kaspbrak, unaware he even works in the building and neither a stand up fan.
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A/N:
Please note that I have never worked in the corporate world (something I’m grateful for, because I hated most of the character I made up for this lmao) and I don’t plan on it, so enjoy this with a grain of salt
I thought it would be fun to see from the perspective of the files as they’re handed from person to person, you know, but let me know what you think!
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Spinning at the Edge of the World - Frankie & Zari Flashback
Tagging: Frankie King & Zari Thomas
Timeline: about ten years ago.
A/N: Frankie is tormented by their addiction. The people they spend time with doesn’t help that matter much. They’re discovering who they are and dealing with the loss of their family all at once. Frankie graduated high school at 16 and has already been at University for one. Zari is a Junior in high school. They met in Zari’s freshmen year.
Trigger Warnings: Addiction, depression, loss
“ We only said goodbye with words, I died a hundred times, You go back to her
And I go back to ..I go back to us”
“Isn’t she amazing?” Trevor gestured toward Frankie who was just finishing up their rendition of Back to Black by Amy Winehouse.
“They. Aren’t they amazing.” Zari pointed out and rolled their eyes at Frankie’s new boyfriend. Truthfully, they were surprised to see Frankie come around. They had heard through the grape vine that college was keeping them pretty busy. That and this Trevor guy that just didn’t seem to fit in with what Zari and Frankie and the rest of the band had going on. “If you’re going to support them, you have to get it right.”
“Support what, Z? Come on. That’s all some bullshit. Frankie doesn’t have her head on straight most days. Please. This is some phase, etcetera.” He shook his head and then stood up to clap for his girlfriend. “Anyway, do you have that stuff I asked for?”
It was strange being caught in this predicament. Zari dealt to make more money but it only meant they were part of the problem. And dealing meant dealing to Trevor which mean it went to Frankie too. They weren’t so sure how they felt about that. The thing is, Frankie needed the help. Losing the only family they had dragged them all the way to hell and it seemed like the world wanted to keep them there. “THEY are only out of their heads because you put them there.”
“Oh look at you preaching, high school kid. you’ve been dealing to me for months. Now you have a conscience?”
“Hey guys! That was so good! So SO good! I can’t believe I was back on stage like that and...”
“Frankie! You should sing for us more. The band is going on tour after we all graduate and since you’re teen genius already taking over the world, really you’re just waiting on us.”
“Frankie is busy with school, Zari. High school bands are not on her resume.”
“Their. Trevor, I already told you.” Frankie reached for the beer on the table and took one giant swig. “You gotta, you gotta get it right. It’s important to me and that’s just how it is. Yeah? You gotta get it right.”
“Excuse us.” Zari grabbed Frankie by the hand and pulled them into the bathroom. “For the smartest person I know, you’re fucking up royally.”
“I beg your pardon, I have a 4.0. Genius, remember? Did you bring the shit I told you to bring?” Frankie was trying really hard not to spiral especially when they had class in the morning but their body was shaking at this point.”
“Why’d you buy this shit, Frankie? I thought you said Addies and that’s it.” Zari handed them the giant package of a variety of downers.Even if they should feel guilty, it was only a low percent and Zari hated themselves for it.
“Thank you.” And in the most difficult moment of their teenage career, Frankie tossed the package out the bathroom window. “Stay away from this shit.”
“What the fuck, Frankie?” Zari stood up on the radiator to look out the window. “Are you fucking insane?”
“Why are you still dealing? You’re two years from graduating! I told you to stop and you don’t stop and you go on and go on and you take and you take and you said you wouldn’t you said you wouldn’t do them, Z.”
“You do them!” Zari hopped off the radiator and pointed their finger at their best friend. “You do them. Why is that okay? Because you have all these feelings and are too fucked to get them out?”
“Wow.” Frankie shook their head. “Look at me. You want to end up like me? Is that it? You have EVERYTHING! And adoring father, grandparents that worship the ground you walk on! The band and you’re really trying to justify your actions!?” Frankie took a few deep breaths, feeling their heart beating out of control.
“So I can’t have problems?” Zari rolled their eyes. “What I do is my business.”
“You’re going to end up in a ditch or in prison, Zari.”
“Rich coming from you.” They clicked their tongue.
“I’m not selling drugs! In public spaces! Are you insane, right now?” Frankie turned to face Zari. “I could have take all of those but I don’t want them around you. And I don’t want you selling anymore so I bought your supply for the month. If Trevor asks, I went back on campus. I don’t like who I am around you, Zari. Just fucking graduate, okay?”
Franke wanted to get clean. That’s all they dream about. That’s all they look forward to. Every day they wake up without a craving, they just wish another day comes that is just like that. “see you around, kid.” They walked out to look for their boyfriend who had one of the guitarists on his lap. “Beautiful.”
Frankie didn’t like who they were around any of these people. “God, I hate everyone.” They reached into their Altoids box and opened it, popping two pills before walking back to campus alone. They hated who they were. Every day Frankie wished they’d spin off the edge of the world already.
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Soooo, I need to vent about my bum ass school, but idk how to make posts that go under the cut since I’m on mobile so this is your warning to scroll past as fast as you can
TRIGGER WARNING: SHOOTING AND BOMB THREATS, GENERAL BIGOTRY (RACISM HOMOPHOBIA ETC) BULLYING, COPS, MENTIONS OF A MENTAL HOSPITAL AND SUICIDE PLAN.
For those who don’t know (honestly s lot of you might not know since I try to be private about personal life details), I live in Texas. Yes I know, the horror of it is shocking. But you might already know that while living in America is already kind of a red flag, living in Texas and being in the Texan school system is a HUGE red flag. The bigotry is real here, and the straight girls who think they’re influencers because they do tik tok dances are everywhere. I hate a good majority of the students there, but it gets worse then just annoying b!tches.
So sometime in the winter (I think) the school got a shooter threat. And while they did begin a investigation, you know what they told the students?
If you think they warned us and the parents that someone posted a picture of their silhouette holding a gun and said that students at our school had to be careful and might have to stay home, then CONGRAAAATULATIONS!
YOU’RE ABOUT TO BE PUT ON A F*CKING T-SHIRT.
They didn’t even tell most of the teachers about the threat, students had to find out themselves through Snapchat and other social media platforms. I only found out about the threat through one of my teachers (I’m guessing she was informed because she was the head of the English department). And this wasn’t even the first time we got a dangerous prank threat, because on April Fools we got a bomb threat. Yes it was April Fools, but that was a f*cking BOMBA threat, and I didn’t even learn about the threat until the end of the month.
It ended up being a prank and I think the kid got arrested, but I want you to think for a minute; What if these threats were real? Students would have died because the school refused to inform us. Do you realize how terrifying that is to us, the students? We could have fucking died, without saying our goodbyes to our loved ones, without accomplishing anything, because the school refused to inform us. Our futures were nearly stolen from us because of the fucking school board, I would have NEVER gotten this far with my blog if those threats were real.
And to make it better, the cops we have at the school didn’t do sh!t :). I didn’t see them that whole day.
But that’s not all the evidence the school doesn’t value the students safety. Wait until you hear about this sh!t
So I’m openly gay, and have a hard time understanding tone so when I hear someone joking in a bigoted way, I stand up to them and call them out on their sh!t because 1, they usually joke about gay stuff that isn’t their place to joke about, and again, I don’t know if they’re being serious or not. I heard a guy call someone a faggot right in front of me, and he got a earful from me and the teacher, and there was another guy who said if he had a daughter who was a lesbian he’d allow it, but if his son was gay he’d kill him.
But the worse part that happened in this class was back in winter, and it ducking traumatized me :)))).
The teacher was gone and we had a sub, and because I finished my work I was just on my phone scrolling through tumblr because I have no life, and some girl who arrived the day before starts trying to grab my attention. I look up and she dead ass asked me, who had gay pins on and a rainbow bandana, if I was a faggot. Repeatedly.
I knew I couldn’t fight her, and insults wouldn’t solve anything, so I went with the route I usually went with and tried to make her look stupid because of how problematic she was being and threw in a few sassy comebacks as well. Everyone began laughing and watching which did wonders for my anxiety since I’m already being attacked, and the girl played innocent saying “I’m just asking it’s no big deal”
In the heat of the moment because not only was I scared and wanted her to back off, I was also angry, I said “I should rip your hair out.” And then she started yelling at me, saying she’d snatch my bandana and other threats while everyone was laughing. The sub broke us apart and she went back to her friend group, while I went back to my phone.
You wanna know what she did next?
She called over to me and asked if I was going to kill myself after that :).
Here’s the thing. I went to a mental hospital for a suicide plan. And I was also open about that because that place helped me and I didn’t think it was something to hide. The people there were great, and I got the medical help I didn’t know I needed. The students knew that, told her, and she basically handed me a loaded gun with that statement.
The sub once again broke us apart and I reported the girl, but it wasn’t until months later (with even more bullying from those kids in my class) that I found out her punishment. She got a week of in school suspension, and while I understand the school can’t tell me her punishment I couldn’t make peace with it because I didn’t know if she was actually punished or not. I talked about it with my family, and my dad said I didn’t properly stand up for myself because I didn’t physically fight her. My aunts were furious at that and said that the girl could have killed me for fighting her, and that made me realize the true horror of the situation.
Being in that class made me want to die, the only reason I hung on for so long was because my teacher said I had a good mindset and views on the world that she believed the students needed, and didn’t want me to leave. She did let me transfer classes thank god, but still.
Oh and the bigotry gets WORSE.
So a majority of the school population are people of color, including the staff. But the white boys have no shame in being openly racist and bigoted. In my old class a dude DEADASS was writing a essay on why gay people were pedophiles, and I overheard him saying that being a house wife wasn’t hard and he didn’t understand why women did want that, AND he would talk about supporting communism in my friend’s class. But it gets better because I knew him from my middle school theatre class, and in his mini plays he’d always have the black kid in his group die. It got so bad he was literally kicked out. But guess what? He never got expelled for this sh!t. They just let him go on and on about these horrid believes that is openly harming minorities, and what makes me angrier is all the African American friends he has.
According to one of my friends (who is black btw), that did has become the “token white guy” of their group, which is why they let him do all this shit.
With all these people walking freely around the school, and all the stupid staff in charge of the place, I don’t feel safe there. I genuinely believe that the school wants students to die because of how little they care about us. From letting the bullying continue, having useless cops that don’t even try to break apart fights, to not informing us where there’s a threat that could kill dozens of students, I genuinely believe they want us to die. I genuinely believe they don’t care about us, and I don’t know how I can stand two more years of that school.
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