#which I've been meaning to do for months

[deepwoundsandfadedscars]

.

#staying in a hotel with my grandma tonight cause shes gotta be at the airport for 5 AM #and its over an hour drive to home and we were going to be in the city today already #and so we had a lot of time to kill here in the hotel and i cant even remember how we got on the topic #but ultimately i wound up coming out to grandma tonight #which I've been meaning to do for months #i was kicking myself for not doing it before grandpa passed #but she agreed that he would've loved me either way and probably had some suspicion anyways lol #kee speaks #in other news I had probably the cheapest day at the stampede without even meaning to #i paid $25 for parking (OUCH) but entry to the park was free until 2 #which we were well before so I didn't pay to be there (makes me feel a touch better about parking) #and then grandma bought me lunch #and mom bought me a lemonade #i bought myself a mug and a magnet and that was the only transaction i did on site #and then supper was a business expense and the hotel is paid for by moms points #this is quite possibly the cheapest trip I've ever had to the city in a long time #which is good because I didn't budget anything for it and have no spare finances right now lol #and I don't get paid till the end of the week #i didn't even know there were times to get into the stampede where it's free #so that was exciting

[kyouka-supremacy]

I think we should just bring back Wungo Wednesday and start a fandom collective anime rewatch

#Because otherwise I can feel I won't last much longer #Because like. The last two hyperfixations of mine ended the moment I started feeling like there wasn't any new content #And two days ago in one day I started a new manga a new book and rewatching a favourite show #Whereas I hadn't started anything new in the two years ever since I got into bsd. Which makes it NOT a good sign #But the bsd anime has now ended for one month and 25 days and that's the last time the plot actually moved forward. #And if I counted right. The manga took 4 chapters (that is chapters 110-111) to adapt 6 minutes #That means it's going to take another 12 months (18 minutes left to adapt. that's 12 more chapters) to catch up with the anime #Yeah I'm not. sticking around this long with nothing new to see I'm sorry #Best case scenario I take a one year hiatus but that doesn't make it sound likely that I'll be back #And I know it's fresh news as early as this morning that author said they were introducing a new character but like. #They also said they finished writing this arc like. One year and half ago if I remember correctly? #And we still have yet to see the end of i t so... #That is to say. I'll probably be starting an anime rewatch starting next Wednesday. I've been meaning to do it for a while anyway #I don't want to leave the fandom I like the one chapter a month format #On the positive news I still have a queue of original posts that spans over ten months #And I was meaning to start the reblogs queue too in these days. So there's that #random rambles

[riverwithoutbanks]

(click for better quality)

Dean Winchester is saved.

Other versions under the cut.

#this has been a ride #finally done! #tell me which one you like best #i'll reblog this post with the translation of the enochian text as soon as i can #I think I forgot to take it with me when I moved #Yes. I've been working on this for like 6 months. What do you mean time management? #spn #spn fanart #castiel #castiel fanart #art nouveau inspired #destiel #destiel fanart #dean winchester #supernatural #supernatural fanart #my fanart #btw tell me if you'd like to be tagged in the future

[pleasantmsp]

I love Beauyasha so much. I miss them so much.

The reunion gave me so much joy and now I'm in this weird happy but melancholy state. I love the Nein so much and I want more of them. And I especially want more of Beau and Yasha. If we get a Fjorester wedding one shot, I will be stoked. But then also give me the Beauyasha wedding too!

I'm really just hoping they keep doing these little reunions cause I love the Mighty Nein so much and seeing them makes me so happy.

#critical role #cr spoilers #beauyasha #the mighty nein #echoes of the solstice #and the rest of the tags are a rant #got a bit carried away lol #my depression has been real bad for the past like 9 months and i dont have the money or resources to go to therapy #so i am in a real interesting head space lately #this one shot gave me so much joy #i haven't felt that engaged and excited and happy in a long time #but now that its over that feeling is being joined by (like i said) this weird melancholy that i've never felt in this way before #tm9 mean so much to me #beauyasha means so much to me #especially in these times with the strikes and all the cancelations of wlw inclusive media #i've been trying to get back into c3 but getting through those first arcs is proving difficult #bh just doesn't feel the same as the m9 to me which is fine but sad in a way #cause I feel like there's still so much the nein could do and participate in #i definitely understood what ashley meant when she said she didn't feel like she was done with yasha #i feel the same #so i hope they keep doing these one shots and i hope they release some news on the animated show soon #and here's hoping that as I catch up on bh i can come to love them even half as much as tm9 #cause that'd be enough to keep me coming back and then some

[icy-book]

Consider, if you will, AU (either with canon post-s1 pre-s2 events but D.A.D.D.I.E.S. solves things before season 2 would start, or no Doodler/betrayal but Nicky still has to leave because FBI or other reasons) in which Terry Jr is the full time drama teacher for Teen High. Nicky returns from wherever he's been and is like "Well I want to be an active part of my kid's life and try and make up for lost time. I should go to his parents' evening, find out how he's doing in school, and meet his teachers. Especially this Mr Marlowe guy, Taylor seems to think he's awesome." And walking right into that classroom/hall to find his ex-boyfriend best friend sitting there in a dorky sweater and tie combo

Cue Terry, without missing a beat, greeting them as if nothing is wrong

Internal: when the FUCK did he come back and oh my god this is so awkward fuck I have to be professional how do I tell this guy that his kid is a loveable little shit after everything that's happened oh god oh fuck

Externally: "Hello Taylor and Mr Close-Foster-Freeman. I'm Taylor's drama teacher" *shakes hand* "Would you like to take a seat?"

#Nicky: I should go to Taylor's parents evening #Cassandra knowing full well that Terry is the drama teacher: you know what that sounds like a great idea #Both Terry Jr and Nicky afterwards sent her the So was anyone going to tell me blank meme #Nicky spending that night freaking out to Cass like #Did he get hotter??? I swear he got hotter in the 13 years I've been away #It's not fair Cass his eyes are even pretty in the school's shitty lights that they don't have the budget to fix #He looks so good in a tie Cassie. WHY DOES HE LOOK SO GOOD IN A TIE #Also when the fuck did he get married #WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE HAS A DAUGHTER #....Cass he would be so good with kids I think I'm going to die #(Nicky was wrong as Terry is so bad with teenagers) #Cassandra completely unimpressed just trying to do her woodwork #But also very indulgent towards her ex-husband's tomfoolery #Nicky: do you think his wife is okay with poly relationships #Cassandra: a) I'm pretty sure Terry would require a minimum of 6 months joint and individual therapy for both of you #Before you can start dating again #And b) if she is let me know because Veronica is a Snacc #I have many thoughts about this if you can't tell #Which I may expand on it requested #terry jr #dungeons and daddies #terry stampler #dndads #terry jr stampler #dndads s2 #dndads terry jr #nicholas foster #nick close #nicky freeman #nicky close foster

[unorcadox]

i love making text-heavy stuff tbh. i think i've realistically "outgrown" weirdcore at least with regard to the more heavily edited stuff, but i still deeply love the idea of making my writing pieces look like they're fucked up pieces of old web lost media, so i think i've found a way to keep going despite that

#not edits #this is not a disparaging statement to any editor or concept btw i just am at a point in my life where i wanna make stuff that has #more textual meaning and less visual surrealism. call it traumacore or whatever but that's where i'm at with it lol #i've been kinda doing poorly mentally these last few months and i honestly consider it a blessing for this blog cuz like #even tho the growth on here has slowed to a fucking snail's pace. i feel like i make the most Potent stuff in this state #my sillier and more heavily edited works generally just frustrate me ngl. feels like i'm phoning it in a lot of the time #all of this is to say that the textcore is here to stay basically. at least for now #i've edited like 15+ edits in a single sitting tonight which is like. unprecedented for me nowadays so yippee

[hangingslothcentral]

getting that 'new project' longing right about now

#i have a few things that are quietly ticking away in the background #one of them is Twelvelms but i've ultimately decided i CANNOT run that alone #which means i need to change a lot of the planning and the budget #but it's just got to a point where i feel this immense sense of panic and overwhelm whenever i try to work on it #which SUCKS because i love that world and that story #i'll talk a bit more about that in a few months time when i have a more solid idea of next steps #it's just been really really hard lads #partly bc of having top surgery in the middle of its pre-production process #but also just because it's absolutely huge in scope #i love it so much #but i'm going to have to make some changes to my approach or i'll just completely burn out #i do not want to do that #so yeah #other things coming #IN ADDITION to #not instead of #existing stuff in the works

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

gratitude list time I'll go first

#stopped caring about some things I was caring far too much about #it's another rainy dreary day which means I can wear cozy clothes and curl up with my brother's dog and coffee and a book #little guy and I are just chillin. he's tiny and shorthaired so he gets cold easily and likes to cuddle up #and seeing as I'm the only person home rn... doggo cuddle time it is!!! #I've been reading more lately!! I'm having trouble with tbosas so I got out a couple other things (sea of tranquility included) #that I've really enjoyed. I'm reading turtles all the way down right now and oh boy I forgot how nice a little contemporary #coming of age novel can be at times. also forgot that john green is a genuinely good writer. as in I personally enjoy his style. #let's see... my favorite sound guy for church is home from college for the summer which means THERES SOMEONE HERE #WHO ACTUALLY KNOWS HOW THE SOUND SYSTEM WORKS. me and the other sound guys have been barely #managing the last couple months bc there's been a ton of random technical glitches (the system is pretty old tbh) #so HALLELUJAH THE PERSON WHO ACTUALLY KNOWS WHAT TO DO IS BACK!!!! #I've been branching out into a bunch of things I wouldn't have thought to enjoy lately bc of the time I've been spending #with my sister in law. music and tv shows and even foods and stuff!!! #Gurt is coming to visit me in a week and a day!!!!!! I'm SO EXCITED #and last but certainly not least I gave myself bangs again and honestly I'm so happy about it.

[the-valiant-valkyrie]

me and my whimsical coworker who keeps daydreaming about me being hypnotized and at the complete mercy of anyone who requests anything of me like the good little drones he's so obsessed with

#ieytd #commander solaris #hivemind #i picked up a pen (art) #i've been thinking abt this a lot recently and by a lot i mean last night #well that's kind of a lie. i've been thinking abt solaris being hypnotized in some fashion for like a month straight #but hivemind only became relevant last night #to me he's like a verbal pyro. do you feel me on that. the world is so whimsical through his perspective. #he doesn't think he hates solaris (which he does) he just thinks that he could make her better. if she was under his technological spell #i think the thought of him trying to use positive reinforcement training on solaris to be utterly hilarious #good job solaris you did your tasks! doesn't obedience feel sooo good solaris? 😊?? yaaaay! you should have no autonomy now okay??

[crossbackpoke-check]

Why I Am Not Coming In To Work Today [abridged], Jess Zimmerman

part one | part two

#toronto maple leafs #HELLO EVERYBODY THIS HAS BEEN MONTHS!!! MONTHS IN THE MAKING BECAUSE i AM UNHINGED AND NEEDED THE PRECISE PICTURES THAT I KNEW I WOULD GET #like. seventy five percent of this has been done since the first time i posted this and while it has gotten better with time because #my narratives simply got more complex and there's so much of this that is For Me but don't worry i will explain but aLSO goddamn mitch coul #you have gotten married any later in the year. also willy you truly disappointed me by not getting an absurd haircut this year (now that #i've said this he's going to debut it on instagram like. tomorrow. but anyway that meant y'all got to enjoy my neuroses of #Loving Tyler Bertuzzi who is a goddamn leaf. the joys of having to wait to post this (was not a leaf at the time i started it) and anyway i #have at length i think had the breakdown about tyler in pigtails girl dad & how i got a bob & then tyler copied me which was rude. that's m #gender. ANYWAY starting from the top we got sheldon keefe documentation which was really just the personal decision that i wanted all the #coaching staff to be the markers in the poem/the bold & also at the TIME keefe hadn't re-signed &we thought it might be everybody out w/kyl #anyway the title of the scrap of an old lover's flannel is literally 'u think this is about sheldon & kyle NO it's about timothy liljegren' #bc. liljegren was on the marlies winning cup team & has had a contentious relationship w/keefe ever since & was healthy scratched in playof #& the narrative is sooooo. also at one point for the ryan o'reilly i was going to edit the stlb out of his grandma's shirt or cover it w/th #childhood dreams line but THEN i found the gio snapped stick one which was too perfect for 'crumbling copy' the ryan o'reilly To Me is so. #ur insane in ways u did not think for that one. like. how soft her hands were. his grandma you guys. he grew up a leafs fan. if he ever get #to lift the cup with her again i will lose my shit. the cup run a movie i remember nothing--OKAY the spezz one i knew i needed him stresse #but also i believe in the spezz/kyle narrative so. it comes up later don't worry ALSO SPEZZ FOLLOWING HIM TO PITT CAME AFTER I MADE THIS bu #the muzz tea one makes me a little sensy bc muzz was out with an injury for most of this season & it was a really scary spinal one & so yea #& then the simmer one just straight up makes me cry bc i love him so much & the work that he does for anti-racism in hockey means so much & #if you have that video open & watch it i promise you will cry i do every time it's so beautiful he had to be on comforted by beauty & sammy #boy is on the a man who doesn't know me because EYE remember the caps goalie tandems. baby lilya. the mo one is a little funny bc it is #solely due to wade's thread about mo rielly the coal miner homestead husband. that's why he moves to omaha also i think it suits him (quiet #OK NOW OLD MEN IN LOVE NARRATIVE this one's in contention for my fave bc it's spezz coping w/retirement fundamental meaningless of existenc #u heard abt tyler already that's for me the minchy picture was just too good i had found it earlier & i spent SO LONG looking for an empty #leafs rink picture for bathtub i have some cool construction photos but i wanted the melting ice ones (thought about tahoe lol) & the sprin #one i manip'd a lot bc i needed a spring picture bc playoffs clinch in spring & that one fit so coincidentally perfect bc it's 7 straight #seasons 7 guys so. :) & i KNEW i swore to god they did more milk advertising i knew i was gonna do this one from the minute i saw the poem #the milk patch & it took a hot minute BUT I FOUND THIS ONE this one's for funsies. AND THE PIC I WAITED SO FUCKING LONG FOR this is actuall #from kerf's wedding but i was like i know on god mitch is getting married this summer & that's about to be the drunkest shenanigans wedding #i'm waiting for the pics. & then i was BLESSED with this one which is beautiful & perfect & LOOK AT THEM. anyway the last one is bc

[queen0fm0nsterz]

Reading my fave thin man and lady fic. Kicking my feet a lot because tbh. Sometimes a sad man really is just a weird woman's science project in a way that is so homoerotic

#carols.txt #when i tell you i've been re-reading this single one shot religiously every single month for almost three years I mean it #《straight》 ship so good we call it queerbaiting #LMAOOOOOO #call it yaoyuri the way these old people r tragic and doomed by the narrative or whatever #listen as a bi person on the aroace spectrum whatever this fic was trying to convey really strikes a cord #while its not the same as my own this characterization of them is so intriguing. im so hooked on it #^^ one thing i think this person really nailed was thin man's immaturity (stemming from his emotions oftentime being too big to control) -> #and the desire of attention that comes with said immaturity while also having the lady be both cold (normal) and intrigued in a way that -> #that really fits her character. curiosity is one of the many facets that make up her character that don't get explored much and i think its #done so well here for like no reason💀 THIS AUTHOR COOKED TOO HARD YOU GUYS #like ofc she wouldnt send him away. shes studying him under a microscope. even though hes annoying as hell #thin man is plagued by sassy man syndrome in this which is really fucking funny cus it lasts a total of 3 seconds before she finds him out #PLUS THE TALK ABOUT THE TOWER AND THE WORLD... AUGHHH #i need this author to give me their brain NOW #AUGHHHHHAAGGGHEEHH #everyone needs to start doing thinlady the way this person was doing it #this is the biblically accurate old people (in case my theory abt baby lady having been in the pale city is wrong) #live laugh love. its my birthday. spoiling myself a bit. goddamn.

[dykeinthedark]

venting in tags about gender n shit (long as hell) (u can comment and talk 2 me as always :3)

#okay so i got a really masc haircut about a month ago and i know it's just a haircut but holy shit has it changed EVERYTHING for me #like.... i've always leaned masc except 1) before i came out 2) when i was actively in love with someone who i knew liked femmes #and they always described me as a fem. because that's what i showed her. because i wanted to be with her. #but lowkey whenever i'm in a not-impressing-anyone raw-dogging-life-no-crush era i always resort to a very masc style #like masc being my default and i'd only lean fem to impress people whether it's for love or peer pressure in a specific setting #like ''dressing up'' has always been a form of drag to me. like something i HAD to do to fit in or impress my parents (scott favor core) #but ever since this haircut i've realized... i could just BE masc innately like i really don't have to be womanly if i don't want to #which i usually don't. again i have only ever dressed fem for other people. but it's not even being masc that attracts me on its own #it's like. being masc in a distinctly lesbian way. as in whenever i look in the mirror i don't wanna be like a Guy i wanna be a dyke. #like lesbian as a gender identity too sort of thing honestly. okay i've been waffling but basically i sort of want to call myself butch #but i don't know if i like... can?? if i'm allowed to??? #everyone always says it's MORE than just wearing boy clothes and not wearing makeup and having short hair (which i already do all those) #i mean i've always id'd as genderqueer because it literally just means gender weird and i experience gender in a queer way #what's probably the most telling is that my friends (all queer) CALL me a butch lesbian #like every time they do i feel really internally validated. it's not just my clothes but my personality too ig is what people tell me #i have a higher pitched voice relatively speaking but apparently the way i talk is quote ''very clockably into women'' #which?? gender euphoria asf. my best friend specifically he (gay trans guy) always uses butch to describe me very intuitively #people have also noticed that i ''transitioned'' in all aspects except hormonally. like ppl have commented and noticed my masculinzation #but at the same time i always feel rly haunted by my ex relationships because one wanted me to be more masc #(she's the one who came out as straight and would treat me like a man) which i didn't like and i didn't like playing up being fem either #bc now it feels like she (butch) won't believe me if i called myself butch too bc she remembers me being femme #idk i feel like there's her voice in my head all the time that sees everything i do through her eyes (i'm lowkey still in love) #i feel like even though this comes so naturally to me i must be putting on a performance #even though i've actually read stone butch blues and done research into the history and i truly love and id with the culture like i rly do #that im still just a sad imitation of a butch lesbian and can never really be a part of it because i used to enjoy dressing up sometimes #like it's so stupid but can i still be butch if i wore a dress to prom and i think i looked good in it?? #even though i was envious of my friends who wore suits?? that i used to try goth makeup?? that i liked long dresses?? #that i enjoyed stacked necklaces and rings on every finger??? #and tbh ALL OF THAT CAME FROM A CONCIOUS EFFORT TO FEMINIZE MYSELF IN JUNIOR YEAR OF HIGHSCHOOL WHEN I WAS 16 #because omfg it was 2 months before junior prom and i was worried that i was too masc and wanted to get comfortable with being fem

[defeateddetectives]

TOGETHER AT LONG LAST

#LITERAL MATCHING SET THAT MS. MIDORIKAWA CREATED FOR ME PERSONALLY; DO NOT SEPARATE EVER AGAIN!!!!!!! #apologies to the people who have had to hear me whine and cry nonstop about the ends of the earth i've had to go to procure vol 25 #over the past few months but here we finally areee #a colleague on this most recent nyc work trip: so i finally found this very exclusive designer handbag i couldnt find anywhere else #i've been looking for it for ages gosh i'm so glad!!! #me laughing nervously internally: yeah that makes total sense i too......can totally relate #if you happen to be one of the salespeople from the 10+ book/mangastores i sobbed to in the process hi hello #also psa many volumes are out of print bc of low demand apparently which means we gotta band together and hoard some natsumes!!! #natsume problems #(literal) #horrible exorcists

[raiiny-bay]

some things i never finished

#hi. again. #i'm gonna try very hard not to disappear again but. idk. #it's been kind of a busy month & i've had like. zero motivation to be on my computer let alone make literally anything #sooo yea. idk man #as much as i want to make some big elaborate edits for kel's birthday & the boys' anniversary idk if it's gonna happen #i mean. i will make them but i doubt they'll be done on time #it kinda sucks bc i really wanna be here & like make stuff bc it's my favorite hobby but #yea idk #um i did recently go to the coast though which was fun. found lots of cool rocks. & i do mean lots #no idea where i'm going to put them bc my shelves are already covered in rocks but #i will figure it out #n e way. gonna try to catch up on some posts & maybe like. make. something. lol #rainyrambles

[saminthea]

Is it appendicitis or just fibromyalgia and a stomach bug? Guess we'll see in the morning!

#fuck #nothing like a gradual increase in acute abdomen pain over the course of the week #along with diarrhea and nausea and lack of appetite #tmi #probably #my mom's giving me a ride to the ER in the morning #still have a couple irl friends as mutuals here #not right now because I've yet to throw up and I don’t think I have a fever #probably just not going to sleep so I can be sure I'll be awake when it's time to go #spend the rest of the night by the toilet in case I throw up #she's a nurse so she had me do the test where you put pressure on the pain and then release #at first it didn’t feel any worse #and then #it felt A LOT worse #vent #sorry #I've never had surgery before #and as previously mentioned I have fibro #which is probably going to mean a longer recovery time #did you know fibro can get worse when you have other infections in your body? #I'm currently having the worst flare up I've had in months #and it came out of nowhere #god Im not ready to potentially need surgery #I'm hosting a gala in 2 weeks! #a gala that has been in the works for months! #there might be as many as 40 people there #at least I have MaineCare #so I don’t have to worry about my insurance deciding not to cover it #very deliberatly posting this here and not Facebook #just so I don’t needlessly worry friends and family

[daisywords]

the good news: finally started* my new bookbinding project (making a sketchbook for a birthday present for my brother—I think I'm going to do some variant of a sewn boards binding if I can find some kind of card with the right weight. thinking of doing some kind of loz design or at least a sword on the cover? also I found the scraps of gold leaf I scavenged from the trash this has so much potential)

the bad news: it's 1 am and the high of starting something is making me. not tired

*folded the signatures and that's all

#adventures in bookbinding #watched the new Jacob Geller video while I did it too which doesn't help those always make my brain run at full capacity #I saw a really cool looking book a few months ago that was just made with aluminum foil and textured underneath to look embossed kinda #and I've been wanting to try that #but then I found my black book cloth and I'm like ooh what if it was black except for a silver foil cutout #but now I could throw some gold on there too #I can be as experimental as I want bc if it looks tooo perfect it will be too intimidating for a sketchbook #so I'm fully expecting to mess up a little bit meaning I can be ambitious #the other option is to do a coptic binding but idk if I have enough of that kind of thread #luckily I had a ton of extra paper cut bc I miscalculated for the last book I did in the lab #I was just going to use paper from my big sketchpad but lucky me I didn't had to cut anything by hand this time around #also I am a genius and am currently pressing the signatures under a hefty stack of all of the yearbooks belonging to my other brother