#why does Imogen’s last name not pop up in tags

[bardicgunslinger]

So please confirm for me that there are people who don’t feel the need to immediately start shipping characters that have only known each other a couple of days.

I understand crack!shipping and all but you aren’t being serious right?

Then again… sometimes you can’t help it, I suppose.

#critical role #critical role campaign 3 #dorian storm #laudna #fresh cut grass #f.c.g. #ashton greymoore #orym of the air ashari #critical role imogen #fearne calloway #why does Imogen’s last name not pop up in tags?

[normal-thoughts-official]

Aftermath

The MC survives Richard Sutcliffe's attempted murder.

This is what happens after.

Fandom: It Lives (Visual Novels)

Relationships: Main Character & Tom Sato & Imogen Wescott & Danni Asturias, Elliot Vance & Main Character (It Lives Beneath), Danni Asturias/Imogen Wescott, Robbie Sutcliffe/Elliot Vance (mentioned), Richard Sutcliffe & Dying

Additional Tags: Crack, Humor, Canon Compliant, Mentions of Sex, that's basically it honestly this is just crack, also yes my character is named That Bitch that is his name, i do not have the maturity to pick my character's names and be normal about it, and since this is a crackfic i thought it was fitting to keep the name i had originally picked, anyway. enjoy, no beta we die like men, honestly the whole thing with robert trying to murder the MC was so crazy, im just like, theres no way to react to this that isnt crazy

Read it on Ao3

When Robbie and Elliot get back home from their date, the first thing they see is That Bitch making fishsticks, as expected. However, the kitchen is half-destroyed and That Bitch is drenched head to toe in lake water, which is considerably less expected. Richard Sutcliffe's corpse, which had apparently spawned into their kitchen for the purposes of quick visual storytelling, was also there.

"Uh… Watcha got there, That Bitch?" Elliot asks, frozen in place.

"Fishsticks," That Bitch replies, showing him the frying pan. "They'll be ready in a minute."

Robbie stares at the body, frozen in shock. "Is that my dad?" he asks.

"Hah, more like your dead," That Bitch replies, then does a double take. "No, wait, shit. I'm sorry, Robbie. I don't know why I brought his body here. Seemed like a good idea at the time. In my defense, I didn't know you'd be joining us."

"Robbie, uh, really likes fishsticks," Elliot says, face red.

"Yeah, no, I was stupid for thinking you'd spend time apart willingly, it's on me," That Bitch replies. "Anyway, Robbie, I'm, uh, sorry."

Robbie swallows. "Did you go looking for my dad's corpse in the lake, or…?"

"What? Oh, uh, no. No offense, but I kinda had other worries in my mind."

"Right, that's what I thought."

They stare at each other.

"Sooo… Fun conversation starters for the night... Why is my dad's corpse here?"

"Right. That's because I, uh, killed him. But in my defense, he started it."

"That sounds about right," Robbie nods. "What did he do?"

"Oh, you know. Showed up while I was cooking, struck me with tranquilizers, then shoved me into a coffin and threw me in the lake. The usual."

"I thought he was dead," Elliot says, dumbfounded.

"He is now! Better late than never. No, wait. Sorry, Robbie."

"It's okay," Robbie shrugs.

"Man, grandma kinda sucks at this whole murder thing. So many NPCs showed up in the story just to die, and she couldn't even take care of Robert? I thought her vendetta was specifically against the cultists anyway," Elliot says.

"Yeah, I remember I saw her running after Robert during the whole townpocalypse, she had a marlinspike and everything. I guess he just, like, survived being stabbed by a ghost."

"Wow, lame. No, wait. Sorry, Robbie."

Robbie shrugs. "It's okay. I mean, I already assumed he was dead, so it's not, like, news or anything. Also, yeah, your grandma kinda let you down on that one."

Elliot and That Bitch look at each other for a second. "Right. You kids should go into the living room do something appropriate for your age yet couple-y. I will get his body somewhere more hygienic, and then we can, like, properly talk about this."

"Sure, sounds like a plan," Elliot says, already grabbing Robbie's hand.

As if on cue, grandpa shows up. "Hey, kids. Sorry I'm late, I lost track of time. Hope you didn't do anything fishy. Heh. Oh my god, what is that?"

"Fishsticks," all three of them reply at once.

-----

The kids go into the living room, and That Bitch and Arthur debate what to do with the body.

"Maybe we should take it to the police?"

"Right, because cops are totally trustworthy to deal with something like this, particularly in this town," That Bitch replies.

"Touché. Why didn't you just dump him into the lake? People would just assume that he died during the flood like everybody else."

"His face is smashed in by what is clearly a hammer," That Bitch replies.

"And? Cops are stupid, they wouldn't question it."

"Holy fuck, you're so right. Damn."

----

They hand the body over to the body-fishing efforts, who predictably didn't ask anything about it. As a quick goodbye, Robbie said, "rest in piss, dad," before handing over the body. It was really emotional. Elliot put his hand over Robbie's shoulder solemnly and everything.

When they're leaving, they run into Tom, who was also volunteering to help with the efforts before he had to go back to college, because apparently at no point will he ever think he's done enough for strangers he's never met in his life. "Hey, guys, what's up?", he asks.

"Hey Tom. Richard tried to kill me."

"Oh my God, did you die? No, wait. I meant, are you okay?"

That Bitch shrugs. "You should see the other guy."

"Last time one of us said that, the other guy was completely unscathed."

"Last time one of us said that, it was you."

"Unprovoked???"

"Please stop referencing the Karl Marx K-pop Stan Fight every time we talk," That Bitch sighs.

"It fuels me."

"Right. Anyway, do you know where Imogen and Danni are? I kinda figured I should tell the details to you guys in person, and all. Feels weird to announce my almost-murder via text. WikiHow had no tips on how to do that."

"Oh, I know exactly where Danni and Imogen are," Tom says. "I've seen things, That Bitch."

"Good for them, good for them."

"Yeah. We should stop by Danni's place in like, three hours or something, and see if we can give them the details. Speaking of which, why is your grandma so bad at murdering the right people?"

"This is actually the one thing I don't have an answer to."

"Hey, cut Josie some slack," grandpa says.

"She tried to kill you," Tom points out.

"Yeah, but like, mood, you know?", he replies, shrugging.

"Solid point."

----

They get to Danni's house three hours later, as agreed, and knock on the door lightly to let them know they are there, and still See Things.

"Oh my god, Tom, again???," Danni screams, throwing an embarrassing capybara plushie at him.

"I should be the one saying that!! How are you back at it already??"

"'Back'?" Danni asks, frowning.

"He thinks we stopped at some point, babe," Imogen explains, with the patience of someone talking to a toddler.

"Oh, like, for snacks?"

"No, because we'd be tired or something. Like, for a few hours."

"Damn, lame. What do you think we are, 70?"

"I think you are very naked and making no move to fix that," That Bitch intervenes.

"Oh, right! Sorry, sorry," Imogen says, startling to hustle to find her clothes in the middle of the mess of the living room.

"You come into my house, you make Imogen put clothes on," Danni grumbles, pretending that she's looking for her bra, which is right in front of her and also bright yellow.

"Sorry, it's kind of an emergency. Richard, uh, tried to kill me."

"Yeah, but did you die?"

"Danni!," Imogen says, clearly going for a scolding tone, which is completely undermined by the way she's giggling at her antics.

"What? He looks fine to me. I'm sure Richard can wait a few more hours before we start looking for him again, or whatever."

"A few more hours?" Tom asks, shocked.

"Actually, I killed Richard already," That Bitch replies.

"Well, what the fuck are you doing here then? The case is closed. We'll see you tomorrow!" Danni says, shushing them out of the room.

"Tomorrow?" Tom squeaks.

----

Tom and That Bitch stare at each other as the door locks behind them. "I need more stamina," Tom says, pouting.

"Personally, I just broke a coffin while underwater, so I think I'm good."

"Damn bro, that's crazy."

"Well, you know how Fridays are."

"True. Did you guys have your fishsticks, at least?"

"Yeah."

"Cool. So, should we play videogames, or?"

"Sounds like a plan."

And that's that. Well, at least it was quick.

#it lives #it lives beneath #ilb #imogen wescott #danni asturias #tom sato #elliot vance #robbie sutcliffe #richard sutcliffe #dannimogen #it lives anthology #crack #im rlly on my bullshit huh

[bi-outta-cordonia]

Top 10s

The year is coming to a close and despite this being my first foray into PB fandom for the year, some interesting shit has happened in these books and 2019 was full of all sorts of fun stories. I want to cap off Choices this year by naming my top ten favorite moments in all the books released in 2019.

Tagging all my favorite unfriendly Black hotties: @questionablespecies @imogen-wescott @beyonceswigs @annelyseadair @cassiopeiacorvus @massivelysilentchaos @nikkisha16 @boujeechoices @raleigh-carrera @mand-delemonde

10) BB MC training with Jax: I like. Many things. Many things involve swords. Jax training BB MC in fight skills was awesome as a scene, especially since it came with the moment of him reestablishing his connection with his blade and the two of them touching foreheads as they come to terms with her death. But nothing--nothing--is gonna top the moment where the two of them literally fight each other. They train and they train hard as hell. “What’s this position called?” “It’s called ‘you better not break my defense because I’ll kick your ass’.” And then she cuts part of his shirt. He looks up, they start back with the training, and he slices part of her dress. They keep going until eventually there are no more clothes and they are now on the ground, making out. The exact opposite of training, but I can’t hear over the receptors in my brain that sound off for couple training scenes.

9) “Oh, you like that”: Listen. NB was trash. There’s no denying that. But that first moment when you finally get to dive into Cal, make out with him, when ol girl takes off both of their clothes for the most intense face sucking she’s ever experienced in life? And then he dips his head or bites her neck or whatever the fuck he does--I don’t even remember. Because what I do remember--very vividly--is damn near throwing my phone across the room when he says “Oh, you like that...” I read it in his drawl, felt that shit in my soul, and it will never not make me so incredibly disappointed that we will never get to see him really go buck wild with MC because it was there.

8) Landry bailing if you don’t talk to him: It happened with Vanessa, happened with Becca, happened with Olivia, happened with Sebastian--sometimes. I don’t want to make friends with folks who come at me sideways when it doesn’t immediately benefit them. Landry being a little coward was something all the intelligent folks saw coming but you could see inklings of the narrative trying to set him up for redemption at the eleventh hour. Except. I didn’t want that. A majority of folks did not want that it seems. And PB listened for once and didn’t force us to have to interact with him during the last leg of the first book. If you talk to everyone in the friend group before you get to him, he bails and is not seen or heard from. Good. 

7) MOTY MC making bank off her deadbeat ex husband: MOTY was also another unexpected favorite to come out of 2019 and told the story of a single mother trying to raise her baby right. Guy was and is easily the worst antagonist to ever show up in these books because he is so disgustingly real. Emotionally abusive, manipulative, narcissistic, and cruel--he did everything in his power to exert power over MC. He wanted the kid, not because he wanted to be her father but because he wanted to use her to help boost him, and going through the whole book making sure to pick options that would best demonstrate that MC was providing exactly what the baby needs, only for the judge to say that not only is she not awarding custody to Guy but he also has to pay child support, pro- and retroactively?? When sis opened that bank account and saw tens of thousands sitting in her savings?? I almost cried.

6) ILB MC rising from certain death and avenging her parents: Okay so this might be cheating a little because ILB came out in 2018, but I also said this was a top ten list of shit that happened in 2019, and seeing this bitch break out of a coffin, swim up, and straight murder the man that took her parents from her was insanity. Richard really thought he had her on the ropes, huh? He thought she wasn’t gonna be able to break out and kick his ass? And when she told him that, as far as the entire town was concerned, he was already dead and they were just waiting for his body to wash up? Ooh, she wasn’t stuck on the boat with him--he was trapped on the lake with her.

5) Logan was a forced LI for a good reason??: Girls, Ride or Die: A Bad Boy Romance was an unexpected fave this year but out of all the moments to choose from that absolutely floored me, the fact that Logan was so heavily pushed was because Kaneko asked him to gain your trust so that the crew could use you? That shit hurt so much and had me screaming the entire time I was tapping through the revelation scenes. I mean, we’ve had LIs betray MCs a ton of times but I still could not believe that Logan had so thoroughly did what he did and when they showed you the flashbacks of the very subtle ways he was trying to weed information from MC? In the early stages?? Man.....this is why my MC went with Colt--kidding kidding. She is with Colt but I love Logan deeply solely because of this.

4) BB MC dying: okay NB tried to do something groundbreaking but like it got completely overshadowed by BB MC getting fucking stabbed through her chest because typically your MC will walk away okay from most scenarios but this bitch actually didn’t. Couple that with the fact that I’m romancing Jax so the thing that killed her was his sword, something that has been revealed as being a precious thing and something he’s cherished for a long time as a tool to help him protect the ones he loves? It hit me right in the a ng s t. She pops back up a vampire in the third book, a reveal which comes to us at the end of the second but oh man watching Jax cradle her dying body, knowing he was never going to forgive himself for this happening? It was delicious.

3) ACOR MC turning the crowd on Caesar: okay, stabbing Caesar was fantastic, no one is denying that, but I honestly thought the most impactful and most fucking insane moment of ACOR is when MC made the first attempt, got caught, and was able to stir the crowd during the final leg of her trial to the point that she started a literal riot in Rome. The flavor, the power--can you imagine being Julius Caesar and watching a ho string your folks along and convince them that she couldn’t possibly have been guilty of a crime because her pussy is too good for that? Who is gonna win this fight--a certified conqueror of several realms or one bitch with the world’s most fantabulous coochie? The answer may surprise you...

2) TRR MC is pregnant: we got stuck in yeehaw hell for seven weeks...seven weeks of having to act like Bertrand and Savannah were even that important according to the narrative when MC is a whole ass duchess trying to start her family....all the months of seeing Liam talk so enthusiastically about wanting a family with MC, wanting to be a father, and wanting to build a life with her, after all the bullshit they went through and the hurdles they had to jump in order to even get to the point where they could be happily married? And then she called him out to the field and told him that they were having a baby? I cried. I cried so hard.

1) ACOR MC stabbing Cassius in the fucking back: I loved ACOR so much. So much of the political machinations, the scheming, the dancing around language while trying to manipulate powerful patrons into doing your bidding--I had Antony wrapped around one finger and Cassius on the other--string them both along while trying to achieve my own goals but maaaaaaan....Betraying Cassius at the last second in order to protect yourself from reprimand so you can make a clean getaway from Rome was the peak. The epitome of ACOR MC in a nutshell. I fucking loved how absolutely unhinged and manipulative that bitch could be. She literally sat up there and told him all the things he wanted to hear, acted like she cared about who he wanted for Rome, in some cases straight up lied to him about how much she loved him, and then during the moment that mattered most--when they both stabbed Caesar and thrust Rome into chaos--she shed the visage of the beautiful woman he had so deeply fallen in love with and unveiled the poisonous snake she had always been. She used him. He truly and honestly didn’t see it coming until he peeked outside and happened to spy her standing firm at Antony’s side. And the narrative let me do that with the utmost glee. 

And that’s it. Go forth. Make your own list. Criticize mine, idc. 

#playchoices #choices

[reviewsfromafuturecorpse]

Insidious: The Last Key 2018

Let me start off with saying this is probably my favorite out of the series so far. Though I do love the first, This was a surprisingly good prequel. It starts off with scenes that show you Elise’ backstory. Which features the common father doesn’t accept her gift but her mother does, scenario. Her poor younger brother is just being traumatized his whole life by his sister scaring him with her gifts but who can blame him.

 Her father was played by Josh Stewart, who is always a welcomed sight to see in my eyes. He’s been a chameleon in the acting roles he’s landed so I wasn’t surprised he excelled at this role as well. You don’t get as many scenes with with Elise’ mother because she gets murdered when Elise goes into the further and unlocks the door for Keyface. Yes that’s the actual name for the demon. So we have Keyface and lipstick-face. They’re striving for creativity on these names. Which, side note, are we ever going to go back and see lipstick face other than his split second pop up in every movie? I still have questions about him and clearly he’s of importance if he’s popping up everytime. I know Elise died in the first movie but since these are out of order, let’s go back and revisit this guy. 

Flash forward to modern day, Well 2010, and Elise and the boys get a call for work in Elise’ childhood home. Go figure. Also she lived next to a prison so no wonder that house had so many spirits. At first she says no but to true Elise fashion, she changes her mind like she did with Quinn Brenner. Specs and Tucker are originally told they can’t go but as you can guess, they ended up tagging along. Despite having those small predictable moments, I will say the jump scares were great. I enjoy how Insidious always goes silent before a jumpscare. I prefer that over the music that can make it predictable as to when it’s going to happen. They did a great job in this film with making the scares happen in parts you aren’t expecting. 

 Back to Elise’s house and the boys get her set up for the night and the man living in the house, known as Ted Garza, shows her her childhood bedroom and says that’s where the ghost is. Note that this guy still had Elise’s family decor throughout the old house. That’s a bit gross but whatever his personal taste is. He hands her a bible and right as I was thinking, how is that going to ever help her?, Elise chuckles and sets it down on the bed when he leaves. That’s what I thought. Religion has never come into play in Insidious and I didn’t it want it to start. On a positive note for Elise, she finds her brothers old whistle that their mother gave him when he was six but thought he lost. That whistle becomes a pretty significant part of the story and I wasn’t really expecting it so that was a nice change of pace. Elise is eventually led into the basement, where her mother was murdered and where her father would make her go when she admitted she saw ghosts, and sees a woman who screams at Elise to help her. She doesn’t say help me but help her, signaling to Elise that someone else needs help. 

The next day the boys and Elise go to the diner in town and run into Elise’ nieces, Melissa and Imogen, who she didn’t know existed and she sees her brother for the first time after she left at 16. Naturally he told her to stay away from him and his family but Elise gives Melissa a photo she took of herself holding the whistle the night before and tells her to give it to her father. After another eventful night, the movie gave a surprising but enjoyable twist. Turns out Garza, the guy who owns the house now, is keeping a hostage chained behind a wall in the basement. Clearly he was more crazy than just being haunted by a ghost in Elise’ bedroom. Elise of course manages to find her with the help of the ghost and the whistle! One blow for yes and two for no. I always enjoy things like that because it can lead to a genuinely good jumpscare. It didn’t here but it was still a good scene. The one complaint I have is that it’s taking so long to finally see something other than Keyface demons hand and of course, who does he go after? Elise’ niece Melissa. Now I was watching the way the demon crawled on the floor and instantly I was reminded of Samara Morgan. He almost had that same look to his skin as well. Now clearly this demon isn’t a fan of noise because he uses one of his key fingers and sticks it in Melissa’s throat to silence her screams. There’s no backstory as to who this demon actually is, why he doesn’t like noise, what each key means or anything. So that leaves questions for us who have a interest in backstories of villains. Also goes back to having questions about lipstick face. Let’s give these demons their own backstory movie. 

 So Elise goes back to the house and helps her brother and Imogen find Melissa, chained and barely alive in the basement. As she’s being wheeled off, a secret comes out. Guess who can also see things and go into the further? Imogen! I wish I could inherit something like that from my family. So Elise gets knocked out and trapped in the further by Keyface and Imogen goes in for the first time to help her. After a battle against Keyface and finding Melissa, as they leave Elise comes across a red door. Now I was genuinely excited when I saw who was behind it. It was Dalton! Flashed to the scene where he fell in the attic. So by now you realize the movies are out of order but I found it exciting to see Dalton again.

 At the end you see Elise back home having a dream about Dalton and Lipstickface shows up in the window, looking a bit more crazy than usual. See he holds a lot of importance if he’s appeared in every movie and I’m dying to know why. I’ve left out a lot of details so it didn’t contain too many spoilers but overall, I thoroughly enjoyed Insidious 4 and I hope they continue the series. This was a movie I would definitely watch when I wanted a good Adrenalin rush from jump scares, not a casual Sunday movie.

💀💀💀💀 out of 5 skulls from me! 

#review #horror movie review #insidious 4 review

[lanamemories]

#001 CHARACTER SHEET:

Full Name: Lana Rose Jameson Meaning of Name: The Greek and American meaning is ‘light’, whereas the English meaning is ‘fair/good looking’. Nickname: None. Birth Date: June 18th, 1996. Astrological Sign and Details: Gemini. Common star sign traits are ‘quick-witted’, ‘expressive’ and ‘sociable’. Lana firmly believes that a person’s star sign speaks volumes about the content of their character and is always suspicious of anyone that she meets that’s a Taurus. Birth Place: Her mother went into labour backstage at the rock concert of one of the bands Lana’s father manages. She was born in New York Presbyterian.  Age: 21.

Nationality: American. Race: Caucasian. Hair Color: Auburn. Hair Style: Long and wavy.  Distinct Features of Face: Plump lips and thick eyebrows. Glasses or Contacts: None. Eye Color: Hazel. Skin Tone: She vacations a lot during summer, so she has a sun-kissed glow that lasts for a long while into winter. Scars or Distinguishing Marks: A heart shaped freckle on the inside of her right thigh, subtle freckles over the bridge of her nose and cheeks. Disabilities: None. Build or Body Type: Naturally slim, maintained by ballet. Height: 5″9′. Weight: i searched for so long n i can’t find bridgets weight anywhere bt... essentially she’s skinny Speech Patterns: Talks a mile a minute, especially when nervous. Laughs at everything and nothing. Uses a lot of filler words because she’s constantly thinking aloud so her sentence is never planned out before she says it. Tag Words: Says “like”, “totally”, “anyways” and “um” a lot.  Gestures: Almost always wildly flinging her hands around. Most of the time she finds any excuse to have some form of physical contact with the person she’s speaking to, e.g. playing with their hair, dusting lint from their shoulder. 

FAMILY AND CHILDHOOD

Mother: Victoria Jameson. Father: Richard Jameson. Mother’s Occupation: Former model, presently operating as a socialite and doing charity work. Father’s Occupation: CEO of Jameson Records. Family Finances: Wealthy. Birth Order: Caleb Jameson is the oldest, Lana the youngest. Brothers: One, Caleb Jameson. Sisters: None. Other Close Family: None particularly, save for a handful of cousins they see during holidays. Best Friend: Frankie Vigo. Other Friends: Teddy Lawrence, Ophelia Knox, Gabe Leitner, Imogen Bauer, Elias Elliot, A.J. Sullivan, Melody Forbes, Jude Hayward. Probably more that I’m missing. Lana’s quite a social butterfly. Enemies: None. Pets: None. Home Life During Childhood: Lana was often treated like she didn’t exist. She could go for days on end without her parents ever saying one word to her. She’d often have to sort out her own meals because they’d forget about her and she was so touch starved growing up, it’s likely that’s one of the main contributors towards her sex addiction today. One of her most vivid memories as a child was reaching to hold her mother’s hand when she got nervous crossing the road, only to have her slap her off her and turn her head the other way. What Did His, Her or Their Bedroom Look Like: An explosion of pink. Picture every teenage girls room from a chick flick in the early 00′s. Very Jennifer Check, posters everywhere, giant fluffy cushions, the works. Any Sports or Clubs: She used to be a cheerleader in high school and she’s always done ballet from being tiny.  Schooling: She went to high school further into the city (New York) and obviously is now enrolled at Lockwood to complete her diploma.  Favorite Subject: Growing up, she used to love art and also debate as well as dance. Now it’s probably just dance. Popular or Loner: Popular. Important Experiences or Events: Caleb shipping off to the army as well as Caleb being discharged on grounds of PTSD after his unit were attacked, seeing him losing his best friend right in front of him. He was never the same after that and therefore the one person that Lana actually thought she mattered to in the world was essentially gone. Health Problems: ADHD and sex addiction. Religion and beliefs: Atheist.

PERSONAL

Bad Habits: Sleeping with people to avoid dealing with her feelings, biting her lip when she’s nervous, playing with her hair and generally fidgeting when people speak to her. Good Habits: Obsessively always keeping a pack of gum on her because she hates bad breath, sending good morning texts and practising her ballet. Best Characteristic: Her ability to start up a conversation with just about anyone. Worst Characteristic: Her inability to open up and have a serious conversation about her emotions. Worst Memory: Her mother finding out that she got blackout drunk and had a threesome with two of her father’s close associates. She didn’t seem to take into account the fact that it was vastly inappropriate for them to be talking to Lana in the way they had which lead to the encounter, or the fact that she was drunk when it happened. She told Lana she was disgusting and didn’t look at her in the face again after for three months. Best Memory: Having a childish bicker with Caleb at the park and throwing his whole loaf of bread into the duck pond in protest. When he was mad at her, she attempted to reach out and fish it back only to fall in, herself. She’d never seen him laugh that hard before and eventually she was joining in, too. It was the last time she can remember him smiling. Proud of: Nothing in particular. Embarrassed by: The fact that her parents don’t love her and she can’t work out why. Driving Style: Wild, anxious and erratic. Screams a lot, particularly when navigating busy junctions or highways. Strong Points: Exuberant, good-willed for the majority, quick-witted, sociable, charming, imaginative and resilient. Temperament: Ridiculously animated and sunshine bright, usually. Attitude: Same as above, except she can sometimes be unintentionally rude in the name of humour and not realise just how insensitive she’s being. Weakness: Her stubborn refusal to let anyone hear what she’s actually thinking in terms of serious matters. Considering she talks so much, it’s amazing just how little she actually says. Fears: Loneliness. Irrelevancy. The death of a loved one.  Phobias: Pigeons and blood. Secrets: Her sex addiction. Regrets: Letting Caleb sign up to the army without putting up more of a fight. Feels Vulnerable When: Someone asks her something personal about herself. Pet Peeves: Bad breath, poor sense of personal hygiene, making a commitment. Sexuality: Pan-sexual. Exercise Routine: She has a lot of ballet rehearsals and training weekly, so that along with a vigorous (to put it lightly) sex life keep her well in shape. Day or Night Person: Both. Introvert or Extrovert: Extrovert.  Optimist or Pessimist: Optimist. 

LIKES AND PREFERENCES

Music: Synth-pop and disco, mostly. She also loves early 2000′s classics, e.g. Britney, Robyn. She also selectively listens to classic rock records as a result of her father’s influence. Books: Lana isn’t particularly a huge reader, although she used to be obsessive over the Twilight books during her early teens. Magazines: Any trashy celebrity magazine, Lana loves to flip through. She’s a fiend for salacious gossip and anything that discusses the wild escapades of Lindsay Lohan. Foods: Lana eats anything and everything. She particularly loves Greek yogurt mixed in with honey, though, as well as any kind of candy. She has a big sweet tooth. Drinks: Again, she’s pretty flexible in this department. She really likes cherry cola, though. Animals: Lana’s a big dog person. She also has always had an affinity for sloths because she loves how slow they move and how long their arms are. Sports: Dance. Gymnastics, briefly, when she was younger, as well as cheer, but currently she only actively pursues dance, ballet in particular. Social Issues: She thinks Trump is ugly and is a big advocate for trans-sectional feminism. Favorite Saying: Country booooyyeee, ah luuuurve yew... Color: Red. Clothing: Seventies style, Penny Lane inspired jackets with fur fringed cuffs. Any kind of boldly coloured fur coat, actually. Glittery boots. Spaghetti strap mini’s. Shrunken cartoon t-shirts that wear like a crop. Anything flamboyant and colourful, Lana loves. She dresses a lot like Cher from Clueless, Rachel Green from the early Friends seasons and Brittany Murphy’s character in Uptown Girls. Jewelry: None in particular. Games: She used to always play Saints Row when she was younger. Websites: Twitter, Tumblr, Vine and PornHub. TV Shows: Girlboss and Sex in the City. Movies: Almost Famous, Heathers and Stand By Me. Greatest Want: To be the centre of someone’s world. Greatest Need: For somebody to show that they care.

LIFESTYLE

Home: Currently lives in her sorority house. Household furnishings: Her room has lots of fluffy cushions, a hamburger on-the-cord phone like Ellen Page’s in Juno, a holographic vinyl record player from Urban Outfitters. She also has a whole bunch of fairy lights and a neon mood light. Lots of feather boa’s and strange costume pieces strewn around as well as scantily clad lingerie. Very aesthetically pleasing, very messy, very Tumblr. Favorite Possession: A stack of polaroids her and Frankie have amassed over their many wild adventures. Neighborhood: Rochester. Town or City Name: New York. Married Before: No. Significant Other Before: She’s had a whole string of exes, each one equally awful. Lana settles for pretty much anyone, as long as they pay her attention. She doesn’t really believe she deserves much more. Children: N/A. Relationship with Family: Strained. Her parents do their best never to talk to her. She does her best to keep in contact with Caleb, but he prefers to isolate himself and self destruct rather than seek her help. Car: None, although she keeps test driving a vintage Cadillac and has her eye on buying it, despite the impracticality of the purchase. Pets: None. Career: Student. Salary: N/A. Other Income: N/A. Dream Career: Professional ballet dancer. She dreams of performing as the black swan. Dream Life: One furnished with close friends and family, all of which actually value her presence. She wouldn’t have to struggle with a sex addiction in an ideal world, either. Sex could be something treasured and intimate, not something she feels a compulsion to tick off a list. Love Life: On the rocks with Teddy and battling a whole fistful of crushes on just about everyone she’s close to. In other words, a mess. Sexual Turn Ons: Assertiveness, teasing, exhibitionism. Sexual Turn Offs: Constantly asking if she’s enjoying herself, awkwardness, any amount of romance. Hobbies: Ballet, cruising Craigslist for sex ads with strangers, aimlessly tapping through Omegle chats, shopping, going to parties. Guilty Pleasure: She knows all of the words and choreography to the Hoedown Throwdown by Hannah Montana. Sports or Clubs: Ballet. Talents or Skills: Ballet, networking. Intelligence Level: While she isn’t particularly book smart, Lana is thoroughly creative and a great people person. 

#lockwoodtask001 #lockwood:points #neglect tw #ptsd tw #addiction tw #hypersexuality tw #rape tw #not like explicitly but implied that it was Creepy circumstance

[pokeasleepingsmaug]

To Lie Down With Wolves: Chapter 5

The fifth chapter of the collaboration fic @underthenorthstar and I are writing, hope you guys enjoy it.

Here’s the AO3, where you can also find the previous chapters: http://archiveofourown.org/works/11931633/chapters/27646050

Tag list: @bonniebird @ally22042000 @persephone-is-here-omg @nekodalita @aalexandra2712 @ceridwenofwales @im-the-pilot-bodhi-rook @ivars-pet @lostinthoughtsandfeelings @bitchccraft @sister-wives-of-kattegat @tiyetiye @letsbedragonstogether @ivarthefuckboy. Sorry if I missed anyone!!

TW: choking, predatory behaviour.

Imogene knows God has forsaken her when she begins to understand the heathen tongue; when the growls and snarls of the tall wolf begin to form words in her ear. She will live and die in sin, and even the flames of hell will not be hot enough to cleanse the filth from her soul. She has not even been among the heathens for a full turn of the moon, and this is the moment that makes her realize rescue is not coming. There was always some hope, buried deep in her, that Brida had rallied the surrounding villagers. She realizes now it was a fool's dream; those taken aboard the long, fast ships never return from the frozen north.

Her hope withers, leaving her empty as a winter woods. Not even the voice of the wolf's pup, bright and clear as birdsong, lifts her spirits on that cold late-summer morning. “Papa, is she staying with us forever? I like her. She cooks better than you.” Her master merely snorts. She's come to learn that he seldom speaks before breakfast. Instead, it's always Jerrik's cheerful little voice breaking the tense silence of early morning. Sometimes his innocence lightens her, but this morning he fills her with despair because she understands everything he's saying. Imogene wishes she had the courage to run to the shoreline and fill her lungs with this bitter northern sea. Instead, she turns the bread over to keep it from burning. Weak, so weak. Her legs are like lead but her hands are steady. A small victory.

Ubbe—that's his name, the wolf's, and although she doesn't dare use it she can't help but wonder how it would taste on her tongue—holds a callused hand out to her. She drops a loaf of hot bread into his palm, keeping her eyes on the floor. His eyes are on her like teeth dragging across her skin. It's all she can do not to squirm under the weight of his gaze. She can't fathom why he fought so hard to keep her, can't forget the anger roiling in his bright eyes. Her upper arm still bears bruises from his iron fingers. She only understands that she's his now, forever, and somehow he seems better than the man with the useless legs. Imogene shudders, remembering again the flash of his knife, the spill of blood from the woman he killed on the docks. Better an angry wolf than a swift, glinting knife.

She can hear the quiet ripping of the bread in Ubbe's long, blunt fingers. He huffs a few short breaths on it, and out of the corner of her eye she sees him hold the bread out to his son. The boy pops it into his mouth and shoots a grin at her. “S'good.” Imogene smiles at him, quick and tentative, before ducking her head back to the floor. Ubbe's eyes are still on her, a wolf deciding where to sink his fangs.  Imogene tries her best to ignore him.

She stands, forces her leaden legs to move to the small bed in the corner. Smoothing the furs gives her something to do, something to focus on besides the inescapable gaze of the predator she calls master. When the furs are arranged nicely on Jerrik's bed, she moves toward the large bed on the opposite wall. She's barely laid a hand on it when feet are thudding quickly across the wooden floor toward her. A hand is on her throat before she can even cry out, forcing her against the wall beside the bed.

“You do not touch my bed,” Ubbe growls, his breath hot in her face. His fingers tighten like chains across her throat, and her hands scrabble uselessly against his iron grip. “Do you understand?” He's forcing her to meet his cold, brilliant blue eyes, narrowed with rage. She barely has the presence of mind to nod. He loosens his fingers just a fraction; she watches his bright eyes flit down to her parted lips before his gaze bores into her again.

He's gone as swiftly as he was at her throat, broad back retreating as she falls gasping to her knees. The silence in the hut seems to hum with tension; she sees it in Jerrik's wide, startled eyes, the way he refuses to look away from the fire. Ubbe carelessly tosses a basket full of laundry at her without even looking in her direction. She doesn't catch it in time, and scrambles to pick it all up before he notices and chokes her again. “Do not come back until it's dry.” He's panting like he's the one who was choked, like he can't catch his breath, and he still won't look toward her.

Imogene is halfway out the door when a snarl from Ubbe halts her, a rabbit frozen in the path of a wolf. He shoves a cloak roughly into her hands. She doesn't pause to put it on until she's well away from his house, but she's glad for it. The sun has barely risen and the cold dew is soaking through the hem of her dress. The village is quiet this early in the morning, only a few women are gathered at the well for water. Imogene ignores them, head down, as she walks to the stream at the edge of the woods.

She sighs and ties her skirt above her knees to save it from the mud of the bank. God has already left her to live in sin, what does she care if someone sees her bare legs? Better the indignity of bare legs than her only dress being filthy. The muck feels like ice against her knees as she sinks into it, pulling the first piece of soiled clothing out of basket and dunking it into the water. The chill settles itself deep into the joints of her fingers. She grabs the chunk of hard gray-white soap and rubs it roughly over the garment.

She sets the soap aside, kneading the large green tunic to work the dirt and sweat out. She pushes it under the cold water again, working her fingers methodically through the soapy fabric. The suds swirls away along the glinting surface, and Imogene pulls the tunic from the water. She shakes it hard, sending droplets flying, and stands to drape the shirt over the branch of a nearby tree to dry.

She kneels again, scrubbing and scrubbing until her hands are chapped and raw and her knees filthy and numb. The sun is high in the sky now and she's since removed the cloak Ubbe gave her and washed it. Imogene presses her stiff hand into the small of her aching back, groaning as she straightens.

“Why didn't you wash your dress?” She jumps to her feet at the deep voice, and her master steps toward her with amusement glinting cruelly in those hungry eyes of his.

“I—it's the only dress I have.” Imogene hates the way her voice sounds, rough and squeaky from disuse. She can't even remember the last time she's spoken.

The wolf wrinkles his nose in mild distaste. “All the more reason to wash it.” He crosses his arms over his broad chest, and Imogene barely stops herself from whimpering. There's something dangerous in the way he's standing, like keeping himself from pouncing on her is an immense effort. “Wash your dress. And,” he swallows, his throat bobbing. “Tell me your name.”

“Imogene.” She's barely breathing as she loosens the ties on her dress, unable to meet his eyes as she feels them devouring her. Unbearable humiliation rises to color her face red. This heathen, this sinful man with his hungry eyes and hard hands, will be the first to see her nakedness. She hates that she is his, hates the way she obeys him. Maybe a flashing knife across her throat would be better than this slow torture, this patient predator toying with his food. She wants to scream, to cry, to push him down into the cold stream and watch his skull crack on the rocks.

Instead, her shaking hands pull the dress over her head. The crisp air kisses her skin, raising goosebumps on her arms, and her nipples tighten against the cold. She shivers as she dips the dress into the cool stream, the water up to her elbows. She drags the dress out and runs the bar of soap all over it, fingers quickly working to scrub her only dress clean. She dunks it into the water again, hating the feel of this man's predatory gaze on her exposed skin. Imogene is weak, so weak, as she rises to hang her dress on a branch.

She finds the damp cloak and drags it down, wrapping it around herself and finally feeling a little safer. When she turns back around, face still burning, Ubbe is gone. Only the snap of a branch and a soft growl let her know he was there at all. Imogene sinks to her sore, dirty knees, and cries. She wants to to bathe, to wash the feeling of his eyes from her skin, but she's afraid he's still watching her. Stalking her from the shadows like the wolf from her nightmares. She hugs the cloak tighter and tries to still her shaking.

#ubbe ragnarsson #ubbe lothbrok #ubbe's wolf pack #the sinnamon roll #the quiet beast #who's afraid of the big bad wolf? #the big bad wolf #ubbe imagine #ubbe fic #ubbe x oc #ubbe x imogene #to lie down with wolves fic #collaboration fic #collab fic #underthenorthstar #to lie down with wolves

[nanami-momozono]

GET TO KNOW YOU TAG

I was tagged by the queen @eyesoutoffocus Karolina you’re the sweetest girl I swear everytime you tag me in this stuff I get so happy that you want to know me more and I enjoy so much learning more about you... and for what I can see you’re one of the kindest people in the world ♥♥

rules: tag ten tumblrs you want to get to know

gender: female

star sign: Pisces

height: 170 and something (not sure it’s been ages since I seized my height)

middle name: I don’t have one ahah

when was the last time you played air guitar?: i don’t remember... that’s not a dance I usually do...

who is your celebrity crush?: Choi Seunghyun My love T.O.P

what’s a sound you love? and hate?: that I love.... when people search stuff on their pencil case and it’s full of pencils and things.....

Sound that I hate: people eating, but depends on the moment and the noise, and the person and how they do it... very complicated

Put your itunes on shuffle… what are the first six songs that pop up?:

(Itunes... )

1. Selena Gomez and Marshmello- Wolves

2. Zico- I am you, You are me (the best love song ever written, by the albert einstein of music)

3. Taylor Swift- Dancing with our hands tied

4. BTS- the legendary Mic drop

5. Taylor Swift- So it Goes

6. Exo- Monster (Yeah I still listen to this one)

grab the book nearest to you and turn to page 23. what does line 17 say?: “Maud miró a ver si todavía había algún cuadro de...(la señora Champion colgado de las paredes)”-Imogen Robertson “Un Invierno en París” Wonderful book, I recommend it.

do you believe in ghosts?: I’m not sure... but mostly...yes ahahah

do you drive and if so, have you ever crashed?: No!! but I went into this thing from college where you can see how an accident is (the purpose was to know the efficency of seat belts) and it was pretty awesome (I mean, it was fun because it was fake)

what was the last book you read?: The walking Dead- 1st volume

do you like the smell of gasoline?: Oh yeahhh a ella le encanta la gasolina dame más gasolina

what was the last movie you saw?: Marrowbone-  Sergio G.Sánchez

what’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?: I’ve never broke anything but Once, I was cooking pasta at night, I was really fat back then okay, well I did a whole plate of spaghetti and wanted to warm it in the microwave, and I realized I wanted more tomato sauce, since I was too lazy to put the dish out of the microwave, I poured the sauce while it was inside. The microwave was still super hot ( because it was on) and I burnt my hand, I still have a scar, it really hurted back then and I was really young, but I was scared of my stupidity so I didnt say anything to my parents and I guess that’s why it’s still there because I didnt take care of it properly ahahaha

do you have any obsessions right now?: Reputation, BTS and TOP and Jumin Han (well this ones are the ones I’ve had for the whole 2017 year so)

do you tend to hold grudges against people?: not really

in a relationship?: if the instagram messages I send to TOP without an answer doesn’t count, and if my exchange calls with Jumin doesn’t count either, then... NO

I tag these queens: @sakku22 @d-procrastination @mamajustkilledademon and anyone else who wants to do it.

#tag game #karolina #eyesoutoffocus #nanami-momozono #zico #selena gomez #taylor swift #bts #exo #jumin han #top #reputation

[lakesandquarries]

Great White Gravity - Chapter Two

Pairings: taako/kravitz, taako & angus mcdonald Characters: taako, kravitz, angus mcdonald Other Tags: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, sazed sucks, ango and his 2 dads, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, sad boys Warnings: sazed, ptsd,  Summary: In the aftermath of the goblet, Taako tries to deal. Other Notes: hella spoilery. title from “lifeline” by imogen heap shoutout to @juicywizards for their amazing fanart!!

AO3

In the morning, Taako remembers why he never shares a bed with anyone.

For one thing, it inevitably ends with someone on the floor. He wakes up with his face pushed against the carpet, fibers probably being absorbed into his face. He does not have enough cleanser for this. Sighing, he pushes himself up, cringing at the feeling of lint clinging to his face.

Ugh.

Angus, meanwhile, is curled up in Taako’s bed. Taako’s big, beautiful, soft bed. He's even cuddling with Taako's sleep sack.

Whatever. It's not like he needs any more sleep. He stands, stretching his limbs and wincing at the series of cracks and pops. He takes a moment to glance in his mirror, trying to brush the carpet bits off his face, making sure his hair looks decent, adjusting his lacy pink nightgown.

He leaves Angus. Kids need sleep, right? Probably.

As he walks into the living room, Magnus waves. “Yo,” he calls. “You sleep well?”

“Yeah,” Taako says. It's only a half lie, really.

“Then why did I hear the door open at like, four am?”

….fuck.

“Uh,” Taako says, twisting one of his rings. “Look, Magnus -”

“You don't have to lie,” Magnus says. “I get it. Nightmares, right?”

“...maybe,” Taako admits.

Magnus stands and walks over to Taako. Elves are supposed to be taller than humans, but Magnus is tall and Taako's short, and Magnus is almost exactly a head taller than him.

Magnus holds his arms out, a wordless offering, but Taako makes a show of rolling his eyes and huffing before he accepts the hug. Magnus is good at hugs. He's like a dog, almost, big and soft and sometimes a little scary looking until you realize all he wants is to be friends. Taako lets Magnus envelop him, leaning all his weight on the human until Magnus is basically holding him up.

It's...nice. He'd never admit it out loud, of course, but there's something nice about letting someone else hold him. He lets himself zone out, shutting his eyes.

He wakes up two hours later, on the couch, Magnus still holding him.

“Heyyy,” Magnus says, patting Taako's hair. “You fell asleep hugging me.”

“I'm dead,” Taako says. “This is the worst thing to ever happen to me.”

Magnus pets his hair. Taako longs for death’s sweet embrace.

….speaking of. He sits up quickly, nearly falling off the couch. There’s a half-formed idea in the back of his head, working its way to actual thought.

Kravitz is dead. Therefore, if Taako fed him poisoned food, he’d be totally fine. And Taako could spin it as a romantic date, instead of him being a fucked up mess.

It’s perfect. A grin makes its way onto his face, and Magnus looks at him.

“Taako? You okay there bud?”

“Peachy,” Taako says. “I just had the best idea.”

“You wanna share, or…?”

“Nope!” Taako shouts, shoving himself off of Magnus and rushing to his room. He ignores Angus, still asleep on the bed, and digs through the pockets of his cape.

“Where is it, where is it…” he mutters, wishing he kept his pockets neater. Finally, underneath three candy wrappers and a ring, he finds what he’s looking for - his Stone of Farspeech. He glances at Angus before he calls Kravitz.

“Yo, Kravitz, my dude, you there?” Not his best opening, but whatever. He can work with it.

“Taako?” Kravitz asks.

“Got it in one. I was wonderin’ if you’d maybe like to….Come stop by? Hang out?”

Kravitz is silent on the other end.

Shit, Taako thinks. Shit, shit shit.

“Is this for business, or for pleasure?” Kravitz asks.

Taako grins. “Pleasure,” he tells Kravitz, voice smooth and with no trace of the panic he was feeling just a few seconds ago.

Kravitz makes a noise. Taako’s not entirely sure what it means - confusion, maybe? But he continues on. “I was thinking, our last….Meeting ended kinda abruptly, right? So maybe you could do you little rift thing again, come over at….well, time’s a little weird up on the moonbase, but let’s say in six hours?”

“Oh,” Kravitz says. “I would…” He mumbles something about jobs he has, and Taako can hear him flip through some papers and write something down, and finally Kravitz speaks again. “I can’t get there for nine hours,” he says, sounding genuinely sorry. “Would that be alright?”

“Yeah, that’d work,” Taako says, trying his best to sound like he doesn’t even care if Kravitz takes nine hours or three or two days. Gotta be cool.

“So. It’s a date, then?” Kravitz asks.

“It’s a date. Wear something nice,” Taako says, and Kravitz snorts.

“I’ll see you then, Taako.” Kravitz ends the call.

Nine hours. He can definitely be ready by then. He just has to get everyone of the suite, take a long shower, make sure he looks perfect, and cook an entire meal.

He can do this.

“Sir?”

Oh, fuck.

“Who was that?” Angus asks, tilting his head at Taako.

“How much did you hear?” Taako asks in response.

“Are you really going on a date, sir?” he asks, with a face that can only be described as “delighted”.

“Hells yeah,” Taako says, grinning at Angus.

“Who’s it with? Do I know them? Are they nice? Are they part of the Bureau? Are they -”

“Woah, woah, Ango, slow down. You don’t know him, he’s cool, and he’s not part of the Bureau.”

Angus frowns. “But if he’s not part of the Bureau, why’re you inviting him here? How are you inviting him? The Director won’t be happy, if she finds out.”

“Um,” Taako says. “Well, uh….He’s aware of the Bureau? It’s complicated, don’t worry yourself about it.”

“It’s okay if you don’t wanna tell me,” Angus says. “What’s his name?”

“I’ll tell you his name but you gotta promise not to tell anyone else. Okay?”

Angus nods, rolling his eyes.

“His name is Kravitz. And no one can know about that, okay?”

“Okay, okay. Can I meet him?”

“Maybe some other day.” Probably never.

“Okay!” Angus says, still looking delighted. Taako grins at him.

“Now, you gotta go back to your room, cause I need to prepare.” He makes a motion to push Angus and the boy nods, scurrying off the bed. He glances back at Taako, hand on the doorknob.

“Thanks, Sir,” he says quietly, a tentative smile on his face. Taako’s about to say something snarky, but he stops himself.

“Anytime, Ango,” he says, and Angus nods at him before slipping out of the room.

----

As it turns out, nine hours is just enough time. Taako takes an hour long bath, first, then takes another half hour just to dry off and fix his hair, and then it’s two hours to get dressed and do makeup, leaving him with five and a half hours to cook and get Magnus and Merle out of the suite.

Which, speaking of, he has an idea.

“Angus!” he says as he turns his Stone to Angus’s channel. “Ango, I need your help!”

“What do you need?” Angus says a moment later, sounding slightly out of breath.

“I need you to get Mags and Merle out of the suite.”

“I can do that, Sir!” Angus says cheerfully. “I’m great at distracting people. It’s an important part of being a detective! How long, and when?”

“As long as you can. I won’t need you to for another couple of hours, but I’m gonna need them gone. Can’t have those bozos screwing up my date.”

Taako can practically hear Angus nod. “Okay! Call me when you need me!” he says, and then, almost as an afterthought, he adds, “I love you!” and hangs up.

Fuck him, Taako might think he loves the kid back. He quickly takes his feelings and pushes them as far down as possible. Fuck that shit.

This is no time for feelings. It’s time for cooking.

He shoos Merle and Magnus out of the kitchen, quite literally, and makes a frankly unreasonable amount of food. Some of it is the kind of simple shit he makes Merle and Magnus all the time, which he nearly throws at them. While they’re eating round one he makes a quick call to Angus, telling him to do his thing

“You’re in a mood,” Merle comments as a sandwich nearly hits him in the face.

“Hello, Sirs!” Angus says as he opens to door to the suite.

“Oh god,” Merle says. “Who invited him?”

Angus’s shoulders slump. “I just wanted to ask you guys for some help…” he says quietly.

“What d’you need, Ango?” Magnus asks, ruffling the boys hair. Angus grins at Taako, and Taako gives him a thumBs up before vanishing back into the kitchen.

“I wanted to ask if you and Merle would….train me, maybe?” He whispers the last part, still loud enough that Taako can hear, continuing with, “I know Taako already is but he can only train me in magic and I wanna learn other stuff too!”

“Ugh,” Merle complains.

“Shush,” Magnus says. “Of course, Angus! Wanna go to the icosagon?”

“Yes!” Angus says, and Taako doesn’t have to look to know there’s stars in Angus’s eyes. He listens to Merle make a few more half-assed protests before the sound of the door closing and then blissful silence.

The silence lasts about ten seconds, immediately replaced by the sound of cooking and Taako’s loud, off-key singing.

He goes for something kinda simple. Pasta.

From scratch.

So, okay, not that simple. He’s got the dough ready when he realizes he has no way to flatten it into actual noodle shapes. He takes a deep breath.

Okay. He just has to reshape them with magic. It’s not even transmutation magic. He can do this.

It takes him twenty minutes to reshape the dough into noodles.

He leaves the noodles for now, letting them sit, and getting started on his sauce. Just a simple marinara tonight.

He can do this, he reminds himself, shutting his eyes and transmuting a cut in half tomato into a whole tomato.

Everything will be fine.

It’s incredible how much someone can cook in three hours. By the time all the food is ready, he has half an hour to set the table, which he manages in fifteen minutes, leaving him with just enough time to have a panic attack.

What if it tastes awful? What if he someone manages to kill an already dead man? What if Kravitz realizes how stupid and awful and pathetic he is?

Stop, he thinks. He can’t start crying now, he’ll ruin his makeup and he absolutely does not have the time to redo it all. He takes a deep breath, then another, than a third, until he’s breathing like a normal person again.

He’s fine. It’s fine. Everything. Is. Fine.

….probably.

#the adventure zone #taz #taakitz #taako taco #angus mcdonald #cora writes #adventures of cora #gwg