#yes I know this happened a while ago

[make-me-imagine]

Me, after running out of new posts on my Following page: Guess I should go to my For You Page to find new stuff!

Tumblr For You Page: You want the same posts again?!

Me: Uhm, no, new posts please?

Tumblr FYP: Same posts you've already seen!!? Yes!

#another stupid update #wasnt the fyp supposed to be for stuff you havent seen? #why is it now 50% of my following #whats the point in having the option to look at both separately if one is just both anyways? #yes I know this happened a while ago #tumblr #tumblr updates #shit post #ignore me #fyp

[itspileofgoodthings]

one of my fave things about teaching is that I’m NOT a counselor and I don’t have to get into the weeds with a student but also I’m part of their life every day and i see when they’re struggling and I can ask how them how they’re doing and make sure that they know I see them on a steady, daily basis and it will be healing for both of us

#I teach a student who hit a wall a few weeks ago and just refused to go to school and was just all around struggling with his mental health #and this is not a kid who wants to talk to me about it or would even know how and I also know he has people where he can #But I’ve just tried to make sure that There’s a little extra contact and a few more questions and just a little bit more #and obviously I am not the cause of his doing better but overall I know that it helps #while still being such a subtle and ordinary human exchange that doesn’t force either of us to go to extreme lengths #like man I really LOVE that space and living in it #and just being a (hopefully) stable place for the kids to be seen in a small but consistent way #teaching tag #something about holding them in the safety of manners while also modeling what that looks like for them #it’s so gratifying to me and it helps me too! #like yes we should greet each other! We should ask how we’re doing! we should exchange pleasantries #and it’s important to me that that happens without getting personal sometimes or overly involved #pleasantries don’t have to be cold things and you can be seen and validated by a momentary kind glance as much as by someone digging #into your soul #it can be light and life-giving at the same time #it can be fun! #I’m sorry I’m rambling and over-saying this but it’s Saturday #!!!!!!

[dangerous-advantage]

(Image description below 'read more' line.)

[Image ID: A four-by-four alignment chart on a white background with text descriptions to the left and to the top of the squares.

The top left description reads, "seems like they'd be good at parenting." The top right description reads, "seems like they'd be bad at parenting."

Then, from the top down, to the left of the squares, the other set of descriptions reads: "excellent child rearing instincts," and "never trust them with a child in your life."

Each of the four squares contains an image of a different character. At the top left is an image of Lan Wangji of the Mo Dao Zu Shi donghua. He sits between the descriptors "seems like they'd be good at parenting," and "excellent child rearing instincts."

In the top right square sits an image of Wei Wuxian, also of the Mo Dao Zu Shi donghua. He sits between the junction of "seems like they'd be bad at parenting" and "excellent child rearing instincts."

In the bottom left square is an image of Xie Lian from the Tian Guan Ci Fu manhua. He occupies the square with the captions, "seems like they'd be good at parenting" and "never trust them with a child in your life."

Finally, in the bottom left square, sits an image of Hua Cheng from the Tian Guan Ci Fu manhua. He occupies the junction between "seems like they'd be bad at parenting" and "never trust them with a child in your life". /End ID]

#look ok #i see all the cute little fics with xl and hc talking about becoming parents and etc etc #and that's cute! that's adorable!! let them be happy!!! #but. you have to admit ok. hualian need to work through their own problems #like c'mon. xl picks up like AT LEAST three kids in the book and then proceeds to forget about one on his shelf for a while #just kinda. stands judgmentally with his hands on his hips about guzi and qi rong (it's really funny though don't get me wrong) #and after finally re-capturing lang ying he's like 'i'm gonna guardian you!' and then a whole bunch of shit happens and uh well #ly turns out to be the ghost of some kid xl traumatized 800 years ago come back for vengeance (L) #which means xl traumatized him multiple times lmao #we aren't even touching qi rong and lang qianqiu which YES i know the latter wasn't xl's fault and i am fully aware that the situation with #qi rong is and was complicated. BUT. come ON man can these poor kids never catch a break? the one kid he DIDN'T accidentally traumatize #turned out to be obsessively in love with him so like maybe this is for the best? #anyway i also just don't think they'd be... genuinely interested in a commitment like that? like hc would go along with anything xl wants #but he doesn't seem the type to be interested in kids (he's mostly just interested in xl) #xl isn't off the hook either ok #people bring up hc's treatment of e'ming but xl isn't exactly a saint to ruoye. i dont blame the guy he's got a lot on his mind #but he's also very.... absent #plus with the responsibilities of their respective positions all their extra time is like. spent on eachother jk? #this isn't to say xl doesn't *like* kids or anything i just don't think he would want to be a full-time parent lmao #also they DEFINITELY have their own issues with themselves as kids and i'm afraid that might translate into like. parenting #meme #tgcf #mxtx meme #tgcf meme #xie lian #hua cheng #lan wangji #wei wuxian #wei ying #lan zhan

[maddy-ferguson]

failed my driving test twice, no actual friends in college, applied to a cool thing and was rejected, no bitches...thank god i'm seeing goodfellas in theaters in a few days because what do i have going for me rn

#the only ones who understand me are cher horowitz and pacey witter. and pacey got his driver's license later (i don't remember but #like i'm sure he did lmao) we don't know if that'll ever happen to me #what's annoying is i still don't think i'm a bad driver. delusions of grandeur maybe. but like yes for like 30mn after i failed the second #time i cried like while walking to the bus stop (i only saw like three people because YEAH it takes like an hour for me to go to the place #where you take the test like it's so annoying i have to take 2-3 different buses AND THEN i don't even have it. plus the money...) and #i was like you are the dumbest bitch ever but it's not because i don't feel capable it's because i DO and i make dumb avoidable mistakes #like it's just very frustrating #talked about the no friends at school thing like a month ago. we were together on wednesday and it's actually not as bad as it felt the day #i posted that but i don't hang out with them outside of school and don't want to is my point. they're like acquaintances that i'm not sure #i like #the thing i applied to i really wanted after i failed my test i was like i need ONE GOOD THING to happen to me this month and then i was #like no i can't post that because what if i don't get it. well #no bitches is self-explanatory #and goodfellas in theaters is real remember when it was already playing earlier this year but there was only one showing and i couldn't go #and i was so annoyed. there's three this time and i could even go to all three if i wanted to. one scorsese movie every monday at 1 from #now on for me please #and like i say: brf slt

[arceal-doodles]

meet Rue: he secretly loves Muffet’s donuts.

#ive been bouncing this in me head for a while #but ye rue is essentially boss #but more hyper because what he lacks in height he has in energy #yes yes i know i mixed up fs! and sf! #a few posts ago #pretend that didnt happen LMAO #undertale #fellswap #sans #papyrus #fs!sans #arci doodles #ref

[lisbonsteresa]

they make me so

#tm #the way she immediately goes along with him there's no hesitation and then she immediately puts them in the same boat i want to scream #because there's a way to read this that it's actually too much faith; she trusts him and his methods - weird though they usually are - #maybe too much - the 'one day i'm gonna get fired because of you; that's just how it is' route #(which is like that excellent tag i saw - that lisbon's 'a rebel with the trauma of having to be responsible' - #like she likes breaking the rules and jane breaks them in fun ways (usually) and his rule-breaking gets results #- the 'people might ask why you signed on with me in the first place' bit alsosheskindofinlovewithhimnbd) #but on the other hand there is a bit of 'such little faith' too because yes he gets results but she knows firsthand (and repeatedly) #that he runs the risk of hurting - himself; others; her - while he gets those results #and she's putting them in the same boat she's making them equally responsible for anything that happens #*unequally actually she'd take the brunt of any punishment/backlash as they both know #and you COULD (and i do) see that as her trying (maybe unconsciously) to temper him; to pull him back from going TOO far #whatever you're doing you're not doing alone; remember this is on me now too don't go too far #CAN'T YOU SEE THERE'S PEOPLE WHO CARE ABOUT YOU; WHO NEED YOU #and like does the tempering always work? no; obviously; for multiple reasons #but for her to - on whatever level - think that she would be enough FOR it to work? much to think about #(it's crazy how it's so clear that on some level they both know she's the most important person to him #but they're also just....tucking that fact away until a moment comes when they can actually think fully about what it means #(which would have to be post red john but also they're just avoidant bitches too afraid to look too close i love it) #anyway i'm back at work so i'm back to thinking too much about tv shows that ended 8 years ago it's so cool and stable #(also rigsby just going along with it too lkfasdj i just adore them) #FUCK THE END OF THE EPISODE BARK BARK I FEEL CRAZY #TERESA LISBON YOU'RE SO IMPORTANT TO ME LIKE SHIT

[keeps-ache]

DARN, missed it again! 2nd anniversary of being a they/themer :D

#just me hi #i should cue a post for next year cuz i just Keep missing it hfhsv #cool though!! two years of queer yeah babyyy #i now have it/its but they/them was where i started hehe :> #i've considered neos but you know i think they'd be a bit much for me lol #character customization Truly #//i am NOT missing this blog's birthday. proooollyyyy hghfsh #these aren't such huge things but i like to know things have happened hfsh :3 #these are two things i really only celebrate on here so i've just Gotta say it :33 #//anyway i've been listening to the radio a lot (did i say that? i think i told you that some weeks ago lmao) and it's Funnn (mostlyyy) :D #yes they play the same 15 songs over and over and i'm starting to learn all the words to even the most unremarkable ones but that's part of #the Fun :DD #been listening to it because once in a while they play a song i already have in my playlist (yayy !!) or a song that i like (which then goe #in the Playlist (yayy !!)) that and it supplies a background track to whatever i'm talking about with my siblings which is funny at times #/imagine. you've slipped up. a secret of another's you were never supposed to know was mentioned by accident. so instead of #trying to excuse yourself from guilt you admit to knowing even More. the person you're speaking to is betrayed confused and overall upset. #and you're trying to get in contact with a ghost to give you pointers. it's not great. in the background Lovin On Me is playing #that's how our games have been going hfhsvhf #/i let them play in the plots of my stories sometimes and it's So Ridiculous Dude #i've had to ban specific organs from their characters because they were being wretched little beings. it Was funny though i'll not deny hfh #they've tormented shye + weirded out oath + killed and been killed many times #there were a couple times i saw genuine horror on their faces and i am living on that i'm ngl hfhsvbhs #like the horse thing! it would take a sec to explain so i won't go into it but oh i hurt myself laughing Lolll (it was dark but it was stil #funny hfbvs) #//OH i've gtg now lol -- #ciao ciao see you somewhere later from now !! :D

[k1rishiki]

there's this one artist i follow who works exclusively via commission (they're a decoden artist so they make a lot a lot of pieces in periods of time when like. an illustrator. would be able to make one) and in the last couple weeks or so i've slowly seen her page be dominated by hazbin hotel commissions and it's just so bizarre to me bc like. i've commissioned her . after 10 months of watching from afar and deliberating on what to pick i ended up going with something that has been a major part of my life for 6 years and quite literally prevented my suicide . and you're telling me there are this many people willing to drop 60usd on a fucking phone case (which they'll bring everywhere w them and will be a big part of ppl's impressions of them bc like. come on) and themed around something that's only existed for a couple weeks?? 60 fucking us dollars????

#for the record that choice was absolutely my specialest baby boy ciel and also i made my commission BEFORE i let kuro put me back in its #chokehold . i think stressing abt the ciel phone case might've been one of the contributing factors to the spiral of the last few days #and yes ik h.azbin has been around for a while but like half if not more of them are characters i know damn well weren't in the pilot #(< got curious when it first came out all those years ago. miraculously still remember what happened in the it despite my poor memory) #romeo.txt

[hexplaything]

in the tags cause i'm being insane yet again. also saying things here and not main cause it feels safer here

#a vent abt my ex if you haven't guessed LMFAO #but she's ALREADY found her next victim i cant even believe her. #literally texted me a week and a half ago begging me to take her back. straight up narcissistic behavior holy fuck #god i hope she rots #i cant believe i wasted a year and a half of my life on something that meant nothing to her. that she could just Throw away. #also yes yes let's address that i of course know this information bc i still check her blogs im not the healthiest fucking individual #but yknow a fucking trauma bond like rewires your brain and it doesn't help with the bpd on top of it all #i know i need to stop lmfao cause it just hurts me in the long run but it's the only sense of control i have around this entire thing #and i know what my therapist is gunna say shes gunna say that's exactly what narcissists will do they just move on bc we are replaceable #but holy fuck does it still hurt!!!!! that i was used and it was all for nothing #my first like everything is tainted because none of it was real #like all of it #my first adult relationship my first kiss my first time having sex and being naked in front of a person #i gave all of that away. to someone who didn't deserve it #and i cant get it back #i don't get a do over i just have to live with it all #i put so much time and energy and love into that relationship and got nothing from her #why does she get to move on and just live her life. while i am STUCK here. #i gave her so much #im just like. i don't get it i don't get why it happened why she did this shit why she used me #good girl speaks #she took so fucking much from me. i want it all back

[heartoftheancientsea]

It’s so disturbing how unsure of myself I am whenever I have to make a difficult decision that prioritizes my own wellbeing and values. I continue to break my own heart by wondering if I made the wrong choice even though I didn’t.

#yes this is about that guy again #I had finally mostly gotten over it and then he decided to call #he was being so flirty and telling me he still loved me #so I was like yeah right lol. not trying to get my hopes up for that nonsense. #so after chatting for a while I asked him if he’s slept with anyone #he got extremely defensive and kinda mad that I asked. #he basically said that I ruined the whole conversation we just had by asking him that. #🙄 eyeroll #so I told him straight up that he’s a fuckboy. he had plenty of chance to be with me. I asked him to be my boyfriend months ago and HE said #that we need to get to know each other more. #okay…. so I waited months and months of us just talking and falling in love and I thought it would happen eventually #but it never did. so I walked away. and instead of him manning up and doing something about it #he goes and fucks other women? and then tries to come back and be romantic with me? #I told him that’s absolutely NOT happening. I can never be with you romantically ever again. #part of me wonders if that was too harsh of a decision and maybe I shouldnt have said it because I still love him 😞 #but the majority of me knows it was the right thing to do. #while I was over here absolutely heartbroken and distraut over him unable to even think about being with another person in the same context #he was out there fucking other women and saying god knows what type of romantic shit to them #I could puke

[fvckmyaesthetic]

#i wish so much of my life wasn’t defined by shit that happened when I was 16 fucking years old #but here I am. just turned 21 and all I can think about is shit from five years ago #i just want to be my own person and to feel comfortable around other people #but everyone is in such a hurry to fall in love and declare their lifelong feelings for each other #i don’t even feel attraction to people. i just want someone to hold me #i want someone to support me through my shit so I don’t feel like I have to face it alone all of the time #i just want a nice comfortable hug to come home to at the end of a long day #and someone to sit with while we watch a show together to relax. even if we don’t actually say anything to each other #i don’t want to think about my whole life or the future ahead. i just want some sense of comfort that I am not alone every day #that sense of comfort you get when you look stupid and ridiculous but your rave camping neighbor asks you to kiss them #and you say yes because it’s their yearly tradition and you’re happy to help. but that’s the most nervous and most loved you’ve felt in a + #+ Minute. and now it’s just a core memory that you think about when things are shitty #man I just want a hug. why is that so hard. and why do I always have to be the strong stable one in the hug? #i want to feel like it’s okay to fall apart and finally get the support and comfort that I need #it’s too hard holding everyone else up all the time. i just want someone to hold me #i don’t know if I will ever love anyone but I just want to feel Close to someone. like I’m not in it alone. why is it So Hard to ask for a+ #+simple little hug in life. it shouldn’t be so hard and yet here I am. sad and alone and I will probably always be this way

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

my friend: hey someone just liked my Foul Legacy-themed art aha i found someone more obsessed than you

me looking at the user profile: my sibling in christ that is one of my mutuals on tumblr dot com

#hush n shush wifi #not brainrot #it was so funny #i was literally standing somewhere messaging them #and they show me the user #i think it was twitter or something #and i'm like 'dude i know that person' #(said person has a very distinct artstyle and i love it) #we foul legacy lovers stick together!!!! #anyways it's only noon but i've already had such a Day today #i woke up at like 4 AM to have a bit of an internal meltdown #my brain decided to think of all the bad things that have happened and all the bad things yet to come #something happened a while ago that i really don't want to experience again #and then the pile of meat noodles in my head went 'but what if it did' #so my brain can just shut the fuck up today is what i'm saying >:( #can i not have one (1) relaxing day free of worrying i swear #anyways!!!! enough of me being a downer!!! #time to think about sumeru again :) #morning call #(shhh yes technically it's afternoon but it's morning in my heart)

[unproduciblesmackdown]

one in a million when i watch smthing in the horror genre and don't end up disappointed to/and/or pissed off about it so like "also yeah i liked it. ooo" is like relative to that an off the charts rave review of media of the millennium. also i did think about mh a lot along the way so would recommend its affect/effect if you like mh's horror too

#i didn't realize at first that's the director/creator tim's qrting. thought a rando went ''i love mh'' & he went ''& i love smthing else'' #saw this a few weeks ago while also like writing or drawing or smthing like oh good plot's beside the point? b/c i'm splitting this focus #even checking in w/recaps was both like oh ok i missed that / didn't realize xyz could be a Thread or something but each of the like three #or four recaps i went over Also saw points differently in terms of even like; who was there or said what lmfao. or noting sm detail at all. #i went ''oh worm?'' at some early shot that may or may not have even gone mentioned by any of them. depending lol. doesn't matter #anyways we don't have time for tags media analysis except that i'll count this as: once again horror for children wins. even tho it's... #not rated? well anyways you know. probably generally not advisable for children as a direct audience lmao. however #like yes as per the premise as a child we've all experienced this [the media] anyways. perturbing summons dreams we've all had em #anyhow fr i'd even struggle to think of horror movies i'd say i mostly liked / would or did rewatch but still wasn't like. i disliked major #elements / choices to the point of being pissed off abt it. so many movies i can't be bothered to watch b/c i already know specifics like #i don't like or respect any of you people. or choices or elements or premises or executions or effects. not even interested fr like lord... #but often what has better odds are mediums that Aren't straightforwardly tv / film. like i'd compare mh to a series of several movies and #that's also imo largely a more apt categorization than saying it's an ARG or smthing but anyways like i'd recommend it to someone sure.... #rare to be like yeah a movie was enjoyable. & if you already liked mh then that's a useful reference point here #which like usually i'd use mh as a categorical tag but idk i guess actually it's actively popular nowadays lmfao i really don't know #posting is already exhausting like whew but this one's for whosoever happens to follow me i guess #which is possible? nonzero ppl arrived for mh but unlikely lmfao. but also ppl see it on their own anyways coincidentally. #and you never know who observes the posts like hell yeah for an anon enjoying niche akd theatreposting who is to me ambiently out there #really odd the other day seeing an mh reblog like ''??? huh. i made that eons ago; then'' & people in the tags talking abt some repost like #on the one hand that Original Source post is two layers of deactivated blogs so a repost could be archival. but if they don't say as much #i.e. that it's even from a different source then that's not exactly it then is it. but also that even finding an original document For OP #is like. oh yeah that's me actually. but then knowing & technically saying as much doesn't / didn't actually affect me as that op lol #just kind of archival on both ends then. vs someone else in the tags saying they saw it on fb 9 yrs ago? definitely didn't post it there #my true op experience: keeping it nicheposting & just kind of saying sm shit & maybe some people are out there nodding thoughtfully #oh also in case fyi. that's tim as in actor playing [also tim] in mh. & did some writing for mh & other such behind the scenes efforts also #every time i look at the text in this post i notice a new typo of mine. get it tgoether (organic typo there. so; lol)

[justinefrischmanngf]

it is EMBARRASSING how much i lose my mind when people notice things about me

#'lose my mind' is maybe an exaggeration bc i am very good @ keeping contained with it lmfao #but i should not still be thinking about literally months ago when i was having a conversation with someone about how he was #able to make eye contact more than usual and i said something like you've probably noticed that i also don't like making eye contact #and he said that he had noticed and that i should know that most things that were observable he's probably observed about me #and i said that i knew because i observe him observing #THAT'S RIDICULOUS THAT'S A RIDICULOUS EXCHANGE IT'S STUPID AND IT WAS SILLY AND BIZARRE #and it wasn't personal because we both observe everyone equally i think like it's not a him observing me specifically thing #and if it was it'd be weird and creepy but like . there's still something about that isn't there there's something #about the fact that someone somewhere notices that you don't make eye contact but also notices you in general #it's about existing in the world as a person who is seen by other people and knowing you exist to someone at least #while you're in front of them both you and they are real and it's significant because you're both bringing it up #that night as a whole should not take up so much of my brainspace #yes it was a lovely night yes i'm glad it happened but idk that it should be such a big thing for me............ #to be fair it's a much smaller thing to me than it was after it happened so it will just fade away as time passes and i have #more interactions with other people and also this guy but idk it is something that was/is significant to some extent #idk the thing is it was very personal but it also wasn't That personal i think like we truly just happened to be the last #ones left and people who enjoy conversation like that was it #anyway it's bizarre knowing that there's someone who you see more days of the week than you don't that does notice things

[munamania]

okay. so that was. okay. so ill give a little (unfortunately long) update here ig.

-this conversation was prefaced by me being like hey can i talk to you abt something and she was like yeah and i instinctively said slay and then stalled by going ‘do you ever say slay’ and she was like ‘no i dont feel like it’s my place’ and i was like ‘oh why’ and she said ‘because im a straight woman.’ so we’re back to that. and i was like ‘oh yeah ok sometimes i feel funny saying it actually im trying to stop.’ whatever

-started out SO strong just being like whew. okay. remember when i asked if something was up last week. lol this feels weird. okay anyway so i like you,

-went on to say we seemed to click so well when we first met (she was like yeah!) and i guess there was a point where i thought she might’ve felt the same

-but didn’t know if she was straight/eventually found out abt Bf and then ran into them and things seemed weird

-she cut in at this point about Hammock day and was like oh im sorry we were really drunk and i knew i needed to get stuff to u so im sorry if i was being awkward. and i was like sick well i didnt know that but it was awkward because he was being a little rude to me

-and then when you BLOCKED ME FROM YOUR STORY... didnt know if something happened or if we just didnt get along as well as i thought.. and i didnt know how things would be this year

-but you were cool and i like talking to u so i decided to just get to know u

-and we hung out and that was cool but i feel like i make u uncomfortable (she shook her head) i feel like maybe you felt more for me and things were confusing and weird and scary and that all came to a head that friday we went to that party

-or i feel like you know that id had feelings for you and im seen as this like pseudo homewrecker or whatever

-and im sorry if im misreading all of this but i needed to say it. i dont want to make u feel weird but i just dont know how else to read this situation, i dont feel like im being treated like a normal friend

-so she goes. um. honestly i dont even fucking remember how she started she was just like i felt really bad i was being a bad friend to you

-like sorry i wasnt answering your texts i then felt bad about it and i think it translated to me being awkward in person and whatever

-and i was like it’s fine, i just feel like i was getting mixed signals and i was maybe seen as like. an ego boost or someone that’s maybe making your bf jealous. sorry if that sounds presumptuous

-and she just kinda managed to swerve past that and only said she tends to be really oblivious and didn’t realize i liked her and w/e

-and that im just like. good at fostering relationships with people?? and like. we do get along so well and she was also surprised by how long we hung out alone yk

-and she said she got in her own head about only hanging out when we weren’t sober bc people have said stuff to her about that and i was like. but we have hung out sober. and she was like yeah. so i was just like?? null point

-and she like. said she appreciated me bringing this up to her and it must have taken some guts i was like yeah yk i mean i respect you and just felt like things got weird and whatever

-and then i was like ok ill get out of your hair now cause she was going out to dinner w her roommates and she was like ok. would you like a hug

-and i said yes <3 because i am so fucking smart. so i got a hug

-and basically just yk see you monday. but im walking away from all that like okaaaaaaayyyyyy.... and?????

-like. is she so far in denial of potentially maybe liking women (along with boyfriend’s gender journey) that she just. refused to even touch any of that part of the story

-yeah speaking of she did not say Anything about him. and how he played into this

-i mean im still glad i said it and it’s out there and not just rotting away in my brain. u know. and i know i needed to go in with no expectations

-and it’s nice that she still apparently wants to like be friends? but i expected at least Something. she pretended. sorry. she said she didn’t remember blocking me from her story

-and i said Yeah well. you unblocked me in time for boyfriend day. and she said ‘oh well i can see how that would have looked’ and i said ‘yeah. nice pictures’ LOL

-i did interview her for a film project and i feel like i sounded so fucking funny like such a bitch or just Weird bc i was going insane internally. or maybe im just always that annoying talking to her.

-idk guys. so i guess that’s that for now. chapter over?

#at least i got to ask her. 'are you lying to yourself about anything' and she said 'yes' and then didnt elaborate #thats not gonna help me draw conclusions at all. #i need to stop trying to draw conclusions. she's fucking weird. like whatever #i guess. i WISH there was a fight or something slightly more dramatic. but either was was extremely unfazed #or just. blindsided and refused to even acknowledge the rest of what i said #maybe she wanted to be friends with me so she ignored if boyfriend ever said anything about me and tried to be like Noooo #so me confirming i had feelings for her was like. oh shit. yk? #whatever. she's weird. everything is weird. #film girl saga #so ig im like officially officially friendzoned. is that what happened? i guess by nature of the straight thing and the bf thing one could #argue i shouldve been a while ago but u know.