What business did Mu "Stoic McBitchface" Qing have giggling when Feng Xin walked into the heavenly capital absolutely soaked in blood? I caught that sir, why are you, as a man, teeheeing for another man? 🤨
i think xie lian is the funniest mf out there. literally ascends to heaven gets kicked out ascends again gets himself kicked out AGAIN and then comes back for a third time after 800 years. he makes his communication array password “just recite the ethics sutra a thousand times” just because he thinks it would be funny to tell that to the other deities. literally builds himself his own temple bc no one else was gonna do it. he finds out who heaven is most terrified of and proceeds to fall in love with them.
Lowkey my mind is going “I need a ‘no beta we die like txj” sticker in the background, while my mind is screaming “NO BETA WE DIE LIKE SHEN QINGQIU” at the forefront.
“The cucumber (Cucumis sativus) is a widely-cultivated creeping vine plant in the family Cucurbitaceae that bears cylindrical to spherical fruits, which are used as culinary vegetables. Considered an annual plant, there are three main types of cucumber—slicing, pickling, and seedless—within which several cultivars have been created. The cucumber originates in Asia extending from India, Nepal, Bangladesh, China (Yunnan, Guizhou, Guangxi), and Northern Thailand, but now grows on most continents, and many different types of cucumber are grown commercially and traded on the global market.”
Cucumber. (2023, April 10). Wikipedia. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cucumber
I bet that when he faints, he does a little monologue cue in his mind:
“3…2…1… faints dramatically”
Nie Huaisang is such a character. He can faint on command. The character guide in the novel describes him as a dandy and lists his weapons as saber (ostensibly) and crying (actually). He stalked a canary for several days and then sneaked it into class. He collects porn and shares it with his friends. He's in a sword wizard society and his clan in particular is known for their blades but he never once has a fight scene. His characteristic accessory is a paper fan. He failed summer camp twice. He formed a Golden Core nearly a decade later than everyone else his age. When his brother was killed he set in motion a several years long revenge scheme that involved both careful planning and insane improv. He built a reputation on not knowing anything. He threw himself on his brother's killer weeping and saying "if you don't help me I'm killing myself in front or you." Truly who is doing it like him
“Qi Rong thoughts that followed me around like how baby Qi Rong followed his Cousin around like a scrunkly, rabid raccoon”
because as someone who gets upset but can’t effectively voice their frustrations, I get serotonin from watching a scrunkly little green man be stinky and cause a scene
First and foremost, how did he go from being just a brat to straight up submissive and breed-able bratty bottom?
No, like, seriously. These are two completely different individuals??? One is just a brat, and the other is a breed-able bratty bottom, and I’ll be honest here, it took me such a long time to fully appreciate the donghua design because I was so used to STARember’s design. And yes, I threw a fit to every single person I know about how vastly different his design is, I can show you the receipt.
Since his height isn’t listed… (as far as I’m aware), I’m convinced that he’s the shortest adult character in the series (yes, shorter than Ling Wen… who is TALLER than Xie Lian??????) Thus, if he were to be a dog, I can imagine him as a chihuahua. And everyone around him would be like “awww is the tiny little pookie angry???” and just make fun of him, because that’s what people do to angry Chihuahuas for some reason.
This is him throwing a fit at Pei Ming (yes, PM is a German Shepherd in my mind. Yes, I will make videos on this.)
That one specific plot-point in the novel where HC and XL are in a shack/inn and QI RONG WAS THE COOK??? Like WHAT?? Chef Boyardee who? I only know Chef Qi Rong
He’s also unfortunately selectively intelligent??? Which actually makes sense since he did grow up as a part of the royal family. And I feel like a lot of people forget that. But at the same time, even without the royal background, I feel like he has a certain sense of intelligence…. that comes from… god knows where???? And that’s kinda scary to think about, because imagine if he actually put his full thinking cap on 😭😭
Bro just straight up Out-Gay-ed Shi Qingxuan, which… I didn’t even know was possible. Like, when he flicked his wrist, I almost expected him to go: ✨✨SLAYYYY 💅✨✨
Please don’t forget the “waist snatched, tits out” potential with this man. Donghua version. Manhua version would never.
Disfigured Pikmin Qi Rong
Did I talk about “DOG HUA CHENG” and “DOG FUCKED XIE LIAN” already? Because like… despite the nasty implications, he was definitely onto something. He probably just didn’t realize to what extent 😭
I just want an official plush of this man so that I can use him as a soccer ball when it’s pouring outside and kick him around into puddles and mud and… yeah
I could have sworn I had more thoughts of him but I can’t remember now so maybe there will be a part two 🤔🤔
Oh yeah, I just remembered my friend telling me about how his name means face of sorrow or pity or something like that and just… CAN YOU IMAGINE. I need to go into a wholeass thing with this some day because when I realized that, I did not feel okay 😭