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urlocalnctstan · 3 years

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𝚃𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝙷𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚜

Genre : Angst, Fluff, Slow-burnish, Idol AU

Pairing : Jaehyun x Reader ft.Mark (other members too)

Warning(s) : strong language, age-gap, mature contents, weird writing style lmao, uh what else? idk but yeah

Disclaimer :The story is completely fictitious, idol-fan relationships are not common so some of you crazy ones out here, pls don’t get too delusional, your oppas will be your oppas only virtually, not in real life.

Playlist : Youtube Link / Written

Word Count : 5.4k

Summary : ‘Time and tide waits for none’- a quote that is universally accepted and believed. You both had had your experience of meeting the right one at the wrong time, the concept of love long forgotten after the sudden downfall of your relationship together. But will time eventually heal everything for you both?

The car came to a halt, your mind subconsciously drifting back to the humiliation you faced tonight back at the office.

“ARE YOU FUCKING DUMB, Y/N?” your boss was a fuming mess, his whole office scattered with the documents you had brought just a few moments ago. At the sight of the shredded papers, you felt you heart clench. You worked so hard for this project, disregarding God knows how many nights of your sleep. The feeling of abomination was slowly creeping up from the pit of your stomach towards the man who stood taut, seething in rage.

“HOW MANY TIMES DID I TELL YOU TO JUST DO WHAT THEY ASKED YOU TO?” He yelled, his fist furiously banging on his wooden desk, beneath his hand rested some pieces of the torn documents.

“Sir, even you know how risky it is to design as they asked to. If a blunder happens it is our company that is to be held accountable, not theirs.” you knew it was pointless to reason with the stubborn headed prick, but you had to try out your luck.

“Get out. Out, out, out. Get your fucking face out of my face.” He swished his index finger repeatedly, letting out a frustrated shriek just as I was about to exit his office. His wrath was nothing new in the office, as all the other employees shot me a rather pitying look when they saw me exiting the team leader’s office with hands full of ripped papers. Wow, my 2 weeks worth of sleep. Just wow. You didn’t bother to reciprocate their sympathetic glances, storming out of the corridor as you furiously started clicking the floor to your cabin. The jabbing of your finger on the glowing button that read ‘13’ was the only sound that resonated in the fairly empty area, earning annoyed looks from the two individuals who stood right behind you.

“Ah, fuck.” You banged your head against the steering, recalling the even as you clutched the handles harshly. “Why,” another bang. “do I,” bang. “live like” bang. “this,” bang. You could feel your face was burning without even touching it, streams of tears flowing down. Just as you were about to give yourself another bang, the sudden honk of a car made you pause amidst your ritual. Indeed all motherfuckers love to test my patience. You decide to ignore the rider, mainly because you were also partially at fault for resting in your car in the middle of the park. You twisted the metal keys as the ignition went off, signaling your car was ready to flee. Yet again, you were distracted by soft knocks. You prayed to God to help you not lose your shit, at this point you were questioning if He ever hears your woes at all. The soft knocks stop immediately when you started to pull down the window, the person straightening only crouch again.

“Y/n?” his called out unsurely, as if he were afraid of mistaking you for someone else. You knew that voice, and that is not good news. Shit.

“Mark?” you were surprised to say the least, not expecting to run into an old friend. “Oh my god! How have you been?” You shoot out of your driver’s seat, instantly being engulfed into a bone crushing hug by the male.

“I have been good. Oh god, I can’t believe this! I can’t believe I ran into you after so long!” Mark still held you tight your embrace, the sudden reunion making him feel giddy with excitement.

“Yes indeed,” you were the first to pull out from the hug. You took a moment to study him; black mask covering half of his face as he smiled widely, eyes crinkled and the signature cheekbones still the same as they were in the past. God, it’s really been so long. “What are you up to these days?”

“Er,” Mark scratched his head as he laughed nervously, unsure if he was allowed to give you spoilers about his new album. “I have been working on my solo album actually.”

“Are you for real?” You found yourself hugging Mark again at the joy of his successful career. “I’m so so proud of you mate!”

“Thank you, thank you,” Mark swayed you lightly, his voice muffled due to the mask he wore. Mark was the one to pull out now, still keeping your caged as he placed his hands on your shoulders. “In no way I am gonna let you leave without a trace again,” he almost groaned.

“Promise, I won’t anymore,” you signaled to the stack of files that rested on the backseat of your car. “They won’t leave me alone.”

“I’ll just ask your boss to assign you with more tasks then,” he giggled mischievously, earning a light smack from you at the mention of such an absurd idea.

“I’ll track your way to hell to kill you again if you do something like that,” you hissed at Mark, who was still giggling at your frustrated reaction. The atmosphere became quiet as Mark looked up in the vacant sky, deep in thoughts while you waited for him to continue. Your phone buzzed against your leather coat.

[From Bullhead] : Don’t think I am overlooking your mess. This is the first and final warning from me.

You shivered, half from the cold and half from the text you just received.

“26th, sharp at 8 PM, my place.” He snapped his fingers, hooting at the realization of having a free day in his busy scheduled life.

“Okay, done.” You should have refused, you thought. But for some reason, you found yourself agreeing to his offer, you felt both sad and guilty for disappearing out of your friend’s life without a trace. However, you couldn’t ignore the greedy feeling you felt, the want to see him again. “I think I should be done around...7:30? So I think I’ll be able to make it.” You unlocked and handed him your phone.

“You have to make it,” his eyes focused on the screen of your device, swiftly typing what you assumed was him number. “Just incase, text me if I happen to forget - no I know that look, Y/n, you must text if that happens..” He rolled his eyes, knowing that how much you would be overthinking about possibly tiring him because of his busy lifestyle. Mark dialed his number from your phone before handing it back to you. You visibly snickered at the name he saved his contact with : ‘My Boo MarkLee <3’

“Stop pretending as if you never renamed my existence as Markie Boo,” he groans, remembering how this has been his another one of the hundred pet names he had. Your conversation was cut mid way as his phone loudly vibrated in his phone, swiftly pulling it out as the guy whined in annoyance.

“Yo, I gotta go now I guess, something came up at the company.” He looked sad, pouty. “See you around, yeah?” You were pulled into another hug by the male, he surely loved to hug as usual.

“Yes, yes. Now go. Don’t be late.” You patted his back, pulling out of the hug and shooing him away towards his car.

“See ya, Mom.” He beamed as he sped off with his car.

“Dumbass.” You muttered, softly laughing at the name he would always call you by, despite being years younger than him. You rounded around your car, getting inside. The start was bad but the end was good nonetheless. The keys of your car jiggled as you closed the door. Again, you twisted the keys, your mood slightly better than before for which you were grateful. Your car’s ignition blared, as you positioned towards the exit of the park, subtly muttering ‘long ass ride.’

The digits ‘7:37’ glowed on the the small digital clock beside your desktop. You felt stiff, stretching your neck as your bones made those cracking noes. You stare at your toes, zoning out was your passion and you excelled at it. You snapped straight, letting out a deep sigh as you started to scheme the projects before you were to hand them over to your bullhead boss. Soon enough, you were done, muttering almost too loudly for everyone that you wished your boss would be napping off instead of being awake.

Good for you, your prayers were answered for the first time in a while. You quietly placed the files that contained all the details that needed to be checked again by your boss, quietly making your way out of his cabin as soon as possible. On you way, you informed his secretary you were leaving, her face wore distraught and annoyance but softens as she saw you approaching. Sometimes you felt sympathetic towards her, often asking the heavens to bless her with utmost patience and perseverance to deal with the bullhead.

The marble floor clicked with every step you took, the sounds eerily audible in the serene lobby. It was very rare for the lobby to be filled with people in evening, the employees would practically sprint off their seats as soon as the clock hits 7. You made your way out of the building, making a mental note to buy a gift for Mark on your way back to home. What would he like? Take outs? Homemade? Wine? You drove across the street before halting your car in front of the department store that was situated just a few blocks away from your office. The header of the store glowed, the alleys seemingly half-crowded with people of different occupations you assumed. You let out a hiss as you felt a chill run down your spine, it was almost the end of Autumn which meant Winter was just round the corner. You decided to rely on your instincts, deciding to gift your friend a fancy bottle of wine despite having zero knowledge about it.

You were never quite the fan of wine. According to you, the seemingly alcoholic drink was too expensive, plus the etiquettes that came along for its consumption would always just make your turn your head away every time you laid your eyes across one. You schemed through the white shelves filled with different tastes and colors of wine, each hailing from various corners of the world. “How do I even spell it?” You crouched down a bit to a bottle that had caught your attention, the exquisite name was starting to make your head hurt. It’s probably a white wine you thought, the transparent color of the liquid was what made you convince. But something rather nostalgic caught your sight, before you could even realize, you found your fingertips caressing the cold glass bottle of the red liquid that you held now.

“If were to be a drink, then what would I be?” You lazily laid sprawled across the couch in the living, while you boyfriend who sat on the marble floor across fumbles with the knotted bunch of cables. Jaehyun had his gaze focus of the wire maze in his hands, eyebrows furrowed and lips pouted in immense concentration.

“Peach milk,” he smiled, unbeknownst to you he was actually implying a double meaning for his answer.

“And why that?” You felt his choice a bit amusing, not really expecting that as an answer.

“Because I love your ass and boobs,” he winked, only to be hit by a pillow that was resting beneath your curled legs. Jaehyun felt himself giggling by your reaction, it was cute to see you being annoyed. “Babe, c’mon. I can’t lie about it.”

“Never mind, just forget it.” You started to get a bit pissed, hurt as well because your sensitive ass thought he would probably say something sweet that would make you heart flutter.

“Peach milk is my favorite, that’s the main reason why,” Jaehyun shifted his focus back to the cables, the last two knots were too adamant to let go of each other. You felt yourself smiling, too wide, he definitely knew you well. Cheeky bastard.

“What about me?” he asked, eyes still focused as he working on untying the last knot.

“Hmmm...” you shifted your position on the couch, now sitting up as you stared your boyfriend’s figure for a short while.

“Red wine.” sophisticated, classy, unique, warm. If you were to describe the aura around him, these would be the first choices.

However, your answer seemed to have caught Jaehyun’s attention, pausing in his tracks as he got curious as to why the specific choice. He had a huge grin on his face, he adored how you remembered the specific detail of red wine being his favourite, for he mentioned it in your first date which was 2 years back. But he knew there was more to it. He knew you too well. “But why red wine?”

You kept your gaze fixated on Jaehyun as he gets up from the ground, putting the cables in a secure manner to avoid another tie war. He hugged the pillow tight which you had previously thrown on him, before propping down beside you on the couch with a tired sigh, looking at you intently. It was as if you both were having a staring contest. So you rested your head on your right hand, both staring each other with soft smiles before you continued.

“You are much more to what everyone thinks you are,” you notice how Jaehyun cocks an eyebrow, still staring and trying to process what you just said.

“Just like wine, the more I know you, the more I know just how amazing you are. Both sweet and sour, but the balanced ratio of it is what makes you more admirable.” You admired how he was always able to balance things out, prior to what everyone believes about him, he had both good and bad sides to him. And that’s what made him more human, him acknowledging his flaws. That’s what made you fall for him.

Hearing you, Jaehyun thought he might dislocate his jaw anytime soon for smiling so hard. His heart started to do all sort of flips, ears starting to pink. It was at times like this when you don’t need words to express how you were feeling, silent but the communication was still present. Jaehyun slides his hand into yours, you glanced at both of your intertwined fingers before looking at him, his eyes full of hearts for you. You giggled, feeling shy at his intense stare but returning him the same way.

“I love you,” he whispered, his starry eyes which were only looking at you.

“Excuse me miss,” You jolt at the sudden change of voice coming from behind you. You whip around, a girl probably in her late teens stood nervously, her hands fidgets with the belts of her backpack.

“Miss, you were kinda in the way so..” you felt flustered for absent-mindedly drifting into your dreamland while shopping for your friend, chiding yourself mentally in the process.

“Ah, I am so sorry,” you moved swiftly to the side to allow the teen some space to carry out her shopping. “Please, carry on.” You smiled softly. Though at the back of your mind you wanted to point out how she shouldn’t be consuming alcohol, but disregarded the urge nonetheless. Sometimes children should get to enjoy their minimal amount of fun in their youth too. You were still clutching the red wine bottle in your hand, eyeing it one last time before placing it back in the racks. You cleared your throat, as if to let the voices speaking inside your head know that you are not a stupid 20 year old anymore. You shake your head, glancing around to inspect if others were judging your state before proceeding to the counter for the random wine you picked which might have cost you half of your monthly salary. It’s okay to spend once in a while.

Mark was literally running around his apartment. Running. His head shot up as he remembered something. “Shit, fuck, are the bathroom lights okay?” he murmured to himself, sprinting off to the bathroom that was located in his vast living room first, followed by the ones in his bedroom and guestroom. Mark was still a newbie to the norms of living alone, him being a newborn living-alone man for sparsely 2 months. And he would barely be home due to his schedules. There were even times he would just forget his own bedroom.

“What else, what else,” he glanced over the whole area eyes drifting here and there before he realized something. Dumbass forgot to check if there were even enough food for two. Mark quickly scurried to the kitchen counter, the utensils were more than enough before checking his fridge. Beers? Check. Soju? Check. Kimchi? Check. Slices of chicken breast? Check. But the 33 year old still felt something was missing. Mark shifted his focus on the wooden shelf that was just above the kitchen sink, the transparent glass door of it making a creak sound as he opened it. For an apartment who’s owner was barely home, the shelf was definitely well packed and organized. It contained all sorts of ramen, tteokbokki and any other fast food you could name. “What else, what else, what else, what else,” he kept chanting, as if by some magic his chants of short memory would be heard and he would know what else was he missing out. He hunched over the lower shelf to inspect if all the sauces his housekeeper stores for him were present there. Absorbed in his thoughts, Mark did not notice the sudden sound of his bell going off, before the sounds just got repeated and even more louder.

“What the fuck?” his eyebrows creased in annoyance, cussing out all the profanities he had in his vocabulary at the visitor’s insolent mannerism. Mark was beyond pissed, the person behind the other side of the door not only disrupted his memory battle but also had the audacity to ring the bell like a 3 year old in the middle of the night. Instead of just answering from the intercom, he directly opened the entrance door. “Look, it’s like 11 in the night - Hyung?” Mark halted his rant session as he realized it was Jaehyun standing in front of his house. Covered in black shirt, black mask, black pants - black everything, it would take a while for others who did not know him personally to recognize the member of the top boy group in the industry.

“Were you shitting or something,” Jaehyun smiled before casually giving his best friend a hug. Mark pulls out some of the spare slippers he had stored, while Jaehyun sits on the wooden step as he unties the knots of his black adidas. As Jaehyun get ups, he looks over to the other male standing in front of him, then down at the slippers and then again to the male.

“What?” Mark laughed, his hands shifting to the sides of his waist.

“Mark, please don’t go shopping by yourself next time,” Jaehyun silently judged Mark for offering him the fluffly colourful pink body and yellow polka dots slippers, similar to the ones he was wearing but the combination in opposite.

“I got them from the BOGO offer going on in the supermarket just down the lane,” Mark wiggled his toes under the furry layer of clothing, slightly humming at the texture. “Bro this shit comfortable and cute, you can’t deny that.”

Jaehyun gives him another look, amused at how his bandmate’s old habits were still the same. “I help you out with your fashion choices next time. Don’t worry.” He patted Mark’s should, a sympathetic grin on his face as he anticipated the other male’s dramatic reaction.

“Oh please,” Mark scoffed. “More like you need my and Johnny hyung’s assistance for your monotonous wardrobe!”

Jaehyun laughed at his friend’s rebuttal before lazily propping himself on the bean sack in the living room with a low hum. Oddly enough, Mark’s apartment felt more homely than his own apartment which was just above a few floors.

“But what brings you here?” Mark walks over to his fridge, judging by his friend’s sudden visit, he knew drinks had become a necessary part of the night. “And what about Hayoung?”

“What about her?” Jaehyun raised his eyebrow at Mark, skillfully catching the beer Mark had tossed to him after asking about Hayoung, Jaehyun’s, well complicated girl something.

“I though you guys might just....I don’t know, be official or something.” Mark stole a glance towards his friend, nervously opening his can. The momentary pin drop silence was an indicator, he indeed blurted something he should not have. The fizzy hiss of the beer can being opened barely broke the ice.

“I don’t do things like official,” Jaehyun scoffed, producing a low sigh after sipping the beer. Mark decided not to further press his friend, despite having an old unresolved grudge against Jaehyun somewhere deep within him. It had been years since all of that had happened, but he still felt hostility creep up inside every time he remembers that night, that week, that month. After all, it was you that Jaehyun had completely broken, torn and ripped apart.

Unbeknownst to the rummaging thoughts inside the mind of his bandmate, it took a while for the older to realize how oddly clean and organized the apartment looked. Jaehyun turned to Mark, eyebrows raised with mischievousness coating his words. “You having someone for the night tomorrow?”

Mark almost made a disgusted face but instead opted to scrunch. “Bro, I don’t have Tinder, neither do I wanna be a carrier of STDs.” Mark placed his empty can on the small glass table, simultaneously letting out a tired huff. Jaehyun almost took an offense to the statement, the attack was definitely but indirectly made towards him. But he decided to shrug it off, Mark was not lying after all. Jaehyun did not even know half of the girls’ names he had slept with, someday or another mixing up names which ends in him getting kicked out or being cursed out. That was what had happened that night as well.

“Okay, I forgot. Hayoung, yes. Speak.” Jaehyun shot an incredulous look to the younger, as if he was able to read his mind or something. Mark only furrowed his eyebrows at the reaction.

“I-I....got kicked out,” Jaehyun’s voice was barely above a whisper, but the sharp eared male was able to catch his friend’s low murmur. Mark stifled his giggle, only to receive a glare from his friend. Jaehyun ran his fingers through his newly dyed lilac hair. Fucking embarrassing.

“But what made her do that?”

Jaehyun felt chills run down his spine as the scenario replayed in his head. He shivered despite the heater being on, an amused Mark glancing while chugging down the small remaining amount of beer. Mark was being a gentleman trying to conceal his laughter as Jaehyun rambled how he managed to fuck up yet another good hook-up buddy. At this point, Mark was not even surprised. Victim to his obvious facial expressions, Mark hated lying, and equally hated being lied to as well. Jaehyun side glanced his friend, a loud annoyed snort escaping from him. “Having fun, aren’t you?”

“Well, I mean it’s fun — sorry,” Mark clears his throat. He should be the type of friend who gives advices instead of laughing. Mark wiggled in his seat, distorting the empty can before having a perfect shot in the trashcan just a few feet away from him. Smooth one.

“I think I might retire, or just quit after the current contract ends,” Jaehyun felt tight, the words came out from him in a way too suffocating form. Mark visibly tenses, his laidback posture now crouching forward to his friend. Mark was too pre-occupied in his escalating solo career, the support he had been getting even before the official stage was way too much for him to fathom, but he was grateful for it nonetheless. A stinging guilt crept up inside him, chiding himself of being such an inconsiderate friend. “It’s high-time I start to live on my own accord.”

Mark decided to rather not pressurize the half-drunk dude with his numerous questions as to why or what has made him to take such a step. Jaehyun struggled to keep his eyes open, exhaustion was taking over his body ever faster now that he had booze in his system. Jaehyun would have rather opted to just spend the night on the couch (he preferred Mark’s limited edition long L shaped sofa over any king sized bed) but the guy decided to not get welcomed by his mate as ‘good morning.’ Mark put a hand on Jaehyun’s knee, an attempt to stop the non-stop stomping which was a very well-known drunk habit of him. Piling the blankets he just brought, the younger warned again, eyes like red lazer lights before trudging towards his bedroom.

Feet wobbly, Jaehyun struggles to drag his build to switch off the remaining lights in the living room, glancing throughout the long empty space. He gulped down harshly, the familiar empty feeling creeping back to him which he had been avoiding for so long — for years. Jaehyun took a deep sigh, the heavy feeling feeling weighing down his chest as he took light steps towards the big glass window which granted him the view of the whole city. His eyes flickered at the luminous sight. He felt big but small, full, content but numb and empty.

“Hyung, you’re still awake?” a sleepy voice spoke from behind, breaking out Jaehyun from his trance.

“Huh?” It took a moment for him to process an answer. “Uh yeah. just like that. You go sleep.”

Mark shrugged, walking towards his bed as Jaehyun plopped down harshly on the duvet, wincing slightly as he felt a sprain in his lower back. With the alcohol slowly losing its effect on him with each passing second, Jaehyun started to feel more sober, more drawn back into the reality. He hated it. This feeling he was feeling.

Mark was having a rather difficult time to fall asleep. He even put on a random sleeping eye mask he uses for travelling, but alas that did not help either. He was too giddy, too excited for tomorrow. Pulling up the blankets over his head, Mark was assured he was safe from everyone, even maybe from God as a huge grin breaks out on his face. As much as he hates to admit it, Mark loved how things turned out to be the way they were.

“Oh god, this is so awkward. Oh god can I please please just die already?” Mark halted on his steps at the voice, glistening in sweats after the recent stage. He thought it would be an adventure to opt for the public washroom in disguise since the green rooms’ ones were all occupied by the rest of the members; and boy, Mark was really giving his all hold his pee.

“OH GOD!” the sudden yelp caused the male to shriek quietly, muttering an inaudile ‘jesus’. Despite the odds, Mark decided not to test his luck, holding in the bubbling feeling just before explosion as much as he could. Muttering quiet curses, the male struggled to hold his posture as he stealthily tried to get to the other side of the stairs. Too busy in his on the way to urination voyage, Mark realized it was too late, he bumped. Bumped into someone. A girl. Hell yeah fucked. Panic crept at the back of his throat as he anticipated what was coming forth. Him being surrounded by numerous fan as he desperately tries to hold his pee. What a fucking sight.

“Look, I know you might be a staff or something,” Mark whipped his head at your voice. “But please just oh god,” you rambled, leaving the man standing with his legs crossed tightly in utter confusion. “I had no idea — Mark Lee?”

The colors from his faced drained, Mark turned casper for a split second.

“PLEASE!” he was quick to react, half-whispering as he desperately caught your hands. “Please don’t just, uh.., shout or something.”

You immediately raised your hands in defense. “I uh have no reason to do so?” You stated, observing how he was literally squirming, it did not take you long to understand that the canadian needed to go the washroom as soon as possible. ”Oh!” You quickly moved. “Sorry for blocking your way!” Before he could even say thank you, you disappeared without any trace. Mark made a quick mental note to thank you, well that only if he ever happens to cross paths with you again. And deep down, he wised he would. On the other hand, you let out another distressed growl, promising to all of the heavens that never will you be ever accompanying your cousin sister, or let alone come to any concerts from now on. The stunt your drunken cousin had pulled just a while ago was humiliating enough, but of course, she had to spice it up by vomiting on the hallways just in front of the green room. You silently prayed and hope with all your might that maybe they will be generous enough not to sue you or ask for compensation for the mess, looking around cautiously for any employees before you sprinted off for the exit door, and yes, dragging the passed out stunt lady.

Mark felt as if he had a halo above his head, the water balloon inside him finally set free. But he had to race when he saw his phone buzzing with notifications, all of them belonging to his manager or the group chat of the members chanting same syllables ‘Where are you’ ‘show starts in 2′ ‘get yo ass here’. It did not take the rapper too while before he reached the green room, the makeup artists and stylists immediately wrapping themselves around him with brushes and hair sprays. He was smiling, genuinely smiling as he replayed the encounter he just had. Johnny raised an eyebrow with an amused grin on his face.

“What’s with the smile, bro?” Johnny pulls up some random exercises to relieve the tension in his muscles.

Instead of dodging his question, Mark replied, still smiling, but wider. “The pee voyage was a nice one.”

Johnny judged the younger for a second before chuckling and heading towards the stage. The loud noises from the fans echoed throughout the whole arena, full of green lightsticks gleeming like blossoming spring garden. No wonder I called them grass, Mark thought. But today, he was looking for a rather specific individual, his eye scanning almost all the faces in the crowd. He hoped to see you again, smiling gleefully as he performed, but thought that it was too greedy of him to want this much in a span of a day. And so he performed, for the first time without any pressure of doing good, enjoying every moment of the stage he was on and yet again, wished that maybe, maybe your paths will collide with his again.

part 2

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ibijau · 4 years

Text

The modern xisangyao I’ve been talking about yay /o/ also on AO3 (and big thanks to the xisang discord for listening to my ramblings a while back + providing a lot of ideas for this!)

Lan Xichen hangs the phone and slumps against the back of his office chair. It is unusual enough to catch the attention of his assistant who looks up from his laptop with a concerned noise.

"Something wrong?" Mo Xuanyu asks

Lan Xichen nods weakly. "It was a fake after all."

Mo Xuanyu immediately understands what he means, and relaxes upon learning it is something he wouldn't count as important. To Lan Xichen though, it is devastating. That painting has been all he's been thinking about for weeks at this point. A lost Nie Huaisang resurfacing is always exciting for the very small circle of people who care about these things. And Lan Xichen cares, of course.

He wrote his thesis on the master, and he has a deal for a book so more people can learn about that forgotten genius. He has been called the leading expert on the Tang era scholar, though it isn't hard when hardly anyone else bothers with him.

That's why when 'Winter moonlight in Qinghe', long thought lost to a fire early in the last century, resurfaced on the market, the buyer turned to Lan Xichen to ensure that it is the real deal. It is well known that there's a staggering number of fake Nie Huaisang paintings out there. One of many oddities about the man’s work, since his fame never rose high enough to be so eagerly copied by other artists of all periods, and his paintings have rarely sold for a price that would justify the attention of skilled forgers.

Lan Xichen is also trying to write a paper on that, when his book and teaching leave him the time.

It had been a treat to behold 'Winter moonlight in Qinghe'. There are no known copies of that one, only descriptions which do not do it justice. Lan Xichen could have cried at those delicate lines, fraught with inexplicable melancholy, like a last goodbye to a beloved home. 'Winter moonlight' is the last known work of Nie Huaisang before he dropped off the record, well into his eighties or possibly his nineties, and Lan Xichen did get a sense of finality upon seeing it. It wasn't just a painting, it was a farewell.

As to its authenticity, Lan Xichen had no doubt at the time. The lines, the subject, the sense of light and darkness, everything was perfectly fitting with the master's other works. It really had to be the lost masterpiece, the culmination of a great artist’s life. Lan Xichen had only recommended further analysis to confirm it, certain that it was the true 'Winter moonlight'.

The painting's owner has just called to explain that the paper is too young by a few centuries.

Lan Xichen is distraught to say the least. It's not that he is above mistakes, he is only human after all, but he was convinced that this painting was real.

It's the thing with Nie Huaisang though. Not only has he attracted many counterfeiters over the centuries, they are always forgers of rare talent.

"Well, that's disappointing," Mo Xuanyu agrees, more out of politeness than anything else. "Not really surprising though. How many fakes does it make this year?"

"Three. No, two, 'man with rabbits' was tested last month and confirmed as being authentic after all. He painted that one in his youth so his style wasn't quite settled yet, but the paper and ink are right and it does look exactly like that copy they have in Beijin."

Mo Xuanyu rolls his eyes, and turns back to his laptop.

"I don't know why anyone bothers with that guy's paintings," he huffs, having never shared Lan Xichen's passion for the artist. "Most of the ones we have are fake."

"The estate sale that got us those two fakes also produced several confirmed ones," Lan Xichen protests mildly. “It’s a shame 'Winter moonlight in Qinghe' turned out to be fake, but apparently ‘Mountains longing for snow’ has been confirmed as real, even if it didn’t sell. I’d give anything to have a look at that one too.”

Mo Xuanyu, who clearly lost interest in the conversation the instant he realised it was about an artist Lan Xichen has heard him describe as mediocre at best, turns his full attention back to his laptop when he sound warns him he has a new message.

“Then do that,” he mutters without conviction. “Go have a look or something.”

Lan Xichen stops breathing for a second, and stares at his assistant as if Mo Xuanyu had just handed him the key to the secret of the universe.

It is always a little awkward to contact owners of paintings once they are in private collections, and Lan Xichen has learned the hard way to avoid it. Some collectors are rather defensive, and a few don't want it publicised that they own rare art. But surely the antiquarian who currently holds those works wouldn’t mind letting him have a look? His interest in them, if publicised, could certainly create a ‘buzz’ of some sort in the small community of Nie Huaisang enthusiasts. It is for that sort of things that his little brother has convinced him to get a social media presence after all, so why not use it to his advantage?

Already recovering from his disappointment over 'Winter moonlight in Qinghe', Lan Xichen gets to work and starts looking for information about whoever currently holds those unsold paintings. It takes a surprisingly long while, but he eventually discovers that the series of paintings was bought by a man named mister Shanzi, apparently after the death of their former owner whose identity has not been revealed.

It is not the first time Lan Xichen encounters the name Shanzi. The man is a reputed antiquarian and art dealer. Part of his reputation comes from rarely ever being fooled by fakes and copies, and for often being the one to spot lost works from obscure artists. If mister Shanzi was fooled by 'Winter moonlight in Qinghe', then Lan Xichen feels a little better for his own mistake. The copy really had to be excellent.

The problem with mister Shanzi being involved is that he is not an easy man to contact. In this digital age, mister Shanzi is an art dealer without an online presence of any sort, though after some probing, Lan Xichen learns from one auction house that in recent years mister Shanzi has hired an assistant, and that young man is slightly less elusive than his employer. Not by much though, and it takes all of Lan Xichen’s persuasion and good reputation to obtain the email of that assistant.

It would be an understatement to say that the assistant in question is unhappy to have had his contact leaked to a stranger. The first email Lan Xichen gets in answer to his painfully polite enquiry is probably the most passive-agressive thing he has ever beheld, and that includes family dinner with his father and his mother’s new girlfriend.

If it were earlier in his career, if he were a few years younger, Lan Xichen would have given up at that point, fearful to disturb. But he’s learned to fight for what he wants when it is needed, and what he wants, right now, is a chance to look at paintings he will otherwise never see unless by some miracle a museum in the country buys them… and he knows how unlikely that is. Nie Huaisang doesn’t attract the crowds and academics.

Not yet, anyway. Lan Xichen’s book will change that.

And the more of Nie Huaisang’s work he gets to see with his own eyes, the easier that book will be to write.

So Lan Xichen replies to that unpleasant email with an essay detailing his hopes of attracting attention to his work, the possibility that prices might rise in the future, but above all his interest in an artist who deserves to be admired along with more famous names.

To his surprise, it works.

Mister Shanzi’s assistant’s reply states that he also has deep admiration for the forgotten master, and that his employer has a private collection of Nie Huaisang’s works. He is unsure whether mister Shanzi would be willing to show those, since they are stored in his own home, but perhaps an arrangement could be made. Hopefully, Lan Xichen might agree to meet in a few days at a café near the university where he works, so that they can more easily discuss what he would need for his book.

Lan Xichen readily agrees, and the day of their meeting cannot come soon enough.

When it does come, at last, Lan Xichen is almost half an hour early at the café. He tries, at first, to grade some essays from a class he teaches, but quickly finds that he cannot focus on that at the moment. It is ridiculous to be so nervous over this, he’s met with plenty of antiquarians and art dealers before, he’s been invited to check private collections as well, but on that late afternoon, his skin is buzzing with excitement, as if he were on the verge of something extraordinary.

That excitement spikes up when an elegant young man enters the café, browsing the table with searching eyes, only to smile when he spots Lan Xichen. The young man, who might be one of the most beautiful people Lan Xichen has ever seen, quickly gives him a short bow.

“You must be Lan Xichen?” he asks.

Lan Xichen can only nod, and gestures to invite the gorgeous stranger to sit across from him.

"I'm mister Shanzi’s assistant,” the other man says as he takes a seat. “Meng Yao, at your service."

#xisang #xiyao #lan xichen #jin guangyao #mdzs #jau writes #counterfeit au

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noxyfied · 3 years

Photo

This, is Noxy/Noxyfied/Nox. This is the character I identify as online, and I want to tell you my story with this adorable Arctic Fox because it is one heck of a tale from not so long ago

Things did begin rough at the beginning of my persona’s history. I honestly can’t recall how I came up with it, only how I inserted my love for something and went with it.

From the early years of 2017 to 2019 I was all paper and pencil. Ah yes traditional art was my big thing for a couple of years during that era of 2013 to 2020. I had a time where I wrote stories about characters I made, and not much. No fan art, no nothing, I wanted to stick to my own original ideas at first before I took the step to do something that I did not own; it was a weird mindset I know, I couldn’t hold myself to want to be original and develop to be good enough to draw other things.

It took me some time to develop, hell even to this day I still am unsure of my own skills but I enjoyed trying new things. I don’t reject much criticism even if it comes harsh it still lingers in my head when received anyway. I needed someone to identify as online, a persona who I would have an identity through as I was moving forward on this hopeful career I want to make with my art.

Idea #1 draw my own self accurate to how I look

Scratch that...

Nononono, I am too bad at showing my face, even at that I don’t like myself.

So I had to come up with something else, 2019 was ending with my skills rising up to something neat. I had Fire alpaca and a wacom cheap tablet which I used time to time back then, and with how I moved foward I said “why not, lets draw a glaceon.

Not bad, not bad. I do enjoy anthropomorphic animals, and for a anthro Glaceon it wasn't so bad. Even back then I did not enjoy much of this picture but the idea sparked. I did roleplay around online a lot as a Glaceon. People always had referred to me as a Glaceon when talking, because furry friends tend to be like that and I don’t mind. It had definitely sparked the idea of identifying as one for my persona.

I had a hard time how I would draw this character, a more personalized Glaceon with my own flare of the art style I carry should be nice, should I make it tall? short? anthro? feral? the questions rose up. Even more as time passed, took some time unsure of it, Unluckily I had a Glaceon FURsona, not a persona. (Yes those were two separate things as I carried 7 fursonas as individual characters in their own stories).

But soon one day in class, my artsy self was bored and it just sparked.

This is it! yes! I love it! something about this just clicked for some reason, it was like nothing I had seen before I could not look away at it, this was it.

After class I went home and played some games. The idea was there but man am I tired. Things did go slow, but not for long as of January, the classes I took gave me the ability to better understand this Adobe Photoshop, an amazing tool for editing pictures but also... To draw?!? I have heard of using Photoshop to draw but was amazed to have the ability using such program. During my time 2019 I would doodle around on Photoshop in my school or at home (thanks to the campus giving me a cheaper prize to use it for assignments) Not bad, not bad, the program was for sure something nice to use. Look! I even drew my Fursonas there too, ain’t that nice

2019 was something for sure. It had just begun making 2020 quite the year as I took my wacom tablet, opened Photoshop, and on January there it was.

Oh how cute! I felt so proud of myself, firealpaca was nothing like how clean and pretty Photoshop was, I was amazed at this ability.

“I made this?” that would be what I ask myself everyday. Time to time I would, and still, look at my phone to my drawings and remember what I used to make some pieces, I will not forget how I used thick outlines with the line too from photoshop, added some depth on the eyes. But most importantly, I had a persona, and I introduced it

My friends loved it, I could not believe I am starting to do the shift, my days of traditional art were at a halt. Not at a complete stop since I do use traditional art for a few other things of course, this was just my main focus now.

This little creature was everything to me, cute, easy to make, helped me throughout a few months as I practiced with my digital art.

I also perfected it’s look, but something looked rather familiar about it. Could not put my finger to it, so I went on drawing it.

that was a few exceptions where I shifted the proportions for “it”

“It” “it” what was this thing supposed to be, I myself was unsure how to identify myself with this persona. Male? no, female? no. The issue was there, who am I really inside, who was my persona gonna be.

I still cannot tell you exactly what my persona was for the longest time. I at times felt lost and confused with my identity, it did not help that 2020 did its mumbo jumbo and a pandemic happened, it was a lot of time on my own at home just questioning really who I had been for the longest time. Classes were minimal so my free time was big around April and May.

I was always unsure of who I was exactly, through my early years late 2000′s I had in me that my body was uncomfortable for looking the way it did, 2010′s went silent but there was something in me I did not understand. why did I feel this way, why do I feel as I am not happy with who I am, and who I identify with.

This persona was the wake up call to who I really wanted to be. I saw it in me that I knew being a male was the main issue in me feeling unhappy. Throughout my life I did not enjoy masculinity as much as other kids, yeah I had some boy traits but it was rather minimal, I enjoyed other things more. I enjoyed a lot of things about being female it was something I had never seen before. as hard or confusing things tend to be from me to explain, its a rather hard thing for myself to explain. But that how it felt “confusing” I researched and looked for things and to my conclusion I had come to be, I come to identify as a MtF trans.

I felt relieved in me of it and I already enjoyed my days more after from it. The only issue is “who do I tell..?” I was timid to tell this to anyone, friends or even family. Especially family, those I come to admit they will never be told of what my decision was because of how hard headed they are. It is a tragic story to tell since most families are such closed minded people of rejecting others.

“My friends tho, my friends? I would feel bad if I told them” that was the mindset I had for a while before admitting to them time to time, one by one. This was a chapter in my life that had changed me early 2020′s but I felt a lot of joy in me to be who I wanted to be, I no longer took anyone else's guidance for controlling who I am, I just went with my own flow.

My persona was.... more comically confused, it could be either so I just left it how my mood wanted it to go for when drawing it. So, things went well, in 2019 with the money I got I found myself enjoying a lot of second handed games, with a game coming real soon that had me pumped for I had to get a console I wanted for so long

A PS4 for the the Final fantasy 7 Remake, I was so pumped waiting for the game, I got a used PS4 for it and even bought couple other games for it to get to know the console: Final fantasy 15, destiny, and later on this Persona 5 game a lot of people talked about. Hmm ok, well lets try it out and oh me oh my, a few days later:

The art style captivated me, can you tell I went all out to trying anything with my persona? I cannot believe I was my own guinea pig for these sorts.

Going around some friends and they will tell you that I used this pfp quite a lot back then, as well as updating it with a new oc I had come up with

A tale in due time will be told about this gal.

well, it was set and forth that this was me, my persona, this glaceon was who I was. People loved it, my friends really liked it, and I had a blast having this first pure year of digital art only. Meeting new friends, and admiring their art. Having old friends come back, and even losing a few others on the way. During the time of june, to July I was rapid about drawing my persona in many ways, short, tall, anthro, feral

even metallic.

But there come some time I did not grew tired of. But a little worried that I had to rely on a franchise for my own identity, of course there is nothing wrong for those doing it. But reflecting on myself, back then when I wanted this art career to happen, I wanted to go all out letting out my imagination with my own creations. I had to make the decision, it was time to move on...

...To a new art program and new drawing tablet

No, it wasn’t that. I had to branch out from this Glaceon, but keep my identity, my legacy of this persona in check, but with a new coat of paint of course. did not take a long time before choosing that I had to use a real life animal as inspiration for this change. Something at least close to it, ah yes of course! the inspiration of the Glaceon was an arctic fox, well those are some good stepping stones to begin with so what happened one day is that I began sketching, not before saying good bye to this old self that helped me begin. It was weird, this is me but it was old me?

Tested the new Brushes from this amazing program called Clip studio paint, and I gotta say I love the program. Sincerely the best choice I made to leave Photoshop for this.

At last, this is it. the new Me!

Familiar looking isn’t it,baby steps we can say.

I cannot blame the people for calling my new persona a “Glaceon-alike”

I headed to the right direction stepping away from it, but it was hard to let go

new program, new tablet, new me. the later half of 2020 went onto a lot of changes with myself, the chibi small version did not make me happy to make anymore, I was losing the touch and with the few comments I got of looking like a “powerpuff girl look a like” did set me off to do a drastic change I am thankful to do. This new me had some weird phases, don’t we all tho?

where else to brainstorm than back to the traditional old ways. Now, you may see this and ask what was I thinking when making this. the order of when i started and finish goes as: Top right: ok what if it was feral, nah nah scratch. Top left: Can I still make it cute with a round face and features I had from before? ew no! that looks scary Bottom right: lets make it more natural and wow hey! yes yes yes! this looks hundred times better. Bottom left: It is time I go all out and make it humanoid, it was how I found myself enjoying drawing most things but still did some anthropomorphic things. I was just not the best of it.

Back to digital and.... Amazing, I really out did myself this time, lets go for it, lets keep going with this

I even got a cool sword too!

My practice continued from here, the second half was great and fun. New persona got me in a place where I was happy with and through October and December I was having a blast with the more possibilities with it. I went on to practice with even more suggestive things after a life drawing class I took, proportions mattered to me and with this new persona I went out to make more better looking proportions that were attractive and stylish.

This persona was great, and I managed to make so much of it. even Drawing the more suggestive stuff had left me with an answer for this persona. Just make it gender fluid, my selection for this character being male or female made me so tired I did not know why I just made it gender fluid since the beginning. My mood swings for this character, and I can’t resist drawing it either way. Was I finished? of course not, this persona still had some work around to do. The hair became a pain to make to keeping up with consistently.

2020 ended, with a year of exciting new things coming for this new year. I went through quite a lot in my life and my art career took a shaken with this new digital life style, my persona became the identity I saw myself through, something im happy with drawing to represent Me.

That isn’t to say that I gave up on drawing Me Me.

I drew who I hope to be, and will use this from time to time, nothing fancy but something.

It has been a year already since I began identifying myself with this persona from last year from now. ever since I sketched that doodle in class, it has been a happy trip through memory lane writing it and I am happy how things turned out. 2021 is what I hope to be as good as 2020 was (by that I mean drawing only of course) In 2021 one more change was made that had made me just as happy to continue on with.

I got more hair! as crazy as it is yes. More hair, and a different front style has been to this day what I been using.

I even made a discord emoji for all the warm hugs to have with my fursona!

and my first ever animation I have ever done before!!

I am always experimenting new things, and i’m proud to be an artists to go out there and leave my art out there to be noticed by anyone. The love and appreciation friends and others leave me are the best thing I could ask. I look foward to see what is up ahead, for me, my career, and Noxy.

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bisou-doux · 3 years

Text

Preview to my Hunger Games/Harry Potter crossover (OC x Fred Weasley)

Warnings (NOT 18+ but please don’t read if any of these things make you uncomfortable!!): Blood, knives, knife wound, character death(s), severe injury mention (lost limbs), dead animal mention?? (a rat)

This is the first fic I’ve ever written! I got the idea from a post I saw from @wand3ringr0s3 Comments and criticism are GREATLY appreciated and it’d be really cool to get some feedback on my writing style!! I’ll be posting the rest of the first chapter later today :)

Tagging my lovely mutuals: @ourloveisforthelovely @darthwheezely @amrtxntia @ronweaselysslut @whiz-bangs78 @anchoeritic

Darkness. Pure black. I hear noises coming from somewhere. Muffled. Echoing through the endless void around me. The noises become louder. Someone is talking. The more I listen, the louder and clearer they get. Clear enough that I can almost make out the words. Suddenly, everything goes deafeningly quiet. My ears start ringing. But then, a single voice echoes through the silence, “Seph?”. I recognize it immediately. “Maeve?” I call out. “Seph? Is that you?” she responds, her voice shaky with fear. “Yes, yes, Maeve, it’s me. Where are you?”

“I don’t know.” she responds, panic rising in her voice. “Seph, I’m scared.”

“I know. I know, kiddo,” I swallow hard, “Hey. Hey, listen, I’m gonna find you, okay? Just stay calm.”

My heart is racing. I look around for some sort of clue, but nothing but complete darkness surrounds me. I tentatively reach my hand out in front of me. My fingertips graze something. Something cold. I take a step forward and reach out again. My hand finds what feels like a thin chain. I roll it around in my fingers before pulling down on it. The space is immediately flooded with blinding white light. I blink a few times to adjust my eyes to the sudden brightness. I’m at home; a tiny one room flat that I share with my mother, sister, and our cat. Except it’s empty- no furniture, not even a door. I see my sister standing a few feet in front of me, her hands bound together by a thick rope. “Maeve!” I rush towards her. “Seph!” she cries. As I reach out to hug her I’m pushed back by an invisible force. I look up and there she is- standing inside a giant glass dome. I take a few steps back, trying to register what I’m seeing.

“Shall we draw the names?” I whip my head around to see a woman in a magenta frock standing on the other side of the room. Her dress is covered in so many frills and flounces that she takes up half the flat. On her head is a ridiculous blonde wig that must add at least two feet to her height. Her face is covered entirely in white powder, with her cheeks overly rouged, and her top lip painted magenta to match the dress. She looks like a very posh clown.

“I-I’m sorry what?”

She laughs airily, “The names, darling. Surely you remembered?”

“Remember what?”

She tsked then pulled out two smaller versions of the glass dome from the frills at the front of her dress. They each had a small slip of paper in them. “Go on. Pick one.” Her voice was incredibly high-pitched, and she spoke with a capitol accent. I stepped towards her and hesitantly reached into the bowl in her right hand. I unfolded the slip of paper, ‘Maeve Whitlock’. I stared at the name in confusion.

“I don’t understand.”

“Will you take her fate as your own?”

“What do you mean? What fate?”

The woman let out another laugh, this one high and cold, it echoed around the entire room and caused the floor to shake. Suddenly, I heard Maeve call out to me, “SEPH!” I looked back to where she was in the dome. There was a dark, shadowy figure standing behind her, holding a knife to her neck. Her hands and feet were bound to a small wooden chair, and her mouth was now gagged with a dishcloth. I ran towards the dome, panic rising further in my chest. “MAEVE!” I shouted desperately. She looked at me fearfully, tears rolling slowly down her cheeks. I banged and kicked and rammed my body at the glass so hard, I should’ve shattered something. But it was no use. I looked back to where the woman had been standing, but she was gone. The shadowy figure stood still, holding the knife to my sister’s neck.

“LET GO OF HER YOU FREAK!” I cried, banging my fists against the dome. Maeve was panicking now, her chest rising and falling rapidly, tears running down her face, her muffled pleas penetrating through the glass. “MAEVE.” I cried out; my voice cracked as the salty tears streamed down my cheeks. But I was too late. The dark figure suddenly slashed the knife across her throat, her cries stopped and she slumped down into her seat, eyes still half open, blood now seeping into her blouse. “NO!” I screamed, sinking down to the ground. The glass squeaked as my hands dragged down over the exterior. I looked back up towards the shadowy figure, only to see it was no longer there. In its place I saw myself, a satisfied smile on my face. I heard the clownish woman’s disembodied laugh echo through the flat, “What a pity,” the voice said, “you could’ve saved her! But now, I’m afraid, you must face the consequences of your actions.” The clone slowly raised the hand still holding the knife, and pointed directly at me. Suddenly, I felt the cool touch of metal against my throat. The other me winked, and I felt the blade drag deep across my neck. I started to choke, the blood pooling into my airways. I instinctively brought my hand up to the wound. My vision started turning black around the edges. I looked down to see the front of my dress already soaked in red. The last thing I saw was my own hand, holding the knife, droplets of blood falling steadily from the tip of the blade. Then, everything went dark.

My eyes shot open. All I saw was fur, and something was blocking my breathing. I sat up quickly, and the ball of fluff leapt off my face. The cat looked up at me from his new place on my lap- those big amber eyes practically staring into my soul- and meowed loudly. I sighed in annoyance. “Stupid cat.” I grumbled as I lifted him up and let him jump to the floor. I rubbed my eyes and tried to slow my racing heartbeat. My body was covered in a sheen of cold sweat. I looked down at the bed to see my sister still sleeping soundly beside me. I took a deep, shaky breath and stroked the top of her head, moving away some of the stray hairs lying across her face. I glanced over at the digital clock next to me, SUNDAY: JULY 4. 8:26 AM. Today was Reaping Day; no wonder I had that horrible nightmare. This would be my 4th year participating in the drawing, it was Maeve’s first. How unlucky it was that her twelfth birthday had only been three days prior. If she’d just been born a few days later, she could’ve been spared for another year.

I sighed and swung my legs over the side of the bed. My mother was already awake, sewing some buttons back onto Maeve’s school shirt. “Hi, mom.”

“Hi, sweetie. Did you just wake up?”

“Yeah, just now.” I yawned.

“Is Maeve still asleep?”

“Yeah.”

“What time is it?”

“Almost 8:30. Should I wake her up?”

“No, it’s okay,” she sighed, “let her sleep some more. I’ll wake her up soon.” She held up the shirt to examine her work, “Still needs a few more stitches…” She held the needle between her teeth and reached down to her sewing basket to grab another spool of thread. I looked down as I felt the cat’s bushy tail brush past my ankles. I knelt down and scratched behind his ears.

“Did you feed Tulip yet?” I asked. The fluffy, tricolor, flat-faced cat was now sitting at my feet, purring contentedly.

“Didn’t have to; he caught his own breakfast. A huge rat, which he so lovingly dropped on my pillow this morning.” My mother replied.

I stifled a laugh.

“Since you’re already up, go ahead and shower. I’ve laid out your clothes for you on the kitchen table, so when you’re done, just change into them and come back here so I can do your hair. Okay?”

“Okay.”

She smiled at me then went back to her work. I grabbed some soap and a clean towel from the small shelf near the entrance and walked out. “Make sure you don’t use up all the hot water!” she called out as I closed the door behind me. “Don’t worry, I won’t!”.

We didn’t have our own bathroom- there was one toilet and one shower per floor, which could be shared by anywhere from 5 to 20 people. There were 5 apartments on each of the 4 floors- all one room- with one bed, a stove, a sink, a small table and chairs, and some shelves for storage. Each apartment had a heater and air conditioner, but they were never guaranteed to work when you needed them. Sometimes only one side of the building would have heating, or only certain floors had AC, or only specific apartments. Often, the whole building wouldn’t have either for days at a time. The same thing happened with the water and electricity. You could never fully rely on any of the appliances being in working order. As a result, we shared a lot with other apartments. If someone’s stove wasn’t working, they could just knock on a neighbor’s door and use theirs. If only one apartment on our floor had heating during the winter, there were no objections when everyone else would come over and make themselves at home. It made it feel like we were all one family, and it was customary to refer to many of your neighbors as your aunt or uncle. This was common throughout the District, as almost everyone aside from the mayor and peacekeepers lived in small, rundown tenements, expanding outwards from the city center, which was home to the Justice building. Here, in District 8, we produce textiles. There are 6 factories in total; one of which is entirely dedicated to making peacekeeper uniforms. We typically start in the factories at 14, splitting the day between school and work. We aren’t assigned specific jobs until we turn 18. Until then, those in charge of production make requests for certain numbers of workers, and we go wherever we’re needed. Once we finish school, we’re assigned permanent job positions based on both our aptitude tests and our performances in various factory tasks. The better you do on the aptitude test, the better (or at least safer) your job will be. Those with the highest scores tend to be assigned as desk jockeys- where the risk of dying on the job is fairly low. Those with the lowest scores are sent to work in the most dangerous parts of the factories; you can always tell who works there because chances are, they’ve lost some part of their limbs...or face...or they’re, you know, missing a hand...Then there’s those whose scores fall somewhere in the middle; if they have a specific skill, like baking, or perhaps healing, they’re assigned a job based on that. The rest are assigned mid-level factory jobs, which were still dangerous, but the chances of getting to keep all your fingers were significantly higher! (But not guaranteed).

(to be continued...)

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reminiscing-writer · 4 years

Text

Off The Deep End

Warnings: none for this chapter. Starts with fluff, ends with angst. But shits gonna hit the fan lmao

Spencer pulls up the comforters in an attempt to cover his ears from the horrendous alarm that was enveloping his room.

“Make it stop," he grumbled into an empty bed.

"It's been ringing for a little more than an hour now," he heard his favorite voice from the attached bathroom of their bedroom, "it's about time you woke up, don't you think?" She peeked through the doorway, rolling her eyes with a smile at her sleepy husband.

"I have a better idea," Spencer mumbled sleepily.

“Oh?”

"You come into bed with me." He propped himself onto his elbow, barely managing to pry his open. He glanced over to the digital alarm clock on the bedside table which read 6:15 in bright red luminescent lights.

He inhaled a sharp breath slowly sitting up in bed, stretching his arms widely. The covers fell back onto the bed as he stood up and made his way into the bathroom.

"Excuse me," Amelia looked at her husband from the mirror. He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind, resting his head on her shoulder. "Occupied." She giggles as he kisses the nape of her neck.

“Can you join me in the shower?” He asked his wife, looking at her big brown eyes through the mirror.

She turned to face him, smiling sweetly, “I'm already dressed, babe.” She puts on her earrings. “Sorry.” She apologized laughing at his disappointed sigh.

“You don't have to be at work ‘til 8. That's enough time for a second shower.” He rests his forehead against hers. He gives her a look up and down, thanking all the Gods he could think of for giving him an eidetic memory.

Her style was modest and girly. Floral prints and pastel colors. Lots of dresses and skirts (which she loved to twirl and spin in).

She quickly gives him a peck on his stubbly cheek, and squirms her way out his arms. “Get ready quickly. Breakfast will be ready in 20, and I would like to eat with you before I leave for the day.”

Pulling the buttons on his cardigan close, he rushed into the kitchen when he heard the bacon sizzle.

“Lia,” he grumbled, quickly stuffing a few raspberries in his mouth before she could stop him, “you spoil me.” He kisses her cheek.

She gives him a toothy, childlike grin.

She loved being appreciated and praised. It made her feel giddy. And, when she felt like that, she gave this adorable smile, which was one of the many things Spencer loved. Her two front teeth, and side canines displayed themself through her smiling lips.

“Should I do the omelette?” Spence offered as he set the table.

“I was thinking of no eggs today.” She answered, pouring pancake batter onto a second pan. When he gave her a questioning look- eggs being her favorite in the mornings- she just shrugged. “The smell has been setting my stomach off for a few days now.”

After he poured the duo Orange juice, the two quickly ate, cleaned, and rushed out the door. Both said their ‘I love you's’ and parted their separate ways.

Amelia, being a preschool teacher, had very simple hours. From 8am, until 2 in the afternoon. After that, she was home, and usually waiting for her husband's arrival.

Spencer didn't have such a predictable schedule. Sometimes he would come home around 5 in the afternoon. Other times, if he had paperwork he wanted to wrap up, he would stay late till nearly midnight. And, of course, if a case came up, he could be gone for days.

But, regardless, whatever his schedule may be for the day, he always, always, made sure Amelia was aware of it.

Today was no different. She got home from work at about half past two. She had a feeling in her stomach. One of much excitement. A part of her wanted to wait for Spencer to come home, but a bigger part wanted to find out before him. That way, she could surprise him if she was right. And, if she wasn't- well, at least, that way, he wouldn't be disappointed also.

She tossed her handbag onto the couch of her apartment, and made a beeline for the bathroom.

After a total of three minutes, she's on the bathroom floor, one hand over her mouth, her other hand holding tightly onto a plastic stick and her eyes flowing with tears.

Happy tears.

She couldn't believe her eyes. There it was. The pregnancy stick she had bought nearly four months ago, finally in her hands reading exactly what she was hoping for.

Two solid lines, screaming, that she was going to be a mother. She wanted to call Spence straight away. She wanted to scream it off the rooftops and to the world. She wanted to call her best friend, and her mother and sister-

But first, she obviously had to tell her husband. But, not like this. She couldn't say news like this over the phone. No, she had to surprise him.

So, that's exactly what she planned on doing. Very quickly, and very happily, she got to baking. And whisking, and piping. Soon enough, she had a dozen cupcakes baked and frosted.

Some pink with blue sprinkles, some blue with pink sprinkles. She had a few topped with candles which she planned to light right before Spence came home.

Which reminded her-

Amelia paused the music which was blasting from her cell phone, and dialed her significant other.

One ring, two ring , three r-

“Hello?” She heard his voice answer.

“Hey,” she smiled widely. “Still at work?”

He hummed, “Yeah, just about wrapped up. I should be home soon.”

Amelia's stomach was storming with butterflies and she was scared, thinking, somehow, that her husband would unveil her secret through the phone. “Hurry,” she bit her bottom lip, “I have a surprise for you.”

“Oh?” She heard his voice perk up, “Is this a family friendly surprise? Or, should I just come straight to the bedroom?” She could hear a smirk playing at his lips.

“Why don't you just hurry home, and you can see for yourself.” Amelia teased.

Amelia must've fallen asleep watching television, because, one moment, she's watching The Real Housewives reruns at 3 something, and the next, she's waking up feeling lost in sleep at almost midnight.

She feels discombobulated for a moment until she realizes she was waiting for her husband before her unplanned nap. Confused, she looks around her quiet, empty- very dark- apartment.

Sitting up on the coach, she grabs her phone and dials Spencer's phone, simultaneously turning on a nearby lamp.

He said he'd be home soon. She thought to herself. She swallowed hard, her sleep making her mouth dry.

No rings. Straight to voicemail.

Yawning, she goes to her contacts, and dials the next best number she can think of.

After two rings, she hears an all too familiar male voice. “Hey, Amelia.”

“Hey, Derek. Sorry for waking you.” She knew she didn't wake him. She could hear the television in the background.

“Nah, mama, it's cool. What, Boy Genius not letting you sleep?” He laughed. Amelia could hear Savannah asking Morgan who's phone call he was on so late at night.

“Um- actually, that's why I called. Boy Genius isn’t home yet.” Amelia stood from the spot she was in for the past few hours, “I spoke with him earlier, and he said he'd be home around 3-ish.” She fiddled with her fingers, and an uneasy feeling in her stomach.

She could feel the confusion on the other line as Morgan quickly made an excuse, “You know, he probably turned his phone off and didn't realize it. That man is basically a caveman when it comes to technology. You know that.” Amelia started pacing her living room floor, “Don't stress, I'll call him and figure out where he is.”

The worried wife bit her inner cheek, “Thanks, Derek. Again, sorry for bothering you and the missus.” She felt guilty.

“Nothing to apologize about, Kid. I'll figure out where Pretty Boy is, and when I do, I'll eat his ear off for you.” He snickered, making Amelia smile. “Get some sleep. He’ll be home soon.”

Amelia wasn't tight-knit with Spencer's team, but she were fairly close. They were his family after all. So, it felt natural having to call Derek Morgan when Spencer hadn't come home yet. He was basically Spence’s big brother.

Saying another round of ‘thank you’s and ‘sorry’s, Amelia hung up the phone. Turning to face her kitchen counters, she saw the cupcakes she had set out in wait for her husband. Pink and blue sweets littered the countertops.

She had an uneasy feeling stirring within her. Nothing like the one she had before taking the pregnancy test. No, that was excitement. This, what she was feeling now, was all dread. With every fiber within her, she felt a strong fear.

And rightfully so.

Spencer was on the nose when he said he was ‘just about wrapped up’. After the call with his wife, he was more excited than usual to get home.

Spence and Amelia had what an outsider would call, puppy love. They were young, and openly affectionate. They were in what seemed to be a never-ending honeymoon phase.

Being together for 5 years, three of those as married, Spencer still looked at Amelia as if she was the reason the sun shone every morning, and she was the one who put the stars in the sky.

This was no ‘puppy love’. This was an ‘old couple sitting on a porch watching the sunset love’.

Spencer quickly packed his satchel, and because he was the last to leave the office, shut off all the lights. Taking the elevator down and quickly jogging to his parked car, he throws his bag in the passenger seat, and just as he's about to get in himself, he hears a voice call for him.

“Um- excuse me?” The curly headed brunette looks up, over his shoulder. He sees a hunched over chubby man, standing at the entrance of the parking lot. The two men lock eyes, and the stranger shows Spence a paper map from the distance. “I was a little lost, and was hoping I could just get some directions.”

The FBI agent licked his lips, and stepped a few feet away from his vehicle. “Where did you need to go?”

The chubby man made a smile which was crooked, “Question seems to be where I am now.” He laughed.

Spencer walked closer to the man who opened up the map. “Well, you're here,” he pointed at a cross section between two streets.

“And, now, where would that leave the Fish Market on Drewry Street?” He asked Spencer.

“Well, on Drewry Street, for starters.” Spence gave half a laugh, locating the street on the map.

As he pointed with his index finger, he looked up and saw the man staring intently at him. A smile took place on his lips, and before Spencer could react, or ask any questions, he felt a blunt force hit the back of his head.

Stumbling back with a grunt, the tall helpful man grabbed the back of his head, feeling warm, what he assumed was blood. “What the- agh! Mmpph!” A hand covered the agent's mouth.

In lighting speed, a windowless van pulls up beside the men. The man behind Spencer pushes him into the back of the new vehicle. The once hunched, and seemingly harmless stranger, now stood taller than Spencer. He shut the door of the van, leaving a half conscious, fully confused Spencer lying in the back. He jumped into the passenger seat of the van, and the car sped off with a screech.

Leaving behind only a skid mark on the road, and Spencer's satchel in the car, the van was long gone before any bystanders could take notice.

#spencer reid #spenced reid imagine #spencer fluff #spencer reid angst #off the deep end #og story

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writers-hes · 4 years

Text

christmas record.

hello! thank you so much for reading cherry, falling, and late christmas. if you haven’t read them yet, you could do so by clicking the link here.

if you want to be a part of my taglist, you can do so by clicking this link.

this is a fluffy christmas fic and even though christmas is done, i hope you enjoy it! this is my longest fic yet, with 6785 words! how cool is that? anyways, read and enjoy! send me feed back and requests, i really appreciate them :)

HAPPY 100+ FOLLOWERS I LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU!

warning: unedited ! i was rushing to post this before christmas but i’ll be going over my fics soon to edit everything. thank you!

------------

you were a photographer. you liked going to free shows around town, taking pictures of everyone in it. you liked how music swayed them and made them live in the moment. photography was your way of immortalising that fleeting moment. still, you weren’t as successful as other photographers to make it as your main source of income and that was okay. as long as you get to share your art with an audience, you knew you were doing something. you were on a break from your shift at baskin robbins when your phone notified that you just received a message.

helenepamburn.photography: Hello i just want to say i absolutely love your work!!

your phone read. helene pemburn was a photographer you’ve never heard of before. you decided to look at her instagram and check out her work and damn, it is amazing. it seems as though her muse was harry styles, your best friend’s favourite male artist. you have listened to his songs before, even downloaded his first album and he was good.

35mmdiary: oh my god!! thank you so much. i love yours too!! portrait is something that i’m not entirely good at :-)

helenepamburn.photography: Im helene, by the way ! What camera set-up do you usually use? 35mmdiary: hi, helene!! i’m y/n. i usually just use a minolta xg-1 camera and i switch up on the lenses…i’m more of a film photographer than a digital one… helenepamburn.photography: Ah! so you don’t use dlsr cameras?? 😮

35mmdiary: i do but i just take whatever photo and then edit it on lightroom…with my old presets hehehe

35mmdiary: oh im sorry i have to go i have to finish my shift!!

 the conversation ended at that at first but weeks into it and you found yourself really enjoying talking to helene. she became an instant friend, exchanging tips and tricks on photography. she would even talk about how it was touring with harry and etcetera. you wanted to meet each other soon but it was hard, seeing as your finals was right around the corner and harry releasing his new album.

———

“helene, who are you talking to? you’ve been on that phone for so long!” jeff azzof asked. it wasn’t unlike helene to type away at her phone 24/7. she was usually in her corner, editing harry’s photos for the world to see. “y/n,” she muttered. “who?”  “i found her on instagram and she really has amazing shots! look,” helene said, showing your instagram to jeff. “and this is all film! no editing,” she praised. “oh wow, she is good,” jeff commended. “yeah, well…about that. i think i’m gonna take a break from work first,” helene started. jeff looked at her quizzically. “i know harry’s about to release his album and there’s the thing at the forum and etcetera but i think y/n is gonna be a good replacement, no?”  “does harry know?” he asked. he was a little concerned that helene’s leave was a little sudden. sure, she’s been working hard, always going where harry was and taking photographs of him but still, it was abdrupt and it wasn’t quite what he was expecting. “ah, no not yet. i was hoping you could talk to him about it?” she shyly asked. harry’s been a ball of stress lately and helene knew that if something out of the schedule were to happen, harry would freak. “helene…” jeff warned. helene looked at him, practically begging him to go tell harry. jeff only sighed and nodded. “thank you!” she gushed. “i owe you one, big time,”

———

it was almost the holiday break, and you can already feel the christmas in l.a.—it’s not snowing, particularly and it’s not as iconic as new york christmas but you can already see christmas lights hanging downtown and at the grove. starbucks already released their holiday drinks and their holiday cups. you were finishing your last paper for the term, ready to finally get back to photography. you finished ahead of everyone else in class and begged some of your professors to let you take some quizzes and tests in advance. perhaps you were lucky this christmas because they allowed you to and you passed your term with good grades.

helenepemburn.photography: y/n I have a question to ask… 35mmdiary: sure what is it??

helenepemburn.photography: Are you done with classes? The semester?? 35mmdiary: yeah why?? helenepemburn.photography: How would you feel about replacing me as a photographer??? Im about to go on a break and I want you to be my fill-in??? You will be paid the same fee as I do during those days too

35mmdiary: What??? are you sure?? helenepemburn.photography: Yes!! The team will be in l.a. next week for a couple of interviews and etc so would be able to meet you and show you the ropes and hang out!!

35mmdiary: sure!! send me the details…i’m free until christmas anyway :)

helenepemburn.photography: See you then !! Im so excited to finally meet you !!

———

it’s been a few days and your best friend was absolutely ecstatic to know that you were harry styles’ photographer for a few weeks. you’ve been thinking about backing out but from your conversations with helene, it seems like she was really craving for a short break. she told you about going to japan and malibu with harry to take behind the scenes photographs. she loved it, of course but she was getting drained. besides, you will be paid a good amount of money for your services, unlike some of the previous bands who told you that you will have a shoutout for the ‘free’ photos you would give them. artists who don’t support artists suck, don’t they?

“i can’t believe! harry fucking styles!” your best friend, gina, exclaims. she was a harrie, the biggest one you’ve seen. she went to the forum, the closing venue for his first solo world tour, bought merch, and runs a fan account on twitter. “shh! keep it down, gina! it’s just a temporary job. i just took it as a favour to helene and also because it pays well. i can pay a little more to my college debt,” you muttered. “still! once you’re on tour with him, don’t you ever forget me,” she fake cries. “i just want a video greeting for harry, okay? like the one that i got you when i met adore delano,” she told you. you nodded and she squealed, jumpy in her seat because she was about to receive a personalised video from harry styles.

———

helenepamburn.photography: Im free right now if you want to meet up!! Im in la and i forgot how much i hated la traffic ://

35mmdiary: sure! where do you wanna meet? helenepamburn.photography: Harry rented an airbnb for all of us in beverly hills…would you like to meet in a coffee shop near it?? Im really craving for american starbucks right now 35mmdiary: sure! i’ll meet you there at 2:30? helenpamburn.photography: Ok and then we can go to the airbnb to meet up with jeff so he could walk you through the details sound good? 35mmdiary: okay…i’ll see you in a bit! be safe !  

you immediately went inside your shower to take a bath. you were finally meeting helene! you didn’t know who jeff was but you decided to dress a little nicer today just in case this jeff guy was a little strict. opting for minimal make up, your favourite floral pants, white shirt, and your boots, you decided to head out with your iPad and film camera to show helene some of your photos.

it’s almost 2:30 when you arrived at the coffee shop. helene was already there, waving at you excitedly. you smiled and jogged up to her. “helene!” you called as she greeted you with a hug. “y/n! i’m so happy i get to finally meet you!” she laughs. “i hope it’s alright, i already ordered for you,” she says. “oh! thank you. how much was it? i’ll pa—“ “don’t be silly now! it’s okay, you don’t have to worry about it. now, tell me, how have you been?” she asked. you chuckled. “i’m good! i finished all my papers early to focus a little bit on my photography,” you tell her. “college is really sucking the life out of me! i worked part time in baskin robbins too so the stress is just too much,” you grumbled. “ah, well, i promise photographing harry isn’t that stressful. he’s quite chill with whatever you present him as long as it’s in black and white,” she joked. “kidding aside, harry’s whole crew is kind. very approachable and very good people,” she informed you. her words brought comfort over you as you were worrying about how they would treat a newbie. “i’m just really taking a break because i’m so tired! besides, my best friend will get married on christmas and i wanted to be there and take some pictures,” she says.

“you did mention that you like wedding photographs too,” you told her. “i love them! they’re so fun and the vibe is so different. i’m a bridesmaid so i just have to be there, you know? i’m wearing a really cute dress too! here, i’ll show you,” she gushed. she took out her phone and opened the picture. it was a great dress. it was a long peach dress and helene said that all the bridesmaids had dresses inspired by the colours of the sunset. “that’s so cool! i wanna get married someday but then again, not really,” you shared. helene nodded at that. you both spent the afternoon together, walking around beverly hills and just talking.

“hey, let’s go back to the airbnb so i can introduce you to everyone!” she gushed. she booked an uber and then immediately dragged you to the car. you loved how chatty and enthusiastic she was, basically telling you her life story and her friend’s life story in just a few hours. you rode the car once it arrived and it zoomed past the fancy beverly hills neighbourhood. it was a few minutes after when you arrived at a big house. “we’re here! i’m so excited for you to meet jeff, mitch, sara, claire, and everyone else!” she squealed. she beat you into paying for the fare and then dragged you again to the main, where she knocked and cursed at jeff for not opening the door immediately in french.

“fuck’s sake, helene! hold on!” a man called from the inside. “that’s jeff, he’s the oldest in this house but doesn’t seem like it,” she snickered. you were about to reply to helene when a friendly-looking man opened the door. he was scowling at helene, a facial expression she only chuckled at. “hello, jeff! this is y/n, y/n, this is jeff,” she introduced. “hi, it’s nice to meet you,” you told jeff. “same here,” he brushed off. “come in, enter,” he said cooly. you frowned, helene said that they were nice people but jeff seems so intimidating. “give the poor girl a break, jeffrey!” helene said. she guided you to the living room and made you sit on the the couch. “so, i take you’re helene’s replacement while she’s away?” he asked.

“uh—yeah,” you replied, picking on the loose thread of your white shirt. he chuckled at your nervousness. “you dress like harry,” “sorry?” you asked. helene laughed, noticing how similar you dressed with the star. “she does! i just noticed that!” your friend exclaimed.

“anyways, i’ll be fetching some papers and documents you have to sign. harry’s a big star after all, we can’t trust everyone,” he said before going to god-knows-where. “i’m sorry! he’s not really like that. it’s just that many people before you came here with me as an intern or something but they always end up leaking photos, putting harry in trouble and all that,” helene apologised. “oh, i totally understand. it’s no problem,” you reassured. you were fumbling on your shirt, once more, when jeff arrived. “here,” he put the folder on the coffee table. “read the document over and sign it if you agree, of course…it’s just about harry’s privacy and all that,” he said. “call me when you’re don, i’ll just make us a drink,” he left the room again and probably into the kitchen. you read over the document a few times before signing on the required pages. it was basically concerned with harry’s privacy and how you couldn’t sell harry’s photographs to the tabloids. helene was there with you to explain the whole contract and how the ropes would work.

“she’s done, jeff!” she called. jeff emerged from the kitchen with a tray of iced coffee and some fruits. he laid the tray down on the table gently and took the folder from your grasp. you watched as he made sure that you signed all of the pages on the papers and smiled. “welcome to the team!” he suddenly beamed.

“thanks,” you smiled at him.

“i’m sorry for being rude earlier. it’s just that some photographers and ‘newbies’ take this job for granted. so, anyway,” he coughed. “help yourself to some coffee and tell me about yourself,”

“well, uh—i’m y/n y/l/n. 21 years old and i’m currently taking up business ad. i really love photography but my parents aren’t really set on supporting me have it as my profession in the future. i, uh, also take photographs of artists in free shows but i mostly do film, if that’s okay? harry’s photos will be developed after four hours if we’re here in l.a. but probably more than that if we’re not here, which i’m assuming won’t happen? i have a friend from one of my electives who knows how to develop film,” you told him.

“it’s worth the wait, jeff! do you have some photos, y/n?” helene interjected. you nodded and took out your iPad.

“uh, you can just swipe through the images of the scenes and people i took,” you told him, opening the photos app and into your digital portfolio. you handed jeff the ipad and waited anxiously. “wow, these are good. helene actually showed me your instagram already and i’m impressed. now, we will give you some money for the films and the development process when you start working, which is tomorrow—“

“ah, it’s okay. the salary is enough to cover for everything,” you reassured. “no, no. i insist. helene also had the same budget. besides, you’re doing us a favour for agreeing to this job instantly,” he said. you nodded shyly. “anyways, you could stay here in the house or something since helene will leave the day after but that’s your choice, completely.” he said. “i’ll just stay in my apartment,” you told him. he nodded and looked at the time. “well, dinner’s about to start. i suggest you attend so you could meet everyone,” he smiled. you nodded, not really wanting to piss your new boss. “i’m sure everyone’s excited to meet the baby of the team,” he chuckled.

“ah! i’m so excited for you to meet claire and sara. you’re gonna love them!” helene squealed. “wait here, okay? i’ll just change into my pyjamas,” she said. you nodded and watched her leave the living room, leaving you alone with jeff.

“so, where did you grow up?” he asked. “i actually grew up here in california and then moved here in l.a. for my studies,” you informed him.

“that’s great,” he nodded. “let’s just wait for everyone else to come,” he said. you nodded and spent the following minutes chatting with helene and jeff. he may have been intimidating at first but he was a pretty chill guy. you liked his humour and immediately clicked once helene told him about the time some bands were lowballing you with a shoutout, to which jeff told you you should be charging more for your shots. it was nearing eight when two girls barged in the door, bringing some takeout.

“sara, claire!” jeff greeted. “this is y/n, the newest baby of our team,” he said. you waved at them shyly.

“she dresses like harry,” sara observed. “that’s what i thought so too!” jeff chuckled. he took the paper bags from the girls. “i’ll just fix this up in the kitchen while your girls chat,” he said while going back to the kitchen. “jeff is such a dad to all of us,” sara said once she sat in front of you with claire. “yeah, it’s nice knowing that there’s parental love going around here or it would be such a mess! mitch is the slobbiest person ever while sara here, hates his mess!” claire said. “so, how did you know helene was about to leave?” she asked. she wasn’t asking in an intruding way, she was just curious.

“well, helene and i are ‘internet friends’,” you told them. “i’m a photographer and i mostly use film. it was her who told me to come fill-in for her while she was away,”

“wait, youre 35mmdiary?” sara asked. you nodded. “she’s been raving about your work and harry seemed to like it too! i follow you on social media!”

“me too! i love your work! so, so good,” claire added.

“thanks, guys! that really means a lot to me,” you said. you took a mental note to follow them back once you go back home.

“where are the guys, anyway?” helene asked. “we couldn’t start dinner without them,”

“mitch told me he was with harry, buying some chinese food. they’re on their way back, though.” sara said.

“oh well, let’s just wait for them to come back,” helene said. you girls nodded and chatted for a bit until eighteen minutes later, the door opened, revealing the harry styles himself and mitch.

“i told you, haz! you should’ve bought soup dumplings instead of the fried ones,” a guy with long hair complained.

“but there might be holes in the dumplings and all the soup would fall out. fried dumplings are the safe option, honestly,”

“guys—“

“sarah, tell harry that soup dumplings are better that fried o—“ he stopped, just realising that there was another person in the house. “hello, who are you?” he asked, utterly confused.

“i’m the photographer filling in for helene while she’s away,” you spoke. “ah, well in that case, hello! my name is mitch,” he said. when he noticed that harry wasn’t speaking soon, he spoke again. “this is harry and that over there is adam,” “oh yeah, i know. hi, harry,” you shyly waved at him. you also waved a greeting to adam to which he returned. harry gave you a tight-lipped smile. you always imagined this moment to be somewhat chill but right now, your cheeks were absolutely burning because of how beautiful he was. pictures didn’t do him justice, no offense to helene but it was the reality. “i’m y/n,” you added.

“hi, y/n. i’m harry but mitch already beat me to it,” he muttered. mitch only laughed and told him to go to jeff so he could set up the table.

“she kinda dresses like you, no?” mitch commented once he thought they were out of earshot.

it was less than ten minutes when jeff called you girls to go to the dining room. you were sat beside helene and in front of harry, who seemed to look everywhere but you.

“well, this was supposed to be a simple dinner but it isn’t. let’s welcome y/n into the family and bid farewell to helene,” jeff started. “everyone say ‘welcome to the family, y/n’!” there was a chorus of welcomes around the table and you only managed to mutter a shy ‘thank you’ to everyone.

“so, how did you know helene?” mitch asked. “oh we met through the internet,” you replied. “she messaged me about my work and then i looked at her profile a bit and decided that i loved he work too,”

“we’ve known each other for months but only met today, actually.” helene said. “huh, i would’ve thought that you knew each other for years but then again, helene has always been the noisy one,” adam commented.

“you’re just as noisy as i am! i cant believe this is how you treat me on my last day until i come back,” helene faked sobbed.

“let’s jusy eat dinner, yeah? poor y/n must’ve been so tired and hungry from all the talk you’ve been drilling into her,” adam said. everyone nodded and took their food. you shyly opened your chinese take-out box.

“y/n, i’m sorry if this is rude but i haven’t seen any of your work before,” mitch suddenly said.

“i’m not really a big photographer,” you started. “honestly, i just go to free shows and then offer my services for a cheaper price,”

“you should definitely see her work, babe. so, so, good! she does film and that’s like, super hard,” sarah added. babe? “y/n, show him your ipad so they’ll believe me!”

“alright...” you nodded and fished for your ipad, opening the album that contained your beat shots so far. you handed it to mitch. you stared at him for any reactions and was glad to see him focus on your pictures, zooming in on some of them.

“these aren’t filters? damn, you’re good. yo, look at this, adam! isn’t this the band you’ve been listening to on soundcloud?” mitch asked, showing adam your photograph of the vocalist of peach pit. adam looks over and gapes.

“y/n, this is so good! what’s your username on insta? i’ll give you a follow!”

“it’s 35mmdiary! i’ve been showing you gus her work for months now,” helene grumbled.

the dinner started and ended like that, with friendly banter from what seems to be a loving environment. jeff was definitely the father of the group. you liked everyone but harry. he hasn’t talked to you all night, just stealing some glances at your direction. helene booked you an uber and told you to text her once you’re home. you nodded and bid her good bye before riding into the car.

———

“harry, what do you think of y/n?” jeff asked once you left.

“pretty cool girl, yeah?” he commented.

“you barely looked at her! she’s quite lovely,” claire added.

“probably because he finds her cute or something,” mitch teased. “always does that! playing hard to get but really, what is there to get?”

“shut up, mitch,” he blushed. it was true. harry did sort of find tou attractive. you were so kind to everyone, taking their compliments gracefully. you got along so well with the other members and he wanted to talk to you but adam and helene hogged the conversation. perhaps he should talk to you alone, sometime?

“okay so, christmas is coming soon and once again, we will be needing to have our secret santa!” sarah said, changing the subject as harry looked like a poor fish gaping.

“should we include y/n?” adam asked.

“of course! she’s a part of our family now, even if it’s temporarily,” helene said.

“yeah and we should take you out instead...” harry teased.

“hey! that’s not nice,”

“well, she’ll be coming in tomorrow and basically everyday to accompany harry on photoshoots and to get some shots as well. we could talk to her about it tomorrow,” jeff informed. everybody nodded at that.

“gotta go back to my room, m’tired from today,” harry yawned. everybody said good night as he left tahe living room.

———

unknown to them, harry was actually looking theough your instagram. he decided to follow you once he reached his assigned room. everybody was right, you are good. he was so excited to have you as a part of the team.

harrystyles: Nice meeting you today, y/n. x

35mmdiary: hi hi!! it was nice meeting you today too :-)

harrystyles: Your works are lovely. I’m so excited to see more of your work.

35mmdiary: thanks ! i hope you like what you see so far. thanks for hiring me by the way

harrystyles: It’s quite alright! I loved what Helene showed me. I tried to get into film photography but it never worked out. So hard to figure out the settings. :(

35mmdiary: i actually started with dispposable cameras! they really helped me know what i like! i could teach you some of the stuff i know if you like. im not a pro or anything but i think there’s a few things i could teach you?

harrystyles: That sounds great! When are we doing it?

harrystyles: Can we do it tomorrow? I’m free tomorrow.

harrystyles: Only if it’s okay with you. :)

35mmdiary: yes of course ! i could meet you in the house tomorrow morning ?

harrystyles: No, it’s okay. I’ll just have someone pick you up just send me your address. I’m not a serial killer, I promise.

you gave harry your address and your number, just in case he needed it. that night, you looked for your spare disposable films while harry told jeff that you would be accompanying him tomorrow. jeff only teased harry but allowed it anyway.

———

“good morning!” you chirped as you entered the black range rover. harry smiled at you. the driver at the driver’s seat nodded at you.

“good morning, love. i got you breakfast, if it’s okay. if you don’t like it i could eat it and we could go somewhere else for breakfast,” harry rambled, offering you a brown bag. you looked into it and saw a ham and cheese croissant—your favourite sandwich.

“this will do just fine. this is my favourite sandwich,” you said as you dug into the bag to get your sandwich. “would you like some? we could share if you like,” you offered. harry shook his head no, telling you that he already ate the same sadnwich as you did.

“by the way,” you started as you swallowed the pastry. “i got some disposable cameras that you could use in my bag,”

“you shouldn’t have...” harry pouted. “i basically hogged your whole day and now you’re giving me stuff too?”

“it’s okay. i wanted to. as long as we end just in time for me and helene to say goodbye to each other,” you smiled.

“lunch is on me then! i know this place near santa monica that served the best chicken wings!” he declared. you chuckled at his etermination to get even with you. “what are we doing today, by the way?”

“well, i was thinking we could go on a classic photowalk. it’s basically just us walking and taking photos of the things we like,” you told him. “i was thinking we could take photos downtown...” you trailed off, not realizing that the paparazzi might see harry. “or somewhere else you like so we could avoid the paparazzi,”

“we’ll go downtown then!” he said, not really caring about tomorrow’s tabloids. harry liked your presence. for some reason, it made him feel at ease. he didn’t care if you’d be labelled as harry’s girlfriend tomorrow. he just wanted to have a nice afternoon walking around and taking photos that he like.

“well, for me, it’s the perfect place. if you’re into portraits, you could photograph people! if you’re into sceneries, you could do that too,” you gushed as you finished the last of your croissant. “i like sceneries and candids a lot. taking portraits is something that i’m not really good at,”

“at least you know something! i’m such a beginner,” he admitted. “drop us off here, please, thank you.” harry told the driver. the driver nodded and stopped the car. harry immediately went out, dragging tou by the hand to hide from onlookers. it’s not like he didn’t want to meet fans, he did. it was just that he’d rather be unnoticed when dealing with private matters, such as spending time with a girl whom he finds cute to gain some brownie points. he led you to an empty alley.

“you alright?” he asked. you nodded and fished out for the cameras in your bag.

“harry? here are the cameras. there are 36 shots per camera and because i brought you theee, you could do more than a hunderd. just give them back to me after you use it so i could have my friend develop them,” you breathed.

“thank you so much, y/n! you didn’t have to because i also have my own camera. just don’t know how to adjust it,” he frowned, looking down at the expensive camera hanging on his chest.

“i could take a look at it, if you like,” you offered. harry beamed at you and nodded rapidly. that day, you spent the afternoon taking photos of people living their daily lives. it was such a great day, walking downtown with cameras at hand. the day consisted of you and him talking about the most embarrassing stories you could think of when you were younger. he told you about the many times he fell onstage during his concerts, to which you laughed at, saying that you tripped on a wire once when you were photographing a gig for a local band. onlookers wouldn’t think that you were strangers at all but you didn’t mind.

that night, at the beverly hills mansion, you and the team huddled together to pick names for the small exchange gift. you left the house with a smile on your face a few hours after, really loving the group.

“alright, who picked y/n?” harry asked as soon as he walked back in from waiting outside until you left.

“why?” mitch asked. “well--” “he obviously likes her, dumbass,” adam said.

“you just met twice why would you like her immediately?” mitch asked again, clearly missing out on something. “she’s really a nice girl. besides, what’s wrong with finding her cute?” harry asked, clearly giddy about the day he spent with you. “she’s so cute especially when i told her earlier that she looked good in what she was wearing! then, she gave me these disposable cameras,” he added, showing off the cameras hanging on his wrist. “i really wanna get her something for christmas but i think it’s a little straightforward to just give her one, no?”

“what would you do for you to get her name?” sarah asked. “i’ll pay you a hundred dollars and treat you and a friend to a nice dinner,”

“i got her,” jeff said, giving the paper to harry and harry giving another piece with a different name on it. he gave jeff 300 dollars for the dinner and the monetary gift and said thank you. he smiled with his dimples showing and retired to bed.

“he’s whipped,” mitch mouthed to sarah. sarah only nodded, really finding it cute how harry found y/n cute.

-------

you’ve been photographing harry and his band for so many days now, rarely even having the time to clean your apartment, which was fine. it was always clean, only feeling like it wasn’t because harry was at your place, going over the photographs that he would be posting on his social media. you told him that you could come by the house in beverly hills but he told you to just stay at home so it would be safer. you didn’t protest but you did stress clean for a little bit.

“i really like this photo,” he pointed at your laptop. “i think mum would really like this, yeah?”

you nodded. it wasn’t your best shot but so far, it looked like it was harry’s favourite image of himself. you were done for the night and you were tired but you didn’t want harry to leave yet. you were enjoying his company and it seems as though he was feeling the same when he decided to open a new conversation.

“so, who did you pick for secret santa?” he asked as you opened your spotify christmas playlist and played it softly on the bluetooth speaker on the coffee table. “i can’t tell you that! it would ruin the whole thing,” you replied. you were perched on your couch, facing harry.

“why not? it’s not like you got me, unless you did…” he teased.

“maybe, maybe not,” you shrugged. harry pouted but started to hum to the christmas music anyway before sipping on his hot cocoa. “you know what i would love from you?”

“what?” he asked. he’s been tearing his hair for a perfect gift for you but nothing really came up. he wanted to get you a film camera but that would be too basic. “a christmas record from you! your voice is so good,” you gushed. “it would sound so great and i’m sure you’d sing christmas classics like the one paul mccartney sang,” you mused, clearly unaware of what was going through harry’s head. he finally found a perfect gift for you. “if you ever release a christmas album, hit me up immediately! i’d stream and buy the hell out of it. i’ll even wear your christmas merch,”

--------

“everyone shut up! i’m gonna record something in my room, don’t bother me,” harry breathed as soon as he arrived in the rented home. everyone’s eyebrows shot forward. they were huddled in the living room, playing uno. “okay, i’m sorry just don’t make too much noise!” he apologised. he ran to his assigned room after that, locking his door and taking out his guitar. clueless as to where he would start off, he decided to text helene.

harry styles: Helene!

Helene.: Harry !

harry styles: Do you know y/n’s favourite Christmas songs?

Helene: Not really but she’d be into classics dont you think?? Why ??

harry styles: I kinda got her for secret Santa and I don’t know what to give.

harry styles: Do you really think she’d be into the classics? Helene: Yes now stop talking to me i have to attend the dinner rehearsals why do you have to rehearse for dinner?

that night, harry set up his personal microphone, a device that he could just slip into his laptop’s usb, and sang at least three songs that he would sing with gemma whenever he was home for the holidays.

-------

it was after harry’s successful live show at the forum. you were busy capturing every moment of the tour with your camera. gina, your best friend was in the crowd too. it was your early christmas gift for her, along with a personalised video from harry like you promised. she squealed and hug you for being the ‘best best friend ever’. you laughed and received her hugs with joy. you were supposed to have a small staff-only after show party but decided not to come. you were tired and all you wanted was sleep. you told jeff about it and he nodded, hugging you and asking you if it was okay if you left alone. you nodded and wished him a good party. that night, you went home to your apartment, looking over the new photos that your friend e-mailed you so you could show them to harry the next time you see him. you took note of the pictures you liked alot.

“where’s y/n?” harry asked as soon as he greeted everyone. “oh, she left! said she felt tired and just wanted to sleep,” jeff shouted over the loud music and the loud people. the party became bigger as staff invited friends and family to come over. harry didn’t mind, he liked crowds. harry nodded at jeff, a little disappointed because he was hoping to get to you. he would be leaving for london next week for another live show and he was sure that you wouldn’t be able to come. the live show at the forum was supposed to be the big ending for the celebration of harry’s album in america. if he wouldn’t be able to see you now, he wouldn’t see you at all, probably.

--------

it was nearing 1 am when your doorbell rang. being a light sleeper, you woke up from your slumber in the couch. you must’ve fallen to sleep while finalising images you wanted to show harry next day. you fixed the coffee table a little bit then begrudgingly walking to the door, only to reveal the man who’s been keeping you busy.

“hi, y/n. may i come in?” harry asked. you nodded and opened the door wider, the cold from your air conditioning unit greeting harry.

“what are you doing here?” you asked as you and your guest settled on your couch. “well, i was at the party and i noticed you were gone so, i decided to come by. i’m sorry if it was so sudden it’s just that, i picked you for secret santa and i wanted to give you my gift before i leave for london next week,” he rambled. he the handed you a pretty christmas box.

“thank you, harry. what about your party?” you asked. “it’s fine, they’re fine. i just wanted to be here with you more.” he smiled. “go on, open it!”

you opened the box that revealed a red sweater.

“you said you wanted christmas merch, right? that you would wear it?” he asked. you nodded and unfolded the sweater to reveal a ‘harry’ sweatshirt in red. it was the one that gina wanted for so long but in the colour pink. harry’s name was embroidered on the soft red sweater in white, and his motto ‘treat people with kindness’ was embroidered on one of the sleeves in red.

“i picked out the colours and i hope you like it! it’s not from the same manufacturer but i figured you would like it,” he said. you looked deeper into the box to find a cd and a flashdrive. the cd cover was you and harry, a selfie he took using his phone when you were out having a photowalk. “you said you wanted a christmas record and here it is,” he said. you were smiling widely and thanking harry for the thoughtful gifts he got you. “i, uh, you have to listen to the songs and text me if you liked them, alright? text me as soon as you finish it.i have to go back to the party and entertain but i’d really love to hear your thoughts on the record, okay?” he asked, standing up from his seat and kissing your forehead. you nodded and watched him go outside your door, too overwhelmed with his thoughtful gift. you inserted the flashdrive in your laptop’s usb and clicked on track 1.

track 1 was harry’s rendition for paul mccartney’s wonderful christmas time--your favourite christmas song. you casually mentioned it to him once but didn’t think that he would remember. there were 8 tracks in the flashdrive, harry’s voice and guitar playing filling your apartment. you were wearing the sweater he gave you, feeling giddy at the gifts he gave you. you just finished track 7 and waited for track 8 to play when harry’s talking voice was heard from the speakers.

“hi, y/n,” he started. “well, i hope you like my gifts for you. the truth is, jeff was actually the one who picked you and i picked claire but i bribed him so i could give you this gift. truth be told, i like you. like, i’m crushing on you and if you feel the same way, i’m waiting in the parking lot. i just wanted to say this and was wondering if you wanted to go out on a date before i go back to london for the show and the holidays. wow this feels like a goddamn movie and i sort of like it. i hope you really love my gifts. i’m waiting outs--” you stopped the audio and immediately ran to the door, opening it. it revealed harry who was sitting beside the door, waiting anxiously. once he heard you go out, he stood up and smiled at you.

“silly boy! of course i’d go out on a date with you,” you said as you hugged him. he was chuckling, thanking the heavens for giving hime a wonderful christmas.

“what about when i’m in london? how would we talk then?” he asked. “we’ll make it work, yeah? see how it plays out,” you said. you felt him put his chin on the top of your head after kissing it.

it was the perfect ending to a perfect night and as the christmas lights surround you with your wreath hung on your door, you both wished for this christmas miracle to last.

-----

im soff

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mtg-thrill-of-possibility · 3 years

Text

A Reflection on Magic, the Pandemic, and the Dark Side of Arena

Hello to all the readers who may stumble upon this in the search for new Magic content. I wrote this mostly to fill a void in my life that has opened up over the last year and more of a mental health thing than some form of Magic related advice but since it is about that, I thought they’d go hand in hand. I love Magic. Or at least I have loved Magic? It’s hard to tell. Like nearly everyone on this planet, I’ve been shut off from in-person Magic and it had/has me left down. I normally volunteer at my LGS and help them organize their tournaments and judge the events and generally whatever else they ask me to do because I really love Magic. I love playing with my locals who don’t spend hundreds of dollars and craft GP/MF level decks. I love watching a group of people playing draft chaff and off beat home brews and where adults and teenagers can compete with one another on that level. I enjoy sitting off to the corner on the store’s EDH night and listening to games and drawing tokens for games in my own corner while I wait for my own games or sometimes my ow turns. I also love traveling with my wife to cities and go compete in GP/MFs where we usually both scrub out of the main event by round 3 or 4 and then hit the vendors and side events as well as explore the cities for new restaurants. I miss Welcome Days where adults bring in kids and I show them the ropes. I love meeting adults who poke their noses in and ask me “Magic is still a thing? I played that in high school” and show them the changes. I can still remember the Theros Beyond Death prerelease last year and thought how much fun it was to not work the event for once and just play. And looking back, boy am I glad I entered the THB prerelease.

February was the start of the downturn. Our EDH night was slightly less full but I just figured it was due to the weather since the winter usually has a downturn in the attendance for every event. But then the rotating cast of 10-15 FNM players was 6; Pioneer on Saturday had 3. The next week, the EDH crowd was down to from the usual 6-8 pods to 2. FNM and Pioneer failed to fire. The news that COVID-19 was starting to creep into the Midwest prompted me to ask the store what precautions we wanted to take and when we were going to stop in general.

I work in chemical research and I have a background in pharmaceuticals and once (or twice) studied the MCATs and considered going to med school. I was definitely concerned but in February it hadn’t reached my state (yet) and I wanted the store to be ready for the imminent shutdown and continued downtick in participation (my LGS and I had been strategizing how to move up in events and the store ranking on the WPN). But it’s a red state. Science denial must be a recessive trait that the Midwest incorporated into its identity for a long time and I was told that I had some freedom but to not go crazy. I thought I’m a volunteer. I’m not spending what little money I have on stuff for you guys. So, I did the best thing I could think of for free, I started a Discord server. I was really excited at the prospect. I had just bought a webcam in case my workplace started working from home and thought how cool it would be to be able to organize events in Arena and talk through Discord when the store wasn’t available. I asked if we could hang up a flyer and tell all the Magic customers that they continue with tournaments and Magic if they joined the Discord I set up in the store’s name.

My LGS asked how much this was going to cost them and I said exactly as much as it costs them now if not a little less since we don’t need the store’s utilities or a cashier behind the counter in the after hours to work the tournament. They were happy and I got the greenlight. Things worked okay at first. Those with Arena accounts showed for a few weeks. Others I knew were interested were convinced that we were overly sensitive to the virus and FNMs continued to limp along with 4-6 people until everything ground down to a halt.

Come mid-March, COVID had finally reached the state and the city. Cases were light, a few hundred people tested each day, single digit cases detected but I again was worried. My workplace had already begun educating everyone on how to wash their hands properly and disinfect every surface and everyone was issued a bleach spray bottle with their name and a serial number on it. While the mayor and governor hadn’t ordered a shutdown yet, I advised strongly that the store go ahead and if they wanted to continue that I wouldn’t be there to assist until the curve was sufficiently flattened.

I’m not sure why but they trusted me and listened. I was glad and I pushed again for people to join the Discord server. Players were reluctant but I assured them that this may be the future for some time and if they get on now, they can still get the Ravnica intro quests and start building up their Arena collections. I got more on my side, we had 8-10 and got them all to try and hook anyone else they knew to join us. However, by the end of March, my workplace had moved to 100% virtual and with my extra time, I had begun to unwittingly shift the power dynamic in the store by accident. You see, I really love Magic. I was now working from home for a job that required me to have direct physical access to hundreds of thousands of dollars or sensitive equipment that need recertification when they get moved 12 inches down a work bench and dangerous chemicals I don’t want near me unless I know there’s an inspected chemical shower nearby. When the campus shut down, I got very bored. I did what research I could from my home portal, attended virtual conferences and webinars every day, but I had tons of down time. That meant watching my wife play Animal Crossing, playing with my dogs, marathon sessions of Civilization but most crucially, I also began grinding Arena.

My local meta had been defined by the understanding that none of us were really Arena players. I had played when the Kaladesh and Amonkhet closed betas were happening, but I was turned off by the fact that all my playing of those formats amounted to nothing when it launched with Ixalan and I would start from square one. Everyone in the group typically shied away from tier 1 tournament decks because to all of us, it was more fun to goof around with RG auras and Tilonalli’s Summoner decks than it was to grind Esper Hero or the new Uro decks. And the limitation that everyone didn’t have all the shocklands meant we were all playing on roughly the same card pools with some variation due to our play styles. So when I suggested we all start playing Arena to replace the tournaments, it worked because it meant we all played the same dumb decks we’d play in person with a few exceptions of having less than perfect mana bases.

But I would find myself grinding Arena everyday where my friends and locals were not. Even though I jumped into Arena at mid-March, I finished the Theros Beyond Death mastery at level 78 when Ikoria began to creep around the corner. I had just begun to get back into Magic when Fate Reforged hit and didn’t realize how much I love wedge color alignments over shards but boy did I love Abzan in Khans standard and now I was in love with Abzan again in Ikoria standard. Grinding the way I did meant I drafted most afternoons for the first month of Ikoria (and forced Temur every time) and started climbing the ranked ladder in the evenings. Ikoria would also mark the first time I spent money on Arena. I’m notoriously spend-thrift in video games and anything you can free-to-play I do religiously because you shouldn’t make a game grindable over the course of years if you give me that option. But drafting took gems and I really love drafting but most people at my LGS are too concerned about rares than learning to do it properly and a lot of younger players feel lost when I draft a zero rare deck and go 4-0 and collect my prizes. By the end of April, I would reach Platinum in constructed and Gold in limited. But now my LGS was far less inclined to play with me. I didn’t brag about any of my rankings but the skill disparity had begun to creep in as well as the difference in our collections. Having played so much Arena, I could see the tells the software gives away that paper Magic doesn’t. I learned to read when the game would hang up on the beginning of combat and end steps because they’re holding potential responses. I began to do the full control shortcut to bluff counter spells and removal. In paper Magic, if my opponent would sequence things wrong or tap their mana wrong, we’d make jokes and rewind it because it’s one of those human errors that we all make and redo it the right way.

But Arena was different; some learned the hard way to not trust the auto-tapper, some didn’t realize that the way they normally stack triggers in paper is backwards and too late to fix after a spell or ability resolved. And I couldn’t help them. And I let them make their mistakes because I can’t change Arena. If they use the auto-tapper and they realize that Arena doesn’t tap the Castle Vantress even though they couldn’t activate it anyway and they lose a dual source, I couldn’t help them. If they have the lethal Explosion in hand but forgot to hit Control in their second main so they can stack the Wilderness Reclamation triggers in their end step, I don’t concede out of pity.

In May, I try and keep the Magic going by suggesting that we shift the format to a draft limited but they’re unconvinced of the website that allows you to simulate an 8-person draft and then import the drafted card lists to Arena. Why? Because they don’t have the cards already and I’ve changed the dynamic. They know I’m much more skilled at Arena and Ikoria drafting. The news has also been reporting that the curve was flattening, and our state was lifting restrictions on gatherings. They want to play EDH and paper Magic, not this digital intangible game. I reluctantly agree but keep grinding on Arena anyway. My friends didn’t want to play Magic on Arena and I couldn’t understand why. I was getting burned out on drafting at this point and the drafts were harder to fire off a month and a half later, work was returning on a limited schedule where I was onsite 75% and virtual 25%, it really did seem like things were returning to normal.

In June I finish the Ikoria mastery and at this point my wife had begun to show more interest in playing on Arena and trying to get her account a little more stocked since our normal paper system is I aggregate everything we typically need and I make her desired deck and hand it off to her to wreck people on FNM but since I didn’t have to judge, I got to play and we couldn’t both play from my account at the same time. I casually start hers and I get the wild hair that maybe I should make a loaner account in the store’s name and if anyone says they don’t have the cards, they can borrow the store’s account for the tournament. I make the account but put the pipe dream on hold when Wizards announces that in-store play can resume with the Core 2021 prerelease. I could read between the lines and see that the curve was trending the wrong way and thought it was a bad idea but at my insistence, everyone would have to wear a mask at all times and hand sanitizer was available every 15 feet and the store had lots of space for players to spread out. The turnout was low which helped as well, and I had everyone who showed up at least aware that I was trying to keep the Discord going and that in case there’s another shutdown that there was another avenue for them.

Well, I got my wish because within a week of the launch of Core 2021, my state had regressed, and cases were exploding and gathering restrictions were sent back in place. Shortly after that, Wizards suspended in-store play again and with that I created the store’s Arena account. At the time, things were pretty good. The locals weren’t playing as much and my server was still fairly empty but most of the Magic Twitch community I interacted with had strongly adjusted to the new paradigm. EDH streaming was commonplace, I had my new Arena account to focus on building up as well as my own. Pro level events and Opens were being held on Arena and the expansion of Amonkhet Remastered gave me hope that Magic was on the mend. But I also think it was with Core 2021 that things started to slide into the negative for me. Grinding the second account was frustrating me a lot. The lack of human interaction was tilting me out for no reason. Some days the server would have me wait a whole minute (the horror?!) for a game and then my opponent would be the world’s slowest red player where everything seemed delayed. There would strings of games I would play where I couldn’t get a third land drop after a mull to 4 and other times where I’d flood out and would have won if it weren’t for generic whiny reason why everyone says they lose.

Maybe it was when I began to see that Arena is not Magic the Gathering as much as it is a video game that it began to really sour on me. For those of you who don’t play a lot of Arena and instead interact with humans over webcams is that Arena is designed for you to not play off beat home brews except in direct challenges with your friends. The game is meant for you to play the best combination of 75 cards and for you to help it machine learn through millions of matches what is and what is not the correct play pattern based on the available information you have. It wants you to play the very best decks in a format against the other best decks. I started to see this in Ikora standard when decks would scoop if you were on the play and went turn 2 Agonizing Remorse. Decks were and still are so linear that they can’t handle that kind of disruption or it’s a matter of the players know it’s faster to accumulate wins by scooping than grinding out a long game.

If you need evidence of whether or not this is true, you should play Arena now and see how often people scoop against the double Ruin Crab opener with a Fabled Passage back-to-back. Or if an opponent against your Lurrus Auras deck will time out when they know they can’t win. In paper Magic, when you drive 4 hours to a major venue, pay your entry fee, you never see your opponent rage scoop unless it’s Legacy and you know what your opponent’s on and you mull to zero so you can see what’s in their deck. You call a judge to your table if they start stalling. Nothing is more annoying that an opponent spamming “Good Game” at you through a match when it’s obvious that you’re not killing them that turn but they’re empty handed and have nothing relevant on board.

I’ll admit myself that what my wife calls “Wizard Chores” for the Daily quests, if I’m 1 red spell short of finishing a quest, I’ll log in for one more game and Boulder Dash my opponent’s creature or cast Shock to face and immediately scoop. Who is that helping? I’d spend the week at work in my down times thinking about what dumb cards I hadn’t played with from a set, start making a list, furiously find the cards on a Friday afternoon and grab dinner with the wife and then race to my LGS for FNM. Magic used to be something I only got to do twice a week with people in a shared setting and we’d unroll our playmats, shuffle up our jank, and laugh and generally have a good time for three to four hours. With Magic at my fingertips, Arena is a distillation of efficiency at spell slinging combined with the minor rewards system we’ve come to recognize the free-to-play traps to “encourage” us to play different things. If I want to play 100 matches in a day, all I need to do is sit at my computer long enough. If I want to play my old jank on Arena, I can’t even count on the Casual play channel to help since it’s always filled with people with 55 of the 60 cards that make the best deck learning how to play before they commit the wild cards for the deck.

Zendikar Rising has been a pretty dark point for everyone on Arena I believe. It seems like a lifetime ago that Omnath was printed and that I had immediately cashed in four mythic rare wildcards for the deck I would get to play with on Arena for 2 weeks before Wizards realized their mistake. Honestly before I had started writing this in the week before Kaldheim will hit Arena, I forgot that Omnath was part of the most recent set as all I can remember Zendikar Rising giving us is the extremely irritating Ruin Crab and Soaring Thought Thief. The few locals I had left on my Discaord server when ZNR released had lost interest in Arena since they enjoyed the Ravnica standard that was rotating out and Pioneer was not yet available for Arena. I’ve encouraged nearly everyone I know from my LGS to buy webcams since October given that the current state of the COVID world is not likely to go away and the new culture and channels that have opened up in the world to fill the void of EDH has some level of benefit even when in-person play resumes. Not many people play and I’ll search for an occasional game on the official Discord when the craving strikes. Some of my friends have been taking advantage of the webcam world and started playing older formats with me over webcam such as Pioneer and Modern to rekindle their love for Magic and the hope that we can start playing tournaments over webcam. Finishing up the ZNR mastery passes on my two accounts and my wife’s account has been giving me a much-needed break from Arena and honestly, it’s probably done the most to lift my spirits.

I’ve been taking a lot more time to reflect on why I love Magic and I plan on doing in the future. The first thing I know I’m going to do and stick to is not get a Mastery Pass for mt LGS store’s account. They don’t pay for all the work I put into the one already grinding multiple accounts is not good for my mental well-being. The second thing I know I am going to do is relearn how to have fun in Magic again. Not really hinted at in this article so far is the fact I love the art in Magic and I’m often inspired by my own crazy mind to illustrate my own works or reimagine my favorite cards with my own art. Since the release of Rise of Skywalker, I had been working on a personal project of creating a second expansion to the largely underground Star Wars the Gathering card game and ended up making 200 unique, draftable cards. I wouldn’t call myself an artist because I’m still learning and I don’t necessarily aspire to an artist but I would love to improve my skills and one day make a piece that’s so good someone wants on a card. Over the last two years, I’ve been deeply jealous of how amazing and hard working the Magic cosplayers are and that I should put my art to good use and make my own cosplays. And then there’s the playing of Magic. I miss the Gathering part of Magic. So this brings us to the bedrock of this piece. I hope to continue this blog steadily as time moves forward. I’m rarely ever satisfied or have my attention on any one project for too long but 2021 is a new year. And I hope that the title is a hint to the future. Whatever it is; whether it’s deck construction, art alters, or Magic cosplay, story, general discussion, that’s what I’m here for. It’s the Thrill of what I might work on next and I promise because I’m terrible right now at doing so, I’ll be sure to take pictures and try and stream when I can to keep myself honest about the whole deal. I hope you’ll all join me or at least join the Discord to yell at me.

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shunkashuutou · 4 years

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2020: ShuuKatsu, Spring Break, Corona, and FF7R

Hello everyone! Long time no update!

I meant to post something to say happy new year, but life just keeps getting busier and busier! So it’s time for some updates!

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- SHUUSHOKU KATSUDOU -

I’ll be heading into my final year of studies here soon, which means that it’s shuushoku katsudou (就職活動) season here. “Shuushoku katsudou” (often shortened to just “shuukatsu”) is basically job hunting, but unlike in America, it’s a very different process.

In America you can job hunt at any time of year, and it usually involves printing out (or even e-mailing) a copy of your resume, writing a cover letter, and sending in your application. However, if you’re a college student here in Japan, you have to secure a job BEFORE you graduate.

First of all, you have to write out your resume by hand on a specially-formatted paper that you get from your school, in pen with absolutely no mistakes and no white-out, each time you apply to a company. (Thankfully, being in the web industry, some of the places I’ve applied to are okay with you typing your information into their online form instead of having to hand-write a resume).

Here are some of my resumes in progress:

Once you have your beautifully written resume, you put on your very-dark-gray-but-not-pure-black suit (and 3 to 5 cm heels if you are female) and attend company setsumeikai (説明会), which are like information sessions in which the companies tell you about the work they do, their philosophy, etc. (I'm in a creative field so it doesn’t matter, but in marketing jobs or service industry jobs, you can’t have dyed hair or eyelash extensions, and you have to do a specific style of makeup) Then you turn in your hand-written resume, and if they’re interested, they’ll call you in for an interview. If you make it past the first interview, there’s usually a skills test or personality test (some of the personality tests I’ve taken have ridiculous questions, like “Do you get diarrhea often?”), a second interview, and then if you’ve made it past all of those steps and they still are interested in you, one final interview with an executive from the company. And you have to repeat this whole process for each company that you want to apply to. (Some of them also have group interviews, group work sessions, general skills tests that are like the SAT but in Japanese, etc as part of their hiring process)

And because of the very limited time period (usually from April to October of the year before you graduate) in which you can get recruited as a “newly graduating student” (新卒採用), if you miss this window and don’t get a job, some people pay to stay in college an additional year so they can try again the following year. In terms of the time frame, it’s almost more comparable to the American college search process than job hunting. And all of this happens while you’re still a student and still need to be attending classes and studying!

It’s quite different than job searching in America, so if anyone else you know in Japan says that they’re doing shuushoku katsudou, now you know what they’re going through!

And this year it’s especially tough due to the virus, since companies are having to move their info sessions and interviews online, delay them until things calm down, or are choosing not to recruit at all this year because the economy is unstable right now.

Which brings us to our next topic:

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- CORONA -

Mabs and I doing okay here in Osaka! The virus started really spreading when we were already on spring break (so we were already staying at home most of the time) and the start of our new school year has gotten pushed back from the beginning of April to the middle of May. Thankfully our jobs were able to move things online so we’re working remotely now.

Japan finally announced at state of emergency a few weeks ago, but the government doesn’t have the authority to force people to stay home, or to force businesses to close, they can only “strongly suggest” it. So many people are still having to commute to work on the trains, and I don’t think Japan is doing enough, but it does sound like most people are starting to take things more seriously and stay home when possible.

Honestly my routine hasn’t changed all that much from my normal spring break routine. (Not stepping foot outside my apartment for like 5 days at a time isn’t uncommon at all) I stay at home almost all the time and only go grocery shopping once a week anyway, so aside from the stress of hearing the news, and having to work remotely, my daily life hasn’t changed too much. (My mom’s trip to Japan at the end of March got cancelled though, which was a real bummer, but I really hope I can have her come visit for the spring cherry blossom season someday once all of the corona stuff calms down!)

But even though school and shuushoku katsudou is temporarily on hold, I have been extremely busy lately getting ready for the...

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- DRAMA RELEASE -

So I briefly mentioned it in a previous post, but last summer I had the opportunity to act as the main character in a new digital drama series!

The director and producer are currently making the last edits to the three pilot episodes, and they’ll be released on YouTube soon!

Here’s the official trailer! (※Warning for language. And I’m sure that those of you who know me in real life will be quite surprised; this character’s personality is like the opposite of mine, lol. But that’s what acting is all about!)

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Be sure to subscribe to the official channel on YouTube so you won’t miss the episodes when they come out!

I also had the opportunity to design and code the official website for the series! Go check it out here to start getting to know the story and characters!

I’ll be sure to post more about it when the episodes get released on YouTube, which should be soon!

I also finally made use of my acting salary and bought myself a PS4 and...

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- FINAL FANTASY VII REMAKE -

I started writing up this section of the post, but it got too long because I have a lot to say about this wonderful game, so for now here’s a photo of Mabs and I enjoying some milkshakes before playing the game! (These pudding-flavored milkshakes from McDonalds were amazing!)

We are having a blast playing FF7R! Mabs never played the original FF7 so I’m glad we can play the remake together, and it’s been fun to see her reactions to it! I’m really happy that she’s enjoying it too!

So expect a post about FF7R in the near future! (I promise it won’t be to long before I post again this time!)

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I hope you all are staying safe and healthy during this crazy time in the world! Wash your hands, wear a mask when you must go out, STAY HOME, and definitely play FF7R if you have a PS4!

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Also if you’d like to receive updates by e-mail whenever I update this blog, be sure to sign up for my blog update mailing address by sending an e-mail to:

(You don’t have to include any message, just a blank e-mail is fine, but if you’d like to tell me who you are that would be nice!)

#blogging #japan #life in japan #osaka #shuushoku katsudou #ff7r #april 2020 #2020

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mysticsparklewings · 4 years

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Fairy Enchanting‪

A bit later than I expected, but here we have the art that I used for the examples on my Commission Sheet! (Unoriginal title is unoriginal and also a pun based on "very enchanting") When I started thinking about putting together a commission sheet in the first place (which was something I wanted to do for the new year, as before I was just using a lengthy pricelist), I knew that I wanted to make a piece of art specifically for it and track my progress as I went, so that I would have an example for each stage in the process I take commissions for. And for the art, I more or less wanted to "go all out" since it's supposed to be an example, and I figure the example needs to be as close to top-notch as possible. Admittedly, I probably could've done even more than this, but me being me I procrastinated and ended up having less time to work on this that I initially expected, so... In deciding what the drawing would be, I also decided to return to my roots a little, and a do fairy as an homage to back when I used to do Winx art all the time. Likewise, as Enchantix to this day is my favorite transformation from the show, I drew heavy inspiration from it, and I'm sure that's so obvious that if you know the show I probably didn't have to point it out to you. Anyway. I actually didn't start completely from scratch with the sketch; I re-used this pose from a previous sketch I did that never saw a full-finished piece. I liked that other sketch okay, but it didn't feel like a "finish me" project. I did have to alter the feet because the original sketch was made with feet for ballet slippers (bigger heels, more rounded/curved toes, etc.) and much later on in the process I ended up angling the leg on the left more outward, as that felt more natural for the direction I was taking this new sketch in. In sketching all the bits that make this sketch otherwise unique from the old one, as I mentioned, I was taking heavy inspiration from Enchantix. One of my favorite parts of the transformation has always been the leg-wrap/barefoot sandals, for reasons I can't explain. So those were a must. I also really like how the Enchantix outfits tend to be short dresses that are more form-fitting at the top and more flowy and soft at the bottom. Here, I decided to bring the ribbony look on the leg wraps up into the bodice, and to frame the collar/shoulder area I used a sleeve & choker style similar to what I did for the dress for Ink Dance, which itself was based on a dress I actually own and love to pieces despite never getting a chance to wear it because of how fancy it is. The main difference for both of the drawing versions is that I skipped the lace overlay that connects the sleeves and choker, mostly because both pieces are traditional and drawing lace/mesh traditionally, especially when it's so teeny, is a nightmare I do not want to engage with. And the choker part fits nicely, as in Enchantix each fairy has a necklace (usually a choker) that holds their fairy dust bottle. I'm not sure if this fairy has one or not, but she very well could! Enchantix usually has long gloves, but I altered these to be shorter and fingerless (more like Magic Winx or Believix gloves) since this fairy is also based partially on myself, and I'd be more likely to wear that kind than the full-length formal gloves. And for the hair, as is maybe obvious, I was primarily inspired by Stella's for her Enchantix, since I've always loved that part of the transformation sequence for her's. Also, even though it doesn't look that way on my commission sheet, IRL I drew only one wing and left it separate, off to the side, to make positioning and flipping it easier. Once the sketch was done, I did try inking it traditionally/by hand once, and I just really wasn't happy with how it turned out. And I also realized I had drawn the skirt billowing/ruffling in completely the wrong direction anyway; It was moving to the left when it should've been moving to the right like the hair. So I had to take time out to fix that. As opposed to wasting more paper trying to ink traditionally after that fiasco, I instead went with what had been my gut instinct anyway; I scanned the sketch in and did the lines in Photoshop. Well, most of the lines. I was a dumb-dumb and when I did the lines for the wings, 1. it took forever because they're large curves everywhere and 2. I used a slightly bigger brush than for all the other lines, as I had mistakenly thought I was going to be re-sizing them significantly and the lines would be altered to for me when I did that. When I realized that wasn't the case, I did not want to have to redraw most of those curves again and risk not being able to get the right a second time. So I ended up booting a copy of the wings I'd already done into Paint Tool Sai and made use of the linework layers to redo the wings without having to draw the same line fifty times. Then I booted that back into Photoshop and adjusted the wings to be angled/aligned with the rest of the lines as I saw necessary. It was also at this point that I played around with positioning the leg on the left more outward than what it was on the sketch and ended up going with the position you see here. I could have then gone back and added weight to the lines in some places, but at this stage, I was already thinking that I wanted to print the lines out and use my digital lines to hopefully get cleaner traditional ones, as opposed to just printing the lines off outright. (Mostly because I wanted to use some super thick mixed media paper that I would bet serious money will not go through my printer.) That's what I ended up doing, and I have to say that attempt went a lot more smoothly than me trying to ink from the original sketch. And once I had the initial lines done, then I went back and thickened them in certain places. And I should probably mention here that the wings were a little tricky to figure out how to handle traditionally, as that's not something I've had to do very often. I ended up using my clear stardust gelly roll when I did the normal inking, and then, later on, I used colored pencils to go back over the outlines before coloring them in. After doing some tests, I started coloring with markers for the hair and skin, and a little colored pencil for some blush. I tried to get a little more bold with the shading than I usually do, which I'm sure still looks pretty tame compared to most. But I'd rather the shading be too light than too dark. Originally, I thought I was going to do all or mostly all of the coloring with alcohol markers. (Sidenote: is it just me or does it seem like there’s a lot of alcohol marker related stuff going on in the art world lately??) But then I did some testing with the lines I originally inked and didn’t like, and was reminded why I normally don’t use alcohol markers for gradients like the one on the skirt...frankly, I’m not very good at them...yet. Even though the test went better than expected, I still wasn’t happy with it. Then I tried a few more tests with watercolor, and that didn’t fare much better. Watercolor would’ve worked if the gradient wasn’t also supposed to be shaded, I think, but trying to shade it without using another supply wasn’t working. That left me with good ol' tried and true colored pencils. But colored pencils are relatively slow and textured, and I didn't really want that for the skin. The texture would've worked for the hair, but I didn't want to make the time investment for it either. And so I ended up sticking to my mixed media instincts and I used the colored pencil exclusively where I had to (on the dress so I could get the gradient for the skirt right) and then I used alcohol markers everywhere else, shading and all. With the alcohol marker doing most of the work, then I came back and added additional shading/highlights with the colored pencils as needed to everything except the skin. I added blush, but otherwise, I was quite pleased with how the skin turned out and didn't want to touch it for the risk of ruining it. The dress is supposed to be black/really dark gray, but I did brighten it up a bit with some of the blues from the skirt gradient as opposed to pulling out specific grays, so it definitely looks/feels more navy in the final product. Although my relatively dark/saturated color choices for her outfit made figuring out what to then do with the wings more challenging. I didn't want the wings to be the exact same colors as the rest of the drawing, because then they'd blend in too easily and be too distracting from the rest of the piece. But at the same time, I wanted them to match/look like they belong. (Again, similar to how the wings are in Enchantix) After some back-and-forth testing and a LOT of color sampling, I decided to color the wings in with alcohol markers in colors that were similar to her clothes but overall lighter/more pastel and outline them and the sections inside the wings again in colored pencil. Most of the colored pencil is slightly darker than the marker colors I picked, but I went with purple for the black/gray rims of the wings because I thought a dark gray or black would be too harsh. I'd already decided I wanted to do a slightly more complex background digitally, but even with that in mind, the traditional drawing still felt like it was missing one more thing after that. Namely, the wings didn't seem special enough. I realize that sounds a little weird; I was just talking about how I didn't want the wings to be too distracting, but I think there is a delicate balance to having them be special in the way fairy wings should be while still not overpowering everything else. And I'm not sure I achieved that, but I at least tried to. Though not a perfect solution, I ended up adding some metallic watercolor on top of the "true" (less purple-y) blue and pink sections on the wings. You can't really tell here on the scan, and what little you can appears to be the wrong color, but in person, both colors now how a lovely pink or blue sheen to them when you move the picture in the light. (The metallic paints, in this case, are very opalescent, so they're almost completely transparent when you see the flat color despite still have a really pretty metallic sheen in the light.) After that, I felt there wasn't much more I could do traditionally, so I scanned it and moved on to that background. At this point, I was kinda pressed for time because me being me, I had unintentionally put making my commission sheet off to the last minute. I really wanted to have it finished before the ball dropped on New Years' Eve ("new year, new me" and all that jazz), and I still hadn't finished my example art by sunset time the day of. So I had to keep things moving. Early on, I'd had the idea to either digitally make a slightly more complex (but not too complex; I wanted to keep at least a little of the sanity I have left) background or perhaps make a special watercolor piece to use as the background. Unfortunately, I just didn't have the time for that anymore if I wanted to have the commission sheet finished by my self-imposed deadline. (And if we're splitting hairs, in theory, I could still go back and change the background if I wanted to, for reasons I'm about to go over, so of all the things to get rush-cut that's really not so bad.) What I ended up doing instead was taking some of the left side of my Starfall Mountains painting (I was looking for a background-type thing I'd already done/made that would suit this drawing or that I could quickly tailor to make it work, and I'm just as surprised as anyone else that this frustrating tiny painting ended up being the one I liked best of my options) and I blew it up to comfortable cover the background here, flipped it around so the colors would flow a bit better, and used the hue/saturation slider to make it more of teal color for a little more contrast. But of course, there was still just one more thing missing, even after all that. After a little tinkering, I decided I didn't like trying to making the wings transparent (I could do it, I just didn't like the way it looked in this case), so I went in and added a touch of sparkles digitally to both tie them more into the piece as a whole and to give them a little more pizzazz. And finally, blessedly after all of that, the artwork was finished, I was very happy with it, and I could move on to making the actual commission sheet. I have to say, for as rushed as it was towards the end, I do really like how it turned out. More particularly I like just how blended both digital and traditional art ended up being here. To me, this is the next step beyond what I was able to do for mixing digital and traditional art with my Doodle Moon piece, and if I weren't currently in the middle of a tablet crisis, I'd really want to do more with this concept of going back and forth between the two on one artwork. However because of the tablet situation, the thought of really trying to do that right now kinda fills me with dread, so we're gonna have to wait a little while on that. I do also really like the anatomy/proportions in this. Which is not something I normally feel comfortable saying. It's not the best art I've ever made or anything, but looking at it makes me happy. It's good to see it finished and it's good to think of where a lot of the ideas for it came from. (Re: Nostalgia for my life a few years ago) I'm not sure if I will since it kinda counts but also kinda doesn't(?), but I'm tempted to put this and some of my old Enchantix drawings up on the "Draw This Again" template, just to show how far I've come. I'm still thinking about it, we'll see. Speaking of "we'll see," I got word that the sketchbooks from the contest I made Designiest Design for back in October are finally in, which means the prize packs should be sent out anytime now! I'm excited to see how the sketchbooks turned out and get my hands on the Powder Pack and see how said powders work! I was admittedly starting to wonder how that was coming along, so that was some good news and a nice surprise I'd really been needing here lately. Rest assured, there will almost definitely be an art piece talking about that stuff once I have it in my hands!

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ibelieveinahappilyeverafter · 4 years

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Writing Commission - A Gift of Sunshine - Chapter 5

Merry (late) Christmas, Happy Holidays, and Blessed Yule! My apologies for such a delay in the update today, but here we are at last! As apology and a gift, take a double chapter update!

Also, a few of you expressed concern over where the story is going considering there's so many chapters left, and, well... let's just say that good things will come in the end. :)

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Summary: It is the worst day of fifteen-year-old Aizawa Shouta’s life when he trudges home after a failed entrance test to U.A. – the school made for heroes. His worst day abruptly turns strange, however, when he gets home to find a beautiful sword on his bed with a scroll attached that is addressed from his grandfather.

It turns out that his entire family was descended from a samurai (unsurprising considering he lived in Japan) and the sword was meant to help him become a hero. Shouta hadn’t been expecting the sword to talk, however, and he especially hadn’t expected the sword to have a voice as warm as sunshine itself.

It’s a long journey to become a hero like he wants, but Shouta has a feeling that he and Hizashi are going to do just fine.

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Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Relationship: Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic/Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead

Characters: Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead

Rating: Teen Audiences

Word Count (Total): 35,935

Transaction Amount: $250 (USD)

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Check out my writing commission information here! Pledge to my Patreon to get exclusive content!

Read and follow the story on AO3!

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<<Previous Chapter>> <<Next Chapter>>

Chapter Five

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Staring down at the mounds of disorganized paperwork in his lap, Shouta idly bit down on his pen and wondered, if he bit hard enough to break the pen and swallow some of the ink, if that would be enough to relieve him of having to deal with the stress of what would surely be his death. Forget villains and falling buildings, it would be the paperwork that would kill him in his career as a pro-hero.

“My, my, what a terrifying scowl, Eraserhead!” Twitching at the words that might as well have been purred out, Shouta glanced up to see ‘Midnight’ and ‘Present Mic’ cheerfully waving at him from his doorway, Nemuri holding Hizashi’s sword in one hand and a bag of take-out in the other. He regretted the day he gave his friends keys to where he lived. “Aw, aren’t you happy to see us? See, see, we even brought you back dinner!”

Shouta managed to withhold his growl, instead turning back to his paperwork with a silent vow that he would burn it, his apartment, and everything inside to the ground if the police so much as lost a single piece of paper once he turned it in; hell, he’d burn the police station down, too. Plus Ultra, and all.

“Shouta, please tell me you’ve actually slept instead of just doing paperwork,” Nemuri was striding over with a very no-nonsense Tensei attitude, dropping Hizashi’s sword into his lap before starting to open and spread out the multiple containers of food that was far too much for two people. “You’re supposed to be resting or else that broken leg of yours is never going to heal!”

“I don’t need rest. I need to get this work done,” Shouta grunted, adjusting the sword to where he was still free to do his paperwork even as he felt Hizashi’s arms curl around his shoulders, a single glance up showing the man smiling down at him.

Hizashi had ‘changed’ into simple clothing that looked soft and easy to move in and his hair, as well, was down out of its ‘hero style’ and lightly pulled out of his face, glasses low on the bridge of his nose; which was still ridiculous. Why did a spirit need glasses? Right. Shouta was getting distracted. He made sure to refocus by glaring at Hizashi with a muttered, “You don’t even start.”

“Aw, what’s wrong, Starlight?” Instead of Nemuri’s over-the-top and sexual tone that coated her purred out words, Hizashi’s was always so much softer and more genuine, the words near whispered against his cheek. The pressure was never anything that could be mistaken as another person touching him, but it was never devoid of warmth, either. It was also just… Hizashi. “Are you still upset Nem and I had to take over?”

“According to what the police are constantly telling me, you don’t legally exist,” Shouta complained, relaxing into Hizashi’s soft hugs and kisses as Nemuri fluffed his pillows, which had been fine, before starting to shove food at him. “I have a broken leg and an appointment with a healer’s quirk tomorrow. Stop fussing.”

“I am not fussing,” Nemuri frowned, the lie said as if she truly believed it. “Is that why you’re so wound up? Just say you teamed up with me and Present Mic for this one and be done with it!”

“You do know that a lot of heroes don’t know if ‘Present Mic’ is even real or not, don’t you?” Shouta felt a swat to his side that made him flinch before he was glaring at Hizashi again, who gestured for him to eat. “You need to stop possessing other pros when they show up on a crime scene.”

“Good luck with that,” Nemuri muttered ‘quietly,’ Shouta throwing her a glare of her own as the woman grabbed her own food and squirmed around on the couch to be able to both touch the sword and not touch his broken leg.

Hizashi, meanwhile, was whining again, “What? No! Shouta, baby, please, it’s not my fault that all of our co-workers are essentially idiots and can’t be bothered to listen to a decent plan without ego getting in the way.” While Nemuri snorted hard enough that it no doubt had hurt, Shouta hid his own laughter with a couple bites of food. “Technically, I do legally exist since I was born in this country. It was just, uh… a long time ago.”

“Unless you can find a birth or death certificate, I don’t think telling them that will help,” Shouta sighed, unable to help the smile he could feel forming when Hizashi pressed a soft kiss against his cheek. “How was the raid? I assume it went fine since neither of you are complaining about dying.”

Then again, all of Shouta’s friends were idiots. Tensei had broken an arm and continued to fight for a full two hours before he had even noticed what had happened - the same Tensei who had cried when getting a papercut a few weeks back, as Shouta recalled. All in all, he wouldn’t be surprised if his idiots were actively dying while acting like everything was fine.

Hizashi, at least, knew him too well as always, already giving a quiet laugh even as he answered. “We’re fine, Shou-chan. Besides, you know I’d forcibly control Nem and take her to the hospital if I thought she needed it.”

“Hey! You said you’d never possess me without consent unless it was an emergency,” Nemuri accused, dramatic ‘heartbroken’ tone to her words that sounded fake as could be. It was enough to make Hizashi flounder, though, Shouta doing nothing beyond watching his boyfriend make excuses and reassure an ‘inconsolable’ Nemuri. He honestly wasn’t sure if Hizashi bought it, or if he had too much fun playing along to the drama; either one was believable with these two.

All their dramatics gave Shouta time to focus back on his paperwork, though, managing to finish off another sheet along with another few bites of food as he thought over the problem that was teaming up with ‘Present Mic.’

While Hizashi technically had a hero license due to Nezu’s meddling and some very bemused scorers for the actual test they had taken, they were still left with the problem that Present Mic wasn’t ‘real’ to most people. Hizashi’s license kept them from being declared villains-in-the-making due to all the possession that took place during their fights, but, to Shouta’s knowledge, all the police stations in over a dozen prefectures despised their teamwork and methods.

Getting Hizashi registered as Present Mic had started as Shouta just wanting to make sure Hizashi was given the proper credit he was due, as the two of them really did work as a duo in their careers now, but it had ended up as one large headache; especially with the gaggle of pro-hero children who seemed to think that they were being mind controlled even after their ‘team ups.’

“If you keep scowling like that then eventually it’s gonna stick,” Hizashi teased, patting at Shouta’s cheek and laughing when Shouta swatted him off. “C’mon, it’s not that bad! Legally they can’t do shit to us, after all.”

“Legally they can make my life a living nightmare with the paperwork they give me and then ‘lose,’” Shouta snorted, reaching for another container of food absently and starting in on that one as well, idly wondering if he should ask Nezu if there were any plans to turn the entire system digital once and for all. Then again, his work would probably just be deleted out of spite. “Maybe we should prove a point and burn one of the stations down.”

“You just need to smile through it, Shouta,” Nemuri sighed, as if she wasn’t rising in popularity and already had a devoted following for her hero image. “Oh! That reminds me! Your agency’s publicist contacted me earlier today!”

“Megumi-san? Why does she have your number?” It wasn’t unheard of for publicists to have some heroes get in contact with others depending on patrol schedules and timing, but that was only if the heroes worked for the same agency. “Is something wrong?”

Nemuri grinned and Shouta felt mildly scared at the same moment Hizashi’s arms tightened around him. “She wanted me to remind you boys that you have an interview tomorrow.”

“Ah. I’m not going.” Shouta took another bite of food, chewing slowly and savoring Nemuri’s shocked and offended expression. Leave it to a media hero to be offended at the idea of avoiding them. “My leg is broken.”

“That’s why Megumi-san contacted me to let me know that your interview was rescheduled to be after your appointment which, like you said earlier, will heal your leg up the rest of the way.” Humming to show he had heard, Shouta idly wondered if breaking another leg would be considered a sign of madness. “And, since I’m such a good best friend, I’ll even be escorting you from the hospital to the station!”

There was a little snicker from Hizashi and Shouta would have thrown the rest of his food in the spirit’s face if it wouldn’t just go through him and stain the carpet. As it was, Shouta made sure to pinch his side until he earned an unflattering yelp. “Aw, c’mon, Shou-chan! This is a great opportunity to present a better image for underground heroes - you won’t even be on television! It’s just for a magazine!”

“What part of underground hero do you two still not get? I’m not supposed to be known at all, let alone out and doing interviews like some ranked hero who never learned that this job is about more than just a pretty smile.” His friends, horrible creatures that they were, didn’t even give his speech anything beyond an eyeroll. They could burn when Shouta set fire to the police station, he decided. “It’s a bad idea.”

“Just let Hizashi take over if you’re so worried about it,” Nemuri sighed, waving her chopsticks lazily as if that wasn’t the worst idea in the world. “He, at least, is good at dealing with the media.”

Shouta laughed at that, unable to help himself as he half-grinned at Nemuri, “Are you kidding? Half the time it’s him who’s pushing me to let loose on the media because they’re ‘trespassing on a crime scene.’”

“Well, that is true,” Nemuri admitted. “But he’s better at acting like he likes the media, unlike you, who does nothing whatsoever to hide his disdain.” Shouta hummed, finishing off the last bite of food as spitefully as he could manage. “Look, it’s just one short interview about life as an underground hero. You’ll be in and out in under an hour at most.”

“It’s a good chance at getting underground heroes seen in a better light,” Hizashi pointed out, a hand running through Shouta’s hair in a gesture that almost had him melting. “I think it’ll be good.”

Ah, well… If Hizashi wanted to do it then Shouta supposed that was that. “If you’re underground you shouldn’t be in any light,” Shouta complained one last time, knowing that the other two knew he had given in just by their grins.

Still, an hour talking about underground heroes was something he could handle well enough. Really, Shouta was sure it wouldn’t be that bad.

⁂

Shouta, with as much hatred, annoyance, and sheer panic as he could muster, clearly and loudly thought the words, This is your fault.

“If we wanna get technical here, it’d be our publicist’s fault,” Hizashi grumbled, sitting on the arm of the armchair Shouta had been forced into the moment he stepped in the room he had been directed to for his interview.

After everything had been explained, Shouta had expected a frazzled intern with too many things to do and too little time on their hands to bother asking too many questions. Instead his interview was being conducted by someone with over a decade of experience, eyes that felt like they were waiting for him to slip up, and a recording device that had been on since the moment he walked into the room.

“You think we could get this chick to sign up for recon at the agency,” Hizashi half-mumbled to himself, Shouta taking small solstice in the feeling of Hizashi leaning against his side and arm and staying close by. “She’s fucking ruthless and I feel like half of ‘em would love her.”

The interviewer, Tanaka, was shuffling through what looked like a plan of attack in bullet point format after Shouta had vaguely explained the differences between acceptable risks and levels of violence and how it changed between ‘media’ heroes and those who worked underground. Tanaka had shown no expression and Shouta was half-wondering if he and his entire agency would be sued.

“So, Aizawa-san, it’s said that you’re officially registered as part of a hero duo with the hero ‘Present Mic,’ but research shows that there’s no record of him beyond a registered hero license dated the same as yours. Care to elaborate?”

Deciding the answer ‘not really’ wouldn’t be sufficient, Shouta tried to relax as he gave a calm answer, “Present Mic and I went to school together at U.A. and formed a duo after we graduated. He’s a more private person than I am, so it’s unsurprising there’s not much information on him.”

Hizashi, at least, found Shouta’s comment about him being ‘private’ as amusing as Shouta thought it was, laughing where Shouta wasn’t able to. “I’ll remember you said that so I can have you back me up next time Tensei yells at me for oversharing.”

“And what of the rumors that your partnership is a romantic one and that you two have been together since your school days?” Tanaka remained completely serious and Shouta took a moment to force himself to stay blank and calm even as Hizashi sputtered beside him, Shouta wanting to do much the same.

“May I ask as to where these rumors originated beyond any base speculation?” Because, yes, alright, every hero fan assumed that all hero duos were romantic at one point or another in their lives if they weren’t siblings, but for an interviewer to just come out and ask? Shouta wasn’t sure if anyone besides Tensei, Nemuri, and possibly Nezu even knew that he and Hizashi were together. Well, Shukuchi might have, but Shouta was sure his former mentor had done his best to pretend they hadn’t been together.

“It’s been a matter of speculation for quite some time in the pro hero circles, especially those that surround underground heroes. I was wondering if you would be able to confirm any of these rumors or lay them to rest.” Hizashi was right. Tanaka was ruthless.

“Tell her that you’re dating your sword. She might be freaked out enough to end the interview early so we can finally leave,” Hizashi snickered, Shouta doing his best to not glare at him or give in to the urge to pinch him.

As it was, he took a moment to center himself before trying to appear as relaxed as possible, leaving his answer at a simple, “No.”

“I see.” Ah, so no was the wrong answer. Good to know for the future, he supposed. “Continuing on with the subject, do you feel comfortable being in a relationship as a pro hero?”

“Yes, I feel comfortable with the possibility of being in a relationship, and many other heroes will say the same. While as an underground hero I’m afforded more secrecy and protection, other heroes have been taught and learned how to separate their civilian life and their hero life in order to have normal, healthy relationships.”

Hizashi gave a snort of laughter, nudging at Shouta, “I’m sure Nezu will be proud to know his favorite student remembered all of his lectures by heart.” The urge to shove him off the chair was overwhelming.

“Yet statistics have shown that relationships involving heroes often fail and last no longer than six months to a year, and these numbers only shrink when it comes to underground heroes and the secrecy involving their work. What do you think about this?”

“Jesus,” Hizashi muttered, no doubt feeling the same disgust Shouta was. “It’s always about the fucking romance angle, isn’t it? Isn’t she supposed to be asking you about, you know, hero work?”

Shouta mumbled a near voiceless, “She’s supposed to.” before speaking normally. “I think that relationships require work and communication no matter the circumstances.”

A gleam entered Tanaka’s eye and Shouta felt something like ice slide into his veins even as he made a note to yell at Megumi later. “So, you’re saying you condone lying to your partner as that’s what’s required of pro hero relationships.”

“Shouta,” Hizashi half-sang, something sharp and dangerous in his tone as Shouta felt the man’s hand curl around his wrist. “Shouta, you should let me take over for a few minutes.” Shouta was half-tempted, but he was pretty sure yelling at an interviewer would be better than cutting her open with a sword.

“In no capacity did I say that lying to one’s partner is required for a relationship in which one party is a pro hero. There are some things that can’t be shared such as case details, yes, but I doubt your partner needs to know about the drug ring you’re tracking in order to feel secure in the relationship.”

“But at one point or another lying would simply have to come into play. You yourself mentioned in this interview that being an underground hero is dangerous work, and that there’s always the chance that those around you will be in some form of danger.”

Shouta could feel Hizashi mentally pushing at him, desperately wanting to take over and say his own piece. Shouta calmly brushed the mental presence away, standing up at the same time before catching Tanaka’s gaze and not letting go.

“As surprising as this might come to someone like you, a relationship can exist without the need for lies and secrecy, as both myself and my partner of five years can testify to. If that will be all, Tanaka-san, I have work to do.”

Shouta was already out the door and slamming it shut behind him before he had to listen to that woman’s voice for any longer, anger carrying him all the way back to their apartment before Shouta was dropping onto the couch and scrubbing a hand down his face, along with a muttered, “Megumi is going to kill us for this.”

There was no answering remark or comment and that realization alone had Shouta darting up, hand closing tight around the sheath of the sword as he quickly looked around for Hizashi who… was staring at him. Silently.

Taking a moment to make sure neither of them were dying and Shouta hadn’t said something worthy of the silent treatment, he finally broke the silence with a quiet, “What’s wrong, Sunshine?” Because it was possible that after all of that Hizashi was even more upset than he was.

“No- No, no, it’s nothing bad, I just- I didn’t-” Hizashi floundered, somehow still soft and quiet even as another part of him seemed overwhelmed and manic. “I… I knew you cared I just didn’t know… I never thought you’d admit you cared to anyone who didn’t know, let alone a reporter. I mean, I’m- I’m not exactly, you know- It’s not like it counts.”

Hoping he was wrong about what Hizashi’s fumbling words could mean, Shouta stood up slowly and moved until he was in front of Hizashi, cutting off the man’s panicked pacing. “‘Zashi. I can’t answer any questions you have if you can’t tell me what those questions are. What doesn’t count?”

“Us! We don’t count!” Hizashi looked a few seconds away from crying and Shouta felt as if the air had been stolen from his lungs. “I’m nothing more or less than a ghost, Shouta, whatever happens between us is just- It’s nothing!”

Hizashi’s shout seemed to ring the air for what felt like an eternity, Shouta taking a slow, calm breath before he did something stupid like throw the sword out the closest window. He loved his boyfriend deeply, after all, even if he was the biggest idiot within all of Japan.

“Alright, then.” Taking another step closer towards Hizashi, Shouta narrowed his eyes when he saw the man take a stumbling step back. That alone, more than anything else, spoke volumes. “Tell me, while looking me in the eye, that our relationship means nothing to you.”

A flash and, like always, the manic and panicked energy seemed to leave Hizashi all at once, Shouta’s arms opening at once as Hizashi fell into them with a muffled sob that hurt more than anything else. It hurt because they had been together for years and Shouta still hadn’t seen just how unsure Hizashi was in what they were to each other.

“You’ve been getting caught up in your head, Sunshine,” Shouta said softly, running a hand through Hizashi’s hair and unable to stop the soft joy and awe he felt as it slid through his fingers. So many years of being able to touch and he still wasn’t over it. “Why are you really so upset? Because I mentioned I had a partner?”

Hizashi managed to cut off what sounded like another forming sob, instead replacing it with a choked off, “Yes.” Shouta felt Hizashi’s nails dig into him, frantic and terrified. “Of course I’m upset, Shouta, because you saying that to someone like her makes it real.”

Pulling back after a bit of a struggle, Shouta cupped Hizashi’s cheek with his free hand at once, frowning at the tear stains and red-rimmed eyes and shuddering breaths. For as much as he claimed he was nothing more than a ghost, Hizashi was the most human out of all of them. “And? Why does that make you upset? I need you to explain it to me, Hizashi. Why-”

“Because that means it’s only going to hurt more when you’re gone.” The words had Shouta snapping his mouth shut, surprised due to the sheer fact that Hizashi rarely, if ever, talked about what would happen after Shouta was… gone. “I love you so much, Shouta, so much that most days it hurts. I’ve never felt like this before and I know that one day, no matter how far away, I’ll lose this feeling-”

“No.” For once, Shouta’s mouth moved first, logic the furthest thing from his mind. “That’s… No. That’s not how it’s going to work.” Shouta leaned their foreheads together gently, smiling even as he saw Hizashi’s confused expression. “That’s not what’s going to happen because no matter what I’ll never… I’ll never stop loving you.” Emotions were never Shouta’s strong suit, but for Hizashi… He could always be strong for Hizashi. “Will you ever stop loving me-?”

“Of course not!” The enraged squawk had Shouta bursting into laughter, unable to stop himself from leaning in to kiss Hizashi softly, tasting the reluctant smile more than anything else.

“Then how are you going to lose this feeling?” Shouta asked softly, feeling embarrassment squirm around inside him as Hizashi’s grief faded for a soft awe that Shouta had only ever seen directed at him. “I’ll be gone one day, and it’s not always going to be easy, but for right now… I’m here. I’m here and I love you.”

Hizashi gave another choked cry, Shouta feeling the helpless smile on his face as he looked at this man he was so ridiculously in love with. “Do you think that’ll be enough, Sunshine?”

“What the hell, Shouta, you can’t just do that we’ve talked about this! You know what happens when you get like this! You get emotional and then I get emotional and-” It was impossible to stop his laughter at Hizashi’s complaints, Shouta finally letting him go with one last kiss before heading towards the bedroom.

“Come on, drama queen, let’s get some rest before our next patrol. If we’re lucky we have at least a week before Nemuri finds out what I said in that interview and comes after me.” Nemuri would probably try to make their relationship ‘public,’ nevermind how she would manage to do something like that. Shouta wouldn’t put it past the witch.

“Excuse you, I am not- Your phone is buzzing.” Pausing to glance back, Shouta looked around before noticing his phone on the couch where it had no doubt fallen out of his pocket, buzzing with text message after text message.

“So it is.” Shouta would deal with it after his nap. “Come on. Nap time.” There was a snort of laughter that Shouta graciously chose to ignore.

“Oh! It’s Nem!” Of course it was the witch. She had probably felt Shouta thinking poorly of her. “She’s asking about the… interview…”

Hearing the trailing silence and feeling a jolt of emotion that was almost enough to knock him off his feet, Shouta was spinning around and getting ready for anything, gaze quickly finding Hizashi, who was standing next to the couch with Shouta’s phone in his hand.

“Hizashi? What’s wrong? What happened?” It was possible Nemuri had been texting about an emergency, but she would typically call, in that case. The emotion had definitely come from Hizashi, but Shouta had no idea what it was about when Hizashi was doing nothing more than standing there and staring down at… at Shouta’s phone that he was holding. “Oh.”

Shouta scratched at his cheek for a moment, staring at Hizashi holding a physical object which, in their hard-learned experience, should be impossible. Finally, after what felt like too long, Shouta nodded to himself.

“Come to bed and take a nap with me and I’ll let you pretend to be me when you text her. We’ll see how long it takes her to realize it’s you.” Shouta was once again heading towards the bedroom, smiling as he heard Hizashi’s loud laughter following after him. All in all, Shouta supposed he wouldn’t yell at Megumi too badly.

#bnha #boku no hero academia #mha #my hero academia #erasermic #a gift of sunshine #original

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jjonassevilla · 4 years

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4 Lessons We Learned in 2019 (and How Marketers Can Apply Them in 2020)

It’s been a heck of a year, hasn’t it? And it’s not over yet.

Even if you’re still knee-deep in holiday and end-of-year promotions, it makes sense to take time to pause. Now’s the time to reflect on the challenges, opportunities, and accomplishments of 2019—before the crazy starts up again.

With that in mind, we’re revisiting the big lessons drawn from our most popular pieces on digital marketing and landing pages. For each, we’ll talk about how you can best apply these lessons in 2020 and beyond.

Lesson 1: Slow page speed is killing your conversions.

Unbounce predicted that 2019 would be “the year when the difference between fast and slow content becomes the difference between showing up in the search results (whether paid or organic) or disappearing completely.”

In January, we also published Think Fast: The 2019 Page Speed Report to shed some light on how slow loading times are impacting conversion rates.

We wanted to know where improving page speed was falling in the marketers’ yearly priority lists—as well as what their customers experience (and how they behave) when a website is slow to load.

This research stirred up all kinds of reasons why you definitely need to keep speed in mind when creating landing pages. For instance, Google says 53% of visitors will bounce after three seconds of waiting. But our check-in at the Call to Action Conference in late 2018 revealed that 85% of participants’ pages came in slower than 5 seconds at a 3G connection. (We’re not naming names, but some took more than 20 seconds.)

The survey results also revealed that consumers are pretty frank about the impact that slow ecomm sites can have on their willingness to buy:

Source: Think Fast: The 2019 Page Speed Report (Stats and Trends For Marketers)

What surprised us most, however, is that improving load times remains an overlooked way of optimizing the visitor experience. Very few marketers we surveyed identified it as a priority for the year, even though those who did have likely seen the benefits.

What Marketers Can Do in 2020

The thing is, these page speed concerns aren’t going away.

The average time for a web page to load is actually slower at the end of 2019 than it was a year ago. Some marketers have resisted making big improvements to loading times in the hopes that technology will save them (“5G is coming any day now!”). But speed remains a competitive differentiator.

Google hasn’t backed away from forcing the issue, either. They’ve always said that speed matters, but in November, they outlined plans to indicate when a site has been historically slow to load using badges in Chrome: “We think the web can do better and want to help users understand when a site may load slowly, while rewarding sites delivering fast experiences.”

Source: Google Chromium Blog

All of this adds up to a continued need to boost speed on your landing pages and website. To help, Unbounce’s Garrett Hughes put together a shortlist of page speed fixes (plus a downloadable checklist). And if you want to achieve blazing speeds on mobile devices, you’ll also want to investigate using Accelerated Mobile Pages (AMP) as well.

Marketers need to get faster and stay that way.

Let’s make speeding up a habit in 2020.