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midorishinji · 8 months

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Disappearance act - chapter III

Geto observed her more carefully, trying to decide whether she was being serious or not. — Killing non-sorcerers? — It's an option, but I don't take it seriously. Do you? — Yuki pressed him with a loaded question. Suguru Geto thought of them all — Shoko, Nanami, Haibara, Riko, Kuroi, his parents, Satoru — and his chest filled with an unbearable pain, but also an incredibly monumental love, so much that it felt like it would stretch and burst at the seams of his heart that could not contain it. He thought of his father again, reading him "Night on the Galactic Railroad" when he was young, and he thought of Satoru reading his own copy now during his leisure nights. He thought of Giovanni and Campanella, and of the Scorpio of the night sky, and of the nobility of sacrifice, of setting yourself on fire to warm the world.

Satosugu ｜Finalized｜Long fic｜Also being published in Portuguese and on AO3

Chapters: I - II - III - IV - V - VI - VII - VIII - IX - X - XI - XII - XIII - XIV - XV - XVI - XVII

Chapter III: it's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness

A day of work left until the break. Professor Yaga was surprised as to why two of his best students decided to take some time off at the same time, but he rather not question it: he knew they were both overloaded with missions, as everyone was, in fact; Shoko rarely went out into combat, her skill was too precious for her to risk it all in the field, and the younger students could not meet the ever-increasing demand for exorcisms on their own... Most of the burden still fell on the shoulders of Suguru and Satoru, even more so when it came to the most complex missions and the strongest spirits. He let them go, not only because he agreed they were tired, but because he knew there was something behind their sudden desire to rest.

Masamichi Yaga, from the beginning, suspected that the Time Vessel Association had not taken both Riko and Misato's bodies. Riko’s, well, it was possible: she was the target, and her corpse would prove that they had accomplished the mission; but Misato, what did they care about her? She was nothing more than a casualty, another life lost in a senseless war. That whole story was suspicious and weird, and he knew very well about Satoru Gojo's absurd propensity for getting into trouble and doing things his way. Despite this, he trusted Geto, who had always been the more correct of the two; he trusted that they had done the right thing.

The elders pressed him for answers, which he could not provide. And then the cult came forward saying that they had taken the bodies of the two victims. That didn't make sense, but it was enough to appease the elders' anger. Secretly, Yaga hoped that his two best students had not gone astray and were helping the Time Vessel Association. He hoped for this when he smelled burned paper on Geto's clothes one morning, after he burned the letter received by the cult. He dreamed of this when he saw Satoru return, happier, from a mission in Okinawa. He trusted that the respect and admiration with which the other students — Shoko, Nanami, Haibara — still treated them was because they would never be able to take two innocent lives.

The special vacation request was just the confirmation he needed. A small spy doll placed strategically on a shelf caught a phrase that didn't explain anything, although it was enough to fill him with relief: “they’re waiting for us, for Riko's birthday party”. Masamichi Yaga authorized their release.

At that moment, Shoko Ieiri and Suguru Geto were in the Jujutsu High library. Shoko had been studying for hours for her university entrance exams — she planned to continue studying, which would certainly improve her skills with the Reverse Cursed Technique — and her body was buried among dozens of books, papers, and coffee cups that were piling up higher and higher. Geto contributed to that Babylonian tower that was about to collapse by bringing her another cup of coffee, and placing it in front of her.

— You have no idea how difficult nephrology is... — Shoko muttered, annoyed — All those damn ions that need to enter and exit in the right place in the renal tubules, who cares? The Reverse Cursed Technique should handle this on its own, without needing me to know where to place each cell.

Geto still vaguely remembered his biology lessons, although nothing from nephrology, specifically. What he could offer now was coffee and a pleasant smile. — You’re studying a lot these days… You need to rest sometimes.

— Oh, don't worry, I will. I'm gonna pass the college entrance exam and from then on, I'm gonna cheat on every test, I just need a diploma. — Shoko replied, nonchalantly.

He suppressed a laugh, afraid to break the silence the environment demanded. — You're funny, Shoko. The worst part is that I know you're serious... Do you really need to know all this to heal people?

— If you want to do it the right way, you have to, or you'll end up putting all the organs on the wrong side, or when it comes to rebuilding someone's arm, you'll forget to put all the nerves in and leave a part unable to move or feel. — Shoko explained, between sips of her coffee — It's different from healing yourself. You know exactly where it hurts, and what's missing, as if the memory is in all of your cells, so it's not a conscious effort.

This made him thoughtful. — It must be great to be able to heal other people.

She shrugged. — Yeah, but it comes at a cost. When you swallow the spirits you’ve exorcised, you feel that too, don't you? The price.

The price to be paid was disgusting, harrowing, devouring each spirit was like eating a cloth used to clean someone else's vomit. The feeling never gets better, and it never goes away. Everything comes at a cost. — Yeah. — Suguru muttered.

— When I use the Reverse Cursed Technique, I am using the pain of the person who is injured to heal them. I need to take this pain, swallow it all as if it were mine. I need to feel it, or it doesn't work.

— Does it ever get better?

Shoko shook her head negatively. — No. You just get used to it. Before, healing a broken leg was difficult because I felt like it was my leg, my pain. Now I can do it because I feel the pain, but it's no longer the highest point on the scale for me, it doesn't matter anymore, there are worse things to feel, so I can ignore it. That's why healing a person when they're on the verge of death is so difficult... You need to bear what they're suffering and then some so you don't lose control.

— Every technique has its downside. — Geto agreed, kindly.

— I know. Satoru always has a headache because of his technique. It's as if his brain is trying to process information from a hundred realities at the same time, every second he has the technique activated. It's too much, even for him. Good thing he's learning how to use the Reverse Cursed Technique so he can do damage control when I'm not around, or he'd have, I don't know, a stroke before he's eighteen. — she said, finishing her coffee.

That's why he always eats sweets and energy drinks, to make his physical body cope with the information overload, that's what Geto thought. He had seen Satoru faint more times than he could count, but it had become rarer as time passed. Each of them bore their burden in silence.

Getting up from his chair, Geto smiled. — Tomorrow Satoru and I are going on vacation. Do you want something as a gift?

Shoko seemed to contemplate the possibilities for a second. — Um... Anything, as long as it's not sweet. Satoru does this on purpose, you know, he brings back a bunch of sweets saying they’re for me just because I don't eat them, and then he’ll eat them behind my back...

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #gojo satoru #geto suguru #satosugu #nanami kento #haibara yu #shoko ieiri #toji fushiguro #megumi fushiguro #kenjaku #writing #fanfiction #jjk fanfic

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live-laugh-loverpool · 1 year

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Ex-Arsenal Players Group Chat

Random idea that appeared in my head lol. For all Arsenal fans thinking of the ex-players, this is it.

Matteo🕺✨: Greetings humans!

Laca: why do I have a bad feeling about this

Batman: Why am I even in here I'm not at Arsenal anymore

Sead: This is EX-Arsenal players group chat, idiot

Laca: Don’t call Pierre an idiot 🙁

Batman: Thx bro

Laca: Only I can call you an idiot

Nuno: I’m still TECHNICALLY a Arsenal player

Matteo🕺✨: Not with Artichoke around

Sead: Don’t you mean Arteta?

Matteo🕺✨: I call him that

Emery: Good evening

Matteo🕺✨: EMERY

Laca: Hey ex-boss 👋 What are you doing here?

Matteo🕺✨: Only he and I know 😏

The Ox: this is ridiculous

The Ox: Some of us have moved on and you bring us back to the days of Europa League?

Laca: The way Liverpool are playing, you may be reacquainted with Europa League faster than you think

Batman: Don’t worry, Ox—some of us may not be in Europe at all this year

Sead: I’m not shocked 😣

Matteo🕺✨: I’d rather skip Europe than stay with Tudor

Nuno: Agreed

Nuno: The guy couldn’t put out a winning XI if you paid him

Matteo🕺✨: 🙄 Nuno they literally DO pay him to put out a winning XI

Batman: And he STILL gets paid?

Bernd: What a miracle

Willian: OI HOMBRES

David: You called, Willi?

Willian: OMG DAVID I WAS SO WORRIED ABOUT YOU BEING ALL ALONE

Matteo🕺✨: This just as well may turn into the “David and Willian reunion chat”

Bernd: How’s Chelsea, Pierre?

Batman: 😡 MUST WE DISCUSS THAT

Bernd: Alright, moving on 🙄 How’s Lyon, Laca?

Laca: Eight in Ligue 1

Laca: And Dejan’s here now

The Ox: Dejan’s with you?

The Ox: WHY isn’t he here now?

David: Because he didn’t play at Arsenal

Petr: Hello guys 🙂

Laca: PETR CECH

David: AT LAST, A BRAIN CELL

Petr: 😣 Have things really gotten that bad since I left Arsenal?

Matteo🕺✨: YES

Bernd: YES

Willian: MALDITO SIU

Batman: You don’t know HALF of it

Emery: Pierre, Arsenal are literally above Chelsea in the Premier League table

Bernd: Emery, they’re above everybody in the Premier League table

Petr: Amen

Willian: Fulham is pretty good. At least I can get in the starting XI there

Matteo🕺✨: OUCH

Nuno: So how long will it take Tudor to offload Eric?

Matteo🕺✨: MUST WE BRING THAT UP?!

Matteo🕺✨: My dad taught karate but yeesh 😡 😳 did Eric have to do that?

Bernd: I’m surprised you didn’t put out an army of anger emojis

Matteo🕺✨: Bernd, Laca and Pierre are here

Matteo🕺✨: I’m on my best behavior

The Ox: THIS is your best behavior?!

Matteo🕺✨: You’re one to talk, Alex Oxlaide-Chamberlain

The Ox: My teammates do the crap, not me

Petr: I’m RIGHT HERE you know

The Ox: DAMNIT

The Ox: 😳

Matteo🕺✨: See? Best behavior

Sead: The Maupay incident was your best behavior?!

Matteo🕺✨: SEAD COME ON

Matteo🕺✨: The filthy animal wanted to assassinate Bernd

Bernd: Verdammte right 👍

Laca: Hell yeah

Batman: FIGHT HIM

Willian: I’LL GET THE BAZOOKAS

David: I’LL GET THE CANNONS

The Ox: I’LL GET KLOPP

Petr: We literally have nuclear weapons 🙄 😒

Petr: And Ox are you kidding me?

The Ox: You haven’t seen unhinged Klopp enough times yet

Petr: I saw him plenty of times, thank you

Willian: Is the battle still on?

Laca: Hell yes

Petr: DACA there are CHILDREN here

Batman: Like who?

Petr: Like Matteo and Nuno

Matteo🕺✨: I’ve been through an attack on Dimitri, a Nice game and a World Cup and I’m still a kid?

Laca: You’re our kid

Matteo🕺✨: Glad to see somebody has my back 💙

Emery: I have your back too

Emery: Just come to Aston Villa

Matteo🕺✨: And reunite with Emi? Diablo no

Nuno: I thought you liked him back at Arsenal

Matteo🕺✨: Have you had your eyes closed during the past month?!

Batman: He took his Golden Glove trophy and—

Laca: PIERRE THERE ARE MINORS HERE

Willian: AND THERE ARE ALSO PEOPLE WHO WOULD LIKE TO PRESERVE THEIR DIGNITY

David: 👍

Sead: NO

The ALex: JUST NO

Petr: You’re shaming all the goalkeepers in the world!!!!

The Ox: The goalies wouldn’t come outside wearing their gloves for days

Laca: The boss won’t like this, Pierre

The Ox: Neither will mine

Matteo🕺✨: Even Tudor has standards

Nuno: You’re right

Laca: Even Mikel has standards

Matteo🕺✨: We don’t get along too much, but you’re right Laca

Matteo🕺✨: He won’t do what Emi did

Petr: Enough about that, everybody

The Ox: Face it Petr, once we bring it up we’re never going to stop talking about it

Petr: Unless I do something about it

(PETR has closed the chat and deleted the chatroom.)

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breathenbounce · 8 months

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REDESIGN REBUILD RECLAIM

This has been a rallying cry of mine since my huge fall from grace in 2016. A fall that I have been fighting to get back from and although obstacles get placed in my path, I am still here. Standing, fighting and most importantly, breathing.

The title of this piece comes from WWE superstar Seth Rollins. Seth was on a huge run, and was injured pretty badly. He needed to have surgery and was out of action for sometime. However when he came back, he released this mantra on his T-shirts and yes I own one. I have told myself this everyday since I had a psychotic break in 2016 where things began to unravel, but I fought hard and kept things together but lately, things have been harder.

I'm not going to get into the nuances of my issues. I am growing. I am getting stronger, but sometimes I fall and I fall hard. I don't say the right things and react very poorly to people and difficult situations. I have the tools provided to me, but I don't always use them. I read into some things too much. I feel too hard. Yes I have stuff. However my personal journey should not impact BNB. And yes it has. Boy it has.

We just got on spotify and another radio station has agreed to air the show. I dragged the beginning of that process with them, and I hope my latest actions will help. The last episode on Spotify was XI, and we are on XIX this week. I haven't written on this for at least a month and haven't produced new content on the site with my Monday Moments or anything else for that matter. I have been keeping up with the show on HCR on Fridays as it has been new shows every week. One show I dealt with my depression, which is what I am going to talk about here.

Depression is a mother fucker. It kills motivation, it crushes spirit, it makes you feel like you are unloved and unwanted. It's horrible. I have been feeling useless for the last two months. I have told people I am OK, but I'm not. I lie to make life easier for them. I don't want to be a burden but sometimes my emotions make it out, and I can't stop talking or doing things. Having BPD, ADHD, and a depressive disorder is a trifecta of terror, and I do my best to move forward. I'm not going to lie and tell you everything is OK. But I will tell you I am taking steps to manage it.

I do therapy once a week, DBT once a week, and now I have started seeing a psychiatrist to go down the rabbit hole of meds. It was meds that made me break in 2016, so I am being very cautious about this. It is my yoga practice that gives me strength along with a community of some super people, and the love I have for my children. I do not want to let them down.

So why am I telling you this? Well I need to really talk about it and get serious. I have feelings of doubt all the time. It's my biggest enemy of the five I have learned about during training. I doubt people like me. I doubt that I can touch people. I doubt I'm good for my family. However, I fight with doubt often, so I don't carry these feelings all the time. The bottom line is if I want BNB to be successful, I have to do a better job then what I am doing.

BNB is for everyone. I created it so people have a place to go to talk about the hard stuff, to work it out, to learn yoga and find awesome people who can help them as well. Many of the guests on the show have played pivotal roles in my life. I love them all dearly, and I am so thankful for the lessons they have taught me. Some on the mat, some off. So I wanted to be able to help people. That is why I am here and I will continue to do so.

So this is me making my promise. I redesigned my blueprint. I am rebuilding my brand, and I will reclaim the role that I believe I am born for. To make the world a better place with my voice, my movement, my energy, and my willingness to learn how to be better everyday. This will be my focus. This is my aim.

I will update this column on Wednesdays as I was supposed to. Join me for Monday Mindful Minute tomorrow live on facebook and possibly you tube.

Peace and love.

Namaste

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zintranslations · 3 years

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Kaleidoscope of Death, Ch. 120

Kaleidoscope of Death by Xi Zixu Link to Chinese / Novel Updates

Chapter 120: The Thirteenth Door

Right after the new year, it came about time for Gu Longming to enter his door.

Ruan Nanzhu selected a sixth door hint slip, and on it was a name familiar to all—Minotaur. A monster from ancient Greek mythology with a bull's head and a human's body that guarded a maze.

In the myth, it was a creature of an extremely violent temperament born of a human and a white bull. Shut away in the Labyrinth on the island of Crete, it ate seven pairs of boys and girls each year. Then it was killed by a bastard son of Athens, Theseus. Point was, there wasn't much intel to gain about the door from a hint like this. Only once they went in and encountered the actual situation could they connect it to the hint on the paper slip.

Lin Qiushi also showed this hint to Gu Longming ahead of time. After Gu Longming received it, he expressed his thorough gratitude for Lin Qiushi, and Lin Qiushi too was forthright with a vaccination—he said that in this door, he could not be responsible for Gu Longming's life, and Gu Longming ought to prepare himself accordingly.

Gu Longming agreed to every stipulation, and said he had already prepared himself for never coming out.

Their time of entry was roughly the tenth of the lunar new year, when celebrations were trailing off, leisurely vacations were coming to an end, and everybody grew busy again.

Lin Qiushi readied everything and began to wait for the door.

The tenth quickly came. It was a bright, sunny afternoon, and few people were in the mansion. There was only Lin Qiushi sitting in the living room eating Lu Yanxue's freshly cooked pumpkin seeds. Lu Yanxue's culinary skills were, as usual, the best; the pumpkin seeds she fried up were flavored with the five spices and fragrant as all hell. Lin Qiushi could pass an entire afternoon with just a handful of the stuff.

Ruan Nanzhu had already gotten changed and was waiting upstairs. Lin Qiushi saw that it was about time, and so hoisted his hefty backpack and headed upstairs to go look for him.

Due to their last door, Lin Qiushi intentionally stuffed his bag with a great number of food items. Daily necessities from outside could be brought inside, but weapons that were more against the spirit of the doors were not. Guns and other firearms, for example, could not be brought inside.

Once you'd entered the doors, of course, there might exist some special limitations, like in the sanitarium door when the NPC told them the rule where they could not eat food brought in from the outside. The reality was that these kinds of limitations were rare, but all Lin Qiushi wanted to achieve was the principle of Better Safe Than Sorry. At any rate, the condition from the tenth door where they had to open a chest if they wanted to eat had left quite the shadow on his psyche.

Lin Qiushi entered Ruan Nanzhu's bedroom and sat with him on the bed for a while. Then he felt the atmosphere around him change. It took only the time of a blink for Ruan Nanzhu, who had been sitting right beside him, to disappear without a trace. Lin Qiushi pushed open the bedroom door in front of him and saw that what had originally been the hallway was now a series of twelve black metal doors. What a familiar sight.

He walked to the sixth door and gave it a tug. The next moment, Lin Qiushi was sucked in by an immense force. The scenery around him was also altering dramatically, and by the time he opened his eyes again, he could feel a faint rocking beneath his feet.

Lin Qiushi took a closer look, and discovered that he'd appeared on a large old ship. It was just about sunset, and there were black clouds frighteningly low in the sky, as if they were going to smother the horizon at any moment. Inky seawater tossed before him, blown into violent waves by the winds.

Lin Qiushi smelled the gamy salt of the ocean, and because of the excessive waves, the ancient deck beneath his feet was ceaseless in its swaying. He saw that on the floorboards, there were seaweed-clung creatures clutching at the wood, making for an immensely uncomfortable sight.

Lin Qiushi took a few steps forward and saw in the ship cabin a dim-glowing light. He followed the corridor to the interior, and heard miserable wailing coming from inside.

"Uwaaaa, why am I here? What the hell did you all do to me?!" It had been a while since he last heard these cries of a newbie—Lin Qiushi was actually a bit surprised. He spotted the crying person immediately. It was a young woman, wiping at her tears with her hands. "You goddamn perverts, you guys must have kidnapped me. I'm going to call the cops and have you all arrested!!"

Most people were listening to her sob in silence. Newbies, after all, only ever reacted in so many ways: most cried; some tried to run; and some, of the truly psychologically frail sort, came in and pretty much had an immediate meltdown.

Lin Qiushi stood where he was. He noticed that around this girl were a few people who didn't look so good, who also seemed in various degrees of panic. They clearly weren't prepared to enter a door, and were likely newbies like the girl. But at least they weren't wailing endlessly like the young woman, and were still calm in comparison.

Lin Qiushi's gaze searched through the crowd and very quickly found its target—a woman seated in a corner and smiling at him.

The woman wore a long dress—the same outfit Ruan Nanzhu wore before they came in.

Lin Qiushi had the script in his head, and he took his time approaching the woman and holding out his hand: "Yu Linlin."

"Zhu Meng." The woman took his hand and smiled. "The red thread of destiny found us inside this door, let's cherish this meeting."

Lin Qiushi couldn't help but laugh.

"Indeed. Let's cherish this meeting."

Really, this little drama queen of his—putting on a show even when there was no stage to be had.

Just as the two were talking, a young man came tumbling in through the door. Though his face was unfamiliar, his clothes told Lin Qiushi his identity—it was Gu Longming, who'd agreed to meet with Lin Qiushi over the internet.

Gu Longming was entirely soaked. Once he came in he began to curse under his breath: "fuckers, throwing me on a lifeboat—why don't you just throw me into the ocean huh? Goddamn jealous of my beauty or what—"

Though he kept his voice down, Lin Qiushi's hearing was superb, and so could easily hear all the crap he was spewing. For a moment, Lin Qiushi himself didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

Of course, he didn't laugh. He only cleared his throat once and covered his mouth with his hand, swallowing down the urge to smile. Gu Longming's eyes lapped the gathered people and very quickly fell upon Lin Qiushi and Ruan Nanzhu. He came over with a bright grin, greeting the two as if they'd just met completely by coincidence.

As a matter of act, this little trick where they faked a chance encounter was only useful for the earlier doors. Once in the later doors, that old fox-spirit manifested in everyone, and not having a partner actually made you the odd one out.

As for whether or not somebody would identify them as part of the same crew, Lin Qiushi used to worry about that. Now though, not so much.

The cabin of the old ship wasn't big, nor was it bright. The only lighting equipment was a handful of tiny kerosene lamps overhead, flickering periodically with the sway of the ship.

The sky grew darker outside, and the number of people kept increasing. Finally, it stopped at the count of fourteen.

Everybody assessed their surroundings as they met up with their own teammates. The crowd seemed to be very quickly divided up into teams, with the handful of newbies left out. Without much choice, they had to make up their own team.

Just as the crowd grew noisy with discussion, a middle-aged man came in from the outside. His get-up looked a bit like a medieval pirate, and he carried a swaying kerosene lamp in his hand.

"Welcome to the Black Skerry," the man spoke. His voice sounded quite raspy, like the effects of long-term drinking or smoking had brought about irreversible damage to his throat. "I hope you all have a good time here."

After he finished saying this, he laughed like a maniac, and his high-pitched laughter, like fingernails scoring a chalkboard, sent goosebumps rising along the skin.

"In ten days, the Black Skerry will reach harbor," the man said. "Our voyage will end then, so please enjoy our wonderful time together."

Just as he finished speaking, somebody rushed out of the cabin. Lin Qiushi first thought that this person had gotten scared, but not long after, there came from outside the sound of violent vomiting—it seemed that some unlucky bastard was seasick.

"Where in the world are we?" The sobbing young girl had also been scared by the man before her, and she spoke: "are we filming a show? I'm really, really scared, can I please quit? I don't want to play anymore, I'm begging you…"

The man completely ignored her. He merely went on watching the crowd with a cool gaze.

The girl seemed to want to go up and take hold of him, but when she got to his side she suddenly stopped, face draining of all color. She then backed up a few steps, as if she'd seen something truly terrifying.

Lin Qiushi's eyesight wasn't as good as Ruan Nanzhu's, and due to the dim lights he didn't see a thing. It was Ruan Nanzhu who quietly explained the situation to him:

"That person's covered in some sort of black insect."

Gu Longming shivered.

"Is he dead or alive then?"

"I don't know," Ruan Nanzhu said. "Doesn't look too good either way."

Under typical circumstances, only the NPC who provided them with the key information was somewhat normal. If even that NPC wasn't normal, then there really weren't any normal people to speak of.

Lin Qiushi hadn't imagined that their door this time would be an ancient ship. And by the looks of things, the time limit was ten days.

"Come along, I'll take to to where you'll sleep," the man said. "It'll be dark soon…and it'll rain."

After this, he began that manic laugh again, and the group was even more disturbed.

The man brought them to the guest cabins and began divvying up the rooms.

Most of the rooms here were doubles, with a rare triple here and there. At first, Lin Qiushi was assigned a double, but Gu Longming brazenly went and found a man to switch room numbers with, strong-arming them into a triple.

"You'll bargain for even this sort of thing?" Lin Qiushi shot Gu Longming a look of admiration.

"Well I'm scared of dying, aren't I…" Gu Longming said. He didn't want to sleep alone, and though it wasn't quite right to be a third wheel, being a third wheel was much better than being dead.

Ruan Nanzhu’s smile was inscrutable.

"That's fair."

They'd planned to inspect the entire ship, but because the night was already so dark, moving about outside would be too dangerous. They would rest first, and wait until tomorrow to make plans.

And so the three got their key and went to their room, getting into bed after quickly washing up.

When Ruan Nanzhu went to change, Gu Longming took the opportunity to poke at Lin Qiushi, whispering, "yo, not cool man, how come you didn't tell me you had such a pretty girlfriend?"

Lin Qiushi answered a vague: "…mh."

"Oh she's stunning," Gu Longming said with a sigh. "If I had a girlfriend like that I'd want to stick around her every day too."

As he spoke, he looked to Lin Qiushi with an expression that was both envy and admiration.

Lin Qiushi watched him back and wondered how he would react if he knew Ruan Nanzhu was drag queen. Of course, it wasn't something he could tell Gu Longming now. Gu Longming was not yet part of Obsidian, and the fact that Ruan Nanzhu wore drag was Obsidian's biggest most vital secret…

After Ruan Nanzhu got changed, he came back inside.

"What are you two talking about?"

"Nothing," Lin Qiushi answered in brief. "He said you were pretty."

Ruan Nanzhu replied with a meaningful oh.

Gu Longming: "…" Why did a chill suddenly go down his back?

The beds on the ship all emanated a damp smell—very uncomfortable for the people lying on top. At this point, the waves and wind were getting bigger, and even the sleeping quarters were beginning to rock. Lin Qiushi remembered that ridiculously seasick, endlessly vomiting pal of theirs from earlier and thought that that guy was pretty much done for.

The sky outside gradually darkened in entirety, leaving only the bellowing winds and the sound of waves beating against each other. With his eyes shut, Lin Qiushi grew drowsy—but before he could fall asleep, he was woken by a sudden crack of thunder. It was like lightning had struck right above their heads. With the loud boom, all three of them awoke in an instant.

After that, it was the pattering pour of rain. The rushing rain and the howling wind—they seemed on the verge of destroying everything.

Their quarters rocked even harder. Lin Qiushi sat up in his bed.

Through the window, he looked to the black evening outside. He saw, however, two illuminated lights. It seemed like the only light sources on deck were kerosene lamps, but how did these lamps stay so bright in the middle of a thunderstorm…? Just as Lin Qiushi wondered this, he suddenly felt that there was something off about those two lights, and Ruan Nanzhu, sitting behind him, spoke up quietly:

"Don't look anymore."

Lin Qiushi, "hm?"

"Those aren't lights," Ruan Nanzhu said. "Those are eyes."

A pair of yellow, inhuman eyes. The owner of the eyes spied through the darkness with malicious intent, as if a beast looking for its prey.

Lin Qiushi instantly looked away, and asked, "what is that thing?"

"I don't know, I can't tell," Ruan Nanzhu said. "The shape is humanoid, but it doesn't seem to be human."

Lin Qiushi's brows lightly furrowed, but by the time he looked out the window once more, the eyes were gone.

Thunder rumbled on and on, and that stench of ocean salt grew thicker and more cloying.

Ruan Nanzhu climbed into Lin Qiushi's bed, and holding each other, the two very quickly returned to sleep. However, the only bachelor present Gu Longming didn't have such luck. Lying beside Lin Qiushi, he stared with plaintive eyes, thinking that in the following days, he'd be fed enough dog food to bloat.

The rainstorm lasted until dawn, and though the rain let up, the weather did not turn any sunnier. Black storm clouds still hovered over the ship, and when the alarm rang, Lin Qiushi actually thought it was not yet morning. He checked the time, however, and saw that it was 8AM. It was just still dark outside.

"Good morning," Ruan Nanzhu greeted Lin Qiushi.

"Good morning. It's so dark outside today."

"It's probably going to keep raining," Ruan Nanzhu said. He walked out onto deck with Lin Qiushi and watched the black waters roil underneath the ship.

Looking up, they couldn't see any land, only the endless swath of sea. Only the old ship beneath their feet felt like any sort of reality.

This sort of isolating environment was easily taxing on the psyche. Even for Lin Qiushi, the scene before them was discomforting.

"Come on, let's go get breakfast," Gu Longming called to the two.

"He's pretty thick-skinned," Ruan Nanzhu commented after hearing Gu Longming's call.

"Yeah," Lin Qiushi said. "His nerves are petty good."

Inside the doors, you didn't have to be too smart, but you definitely had to be brave enough. Before terrifying situations, fright could make a person abandon a large part of their cognitive abilities. The smartest person could lack a strong heart and still do worse inside the door than the obtuse, oblivious Cheng Qianli.

The three went to the dining area and found there an atmosphere that could very well be called lifeless.

Lin Qiushi didn't know why at first. After he saw the menu, however, he couldn't help but also feel a touch of depression.

All the ship offered was fish. And it wasn't even fresh fish—Gu Longming poked at a dead-eyed staring head with his chopsticks and said, "is this thing even edible?"

It was disgusting just to look at.

"It looks gross," Lin Qiushi said. "Try a bit?"

Gu Longming took a bit of meat from the gills and gave it a taste. His expression twisted.

"Fuck, did they deduct the food budget for this door or what? It's disgusting. It's like they’ve had it outside for three days. You try it?"

Lin Qiushi, "oh no, no thank you."

Gu Longming: "…"

The breakfast served in the dining room was, for the most part, stale fish. Aside from that there was only flavorless noddles and peas. The environment had already been vicious enough, but the food in front of them now was salt on top of the wound.

But Lin Qiushi and Ruan Nanzhu didn't care at all. After seeing the inedible breakfast they snuck back to their room and fetched from their bags the food they'd prepared.

Gu Longming watched as they pulled out a bottle of chili sauce, eyes bulging out.

"You guys even brought Lao Gan Ma? Did you come here to picnic?"

"Want some?" Lin Qiushi drizzled the Lao Gan Ma over some noodles they'd brought out of the dining hall.

"Yeah yeah yeah. More please." Gu Longming's expression was shameless.

With breakfast finally done, they got ready to search the ship.

There were a total of three decks in the ship, constructed a bit like the sailing vessels of the great nautical era of the Middle Ages. It was extremely old, was all, covered in the marks and traces of times past.

Beside that NPC, they didn't see any other crew members on deck; there was likely only the one NPC on the entire ship. Wait for the ship's return was the mission the NPC left for them this time, but Lin Qiushi had thorough reason to believe that if they couldn't find the door in ten day's time, this voyage of theirs would cycle back and repeat—and they'd experience the ten days all over again.

When Lin Qiushi climbed onto the second deck, he heard a sort of thumping sound, and was uncertain if Ruan Nanzhu and Gu Longming had heard it as well. So he asked, "did you guys hear that?"

"What?" Gu Longming didn't seem to have heard.

Ruan Nanzhu said, "I think I did, but not very clearly."

"I think it came from the corner…" Lin Qiushi followed the sound forward. "Let's go see."

But before they could get close, Lin Qiushi was hit with a thick, fishy stench. It was disgusting and nauseating to smell; fortunately Cheng Yixie wasn't here, or he might have passed out immediately upon smelling it.

The source of the sound and smell was the same room, and they were close enough now that both Gu Longming and Ruan Nanzhu could hear the thumping noise as well.

The three of them slowed their steps, and through the window, looked into the room.

It was a kitchen with knives and other tools hanging inside. The most eye-catching thing, however, was the dense masses of dead fish hung up on hooks all over the sides.

A person in an apron stood in the center of the room with their back towards them and head down. They were chopping something. After some observation, Gu Longming almost gagged, and said, "don't tell me he's making our breakfast—"

Ruan Nanzhu was very calm.

"It's possible."

Gu Longming did gag. He'd even had a bite of that fish that morning.

Lin Qiushi gave Gu Longming a sympathetic pat on the shoulder.

This person in the kitchen, however, was the second living NPC they'd found on the ship.

The three of them stood watching in the kitchen doorway for a while, and saw that besides chopping fish, this person didn't do much of anything else. And so they decided to go see elsewhere first.

Very soon, they discovered a more peculiar room. This room was locked, and curtains were drawn over the window. It was quiet inside, but they could still smell that thick waft of stale fish. Lin Qiushi initially thought the smell had clung to them from the kitchen, but after a careful sniff, found that it was coming from inside the room.

"Do we go in?" Gu Longming was pressed against the window trying to look in, but he could see nothing.

Ruan Nanzhu gave this some thought, before saying, "let's try," and getting out a hairpin to pick the lock.

Watching his adept motions, Gu Longming's eyes widened. Then Gu Longming glanced at Lin Qiushi.

"Is this…is this a basic skillset that y'all come with?"

Lin Qiushi grinned as he joked, "yeah. You have to learn to pick locks if you want to join us."

As he said this, there was a click. Ruan Nanzhu really got the lock open. But oddly enough, after he unlocked the door and gave it a push, he found that though the door lock was undone, there was another lock hanging on the inside. The chain on that lock held the door closed, and they could at most manage a crack—it couldn't be opened at all.

"Wait," Lin Qiushi suddenly said, stopping Ruan Nanzhu from going up and pushing the door. "Stop for a second. There's movement inside."

Ruan Nanzhu halted, and just as he stopped mid-step, a hand, sharp-nailed and covered in scales, reached out of the door. And through that crack in the door, a pair of yellow eyes looked out, peering at the world outside with malicious intent.

Translator’s Note:

The name of the ship could more simply be translated as “Black Reef,” but “Black Skerry” sounds more like a ship name? Let me know if you think otherwise (or know if it’s a specific reference to something).

Lao Gan Ma is a brand of **hot sauce (edited: 7/26), as you can probably tell from context. The original next never uses “hot sauce” though, and just call it Lao Gan Ma in both the prose and the dialogue.

[Ch. 119] | [Ch. 121]

#kaleidoscope of death #xi zixu #cnovel #chinese translation #死亡萬花筒 #NEW ARC #i like ships where the people take on characteristics they like about each other #and this is the peak 'rnz is a horrible influence on lqs' arc #but also rnz is a great influence on lqs #honeymoon door baby

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hamliet · 2 years

Note

You said you wanted more CFC asks and I am dying for your take on it - what do you think the arc for XQC will be from now on? I don’t mean solving the murders of his parents, being official couple with He Yu, not dying but in terms of emotional development - will he get to balance his depersonalizing views of himself or his devotion to control or even that his meaning is only if others need him?

And if so, what could give him this push? I mean, he realizes he loves HY by now and also knows both how devoted HY is and how ill and still thinks it’s best to break up and continue to slowly killing himself. (Yes, he’s dying but while his issues are triggered by that, they existed before and he could try to stop dying and get treatment but he won’t.)

I don’t know, I think he’s the most messed up of Meatbun’s mains and I am so interested in your take on it.

SCREAMS a CFC ASK!!!!

I agree he's the most messed up of Meatbun's mains, which is actually why I think He Yu and Xie Qingcheng are, to me, the most compelling of her main characters (which is saying a lot because I adore Ranwan and Ximang!)

I'll actually compare each pairing a little bit, because I think each of Meatbun's main pairings are deliberately crafted to explore unique takes on identity:

Gu Mang has a good sense of self (ironically, considering half the time he doesn't know who he is);

Mo Xi has a good sense of self as well, even if his understanding of himself is often founded on incorrect information and therefore wrong;

Mo Ran understands himself but wants to be someone else (hence playing at being Mo Nian for so many years)

Chu Wanning understands himself and wants to be someone else (a human).

So you can see how each pairing has issues related to self-understanding and actualization designed to compliment and challenge each other.

Unlike Gu Mang and Mo Xi, Xie Qingcheng and He Yu both have extremely poor senses of themselves. Unlike Mo Ran or Chu Wanning, neither of them really wants to be someone or something else--He Yu never really wishes he was not ill, for example. They are who they are; they just don't know who that is, or what that means, or for how long they'll be themselves.

Neither of them can trust themselves, because their self--everything that makes them who they are mentally and physically and emotionally--is subject to the mercy of a terminal illness that can take anything from them. There's always a risk they'll lose who they are. Trying to find who they are as people is walking a balance beam slicked with butter: they might make it (clearly I think they will at the end, but for the time being, as they understand it, they may or may not make it), or they might plummet into a world where they aren't even aware of the most basic existence.

For Xie Qingcheng, I think that deriving meaning through others needing him is not something that will entirely be undone--because I don't think it's an inherently unhealthy trait! I think it's unhealthy in how he applies it--I think he needs to see that he has worth and that others need him because he's Xie Qingcheng. None of the people who truly love him would give up on him even if he could no longer do what he has always done for them (even though many have--see, his colleagues at the hospital). Those who love him need him for no other reason than that he exists, and they love his existence. I do think his bridge towards accepting this comes through accepting being needed and appreciated by others, rather than through constantly trying to earn his right to exist--which is precisely what he's doing.

He doesn't think he should exist at all. He Yu thinks much the same, even if neither of them are acknowledging it. That's why he's killing himself. It's an apology to the world that he exists at all.

For Xie Qingcheng, I'd actually go so far as to say it's a very realistic psychological reaction to his parents' deaths. Kids who go through trauma like losing a parent often stay "stuck" in that stage of their life in some aspects, unable to mature and move on, because they somehow subconsciously think they'll be able to change it (this ties into Xie Qingcheng's need for control, too--it's very egocentric of him, and by that I don't mean ego in a negative sense, but in the psychological sense wherein egocentric is how children are described: their worlds are oriented around themselves, and they think everything that happens is because of them).

For He Yu, there's the fact that his family has basically thrown him away, providing for him physically but never really emotionally. Plus, his mother presumably sacrificed herself to save him (or agreed to have an experiment conducted on her, who knows her real motives).

So, what can give Xie Qingcheng the push towards believing he deserves to exist?

He Yu.

In all seriousness, I think the mystery of his parents' deaths and the link to He Yu's existence is going to be key. I myself don't know how it'll go, and I'm generally bad at predicting plot specifics (much better with general themes), but I think there are a couple ways that this might play out.

Firstly, He Yu will probably regret his entire existence if he finds out he exists because Xie Qingcheng's parents died. I mean, he already doesn't really care to exist, but he's probably going to bluntly state it (between messy sobs because it's He Yu) when this comes out. I do not think Xie Qingcheng will be able to handle seeing He Yu giving voice to the very same feelings and deeply-held toxic beliefs Xie Qingcheng himself holds for himself.

I also think Xie Qingcheng's parents might well have died in part to save Xie Qingcheng... I have no idea how or what those factors might have been, but considering the sacrificial themes in the story, I do think it's possible and might well fit thematically. If his parents died to enable both him to live, because they were just glad Xie Qingcheng existed and wanted him to continue to exist, and (whether intentionally or not) also died to enable He Yu's existence, well. That might also have an impact.

Or maybe Meatbun will just go mpreg and give him a baby because at this point who knows P

#ask hamliet #cfc meta #bab meta #bing an ben #case file compendium meta #case file compendium #hexie #he yu #xie qingcheng #meatbun doesn't eat meat #meatbun meta

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css1992 · 3 years

Text

Guilty Pleasure

[Porn AU]

Summary: Peter and Beck used to be a power couple in the porn industry, but after Beck dumps him, Peter is forced to start over. With no money, no family and nowhere to go, he doesn’t have much choice other than to keep doing porn, so he joins Just4Fans to get back on his feet and then one day he gets a very generous tip from someone under the username of YKWIM.

All the warnings listed on Part I apply.

Read on AO3

Part I / Part II / Part III / Part IV / Part V / Part VI / Part VII / Part VIII / Part IX / Part X / Part XI / Epilogue

-x-

Peter was unreasonably nervous on the way to Tony’s house – he felt like a teenage virgin, even though he was far from that. The problem was he knew the older man probably had certain expectations for what was about to happen, it was impossible for him not to have, of course. He watched all of his videos, he followed his Just4Fans, he had seen his wildest, sexiest, naughtiest side, but the thing was, that didn’t really come natural to Peter.

What most people didn’t seem to realize was that porn sex was very different from real life sex. Most of the things that looked good didn’t necessarily feel good, because porn wasn’t about getting off, it was about getting the viewers off, at the cost of the actors’ own pleasure sometimes. In Peter’s experience, most of the times.

Tony was older, experienced, Peter supposed he knew all of that, but he also met him through porn, he had seen him have sex with several people several times, so who knew, maybe he thought Peter actually liked being choked half to death or slapped black and blue. Maybe he thought he liked it rough, no prep and no lube, and maybe he wouldn’t understand that if he cried and begged him to stop, he wasn’t trying to be kinky, he just–

“Hey.” Peter jumped up in surprise when he heard the man’s voice to his left. Tony had both of his hands on the steering wheel, but his eyes were focused on him. There was a small frown between his brows and the younger man wondered if he had missed something. “I can still drive you home if you changed your mind, ok?”

“What?” Peter asked, a little too loudly, and the older man gave him a small smile.

“You just seem a little freaked out,” he clarified, and the boy blushed, dipping his chin down to stare at his lap. “There’s no pressure here, Peter. If I somehow made you feel like you have to do this, please –“

“Gods, no!” He cut him off, because that was the furthest thing from the truth, not even once did Tony make him feel like he had to do anything. “I’m sorry, it’s just – been a while since–” he started, but then he felt dumb, because he used to do that for a living and Tony knew it. “I mean, without cameras and stuff.” He mumbled, feeling his face burning in shame at the confession.

He was surprised when the older man’s hand came into view, grabbing one of his gently. Peter raised his eyes to look at him.

“Tell you what,” Tony started with that charming smile of his, squeezing his hand a little. “We’ll just have a few drinks and see where it goes. I’ll drive you home at any time you ask, just say the word.”

Peter sighed, feeling weirdly relieved by those words. It wasn’t like he didn’t know that, but it was still nice to hear. He could quit at any time. He was still in control of his body. He got to decide whatever happened next.

“Sounds nice,” he said, and Tony must have heard the honesty in his voice because his expression softened and the corners of his lips tilted up.

A few minutes later, Stark Tower popped into view as they turned a corner and the younger man noticed they were headed there, which confused him at first, but Tony explained he lived on the top floor of the tower. Peter was surprised to hear that, he always assumed he lived in some fancy building in Manhattan, but when he thought about it, it made sense. Tony living anywhere else could be a threat to his neighbors’ lives, what with his side job and all.

“I used to live in Malibu.” Peter remembered that. He also remembered his mansion was destroyed in a terrorist attack back in 2010, after Tony basically gave the Mandarin his home address. “When I moved here, I decided to turn the top few floors of Stark Tower into my home. It was all for me at first, but later it became the Avengers headquarters. A few of them lived there for a while, like Steve, before we… You know.” Peter didn’t know, actually. He remembered Captain America and a few others became fugitives at some point, but he didn’t really know the story behind it. To be fair, he didn’t think the public at large knew the whole truth either. “Now it’s just me again.”

Peter didn’t comment on the fact that he skipped the part where he probably lived there with Pepper Potts. The boy didn’t lie when he said he didn’t know a lot about the older man’s life, but some things were hard to miss, like his marriage to the most powerful woman in the world. Peter remembered it was literally all over the news, meaning the divorce, just a little over a year earlier, was just as covered by the media as well.

He decided not to ask, though.

When they arrived at the tower, Tony got out of the car and went around it to open the door for him. He blushed at the small act of chivalry, but the older man didn’t even seem to realize it. He once again placed a hand on the small of his back as he led him to a metal door that slid open with a quiet hiss after both of their faces were scanned.

Tony nudged him inside what looked like an elevator; there were no buttons or anything, but it started moving up as soon as the doors closed behind them. The ride up to the top floor was filled with “fun facts” about the tower, for which Peter was grateful, he could tell the man was trying to put him at ease and he appreciated it.

When the elevator dinged and the doors slid open to reveal a fancy living room, though, he couldn’t help the nervous sigh that left his lips.

“Okay, I know I promised drinks, but I think we had enough at the restaurant, right?” Tony’s warm hand never left his back, and it had a soothing effect on him. Peter nodded, because they did share two bottles of wine during the meal, plus half a bottle of champagne for desert. He wasn’t wasted, but he was definitely not one hundred percent sober either, so maybe it was best to to keep it that way. “How about some coffee, then?”

“Sure, sounds good.” He smiled politely, as the older man led him into the living room.

It was huge, Peter was positive it could fit his whole apartment and there would still be a lot of room left over, but it was also very empty and minimalist. There was a couch and a few armchairs, they looked expensive, but not very comfortable. Other than that, there were paintings on the walls, a few decorative pieces, but nothing that stood to attention, except for the huge floor-to-ceiling glass wall, from which he could see almost all of New York City.

“Make yourself comfortable, I’ll be right back.” Tony gestured to the couch, but as he walked away in the direction Peter assumed was the kitchen, he headed to the window, watching the view.

He took a deep breath, trying to get his heartbeat somewhat under control. He wasn’t sure what was about to happen, what he wanted to happen, but most of all, he worried about the day after. About what would happen when he left the tower, when he left Tony behind. His brain told him that that whole night was a one time thing and that was it. But somewhere in his heart he hoped for… more.

He didn’t know what, though. He and Tony belonged to very different worlds, hoping for anything other than a one night stand seemed pointless.

“Here you go.” Tony walked back into the room, he had lost his jacket and tie, the top buttons of his shirt were open, exposing some of his chest, and his sleeves were rolled up to his elbows. Peter gulped, feeling a shiver run down his spine as he tried to focus on the coffee mugs in his hands, instead.

“Thanks.” He walked over to where the man was standing next to the couch, and accepted the drink, looking around the room, trying to find something that could distract him from his shaking hands. “Is that you?” He pointed at a barely visible black and white picture hanging on the wall of a hallway off to his right, leading away from the living room. Tony seemed surprised that Peter even noticed it, but he walked over there and waved for the younger man to follow.

“This is Dum-E, my first born, and this is me at sixteen,” Up close, Peter could see that it was a newspaper clipping and the headline read Tony Stark poses with the prize winning robot in his father’s workshop at Stark Industries. In the picture, he was crouching down next to a hydraulic arm robot, smiling proudly at the camera. Peter couldn’t help but notice that, of all the times he had probably made the newspapers, it seemed like that was the only one he chose to frame.

“You looked so cute,” he cooed, focusing on the kid in the picture. It wasn’t good quality, but he could tell Tony looked nerdy and maybe a little awkward. He wondered if he got picked on a lot in college. When he turned to look at the man’s face, he was smiling at him, amused. “What?”

“Nothing. I’m just glad you’re here.” Peter’s heart went so wild in his chest, he was worried the older man could hear it. “Thanks for agreeing to meet me, by the way, I’m sure it wasn’t an easy decision.” Tony placed his mug on the console table next to them.

“I hope it wasn’t too disappointing.” He chuckled nervously, leaning against the wall and holding his mug with both hands so the man wouldn’t notice how they were still shaking.

“Actually, it was way better than I imagined, kitten,” he assured him, moving to stand right in front of him, leaving Peter trapped between him and the wall.

“What did you imagine?” He took a sip of coffee, before placing his mug on the console table too, watching as Tony discreetly took a small step closer to him, so the tips of their shoes were almost touching.

“That you might turn out to be a kiss-ass who would try to impress me with a fake personality or something, but you can’t fake this.” He pinched his pink cheek, which made Peter blush even harder. “What did you imagine? About me, I mean.”

“It varied.” He said, to put it lightly. “But when we first started talking, I got almost everything right.” He bragged, because, to his credit, it was true.

“Yeah?” Tony’s eyes widened a little in surprise.

“Yeah.” Peter nodded, eyes roaming the man’s face, remembering all the things he fantasized about over the past few months. “Your hair, your eyes… Your voice.” His voice was small when he finished, as Tony closed the space between them by leaning in closer, one hand resting beside his head on the wall.

“My voice?” He lifted a brow and tilted his head to the side, blinking in curiosity.

“Mm-hmm.” He agreed nervously, eyes flickering between the man’s eyes and his mouth.

“Did you think about it a lot?” Tony was almost whispering then, his voice sounded smooth and low, and they were so close Peter could feel his coffee scented breath on his face.

“All the time.” He admitted, blinking slowly, hypnotized. Tony looked at him for a few seconds, eyes searching his face for something. When he seemed satisfied, he placed his other hand on Peter’s hip, gently, barely there, caging the younger man’s body completely in his arms.

“What did you think about?” Tony’s eyelids were so low he might as well have his eyes closed, but Peter knew he was staring at his mouth, which made him lick his lips. His heart was going wild in his rib cage, his breath growing irregular, talking became such a difficult task he didn’t think he could answer the question if he tried. “What did you want me to say to you?”

“Uhm… I just… Nice things.” He breathed out, eyes fluttering closed as he felt the man’s warm breath in his ear.

“Nice things.” He whispered, and then Peter could feel not only his hand on his hip, but his whole arm wrapping around his waist, pulling him closer. He gasped. “Like how good you are to me, hmm? Want me to tell you how beautiful you sounded when you said my name for the first time? How bad I’ve been wanting to touch you, since the first time I saw you?” Peter whimpered and lost all the strength in his knees, but Tony had a firm grip on him, holding him up. “Can I take care of you, sweetheart?”

“Yes.” As if the answer could be anything different from that when Tony’s arms were so warm around him and his breath warmed his neck and his smell enveloped him in a dream-like state. His eyes were already closed when Tony’s lips crashed into his and it was all Peter expected it to be.

Tony’s kiss was demanding, but gentle; anxious, but slow. His mouth moved against his like he had been waiting his whole life for that moment, his tongue sought passage through his lips and Peter obliged, meeting him halfway, and if there was any shred of doubt in his mind, it went right out the window at that second as Tony devoured him whole.

He felt his back slamming against a solid surface, even though he didn’t feel his feet moving. It took him a second to realize he wasn’t standing anymore, Tony had lifted him up and pushed him against the wall, catching him by surprise. He wrapped his legs around his waist, as he felt the man’s hands sliding from his hips down to his ass cheeks, where he squeezed tight.

His fingers got lost in the locks of Tony’s thick hair and a shock traveled down his spine when he felt the older man’s cock pressed against his, hips rocking torturously slow. Peter let out a surprised cry and Tony swallowed it eagerly, sinking his fingers into his flesh, they were so hot Peter could swear he could feel them through the fabric of his too expensive dress pants.

“Tony...” The name slipped out of his mouth without he even realizing it, the sound got trapped between their lips, like a shared secret.

“Shhh,” Tony shushed him when he whimpered, overwhelmed with all the feelings – the heat of their bodies glued together, the intensity of their incessant kissing, the feel of Tony’s hardness pressing against his, his hands roaming his body like they owned him – it was almost too much, Peter thought it might drive him insane. “Come on, let’s get you comfortable.”

The older man let him down gently, but held him firmly by the hips as he did, which was a good thing, since it took him a minute to find balance again. He gave him a lopsided grin, grabbed his hand and started pulling him down the hallway.

He followed the older man to what he assumed was his bedroom – it was just as big as the living room, probably, there was a huge bed in the center, and one of the walls was entirely made of glass, just like in the living room, but it slowly grew darker and darker until it was a solid gray color, hiding them from the world outside and vice-versa. The room was dark, then, and it took a minute for his eyes to adjust.

Tony let go of his hand and turned around to look at him, as he calmly undid a few more buttons of his shirt, eyes fixed on Peter’s face. He felt his cheeks burning again, which made the corners of the man’s mouth tilt up.

He sat down on the bed behind him and before the younger man could wonder what he was supposed to do next, he felt Tony’s hands on his hips, pulling him closer, until Peter was standing between his spread legs and the man’s face was almost pressed against his chest.

“We can stop right here,” he said, looking up at him, and Peter had a sudden urge to run his hands through his hair, so he didn’t hold back. Tony closed his eyes and sighed, turning his head a little to kiss one of his palms. “Did you hear me, honey?” He asked, firmly, looking into his eyes, and he nodded.

“I don’t wanna stop.” He whispered back, cupping the older man’s face, leaning down for a kiss.

Tony groaned into the kiss, satisfied with Peter’s initiative. He reached for the back of the boy’s legs and pulled them until he got the message and straddled him. They both moaned softly when their bodies found each other again. It was amazing to Peter how much easier it was for him to feel comfortable when they were so close, when Tony’s hands were burning his skin and his tongue was claiming his mouth in the most possessive way.

Again, he barely felt when Tony maneuvered him, he just felt an incredibly soft surface against his back and realized he was lying down with the older man between his legs. He felt dizzy, a little out of his mind, like he was in a dream. The room was dark and so very quiet, the only thing he could hear was the sloppy sounds of their lips locked together – and he had to admit he was growing addicted to it, to his taste, to the way his kisses left barely any room for breathing and still he would rather suffocate than ask him to stop.

He whimpered when he felt the older man pull away. He opened his eyes only to meet his heated gaze staring down at him for a moment, before he sat back on his heels and finished unbuttoning his shirt, slowly revealing more skin as he went. Peter noticed the scars on his chest and for some crazy reason he wanted to touch them, kiss them better, even though he knew they probably didn’t even hurt anymore. He bit his lower lip, trying to hold himself back.

“Enjoying the view?” His eyes snapped back up to Tony’s face and the man was smirking down at him, as he slid the shirt off his arms and threw it carelessly to the floor.

“Can you blame me? It’s quite a view.” Peter felt bold enough to say, watching the smile grown on older man’s face, as he leaned down again, his arms caging the boy’s head when he placed his elbows on each side of his face. He brushed his nose along Peter’s cheek, until he reached his ear, biting down on the lobe as he blew hot, moist air against his skin. The boy shivered, closing his eyes, hands flying up to grab Tony’s naked shoulders as if he was afraid he would sink into the mattress if he didn’t hold on to something.

“You think you can just say stuff like that and get away with it?” The words were mumbled into his neck as he bit down with hunger, one hand sliding down his torso, reaching for his belt. Tony started undoing it as he kept whispering in his ear, “You wanna hear nice things, but you keep trying to drive daddy mad, how is that fair?”

“Oh God,” Peter gasped, when he felt the man’s hand slide down the front of his pants, under his underwear, wrapping around his cock without any warning. He started massaging it slowly, almost lazily, as if he didn’t even realize he was doing it. “Daddy, please...”

“Now that’s a good boy. So polite.” His lips came crashing down onto Peter’s as his hand tightened around his cock, jerking it at a faster pace. The boy wrapped his arms around Tony’s neck, hands finding their way into his hair for the hundredth time that night – God, he loved his hair, so thick and soft in his fingers – and pulled him even closer to his face, deepening the kiss in an almost desperate way.

Peter kept trying to get Tony’s hand to move faster, thrusting his hips up every chance he got, but the older man ignored it completely, keeping his own, steady pace, as his mouth slid from Peter’s lips to his neck. The younger man threw his head back, exposing his throat, allowing Tony to have his way with him, there was nothing he wouldn’t give him right then and there, he was his.

“You smell fucking delicious, baby.” He inhaled deeply, nosing the exposed skin right above the collar of his shirt, then both of his hands started working on unbuttoning it and Peter whined at the loss of Tony’s touch on his cock. “It’s okay,” he whispered as he slid the shirt down his arms, throwing it to the side. “I’ll take good care of you, baby, I promise.” He leaned back down and kissed along Peter’s collarbones, before sucking one of his nipples into his mouth.

Peter was so fucking hard, just hearing those words almost sent him over the edge, it was ridiculous. It didn’t help that the older man’s tongue was abusing his nipple until it was hard and oversensitive, before he attacked the other one.

He slid his hands from the man’s shoulders, down his sides, reaching for his belt, but before he could do anything about it, Tony grabbed both of his wrists in one hand, catching him off guard, and held them above his head. Before Peter could say anything, his mind was distracted by those delicious lips assaulting his again, and the pressure of the older man’s hands around his wrists and his solid weight on top of him was enough to tame him into submission.

“Don’t move,” he demanded in a whisper, giving Peter one last peck on the lips before getting off of him. He bit his lower lip, trying to contain any sound of disappointment he might make, and shut his his eyes tightly. He kept his hands where Tony left them, above his head, like he could still feel the man’s fingers around them.

In seconds, Tony was back, Peter felt him positioning himself between his legs again, but didn’t open his eyes. He felt the older man’s hands on his hips, grabbing the waistband of his pants, slowly sliding to bring them down along with his underwear, leaving Peter naked and completely at his mercy. The feeling was inebriating.

When he didn’t do anything else for several seconds, the boy opened his eyes, breath hitching when he saw Tony in all his naked glory, kneeling between his legs, holding the base of his rock hard cock as he looked down at him with hunger in his eyes.

Before Peter could say or do anything, Tony leaned down and, without any warning, enveloped his cock in the wet warmth of his mouth, swallowing him down in one single motion. Peter cried out in pleasure, head spinning, eyes watering, legs spreading wider to give the older man more room to do whatever he wanted to him.

He bit the back of his hand when the man started sucking him, head bobbing up and down in a steady, slow pace, before drawing back with a pop, only for his lips and tongue to circle the tip of his cock, swallowing it down again right after, until Peter could feel the back of his throat. He couldn’t avoid the moan that slipped from his lips, as one of his hands flew to bury into Tony’s hair, but he didn’t dare to apply any pressure, he just pulled a little on the soft strands, trying to get himself under control.

When Tony set a quick pace with his mouth, Peter started pushing his hips just a tiny bit, keeping up with him, skin burning, hands gripping the sheets as if it could hold him back. He felt something cold and wet trying to make its way between his ass cheeks, making his eyes fly open, widening a little. He panted, knees falling further apart, allowing the older man better access. He felt one finger pushing in, calmly, gently, as the man kept sucking him off just as enthusiastically, Peter barely felt the burn on his lower back when the finger was completely sheathed inside him.

He was overwhelmed by the double stimulation, but he’d be damned if he was going to ask Tony to stop or slow down. He rocked his hips at Tony’s pace, obediently following the rise and fall of his head, thrusting up into his mouth and then down against his finger, taking anything and everything he could get.

He was already going insane when Tony held his hips down, as he slowly introduced another finger along with the first, the burning sensation taking the edge off a little, to Peter’s relief. He stayed still for a few seconds, feeling Tony scissoring his fingers, trying to open him up as best as he could, until both of them were buried deep inside him, pressing all the right places, pushing all his buttons at once, and he knew he couldn’t take that for much longer.

“Daddy, please, please... Please...” He pulled Tony’s hair until he reluctantly lifted his head, letting his cock go with a pop, eyes meeting Peter’s head on, dark as midnight.

“Please what, baby boy?” He asked, still fucking his fingers in and out of his hole, pain and pleasure mixing and making it impossible for him to rationalize anything.

“Please fuck me,” he begged, watching a slow smile appear on the older man’s face.

Tony climbed on top of him and attacked his lips, to Peter’s delight, who wrapped his arms and legs around his larger body, pulling him closer, their heated skins flush together, the boy could feel every inch of him enveloped by Tony’s warmth, his scent, all of him.

When Tony pulled away, Peter quickly moved to turn his back to him and lay on his stomach, not sure if he would want him like that or on all fours, so he pushed his hips up, giving him the option to put him on his knees if he wanted to. It took Tony a few seconds to lay his weight on him again, his chest glued to his back in a delicious friction, hips aligned, his hard cock pressed against his ass, as he mouthed at his neck, sucking and biting.

“Will you turn around for me, baby?” He whispered in his ear, nudging him on the side. Peter blinked a few times, trying to look at him from over his shoulder, but the angle didn’t allow it. “I wanna see you.”

His breath hitched and he froze for a second, feeling both of Tony’s hands sliding down his sides. He put some space between them and nudged Peter again, but didn’t force him to turn, he let him choose. The younger man obeyed, after a few seconds of stunned silence. Tony rested his weight against him again, holding his gaze.

“Is this okay?” He whispered against his lips, waiting long enough for Peter to breathe out an almost soundless yes before devouring him. He closed his eyes and let himself go, gave himself over the other man, without a hint of fear, untroubled by the consequences of the day after.

He felt Tony’s hands, strong and rough, grabbing both of his thighs, lifting one of them to place his ankle on his shoulder, spreading him wide open. He felt the wet tip of his cock brushing against his hole, making it quiver in anticipation. Peter only had enough time to take a breath before feeling the older man start to press into him, but his moan was swallowed by Tony, who kissed him deeply as he forced his way into him, slowly and unrelenting, the burn was painful but so fucking good.

“Tony, please,” he begged, he didn’t even know what for, when he felt the man bottoming out. He wrapped his arms around his neck, burying his face in his shoulder, breathless, shaking all over. “Daddy...”

“I’m here, baby,” he whispered, holding still for a few minutes. Peter appreciated the gesture – he did – but he really needed more, he needed Tony to move, he needed Tony.

He rocked his hips and immediately felt his already swollen lips attacked again by the older man’s as he pulled his cock out slowly, and then gently shoved it back in. Peter squeezed his eyes shut, breathing through the pain, but he didn’t want to stop, he didn’t want time, he felt full and satiated and he just wanted that feeling to last forever.

Tony started picking up the pace, fucking into him with short, shallow thrusts at first, and then long and deep ones as Peter’s muscles relaxed and started to give in to the intrusion and suck him in deeper. Tony must have felt it because he held him down by the hips and started fucking him like he meant it, and the younger man threw his head back, crying in relief and pleasure and delicious pain, only to have his throat attacked with kisses and bites, Tony’s beard scratching against his smooth skin, leaving burns that felt like claiming marks.

“Please, I’m gonna–“ Peter didn’t have to say anything, soon there was a hand wrapped firmly around his cock, pumping it at the same pace as Tony thrust into him, and it was too fucking much, Peter bit down on the man’s shoulder and squeezed his eyes tight as came with a blinding force, body shaking all over. Tony thrust a few more times, hard and deep, as he grunted, before he pushed one final time and fell on top of him with a sigh.

Peter panted, trying to catch his breath, what proved to be tricky with the larger man lying on top of him, but he made no effort to get him to move. On the contrary, he gathered the last of his strength to hold him by the shoulders, keeping him close for as long as he could.

He must have drifted off at some point, because he was startled awake by someone sitting by his side on the bed. When he opened his eyes, the older man smiled sheepishly down at him.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you up,” he whispered, leaning down to peck his lips, before sitting up again. “I’m just gonna clean you up a little, ok?” Peter blinked a few times in confusion, until he looked down and noticed the older man had a wet towel in his hand, which he used to slowly clean his chest, belly, legs and between his butt cheeks.

The young man blushed a little, surprised by his actions, but said nothing, just watched as the Tony threw the towel to the floor and lay next to him, propping his head on a hand to look down at him.

“Do you want me to go?” He asked quietly, after a few seconds, not wanting to be an inconvenience, but Tony frowned.

“Why, do you want to go?” He asked and Peter bit his lower lip, looking into the warm, brown eyes, trying to figure out the answer the engineer wanted to hear. He shook his head no and Tony smiled softly, lifting a hand to stroke his cheek. Peter all but purred. “Then stay, kitten. I make great pancakes.”

“You don’t say.” He raised his eyebrows in honest surprise, because he didn’t think a billionaire genius would worry about mastering such a mundane task as making pancakes.

“I do say. You’ll see tomorrow morning,” he answered quietly, like a secret, as his hand traveled from Peter’s face to his hipbone, where his fingers made small circles that tickled his skin lightly. He let his head rest on the pillow next to Peter’s, their faces so close he could feel Tony’s breath on his lips.

“I saw you the other day.” Peter whispered, because it felt intimate, like they were keeping secrets from the world. Tony lifted an eyebrow in curiosity. “Well, Iron Man, I guess. Flying over Central Park.”

“Oh, yeah. I went to a meeting in the UN Security Council, but then I had to come back here in a hurry, or Pepper would kill me.” Tony had a contagious, cheeky smile, but Peter couldn’t help but notice a little sadness hiding in his eyes when he talked about his ex-wife. He wondered if Tony could see the same sadness earlier, when they were talking about Beck.

“Hmm. Trying to decide if that meeting was incredibly boring or incredibly cool.”

“Weirdly, it was both.” They laughed quietly and Tony slid closer, until their chests were almost touching. “Is this ok?” He asked and the younger man just nodded, before he arranged himself to rest his face on Tony’s chest, legs entwining in the process until they were both comfortable. They fit well together, Peter couldn’t help but think in secret.

He knew it was stupid to hope for anything other than what they’d just done, he knew it was pointless to want more, he did, he truly did. But when he closed his eyes, he imagined things were different. He imagined he had a different past and Tony had a different life, and things were simpler and easier.

He drifted off to sleep with a smile on his face, lulled by the gentle rise and fall of Tony’s chest.

-x-

Tag list (please let me know if you’d like to be added or removed from the list): @sadachmesarthim @iamnotparticularlyproud @staticwhispersinthedark @bluestarker

#starker #tony stark x peter parker

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butterflymar · 4 years

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DAY 2: FAVORITE BL DRAMA

I have quite a few... I can’t choose just one so bare with me lol

Life Senjou No Bokura

Synopsis According to MyDramaList: One day after school, the serious Ito and the child-like Nishi meet by chance, as each endeavors to remain walking on the sidewalk`s white line. As time goes by, Ito recognizes he is drawn to Nishi in a way that is new to him. Nishi, for his part, is frustrated that they only get to meet on the sidewalk. Ito decides to act upon his feelings and kisses a surprised Nishi, who agrees they need to walk side by side for a change. The sparks between them are undeniable as their relationship blossoms in high school, survives the college years, and matures into adulthood. A deeply moving work that bears witness to loving partners, whose unchanging feelings must co-exist within a world of changing realities.

My Personal Thoughts: I already wrote a review for this so I am going to re-share some of those thoughts here. This is one that I have watched countless times already. They went by the manga for mostly all of the episodes and I appreciated seeing that. They gave more context for certain details that may have been lost while reading the manga and translated it to screen. I think they depicted the age gaps well too. For 4 episodes only, I feel that they did a great job including the most important aspects. Actually now that I think of it, I would have loved to see more of them in their early 20s depicted on screen because that was like one of there honeymoon phases and I’m a hopeless romantic lol but that’s just a personal preference not complaining. Also, the show stopped at age 40 and they could have gone on throughout there entire lives but I understand why they chose not too. The manga is great as well!!! I think that the main actors depicted beautiful true love very well. They had amazing chemistry. Japanese BL’s have that special spark about them that I love. I also loved that it showed there relationship from high school till there later years. I don’t see that a lot with BL’s. They usually just stick to one time period. The aspect about them being connected by a line in relation to there love was a nice touch as well. I am glad that it has a happy ending as well. This is a pretty quick one to watch and a great one at that!!! If you haven’t watched it yet, I would highly recommend it!!!

I Told Sunset About You

Synopsis According to MyDramaList: Teh and Oh-aew were best friends until a boyhood line of reasoning turned them into rivals. Years later as they're preparing for university admissions, both pursuing interests in the field of Communication Arts, the two meet in a Chinese language class. Their reunion awakens complicated and unstable feelings.

My Personal Thoughts: Same as above, I already wrote a review for this so I am going to re-share some of those thoughts here. This is DEFINITELY one of my top BL shows of the year 2020. This is such a beautiful masterpiece of a show!!! I remember when the preview trailer first came out… I was already hooked!!! I was on the lookout for it and it did not disappoint me one bit when it finally started. I looked forward to seeing it every week. It made me feel all of the emotions. I was up here sitting in my room crying over everything. I don’t think any other BL has made me this emotional before in my life. The two lead actors really DELIVERED!!! I could feel every single stare, every single body movement, and every single touch. You could cut the TENSION with a knife!!! No one couldn’t tell me that there wasn’t a magnetic true love between these two. I know this sounds cliche but it's like they were destined to be together from when they were childhood friends. Also, I would love to see them in future projects!!! The cinematography in this show is TOP FREAKIN NOTCH!!! Every single scene is just so beautifully shot. The cinematography alone makes me want to cry lol I saw somewhere that someone said the filming of the show reminded them of an indie film and I totally agree!!! The writing and directing on this show was impeccable to me!!! No cringy dialogue and every single line served its purpose well. This is movie grade writing. I also wanted to quickly just say that I loved the attention and callback to details throughout like with the tutoring book that Teh made for Oh-aew that was left empty by the end of episode 4, the flower that was supposed to be colored the same as Tan’s garment but Teh colored it red because he was thinking of Oh-aew, the rubbing of Oh-aew’s back when he sniffles, the references to Teh’s favorite actor, and the use of Chinese phrases to get meaning across. I could go on and on but wow I just loved how they really connected all of the details throughout. I can’t wait for Season 2!!!

Theory of Love

Synopsis According to MyDramaList: Third is a filmology major and a member of the Savage Team along with his best friends Two, Bone, and Khai, but he has a secret. Third has been secretly in love with Khai for years. For three years, he has kept his secret love in his heart, silently supporting and loving Khai while knowing there is absolutely no future between them since Khai is as straight as a streetlight pole and also an absolute player. To make matters worse, Khai has a "no dating friends" policy. How long can Third love Khai silently while watching Khai bring a different girl home every night? Third has tried to see Khai as just a friend. But has failed time and time again. Because as easy as it is to fall in love, to stop is just as hard. Maybe even harder. That is until Third learns a secret that breaks his heart completely. But when Third decides to stop, Khai decides to start.

My Personal Thoughts: As sad as this show can make me feel at times, I love rewatching it. I still to this day think that it is one of the most well written BL’s that I have seen. Everything flows nicely and everything connects. Your not left wondering how you got from point A to point B. I thought the show had great character development especially when it came to Khai’s character towards the end of series. I know a lot of people had mixed feelings about his character due to how careless and dare I say stupid he acted at times but if he can make the audience hate him that much as a character... I would say he is doing something right!!! Gun’s acting never fails to amaze me!!! He really is one of the best actors I have seen. I know he had to be drained from all of that crying that he did throughout the show though lol It just goes to show that when you truly love someone you can’t just stop what you are feeling inside that easily no matter how the other person feels about you or treats you. As the old saying goes, love is blind. I also loved the friend group as well and Two and Bones side stories with the teacher and crush from school. They added to the shows greatness and didn’t take away from it. The friendship dynamics throughout the show was I feel something that really kept me engaged. The cast acted well together. There was no awkwardness or hesitation. I feel everyone bought there best for this drama. They incorporated the movie references so cleverly and I love how the title of each episode was the title of a real romance film. Just the overall theme of film was very intriguing to me. This drama left me filled with heartache and a rollercoaster of emotions but the ending is worth it!!!

HIStory3: Make Our Days Count

Synopsis According to MyDramaList: At first glance, high schoolers Xiang Hao Ting and Yu Xi Gu appear to be polar opposites: While Xiang Hao Ting is an outgoing, hot-headed extravert and some-time bully, Yu Xi Gu prefers to keep a low profile and focus on his schoolwork. They seem bound for totally different futures – the bookish Yu Xi Gu looks destined for academic success, while life is just a long popularity contest for Xiang Hao Ting. But a quirk of fate – and a crucial intervention by a female schoolmate – results in the two young men’s paths crossing. But there is more to both young men than first meets the eye. Xiang Hao Ting was not always this way. He started out as a perfect student until he discovered the joys of going off the rails. And Yu Xi Gu has a reason for being so aloof and studious: His parents died in a traffic accident while he was younger, and he is being fostered by his aunt. As such, he works hard to get good grades in an effort to win a scholarship and ease the financial burden on his relatives. Yu Xi Gu also works part-time at a convenience store, where his manager Liu Zhi Gang has developed a crush on a man he has met at the gym. Back at school, meanwhile, Yu Xi Gu and Xiang Hao Ting find themselves drawn together, and passions ignite. The former notices that he has the unique ability to bring Yu Xi Gu out of his shell – and becomes intent on melting his cold-as-ice exterior. What will happen when their two worlds collide? And can love be the catalyst that helps bring these two unlikely students together – as their high school days draw to a close?

My Personal Thoughts: I will stand by this notion for all of my days but this show is one of the best shows I have seen PERIOD!!! Not even best BL shows I have seen but just in general. It highkey saddens me that it is rated at an 8.1 right now on MyDramaList due to how it ended when other than that... it’s a top notch show. This was one that I watched as it was airing and I would get excited to see it every week. My clown self should have known by the title “Make Our Days Count” that some mess was about to occur but I didn’t pick up on it. Now, I just disregard the last episode (WE DON’T KNOW HER!!!). You can just tell that they had a great budget for this series. The production was on point. It had great cinematography, great storylines, and it felt realistic too. The main couples acting was OFF THE CHARTS AMAZING. I loved the whole opposites attract thing going on. Although the show was set in high school... it almost didn’t feel like it nor did it have those typical clichés going on. I liked how it dealt with topic of LGBTQ+ acceptance as well. I wasn’t so sure about the side couples relationship at first but I grew to love them as time went on. One last thing I wanted to point out was that even though I am always looking for a happy ending... I learned from this show that not everyone can get a happy ending. That’s not how life works sadly. In real life, there have been a lot of people who were truly in love and lost there partners tragically. Although it may be hard to accept the outcome, it is something that happens in real life. This is a drama that you appreciate even more as time goes on. It truly is a gem of a series!!!

TharnType

Synopsis According to MyDramaList: Type Thiwat is a handsome freshman with a passion for football and spicy food. Although he’s a friendly boy, he hates gay people because, in his childhood, he was molested by a man. His life turns upside down when the new academic year of college brings along a charismatic roommate, Tharn Kirigun. Tharn is a gorgeous, compassionate music major, who is also openly gay. When Type learns this, he is determined to make Tharn leave the dorm, as he won't live with a gay person. Tharn is equally determined not to give into Type's homophobic tantrums. With a gay guy and a homophobic guy that have to share a small space together for the rest of the year — what can possibly be the outcome of their story? Hatred? Or maybe love?

My Personal Thoughts: *Goes to hide in a corner* I know this drama is problematic and controversial as hell but it’s like a train wreck that you can’t turn away from. What truly carries the show I feel is the chemistry between MewGulf. I don’t think I would have enjoyed the series as much if other actors were cast in those roles. They just exude confidence, passion, love, and lust. In terms of the storyline, I found it to be a chaotic occurrence of situations where I just had to know what was going to go on next. Everything that occurred had me intrigued for the next episode and so on and so forth. I loved Type’s character development. One quick thing I want to touch on was I know there were a lot of problematic things that happened which I will touch on at a later date but one thing I wish people were more understanding of was Type’s outbursts, thoughts, and feelings in certain situations. He was a victim of sexual assault so I felt the way he handled certain things was in response to what he had gone through as child and I think some viewers kind of missed that and were almost too harsh on him. Everyone processes and deals with trauma differently. This show went through so many twists and turns and I honestly lived for it especially the shocker towards the end of the series. I didn’t see that one coming at all!!! Despite all of its flaws, this show still holds a special place in my heart.

Honorable Mention:

Cherry Magic: As of today, this show has 4 episodes left and I think I am just going to come out and say that THIS IS MY FAVORITE BL OF THE YEAR!!! It’s a beautiful Japanese BL and I rewatch the old episodes while I wait for new ones to come out alot. It’s such a fluffy, heartwarming, and precious Bl series!!! I love it to pieces!!!

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fragmentedink-archived · 3 years

Text

Hell to Pay: Chapter Fifty-Two

I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, IX, X, XI, XII, XIII, XIV, XV, XVI, IX, IX, XX, XXI, XXII, XXIII, XIV, XV, XVI, XVII, XVIII, XVIIII, XXX, XXXI, XXXII, XXXIII, XXXIV, XXXV, XXXVI, XXXVII, XXXVIII, XXXIX, XL, XLI, XLII, XLIII, XLIV, XLV, XLVI, XLVII, XLVIII, XLIX, XLX, LI

cowritten by @lux-scriptum

A/N: Hey everybody!!! It’s been a hot minute. We’ve been busy lately between work and life and all that fun stuff but here’s a new chapter <3

A/N: So we’re changing a lil bit up, and adding more characters, specifically the gods as we’ve been doing more world building lately. These Gods are also from my own WIP, but have also found their way here!

“I just don’t understand why you need specific wood from a specific place for the crib,” Lev muttered, splashing the water with his foot as he watched Nik paddle around. Nik still wore a large shirt even in the pool, as if Lev and Cameron didn’t know he was pregnant.

"Well, Lev," Nik said. "Not all of us are okay with using hand-me-downs from four hundred years ago. Some of us like new shiny things for new shiny parasites- I say with love- and besides, its native to Tullum. It's home; at least as close to home as I'll likely get."

Lev huffed. “I didn’t mean that you had to get hand-me-downs, if you don’t want to. But I figured asking for wood specific to a region of angel territory when neither of us can go to retrieve it... It’s just a big fuss to make, I guess.” He braced his hands on the side of the pool, leaning forward a bit. “I don’t- Cameron had lots of very pretty options, is all, I guess.”

Nik arched a brow, eyeing him dryly. "And where, exactly, do you think some of those woods come from, Levant?"

Lev hesitated. “I assumed demonic territory?” he finally said, very unsure of the answer now.

Nik splashed Lev with enough force Lev was drenched, spluttering. Before he could think of how to respond, Cameron popped Lev gently on the back of his head. Lev hadn’t even noticed Cameron approach.

As Lev looked up, Cameron simply said, “Come inside. Biela requires your presence. Both of you.”

Lev stood, looking back to Nik, who was hauling himself out of the pool. Since Nik had already soaked him, Lev tucked himself against Nik’s side as they went inside.

Biela was standing in the kitchen. Without looking at them, she simply said, “Take a seat.”

Lev peeled away and settled in a chair, but Nik folded his arms over his stomach, which was beginning to show by that point, and said, "And why should-"

Cameron sliced Nik a look. "Nikolas, sit the fuck down."

At those cold words, Nik promptly sat on the nearest stool without another word.

Lev reached for Nik’s hand. Something told him he would not like whatever Biela had to say. Nik’s fingers tightened around his briefly as they waited for Biela to speak.

Biela fixed her dark gaze on Nik first. “I’m assuming you are keeping the fetus.”

It wasn’t a brief squeeze this time. “Why?” Nik asked sharply.

“Nik,” Lev said softly.

Biela held up a hand in Lev’s direction. “Because I'm also assuming you'd want to know the magic used to bring your boyfriend back from the dead poisoned my lands and is killing countless children. That's why."

Cold washed over Lev, colder than the death that he knew still tugged at his bones. “What?” he blurted, barely a whisper.

"You," Biela said, squarely looking Lev in the eye, "And your cousin and that witch played with forces beyond your control and decided to poison my lands with your greed because you just couldn't leave death well enough alone. I figured since your mate is currently pregnant, that you might want to know what is happening to the infants being born. Much like Nik's infant soon enough."

Lev risked swinging his attention to Cameron, eyes wide. He knew he was digging his nails into Nik’s hand as he searched Cameron’s expression, but for the most part it was unreadable, the usual shrouded calculation flickering in his eyes. Lev looked back to Biela after a moment.

“I didn’t know,” he finally said, voice small.

“Clearly not. You seem to know nothing.”

“I’m sorry,” Lev said, finally shifting his attention to Nik. “I’m sorry.”

The blood had drained from Nik’s face. “You’re lying,” he said, the words a harsh counterpoint to Lev’s whispered apology.

"And why would I lie about such a thing?"

"Because you despise me, and you loathe Lev and want any excuse to put Lev back in the ground."

Biela’s mouth curled in a non-smile. "If I was going to put your precious Lev back where he belonged, I'd do so without needing such a cruel lie. I'd just do it."

Lev tugged on Nik’s hand. “Nik,” he said, a warning in his tone this time. “She’s right.”

Tears of anger welled in Nik's eyes. "This is bullshit. This is absolute bullshit. I just decided to keep the thing. Now you're telling me it'll die anyways?"

Greif coiled alongside the fear and guilt. “You didn’t have to tell us,” Lev said to Biela. “Thank you,” he added, before tugging at Nik again. “We’ll figure it out, Nik. You- you could stay with Nate, couldn’t you?”

Nik's mouth pressed into a thin line. "But this is my home," he said, voice breaking.

Steadily, Biela said, "Not every child has been born dead or scarred. Perhaps your blood will… protect it in some way. Healing it."

Lev pressed his face to Nik’s shoulder. “You should talk to Ash. Or Sazra. Both of them.”

Nik stood abruptly. “I’m going to bed,” he muttered, as if it wasn’t midafternoon. Lev watched him go in silence, his heart aching.

Only once he was gone did Lev look back to Biela. “I’m sorry,” he repeated. “Is there anything I can do?” He meant it, knew she’d read that in his mind, and hoped it meant... something. Though he doubted it did.

Biela leaned against her palms, black hair slipping over her shoulder. "What do you think you can do? You and your cousin offer your pretty apologies while countless are dead like a few well placed 'sorries' will give parents their young once more. I highly doubt putting you back where you belong would solve it, and as I promised your cousin, I wouldn't. You will live with your actions and you will think about how this has affected my kingdom. And you will think about how my mercy has been the only thing keeping you with a home. Not even your own people want you. And now, you're a mass murderer to my people. That is what you can do."

Her words hurt, as they were meant to, he was sure, but he heard no untruth. “I would never assume that an apology would fix anything,” he promised carefully. “I will never forget the cost; I promise. But-” He hesitated. “I know most demons don’t appreciate an angels healing. I have the magic to spare, if it is ever useful. I understand that- it’s not- it’s all I can offer.”

Biela arched a brow. "I'll keep it in mind. If there's something to make you useful, I'll look into it. It's the least you can do."

“It is,” Lev agreed, grief leaking into his tone despite himself. “Thank you,” he added again, before lowering his gaze to the ground. Any more, he thought, and he might say too much.

"And you're not even crying," Biela noted. "An improvement." She straightened, readying to leave. "I'll return for our check up. I expect you to behave in the meantime."

On her way out, Cameron dipped his head in a reverent bow.

Lev waited until her footsteps faded before he looked to Cameron. “What are we going to do?” he asked.

All Cameron said was, "Survive."

-----

After nearly a week of Amara seemingly dodging every appointment Ash tried setting up with her, Ash decidedly went to see Nik so he didn't hunt her down and wring her neck. It seemed like the better alternative.

It was Lev who answered the door. Hesitantly, Lev asked, "Am I allowed to talk to you?"

"Well," Ash said, looking over Lev’s head, "if you weren't, you'd be a little too late now. Where's Nik?"

Lev flushed, cheeks going a blotchy gold. “In bed,” he said, sounding sad. “I’m assuming you heard, then.”

Ash blinked. "Heard what? I just needed to check on him. Did something happen to Nik?" He asked, shouldering his way past Lev. "Is he alright?"

“Oh.” Lev seemed to hesitate. “Fine. Nik is. I think. I mean, he is, but-” His voice got smaller and smaller. “Whatever Cyrus did to bring me back- the magic- infants are dying. Not making it to birth. Biela told us a few days ago. I assumed that’s why you were here. I thought Nik had taken my advice.”

At that Ash halted in place and whirled on him, face leeched white with horror and rage. "Wanna run that by me again?"

Lev flinched away. “The magic poisoned the lands,” he whispered. “The children are dying because I came back."

"I-." Ash inhaled sharply. "I told you. I told every single one of you not to do it. I hope you're fucking happy with yourself," he snapped, jabbing him in the chest. "None of you selfish assholes would listen to me and children are dead for it." Ash whirled back around and stormed his way to Nik's bedroom. "And now I need to make sure another one doesn't die because of everyone's bad choices."

Nik jolted up when Ash burned the door in place to stalk inside. He didn't give Nik a moment to speak before he started doing what he did best. "Have you been keeping everything down? Any fevers or anything beyond the usual normal pregnancy stuff?"

Nik blinked blankly at him. "How the hell am I supposed to know? Because I'm an omega? I-"

"My mistake," Ash said. "I shouldn't have asked you. Lev, has everything been normal with Niks pregnancy so far?"

Lev hovered in the charred doorway. “Other than morning sickness that Cameron and I have been keeping an eye on, everything seems fine. I didn’t think to ask Biela how the- what was happening to the parents. I was- it was a shock.”

"Oh I'm sure," he said, shortly. He turned his full focus back on Nik. "Is there any way I can convince you to come home at least until the baby is born?" When Nik shook his head, Ash sighed. "Right. Well, at least meet me for appointments every few days in Liwen. That way you get exposure outside of Demonic Lands as well as getting a better look in my office?"

Nik sat up on his elbow and watched him warily. “Papi doesn’t want me coming home, Ash.”

Ash rolled his eyes and eyed the bruising still fading from Nik’s neck. “Hm. Well. I don’t think your father is going to get to say much of anything when I hold just as much, if not more power and sway than he does. Besides, you’re not stepping foot anywhere near him, especially when you’re pregnant. I’m sure Nate would have my head. Or at the very least try.”

Nik didn’t so much as crack a smile. “I don’t want to go home.”

Ash sighed loudly. “Alright, fine then.” When Lev tried scooting his way past to Nik, Ash shoved his face away. “Move it, I’m dealing with my patient, Lev.” When Lev huffed Ash looked pointedly at him. “If that’s too much to ask,” he suggested, “then perhaps you can see yourself outside while we talk.”

Lev’s only response was making a face. “I think I’m going to go see what Cameron’s making for dinner.”

When Lev left, Ash turned his sole focus back to Nik who was still looking rather tired. “You gotta let me help,” he said. “We both know I’m the best you’re going to get when it comes to your health.”

“Dunno. Sazra seems to know plenty.”

“Sazra hasn’t seen the light of day in well over a thousand years. That,” he said, “and from what you’ve told me, Sazra also wants to string you up by your balls. Your physiology is different from demons and as great as a healer I’m sure she is, I am your healer and I’m not trusting a demon to take care of you when I’ve known you for the last nineteen years.”

Nik waved him off. “Figure it out, Ash. I don’t want to leave.”

“Because of Lev?” Ash asked, pointedly.

“And if it is?” Nik shot back.

“Then you’re making stupid choices for your baby.”

Nik almost looked like Ash hit him. Ash tried to reel back from that very poor choice of words, but even if he was successful at it, he still didn’t regret them. It was the truth especially when there were millions of infants dead because Ash didn’t stop Amara or Cyrus and now Nik was in the line of fire for his own inactions. “Look,” Ash warned, “if you won’t come back then I’m moving in here and I will make everyone who lives in this house as miserable as physically possible.”

“Like Cameron would let you.“

Ash scoffed. “You think I’m afraid of Wonder Bread Cameron? I get what I want and what I currently want won’t come back with me.”

Nik’s brows shot up at that, but before he could say anything Lev came slinking his way back into the room. “Mami’s actually in charge of dinner tonight so Cameron’s in his office. He looks kinda grumpy.”

“Surprise of surprises, I’m sure,” Ash said. He looked back to Nik. “So what is it, you coming with me voluntarily or am I moving in here against all of your wills?” When Nik stared at him in stony silence, Ash took that as answer enough. He got up from the bed and shouldered his way past Lev.

----

Ash was still being cranky, and Nik was still in bed. Lev wasn’t stupid enough enough to bother Cameron again, and so when he heard Eden waking up from her afternoon nap he decided to go pick her up before she upset the whole house with her fussing.

Even if he was supposed to be limiting how much he picked her up.

After some well placed smacks for not getting to her soon enough, Eden buried her face in his shoulder with a half-awake growl. Lev gave her a little bounce and settled in the rocking chair, toy in hand to offer her when she bothered to lift her head.

Only when several minutes had passed did Eden finish her little sniffle-growls and take the stuffed bear. Within seconds the ear was detached.

Lev sighed as he fished it out of her mouth. Eden took the chance to sink her little teeth into his finger, hard enough to draw blood. Before Lev could pull away, Eden gave a pleased shriek, little nails digging into his hand to keep him there. Despite the surprising amount of strength the toddler had, he managed to get free, in time for Ash to stick his head in the room, eyes glowing enough of a bright green that Lev was quite sure Ash was seeing just fine.

“I just can't seem to leave you alone for five minutes without you nearly getting killed by demons,” Ash grumbled.

Lev shrugged, catching Eden’s little hand before she could smack him again. “Hitting isn’t nice, bitty girl.”

She simply screeched in his face, and then thunked her forehead on his shoulder, giggling.

Lev looked up at Ash. “I’ve been meaning to tell you,” he said as Eden took her bear back and began the gruesome work of beheading it. “Well, I mean- I wasn’t sure how to because I wasn’t sure if we were allowed to talk, and then you needed to check on Nik, and-” He paused, blinking hard. “Rambling. Sorry. I’m trying to work on that. I remembered things, about when I was dead.” He pressed a kiss to Eden’s head to buy himself some time to order his thoughts, and then went on. “I met Nature. During that time I was hesitating. And they talked to me.”

“Oh? And you didn’t bother to tell me this sooner?”

Lev winced. From what he’d gathered from the conversation with Nature, the link between Ash and the god ran deeper than Lev had ever realized. Not that Lev had ever really paid attention to it. He’d never been particularly close to Nature himself; he was starting to regret not trying to forge a connection with the only god the angels had. Maybe his magic would have been easier to access, stronger even, if he had.

“I didn’t remember for a long time,” he finally said to Ash. “But I do now, so I’m telling you.”

It’d been an intense conversation, for sure. He could see a lot of Ash in Nature. Or maybe there was a lot of Nature in Ash. Lev wasn’t too sure how the mechanics of it worked. Nature had all but berated him for dragging his feet. Just from past experience they knew if the spell failed it’d have unimaginable consequences, and Lev now knew just how bad it could have been.

“I promised them I would be the last resurrection,” he told Ash. “And I said if that failed, that I’d help take some of the- the punishment you suffered. It’s not fair for you to be in that much pain on your own.”

“Ya think?” Ash snipped.

Lev took a small breath, and then replied calmly, “I really am sorry, Ash. It was the least I could do, I thought.”

Ash rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Tell me everything you talked about.”

“A lot of it was... kind of scolding. About trying to come back,” Lev admitted. “And telling me there were going to be consequences either way. They laid out exactly what you went through while not stopping us.” Lev cleared his throat. “I- that's when I offered. To help shoulder the pain.” After tucking his cheek against Edens hair, he held up a hand, weaving his shadows through his fingers with ease. “I think that might be why my magic is stronger. I was going to try to- to find more ways to connect with them, but I’ll have to wait until I can go back to angelic territory now, I think.”

“Why? There’s temples here.”

“Oh. I didn’t-” He stopped, frowned. “I don’t know much about demons and the gods-” He sighed this time. “I’m still on house arrest. I’m not allowed to leave until Biela deems me not a security risk.”

Ash lifted a brow. “Aren’t you in a relationship with a demon?”

“We’ve never had a conversation about religion, Ash,” Lev said with an even deeper frown. “I don’t think Cameron’s particularly religious. I guess I could ask him about the demonic gods. All I know is that they’re where demons get their magic, like we do from Nature.”

“They have a name, you know,” Ash said. Lev couldn’t figure out if he sounded irritated or tired. “It’s Asmi.”

Lev flushed. “I- I’m sorry,” he mumbled. He cleared his throat, and said more firmly, “No one really calls them by their name, but I should- I should have asked.”

“Probably,” Ash said drily. “And technically they’re not even the god of nature.”

Lev stood up, bouncing Eden on his hip. “They aren’t?” He asked. “That’s what we were taught in primary school, I’m sorry.”

“Primary school?” Ash said. If Lev didn’t know better, he was teasing him now. Crankily, sure, but still.

Rather than dignify that with an answer, Lev gave up and let a very wiggly Eden down to crawl around the nursery.

“Asmi is the god of balance,” Ash finally said. “They’re tied to the earth. Anything falls out of balance, and we’re all affected. That’s probably where the angels got nature from.”

“Makes sense why the teachers simplified it like that, I suppose,” Lev replied. “If it’s- if it’s not too much trouble, could you teach me more, whenever you get the chance?”

“Sure. Looks like I’m rooming with you for the foreseeable future anyway.”

“Thank you,” Lev said, smiling at Ash. He didn’t get one in return, but considering the amount of pain Ash had gone through in the past several months because of Lev, he didn’t blame Ash. Not one bit.

~~~

There was only so much of Nik’s day being spent in bed Lev could stand before he felt restless himself. Even taking care of Eden couldn’t shake his inherent need to be a busy body. So when it occurred to him that Nik had not yet actually celebrated his pregnancy, he decided it was high time something good be associated with Nik’s pregnancy.

After all, it was tradition.

Lev waited until Eden was down for her nap to corner Cameron and Ash in the kitchen. “I think Nik deserves a baby shower,” he said without preamble. “And I think we should throw him one.”

“Of course you do,” Cameron said, not even looking up from the meat he was searing in a skillet.

Lev looked expectantly at Ash, who just gave a shrug. “Might as well get him out of that foul mood of his.”

“He’s no reason to be happy about what’s going on,” Lev replied reasonably. When Ash narrowed his eyes at Lev, the lack of a glow to his green gaze letting Lev know he wasn’t actually able to see him right now, Lev was quick to add, “So I want to... give him some happier memories about this pregnancy. He’s so miserable right now and all he’s gotten is bad news. A party will cheer him up and maybe give him something to look forward to.”

“Are you suggesting he isn’t looking forward to the several horrendous hours of labor to push that fetus out?” Cameron asked, flicking a look Lev’s way.

Lev blinked. “Well. No, I doubt that. But. The after? Holding the baby? I don’t think he’s thought that far. He’s just stressed and worried.”

“That was sarcasm, Levant,” Ash pointed out.

“Oh.” Lev rubbed his nose. “Um. Well. I do think it’s a good idea.”

“Alright. Fine. I’m sure we can have something set up this weekend.”

“Thank you,” Lev said to Cameron, looking pleased. Up until he realized... “Who can we invite”?”

“Well, that is indeed the question, isn’t it?” Ash mused.

“Can Nate be invited?”

“I sure hope so, Nate practically raised him,” Ash said dryly.

Lev grimaced at him, knowing very well he couldn’t see it. “Yes, but- am I allowed to be there if he is?”

“I think it’ll be fine, especially if Bay is with him.”

After considering that, Lev gave a small nod. “Okay. Can I help plan for it, Cameron?”

“I suppose,” Cameron said.

Lev gave a small hum. “Ocean themed? To match the nursery?”

“Sure,” Cameron said, with the same amount of indifference as before.

This time Lev huffed at Cameron. “I’m going to go see if Mami wants to help,” he said, knowing it was a little petty.

“You do that,” Cameron said.

As Lev... well, even he could admit he was flouncing off a bit, Ash followed. Lev took that as a silent agreement to actually participate in the planning.

---

Darius found himself in Cyrus’ office with a mug of tea in front of him and Cyrus across from him with his own coffee. Even if Darius couldn’t drink the tea, he did appreciate the gesture. It would be nice to be able to drink tea once more.

“Why Cameron?” Cyrus asked, not in an accusatory way, but genuine curiosity.

“Why not Cameron?” Darius asked, splaying his brown fingers along the desk.

Cyrus gave a shrug as he continued to flip through his notes, coffee seemingly forgotten. “He’s not exactly the sort most people seem to be attached to. Outside yourself, Nikolas, and Levant, of course. Most others seem frightened more than anything.”

“I don’t see why,” Darius said. “Cameron’s never been frightening to me.”

“Perhaps it's the amount of people he’s tortured and killed,” Cyrus pointed out mildly. He looked up briefly. “I mean no offense, I simply want to understand.”

Darius thought on that, and he thought on the boy he had known when he was alive. And he thought on the hell that was unleashed upon Cameron once it was found that Darius had died at Cameron’s own hand. And then he said, “Perhaps. Though, I do not judge a person by their occupation. One could say Sorin has killed his own fair share of people, no?”

Cyrus looked over at Sorin, who was curled up as a cat on a pile of papers, orange tail twitching against his white flank as he dozed. “He did,” Cyrus agreed. “And he retired. But you made your point. I see where you’re coming from.” He looked back to Darius. “The war made a monster out of many people. But something tells me the war is not what happened to Cameron.”

“Just a different kind of war,” Darius sighed. He traced along one of his rings. “Have you come up with a solution that would not let Cameron die in the process?” Even if Darius was quite sure Cameron wouldn’t blink at the idea of giving his own life to right this particular wrong- even when the last five hundred years had Cameron’s story of survival written in betrayal and blood.

“I considered just... any life. But- that doesn’t seem a fair trade,” Cyrus sighed, running his own ringed fingers over his face. “I’m not willing to attempt the spell without certainty. The cost of failure is too high, and it’s your only chance.”

“Of course,” Darius said. “I do not take any of this lightly. I am very grateful to you, Cyrus.”

Cyrus gave a small smile, though his face was tired. “Don’t thank me,” he said. “Not until after I guarantee this will work.” He propped his chin in his hand. “It’s starting to look like there’s no way for me to be sure what is an acceptable trade, unless I speak with Nature themself.” Cyrus paused. “Which would be difficult, because I’ve never tried to form any sort of connection with Nature before. I didn’t get the education most witches do from their covens, and I was learning so much about the practical side that it slipped my mind.”

“Well,” Darius said, “I am sure there is no time like the present to get acquainted with your god.” Something Cameron, too, was unable to do. “Asmi seems… sturdy.”

Cyrus hummed. “Sturdy. Concrete. Something like that. I think.” He tapped his cheek. “I have no idea how to go about it, though.”

“I could reach out,” Darius offered. “Seeing as how I’m in the same realm as they are. And there’s less risk to you if I were to approach them first.”

Cyrus considered that. “That would... be very helpful, actually,” he mused. He leaned back in his chair with a sigh. “Though perhaps after I take a nap.”

Tagging: @incandescent-creativity @solangelo3088 @lil-miss-red @halstudies @littleyellowdinosaur @caelisis @idreamonpaper

#writeblr #writers on tumblr #wip boost #hell to pay #original writing #ch: cameron #ch: darius #ch: nik #ch: biela

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echo-three-one · 3 years

Text

A Forgotten Memory

An Alex x OC fic

Chapter Eleven (Wow I initially planned to end it at 10)

Zelda Link to Chapter 1 (along with directory) here

Reviews and Corrections appreciated as I love to grow as an author.

Enjoy~

XI - Alex

The long walk toward the highest point of the forest was quiet and awkward. Guess that happens after the first time couples do it and Alex assumed she was just adjusting. She did tell him it was quite a while since she done it. So he did what's best to keep the awkwarness at minimum by initiating conversation.

"Samantha, you've been umm... quiet since we left. Is there any problem? Are you hurt?" Alex finally asked, scratching his chin while doing so.

Samantha quickly turned to her side as Alex turned his head on her.

"I'm fine, Alex. It's just... I'm just thinking about things..." she trailed off, touching some leaves as they walked.

Alex turned his head back to the path and sighed. When a woman thinks about something, it goes a lot more way back, someone from the CIA once told him that they're expert history seekers and Alex thought maybe it's something he said way back. And they always converse back in the safehouse.

"A penny for your thoughts?" Alex asked, picking up a flat rock, pretending it's a penny. Samantha chuckled and grabbed the 'penny', looking at him with utmost adoration. This guy may be all tough looking, but he's actually a caring person, it makes it harder for her to move on once it's all over.

"Fine, I'll bite." she replied, gripping the penny tight.

"What would happen to us when this is all over?" She asked. Alex stopped in his tracks and turned to her.

"You mean us? Right? This thing we're having?" he clarified, pointing to the both of them.

"Well, I'm bound to take a break after this mission. I was actually planning to ask you out on a vacation, if that's okay with you." He replied, the tone of his voice sounded shy as he scratched the back of his head, avoiding eye contact.

Silence.

Alex patiently waited for her response, hoping she'd say yes as they continued on the trail. He started to feel nervous as the general consensus running in his thoughts is going to be a solid 'NO'.

Alex leaned on a huge tree atop the highest possible vantage point, exhaling away the exhaustion. He then felt her smooth arms wrapped around him, and her face buried on his back.

"I know you want this to work..." She croaked.

"... and I know in my heart that I do too..." She sobbed.

"...but I can't live loving you with worry in my heart..." Alex grabbed her hand and locked his on hers.

"... and I don't want to be the reason that you'll stop saving the world. I know you want that. It's your job to. It's what you built your whole life to become..." Tears started falling again. Alex sighed and turned back as he wrapped his arms around her tight.

"I'd love to make it work between us. I know you could feel that." He assured, rubbing her back and resting his chin on her head.

"... I love you, Alex. I really do... but if you're still in the line of fire after all this then I can't handle it. The feeling of anxiousness, the constant question if you'll ever come back in one piece. Not after what I've experienced before." Alex sighed. She made sense and he respected it. She's been through a lot moving on from his ex who died in an accident, and considering Alex's line of work, he's just going to make her worry.

He couldn't fight the tears as the realization set in. He could feel his knees weaken and they both slowly knelt and cried. Even though the CIA trained Alex on suppressing emotion, he couldn't help but feel a love that's not meant to be. But then again, they both knew this was bound to happen, they both agreed to feel the pain of goodbye, but they never knew it would hurt this bad.

"I love you too." He whispered as she looked up to him.

"Let's go. I still have to escort you to safety." He smiled, his eyes were still red from the tears, but no matter what, Samantha swore to herself that she's never going to forget his longing stare.

Alex pointed at the looming building not too far from them, civilization a glimmer of hope sparkled in his eyes. He noted that they were both hungry and the thick forestry wasn't able to provide food. They'll have to reach there soon before they run out of energy.

"Just a few more clicks - er.. yards." he turned to Samantha, who's hands are already on her knees and panting heavily.

"Can we take a break? I'm really exhausted." she whined, Alex quickly lifted her on his back causing her to yelp in surprise.

"You're okay with this?" He asked, letting out a little chuckle.

"Won't you get tired? I'm kinda heavy, you know."

"You're making me look like I'm not a soldier! Just trust me, okay?" he remarked as they continued their trail to the nearby village.

"If you insist." She pouted, comfortably leaning her body on Alex. Leaves rustled as they forged their own path to the tall building Alex saw by the hilltop. Samantha took this time to enjoy the quiet hum of the forest mixed with Alex's breathing.

"What about you? What would you do when all of this is over?" He asked, breaking the silence. She chuckled at the question, then silence followed.

"I'm for sure be back in that big house again, like a caged bird yearning for freedom." she said, looking up at the sky as a flock of birds pass by opposite the slow movement of the clouds.

"It took me years to fight for that freedom only to be stripped away from me... Sometimes, I wish I wasn't born with a very important person as a parent. It sucks." she sighed, leaning back to Alex, savoring the last moments she could do it to him. As promised, once she is home safe, their little getaway romance will all be over.

Alex slightly turned his head to her, smiling as he felt her breathing slowed down. He let her take this moment to rest for a while. The forest has exhausted them physically, mentally and romantically, and Alex was more than willing to carry her out of this place.

"Hey sleepyhead." Alex nudged her as she slowly woke up, panicking as she wiped off her drooling mouth.

"I hope whatever you're dreaming of was drool-worthy." he winked at her, making her blush in embarrassment.

"Well, maybe it wasn't you. So don't be too cocky." She retorted, looking around.

"Where are we?"

"In a small local town somewhere in Brazil. Based on the Portuguese people and the kids playing soccer, or uh.. Football." he replied, pointing his thumbs by the children.

"Wish we had money. I'm so hungry, I could smell everything in here." the CIA Agent looked at her with worry. Samantha looked down in dissappointment and soon realized that she might solve their problem.

"Here. Find someone who could buy this." She handed him her pendant. At first, Alex hesitated, insisting that she doesn't have to do it but his mind soon changed as he heard her stomach growl like a lion.

"Come on. Let's get you something to eat." Alex grabbed her hand as they ventured the crowded marketplace. Samantha was really impressed on how Alex was able to quickly communicate and understand the people. One person led them to another as they finally made their way to a pawnshop. Then the next thing she knew they were already booked into a small inn and was seated on it's ground floor's mini restaurant.

Alex gave a thumbs up at the chef as he served the final meal missing from their order. Samantha was clearly amazed on how Alex managed to whip up a feast from just a piece of rock hanging on her neck. She smiled as she saw Alex hungrily scarfed down his order, and started eating on her own.

"We actually got a few extra more Brazilian Real to buy some clothes. Whatever that was in thay necklace was worth a lot." He looked at her, rice stuck on his moustache. Samantha laughed as she picked up the piece of grain from his face.

"It was a gift from my Father. Figured it would come in handy when the time comes. I'm actually happy I wore it before all of this. I wanted to get rid of it while we were on the ocean. So I guess it's a win-win for me." She replied, continuing her food.

"Let's not talk about this. Okay?" she added just before Alex could open his mouth. He then nodded and respected her privacy.

Alex was starting to feel her getting distant and he realized that she's not willing to take any more risks on him because she's afraid of committing to someone who has a high risk of not being able to come back to her again. Alex wanted to talk her out of it and ensure her safety, but it wouldn't be fair. He now understood what the song meant when it said "If you love me, let me go.."

#Yes it's P!atd #I wrote this on my bus ride home 3 hours ago #i got chased by a dog after the bus ride #codmwfic #Alex x OC #Chapter 11

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crashingmeteorz · 4 years

Text

the tea shop fight probably wouldn’t happen in my ba sing se bimbos au, but IF IT DID:

jet sees mushi heating tea, and goes through an existential crisis. what’s worse is it’s JET’S tea, so he just has to. drink the firebended tea. and try really hard. not to throw up.

on the one hand, lee is one of the best friends he’s ever had and mushi is one of about two adults jet’s ever had any respect for (the second is song’s mother).

on the other, THOSE TWO MEN...ARE FIREBENDERS!!!!!

so as you can imagine, he has something resembling a mental breakdown.

(“are you okay?” song asks him one night when he’s particularly on edge. “you’re all...sweaty.”)

(“probably because it’s extra hot in here,” jet says pointedly, staring right at zuko, who just blushes a little because he, like everyone else, assumes jet’s just flirting with him again.)

(“but we’re outside,” says song, deeply confused.)

jet finally decides he’s just going to come out and tell zuko he knows he’s a firebender, and give him about 30 seconds to explain himself Or Else.

he stalks into the tea shop with extreme purpose, and doesn’t even notice song and jin sitting at one of the tables when he walks right up to zuko and says “we need to talk.”

“unless it’s about the couple by the window and how you’re going to cram this towel down their throats, i’m a little busy,” zuko tells him as he loads up his tray and turns his back. jet leans in hovering just over zuko’s ear, and at first, all zuko can think is i’m not making out with you NOW jet!

and then jet whispers: “i know you’re a firebender,” and zuko freezes. he turns around, hoping jet will have his signature smirk on, but his mouth is a hard thin line and his brows are drawn in a sharp v.

“do you have time to talk now?” jet asks him coldly. zuko narrows his eyes and says “no.”

from their table, jin and song watch on curiously. “why don’t you think jet said hi to us?” jin asks song. “probably saw lee’s ass and didn’t even notice we were here,” answers song. they both laugh - lee doesn’t have an ass.

all of the sudden jet’s yelling and drawing his hooks. “come on!” he shouts, pointing at zuko, “show everyone what you can do!”

“you want a show?” replies zuko, snatching a nearby guard’s swords, “i’ll give you a show.”

“what in the - if they’re not careful they’ll hit mushi!” says a thoroughly pissed song at the same time jin says “song - write this down, we need to get them into Street Rumble XI!”

(street rumble is the street version of earth rumble, and also the avatar alternative to yelling WORLD STAR!)

the fight is pretty evenly matched. in this au there’s more hesitation, but it’s still intense. they knock over tables, shatter dishes, and all-around make a ruckus.

iroh meanwhile, who has come to care for jet, is calling for both of them to calm down. he doesn’t know for sure what the fights about, but he’s got a sinking feeling, based on the fury written all over jet’s face.

the fight goes outside, and obviously song, jin, and iroh follow.

“if you’re in the market for a new relative to mentor, i make a great niece! song, tell mushi what a good roommate i am,” jin says cheerily as zuko and jet almost kill each other. “don’t ask me to lie,” says song.

then the dai li show up.

“oh shit,” says jin. “we’re too poor to pay their bail!” says song.

jet and zuko pause their fight after being told to drop their weapons (they do not drop anything.) jet points at zuko and yells “tell everyone who you are!”

“he’s a young man, just like you,” says iroh. “boys, please, it’s not worth this, let’s all go back inside.”

“i’m not going anywhere with you!” roars jet.

the guards and pao tell the dai li how jet attacked without reason, how the tea boy was just defending himself. the dai li move to take jet away. song panics, and does the only thing that makes sense at the moment.

“no! don’t! it’s my fault!” she cries. she remembers what her mother taught her, about people’s assumptions and using them for survival, and she begins openly sobbing. it’s enough to get the dai li to pause.

“don’t blame yourself,” says iroh quickly, not knowing where song’s going with this but helping anyway by gently patting her shoulder. “it’s hardly your fault.”

“it is!” she cries. “it’s me - they’re fighting over me!”

“song,” jet says irritably, at the same time zuko blushes furiously and says “uhhhhhh.”

“all this...over a girl?” the guards ask. the dai li still are still hovering over jet.

“i know, it’s ridiculous!” iroh agrees. “but you know how young men can be-“

“it IS ridiculous,” jin says dramatically, stepping forward. “because i thought they were fighting over ME!”

“you?” song blubbers, doing her best impression of a person who does not think this entire skit is ridiculous. iroh thinks they’re laying it on a little thick but the crowd seems sufficiently distracted. “but-but lee said he only loved me!”

“is this true?” yells jin, rounding on the boys. jet is, if at all possible, even angrier, while zuko is rubbing the back of his neck uncomfortably.

“jin,” jet says. “i am not dealing with this right now-”

“you started this!” cries song hysterically. “making a scene, just because i said i won’t kiss you if you keep eating grass-”

iroh, who has made his way over to the dai li, gestures broadly and says “as you can see, it’s just some teenage drama. please, we can handle this. i’ll make sure the boys clean up their mess.”

the two dai li look at one another, and then nod at iroh. “if we hear of any other disturbances in this area, they’re both getting arrested,” they tell him before departing.

the crowd disperses, not really wanting to deal with song’s crying and jin’s yelling. pao goes back inside griping about closing up early. finally, when it’s just the five of them, song takes her hands away from her face, which is completely dry.

“and, scene,” says jin, bowing. “song, you were brilliant, iroh, my muse, lee and jet - the stunts could use a little work.”

“why did you have to say all that stuff?” zuko mumbles angrily. jet, meanwhile, begins to stomp away.

“because we didn’t want you to idiots to disappear!” yells song. “but i’m already regretting it! and you!” she says, rounding on jet. “you’re not going ANYWHERE until you two clean up this mess!”

“you don’t understand!” says jet. “those two - they’re-”

“why don’t we all clean up together, and then we can discuss this at the apartment?” offers iroh quickly. they may be alone, but they’re still very much in public.

“great idea,” says jin, “i have to finish transcribing the fight anyway.” song takes iroh’s arm and says, “mushi, you’re not allowed to help, you had nothing to do with this.” zuko looks at jet and shrugs, entering the tea shop. jet splutters, making a series of strangled noises, before finally sighing in defeat and following the group inside and begrudgingly cleaning up.

when they get to the apartment, iroh serves the four of them tea. jet refuses.

“i don’t want anything made by a firebender,” he hisses. song freezes. zuko rolls his eyes. iroh looks deeply sad.

“that’s what this is about?” jin says in a bored voice, sipping her tea. “i thought we all knew by now.”

“what?” shout jet, song, and zuko. iroh looks shocked.

“seriously?” asks jin. “lee, the first time we hung out you lit up, like a hundred candles at once. do you think i’m stupid? is that what you think? that i’m stupid?”

“n-no!” zuko stutters. “you knew,” jet growls “and didn’t say anything to us?” song is still fairly pale.

“i thought we all knew!” jin says. “i mean, he screwed up in front of me, like, immediately. i just figured the same had happened with you two.”

“i can’t believe it,” zuko says miserably.

“besides,” jin continues, “what’s the big deal? there’s plenty of war babies in ba sing se. and lee’s our friend. has he ever used firebending to hurt us?”

“that’s true,” song says thoughtfully. “and, that scar clearly didn’t come from a waterbender.” she takes in zuko’s embrassed expression and adds, “no offense, lee.”

“i don’t believe this,” says jet in shock. “how are you all just okay with this?”

“well, what’s he gonna do?” asks jin.

“i - i don’t know!” stutters jet. “he could - he could be spying for the fire nation!” song and jin laugh heartily, and after a minute so does jet.

“okay, okay,” jet concedes, “lee could never make it as a spy. but still-”

(“could too,” grumbles zuko, arms crossed. iroh shoots him a “for once in your life SHUT UP” look.)

“but nothing,” song says, standing up. “jet, i understand. i’ve been hurt by the fire nation, too, remember?” she pulls up her skirt and shows everyone her burned leg. zuko looks away.

“but lee didn’t do this,” song says firmly. “and neither did mushi. and you destroyed a town, so you don’t get to judge them.”

jet’s jaw drops, and then he pouts bitterly. “i never should have told you about that,” he mutters.

“i trust you three will keep our secret, then?” iroh asks at last. song and jin nod. jet looks between them, and then at zuko, who offers him something resembling an apologetic look.

“fine,” says jet. “but if i think for one second that you two are working with the fire nation, i’m not holding back.”

zuko and iroh nod aggressively, both thinking “if we so much breathed in the presence of the fire nation we’d be electrocuted by our insane relatives, but sure jet, we’re totally working with the fire nation.”

i know i said i’d post part 2 of the gaang and ba sing se bimbos meetup, but this was stuck in my head. since it’s an au of an au i’m just going to include it in my new masterpost rather than in any particular order. credit as always to the amazing @azenkii !

masterpost

#my stuff #jinjetsongko #jetko #the ba sing se bimbos #jin #jet #song #zuko #iroh #atla #avatar the last airbender

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theheartsmistakes · 4 years

Text

The Last Night Part XIV

(A/N at the end)

Parts I-XIII:

Here is Part I

Here is Part II

Here is Part III

Here is Part IV

Here is Part V

Here is Part VI

Here is Part VII

Here is Part VIII

Here is Part IX

Here is Part X

Here is Part XI

Here is Part XII

Part XIII Part XIV

James and Matthew were hovering outside the Devil’s Tavern, which presented an august Georgian facade to the mundane eyes and was the site of many a municipal meeting and festivity. Or rather, as Matthew acknowledged, James was the one hovering, conspicuous in his anxiety, while Matthew leaned against the inn’s front wall, smoking a cheroot and gazing upward in the annoying way he did when he was overcome with boredom.

The Devil’s Tavern was the only place left in London that none of their parents knew anything about. Not even Will Herondale knew about his son’s inauspicious lease in the tavern and would therefore be the safest, most logical place for them to conduct their research.

“What time did you tell them to be here?” asked Matthew, still musing at something in the sky. “I do wish you’d stop fidgeting.”

“I told them noon,” said James. “But Christopher is not the most reliable man we know.”

“He is the most reliable when something is in need of exploding or a new specimen needs to be collected,” said Matthew. “Perhaps next time tell him that you have an enchanted box that needs to be unlocked.”

“Does this feel wrong to you?” asked James. “We’re supposed to spend this hour patrolling and we’re hiding in The bloody Devil’s Tavern from our parents.”

“This is, in a sort, patrolling,” said Matthew. “We’re conducting research on how to locate your demon granddad and kill the bastard, but in order to do that, we need to find a way for you to access the shadow realm again or it’s all for not. So, we’re doing our job, just not in the way we’re expected to be doing our job.” Matthew slapped James’s hand away from his hair. “I said stop fidgeting.”

“If we’re caught…” James started but couldn’t bring himself to finish the sentence. While the four of the Merry Thieves agreed that the risk was worth the reward of defying Charles Fairchild’s newly established rules, the risk still hung over James’s head like an anvil waiting to drop. He’d reassured himself time and time again that ordinary chivalry demanded action and that his indignation had more to do with Charles’s complete need for control than the punishment being fair or responsible.

“Oh for Raziel’s sake, we won’t be,” said Matthew. “We’re trained in being discreet, remember?” Just then the door to the Tavern burst open and a head attired with goggles, poked out.

“I don’t see them,” said Christopher before he turned his head to where James and Matthew were standing. He removed his goggles up into his hair, wiped his face with an emerald scarf, and shoved the door open with his shoulder. “What are you two standing out here for? We’ve been waiting for you in the Devil for nearly twenty minutes. Thought the parentals got a hold of you.”

“You’ve been here the whole time?” asked an exasperated James. “We’ve been waiting… never mind. Get inside, quickly, before someone notices us.”

“I must admit, I’m a bit tempted to see how red my brother’s face can get if he catches us deliberately disobeying him,” said Matthew as the sound of boots clambered up the wooden stairs.

“This coming from the one having a crisis over the thought of being strapped to his brother’s desk,” said James over his shoulder. Christopher laughed ahead of them.

“That was before I witnessed my mother make him cry after threatening to strip us of our marks,” said Matthew.

James paused. “She made him cry?”

“Weep,” said Matthew. “I believe the words ‘yes, Mummy’ were said at least twice.”

“You lie!” said Christopher ahead of them.

“I exaggerate, Kit,” said Matthew as they reached their door, “but I never lie.”

The door burst open like a tightly wound jack-in-the-box as the three boys burst into the room. James walked across the room and took a seat at a small table in the window nook while Matthew made himself comfortable on the long sofa. Christopher met James at the table and busied himself with turning over the pages of an old book.

“Where have you lot been?” asked Thomas from the couch. “We’ve been waiting for you for twenty minutes.”

“They were outside,” said Christopher, examining the pages of the book.

James stood, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt to expose his forearms, as he walked to the center of the room. “All right, we have only forty minutes left of our patrol to come up with a plan on how to access the shadow world without the use of my useless power.”

“How’s that coming along?” asked Thomas.

“Am I in the shadow realm?”

“No.”

“That’s how it’s coming along.” He pressed his back against the wall opposite Matthew, Thomas, and Christopher. “It’s never felt like this before. Everything that usually works, isn’t. Chaos. Danger. Pain. Isolation. Even when I feared Lucie and Cordelia were trapped there, I still couldn’t push past this invisible wall.”

“Invisible wall?” asked Christopher.

“Yes,” said James. “That’s what it feels like, an invisible wall blocking me.”

“Perhaps you need more fiber in your diet,” grinned Matthew.

James squinted at him, unsure if he was joking, and decided to carry on without acknowledging the statement. “We need to start researching a way into the shadow realm that doesn’t involve my ability.”

The sound of chair legs scraping against the floor turned everyone’s attention towards Christopher as he shoved himself away from the table. “I’ve read about this,” he stated, excitedly. “Pockets. Uh… uh… portals they were called, but they’re like pockets in our realm to other realms. You experienced something like it at the cemetery which allowed Cordelia to access the realm after you and for Matthew and Lucie to draw you back.”

“Brilliant,” said Matthew. “Now that we have an access point, let’s come up with a plan to kill the bloody bastard.”

“Well,” said Christopher, sliding his glasses back up his nose. “We don't necessarily have an access point.”

“You just said—“

“Allow him to finish, Matthew,” said Thomas, looking like a giant inside the low ceiling room. “Go on, Kit.”

“They move.”

“The pockets?” asked James.

“Yes,” said Christopher, his almost sapphire eyes, enlarged by his lenses, glanced around at the faces staring back at him. “They appear in a spot but only remain for 12 to 24 hours.”

“Brilliant,” grumbled Matthew and slipped lower on the couch.

“Is there any way to track these pockets?” asked Thomas, while watching James stand and pace the floor.

“I cannot recall,” said Christopher. “I read about them in the forbidden section of the library at the academy. I was researching alternative methods of travel and found an extensive research that featured combinations of dimensional manipulation.”

“In English, if you would please,” said Matthew, lolling his head to look at Christopher.

“I am speaking English,” said Christopher. “If you are requesting for me to simplify it for you, then be plain about it.”

Matthew rolled his eyes as Thomas asked, “Do you remember what book it was?”

“Of course.”

“Can it be found in a public library?”

“No.” The boys released a communal exhale.

“Well,” said Matthew as he picked a piece of lint on his jade trousers. “It appears we’re left with piss but no pot.”

“Not necessarily,” said Christopher, stepping forward into the center of the room. His eyes locked on his feet the way they often were when deep in thought. “There is someone who might be in possession of a copy or at least has the authority to access one.”

James and Christopher met eyes as they both came to the same solution at exactly the same moment. A smile curved on James’s lips and he chided himself for not thinking of it sooner before allowing disappointment to consume him.

“Are you going to leave us in suspense?” asked Matthew.

“Magnus,” said James. “We’re going to see Magnus.”

. . .

The girl who came through Cordelia’s bedroom door the next morning did not seem strong enough to carry the tray on which rested a cup of tea in a florid porcelain cup and a heavy jug of hot water for the washstand. She was hollow in the cheeks and narrow shouldered, her hair pulled back mercilessly into a single braid. Her dress and apron hung loosely, and her boots looked comically laced to such scrawny ankles.

She hummed to herself as she set the tray on the floor, transferred the jug to the washstand and brought the tea, her lips clamped in concentration to keep the cup from wobbling on its gilded saucer.

“Hello,” said Cordelia, her voice rough from lack of use. “Can you please tell me where I am?”

The girl looked up, her eyes expanded as the tea fell from her hands and shattered on the floor.

Cordelia gasped, as the girl let out a scream so loud, she nearly had to cover her ears. “SHE’S AWAKE! OH BY THE ANGEL, MISS CARSTAIRS IS AWAKE! COME SEE…”

Cordelia grimaced as she braced herself on her elbows and lifted herself up. Every muscle felt as if she’d went to bed sore and hadn’t used them again for several days. The light in the room seemed aged, as if it were late afternoon or early evening. She was used to the pale dawn hours, the birds’ thin choir accompanying her waking thoughts. Curiously, she did not feel guilty for sleeping so late into the morning. The room felt familiar to her. Not the emerald green wallpaper with gold etchings or the leather winged armchair, nor the desk with the stack of books resting closest to the window. A smell in the air reminded her of something. Wherever she was, she felt safe and glad to be there.

“CARSTAIRS IS AWAKE… HURRY! QUICK!” the girl’s voice carried down the other direction of the hall along with the shuffling sound of her absurd boots.

Cordelia shifted to swing her legs out from under the heavy covers when a sharp pain in her side stole her breath.

“Best to stay put,” said a familiar voice by the door. “Until one of the Brothers gets here.”

“Alastair,” cried Cordelia. “Finally, a familiar face. Where am I?”

“The London Institute,” said Alastair, as he stepped into the room in white pin striped pajamas. A wooden crutch tucked under his left armpit as he hobbled on a bandaged foot towards her. “Where we’ve been for the last week or so.”

“Alastair,” said Cordelia, looking at his leg. “What’s happened to your leg?”

“Broke it in three different places after being thrown through the air by that demon.” The bed dipped as he sat down beside her. “Don’t fret, sister, it’s nearly healed. The Brothers want me off it while the bones properly set. I should be good as new by next week. How are you feeling?”

“Sore.” She placed her hand on her rib cage and found an extra layer of padding beneath her nightgown. “Week? You’ve said we’ve been here for the last week?”

His dark eyebrows curved in concern as his eyes looked over her face. “Cordelia, what’s the last thing you remember?”

Cordelia thought about the last memory her mind could conjure. The picture looked muddy and weak in her mind. She’s a young girl running through a patch of daisies on a cliff’s edge, but that couldn’t be right. She’s a woman grown now. Another image of London through a carriage window as the moist air off the Thames hit her face. Ice cream dripping down her hand. Dancing under seductive lights with Cortana. James’s hands on her face as he kissed her on a desk. James kissing Grace. Saying goodbye to James.

“I left,” said Cordelia, closing her eyes to stop the memory. “We left, together. We were going to Alicante.”

“Yes,” said Alastair. “Do you remember what happened after? Do you remember the attack?”

“Attack?” asked Cordelia. “No, I don’t remember any attack. What happened?”

Alastair placed his on top of hers. “Maybe we should wait for Uncle to arrive.”

Cordelia gripped his hand in her own. “Alastair, what happened? What attack? Is everyone all right?”

He opened his mouth to answer when footsteps filled the hall and a chorus of people filtered in through the doorway. A sobbing Sona pushed ahead of everyone and enveloped Cordelia in a hug. Her mother felt weak, frail underneath Cordelia’s hands, she could feel the bones protruding from her shoulders and the bumps of her spine through the thick fabric of her dress. Her shoulder bone bumped Cordelia’s chin as she peered over it to see her Uncle Jem, dressed in his robes and quiet as a statue against the wall. In front of him stood Tessa Gray beside her husband Will. She watched the doorway, hoping and dreading, for James to walk through.

When he did not, she closed her eyes to stop the burn behind them and the pit that grew ever wider inside of her stomach.

“My darling, are you all right?” Sona asked, caressing Cordelia’s cheeks and hair. Cordelia noted the hollowness in her mother’s cheeks.

“I think so,” said Cordelia. “Alastair was just telling me about an attack?”

“You don’t remember?”

“No,” said Cordelia and looked to her Uncle. “I don’t remember anything past leaving the Institute with Alastair for Alicante.”

“It’s not uncommon for some memory loss to occur after the sort of head injuries she endured,” said a quiet voice inside of her mind, but everyone else seemed to hear it too as they all turned to Brother Zachariah. “With some rest and recollection of events, the memories may return to her.”

Sona sat on the bed beside Cordelia, their hands still joined. “You were attacked by a demon. It poisoned you with a barb in your rib cage. When Lucie and James found you, you were nearly dead from your injuries.”

Cordelia pressed her hand harder against her ribs until she felt the sharp pain of a recent injury under the pressure. “Why did it attack our carriage? Demons don’t normally just attack a random carriage.”

“We were hoping that you could tell us,” said Will across the room. “We’ve tried to locate it, but it left no other traces of itself except for the attack against you and your brother. No other sightings. No suspicious activity. Alastair can only recall up to the point of being thrown by the thing, but you were still conscious at that point. We thought maybe you killed it before succumbing to your injuries, but the lack of demon blood at the scene suggests otherwise.”

Cordelia closed her eyes and attempted to stumble through her memories again. She recalled arriving with Alastair to the Herondale manor. Alastair walking her to the door with an umbrella to shield her from the pouring rain. She was trembling at the thought of what she was about to do, of what she was about to lose. Alastair offered to go in with her, but she declined.

She couldn’t recall who answered the door or how she got up the stairs to the library where James often hid away from the world in the comfort of his father’s collection of books. She couldn’t recall knocking, but she remembered him answering the door and the orange glow of the firelight that matched the color of his eyes. She remembered the relief those eyes when it was she he opened the door to.

She could vaguely remember the words that were said, or when she left him, or finding herself back in the carriage with Alastair, but the look in his eyes when she said goodbye would remain with her forever.

“No.” She cleared her throat. “No, I’m sorry. The last thing that I remember is leaving here after saying goodbye to James.”

“It’s all right,” whispered Sona as she stroked Cordelia’s hair. “You’ve only just woken up. Perhaps after you’ve had something to eat and talked with Lucie, or James, something will return to you.”

The feeling of something she needed to do sparked at the mention of her old friend. She needed to talk to Lucie.

“Lucie stepped out for the morning,” said Tessa, eyeing Cordelia sympathetically, “but she’s due to return any moment. She’ll be overjoyed to know that you’re awake.”

“And James?” Sona asked.

“On patrol,” answered Will, with a gentle hand on his wife’s shoulder. “He won’t be back until this evening.”

Cordelia looked away, at her brother’s bandaged leg, at the tear in the hem of her nightgown, at the rune etched into the top of her bare foot, as the memories of her last conversation with James crashed into her.

“I wanted so badly to marry you,” she said. “But a year with you, as your wife, is not possibly long enough.”

The thought of speaking to James after their last conversation left a stone in Cordelia’s stomach, but perhaps it was for the best if she were to be staying in London while they both mended. If any one in the room knew of what transpired between James and Cordelia that last night, they weren’t letting on. Rubbing at the wound on her ribs, she searched the faces around her and found only concern and sympathy looking on at her. A wood pigeon, always the cello in the orchestra of birdsong, gave out its low double coo from the open window, like a beat from a large drum, which began to vibrate in her chest, and she thought it would have been very pleasant just to have remained asleep.

(Author’s Notes: Hello again everyone! I’m back. I hope you all are doing well. It’s been truly a strange couple of weeks dealing with the aftermath of the death of my beautiful niece (God, that will never get easier to say or write), but we are mending as a family and working towards moving forward through the grief. I’ve been able to spend a lot of time with my sister and my nephew, just trying to keep them busy, but the past few weeks have settled down a little bit allowing me a chance to write and get back into a few projects that I have in the works. Thank you all for the kind words, and well-wishes, and your patience. I’m really excited to be back writing and posting again. I hope you enjoyed this installment. If you did please reblog so others can enjoy it too, please give it a like, hit me with a lovely comment, and follow along with me. Next installment is coming Sunday 9/6.)

#the shadowhunter chronicles #chain of gold #The Last Night #jordelia fanfiction #james herondale #Cordelia Carstairs #Matthew Fairchild #lucie herondale #christopher lightwood #thomas lightwood #grace blackthorn #jesse blackthorn #will herondale #jem carstairs #tessa gray #the last hours #fanfiction

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asterkiss · 3 years

Text

Claimed Pt IX, X and XI

Summary: An attempt to make a deal with a certain demon doesn’t go as Mabel planned. “Sorry kid but regardless of the pitch you’re selling me, your soul’s already claimed.“ Wait, what?

Read from beginning here. Also being compiled on AO3 here.

Really trying to finish this off so have multiple parts.

- CLAIMED Pt. IX

Seducing a fairy king wasn’t as easy as it may appear on paper.

Mabel may be a renown flirt queen when it came to guys in her own dimension, but the Erlking wasn’t exactly on the same standing as the cute boys in hoodies and sweatpants. His beauty was an unnatural scale where the very air around his seemed to bend to his will so as not to put a single hair out of place.

Mabel had the feeling he wouldn’t simply bow down to her from a stupid pick-up line as was her normal routine. (No matter how good the pick-up line may be).

It was everything she could do in her power to not be seduced by his inhumane charm and beauty, how on earth was she meant to turn it the other way around so she could rob him?

That said, the Erlking often invited her out on short “dates” where it was just the two of them alone.

Each time he would ask:

‘Will you break your deal with that demon?’

And each time she would reply:

‘No.’

She could tell it frustrated him even if he tried to hide it beneath his handsome features.

‘You are a stubborn one, Schatz,’ he sighed, turning to peer out across the lake with emerald eyes.

‘You don’t know the half of it.’

He had invited her out that morning for a walk, and Mabel had taken the opportunity of requesting it be by the lake so she could scope her so called “exit” out, at least according to Bill. It was large with pristine clear water and an abundance of colourful, glowing plants beneath its surface. And apparently at its centre deep beneath the surface lay a gate in waiting.

Mabel would get to it no matter what.

She just needed to get this guy away from his staff for five minutes but no dice, he acted like the thing was attached to him.

‘So, what exactly was the deal I made with you?’ Mable asked, peering up at him as she tried to consider the best way to steal from this guy.

‘You and I promised ourselves to one another.’

If Mabel had been drinking she would have promptly spat it out at this moment. ‘R-Really? Wow, I, uh… I would have thought I’d remember that!’

He gave a small chuckle as he turned towards her, raising a hand to push a stray lock of hair behind her ear. ‘You were young, but a promise is a promise.’

Mabel could feel her cheeks becoming somewhat flushed at the intimate gesture. She’d agreed to marry a guy when she was a kid? That… definitely sounded like something she would do. Hell, she’d probably made similar promises with whatever cute boys agreed to it. She just never expected one to actually come and see it through let alone for him to be a fairy.

The hand on her ear traced a path line down her jawline and she shivered at his icy touch. No, bad Mable, stay focused. ‘So, you’re saying we’re like, engaged?’

‘Indeed.’

Oh God. She swallowed thickly, heartbeat pounding in her ears. ‘A-And my deal with Bill is stopping that?’

The king’s expression darkened at the mention of the demon. ‘My dear, you are beautiful.’

‘Oh, ah, thank you.’ Random change in topic but she was flattered none the less.

‘The promise we swore upon one another was important enough to be ingrained within your delicate soul. It was proof to others that you were not to be touched. And yet…’ His face twisted, beautiful features transforming into something unpleasant. ‘To allow a demon to stake claim on your soul is to allow him to mar your very innocence. I cannot carry out my promise and welcome you into my kingdom when your soul is blemished by his very touch. To allow entry of such an ugly and vile mistake would stain my very ruling upon mu kingdom.’

Mabel wasn’t sure what to say, she could only stare in surprise as he spat his words out venomously. He seemed like an entirely different person.

Noticing her expression, the fae quickly amended his face and smiled serenely at her. ‘I do not blame you of course, he is the one filled with deceit and manipulation. However, as I have said, he will happily agree to you rescinding the deal.’

‘Which would mean… we’d be able to get married?’

‘Indeed.’

‘And I could never go back to my family.’

‘You cannot leave this realm, no.’ He grinned. ‘But do not worry, we will become your new family. You will breed several beautiful offspring for us―’

She blanched.

‘―and our lineage will be strong and capable.’

‘O-Oh yeah?’ Mabel faltered over her words in surprise. Wow, this guy was already talking about kids? Talk about forward. Also, the way he said “us” was slightly unnerving. He meant that as in the two of them, not like him plus other fae here? Right?

She found herself unable to voice that question, somewhat terrified of the answer it might procure. Instead, she asked: ‘Why me?’

He took a step forward, leaning over her with a piercing gaze as he cupped her face in his cool hands. Despite the uneasy feeling in her stomach heat still rose to her cheeks.

‘I chose you for it was you who rescued me from peril many years ago.’

She stared in wonder, lips parting. She had?

‘You are my saviour, my Schatz.’

- CLAIMED Pt. X

‘Oh yeah, the fae sometimes snatch up creatures from other dimensions to breed with. I don’t know the details but something to do about strengthening their progeny and race.’

Mable peered out across the tree-tops from her window for a moment, watching the sun setting in a splash of colour. Eventually, she turned her attention to Bill currently laid across her bed looking like he owned it, arms folded beneath his head.

‘I guess humans have something they want to add to the fae mix.’

‘What would they want from me? Or, I mean, humans?’ It wasn’t like humans had special powers or anything fancy like that.

Bill shrugged. ‘Beats me. They bred with a Eldanechk ten thousand years ago which gave them the ability to see in the dark but also made them vulnerable to iron.’

She frowned. So any human would have satisfied the fae, she just so happened to be picked because she apparently saved the Erlking? With a sigh she pushed herself away from the window and approached the bed, taking a seat on the edge. It was odd to be sitting so closely with the demon in such a casual manner but her mind was more attuned to other dangers outside of this bedroom right now.

‘I really wish I could remember meeting the king when I was younger but I just don’t.’ She’d tried and tired to no avail.

‘Probably because he didn’t look like that.’

She perked up at that. ‘What do you mean?’

Bill pushed himself into a sitting position, meeting her gaze. ‘Most fae folk can’t exist in their true form when they travel to another dimension, certainly not for long anyways.

Most creatures have limitations when visiting worlds they’re not native to.’

‘You mean like how you’re unable to use your powers here?’

The demon’s expression soured at that. ‘Yeah.’ A pause. ‘But hey, I can use my powers in most dimensions! It ain’t my fault that like eight of them can’t handle me at my full strength!’

Mable snorted as he tried to defend himself which only made his scowl harden. As she stood up to walk away he yelled after her, even going so far as to grab her hairbrush. He was mid-way in the process of throwing it before his shock collar activated.

‘Gyckh-! S-Stupid fairies!’

- CLAIMED Pt. XI

Mable wasn’t entirely sure how but one day she somehow found herself taking a walk with none other than Bill Cipher for company.

The demon had been getting a bad case of cabin fever after being holed up in their accommodation but unfortunately wasn’t permitted to leave without “supervision”. Every time he tried to leave the place he got shocked.

It turned out however that because he was her “pet” the fae would allow him outside if he was tagging along with her.

There was just one condition.

‘Hey, stop pulling,’ Mabel scolded, yanking on the lead. Bill let out a short choke as he was tugged back, stumbling a step before he turned to glare at her.

If looks could kill.

But hey, it wasn’t Mabel who had attached a leash to his shock collar! (Though, admittedly, she was enjoying the whole situation).

‘When I get my powers back I will end you.’

‘If you get them back, you mean.’

He released a cruel laugh as they continued walking along. ‘I will! You’ll be swayed by that fae’s looks one of these days. Everyone knows you’re not the smart twin.’

Her lips turned at that remark and she gave the leash another yank.

‘I had enough brain to outsmart you,’ she retorted.

He didn’t have a witty comeback to that.

The pair continued walking through the woodlands that made up the fae kingdom and surrounded its small city. They had been advised that a perimeter surrounding the area was enforced by a magical barrier and therefore escape was impossible. It was the only reason they had been allowed to scamper off unsupervised by anybody else, the fae were that confident they had them trapped.

Even so, Bill wished to go check it out which was the reason for their outing this morning.

It was obvious when they did eventually come across it. Upon crossing a river, Mabel noticed that the air up ahead seemed to take on a shimmer and the air hummed with magic. The nearer they approached it, the warmer their surroundings seemed to get.

Bill stood up against the barrier and studied it with a sharp eye whilst she took it in with wonder.

She noticed a rabbit on the other side of the barrier and watched it curiously. It came up towards the barrier before abruptly turning and going in the other direction.

Huh.

Mable looked around and picked up a broken branch, after a moment of consideration she threw it.

It sailed past the barrier without incident.

Bill watched her actions with curiosity before turning to search for something on the ground. A moment later, he also picked something up.

‘What is that?’

‘A beetle. Want to taste it?’

Mable made a face. ‘Ew, no, that’s gross.’

Bill shrugged. ‘Your loss then.’ He threw the bug at the barrier.

There was a shock of electricity when it made contact, and both Mable and Bill jumped at the eruption of sizzling that permeated the air.

When all done and gone, there sat a fried and crispy bug on the floor.

‘...Huh. So my theory was correct, it doesn’t let things through that are alive.’

Mable gave him a pointed look. ‘Did you really have to fry a beetle alive to confirm that?’

‘Would you rather I use you as a test subject instead?’ he asked, arching an eyebrow.

Before she could respond, a pair of distant voices reached their ears. But they were getting closer.

Two humanoid shapes came into view in the distance, and before Mable could do anything Bill yanked her aside and pulled the both of them out of sight behind a tree. The demon slapped his hand over her mouth and she would have protested had the voices not come into focus.

‘...wonder how much longer we have to wait.’

They peered around through the thick foliage to see two fae dressed in clothing that gave a sentiel appearence.

Guards.

The shorter of the pair shrugged casually. ‘Not long. Have you seen how the human acts around our King? She’s one step away from giving in. I heard humans like to play hard to get when they’re courting, that’s all she’s doing.’

‘Hm. What about her pet though?’

‘The demon? I heard that once the human breaks off their deal, the King’s going to hand him over to the scientists for experiments.’

‘Hah! Serves him right for messing with one of our claims.’

Their laughter faded until they were completely gone, and Mabel and Bill were left alone.

Bill remained still, his hand covering her mouth. Unlike the Erlking’s cold touch, the demon actually felt warm. It was weird, when they’d made their deal his flames had felt like ice shooting through her veins but in this form he felt, well, human.

She didn’t like it.

‘Urgh! Did you just lick me!?’

Mabel took the opportunity of his surprise to jerk away from him, turning to meet his annoyed glare.

‘Are you okay?’

He faltered. ‘H-Huh?’

‘What those two fae were saying...’ She trailed off.

‘Those imbeciles? Like I’d be bothered by their idiocy! Have you forgotten who I am, Shooting Star? It won’t be so easy for drivel like them to get the best of me.’

For somebody who claimed to be such a good liar and manipulator he was doing a bad job right now of hiding his real emotions. Perhaps because he was in this body?

It made him appear even more human, to the point one could almost forget he was actually a demonic triangle hell-bent on destroying her family and world.

So she needed him to act like his usual self.

‘Wha- hey, did you just pinch me!? You little brat-!’

‘Jeez, will you give it a rest and just face the facts. Regardless of what you or those guys think, I’m not going to give in,’ she insisted, face set in firm determination. ‘And you have every reason to be on my side now. So let’s work together and escape this place, alright?’

Bill regarded her warily, they were enemies. But right now they had tougher fish to fry. Or they were both done for.

He clicked his tongue in defeat, obvious distaste covering his face. ‘...Fine. But once we’re out of here, I don’t owe you anything anymore, got it? That’s my condition.'

Her face fell at that. Mable thought back to her original reason for tricking Bill to begin with. Their whole original deal which had set this thing in motion.

She had to give that up?

Then again, what was the point in trying to fight for Grunkle Stan if the alternative was being stuck here unable to see him ever again anyways.

Her shoulders slumped in defeat and she eventually gave a small nod.

‘Got it.’

#claimed #mabill #mabel and bill actually decide to work together #and are getting slightly closer #also this thing is gonna be like 20 parts so half-way there #why is it everytime i try to do something short and small it goes way too long #(i know why. i like plot too much)#ff update

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zintranslations · 3 years

Text

Kaleidoscope of Death, Extra 7

Kaleidoscope of Death by Xi Zixu Link to Chinese / Novel Updates

Extra: Bai Ming and Zhang Yiqing

After Bai Ming and Zhang Yiqing met, Zhang Yiqing once asked Bai Ming a question. He asked him: "What are your dreams?"

When he heard this question Bai Ming immediately beamed. He met Zhang Yiqing’s eyes and answered earnestly and solemnly, "my dream is you."

At this, Zhang Yiqing was momentarily taken aback.

"I'm seriously asking."

Bai Ming, "and I'm seriously answering."

Bai Ming indeed was serious. Before encountering the doors, he'd already been a fan of Zhang Yiqing, obsessively devoted to that handsome man onscreen.

Bai Ming collected Zhang Yiqing's every movie, every drama, and every commercial. And when he found out that Zhang Yiqing was quitting the silver screen to direct behind-the-scenes instead, Bai Ming went crazy for a good long while.

During that while, nobody in their organization dared to go through doors with him. They all knew Bai Ming was the sort of person capable of doing anything on a bad mood.

Back then, Bai Ming had not yet been the boss of their organization. He had just been a plain and simple door-crosser, though the potential he emanated often gave his fellow door-crossers the sense that he was no small-pond creature.

Bai Ming's family situation was more complicated. He'd lived at an orphanage since youth, and had only been found and brought back home after he turned twelve. Only then did he learn that his father was actually a rich man, and the reason his father brought him back had nothing to do with paternal devotion, but rather because his brother needed a healthy liver.

This sort of bloody melodrama was what befell Bai Ming.

The truth was, prior to actually meeting Zhang Yiqing, the two of them had seen each other once before.

It was at a cocktail party hosted by the Bai family. Bai Ming had stood in a corner, small and thin, and watched as a smiling Zhang Yiqing chatted with his father. Zhang Yiqing had been young back then, and had just recently snagged Best Actor—there was still a touch of youth in his appearance, but the unparalleled splendor of his later years could already be seen.

Bai Ming had stared at him for a long time, many thoughts flashing through his mind. At this point he was already a fan of Zhang Yiqing's movies, but was too nervous to just walk up and start talking to him. He could only gaze from afar.

And later, Bai Ming met the doors, so he'd thought that there was only ever to be the one encounter between he and Zhang Yiqing.

But fate was always an extraordinary thing. After many years of hard work, Bai Ming had staked out quite a position for himself in the world of the doors. One day, a good friend suddenly asked him: "Bai Ming, you like Zhang Yiqing, right?"

Lit cigarette hanging between his lips, Bai Ming vocalized a lazy, "mh."

"He's started entering doors too," his friend told him. "Want to consider taking him on?"

Bai Ming's head twisted to stare at his friend.

"What did you say?"

Looking innocently back at him, his friend repeated himself.

Bai Ming extinguished the cigarette and laughed, "this isn't a joke, is it?"

Of course it wasn't a joke. The moment he saw Zhang Yiqing again, Bai Ming knew that his dream was about to come true.

Zhang Yiqing, who had retreated behind the scenes, was no longer as tender as he'd been in his youth. He was no less handsome, however. Like an aged bottle of wine, he and his charms had not faded with time, in fact had begun to emanate a unique fragrance of maturity.

All competent people have arrogance, and Zhang Yiqing was a proud standout in his industry. He'd taken the laurels for Best Actor four times, not to mention countless other awards, both large and small. The year he turned to directing, the country had even nominated him for Best Director.

The only shame was that after encountering the doors, his fate was forced to take a sharp turn.

"Hello, I'm Bai Ming." The two sat face-to-face, and Bai Ming held a hand out to Zhang Yiqing with a smile. His smile was sincere, and paired with that harmless-looking face, there really was no visible aura of an apex predator about him. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

Naturally, Zhang Yiqing was fooled by Bai Ming. He took Bai Ming's hand and said, "it's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Zhang Yiqing."

"Oh," Bai Ming nodded. "I've seen your movies."

Zhang Yiqing smiled politely. He likely thought Bai Ming was just a normal fan, or perhaps not even that—Bai Ming may just be an audience who had seen his movies in passing. But much later, when Zhang Yiqing saw that room stacked full of his own works, he would finally realize that Bai Ming was nowhere as harmless as he made himself look.

Of course, at this point, Zhang Yiqing was not aware of anything. He saw the headful of natural curls, the unsophisticated grin, and really took Bai Ming for a gentle-natured young man…

At this point Zhang Yiqing even failed to understand why everybody in Bai Ming's organization was so scared of him, to the point where Zhang Yiqing thought there really must be a misunderstanding…

Inside and outside the doors, Bai Ming did not change much. His personality stayed genial. When confronted with malicious words or even malicious people, he was never even vicious in return.

Sometimes, Zhang Yiqing even thought Bai Ming was being too nice, and would step up to protect Bai Ming.

"You're too well-tempered," was something Zhang Yiqing once said. "Nice people get taken advantage of. Harbor no intent to hurt, but preserve all instinct to caution!"[1]

Bai Ming listened to Zhang Yiqing's reprimand and said, beaming, "Zhang-ge's right to scold me."

Zhang Yiqing didn’t know what went through his head then, but seeing Bai Ming's well-behaved smile, he reached out and gave that head a pat. Only after touching Bai Ming did he realize the gesture didn't seem quite right, and so he coughed once, before explaining, "it just looks good to touch."

Bai Ming just blinked his eyes noncommittally.

Bai Ming's hair was extremely fluffy and truly peak touch quality. Just seeing it made people want to pet it. But there really weren't that many people who’d dare to pet a tiger—Zhang Yiqing was one of few, though at that time, he had yet to discover the fact that Bai Ming was a ferocious beast, and not some adorable kitten.

But fake was fake in the end—Zhang Yiqing was no idiot either. By the time he became aware of the incongruities about Bai Ming's person, the two of them had already grown closer.

Zhang Yiqing had noticed the oddity and even joked about it, saying, "Bai Ming, how come I've discovered that anyone who crosses you gets struck with misfortune?"

Bai Ming batted his eyes at this.

"Don't they deserve it?"

At his smile, Zhang Yiqing froze. Zhang Yiqing had only been joking, but after careful thought, a layer of cold sweat began to dot his back. Because as far as he could remember, ever since he and Bai Ming started entering doors together, those who had wronged Bai Ming were not simply "unfortunate," they were all…dead.

That's right, dead. Dead via various odd accidents. Some things may seem accidental on the surface, but—upon multiple occurrences—could no longer be mere coincidence.

Incidental became inescapable after a certain point.

Having realized something, Zhang Yiqing looked once more to Bai Ming, and found that the young man who was once so easy to read now seemed something of a stranger.

The good thing was, that feeling only lasted for a moment, because Bai Ming grinned and scooted closer again.

"Zhang-ge, come get hotpot with me tonight?"

"Sure," Zhang Yiqing agreed.

The relationship between the two of them was still ambiguous at this moment, but one could die at any time inside the doors. Zhang Yiqing saw clearly Bai Ming's devotion to protecting him, and so the two got closer and closer—until one day, when Zhang Yiqing went to a party.

As a heavy hitter in the entertainment industry, there were naturally many people lined up to take a ride on his coattails. That was why that day, a coworker introduced him to a beautiful young woman.

Though Zhang Yiqing rejected her immediately, Bai Ming, who'd come along for fun, still saw everything.

Oddly enough, against Bai Ming's gaze, Zhang Yiqing felt a sense of guilt. The party hadn’t even been over when Bai Ming pulled Zhang Yiqing alone into a break room. Zhang Yiqing wanted to resist at first, but discovered that he wasn't at all Bai Ming's opponent—he was picked up and brought along as if he were a sack of rice.

"Does Zhang-ge have someone he likes?" was what Bai Ming asked him.

Zhang Yiqing said, "no."

"No?" Bai Ming said. "Then what's the deal with her?"

Watching Bai Ming's expression, Zhang Yiqing had the thought that the person before him seemed a bit drunk. He licked his lips, and spoke hoarsely: "I don't like her."

"You don't like her, but you'll still have her?" Bai Ming asked.

Zhang Yiqing opened his mouth, wanting to explain. But when the words got to his lips, the pride in his bones was for some reason set off by Bai Ming's accusatory tone. He lifted his chin and, with a cool expression, forced down the anxiety deep in his chest.

"So what if I will?"

Bai Ming pressed a hand to his lips, got closer, and hummed, "but I'll get angry."

Zhang Yiqing's brow furrowed.

Bai Ming, "I'll get very…very…angry."

Zhang Yiqing was just about to ask and so what if you get angry when Bai Ming shoved him onto the break room sofa. Bai Ming's fingers picked apart the first button on his shirt, and the man looked down at Zhang Yiqing from high above. His voice when he spoke was colder than anything Zhang Yiqing had heard from him.

"I don't want to wait anymore."

Zhang Yiqing's eyes went wide. This was the first time he became aware that Bai Ming and that harmless youth he thought he knew were two completely different people.

"Zhang-ge," Bai Ming said. "I like you. Do you like me?"

Zhang Yiqing swallowed, and he didn't answer Bai Ming's question. He only said, "calm down a second…"

Bai Ming watched him. "You also like me, right? You just don't want to admit it…But even if you don't admit it, that’s alright." He smiled, as handsome as an incubus. "It's fine as long as I like you."

Everything that happened after that was unspeakable.

By the time Zhang Yiqing once again regained consciousness, he was limp all over. Bai Ming had him wrapped up in blanket and was placing him into the car. Seeing him wake, Zhang Yiqing beamed.

"Zhang-ge, you're up? We're headed home now."

Zhang Yiqing wanted to speak, but found his voice nearly gone. He recalled something, and a smudge of red appeared over his cheeks as he grated out: "Animal."

Bai Ming batted his eyes. "Zhang-ge, are you calling me big?"

Zhang Yiqing, "…" He surrendered.

Bai Ming, "no worries, it's only 3AM. There's still plenty of time when we get back."

Zhang Yiqing wanted to retort, so Bai Ming caught him by the lips. Bai Ming's kiss was rough enough to turn his mouth an evocative red.

Zhang Yiqing went dizzy with the kiss. It was only then that he had the faint realization that he…seemed to have caught the attention of someone incredible.

Translator’s Notes:

害人之心不可有，防人之心不可無; idiom that literally means, “you can’t have intent to hurt people, but you can’t not be guarded against people.” The two phrases have parallel rhythms Chinese (note the four middle characters are identical), so coming up with a translation that mirrors that to some degree is both fun and difficult.

[Extra: Twin Lives, Twin Deaths(3)] | [Extra: Tan Zaozao]

#kaleidoscope of death #xi zixu #cnovel #chinese translation #死亡萬花筒 #ugh sorry i got so fucking busy #disregard the tags on my last post TTT #tzz coming next chapter #we'll end as god (xzx) intended #i'm sooooo intrigued by BM and LQS's friendship

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harristops · 3 years

Note

I disagree so much with your take on Ella's tweet. If Ash has had a bad seaseon right from CC and she made that tweet, I can consider understanding. But Ash has been great since the CC. But based on a single game that Erin has played, you agree that Erin should be starting over Ash?? That seems unfair. The entire sample size since she's been back from injury is this one game. Haracic carried Gotham on her back all through the challenge cup. The moment Sheridan was fit again, she started over her. Not a single person has even suggested they split time in the net but Ella's tweet basically implying that Ash only starts because of politics is acceptable?? It's f*cking terrible tbh. It's so commonplace to give Ash a back hand comment that folks do it without blinking. Even on her best day, folks will say yes but... And it's not f*cking fair

So I thought I answered this but I guess it either got lost or something lol. Anyways - first of all, please calm down. Second, I do not agree with the context in which Ella framed her tweet, rather the objective point that if your keeper wins on the road and does superbly well, they shouldn't be automatically ruled out for playing the next game. I don't agree about the part about politics, nor do I agree with her rudeness and passive aggressive shading of Ash.

Erin is a phenomenal keeper and played extraordinarily well. She knew that she was gonna be the back up on the Pride but she played the NCC game like she was part of the regular starting XI. That's what you want to see: a GK you can trust to carry and manage the load so the other GK can rest.

I love Ash to death and I will always support her, but the point underneath the blatant disrespect of Ella's tweet isn't unfounded. You play what works for the team and what gets you to win. If anything, tonight proved that either Erin or Ash in goal is a safe choice which is what we all want. Ash is the captain of this team and now that she's no longer gonna be away on international duties, she'll be here for the full 24 game season where she will likely be pitted against the most competitive and challenging teams while Erin takes on the others to share the load.

Maybe I came across the wrong way but the point is this: I don't think Ella framed her point the right way and I do think she intended to be passive aggressive (for reasons unknown to me because she and Erin are long divorced lol), but I think that it shouldn't be unjustified to consider the hot - handed keeper to play the next match. Erin gave Orlando their first and arguably biggest win of the season on the road. She was fired up, the team was fired up, and no doubt that same energy would have carried into today's game if she had been starting. Would she have performed as well as Ash? I don't know. But keep in mind, Erin has lots of international experience and is a world class goalkeeper who is strong in net. If she had started, I'm sure she'd have done well.

Again, I love Ash and she played well tonight. She's someone who deserves all the good things in the world and is the heart and soul of the team, which I bet Erin respects. I don't think it's politics or favoritism that she started instead of Erin, but because she was rested and ready to take on the full strength of Portland's offense. She also proved herself in the CC that she could take on these teams with grace and strength. I'm just saying, it isn't entirely unreasonable to have considered giving Erin a second start with the performance she gave at the NCC game.

You're welcome to disagree, but please don't come at me like I'm talking down on Ash or shitting on her performances because that was not my intent. I don't support how Ella said what she said, just that the underlying idea wasn't completely unjustified. Ashlyn Harris fans are great but sometimes they struggle to be objective because they worship the ground she walks on. I'm not disrespecting her or discounting her performance, I'm just stating my thoughts. I apologize if anything I said offended you, as again, this was not at all my intent! :)

#Asks #anyways I hope this answers the second ask I got about this because I am not writing this out again lol #AH stans please don't hate me you're allowed to have thoughts and opinions just as I am #But just don't be rude - if you have a point tell me calmly and without being spicy lmao #This is a place for open debate and I welcome dissent but in a calm cool collected way lol

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trillian-anders · 4 years

Text

chambers - xi

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

warnings: violence, angst, slow burn

word count: 3610

description: post-endgame. Steve Rogers has passed away from old age. The one remarkable thing is that no one knew his heart would be in the condition it was. He was able to save one more life. After receiving his heart, strange things start happening. Including something that would change your life forever. (Inspired by the Netflix series of the same name.)

note: this is where things actually start happening. enjoy the rest of your week loves.

“So what’s the plan?” You ask, sitting around the conference table. This was a full group gathering. The man in charge of training the recruits was even standing in the back of the room. A man you’d never seen before, but Bucky explained,

“We’ll probably be using everyone for this.”

Wanda sat to your left, half facing you. Sam stood at the front.

“Zemo is currently operating out of somewhere in New York,” Sam stated, he looked at the hologram of King T’Challa sitting to his right. “Have you found anything about the men in Tanzania?”

“We’ve recovered a cache of old weaponry, guns left over from the forties in their possession.” The weapons powered by the tesseract.

“But the tesseract doesn’t exist anymore.” Wanda interjected. “So they can’t have tesseract power if it doesn’t exist?”

“They contain fractions of power, just as you still do.” King T’Challa goes on, “But that’s not going to say they aren’t going to use these weapons for prototypes for a different power source.”

“Or if they already have.” Sam agreed. “We need to get back out on the streets.” Clint sat back in his chair, the archer eating pretzels.

“If he’s in a warehouse somewhere it’s fair to say, according to every comic I’ve ever read, that we should start at the docks.” Bucky rolled his eyes, spinning around in his chair to glare at him. Clint smirked and crunched down on another pretzel. Bucky looked at you, Wanda whispering into your ear about her earlier idea.

“Absolutely not.” Bucky said, “You’re not doing that.” Wanda glared at him.

“Doing what?” Sam asked. Bucky gave him a look.

“Using her as bait.”

“I don’t think,” You started, “That Zemo thinks I will take his offer, I think he knows I wouldn’t.” The group looked at you. “So I don’t think pretending to take the money would be the best approach, but if we find him, then maybe I could try to confront him and find out what his plan is.” You shrug, you look at Clint, “According to every comic I’ve ever read the bad guy always likes a monologue right?” He laughed throwing a pretzel across the table at you.

“You’re not an agent.” Sam said sternly. Protectively. “You’re not an Avenger.” You sigh,

“No, I know.” You put your hands up in defense. “I’m not saying I’ll go in and fight him or take him down or anything. I’m just saying…”

“We aren’t putting you in a position where he could take you.” Bucky stated sternly, “That’s final.” Sam looked at you oddly, eyes going soft for a moment.

“Bucky will train you to handle yourself if the moment arises.” Sam said, “I know he’s teaching you some self defense, but…” His eyes met Bucky’s steady glare. “I think you can handle him training you like a recruit, just in case.” Bucky opened his mouth to speak.

“Just in case, Buck.” You spoke soothingly. His eyes met yours across the table. Just in case. Sam nods,

“So here’s what we’re going to do…”

Sam and Bruce were weirding you out. Whenever you’d walked into a room they would immediately stop talking. If it wasn’t for the fact that Bruce was usually quiet during your testing you’d think that was strange, but what was strange about it was that he was suddenly fine with pushing you a little harder than you’ve pushed before.

“Your body is adapting,” Peter said astounded after watching you run 45 miles an hour, “It’s incredible.” Your body…

...is adapting.

This watered down serum that you’ve had pumping through you for almost three years seems to thrive under the new routine.

“If we are going to train,” Bucky stood above your bed like a jackass holding a flashlight in your face, “Then we are going to train.” It was 4 AM. He ripped your covers off and you groaned covering your face. “C’mon, get up.” He seemed peeved about it. As though him doing this would make you say ‘oh nevermind, I would rather sleep in.’ A sweatshirt was thrown at you soon after and you were slipping your sneakers on a minute after that, grumbling as you followed him outside for the warm up.

Peter made these little clear fingertip sized electrodes to attach to yourself before a workout. They would wirelessly record data that would then cycle into your file for them to look at later on in the day.

“I don’t think it’s fair that Peter gets to sleep in and just be like that.” Like super strong and able to lift a truck over his head. You panted as you’d topped out at fifty miles an hour for the first time since shredding your legs. The muscles had become more defined, stronger.

“When Steve got the serum it immediately gave him the muscle mass he needed to use the power he was given,” Bruce explained, “You didn’t have that muscle.”

But you were getting it.

You were sweating while Bucky stood above you, watching you press fifty, then seventy, then a hundred pounds. You’d begun squatting with just the bar, your legs and core now being able to add a hundred pounds to that as well.

You’d punched Bucky in the jaw yesterday. It had been morifying. His head whipping to the side, a dribble of blood on his lip while you covered your mouth and saying “I’m so sorry.” Over and over again until he gave you what must have been the sexiest look you’d ever seen in your life and saying,

“Good, do it again.”

Eric was very apologetic for not catching you, “It just happened so fast, I just didn’t—” You shook your head, holding up a hand to stop him.

“It’s okay,” You laughed, “Really, it happens very quickly.” You still didn’t know what you wanted to do about this. Eric was a great guy, he was kind, he seemed to really care about you. He was a great kisser, but it just didn’t feel the way you thought it would.

It didn’t feel the way…

You looked over at Bucky who was pointedly not looking at you. You sighed, rolling your shoulders back and tuning back into Eric’s story about what happened that day at training. “We should have dinner again,” His fingers brushing down your arm. A chill went down your spine and not a good one. Maybe this is when you can tell him that maybe now isn’t a good time. Dinner.

“Tonight?” You stepped to the side to let another recruit pass you, luckily taking you out of range for his soft touch. He nods,

“Sounds good.” The group behind him calls his name, bringing his attention away from you. “I’ll see you later.” A soft peck to your lips and he was gone. You let out a heavy sigh and placed your face in your hands. You’ll tell him tonight.

“What do you want?” You asked the figure standing in the middle of your room. “Why are you here?”

Steve’s eyes followed you as you walked into the bathroom, turning the sink on to wash your face. His figure appeared in the reflection of the mirror behind you. His eyes were soft. Hands in his pockets.

“If you’re going to throw me into a memory at least let me lay down.” His eyes moved from yours, turning to look at the bed, then back at you. You sighed, drying your skin before walking by him, your shoulder phasing through his chest. “I don’t understand.” You lay on the bed, “What these memories are supposed to be showing me. Or why any of this is even happening.” His figure loomed above you before his hand came up to gently cup your cheek, his blue eyes soft, caring even. Apologetic.

A moment,

Then another,

You felt your eyes roll back in your head and then you were gone.

How do you start over? How does it happen?

People blipped back right where they’d disappeared. Patrons in their seats, servers mid step towards tables. There were car crashes, fires, and some people fell from the sky. It was a horror show. Almost as hard as people disappearing in the first place. Families were torn apart. Divorced. Kids lost would reappear to a broken home, their parents not being able to cope with their loss and separated. Some had siblings born during the blip that were now older than them.

There was a rush for jobs. For work. Files lost or discarded. Apartments and homes boarded up or sold to someone else.

The reversal of the blip. The loss of Tony Stark. It was felt. Everywhere. Murals started popping up. Tony Stark, Natasha Romanov. The world was at a loss.

But you had been one of the lucky ones.

It had always just been you and your parents and the three of you survived the blip. You all lived those five years with no extended family. You’d lost a couple of coworkers, but the sickness you had kept you from keeping many friends anyway.

Life went on.

It was quiet. A couple weeks after the blip. A slow night at the bar. You’d been focused on sneaking some chips and guac behind the service bar where guests couldn’t see you. The four men watching whatever semi-pro sports event was going on that night. They were wearing one of the teams gear. A couple that was talking about the people they worked with, the woman speaking about the job she’d been promoted into and how it was up in the air now because the man that had the job before her had come back.

A man walked in. An old man in face only. He walked steadily. Didn’t hunch. He was fairly tall. He smiled at you as he approached the bar, scooting the stool out and plopping down, casting his eyes to the television screen above him that was mutely playing the news.

“Hi,” You smiled, grabbing the beer list and a food menu from behind you, “How are you tonight?”

The old man smiled softly, “I’m doing well, how are you?” His eyes drifted to the raised scar poking out of your shirt. An old one. For a heart that you were on borrowed time with.

“I’m alright,” You lay your arms on the bar after placing a coaster down, “Would you like a beer?” It was a brewery after all. The man nodded, looking down the list before picking your seasonal pilsner. “Did you want to order some dinner as well?”

“Maybe in a minute.” He took a sip of his beer before placing it down on the coaster, gesturing up towards the tv screen. The Avengers compound, or what was left of it anyway. “What a mess that is.” You turned to look. They were going to start rebuilding soon, but hadn’t quite started yet. You could see cranes in the background.

“Yeah,” You breathed, “I couldn’t imagine.” You shook your head.

“Being an Avenger?” He asked, taking another sip of his beer. You laughed,

“Yeah, definitely couldn’t imagine that.” You were called to the end of the bar, the guys wanted another round.

“I heard that Captain America retired.” The old man said, the menu now laying open in front of him.

“Huh…” You looked back on the screen where the news reporter was talking. A picture of Tony Stark and Natasha Romanov behind her. “I don’t blame him.”

“No?” The old man flipped a page in the menu.

“That job is probably very taxing.” You explain, “Especially after a fight like that. I’m sure he was close with his teammates.” You leaned on the bartop towards him. “It must be hard losing people you’re that close to.”

“You’ve never lost anyone close to you?” He asked, flipping another page.

“No, it’s just me and my parents.” You shrug, “We all survived the blip…. And I’ve never had any other family so…” He nods, eyes growing soft for a moment before saying,

“You look just like your Mother.” You gave him a strange look.

“You know my Mother?” He shook his head,

“No, I mean you probably look just like your Mother, I’m sorry.” He laughed, “It’s this old brain of mine, the words don’t come out the way I intend them to sometimes. Can I get a cheeseburger?” The old man sat at your bar long after the other patrons left. Closing time is still a little too far away for your liking.

“You can ask about it,” You joked. He had looked at your scar four times now. “It’s okay.” He cleared his throat,

“Have you had any luck?” He asked. You shook your head.

“I’ve had two different hearts now, this one I’m sure I’m on borrowed time with.” You wrung out a towel, wiping down the bar where the couple had just left. “Whatever is supposed to happen will, I guess.”

“Have you always had medical problems?” He asked, wiping the corner of his mouth with a napkin. You nodded, sticking the glasses in the dishwasher.

“They thought I wasn’t going to survive childhood,” You said, “I was always sick as a kid, not even just with the heart problems, even though that was their main concern.” You came to rest your arms on the bar in front of him again, sitting on the ledge behind the bar. “I couldn’t tell you how many times I had pneumonia.”

“Sounds like you lost the genetic lottery.” He jibed. You grinned, laughing.

“Yeah, sounds like it.” You didn’t know why you were so comfortable with this man. He seemed so familiar. There was something about him that made you just feel so safe. On his left hand shined a gold wedding ring.

“I’m sure it’ll work out.” He says, “And then maybe you could get out of this bar, doing something incredible.” You shake your head, scrunching your nose.

“I'm probably going to die in this bar.” He chuckled,

“What did you want to do?” He popped a fry into his mouth, “When you were a kid, before you realized that without a new heart you wouldn’t be able to do anything?” Your eyes met his. Blue, with a little bit of green.

“I wanted to be a superhero.” You laughed, “I think every kid wanted to.” You turned your head towards the television screen, voice trailing off as you said, “Just like Captain America….” The news of his retirement. Breaking News of his retirement. You looked back at the old man across from you, his wallet out, thick plastic covering pictures of family.

“I hope one day you’ll get everything you ever wanted kid.” He stood from the stool and grabbed your hand softly, a bundle of cash pressed between your palms, “Have the best life.” A kind smile, eyes heavily crinkled in the corners and he stepped back. Two finger salute. And he was gone. .

He showed you your own memory. Eyes blurry, regaining focus. Panting with heavy breath like you’d just resurfaced from underwater. He was still there, standing in front of you and you could almost see it.

The wrinkles by his eyes. His grey hair. The wedding band. The tan jacket.

“You knew.” You accused, legs shaky as you stood from the bed. He didn’t move. “Did you know?” His jaw clenched, unanswering as always. You stood chest to chest, staring into his eyes asking a question you never thought you would ask. You opened your mouth and closed it once, before opening it again and asking, “Did you know that you were going to give me your heart?”

…

The elevator binged before the doors opened and Bucky watched Eric stepping out into the common area. His teeth immediately grinding. The fork he’d just been stabbing broccoli with clanged heavily on the side of the plate as he dropped it, scooting the stool back as loudly as he could, taking the man’s attention away from your door and to Bucky’s hulking figure.

“What are you doing up here recruit?” Bucky knew what he was doing up here, but he needed to go. Sam was busy assigning tech and filing forms. Everyone else had gone home. You had disappeared to your room not that long ago, there was no one in between them now. No one tugging on Bucky’s leash.

“Oh,” Eric grinned sheepishly, “I was just heading over to have dinner with Y/N.” Bucky stepped towards him. Eric shifted, nervous.

“I don’t think you will.” Bucky stepped a little too close for comfort. Eric stepped back, his back pressed against the wall next to the elevators. “I think you’re gonna go back to your bunk with the rest of the recruits.” Eric’s face contorted into a glare.

“She wants me here.” He spat, “She likes me.” A beat of silence then a smirk pulled on his lips, “But you like her.” A shit eating grin, “Wow.” He scoffed, “The Winter fucking Soldier, jealous because of a stupid crush.”

“You need to mind your damn business.” Bucky spat, “And go back downstairs before I put you on suspension.”

“You don’t have that kind of power.” Eric took a step towards Bucky, the nervous facade he’d put on earlier dissolving, “Sam has that power though, doesn’t he?” Bucky’s fists clenched at his sides. “Because Rogers made him Captain… and not you.” Bucky laughed, shaking his head.

“You really think I wanted to be Captain America?” Bucky fisted his hands in Eric’s shirt, slamming him back against the wall, “You need to stay away from her, if you know what’s good for you.” Eric didn’t falter, smirk still on his face.

“I think that’s up to her.” He said, “Don’t you?” Eyes rolling, “But you’re from the forties right? Where men make the decisions and women stay in their place? So you think you can just make that decision for her?”

“Eric I think you should go,” You voice came softly from the hallway. Both men turned to look at you, Bucky’s heart dropped. You’d been crying. Your eyes shifted from Eric’s to Bucky’s. “Tonight isn’t a good night.” Bucky released him, taking a step back. Eyes still connected to yours.

“Y/N?” Eric stepped towards you, “I thought we were going to have dinner? What’s wrong?” You wrapped your arms around yourself,

“Not tonight,” You looked at him and noticed his fists were clenched, “Another time, I’m sorry.” He sucked in his teeth, nodding.

“I’ll see you tomorrow then,” His voice tense. Clearly unhappy. When the doors to the elevators closed Bucky watched your eyes turn to meet his again, watering.

“There’s something I have to tell you.” Bucky faltered for a moment, his anxiety spiking.

“Are you okay?” Your hand reached out for his, fingers brushing before interlacing. You hugged him toward the couch, sitting softly and he followed suit. You traced his fingers for a moment, sniffling. “Doll,” His metal fingers touched your chin, pulling your eyes to his, “What’s wrong?”

Your lips parted, chapped. You shook your head to clear it, “I just had another memory.” You explain, his fingers tightening around yours. You look at him with watery eyes, tears beginning to roll down your cheeks and you say, “Steve knew he was going to give me his heart, years before he did.”

You watched Bucky’s eyes widen a fraction, and his hand squeezed yours reassuringly. And then he sighed heavily, blinking hard before meeting your eyes softly, “I know.”

…

The sun was setting over New York City. Cars were bumper to bumper, jammed in the streets. Bikes bobbing and weaving in between. In the center of Manhattan, the tourist spot of Times Square was booming with activity.

Teens lounged on the red steps, people in character outfits were tricking tourists into giving them cash. A couple corners had men handing out flyers for a comedy show they were trying to fill the seats of that night. A couple other corners some guys were selling their own mix cds for $10 a pop.

Shoppers had handfuls of bags and the hundred adverts you see changed and shifted effortlessly on the LEDs. The New Years ball sat idly at the top of One Times Square, the dark numbers of 2027 sitting until they were to be changed for the New Year.

The ball suddenly began to rise.

No one noticed at first. The steady climb that usually didn’t happen but once a year.

In a security office a man who had been idly sitting sipping his third coffee of the day suddenly choked. The camera showing the roof of the building showed the ball disappearing out of sight.

People began to stop.

Stop walking. Stop driving. The teens on the steps pulled out their phones capturing the malfunction that would surely be trending later.

The ball reached the top. 2027 lit up. And then the ball began to drop again.

People began counting. Jokingly. Ready to say Happy New Year, a loud chorus shouted to be recorded and posted on every social media platform available.

Some people moved on, seemingly unbothered with their day. A group of tourists visiting from Missouri in matching t-shirts took a picture of themselves with a selfie stick.

A man was arguing with his wife, the two ignoring what was going on if only for the fact that she wanted to look at his phone and he wouldn’t let her.

A Mother picked up her child, pointing at the ball. The lights glowing in the darkened sky.

An explosion.

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