#feminine advice | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thesirencult · 9 months

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YOUR HUSBAND IS NOT AN ATM

I get it. There are countless accounts here and on every single social media platform that advocate for a dangerous type of "hypergamy". That type of a relationship will only make you feel unauthentic and unfulfilled with your life.

If the only use your partner has for you is to be a money printing machine, then you are not a high value woman but a high value heaux. There's nothing wrong with that but even "heauxs" have more talents, skills and financial freedom than some women who will put themselves into dangerous situations by submitting to a high earning man WHO IS NOT A HIGH VALUE MAN !

Being submissive to someone requires you to have some form of strength before that you "give up". You can not submit to someone lower than you.

So, build up your position ! There are great men who are providers without being multimillionaires. If you are interested in living a luxurious life then you should either a. MAKE YOUR OWN MONEY, especially at first or b. do yachting. If the b. choice is up to your standards and you have no problem being treated like a piece of meat, be my guest.

In the past women who chose men for money were weak women who came from environments that didn't allow them to flourish. They had to do everything to survive. I respect that.

What I don't respect is you, who could learn a high performance skill, sell it online and make much more in the long term than those only fans and by keeping your VALUE and SELF INTEGRITY.

Power couples are so much stronger than couples with power plays. The last is only for the bedroom 🔥.

All in all, invest in yourself internally and externally. Become a high value balanced woman and the right man for you will come along.

#hypergamyblr #hypergamous #hypergamy #level up journey #leveling up #level up #feminine advice #feminine energy #thesirencult #siren energy #seduction #48 laws of power

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thedollhousediaries · 1 year

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#dollhouse dairies #doll advice #pink aesthetic #my post #feminine advice

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mellifluous-maiden · 2 years

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🍓 | my favorite perfumes

fragrance mist perfume

marshmallow pumpkin latte - reminds me of rory gilmore (bath and body works)

strawberry poundcake - so sweet and reminds me of strawberry shortcake (bath and body works)

garden eau de parfum - a nice blend of floral and warm notes (dolce & gabbana)

fresh cream and warm cashmere eau de toilette - a nice warm scent (philosophy)

fairytale - a great floral scent with a hint of vanilla (bath and body work)

ballet rose eau de parfum - if the nutcracker and swan lake barbie movies were a scent, it would be this (philosophy)

warm and cozy (original and sugared ver.) - one of the best vanilla-based scents ever (pink)

basic vanilla - smells like chai tea and vanilla! (pink)

lipstick fever - makes me feel like i’m the main character in a silent film (juliette has a gun)

#berry filled with thoughts #coquette #perfume #fragrance #coquette inspo #autumn #winter #spring #summer #feminine advice #feminine aesthetic #dolce and gabbana #pink #victoria’s secret #bath and body works #philosophy #juliette has a gun #recommendations

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mauvefiles · 1 year

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When a woman is consistently spoken to softly & treated gently, she becomes a new woman. You're helping her heal her nervous system, you're helping her heal generational trauma, you're allowing her feminine energy to flourish, you're helping her to remember who she is.

#black women in femininity #goddess energy #black femininity #hypergamy #high value dating #dating advice #relationship advice #self confidence

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wonnieaura · 6 months

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Getting your life back in 2024 (leveling up to the max)

♫₊˚.🎧✩｡

In 2024, leveling up your life involves a holistic approach to personal growth. Start by setting clear, achievable goals in various aspects of your life—career, relationships, health, and personal development. Cultivate a growth mindset, embracing challenges as opportunities to learn and improve.

1. **Define Your Goals:** Clearly outline what you want to achieve in different areas of your life. Break down larger goals into smaller, actionable steps.

2. **Continuous Learning:** Invest time in expanding your knowledge and skills. Read books, take courses, attend workshops, and stay curious about the world around you.

3. **Health and Wellness:** Prioritize your physical and mental well-being. Incorporate regular exercise, balanced nutrition, and sufficient sleep into your routine.

4. **Mindfulness and Self-Care:** Practice mindfulness to stay present and reduce stress. Incorporate self-care rituals into your routine, ensuring you take time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation.

5. **Build Strong Relationships:** Cultivate meaningful connections with friends, family, and colleagues. Invest time in building positive and supportive relationships.

6. **Financial Literacy:** Improve your financial knowledge and habits. Set a budget, save, and invest wisely to secure your financial future.

7. **Career Development:** Set professional goals, seek opportunities for growth, and stay adaptable in the ever-changing job market. Network and build a strong professional support system.

8. **Embrace Change:** Be open to change and view it as a chance for growth. Adaptability is a key skill in navigating life's uncertainties.

9. **Time Management:** Organize your time efficiently. Prioritize tasks, minimize distractions, and create a schedule that allows for both productivity and relaxation.

10. **Gratitude Practice:** Cultivate gratitude by reflecting on the positive aspects of your life. This mindset shift can enhance your overall well-being.

Remember, the journey of leveling up is ongoing. Regularly reassess your goals, celebrate your achievements, and stay committed to continuous improvement. As you evolve and grow, you'll find that your life becomes more fulfilling and aligned with your aspirations.

#beauty #fashion #hyper feminine #light feminine #pink moodboard #pink pilates princess #soft moodboard #that girl #beautytips #confidence #2024 #leveling up #best version #girlblogger #girlblogging #blogger #pink blog #advice blog #study blog

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femmefatalevibe · 11 months

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Femme Fatale Guide: Game-Changing TED Talks Everyone Should Watch

"How Five Simple Words Can Get You What You Want" by Janine Driver

"Master your Mindset, Overcome Self-Deception, Change your Life" by Shadé Zahrai

"How to talk to the worst parts of yourself" by Karen Faith

"Think before you speak, hacking the secret of communication" by Catherine Molloy

"The Hidden Code For Transforming Dreams Into Reality" by Mary Morrissey

"Don't Believe Everything You Think" by Lauren Weinstein

"The public speaking lesson you never had" by DK

"Programming your mind for success" by Carrie Green

"How to stop screwing yourself over" by Mel Robbins

"Own Your Behaviours, Master Your Communication, Determine Your Success" by Louise Evans

"The psychology of seduction" by Raj Persaud

"Why we're unhappy -- the expectation gap" by Nat Ware

"Think Fast. Talk Smart" by Matt Abrahams

"Increase your self-awareness with one simple fix' by Tasha Eurich

"5 steps to designing the life you want" by Bill Burnett

"Staying stuck or moving forward" by Dr. Lani Nelson Zlupko

"To reach beyond your limits by training your mind" by Marisa Peer

"Emotional laws are the answer for better relationships" by Diana Wais

"Feelings: Handle them before they handle you" by Mandy Saligari

"Cultivating Unconditional Self-Worth" by Adia Gooden

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ash-says · 2 months

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Mini steps towards being independent:

I know. I know the frustration of not being in charge of your life. Especially when you are financially dependent and for some under 20s. Everyone treats you like a child but expects you to be an adult.

Then we have the group who go on insisting they are adults and capable of taking life decisions but for the love of God can't change their bedsheet responsibly.

Thus, I have come up with some mini tricks that will make you feel just a tiny bit independent:

Anytime anywhere list

1) Learn how to cook.

2) Take responsibility for household chores such as washing clothes, utensils,etc.

3) Do groceries shopping.

4) Keep track of the essentials required at home and make sure to stock them up.

5) Change the bedsheets weekly.

6) Clean your cupboards timely.

7) Plan a trip with your friends and take care of the execution part.

8) Decide what to make for lunch, dinner or breakfast and execute it solely (right from buying the food required to cooking it).

9) Check on your younger siblings studies. Take an update of their life or keep your room organized and clean.

10) Grow plants.

Planned execution list

Live alone. Try to get out of your parental home and start a new life in another city.

Get an internship/job.

Manage your finances on a budget and save money at the same time.

Take major life decisions such as your career field, whom to be friends with, etc solely on your own judgement.

Learn to navigate difficult social situations with ease.

Adopt a pet.

Develop your own ethical system.

Curate your discipline.

Identify your non-negotiable in different aspects of life.

Learn to speak up for yourself.

That's all for today's show on ash-says. Stay tuned for more illegal tricks and explosive opinions.

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girlbloggerbby · 9 months

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Being your big sister pt²

You must change your pads every 4 hours at least, this avoids the accumulation of bacteria and diseases

Charcoal pills help to stop poisoning in your dog!

Never and ever wash your lace clothes in the washing machine please! I learned the hard way (ruined my favorite corset 😭)

Your armpits are dark and stained because you use spray deodorant, these sprays dry the area, prefer to use roll-on or cream deodorants that moisturize more

Never put out a pan on fire by throwing water! This will make it explode, throw a damp cloth over it and put out the flame, if you spilled boiling water or oil on your skin immediately go to the sink and rinse under running water for a few minutes before doing anything else

Wash your jeans stuff by hand and with neutral products because they fade easily

Mix your perfume in a moisturizer of the same fragrance (similar) or unscented and apply it to your body, this will enhance the fragrance and last longer on your skin

Magnesium pills are the holy grail for us anemic girlies, it boost our energy, help with fainting and migraines

Research more about connectives before writing an essay, learning to use new forms of connectives will diversify and increase the level of writing essays

Bathing in very hot water destroys your skin and hair by drying out and weakening it over time

Person is not happy with your achievement=stay away from these people and remove them from your life

That's it for the day and i hope i was of some help, luv y'all 🪽

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honeytonedhottie · 2 months

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general hygiene secrets + tips⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🍦

while u upgrade in other areas of ur life, its important to upgrade ur hygiene and self care game too ✨ and this post can help u do that

DOUBLE CLEANSING ;

not only for ur face but also for ur body, doing so makes me feel a million times cleaner. when i double cleanse my face i go in with an oil based cleanser then a water based cleanser.

my double cleansing body recommendations are the dove bar soap, african black soap or the soaps from the doctor bronners brand

for double cleansing my body i'll use an unscented/anti bacterial bar soap and after rinsing that off i'll use a liquid body gel or body wash that has the scent that i wanna smell like

MY TAKE ON UNSCENTED BODY PRODUCTS ;

i think that unscented body products r lowkey slept on but in that same breath i can kinda see why. personally, i like to use an unscented soap sometimes and then make my body smell even better by using a body butter or a lotion but thats SOMETIMES.

TAKE CARE OF UR FEET ;

use a foot file/foot scrub to ensure baby soft, barbie-esque feet. before bed time make sure to moisturize ur feet with a body butter ro vaseline and sleep with fuzzy socks on.

also keep ur toes clipped, filed, and preferably painted. personally i like to go for white toes cuz i just think its classic, but in general do NOT neglect ur feet.

ALL ABOUT FRAGRANCE ;

i love to collect different fragrances and buy a lot of perfumes bcuz i just love the variety, i love the adorable packaging i just LOVE perfume. dont be afraid to blend perfumes together and experiment with how different notes in different perfumes can work together and give u ur own unique scent.

dont sleep on oil perfumes either, personally i find them to be very rich and SO LONG LASTING?? they're absolutely amazing. when u apply the perfume try not to rub, instead press and apply it to ur pulse points.

HOT TIP - when spraying perfume on ur body, make sure to apply some onto the insides of ur knees + ankles bcuz smell travels upwards so when u walk by, the air will smell yummy 🎀

SLUGGING SECRETS ;

slugging urself before bed ensures that when u wake up ur body will be SOFT and SMOOTH and glowy. the basic before bed slugging routine is to go in with a deeply moisturizing body lotion/butter. ur gonna wanna lather urself completely (from the neck down to ur ankles) then use a body oil.

things to look for in a body lotion or body butter - helps with properties like firming and tightening of the skin. aids in deep moisture if ur someone who has dull or dry skin.

its important to find a body butter + oil combination that works well with ur skin and doesn't break u out (plus smells good)

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thesirencult · 9 months

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BRINGING DOWN OTHERS IS LOW VALUE

Today I had the joy of getting a message from a nice young lady who wanted to thank me for my advice and sweetly asked me if I wanted to be friends with her ❤️

This made me understand that having a platform may be a way to share our individual opinions but we should have in mind that, especially on Tumblr, many people come across our content and we have responsibility to correctly and ethically influence them by adding value to their lives.

So, I want to thank every single one of you for following me and sending sweet messages. All 1,205 of you. We are a small corner on the internet and I don't care about appearing "mysterious" and "unapproachable" to my digital friends.

If you have a question/a content suggestion or just want to say "Hi!" don't be shy and use my AMA or private messages. I'll try to answer to all of you.

Also, thank you for being patient with me as I'm finishing up with this exam season and have not posted anything in the past few days. A few of you reached out for tarot readings and a birth chart analysis and we got even closer, so thank you for trusting me with your time, money, hopes and wishes!

I asked the young lady if she wanted me to write a post about something specific or if she had any content suggestions. She told me that she wanted my opinion on "pick-me" girls who bring other women down. She added that it would be interesting to "know how do this girls think". Your wish is my command young lady!

Shall we start ?

After you queens... 👑

Have you noticed something? People who are high value and successful are always eager to extend their hand to other people full of passion and ambition. They become mentors and leaders for other women and men. They set the standard by example. Usually these people are kind hearted, yet know how and when to set boundaries.

All in all, they don't bring other people down, they build them up.

This women and men build ladders for others to climb at the top with them but they know, they have to protect themselves and their loved ones from vultures, because someone can bring you down even if you are thousand meters above them. They just have to pull the rug underneath your feet.

Someone who is high, won't try to lower someone else's value. Someone who is low is not accustomed to the loneliness of the top. They want to surround themselves with other low value individuals to feel powerful. That's the pack mentality and that's why mean girls/boys hang in crowds.

We all had that "friend". She was insecure but always downplayed. She was always jealous of other people and you could see it but you never thought she was jealous of you. Why would she be? When you talked about your crush/business idea/ambitions it was always : "Ew he is ugly.", "Who are you Elon Musk?", "A law degree? You don't even know how to think critically.".

That friend and you fell apart when you started investing in yourself, and that's when the veil fell off and you saw other girls like that.

The pick-me girls.

A couple days ago, I had a "History Of Economic Thought" exam (It's a very interesting topic to research and if a similar class is available to you, I suggest that you take it!). It was the last one I had to take in person.

I felt awful, anxious and tired. Two weeks of hard work, studying everyday, staying up till light came through the blinds and commuting two hours back and forth to and from school had made me emotionally and mentally tired. I needed some loving from my cat Mr. Mau and a toffee nut latte.

I did my 10k steps by the sea and decided to open up Pinterest and make myself feel a bit better. I searched up "fall aesthetic", "studying aesthetic", "toffee nut latte from Starbucks" etc.

Under a pin there was this comment by a girl calling all women who are "obsessed" with fall, Starbucks and cute photos of pumpkins, "silly a** basic white b*tches".

I then went on TikTok and came across a video of a woman who was being shamed for having a 35k engagement ring (you know which one I'm talking about, the one her man, an amazing king ate the interviewer up and left no crumbs). A woman had commented "she is a gold digger and when he cheats on her with a good woman she'll get what she deserves".

Excuse me what ? So a good woman is one who tries to please others by accepting less than she deserves. I'm not one who would want a 35k engagement ring, buy me a 3k one and 32k of gold for investment purposes, but if her men believed she deserved that, then so be it.

Why are you trying to get picked? Do you think men marry the good girl? Do you think any man who will only see you as an innocent, precious lovely angel will be able to take all of you?

These women are playing a dangerous game. They so badly want to get picked and mostly they get picked but for all the wrong reasons. They love how guys on podcasts praise them online for being "feminine". They love the attention of boys who find them cool.

Sweetheart, you need a man who will find your rage and your sweetness sacred.

You need parents who will understand that you have your own dreams, needs and that you are not just an extension of their egos.

These women and the so-called "good guys" (uhh don't let me get started on those") are sad inside. They would love to have your own wildness and freedom. They feel jealous that you are still that magical bitch holding your pumpkin spice latte with a fresh new set and while doing kick boxing on Wednesday afternoon.

Girls, watch some Legally Blonde. It's the literal blueprint 😉 It made me come to terms with my girly nature as a girl who grew up a tomboy.

You don't have to be just bubbly and feminine. You don't have to be just a dark feminine, femme fatale. You can be all of those things because we are multilayered beings. Lastly, we have the gift of metamorphosis. Don't be afraid to transform and break the mold.

#source:thesirencult #level up journey #leveling up #leverage #level up #divine feminine energy #feminine advice #feminine journey #dark feminine aesthetic #dark femininity #femme fatale #high value mindset #high value woman

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thedollhousediaries · 2 years

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can you help me with outfits for fall & winter? i wanna start buying them now, and i want a whole lotta pink 💞

Ahhh im honored that you would trust me with helping you cultivate your seasonal wardrobe~! I do offer stylist services for these types of things and i would love to be able to work with helping you get where you want to be! -> Style me, Barbie!

I have been obsessing over fall and winter myself! I’m really excited to get out of this texas heat. I have already started Pinterest boards and my fall shopping at thrift stores, TJMaxx, Ross, Burlington and, Marshall’s. Lets break some simple pieces down:

Most of these looks are about layering. So you will need to get you a nice set of cute cami tops! You may even have some from this summer, put them to good use! My personal favs are lace cami tops. They look so cute underneath oversized long sleeve tops and layered on top of cute silk dresses.

Next, thrift some really cute and feminine long sleeve tops and cut off sweaters. You will layer these over the camis underneath these cute sweater jackets or over a cute slip dress.

The key to finding a great sweater/long sleeve for this look is to make sure that neither are too tight! You want a very comfortable fit for the top layer thats over the cami.

The bottoms you choose will determine the vibe of the finished look!

Tights or Yoga pants: These will give you a casual ballerina/dancer vibe. Very cute for running errands, getting nails done, or going on simple friendship dates

Frilly~Tennis~Knits skirts: This option will give you a very girly and feminine vibe to your wardrobe. This option is ideal for brunch dates, shopping, and girly activities.

Shorts ~ bloomers: This look is very diverse. It can be dressed up or dressed down and its always comfortable.

Denim, Denim, Denim

Listen, you can not go wrong with a cute denim skirt or your fav pair of fitted jeans, with a zip hoodie or cardigan. Denim saves you a lot of time on layering if you want a cute look with the least amount of effort.

Get a over size zip hoodie to have a comfortable and casual vibe!

Get a fitted jacket or cardigan if you want a more sassy and intentional vibe!

-MATCHING SETS AND TRACKSUITS-

Tracksuits and matching sets will always be a autumn staple.

The tracksuit pant set gives casual to classy, and the track suit skirt combo gives prissy and girly.

༺☆༻ ༺☆༻ ༺☆༻ ༺☆༻ ༺☆༻ ༺☆༻

Accessory Suggestions:

Shoes~

Platform Fur Boots

Uggs Fur Slides

Ugg Boots in Bailey Bow

Leg Wear~

Kawaii bow leg warmers

PomPom leg warmers

Flare Bottom Yoga Pants

White dainty tights

White heart tights

Fur warmers

Misc~

Hellokitty earmuffs

Wings earmuffs

Arm warmers

Pink heart arm warmers

Overall its up to you to take these outfits and make them your own. Its very important to personalize your style to channel who you are through them. Add some really cute accessories that speak to you on a personal level. Put on what makes you comfortable and feel the best!

Here are 2 of my fav black own brands that carries really cute tracksuits that has plus size options: HONEYS APPAREL ✨ FINE GIRL OFFICIAL

Good luck, Dollmate! Don’t forget to come back and show us how cute everything turns out !

♡∩_∩

（„• ֊ •„)♡

┏━∪∪━━━━━━━━┓

TheDollHouse Hub

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#doll advice #sweet asks #personal stylist #fall season #y2k aesthetic #cyber y2k #y2kawaii #feminine advice #hyper feminine

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mellifluous-maiden · 2 years

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coquette on a budget

a lot of people have been associating the coquette community with an upscale lifestyle (Dior perfumes, Chanel dresses, etc.). there aren’t any required products to be a coquette, especially if it’s an expensive item not everyone can afford. however, if you still want to purchase clothes/products that you align with the coquette aesthetic, here’s some stores/brands that I recommend.

makeup and skin care

drugstores and 5 below contain a lot of products at affordable prices!

makeup brands you can find include elf, maybelline, revlon, covergirl, nyx, and wet n wild

some products I’d recommend are maybelline’s fit me face powder and lasting fix spray, wet n wild’s high-shine lipstick, and elf’s bite size eyeshadows

for makeup removal, it’s best to use micellar water, but it’s okay to use wipes if you have to. buy a pack with micellar water in it

burt’s bees, cerave, and cetaphil are good brands for skincare, but you can also find store-brand products at a lower price

unless you have any specific skin concerns, use a facial cleanser, a moisturizer, and an spf. as long as you use a small, yet effective, amount twice a day, these can last you months

body care and fragrance

like makeup and skin care, you can find body products at the drugstore

I’d recommend using Dove’s soap bars and body washes since the bars come in multi-packs and the washes last longer

Dove also has body washes for acne, which I’d also recommend

a good fragrance brand that is a dupe for Bath and Body Works is Bodycology! they’re sold at stores like walmart, meijer, and kmart

stores like 5 below also carry nice fragrances for $5 or less

if you want to have a signature scent, align your body wash, body moisturizer, and fragrance mist’s scents (ex: Dove’s blue fig/orange blossom wash and Bodycology’s picnic breeze)

clothes

thrift stores are definitely a good option. make sure what stores are around you, what they sell, and if they have any sales

keep an eye out for any garage sale signs in your neighborhood! you never know what you could find

don’t obsess over having your entire wardrobe looking coquette. it’s okay to have a pair of sweatpants and graphic tees

#berry filled with thoughts #coquette #coquette inspo #femininity #beauty on a budget #makeup #thrifting #aesthetic #feminine advice #feminine aesthetic #recommendations

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xoxomireya · 5 months

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！ᶻz﹒the ultimate friendship guide﹒🦢﹕⤾

tysm for requesting @jasminejournal < 3 ! i had a lot of fun making this.

I. YOU CAN’T NATURALLY MATCH WITH EVERYONE

First things first: You can’t be friends with everyone. apart from the obvious “a friend to all is a friend to none”, it’s quite unrealistic to expect everyone to like you, and that’s okay! You just have to acknowledge that you aren’t meant to be liked by everyone.

Find people who are like-minded, who give you the same energy back, who have the same values, people that have healed and don’t bring their baggage and toxicity into the friendship. quality >>> quantity. Not everyone is meant for you and that’s okay, because we are not seeking quantity, we are looking for quality friends who have all the values i listed before and the ones you also find important.

The world is your oyster. in this era it’s easier than ever to make friends: meet a lot of people, say yes to plans, go to events, network, etc. The more people you meet the more you will realize that you can’t match naturally with everyone, some people are just not your vibe and the more people you meet the more likely you are to find someone you do mesh well together with. I completely understand that it might be harder for some people who are introverted or have social anxiety to socialize, but in that case I really recommend to work firstly on yourself because a lot of the times those things are triggered by insecurities and a bad relationship with oneself. I also recommend to practice with people online or people who know nothing about you, because that’s the thing: they know nothing about you. If you’re insecure, they don’t know that. If you’re acting in a confident way even though you’re not, they’re also not going to know because they don’t know the way you think or act.

Maybe the problem is YOU. Ifyou’re always losing friendships and struggling to maintain them, maybe the common denominator is you because you have issues you need to introspect. Focus on yourself for some time and fix all the issues that might be making you repel high-value people such as being insecure, romanticizing your sadness, having toxic and jealous behaviors…

II. WHERE AND HOW TO MEET PEOPLE

Like-minded communities !! You need to utilize the resources you have to make friends. friends that last are the ones who think in a similar way and who share similar values and interests, and you’re more likely to find like-minded people in like-minded communities. Build up the courage to go and do things alone so you become comfortable in going to places to meet people alone.

Some like-minded communities can be classes in which they teach hobbies of yours because when there’s a community of people whom you have to coexist with you will be forced to work together in a team and talk to each other and that will make it a lot more easier to make friends. Plus, you’re taking the same class so you’re going to have an interest/hobby to bond over which means automatic conversations without any awkwardness. Another option is to become a regular literally ANYWHERE. Ranging from a coffee shop to a gym, when you become a regular you familiarize with the staff and other regulars.

We’re living in an era in which technology can help you with almost anything. Use this to your advantage! Make online friends, use social media to search for like-minded people, download apps to make friends such as bumble bff…

III. HIGH-VALUE FRIENDS.

Now that you’ve prepared yourself and know where to find friends, let’s talk about how to know when someone is right for you.

Look for people who strive to be the best version of themselves and who are surrounded by positive energy. You are who you surround yourself with, so make friends that bring you positivity and who inspire you. Make sure that you both share how you want your future to look like and have similar future plans. Meshing well with them is a must. For example, someone who prefers and feels more comfortable having low maintenance friendships won’t match with someone who prefers to have high maintenance friendships.

And of course, respect is needed. You cross my boundaries? You’re out. Any sort of toxic or jealous behavior is NOT normal and you should not be friends or be influenced by that type of people.

IV. WHAT TO TALK ABOUT AND HOW TO BE A GOOD FRIEND.

Do NOT come off as desperate. “What if they don’t like me?” Thinking like that will only make you be so immerse in your thoughts that all of your confidence will disappear. Focus on having a “How can I make them feel comfortable and understood?” mindset, you’re now not thinking only about yourself and being self-conscious, so you’re going to appear more confident and since now you’re focusing on listening and making the other person feel comfortable you will make an amazing first impression.

Ask them questions about themselves. People love talking about themselves and this will immediately make them like you. Do not make it look like an interview, tho. Make sure you provide your input too which shouldn’t be hard because every question you ask is going to be redirected to you. You can also start the conversation with a compliment!

Friendship is a two way street. It needs to go both ways and you need to follow up with each other. What are they offering you? What are YOU offering them? Think about what can you give without forgetting what can you receive. The type of friend you want is the type of friend you need to be

V. HOW TO MAINTAIN FRIENDSHIPS

Everyone has the type of friendship maintenance they feel more comfortable with, but it's a fact that low-maintenance friendships are tho ones that last. Even if you feel more comfortable having high maintenance friendships, make sure that both of you can accomodate to having to maintain the friendship even when both of you are busy.

COMMUNICATION!!! I assure you that there's probably going to be a lot of hardships and misundersatings in your friendships (And that's not bad, we're human) and no proper communication will lead to the deterioration of the friendship.

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succulentsiren · 1 month

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Advice I'd Give to My Younger Self.

Be unapologetic about your presence. Never enter a room with your head lowered. Hold your head up like you are proud to be who you are. Take up space. Be bold in your actions. Let your voice be heard.

You don't have to be perfect. Get over perfectionism and the fear of being embarrassed. Learn to own all your flaws and insecurities and continue to do what you love.

What other people say mean nothing. Never loose sleep over anyone’s opinion of you. They are not God and they don't define you.

Believe in yourself. You can be successful just like those people you look up to. You have what it takes. Hone your skills and be great too.

Appreciate your unique gifts and qualities. Stop comparing yourself to others and changing yourself to fit in. Always stay true to yourself.

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wonnieaura · 5 months

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THE IT GIRL MINDSET

The "it girl" mindset is all about embracing your individuality and exuding confidence and self-assuredness. Here are some steps in becoming the it girl you desire to be especially in 2024 🫶🏻

1. Embrace your individuality: Don't try to conform to societal beauty standards or compare yourself to others. Be true to who you are and celebrate your unique qualities.

2. Exude confidence and self-assuredness: Wear what you feel good in, speak with confidence, and hold your head up high. When you feel confident and assured, others will notice and respond in kind.

3. Focus on internal beauty: Take care of your mental and emotional well-being, and focus on being a good person. When you feel good on the inside, it shows on the outside.

4. Practice self-care: When you practice self-care and take care of yourself, you feel more comfortable in your own skin and exude confidence and self-assuredness.

5. Surround yourself with positive and supportive people: Seek out friends, family, and mentors who lift you up and celebrate your successes. Avoid negative and toxic people who bring you down.

6. Practice gratitude: Writing down and focusing on what you're grateful for can help shift your mindset and help you adopt an "it girl" mentality.

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femmefatalevibe · 10 months

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25 Life Lessons I've Learned In 25 Years

In honor of turning 25 this month, here are some lessons I wish someone could've baked into my brain by 18. Hope this helps xx

Putting yourself first is not selfish, it is an act of self-care. Actively discounting others is not the same as protecting your peace.

Pay attention to who gossips and keeps to themselves amidst an interpersonal conflict. Insecure people or those in the wrong will speak the loudest and go on the longest in a fight to prove their innocence. Individuals who are self-assured and comfortable with the truth know it's better to communicate their feelings appropriately and then move past it. Confidence is assertive, tactful, and relatively silent.

If you want to know who to believe in an argument, pay attention to how both sides speak about the conflict. The perpetrator will often speak about the individuals' character/morality while the victim will explain their personal experience in the context of the relevant situation.

Display empathy and consideration, but don't live to satisfy others' emotional needs and expectations. Say farewell to anyone who dismisses or guilts you for your own needs, emotions, priorities/life goals & aspirations.

Your needs matter. No one needs to approve or validate your desires. If someone feels they have control over you or tries to persuade you to change your mind to ensure you put their emotions and needs first, cut them out of your life. They do not care about you.

Almost no one deserves insider access into your life and mind. Upholding your right to privacy – especially regarding your finances, dating life, health conditions/concerns, and long-term goals – is the simplest way to protect your peace.

A friend to all is a friend to none. Be wary of those who will not stand up for you behind closed doors. These people do not care about you, they care about what your place in their life does for them and their ego.

Be radically honest and accepting of who you are. Don't apologize for your preferences, aspirations, and values. You deserve to live in a way that makes you happy, not to appease others in hopes of their approval or future favors due to your karmic good deeds.

You deserve happiness, love, and nice things, life experiences, relationships, and opportunities in your life regardless of what others may or may not possess/ be able to experience. Dispel this scarcity mindset ASAP. Jealousy and internalized shame are destructive to your self-esteem and all your relationships.

You are worthy and offer many incredible, unique gifts to the world. Don't allow naysayers, critics, or bullies (of any age) to dim your light or sacrifice pursuing your dreams. Decide you're the leader of your own life. Then act accordingly.

Direct communication is always the way. Remain tactful, but at least when dealing with non-manipulative people, always say what you mean and mean what you say. It will save a lot of trouble and petty disagreements that could've been avoided with clearer communication.

You don't owe anyone an explanation for your feelings, emotions, and actions that don't have a direct, inescapable impact on someone else. "No" is a complete sentence.

Approach conversations as a meeting of the minds. Healthy debate or conflict is about seeking to understand the other person, not prove yourself right. Leaving your ego at the door will allow you to expand your mind and avoid many unnecessary conflicts or arguments.

If it's not a hell yes, it's a no. For a job, date, sex, attendance at a time-sucking social event, family gatherings, an informal meeting not essential for you to keep your job, a wedding, birthday party, holiday invitation, etc. Outside of your contracted hours and time necessary to keep yourself/your home clean & well-maintained, you should spend your time exactly as you please. Doing things you don't want to do will only breed resentment down the line toward yourself and others.

Detangle yourself from any who refuses to self-reflect and take accountability. This person is selfish and will never see you as fully human with emotions, needs, and a complete life/internal world of your own. Cut them out (or at least fully emotionally detach and limit contact with them) immediately.

Speak your truth, but always say a little less than you feel necessary. Overexplaning and oversharing do you no favors. At a minimum, this approach allows you to protect your peace. In the worst circumstances, this tactic can also save you from a lot of trouble in your personal or professional life.

Learn to ask for a little more than you're comfortable with, but do so with grace, tact, and confidence. Whether it's a salary/rate negotiation, flight/hotel/restaurant accommodations, get in the habit of making that slightly higher/up-leveled request like you're expecting a "yes." You can't get something you don't ask for, so speak up and show you know your worth. This habit can bring a lot of great opportunity into your life and builds up your confidence.

Everyone is on their own timeline and path. Don't compare yourself to others' credentials, job titles, relationship status, net worths, or jean sizes. Comparison is truly the thief of joy. Remaining envious of others only takes up the energy that could otherwise be used to elevate or enrich your life.

Become clear on your priorities, and remain diligent with your habits & routines. Set SMART goals. Implement healthy habits and rituals into your daily lifestyle. Be consistent with goal-supporting and wellness rituals (generous sleep schedule, healthful eating habits, daily movement/regular exercise, reading, task time-blocking, cleaning, and life/work admin schedule), so they become second nature. Help yourself by creating these default habits to ensure your brain is wired for success whether you're in an easygoing era or a stressful life season.

Stop seeing other people (especially other women) as your competition in your profession/dating life and within your platonic relationships. Use your immediate criticisms as a tool for self-reflection. Actively deconstruct the patriarchy in every aspect of your life. Other women coworkers, dating prospects, and friends are not your rivals nor individuals who should be evaluated based on their assertiveness, sexual history/appeal, relationship status, or desire to perform traditional maternal/domestic roles.

Understanding how to interact with others in a cordial, tactful manner is significantly more important than having everyone like you. Learn how to positively influence people without seeking approval. What other people think of us is none of our business. All we can do is show up as the best version of ourselves, and remain optimistic about a potential connection.

Acceptance, accountability, and consistent discipline are the holy trinity to creating a sustainable change that you can maintain for the long haul. There's no shame in starting from the bottom, but you need to be honest about where you're at, so you can create a realistic game plan/small behavior-changing habits that stack up over time to help you implement the radical change you're craving.

Let go of any internalized shame. Being the "good girl" does you no favors in life. Set a standard and expectation to be respected, not to be perceived as "innocent" or submissive – this is how you get taken advantage of in professional, platonic, and intimate relationships. Remain ravenous for respect. It's the only way to live life to the fullest.

24. Investing in your appearance is a form of self-respect. Wanting to look & feel your best and present yourself in the best light possible to others is not a superficial pursuit. Remain unwavering about your hygiene/beauty/grooming routines, deliberate styling choices, healthy eating & workout habits, and mindfulness of social graces. You're your #1 publicist, so act like it. Life is all about embracing satisfaction with a sprinkle of reputation management.

25. Be unapologetic about your financial ambitions, priorities, investments, savings goals, etc. Financial freedom IS freedom. The only way to change the system is to break it from the inside out. Leverage is everything. Allocate, and assert your (financial) power wisely.

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