its-me-levi

[its-me-levi]

𝓐𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓵𝓭 𝓬𝓪𝓿𝓮𝓼 𝓲𝓷

𝓟𝓪𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰(𝓼): 𝐿𝑒𝑒 𝒯𝒶𝑒𝓎𝑜𝓃𝑔 𝓍 𝒦𝒾𝓂 𝒟𝑜𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓃𝑔 (𝒩𝒞𝒯)

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓻𝓮: 𝒜𝓃𝑔𝓈𝓉

𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰(𝓼): 𝐵𝑜𝓂𝒷𝒾𝓃𝑔

𝓢𝓾𝓶𝓶𝓪𝓻𝔂: 𝒯𝒶𝑒𝓎𝑜𝓃𝑔 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒟𝑜𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓃𝑔 𝓈𝒽𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝒾𝓇 𝓁𝒶𝓈𝓉 𝓂𝑜𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝑜𝑔𝑒𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝒷𝑒𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒷𝑜𝓂𝒷𝒾𝓃𝑔

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s ugly. It’s beautiful, too, but in an ugly sort of way. Everything seems so finalized, so over, and maybe it seems that way because it is that way. The sky is dark, because it’s night time, but it feels dark in a way that’s more than just its appearance. There’s that sinking feeling, ever present, pressing down on Taeyong’s stomach less and less gently as the night continues on. He knows it’s coming, that’s what all the radio stations and news channels said, that’s what people have been screaming in their squeaky panicked voices as they run through the streets as though this is something they can run from. He just doesn’t know when, and that’s the scary part. He doesn’t know exactly how much longer he’s got.

He knows exactly where he wants to spend that “however much longer”, and that’s exactly where he is now. Sitting in the bed of this beat-up old truck with the love of his life at his side, parked at the edge of a cliff, overlooking the city, every light on and siren wailing, as if curling up in bomb shelters will save anyone. Taeyong knows he’ll be dead before the sun rises tomorrow morning, and he would rather his last moments be ones filled with hushed bliss than overwhelming terror. Taeyong had never been scared to die, until he met Doyoung, met his something to lose . He’s not scared anymore. He knows neither of them will make it out alive, and if they’re both going to die, it may as well happen in each other’s arms. That would be nice , he thinks.

He reaches both of his arms out to Doyoung, beckoning the beautiful ebony-haired boy in for a hug. A hug that, if Taeyong has his way, will never end. Doyoung obliges, scooting closer so that they can be at least somewhat comfortable, not having to stretch their arms too much or lean over too far in order to embrace one another. Taeyong gently nuzzles his nose against the intersection where Doyoung’s neck fades into shoulders and collarbone, and he feels more than hears Doyoung’s breathy laugh breezing through his hair.

Doyoung’s voice is tentative, choked a bit with fear, and Taeyong can feel Doyoung’s Adam’s apple move against his temple as he swallows. He asks, “Is it wrong for me to be laughing?” A dry chuckle passes his lips for a second, and he has to pause, and Taeyong can feel him swallow back a sob. “I mean, we’re about to die.”

Taeyong uses his pointer finger to rub tiny circles against the small of Doyoung’s back, and shakes his head. “No, I don’t think it’s wrong. I think we should try to be as happy as possible in these last moments, rather than spending them in debilitating fear.” He turns his head to the side a few degrees to press a chaste kiss to the side of Doyoung’s neck, and after a few seconds, feels Doyoung’s lips gently touch the top of his head.

Taeyong pulls his head away from where it’s tucked to look at Doyoung, eyes tracing over the features he’d memorized long ago: soft eyes that always looked at Taeyong like he was the center of the universe (and he was, in a sense), a strong jawline that Doyoung always knew how to show off when he wanted to, a beautiful striking nose that Taeyong loved to run a single finger down the bridge of before gently kissing the tip. Taeyong tries to meet Doyoung’s gaze every time he shifts it, but Doyoung’s eyes are always one step ahead of his. Doyoung whispers, barely more than a breath, “What are you looking at?”, the tiniest of smiles peeking its rays above the horizon.

“You. Only you. Always you.”

Doyoung laughs again, louder this time, like he’s allowing himself to do it despite the fact that he thinks the time isn’t right. The sound rains down on Taeyong’s ears, weaving its way into his brain like a mixture of honey and liquid gold, and he never wants to forget that sound. He never wants to forget anything about Doyoung, not the sound of his laugh, or the sound of his voice, or the way sometimes his smile looks like he can’t tell whether he’s happy or in pain, or the way he looks at Taeyong, or the way he’ll coo at babies and make them laugh. Taeyong sends up a silent prayer, not quite sure who to, that if there is an afterlife, he’ll never forget a single part of Doyoung.

Doyoung pulls Taeyong closer again, using one hand to cage Taeyong’s head against his chest. Taeyong can hear Doyoung’s heartbeat, erratic at first, but as he cards his fingers through Taeyong’s hair, it calms down, becoming soft and steady after a few moments. Taeyong leans into the touch, pulling Doyoung as close as he possibly can, rubbing his left ring finger up and down Doyoung’s backs, counting the discs of the boy’s spine. Taeyong whispers, more to himself than Doyoung, “I hope I never forget you.”

Doyoung hears him, and Taeyong feels the body wrapped in his arms jerk as Doyoung chokes back a sob. Taeyong’s left hand roams up from where it’s counted seven of the ridges of Doyoung’s spine, twirling the strands of hair at the back of Doyoung’s head around his fingers. Doyoung’s voice is weak, afraid to speak too loud lest the sobs fighting to be released from the back of his throat manage to break through the wall holding them back. “I don’t want to ever forget you, no matter what.”

Taeyong doesn’t want to cry tonight. Hearing Doyoung so close to it is making a lump rise in his throat, and he swallows it down adamantly, burying his face deeper in Doyoung’s chest, because he knows if he pulls back and looks at Doyoung’s face and the grief that he knows must be webbed across it right now, he won’t be able to hold back those tears anymore. Then again, maybe crying wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. They have every right to, don’t they?

Doyoung is all Taeyong has, has been all he has for a long time now, and the world is ending tonight, and once that nuclear bomb set to make the whole world cave in is dropped in who knows how long, there will be nothing left. Nothing to come back to, no one to come back at all, nothing left of either of them. They’ll lose one another, forever, in an indeterminate amount of time that’s definitely less than six hours.

He can feel the stabbing heat of tears pricking at the corners of his eyes, and he squints to try to hold them back, but that just squeezes them out. Just as he feels one of his tears get absorbed into the fabric of Doyoung’s favorite sweater, he feels a single droplet of water hit the nape of his neck. He curls his hands into tight fists, balling up soft fabric within them, trying to pull Doyoung even closer, as if that’s possible. They stay like that for a while, shedding quiet tears in the comfort of one another’s arms, trying their damned hardest to forget about their impending doom, but their damned hardest isn’t enough.

Once Taeyong finally manages to stop the tears from pouring out of his eyes like water surging through a broken dam, he pulls his head back away from Doyoung’s chest, forcing himself to have the courage to meet Doyoung’s broken face, with its cracked expression and shattered eyes. He laughs, a sad laugh this time, one tinged with agony, and briefly removes one hand from where it’s curled into Doyoung’s sweater to gesture at the world all around them. “You always said you’d love me to the end of the world. Look around us, darling. The world is ending.” He shifts up onto his knees and leans forward to press a gentle kiss right between Doyoung’s eyes, settling back down and whispering, “Every time I said ‘I love you to death’, I meant it.”

Doyoung’s whisper is barely above the volume of a breath. “I know.”

Taeyong bends his neck forward, moving his head down to pepper kisses to every single one of the tiny freckles that traipse along Doyoung’s collarbone like stars. Taeyong used to love playing little games of connecting the dots while they tried to fall asleep, creating constellations, giving them names and even making up stories behind them if he was feeling particularly creative. His own voice matches Doyoung’s now, barely louder than the quietest of breaths. He knows if he speaks any louder, he’ll break down in sobs again, and he doesn’t want that right now. “I love you to death.”

“I love you to death too.” It’s at that exact moment that Taeyong sees it happen, sees the bomb fall from the sky, just barely visible because it’s so far away, but he knows the blast will reach them in mere minutes, if not seconds. Doyoung can’t see it, but Taeyong knows he knows it’s over. He can see the faintest glitter of fear spark in Doyoung’s eyes, and he can feel Doyoung’s nails digging into his back as he yanks Taeyong as close as possible, crashing their lips together in one last desperate kiss. Taeyong closes his eyes, focusing on nothing but Doyoung, mumbling countless sweet nothings into Doyoung’s mouth, thinking about how once this is over for good, everything will be okay again. Everything. Everything. There’s a brief flash of the worst pain Taeyong thinks he’s ever felt, and then everything is gone. There’s nothing left, not a single tiny glimmer of either of them, but everything is okay.

(This is not original, credit to Horizsan on AO3)

#gay #nct angst #doyoung #taeyong #nct 127 #nctzen #kpop angst #lee taeyong x kim doyoung

[its-me-levi]

𝓦𝓮 𝓪𝓻𝓮 𝓪𝓵𝔀𝓪𝔂𝓼 𝓫𝓮𝓼𝓲𝓭𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾, 𝓷𝓸 𝓶𝓪𝓽𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝔀𝓱𝓪𝓽 (𝓟𝓽. 2)

𝓟𝓪𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰(𝓼): 𝒪𝒯𝟪 𝒮𝒦𝒵 𝓍 𝓂𝒶𝓁𝑒 𝓇𝑒𝒶𝒹𝑒𝓇

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓻𝓮: 𝒻𝓁𝓊𝒻𝒻, 𝓈𝓁𝒾𝑔𝒽𝓉 𝒶𝓃𝑔𝓈𝓉? (𝒸𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒶𝒸𝓉𝑒𝓇𝓈 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝓅𝓇𝑒𝓉𝓉𝓎 𝒶𝓃𝑔𝓈𝓉𝓎)

𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰(𝓼): 𝓈𝑒𝓍𝓊𝒶𝓁 𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉; 𝓈𝓉𝒶𝓁𝓀𝒾𝓃𝑔; 𝓎𝒶𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓈; 𝓈𝓌𝑒𝒶𝓇𝒾𝓃𝑔, 𝓇𝒶𝓏𝑜𝓇 𝒷𝓁𝒶𝒹𝑒𝓈

𝓢𝓾𝓶𝓶𝓪𝓻𝔂: 𝒮𝒦𝒵 & 𝑀/𝓃 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝒷𝑒𝓈𝓉 𝒻𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒹𝓈, 𝒮𝒦𝒵 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒 𝒽𝒾𝓂 𝒶 𝓁𝒾𝓉𝓉𝓁𝑒 𝓉𝑜𝑜 𝓂𝓊𝒸𝒽

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They all talked for a bit until the bell rang. M/n headed to class with his friend Xen, Lara’s significant other. Stray Kids walked from behind them staring lovingly at M/n. Once they arrived to class, the eight boys had to find seats at the back due to everyone else already taking their seats.

The classes were boring, but break soon came and M/n met up with the rest of his friends outside of class. “Dude, Math was so boring!” M/n winged. After a few seconds, Liam met up with the group at their table and sat right next to M/n to which the latter responded by tensing up. Stray Kids took notice.

Liam put his hand on M/n upper thigh while leaning further into M/n’s neck. “So... how was everyone’s class?” M/n’s voice trembled slightly. “It was great actually! I had sport so I had fun.” Zac said, not even flinching at what Liam was doing as he didn’t see the problem. “Can we kill them? We could cover it up pretty easily and our Baby Fox deserves better then these jackasses...” Jeongin mumbled to the other seven boys standing up. They all silently agreed to have Hyunjin go ‘to the studio to practice his dance’ again.

Luckily, the bell rang again, indicating 3rd period. M/n hurried to grab his bag and to head off to history. After a few hours, the last bell rang for the end of the day so M/n and Stray Kids left the school after a ‘final hug’ from Liam which consisted of him squeezing M/n too tightly and Liam breathing into the nape of M/n’s neck.

“Ah, sorry guys, I just got a text from my instructor saying I have to go into the studio for more dance practice. Bye guys! And bye my prince.” Hyunjin said to M/n while winking. That left the eight of them to head home together. While they went home, Hyunjin hurried off to find where Liam went.

When Liam walked home, he felt a gut feeling but decided to ignore it in favour of getting home. Hyunjin was so close, he could taste to metallic taste of blood in his mouth. The razor blade he held was quietly swaying with each step he took. Hearing footsteps behind him, Liam turned around.

#stray kids #stray kids x male reader #stray kids x reader #hyunjin #seungmin #lee know #lee felix #changbin #skz chan #polyamourous #yandere skz #skz x you #skz #gay #han jisung #jeongin #skz x reader #skz x male reader

[its-me-levi]

𝓨𝓸𝓾 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓶𝓮, 𝓪𝓵𝔀𝓪𝔂𝓼 𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻

𝓟𝓪𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰(𝓼): 𝒦𝒶𝒾 𝓍 𝒯𝒶𝑒𝓂𝒾𝓃 (𝒮𝓊𝓅𝑒𝓇𝑀)

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓻𝓮: 𝒻𝓁𝓊𝒻𝒻, 𝒿𝓊𝓈𝓉 𝓅𝓊𝓇𝑒 𝒻𝓁𝓊𝒻𝒻

𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰(𝓼): 𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃𝑒𝒹 𝓉𝓇𝒶𝓃𝓈 𝒸𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒶𝒸𝓉𝑒𝓇 (𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎 𝒶 𝓌𝒶𝓇𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔)

𝓢𝓾𝓶𝓶𝓪𝓻𝔂: 𝐵𝒶𝓀𝑒𝓇𝓎 𝑜𝓌𝓃𝑒𝓇 𝒯𝒶𝑒𝓂𝒾𝓃 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝓉𝒶𝓉𝓉𝑜𝑜 𝓅𝒶𝓇𝓁𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝑜𝓌𝓃𝑒𝓇 𝒦𝒶𝒾 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝓋𝑒𝓇𝓎 𝓂𝓊𝒸𝒽 𝒾𝓃 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was a chilly day as Kai stepped out of the car after kissing his boyfriend of 2 years goodbye. Just a week ago, his boyfriend Taemin got surgery to complete his transition. Taemin is a 5ft8 man who owns a small bakery outside of the city. Kai, on the other hand, is a 5ft11 man who owns a tattoo parlour. Back to the present, after Kai kissed his boyfriend, he said “I love you, mon petit nounours.”

He hurried off to buy a train ticket to head into the city. He told his boyfriend that he would be heading in to buy some more ink for his shop, but that was not the case. Kai was actually going to pick up the ring he ordered for his boyfriend, an engagement ring. The train came a few minutes later and so Kai quickly got on and found a seat near the back of the train, knowing people will avoid seating next to him due to his scary stature. He carefully took out the photograph Taemin gifted him on their first date as a reminder. Kai got off at his stop and rushed to the jewellery store to pick up the ring.

About 10 minutes later, he left the store and headed back home after buying some ink to look like he was in the city for that. He met up with his boyfriend at the train station and got into the car. The two lovers headed home and entered their shared house. “I bought the new ink, it’s purple and green.” said Kai. “Oh! While you were gone, I made an apple pie, would you like some?” Taemin replied. After a few hours, they got dressed to go on the date Kai set up. Once they got to their destination, Taemin found out it was a beautiful hill with fairy lights set up in the trees, a picnic on the floor and pretty stars in the sky. “Kai… This is wonderful! How did you plan this?” Taemin asked, amazed.

“I was able to get some of the guys to set this up while we were at home. Do you like it?” Kai answered. “It’s wonderful!!” They ate and stargazed for about an hour. “The stars are beautiful, aren’t they?” Taemin questioned. “Yeah… beautiful.” Kai said, but he wasn’t looking at the stars, his head was facing towards his boyfriend and his face held the most love-struck look like Taemin was his whole universe. They both stood up, but before they could leave, Kai stopped his boyfriend. “Taemin, you make me believe that there’s heaven on earth. You light up even my darkest days that you truly are brighter than the sun itself. You’ve made me the happiest man these past few years and I hope you can still love me in the future. So will you…”

“...Lee Taemin take this man to be your lovely wedded husband?” the priest asked. “I do,” Taemin replied. “I now pronounce you husband and husband. You may now kiss the groom.” Kai and Taemin kissed with their close friends and family cheering in the background. The fact that a few months ago, they were standing on that hill, tears in their eyes when Taemin said yes. All it took was that one train ride to the city.

#superM #kai x taemin #taemin x kai #lee taemin #kim jongin #jongin #exo kai #taemin #kpop fluff #oneshot #superm imagines #superm taemin #superm kai

[its-me-levi]

𝓦𝓮 𝓪𝓻𝓮 𝓪𝓵𝔀𝓪𝔂𝓼 𝓫𝓮𝓼𝓲𝓭𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾, 𝓷𝓸 𝓶𝓪𝓽𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝔀𝓱𝓪𝓽 (𝓟𝓽. 1)

𝓟𝓪𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰(𝓼): 𝒪𝒯𝟪 𝓎𝒶𝓃𝒹𝑒𝓇𝑒 𝒮𝒦𝒵 𝓍 𝓂𝒶𝓁𝑒 𝓇𝑒𝒶𝒹𝑒𝓇

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓻𝓮: 𝐹𝓁𝓊𝒻𝒻

𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰(𝓼): 𝒮𝓉𝒶𝓁𝓀𝒾𝓃𝑔, 𝓈𝑒𝓍𝓊𝒶𝓁 𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒶𝓈𝓈𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉? (𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝓇𝑒𝒶𝓁𝓁𝓎)

𝓢𝓾𝓶𝓶𝓪𝓻𝔂: 𝒮𝒦𝒵 & 𝑀/𝓃 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝒷𝑒𝓈𝓉 𝒻𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒹𝓈, 𝒮𝒦𝒵 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒 𝒽𝒾𝓂 𝒶 𝓁𝒾𝓉𝓉𝓁𝑒 𝓉𝑜𝑜 𝓂𝓊𝒸𝒽

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The walk was eerie, even at 4:30pm, as he got off the bus to get back to his house. The amount of fear he had was indescribable considering the noises he kept hearing every five seconds. The poor boy was almost at the crossing when he heard a thump from behind him. Without looking behind, he busted into a full-on sprint to get away from the source of the noise. The boy knew he had stalkers, but he didn’t know they would get this close. He couldn’t contact the police or tell his friends about these stalkers as every time he did, that exact friend wouldn’t believe him and think he’s crazy.

His friends started distancing themselves from him a bit and his only close friends were eight boys named: Chan (the oldest), Lee know (the more cold-hearted one), Changbin (the shortest), Hyunjin (the tallest one), Jisung (the squirrel-looking one), Felix (one of the aussies), Seungmin (the puppy-like one) and Jeongin (the youngest of the eight). They were the only ones who stuck by him through all this and were the only ones he had told that believed him or that weren’t dead. Once the boy made it to the round-a-bout, his racing heart calmed down a bit as he saw his house on the other side of the street at the corner.

He swiftly took out his keys and entered the house he shares with the boys. “I’m home!” he called out. “Welcome home M/n!” Chan had answered from the kitchen, already making dinner for the nine of them. The boy, now known as M/n, had taken his shoes off and walked into the kitchen, giving Chan a quick hug before settling down on one of the many chairs at the table. “M/n’s home? Oh! Welcome back!” Jeongin said, giving his cutest smile to the boy. Suddenly, the rest of them sat down or helped Chan prepare dinner, all while saying hello to M/n.

Hyunjin had just come back from a bit of dance practice a few moments ago, so he had yet to settle down at the table. “How was school Baby Boy?” Chan asked, setting down dinner in front of everyone. “Ah… the usual, but I did get my math test back! 20/20!” he exclaimed gleefully, making the boys coo. “That’s amazing, Sunshine!” Felix responded to his exclamation. “I was the only one too!” M/n smiled. They all chatted while eating the many foods provided, making small conversation and laughing.

“And then the teacher got so mad that he had to leave!” The boy finished his story, making everyone burst out into laughter. “That’s a really funny story, Teddy bear.” Changbin stifled. By the time they all finished eating and did their nightly routine, it was around 9pm. “Goodnight guys…” M/n yawned as he made his way into his room. “Goodnight M/n!” The boys yelled back, already in their respective rooms, each sharing with another. The next morning was a Saturday, meaning the only M/n was still softly sleeping, when Lee Know came in to wake him up. “M/n- Oh. Never mind.” He said, carefully shutting the door and walking downstairs.

“Kitten’s sleeping, don’t be too loud.” Lee Know mentioned, giving everyone else a death stare. “Anyway, have you seen the way he talks about Liam? He clearly doesn’t like him that much.” Seungmin noted. “I’ve noticed that too. Should we talk to him about it?” Hyunjin asked. “No, he won’t tell us the truth if we do that.” Chan intervened. “Remember how we’re allowed to go to Uni with him next week? What if we observe what’s happening then?” Jeongin suggested. “That would work, Nice thinking!” Jisung exclaimed quietly to not wake up the sleeping boy. After a few hours, M/n woke up and headed downstairs to the lounge where the rest were chilling or playing games. He walked over to where Felix and Hyunjin were playing a video game on the PS4 and sat down in Felix’s lap, curling in on himself and going back to sleep.

Startled for a second, Felix moved so that they were both comfortable and continued on with the game, ending up with this happening until lunch. The weekend after that passed by a lot quicker than they all hoped, but soon it was Monday and they all headed to M/n’s school. “I’m so excited that it’s the last week of school and that you all are coming with me!” the boy beamed. “Are you still working this week or is it free time?” Han asked. “Uh… right, it’s free time.” He answered after a moment.

The group of 9 got out of the car and into the school, making people give them a few glances. Once finished with his locker, he ran up to his best friend Lara, squeezing her a bit. “Lara, these are Stray Kids, boys this is Lara.” M/n introduced them jokingly, knowing they have met before.

Soon, Liam started approaching them, making the boys side-eye each other. “Hey M/n.” the boy said while hugging him. The older boys noticed how short M/n made the hug and knew that they were correct about how Liam makes him uncomfortable. The day at the start was going smoothly with M/n’s friends meeting Stray Kids and vice-versa.

#skz x reader #skz x you #skz x male reader #stray kids #skz #han jisung #lee know #changbin #jeongin #lee felix #skz chan #yandere skz #hyunjin #seungmin #male reader #gay #polyamourous #stray kids x reader #stray kids x male reader

[its-me-levi]

𝓘𝓷 𝓪𝓷𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻 𝓵𝓲𝓯𝓮, 𝓘 𝔀𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓶𝓪𝓴𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓼𝓽𝓪𝔂

𝓟𝓪𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰(𝓼): 𝒥𝑜𝒽𝓃𝓃𝓎 𝓍 𝑀𝒶𝓇𝓀 (𝒩𝒞𝒯)

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓻𝓮: 𝒜𝓃𝑔𝓈𝓉

𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰(𝓼): 𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒶𝒸𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝒹𝑒𝒶𝓉𝒽, 𝓀𝓃𝒾𝓋𝑒𝓈, 𝒽𝑜𝓈𝓅𝒾𝓉𝒶𝓁𝓈, 𝒶𝓈𝓈𝒶𝓊𝓁𝓉, 𝒹𝑒𝓅𝒾𝒸𝓉𝒾𝑜𝓃𝓈 𝑜𝒻 𝒹𝑒𝒶𝓉𝒽, 𝑒𝓉𝒸

𝓢𝓾𝓶𝓶𝓪𝓻𝔂: 𝑀𝒶𝓇𝓀 𝑔𝑒𝓉𝓈 𝒶𝓉𝓉𝒶𝒸𝓀𝑒𝒹 𝑜𝓃 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝓌𝒶𝓎 𝒽𝑜𝓂𝑒 𝓉𝑜 𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝒷𝑜𝓎𝒻𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒹, 𝒥𝑜𝒽𝓃𝓃𝓎

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mark had stayed at the company after hours for the nth time in a row. Sweat had collected on his back, his mind foggy when he even thought of walking home. The moon had shined high when he gave into the thoughts of going. He took a big gulp of water, resting for five minutes and packing up to leave. His legs were sore and bruised and he was only wishing for a hot bath and sleep.

He opened the doors to the outside, looking at the well lit road. He’d made this walk alone plenty of times before, but this time felt different. He had a gut feeling but in his tired and weak state, he ignored it, only thinking of home. He dragged his feet along the pavement, eyes opening and closing. He thought he heard footsteps from behind him but when he moved to check, it was just his shadow. He must be going crazy.

He heard footsteps once more and just to be safe, he took out his phone, sending a message to Johnny, ‘I think someone’s following me’ ‘Help.’ Mark had just sent the last text when the phone in his hand got slapped. It cracked on the floor. His eyes shook as he looked up. A man was there. He shoved Mark to the brick wall, head colliding to the wall. He inhaled from the pain, scrunching his face up, his eyes blinked away tears. He was thrown onto the ground, his cheek getting scraped. “I don’t want any trouble, just give me your money.” The man had a knife that shook from fear.

Mark tried to get away, but he was pushed back down, a searing pain had stung through his back, he fell back down, coughing as tears fell down on the rough ground. He wheezed in a breath that echoed through the alleyway beside them. “Just don’t give me any more trouble,” the stranger said, feeling him up to find a wallet. He didn’t have any money on him besides his cards, “What’s the pin,” the stranger demanded, but Mark’s hearing had started to muffle, black spots entering his vision.

The weight was lifted off of him, a release of a pained breath. Someone helped him. He tried to look to see who it was, the dots in his sight had made his saviour unclear. The person had lifted his head, “Oh shit, Mark, you’re bleeding,” It was Johnny. Mark hummed, Johnny had put pressure on the stab wound. Mark knew that any breath could be his last. If he went out, he’d rather expose his secrets so the other won’t feel bad. “Baby, I love you,” Mark started, “please don’t think this is your fault.”

“No,” Johnny whimpered, “don’t speak like that, I called an ambulance, just hold on, at least for a little bit.” Mark felt wetness from his hazy state, was Johnny crying or was he. He felt out for the elders cheek, his hand shook, Johnny grabbed it, placing it on his cheek. It was him who was crying. “Bubs, don’t cry, it’ll be alright,” Mark said. A muffle of a siren came into range.

“I should be saying that to you, the ambulance is here, please stay with me.” Mark couldn’t, his hand had fallen as well as his eyelids. Johnny watched him go lifeless, eyes closing, he was breathing but that didn’t stop Johnny from worrying. How he wished he could go back and be a good boyfriend for once and pick him up at the building. He watched Mark go to the ambulance, the paramedics mentioned that he should stay home, worried that he’d go into shock. Johnny didn’t like the idea but he didn’t have it in him to argue. It was radio silence for a week, Johnny had gone home, “he’s okay,” he’d say to himself. Soon, the hospital called him, “they’re taking visitors now.”

Johnny stayed outside of the door where Mark stayed. He was nervous, he couldn’t help him, he just sat there as he lay dying. He was useless in the situation. "I'm so glad you’re okay," Johnny admitted, holding his hand once more, it was warmer and so soft, “I was so scared that I lost you.”

“To be honest," Mark confessed, “I don’t remember a lot of that night, all I know is I woke up and here I was, but I do remember one thing,” he raised his head to look straight at Johnny, the elder was listening, “you were there, I remember being scared and when I heard you, I was no longer scared.” “Woah baby, breathe,” Johnny mumbles. “Wait, are you crying?” “It hurts,” Mark whimpers, tears cascading down his cheeks. “The wounds?” Johnny clarifies, confused.

Mark shakes his head harshly, sobs beginning to wrack his body. Johnny looks at his boyfriend, questioningly. “Well then what hurts love?” “Holding on,” Mark cries, even more tears falling. “What do you mean?” Johnny asks worriedly. “It hurts so much to hold on,” Mark whimpers. “Everything in me says to give up.” “Give up?” Johnny repeats, then his eyes widen. “You don't mean…” Mark nods, remorsefully. “I do mean that Love.”

“Baby, I need you,” Johnny exclaims. “Please.” “I'm trying so hard,” Mark sobs. “I promise I am! But I can tell I'm giving up. I know I won't be able to hold on for much longer.” The tall man’s eyes start to fill with tears, not liking how this conversation is going. “I've only ever known... hurt,” Mark mutters. “Until-until-until you... you changed and made me so so happy. That's why I'm still fighting. I want to stay with you so badly. I want to feel loved even more with you.” “Then baby,” Johnny pauses. “Hold- hold on okay? You can do it.” Mark shakes his head painfully.

“Not this time. I'm trying so hard, but I can't. Can I ask you something?” Mark coughs out, slow lungs looking more and more drained. “Anything,” Johnny answers immediately. Mark pauses. “Did I do good?” “Yeah baby,” Johnny nods, tearfully. “You did so good.” Mark smiles, tiredly, then the expression turns dark. “I don't wanna go.” “Baby,” Johnny trails off. “I don't... don't want to go,” Mark repeats. “But I-I-I-I know that... that I have to. I should have... a long t-time ago.” Johnny looks at his boyfriend, hurting. “What do you mean?” Mark winces, eyes shutting halfway. “I broke so long ago. I can't stay anymore. But I want to, I really... I really want to.” Mark looks like he is fighting sleep, but his lover knows what is going to happen.

Tear stained face gazing at his soulmate. “Hey, my love,” Johnny mutters quietly. “You deserve some well earned rest, lovely.” Mark looks up confused. “I'll be okay,” Johnny continues. “Just let go. It's okay. I'm going to be fine.” Mark’s eyes grow more drowsy, but he tries to focus on his boyfriend. “I'll see you soon,” Johnny finishes, heartbroken but giving Mark a sad smile. “Just let go lovely.” “I can go?”

The other nods. “Okay,” Mark nods, absentmindedly. “I'm gonna go to sleep now.” “Good night Mark,” Johnny mutters. He watches as a tiny smile crosses Mark's lips and the pain he’s been feeling seems to slip away. He watches as Mark takes one more breath, before his chest falls still and that's when the heart beat monitor goes off.

#mark lee #johnny suh #nct 127 #mark lee x johnny suh #kpop angst #nct angst #angst #gay #no happy ending #i feel bad #i hate this #johnny suh x mark lee #nct #JOHNMARK #johnny #mark #oneshot #sad #i'm not okay