#// also suffice to say the clothing is extremely basic because I rushed it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jungkooks-left-tiddie · 4 years

Text

I hope you get run by a fucking aeroplane ❤️

Warnings: Mild cursing, Old men being assholes.

Word Count: 2.8k words

Kavya

August 27th, 2020; 6:30pm

New Delhi, India.

"Is the editing for the new manuscript done?" Kavya leaned down to assess the work that was being done.

"It's coming along well, ma'am. Just cleaning up the text." The intern gave her a nervous smile.

"That's good to hear." She said, going through the progress that the editing department had made. "Be sure to crosscheck after you're done editing."

"Yes, ma'am!" Just then, Kavya's secretary came rushing in.

"Ma'am you have a meeting with the Illustration Team in a few minutes," Kavya glanced at her watch and frowned upon realising that she didn't have much time to make it across the building to the main conference room.

"Thank you, Mitra. Just hand me my iPad and I'll be off." Kavya briskly walked to the room where the meeting was meant to be held, greeting the workers passing by.

"Ma'am, the cover design team is ready with their designs," Rachel, the head of the cover design department dressed Kavya.

"Wonderful! I'll ask Mitra to schedule a meeting when I'm free," Kavya paused, glancing at her schedule, "Actually, could you please e-mail it to me?" Rachel smiled gently.

"Of course we can, I'll make sure you get the updated presentation with the notes and all of the other requirements as well."

"Thank you so much; you honestly have no idea how much you've helped me today." Kavya shook her hand and hugged her for a moment.

"Of course. I understand how much stress you're under, the least I could do is help you out!" Rachel smiled yet again.

"Rachel, you're a life-saver and I would love to stay and chat, but I've got to get going to the Illustration Team's meeting,"

"Of course," Rachel made shooing motions with her hands, "Off you go!" Kavya laughed and ran towards the direction of the main conference room.

"Ma'am you're here!" The head of the illustration team, a man in his mid-40's named Mohammad Aamir smiled and shook her hand.

"Thank you very much Mr Mohammad. I'm truly excited to see what you have planned for today."

"Oh I assure you, Ms Agarwal, you will not regret trusting Mr Mohammad's department this time," Two of the workers in the marketing department took their seats as Aamir gestured one of his workers to begin the presentation.

Kavya took out her iPad and started noting down the small changes and corrections that needed to be made. This launch was going to be one of the biggest events in the history of her company and she needed to make sure that everything was immaculate, including the character drawings that would be included in this particular book.

"We initially had a bit of a dilemma deciding what features this character should have; but we managed to get through all of it and decided upon 5 main options," The character designs were on display, impressing Kavya as these were much better than she expected.

"We have also included 5 sub-designs, for a more variety of options," The worker turned to face the board members in the meeting room,

"It's also worth mentioning that we have designed a variety of expressions, postures, and costume; keeping in mind the aesthetic impact and its significance to the storyline,"

"We have constructed the design for the costumes in the locations after carefully studying the different kinds of clothing worn by the locals and also not forgetting the cultural significance of the clothes and accessories," He flipped to the next slide. Kavya was thoroughly impressed until now, but of course, all good things come to an end.

"So as you can see here, the inspiration for the design of the diving gear was inspired by the modern-day swimsuits, focusing especially on the plunging necklines—"

"Pardon my interruption, but why does the diving gear look like a swimsuit? I thought I put special emphasis on the fact that the scene consisted of the characters going scuba diving?" The person presenting the PowerPoint looked uncomfortable under Kavya's piercing gaze.

"Yes, but isn't this what women wear for swimming?"

"They do, but this is what women wear when we're talking about beaches and swimming pools; not when they're going 140 feet underwater. Do you not know what scuba diving is?"

"Yes, ma'am; but actually—"

"Ms Agarwal, are you not overreacting? It's a great marketing point. I mean swimwear is swimwear, am I right?" Gopal Das, a pesky man on the marketing team snickered, clearly proud of his seemingly intelligent statement.

"Mr Das, It seems that your age has dwindled down your common sense. I'm sure all of you present here know that scuba divers have to wear protective gear to make sure they survive the pressure that the water exerts at that deep of a level. I'd like to see you dive in the Bay of Bengal with nothing but your underwear. Should be easy, right?" That seemed to shut the man up, but of course, sexist fuckers are everywhere.

"I agree with Gopal sir, this-" The man said, pointing towards the pathetic excuse for a scuba diving suit, "Is a great attention point. People want this." He crossed his pudgy hands.

"I have said it before and I will say it again," Kavya took a deep breath and looked at them angrily. "I'm not going to compromise knowledge over what you claim are marketing points. I have made it clear time and time again on why design accuracies are important; and I stand by my statements." Kavya tried to convey her point in the most diplomatic way possible, but these two dumbasses were really testing her patience.

"Well, we will not compromise sales to something as trivial as a mere swimsuit,"

"I agree with Mr. Roberts. It seems to me that you are letting your personal experiences get in the way of what could've been a successful launch!" If Kavya was mad before, she was absolutely furious now.

"Mr Das, Mr Roberts, that's enough." The stern voice of Aamir snapped her out of her rage.

"Let me make one thing crystal clear. So as long as you are in this company, you will not promote objectification. It's not that hard to think from the brain and not your genitalia." She glared at the two men.

"To answer your previous statement Mr Das; yes. My experiences are getting in the way. So are the millions of people who constantly face the same issues."

"Do you want to know what I think Mr Das?I think you and Mr Roberts are letting your personal fetishes come in the way of what otherwise was a great illustration. It's honestly not that hard to keep your perverted tendencies to yourself. And if you refuse to follow basic human decency; we'd be extremely glad to find a replacement." She had enough of their boomer heterosexual bullshit.

"Now if you'd excuse me," She gathered her things and exited the room in fury. To think that she had hoped men would change; but as always, they continued to disappoint her (Like they do in bed).

"Ma'am, wait!" The person presenting the PowerPoint came up to her. "I'm sorry for the disappointing design of the diving gear today. I wanted to use a complete different idea, and a much more humane and accurate one, but Gopal sir insisted that I use that for better marketing," He apologised, bowing his head slightly.

"It's ok, uhhhh..."

"Pavan, ma'am."

"Right. It's ok Pavan. I'm glad you are one of the few people in the illustration team with basic human decency. I understand your position, and I'm glad that you approached me. I also first-handedly know how much of a douchebag Gopal is," Kavya smiled slightly, hoping to ease some of his nerves.

"Thank you so much Ma'am! I promise I won't disappoint you next time!" He bowed.

"You better not. I have seen your skills, and you're far too creative and talented to let a person like Gopal boss you around." She patted his shoulder, smiling when he thanked her repeatedly.

"Yes, Ms Agarwal," Aamir walked up to the both of you, looking extremely down, "I apologise for the way Mr Das and Mr Roberts spoke this meeting. It was completely out of line and disrespectful of them. I assure you, if I had known of this issue--"

"Mr Mohammad you don't have to apologise," Kavya smiled at him. "It wasn't your fault, so you must stop blaming yourself. I know those two men disturbed the flow of the meeting, but I stand by my previous comment. Pavan here," She looked at the employee, who was a little flustered, "Had amazing designs up his sleeves and the presentation overall was not bad."

"I think we can definitely improve some of them, but the inspiration, cultural and locational significances were completely accurate," Aamir looked a little bit happier after that statement. "I have noted down the changes that need to be made, and if you could e-mail this presentation to me, I would gladly note them down in the respective areas so you and your team could correct it." Pavan nodded enthusiastically.

"I will send it to you very shortly ma'am."

"Excellent! I'm afraid I must go now," Kavya frowned a little.

"Of course Ma'am. It was an honour talking to you,"

Kavya couldn't be more happier that she that she could finally go home. Those last 30 minutes in the conference room were the most exhausting 30 minutes in the entire month. And suffice to say, she was ready to flop down on her bed and take a much-deserved nap. Of course she knew that she had a shit ton of work to finish before sleeping, but the thought of doing it in the comforts of her home gave her something to look forward to.

"Tired?" Maya Patel, her friend and CEO of Patel Publications, leaned against the doorframe.

"You have no fucking idea," Kavya started packing her stuff, getting ready to leave.

"How was the meeting?"

"The most irritating meeting I've ever been to. Two hours of amazing illustrations and all of that had to come to an end because of two old men's perverted tendencies. 30 minutes of continuous sexism and objectification does things to one's brain."

Maya looked like she'd smelled something nasty. "It was that bitch, Gopal; wasn't it"

"Yes, but this time he had a little minion. It's that other guy you hate, Kevin Roberts."

"Ugh," Maya made a puking face- "I hate them both so much, I always wanted to kick their pathetic asses out. And now my dream is finally coming true!" They laughed.

"But seriously. I am going to fire them. There have been way too many complaints about them in general and I finally have the proof I need."

"Oh when you do fire them, please invite me so I can record that shit in full HD," Kavya walked inside the elevator, Maya following shortly behind.

"No, because you will go on a vacation. That I asked you to go to." Maya crossed her arms.

"More like forced me to go on one," Kavya snorted, but stopped once she noticed the stern expression on Maya's face.

"Ok look, I'll take a vacation when I want to," Kavya made her way to the parking lot where her Kia K5 was parked.

"Besides, you need the new manuscript, right?" She smiled at Maya, who shook her head and smiled lightly.

"I do, but that doesn't mean I don't want you to take a short break. It's concerning how much stress you take up. I just want you to relax"

"Ok, I'll think about it. For now, I just want to go home and take a long nap," Kavya switched on the radio and set out on the road, noticing how most streets were suspiciously empty.

'That's weird,' She thought, 'The streets in Delhi are never empty.' She brushed it off and flipped through the radio stations to find the ones that played old songs, her personal favourite.

The peaceful melodies of the retro songs calmed her on her drive back home. They were the kind of songs that put you in such a trance that you don't know where the time flew by. And of course, very shortly, she parked her car in her buildings allotted parking space.

She greeted the security guard who was on patrol and entered the elevator. After entering the passcode to her apartment, she directly went to the fridge to get some cool water.

Kavya then tossed her blazer and purse aside, ran to the bedroom, flopped on the bed and groaned loudly. Paying no mind that her lipstick would most likely stain the towel she had lain on the bed.

"I better freshen up," She sighed and went to complete her nighttime routine, which just consisted of taking a long hot shower and doing her 7-step skincare routine. After which she folded her clothes and tossed some of them in the washing machine.

A late-night snack was well due, as Kavya did not have her dinner yet; and of course, Red Wine is a must!

"11pm chicken sandwiches are the best," She munched on her sandwich as she scrolled through her twitter to see what her friends shitposted today.

She doubled in laughter over Maggie's posts, nearly choking on lettuce. Eventually she calmed down and filled herself in the news and gossip she's missed out on.

"This is the best time of the day," She told herself as she read the texts she'd received today.

The conversation seemed like it had no end to it, so Kavya skimmed it until she saw herself tagged.

To say that she thought about it would be an understatement. Kavya had no clue for how long she sat there thinking about the road trip before the notification of the email brought her back. She slapped her face a few times to prepare herself for all the work she had to finish.

The entirety of the next 4 hours was spent in Kavya carefully noting down every single detail and making the necessary changes. And soon enough it was 3 am and she was finally done with both the cover design and the character designs. Throughout these 4 hours, however, the only thing on her mind was that road trip idea her friends were talking about.

So she made up her mind. Kavya quickly emailed the corrections she'd made in both the documents. And dialled Maya's number.

"Heyy, Maya? Remember that vacation you were talking about? I'm going to take it."

2 notes · View notes

dxuble-bubble-disco-quexn · 5 years

Text

euphoria | b. urie

where brendon goddamn urie is charlie price, and you’re just the lowly costume designer… or so you thought.

brendon urie x reader

(kinky boots era)

word count : 2.8k

warnings : a rushed-as-hell ending because i didn’t know how to finish it and had zero ideas, i’m sorry

notes : i did really try to make this gender neutral, so if i added any fem/masc pronouns or anything like that, please point them out to me! and to get into the theatre mood, i’ve been listening to hamilton non-stop. (see what i did there-)

{ ! }

“how’s it going there, urie?” you asked nonchalantly, leaning in the doorway of brendon’s dressing room. he was clearly struggling with the laces on the left boot, but knowing him, he would have insisted that he could do it himself until he had to walk out to a crowd of hundreds with one boot and a slipper on. suffice it to say, he was a stubborn bastard.

“all good.” brendon grinned wryly, glancing down at the offending footwear. you arched an eyebrow, and after a moment, he crumbled. “okay, fine,” he amended. “maybe it’s not ‘all good’.” you laughed, mentioning that it was pretty clear before entering the room.

"it's, um, yeah." he said helplessly, motioning at the shoe. you snorted and bent down, lacing up the boot with ease. you had designed it, after all. "thanks," brendon said, grinning at you. you brushed off the praise, merely stating that it was your job, after all.

“also, hey, good luck out there tonight! final show, must be pretty bittersweet, hm?” he laughed as though that was a great understatement. in all fairness, however, it probably was. brendon was extremely charismatic, as expected, and made friends within the cast almost immediately. having to leave them all behind in a week to go back to los angeles? that had to be tough.

“i’ll definitely miss you guys, yeah. you’re lucky that you’ll get to stay with them.” you shot him an inquisitive look and he paused. “what?”

“i’m not staying with the cast. i mean, god, i wish i could, but i’ll be moving on just like you will.” did you just imagine it, or did his face fall for a split second before lifting back up to its normal, playful grin? you shook your head slightly. of course not, you were just overtired,

“well shit, that’s a shame.” brendon said, you glanced up at him in mild bewilderment. “don’t look so surprised, y/n,” he chuckled. “believe it or not, you’re good company.”

a stagehand passed by the door to inform you both that there was 20 minutes until the curtains opened. brendon paled the smallest bit, and you noticed, setting a gentle hand on his arm. “don’t worry,” you reassured. “they’ll love you. and if they don’t, make them.”

brendon snorted. “that almost sounds like a threat.” he pointed out. you shrugged noncommittally and shooed him out the door of his dressing room, reminding him that there was only 15 minutes left and he better go out and kick some metaphorical theatre ass.

{ ! }

he did great. the whole cast did great. everyone did so great and you were doing the nearly impossible task of fighting back tears as you congratulated them all backstage. you had hoped that you were putting on a good mask of joyful pride, but charlie goddamn price just had to see through that one too.

he discreetly gave your hand a little squeeze and you were cursing yourself for the rising blush you could feel high in your cheeks. you were a grown adult, not some silly high schooler holding hands with a crush. wait. did you just compare brendon to a crush? that was completely metaphorical and suddenly brendon’s face was right in front of yours and it would be so easy to kiss him right now and what the actual fuck was happening to your brain.

“hey, um, y/n? you alright?” he asked dubiously. you nod quickly, shaking your head to shoo the obnoxious thoughts away that immediately came back when you looked brendon in the eye, curse his gorgeous face. at the moment all you wanted to do was find the tallest set piece and hurl yourself off of it.

“sorry. you kinda disappeared on me.” he said. you mumbled your apologies and made some lame excuse that you had to go to the bathroom or something. you didn’t really hear yourself, just knowing that you had to get away from all the people and all the noise and, well, brendon.

gasping for air, you made your way to the back parking lot. the cool night air felt fantastic filling up your lungs and pressing against your burning skin. alright. time to take a mental inventory - how did you currently feel? like you desperately wanted to implode. valid. why were you feeling this way? brendon urie was a charismatic, humorous, attractive-as-hell guy and you don’t know how to deal with basic human emotions.

oddly enough, your weird coping mechanisms helped you tremendously, and you were already prepared to go back in there and face your...fears? anxieties? whatever the hell this was.

“y/n!” you hesitated, but luckily it wasn’t brendon - it was ryan, one of the main stagehands in the production. “what’s up? shouldn’t you be at the tear fest, eye-fucking urie like everyone else?” despite his words, you knew ryan felt no envy towards brendon. it was well known that brendon didn’t particularly enjoy the constant eyefucking that just about everyone from the ages of 14-80 gave him on a daily basis. in fact, he liked to joke about it quite a bit.

“screw off, jerk.” you pouted playfully, rolling your eyes skyward as you continued on to the backstage. someone called out to ryan and he bid you farewell, but not before throwing a few playfully sarcastic comments your way.

you and ryan had discovered that you had both gone to the same college just a day after meeting each other, and you had grown quite close bonding over your hatred of a certain hag of a history professor.

you grabbed a glass of wine from the table where they were being served. it wasn’t the afterparty quite yet, no. but this was more pre-gaming in a sense.

you downed half of the glass in one drink and sighed, finally reaching the main bustle of the group. scanning the crowd quickly, you noticed that brendon was off talking to a few members of the ensemble, and didn't seem to be looking for you. that was a relief, but not surprising. you knew that he respected boundaries, and this would be no different.

"hey, y/nnnnn" someone called. you looked around, finding one of your best friends from the cast, jennie, looking back at you with large eyes. "hi,” she said breathlessly. “so like, the entire ensemble is going out for drinks tonight and becks said that you should come too and like everyone agreed with her so like come on!” you paused for a moment, processing her words. jennie had a tendency to do that - talk extremely fast in one breath - when she got excited. you knew there was no point in denying her request, because fuck it, you wanted a drink and who better to do it than with twenty or so grown-up theatre kids?

“why the hell not,” you laughed, “i’ll be right back. gotta grab my bag, meet you right here.” she nodded and you set off to find it. about five minutes later, (the bag evidently did not want to be found, as it had hurled itself off to the darkest corner of the set room), and you were carpooling to the bar with jennie, becks, and a guy who introduced himself as scott.

“so. what’s going on with you and urie?” jennie asked casually, leaning against the driver's seat. you stiffened noticeably.

“what are you talking about?” you retorted with much more bite than intended. jennie however merely raised her eyebrows in amusement.

“don’t even play that with me,” she tutted. “the tension between you two is freaking palpable. don’t even.” you blushed and mumbled something incoherent into the headrest in front of you. “hm?”

“what- what about you and that stagehand? eva?” jennie rolled her eyes and scoffed.

“i asked her out two days ago, she said yes. now don’t change the subject.” you blinked. alright then, you thought. some form of god seemed to be looking down on you that day, as the car pulled into the parking lot of the bar and you jumped out. it was painfully obvious that you were avoiding that topic, but it was far better than talking about it.

you, jennie, becks and scott joined the rest of the ensemble as you raced into the bar like children at an amusement park. there was a good possibility that this experience would end horribly, but in the moment, you were completely up to take that chance.

{ ! }

you flopped onto the bed of your hotel room and sighed. the bedside clock read three am, and you were utterly exhausted. feeling like a total zombie, you dragged yourself off of the soft embrace of your mattress to brush your teeth and change clothes. plugging your phone into the charger, you noticed that you had a text from none other than brendon, sent earlier that night.

“hey, y/n, it’s brendon. i hope you’re okay, i didn’t really see you after you left. but i was wondering if it was cool with you if we could meet tomorrow? i’ll send you the address of the place i was thinking. but i just wanted to ask you a few things about the boots. if you’re busy, don’t worry! it’s fine x - b”

you stared at the message for a moment before taking it in. your sleep deprived brain didn’t react as you normally would - you just sort of mentally shrugged. but you did reply.

“hi, brendon! sure, that sounds good. meet you around 11?” you mentally high-fived yourself for coming up with a reply that looked like it was written by someone not on the verge of dropping their phone on their face and falling the fuck asleep.

and then you did just that.

{ ! }

when you awoke due to the blaring sound of the alarm that you must have set before falling asleep (even though you didn’t remember setting it at all), it was already ten am. cursing softly, you rolled out of bed, straight into a hot shower. you were never one to take hours readying yourself, but you were pretty sure it was record timing as you walked out of your hotel, hair straightened with a full face of makeup on.

it was hardly a ten minute walk to the café - one that seemed even shorter as you were lost in your own thoughts. in fact, you almost walked straight past the unassuming little corner shop on accident.

the small bell next to the door rang softly as you entered. the single room of the café was gorgeous - it was on the smaller side, but the windows and natural light made it look giant yet inviting. you liked this place already.

“hello!” greeted the barista cheerfully, “what can i get for you today?” you placed your order and sat down at one of the raised seats near the front facing window, watching the slow-moving traffic. the barista called your name, and you soon sat back down, drink in hand. you were just about to immerse yourself in your phone when brendon walked in. he smiled over at you, went to place his order, and sat down across the table,

“so, what’s up?” you said, stifling a yawn. brendon chuckled.

“not quite awake yet?” he teased. you scoffed, similarly to jennie the night before.

“don’t avoid the question,” you laughed. “no offense, but why are we here?” he shrugged, suddenly dawning a shy demeanor of that you had never seen him wear. the confident, charismatic brendon urie - shy? surprisingly enough, you could see it. “why do i feel like you lured me here under the false pretenses of talking about my job?” you asked, narrowing your eyes jokingly.

“okay, fine,” he conceded. “maybe i just wanted to talk to you.”

“you know, i would have gladly accepted your invitation even if you did just want to meet up and talk.” you pointed out. brendon flushed and shrugged. “anyway, now that we’re both here, where did you find this place?” that question seemed to spiral into an endless conversation of which you were not complaining. brendon very quickly regained his confidence as the two of you began discussing mutual friends, activities you both enjoyed, and a plethora of other topics as well. you felt like you could talk to him forever.

occasionally the two of you would head up to the counter together to get new drinks, only stopping to place your orders and thank the barista who, by the sly smile on her face, almost definitely thought that you and brendon were a Thing™.

by the time you checked your phone, it was three pm. “four hours,” you said to him in awe as you walked back to his hotel room. (you had blindy agreed to head back there as you had left the coffee shop)

“sure as hell didn’t seem like four hours,” brendon chuckled. you mumbled your agreement beside him as the two of you entered the lobby of the hotel brendon was staying at, coincidentally only a few minutes walk from yours.

the elevator ride was quick and comfortably quiet, as was the walk up to his room. unsurprisingly, it was a bit nicer than yours, but you didn’t mind. it wasn’t like you spent much time in your room those days, anyway.

“dude, you’re hotel room is sweet.” you exclaimed, flopping onto the sofa that faced the window overlooking the new york skyline. brendon blushed faintly and chuckled. you raised an eyebrow at him, but refrained from saying anything.

“want anything to drink? wine, beer, water, we have it all.” he said, walking into the kitchen. you shrugged, saying that water was fine. your attention was stolen by the view from the window, where the glass panes of a nearby skyscraper were glinting rainbow in the sunlight.

“hello?” brendon laughed, setting a water bottle on the table in front of you and sitting down. you blinked and looked over at him.

“sorry about that,” you blushed, “the view is gorgeous here.” brendon agreed quietly and the two of you sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes. finally, you broke it.

“what are you going to do next? another album?” you asked. brendon shrugged, sipping his beer.

“maybe, i don’t know. i’ve been thinking of a few songs, but not a whole albums-worth.” you nodded, murmuring your understanding.

“don’t worry! i get that, and-” you cut yourself off. “you have a balcony?!” you gasped in excitement. brendon laughed and nodded, making a motion for you to lead the way, seeing as you had already jumped off of the couch.

the view from the balcony was indescribable. what with the gentle wind from being up so high, it felt like you were at the literal top of the world. even the skyscrapers seemed to shrink below you, and the clouds seemed just too far away to touch. it was euphoric.

“sorry for acting like a child,” you said nervously, not tearing your eyes away from the soaring view of the city spread out below. “i just- i’ve always loved views like this. they’re so…” you trailed off, not able to describe the feeling. brendon made a soft sound of understanding beside you.

“don’t worry, y/n,” he grinned. “excitement looks cute on you.” did he just…? no, you thought. he couldn’t be flirting with you. but as your brain went into over-analysis mode, a thought popped into your head. he was totally flirting with me. that smooth motherfucker. brendon had stayed comfortably silent throughout this whole realization, and you wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of watching you mentally fall apart before him. though, it was either that or act like you possessed the iq of a plastic houseplant, and neither of those options sounded particularly desirable.

“and everything looks cute on you, urie.” fuck, that slipped out. guess we’ll see what he does with that. he certainly looked taken aback, but regained his composure quickly. that’s right, two can play at this game.

however, the “game” did not last as long as you had previously assumed. brendon made sure of that.

“you’re making it really hard not to kiss you, y/n.” he grumbled. your stomach did a little flip at his words, and your eyes widened. you didn’t even attempt to mask your surprise this time.

“personally, i recommend that you do it then,” you smirked. brendon blinked, and before either of your realized it, your lips were on his.

with the wind blowing around the two of you, and the entirety of new york city sprawled out below as your lips moved in sync, you formed a single coherent thought. this is it, you sighed in contentment. this is euphoria.

#brendon urie #brendon urie x reader #brendon x reader #beebo #p!atd #panic! at the disco #fanfic #writing #patd #that ending is just pure ew

63 notes · View notes

bemused-writer · 5 years

Text

The Cain Saga Volume 3 - Kafka

Before we get into this volume I just want to let you all know that I had it all written already and then my computer crashed. Thus, this is the rewrite but hopefully it will be better than what came before. 8D

Also, typical warning for the series: it is rated “Explicit” for its themes. Please bear that in mind as you read the review. Also, there are just tons of spoilers here. For my previous reviews, you can find Volume 1 here and Volume 2 here.

The next thing I want to talk about is the glory of this volume cover:

Look at how exceptionally 90s this thing is. The baggy clothes, the overabundance of wrinkles, the broad shoulders, the poses. It’s incredible. There is the slight problem that, if I didn’t know this story took place in the 19th century, I would probably just assume it took place in the 90s or possibly even the 80s. It has a very Anne Rice vibe to it.

Speaking of Anne Rice, those streams of blood on Cain aren’t just for decoration: vampires are very much our theme this volume. As a brief analysis of the cover (outside of its 90s glory) I will point out that while Cain has been bitten by a vampire (a physical representation of corruption or lost innocence) he is also wearing a cross, indicative of an attempt at preventing this from happening on his part. Yet despite his efforts at keeping himself pure he is still brought back to his curse.

A minor thing: in The Cain Saga Cain is shows as having light brown hair for the most part, or at least light brown highlights. This changes in Godchild where he’s almost exclusively shown as having black hair. This is probably just a stylistic change but we could also interpret it as his life getting darker the further he goes.

And finally, a note on the title of the volume, “Kafka.” I haven’t talked about this at all in the previous two reviews, but each volume has a loose theme. In the first one it was “Forgotten Juliet,” a reference to Suzette who tried to win over her Romeo (and failed). The second volume’s theme is nursery rhymes, which is used primarily to demonstrate the loss of innocence and a corrupted childhood. This volume references Franz Kafka, who was known for his surrealist writings that included themes of losing one’s humanity and things of that nature.

And now into the volume itself. I talked a bit about how Riff is someone Cain trusts implicitly in the last volume and the beginning of this one goes out of its way to reiterate that once more. Upon waking up from a nightmare about his father where he’s led to freedom by someone’s hand, wondering whose it could be we see this:

The implication being it’s Riff that leads him out of darkness and back to the light. However, there’s someone to the left trying to overshadow him, and that’s something that this volume really takes a look at: What if Riff wasn’t so trustworthy? What if someone tried to take his place?

The doctor, who introduces himself as “Allen” but who we will refer to as Disraeli because that’s who he is immediately inserts himself into Cain’s life and insists he needs to go to the countryside to restore his health. I’ve always enjoyed this bit of Victorian advice. Have you been ill for weeks? You need to breathe some better air. Honestly, that was probably somewhat true all things considered; smog was a force to be reckoned with.

Disraeli tries to assist Cain with his clothes but he refuses and Mary Weather considers this:

We already know from the previous volume that Cain bears horrible scars on his back from his father’s beatings. This is something he does his hardest to hide from everyone, including Mary Weather. The only person he doesn’t make any attempt to shun in this regard is Riff, who already knows all about it.

Cain ultimately goes to the countryside just as Disraeli suggested and one thing I’m happy to see is how much Cain cares about his little sister, Mary Weather.

Cain has a lot of iffy moments in the series where you really question his opinions and mindset but I’m happy to report that his relationship with Mary Weather is always a source of happiness and remains untainted by all the other crazy things that go on around him (as much as that’s possible, that is).

The trip to the countryside quickly goes awry when night falls when Cain discovers a woman who can only be described as a vampire:

Even as he manages to escape her, he’s attacked by an unidentified assailant upon reaching home whom he leaves a scratch on.

And this is where we start to see why Riff’s honesty is being questioned this volume. Was he the one who attacked Cain at night? Who is the vampire?

Personally, I got a kick out of reading Kaori Yuki’s author’s notes on fan reactions to all of this. Apparently, Disraeli was not popular and she was confused as to why everyone was judging him so harshly when he hadn’t done anything wrong. (This is even more amusing when we get to the end only to discover fans were right.) Furthermore, Riff fans were apparently very unhappy with him being “replaced” with Disraeli and that Riff was being portrayed in a negative light whatsoever. It sounds like Yuki had her hands full with keeping fans content. XD

Fans were also unhappy with Cain’s “player” tendencies this volume (there were some dissatisfied readers! XD). The next morning, Cain meets a boy named Dirk who owns Witherby Castle and swiftly meets his sister, Justine, as well. Turns out, Justine looks exactly like the vampire from the other night. The only difference is that while the vampire was bloodthirsty and appeared to be something of a seductress, Justine is sweet and innocent.

I don’t think there’s a single reader who believes she’s actually innocent of the whole affair and that it’s only made more difficult when you realize she’s so delicate she can’t bear to look at mirrors or be under the sun.

...Yeah, sounds like a vampire.

Cain thought so, too, and decided to test his theory in such a way that led to the fan complaints I mentioned earlier:

She doesn’t immediately try to murder him or drink his blood. She has a very bashful reaction instead, so we can safely assume she is not a vampire (except no one is assuming that).

Cain notes she had a faint scar on her face, which doesn’t completely match the vampire from before. Half of her face had suffered extreme burn marks, so once again there is some difference between Justine and the vampire from before.

He promises to meet her again but I personally think the above panel has Cain looking a great deal more like how he’ll look in Godchild, which is the main reason I’ve included it.

At any rate, her brother is outraged at what Cain has done and immediately asks his sister whether they’ll be together forever or not with an insistence that can only be described as “odd.”

I think I’ve mentioned before in my VNC reviews somewhere that vampires are basically always used to explore something forbidden, especially when it comes to love and this story is no exception. I will point out that Yuki doesn’t really need an excuse to explore forbidden love, but having vampires involved increases the chances that she will by a lot. Needless to say, we’re about to get into some uncomfortable territory.

We see Riff behaving oddly once more by discarding Mary Weather’s hat. He rushes home, she’s fine, but he and Riff have a revealing conversation:

Now, I’m just going to let you all know that they are both, technically, acting right now. They both suspect Disraeli, but they’re going along with things and they’re putting on a performance to make it look like Cain is losing faith in Riff.

However, the amount of truth in this statement as well as the relevance of it all in Godchild is immense. I’ll get more into that when we actually reach Godchild but suffice it to say for now that Cain relies on Riff to an almost unhealthy degree and if anything truly threatened that we would see something very different from this.

Also, I just want to point out once more that you can really see some parallels between Cain and Riff with Ciel and Sebastian from Kuroshitsuji. I would genuinely be shocked if Toboso hadn’t read this series previously. There are some noteworthy differences though: Ciel and Sebastian have a far more confrontation relationship where the master/servant dynamic is largely a facade. Sebastion will win in the end, after all, so in many ways they’re equals but there’s no love lost between them, no matter how much Ciel relies on him and orders him to never lie. With Cain and Riff things are a lot softer: it’s a relationship built on genuine trust and affection but the master/servant dynamic is also a great deal more real as well. Riff is a servant and Cain is an aristocrat. It’s hard to separate them from their roles unlike with Sebastian and Ciel. Still, Cain’s need for Riff to be there and to be loyal to him is just as genuine as Ciel’s.

Getting back to the volume at hand, Justine and Mary Weather prove to be fast friends and suddenly Cain and co. are moving into the castle. Needless to say, Dirk is furious. Furthermore, the amount of people being attacked by that vampire is only increasing and paranoia is mounting.

Disraeli himself sees something strange:

Riff appears to be with a vampiric woman himself. Disraeli thinks of how terrifying her eyes are and proceeds to find Cain, telling him of what he saw. Cain refuses to believe Riff would ever betray him (understandably given he’s in on it) but the exchange he and Disraeli share is important:

The meaning behind what Disraeli is saying is extremely layered. On the first, he’s accusing Riff of being untrustworthy and of that he’s not looking after Cain out of the goodness of his heart but out of something far more malicious. On the second, Disraeli is referring to what he himself is doing: he’s getting closer and closer to Cain, Cain is “trusting” him, and doesn’t realize he’s only there to bring more pain. The third layer is by far the most nefarious and is only truly revealed in Godchild, so I won’t discuss it here just yet.

Cain goes to meet with Justine once more, gives her an earring (one that the vampire had dropped previously, I believe) and departs but her brother, Dirk, is in high dudgeon and it’s revealed that he loves Justine and is jealous of how interested she is in Cain. She refuses him and he says, “Have you really forgotten that night? I was the one who protected you from Father!” He follows up with, “It’s not fair! You forget everything in the daytime, Justine!”

We’re finally starting to sort out what is going on here. Their father has been mysteriously absent, there are rumors of a vampire who was burned at the stake, and there had been a fire earlier on.

Things come to a head with Riff and Cain dismisses him from his employ. He then finally meets the vampire once again, who claims her name is Gertrude.

She notes that his eyes mark him as someone who is just as cursed as they and she offers him eternal life. If he’s going to be cursed, why not get to live forever? And Cain is tempted by the idea. We don’t get to see what his ultimate decision would have been as Disraeli bursts in and chases her away with a cross.

Still, I can’t help but wonder. I don’t think Cain would have accepted. He despises himself for his cursed lineage and views his own existence as a sin. In order to prolong his life in the way Gertrude is suggesting he would have to kill more and more people, thus making his life even more cursed than it was before. I don’t think he could bear that, and so I think he would have refused her.

Afterwards he’s comforted by Disraeli and they have another layered conversation:

On one hand, Cain is telling the truth. He doesn’t like people seeing through him and it’s part of why he goes to such pains to conceal how much pain he endures. But he’s also not being wholly honest; he’s nearly always allowed Riff the privilege of both these things. As for Disraeli, he’s also being honest about watching Cain, but it’s hardly out of the caring concern of a doctor.

Meanwhile, Mary Weather is confronting Riff about leaving. She insists if he only asked, Cain would take him back. That is certainly true if he were actually leaving. But Riff needs to make his departure convincing and so this is what he tells Mary Weather: “Until now I’ve been everything for Lord Cain. I was his mother and his father. We’ve strengthened our bond without even using words.”

He’s laying it pretty thick here but there’s still a lot of truth to it. There would have to be in order for it to be even slightly convincing. Riff is everything to Cain as we’ve talked about before. He’s been there when no one else was. Without him, Cain would be lost.

When Cain next meets with Justine, she begs him to take her away because her brother is looking at her with evil eyes. Cain’s response is a little, uh, not helpful:

Here’s the thing, Cain is not the right person to be talking to about this. He has no idea what a normal relationship even is and as far as he’s concerned, running off with him is not freeing yourself from a cursed relationship.

It would be easy to say he’s thinking of his father and the incestuous relationship he had with his sister that led to Cain’s birth but this appears to be on a different level. Cain isn’t in the habit of defending his father’s horrendous choices in life.

After Dirk reveals the truth of Justine to her (which we’ll talk about momentarily) he and Cain discuss things and it becomes clear why Cain was so particular about what Justine said:

It turns out Suzette wasn’t simply his cousin. I’ll be honest, I completely forgot that tidbit. All I can say is that it’s been awhile since I read this...

At any rate, Cain is admitting he is in no position to be judging Dirk. However, the fact that Cain thinks he’s as bad as his father goes to show how deep his self-loathing is and how much he isn’t considering the entirety of the situation because it honestly isn’t the same. 1) Cain had no idea Suzette was his half-sister until after she’d died. Alexis knew perfectly well what he was doing. 2) Alexis forced himself on Augusta. Cain did no such thing to Suzette.

Cain’s love for Suzette is better likened to Oedipus than to Alexis: he tried really hard to avoid incest but the gods (Yuki) just wouldn’t let him live in peace.

Cain also says “It’s no use. If I’m not related by blood to the woman I’m not capable of loving her. I don’t know how to love.” He declares that he and Dirk both need salvation.

The thing is, Cain doesn’t actually know this for a fact. He’s had multiple flings but he’s never actually stayed in a relationship where he’s in love and his partner loves him in turn. He’s despairing and thinks he knows how things have to be but the fact is he doesn’t.

Honestly, the lack of Riff in this volume becomes pronounced around this point. There’s no one there to try to offer an alternative explanation to Cain or to try to get him to look at things from a different angle. He’s left to his own devices and that means he reaches the worst conclusions possible.

Anyway, going back to what Dirk revealed, it turns out their stepfather had been abusing Justine and had put her through some kind of dark ritual in an attempt to bring Gertrude to life. In other words, another personality was superimposed over her own.

What I don’t like about this is how the narrative kind of frames this as Justine’s fault. She was the one who manipulated Dirk into killing their stepfather (rather understandably, I’d say!) and she was supposedly the one who seduced Dirk. Furthermore, it’s implied she was the one in control of their stepfather as well. Dirk definitely accuses her as if it’s her fault and Cain doesn’t exactly help. Of course, Cain’s perspectives are so skewed as to be useless in this situation, so...

Regardless, it’s implied that she was never a vampire (which I suppose I could believe) but that this was her true self coming through (which I find much harder to believe).

Ultimately, she and her brother burn to death after she goes on a rampage. It’s hard not to feel bad for both of them despite the awkward way this whole thing has been framed. They were both abused by their stepfather and never given a chance to remake their lives. They were trapped from start to finish.

Cain is understandably upset but when Disraeli comes to “comfort” him it’s revealed at long last what he really is: a soul catcher from Delilah. He also reveals he was the one who set the whole thing up along with their stepfather:

Just as Disraeli goes to remove Cain’s eyes, Riff finally makes his reappearance and everything comes to light once and for all:

They “kill” Disraeli and learn a few things from him as well:

Alexis is still alive and Delilah is an organization he’s a part of. Cain tells Riff never to leave him again and we get an idea of just how hard this has been. He’s been without Riff for a long period of time now and he’s witnessed two siblings die during it.

On a lighter note, I enjoyed seeing Riff explain to Mary Weather how he was lying:

Up till now I would have assumed he had no sense of humor but clearly I was mistaken. XD He’s teasing her terribly! It’s also revealed that the vampire Riff had been with earlier had been Cain the whole time, which makes things a lot more amusing as well. Lastly, it’s revealed Disraeli survived, which isn’t all that surprising.

Anyway, that wraps the volume up, and what a volume it was! Rather than tackle multiple short stories, this one had one big story! I enjoyed that it was one story that tackled a lot of things relevant to the plot but there were a few points that could have been smoothed out, notably how harshly everyone was in judging Justine compared to Dirk. The other thing I really wish we got more of is who Suzette was as a person. She only showed up in a singular chapter, but she’s having a profound impact on Cain himself. I think we needed to learn a lot more about her.

The Kafka reference is also a little clearer: neither sibling felt human anymore and Cain hasn’t for a while now. While it’s too late for Dirk and Justine, it isn’t yet for Cain. Perhaps we will see him make some progress in the next two volumes.

#cain saga #count cain #godchild #Bemused's post #long post #manga review

22 notes · View notes

youremyplayground · 5 years

Text

This Isn’t It Chapter 5

“What should we do?” Hakyeon asked, his arm around my waist.

“Well..getting her memories back will be a stressful and painful experience. Some patients pass out every time they remember anything. I suggest someone being with her at all times just in case she loses consciousness again. And you said you have to leave to do some business, correct?” Jin asked, his legs were crossed and his hands folded neatly on top of them.

“I won’t be back for 2 weeks. I’ll just take her with me.”

“I would prefer if you left her here, where I would be able to keep an eye on her progress.”

“Well then what do you suggest?” I could see Hakyeon getting more and angrier.

I stayed silent, my mind was still reeling from what I remembered. It terrified me to even meet Hakyeon’s eyes. Ever since I woke up, I did my damndest to not have to look into them. I know that before whatever happened, I was in love with him. Those feelings hadn’t returned. If anything they were replaced by sheer terror.

“Is there anyone you trust enough to leave her with?”

“I trust all our boys. They’re all good kids.”

“Alright, then..how about Wonho? She probably trusts him the most at this moment in time. Is that correct?” Jin asked, looking at me.

“Y..yes.” Honestly, I didn’t trust any of them. Now that I knew what kind of people they were. All I could picture was all the blood on their hands. They acted like Wonho and I being beaten to a pulp was a normal thing. They didn’t seem too surprised. And Wonho’s little brother is allowed to just stroll in here no problem? How did he not figure out what they were doing? More importantly, how was he safe?

“Okay, that settles it. Wonho will be her guardian, you’ll take care of your business and I’ll make sure she doesn’t have an aneurysm.” Jin said with a wide smile.

Even though it was meant to be a joke, neither I or Hakyeon laughed. Jin cleared his throat awkwardly. Nodding to himself, he turned to his computer before opening a Word document and started quickly typing away. My mind drifted once again to what I remembered. Jaebum.I guess he was my friend? And he betrayed me? If what Daehyun said what true, then that means Jaebum had to betray me to protect his family. How could I be mad over that? Especially when I was a criminal.

“Okay, uh…you haven’t told us her name,” Jin said, looking up from the document and looking at me and Hakyeon. I looked over at Hakyeon as well and saw he had a glint to his eyes that looked like he was deep in thought. As much as I was uncomfortable with his arm around me, I had to keep up the act that I was willing to be close to him. Who knows if I didn’t, he may kill me. Tapping his knee, I brought him back into the room where Jin laughed at his expression and repeated the question.

“Oh! It’s Haeun.” Hakyeon said, rubbing my side.

I fought to jump against his touch, taking in my name. I thought that my name would sound familiar to me if I had ever heard it, but..it didn’t. It sounded like any other name. Furrowing my eyebrows I let it sink in but felt nothing. It was just as strange to me as any of the men I’ve met today.

Suddenly, the door opened and the same man who slapped Wonho earlier walked in as Jin continued to type on his computer. He had a terrifying aura around him. Almost like the air itself dropped to freezing temperatures as it touched him. My heart beat immediately began to race as he walked over. His eyes didn’t leave the ground until he was next to Hakyeon where they slowly looked up and flicked over my face then to Hakyeon’s.

“Leo, what is it?”

“Everything is packed. We’re ready when you are. Just let me know if there’s anything you need last minute.”

“No, I’m fine. Ah, send in Wonho.” Hakyeon said, not looking up at the man. His voice took on a deep tone to it. It was quite intimidating. So this is the boss everyone knows. Why is he so different in front of me, Key, and Jin?

“Right away, sir. Also, miss. I apologize for not saying anything to you earlier.” Leo bowed before walking out of the room. The room seemed to return to its original temperature as soon as he left.

A couple minutes and lots of typing from Jin later, Wonho limped into the room. He looked a little more bruised since I last saw him. The slap from Leo must’ve really hurt. He avoided everyone’s eyes and went instead straight to Hakyeon’s side and bowed. This man has everyone terrified and I was in love with him?

“As you know, a couple of us have to leave for 2 weeks. We caught onto a tip that Daehyun is vacationing up north. We are going to try and take him out, but we don’t want to rush it. You know how it is. Jin here said that he wants someone to be with Haeun at all moments in case something like this happens again. I want that person to be you. You up for it?”

Wonho lifted his head and flitted his eyes over us, surprise covered his face. Had he never gotten an assignment like this before? Come to think of it, why hadn’t anyone else in the gang even know about me? Did we hide my identity from the entire gang? How?

“Yes, sir. I won’t let anything happen to her, sir.”

“Alright well, I suggest we start anew. The pictures in your penthouse overwhelmed her so I suggest she lives in one of the other ones for now. The memories when they do come back could be too much. Plus we don’t want to stress her out more by constant reminders of things she can’t remember,” Jin said, grabbing a sheet of paper he printed. “It’s good to try and get back into a routine. You also need lots of bed rest. Try to take a good portion of this week just relaxing and let your body heal. Take these pills whenever you have a headache or if your hip starts to act up. I should’ve given them to you earlier, but you make it easier when you came down here again.” He winked at me.

“Hey now, flirt,” Hakyeon warned, a smile on his face.

“Wonho, I want you to make sure she doesn’t overexert herself. She looks like she’s having a hard time standing or her face gets really pale, make her sit down and get her whatever she needs. It’s important to heal before trying to regain lost memories. This other part is exercises to do later in the week. They may help. I want to see you back here on Sunday, however, if you suddenly feel like you remember something or if you feel something is wrong with your body, I want you to come here right away. Don’t push it off.” He handed the paper to me.

Suddenly a flash of me grabbing a paper and folding it then putting it in my back pocket popped through my mind. I ignored it and bowed towards Jin. Hakyeon’s phone started to go off, but he ignored it and helped me stand up. Pecking me on the cheek, he pulled me into a hug.

“I’ll be back soon okay?” He said before walking out of the room.

“Follow me, miss,” Wonho said, bowing. I bowed once again to Jin before folding the paper and stuffing it into my back pocket.

Looking down at my clothes I realized just how dirty and tattered they were. Wonho seemed to too. He bit his lip before looking around and seeing Hakyeon not too far away. He lightly jogged best he could over to him.

“Ah, sir, what do we do about her clothes?”

“Oh right! Hmm...Jin said not to surround her with her old stuff. So send Bam on a trip and buy her new stuff. I’ll text him her sizes.”

A couple hours passed and I sat on the couch in a penthouse remarkably similar to the one I supposedly shared with Hakyeon, except this one was basically empty furniture wise. It had the necessities. Apparently, this was used by a former member who mysteriously disappeared during a mission. That’s a normal thing around here I guess.

I tried my best to not be as awkward around Wonho. It’s not his fault I was completely terrified by anything and everything. He was trying pretty hard to keep the chitchat happening so that the stretches of silence weren’t too deafening. I appreciated that, honestly. We talked about him, his brother, how he got into this, why he stayed.

It was pretty heartbreaking to hear about how he loved his brother so much that he’d die just to have him not know what kind of work he did. To not have him end up going down the same road that he did. The boy apparently was an extremely talented dancer. Wonho was hoping he’d be in a boy group one day but knew that wouldn’t be able to happen. Not with the kind of trouble his brother gets into. People would find out in an instant.

As the night came to a close I did begin to feel a little closer to Wonho. I was just happy Hakyeon didn’t leave me with Woozi. I really would’ve lost my mind with him. He was just TOO calm. Like he’d seen death and just stared it in the face way too many times. I just hope I won’t have to be strapped into that chair again. I’d rather go back to that damn warehouse. At least they showed emotion, even if it was anger.

“Well, you should probably go to bed. It’s been one hell of a day for you.” Wonho said from the other side of the couch, standing up slowly. He was just as sore as I was. “And judging from you passing out twice today, I think its suffice to say you’re exhausted.”

He held out his hand to me to help me up. I took it and stood up, making my way to the master bedroom. It was a gorgeous seafoam green color with accents of cream. Much like the rest of the penthouse. The windows were all covered long ago. Just because the gang used an office building as a headquarters doesn’t mean they were stupid. Apparently, they had a shooter climb up an old building and shoot everyone inside a room.

“Where will you sleep?” I asked Wonho, sitting down on the bed.

“In the living room, keeping an eye on the door. The only point of entry.”

“Oh..okay.”

“Goodnight, Miss Haeun.” He smiled.

“Goodnight..”

#Monsta X #B.A.P #BAP #vixx #exo #astro #bts #SHINee #got7 #youremyplayground

0 notes