#Also i SWEAR I’m not dead

[monkayemporor]

fem!reader threesome with kainess brainrot

teehee

thinking about ALEXIS NESS being sandwiched between MICHAEL KAISER and his pretty girl. You’re laying on the bed, legs spread as Ness thrusts in and out of you, all while Kaiser, keeping a firm grip on his teammate’s waist, fucks him dumb.

and let’s not forget you!! You and your pretty tits! Michael can’t help fondle them—caressing your adorable strech marks and squeezing the fat tits!

Poor Ness, though! Getting absolutely destroyed by his emperor all while your pretty little cunt is a holding tightly on his poor dick!

in the end, you and Kaiser are practically glowing after a good couple rounds but little Ness is laying on the bed—all fucked out and simply exhausted.

but god, he’ll do it all over again just for his emperor and empress.

#blue lock x reader #michael kaiser x reader #alexis ness x reader #blue lock smut #michael kaiser smut #alexis ness smut #Been thinking about this for a while #Also i SWEAR I’m not dead #But my university just sucked my dick so hard #That I died #😔😔😔

[comradekatara]

very sinister to me whenever i see posts that are like “it’s so cute/romantic how zuko is a dick to every member of the gaang except for [the one op happens to ship him with]!” first of all, the notion that “a troubled guy who is rude to everyone but you” is somehow a sweet romantic ideal is just eminently problematic. no one should want a boyfriend (or girlfriend, or partner of any kind) who is an asshole to all your friends and loved ones and everyone they’ve ever met, even if they’re the sweetest kindest cuddliest person when you’re alone. that’s just an obvious red flag. but also, it’s not even true?? zuko treats every member of the gaang like shit at some point during the latter half of book 3, even if he is also (somewhat) nice to them at other points. he yells at katara about “how unfair it is that she doesn’t trust him yet” (it’s not. it’s totally deserved), he brusquely dismisses toph’s feelings when she tries to open up to him about her childhood trauma, he basically mocks and belittles aang for clinging to the remnants of his culture that zuko’s direct forefathers literally wiped off the planet (which he does in multiple episodes, btw), he exploits sokka’s photographic memory for his own ends after interrupting his date to force him to recount one of the most traumatic days of his entire life like sokka is just there to be his genius butler or something, and he mostly just seems to pretend that suki doesn’t even exist. this also goes for every other character btw, including mai, ty lee, jin, song, jet, or whomever else you may ship him with. the only character zuko is consistently nice to is that kid lee from “zuko alone,” bc he’s healing his inner child or whatever. so romanticize the fact that zuko is inexplicably good with kids all you want, but when it comes to dating, i actually think zuko should take a vow of abstinence for at least the next decade or so.

#zuko #hot takes #okay….. listen…… #I SWEAR I don’t hate zuko #it feels like all my posts abt him lately are just tearing into the poor guy ruthlessly #but I’m not a zuko hater!!!! that is my son actually #it just bothers me (a lot) how much ppl are willing to whitewash him for whatever personal agenda they may have #so it’s not that I don’t love zuko #it’s just that I don’t love zuko MORE than I love the other characters #the selective memory and defensiveness when it comes to zuko fans is just. astounding. like cmon now #also I do believe in volcel zuko like I am dead srs abt that #technically it’s more nuanced than that but like. that’s truly the gist of it #hashtag free mai hashtag let my girl live #etc etc

[youngyoo-apologist]

OG Choi Han they could never make me hate you cause if some random rich boy was yelling at me and telling me my family deserved to die like a day after it happened and all I wanted was to know how I could get help I’d beat him up too

This plus the added fact that the Harris Village people were the first people to take Choi Han in and take care of him after years and years in the dark forest. Like he’s obviously not going to be mentally stable after all that, and he was so young when everything happened to him like I cannot blame him at all. I don’t think I can ever hate OG Choi Han like ever, he’s flawed, he has problems, but I love him dearly. He deserves the world. This kid who had to fight for his life, was taken away from his family, and in the process had to give up parts of his own humanity to survive, and like went to war two years later, they could never make me hate u OG Choi Han…

Like yeah violence is bad I guess but OG Cale had it coming(saying this as an OG Cale fan, I love him, but he was mean as hell when he was younger!)

If I’m honest, I think they were both in the wrong to an extent. Like OG Cale shouldn’t have said all that no matter the circumstances, and OG Choi Han shouldn’t have beaten him up so much. But u say mean shit and you get hit, that is how it will work when you’re talking to the guy who just saw his entire village get murdered like idkkkk man

I understand where OG Cale was coming from, but he had many issues and while he wasn’t an awful person, he was capable of doing bad things because of his own internalized pain and emotions that he never got to properly process because of his emotionally distant childhood and relationship with his father who should have been there for him more when he was younger.

Okay speaking of his childhood, Deruth isn’t the WORST father in the world but there are a lot of things he could have done better. I think a lot of Deruth’s flaws come from his fear of failure and messing up. He’s scared of doing the wrong thing, and so he sticks to doing what he knows and using what he knows best. That’s why he uses his money, that’s why gift giving is his way of showing affection, he knows that it is one thing he cannot mess up.

The problem is that money and gifts is NOT what OG Cale needed. I think what that guy needed the most was a parent who wasn’t afraid to talk to him, to ask him questions. Not to say that Deruth gave up on OG Cale, but I think in a way he gave up on OG Cale by giving up on himself. Deruth didn’t trust himself to have the capabilities to talk to OG Cale, which is why he never did. It’s because that Deruth was scared, and didn’t trust himself, that he could never face OG Cale

If Deruth was able to trust himself a little more, and pull himself together, I don’t think OG Cale would have turned out the way he did. As a kid, he probably thought the only way he could help his family without relying on anyone(no doubt this whole ‘I have to do it myself’ thing came from the fact that he couldn’t rely on his father when his mom died, and instead was acting as a pillar of support for his father when it should have been the other way around) was to sabotage himself, the only heir. If he was shown to be unfit to be heir, then everyone else would have no choice but to direct their hatred towards him instead of his family.

If Deruth had talked to his son at least ONCE when he was a kid, asking him why he was upset or why he did the things he did, I think OG Cale would have told him. Why? Because he’s a kid!! A kid will obviously want to rely on his father, if he just had one sign telling him that he didn’t have to do it alone I’m 90% sure OG Cale would have said something.

Basically, while Deruth isn’t the worst father, he’s not really a great father either. I think he does do his best, but he has issues with communication lol

OG Cale and OG Choi Han are both complex characters and had their own reasons to behave the way they did. The thing is with people is that they’re complicated and have layers, so the situation with them would have layers behind it as well with multiple co-existing truths and stuff

#guys I’m a big fan of Choi Han #and I get sad when people bring up this scene and all the blame is on him #like okay he was wrong but if YOU saw your entire family dead and some random rich boy started yelling abt how their lives were worthless #you’d be mad too no? #like his feelinsg were totally justified cause OG Cale was REALLY mean in that scene #‘their lives are worth less than the bottle in my hand’ OHHHHH OKAY OG CALE THATS ENOUGH THATS ENOUGHHHH #I love OG Cale but u have to admit he wasn’t very nice when he was younger #like the statements ‘he had his reasons’ ‘being trash was an act’ ‘he wasn’t a bad person’ ‘but he did say bad things’ can co exist #yes being trash was an act but he is ALSO capable of saying mean things and things that are wrong #LIKE TELLING THE GUY WHO JUST GOT HIS FAMILY MURDERED THAT THEIR LIVES WERE WORTHLESS #HE WAS NOT INNOCENT FOR THAT #Younger OG Cale is not a black and white character #and neither is older OG Cale but this post isn’t abt him #okay I’m gonna bring up someone who isn’t from TCF #but take Eunyung Baek from no home as an example okay #eunyung did bad things and was a bad person because of his childhood right #the reasons to being a bad person do not take away the bad things he did #but just cause he did bad things and was capable of them did not mean he could not change #I love OG Cale a LOT and I just think that his character has a lot behind it #Older OG Cale is obviously very different from his younger self #years and years of war and tragedy have matured him and like he’s not the same person he was anymore #okay back to Choi Han I love that guy I will defend him with my life #beating up people is wrong yeah but with the circumstances I’d say OG Cale had it coming #like okay it would be different if it was unprovoked but it was very much provoked #I swear I love OG Cale I just think he was very wrong for that #not to say he can’t change or isn’t capable of change he definitely is #idk I guess my point is that OG Cale was wrong but he changed as a person #and OG Choi Han was wrong for beating him up so much but it wasn’t unjustifiable #tcf #lcf

[inchidentally]

Hmm, it's clear that Lando prefers the company of his former teammates over his current teammate.

like I know it’s only a certain percentage of ppl in carland* and dand* but every time I see smth like this I’m grateful landoscar fandom doesn’t do the whole 2012 fandom thing of “real life girlfriends are all PR or beards and every Lando friendship is in competition w each other bc he is the designated girl insert of heteronormative yaoi ships and girls can’t just be friends w guys” bullshit

bc y’all are going to d*e of stress at age 33 atp

it also makes me wanna say Martin Garrix’s name three times just to have him appear like the final boss of Lando rpf ship wars

#inchreplies #but wait isn’t this proof maxi*l is canon again ?? does this mean g*lex is dead ?? #also the fact that Lando is actually close to Max V and spends way more time w him than any other driver yet they’re not a ship ?? #sorry I’m in a shit stirring mood ashavsjdbjs #how exhausting must it be to engage in fandom like this I swear

[carapacian-swag]

if i was wayward vagabond, and having the things that happened to him in homestuck , And then getting to hs^2 and yknow , Vague gesture i would also be dead(unexplained because god forbid)

#rambling #theyrw never going to mention PM i swear. #and i’m not sure how much i really want them to #:yeaj: #i don’t think they ever mention her. is she like. Also dead . does jade not care auudgdh thinking too hard about hs 2 a million injured

[shiitanki]

misc doodles + a wip

#doodles #mgs #metal gear solid #mgs quiet #venom snake #big boss #revolver ocelot #solid snake #vquiet #i’m normal about vquiet i swear guys #also might make a little chibi series #we’ll see if college work kills me dead first #shiitanki scribbles

[amor-immortalem]

Spoilers for Nightbringer

Not the devs introducing us to Michael in a way where I couldn’t fucking kick his ass on sight. Now it makes me wonder…. Was the Raphael that we met in S4 really Raphael or was it Michael in disguise this whole time?

Something seems fishy about this shit.

#the devs really said Michael was the master of disguise huh? #motherfucker had all of us fooled #also hi I’m not dead I swear I’ll post the fic update soon #obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me swd #obey me! shall we date? #obey me nightbringer #obey me spoilers #obey me michael #om! michael #obey me raphael #om! raphael

[drarrytm]

I was doing the NYT crossword and obv made a Drarry scenario in my head.

Draco does the daily crosswords (or whatever magic crossword shit wizards would have) for the prophet but he only does it anonymously so nobody knows who’s making them. But everyday he sneaks a Harry clue in. Cause he obv spent years obsessing over him he knows a lot about him. Harry hates it but also loves it and he has no idea who is doing it. But he is going to find out.

Ex: “The first head auror to once be considered undesirable number 1 (Harry Potter),

“One nickname for Harry Potter (the boy who lived)” ((Harry hates that one especially))

But he does sweet ones too like

“The saviors favorite treat”(treacle tart),

“Head auror made history by becoming the youngest _______ at Hogwarts in a century” (seeker).

And the one that pushes Harry over and he has to figure out who is doing these.

“You can thank his mother for those emerald eyes but you can thank his father’s ____ heritage for his deep golden skin (Desi).”

Because Harry had only recently began to figure out and relate to his father’s heritage. He traced where his father’s side had come from and took a trip there and he took a lot of comfort in having that side of him.

#also I’m not 100% sure I came up with this pr if I’d seen something in a fic summary #so if that’s the case I’m sorry for copying anyone #I was writing this and was like have I seen something like this? #or was it the one where Draco writes stories for the wireless anon and Harry is obsessed with them?? #BJT YALL WILL MEVER BELIEVE ME #BUT I SWEAR TO FUCKIGN GOD #I was bored at work was doing todays crossword and this idea popped into my head #so I was reading the clues for today to make a hp play on them #then I fucking clicked on the ones from the past week which I hadn’t done #and I clicked on Wednesday and one clue was DEAD ASS #‘Lily Potter ___ Evans’ #for the word nee #MY JAW DROPPED #I wa s like oh my fuckign god #I can’t escape it #even tho I was literally looking for hints to relate to hp there being a fucking hp hint #sent me into orbit #desi Harry is real #drarry #Harry Potter #Draco malfoy #Harry x Draco

[marguerite-pizza]

batshit crackpot insane headcanon I’ve been brewing the past few days in which hyperlaser is an old fucked up grav and I need someone to hear me

#my art #phighting #phighting headcanons #phighting hyperlaser #phighting grav #warp is probably fucking dead #this wasn’t an excuse to give hyper a cropped suit jacket I swear #started out with the thought that “oh yknow people hc hyperlaser as a shark and grav is also a shark and kinda just spiraled from there #also his dialogue with medkit where it feels very familiar #like he was there yknow #I’m screaming from the top of a cliff and no one is here to supervise

[greetings-inferiors]

Something set a few days after the end of persona 3. I know that the answer probably contradicts it but I haven’t played it so I don’t know what happens. I just realised how much Junpei would be able to relate to Aigis and had to write stuff down.

As Junpei left his room, he saw, out of the corner of his eye, a door, slightly ajar. His door. Wasn’t it locked now?

As he entered the now empty room, he saw Aigis squatting next to the stripped bed. Staring directly where one’s head would lie.

“C’mon, Aigis.” He sighed. “Yukari told you you’ve got to charge overnight.”

The robot didn’t even flinch.

Sighing again, he walked into the room and plopped himself onto the far side of the bed.

“Y’know, one time he forgot to plug his headphones in, and blasted his music so loud I could hear it from across the hall. Thinking back - he didn’t have bad taste, heh..”

Silence.

“Hey, look. I know you were… closer to him than the rest of us. And, you’re probably telling yourself that no one could understand, but… we all miss him, so - don’t think you’re alone.”

He looked back at Aigis and noticed the headphones crudely placed over Aigis’… ears? Was she wearing two sets of headphones now? What were those things anyway? Whatever he called them, she probably wouldn’t hear.

“I know how you feel, though. Chidori gave her life so that I could live on. How messed up’s that? I would’ve done the same for her, so why’d she get the last laugh? Then, after a while, I realised something. She wasn’t gone, she was still living in me, through my memories and experiences. In a way, she found a way to cheat death. Lucky, huh? Heh…”

He got up and started to head for the door.

“Although you can’t see him, Makoto is still with you. He lives on, in you. He sacrificed himself to keep your smile alive… and I hope we get to see it again one day.”

“Junpei-san!”

He whipped his head round to see her standing up next to the bed, staring directly at him. Her hair rustled against her face from the wind from the open window. The headphones had fallen around her neck, mp3 player dangling against her chest. For a second he thought he caught a glimpse of-

“Thank you,” The girl smiled a weak smile. He knew that smile, the effort it took to raise the corners of your mouth just enough to tell others that you’ll be okay. But it was enough. “I hope that I can see you smile again too.”

He smiled a weak smile.

“Seriously though, if Yukari finds you here she’ll lose it. Don’t tell her I left you here.”

As he escaped, Aigis made her way to the open window. Leaning against the windowsill, she looked up at the moon, visible despite the morning sun.

“Still with me, huh…”

#persona 3 reload spoilers #do androids dream of electric sheep #no #they dream of their dead boyfriend #text post #randyposting #this is kind of the first time I’ve done something like this #but I realised the similarities between Junpei and Aigis and I was so overwhelmed I had to write it down #I’ll get out of my persona 3 mourning phase soon I swear #fanfiction #fanfic #Aigis #aigis persona 3 #p3 aigis #junpei #junpei iori #p3 junpei #this has probably been done before #it’s a very obvious similarity #but still #also I couldn’t remember the floor plan so I’m sorry if junpei wouldn’t be across the hall I’m pretty sure his room is opposite #but it’s 2AM and I don’t want to boot up persona 3 reload just to check lmao #in fact I think I’d have to play a new game and get to the point where he moves in just to check LOL

[white-weasel]

*Deletes post about Hoffman & Angelina (Saw) parallels to the Kurashiki siblings (Zero Escape) because I realize it’s probably too niche a post even on this hell site*

#this is a joke but also it’s not #something something dead sister something taking vengeance by hiding your identity and putting the murderer through traps #something something by doing so you become consumed by a mission even greater than what originally prompted your plan #obviously there are some pretty big differences but the parallels are there I swear! I’m not crazy #zero escape #saw franchise #white weasel talks

[britcision]

Listen. Could Dead and Loving It be a fraction of the length and maybe finished by now if I only focused on Danny and Jason?

Possibly

Would it be a better story?

Probably, from several perspectives

But it absolutely would not be the same story, and nor would it be the story I want to tell

Because I am hopelessly addicted to ensemble casts, and I don’t want the boys to exist in a vacuum. I want Jason to run off with his siblings and with Danny’s friends, and I want Danny to fuck with the bats

I want them to touch all the parts of each others lives that existed before they met, and will still continue to exist after even if things change forever between them

I want all the background characters to interact with each other, have their own inner worlds and their own motivations, and yeah, this absolutely means this is not an efficient telling of a slow burn romance

Because the story isn’t the slow burn romance

The story is these two people, and the world they live in, the story is the way Duke and Cass both see Jason differently than Dick and Tim ever could and that matters, and that none of them are wrong

The story is Danny finally telling people who will listen about the Anti-Ecto Acts, and all the fucked up things the GIW do, and being able to ask for help and have that be okay

The story is messy and complicated and will have so many rises and falls, so many pivotal moments that are drama and combat and so many that are just two people talking to each other and finally seeing eye to eye

The story is the way that Jason’s relationships with his family can finally mend, now that he has someone who can get him the help he’s needed

The story is the way that Danny can come to terms with the responsibilities of being a king, the constant question of agency and power and what he’s worth if he’s only Danny and not the Ghost King

The story is Clockwork fucking with the pair of them because he specifically thinks it’s funny (he’s right)

And yeah, there’s a slow burn romance in there. There’s also a coming of age tale, and a story about healing and reconciling and moving forward knowing you cannot change the past, but you can do better

Unless fucking Clockwork decides you can change the past because yeah then it’s fine to just go do that I guess

I was kinda considering breaking the story out into multiple chunks because holy fuck is 100k an intimidating chunk of words, but I’m not gonna

It’s all one story, and you will be my hapless victims as we get to fucking 300k or wherever this beast ends because we are not here for efficient story telling and motion of the plot

We’re here for the connections, the characters, the meaningless bullshit that would absolutely be cut in anything anyone ever wanted to sell, cuz I am not selling this

Imma write every fucking scene I wish I got from books, TV, movies, podcasts, actual plays, every fucking time I scream at the characters to just fucking talk to each other because messy is good too

Messy is okay

Stories don’t need to be marketable to be worth telling, and this one’s gonna be too long and intimidating for some people and that’s okay

But I fuckin’ rolled in from Critical Role which averages around 500 hours of content per campaign and a cast of 7 plus Matt’s NPCs

And I STILL want more goddamn character moments from all of them so I haven’t found a size yet that I can’t manage

I love reading focused stories that I can get through fast, and fuck, look at the rest of my AO3; I will fucking never diss a one shot, or a short story, or a piece that really focuses in on one or two characters

Delicious, I love them, my bread and butter

It’s just not what this mess is gonna be, and that’s okay too

Gods be fucking willing we will not have another six chapters that take place over the course of three hours, but we’ll just have to see how that shakes out cuz I’m being possessed by a seemingly infinite number of plot bunnies and my own tendency for “hey it’d be funny if”

And oh boy has it been funny every time

#danny fenton dead and loving it #i swear i can do short stories #i’m just not #also yeah 300k if we’re lucky based on my outlines so far #some of this will go faster but we’ll see #totally was gonna let tim just google amity park with tucker’s advice in mind but then #then my brain went ‘hey how funny would it be if danny just forgot they can’t contact amity’ #‘and tim couldn’t find a way around needing the amity park ip’ #so now we get a bunch more frustrated bat sibs #and i regret nothing #fucking adding like 5k to the story but it’s 5k of CRIME #and my sweet beloved darling harley #i did actually read all her comics up to 2018 #only dc character i go for but i am considering some red hood #mostly to see how upset comic store owners get when i ask for my 6’ of babygirl #no business for them if they got that toxic masculinity i only shop where cat maid hood rules #which fucking cannot be found online i’m heartbroken

[zyana-wyvern]

When you expect to have a lighthearted, fun romance with a game’s resident himbo, but he turns out to be a haunted, broken, complicated Byronic hero.

Picture this.

You happily hop into a new game thinking you’re finally gonna have some good fun, no hyper fixations, nor existential crisis. Be a normal human being for once!

Then you decide to romance what you’ve heard is just a semi evil himbo, even though you promised yourself years ago when everyone was raving about him, that you will NOT take the bait.

You took the bait hard though and the further you go into the story, the worse it gets.

And yet again you say to yourself “ffs it’s just a game”. But it never really is just a game, is it?😮‍💨💀

#dead of the night ramblings #baldurs gate 3 #bg3 #astarion #i don’t sleep #I won’t sleep #i just need 4 hours of meditation I swear :))) #me things #also I’m elvensexual #I have to admit it to myself for mental health #he is probably the 4th elf I crush hard on #without adding the fact that I at least liked pretty much all elves I encountered

[spooky-spicy-skeleton]

I have watched Dead Poets Society five times in the past two weeks 😌

… I’m fine, why do you ask?

#dead poets society #oops secondary hyper fixation unlocked #I have also done some fan art 🤷 #…. and poetry #no really guys I swear I’m fine #I swear really-

[beloved-ranger]

I have Fel brain rot. Thinking about all his perspectives about urge and just everything about him. He deserves a hug from urge. Parent of all time to me, though he’s still a weird little creepy guy. I kinda want to cry about it, it’s so sweet but also tragic. I haven’t gotten to the whole murder tribunal part (so if you could refrain from saying too much about it), all I know is Fel gets distraught over Bhaal killing urge. I love Fel, I love his dynamic with a memoryless urge, him watching urge become a new person, while also knowing so much about them and knowing exactly what they’re thinking. Fel trying to get urge to go back to Bhaal reminds me of the Mary Wollstonecraft quote “No man chooses evil because it is evil; he only mistakes it for happiness, the good he seeks.” Like UGH. Screaming. I love Fel. I love Fel and Urge and Orin. I love their family. I could go on for pages and pages about them and all their dynamics and all their feelings in these situations and what they think of each other.

Anyways post brought to you by a semi sweet song that reminded me of how I currently think Fel thinks about Urge.

#Kane would give him a ‘best butler’ sweater #more than willing to answer asks about this little guy #that’s my boy. I’m actually about to cry. also got chest pain but that’s unrelated #the sun is also directly in my eyes so maybe that’s apart of it #this is actually kinda what the fuck I’m working on right now is about #fic* #I meant fic. not fuck. I swear I can’t type for shit #bg3 #Baulder’s gate 3 #sceleritas fel #the dead bee #Kane #urges they be dark #the dark urge

[fenixburned]

sometimes I just think about how Nico grew from a scared 10 year old who ran away from the corpses they accidentally summoned in their anger to arguably one of the most powerful demigods who controls the shadows & raises the dead in battle if necessary & I’m just- 🥹🥹

#tbd #I just love him so so much you don’t understand 😭😭 #listening to the playlist & having feels but at least it’s distracting dudndjdjdksk #OK BUT ALSO: so much of his strength comes from necessity? #like they ran away & they literally didn’t have anyone else so ofc they had to learn to defend themself & use every advantage #also we don’t talk about the mental drain that comes with talking to the dead that much that’s an entirely different post :))) #just seeing how comfortable they’ve become in who they are has me in tears tbh 🥹 #also I swear I don’t want to ignore anyone who messaged me #but I only really have the energy to talk to one person (my partner) rn I’m so sorry 😭