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#I gotta be my first fan and love eveything i do
flamboyant-king · 1 year
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Happy New Years!
I hope to show up more often on here with art to share!
Maybe just posting dumb stuff, but I also hope to see y’all more often too. 
\(^o^) Cheers!
#i want to be more disciplined this year and actually work towards something artistically#maybe making more comics or work on a game or improve my art even#maybe sell merch or consistently do commissions. Its so inconsistent because of all my doubt ya know#I gotta be my first fan and love eveything i do#i need to have something to show for my passions before my parents die#or they are gonna die knowing i have not achieved anything. In things they wanted orwhat i wanted#and i want to show them that i believe in myself for once#ive done nothing worth talking about. I have nothing to bring to the dinner table#i have n o t h i n g because no one let me choose what i wanted#My parents will not have anything to be proud of and its theirs and my fault#so i just need to do something. S o m e t h i n g#i could have been something. I could have had anything#but alas. My hands are empty. My legacy is blank. And my future is clouded.#but i need to have love for myself and what i do#i see folks who arent popular who arent that skilled doing things i wish i could do#and they have confidence. They love themselves. They are passionate.#i had passion but i dont have love and i dont have confidence#i tried. I did. I had a year i didnt self depreciate at all. But you know when you get crushed to bits you kind of fall back#for over a decade i wanted to table at an artist alley. For years i wanted to sell merch#for yearsi wanted to make a business card just to be like haha look at me im a professional#i have no confidence in myself. I have no love for myself. I have no faith in myself. Because no one had those for me.#my brothers had some faith in me. But when my wrist just died it just disappeared#they still send me art job openings opportunities contests internships etc#and i never go for it#because i have so little faith in myself that i just dont even try#i just want someone to be there right next to me and help me through it#I want my brother to be there next to me helping me apply. I want my parents with me helping me try#i want my friends with me to guide my hand to that submit button. That apply button.#i think yeah all of my faith died when i couldnt go to art college. They really wanted me i was ready and i applied there all on my own#but no. But no. But nonononono. I need a high paying job like engineering and comouter science
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coolhellochild · 4 years
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I sat down in my living room.It was a long day at work.I grabbed myself a cup of coffee.It was cold.I made it this morning,but i didnt have time to drink it.So i drank it now.I sit down on the couch and put my legs on the arm rest.Flicked on the Tv and cruised through some of the channels.It was the same as usual.There were some reality shows, some basic news, and some movies.None of this interested me.When i thought of something, they added a new channel to the Tv.It was about drama on the internet. At first i thought it was dumb. because why would anybody want to know that? But then i thought why not? Things have been chaotic these past few days so why not get a little kick out of it? I watched the channel for about fifteen minutes.Nothing interesting happened. Mostly people throwing shade at Shane Dawson and Jeffree star.When at one point one youtuber caught my eye. His name was Baka Prase. These youtubers came out doing something controversial or saying something controversial.But this one.. oh my..he had no shame.He got on the youtuber news for doing one very very strange thing. He tried to make children with an actual pig. People were making fun of him for having the name Baka Prase(Grandma pig).
While he was still just a mere human. Obviously they were trolls and five yo.
But this fucking dumbass was so braindead that he tried to make half human half pig kids.And not only that but he swallowed three inflated ballons to improve his vocal cords. Some person told him that his songs were horrible and that he cant sing and he should practice by expanding his throat by swallowing inflated baloons.EIther this was a hater trying to kill him or some random Karen who actually thought this would work.And now he has AIDS and lung cancer. I was astonished.How could this bitchass be so dumb? And then i remembered something.. I had a little cousin who was a big fan of his.He wanted to marry him. And i thought i had to stop him. So i ran to my uncles house to stop him from proposing but i was too late. There i saw my cousin and the bitchass kissing and hugging with chickfile discount ring pops on their fingers.I was so scared sick and disgusted. It reminded me of that one time i was in a taco bell bathroom. But then a shimmering spark of hope burst through the window. It was none other than our late king Harambe.Everybody in the room started crying involunarily(that is the side effect if seeing his glory). He spoke in a storng godlike voice with soft melodies that sounded like they were sung by my chemical romance, filled the air. He said Child... Do not mrry this dumbass bitch. For i command you to, because i am the lord of eveything. My cousin and that dumb pig excalimed angrily We shall not we love each other too much that is why we shall have pig children. Harambe spoke in a calm yet intimidating voice Then ishall have to let the fury of Ugandan Knuckles on you.From a distance you could hear a noise so horrifying,so petrifying that turned the wine on the table into water. It sounded like clicking.. no snapping... oh no wait it was the war cry of the Knuckles. That is when the baka prase pig said the most dumb thing in the world. Ide gas tebra. in that moment through the door burst a giant red monster.
It made a clicking sound and spoke one thing.
D O Y O U K N O W D A W A Y ?
AT THAT MOMENT I JUMPED OUT OF THE WINDOW TO ESCAPE THE HORROR SHOW THAT WILL COME. I RAN WHERE MY LEGS CARRIED ME AND THATS HOW I ENDED UP HERE. A GIRL IN A VILLAGE DOING ALRIGHT AND THEN I BECAME A PRINCESS OVERNIGHT.nOW I GOTTA FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO ITN RIGHT SO MUCH TO LEARN AND SEE. UP IN THE CASTLE WITH MY NEW FAMILY IN A SCHOOL THATS JUST FOR ROYALTY IM SO EXCITED TO BE SOFIA THE FIRSTTTTTT!!!!!!!
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stcnedheart · 5 years
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✵ :3
@oflightningandfire. ( ✵ )
—  first  impression:❛  ah,  sasuke.  ❜  sensitive  topic  that  she’d  rather  avoid  at  all  cost.  but  running  away  from  problems  would  do  her  no  good  and  it  never  helped  —  she  had  to  cope  with  it.   ❛  he  was..  to  me,  he  was  my  idol.  he  was  strong,  he  was  special,  he  was  a  mystery,  and  he  was  everything  i  had  hoped  i  was  —  and  he  was  someone i  could  never  reach.  admittedly,  sasuke  was  unrealistic  in  my  memory.  ❜     —  current  impression:  ❛  he  had  seen  a  lot  of  shit,  gone  through  a  lot  of  shit,  and  dealt  with  a  lot  of  shit  throughout  his  entire  life  —  i’ve  gotta  say,  he  is  one  tough  son  of  a  bitch  and  i’d  rather  not  cross  sword  with  him.  it’s  best  that  nobody  pisses  him  off.  over  the  years,  he  had  grown  from  a  vengeful  killing  machine  —  seeking  for  nothing  but  the  destruction  of  those  who  had  ruined  him,  to  a human.  and  i  respect  him  from  the  bottom  of  my  heart.  ❜  to  him,  she  may  never  be  of  help  to  ease  his  pain,  and  she  may  never  be  able  to  understand  the trauma  and  the horror  sasuke  had  to  endure  to  be  who  he  is  today,  but  she  knew  that  —  she  was  sure  that  —  he  was  and  always  had  been  her friend,  despite  all  the  shit  he  had  done  —  he  was  uchiha  sasuke:  her  teammate,  her  friend,  and  a  part  of  who  she  is.—  attraction:❛  naturally.  as  friends.  i’m  attracted  to  him,  because  i  do care  for  him  —  he  has  gone  through  hell  and  back  and  i  honestly  don’t  want  to  watch  him suffer  anymore  without  being  unable  to  do  anything  about  it  !  i  know  he  was  a  criminal  to  konoha’s  government  and  he  had  to  pay  off  for  the  things  he  had  done  —  but  it  was  unfair,  yeah  ?  if  that  makes  sense  somehow.  his  actions  were  awful, he  was  awful,  but  he  was back,  and  he  deserves  more  than  cold  shoulders  and  mocking  and  glaring..  or  is  it  just  me  being  selfish  though.  ❜  all  of  her  friends  deserve  eveything,  nobody  can  convince  her  otherwise.  —  frightening:❛  everything  about  him  is  frightening. ❜  a.k.a:  uchiha  sasuke’s  fucking  mood  swings,  because  what  is  his  deal  ?!  —  adorable:  ❛  i..  honestly  don’t  associate  him  with  that  word.  and  i  can’t.  i’m.. not  that  brave.  ❜  uchiha  sasuke  and  adorable  in  the  same  sentence ?  what  is  even  —  !  disregarding  the  absurdity  of  this  particular  question,  and  hopefully  she  won’t  get  herself  one  (  1 )  bitter  and  annoyed  uchiha  hot  on  her  heels  later,  sakura  did  find  sasuke’s  behaviour  around  naruto  to  be..  adorable,  she  wasn’t  supposed  to  see  all  that  though !! —  sacrifice:   ❛  i  don’t  believe  he  needs  me  to,  if  i  were  to  be  completely  honest.  he  is  strong  —  a  lot  stronger  than  i  am,  and  a  lot  is  just  putting  it  mildly  !  but  i’ll  always  be  there  for  him  nonetheless  whether  he  needs  me  or  not,  he’ll  always  have  my  support  and  my  love  and  that  is  a  guarantee,  and  if  the  situation  is  dire,  i  would  never  hesitate  to  sacrifice  my  life  for  him.  ❜  in  short,  yes  she  fucking  would.  she  would  die  for  any  of  her  friends  to  be  honest. —  dating  ?  (  platonic/romantic  ): ❛  i  do  love  him  as  a  friend,  but  our  relationship  is  broken  enough  and  we  are  slowly  —  awkwardly  —  mending  it,  dating  will  only  make  everything  worse.  ❜  he  was  her  first  crush  —  that  couldn’t  be  changed.  but  he  had  taught  her  so  many  things  through  the  hard  ways  and  by  now,  she  respected  him  and  she  was  grateful  for  that.    —  one  word  to  describe  sasuke: ❛   sausage.  ❜   —  slapping  ? ❛  no. ❜  but  she  would  punch  him  with  zero  hesitation  !!  —  hugs  and  kisses  ? ❛  if  he  doesn’t  try  to  kill  me  while  doing  it,  then perhaps.  ❜  she  wasn’t  sure  —  she  had  known  him  for  ages  and  she  was  well  aware  that  sasuke  wasn’t  a  fan  of  intimacy,  be  it  friends  or..  whatever.  although,  if  her  touch  can  heal  him  —  physically  and  mentally  wise  —  she  wouldn’t  mind,  she  would  never.  her  life  was  a  bloody  mess,  she  —  herself  —  had  fucked  up  so  many  times  that  she  had  lost  count  of  it,  she  had  lost  trust,  she  had  been  broken,  but  her  friends  were  there  for  her  until  the  end  !!  and  for  that  — sakura  wished  for  nothing  more  than  for  her  friends  to  be  happy.
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gladioluuss · 5 years
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A colorful journey of being a FANGIRL /girl group EDITION/
Well.. this post is about me sharing some experience about my career in the KPOP world as a fangirl. It’s been 10 years since I became a fan so I’ll reminisce. The topic for this post is about GIRL GROUPS since I’ve only stanned few boy groups (but I’ll have separate appreciation post for that). Click that Keep Reading button :D
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Disclaimer: This list and story are based on my experiences and personal preference. I’m not forcing anyone to like my opinion or to agree with me. 
The Beginning
I’m a KPOP fan that started in 2009 because of the influence of 2ne1. Sandara Park is my idol before and when 2ne1 debuted I supported their songs, waited for their MVs to appear on Myx channel that we have in out TV because there is no Youtube that is available yet. I listened to their songs I don’t care  and Fire. Then I have an older cousin who let me listen to 4 Minute’s songs like Mirror Mirror and Ready Go. 
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Then 2010 arrived, before the school year started I played with my guy friends and one of them let me listen to Girl’s Generation. Oh! is my favorite, I even stream it in youtube and listen to it repeatedly.  Also I listened to Gee and even memorized the lyrics. When I am attending school, I had friends that are also KPOP fans and they influenced me to listen to Big Bang, the first Boy Group that I admired (I’ll tell my story on Boy Groups in another post). Then we fangirl to 2ne1 and Big Bang. We listened to I am the Best  which is the hit song of the year and also Fantastic Baby (which is Big Bang’s). We dance to the song (I am the best). 
I was a hardcore Black Jack when 2012 came and I had discovered a lot more groups. I continued listening to 2ne1, 4 minute and SNSD songs then adding to the group that I liked are f(x) with Hot Summer, After School with Flashback, Kara with Pandora, Miss A’s I don’t need a man also T-ara’s Bo Peep Bo Peep and SISTAR’s Loving U. I remember discovering these songs because MTV and Channel V has like this programs where they play MV’s of KPop groups.  I downloaded all of the Girl Group songs in my phone (and also boy group of course) especially when I find it cute/charming/catchy and good. This craze continued until before all of these group disbanded/ had member(s) left. (Or maybe the rise of 3rd Gen Idols). 
I’m almost ready to say that I’ll retire sooner or later since majority of the groups that I listen to has now disbanded or some members left (but still I’m hoping that they’ll do some reunion) /other reasons; I’m in college already so priorities/. This state (many 2nd Gen Groups disbanding/Hiatus) because its tough competition with the 3rd Gen; same case with Boy Groups. I like these 2nd Gen to 2.5 Gen groups (according to wikipedia) and I can say they became popular because of their hardwork not because they debuted under a popular company and became overrated and they have sincere music and to showcase their singing and dancing not just to become famous.
I’m sad to see these bands disband but I love that some still are going strong like EXID, APINK . But this implies that nothing goes forever and eveything changes. Time flies so fast, its like yesterday I’m listening to my pink ipod and now I’m writing this blog post and stating how I became a fan and how many years had passed. 
This part, I’m going to put the girl groups that I have adored throughout the years. (no particular order)
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2ne1 - My queens. One of the group that made a great foundation on why 3rd Gen groups are more popular than them now  KPOP is famous globally. 4eva my favorite. Songs: Fire, I am the Best, Clap your Hands, I Hate you, Ugly, Missing you, I Love you, Gotta be you. /I won’t be able to list all my favorite songs of the groups because all of them are good even the B-sides maybe in a separate post?/
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Girls Generation - My queens. All of their songs are bop tbh there is no song that made a hole in their career. From high heels to sneakers. Songs: Gee, Genie, Oh!, Run Devil Run, The Boys, I Got a Boy (tbh just check their youtube account and listen to all of their music). 
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4Minute - My queens. I LOVE THEIR SONGS EVERY COMEBACK IS A BOP. This group led me to continue the KPOP fangirl because I love their songs tbh every songs that I listen to its just a masterpiece. Songs: Muzik, Heart to Heart,I My Me Mine, Volume Up, Mirror Mirror, What’s you Name?, Watcha doin Today?, Hate, Crazy.
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Kara - I love this group SO MUCH I started stanning them in Pandora Era because their MVs are always on the TV. The first song that I was able to listen to is STEP and that’s when I started to look forward to their songs. I even like their Japanese Songs! I downloaded their Fantastic Girls Album. Songs: Step, Mister (or Mr.), Lupin, Pandora, Damaged Lady, Cupid
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f(x) - The first song that made me a MeU is Electric Shock + Sulli being in a drama with Minho of SHINee. Then I also enjoyed their song Hot Summer. I love their songs because it doesn’t have a typical genre that a girl group would be having but f(x) is special because they have such creative songs even their B-sides are a bop! Songs: Electric Shock, Chocolate Love (tho its not their song... I still love their ver. compared to SNSD’s), Hot Summer, Red Light, 4 Walls, Nu ABO, Pinnochio (Danger), Red Light Album and Pink Tape Album.
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Sistar - I loveeeeee Sistar sooo soooo much. I have listened to a lot of their songs (Loving U being my favorite), dancing to their songs (to Alone, Loving You, Touch my Body). I know a handful of their title tracks because I always adore it.) Songs: Alone, Loving U, I Swear, Shake It , GIve it to Me, So Cool.
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Girl’s Day - The first song that I heard and actually liked is Expectation where they had this dance with suspenders. I like the dance of this song even tho its a too much for my age. Then I listened to their songs such as Female President, Something, Darling which I also memorized the choreo of these songs. My favorite is also Minah which I always feel like we have the same eyes because we both have eye smile. Songs: Twinkle Twinkle, Don’t Forget Me, White Day, Expect, Female President, Darling, Something, Ring My Bell.
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APink - I liked every APink song, every comeback I waited for them. I have seen their eras from cute to feminine to mature. I’m so happy that they are still alive and still doing some songs. Some recent songs are I’m so Sick and %%. Songs: I don’t Know, Hush, My My, BuBiBu, No No No, Mr. Chu, LUV, Remember, I’m So Sick, %%
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Honorable Mentions:
1. EXID - recommended songs: Every Night, Up & Down, Ah Yeah, Hot Pink, L.I.E, DDD, Lady, I Love You
2. After School - recommended songs: Bang, Love Love Love, Shampoo, In the Night Sky, Flashback, First Love
3. Nine Muses - recommended songs: Ticket, Dolls, Wild, Gun, Glue, Drama, Hurt Locker.
4. Secret - recommended songs: Poison, Shy Boy, Starlight Moonlight, Yoohoo, Talk That
5. T-ara - recommended songs: Bo Peep Bo Peep, Why are you Being like this?, Number 9, Roly Poly, Sugar Free
6. Rainbow - recommended songs: Mach, A, Tell me Tell Me, Cha Cha, Sunshine
7. AOA - recommended songs: Mini Skirt, Short Hair, Heart Attack, Like a Cat, Confused
8. STELLAR - recommended songs: Marionette, Fool, Vibrato, Mask, Sting
9.  Brown Eyed Girls - recommended songs: Abracadabra, Kill Bill
I’m a proud 2nd Gen Fan of the KPOP world.
i love this era bcs no overrated bands like x and x etc
note: pictures aren’t mine; here are the sources: [image 1] [image 2] [2ne1][SNSD][4Minute][KARA] [f(x)] [SISTAR] [Girl’s Day] [Apink] [Gif 1]
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Text
Another world- Avengers × reader
Warning: none
Plot: The reader is a very hard core Marvel lover, who reads just a little to much fanfiction. One night after a very long day, after reading your daily dose of fanfic, you end up being in one after you make a wish.
A/N: So this is my first fanfiction so ya. Maybe leave feedback and give a like or reblog? Maybe both? Thanks.
After a long-long day at school, I go home and take a shower. A much needed one. I mean, I didn't even do anything to sweat? Why. So. Much.
After a long, relaxing shower, I put on shorts and a Spiderman t-shirt. Jumping on the bed to red the lastest fanfiction book, which I most likely will finish within a few hours.
Man, what I would give to be in the Marvel universe, being with some of my favorite superheros.
After I finish that book, I search for another one since it's only seven. Halfway though the book I end up falling asleep, phone in my hand still reading the fanfiction.
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Waking up on a solid floor, one that is definitely not my soft, warming bed. I must have fallen of in the middle of the night. Not even bothering to open my eye's because I know the was around, I walk toward the kitchen to get some breakfest.
Apparently not happening. I could have swore there wasn't a door right there. Opening my eye's I see a plain white room. It only has a bed with a dresser next to it, and a glass of water. Definitely not my bedroom.
Knocking on the door after a much failed attempt at the doornob. Of couse my kidnapper wouldn't leave it unlocked. As much as fanfiction I've read I should've known what to do in a situation like this. Guess all of it didn't stick. Maybe this all is a dream.
Suddenly a voice came from the door. Guess I spaced out for awhile. Apparently enough where they have to wave a hand in my face. Very rude.
'Uh, hello? Im talking to you. Who are you and how did you end up here?'
I can tell we are gonna be great friends. Note the sarcasm.
Looking up at this man, I can already ready tell you I'm dreaming. No was Robert Downy Jr. is at my-well where ever this is with me. No freaking way. Before anyone wakes me up I jump at the opportunity.
Can I have an autograph please? Can I touch your hair? Maybe a picture too? No way I'm letting up this chance, even if it's a dream. Can I hold your hand too? Maybe some other stuff like-
'Hold on there kid, we gotta figure out how you ended up here first. Then the pictures because I am not one to turn that down. I mean, what kind of man would I be to let down fans? What do you mean dream anyways?'
I assume it's a dream, no way Robert freaking Downey Jr would be here or even kidnap me.
'Whos this Robert dude? I'm Tony Stark. Everyone know this'
Pinching my arm to make myself wake up. It's not working. Why isn't it working?
Thinking back to all those fanfictions, the one's were the reader or a random person would end up in the Marvel universe, opening a book, finding a portal, or even wishing to be in the Marvel universe.
Right before I went to sleep I wished to be here. Maybe it came true?
Looking back up at 'Tony Stark' I start of with a few common questions.
Where am I?
'At the Avengers tower'
How did I get here?
'When Steve was walking to the conference room you landed out of nowhere. He brought you here where you were out for a few hours. Aren't I supposed to ask you the questions? Not the other way around.'
Standing up and stretching from sitting back on the bed, I start walking toward the conference room. F. R. I. D. A. Y? What floor is the Avengers on?
Tony started talking before F. R. I. D. A. Y. Could answer.
Wait a minute. Hey kid! Where are you going? We aren't done yet'
To the conference room old man.
For one, not an old man. Two, how do you even know who that is? And where eveything is?
Just follow me and I'll explain. Old man.
After a very ackward elevator ride with Tony starring the whole time, we walked toward the room that holds every Avenger. Even the newer one's. (Let's pretend that Pietros alive and Peter has already joined for the plot)
Walking in with Tony on my heels, I feel everyones eyes on me while I walk up to the front I've seen in the movies.
They all started talking, each voice mixing to make an even louder one each time one joined in asking questions. I waited untill they were quite, knowing I wasn't answer. Starring right back at them. Not everyone gets to meet the Avengers on a daily bases.
I started off with this:
Hello everyone one! I am Y/N Y/L/N. I believe Im from another universe where Superheros aren't real, meaning Im either dreaming or my dream came true.
'How do we know your not lieing? You just popped outta nowhere. How can we trust you?'
Steve freaking Rogers calls out. Wow. Everyone starts to agree with him.
I know things about you not even you know about yourself. Going in a line threw the people I started at Tony who was still standing next to me. He's a little tense. Seems everyone is. Turning to each one as I talked to them.
Tony, your father always neglected you. You loved him anyways.
Stevie was next. He was the person sitting infront of Tony.
Steve, you still owe Peggy a dance.
Steve looks down like he's remembering something. Most likely connected to what I said. Bucky next.
James, plums. Just plums. Oh and 'til the end of the line pal'
Steve finally looks up and the two look at eachother. Sam is next.
Sam, 'on your left' is what Steve would say to you as he ran past.
Next was Nat.
Nat, you where in the re-
'Ok, Ok. We get it. Your from another universe. Question is how' Tony said from beside me. Some are still a little tense from almost being called out what happens in their lifes.
I don't know really. All I did was make a wish to be here. I just read fanfiction about you all in my world. None of you were real. Just actors and actresses.
'Wait did you say fanfiction? About who?' Always the smart one that Peter Parker is. Wait. Oh crap.
Nevermind. I said quickly. Maybe if I change the subject they won't ask. So as I was saying,-
'Tell us more about this....fanfiction.' Thor says.
I can just show you all. No way I was gonna get out of this now. Just pretend your confident about this. Then when you get alone you can scream because you showed the Avengers your daily writing and reading job.
I take out my phone that somehow ended up in my shorts pocket. Thank Thor for whoever made shorts with a pocket.
I kinda also write it, I say as I put up Wattpad. This is where I read and write it. My current one is about the reader waking up in this world, one were superheroes do exist, and the one where they are from superheros aren't real. Much like what's happening with me now.
There's pieces written about each and everyone of you, by me and many other people. Nice and naughty.
'What do you mean by ' naughty'? Thor asks.
Who's gonna explain this one to him?
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