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tinkertoysdamn · 7 months

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WiP Wednesday - 10/4

Here's some bits from some of my WiPs, for funsies! (I debated putting some Poisonville in here but I've been updating rather quickly so it seemed redundant)

A) Untitled Thorquillmora Fantasy AU smut fic excerpt

B) The Legendary Star-Lord Returns Part 8

C) The Sun Always Shines on TV - Old Boostle concept

Untitled Thorquillmora Fantasy AU smut fic - (1700 words written)

Meanwhile, in the other room, Thor and Gamora were engaged in a contest of wills. Though they had worked together to bring the thief Peter Quill to heel, their alliance was an uneasy one. For Thor’s loyalty ultimately lay with Asgard and the royal family; the idea of assisting the dread Warlord Thanos was abhorrent to him.

“I won’t let you take that Map to Thanos,” Thor said, drawing himself up to his full height. Perhaps he could avoid violence by demonstrating his superior strength. He hoped that Gamora would back down for her own sake if nothing else.

Gamora, a mighty warrior in her own right, was not intimidated. “I have no intention of returning to Thanos at all.”

That was oddly convenient. Thor could not help but wonder if it was a trap. “Then what do you want with the Map?”

“To sell it and start a new life,” Gamora said. “The Map in its current state is useless to Thanos, he doesn’t have the magic key to unlock its secrets. I want to put it into the hands of someone who can.” Then she muttered, nearly under her breath. “Maybe they can defeat Thanos and keep him from harming anyone else.”

The rumors surrounding Gamora had always centered on her prowess in battle, not in deception. Thor believed her. “Do you know what the key is?”

Gamora nodded. “It requires the touch of someone with Celestial blood, but the Celestials haven’t left their island in decades.”

Of all things, that was the one Thor had expected the least. “About that—”

“What?” Gamora searched Thor’s face and recoiled. “Don’t tell me, you’ve seen—”

“When I was a child, I was betrothed to the son of Ego the Celestial King. After all this time, Ego finally arrived in Asgard to tell us that his son was kidnapped ages ago and for the sake of peace between our nations I needed to find him.” Thor stroked his chin in thought. “I wonder if this Map’s sudden reappearance has anything to do with Ego.”

“In any case,” Gamora said, “we need Quill to tell us where he hid it.”

Somehow, in the moments during his actual capture, the sneak thief had managed to spirit the Map away. Gamora and Thor had searched his clothes but found nothing.

Right on cue, Peter cried out from the other room. “I can’t feel my hands. I think these are too tight.” He was working hard to sound extra sad and pathetic.

Thor crossed the room toward the bedroom door. As his hand reached the knob, Gamora spoke.

“You know,” she said, “he's going to try to seduce you to escape.”

“Oh no.” Thor rolled his eyes, his voice flat. “An attractive man I want to sleep with might try to seduce me. Whatever shall I do?”

Gamora mulled the sarcastic comment over in her mind. Thor had made an excellent point, perhaps one that could even be used to their advantage. She placed her hand over his, grasping the knob together. “What if,” she said, her voice low, “we turned it around on him?”

“What do you mean?” Thor asked.

“What if we seduce the Map’s location out of him?” Gamora asked.

The corner of Thor’s lip curved into a knowing smile. “You want to bed him as well.”

“What if I do?” Gamora asked, her jaw and determination firm.

“I think,” Thor said, “we’re about to have a very good time.”

The Legendary Star-Lord Returns Part 8 - aka I need inspiration before coming back to this one--this is what I've got

Lesser men would have withered under that blank stare. “My wife is a Skrull.”

Peter, realizing that his foot had been firmly planted in his mouth, said the only thing that came to mind: “I hope you and your wife are happy together.”

The Sun Always Shines on TV - Old Boostle Story Concept

“Everyone else is open about their civilian identities, except for me. I’m the odd one out, I feel–” the curve of Blue Beetle’s mouth faltered. “It’s lonely.”

“Well, I think none of us have anything to protect really,” Booster said. Also the others all had powers and Blue Beetle–didn’t. Booster wasn’t going to mention it, though he didn’t think he was all that much without his flight ring and suit. Mocking Beetle for his lack of powers wouldn't feel right. “Maybe you do.”

Blue Beetle sighed. “Sort of.”

It was a weak answer. “It’s not like any of us would recognize you right? Unless you were some kind of celebrity.” Booster laughed at the very thought. Blue Beetle, protector of the helpless and purveyor of pranks couldn’t possibly be anyone other than ordinary.

Beetle answered with silence. Total utter silence.

The gears in Booster’s brain started turning. “Wait,” he said, “are you some kind of celebrity?”

“Uh–” The word was drawn out, like Beetle didn’t really want to answer.

Booster’s face broke out into a massive grin. “Oh my god,” he said. “This is amazing.” He grabbed Beetle’s shoulders. “You have to tell us now.”

“Hey,” Beetle protested, “I never agreed–”

“Look,” Booster said, his tone very serious. “Think about how much it would piss off Guy.”

At that thought, Ted’s face broke out in a devilish grin that rivaled Booster’s.

Later

It was that night when they gathered the rest of the League. It was in the rec room, a place of comfort and safety. “I have an announcement,” Beetle said. “You’ve all been so open with me about who you are and I haven’t returned the courtesy.”

Bea and Tora nodded their encouragement. Guy acted like he didn’t care, but Booster knew better. The Martian Manhunter though, took this in with his usual stoic grace.

“Are you certain you want to do this?” Jo’nn asked. “Of all of us you have the best chance of an anonymous life.” Blue Beetle wore a mask, none of the others could truly hide, even if they wanted to.

“I’m not telling the press,” Beetle said. “And I’m trusting you not to say anything.”

“Booster,” Guy coughed under his breath while Booster simultaneously coughed under his breath, “Guy.”

Beetle carefully pulled up his goggles revealing bright eyes, then with a press of his thumb on the lock on his cowl, it came unbuckled. He lifted the cowl off his face, his brown hair, damp with sweat, stuck to his forehead.

He was only in his twenties, far too young for the occasional wisdom he displayed. Although hardly plain, the man under the cowl was more “adorkable” than handsome. He cleared his throat. “Hi, my name is Ted Kord and I’m the Blue Beetle.”

Five pairs of eyes stared at him in sheer disbelief. It was Bea who broke the silence. “Wait, Kord as in Kord Industries? As in, ‘Millionaire Recluse Ted Kord?’”

“I’m not really a recluse,” Beetle, uh Ted, said. “I just like my privacy.”

Guy did a double take. “Did you say millionaire?”

“I’m a billionaire,” Ted said, “technically.”

#tinker writing process #gotg #thorquillmora #boostle

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acciocriativity · 3 years

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All Too Well||Harry Potter

Pairing: Harry Potter x Reader/Sirius' Daughter

Summary: The Second Wizard War was over more than a month ago and everybody had scars that might never be fully healed. This is not a new concept for you, you lost everything you once had.

Warnings: The whole thing is really angst

Word Count: 2,2k

A/N: I absolutely loved to write this fic, it is my first request so I'm a bit nervous haha. I hope you all enjoy!

I was used to the pain, both physical and emotional. After a week of Tonks and Lupin's funeral, everything was empty and the pain was numb, I had no hope that this would end anytime soon.

Largo Grimmauld's house had stayed for me, but after everything that happened, I couldn't even think of putting my feet there. To be fair, anywhere I could possibly go would have memories that are too painful to bear, so I rented a room in the Leaky Cauldron until I had an idea of ��what to do with my life. I just didn't imagine it would take so long for that to happen.

Almost a month after the War was over, I had the willpower to go to the bank, as I was the last Black alive, everything that was in the coffers of those horrible people was now mine and they needed my consent to make the transfer.

To be honest I wish I had set fire to everything but unfortunately I needed money, my savings were almost over but I swore, even as a new millionaire, that I would not use anything more than necessary and that as soon as I had a job, I would return every penny, the minimum to make my father proud.

The next step took a few more days, visiting the abandoned house at Largo Grimmauld. For a few seconds I waited to see Kreacher there, which is really ironic, his bad mood would be the most comforting thing for me at the moment.

The pictures continued to scream, the mess was still in place, nothing new. There was no way I could live there at all, the few months I spent there were only possible because my father was there, Harry was there and obviously Mrs. Weasley's food helped a lot.

I haven't seen her since the Battle of Hogwarts, I knew that no Weasley would be against my visit, after all we were allies and even friends but I couldn't make it. They are dealing with their own losses and I know that He is there too.

He, it’s been a long time since I didn’t think about him or at least I wanted to fool myself thinking so. In the past year nothing has been able to take the eminent worry out of my heart, not for me but for him.

As I looked around the dusty room, I realized the stupid idea I had, here was the climax of my relationship with Harry.

- They would be very proud, you know - I said quietly looking at the brunette in the corner of my eye, he was looking at that picture again - not only because you are fighting as you can but because you are still you, you are still Harry, only Harry.

We were silent for a few seconds until I could see his green eyes staring at me in the pitch of the cold night, with only one lamp on and then he smiled, for how long I didn’t see his eyes shine so brightly?

- I guess only you think so but that's okay, I like just being Harry with you - he took one of my hands and we stayed like that, in silence, a moment of peace and quiet.

I felt an overwhelming urge to cry but I didn't allow myself to. Not after all this time that I was fixing the broken pieces of me. I took a deep breath and looked around, even though I knew there would be no one there, I went upstairs to my room.

Big mistake again, I already knew what would be waiting for me up there.

- Harry, what are you doing here ?? My dad will kill you if he finds out you are in my room! - I was in shock with the little love he had for his own life, since Sirius' room was right next to mine.

- And who said he needs to find out? In fact, we are not doing anything inappropriate, I just… - he didn't want to admit it, but it was always obvious, the dark circles under his eyes gave away his sleepless nights.

The only thing I did was make room on the bed, which was enough to make him smile and lie down with me. We didn't sleep, we just kept talking until the tiredness won us over but even without sleep, I felt that I was helping in some way.

I walked calmly through the room, it was the same way I had left it, the bed untied and the light blue paint already peeling, I opened the closet and started to take some clothes off the hangers.

I was sure that I would return there, that everything would work out, that I could somehow form a home at some point and how wrong I was...

The third step towards my full recovery was one of the most difficult decisions I had to make. Admitting that there was no more space for me in London, that I was alone and I could do nothing about it, that I needed to leave everything behind and start over once and for all.

In the meantime, I often visited that house. I was not ready to let go, even the things I hated the most there, which is basically everything.

The last step was to say goodbye, so I visited Tonks and Lupin’s grave, I also visited Andromeda for the first time and finally met Teddy Lupin. He was adorable as I had imagined, with his mother's colored hair.

I said that I needed to be away for a while and she replied the only thing I didn't expect to hear.

- I understand dear, but know that you can always have a home here with us - her voice gave me a comfort that I didn't know I needed until then.

- I will remember it fondly and I will really come back, I want to be in the life of this little one here, if you let me - and then, her response came with a motherly hug, I couldn't contain myself anymore.

I couldn't take the weight of the pain alone and she didn't say one word until I calmed down. If I wasn’t as broken as I knew I was, I wouldn't have left her house anytime soon.

Apparating in front of the Burrow wasn't the most difficult part, even though I didn't completely master the apparition. I changed my mind at least 10 times before I reached the door and another 5 times before I knocked.

The sky was completely black, but the storm clouds covered the view of the moon and stars, no sound from inside the house was made and so I tried again and waited patiently.

- Y/N… my dear, what are you doing here in the middle of the night? Come in, you must be cold - the red-haired woman was wearing a purple robe and the only change I noticed was her tired eyes and lacking the natural glow inside them.

- I'm sorry for suddenly appearing here Molly, I wanted to say goodbye - I spoke as soon as I entered the room, almost as cold as outside.

- Are you moving dear? You should have warned me before, I could have made you a farewell party - she guided me to the kitchen and I was sure I wouldn't leave without a cup of tea.

I tried to stay as calm as possible, but I couldn't convince my heart to do the same. The sofa, the dining table and even the stairs...

- RONALD WEASLEY COME HERE NOW - the irritated voice of the matriarch echoed across the walls of the house, giving goosebumps to those who were unused, that is, Harry and me.

- It's always like that? - I asked slightly intimidated to the boy with glasses next to me.

- You haven't seen anything yet - said Ron as he passed us on the stairs and went down to face his mother's anger over some mess he had made.

We were 12 years old and I couldn't say that we were close friends, who would be friends with the daughter of a murderous traitor? Why did they invite me? I didn't even remember.

- And where do you want to go? I've heard of several good places to live in the countryside - the smell of tea brought me to reality and then I noticed his gaze under me.

- Well, I'm going to spend some time in the United States - I replied with the confidence that still remained in my body, if it had been in another situation I would have found the expression of surprise on her face really amusing.

We stayed for a few seconds in silence drinking tea until she answered me a little more calmly.

- If you're sure, I can only tell you to take care and keep in touch. I understand that this adaptation period has not been easy for any of us. If that's what you need to heal yourself ... - her face fell a bit and I noticed right away.

- Do you want to hear about the place where I'm staying? - I asked with a small smile and little by little she got excited again.

As I did not want to bother her beyond the point I already was, after the tea we said goodbye with a hug still in the kitchen, when we arrived in the living room we hugged again and I had the same feeling as when I hugged Andromeda earlier. I never had a mother and after so long, it seems that I got two maternal figures who really cared about me.

- Don't forget to send me a lot of pictures, okay? - before I could answer, we both turned around as soon as we heard a noise on the stairs.

There was no one there and even if there was, it would be difficult to distinguish a silhouette in the middle of the darkness formed in that area, but for a few seconds I managed to see an unowned foot before it disappeared.

- I really need to go Molly, can you tell the others that I'll be in touch soon, please? - she confirmed with a smile and I left without giving a second look at that staircase.

Why was he spying and listening to the conversation? My life has been around the actions of Harry Potter for a long time, but it has been years since the direct contact was over, until now. Why now? Why do I have to remember him again? Why do I have to walk around being a shadow of what I once was?

- Can you sit down and talk to me? - His voice sounded irritated for no plausible reason.

- Oh sure, do you want me to sit and listen to all the reasons why you don’t love me anymore? Do you want to put more salt on the wound or what? - my usual sarcasm was multiplied by 1000, even though I knew that Harry hated that.

I didn't wait for an answer and immediately left his empty dormitory towards the Gryffindor common room, which by luck or a lot of planning on his part, was also empty.

- You know that I have strong feelings for you, but not as befor- can you grow a little at least once? - his steps came behind me and I felt his gaze piercing my back, until I couldn't take it anymore and I turned to look at him.

- You already made your point clear yesterday Harry, if you want to break up alright, but I will not be silent hearing about how you fell in love with another girl- and for the first time he did not answer me back - Yeah, do you really think that I wouldn't notice? I was the first to see it, believe it or not. My mistake was to close my eyes and pretend that everything was fine between us.

He found no words to answer me and I was too tired to hear anything else.

- I will return your things and you can feel free to do whatever you want to, our conversation is over.

Some women passed behind me in the bathroom, I knew what was going on in their heads, "what's wrong with her?" or "why is she crying?" but I didn't mind and kept looking straight into that foggy airport mirror.

As soon as the door slammed and I knew I was alone for a few minutes, I closed my eyes and then made a promise to myself.

- I'll be back and I won't even remember why I had to forget you in the first place.

Harry Potter Masterlist

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unluckyxse7en-moving · 4 years

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Can I ask a question? I have been wondering stuff about myself and in the panel where it says "before 'me' disappeared." it stuck out to me. I've never had a good grip on who I am and figured I had to build it. Idk hat that is. Nor do I expect you to answer that. My question is, could you explain it more?

Yes, absolutely, you’re totally welcome to ask! and idk how well I can explain it but I’ll do my best based on my current personal understanding and experience! obligatory disclaimer, many systems have unique experiences and it’s not always consistent or cut and dry from system to system, but if something about this does hit home I encourage you to look into researching it more as you feel comfortable! Also a heads up, I’m going to probably overexplain terms and concepts since I’m not sure what you do know, plus if someone else reading this isn’t familiar I figure that may help them too, so bear with me! ^^ (this got incredibly long and incredibly personal, I hope that’s ok! We’ve found hearing about personal experiences from others always helped give us a way to compare our experience better in ways that medical definitions don’t help with, so we got detailed in hopes it’ll be helpful to someone. heads up, there’s some references to feelings of unreality.)

Gonna try to put this under a cut since it got so long, let’s hope tumblr cooperates!

So admittedly, I was intrigued when you sent this line in, because while I’ve reread this comic a couple times before posting it, I didn’t remember writing a line exactly like that. As it turns out, the writing was meant to say “when ‘He’ disappeared” but it’s really oddly unclear whether it’s an H or an M at first glance compared to the rest of the script? If I’m honest I actually prefer your interpretation better, especially because the ambiguity lends more to the comic’s meaning in retrospect. I’m not gonna say something like ‘oh one of my alters must’ve done that on purpose’ because back then our handwriting was just an inconsistent mess in general and the most involvement we could probably credit to the alters was just one person tried to write that H in their handwriting when someone else was supposed to be writing it. But I thought that was an interesting case of serendipity so I couldn’t help pointing it out lmao

That said, I think your reading actually makes just as much sense in the context of the comic, and is a phenomenon I think I can readily explain that I have had a little experience with. Currently, my system setup is a little bit like an archeological dig. The alters that have surfaced the most, who have been the ones in charge of actions/words/emotional responses/etc, aka ‘fronted’, are all the ones who have formed in more recent years. The ones from years past are further back, and harder to access because we’ve developed a protective setup where the newer alters act as barricades to keep the older ones from being more exposed to trauma, or anything else they can’t handle. At its core, that’s what the function of a system is - to develop other alters who can handle situations more vulnerable parts can’t - but not all systems are built with an onion-layer setup like mine either, so just keep that in mind.

That said, since I’m built with an onion-layer setup, that means most of my system experience is based upon those older alters being shielded and walled up. When you add enough layers, we can’t dig them out again and for us that’s where most of our ‘disappearance’ comes in that we know of. There’s another phenomenon that could cause the ‘disappearance’ effect but we’ll touch on that in a moment. In our case, we just eventually feel so distanced from who “I” was supposed to be, whoever that is. Very few of the ones who have been out in recent months are from older times. We’ve had a small handful who are from our high school years (we’re 25 now), and maybe caught a glimpse of alters older than that once or twice. We very rarely remember much of the time from that far back, and what we do remember feels incredibly detached. Almost more like we saw it in a first person pov movie rather than actually been there. We’ve gone through name changes a couple times by now, and I highly suspect that those name changes are further reflective of our archeological layers and who we decided to try to model our collective behavior around, to try to seem like one whole person.

“Erika” was a girl who behaved one way. “Erin” was someone who behaved another way. and “Cleo” has been our current blueprint for who we’re supposed to be on the outside when being incognito. And what’s interesting is that you mentioned feeling like you had to ‘build’ yourself, because while it’s not so precise or in our control, we’ve approached it much the same way. For each name change it was like different models. out with the old model and in with the new, now introducing Cleo v2.0, with these personality patches and old bugs fixed. Around the time we changed to Erin, we had firmly decided we wanted to put our ‘old self’ behind us and improve ourselves. We had come out of toxic experiences eyes open, and we were terrified of reflecting that internalized toxicity outward. So we took ourselves to the metaphorical workshop, and spent many many years scrutinizing who ‘Erika’ was under a microscope for our faults, our flaws, what made us work that way, so that we could iron out the kinks when introducing ‘Erin’. As we took ‘Erin’ for test runs in college, we would find different flaws and faults that needed fixing, so once we’d accumulated a comprehensive list of those we took Erin in for workshopping and shortly after we dropped out of college, out came Cleo. Our entire life experience from the outside has been a long-running fixer-upper project, and for a while we were proud of ourselves to see the long strides in improvements we’d made upon “myself”, for being so quick to see our flaws and find ways to manage them.

But what was really happening under the hood was, we weren’t actually changing as an individual, cohesive person. We were adapting and forming new alters, or at the very least reassigning them based on who handled what better - so if we had become sick of our short temper, we swapped that alter out so that what normally caused them to respond, would instead elicit someone less volatile and slower to anger. If one of us froze up at the sight of blood, they would be swapped out of the front for someone who had no problems with it. This is why we ended up onion-layering ultimately, to lower the risk of the other alters being in front at poorly timed moments.

So tl;dr for us, a lot of our ‘Disappearance’ of our selves was us trading them out or hiding them away, and most likely encouraging a state of alter dormancy - when alters become inactive for long periods of time. (for some of us we describe it like sleeping - I think it tires us out on a physical level if one alter is active too long, it probably works certain parts of the brain more depending on the alter, but that’s all speculation.)

Backtracking a little - there is another experience that would cause a more definite and permanent ‘Disappearance’ effect. We haven’t experienced it since coming out as a system to ourselves. But we’re pretty sure we experienced it once, or twice, way back when. It’s formally known as Fusion. Fusion is what happens when two or more alters end up “physically” (for lack of a better word) merging together. They cannot separate, and they become an entirely different alter. The new alter often has some elements of their components in terms of personality traits and memories, but also isn’t a complete merging of everything. Memories and emotional attachments can often get lost in the process. This is where the other Disappearance can occur.

We know it happened to us at least once. Somewhere around middle or high school, for no apparent reason, we had developed an acute awareness and fear of Amnesia, and the identity death that would inevitably come with it. We were always scared, what if we hit our head and lost our memory? What would we remember, if anything? Would we get it back? Media always dramatizes amnesia, where amnesiac characters have some twinge, some spark, where they get drawn to things super important to them from before the memory loss. Would that happen to us? What if it didn’t? What if we never remembered the things that mattered so dearly to us? Would we even be the same person anymore?

If you compare that to the concept of fusion, it’s almost uncomfortably spot on. But we had no idea about systems or fusion back then. Which can only mean we had experienced a fusion, and somehow that caused a disturbance in the system that led to that latent fear to hang over our heads, along with the constant feelings of unreality and dreaming that followed us all through high school.

But somewhere along the line, just as suddenly as that fear developed, it just. Dissipated. It’s still a terrifying concept for us. But we no longer obsess over it like we did back then. We also suspect that’s probably related to another fusion of sorts. We have no clue who they were, or who they are now though.

So to tie it all back in, in the comic the ‘Me/He’ disappearing would be parallel to an alter going dormant, or possibly fusing. The characters the protagonist and Tormenter are built around were originally part of a storyline of two separate identities that ended up ‘fusing’ to form a different whole, and while I can’t say the comic is faithful to the scientific or actual experience in a system, since I didn’t know about it at the time, I’m pretty sure it was based on what I had picked up on in my subconscious, so that’s the implications there, inaccurate representation though they may be. I have heard from a few sources that fusion is often the result of a necessary function, to help protect or help an alter that can no longer function or cope the way they have been by creating a new alter that can cope better, so with this understanding, and the direction of the comic, it makes a sort of sense.

These are my thoughts in regards to your question about ‘disappearance’ in the context of the comic based on my personal experiences, I hope it helped! Feel free to ask more or send in followup questions or statements, hopefully now that I’ve given a lot of context I won’t be quite so long-winded haha

#long post #personal #blablablah #osdd #actuallyosdd #actuallyplural #did #anon #versus #gonna make that my tag for the comic and q's related to it!#ask and ye shall receive #ps - sorry i took so long to respond! I've been off all day trying to pack for something fjdgndj

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