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obessedwithfictionalmen · 2 months

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Co-Stars pt.8

Callum Turner X Actress! Reader

Summary: A bad joke is made about Y/n and Callum won't stand for it.

Warning: Joe Koy/ Swearing/ use of Y/n/ mention of being naked

Word count: 1.1k

Yn's outfit:

Award season was going well, she won an Emmy and now she was nominated for a Golden Globes for Best Performance by a Female Action in a Drama series. Unlike the Emmy’s, she was now nominated as if she was a main character, and it was amazing. The cast walked on the red carpet, again, getting yelled at by photographers. ‘’Good luck tonight, Y/n, I hope you win!’’ one yelled. It made the woman smile. ‘’Boys how does it feel to work with this amazing woman’’ without saying a word, they all start to kneel, to pay their respect to her. ‘’Oh my god’’ Y/n laughs. She takes a pose for the photographers and the boys get up. ‘’I love you guys’’ she says to her co-stars.

They didn’t know who the presenter was, so Y/n had to google him, but at the same time, Florence Pugh came to the table and asked for a photo with her. Her phone was towards the camera, her google research was exposed. But the ceremony started, Y/n was nervous, she was against really good actress, like Emma Stone and Bella Ramsey. ‘’Now Master of the Air was amazing! But I didn’t get why each time we saw Y/n on screen, we saw her naked, I mean, was the only purpose of her character, being naked? You’re playing in a series about WW2, not Sex Education’’ that was supposed to be a joke, but no one laughed. Y/n was looking at the presenter with a death stare before taking a sip of his drink. Joe nervously laughed. ‘’Sorry about that’’ he continued his speech but when he ‘apologized’ the camera went on Y/n and Callum. ‘’You better be sorry, asshole’’ Callum mumbled. He hid his mouth when he insulted him, but he didn’t understand why he thought making this joke was supposed to be fun. ‘’He clearly didn’t watch the hole show’’ Austin said to Y/n, which made her smile.

‘’And the winner is…’’ her heart was going to burst out of her chest. ‘’Y/n Y/l/n for her role in Master of the Air’’ She got up her chair, kissed Callum, hugged Austin and Antony, took off her shoes and made her way to the stage. She hugged Meryl Streep, she was presenting the award, when Y/n got to Joe, she didn’t hug him. She took the statue and came closer to the mic. ‘’Oh my god, wow, thank you so much. That’s amazing!’’ her voice cracked from the emotions. The crowd cheered for her. ‘’This series means so much to me, my wonderful co-stars, I love you so much. I don’t want to say the same thing as my other speech, because I did more than being naked in every scene, so I won awards, and people actually know who I am.’’ The crowd laughed at the comeback for the woman. Joe faked laugh and looked at the ground. ‘’To all the people out there, that are scared to pursue their dreams, don’t give up. You can do it, dreams come true! I got men kneeling for me, I won awards, and I got made fun of on national television! Thank you and good night!’’ she said, making the crowd laugh again. Callum was so proud of his girl; she stood up for herself and she did it the funniest way possible.

‘’The Golden Globe for the best drama Television Series goes to…’’ Drew Barrymore opened the envelope, the cast all held hands, silently praying. ‘’Master of the Air!’’ she exclaimed, stomping around in excitement. The cast got up, followed by Tom Hanks, Steven Spielberg and Gary Goetzman. When they all got on stage, the trophy was handed to Gary. Callum and Y/n held hands; it was special to be on stage together. ‘’Wow! Thank you so much, this is amazing! This T.V show is, I think, really important to understand history and its darker parts. I’m going to stop talking or I’ll take all the time’’ Gary laughed. The mic was given to Tom Hanks. ‘’Like Gary said, this series is the third, we did Band of Brothers and The Pacific, but Master of the Air is the last and to see it getting so much recognition fills my heart with joy’’ he said, tears in his eyes. Steven stepped forward to talk. ‘’Thank you to everyone that made this project happen, to our beautiful cast, thank you for accepting to follow our crazy idea, love you all’’ he blew kiss to us. Austin stepped forward. ‘’Thank you so much. This type of series, uh, I think, needs to be done so the next generation can understand what really went down. Thank you so much!’’ Y/n smiled; Callum stepped forward. ‘’And finally, thank you to everyone that really watched the show and saw that Y/n wasn’t always naked!’’ that made the cast laugh. A Y/n face palmed, but she was happy to see that the joke wasn’t forgotten and that the guys didn’t like it. ‘’Yeah! Y/n is amazing!’’ Barry quickly said. The woman laughed as they all left stage. Backstage, they all hugged, even the directors joined in. ‘’I’m so proud of all of you.’’ Tom Hanks said.

‘’So, Y/n, a picture came out, can you explain what you were googling’’ the journalist asked, making the woman laugh. ‘’Uh, I didn’t know who Joe Koy was, so I looked him up’’ she simply said. ‘’About the joke he made, your co-stars became protective, what does it mean for you?’’ she was tired of this question, each interview station, they asked that question. ‘’Personally, I thought it was low, I mean, it wasn’t the fact that she was naked that made her win an Emmy and a Golden Globe, so yeah. But I think he learned his lesson’’ Callum answered. Y/n smiled and leaned her head against him. ‘’Thank you, good night’’ the journalist said. They could finally leave this place. Y/n has her statue in her hand, it was really beautiful. ‘’It’s going to fit perfectly beside my Emmy award’’ she said in the limousine. Making her co-star giggle. ‘’Like we told you before, we got your back, we weren’t going to let him disrespect you like that’’ Anthony said. Y/n thanked him as they made their way to the after party.

#callum turner #callum turner x reader #callum turner imagine #master of the air #golden globes

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httpstes · 1 year

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ੈ✩‧₊˚ Random things that remind me of Venus in Water signs <33 *ੈ✩‧₊˚

: ̗̀➛ Cancer venus

Moon goddess, white cupcakes, soft makeup, pastels, twinkling stars, ball gowns, sleeping beauty, Bridgeton, velvet dresses, aurora borealis, moonstone, labradorite, ex lovers, childhood crushes, historical events that for some reason bring you a lot of nostalgia, warm cardigans, rosy cheeks, plump lips, angel wings, tattoos that are aesthetically pleasing but also have some rlly deep meaning behind them..in saying that probably has tattoos that are related to their loved ones, mini skirts, crescent moon, autumn leaves, picnics in the park, constantly getting hit by nostalgia then crying about your childhood, sad/serene resting face, calm river flow in forests, doll eyes, cathedrals, atonement, victorian homes and decor, mid-western gothic towns, struggling to live in the present because you’re in a constant state of reminiscing on the past, red and white candles, love spells, love sick, Ludus (playful love) and Agape (love for everyone), learning that unconditional love has its consequences.

: ̗̀➛ Scorpio venus

The mystics, love magick, killer smile, captivating love, people are addicted to you and the way you love, possession, the goth kids from southpark 😭, the hot detective in crime/horror films, small snowy village, probably went through a creepypasta phase, alex g, rlly cool piercings, coraline, uniquely shaped snowflakes, ending up on the scary side of Ao3, twitter, tumblr on multiple occasions, whimsigothic clothes, bela lugosi's dead, american horror story, finding solace in painful memories, joe goldberg (derogatory), exploring abandoned buildings, dark crystal, Evanescence, religious imagery, cathedrals, questionable taste in people, alluring eyes, creepy cute dolls, interest in the paranormal, sirens and pixies, deftones, obsidian, malachite, lavenders, twilight, overgrown houses.

: ̗̀➛ Pisces venus

shells, frozen lakes, Falls for the wrong people, likes the idea of light and dark energy.. yin and yang.. opposites attract type of beat, gives out too much love, normally the medic or healer in video games, always there for moral support, grandfather clocks, mermaids, poison tree by grouper, randomly remembering early childhood memories, angel numbers, spiritual/astrological tattoos, auras, maladaptive daydreaming, falling for the idea you create of people, kogal gyaru or Himegyaru, snails or turtles both seem very wise :), castles, the backrooms LMAO, angels, water lilies, american horror story (specifically the coven and hotel season), ENA, blindly following a cult or being the cult leader, playing in an empty park, rainbows, cottages, persephone and hades, blue lace agate, aquamarine, mazzy star, the cure, koi fish.

<<Hello everyone sorry for my long hiatus! It has finally come to an end!! School has already started for me so I’ll try post once a week however that’s just me saying shit and it’s not guaranteed 😭 I hope everyone has been doing well :))>>

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prettyboysdontlookatexplosions · 1 month

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Here's what I believe about that play: We all want to believe that we are Harper and Prior, these magical wounded heroes who, despite cannons being fired at us, find in our weakness, our madness, our sickness, all this miraculous strength. We even want to believe that if we're a bad guy we're Roy, the bad guy who says the cool shit.

Most people are Joe and Louis. We are all Joe and Louis: We are weak and liars. And I love those characters for that.

david cromer (director of and louis in the 1998 journeymen production; director of the 2015 kansas city rep production), quoted in the world only spins forward: the ascent of angels in america, by isaac butler and dan kois

#a lot of very quotable lines in this book but this is the first one i've felt to sit and type up #media 2k24

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xnchxntmxnt · 8 months

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Hey! May I ask for a pt 2 of the "skating in heels" piece you wrote, please? No pressure if you don't want to do it!

WHEW OKAY anon. Love ya. Thank you for the request. I forgot it was there for several months im sorry 😭 forgive me

Characters: Kojiro Nanjo, Langa Hasegawa

Warnings: above text if needed

gn reader

reblogs > likes

send an ask to join my taglist

part one

Kojiro “Joe” Nanjo

Small warning: talk of injuries but its in a light hearted and teasing way, nothing graphic

Alright

See this guy

He’s gonna think its impressive

Clapping, cheering, the whole bit

You can probably sense a but coming

BUT

He’s watching and he’s like

That cant be THAT hard

Ahaha yeah. Sure joe

So you scour the internet trying to find him a pair for 2in heels (start a little easy on him)

They usually dont make heels in his size but dammit, youre stubborn, you find some. Theyre international shipping so you gotta pay the extra money and wait a little longer, but he tested you and now he gets to reap the benefits

Honestly, i love being petty with kojiro because he wouldn’t get upset he just matches your energy

So these heels come and you take him to a skate park on a less busy night when there aren’t any teenagers around. And bring a helmet just in case

“I haven't worn a helmet skating since i was sixteen!” “I know, and you got a concussion two weeks later. Wear it”

So he does, but makes fun of you for it endlessly

Until he falls on his ass coming down off the halfpipe and slams his head into the concrete. So he was happy for it then

Now he just has a bruised butt and ego, but no bruised BRAIN

(dont get concussions kids, i did and it was not fun)

He gets up, dusts himself off, and grumbles something about how he put his foot in the wrong place and he’ll get it next time

(he’s not used to the gap between the heel of the shoe and his toes. Makes a difference)

After making some excuses he tries again. Falls again, and this time its because “the shoes aren’t broken in”

Several tries and excuses later, he gives up and puts his sneakers back on. He respects your ability a lot more after that

Langa “Snow” Hasegawa

Shocked pikachu face

Not much more i can say

Langa is a man of few words and i think he’d just stand there staring at you

You decided to show off to him & reki at the skate park randomly one day (they were very curious what the shoes were for) and pull a couple small tricks on the board

Reki’s all sorts of excited and cheering for you because he’s never seen someone DO that before

Langa just. Sits there mouth slightly open

(gets made fun of for it gently lol)

When youre done and skate back over langa begins spinning you around and checking you for injuries or anything because “that can be very dangerous” and he’s worried about you skating in shoes that are not meant to be skated in

But when he’s finally satisfied and knows that youre okay and didn’t pull anything he’s slightly smiley

“That’s very impressive”

“Thanks, langa”

Proceeds to talk about it for the next SEVERAL days with reki, but doesn’t tend to bring it up with you. No one’s sure why, but he just cant stop singing your praises when you’re not around

Not out of malice, he just does that. Talks a lot about the people he loves when theyre not there. Cute habit of his

He thinks youre so cool though and loves to watch you skate when you put your heels on (or just watch you skate in general

taglist

@grays321 @dear-koi @sirimirihiro @momoewn @poeberlyavenue

#//ɪɴʙᴏx #//ᴏʀɪɢɴᴀʟ ᴡᴏʀᴋꜱ #//ʜᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴᴏɴꜱ #sk8 #sk8 the infinity #sk8 the infinity x reader #kojiro nanjo #kojiro nanjo x reader #kojiro nanjo x gn reader #joe #joe sk8 #langa hasegawa #langa #langa x gn reader #langa x reader #langa hasegawa x reader #langa hasegawa x gn reader

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choke-me-joey · 1 year

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hi babe! could you write something about Joe spending christmas with you and your family? Some fluff so you don’t have to write the word cock for a second 😂

GIRL LET ME TELL YOU I CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH COCK

...that's what she said

This turned out to be longer than I imagined, and I hope it meets your expectations. I actually have a smut prompt request for visiting family at Christmas which I think will follow this perfectly 🥰 but for now....WE FLUFF!

You wished you'd driven. It would have given you something to focus your mind on, other than your all consuming panic about what was to come. Your leg wouldn't stop bloody bouncing.

Joe was nervous too, although he didn't let on. You could tell because he'd changed his outfit 4 times before you'd left.

It was just over an hour and a half's drive to your parent's house. You and Joe had been invited there to spend Christmas eve, Christmas Day and Boxing Day with your mum, dad and 3 older brothers. Joe had actually paid for his own parents to go abroad this Christmas, so you didn't have to worry about splitting the time between both families. Besides, you'd already met his family.

This was Joe's first time meeting yours.

"So when you bringing Eddie home, then, Y/N?" Your older brother Jack had teased over the family Zoom call a few months ago.

"Shut up, his name is Joe." You'd said through gritted teeth. You loved your brothers, really you did, but God they loved to pick on you as the baby and only girl of the family.

"Still don't believe that you're actually dating him," your second oldest brother Tom laughed and you rolled your eyes. "What? We haven't actually spoken to him yet, he's conveniently always busy when we have our calls every week."

"Hey, leave her alone, not her fault her big time actor boyfriend is never home." The sarcasm in your eldest brother Charlie's voice made you scowl.

"Well, I've spoken to him, and he seems perfectly lovely. Leave your sister alone, boys." Your mum sighs, shooting you a small soft smile.

"Why don't you invite him for Christmas, Y/N? We'd love to meet him." Your dad offers and your stomach sinks as your brother's faces all break out into grins.

"Yeah, go on, Y/N, we've gotta meet this famous boyfriend of yours." laughs Tom. "Give him the old big brother talk."

"If I bring him home, you are absolutely not doing that, or I'm telling your girlfriend about the time you came home drunk, pissed in the pond and killed our koi."

That shut him up.

You had asked Joe if he wanted to come, and he didn't hesitate in saying yes. In fact he seemed quite excited about it, but as the time grew closer he was definitely getting nervous as you briefed him on your family, so when he offered to drive, you thought maybe it was best to let him concentrate on that and let you do the worrying.

"So...Jack is 2 years older than you, right?" Joe asked you, as the sat nav informed him he had 5 miles left on the motorway.

"Jack is 2 years older than me, yeah, then Tom is 4 years older, and Charlie is 5 years older. Even though he's the oldest, he's the most chill out of the 3 lads. It's actually Jack who's the gobby one. Him and Tom used to fight all the time growing up."

"Right, good to know, don't piss off Jack. Or Tom. Or Charlie. Or anyone in your family." You could see his grip tighten on the steering wheel ever so slightly. You place a hand on his knee.

"We can turn around and go home if you don't wanna do this, Joe."

"Y/N, I'll be fine. Besides, I'm in this for the long haul, so I have to at least convince your dad to like me." Joe grins, taking your hand in his and kissing it, making you melt in your seat.

When you arrive at your parents, you catch a glimpse of your brothers at the window. You glare at them and your mum comes up behind them, yanking them all away. She shoots you another little smile and you wave at her.

"Come on, let's get this bit over with and we'll get the bags later." You say raking Joe's hand in yours and walking up the front path and opening the door. Your mum descends on you with an excited little squeal, hugging you tightly. She then turns to Joe.

"And you must be Joseph! It's nice to put such a handsome face to a name and voice!" As if she wasn't a massive Stranger Things fan. Flirt. She gives him a little hug. "We're so happy to have you here."

"Thank you so much, Mrs Y/L/N. You have a really lovely home. And it's just Joe, please." He smiles, ever the charmer. Your dad and brothers then make an appearance, all looking at bit menacing. Your dad comes over and hugs you tightly, offering his hand out to Joe, who shakes it.

"Nice to meet you, Joe, we've heard lots about you."

"Thank you sir, likewise."

"Ah, none of the sir stuff, lad," your dad then tells him to call his by his name. "And I suppose I better let these 3 reprobates introduce themselves."

Your brothers, shockingly, make very polite introductions and say how happy they are to meet him.

"Want a drink, Joe?" Charlie asks holding up a bottle of beer for your boyfriend, who gladly accepts.

"Come on mate, we'll show you around." Jack says, gesturing through to the kitchen.

"Dad, go with them!" You hiss, well aware of your brothers' intentions on getting Joe alone. Your dad chuckles and follows them, leaving your mum and you in hallway. You sigh. "Oh my god."

"Oh, darling, he's so lovely!" Your mum grins at you, giving you a squeeze. "So much more handsome than he looks on TV! And so well spoken!"

"Mum, your fangirl is showing." You laugh, following her into the kitchen and watching as the 5 men walk around your parent's large garden. Jack gestures to the pond, and says something, making all 5 of them laugh. "He's telling the koi story isn't he."

A few hours later, you and Joe had settled in and you were sat in the living room with your family, chatting after a lovely dinner you helped your mum to prepare.

"So, Joe, tell us about yourself. And nothing obvious, mate, we already know who you are." Charlie says, although he's not mean about it. "Although, if you could tell me if Eddie is really dead or not that would earn you serious brownie points."

"Charlie!" You hiss, kicking him.

Joe laughs, rubbing the back of his neck.

"As much as I want to, mate, I have no idea." Your family makes a noise of disappointment. "I'm sorry, I wish I could tell you!"

"Ignore them, Joe, please! I do." Your mum calls from the kitchen and you laugh. Joe smiles at you, slipping his hand into yours and squeezing gently.

He was so much more relaxed than he was earlier, and it warmed your heart to see him getting on with your family so well.

The next afternoon, after a beautiful quiet Christmas morning, you were surrounded by family members, including grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. You had warned Joe that Christmas was always a big thing at your home, but you don't think he really understood just how big.

Joe was currently chatting to your dad, your grandad and some of your older cousins as you sat on the sofa with your 3 month old baby cousin Sophia in your arms, her mum, your mum and your aunty all sat around with you watching some of the older children playing with their new toys.

"That's a beautiful necklace, Y/N, was that a Christmas present?" Your cousin, the baby's mum, asks, taking a sip of Prosecco.

You glance down at the silver chain hanging around your neck, so delicate you'd forgotten it was there.

"Oh, yeah, it's from Joe," you smile running a finger over it. "He got it for me whilst he was in Italy."

Your mum, cousin and aunty all exchange looks. "What?"

"Nothing, Y/N, love," your aunty smiles over the lip of her glass. "He's a keeper, I think."

"Oh I don't plan on getting rid of him any time soon." You smile at him across the room and he comes over, kissing you on top of your head. "Want a cuddle?" You gesture to the sleeping baby in your arms.

"Is that alright?" Joe looks at your cousin.

"Yeah, of course! Gives me a break, she's a right little leech at the moment, Y/N has a magic touch so it seems."

You stand up so Joe can take your seat.

"Sit back, use the arm of the sofa to support your arm and her head...that's it," you say softly as you pass Sophia over to him, helping him to adjust so he could hold her correctly. You're pretty sure your knees almost give way as you stand back up and take in the sight of your beautiful boyfriend holding a beautiful baby. You sit on the sofa arm next to him, both of you looking down at Sophia. You see a flash out of the corner of your eye and look up; your cousin had taken a photo, a massive grin on her face.

"She's so tiny," Joe said softly, looking up at you. "What should I do with her?"

"Just hold her, she's pretty milk drunk right now so she'll be out for a bit." You giggle, pushing some of his curls away from his face and kissing his forehead.

"Do you want kids, Joe?" Asks your aunt and you shoot her a look. You know what she's doing.

"Up until about 5 minutes ago, I wasn't too sure, but uh, yeah I do." He says, unable to take his eyes off of Sophia.

"I'll get you another drink," you say, kissing the top of his head again and heading into the kitchen to top your own glass up and get him another beer.

As you were pouring your drink, a pair of arms wrap around your waist. You smile as Joe kisses your shoulder. "Are you having a good time?" You ask him, moving him with you as you get some ice from the freezer.

"The best, your family are brilliant." Joe says into your shoulder. "You?"

"Mmhm." You turn and hand him his beer. He pecks your lips in thanks. "Speaking of my family, you never told me what my brothers said to you yesterday. I sent my dad out for backup. I know what they're like, they've scared off boyfriends in the past."

"You mean there were others before me?!" Joe feigns shock, clutching his chest. You laugh, shoving him gently. "Well, yeah they gave me the old 'what are your intentions with our baby sister' talk before your dad made it outside."

"Oh? And you're still here...impressive." You grin and he plays it coy, shrugging. "So what are your intentions with me, Joseph Quinn?"

He moves behind you, one arm around your waist, steering you so you can see into the living room, where your cousin had her baby back in her arms and her husband was stood with her, both of them cooing over Sophia who had just woken up.

You tilt your head to look at him. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." His lips then meet yours, sealing the unspoken promise.

#joseph quinn x you #joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn fluff #ask #answered #fluff #joseph quinn imagine #joseph quinn x y/n #joseph quinn

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4ugust · 1 year

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all of the references in the lavender haze music video:

1. mastermind

2. sagittarius (taylor) and pisces (joe) constellations

3. midnights vinyl

4. incense on a vinyl shelf (maroon)

5. a clock that strikes midnight

6. midnight rain forecast

7. inez? “your ex-friend’s sister” girl?

8. koi fish like the speak now tour guitar

#i feel like im missing a lot #lavender haze #midnights #tsmidnights #taylor swift #swifties #taylorswift13 #taylornation #taylurking #jaylor

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joeinct · 1 year

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#joe bruha

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strawbs-screaming · 6 months

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Punch out boxers and what pet(s) they would have

hey bestie, exam season is almost over so im recovering a bit so why not give this to you all??

Glass Joe - small, fluffy and cute white cat that is the spawn of satan, knocking shit over, eating your food, wrecking the couch, massacring the toilet paper, all while looking adorable, named "Bouffon", sometimes called bonbon because of it

Von Kaiser - a doberman thats scary as shit but a complete angel, very loud barks when scared but very cute otherwise, named "Turm"

Disco Kid - an african grey parrot that never shuts up, really cool but still the spawn of hell to a certain point, always singing or quoting stuff,named "Angel"

King Hippo - a capybara & a turtle, he lets the capybara on his bed and the turtle has its own pond, both of them are pretty chill and the most evil they do is just bumping into doors, the capybara is named "coco" since Hippo made a hat for it using a coconut shell, the turtle is named "Reef" since he ran out of ideas

Piston Hondo - some koi fish & a praying mantis, he has a pond for his fish and decorates it, meditating there when the weathers right, the praying mantis has its own terrarium and doesnt let it out unless he has to change up something since hes paranoid about crushing it, the koi fish dont have names but the praying mantis is named "リーフ" (Leaf) since he found it fighting some bug on a leaf

Bear Hugger - besides the squirrel (we dont count mrs bear since shes more of a friend and it would be rude to call her a pet)he has a pet snail and a rabbit, the snail is one of his first pets and he got it when he first started his boxing career and found it in the showers after a match, its named "squeaky" because of that, he actually found the rabbit not too long ago after feeding it some dandelions, it just came over to his house on a daily basis after a while and he accepted it, the rabbits named "Dandy" since bear hugger saw it eating a dandelion and ran with it

Great Tiger - has a pet snake & a gecko, the snake has a pattern somewhat reminiscent of a tiger with its Orange & Black stripes, despite its fierce appearance, its pretty shy and hides a lot, the gecko is the opposite of that: it may look not very intimidating but its a menace, the snake is named "tiger" (how creative) and the gecko is named "Woob", aran came up with the name after taking a glare at it and just saying "woob."

Don Flamenco - other than the spider that carmen owns, he has a pet goldfish named "Fish" that he he just feeds and fucks off, he has 0 emotional attachment to it, he could see it dead and he would go "damn sucks to suck" And move on, hes not the one for pets

Aran Ryan - a mountain lion he thought was just a really big cat, he gave it a bath, fed it some meat and just adopted it, it doesnt really mind but its like... really confused, aran named it "princess", the way he found out was him inviting bear hugger over and seeing him go "IS THAT A FUCKING MOUNTAİN LION" the moment princess walked out of the bathroom after eating the toilet paper again

Soda Popinski - a husky thats absolutely running from place to place 99% of the time, its sometimes a bit mishievious but pretty well behaved, its named "soda" since thats pretty much his idea of a cute name

Bald Bull - a lazy fat ass street cat that sleeps most of the time or just eats food, its mishievious but not enough to bother moving, its suprisingly good at opening cabinets and eating to its own hearts content, he really has no way to stop it, named "Tombili"

Super Macho Man - a shi tzu named "puffy" that likes to nibble on wood, its very fluffy since he takes great care to brush it

Mr Sandman - Not the type own a pet since hes indecisive about it, had a few pet goldfish before but thats about it for him

#punch out #headcanon #punch out wii #punch out headcanons #aran ryan #bald bull #don flamenco #glass joe #piston hondo #great tiger #“Why do you sound so robotic” i come off like that naturally broski

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missmayhemvr · 1 month

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How Europe underdeveloped Africa and its legacy

first and formost before i break this down, this is not a post for white people to express their guilt, or savoir complex or love of historical revisionism. you'll not just be blocked, you'll go on a block list on this post, don't do it to yourself, i wont even have to be the one to do it. secondly this is a covering of the broad themes, lessons, and understanding within the book and what we should learn from it. third, i will often talk from my own perspective from which i will round to a larger context.

part 1- history and anthropology

As someone who has grown up black in the us, i grew up with a particular understanding or idea of Africa, the slave trade and the way America and Europe came about. you hear about tribal or ethnic disputes in the context of modern Africa and hear quite a lot of blatantly racist things about Africans. which caused me to get very into history, to which you learn when it comes to Africa there's not a lot of great places to start. this is something quite similar to the various indigenous peoples of the Americas as well. this has always been presented to me as a fault of Africans for not having history and is a long standing idea of white intellectuals from the 1800s to the Joe every man of today. the truth is Africa has history, there's no land, that has no history and Europe just devalues histories not associated with itself. there's a absolute glut of kingdoms, empires, languages, historical traditions, governing styles, cultural roles, trade networks etc etc. the fact of the matter is, that there's just very little Europeans want to learn about Africa that isn't to colonial ends, even today.

This is something Walter covers in great detail, to such a point that even as someone that has been purposely elbows deep into listening to everything i can find on African history i still had to go look up various pre-colonial kingdoms and figures. there is not a region of Africa that he doesn't take time to address in at least some detail, from Oyo and Ashanti on the west African coast, to the north of the Maghreb with Morocco and Algeria, east to the great lakes region, the horn of africa and south to the Zulus, koi koi, and Nguni peoples and kingdoms. The extensiveness to which he covers material forms of production, trade, and methods of historical preservation of culture, the types and breath of items, created and traded all through like cloth, glass, iron working, artistic ventures like bronze sculptures of benin and food production and cultization and the formations of various styles of rule, early democracy, and other such information put to bed nearly all of the non-nonsensical ideas that africa was a grand continent without progress, innovation, or skills and everything great, large, or more complex than rubbing to sticks together came from europe or arabs.

The book delves quite deep into the mythology of intense african slavery and violence which would be later used by europeans to justify colonization of africa to each other, said colonization, i will swing around back to much as the book does.

The middle passage, the triangle trade, the atlantic slave trade, these are all names for the event that was one of the chief reason to the economic and scientific take off of europe that would lead to industrialism, with the other being the colonization of the americans. stolen land and labor pushed the european world from not much a concern to anyone but those who had to deal with the crusades to the paramount power that controlled nearly all the sea trade, and held large swaths of territories of the world. we all know most of that, but walter ask the question on the other side of that coin. what did the slave trade do to africa? and why did they participate? the short answer is it changed the entire way african economies functioned and lessened the possibility of growth not just of kingdoms over territories, but of production and developement of sectors such as iron working, glass making, and agriculture. and in a very literal sense was one of the earliest forms of the phenomenon known today as brain drain and depopulation. we quite literally will never know the amount of people stolen or killed for slavery, we only know that as the rest of the world experienced high population growth africa and the americas started to experience intense depopulation. these phenomena weren't incidental they were known, and admitted as purposeful by figures qouted in the book. The african leaders at the time how ever were stuck between a rock and a hard place, many noted not just the importance of guns, but also recognized the importance of population growth at the onset. the game however being rigged from the start would have taken a miracle to over come. japan was the one country to escape colonialism in most meaningful senses, and that was because the dutch taught them how to produce guns and would trade with them "almost" as equals. these are also things addressed by rodney, the sale of arms was often highly lopsided, with Portugal and dutch traders only being willing to trade badly produced or broken guns, low quality powder and shot for slaves. this would not change until europeans would learn of other african products that they could make us of in their markets as raw materials such as ivory or kola nuts, this change would not happen for quite a while and mainly after the Europeans had already built their industrial bases and had taken total control of trade routes and begun to flood African markets with "cheap" products. the combinations of factors both purposeful and accidental shifted the African economies into a near total reliance on Europe economically and militarily but not yet politically. these are all expertly researched and explained to a point it is nearly impossible to refute any points. This points are all also something i can confirm from nearly every single source that ive looked into on African history.

part 2 -colonial "development"

This is a portion of history ill admit to doing my best to stay away from, generally much of my knowledge on it till this book has been on what happened with various kingdoms that fell in the late 1800s and early 1900s or by the various oral and 3rd hand accounts of what peoples familes, parents and even political elites went through. ill be frank, i did not go into the depth of the horrors of what happened with slavery, slave raiding, and its secondary effects, for this section and the next ill have to go through quite a lot. ill try to tone it down as best as i can, but on some of it even the implied parts are going to be horrid. I believe it is however important to face those head on, to truly understand the so called "white mans burden" or the reality of what that meant was.

colonialism meant making the final step, taking africa politically and physically. europe made the leap whole heartly to take all of africa, land, people, and any potential valuables, resources and to exploit everything they could get their hands on to the fullest extent possible. i do not use anything in the prior sentence lightly. Europeans like to play word games and often, the idea that they ended slavery in any meaningful sense is false, and ill come back to that in the final section. during the period of colonial control europeans destroyed just about anything of the prior rulers they could, and stole anything they could. theres a likelihood in my mind that theres many and african sculpture, painting, and cloth or glass work that sits in the home of a collector that got rich off the stolen plunder of africa. these includes many villages, cities, and palaces and shires and places of worship and places of craft. whole cities were destroyed such as kumasi, taking with it histories, architectural stylings and methods of production.

during this period was the final shift from internal political and economic growth to purely serving the empires to which ones lands belonged. no longer would rulers push for education reforms or challenges on religious bodies to strengthen any part of the nation, it was a total transformation into a form of state slavery. this is as metaphorical as literal, europeans would begin to change agriculture to be primarily centered around cash crops and mining labor to which labor was forced. people were made to pay taxes in the modern sense through the wages made through said labor. these taxes were in turn used primarily to fund the upkeep of oppressive forces and funding the check books of colonial governors, an insanely tiny portion of these funds were used for anything besides extracting wealth and resources.

the various governments put little to no money, research, or development into anything but cash crops and pulling things out the ground. the only times they put money into schools, training or even medical resources for people in African, it was for better wealth extraction and always the bare minimum. i believe (don't have the book in front of me rn) west Africa (from west of chad and south of Algeria) only had one university until the late 50s. the industrial sector of Africa was near completely killed, Africans in settler areas were not allowed to own even small scale industrial machinery such as cotton gins or fruit oil extraction machines, in non-settler state areas generally only peoples brought into Africa for the purpose of being a separated class of petite boug representatives for the colonizers were allowed to own industrial machinery. electricity was mostly for those same classes of individuals, hospital access, education access, pretty much anything you need for a community to survive esp in the modern era was highly restricted from Africans. To say that Europe "developed" Africa in any sense is beyond a bold faced lie, and it was something ,Rodney points out, that Europeans were quite proud of until they started to face push back for the level of humanity and exploitation they were facing. Once they started to get pushed out they changed their tune to the lie of African development and modernization. just like the lie of ending slavery for moral reasons and invading Africa to end slavery. Speaking of ending slavery in Africa, Rodney points to several figures who openly gloated about how they ran their colonial post or corporate holdings as slave plantations. king Leopold is one of the more famous examples of it, but far from the only one, many took delight in their cruelty. famine became endemic in regions that were the origins of many foods and cultivates crops, as all the agricultural process that could be shifted to cash crops were. Roads and trains ran from the mines and plantations to the seas and very little else. Various things needed to export raw materials were built with slave labor, like a airport in Kenya built by hand, no machinery via forced labor of Kikuyu peoples

Europe's only goal in Africa was land and profits, the same as in the Americas. genocide, slavery, starvation campaigns were common tools of colonizers in Africa all the way up to today, which i will re-address in part 4.

part 3 - education, traditional and political

Education is a very clear and important part of modern life, but also for building a nation, and self dependence, so it is of no wonder than colonizers thought that it should be restricted in Africa in regards to Africans. The various quotes and framing that Europeans used to dismiss the idea that Africans should have access to any form of formal education sounds exactly like quotes pulled from the most vicious of slavers of the prior centuries in the US and Haiti. One of the most prominent ideas that was education would "spoil" Africans, was a sentiment was also expressed by slavers. this section of the book is very much facts and figures on just how little access to education there was, how little funding went into it vs the amount of profits coming out of the various regions as well as how this was over come. two of the prime ways that was done according to the book and much of what Ive heard prior, was through the use of missionary schools or independent schools. These schools were primarily funded not by the colonial governments but by the peoples seeking education, their families, and so on, with the expectation that those educated would teach the rest of the family. education how ever was shown to not really pull people out of poverty nor to really give African peoples the possibility of positions of power or influence. this was such a near universally a rule, Amilcar Cabral, revolutionary leader and agricultural engineer even spoke to his personal experiences with being educated far beyond the man in charge of him yet having zero say in his job, his boss was renownly a dumb man. This was not an uncommon thing. Rodney goes well into it, and this just exemplifies how Europeans only saw Africans as a source of cheap and "unskilled labor". Access to education even if funded by the peoples seeking education themselves was clamped down on sharply once revolution was on the wind. Those who know the patterns of history though would have known that the clamping down made that worse, it simply accelerated the wants for education, as well as for independence.

part 4 - modern Africa and modern euro/america

When the cards started to fold on empire they took many different routes to lessen the fall for power, France tried blowing thing up and killing cattle and destroying things needed for civil life, a all call for genocide against Algerians. Britian, Portugal, most of them tried the same things, but they were pushed out in some ways, and when that became obvious they turned to the small group of political insiders they rapidly trained to take over in their stead. for those that weren't under the control of the colonizers they turned to the coup and military dictatorship. very few of the revolutionary leaders of africa were able to stay in power, many turned toward methods some would call authoritarian. without the context of what was going on and how unstable the situation was for these leaders and just how quickly and violently these revolutions could be overturned, it would be easy to take these figures as just becoming despots without reason, some of them really did become despots who just started functioning as neocolonial cops. This brings us to the modern era, and the current method of colonialism not just in africa but much of the world, Neocolonialism, or as i like to call it "home rule".

European nations were not ready to give up control, but they decided they would be willing to give up the appearance of direct rule. economic decisions, the political direction of countries, borders, very little of the modern africans situation was not directly decided on by europeans or americans. financial institutions such as the world bank and IMF lend these governments that had to try and start building actual nations with functioning economies loans with interest rates they would not be able to pay back in time, with conditions that made it even hard to meet the internal goals or pay back the loans and additional conditions of economic control by the IMF for failure to pay these loans. colonial governments such as France forced nations like Mali to pay taxes till recently, and nearly all the colonial powers set the trade rules between them and their "former" colonies in Africa. very few leaders were able to chart much of a path for progress or development that met the needs of the people before these various things snatched much of the independence back away from the people, pushing Africa away from shifting toward an agricultural sector that feed the people and an industrial sector capable of growing the economies or a scientific sector able to make adjustments or provide notable push in any direction. Fifa has more say in policy when they decide to host in a country than the people or even large segments of the governments of Africa. Nkrumah and Rodney both in their respective titles showcase this well, however neither would live to see much past the end of overt colonial rule.

Today there is a larger push against neocolonial rule and economic control than prior, organizations such as BRICS, china's one belt one road policy, and smaller grass roots works and various coups have shifted us to a different situation in Africa than what it has been in for the last 80+ years. However this is not a wholly different situation to that my grandmother would have heard of. much of the continent is still very much under euroamerican influence, the us of slave labor or near slave labor conditions is still a significant factor in the economic relationship between Africa and its former colonizers, which is seen very strongly in the Congo and in coco production. Africa is still yet to industrialize in a manner that matches its needs and this is generally at the behest of its colonizers, and in the majority of the continent the colonial capitalist ventures still own land and resources they stole and murdered their way into, settler property relations have also been solidified in places like south Africa. i would believe that Rodney would say that say that Africa still has a long way to go if he was still around.

The themes of the book were quite complex, and it was refreshing in many ways to be presented with such a sober look into Africa. Read the book, understand what its saying and try to use a similar level of consciousness, nuance, and thought in your day to day analysis of the world around you, and we may have a chance at fixing this ship.

To depart from the contents of the book, i would like to address the white man in the room. Europe, its role in history and its modern role in history, like I've said at the top, not time or place for white people tears. I'm going to be brutally honest, and I'm going to combine the thoughts and finding of not just Nkrumah and Rodney, but also figures like Fanon, Malcom X, Kwame Ture,Rev Martin Luther king Jr and many others of the course of Africana histories and philosophies.

Europe, more particularly Western Europe, has spent the last few hundred years visiting horror on horror on the world, when it comes to the modern era, they simply have not stopped. the damage Europe as a bloc has done, much like the amount of people who were enslaved or killed for the slave trade, will never be full accounted for and that tab just keeps growing. There is no sign of it slowing or stopping. Empires don't like to stop existing, this is something those interested in history know very well. The problem is that Europe cannot be honest nor up front about this, be it the League of nations or the EU and America, or even in the face of the UN, Europe and its Settler states it spawned is just as addicted to domination and profit seeking at all cost as it was 100 years ago which was no different when the slave trade began. Europeans/ White people as a whole as still strongly in the belief that they have a moral high ground to speak to the rest of the world when the truth of the matter is for nearly 500 years, white peoples flying European flags have been histories biggest villains. even in the 21st century, Europe's role on the world stage has been that of a vampire. sucking the life from others to sustain itself. it is still violently racist and xenophobic, which is ironic for peoples who have literally invaded the vast majority of the world, nor is it any more moral or upright today than on the eve of colonialism in the Americas or Africa or any other portion of the world. the EU can barely come together today to denounce blatant acts of genocide and white people are finger waging about anti-LGBT laws in places they couldn't point to on a map (im not happy about anti-lgbt shit, im trans bi and poly this shit actually tears me up). Europeans and their settler offshoots boast about the safety of their cities while actively being the cause of the violence elsewhere. This is all to say Europes fucking evil ya'll, which we should all know at this point, but to further it, they aren't really going to stop as that's what its designed to be. these nations aren't going to suddenly produce radical leaders who are going grow morals or empathy and compassion and move us closer to a just world and fight climate change and help develop the global south or anything like that unless some extreme changes happen, not just among the ruling classes, but the everyday person because like i noted, its policies are racist and colonial and imperialistic, but that really only last not just because people aren't willing to guillotine people over it, but because a substantial enough portion of the populace that they care about are happy to be that way or are passive about the suffering of black or brown people or poor people. they will accept the idea the x group of brown people are homophobic or terrorist( never questioning what terrorist even means) and accept that they should constantly be bombed or killed or have their land and resources stolen, which if people cant see the parallels to the largest slaving nations going and invading under the guises of ending slavery and the nations the mainstreamed homophobia across the world and did acts of political terror across the globe going and claiming those are valid reasons to do what they do idk how to help you. your average white American or European is truly no more curious or wanting to actually learn and have dialog about African cultures than isrealis are about Arab culture, nor are they any less willing to throw white supremacist ideas about these peoples onto them. Those last things are not problems i really know how to solve because we are constantly shown even in internet spaces the white supremacist notions of the "other" will animate people into heinous actions, harassment, doxing campaigns, etc without POC even having to say a word against people. Unless White people yes in the monolithic have a substantial cultural and economic shift, you'll keep producing hitlers and leopolds, guilt will not push you, your nations, or your friends and families into a more positive role.

if it could, slavery would have done it, colonialism would have done it, the holocaust etc. you guys have to change, you must . Peace.

#black liberation #colonization #indigenous liberation #world of the oppressed #pan african #the colonized #politics #save for later #how europe underdeveloped africa #walter rodney #liberal hypocrisy #fascisim #scratch a liberal and a fascist bleeds

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