#Penelope: you hush you love him just as much as anyone else

[only-one-brain-cell]

Headcanon that Spencers son develops a hyperfixation on dinosaurs after reading about them at the library so anytime he gets a change all he talks about is dinosaurs and of course the BAU is hanging onto his every word. (of course so are his parents Spencer is the one that brought him to the library.)

#criminal minds #criminal minds headcannon #spencer reid headcanon #Maeve listening to him talk about T Rex’s over breakfast: wow that’s so cool Jay #Rossi: I remembered when he didn’t talk I should have known he had be just like his dad #Penelope: you hush you love him just as much as anyone else #Rossi: I- #Emily: you listened to him talk about space last month for two hours #Rossi: …… you try saying anything with those puppy dog eyes of his #give Spencer genuis babies who babble about their interests just like their daddy

[dreamwritesimagines]

i’m literally reading through this with my heart beating like crazy bc i know The Maze™️ is about to jump at me any time now. this is so funny like i’m a paragraph in sksks. anyways, back to reading–

THE WAY I YELLED AAAAAAAH HUGH AND KENNETH OH MY FUCKING GOD !!!!!!! GO AND GET SUMN !!! i feel like a love spell is just floating around this place goddamn why is everyone just in desperate need of a Lovin™️ sksksksk but pls Cherie immediately distracting Penelope like, she ain’t a snitch that’s for sure. now now, Who™️ is Anthony covering for?? it’s Elias & Cece isn’t it??? right when they disappeared to do the deed?? LMAO first thing in the job description as the best man: be on the lookout. but i feel like Elias won’t return the favour if ever Anthony and Cherie will one day sneak around before their marriage ksksksk

WHY. WAS. KENNETH. SHIRTLESS. THOUGH. Cherie out here asking the important questions LMAO. Hugh is also onto her with the kissing thing as well ksks i feel like he has an idea already but is just keeping it hush bc his dear friend is hurting. and pls, this moment is so sweet. Hugh feels so safe around Cherie like am so so sure he probably was Shitting Bricks™️ going up to her and expecting hard hitting questions but here she is asking if he was in love when Hugh and Kenneth just met. we love an open minded and non-judgmental queen <3 also, Cecily being the only one who knows...ugh my heart. he’s going to cry when he will walk her down the aisle. i am sure of it. “We’ll see.” HUGH X KENNETH ITS HAPPENING <3

“Elias was showing me around.” mm-hmm, indeed he was. he was NOT showing you around the house tho *wink* *wink* ksksks and now Lucie and Iona are missing. genuinely what are they putting in the water in this place???? is love always in the air at Stormview?

god she’s slowly starting to make up her mind about this adequate life partner thing. i mean, Lady Danbury being frank about Anthony’s feelings and my gooood it’s painful to watch Cherie deny it bc again, she’s made up her mind. and as we all know, she never listens to anyone. but OMG THANK YOU LADY DANBURY. her words about marrying another when you’re in love with someone else is just Chef’s Kiss™️ like, the whole marrying Pierre thing is genuinely a torture for her too and it’s quite sad that she’s either not seeing it or is simply accepting it.

oh my god here it comes and jfc i’m not there yet but i’m about to have a heart attack. .....omg that Cassandra of Troy parallel, about Cassandra not being believed by everyone....Cherie calling the statue mom...did Percival tell the sculpture to use Cassie as inspo?? my heart is aching. OMG HERE COMES ANTHONY AND NOW IT’S RAINING?!?!?!

“Marry me instead.” SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP. HOLD UP. I NEED TO BREATHEEEE IS THIS GOING BE----WAIT NO. NO NO NO!! ANTHONY NO. GOD NO. GOD FUCKING DAMMIT YOU MORON YOU BLASPHEMOUS IDIOT YOU AAAAAAAAH. SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP !!!! STOP TALKING OMG YOU’RE MAKING IT WORSE !!!

.....okay, wait, after much consideration and yelling at the wind, i get where he’s coming from. he’s still an Idiot Premium™️ don’t get me wrong, but that moment with Lady Danbury where she saw someone over Cherie’s shoulder, that was Anthony wasn’t it? meaning, he heard everything Cherie said that, “It was a childish dream to hope that I would have a love marriage. Now I know I must have other expectations and I’m glad to say that I have a suitor in mind that fits those expectations.”

so what he said to her in The Maze™️ is basically a response to what she was saying. this is him saying he meets those expectations she’s “looking” for.

Cherie: “An adequate life partner. Someone I can build a life with and raise children with.”

Anthony: “I can provide better financial security for you than he can, and as a Viscountess you will have a permanent and influential standing in the ton.” // “...our children would have uncontested places in the ton and they would want for nothing.”

he is proving to her what he thought she wanted, something logical. that he can provide for her, that he can give her a stable life, children, fortune, etc. i feel like when he heard Cherie said “An adequate life partner.” Anthony is now trying to tell her that he is an adequate life partner and that he is a better adequate life partner than Pierre. when Cherie stated all those things, Anthony basically resulted to: now she wants a logical marriage? i can do logical too. because he’s getting so fucking desperate here. 

a few chapters back he thought Cherie was still marrying for love so when she said she loved him, that sparked Anthony’s hope that okay, i can fix this, i will court her properly, i will prove myself to her, i still have the chance. because she loves me and she said she wants to marry for love. BUT THEN when he HEARD (i really want to empathize that and i will explain it further in the next paragraph) Cherie said she is marrying Pierre bc he’s an adequate life partner a.k.a. a logical marriage, Anthony is scrambling because he doesn’t know what to do anymore. first she wanted love, now she wanted a business matrimony? i can do business. BUT the way he went about it is just....wrong bc he’s just failing to see what Cherie actually wants. bc she is being in denial to quote Penelope. so she’s now saying she’s marrying Pierre not for love but bc she basically thinks he’s a logical match. she saying that’s what she wants even tho she’s lying to everyone and herself. BUT Anthony is taking her words at face value even though she’s actually hiding what she truly feels.

this is why i’m not blaming everything on Anthony, bc let’s be real here, he can’t read minds. so he is only going about what he’s hearing from her. like these are words coming from Cherie herself. he’s going to believe her and take her words into account BUT how was he supposed to know that what her mouth is speaking is actually different to what’s going through her head? WE are seeing Cherie’s thought process, Anthony is not. his last braincell is already struggling as is, are we really going to expect him to dissect every little thing from Cherie’s facial expression and body language and figure it all out and find the truth all while she’s actively trying her best to hide her true feelings? this is why Communication Is Key™️ folks bc you can only assume what someone’s words mean and assumption is never 100% and these two haven’t had a Real & Honest Conversation™️ not even ONCE. their moments together, they aren’t exactly communicating, they’re just saying words and all are flying over each other’s heads. i mean, Cherie isn’t letting Anthony finish his sentences, Anthony is having a hard time understanding her because she’s saying one thing and then something else the next day but also wanting something else entirely. Cherie hasn’t even seen Anthony's side either, like she has yet to hear why he didn’t want love in the first place and why he came to that logic. and she has yet to hear about what Anthony said to Elias as to why Anthony didn’t go public with them at the start. and he was about to tell her that he doesn’t see her as a “shameful secret” but again, she didn’t let him speak.

BIG SIGH™️ i’m about to pull my hair out at this point. i’m just.....Frustrated™️ LMAO. bc they are BOTH sending mix signals to each other. Anthony is hearing what Cherie is saying but he isn’t seeing the truth (not that he can bc again, he can’t read minds) Cherie is hearing all this claims from everyone that Anthony loves her but she’s refusing to see the truth i.e. Lady Danbury saying she’s being blind.

i know everyone is going come at Anthony for this, and rightfully so, but Cherie isn’t exactly faultless here either. we have to take into account that Anthony isn’t a mind reader, that he is only taking in what he’s given which is Cherie’s own words. and my god the Communication™️ is as bad as it’s going to get. bc neither of them are giving the other the chance to lay it all the fuck out. neither of them are being honest with each other too!! i mean, hell, they’re not being honest with themselves. if Anthony had just been honest and told her he wants to marry her bc he loves her, it would’ve definitely made a difference. but if Cherie had just been honest with herself that she actually does NOT want an adequate partner only then maybe Anthony would not have tried to convince her that he is an adequate partner.

i feel like he was about to say he loves her, like, he was about to say it when she asked why, but then he panicked bc let’s not forget this is a man who swore off love, who was so convinced he would never have love for years. OF COURSE he’s going to be terrified to just say it especially when this is going to be his first time saying it to the person he loves out loud. idk about you guys but confessing powerful feelings to someone is fucking scary, and when that person is angry at you?? mortifying. but also, i feel like he remembered Cherie’s words about not wanting a love marriage anymore hence why she’s marrying Pierre. so Anthony thought, if that’s what she wants i can give her that too and decided last minute to take the business route instead which.....obviously was the wrong choice. Anthony sees Pierre as a competition, so he’s trying to one up him in every way. Anthony knew he was already in the lead when it comes to Cherie marrying for love bc Cherie loves him, not Pierre. BUT THEN when he heard Cherie is marrying Pierre purely out of business, Anthony tried to one up Pierre in that regard. he just failed to realised that him and Pierre weren’t even in a competition in the first place bc Cherie isn’t marrying Pierre for either love or business, she wants to marry Pierre bc she thinks it will not break her heart as much compared to being married to Anthony. honestly, THIS IS ALL JUST A DOMINO EFFECT OF ONE MISCOMMUNICATION TO ANOTHER.

okay, side note: what was Cece doing out awake at night?? someone is sneaking around aren’t they?????? anyways, now i am desperately hoping for Cecily to come through with this like please help this Idiot Premium™️ make sense of things. and help Cherie see the truth too. bc we all see it, everyone in Stormview sees it, the hedge maze sees it, the tstatue sees it, the fucking raindrops sees Anthony’s feelings for her. Lady Danbury has spelled those words about but she’s still refusing to see it. i am hoping we will know what Cece and Anthony is going to talk about in the extra scene, and i feel like once he tells Cece that he loves Cherie then she will definitely change her stance on this. also if she finds out Cherie’s plans of marrying Pierre??? and then Cece tells Elias??? oof. drama.

god this got a bit long sksksk but then again, my thesis has never been short. Dee, amazing as always, you have me yelling at my phone like a mad woman bc goddamn. that maze scene was definitely NOT what i expected to happen but it for sure was an amazing scene like my heart. is aching. i loved it and i’m also so frustrated bc ugh COMMUNICATE™️ i really want them to just sit and talk and have Cece moderate everything or like let them drink all the truth serum in the world so we can finally know peace sksksks

– TM Anon™️

Omg omg TM Anon hi love! ❤❤❤ Aaaaaa I’m so excited for this! 😍

Hugh and Kenneth yessss! ❤ Well it’s a wedding, the place is very romantic….😏

Oh it’s definitely Elias and Cece😂 Elias made him stand guard by the hallway so that no one would go in, and pulled the best man card and also he knows Anthony is trying to make amends and he’s using that to his advantage a lot 😂

 but i feel like Elias won’t return the favour if ever Anthony and Cherie will one day sneak around before their marriage Lolll nopeee😂 I actually think Elias would legit sabotage their “alone time” before AND after their wedding 😂

I think for Cherie, the most important question of all times is “Are you in love” and she doesn’t even care if they’ve just met 😂

is love always in the air at Stormview? It’s such a romantic place! ❤

She is! Like, she’s sure she’s going to marry Pierre and refuses to listen to anyone 💔 And Lady Danbury knows just how bad of an idea it is, and yet…💔

Cassandra of Troy parallel yes! 😍 I love including parallels in stories😍😏

 SHUT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP. HOLD UP. I NEED TO BREATHEEEE IS THIS GOING BE----WAIT NO. NO NO NO!! ANTHONY NO. GOD NO. GOD FUCKING DAMMIT YOU MORON YOU BLASPHEMOUS IDIOT YOU AAAAAAAAH. SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP !!!! STOP TALKING OMG YOU’RE MAKING IT WORSE !!! I literally cannot stop laughing-

This right here, this was exactly the reaction I was hoping to evoke during Anthony’s speech😂

that moment with Lady Danbury where she saw someone over Cherie’s shoulder, that was Anthony wasn’t it? OH YEAH😏

he is proving to her what he thought she wanted, something logical. that he can provide for her, that he can give her a stable life, children, fortune, etc. i feel like when he heard Cherie said “An adequate life partner.” Anthony is now trying to tell her that he is an adequate life partner and that he is a better adequate life partner than Pierre. when Cherie stated all those things, Anthony basically resulted to: now she wants a logical marriage? i can do logical too. because he’s getting so fucking desperate here.  THIS- THIS-

This analysis omg I’m screaming, this is ABSOLUTELY AMAZING?! 😍😍😍 Darliiiiing! 😱😍

Anthony is scrambling because he doesn’t know what to do anymore. first she wanted love, now she wanted a business matrimony? i can do business.  Exactly! ❤ Oh I have so many ideas about this❤

In my mind, Anthony is actually very used to getting what he wants❤ So far, it went like that for him, he never really had to talk about his feelings or do anything that got him out of his comfort zone, things just work for him ❤

Until Cherie showed up 😂

So his mind is actual chaos rn😂 He wanted her to marry him, and he was going to tell her he loved her, but then everything came crashing down, (not to mention Cherie was really angry at him like you said) so his mind directly went to like, “As an alternative, I can prove why I’d make a better husband logically, like she says she wants” ❤

Deep down he knew she wanted love, but when it came to talking about it, Anthony thought there was an alternative where he could just avoid talking about his feelings, and that thought was also encouraged by “she wants an adequate love partner” and then…

It all went down 😂

how was he supposed to know that what her mouth is speaking is actually different to what’s going through her head? WE are seeing Cherie’s thought process, Anthony is not. Yessss and it’s actively working against him!

these two haven’t had a Real & Honest Conversation™️ not even ONCE. their moments together, they aren’t exactly communicating, they’re just saying words and all are flying over each other’s heads. i mean, Cherie isn’t letting Anthony finish his sentences, Anthony is having a hard time understanding her because she’s saying one thing and then something else the next day but also wanting something else entirely. Oh this is such a good point!

They really need to have a real and honest conversation, exactly! ❤ Like, before they were both in a bubble, they were both “enamored” so they didn’t even think about it, they were so lost in the feeling❤ And now, it’s even more complicated, they’re both very hurt and clueless about what to do, so it’s even more difficult than before❤

Anthony is hearing what Cherie is saying but he isn’t seeing the truth (not that he can bc again, he can’t read minds) Cherie is hearing all this claims from everyone that Anthony loves her but she’s refusing to see the truth OH MY GOD-

This parallel, I haven’t even thought about it before! I’m like freaking out, you’re a genius darling! ❤❤❤

OF COURSE he’s going to be terrified to just say it especially when this is going to be his first time saying it to the person he loves out loud. idk about you guys but confessing powerful feelings to someone is fucking scary, and when that person is angry at you?? mortifying. but also, i feel like he remembered Cherie’s words about not wanting a love marriage anymore hence why she’s marrying Pierre. so Anthony thought, if that’s what she wants i can give her that too and decided last minute to take the business route instead which.....obviously was the wrong choice. DEFINITELY!

Like, he was trying to find a way without him having to open up his heart, and since she claims to want a business marriage…

He didn’t even see how bad it would backfire until Cherie started her own monologue💔

okay, side note: what was Cece doing out awake at night?? someone is sneaking around aren’t they??????

Oh Cece was coming back from Elias’s room😏😂 She was trying to sneak into her own room before she saw Cherie and Anthony ❤

You have no idea how much I love this darling, YOU’RE A GENIUS AND YOU’RE AMAZING AND ILYSM! ❤❤❤ THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOUUU! 😍😱❤❤❤

[shemarmooresfedora]

Daisies Mean ‘I’m an Idiot’

Summary: Spencer unintentionally declines when Y/N asks him out because he couldn’t possibly be the man she was describing to Penelope in her office.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Content/Warnings: light to mild angst with fluffy ending, one swear word

Word Count: 1.2k

A/N: this is for @homoose ‘s 2k celebration. congrats!! sorry for the angst but the ending is super fluffy to make up for it!

Spencer was going to drop off a file to Garcia when he heard the hushed whispers of you and Penelope. He knew he shouldn’t eavesdrop so he was beginning to quietly close the door but something caught his attention.

“Penelope, I don’t think I can ask him out. He’s literally way out of my league.”

Spencer’s movements halted, he knew it was wrong but he had to hear the end of this conversation. Spencer didn’t think it was possible that someone could be out of your league, you were perfect.

“I know for a fact he will say yes, Y/N,” Penelope assured you.

“I’m pretty sure he doesn’t see me like that but I really wish he did. I love talking to him and he is so kind and cute and goddamn perfect,” you whined.

Spencer closed the door. He had heard enough. Whoever this guy was was the luckiest man on Earth.

-

Okay, there he is. He’s just sitting at his desk doing files like usual, no big deal. You can do this, Y/N.

You were trying to work up the courage to ask Spencer out. You had saved it for until after you had finished your files and Hotch had told you that you were free to go so that if this went south, you could leave quickly.

“Hey, Spencer,” you slowly approached his desk.

He looked up from his file and for some reason, his warm smile didn’t seem as bright today. Already a great start.

“Uh there’s um a showing of Little Women tonight and I know you said you have read the book multiple times but never seen the movie and I-I already have two tickets and-” you began to say.

“It’s not that I don’t appreciate the thought but I’m busy,” Spencer quickly cut you off, looking back down at his file.

“Oh um okay. S-Sorry to bother you,” you twisted your lips, trying to not let the tears overflow just yet.

You grabbed your coat and bag from your desk and hurriedly made your way to the glass doors.

Penelope was on her way to make copies when she passed you repeatedly hitting the elevator button as if it would make the elevator get to the sixth floor faster.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” she asked.

You turned around with tears running down your cheeks, “He said no, Pen. I was in the middle of asking him to a movie and dinner and he cut me off. He must have known where I was going with it and shut me down as quickly as possible. God, I’m so stupid,” you sniffled.

The elevator dinged and the doors slid open as you stepped inside.

“Will you go with me? I still wanna watch the movie so I have an excuse to cry in the dark while eating candy and popcorn with my best friend,” you asked.

“Of course, I’ll go with you, sweetie,” she agreed, “But I really don’t understand why Spencer said no.”

“Because he doesn’t like me like that...just as I thought,” you sighed as the elevator doors closed.

-

Spencer felt bad for turning down your movie invitation but he knew you would find someone else to go with. Maybe it would even give you the push to ask out that guy. As much as it would kill Spencer on the inside, he just wanted you to be happy. He couldn’t be with you tonight though, he had to process the devastating confirmation that his massive crush was completely one-sided and always would be.

He was trying so hard to focus on the files in front of him but his mind kept wandering off to you. He was the last one in the bullpen which was a rarity.

Spencer felt a swift smack on the back of his head.

“Ow!” Spencer turned around, rubbing the back of his head, to see Penelope standing there with a file in her hand.

“That is for making Y/N cry,” she huffed.

“What?” Spencer asked.

“You cut her off in the middle of her trying to ask you out. Even though I thought you liked her too, you could at least give her the decency to finish her sentence, Reid,” Penelope was storming out of the bullpen.

Spencer was already up and out of his chair, running to catch up with her. How was she so speedy for someone in high heels.

“She was asking me out?” Spencer followed Penelope into her lair.

“What did you think she was doing, genius?”

“I don’t know. We go to the movies together sometimes and those weren’t dates,” Spencer was trying to put the pieces together in his head.

“Well if you let her finish,” Penelope glared at Spencer, “she was going to ask you to dinner after but you had to be rude about it. She had it all planned out. Poor girl was so worked up about it.”

“I wasn’t trying to be rude,” Spencer frantically insisted, “I heard her talking about asking a guy out this morning and I got a little upset. I just didn’t want to spend the whole night listening to her talk about her plans with some other guy soon and trying to act like it doesn’t hurt.”

“She was talking about you,” Penelope rolled her eyes.

“She thinks I’m cute and loves talking to me?” Spencer asked incredulously.

“Yes, she does. And you just made her go home crying. So what are we going to do about that?”

-

You texted Penelope that you were outside the theater. You sat down on a bench, fiddling with your fingers as you waited.

Two converse appeared in your peripheral vision. You looked up to see Spencer, holding a bouquet of flowers, completely out of breath.

“I-I-Oh my god, that was a long run from the metro. Give me one sec,” he bent over his knees to catch his breath.

After his breathing had stabilized, he extended the flowers towards you, “The purple hyacinth is traditionally given to ask for forgiveness but the florist didn’t have those. Daisies usually symbolize innocence but in this case, let’s just say they mean ‘I’m an idiot and incredibly sorry’.”

You didn’t say anything so Spencer continued, “I heard you and Penelope this morning. I know it was wrong to listen in on a private conversation but I couldn’t help myself. You were talking about some guy that you thought you didn’t have a chance with and I thought that couldn’t possibly be me because well, look at you! You’re so beautiful and perfect. You’re way out of my league. Way out of anyone’s league for that matter, you could get anyone you wanted so I’m so sorry I couldn’t process that you were actually asking me out on a date. I couldn’t and still can’t comprehend why you would choose me.”

You patted the bench for him to sit down next to you.

“Why wouldn’t I like you, Spencer? You’re sweet, handsome, generous, and you make me smile,” you spoke softly.

“Y/N, is there any chance you would let me see the movie with you and take you to dinner afterwards?” he asked hopefully.

“Yes but the only thing is I’m in sweats because I was kind of expecting Penelope,” you laughed.

“You would still and always will be the most beautiful girl wherever we go,” he smiled.

#mooselovescreators #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #reid x reader #spencer x reader #spencer reid #cm fanfic #criminal minds

[imagining-in-the-margins]

Bruises (S.R.)

Summary: The team is concerned when Reader shows up with bruises on their neck. Request: possessive spencer absolutely ruins you and lightly chokes you. the next day when yall go to work everybody thinks something happened to you bc you got bruises Couple: Spencer Reid/GN!Reader Category: Fluff (Rated 16+) Content Warning: Vague allusions to suspected (non-existent) abuse, choking, bruises Word Count: 750

MASTERLIST

You are the last person to notice the bruises on your neck. It is not until you are washing your hands in the restroom that you look up and see small little circles scattered across your skin. Thankfully, your boyfriend (who no one else has seemed to notice is your boyfriend) has a penchant for scarves.

You snatch one from his desk on the way back to your own and erase it from your mind. After all, it’s unlikely for anyone else to have noticed in the fifteen minutes you’ve been at work, you remind yourself.

But you are wrong.

JJ is the first person to approach you, with shifty eyes and a soft, maternal voice. She asks you if things have been okay lately, and you tell her the truth. Everything is fine. Pretty good, really, all things considered. She puckers her lips but says nothing else.

Whatever she had seen in your answer was quickly shared with Emily. You knew this because she was the next person to approach you. She tells you all about how hard it is to work here. That it can make your personal problems seem so small and so suffocating at the same time. Emily tells you that she loves you, and that you can always talk to her if you need someone to talk to.

If JJ was the mother, Matt is the father. He compliments your scarf, awkwardly and with an obvious ulterior motive. You thank him, nonetheless. You can tell that he has many things he wants to say to you, but something about the smile on your face scares him off. Before he leaves, however, he kindly reminds you that he is even more well-trained in self-defense than the average agent.

The thought brings you to Luke, who said nothing to you, but did bring you your favorite treat from the bakery down the street. You found it odd but said nothing. He was a sweet guy, and you figured he was just trying to find an excuse to pick something up for Penelope.

Tara offers to wash the sweets down with something bitter after work. You tell her that, while you appreciate the offer, you have other plans. Everyone notices you saying no to a drink, and you notice for the first time that they are all watching you.

Everyone but Rossi. Throughout the day, he had kept to himself. There were no reminders of how loved you are or how much he wanted to spend time with you. In fact, for most of the day, he’d avoided you entirely.

For the briefest second, you wonder if you’ve somehow missed your own birthday, or some other strange reason to celebrate. You pinch yourself twice to convince yourself that this is all an odd fever dream.

When you release the blanched skin, a thought occurs to you… and suddenly the heat in your face is not only from embarrassment. You excuse yourself to the bathroom and laugh until all of the air is drained from your lungs, which is not much considering the loud gasp that preceded it.

You tell no one the truth behind your bruises. You are never given the chance.

When you return from the bathroom, you wait before you come around the corner. You hear them all whispering - everyone but Rossi and your boyfriend. In hushed voices, they discuss how they are worried about you, and how something must have happened. They theorize about the possibility and likelihood of a secret, abusive boyfriend.

It’s at that exact moment that you step out into the light, just late enough that Spencer loses his cool.

“I would never do that!” he calls, and the whole room goes silent.

The team is too busy with the revelation to realize that you’re back, and you watch from a distance as the gears turn in their head.

“But…” JJ starts. They all look to each other, expecting them to finish their sentences as they always did.

“The bruises,” Emily explained before Tara tagged on, “Bruises consistent with manual strangulation.”

You don’t hear Rossi step up behind you, but you feel his hand on your shoulder.

“I warned them,” he mumbles, “I warned them that they didn’t want to know.”

And you laugh, because you have no idea what the hell else you’re supposed to do.

(Tell me what you thought of this fic here!)

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid imagine #criminal minds smut #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds self insert #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #spencer reid blurb #spencer reid self insert #spencer reid request #reid request

[parkerslatte]

Fun & Games [Chapter One]

Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Series Summary: After getting up close and personal on a case, neither Y/N nor Spencer can get enough of one another.

Part Summary: While undercover as a young loving couple, both Y/N and Spencer realise that they may just have to step up their game.

Word Count: 3.1k

Warnings: This series is an 18+ series. Minors DNI.

next chapter

Fun & Games Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Taglist

***

CHAPTER ONE: ONE KISS

Soft laughs came from a booth in the corner of the busy restaurant that went unnoticed by most people. No one paid any attention to the couple that looked so very clearly in love with each other. The way that their eyes lit up every time they made eye contact. Whenever the woman would gently rub her hands over the man’s chest he felt himself pulled even closer to her touch. The man’s hand on her thigh, his thumb gently rubbing circled on it, made her skin burn. 

Of course the couple hadn’t noticed the fact that their bodies were somehow attracted towards one another, like they were acting on their own accord. However, the way the couple had pressed their bodies together was nothing except utter convenience. The whispers exchanged between the two were nothing like the usual sweet nothings exchanged between two lovers. In fact they were quite the opposite. 

“The table by the large window,” Spencer’s lips brushed past Y/N’s ear, “He’s been staring at us for a while now. Do you think he could be the unsub?”

***

How Spencer and Y/N found themselves to be in this position was strange to say the least. The morning they walked into the bullpen, no one was at their desks. That morning Spencer had to call Y/N to ask for a ride to work as he had woken up late and missed the train. 

“Where is everyone?” Y/N asked, “I thought that we were supposed to do paperwork today?”

Spencer looked around the bullpen until his eyes landed on the round table room where everyone was standing around. Y/N followed his eye line and groaned.

“We better not have a case.” Y/N said as the two made their way to the round table room. 

When the two walked in, all attention was diverted towards them, not what Hotch was saying. There were two boxes sitting in the middle of the table which made Y/N even more confused. 

“Do we have a case?” Spencer spoke up.

“You can say that.” Emily said, repressing a smirk.

“Reid, L/N, you two are going undercover at a restaurant tonight.” Hotch stated.

“Okay…” Y/N said slowly, “Are you going to explain why or are we just going to be surprised?”

“Over the last couple of weeks, there have been several couples murdered and we are led to believe that the unsub selects them from this restaurant, their bodies have all been found around the area.” Hotch explained.

“Why haven’t we heard about this until now?” Y/N questioned as she was handed a file to look over by Penelope.

“We weren’t invited on the case until last night,” Hotch said, “And we have to move fast, the time between his kills is getting shorter by the minute.”

“Okay, but why is it me and Spence going undercover, why not any of you?” Y/N asked.

“The unsub has only targeted couples around your ages, you two are our best bet to go in.” Hotch explained.

“What are those boxes on the table?” Spencer questioned.

“Oh these!” Penelope piped up suddenly getting excited, “These are the clothes you will both be wearing tonight, it’s a very fancy restaurant so this calls for very fancy clothes. I made sure to get them in your sizes and I’m sure they will flatter you both immensely.”

As Y/N and Spencer headed to where the bathrooms were to try on their outfits, Y/N nudged him slightly.

“So Spence, are you ready to be my boyfriend?” Y/N teased.

“Only if you’re ready to be my girlfriend.” Spencer replied.

“Please, of course I’m ready,” Y/N said, “It’s you I’m worried about.”

“Yeah?” Spencer questioned.

“Yeah,” Y/N confirmed, “I don’t know how you’ll be able to handle all of this.”

Spencer looked her up and down, before stepping slightly closer to her, “I think I can manage.”

Y/N smirked, “We’ll see Spencer, we’ll see.”

***

Discreetly, Y/N looked over her shoulder, making out like she was looking for the waiter. The man Spencer was talking about was staring directly at them as he gripped his drink so tightly that his knuckles turned white. The longer Y/N looked at him, the more he stared back. 

“It’s possible it could be him.” Y/N muttered under her breath while turning back to face Spencer. 

Y/N shifted her body in the booth so she could have an eye line of the man. To not make it look obvious, she wrapped her arms around Spencer’s neck to pull him closer to her. 

As Y/N watched the man shift around in his seat that’s when Y/N saw the obvious bulge in his pants. She tried her best to stifle her giggle.

“Spence,” Y/N whispered, her lips brushing against his ear, “I don’t think he’s our unsub.”

“Why not?” Spencer questioned,trying to turn back to face the man however Y/N placed her hand on his cheek to keep him staring at her. 

“Don’t make it too obvious you’re looking,” She muttered, “We don’t want to embarrass him further.”

“Embarrass him? How?” Spencer asked.

“He’s trying to hide a rather obvious bulge in his trousers,” Y/N said, “I mean I see why, we look absolutely incredible in these clothes. I think we should put on a little show for him.”

“What- what do you mean?” Spencer questioned.

“Just to rile him up a bit, hopefully get him to leave, he’s awfully distracting,” Y/N said, “Do you trust me?”

“Of course,” Spencer said, “How are we going to rile him up?”

“Like this.” Y/N said and positioned her and Spencer’s head in a position that, from the man’s angle, looked like they were kissing. 

Y/N’s lips were nearly brushing the corner of Spencer’s. At that moment, neither of them thought anything of the position they were in, they were solely focused on getting rid of that guy. Spencer moved his hand up Y/N’s thigh slightly, his thumb gently dug into the inside of her thigh but she paid no attention to it. Her hands came up to gently run through Spencer’s hair. Both of them were trying their best to suppress their laughter. 

After another minute, Y/N looked to where the man would be sitting and he was up and off of his feet heading towards the bathroom. Letting out the laugh she had wanted to for the last few minutes she parted from Spencer slightly, however she still remained close to maintain their cover. 

“And he’s gone to probably sort some things out in the bathroom.” Y/N chuckled which caused Spencer to laugh. 

“I can’t believe a guy got turned on just by looking at us.” Y/N said.

“Well it’s like you said,” Spencer said leaning close to her, “We look incredible in these clothes.”

Y/N smiled and reached her arms up to straighten Spencer’s bow tie, “Well I don’t know about me but you look incredibly handsome Dr, Reid.”

“You look amazingly beautiful Y/N, don’t even try to argue with me.” Spencer said.

Ever since Y/N had joined the BAU three years ago, her relationship to Spencer was always the strongest one she had. When she began to flirt with him, he would always get flustered and red in the face but as time went on and he realised that she was only messing with him, he began to return her flirtations - much to everyone’s surprise. The two could sometimes give Penelope and Derek a run for their money. 

“But I am being serious Spence, you do look handsome.” Y/N said genuinely, the flirtatious tone in her voice gone.

“So was I Y/N, you look so incredibly beautiful.” Spencer said. 

Y/N smiled before pressing a quick kiss to Spencer’s cheek. It wasn’t anything she hadn’t done before. 

“Can I get you anything else?” The waiter asked, suddenly appearing beside their table. 

Y/N looked around their table, the starters they had ordered to keep up appearances were long gone and their glasses of water were nearly empty. 

“Could we just get two glasses of water please?” Y/N questioned. The waiter nodded before wandering off. 

Y/N turned back to Spencer so they could talk in hushed whispers, “So obviously that guy completely rules out anyone we had as a suspect. Does anyone else look a little suspicious?”

The two discreetly scanned the restaurant once again. There were considerably less people than when the two first stepped foot in the building. Of course there was the possibility that the unsub may not even be in the restaurant with the two profilers, there was even the possibility that he had already left. But neither Y/N nor Spencer were going to back down. 

“Over by the bar area,” Spencer muttered, “Our waiter.”

Y/N looked towards where Spencer had said and low and beyond, theur waiter was intensely staring at them. What was different about the waiter's stare and the other man’s stare was that the waiter's stare was filled with pure hatred. 

“I’ll go to the bathroom to call Hotch,” Y/N muttered standing up. Before she could walk away she bent down towards Spencer to press a kiss against his cheek, “If the waiter does bring the water over, make sure not to drink it. It could be poison for all we know.”

Y/N headed towards the bathroom and as soon as she stepped inside, she immediately called Hotch. It rang once before he picked up.

“L/N?” Hotch spoke.

“Hotch, we think we have the guy but we have no way to be sure. We think it was our waiter,” Y/N explained, “If it is him, he’s had close contact with us all night so he thinks we’re most definitely a couple.”

“Okay, you and Reid exit the restaurant and try to lure the unsub to you, we’ll be near you for back up,” Hotch explained, “Reid has his gun right?”

“Yep,” Y/N confirmed, “We’ll head out now.”

The phone call ended and Y/N headed out of the bathroom and back to the table Spencer was waiting patiently at. The water they had ordered remained on the table untouched. Y/N extended her hand out to Spencer.

“Babe, let’s go home now, I really need to get out of their dress and maybe you can help me with it.” Y/N said, making sure the unsub could hear her. She cast an apologetic glance to a table that overheard her comment. 

Spencer took her hand as they stood up from the table. His arm wrapped around her waist as they walked through the restaurant and out the front doors. The streets were practically barren, barely anyone was around except for the occasional car driving past. If Y/N didn’t know the rest of her team was around, she would feel slightly scared.

As the two stepped out from the warmth of the restaurant and into the cold night air, Y/N couldn’t help but shiver as she folded her body into herself in an effort to keep warm. 

“Do you want my jacket?” Spencer asked. 

Y/N raised an eyebrow, “So you would rather see me with more clothes on?” She teased. 

Spencer rolled his eyes, a smile on his face, “I just won’t offer from now on.”

“No, no, I appreciate the gesture really,” Y/N said, before tilting her head up to whisper quietly into Spencer’s ear, “But your jacket is the only thing hiding your gun from the unsub.”

“Good point,” Spencer says before turning his head to see someone following them. They were wearing a coat but the trousers and shoes were the exact same as what the waiter was wearing, “The unsub is following us.”

Y/N didn’t risk looking back as she and Spencer walked down the street, “We need to lure him down to the next alley.”

“He’ll lose interest by then,” Spencer said, noticing where the next alleyway was.

“Do you trust me?” Y/N questions.

“Of course.” Spencer said.

Almost immediately after the words left Spencer’s mouth, Y/N’s lips were on his. Shocked was an understatement as to what Spencer felt in that moment. However, for the sake of the case, he kissed her back without a second thought. Y/N began to lightly push him until his back came in contact with the wall behind him. Spencer’s hand wandered down to Y/N’s hips as he gave them an unconscious squeeze causing her to moan quietly into Spencer’s mouth. 

It was as if both of them forgot where they were entirely as Spencer suddenly found the confidence to flip their positions so Y/N’s back was pressed against the wall. Their lips disconnected for a second as Y/N let out a small gasp. It wasn’t long before their lips were connected once again. Spencer’s hands roamed up her body, causing shivers to run up Y/N’s spine. His hands settled on either side of Y/N’s head, fingers tangling in her hair as he held her there. 

Completely not realising what he was doing, Spencer bent his knee slightly, causing Y/N to part her legs slightly. By now their kiss had gotten more desperate and they weren’t just kissing for the sake of the case anymore. They were kissing because they were desperate for each other. 

Spencer’s lips left hers as he began to trail kisses along her jaw making Y/N let out small whimpers of need. 

“Spencer…” She panted. 

Before either of them could continue what they had just started, they were quickly brought back to reality by the sound of a gun clicking. Spencer’s mouth immediately left Y/N’s jaw as he lifted his head up, not daring to look back. Instead he settled to shift his gaze down to Y/N who was still pressed tightly between his body and the wall, his hands still placed on the side of her head. 

“Don’t move,” The unsub hissed, “You two make me sick.”

Without the unsub noticing, Y/N slowly moved her hand under Spencer’s jacket, feeling around until her hand came in contact with his gun. 

“Why are you doing this?” Spencer questioned, keeping his voice calm, knowing what Y/N was doing. 

“People like you make me sick, the kissing, the hugging, the constant touching.” The unsub said.

“So you have a problem with public displays of affection?” Spencer questioned. 

“No, it’s couples like you that show it off all the time and act with no care in the world. You act like the world revolves around you. They don’t care about anything around them.” The unsub said, pressing the gun fully against the back of Spencer’s head causing Y/N to look up at him with a slight fear in her eyes. All she hoped for was for her team to stop him in time. 

“The other couples I killed, they were just like you two. Sitting in a booth acting all loving with each other while I waited on them and I got not a single thank you in return!” The unsub yelled. 

Y/N’s hand was fully on the gun, she hoped she wouldn’t have to use it but she knew that it was getting to that point. 

“Thank you,” Spencer said, “We appreciate you serving us our food and drinks.”

“Too late.” The unsub said and as he was about to pull the trigger, Y/N shot Spencer’s gun. It wasn’t a place where the unsub would be killed but was enough to seriously injure him.

Once the unsub fell to the ground, clutching his bullet wound in agony, Spencer and Y/N immediately wrapped each other in a hug, momentarily forgetting what just happened between them only moments ago. 

“We’re okay…” Spencer mumbled into her shoulder.

The two pulled away just as the team approached them. They were checked over before they were left alone, the events that just occurred still fresh in the mind. Y/N’s body still felt like it was burning from where Spencer had touched her. Her lips were swollen and she could still feel the ghost of Spencer’s lips trailing across her jaw. 

Y/N, still realising she was holding Spencer’s gun, offered it back to him to hich he took it. The two maintained eye contact for what felt like eternity. Spencer couldn't help but let his eyes constantly glance down to Y/N’s lips. Neither of them knew what to say to each other, knowing that whatever they said, they would make the situation more awkward than it needed to be. 

Luckily for both of them, Hotch approached the pair of them, causing both of their attention to divert to him. 

“Well done you two.” Hotch said. 

“Thank you Hotch.” Y/N said. 

Hotch gave her and Spencer a small nod before wandering off again leaving Y/N and Spencer alone again. Wanting to avoid Spencer for the time being, she spotted Emily and headed towards her, leaving Spencer to head towards Derek. 

“So, you and Spencer got a little close there,” Emily teased, causing Y/N’s face to heat up, “Did you two kiss or anything or did he just back you up to a wall and, like, hold you there?”

“I, well, he, um, we did- wait didn’t-” 

“You two did kiss!” Emily exclaimed, “Tell me, was our genius good or not?”

“Emily!” Y/N said, swatting her arm lightly, “We only kissed because the unsub was losing interest.”

“You didn’t answer my question.” Emily said.

“I don’t need to,” Y/N said, “We only did it for the sake of the case, I wasn’t thinking about whether he was a good kisser or not.”

Of course Y/N lied to Emily’s face. Of course she was thinking about whether he was a good kisser or not. He was an exceptional kisser. The way everything around them completely melted away as soon as their lips connected was nothing like Y/N had ever felt before. His hands and the way they roamed around her body was enough for Y/N’s face to heat up again. Of course Y/N would make flirty remarks toward Spencer all the time and nothing would ever come of it. But now after kissing him, she felt an attraction toward him - something she had never experienced before. 

“I think I’m just gonna head home now,” Y/N said, “I’ll see you tomorrow Em.”

As Y/N began walking away, she failed to notice the lingering glance Spencer was sending her way. Unbeknownst to Y/N, Spencer was feeling the exact way she was.

----------

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[talatomaz]

lockdown | jj x fem!teen!reader

a/n: i can’t believe that a year ago today, the last ever episode of criminal minds aired. i miss jj so much 🤧

this is sort of in line with my own experiences (to a certain extent). and there’s not as much jj x d!r as i’d intended but I hope you still like it.

(feedback/positive comments are appreciated)

requested by @ouat2017 : “could you do a jj x daughter where the daughter’s school is on lockdown and jj is worried or something like that?”

warnings: gun violence. blood

word count: 2.6k

masterlist | request list | request rules

r is jj’s 18 year old adopted daughter and suddenly finds herself on lockdown after someone brings a gun into her school

i do not give you permission to repost or translate my fics on any platform - likes/reblogs are okay and are much appreciated

“Look, you’re the one that needs to be tutored so can you please focus?”

You huffed, crossing your arms over your chest in annoyance.

You were currently in the tutoring centre trying to help a self-absorbed jock pass English so he could remain on the school’s football team.

Looking around you, you saw a handful of students giving both you and Cameron - the man-child you were tutoring - disparaging looks.

“You’re not supposed to be yelling at me. You’re meant to be telling me the answers.”

The aforementioned narcissist leaned against his chair, smirking at you in a way that made you fight to hide a shudder.

You could have easily wiped the grin off his face by mentioning who your mother was and who she worked for but instead, you decided to just continue ignoring his advances and carry on teaching him.

“That’s not how this works, Cameron. Now either you listen to me or you fail and get kicked off the team. And quite frankly, I’d rather the latter happen.”

You watched as his brows furrowed in confusion. Sighing, you answered, “latter means the second thing of two things mentioned in a sentence. Now, for the love of God, just finish writing your paragraph on Heller's satire of capitalism in Catch-22.”

You let out a breath of relief when he finally relented and started to scribble on his sheet of paper. You glanced over at one of your friends, who was also tutoring for extra credit, and smiled when she rolled her eyes at Cameron’s actions.

Leaning against the large desk that stood at the front of the room, you relished in the long-awaited silence aside from hushed whispers that came from other students asking for help.

Taking out your phone, you glanced at the screen to see that it was only midday and soon the lunch bell would be ringing.

You smiled softly at your lock screen.

It was a photo of you and JJ, your adoptive mother.

It was taken a few weeks prior at your 18th birthday party. You’d been living with JJ for almost 5 years now; her having fostered you before later adopting you when you were 14.

You still didn’t know what she saw in you on that day you’d first met her - you’d lost your family in a home invasion, barely surviving yourself - but whatever it was, you were grateful because you’d gotten a second chance at life.

Several minutes passed and you’d only broken from your train of thought when you heard someone clearing their throat beside you.

Looking over your shoulder, you saw your friend, the one who’d rolled her eyes earlier at Cameron, standing beside you.

“I see you finally got him to do his work.” She whispered, loud enough for your ears only.

“Barely. He still has an essay to write and hasn’t even finished a paragraph yet.”

“I would have smacked his sorry ass by now.”

You laughed before clamping your hand over your mouth, her comment having caught you off guard.

“Ally!” You whisper-shouted, playfully hitting her arm.

She looked at you with a raised eyebrow causing you to smirk, “Trust me, I’ve thought about it but-”

Before you could finish your sentence, a large bang rang out, shattering the silence the room had once held.

With wide eyes, your head whipped to the door where the gunshot had presumably come from and you listened as the hallways were filled with panicked screams.

Running to the door, ignoring the gasps and shouts from the other students behind you, you turned the lock on the door, pulled down the blinds, switched off the lights and jammed a chair under the handle.

Looking up, you saw everyone had the same look of panic in their eyes; a few were crying, including Ally, and others were pale with shock, Cameron was one of them.

“Guys, we’re gonna be okay but we have to be quiet.” You whispered harshly, constantly looking over your shoulder at the door, listening for any indication of the shooter coming your way.

Everyone stared at you, as if you were the leader of a camp and they were small children awaiting for further instruction.

You supposed it wasn’t far off.

By taking charge, you were the one who’d been unwillingly given the role of protector.

“First things first,” you walked over to the group of 10 students, “I need you all to make sure your phones are on silent. We can’t risk being caught.”

You watched as everyone followed your instructions.

“I know you all want to call your parents but that’s going to attract attention to us so for right now, we need to be quiet.”

Your heart was beating out of your chest and as you spoke, one thought repeated in your head. JJ.

Taking out your phone, you scrolled to find your mother’s name in your contacts. You watched as your thumb hovered over her name.

Just breathe, y/n. Breathe.

Tapping your mother’s name, you brought the phone to your ear.

“I thought you said we couldn’t call anyone.”

Your eyes locked onto Cameron’s, his face pale and his eyes filled with terror and a hint of anger.

“My Mum works for the FBI.” You whispered as the phone rang out.

Any other time and you probably would have laughed at the way his face grew paler, if that was even possible. But, in a situation this tense, it was going to be difficult to find any levity.

Your Mum picked up on the second ring and you let out a shaky breath when you heard her voice.

“Hi baby. A bit early for your lunch, isn’t it?”

You closed your eyes at her soft tone, as if you were trying to engrave the way she spoke into your mind lest you would never hear it again.

From your lack of response, the blonde sensed there was something up, “Y/N? What’s wrong?”

A single tear dropped down your cheek as you struggled to maintain a steady tone. Catching a glimpse of Ally staring at you, you steeled yourself and spoke.

“Mum, you need to come quick. Someone’s brought a gun into school.”

“Oh my-AARON.”

You winced when you heard her shout for her boss, listening as you could hear her run up stairs. You held your breath as she filled Hotch in on what was happening before telling Garcia to hack into your school’s security system.

“Are you okay? Stupid question. But are you hurt?”

“Mum,” you interrupted her rambling, “I’m fine. I’m in the tutoring centre with 10 other people. I don’t know how many people are injured. It just all happened so fast.”

“It’s okay, baby. You’re gonna be okay.”

Though you could hear the clear panic in her voice, her words did bring some form of reassurance to you.

“Penelope’s hacking into the system so hopefully she can have eyes soon.”

As she spoke, you could hear the clacking of keys in the background of the call; presumably Garcia doing exactly what JJ said.

“Mum?” You questioned when you heard Garcia swear.

Instead of JJ answering, the usually peppy tech analyst replied, her voice shaky and wet, as if she was crying.

“Y/N, thank God you’re okay.”

“What’s wrong, Garcia?”

“Someone’s disabled the cameras remotely. I can only get them back online if someone reprograms them from the inside.”

Grasping what she was explaining, you nodded, “I’ll fix them.”

“What? No!”

Your mother had taken the phone off of Garcia.

“You are not leaving that room, y/n. We’ll find another way in.”

“Mum, someone needs to fix the system from inside the school. I need to do it.”

Ignoring your mother’s worried shouts, you continued to speak, “Mum, I have to. I love you.”

You disconnected the phone and switched it off, preventing her from being able to call you back.

“Y/N, you are not leaving this room.”

You’d only just realised that everyone had been watching you intently during that entire interaction.

“Yes, I am.”

Moving away from the huddle, you rose to your feet and replied to your friend.

Cameron rose to his feet and towered over you as he challenged you, “No, you are not. You’re going to put us in danger.”

“Do you know how to hack into our school’s security system and then reconnect the transformer and enter the Mastercode?”

His face contorted to a look of confusion making you reply,

“Exactly.”

Turning to leave, you felt a large hand enclose around your arm.

“I said, you’re not leaving.”

Your eyes flickered from Cameron’s hand up to his face that dared you to take another step.

“Remove your hand from my arm before I remove your hand from your body. You may letter in football but I’ve been trained by some of the best FBI agents there are and unless you want to end up in a sleeper hold, I suggest you shut up and do what I say for once.”

His harsh grip almost immediately lessened as his hand returned to his side.

“Good. Now, have any of you been shot? No? I didn’t think so. Well, I have and whoever did get shot is probably bleeding out in the hallway. I can’t not do anything.”

No one dared to respond and instead, shook their head ‘no’ at your asking if anyone else would try to stop you.

Content that you weren’t going to deal with any more unnecessary distractions, you made your way to the door and gently removed the chair that was beneath the handle.

“Ally, you’re in charge. Lock the door when I leave. By my count, the FBI will be here soon. And Cameron, you do anything stupid and I’ll shoot you myself.”

Unlocking the door, you stepped out into the empty hallway and hastily made your way to where the main security hub was located.

Just a couple of hours ago, all you had wished for was silence but now that your wish had been granted, all you wanted was to hear the playful shouts and conversations between your friends and fellow students.

The silence that currently fell on your school was unnerving and unbearable. And with each step you took, you flinched at the sound your shoes made against the marble floor. Each noise practically acting as a beacon for the shooter to come find you.

You let out a sigh of relief when you found the Hub and you quickly worked to reconnect the security system. Typing on the laptop that rested atop one of the servers, you couldn’t help the smile that formed when all the cameras re-engaged.

Tapping on one of the keys, you navigated through the various cameras, looking for any indication of the shooter or of any injured people. You stopped when you caught a glimpse of someone.

Squinting at the screen, you saw, what appeared to be a freshman - since you didn’t recognise him as being a part of your year - laying on the ground, a hand clutching his stomach as blood coated his clothing.

Immediately knowing where he was, you cautiously made your way to the east hallway before running when you noticed him laying on the ground, his blood coating the once-white marble floor.

Falling to your knees, you pressed your hands against his wound, trying to stop the steady flow. He groaned out in pain, tears staining his face.

“H-Help me.” He choked out.

“What’s your name?”

“Jackson. But everyone c-calls me J-Jack.”

“Jack, you’re going to be okay. I just need you stay with me, okay? I’m-”

“Y/N.”

You failed to hide the surprise from your face making the younger teen smile despite his predicament.

“You’re t-tutoring Cameron. Everyone knows who you are. Y-You’re the one who doesn’t take any of his shit. I think h-he likes you.”

“Well, tough shit for him. I may be bi but he’s definitely not my type.”

Jack’s laugh quickly turned into another groan of pain.

Unzipping your jacket with one hand, you used the other to keep pressure on his wound. After removing the jacket, you harshly pressed it against his torso and watched as it barely absorbed the blood.

“I’m gonna die, aren’t I?”

“No, you’re not. I won’t let you.” You said, tears filling in your eyes as memories rushed back of when you tried to save your brother after he’d been shot.

“You’re going to be okay. I just need you to-”

You stilled when you heard footsteps come up behind you.

“Well, what do we have here?”

You didn’t recognise the voice and couldn’t bring yourself to turn around to face the person who’d caused all this pain.

You opened your mouth before closing it again, unsure of what to say.

Closing your eyes, you readied yourself for your inevitable death when a shot rang out and a body slumped to the ground beside you.

Jumping at the action, you turned around and almost collapsed in relief at what you saw. Your Mum and her team stood behind you with several SWAT members flanking them.

The tears that had once filled your eyes now spilled shamelessly down your cheeks.

Without saying a word, JJ holstered her gun and ran to your side, hugging you as best she could since your hands were still pressed against Jack’s wound.

Paramedics soon followed and after that it was all a blur. It was as if you were floating outside of your body. Logically, you knew it was the effects of an adrenaline crash but you felt so disconnected from your body.

You barely took note as your mother gently lifted you to your feet, allowing you to be briefly looked over by the paramedics. Nor as your mother escorted you to one of the school bathrooms where she rinsed the blood off your hands.

You didn’t even say a word until you’d arrived back at the BAU where a worried Penelope wrapped you in a tight hug which you returned.

“I’m gonna take her up to my old office, Hotch.”

The Unit Chief simply nodded as he and the rest of the team watched as JJ led you to the abandoned office that was still filled with random case files.

Closing the door, she sat you down on her sofa and stared at you, not touching you in fear that even a simple caress would cause you to shatter.

You exhaled a long breath before finally speaking, “I’m sorry.”

Her brows narrowed, “Sorry? Sweetheart, why?”

You looked at your hands that had been coated in blood less than an hour before and then up at your mother; her blue eyes filled with nothing but concern, love and confusion.

“You told me not to leave and I did. I’m sorry.”

And with that, you started to cry heart-wrenching sobs that made your shoulders shake.

JJ gathered you in her arms, gently rocking you as her long blonde hair draped over you.

“It’s okay, y/n. I got you, baby. You’re safe now.”

Her arms wrapped tightly around you as she laid soft kisses on your head, her hand stroking your back.

That only served to make you burrow into her even more, seeking comfort in her motherly embrace.

You muttered your apologies as she continued to reassure you that you were okay.

JJ was afraid that if she stopped, you wouldn’t be here, safe in her arms.

Still rocking you in her arms, she whispered in your ear,

“I got you, baby. You’re safe now.”

#criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #jennifer jareau #jennifer jareau x reader #jj x reader #jennifer jareau imagine #elle greenaway #elle greenaway x reader #emily prentiss #emily prentiss x reader #derek morgan #derek morgan x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #david rossi #david rossi x reader #jemily #aj cook #cm #cm x reader #criminal minds imagine #c: jennifer jareau #c: jj x d!r #s: mine #c: lockdown

[fortheloveofwonderland]

Semi-Charmed Life - Chapter 12 Final [Spencer x Reader]

Find my masterlist here. Requests are Open.

Requested: Yes l No

A/N: this chapter is named after Amazing by Aerosmith. This is the final chapter! Hope you've enjoyed the ride. Find the series masterlist here. If you would like to be added to my taglist please use this form.

CW: just a lot of long overdue fluff!

WC: 1.6K

—————————————————————

Chapter 12 - Amazing

It’s amazing,

With the blink of an eye, you finally see the light.

It’s amazing,

When the moment arrives that you know you’ll be alright.

It’s amazing,

I’m saying a prayer for the desperate hearts tonight.

April 2019

You sat on the bathroom floor staring at the item in your hand, wondering if you stare long enough, maybe it would change.

Maybe if you focused hard enough you could change this outcome. But you knew you couldn’t.

The seven other positive pregnancy tests had solidified it.

How had you let this happen? How could you have been so stupid?

It was one thing falling back into bed with Spencer so easily, it was another to forget you’d come off your contraceptive.

Finding out you were pregnant with Spencer’s baby should have been the happiest day of your life and once upon a time it would have been.

But not now. Now it was just a mess.

You thought about calling him but you weren’t ready to tell him, not just yet.

You thought about calling Luke or Penelope or maybe even Emily. But honestly, you weren’t ready to tell anyone yet.

Maybe if you just pretended it wasn’t real it would go away.

Maybe if you wished hard enough…

No, you wouldn’t do that. Because despite everything, all you’d ever wanted was to carry Spencer’s child.

And although the circumstances were far from ideal, you couldn’t help but be ecstatic about the prospect of having his child.

You didn’t know what was going to happen between you and Spencer but you knew regardless of the state of your relationship, he would be an amazing father.

And who knows, maybe the three of you would be able to be a family one day.

Stranger things have happened.

***

December 2019

“One more push! One more push!”

“You’re doing so well my love, you’re almost there.”

“Come on Y/N, one last push.”

“You can do it baby, you can do it.”

High pitched crying.

Relieved gasps.

“Doctor Reid, would you like to cut the cord?”

***

There was a light knock at the door before it opened cautiously.

“Are you up for visitors?” Garcia whispered

“We’re all dying to meet him.” Tara added.

“Come in, come in.” You smiled sleepily.

You laid in the hospital bed with your new baby boy on your chest. Spencer stood next to you with his arm around your shoulders, beaming with pride.

One by one the BAU team hurried in the room, crowding around the bed.

“Everyone we want you to meet Gideon Luke Reid.” Spencer spoke in hushed tones.

“Now that’s a good name.” Luke grinned, blushing a little.

“You would think that.” Matt laughed, nudging him in the arm.

“Can I hold him?” JJ was at your side, already reaching for the baby.

“Of course.” You smiled, cautiously handing the tiny bundle to her. “These are all your aunt’s and uncle's little one.”

“And grandpa Dave.” Rossi spoke.

“And grandpa Dave.” You laughed, stifling a yawn.

“Look at that full head of hair.” Emly cooed over the baby.

“Definitely gets that from his dad.” Tara laughed.

“Fingers crossed he gets everything else from his amazing mom.” Spencer smiled at you, placing a gentle kiss to your forehead.

Baby Gideon was passed around the team for cuddles, all the while Spencer kept his arm firmly around you.

The two of you had never been happier. It had been a long road to get here, a sometimes extremely bumpy road but somehow you’d made it through.

As you looked at Spencer, you were overcome with pride. He’d battled his demons and come out the other side. He’d gone to great lengths to get over his addiction so the two of you could have your happy ending.

“What is it?” he whispered to you, stroking back your hair.

“I just love you so much. A few months ago, I never thought we’d be here.”

He kissed you again, caressing your cheek.

“I know my love,” he smiled softly. “It’s been a whirlwind but we made it. I never had my doubts that we would.”

“We should let you all get some rest.” Garcia settled the now sleeping Gideon into the crib next to your bed. “But we will most certainly be back.”

“I can’t wait.”

The team said their goodbyes to you and Spencer but before they could all leave, you spoke again.

“Uh, Luke? Can you stay a moment?”

Luke nodded and the rest of the team took their leave.

“I’m honoured you chose to name him after me.” he smiled at the two of you.

“Well, we probably wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you so it only seemed fair.” Spencer gave him a smile.

“And also, it seemed fitting to name him after his godfather...if that’s something you’d be interested in.” you added.

Luke’s face lit up as he looked from you, to Spencer and then to Gideon.

“Oh wow guys.” he croaked a little. “I would love to be his godfather.”

“Well you took such good care of us,” you laughed.

“So if anything happens to us, you have to do the same for Gideon.” Spencer laughed too.

“I don’t know what to say. It seriously means the world to me.”

Silence descended on the room for a few moments while you all just watched your sleeping newborn.

After a few minutes Luke looked back at the two of you.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice your finger.” Luke smiled, nodding towards your ring. You’d almost forgotten. “When did that happen?”

“Approximately two minutes before Y/N’s water broke.” Spencer chuckled.

“Yeah, I wanted to go to the courthouse and do it before he arrived, but I guess he had other ideas.”

“You know,” Luke smirked a little. “The hospital does have a chapel. And it would only take a minute to get the team back.”

You looked up at Spencer, questioning him.

“What do you think?” you asked him softly.

“I think,” Spencer kissed you. “I would have married you the day we met. And at this point we’re almost eight years late on that.” he chuckled, squeezing your shoulders. “I don’t want to wait any more.”

“Me either.” you agreed. “Let’s do it.” you turned back to Luke. “Let’s get married.”

“I’ll call the team.” Luke smiled before stepping out of the room.

You looked back up at Spencer with the brightest smile.

“I love you so much.” he whispered, cupping your cheek. “Very soon to be Mrs Reid.”

“I love you too Spence.” you laughed a little. “But you did not want to marry me the first time we met.”

“You don’t know that.” he smirked. “Y/N, from the second I laid eyes on you, I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my days with you. I was hooked on you from the moment we met and I’ve been addicted to you ever since. I can tell you with absolute certainty, that you are one habit, I never want to kick.”

***

February 2012

“Goddammit.” You groaned, slapping the side of the coffee maker in frustration.

“Oh, let me help, it’s a little temperamental.” He came running over, like a knight in shining armour. Or more accurately, a knight in a burgundy sweater vest.

You moved aside so he could get to the machine.

He fiddled with it a little and before long, steaming hot coffee started filling your mug.

“There we go. One black coffee.” He picked up the mug, handing it to you with a shy smile.

“My hero.” He smiled back. “Honestly I can’t function without my morning coffee fix.” You laughed.

“You should be careful.” He narrowed his eyes on you. “Caffeine is highly addictive. And although extremely rare, caffeine overdoses are very possible.”

You stared at him wide eyed.

“Uh...ok.” You frowned. “I was only kidding.”

“Oh.” He frowned too. “Oh! Ok, sorry.”

“I’m Y/N. Y/N Y/L/N.”

“Oh right, you just transferred from Andi Swan’s team. How’s Agent Seaver doing?”

“She’s good, she loves it over there.”

He nodded with a small smile.

“Oh gosh sorry, I’m Spencer. Spencer Reid.”

“It’s nice to meet you Spencer Reid.” you held out your hand to shake his and before he could say no, that he didn’t do handshakes, you had taken hold of his hand.

Your hand was soft and warm and looked so delicate in his own much larger hand.

But what really struck him, was how he swore he felt a spark at your touch.

He stared into your eyes and he knew then, if he could only look into one pair of eyes for the rest of his life, he would happily let it be yours.

“Ah I see you’ve met Agent Y/L/N.” Hotch strolled into the kitchen and Spencer snapped his gaze away from you, pulling his hand free of yours.

“Uh yeah. We were just...getting acquainted.” Spencer swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry.

“Ok good. We’ve got a case so we’re gathering.” Hotch grabbed a coffee at lightning speed and was then heading back across the bullpen.

“I guess we should go.” you smiled at him, holding your mug of coffee close to your chest.

“Yeah.” he chewed his lip.

He watched you take your first few steps and he found himself completely in awe of you. Everything about you seemed utterly perfect in Spencer’s eyes.

He didn’t know what it was about you, but after just two minutes Spencer could already picture his whole life with you.

“Uh, Y/N?” he jogged to catch up with you.

“Yeah?” you asked as the two of you headed towards the round table room together.

“I don’t suppose you like foreign cinema? There’s this little theatre in the district that plays the best movies every Wednesday night and no one else will go and see them with me.”

“Subtitled?” you questioned.

“Usually.” he smiled in such an adorable way it made your heart swell.

God how you hated subtitled movies. But for Spencer Reid, you just might make an exception.

***

Addiction is giving up everything for one thing.

Recovery is giving up one thing for everything.

—————————————————————

Taglist -

Semi-Charmed Life -

@mcumorningstar @iamwarrenspeace @magnetas @manuosorioh @bellaswanismysoulmate @spencereidsupremacy @sweetandsunny

@rainsong01 @onlyhereforthefanfics @gubleryum @sunkissglow

@shemarmooresfedora @wheelsupscenehater @a-broken-pact @flipperpenguins @rougewamchop @insomniaticdyke @spencers-dria

All ships & genres -

@muffin-cup @andiebeaword @mggsprettygirl @measure-in-pain @ptrs-prkrs @sexy-dumpster-fire @takeyourleap-of-faith

SR x Reader all genres -

@boxofsparklingmuses @frickin-bats @reidandhisgourd @ukai-hoe

@dreatine @adoringanakin @amesandpineapples @goldeng1rl8 @dr-spencerr-reidd @90spumkin @battinsonn @sleepretreat @dr-spence-reid @thetiniestsupersoldier @spenxerslut

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #spencer reader x you #luke alvez #emily prentiss #penelope garcia #tara lewis #david rossi #matt simmons #jennifer jareau #criminal minds

[jediken0bi]

The Lucky One

Spencer Reid x Reader

Summary:

Spencer has always been good at keeping secrets. This secret just so happens to walk into the BAU to bring him his lunch. The team, supportive as ever, decides to tease him a little and Derek learns a little lesson about making assumptions.

word count: 2763

-

You and Spencer have only been officially dating for about 3 Months.

3 Months, 4 days and 13 hours you hear a voice inside your head. One that sounds suspiciously like Spencers.

You let out a small giggle before shaking your head slightly.

Things couldn't be better between the two of you. You guys had spare keys to the other persons apartment and while that might seem like a rush move for a lot of people you two have agreed that this is the easiest way to maximize your time together. So more often than not, you were staying over at each other's apartment.

You were currently on your way to bring him his lunch since he was in a rush this morning and forgot to take it.

Nothing new to either of you. He often tends to leave his lunch at home only to realize it when he's already on his break resulting in him usually buying himself a cheap sandwich or skipping lunch all together. You decided that, for once, he deserved to have a proper meal. He's been working a lot of overtime lately and it's starting to take a toll on him. On both of you really. He was constantly exhausted and you had to watch him work himself into over drive. Ever since the Hankle case, he's been scared to let even the smallest details go unnoticed which meant that he often spend much longer than the rest of the team on studying the files and trying to solve cases at the speed of light. It's something the team has noticed too over the last couple of weeks. They've been trying to get him to go out with them more often to take his mind off things but he usually rejects them by coming up with some fake excuse.

The reality was that he usually wanted to come straight home to you. He told you the reason he hasn't told the team about you two yet is their constant meddling and involvement in his life. He loves them all dearly and he wouldn't change a thing about either of them, but this was his and his only. He wasn't quite ready to give up the only thing he didn't have to share with anyone. He wanted you all to himself for as long as possible and while you can admit that you were skeptical at first, it's fair to say that you've come to understand Spencers point of view a lot better since then.

So, while you knew all about his team, they knew nothing about you. It didn't offend you though. You are confident that you and Spencer are in this for the long run.

Of course you were slightly worried about running into one of them while bringing him his lunch but that's a risk you were willing to take if it meant that Spencer didn't have to spend another day hungry and exhausted. It's not likely for him to get mad at you if it were to happen anyway. He keeps making small remarks to test the waters.

At this point, he might be scared you don't want to meet his team by the way he's tip toeing around the subject.

Finally arriving at the big scary FBI building you walk inside with caution.

Logically speaking the FBI is the last place you should feel scared to be at, but you can't help but think that this is probably the most intimidating place in the U.S. All those important people in their suits and pencil skirts and their stone cold expressions made you question how Spencer could be so different.

Before you could finish that thought you pass the security check and run straight into someone else on your way to the elevator.

You couldn't get a word out before said person started talking.

"Oh my god i am so sorry, gorgeous! I'm usually more coordinated than this i swear. It's just been a very stressful morning and now i've made yours worse by bumping into you-"

You smile widely as you realize who you must be talking to.

Tech Genius Penelope Garcia

"It's completely fine honestly! It was totally my fault anyway. It's my first time here and i'm a bit nervous"

You felt a bit rude interrupting her but based on the things Spencer told you about her this apology would've went on for at least another two minutes and you would much rather spend that elevator ride having a conversation with her.

After all, she was the BAU sunshine.

And bright she is with her colorful clothes and awesome glasses you think to yourself in that very moment.

It was a nice change of scenery after hushing around serious looking people before.

"Well, looks like we were both a bit dazzled just then! First time huh? Yeah there's definitely something scary about this place. What's a pretty gal like you doing here on a saturday morning? Oh! Are you visiting someone special?", Garcia says in a excited tone before quickly pressing the button taking you two up to the BAU floor.

You were grateful for that because it meant you didn't have to explain why you had to go to that floor too. Of course Penelope was way too hyper to realize i hadn't pressed another button in that moment so i quickly answered her to draw her attention to something else.

"Yeah, i am. I'm bringing my boyfriend his lunch. He hasn't been taking care of himself recently and i want him to at least have a proper meal in his stomach"

Garcia smiled at you with a small nod.

"That's so cute! He is lucky to have you, sweetie. I'm Penelope Garcia by the way!"

She extends her hand and you immediately shake it with a small smile playing on your lips

"I'm Y/N. Very nice to meet you, Penelope"

Not 3 seconds later the elevator doors open and you follow Garcia out of it and straight into the bullpen.

You didn't make it very far before a guy you strongly assume to be the infamous Derek Morgan approached Garcia and, by proximity, you.

"Now that's what you wanna see first thing in the morning! How is my Babygirl?"

Yep, definitely Morgan

"Infinitely better now that i've seen you, hot stuff" says Penelope without even having to think about it.

You can't help but snort at how adorable their friendship is. They're so comfortable with each other.

Derek looks past Garcia and straight at you with curious eyes.

"Well hello mamas. Who do we have here?"

Garcia turns around and has a surprised look on her face when she finally notices you behind her.

"Y/N! I thought you were on your way to meet your boyfriend for lunch?"

I opened my mouth to explain why exactly i was there but Derek beat me to it.

"Now why don't we just forget about that boyfriend and you let me take you out for lunch instead?"

Penelope hits him in the shoulder and i just laugh. Derek looks at me smugly and raises his eyebrows as a way of asking 'What do you say?'

You're tempted to just straight up tell him who you're here for to save everyone from a potentially awkward situation but just as you start talking you see Spencer sitting at his desk focused on his paperwork.

You make the quick decision to simply show Derek instead.

Without saying another word you simply walk past him with a big smile and head towards your destination.

"Hey handsome"

Spencers head shoots up as soon as he hears the familiar sound of your voice. He stares at you with wide eyes. He's clearly shocked to see you and you don't blame him. You just hope he's happy to see you.

"Y/N! What are you doing here?"

Now, if it had been anyone else you're sure this would've sounded rude, but you know Spencer so you know he doesn't mean for it to sound accusing. He's genuinely wondering.

You put on a playful pout.

"Is that a way to talk to the wonderful person who came all the way to the fbi to bring you lunch?"

Spencer finally stands up and looks down on the bag in your hand. He smiles and suddenly it's like he's at home with you. No one else around.

He walks up to you and wraps his arms around your waist.

"No, of course not. Thank you, beautiful"

He presses a small but firm kiss to your waiting lips and you smile up at him.

"You're welcome. I know work has been rough and i thought maybe a proper lunch could make up for some of it. I know it's not a lot and it doesn't cure the bad thoughts but you should know that i made today's lunch with an extra amount of love"

You joke.

You push one of his curls out of his eyes so you can properly look at him. He was already gone by the time you woke up so this is the first you're seeing of him today. He looks tired. Exhausted. And it's breaking your heart.

He gives you a smile that reaches his eyes. The first one in days. There's a feeling of pride blooming inside of you.

"How could i say no to some extra lovin'?"

Your eyes immediately widen and a blush creeps up your face.

"Spence!" You hit his shoulder and he tumbles back a tiny bit, laughing.

"I'm sorry, love. I really am grateful for this. You didn't have to do this"

It's only then that you realize you're not in the confide space of your apartments. You're in the bullpen of the BAU surrounded by Spencers friends and second family.

Spencer seems to realize that too because he suddenly let's go of you and clears his throat.

Confused about what just happened you turn around to spot Derek, Penelope and two women who you assume must be JJ and Emily staring at you with wide unbelieving eyes.

"There ain't no way. Pretty boy!! My man!"

Derek breaks out of his shock first and proudly points between the two of you.

Garcia doesn't waste a second following his example

"Reid is the boyfriend who hasn't been taking care of himself?!"

"What?" JJ, Emily and Spencer all ask at the time.

You can't help but laugh out loud at the absurd situation you got yourself in.

You turn around to look at Spencer. One hand grabbing his chin so he looks at you.

"Yeah, that would be him"

Spencer goes beet red immediately and the team goes wild.

You only smile wider at him and he pulls you back against his chest, wrapping one of his arms back around your waist. He goes to hide his embarrassment by burying his face in your shoulder.

He hates being the center of attention especially when it comes to his team.

"Spence, i didn't know you were seeing someone! How come you hid her from us?"

JJ asks him all excited. She was clearly happy her best friend has finally found someone he loves and trusts.

Spencer grumbles and lifts his head to look at his team.

"I wasn't hiding her! I just wanted something for myself for a little while. We're all up in each others business all the time and i love you guys but it was nice not having to share this part of my life with everyone for a bit. JJ, you did the same when you started dating Will!"

The team looks at each other for a moment and suddenly they all nod understandingly

"Fair enough" they all say.

Spencer hums approvingly and you just smile at the scene before you.

That wasn't that bad! I don't even know what i was afraid of

You were about to bid your goodbyes to the team and Spence so they could get back to work when Dereks next comment urges you to stay for a little while longer.

"Now Reid don't get me wrong but how the hell did you land a smoke show like this? No disrespect kid but i admittedly tried to flirt with her before i knew who she was"

Spencer smiles uncomfortably and shifts from one foot to the other.

"I don't know i guess i was just being myself? I saw her in my favorite book store one day and i just asked her out. Unusual for me, sure, but it's like i didn't have to be afraid with her. I don't know that probably sounds weird"

Your eyes soften and you lay your hand on top of Spencers on your waist. You turn your head a little to press a small kiss to his cheek.

"It doesn't sound weird, Spence. I'm glad you asked me out. I wanted to ask you but i couldn't bring myself to build up the courage. I think you're brave for taking a risk but trust me there was no way i was going to say no to you"

Emily, JJ and Penelope all seemed to melt over the cute interaction between you two but Dereks focus was somewhere else.

He didn't mean any harm you're absolutely sure about that. Maybe it's your instinct to protect Spencer or maybe it's your way of showing him exactly what he's worth but you can't find yourself feeling sorry for what happens next.

"Hold on, you were scared to ask him out? Pretty Ricky over here intimidated you? That's got to be a first"

He laughs with no real malice behind his voice. He's just joking around after all.

Spencer looks down in slight embarrassment at his friends teasing and you decide that now is the time to show them exactly what kind of girlfriend you are.

"I'm not sure we're looking at the same person here Derek because when i was at that bookstore creepily drooling over this hot as hell 6'3 doctor with great taste in literature i knew i had to ask him out. He's the kind of man you want to spend your life with. Not some cheap fling or meaningless 2 week dating experiment. I knew that, once i had him, i was going to hold on to him. So yeah, i was intimidated. It was like staring into your future and i was scared of messing it up. I've never been happier than i am now with Spencer"

Spencer stayed silent the entire time only pressing you closer to him. Once you're finished talking he presses a long firm kiss to your head.

"It's okay. I know, love. Me too"

He whispers loud enough so you could hear it but not loud enough for the rest of the team to hear.

"Woah little mama i meant no offense! I don't call him pretty boy for nothing. I'm just playing with y'all. I love the kid and i'm happy you two have found each other"

He smiles warmly at you and you give him a smile in return.

"I know you didn't. Spence told me all about you guys. I just don't like it when people make assumptions about my relationship with him. Because if anything, i'm the lucky one.

Spencer snorts and you lightly elbow him in the stomach with a grin on your face. You both look at each other with a glint in your eyes

"Agree to disagree" you both say at the same time. It's kind of become your thing. This isn't the first time that debate has been discussed between you two.

"Oh my god they're total nerds in love. Love Nerds!"

Penelope says in a squeaky voice.

You all laugh at her enthusiasm and you turn around to look at your boyfriend once more.

"I better get going. I didn't mean to stay this long anyway. I'll see you tonight? Your place? I'll order us some chinese"

Spencer takes your hand in his and nods with a smile.

"Yeah i'll be there"

You grin and lean up to kiss him goodbye. Seconds before your lips meet you whisper

"You better be. I'm planning on cashing in that promise for some extra lovin' tonight"

You finally press a kiss to lips and turn around as he turns bright red.

"Y/N!!"

You laugh loudly.

"Two can play this game baby!"

You're practically running out of there to avoid any further questioning from his team. All you hear is a chorus of laughter and Spencers embarrassed voice as he tells them to shut up

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid imagines #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid #criminal minds #criminal minds imagines #criminal minds imagine #reader insert

[reidecorating]

L'amore Vero È Così (True Love is Like This)

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female Reader  

A/N: Woke up with a killer headache after celebrating the end of 2020 and thought writing something loosely based off events that took place on NYE would be a good cure. Hope this year’s been treating you all well!

Word Count: 4.3k

Summary: Summer nights and Spencer Reid make it hard for anyone to keep their hands to themselves. Add David Rossi’s holiday mansion and wine to the mix, and watch a dangerously hot fuse ignite

Warnings: Language (as in cursing AND me just completely butchering Italian), unprotected sex, penetrative sex

Masterlist

Maybe it was the Sauternes. Like a spark igniting along the fuse of dynamite, the sweet sting of white grape travelled down her throat, every sip exploding in kaleidoscopic vision and unfiltered words. Even so, it wasn’t the alcohol she was drunk on. No, not drunk - she wasn’t drunk - she was absolutely intoxicated. Not by anything of substance, but by an overwhelming desire for the man she had arrived with. 

Spencer Reid often felt out of place standing in any absurdly large entranceway, belonging to the old Italian with new money, recurrently settling for shifting from shoe to shoe, before taking a deep breath and pressing the doorbell with the hand unoccupied by a bottle he wouldn’t be drinking from. However, his sobriety was far from the cause of his imposter syndrome. Rather, it was the way he always arrived alone, while, what felt like, the rest of the team trickled in with their spouses or significant others. Whilst pairs would dance to vinyl sounds of Bowie, leaving little room for him and the odd number his presence formed in the abacus of the group, he would loiter in a corner, or, on occasion, entertain his godson with a pack of cards. More frequently, he would rattle off excuses about needing the restroom, only to spend his time exploring the corridors of a rather impressive house. A get together at David Rossi’s holiday home was uncommon, and the last time Spencer had wound up here, he found himself inspecting the tiny forgotten library the man housed, attempting to decipher the various foreign books residing on its mahogany shelves as he heard his friends stumbling their way through the Salsa downstairs. L'isola di Arturo, with sterling lettering on its ageing spine showing a familiar pen name, had quickly become his favourite. When he’d first translated the pages, he had chuckled at the parallels between himself and its disconsolate protagonist. However, after years of his ongoing solitude, and lonely arrivals to a castle full of people, he finally had someone on his arm. 

“Wait, what does this mean? I can make out the ‘amore’ but not much else,” That someone now squinted at the words his index finger underlined as he read her the words of that very book, aloud. “Hm?” He was visibly distracted by the Patchouli blend of orange and jasmine emanating from her skin as she leaned against his shoulder to read the page herself. “L'amore vero è così,” she whispered, unsure of the correct pronunciation but attempting it anyway. “Non ha nessuno scopo e nessuna ragione, e non si sottomette a nessun potere fuorché alla grazia umana,” she finished in a whisper, affecting Spencer in a way he hadn’t anticipated. Through fluttering eyelashes, she looked up at him, awaiting his rendition, and suddenly the temperature felt as if it had risen. It wasn’t as if she hadn’t been here almost as many times as him; she knew her way around Rossi’s holiday home, but Spencer had insisted on showing her his favourite room, claiming she hadn’t seen it yet. Diverting her attention from Emily’s anecdotes, “I kind of want you all to myself for a little bit,” he whispered in a kiss on her shoulder, proceeding to take her hand and pull her away from chatter over a jug of Cuban rum and homemade pizza - making sure to dissect, in explanation, nearly every painting adorning the maze of hallways on their short trek. He cleared his throat, prying his gaze away from the skin her little black dress revealed, unabashedly scanning her lips before using his own to form words. “True love is like this,” he subtly eyed her reaction to his words as he tried hard to not transliterate the European language. “It has no purpose and no reason, and it does not submit to any power except human grace.” Spencer’s voice was a newly inked quill, ebbing and flowing through the hot air of the dimly lit room. The dark winged butterflies that had been floating around her stomach all evening fluttered in a frenzy at his words, and the way the chartreuse of his eyes had been absorbed by black as they laid on her. “For such a dark story, it’s so beautiful,” she exhaled in a hushed tone, stare not leaving his as he slowly slid the book into the hollow slot where it had previously inhabited, too occupied by reading her demeanour to pay the book any more attention. “You think so? The author, Morante, Elsa Morante, was actually considered the greatest writer of Italy’s postwar generation, at one point.” Spencer began to rest his weight against the wall as they conversed. “I feel as if we always hear about Bassani or Parise, and all the unorthodox things Landolfi wrote in the fifties. It’s very refreshing to hear of a woman getting some well deserved recognition in such a male dominated niche,” she remarked. A dimple appeared on Spencer’s cheek as he grinned at the way she sounded a lot like him. “Agreed. In fact, Morante actually claimed she wished she’d been born a boy, so that she could have all of these heroic adventures. Once, when she was asked about the hero of that book,” he pointed towards the worn copy of L'isola di Arturo, “she commented: ‘Arturo, c’est moi!’,” 

“Living vicariously through him? Interesting,” she tilted her head slightly, “I also think its remarkable how beauty can emerge from so much pain,” she mulled aloud. His eyebrows raised at her words and the flux in her tone of voice. Slowly, she stepped towards him, forearms resting on his shoulders, entangling behind him. 

Earlier, she’d had the privilege of styling him as he stood in front of their shared mirror, muttering complaints of how he had 'nothing to wear’. Now, she repeated maledictions to herself regarding the clothing she had chosen, in her head, as she admired the way his black shirt was rolled up at the sleeves - displaying intricate nerves shadowing his fingers and arms - and simultaneously unbuttoned temptingly low on his chest, exposing the silver chain presenting a small initial, hers. The summer night had made sure a thin veil of sweat coated his collarbones, glistening with his movements under the lamp light. “It’s not a surprising process though - I mean, after the year you’ve had, just look at how pretty you are,”

“Did you just-” he gulped, chuckling, “use the copious amounts of semi-resolved trauma I harbour to romance me?”

“I may have,” she whispered into the skin below his ear, both hands now tangled in his hair as he remained pressed up against the wall, grateful that every wound, fight and flaw had led them here. And she never ceased to make her gratitude known. Tonight, though, ever since she’d caught sight of his hand gripping a cold glass, the strong concoction presumably belonging to Luke, she hadn’t been able to stop envisioning his body on top of hers. Unbeknownst to her, his thoughts had been very similar from the second she’d chosen to wear the satin fabric, claiming it matched his shirt, while leaving very little to the imagination. “Y/N,” he spoke, his body involuntarily leaning into hers. “We can’t- Not now.” His body language betrayed his words. “I don’t study behaviour for a living, unlike everyone else here, but Spencer, right now, yours tells me we can,” she brought down a hand to squeeze his wrist, which was resting against her lower back. He couldn’t breathe. Tongue in cheek, he shook his head at her, a smirk breaking way. “You, my pretty lady, are something else,” he caved, switching their position in a more urgent manoeuvre than either of them anticipated. Spencer’s hands grasped her jaw, his breath fanning over her before his lips collided with hers, messily. A hand cradled the back of her head, heeding any impact with the wooden blockade behind her, fingers and hair tangling together. Her hands travelled along his body, pinky tugging on his necklace in pursuit of closeness, while her lips roamed around his bobbing Adam’s apple, eliciting an exquisite string of moans. Spencer’s leg wedged itself between hers, slowly grazing his thigh against her, using a firm grip to guide her hips downwards, her soft sighs and tugs at his roots only encouraging him. 

The euphoria was short lived. A rapping on the library door tore them apart, its hinges creaking and giving way to an astounded looking Penelope Garcia. “Naughty!” she factitiously gasped. “I didn’t think the good doctor and his fine missus had it in them, but I was very, very wrong,”

“We were just-“ Y/N began, only to be cut off by the tipsy agent. “Save the excuses, beautiful lady. I was simply quested to find you two, and let you know that the rest of us are off to take a dip in the spa. Bring your boy toy, and scrumptious self, and join us ASAP - oh! And no funny business! There are children here,” Penelope gestured her two fingers away from her spectacles and towards each of them as a silent threat of ‘I’m watching you’. Y/N and Spencer exchanged a look, both flushed in different shades of red, on their way to creating a colour wheel. As Penelope spun on her heels and rushed to shut the door behind her, “Thank you, Penelope!” Y/N squeaked, Spencer exclaiming a timid “And sorry!” The two of them broke out into a fit of laughter, still frazzled. “I think I’m getting a little too comfortable with your team,” she grimaced, earning a laugh from the doctor. Later, as Spencer led her towards a bathroom, her arms occupied by a stack of towels, his hand on the small of her back, he dreaded the amount of self control he would need to invoke when the two of them would undress to change. 

What she had said wasn’t entirely untrue. She was indeed very comfortable with his team. If Spencer could have met himself, a year ago, anxious to introduce who he was sure was the love of his life to his dearest friends, he would flick himself in the head. She, not alarmingly, managed to get along with everyone, almost better than he did. Somehow managing to find common ground, even with Aaron Hotchner. He recalls, one night, months ago, listening to her and the usually stoic man debate about which broadway production was better: The Producers or The Phantom of the Opera. Spencer also recalls exactly how riled up he became as he watched her put the ex-theatric-gone-lawyer in his place after calling upon Spencer for some Tony Award statistics. Admittedly, he actively needed to combat the green eyed monster on his back whenever she would go jogging with Luke - but the way she kissed him before leaving, on her tiptoes in her running shoes, whispering ‘I love you’, and ‘I’m really only going for Roxy’, helped. She had become family, the invisible stamp of approval having been silently awarded when they all saw the looks the two of them shared, the three subtle squeezes in their woven hands, and the way Spencer now smiled with his teeth - the way they way they would move the moon and the earth for one another. 

Packed into the watery sauna, words exchanged between the group travelled into the atmosphere, a waxing gibbous eavesdropping overhead. She watched as Spencer squirmed across from her at the nearness to so many sweaty bodies, shoulders, elbows, knees and toes, belonging to anybody and everybody, poking him. Her eyes trailed along the dips and swells at the base of his neck, decorated in its usual, dainty, shimmering pendant, the bones there protruding as he slouched forward. Spencer’s hair was matted, condensation ironing chestnut ringlets to his forehead, complimenting his heated crimson cheeks. The butterflies returned, her stomach flipping as he ran his hand through the mop of curls to ease his discomfort. More of him - that was what she wanted. She hadn’t noticed, but she had been biting her lip nearly hard enough to draw blood. Pulling her back from her thoughts, a heavy exhale travelled past her left ear, changing the course of the steam emerging from the water - a stream of air enough to deflate a person, she noticed. “I can’t remember the last time I felt this relaxed.” The blonde rested her head against the barrier of the tub, seeing bright patterns on her eyelids as they shut over her eyes momentarily. Y/N reached over and grasped one of her shoulders in a clinical manner. “Who are you, and what have you done with Jennifer and the gruelling tension in her neck and jaw?” She interrogated, lightheartedly. “What can I say? Stress is my middle name,” she chuckled. “While we’re on the topic, though... Maybe you could give me one of those trigger-point massages,” she opened one eye, an iris burning sapphire, the blue only rival to that of the one from The Tell Tale Heart, finding Y/N’s face. Retreating her hand, having made her point, she let out a laugh at JJ’s words, “I’m afraid that’ll cost y-” Y/N’s eyes widened at the familiar dialect of the words, a charlatan on JJ’s tongue. “Wait a minute, can you repeat what you just said, but slowly?” 

“Oh, I know you heard me perfectly clear,” JJ smirked at her, eyebrows raising as her eyes shifted between the flustered woman and Spencer. 

They had a friendship of unfamiliar closeness, which JJ cherished. After nights of babysitting turning into wining with Merlot and dining on flaming dreaded cheese puffs, stashed away in an airtight container, upon JJ’s arrival home, the two had grown close. The agent was grateful for conversation veering away from work, and for someone seeing her from a different lens; one through which she wasn’t fizzled down to a petrie dish of a mother through a workaholic microscope. Y/N was curious to know how her famous mandatory-Spencer-de-stressing-trigger-point massages had come up in conversation between JJ and her, now guilty looking, boyfriend. She crossed her fingers in hopes that he’d spared the details of the events that usually took place following the neck rubs - another kind of de-stressing altogether. “Do you guys hear that? I think Will’s calling me- and I should go put Henry to bed… It’s quite late…” she exaggerated, wearing a redolent expression as she slunk away with a towel around her cold frame. “We’ll talk later, Jareau,” she looked up at JJ, after the shivering woman squeezed her shoulders in a bid goodnight, waving to the small crowd. Swiftly, Y/N’s gaze met Spencer’s, her figure not having left his vision once. 

The yard and small pool was clearing out, save for Luke and Tara bickering in the corner, so, through the bubbling water, she waded in Spencer’s direction, noticing the way he was evidently mentally undressing her. As if by his telepathy, a thin strap of her bathing suit slipped from its place, causing the gears in Spencer’s head to stop turning as he swallowed thickly. “Hey handsome, long time no speak.” A soft smile graced his lips, adoration for her evident, in place of his muted response. Wordlessly, he slipped a finger beneath the strap, tentatively putting it back in place, refusing to break eye contact in some unspoken play for power. “What’re you up to?” She squinted, wondering exactly what his motives were. “Nothing much,” he pulled her closer by the waist, whispering in a gravelly voice only she could hear, “I’m just thinking about how you didn’t get the chance to finish what you started, earlier,”

“Are you implying that you want me to…” she floated onto his lap, hands draping around his neck to steady herself, “pick up where we left off?” The question left her mouth in a breathy whisper, straight into his ear. He turned to look at her, unblinking. “I’m implying, that I’ve had those pretty noises you make replaying in my head all night, and that I’d like to hear them again,”

“Remind me, doctor, which one of us said ‘we can’t’?,” she mocked his whine, rolling her eyes back. “I have a better suggestion, how about you remind me which one of us struggled to stand the last time we played this game?” The calmness of his voice was the antithesis of the fire she was feeling inside her. Satisfied with her speechlessness, his eyes drifted down her body as she pried herself off him, settling in the plastic indent of a hot tub seat to his side. The attention of the pair of lovers were drawn to Tara’s laughter as she stepped into a robe, calling it a night. “What’d we miss?” Spencer’s clueless innocence returned, as if the words he’d spoken before were now out of mind. Devilishly, Tara responded, “Oh, you know, just me completely destroying this man’s ego,”

“Doesn’t take much does it?” Y/N offered Tara her fist in solidarity. “No it does not,” Tara chuckled, bumping it with her own. “You guys do realise that I’m right here?” Luke scoffed, also drying himself off. “I think that adds to their point?” Spencer offered, pursing his lips, amused. “Well, I’m going to go and catch some sleep, and maybe even shed a few tears over what’s been said about me,” he playfully scowled at Tara walking away, throwing a middle finger at him through the air without looking back. “Trust me, they are very professional,” Spencer promised, turning towards his only remaining company in laughter. “I’m sure they are,” she joked returning a smile. 

The two of them talked beneath an ink sky, stars like pinpricks in a blanket twinkling through their conversation, until she found herself on Spencer’s lap, once again, the ambience shifting to something far more carnal. Throughout the night, like a band of elastic stretching between two fingers, the tension between them had heightened. Now, they both tested the limits, anticipating its snap. His chlorine skin tasted electric on her tongue as she painted his neck and chest with a lilac rendition of the silver initial dangling there, letting his sighs catch in the shells of her ears. Allowing her tongue to explore his mouth, his hands tightened around her waist. “Mhm, no, Y/N,” he spoke, regaining his fleeting conscience. “This,” — kiss — “is a bad,” — kiss — “idea,”

“Spencer, look,” she glanced over at the house, and his eyes followed suite, craning his neck slightly. “What do you see?” She asked. “Aside from a house bigger than my entire apartment complex?” Her face was a deadpan. “All the lights are out, Spencer,” she gave him a look that said, come on, profiler, figure it out. Not a single connection formed in his head as he stared at the way the luminous blue of the night time water cast ripples on her skin - skin which was all over his. “All the lights are out… It’s late… and everyone’s asleep,” he reasoned, more to himself than in response to her insinuation. “We have no real chance of getting caught, plus…” her dark eyes were obscured by the eyelashes sheltering them as she tilted her head. “Would it be so bad if we did?” Two of her fingers danced along his chest, walking towards the damp hair at the nape of his neck, using the strands to pull him closer. “Everyone knowing exactly how good you make me feel?” She purred the last part in his ear, tugging at the cartilage with her teeth. Spencer partially whimpered. “Don’t hold back, gorgeous boy. You sound as good as you taste.” His eyes shut as his head hit the rim of the spa - only briefly losing himself once her mouth was on him again. “Someone’s talking like they’re in charge,” he tilted her chin up towards him, forcing her eyes onto his own. “I seem to be the one doing all the work here,” she teased. He kissed each of her collarbones, eyes still trained on hers. “You shouldn’t speak so soon.” With that, he undid the top of her swim suit, exposing her chest to the frigid night air, compelling a gasp. “Truthfully, I’ve been thinking about doing this a majority of the night.” The bass in his voice reached her core. “For someone who is so fastidious about cleanliness, you sure have a dirty, dirty mind, doct-” She never had the chance to finish the honorific, his lips moulding around a hardening nipple, allowing his fingers to toy with the other. Rolling his tongue around the bud, he smiled to himself as he heard her call out his name, over and over, as if her voice was coming through a scratched vinyl. “Where’s all the talk from before?”

“You’re evil,” she groaned, her hips bucking against his board short clad body. 

Spencers lips travelled along the valley of her breasts, only to hike back up them at a tantalising pace, prehensile fingers covering the ground his mouth couldn’t. Her hands grasped so tight in his hair, he was sure the strands would fall out. A groan of his own left vibrations reverberating through her body, causing her heart to jump. “Alright, you’ve had your fun,” he gnarred, as his hands gripped her wrists, holding them behind her back. With his unoccupied hand, he dipped his fingers into what was left of her apparel. “Is this all for me?” He smirked at the ease with which his fingers slipped over her. “Don’t flatter yourself, we’re in water,”

“You’re so impolite - even when I’m spoiling you,” tutted Spencer. Retroceding his hand, determined to leave her on edge, and her skin a mirror image of his, he continued to pin her fragile hands back against the base of her spine. “S-Spencer, please,” her words struggled to make any sense, “please, I need more,” she panted out, moving purposefully along the growing outline in his shorts. The pleasure was overwhelming. Spencer fiddled with the material still covering her, pulling it aside to make way for himself in between her legs. His eyes softened, silently seeking permission, even as she impatiently pulled down his waistband. When she nodded and eased his ailing with a soft, lingering kiss, he slowly pushed himself into her, never failing to be acutely attentive to her comfort as if it was their first time together. “This was what you were after?” Teased Spencer, his hips speeding up. “So badly,” she uttered out a sigh. “Then take it like you want it.” She craved his adept touch, and she made that known. “S- Spencer, oh god,” she groaned, “you feel so fucking good.” His breathing became heavier, softs grunts and hisses filling her ears with every movement. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, whining in a destitute way at the full feeling. At a slower pace, one of Spencer’s hands guided her hips along himself, while the other traced infinity on her sensitive nerves. “Sweet girl- fuck, you feel like a dream,” he moaned as she tightened around him. Her toes curled, the warm water of the pool splashing her bare skin. Spencer occupied all of her senses, the same way she did his. “I’m so close,” she whimpered, before he used his nose to nudge her face upwards, her momentarily open eyes reflecting constellations. Spencer kissed her once more. Her hands long freed from his grip, she left traces of herself in the form of tiny red sickles on his freckled back as her nails released some frustration. 

Dragging her fingers along his torso, she felt the muscles of his stomach tighten, hers doing the same. Shaky sighs wavered from her lips at the bliss Spencer was providing. “Keep your eyes open for me, angel,” she tried her hardest to focus on his lustfully blown pupils. “That’s it. Just look at what you do to me,” he gasped out, head falling backwards, eye contact broken - only for a second - before he gulped and looked back at her. “You’re breathtaking,” she whispered, hoarsely, stroking his sweaty cheekbone with her thumb.  She could recognise the golden gates of heaven in his eyes as he came undone inside her, warmth spilling over her in every aspect. The knots in her stomach loosened shortly after his, curses spilling from both of them. She rode him through his release, fond of the way he left light kisses on her temple, whispering compliments and confessions of love. Once he was sure she’d caught her breath, and some air had returned to his own lungs, he kissed her, gently, in the summer sauna heat, beneath the stars.

A loud cough startled the two. Stood in the open French doors of the veranda, scotch in hand, and eyes screwed shut, was David Rossi. Their minds were in the same place, wondering why they hadn't listened to Penelope’s drunken advice. “When you two are done, please remember to turn the tub lights off - and put the filter on high.” She hid herself in Spencer’s chest, heartbeat in her ears, contemplating holding her breath for a really, really long time. Spencer was flushed red, his own nose buried in her neck so as to not face the older man. “Or better yet, put some money together to buy me an entirely new spa,” Rossi, laughed, opening one eye to catch sight of Spencer giving him a shameful thumbs up. Even as Rossi wandered away, their embarrassment remained a fresh burn. Spencer groaned as her tired hand fumbled with his disastrous hair, “I don’t even want to begin thinking about how much of that he heard,”

“Or saw,”

“Don’t!”

“I’m never going to be invited here ever again, am I?”

#this got long! #yes there is no tag list i’m so sorry it’s because i still haven’t actually gotten around to doing it #but just know it’s on its way! next time my loves <3 #anyway it’s almost four in the morning and i wanted this out #criminal minds fic #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fluff #matthew gray gubler #mgg fic #mgg smut #mgg x reader #matthew gray gubler imagine #spencer reid imagine #cm fanfic #mgg #mine: writing

[aubreyprc]

happier

for @ssa-sparks , who asked for happier+hotchniss💕💘 feel free to send requests, ask/message💖💗💞💘💓

part four of my sour series

ao3

“Say you love her, baby,

Just not like you loved me

And think of me fondly,

When your hands are on her

I hope you're happy,

But don't be happier”

-

It hits her sometimes, how close she was to having everything before her life unravelled, leaving nothing but chaos in its wake. Leaving her too broken to even attempt at rekindling something with him, too messed up to think he could ever truly feel the same for her as he did before. Before Ian, before Boston. Before he learnt of Lauren, and how she’d shared her body and a bed with a known terrorist for two years as part of a job.

She’d been cruel when she ended it, forcing words out of her mouth that she didn’t mean in order to keep him safe. She remembers the look on his face when she’d called them casual, can remember the words he spat right back at her as she left.

She remembers how forgiving he was when he sat at her hospital bed. Grabbing her hand gently while he whispered gentle words, placing a soft kiss on her lips as he promised her that he would do whatever it took to get her back the team. Back to him.

She can also remember just how different everything was when she returned, how absolutely nothing was the same between her and anyone on the team, but especially him.

She remembers the moment it ended, the moment he told her he wanted her, but they needed time. She should recover from everything that she’s been through and they’ll talk when it’s time. They’ll know when it’s time.

Yet that time never comes, the two of them moving further and further apart as months go by and soon they’re not even talking. She accepts with a heavy heart that it’s truly over when it’s obvious he’s started to see someone new.

It hits her again with force, like a harsh slap to the face (which, she thinks she would have preferred. It probably would have hurt less) how close she was to having everything when she hears the name Beth fall from his lips, talking in his office with Dave with a glass of whiskey. (something the three of them used to do, but she won’t dwell on it. She can’t. It hurts too much) Her plan was to just hand him her report and leave. Ignore the way his eyes would linger on her for a moment too long to be friendly, words he refuses to say on the tip of his tongue as he watches her walk away without a word. Absolutely nothing let to say between the two of them. They had something, something remarkable, something that a person only gets once and it was taken from underneath them because of her, and as she stands outside of his almost but not quite shut door, she freezes, the soft tone the other woman’s name being said in rendering her frozen, the wind completely knocked out of her.

It could have seen seconds, it could have been hours before she clears her throat, tapping three times softly on the door before opening it.

“The report,” she smiles, walking to his desk, setting it down gently with a fake smile while her broken heart hammers in her chest. “Night.” She smiles to the two men, nodding her head in farewell and she turns to leave.

“Can we talk, tomorrow?” He asks her and she closes her eyes, holding down the door handle as she takes a deep breath before turning, her fake smile back on her face.

“Sure,” she agrees, “is that all?”

He nods, sending her back a smile that doesn’t seem like his and she wonders then, if he can see right through hers. Nodding again, she leaves his office, taking deep breaths, holding back her tears as she grabs her coat and bag before swiftly existing the building.

She’s in the comfort of her own car when she lets them fall, can feel them rolling down her cheek as she speeds out of the parking garage, as though she can out run the heartache.

To Emily’s surprise he comes to her the next night, knocking on her apartment door at too much of a late hour for it to be anything professional and as she lets him in, watches as he looks around her new apartment she inhales a deep breath and prepares herself for whatever words he was about to speak. Maybe he’ll finally say the ones that have been on the tip of his tongue for the last three months, she thinks.

“I take it you heard?” He questions, looking at her for the first time since he walked in.

“About Beth? Yeah…” She tells him, sending him a sad smile.

“I was going to tell you first, before-” He stops, shaking his head. “You should have found out from me first hand and for that I’m sorry.” He tells her.

“It’s fine,” she smiles, “I’m glad you’re moving on. You’ve seemed happier these last few weeks.”

“Emily-” He starts to say, only to be stopped by her a moment later.

“Really, Aaron.” She smiles, “It’s okay, we ended and you moved on, it’s normal.”

“Yeah,” He says, “I just wanted to apologise, for not telling you first hand.” He smiles.

“No hard feelings,” she jokes, a small laugh escaping her throat. “Did you want to talk about anything else?”

He stays silent for a few moments, mulling over the words in his head as he ponders about saying them, ponders about opening up old wounds.

“No,” He says, deciding to draw a line on what could have been, choosing instead to try and work on gaining her back as his friend. His close friend. Maybe his best. “No that’s it.” He tells her with a smile.

She nods, leading the way to her front door, almost closing it as he steps out only to stop when he turns back to face her.

“You know you’ll always have me, right?” He questions shyly, as if he’s unsure, “No matter what…”

She stares at him, clearing her throat before speaking.

“I know.” She tells him softly, smiling as her eyes meet his properly since he walked out three months ago. “I know.”

“Good.” He nods, “Good night.”

“Goodnight.” She smiles, watching him walk off before closing her door, his words ringing in her ears like a siren.

Knowing about Beth and meeting, Beth, turn out to be two completely different feelings.

You can ignore the existence of someone you’ve never met, trick yourself into thinking that they’re no one, that’s it’s nothing.

You can’t ignore them however, once you’ve met them. Seen first hand the happiness written over their faces.

That’s something Emily learns while hungover, stood at the finish like of a triathlon, staring at Aaron’s smile as he hugs the other woman, the way his eyes almost shimmer as he looks at her…Beth. The happiness that radiates of him causes her stomach to turn and she has to look away while she does her best to ignore their laughs, turning to watch him, Beth and Jack walk away, her heart cracking in her chest as she watches him smile into their kiss, forcing herself to look away and follow JJ and Penelope to Reid’s car, throwing on a smile while spilling a lie about her head when they ask why she looks like she’s just seen a ghost.

The conversation with Regina sends her right back to where she started, hitting home more than she would have liked and she knows its obvious when Hotch lets her go back to the hotel, telling her she was done for the day and to take sometime to herself.

She’s no idea how much time had past, how long she’d been staring at the ceiling replaying how well her life was going before Ian had found her, how happy she was, maybe the happiest she’d ever been. She thinks about how he’d run a hand down her spine as they spoke in hushed whispers in his bed, confessions and laughs shared between the two in the late hours of the night, as though they were the only two people in the word. She thinks about how he’d cup her jaw gently before kissing her if she babbled on too much, leaving them both smiling into their kiss, pure happiness written on both their faces as they each tore further into the others heart, the feeling of forever lingering in the air as they wrapped themselves in each other.

She turns her head to the door at the gentle three taps and sits up, running a hand through her hair as she walks over, already knowing who it is before she even opens the door.

“Hey,” He says softly, passing her as she moves aside to allow him in. “Are you okay?”

“I will be,” She tells him, “Just a tough case.”

“I know how hard it must have been, to listen to Regina.”

“It’s fine,” She tells him, “She was right. Mine is dead.”

“Doesn’t make it any easier.” He tells her from experience and she looks down, wiping her tears just as quick as they fall but not quick enough, already feeling him talking steps towards her before stopping mere inches away, cupping her face gently as he had done so many times before, and wiping her tears.

“It’s going to be okay.” He tells her gently, her eyes meeting his and in that moment it’s easy to let themselves believe for a second it’s him and her again, that there’s no Beth, no Ian and no Boston, just them, a mere year ago, happy and on their way to love. 

His lips are almost on hers when she places to flat hands into his chest, pushing him away slowly as she drops her head.

“We can’t,” she whispers, “You’re with Beth.”

He steps back, “sorry, I should…I should go.” He mumbles, looking around the room as he clears his throat.

The words I want you die on his tongue as he forces himself to walk out of the room, flashes of their nights together playing on a loop in his brain as he screws his eyes shut.

They don’t talk about what almost happened.

She continues to watch his happiness increase as months go by, and carries on pretending that she’s fine, that she isn’t dying inside with every passing moment she spends watching him smile at another woman, watching him be happy with someone else.

He finds her for the second time at JJ’s wedding, a few hours after their previous conversation. He comes up to the side of her, smiling as she laughs at one of his lame jokes and as she turns to face him, he stills, a look on her face one he hasn’t seen before.

“Do you love her?” She asks softly, and he nods.

“I do.” He tells her and she rolls her lips, nodding her head as she forces herself not to cry. “But not like I loved you.” He continues and her eyes snap up to his, examining his features for a tell he’s lying and failing, her heart beating rapidly against her rib cage. She stares a few more moments, before gently placing a hand on the side of his face, catching his lips with her own in a delicate kiss, looping her hands to rest on the back of his neck when his arms softly wrap around her waist and pull her into him.

Their foreheads rests together as they separate and she smiles sadly.

“I miss you already.” He whispers, pulling her into a hug.

“Be happy.” She whispers back, before pulling from his arms and smiling at him, the words but please don’t be happier with her than you were with me renaming unsaid, taken instead by, “You should go, I’m sure Jack will be looking for you.”

He nods, turning to face the garden, before looking back at her.

“Go,” She laughs sadly, “I’ll be right out.”

He squeezes her hand before walking off and once he’s out of view, she takes a deep breath and turns, catching a glimpse of him, Jack and Beth as they laugh together in a corner, and even though it kills her, she has to be happy for him, she loves him, and with a heavy exhale she knows that’s all she wants, for him to be happy, even if it is without her.

She flies to London and he lets her go. He lets her go without ever telling her that it’s her he was ever truly happy with. Starting to find far too many similarities within Emily and Beth. He sees Emily’s face sometimes when he kisses Beth, imagines it’s her spine he’s tracing his fingers across and thinks of her when he envisions forever.

He ends it with Beth six months later, a tumble of apologies falling from his mouth as she walks out with a sad smile and a nod.

“You should call her.” Beth says as she stands in the doorway, “Emily.” She tells him as he frowns, his eyes widen and then she’s gone.

He calls her two weeks later and three weeks after that, is standing in front of her door, drenched head to toe as he waits for her to answer.

The smile she gives him when she opens the door makes the terrible weather and the awful traffic worth it and when her lips crash into his, he realises he’s never needed anyone but her to be happy.

fin

#hotchniss sour series #hotchniss fic #hotchniss #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner #aaron x emily #criminal minds fic #hope you like it bestie <333 #my fics

[moon-light-jukebox]

Our boy - [Reid x Reader]

Summary: Spencer Reid is anything but calm when his wife, reader, goes into labor.

Pairing: Spencer Reid / (Female) Reader

Rating: Wholesome AF

Word Count: 2.3k

Category: Pure fluff. Maybe some angst if you squint, just because childbirth is angsty.

Content Warning: None that I can think of.

A/n: This is just a quick little idea that popped into my head earlier. I wrote it all in one go. We don’t get enough Dad!Spencer. 😊 Reader’s labor was inspired by true events. 

y/n = your name. italicized block of text is a flash back.

-- Our boy -- 

“Babe, you have got to calm down.” I didn’t even bother opening my eyes to look at my husband; I was too tired.

His voice was as close to a squawk as I have ever heard. “I am calm, y/n!” That had me cracking one eye open to stare at him, which caused him to huff out a short laugh. “Okay, maybe I’m not calm. But how can I be calm?” His beautiful brown eyes were swimming with worry. “This has taken such a long time, and you’re so tired. The doctor said things haven’t been progressing.”

“Oh, come on, doctor,” I said teasingly. “I’m sure that big brain of yours knows that it’s not uncommon for first time mothers to labor for a long time.”

“But it’s been thirty hours,” he protested.

“I’m aware. Talk to your son.” I pointed to my very large stomach. “This is his show.”

That caused him to smile, the first real smile I had seen on his face since he arrived here, about an hour after I did. We knew this was coming, I was overdue, our son choosing to stay inside my body for 41 weeks and 6 days. The doctors had said if I hit 42 weeks that we needed to discuss inducing labor. Because of that conversation, Spencer wasn’t with the rest of the team, they were on some case in god knows where, instead he was helping at headquarters with Penelope. The same woman I had called when my water broke. I wanted to call Spencer, I really did…but my husband is prone to overact, especially in situations like this.

Turns out calling Penelope wasn’t any better.

--

“Hello, Mrs. Dr. Reid!” she had chirped.

“Hi Penelope. Is my husband around?”

“He is with the second love of his life.”

Which meant he had made a coffee run. I laughed, despite the pain rippling across my stomach. “Okay, well, I need you to pull him away for the first love of his life. My water just broke.”

There was a beat of silence before the screaming started. “YOUR WHAT JUST WHAT?!”

Just at that moment I heard him in the background. “Garcia,” my husband said. “Who’s what did what?”

“Penelope, be-“

It was no use; she had already started screaming at him. “YOUR WIFE! YOUR SON IS TRYING TO EXIT HER LADY BUSINESS! WE HAVE TO GO!!”

They then promptly hung up, only to call back a few minutes later and ask which hospital I was at.

--

There was a knock on the door, drawing me out of my memories. “Mrs. Reid?” the doctor called before walking into the room. She was a short woman with curly grey hair; Spencer and I had never met her before, she was just the doctor on call, but something about her demeanor put me at ease.

I gave her a wan smile. “Hey Doc.”

She marched into the room them, no nonsense to be found; which was unfortunate, I was a very big fan of nonsense as perfectly highlighted by the man I chose to marry. “Mrs. Reid, I need to check to see where you’re at,” she said, already snapping on her gloves.

“Knock yourself out.” At a certain point during labor modesty just vanishes. I don’t even want to think about how many people have seen my vagina today.

I felt some pressure for a few seconds before she pulled back. “You’re still at 5 centimeters.”

This comment got a groan from my husband. “But she has to get to 10!”

“I’m aware, Dr. Reid.”

“She’s been in labor for 30 hours and 23 minutes and 16 seconds!”

“I am also aware of that, Dr. Reid,” she said, suppressing a smile. “Which is why we need to have a little chat.” She turned to me. “Mrs. Reid, I’m concerned about the baby.”

That caused mine and Spencer’s spines to stiffen. “What,” I asked. “Why? Is something wrong?”

“Not yet,” the doctor said hurriedly. “We have been monitoring your contractions and vitals…but we also monitor the baby’s heartrate. It’s nothing to be too alarmed about now, but his heartrate has slowed a bit.”

“But what does that mean? Is he in destress?” My husband asked; he sounded so afraid that I instinctively reached out to grasp his hand.

“It means he’s tired, Dr. Reid.” She offered us a small smile. “Mrs. Reid isn’t the only one going through this. The baby is too. Like I said, it’s not low enough to be an issue now, but if it drops much lower, we need to discuss other options.”

“…he’s tired?” my voice cracked on the last word, tears already pricking in the corners of my eyes.

“Baby,” Spencer whispered, leaning over to place a kiss on my temple. “It’s alright.”

I shook my head. “It’s not. It’s not alright. He’s my baby, Spencer. He’s our baby,” I all but bawled at him. “Our baby is tired.” I’m sure one day I’ll look back at this moment and feel silly for how upset I had become…but I was so tired, and while the epidural numbed the pain, I still felt it. All of that I could endure, but I couldn’t endure this.

“I know,” he soothed. “But he’s fine. He’s okay.”

“I want to discuss other options,” I said, meeting the doctor’s gaze. “What are they?”

The doctor nodded, “Well, we could start a Pitocin IV. That’s a medicine we use to-“

“Cause the uterus to contract and speed up or induce labor,” Spencer interrupted, causing me to laugh, despite my tears. Even in times like this he was still…Spencer.

The doctor did not share in my amusement. “Yes,” she huffed. “That is one option. It runs the same risks, if his heartrate drops, we’ll need to move you to the O.R.” I gulped and Spencer squeezed my hand. “The other option is to take you back to the O.R. now.”

I looked over at Spencer, his eyes were wide and frightened, his always messy, curly hair was in a worse state than usual, his clothes were wrinkled. “I want our boy, Spence.”

He just nodded, bringing our joined hands up to his mouth to press a kiss to my knuckles. “It’s up to you, y/n. You know I’ll support whatever you want.”

Spencer gave me the courage to turn to face the doctor. “Let’s do it.”

--

Things progressed very quickly and very slowly at the same time. The room started bustling with different people doing different things to get me ready. Spencer called Penelope, who called the rest of his team, who were now all in the waiting room. How much Spencer’s co-workers at the FBI cared about him made me smile; they were his family, and by extension my family. Our little boy was going to be the most well looked after child in history.

Before I knew it, I was laying on my back in the operating room, a blue sheet put up just below my boobies. Apparently, most people didn’t want to watch themselves have a c-section. I couldn’t but laugh at the absurdity of the moment.

“What is it, my love?”

I turned my head to look at Spencer. His clothes were covered by some sort of yellow outfit, his hair was stuffed in one of those blue hat’s hospitals make you wear, I’m sure he could tell me the proper name, even his shoes were covered. One of his hands was gripping mine, the other slowly stroking the top of my head.

“I was just thinking about everything. Remember when we met?”

I realized how silly it was to ask a man with an eidetic memory if he remembered something right after I said it, something with which he agreed, given the look on his face. “Yes, y/n, I remember.” His hand squeezed mine tightly. “It was a Tuesday morning, at 7:34 a.m. You had on black pants and a light blue top, you didn’t notice me, but I thought you were the most beautiful girl in the world.”

That caused a tear to slide down from the corner of my eye, only to be wiped away by my husband. “I didn’t notice you because you were in line behind me,” I teased.

“That’s no excuse,” he insisted. “I would notice you anywhere.”

That made my heart squeeze in my chest. “I must be pretty special,” I surmised. “I pulled your attention away from coffee.”

His voice was breathy, his eyes shimmering. “You’re the most special thing in the entire world, y/n. I don’t know what I did to deserve you. I don’t know how I got the courage to speak to you when you walked by me, but I’ll be grateful that I did it for the rest of my life.”

It was my turn to reach up and wipe a tear from his face. “I’m glad you stopped me,” I whispered. “Our little guy probably is too.”

Spencer didn’t laugh like I expected him to; instead he bit his lip, his eyes bouncing from my face to the blue curtain that separated us from the doctors.

“What is it, baby?”

He swallowed, letting out a shaky breath. “I’m scared, y/n,” he whispered. “I’m afraid that I won’t be any good at this. I never had a dad…What if I’m not everything he needs me to be?”

I felt my heart crack in half. “Spencer, that’s not possible,” I insisted, ignoring the way he started to shake his head. “You could never let anyone down, especially not your family. Especially not your son. You are going to be the most amazing father. You’re going to love our son so much; you already do love him that much, Spence.”

He was crying in earnest now. “But, y/n,”

Spencer never got to finish that sentence. The doctor suddenly interrupted our hushed conversation. “Okay, dad,” she called. “Here he comes!”

My husband placed a kiss on my forehead before he stood up, looking over the curtain. He had insisted beforehand that he wasn’t going to look; he said he didn’t want to see me like that, but I knew he’d end up looking. My husband was far too curious to do anything else.  

A shrill cry cut through the air, causing my heart to stop. That was him. I had never heard him cry before, but I knew that sound as sure as I knew my own name; that was my son.

Spencer and I were crying when the doctor brought him around the curtain so I could see him. He was wrinkly, red, and looked positively furious. I had never loved anything more.

They took him to the examination room to make sure he was breathing okay. Spencer had told me after c-section births this was normal. “They don’t get squeezed when they’re born,” he had said. “So, the nurse checks them over, weighs them, all that.”

He looked down at me, tears streaming down his face, then back towards our son.

“Go,” I urged him. “Go get our boy, Spence. I’m fine.”

--

Spencer’s head poked through the door of my room. “Are you ready?” he asked.

“REID. If you don’t get the fuck out of my way and let me see my godson I swear to GOD.”

“Oh,” I groaned, giggling slightly, despite the pain. “Please don’t make me laugh.”

I don’t know if Spencer moved willingly or if Penelope had just had enough, but soon the door was thrown open and a parade of people poured inside.

“Oh, my god, Mrs. Dr. Reid,” Penelope gushed, her hands hovering over my son, then back up towards my face. “You look like an angel. How did you just have major surgery? How did you just give birth, because a c-section is giving birth-“

“Penelope,” I cut her off. “Do you want to see him?”

“Gimme.”

I pulled the blankets down around his body, staring at his little face before I handed him over.

“Oh, my mother effin god,” she whispered, looking around at everyone else in the room. “He is the most beautiful child I have ever seen. He even looks like a genius. I don’t know if you can look like a genius, but I think he does.”

“You don’t have to whisper, Garcia,” my husband said, coming to stand beside me, leaning over to kiss my forehead again. “She is right though, Mrs. Dr. Reid. You’re beautiful.”

“Quit hogging the baby,” JJ said, reaching for him. “I’m the co-god mother. Hand him over.”

Emily leaned over JJ’s shoulder, staring at him with a look of wonder. “What did you guys decide to name him?”

“Arthur,” I said quietly. “His name is Arthur Spencer Reid.”

--

The room was dark when I opened my eyes, my head turning towards the tiny cry that woke me up.

“I know, I know,” my husband whispered to the tiny bundle in his arms. “I miss your mom too; she’s the best person in the world and I wish she could be awake all the time too.” I bit my lip, trying to suppress my laugh. “But you have to let her sleep some, little man.” My son gave another cry. “I know, believe me.”

“What are you doing?” I asked, my voice thick with sleep.

“Talking to Arthur,” he said simply. “You know, speaking to a child whenever they reach the babbling stage of their cognitive development is actually very important. It encourages them to learn the language they’re hearing. You know, children are actually experts at learning languages. Studies have shown that children that become fluent in a language before the age of 13 are often able to fool native speakers into thinking they’re native speakers themselves.”

“Huh,” I said, smiling like a dope. That was my Spencer. “Did you hear that, Arthur? It sounds like your dad wants to teach you some languages.”

“Only a couple,” he whispered to our boy. Then he looked up at me, his eyes bright, despite the dark circles under them.

“You’re tired, babe,” I said, moving to sit up. “Give him here, you can get some rest.”

He just shook his head. “No, I’m alright. You rest.” Spencer looked down at his son again, who was already back to sleep. “No dream I have could be better than this.”

As usual, Dr. Spencer Reid was absolutely right.

-- 

Taglist: @rachelxwayne​ @pinkdiamond1016​ @sickeninglyshoujo @justagirllookingforherplace 

#Spencer Reid #Dr. Spencer Reid #Spencer Reid x Reader #Spencer Reid x y/n #Spencer Reid x you #Spencer Reid fluff #Reid fluff #Criminal minds fluff #Criminal minds imagine

[cacoetheswriting]

champagne problems, ch.10

Spencer is in love with you, but you’re engaged to someone else.

Chapter Ten: Feels Like We Only Go Backwards: A choice is made. A/N: chapter is titled after this song if you want to listen while reading. Word Count: 2.4k Warnings: swearing, heartbreak, unrequited / unreciprocated love, jealousy, talk of breakup/s, serious serious angst, disclaimer [& spoiler warning], this chapter is not a happy one. this whole series is a real slow burn.

series masterlist

A/N: as always, thank you for all the love you’re giving this story. we have about six chapters left to the end and words cannot describe how grateful i am to you for sticking with me and my rambling writing. ENJOY !

-

A significant weight was lifted off Spencer’s shoulders the second he told you how he truly felt about you. Actually, it was more the second you said you loved him back.

Even though the two of you distanced yourselves from one another, giving you the space to really think about your future and who you wanted to spend it with, the week that followed the admissions was considerably good.

Yes, the brunette doctor continued to feel uneasy about the situation he put you in. Uneasy about the choice you eventually would have to make. However, as days went by he noticed it didn't seem to bother you. No. You were oddly chirpy and cheerful. Spencer couldn't help but feel like it was because of him.

Like your choice was already made, and that choice was him.

“Do you have plans tonight?” You asked in a hushed tone, slyly glancing around the bullpen to ensure no-one else was paying attention to you and the doctor.

Spencer shook his head. “Not entirely, no.”

Your lips curled into a smile at his response. “So you wouldn’t mind if I came over?” You asked, gently tapping your fingers in a walking motion against his desk. They stopped next to his hand - you could feel it was there, yet you didn't move your fingers further in fear of someone seeing. “There’s something I want to talk to you about.”

Spencer mouth twitched into a pleasant smirk. He should have been nervous, what if you were going to break the news you were choosing Ethan? He should have been anxious, the thought of losing you all over again, he couldn't imagine how awful that would feel. Yet he didn't feel any of those things.

Judging by your relaxed body language. Your hand just aching to touch his. The way your eyes glistened looking at him. Your elated tone as you spoke. It didn't take a genius, a profiler, or even someone that knew you as well as him, to say these were all indicators whatever you wanted to talk to him about was happy.

“Of course.” He cleared his throat. “What time do you think-”

“I’ll let you know, okay? I know you like to switch off for the weekend so keep your phone on you for me.” You traced a finger against his knuckle and with one last smile, ambled elegantly towards the exit.

Yes - Spencer deducted - whatever you wanted to tell him was going to be good news.

A knock on the door grabbed Spencer’s attention. He quickly examined the place one last time, to ensure everything was clean and, well, perfect for you.

Satisfied, he eagerly crossed his living room and without thinking twice, expecting to see you on the other side of the door, he opened it.

“Hey Spencer.”

But it wasn’t you. It was the last person he ever expected to see.

“E-Ethan, what ehm, what are you doing here?” Spencer asked.

Ethan smirked at the question, slowly sliding his hands into the pockets of his coat. “We need to talk, don’t you think?”

Spencer swallowed, but before he got a chance to reply the surgeon continued. “Actually, I’ll talk and you can listen. Also don’t bother inviting me inside because I’ll keep this brief and to the point.”

Your fiancé cleared his throat. “Imagine my surprise when I found out my wife-to-be still has feelings for her ex boyfriend. Did you know she is actually on her way here to tell you she’s choosing you? Yeah... Now, she doesn't know that I know. Her plan is to inform me tomorrow, after my shift at the hospital, that the wedding is no longer happening and our relationship is over.” He paused, almost as if he was daring Spencer to interrupt him at any moment and defend your honour.

Which in hindsight is something Spencer should have done.

“So here’s how this is going to do, doctor.” He slurred. “When she comes here, you're going to turn her down. You've broken her heart once before, I’m pretty sure you know how to do it again.”

Spencer stepped forward and opened his mouth to protest, but the surgeon impolitely cut him off. “Look, you’re a smart guy. Some sort of genius, right? I think deep down you know Y/N is better off with me. I can provide for her in ways you can't even comprehend. I am going to give her a life you can only dream of Spencer.”

“I think you’re forgetting it’s not all about the money.” Spencer stated coldly. His eyes narrowing. Jaw clenching.

Ethan chuckled callously. “Of course not. But I think you need to consider how much disposable income can improve life. I have the ability to ensure we buy our dream home. I have the ability to invest in a second home for her father, and move him somewhere closer to us. With me, Y/N will be able to quit her job and no longer risk her life on a daily basis. She will be able to spend time with our future kids, in a beautiful home, completely care free.”

He let out a deep sigh. “Did she even tell you she’s been thinking about transferring out of the BAU? She doesn't want to be a profiler anymore. Fuck man, she doesn't even know if she wants to be a SSA anymore. The only reason she’s sticking around is you.”

The statement caught Spencer completely off guard. Ethan had to be bluffing, right? He would say anything to ensure you stayed with him, right?

“You’re lying.” Spencer grumbled through his teeth.

Ethan smirked in response. “I’m really not though. Ask anyone. Her dad, it was actually he who suggested it in the first place. Or your friend Penelope, she seems to think it’s a good idea.”

Spencer’s world was crumbling down around him and he was helpless to stop it. Why didn't you tell him this was on your mind? Why did you keep this a secret? And how did he not see any inclination of this before?

“Like I said, you’re a smart guy Spencer.” Ethan stated. “I think you know what the right thing to do is.” And with that, he walked away leaving the brunette agent alone with his thoughts.

Slowly, Spencer closed the door. He turned on his heel and leaned against it while letting out a long winded breath, one he didn't even realise he was holding.

He never wanted to stand in the way of your plans. He didn't want to be the one holding you back from anything. Was his ever growing love for you clouding his judgement?

He closed his eyes, resting against the door behind him. The guilt he was now feeling riddled him from head to toe. And mixed with the guilt was a faint feeling of anger. Anger directed at the man that dared to get between your relationship with the brunette agent.

Ethan, a name of Hebrew origin that means firm, enduring and strong. A good name for good people.

Spencer knew off many Ethan’s in his lifetime. His college friend, an old colleagues son - all people that definitely lived up to the meaning. Yet your fiancé was anything but.

This Ethan was arrogant, rude, possessive. In Spencer’s mind, this Ethan was quite literally the physical embodiment of the curse word dick.

He never truly understood what you saw in the guy. He always thought you could do a lot better. Even if it wasn’t Spencer himself, there are men out there a lot kinder than Ethan.

And yet, despite all of the resentment he felt towards the man, Spencer couldn't help but feel like there was some truth to what he had said. The hazel-eyed man started doubting himself. Doubting whether he really had your best intention at heart, or whether his own selfishness was preventing him from making sure you’re living your best life.

This was supposed to be a happy day. A happy evening. 

It certainly started out that way. You were on your way here to tell him you were choosing him. You were choosing to spend the rest of your life with him.

Spencer felt sick to his stomach. Dizzy. He was sure if he opened his eyes even just for a second he would collapse. He also knew the only rational thing, the right thing to do will only make him feel worse.

The brunette agent wasn’t entirely sure how long he stood frozen like that. His breathing shallow. Heart sinking, heavy.

A knock on the door behind his back caused him to slowly open his eyes, yet he didn't move an inch. He simply couldn't. He couldn't bare to face you. He couldn't bare to look you in the eye and break your heart for a second time.

Instead, he chose the childish way out. He hoped if he was still enough, quiet enough, you would think he wasn’t home and leave. It is a conversation that cannot be avoided, but it would be a conversation for another day.

You knocked again, using a little more strength this time.

Spencer held his breath. Tears began to form in his eyes. Salty droplets that if he let escape, he knew they wouldn't stop falling.

He heard faint shuffling outside and for a split second he thought you gave up and walked away. For a split second he thought he bought himself more time. More time with the fantasy that the two of you would get your happy ending together. Foolish, he thought.

It was in that moment the mobile device in the back pocket off his pants started to buzz, vibrating against the door. The phone you asked he kept close to him earlier that day. The sound of the ringtone followed soon after completely giving away Spencer’s current location.

“Spencer?” The sweet sound of your voice coming through the wooden barrier between you caused the tears he was fighting to slowly trail down his face. The device stopped ringing. “I know you’re in there. Can you let me in?” You said, so blissfully unaware of what was about to happen.

Spencer turned around and pressed his forehead against the painted wood. His hand travelled to the door knob, yet he still didn't move any further. “I-I... I c-can’t...” He managed to blurt out.

“What do you mean you can’t?” He heard you ask, the hint of confusion in your tone aching his heart further. “Spencer, what’s going on?”

The brunette doctor licked his lips and swallowed, tasting the saltiness of his own tears. “Y-you should go Y/N.” He uttered.

“Go? Spencer, you’re not making any sense.” You responded, the door knob rattling under Spencer’s fingers. “Please let me in. I’m not going to say what I want to say through a door.”

“Don’t s-say it at all. You should be with E-Ethan. Your future will be brighter with him.”

Silence. Unbearably heartbreaking silence.

At first you thought your ears were playing tricks on you. There was no way he just said that, right? A week after he told you he loved you. A week after he said he'll always wait for you. A week after he proposed. There was no way he changed his mind.

And then you thought of his time in prison. More specifically the day you went to visit him for the last time. The day you wanted to propose. The day he broke your heart.

He used those exact words - “Your future will be brighter without me.”

Slowly, you placed the palm of your hand on the door between you and took in a deep breath. Your eyes glossed over as the confusion rushing through you evolved into sadness.

Spencer could pinpoint the exact moment the air changed around him. It was suddenly tense. Broken. He felt like a coward. Even if he had your best interest at heart, he should still be able to face you and explain his side in person. Tell you that Ethan came by. Tell you everything that was said. Ask about your plans to leave the BAU. Ask whether he really was the only reason you haven't resigned yet. But he couldn't formulate the words. He simply gave up. A coward.

“Spencer, I-I don’t understand...” You sobbed. “I-I thought-t you loved me.”

“I love you more than anything in this world Y/N.” He quickly replied, the palm of his hand now pressed against the wood. Unbeknown to him, against the exact same spot on the opposite side of the barrier was your hand. So close yet so far.

“Then let me in. Please. I-I came here to say I choose you. I want to be with you Spencer. Please... Please let me in.” You cried through the door. Spencer could hear the pain behind your words, the sorrow. It really took all the strength he had not to let you in.

“I’m sorry Y/N.”

Your hands trembling uncontrollably against the barrier between you and the man of your dreams.

His sudden change of heart left you completely speechless. His words like tiny daggers stabbing directly into your bleeding heart. How did this happen? What changed between now and this morning? What changed between now and last week? You had so many questions. Ones that you feared would remain unanswered.

Additionally, your gut was telling you there was more to this than he was letting on. That it wasn’t as simple as ‘Ethan is the better man for you’ because you knew Spencer didn't believe that. But you couldn't find the strength within to argue with him.

“If-f that’s w-what you want Spencer, I’ll leave-e.”

It was the last thing he heard before the sound of your footsteps ushering away.  

After a minute, the hazel-eyed agent moved to the couch and sunk into the material. Every fibre of his being was currently aching. He hoped he did the right thing, although the voice at the back of his mind said no. What else was he supposed to do? He knew Ethan wouldn't just give up. Was Spencer prepared to fight for you? If tonight was any inclination the answer would also be no.

Spencer’s gaze locked onto the small box in the middle of his coffee table.

It was a considerably good week, and it was supposed to end a hell of a lot better than this.

Every part of me says, "Go ahead" But I got my hopes up again, oh no, not again

-

A/N: i hope you liked this chapter! and i am so so sorry for giving y’all false hope with the last one! i promise these there are happy times ahead for these two just not quite yet... as always i’d love to hear your feedback! if you would like to be added to a taglist, please let me know. thank you for your continuous support. with love, mal. x

masterlist | series masterlist | series playlist

story taglist: @girloncorneliastreet, @haylaansmi, @rexorangecouny, @l0ve-0f-my-life, @obsssedwithjustaboutanything, @aperrywilliams, @sassy-hades, @rainsong01, @reverdevivre, @dracomikaelson, @softieekayy, @lunaofcrows, @andrewhoezierbyrne​, @blameitonthenight21, @lyl-26, @do-yr-research, @nazifa94, @stepsofthefbi, @chatterbug2-0

spencer reid taglist: @no-honey-no, @calm-and-doctor, @idroppedmygourd, @averyhotchner, @wowitsel, @elldell1204, @hey-there-angels, @reidabookforonce, @ellesgreenaway​

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid angst #spencer reid x oc #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #criminal minds fanfiction #dr spencer reid x reader #criminal minds angst #champagne problems series

[shemarmooresfedora]

Rebuilding Family

Summary: Y/N and Spencer were college sweethearts at Cal-Tech but once Spencer got accepted to the FBI Academy, he ended things deciding it was not fair to make Y/N wait for him. When they meet again years later, he discovers something unexpected.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

A/N: i hit 200 followers!! as celebration, i put out a list of 40 prompts and you can send me an ask with up to three and i will write a one-shot including them! i have already received one request and i’m already in the process of writing it but i would love to write more!

Masterlist

Chapter 23

You inhaled sharply as you sat up in the hospital bed. Spencer looked at you, concerned.

“The doctor gave you the option to stay here for one more night. Are you sure you want to be discharged today?” Spencer asked.

“I need to go home. It’s so boring here. I’ll heal quicker at home, I promise,” you whined.

“Scientifically, that’s not possible but fine. Don’t think for a second that I’m going against the doctor’s orders though. Bed rest for a week,” Spencer brushed the stray hairs off your face and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“You’re no fun,” you pouted as he helped you into the wheelchair.

“I think Jo and Penelope have a little surprise for you waiting at home that will cheer you up,” Spencer smiled.

-

Spencer insisted on carrying you bridal-style through the front door because you couldn’t walk up the steps.

“We’re not officially married yet,” you teased.

“Oh hush, I’d keep you in my arms forever if I could,” he pulled you closer to his chest.

You snuggled into his cardigan that smelled like an old bookstore, “I guess I wouldn’t mind that either.”

Spencer slowly put you down and opened the door to your bedroom. Technically, it was you and Spencer’s shared bedroom now because he hardly ever used his bedroom now other than as storage for his things. Most of his clothes had already migrated to your closet and one of your bedside tables now had piles of books, a journal with chicken scratch, and his reading glasses atop it.

Inside, you saw Jo and Penelope holding heart balloons that said “Get Well Soon!” and a big teddy bear.

“Awww, thank you, my lovelies,” you smiled.

“I brought the mini fridge from my office so you are fully stocked with waters, juice, ice cream, fruit, whatever your little heart desires,” Penelope chirped.

“Thank you, Pen. You didn’t have to do that. I feel bad now. Where are you going to put your lunch?”

“Nonsense, my dear! There’s a fridge in the break room I can use. Don’t worry about me,” she assured you.

“And I made you drawings, Mommy,” Jo gestured to the walls of the room covered in colorful crayon sketches of animals, dinosaurs, trees, and people.

“Oh my god, these are so gorgeous, Jo! They are definitely going to help me get better, thank you.”

Jo hopped up on the bed to give you a hug.

“You’re welcome, Mommy,” she said as you planted a kiss on her head.

“Alright, I’m going to head out. Let me know if there’s anything I or anyone else at the BAU can do, literally anything, you just name it,” Penelope stated.

“Bye, Pen. Thank you so much,” you waved.

“Do you want soup? Spring rolls? Tea? What can I do for you, love?” Spencer eagerly asked.

“Could you please see if we have the ingredients for a cake for a special little 7 year-old?” you grinned.

“One cake, coming right up,” Spencer nodded, “Jo, do you want to help or stay with Mommy?”

“Stay with Mommy,” Jo grabbed the TV remote and curled into your side.

“Can you handle it?” you asked hesitantly, knowing baking wasn’t really Spencer’s forte.

“I will try my best,” he smiled, “And if not, I will go to the store.”

-

An hour later, Spencer opened the bedroom door, holding a chocolate cake with purple candles. He looked absolutely adorable, he was wearing your sunflower apron and he had flour residue on his nose.

“As promised,” he smiled, setting the cake down.

Jo was practically drooling as the cake was set in front of her.

“Hold on, I need to get plates and forks!” Spencer rushed out of the room and down the stairs.

“You better hurry. Jo looks like she is ready to just start eating it with her hands,” you laughed.

-

A week later, you woke up super early and jumped out of bed, dancing around a little in Spencer’s sweater, your PJ shorts, and fuzzy socks.

“Bed rest is over!” you cheered quietly to yourself, going downstairs to make banana bread.

Spencer came down fifteen minutes later as you were dancing around the kitchen to your music and whisking the batter.

“Bed rest is over,” you beamed as he came up behind you, tucking his chin into your neck and squeezing you softly, leaving a kiss as he pulled away.

“I love you,” he grinned.

“And I love you too...Spence, I was thinking…” you turned to face him after you put the pan in the oven.

“About what?” he asked, leaning against the kitchen counter with his mug of coffee.

“I don’t want to wait any longer. Can we please get married already?” you asked.

“Like now now?” he smiled softly.

“Like as soon as we can but still having a small ceremony so our friends and family don’t kill us for eloping,” you placed your hands on his chest.

“JJ and Will had their wedding in Rossi’s backyard,” Spencer suggested.

“Penelope did say if we needed anything, just ask,” you grinned.

Spencer already had his phone out of his pocket before you could say anything else. He dialed Rossi and put it on speaker.

“Reid, to what do I owe this pleasure on a lovely Tuesday morning,” Rossi spoke through the phone.

“Hey, Rossi. Y/N and I kind of have a big favor to ask,” Spencer began.

“Name it.”

-

Everything was a whirlwind after that. You decided Saturday evening would be best for the wedding so you and Spencer had exactly five days to coordinate your wedding.

Luckily, the team took care of most of the planning like the caterer and the set-up of Rossi’s backyard but you and Spencer’s opinions were still needed for everything from which flowers you wanted in your bouquet to what flavor of cake.

You and Spencer sat in bed one night criss-cross across from each other and you each had a little journal and pen in your hand. You both wrote your vows over the next hour. Spencer would occasionally look up at you, stare for a minute, silently smiling, and then continue jotting something down.

Spencer pushed up his glasses on the bridge of his nose and leaned over your journal.

“No peeking!” you rolled on your back, flailing your legs so he couldn’t get to your journal.

“Ugh fine, I surrender,” he laughed, grabbing on to your legs to stop your movements, “I guess I can wait 3 more days.”

He leaned down to kiss you.

“3 more days,” you repeated with a dreamy smile.

-

You and Jo met the BAU ladies at a boutique to get dresses for everyone. You had decided on a dusty blue for the bridesmaid dress color but you let them choose which style they wanted so everyone was matching but still got to decide which dress they liked best.

Jo was essentially given free rein in the children’s section of the store and chose a pale pink dress with a bow on the back that would serve as her flower girl dress.

After all that was settled, everyone gathered on the couch near the fitting room to watch you try on dresses, you had been saying from the start that you just wanted something simple. All the options in the store were overwhelming to you but the girls insisted you at least try on a little of everything to get a feel for it.

You came out in a huge poofy wedding dress courtesy of Penelope.

Jo burst out in giggles, “Mommy looks like a cupcake.”

“I think anything overly poofy is ruled out. I want to be able to pee without the help of 3 bridesmaids,” you walked back into the fitting room.

Next was a gown with lots of detailed beading and lace and a long train.

“I think it’s too much,” you sighed, “Plus, I don’t want to trip on this train while walking down the aisle,” you returned to the stall.

You walked out of the dressing room once more and everyone gasped.

“Oh my god,” Penelope was fanning her face to dry the fast-forming tears.

“Y/N, I don’t want to speak for you but I think this is the one,” JJ smiled.

The dress you were wearing was a white satin gown. It was a maxi dress with spaghetti straps and it hugged your hips but was loose around your legs so it was still comfortable.

“It’s perfect,” you smiled softly, looking in the mirror.

Jo hopped off of Emily’s lap and joined you on the little stage, still in her flower girl dress, doing a little twirl. You started to cry from all the happiness and pent-up excitement you were feeling.

-

“Hey, how’d it go?” Spencer asked when you got home.

You rounded the corner to the couch where he was laying.

“That good?” he asked.

“What?” you furrowed your brow, looking at him in confusion because you hadn’t said anything yet.

“You have remnants of mascara on your cheeks indicating that you were crying and that means you must have found the perfect dress because Jo is over there grinning like a fool,” Spencer smiled.

“You know you’re a retired profiler, right?” you teased.

“Mommy looked so pretty, Daddy! You wouldn’t even believe it!” Jo exclaimed.

“Oh, I believe it, Princess,” Spencer lifted Jo up on to his lap, “I know it’s against the rules for me to see Mommy’s dress but can you do a fashion show for me with yours?”

Jo nodded enthusiastically, running up to her room with the bag in her hand.

“Ready!” she called out a few minutes later.

“Now introducing your royal highness, Princess Josephine Y/L/N-Reid,” Spencer announced as Jo walked down the stairs, doing a fancy royal wave.

A/N: i absolutely can not wait to write the wedding chapter

#spencer reid fluff #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x reader #dad!spencer #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid #reid x reader #spencer x reader #cm fanfic #criminal minds

[jpegjade]

Hot Coco (Part 2) - Spencer

random but i finished hot coco part 2 while procrastinating a paper!!! 

warnings: talks about medication and a panic attack but that’s it. 

genre: fluff. a little angsty 

word count: hella. 

Hot coco part 1 - Here

enjoy!

*****

“I hate this.” You muttered, bouncing your leg.

The anxiety filling the air, you noticed every detail about the room and it made you nervous. The little girl across from you wouldn’t stop staring and her mom didn’t do anything to tell her that staring was rude. She also wouldn’t keep still, swinging her legs back and forth while yours bounced. The pictures on the walls were all a little bit crooked. You didn’t like that. You wanted to fix it. Why was it bothering you so much? Everything seemed to bother you these days, even when Spencer was home.

“You’re biting your lip and bouncing your leg. You’ve been staring at that little girl the whole time we’ve been here and you keep fidgeting with the rips in your jeans. You’re anxious about something. What’s up?” Spencer said, half whispering into your ear, trying not to disturb the quiet in the waiting room.

The waiting room wasn’t that big. It was just wide enough to fit the 6 people waiting in the room, plus you and Spencer, but not with enough breathing room. You felt suffocated in that room.

“I don’t like doctors. I especially don’t like the ones that will just tell me something’s wrong with me and classify me as something. I’m not something. I’m a goddamn person.” You angrily half whispered back. You were a little louder than Spencer so the mom of the little girl shot you beady eyes as if you cared. You had the extreme urge to flip her off and Spencer noticed your hand twitching so he grabbed it, interlacing his fingers between them.

“You can’t tell children to go fuck themselves.” Spencer whispered, grinning. “Imagine if it was the girls.”

You paused for a second, thinking about your daughters. The funniest part was that they had seen you get angry at Spencer, even if he didn’t get angry, and you screamed ‘Fuck you’ at him when he barely responded.

“Y/n Reid.” The nurse called out.

You and Spencer stood up together, walking towards the open door, following the nurse. You got your basic vitals taken, weight and blood pressure. You weren’t excited about your weight, and Spencer saw it in your face so he said your weight was “so many pounds of love for only him.” You smiled at his cheesiness, following the nurse into the psychiatrist’s office. The office was different than going to a general doctor. There was no bed for you to recline on, there were only two seats in front of a desk.

The psychiatrist was a nice enough older lady who spent her time trying to get your back story, understand your history, know more about your experiences with anxiety and stress. She just talked to you like a normal human being, not like a patient. She even laughed at some of your jokes, depending on which one you cracked. All of them were about how much you loved your husband and how outgoing your daughters were.

“Do you often have panic attacks and the medication you have doesn’t work?” She asked, scribbling on the paper.

“What medication?” You asked, wondering what you were missing out on.

“She doesn’t take medication.” Spencer said, noticing that your leg was bouncing again. It wasn’t bouncing a moment before. He put his hand on your leg and gently moved his thumb to help calm you.

“Well I’m going to give you something for the day to day anxiety and something for the panic attacks. I’ll see you in two weeks to check in, alright?” The doctor said, handing over some samples and a piece of blue paper with her handwriting on it.

Saying your goodbyes and scheduling the next appointment was a daze to you so Spencer handled it. He was used to making appointments for his mom so long ago that he already knew how things went.

The car ride home was just as frustrating as the appointment so you sat there, arms crossed, staring out into the distance. You barely registered when the two of you pulled into the driveway, parking next to Penelope’s car. Spencer turned off the engine and looked ahead while you looked out your window.

“I used to hate driving.” He said, chuckling.

“Spencer, you still hate driving.” You scrunched up your face.

“That's true. But I hate my girls not being able to get around properly, especially when my favorite girl isn’t feeling her best.” Spencer said, reaching over for your hand.

You uncrossed your arms and let Spencer hold your hand. You felt some of your anger melt away.

“Spencer, I’m broken. How am I supposed to be a good mom to the girls with these?” You shook the sample pill bottles.

“Pills don’t make you any less of a good mom. They don't make you any less of a good wife or less of a person. Honey, you just need some extra help staying regulated and calm.” Spencer kissed your hand and held it to his cheek, flashing those big puppy eyes at you.

“It’s just something else I can’t do by myself…” You said, sighing.

Tears began to prickle your eyes when you felt Spencer put his head in the crook of your neck, resting on your shoulder. His hair was fluffy on your cheek as a tear slipped and you smiled at the feeling. It must not have been comfortable to stretch his torso over the middle console but he still made the effort anyway.

“You know that having to take medication doesn’t define you, right? Needing chemical assistance isn’t a bad thing. It just means you have a need and that’s how you fill the need when I can’t be there. And when I can be there. And when the girls can be there. And when we all can be together, drinking hot chocolate and watching kids movies together.” Spencer lifted his head to kiss you on the cheek.

“That’s easy for you to say.” You sighed, wiping a tear away.

You didn’t know why this was really so frustrating to you but you knew that this was the last thing you wanted. You knew it was hard for Spencer to watch you need medication because it made him think about his mom. You didn't like the moments when you reminded him of his mom because he should only have to worry about his mom and his kids. He shouldn’t have to worry about his wife.

“Let’s go in and get some ice cream. I think you need some ice cream.” Spencer kissed your cheek again before he grabbed the bag of samples and got out of the car.

You watched as he shuffled around to your side of the car, opening the door for you. You wiped away your last tear and stepped out of the car with a deep breath. Spencer pulled you into a calming hug as soon as he closed the door, wrapping his arms around you.

“The girls are so proud of you for getting help.” Spencer said, squeezing you a little bit.

You smiled into his chest knowing he was just  saying that to make you feel better since the girls wouldn’t completely understand the full weight of what it meant to you. Honestly, all you wanted in that moment was a nap.

Spencer let you go, kissed your forehead, and grabbed your hand as the two of you walked up to the front door. As the two of you put the keys in, you heard sounds of screaming, which alerted the two of you.

Penelope was watching the girls so the fact that they were screaming wasn’t a good sign. Spencer quickly unlocked the front door, pushing it open and racing to the living room to find Penelope and the girls screaming in laughter over Halloweentown 2. A big sigh was released between the two of you before the girls noticed that you were home.

Penelope was the first to get up, carefully stepping over the action figures and dolls strewn throughout the floor, arms wide open to hug the two of you. The girls quickly followed behind, Spencer picking them up, and they stretched their little arms as big as possible to reach between their parents and Penelope.

“Did you girls have fun?” You asked as Spencer put the girls down on the floor.

“We did!” Chloe cheered, jumping up and down. She was always more excited than her sister.

"They did!" Penelope said, smiling as she walked over to get her bag.

You offered to pay her with the extra cash you took out of the ATM for her but she refused with every part of her being.

"I did it because I love my little god-daughters." She said, waving at everyone as she closed the door behind her.

You were absolutely exhausted, tired of everything, and a little depressed. You went to your room to lay down while you heard Spencer talking to the girls.

"Okay, loves of my life. It's time to clean up." There was rustling but you didn't really hear anyone move.

In a not so hushed tone, Chloe and Alexandria both asked, "What about mommy? Is she okay?"

There was quiet as you waited for Spencer to figure out how to explain everything to the girls.

"Mommy's going through a hard time right now." Spencer started.

There was more rustling.

"Why?" Alexandria asked. She was always the one to ask questions.

"There's no reason. She didn't do anything wrong. But her brain isn't very happy with life right now so we're going to be very quiet and put everything away and I'll get you girls a snack while you finish the movie." Spencer said.

After you heard giggles that brought a smile to your face, you thought about how badly you wanted to be in the room with the girls and Spencer. But then the feelings of isolation came back. The fear of ruining everything by just being in there with them, their watchful stare as they worried about you. Spencer not seeing you as the person he married...

Before you knew it, you were back in the corner of the room, trying to catch your breath. You curled up as much as possible, facing the wall in front of you as the tears streamed down your face. Thoughts came rushing back to you: Spencer taking the girls and leaving; the girls growing up hating you for not being able to care for them; Spencer leaving you alone with the girls; Spencer...

"Hey, babe? I brought apple slices and..." Spencer looked up from his plate of apple slices he arranged into a smiley face and saw that you weren't in the bed anymore.

Looking around the room, he heard sniffles, the signs of quiet crying, and mumbling. Putting the apple slices on the bed, he found you on the other side of the room, rocking, back facing him.

"Y/n... Are you okay?" Spencer asked.

He knew you weren't okay, not in the slightest, but he wanted to let you know he was in the room and he cared. Meanwhile, your mumbling continued, the labored breathing as you tried and failed to regulate it.

Spencer heard the girls giggling in the living room and was glad that they had their movie and their snacks as he closed the door. They were already worried about you. They shouldn't have to worry more right now.

"I can't..." You kept repeating, over and over again.

You were so far out of it that Spencer didn't think you registered him sitting about a foot away from you as you cried heavily.

"Princess, what can't you do?" Spencer sat with his legs criss-crossed, facing you.

He wanted to badly just to hold you but he didn't want to send you into shock or make anything worse. He still had the pill samples in his pocket and he needed to convince you to take one but he was racking his brain as to how...

"I can't... I can't..." You kept repeating, you head growing light headed. The room was hot and spinning...

"Y/n, please talk to me? It's Spencer. It's just the two of us." Spencer watched as you looked over at him, a hint of recognition in your face.

"Spencer... I can't do this." You said, tears streaming freely now.

"Do what, my love?" Spencer did a small scoot towards you now that you acknowledged him but he didn't touch you. He just got a little bit closer.

"I can't... Anything. I'm not like you. I'm not strong. I'm alone. I'm scared. I can't do any of it." You said, not even bothering to wipe your cheeks of the drying tears because more would just fall.

"You can do this. You aren't alone, I'm here. I got time off from Hotch and we can go on a trip. We can do something different while we get you settled, balanced." Spencer smiled a little, just to give you some ounce of hope, but you weren't going for it.

"Spencer, I can't function... Not like I used to. Not like before..." You burst into a fresh set of tears.

You didn't want it to seem like you were blaming the girls. It wasn't their fault. But you knew things were different than when it was just you and Spencer together. Alone together.

"The girls were a big life change..." Spencer said, already knowing.

He always knew...

"I'm sorry. It's not their fault and it's not yours. It's..." You were about to blame yourself, halfheartedly.

"It's not yours either." Spencer always knew.

You were shaking and all you wanted was to breathe again. Stop crying. Go out and hang out with the joys of your life, all three of them.

"Princess, come here?" Spencer opened his arms and you climbed into his lap.

Whenever you were ready to be touched, Spencer was there with open arms. He knew that you would have said no if you weren't ready. He held onto you softly, not too much pressure. He made sure you could see everything in front of you so you didn't feel closed in. He even had a small bottle of water from the bedside table on the floor with him.

"Spence, I'm a failure..." You said, almost at a whisper.

"You're not a failure. You just need help." Spencer pulled out the little capsule and opened the bottle of water for you.

You stared at it blankly before grabbing it in your hand. Spencer nudged the water bottle a little closer to you and you sighed, taking it in your hand before swallowing it.

"It's supposed to make me sleepy..." You said, sighing again.

"Let's climb into bed and I can hold you until you wake up. Or until the girls start burning the house down. I think that would be grounds for letting go of you to put the fire out." Spencer smiled, kissing the top of your forehead.

You weren't able to walk to the bed on your own so he held you as much as he could as you both climbed in and got comfortable. Spencer noticed you were still shaking even though you were calming down slowly. He knew part of it was because you were cold again and the other part was because you were so emotionally drained from the process.

Spencer put on his 'y/n's bad day' playlist that he made for you on that app you convinced him to get. You know, the music one. The two of you make collaborative playlists to keep each other going through the days when he was away from home. Since the last time you listened to it, Spencer added a couple new songs that you hadn't heard before but you decided you liked. Slowly, your blinking grew longer and your body grew heavier.

"What about a road trip?" Spencer said, thinking.

"Hmm?" You hummed, deciding to just let your eyes close and listen to his heartbeat.

"A road trip. We can go somewhere... Away from here for a little while. Let my girls see something different." Spencer kissed the top of your head as he felt you growing more relaxed. Your grip around his waist was getting looser.

"I think the girls would like that..." Your voice was very soft at this point and Spencer was a little less tense knowing that the medication was helping.

"What about you? You're my girl too." Spencer smiled and nuzzled the top of your head.

"I'm happy whenever I'm with you, wherever we are." You drifted off to sleep with a little snore that Spencer found so cute.

"I love you so much..." Spencer said, yawning.

As if on cue, there was a tiny knock at the door, followed by two heads peaking out from around the now-open door.

"Daddy? Can we lay down with you and mommy?" Alexandria asked as she and Chloe tiptoed towards the end of the bed.

Spencer lifted his head to make sure you were still sleeping before quietly nodding.

The girls climbed into bed on Spencer's side, getting cozy in his free arm. Soon, all of his girls were sound asleep and all he could do was think about how lucky he was to have you. Through all of the darkness he lived in for so long, now he had you and the girls.

#dad!spencer #spencer reid #spencer x reader #spencer reid angst #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid imagine

[prettyboyreid]

i love you most

After a particularly rough case, Spencer wonders if it’s time for him to step down from the Behavioral Analysis Unit.

Spencer Reid x Reader

Warnings: violence against children (nothing too graphic), out of order plot lines

Word Count: 4,116

I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the photos Garcia displayed on the screen, shifting uncomfortably in my seat as she gave us all of the information that the detectives had sent to her.  Three kids, all little boys, had been found in local parks in Oklahoma City, posed on the swings.  They hadn’t been reported missing, so they had to assume they were taken in the middle of the night.

“How old were the boys?” Rossi asked, doing his best to keep his attention away from the pictures provided for them.

“Uh, all of them had turned four in the past two months,” Penelope answered, thankful she could face away from the screen as she gave them all the information they needed.  I chewed on the inside of my cheek, rifling through the file I’d been given when I stepped in the door of the round table room.

“They were all taken a few days apart.  We can’t waste any time with this; wheels up in thirty,” Hotch announced, folding his own file up before exiting the room quickly, moving in the direction of his office.  I could tell he wasn’t entirely prepared for this case - none of us were.  He had a young son at home, JJ had two, and Morgan had one on the way.  This case was hitting close to home, and I could tell we all couldn’t help but think what if it was one of them?

We all sat at the table in silence for a moment, Garcia turning off the screen so we didn’t have to look at the pictures longer than we needed to.  None of us moved for a solid two minutes, preparing ourselves for what we’ll have to face through the next few days. 

JJ was the first to get up and leave the room.  She wiped at her cheeks with the pads of her thumb as she made her way down to the bullpen.  Morgan followed next, then Rossi and Emily.  Garcia and I sat in the room for a moment, her hand resting heavily on my shoulder as she passed me to go back to her tech room.

I pulled the phone out of my pocket and dialed a number that was committed to my memory, holding it to my ear before standing up from my seat.  It only rang twice before my favorite voice answered. 

“Spence?  What’s up?”  she asked in a somewhat worried tone.  I usually didn’t call her in the middle of the day, and the last time she got a call around this hour, I had gotten shot in the knee. 

I couldn’t really blame her for being nervous.

“Hey, uh, I just wanted to tell you we got a case… it’s in Oklahoma,”  I explained to her, leaning against the large wooden table as I spoke.  Having known her as long as I have, I could tell she was frowning at the news.  She always did whenever I had to go away on a case. 

“Do you think it’ll take you very long?  Should I move our trip down to Ocean City from this weekend to next week or something?”  I could hear the disappointment in her voice.  She’d been looking forward to this trip for months, especially since I technically was supposed to be on one of my mandated leaves for the next thirty days starting Friday. 

“No, no, I should be home before then.  I’ll keep you updated, alright?”  I assured her, folding my free arm across my chest before glancing up at the clock on the wall.

“Okay,”  she sighed out, clearly out of relief.  “Be safe.  I love you.”  I still got butterflies every time I heard her say those three simple words. 

“I will.  I love you more,”  I reminded her with a grin, hanging up the phone before sliding it into my back pocket.  I made my way down to my desk and grabbed my go-bag, heading towards the elevator with the rest of the team so we could head to the jet.

-

Morgan and I were instructed to go to the latest crime scene.  On the jet, Penelope called us to tell us that a new body had been discovered that morning.  I volunteered to go, just so no one else would have to.  Derek, of course, wanted to come with me.  Not exactly in a protective way, but just to make sure I was alright.  It was an intense case, and he knew I had breaking points just like everyone else.  He didn’t want me to reach that point, not in front of a bunch of detectives or grieving parents.

The scene was enough to make Morgan lose his breakfast.  He heaved over a trash can in the park, and all I could do was pat his back comfortingly.  His forehead was glistening with sweat in the midday sun of Oklahoma, which he wiped at with his wrist once he stood up again. 

“You alright?” I asked cautiously, retreating my hands to the pockets of my black slacks.  I glanced between him and the crime scene that had been taped off, noticing how none of the officers or detectives would get within twenty feet of the swingset unless they had to.

“I will be, once we catch whoever the hell’s doing this,” he said, clearing his throat before approaching the scene as if nothing had happened.  I followed quickly behind him, cautious as we made our way closer to the playground. 

There was a bruise in the shape of a comparatively large hand around his small neck, his hands taped down to the chains of the swing with clear packing tape.  His head rested against his right hand, his eyes left open and fixated on the open, barren playground in front of him. 

I could understand how Morgan got sick after one glance.  If I had eaten more than a granola bar and a cup of coffee for breakfast, I probably would’ve done the same. 

“He was just a kid,” I heard my partner remind the two of us in a hushed voice next to me, walking around the swing to try and get a better understanding of the crime scene.  The longer we stared at it, the worse it seemed to get.  From adhesive residue from tape or glue around his mouth to red friction marks around his wrists.  Just looking at it felt like a knife twisting in my stomach. 

It got harder and harder to focus on the task at hand, so Morgan and I stepped away and back towards the SUV we had driven here. 

“How could anyone do that to a kid?”  I asked no one in particular, my hand resting on the black door handle as I glanced back towards the swings again.  I was trying to picture some happy moments families would have shared there, trying to turn this into something that wasn’t so grim and gut-wrenching. 

It wasn’t working very well.

“That’s what we’re gonna find out, Reid,” Morgan reassured me, looking over at me from the top of the vehicle before stepping in.  I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the sight, a feeling of homesickness washing over me suddenly.  I let out a heavy sigh before joining him, pulling the seat belt over my chest before sinking back into the black leather seats. 

We sat in silence for a while, watching as the detectives and the local Crime Scene Unit collected the last of the evidence they needed, trying to analyze the scene as much as we could from our seats.  

“When you found out about Savannah being pregnant,” I started, turning my attention over to the man sitting next to me.  He turned to face me as well, intrigued by the way I had chosen to start my sentence.  “Did you consider leaving all of this?  The FBI?”  I asked, chewing on the inside of my cheek.  He looked ahead after I finished, clearly pondering over the heavy question.

“Yeah, I did,” he answered honestly, still watching as the Crime Scene Unit put the rest of the evidence in the back of a black van.  “But I never thought I really would until today,” he finished, putting the car in reverse before pulling out of the parking spot. 

-

It had been two days.  Two long, gruesome days that I wished would have given us answers.  

But we came up with nothing. 

We interviewed the parents of all four boys, went to their preschools and daycare centers, even Mommy and Me groups that they used to go to.  

Still nothing.  

It wasn’t just my team that was getting impatient; the Oklahoma City Police Department seemed to get more and more aggravated every day.  I couldn’t say I blamed them. 

“We might have something,” Jennifer said as she came into the room, a thin file in her hand.  She opened it up once she was at the head of the table the rest of us were sitting at, pulling out a picture of a woman and a paper that looked similar to a background check Garcia would run. 

“This is Miranda Laughlin.  She’s twenty-eight years old, and she ran a nursery all of the boys went to when they were infants.  The funding for the nursery fell through before the boys were eighteen months, and closed down soon after,” she explained, shoving the file into the middle of the long table before leaning against it. 

“Why do you think she has anything to do with this?” I asked, taking the picture and looking at it.  She had looked oddly familiar, but not enough to resonate with me.

“She had a son, Grayson.  He was the same age as the boys, and he’s the reason she opened up the nursery in the first place.  Three months ago, when her husband was driving him back from a play date, they were in a car crash.  The son was choked by the seat belt and died when paramedics couldn’t reach him,” she told them, a grimace apparent on her face as she had to explain to them what happened.  “His birthday was the day before the first boy was found.”

“That’s one hell of a stressor,” Rossi said, looking over the background check before looking up at the rest of the team.  Everyone else pushed out of their seats almost immediately, heading for the door.  I was about to follow suit, before Hotch stopped me. 

“Are you up for this?” he asked, his voice sounding somehow more serious than it usually was.  “I know you were at the crime scenes, and I don’t want you to do something in the field that you’ll regret,” he told me, but I nodded softly. 

“I want to be there to arrest her.  I want to make sure she pays for this,” I told him, pushing past him before following the rest of the team out to the SUVs.  

I took a Kevlar vest from Emily before strapping it on, making sure we all had everything before I got in the back seat.  I pulled my seat belt on and locked in place, glancing up for a brief moment as the car lurched out of its parking spot quickly and headed down towards the Laughlin house.

- 

The jet ride home was silent.  You could barely even hear anyone breathing.  It gave me an uneasy feeling - the loudest people I know being more than quiet, but I wouldn’t want it to be any other way right now. 

I had texted my wife that we were on our way home, and I could tell how excited she was that I’d be home for vacation.  I couldn’t wait to get home, not just for vacation, but just to hold her tightly and remind her how much I had missed her. 

We seemed to land back in DC quicker than we had arrived in Oklahoma, and despite voicing the fact about the way the tailwinds work in our favor, I just stayed quiet, just like everyone else.  

We went to the sixth floor of the FBI building, gathering up anything we would have left behind before we all filed out, one by one.  Some people took the stairs, some the elevators.  We just needed to be alone, or we needed something we couldn’t receive from the other members of our team. 

I took the stairs.  I held the brown leather satchel close to my body as I descended six flights of stairs, relishing in the silence and the echo of my shoes hitting the concrete floors.  The door to the lobby seemed heavier than usual, like it carried the weight of everything we worked on in a simple eighty inch by thirty-six inch slab of metal.  

Nonetheless, I made my way through the barren lobby and out to the parking lot.  I made a beeline for my car before getting in the driver’s seat, tossing my go bag and satchel into the passenger seat before pulling out of the nearly empty parking lot.

It wasn’t a long drive back to our house - twenty minutes, tops.  But tonight, the road seemed to stretch out miles and miles more than they should.  Time seemed to slow down, as if I had driven back home from Oklahoma.  I relished in the quiet, the whipping of the wind beneath the tires in my car and the soft zoom that I’d hear every now and then when a car passed by me.  When I finally pulled into the driveway of the white house with vines climbing up the sides, I noticed the light from the living room was still on.  I quickly checked the time on my watch as I grabbed my things. 

8:26.

They should still be awake.

I couldn’t help but smile at the thought, locking the car doors behind me once I had gathered all of my belongings.  I practically sprinted up the front steps to unlock the door, setting my bags down the second I made it past the threshold and saw practically the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. 

Y/N was sitting on the couch, with our son Ethan tucked under her arm, sucking on his thumb as he was entranced in the cartoons displayed on the television.  His head snapped up the moment he heard the bags drop, a bright smile displayed on his face as he wriggled out of his mother's grasp. 

“Daddy!  You’re home!”  he exclaimed, the soft patter of his sock-covered feet drowning my ears as he ran up to me with his arms open wide.  I crouched down so I could be at his height, picking him up the second his arms wrapped around my neck.  I held him close to me, holding his curly-haired head in my large palm as I stood up. 

“I missed you so much, bug,” I breathed out to him, smiling as I felt his face nuzzle into the crook of my neck, his head resting on my shoulder. 

“I missed you too!  Mommy said you would be home tonight, so I wanted to stay up with her,” Ethan explained to me, pulling away slightly so he could look up at me as he talked.  I chuckled softly as I listened to his little rambling, moving my hand from his head to his back to keep him from leaning back too far.

“Is that so?” I said with a grin, looking over at Y/N as she stood up from her seat on the couch.  Our son nodded his head ferociously, his eyes squeezing shut as he did so.  “I bet you’re super tired then, huh?” I asked, pushing some of his bouncing curls out of his face.  

Even though I had a picture of him in my wallet and at least a hundred pictures of him on my phone, nothing would ever compare to his blazing brown eyes and amber curls being right in front of me. 

“Nope, I took an extra nap with mommy today so we could have ice cream when you got home,” he told me, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. 

I couldn’t help but laugh, nodding softly at his answer before kissing the top of his head.  “How about you go wait in your chair at the island, and I’ll be there in a minute, okay?” I told him, and he nodded quickly, letting me set him down before he ran into the kitchen. 

I faced Y/N for the first time in much too long, smiling almost lazily as she wrapped her arms around my neck.  My hands instinctively held onto her hips, kissing her softly with a wide grin.  I held her against me for a moment, having missed everything about her for nearly four days.  It physically pained me to be away from my family for that long, but it always made the time I spent home so much more valuable. 

“Rough case?” she asked, pulling away from me, her hands falling down to my own before lacing them together.  I nodded softly, my nose scrunching up a bit at the thought.  

“It was kids… all of them the same age as Ethan,” I told her softly, worried that he might overhear despite being a room away.  I hated letting him hear me talk about work, and tried to keep the cases away from him as much as possible. 

She just nodded softly, pushing some of my hair out of my face as she gave me a sympathetic smile.  “Go spend time with your son.  I’ll tidy all of this up,” she promised, leaning up on the tips of her toes before pressing a soft kiss to my nose.  I thanked her softly and gave her a small smile, heading into the kitchen where I saw Ethan waiting patiently, his feet swinging excitedly beneath the stool.  My smile only grew at the sight of him, ruffling his hair up slightly before opening the freezer. 

“How does moose tracks sound?” I asked, pulling it out before waiting for an answer.  It was his favorite ice cream, and he could never say no to it.  I turned around to see him nodding quickly with a bright toothy smile, folding his hands together in his lap as he waited excitedly.

I spent another good hour, at least, sitting at the kitchen island, just eating our bowls of ice cream while Ethan caught  me up on everything I had missed in the past few days.  So far, he had made three new friends, made a lot of crafts with his mom, and watched Star Trek with his mom (“Because I missed you, Daddy.”)  It made my heart wrench at the thought of missing so much, even though, in reality, it wasn’t relatively that much. 

Once I got him cleaned up and had the dishes in the sink, he seemed tuckered out and about to pass out against my leg he was leaning against.  I bent down to pick him up, carefully resting his head on my chest as I carried him through the living room and up the stairs to his room.  I didn’t need to flick on the light, considering the little night light on the other side of the room and the fact I probably knew this room better than the back of my hand.  I pulled back the light sheets that had a solar system patterned across the soft fabric, carefully placing him down in the bed before tucking him in.  

He let his eyes open to meet mine lazily, smiling as he saw me next to him.  “You’re coming on the trip with us tomorrow, right?” he asked me, his voice tired and quiet as he spoke.  I nodded softly at his question, pushing his hair out of his eyes as I gave him a small smile.  

“Yeah, I am.  I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” I promised him, leaning down before pressing a soft kiss to his head.  “G’night, bug.  I love you,” I told him, smiling as he blew a kiss to me, making sure to make a big mwah sound as he did. 

“Goodnight, daddy.  I love you more,” he said, curling up against his pillow and tucking his stuffed teddy bear under his arm. 

“And I love you most,” I added, smiling down at him as I slowly got up, heading to the door and closing it once I was out of the room.  I let out a heavy sigh, noticing that the hall light was off.  I headed down to the master bedroom, tugging off my tie and the expensive belt that rested on my hips.  

I pushed open the door, smiling as I saw Y/N laying on the bed, wearing one of my older button-up shirts and a pair of athletic shorts.  I tossed my clothes into a hamper in the corner of the room, grabbing a pair of basketball shorts from a set of drawers adjacent from our bed before tossing them on and joining her in the large bed. 

She immediately set her phone down and flicked off the lamp on her bedside table, curling up next to me and wrapping her arms around my torso.  I chuckled softly as she rested her head on my chest, pressing a kiss to the top of her head as I sank down into my spot in the mattress. 

We just laid quietly for a few moments, just drinking in the time we had together alone for the first time in too long.  My mind began racing with different thoughts, thinking back to everything Ethan had told me while we ate our late night snack together, and back to the case I dreadfully had to work. 

“What would you think about me stepping down from the BAU?”  I thought aloud, my eyes fixated on the patterns in the paint on the ceiling above us.  I felt her looking up at me, though, knowing it wasn’t what she was expecting to hear from me. 

She stayed silent for a little while longer, the gears turning in her head as she tried to think of a proper response.  I knew she had wanted me to quit, especially when Ethan was born, but she also knew it was one of the things I loved most in the world, behind the two of them.  I’d told her many times before that I feel this is what I was made for, but to think that I was missing out on so much made me hate it more and more each day.

“I think only you can decide that, Spence.  You know how I feel about it, but it’s your job.  It’s been your job for over fifteen years.  I can’t ask you to step down from it if you’re going to be unhappy,” she told me, her fingers trailing different miscellaneous shapes across my chest.  I nodded softly as I listened to her, wrapping an arm around her to hold her as close to me as possible. 

“What if I just went to teach at the academy?  They always need new teachers, and one that was from the BAU would be-”

“Spence,” she cut me off, knowing my ramblings could go on much longer than necessary.  “While I would love to talk about this, you need to sleep.  I know you haven’t had a good night’s sleep since you left, and we have thirty days until you have to go back to work, plus a three hour car ride tomorrow,” she explained, leaning up and pressing a soft kiss to my lips.  “I pinky promise, we’ll talk about it.  But right now, you need to sleep, okay?” 

I couldn’t help but smile as she babied me slightly, chucking before nodding softly, pulling the heavy duvet over the two of us.  “If you insist,” I grinned, letting my free hand rest around her as well.  I pressed my lips to her shoulder, despite them being covered by the familiar fabric of my old dress shirt. 

“Good night, angel.  I love you.”

“Good night, Spence.  I love you more,” she said, her hands combing back through my hair tiredly, doing her best to lull me to sleep.  

“I love you most,” I murmured wearily, holding her body as close to mine as I felt my eyes and mind becoming heavier and heavier, smiling to myself as the last conscious thought I had was how lucky I was, lucky to have a wife like her, a son like Ethan… how lucky I was to have people that cared about me.  

God knows I never thought I would.

tags: @danielleslegacy​

#spencer reid #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #dad!spencer #dr spencer reid #spencer reid gifs #spencer reid gif #dr spencer reid fic #dr spencer reid fanfiction #dr spencer reid x reader #dr spencer reid x you #dr spencer reid x y/n #dr spencer reid gif #dr spencer reid gifs #dr reid #dr reid fic #dr reid fanfiction #dr reid x you #dr reid x reader #dr reid x y/n #dad!spencer reid #dad!dr spencer reid #dad!dr reid #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds gif

[aficwhore]

As I Lay Dying...(Part One)

Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader, Team x Reader

Warnings: violence, language, near death experience, reader injury, slight fluff

Word Count: 2,655

Summary: After having a dry spell the team go on a case, the unsub is kidnapping and killing women around the reader’s age and appearance. As she goes undercover the plan falls through, will she survive? (slow burn, sort of?)

A/N: So I wrote the first half of this and it was super long, like way too long, so I decided to split this into parts! Please let me know if you liked it and if I should post the last parts as well! Feedback please!!!! <3

Reader POV:

My neck started to strain as I intensely stared at my computer screen. Deciding to take a break from my paperwork and reports, I shove my chair back with a huff.

“Anyone else need more coffee?” I asked as I made my way from the bullpen to our small kitchenette, earning a few no’s and hums from the team.

I rinsed my mug of my coffee leftovers. I reached to pull the fresh brewed coffee pot, pouring most of it into my cup and adding a small dash of creamer and sugar. as I leaned against the counter, sipping my caffeine, Penelope struts in, “Hey baby cakes!”

“Hey,” I smile sheepishly, taking another swig of my drink.

“What’s with the gloomy energy? Did something happen, love?” The blonde questioned sincerely.

I shrugged, “We haven’t had a case in a while, not that it’s a bad thing, but I’m sick of sitting and staring at a screen all day.” I explained as I pulled myself up onto the counter.

She laughed, “Darlin’ I do that everyday! But u know you’re not used to it, so i hope you get a case soon, wait, no-“

We both burst into giggles, knowing what she meant. “Woah what’s so funny in here?!” Emily inquired, while stepping into the room.

“Pen here just said how she HOPES we get a case soon.” I chuckled.

“Oh god, i hate to say it, but me - fucking - too.” Emily chimed in. She walked over, taking the last of coffee into her cup, leaving it black. “Y/n, you better get back to your desk before Mr. Boss Man sees you goofing around,” she smirked, leaving Penelope and I alone again.

I rolled my eyes as I slid off the countertop. “Well thanks for the horrible wish Garcia,” I snickered, nudging her side as I passed by, heading to my dreaded workspace. I walked by Spencer’s desk, he leaned back in his chair, feet propped up. I took the opportunity to smack the back of his head lightly earning a quiet yelp from the genius.

“What was that for?!” Boy wonder squealed. I shrugged hearing Morgan snicker. With a loud sigh, I threw myself in my rolling chair, causing it to spin me around. Already stricken with boredom I started bouncing my leg, leading to my chair to start squeaking. I ignored the noise, struggling to focus on my report I was supposed to be writing. Just when I began typing someone yanked my chair and I away from my desk.

“Baby girl, we get it, you’re bored, but damn you’re annoying,” Morgan spoke, his voice laced with laughter.

Blushing slightly, I complained, “I’m sorry! i can’t take another day of paperwork! I just can’t! how do you all manage it?!”

“We are just as irritated Y/n, we'll get a case soon, ask Hotch to take a break and go walk around or something. Just please stop the noise.” Derek said, patting my shoulder. When I stood up, Hotch rushed into the room.

“Conference room in 5, we got a case.” Aaron huffed.

I excitedly jump up, “YES! FINALLY!” Earning stifled giggles from Emily, Spencer, and Derek.

We all rushed to the conference room, files and pens in hand, eager to get out of the bullpen for a little while. “Okay, so we have a case in Arlington, Texas. Three women were found dead in several construction sites, gagged and tied with burn marks across their chest. Two other women were reported missing two days ago, possibly taken by our unsub.” Rossi explains with a hardened look making its way to his face. 

“Okay team, wheels up in 30.” Aaron chimes in, breaking up our silence. 

As a whole we head to the desks and grab our to-go bags., tidying up our workspaces, to be ready for our reports when we get back. “Y/n, can you sit with me on the jet, I want to sleep and you’re the only one who really lets me sleep on their shoulder and keeps me warm.” Spencer asks with a quiet voice. 

“Of course pretty boy, anytime for you,” I answer with a smile. The both of us walk to the jet side by side, hand brushing against each other, his skin soft and cold compared to my warm one. We stayed quiet the whole time, until we made it into the jet, situating our bags and settling in. Spencer takes a window seat at one of the tables, I sit next to him as Hotch makes his way across from us. 

Once everyone is settled and ready to go, the jet starts us on our journey. Soon after Spencer begins to snore while his head lay on my shoulder. “What book are you reading now, Y/n?” Hotch questioned, nodding his head towards the novel in my hands. 

Lifting it to reveal the title, “Full Dark, No Stars, by Stephen King.” He raised his brow in examination. “It’s a novel composed of four different stories. They’re about murder, love affairs, such and such.” I slightly giggled.

Aaron chuckled, “Don’t you get enough of that stuff everyday? On the job?”

“The writing fascinates me, I don’t know why, maybe the same way romance novels entice ‘normal’ people.” I claim as I shake my head, shrugging a little.

“You’re something else,” the dark haired man added, going back to the newspaper in front of him. I turn my attention back to my book, getting lost in the pages. Spencer shifted in his sleep, laying down in my lap, tucking one of his arms underneath my legs, pulling me closer. Just like instinct, I used my free hand to play with his beautiful long hair. He began to softly hum from relaxation.  It seemed like hours, with Spencer contently asleep on my thighs and my hand tracing shapes on his chest. 

I felt a light tap on my shoulder, “Pretty boy still asleep?” Morgan examined from the couch next to us on the other side of the aircraft. I nodded. “Good, because we need to discuss the issue at hand.” I slowly closed my book with a confused look, placing it gently on the table. “The unsub is after women like you, about the same age, same height, same hair color. We don’t want you to feel pressured to do anything but-” 

“I’ll do it,” I cut Derek off. I looked at Aaron who was now listening.

He cleared his throat, “Are you sure? We knew Spencer would disagree if we asked while he was awake. If you are comfortable with this, we can brief you on our plan.”

I bowed my head in agreement. “Can we just keep it from this one?” motioning to the doctor snoring in my lap. Both men nodded, leaving the conversation at that. The jet filling with silence again as everyone, but us three, slept.

A bell rang above us, letting us know that we’d be landing in a few. I mildly shook Reid awake. His darting his eyes open and making eye contact with me.“Are we there?” he asked groggily. 

“Yea, sleep good babe?” The nickname causing him to blush, the nickname was platonic, or used to be until recently, now you called him it because you began to fall for the young man, hoping he would pick up what you were putting down. Though you made several attempts to make your flirting noticeable, Spencer seemed to dismiss them, or maybe not pay attention to them. 

“Y-yeah, I slept good, I was warm the whole time, thank you.” He spoke, patting you on your leg where he slept previously. 

Emily stood up and stretched with a yawn. “Damn my back hurts, JJ took up most of the couch.” she grumbled. 

“Okay? You kept twitching in your sleep!” JJ countered with a groan. The two girls gather their things. Rossi remained quiet, putting his papers into his satchel and packing up. 

“Alright, we’ll head to the hotel, get a few hours of sleep and get to work first thing in the morning.” Hotch explained as he exited the aircraft, Spencer and I trailing behind. The short ride to the hotel was very quiet, everyone was already half asleep. As we arrived, Hotch spoke sleepily “Okay same as usual, double up, the rooms should have two beds, so Morgan and I, JJ and Emily, Spencer and Y/n.” He handed us our keys and made his way to his room.

JJ stretched and yawned out “Yep, definitely headed straight to bed.” Emily giggled and nodded, the two of them leaving us behind with a ‘goodnight’.

“I’m not tired so I think I’m going to head to the bar for a little bit,” Derek shrugged, picking up his go bag and waving at us as he left the lobby.

“Looks like it’s just you and me Boy Wonder,” I gleamed.

All Spencer responded with was a warm smile and leading the way to our shared room. We didn’t talk the whole walk, it was a comfortable silence. Once we reached the door, Spencer stepped back to let me use my key on the lock. With a content sigh I threw the door open to reveal a single bed and a tiny bathroom. No words were spoken as we settled in, each getting into our pajamas, and doing our nightly routines. He was the first to finish and dive underneath the covers of the squeaky bed without hesitation. We had shared a bed tons of times, but only for me recently, it made me a little nervous.

“Spence, can you maybe scoot over more?” I ask quietly.

“I’m on my half, there's plenty enough room for you still.” The genius spoke into the darkness of the room.

“Oh, okay, I just wanted to make sure we both had space.” I lied, queasy at the fact that I was going to sleep close to my best friend who I was in love with. Walking over and slightly pulling the cover back, I slid into the sheets, careful to avoid Spence.

“If you’re cold, you can come closer, I know how you like to sleep warm.” He suggested, lightly turning to his side for you to cuddle up to him.

Clearing my throat, “N-no, I’m okay. Thanks though, goodnight.”

He stayed hushed for a second, he seemed to be taken back by my response. “Oh...Okay.” He then rolled over, facing his back to me.

As much as I wanted to, I couldn't, especially with my current situation. I didn’t want him to know that I love him, well I did, but I was afraid of what he would think. Does he love me back? Is this all just in my head? What should I do- and just like that, my rambling had put me to sleep.

The next morning I awoke to a light breath fanning across my face. Confused, I open my eyes to reveal a sleeping Spencer, pulling me tight against his chest, with my head in the crook of his neck. It was nice and serene. But it came to an end when I finally realized that I was cuddling him. I got up as quickly and as quietly as possible, careful not to wake the doctor. I rushed to the bathroom to get dressed and get the hell out of there.

But as soon as I attempted a run for the door, “Y/n? What time is it? Are we late?” Reid asks groggily.

“Nope! I just promised the girls I’d meet them downstairs for coffee!” I mislead, hurrying out the door and towards JJ and Emily’s room. Banging on the door I pleaded, “Please tell me you’re awake! I need you to open the door!”

The door swung open, “Woah woah! Slow down? What happened?!” Em questioned as you stepped inside to see that both her and JJ were up and ready.

“I don’t want to talk about it, can we just go get coffee or breakfast? Please?” I panicked.

The girls exchanged a look but nodded and followed me down to the small cafe the hotel had.

The walk down was quick, no one spoke. That was until we sat at a small table after ordering our coffees.

“So, you want to tell us what that was about?” JJ raises an eyebrow at me.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I forced a smile.

“Oh you mean the fact that she’s in love with a pretty boy and has been trying to avoid her feelings?” Emily questions, knowingly, causing me to choke on my coffee.

Trying to dab the spilled coffee off my blouse I ask, “How do you know that?! I mean- what?”

The two girls giggle at me. “Just a hunch,” the brunette quirks. “Relax, it’s obvious he feels the same. He’s absolutely crass about you. Someone can barely say your name and the boy blushes.”

JJ nods in agreement as she sips her mocha. “You can’t avoid it forever Y/n, what's the worst that can happen?”

“Yea, I guess you’re right, I just don’t want things to change between us.” I explain.

“The only reason why they have right now, is because you’ve been making it weird! Stop that!” Emily states while waving her hand in the air to make her point stick.

“Okay okay. I’ll stop.” I lauroll my eyes with amusement. “But today, I have to focus on going undercover. Especially behind Spencer’s back for the most part.” I spoke, furrowing my eyebrows in worry.

“Y/n, it will be okay. All you have to do is dress up, walk a few street corners, and we’ll get the unsub. It’ll be done and over with and Spencer would have nothing to worry about. You’re a strong woman who can fend for herself.” JJ told me, in hopes to alleviate my stress.

I nodded, trying to ignore the growing pit of nervousness in my stomach.

“Hey pretty ladies, nice to know you didn’t give us the option of coffee and gossip this morning.” Derek claims as he makes his way to the table with Hotch and Spencer following shortly behind him.

Spencer caught my eye. He seems pissed off, a mean look splayed across his face. “Y/n, we need to talk.”

In shock I look at the faces which surrounded me at the table, “Um yea, let’s go out into the lobby.”

Spencer quickly left me behind as I timidly arose from my seat and chased him.

“When were you going to tell me?!” He forcefully asked.

“Tell you what?” I attempted to answer.

“That you were going undercover! That you were going to put yourself in harm's way?!” He slightly shouted.

This angered me, “I didn’t realize that I had to run my OWN decisions by YOU! Last time I checked, I was a grown woman. This is for the better, to stop this murderer! You are NOT my father, you are NOT my owner, and last time i checked, you are NOT my boyfriend!” I exclaimed back.

Spencer seemed taken back, his face showed shock and dismay. He was speechless, a hint of sadness in his eyes.

“What? NOW you don’t say something? Unbelievable Spencer.” I exaggerate, turning on my heel and leaving him to himself in the hotel lobby.

To Be Continued...

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