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buddiefamily · 3 years

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This is a result of people insisting Eddie didn’t have a reaction. He did! He’s just not as expressive as Buck so it wasn’t visible from space.

I Got You, Always [read on ao3]

rating: explicit, no warnings apply, friends to lovers, protective eddie

Eddie had just taken most of his gear off when he heard Chimney ask: “Where’s Buck?”

As if they all didn’t know perfectly well where Buck was. He felt his body shake. With fear or anger, he wasn’t sure. He had plenty reason for both. He was fuming with fury at Buck’s parents for treating him like he didn’t matter, for making him feel like he was nothing better than defective parts, who does that to their child? He couldn’t help but be angry at Hen and Chimney too, for letting Buck separate from the rest of them, god knew Buck was in no state to even be working at all, let alone this, him alone. And he was scared, alright. He was terrified. Not that he’d ever show or admit to it, but he was. He was terrified for Buck, who more than anything needed to know he’s loved and appreciated. Not this, not being all by himself! How could they allow this?

In an attempt to hide his distress, his fear, he threw his hands up at Chimney and Hen in a gesture that said and you let him?

Then he heard Buck’s voice, reporting to the IC and he let out a sigh of relief, once again being able to breathe properly. Buck was okay.

But then he said he was surrounded, lost, and Eddie felt like his lungs would give out at any second. He looked at Bobby, pleading, he didn’t care anymore. They needed to go back in, they needed to get to Buck.

There was an explosion.

Eddie’s heart stopped.

Bobby gave a short nod, then they were all gearing up again, running towards the entrance. Eddie couldn’t will his legs to move fast enough. He knew it wasn’t humanly possible to run much faster with all the weight of his gear, but he had to try. And try he did, leaving the rest of his team a good few yards behind him, rushing to Buck as fast as he could.

When he saw him, finally, his first instinct was to make sure Buck was okay, that he wasn’t hurt, he wanted to hold Buck and to never let go. But there was a job to be done. So he only allowed himself half a second to collect his heart from where it was shattered all around him, then he got to work. His team was there, right behind him. He couldn’t be more thankful.

They were out of the building, Buck was sitting in the back of an ambulance, Bobby and Hen by his side. Eddie was aching to talk to Buck, more than anything he wanted to be the one by his side. But he wasn’t selfish. He knew what Buck needed right then, and it wasn’t him. What Buck needed was to hear that he had people who cared about him, people who would always be there for him, who he could rely on. So he let Bobby and Hen talk to Buck, then Athena – Eddie was so glad she was there, he knew how much her and Bobby meant to Buck – and all Eddie did was wait. He stood and watched, never once taking his eyes off Buck. He watched his expression shift from grief and guilt to something more content and calm and finally, when he talked to Athena, Eddie saw Buck smile.

Eddie was still worried. Maybe Buck was out of physical danger now, but that sure as hell didn’t mean he was okay. Still, he didn’t go over and talk to Buck, he didn’t trust himself to stay composed. He’d talk to him in the morning. Eddie knew that was selfish of him, but at least it was better than the alternative. Buck needed him to be strong, he’d be of no use if he talked to Buck now, he’d break down and cry. Neither of them needed that.

Eddie went home.

As much as he wished to hug his son, Chris was asleep already, so Eddie settled for a forehead kiss and a whispered I love you. He went to his own room, closing the door carefully behind him. Only then, in the privacy of his own bedroom, did he allow himself to let go. He wasn’t aware of making a conscious decision to move his body, but the next thing he knew he was curled on the floor, his breath coming out in short puffs. His eyes were burning with tears, he felt them streaming down his cheeks. His body shook. He heard a sob before he even realized it left his own mouth.

Later, when he could catch his breath again, he would wonder why he was so wrecked, so worried. He’d tell himself Buck was in no imminent danger, in no life-threatening situation. He’d stare at the wall, trying to figure out why his heart ached so much to see Buck doubt himself like he did earlier that day, then throw himself at the first opportunity to get hurt. His panic would rise once again for a moment, fearing that maybe that was Buck’s intention, to get hurt. He would remember his street fighting, how Buck knew immediately, how he paid attention. And then it would down on him, attention. That was what Buck wanted, needed, what he never got from his parents. So he learned to ask for it, it the craziest loudest ways possible, because that’s all that ever worked. Stealing the fire truck, the lawsuit, it all suddenly made sense. And Eddie’s heart would break again. For Buck who felt, no matter how loved he was, that people didn’t notice him, didn’t care. He would hate himself for not realizing sooner, for not being able to fix it. Eddie would sit on his bedroom floor for hours, asking himself why all this hurt so much, why Buck’s pain hurt him.

And the answer was right there, right in front of him, if he only listened to his heart.

The next morning, as he got ready to work, he stood in front of the mirror and swore to his reflection that he would stay composed. For Buck’s sake. And he would have done it, he really had faith in himself. But then Buck’s parents showed up at the firehouse, and Eddie lost every tiny fiber of his cool.

Screw composed; Eddie had a lot to say.

What made him even angrier was that everyone else seemed so unbothered by their presence, even Chimney who must have known better than anyone what kind of people they were. Yet he just sat with them, narrating Buck’s heroic rescues, one after another. Eddie couldn’t listen to it anymore.

“Your son is a hero, in every sense of the word,” he said, his voice firm. The silence that suddenly surrounded them was deafening. He could fell all eyes on him. He didn’t care. He continued: “He’s a hero, but he had never once in his life felt like one.”

“Eddie-” Hen tried to warn him, to stop him, knowing full well where the conversation would go. Eddie didn’t even acknowledge her.

“Your son is the most selfless, caring, compassionate person I know. I doubt he learned any of that from you.”

There was a gasp, Mrs. Buckley nearly jumped out of her chair, no doubt ready to defend herself, to find some half-hearted excuse.

“He loves so freely, he gives everything he has to others, yet he never feels seen, appreciated,” Eddies voice was still firm, even as he struggled to catch his breath, “loved.”

He looked around. Most people have left the floor, only Hen and Chim were still hanging around. For whose sake, he wasn’t quite sure. He looked back to Mr. and Mrs. Buckley, half expecting an argument, something like but we love him.

It never came. Instead-

“Tell us about him.”

He must have heard wrong.

“You seem to care about Evan a great deal, why don’t you tell us what he’s like?” Mr. Buckley was looking at him expectantly. He felt anger rise in his chest. These people didn’t deserve to be a part of Buck’s life. But he caught Hen’s gaze, stern, and he sighed. Fine. But he would do it his way.

“Buck,” he emphasized, “his name is Buck.”

When Buck arrived with Bobby, announcing a clean bill of health, Eddie once again wished he could hold Buck and never let go. But his captain was there, the rest of his team at his heel, just like always. It had to wait.

So instead, he joked.

“Show-off.”

And Buck’s smile was worth every bit of the pain he felt.

“I had to do it,” Buck told him, as if Eddie didn’t already know that. He couldn’t help but smile too.

“I knew you did,” he replied, because every little reassurance he could give to Buck, he would.

They just stood there for a moment, easy silence between them, then Eddie’s expression changed. Buck could tell right away. How he read Eddie so easily sometimes, it was almost scary.

“You got some visitors,” he told Buck and watched his face fall as he realized the implication.

Once again, all Eddie could do was wait. He watched Buck disappear up the stairs, hoping he’d get his moment to spend with Buck after. But then he announced he was going to see Maddie and all Eddie could say to him before he left was: “I’m here for you if you need me.”

Then he was all alone in his house again, Chris fast asleep by the time he got home from his shift. He wished Carla goodnight, waved her off when she offered to stay with him, insisted he was fine.

This time he didn’t make it to the bedroom before he felt his chest tighten and the tears warm on his cheeks. He was alone anyway, it didn’t matter. Except maybe he was less alone than he thought.

There was a knock on the door.

Before he could even stand up from his spot on the couch, he heard the key turn in the lock and the door opened, revealing Buck. Eddie rushed to him, wiping his tears as best as he could without Buck noticing.

“You said you’d be here when I needed you,” Buck said, his eyes fixed on his shoes. Eddie opened his mouth to reassure him that he would, always, but then Buck continued, and Eddie could only stare.

“I’m sorry, Eddie, I should have realized what that meant. I should have known that was you asking to see me.”

At that Eddie couldn’t hold his tears any longer.

“No, Buck, that’s not what I meant. I did want to see you, because I never got to talk to you yesterday, but I would never ask that of you, not when you have your own problems to worry about.” Eddie stepped closer, taking hold of Buck’s hands, he needed him to understand this wasn’t about him.

“I know, Eds, that’s exactly why I should have known.” Buck looked so devastated. He went to hell and back with his family and the factory fire, yet here he was, worrying about Eddie.

So Eddie tried to explain to him, how it didn’t matter what he felt, how Buck was his priority now. And Buck just laughed. A soft honest laugh. Eddie felt his chest tighten, this time the feeling was different. Warm.

“It’s not a competition, you know,” he said, then walked to the couch, still holding onto Eddie’s hands, dragging him along, “we can be here for each other.”

Eddie pulled him in for a hug. Buck wrapped his hands around Eddie’s waist, holding on for dear life. Buck really did need him, Eddie realized. He held on just as tight, one hand around Buck’s shoulders, the other in his hair, stroking lightly.

“I got you,” he whispered. Now that he finally had Buck in his arms, he wasn’t gonna let go. Thankfully, it seemed Buck agreed with that sentiment, not letting go of Eddie’s waist even as they sat down on the couch.

After a moment of silence, Buck said: “Hen told me you yelled at my parents.” He didn’t sound angry, so Eddie didn’t apologize. He didn’t know what else to say, luckily he didn’t have to because Buck continued, his tone lighter now: “Thank you. Although I do wonder what you told them. My mother said you were a keeper, any idea what she meant by that?”

Eddie went red in the face.

“I showed them pictures of you and Chris, she- she must have assumed,” Eddie stammered, pulling away from Buck, “I’m so sorry, Buck, I swear I didn’t-”

Buck’s grip on Eddie’s hips tightened, not letting him go too far.

“It’s okay, Eddie.” Buck’s voice was so calm, there was a small smile on his lips. Eddie was speechless. Once again, it didn’t matter, because Buck spoke again: “Thank you.”

Eddie stared at Buck, his eyes roaming Buck’s face, searching for answers. Why did he suddenly feel so warm with Buck’s hands on him, why did his heart beat like crazy, why were his hands shaking as he reached to touch Buck again? This time, when the answer stared him in the face, quite literally, he didn’t try to hide, to run away.

He wasn’t brave enough to say the words, so he leaned in and placed a soft kiss on Buck’s forehead. Buck, who watched Eddie tuck Chris into bed more times than he could count, knew exactly what it meant. He wrapped his hands around Eddie in a crushing embrace, and whispered against his ear: “Me too, Eddie.” Then he felt Buck’s lips at his jaw, and as much as he wanted to stay in Buck’s embrace for the rest of eternity, there was something else he was dying to do.

So he pulled back, only to lean back in and finally, finally, kissed Buck’s lips.

Buck’s hands were on his face in an instant, holding gently, his thumbs caressing his cheeks softly. His lips were just as soft, careful, moving painfully slowly against Eddie’s. But there was no rush, Eddie told himself, he could enjoy this. So he did. He kissed Buck with just a little more pressure, he gripped Buck’s shoulders just that bit tighter, finally understanding why his heart always felt heavy and light at the same time when he was with Buck. He let Buck kiss him back any way he wanted, he let Buck bite at his lower lip, let his tongue trace his lip, against his tongue, and he felt his heart fill with warmth and explode over and over. He kissed Buck’s jaw, leaving a trail of kisses down his neck to his collarbones. Buck’s hands were on Eddie’s skin now, his shirt pulled up by Buck’s curious fingers. Eddie felt Buck’s fingernails running gently up and down his lower back and he shivered, letting out a sigh.

“You like that?” Buck asked him, his voice deep and raspy. His nails were now firmer on Eddie’s back, more insistent. He moaned. And that was all the answer Buck needed.

His lips were on Eddie’s again, his hands never leaving Eddie’s back. Even when – after making sure that’s what Eddie wanted – he was taking off Eddie’s shirt, he managed to keep one hand on his hip. Eddie wasn’t sure if it was meant to reassure or tease him, either way he was thankful. Buck only let go to take his own shirt off, and even that short moment left Eddie feeling cold and alone. Then Buck’s hands were all over him, as if he couldn’t get enough of Eddie’s skin, as if holding Eddie forever wouldn’t be enough.

They made their way to the bedroom, only stopping once to make out against the wall, Eddie pressing his body against Buck’s, feeling Buck’s erection at his hip. After that, it was only thanks to Buck’s strong hands pushing him away and towards the bedroom, that they even made it there. Then the door was closed behind them and Buck’s hands were on Eddie’s hips, pushing his sweatpants down and off, along with his underwear. Eddie tried to do the same for Buck, struggling with his belt buckle, until Buck took pity on him and took the rest of his clothes off himself.

Eddie was pushing him towards the bed, crawling on top of him. Their bodies were flush against each other’s, nothing but skin on skin. Eddie was breathless. For once, it was a good feeling. He looked at Buck, who looked back at him, waiting. Buck was waiting for Eddie to make a move, to set the pace, Buck was giving him a go-ahead for anything he wanted. But Eddie couldn’t do that, couldn’t possibly do something – anything – if he wasn’t entirely sure that’s what Buck wanted. So he asked: “What do you want, Buck?”

“Anything,” he replied, his voice low, “everything.”

And that wasn’t very helpful to Eddie. But if Buck wanted everything, he sure as hell would deliver. And if in the process he could get Buck to tell him what he really wanted, well, that would only be a bonus.

So he leaned down, his elbows supporting his weight, and he kissed Buck slowly. He let his lips ghost over Buck’s until he felt Buck trying to press closer, only then did he allow for an actual kiss. He licked and sucked at Buck’s lips, his hands on each side of Buck’s torso, not touching. He tried to ignore Buck’s hard cock pressing against his, he held his hips still. Buck’s hands were on Eddie’s back again, his nails digging in and it was almost enough for Eddie to abandon his plan and let Buck have anything, everything.

But he didn’t budge. Instead, he took hold of both Buck’s wrists and brought them above his head, holding them against the pillow with one of his hands. The other hand he used to prop himself us so that his hips weren’t touching Buck’s.

Buck groaned it frustration but said nothing. So Eddie kissed his neck, both his shoulders, sucked a hickey right over where his heart was, all the while still holding Buck’s wrists. And Buck made all the sounds Eddie never even thought to dream about. And he tried to move his hips, tried to free his hands to touch Eddie, but Eddie was having none of that.

“Stay still,” he demanded in the most authoritative tone he could muster in the moment, “and keep your hands where they are.” It seemed to work like magic, Buck went perfectly still and when Eddie let go of Buck’s wrists, his hands didn’t move an inch. Eddie nodded approvingly, then went to trail kisses down Buck’s chest and stomach. When he got all the way to his hips, he sucked a mark on each side, making Buck moan, struggling to stay still. Eddie moved lower; he could feel Buck hold his breath in anticipation.

Ignoring Buck’s erection, Eddie kissed down his thigh.

“Eddie,” Buck sighed in frustration.

Eddie traced his lips to Buck’s knee, then took hold of his ankle and moved Buck’s leg so that it was bent. He kissed Buck’s knee again, then moved his lips and tongue and teeth to Buck’s inner thigh. He heard Buck take in a sharp breath, he heard him try to muffle his sighs by biting his lip. When he worked his way almost all the way up Buck’s thigh, Eddie felt him hold his breath again.

Eddie switched to Buck’s other leg, repeating the process, dragging it out even more. His own dick was achingly hard, but he focused on Buck instead. Kissing and nibbling at the sensitive skin of Buck’s thigh. Buck’s sighs and groans were a mixture of pleasure and frustration, until finally Eddie heard him say: “Eddie, please!”

That was his cue.

He stopped licking at Buck’s skin, pulled away, and looked up at Buck asking with fake innocence: “Please, what?”

“Fuck me,” was what Buck said.

Eddie couldn’t even congratulate himself on how easy that was, he felt a shiver run all the way through him.

“That’s not exactly how I prefer to call it, but…”

He reached for his bedside table, taking out lube and a condom, then climbed over to Buck again. Their eyes locked, Eddie could see Buck’s lips twitch, trying not to smile. Apparently, Eddie wasn’t the only one playing a game here.

“Make love to me, Eddie.”

And that was it for him, he couldn’t hold back any longer. He grabbed the bottle of lube and squeezed out what was probably too much, but he couldn’t care less. He pressed a slick finger against Buck’s hole, not quite pressing in just yet, just circling around.

Buck moaned. The sound made Eddie’s head spin. He pressed his finger in gently, watching Buck’s face to make sure he wasn’t hurting him in any way. He moved his finger carefully in and out until Buck asked formore Eddie please I need more. He added another finger, his other hand holding Buck’s hip gently but firmly. Then it was three of Eddie’s fingers inside Buck and the only words leaving Buck’s mouth was a mantra of please please please as Eddie’s fingers brushed his prostate over and over. When he pulled out his fingers, Buck made a sound at the loss, almost like a sob. Eddie kissed his stomach.

“I got you,” he promised.

He struggled with the condom for longer than he’d wish to admit, his hands shaking. Once he figured it out, he reached for the lube again, coating his cock, then tossing the bottle somewhere by the foot of the bed. He leaned over Buck who was looking at him with so much love in his face Eddie nearly passed out. He positioned himself between Buck’s legs, pressing his cock against Buck’s already slick hole. He placed his hands on Buck’s hips and pushed in. Buck’s eyes closed, his hands tangled in the pillows, still trying to stay still. Eddie leaned in to kiss him softly.

“You can touch me, Buck,” he whispered.

Buck let out the biggest sigh of relief, his hands going to Eddie’s shoulders immediately. Eddie kept their bodies pressed flush against each other’s as he moved his hips, his lips never once leaving Buck’s skin. He pushed in and out slowly, listening to Buck’s sighs and moans, his ear right next to Buck’s lips. As much as Buck seemed to be content with their slow pace, Eddie wanted more. He sped up his thrusts, only just enough so that Buck picked up on it, could stop him if he wanted to. He didn’t. He pushed his hips up to meet Eddie’s, gripping his shoulders tight for leverage.

That little change in angle was all it took, Eddie now hitting Buck’s prostate with each thrust. Buck had to press his lips against Eddie’s in an attempt not to scream. Eddie held onto Buck, kissing back messily, he felt his own orgasm approaching.

“Eddie-” Buck pulled away; spoke to warn Eddie he was close. Eddie kissed the corner of his lips.

“I got you,” he said again, then sped up his thrusts even more, angling his hips just right. Buck came, burying his lips in Eddie’s shoulder to silence himself. Eddie followed short after, collapsing on top of Buck.

After they were cleaned up and cuddled on the bed, this time under the covers, Buck’s head on Eddie’s chest, Eddie’s hands wrapped around Buck protectively, Eddie teased: “A keeper, huh?”

Buck laughed. He kissed Eddie’s jaw.

“You definitely are a keeper,” Buck said with a soft smile, then added, “thanks again, for standing up for me. I really appreciate it.”

And Eddie just looked at him fondly.

“I got you, always.”

#buck begins #the episode emotionally destroyed me #and he did have a reaction yall are just blind #buddie #buddie fanfiction #911 fox #buddie fic #friends to lovers #idiots in love #ao3 #fanfiction #evan buckley #eddie diaz

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scifimagpie · 6 years

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Want to Write Better Books? Stop Watching Television

When it comes to storytelling, most of us grow up immersed in visual language. Television and movies and Youtube series can be extremely potent, and tell inspiring stories - but when it comes to translating that storytelling method to the page, they can be a writer's worst enemy.

I can always tell when people have been watching more TV than reading books because there's a similar pattern of errors. Drawing from my own screw-ups and experiences and combining them with things I've learned from reading hundreds of books, I've compiled a useful list intended for newer writers with an eye on publishing.

At the risk of bowing to clickbait with my title, I'd like to make a case for aspiring writers to scale back their television-watching time and spend that on short and long-form fiction. Even fanfiction inspired by TV can help exercise that writing muscle more than watching stories alone, and I've made the reasons why into an easy-to-read list.

1) TV writing is often bad and illogical

There's no good way to put this - the behaviour of characters on Lifetime made-for-TV movies, criminal dramas, and night-time dramas or medical shows is often exaggerated and vastly distant from reality. The best TV shows and movies do have good writing - but let's be honest; we don't always watch the best of the best. That's not a bad thing, but when it comes to writing, 'you are what you eat' is very much an applicable idiom.

It's hard to write emotionally authentic decisions and ethical debates when paranormal teenagers are fighting in the most dramatic ways possible. Because of the narrative constraints of episodic storytelling, which is the norm for continuing TV shows, antagonists are often thinly written and illogical, and characters who conflict with the main cast tend to be cruel, rude, or selfish in ways that an actual human person would not dare to be when confronted or opposed. Villains and antagonists are an important part of every story, and they're usually the biggest letdown, because their actions are often dictated by whatever inflicts the most suffering on main characters. Shows have to compress as much interest in the problem-of-the-week as possible, while still adhering to the (usually more complex) long-term plot.

The thing is, these are really bad habits for writers to pick up. It's taken me a lot of work to unlearn the villain-of-convenience habit. Antagonists and villains need to have strong motivations - even stronger than the protagonist(s)', at times. Otherwise, their actions make no sense on a fundamental level, and the narrative thread of the story will completely unravel. This is not to say that antagonists and villains have to be "evil" per se - in fact, evil is usually a matter of perspective. However, stories are driven by what people want and the people who want things. If they don't have a thing they want that remains somewhat consistent, or has a reason for changing, the story will sputter and its engine will stop turning over.

2) Visual storytelling and literary storytelling are different mediums

This sounds obvious, but hear me out. In working on a recent project, a character went up the stairs after a party, took off her jewelry, texted her friend - and suddenly, her abusive alcoholic father appeared in her room and started threatening her. The scene was clearly patterned after the classic "jump scare" style.

The problem is that jump scares don't work in written fiction. In order to mimic the effect created by a jump scare, we have to break down the scene and the rising tension created by it. A camera panning around and showing the scene, the slow shot of a character walking up the stairs, and the subtle tension created by having a character do ordinary things without realising that they are in danger may not be conveyed by simply saying that character walks up the stairs, takes off their jewelry, and prepares to use the bathroom. Those words don't express the information conveyed by the same camera shots and edits, or by the creeping shriek of violins or synth music in a score. Words can express that tension - but not if writers take what they see on TV (or computer) screens at face value.

Mimicry is not enough. We have to understand why things happen and why we are shown or given certain pieces of information, and why things are portrayed in certain ways. We must learn to see the framing devices used in fiction of all kinds, not accept them as the way the world works.

3) Hide things from the reader

As the audience, we may not realise that storytelling techniques are being used to convey a story, because we're busy reacting to it. That's okay! It's good to watch or read something and just experience the emotions intended, and enjoy the ride of the story. However, if a book has a deep impact on you, and you admire it, it's worth reading the book at least one more time to try and see the places where it was most effective.

For example, in a tense scene, a character might scan a room, looking for a weapon, and the author or narrator may describe the contents of said room.

In a dingy hotel, a bed covered in rumpled sheets, the bolted-down lamps and furniture and a clunky television may not offer much. As the character looks around, they might notice there are some glasses on the bureau or in the bathroom, and pick those up, hoping to throw them at the assailant pounding on their door.

In this vignette, the words 'pounding', 'dingy', and 'rumpled' offer the most descriptive power. However, we don't know what the antagonist on the other side of the door looks like, what kind of weapons they have, if any, or even what their name is. While there might be a little more context in a book, the very limited scope of this one scene shows that using immediacy and restricting the view and information available to the reader can create more tension.

I often see this problem in longer-form works as well - and I've certainly made the mistake myself: the error of trying to cram in too much exposition in the first few chapters. It's hard not to worry that an audience will get lost or miss something, but audiences just don't need as much information to enjoy a story as authors do to write it.

4) All books are not created equal

Some books are designed to convey a story as efficiently as possible, often to meet the reader's emotional needs - this is the case for most commercial fiction. Some books are intended to please the reader's intellect or evoke more complex emotions, and often take their time in the storytelling or break rules - this is often the case for literary fiction. Upmarket fiction combines both of these needs. That's not to say that commercial fiction can't have moments of beauty, or that literary fiction can't be fun to read, but it's important to know that these two broad types of fiction have different goals - and that both have their advantages and disadvantages.

It's important to know which markets your book is destined for, and to be honest about it with yourself. Do you write weird fiction that kind of straddles genres and has little philosophical narrative kicks? Do you secretly just want to write fun books about sex and guns? Do you like writing about kissing and emotional drama, but crave a good plot to complicate things? There are readers who want books like each of these, and looking for similar books to yours can help you figure out who will want to read it.

It's vitally important not to confuse the people you want to impress with the people who will probably read your book. I've made this mistake. It's hard not to want to change the world with a book, but you're more likely to achieve that goal if you get the book into the hands of people who will like it in the first place - enthusiastic readers will share what they like, and word of mouth is still the oldest and strongest form of marketing.

5) If you're working in a medium, engage with it

Having a good vocabulary is essential. This seems like a daunting task - how do we learn more words? Where do we even get the words? How do we know which words are better to use? However, it's not as bad as it sounds. Reading non-fiction news articles in one's Facebook feed can help; honestly, just snatching everything with written words in it and picking it up to read it, even warning signs in bathroom stalls or advertisements at bus stops, can make a difference.

Of course, books and short stories are an ideal place to start. Short stories and short story collections can be a great way to work more fiction into your diet. Ideally, it's best to read a wide variety of books. Having favorite authors is fine, and having favorite genres is fine, but both a) reading widely within your genre and b) reading widely in general will help you try new things and expose you to different ideas and inspirations. Have you ever read a western? An old Harlequin bodice-ripper? A modern romance novel? Women's fiction? A techno-thriller? African-American literary fiction? A gay coming-of-age tale? Grab something off the shelf with your eyes closed and start reading - you don't even have to start from the beginning, if you really don't want to, but try to give the strange new book a chance.

The more you read, the more comfortable your brain will become with the storytelling methods, conventions, and styles that authors use. It's not about copying people or being 'unoriginal', although those are okay for practice techniques - it's about fluency. Writing well is very difficult if you don't read!

6) Emotions are important

Just putting in a description of a character's actions doesn't convey their mood, emotions, or what's going on inside their heads. It can - but it's essential to think about why a character is doing something, and which life experiences have contributed to the decision they're undertaking in that moment. People never just do things - and stopping to consider why a character grabs a wire hanger to fight back, whether they'd cower or flee, and whether they'd be able to speak their thoughts honestly are all vital to communication.

In daily life, we may hesitate to speak or act frankly, and that's not always a bad thing. There's something to be said for honesty, but there's also something to be said for respecting the feelings and desires or needs of others. For example, if Manpreet and Cynthia are friends, and Cynthia is wearing a new sweater she just finished knitting, Manpreet may want to tell her the sweater is ugly. But then Manpreet's desire for validation of her opinion will conflict with Cynthia's need for validation of her efforts. There's nothing wrong with these conflicts, nor with learning when to hold one's tongue or put something carefully, and expressing that characters are going through those steps is a great way to show conflict and emotion in a work of fiction.

7) Traditional literature may not be for you

Frankly, I think more authors should try different storytelling formats just to see if they find one that's a better fit. Books tend to be the default for creative storytelling, but honestly, they're just not for everyone because they don't always skew to people's internal storytelling style. Sometimes books just don't play to people's strengths. People who are dialogue-oriented may find that plays do the trick. People who like visuals that are continuous may want to try out writing screenplays of various kinds. Still others may want to try writing graphic novels, and either hiring illustrators or illustrating work themselves. The trick is to figure out how you think - in pictures? In moments? In words? - and find the medium that expresses your feelings and thoughts most adequately.

Telling a story is an act of communication, and to communicate well requires a lot of effort, practice, and study. New authors should consider this before rushing to publish their first work, because the enthusiasm and fire of the story experience inside an author's head may be different from the experience of the reader from going through content on the page.

Ultimately, writing is hard. There's a reason that career authors, amateurs, and aspiring writers often despair over it. And honestly, that's okay. There's a joy to the process of learning techniques, to finding the right word. Anything worth doing is worth doing well, because it's easier to get appreciation from others if your work is careful and shows skill.

8) Writing a good book means creating a book to be read

This is always the hardest part of storytelling. Do we, as writers, craft stories we want to read and tell, or for our audience? Sometimes a weird cross-genre story works, and sometimes a story pulls from so many different genres and influences and goes in so many directions that it's hard to see who will pick up on it. Many of us may dream of adulation or praise from masses of readers, but putting faces on those masses is the important part. It's okay to want that - but wanting it alone is not enough to grant it, and merely creating something is not enough to deserve fame and praise.

It's not about 'that mediocre book that's doing so well! I could write better!' - it's about writing better than yourself. It's hard, during the honeymoon phase of completing a project, not to feel like it's the apex of creative works in one's native language. If I sound sarcastic, it's because I know this euphoric high, and I know the unfortunate consequences of trusting it too blithely. Simply put, the problem is not even bad reviews - it's crickets. Unless a book is waterproofed beyond the 'good enough' state, it may not be worth reading.

All creative works are risks, and to attain the prizes of money and positive attention, it's worth making sure a book makes sense from an external perspective, and is a satisfying read. Of course, not every friend or person you know will be an ideal member of your reading audience, so finding anonymous or professional beta readers can be very helpful - even if just for the sake of seeing how a book comes across to someone who knows very little about it. You may find that your book is very appealing for a reason you totally did not anticipate.

Above all, writing the book isn't about you. It's about the audience, the characters, or the story itself.

9) Publishing is scary and hard

It's okay to be overwhelmed from time to time. It's not even that I'm trying to discourage people from putting their books out for mass consumption - it's that I want to help people make sure the books they put out are as good as possible. There's no such thing as a bad book, just an imperfect book; 99.99% of books that have issues can be saved with a good editor or editors, multiple sets of eyes, and a willingness to tweak and revise.

Drafting books is a process. It took me years to get over the idea that one draft was enough, and that I'd get every idea and nuance down in one go-through. That isn't the case, and it rarely is for many authors! Eventually, realising that I just had to get down a skeleton, and that I could modify and elaborate on things when I had the patience for them, was tremendously freeing. Not only have I stopped hating revisions, I look forward to them. When you know in your bones that the scene and the story feels right, few experiences compare to that.

Publishing, however, is a lot of work - getting used to learning about advertising, knowing where to find information about advertising, buying a cover, researching genres, writing a good blurb, finding people to hire for these various services - it can really add up to an ordeal. Still, doing all that work is a little easier and a lot more rewarding if you feel a rock-hard certainty about the quality of the book in the first place - and it can even make the other stuff easier, because you know what to draw from and what to look at.

10) If all else fails, Google is your friend

Just going for a Google safari or searching around on Amazon isn't something most of us do anymore - our 'wasted time' on the internet usually involves going to a website we already know or frequent regularly, clicking through content, and scrolling through various newsfeeds. However, these habitual paths may not yield as much information when preparing to publish. Simply going to Amazon or Google as if you were looking for a new book and entering various keywords in the search bar - things associated with your book or genre, like 'science', 'scientist', 'adventure', 'comet', 'asteroid', 'crash', 'aliens', or other pertinent terms - can be surprisingly fruitful.

You can also look up books (or shows) you admire and see what people read after reading or watching them. The more books you have to compare to, the more readers will understand your book's place in the market or library. Referencing shows and movies in a blurb is not ideal.

At he end of the day, I'm glad so many people take the leap into trying to write, and finishing projects, but actually trying to sell a book to readers isn't the same thing as merely writing for the satisfaction of it. And writing privately for satisfaction is fine! It's just that when a book hits either an editor's desk or the market, it should be as ready for readers' eyes as possible, and thoroughly vetted - even if it's been self-published.

*** Michelle Browne is a sci fi/fantasy writer. She lives in Lethbridge, AB with her partner-in-crime and their cat. Her days revolve around freelance editing, knitting, jewelry, and nightmares, as well as social justice issues. She is currently working on the next books in her series, other people's manuscripts, and drinking as much tea as humanly possible. Catch up with Michelle's news on the mailing list. Her books are available on Amazon, and she is also active on Medium, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Tumblr, and the original blog.

#writing #how to #write #writers #new writer #new author #publishing #tv #television #books #book #how to publish #ya

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darkdevasofdestruction · 7 years

Text

Kakuzu

Name:Shizuka (quiet,summer/fragrance) Uzumaki Nickname:Red Death,Crimson Assassin,Fire Hunter. Age:25 Kekkei Genkai:Enhanced sensory type,Prison-type Genjutsu,Sense-sealing Primary role:Ex-ANBU strategist,Genjutsu master. Secondary:Bounty Hunter

---------

I was sitting upside down on a tree branch,enjoying one of the books from the A Song of Fire and Ice series (aka Game of Thrones) and while I was deeply buried into the narration,I felt 2 people approaching me,but I made no move.It was no ill intent,just a passive one.

-1-:Ne,Kakuzu,are you sure about this? -2-:Yes.She is the one Leader requested. -1-:But how the hell even?!She's so small and frail and....!Gaaaah!Can't I just use her for my ritual or something?! -2-:Leader won't be too happy about it.She's the one they call Red Death. -1-:Screw the Leader!We'll just tell him she was dead already! -2-:Or not. -1-:Loosen up,old man!C'mooon! -2-:You're lucky you're immortal,otherwise you'd have been dead the second you decided to speak. -1-:*sulks*Daaaamn,Kakuzu....Jashin-sama won't be too happy about it... -2-:Why don't you sacrifice yourself?You'll do a good deed for both him and I,like the good Samaritan. -1-:Fuck you,Kakuzu... -2-:You wish. -1-:Ewww,no way,you relic! -2-:Remember never to stitch you again.Ungrateful pest.

Woaw.Such a nice team.The first one,a silvery haired,purple-eyed,foul-mouthed tall Jashinist,carrying a red scythe,and the other one,an even taller one,with a white hood and a black mask,green eyes,having a...suitcase?Oh well. I poof on another branch going upside down,facing the green eyed one,my long fire red hair falling down like a velvety curtain.

me:*clears throat*As you might have not noticed,I am well aware of your existence.Not that you were too discreet,by any means.So,if I may ask,what would your business be with me? -1-:None of your concern,bitch! me:As I was being the subject of your conversation,I do believe that it is,in fact,MY concern. -2-:Excuse him,miss,his brain doesn't work properly.Our Leader requested to see you.We are supposed to escort you to him. me:Leader...?Who exactly is your Leader?And,for common courtesies,since you already know my name,I suppose...ahem.I am Shizuka.And you? -2-:I am Kakuzu,and this brain dead idiot is my assigned partner,Hidan. Hidan:Will you stop insulting me already?! Kakuzu:No. me:Right...Nice to meet you...both. Kakuzu:Our Leader told us to tell you one specific name,and you will know the person. Me:And? Kakuzu:Uzumaki Karin.

My eyes widened and my book feel out of my grasp as I heard that name once again,after almost more than 1 decade.Karin...My long lost poor little sister... It was like the time stopped,as I was staring dead ahead,and as I snapped back to reality,I looked deep into his eyes,in disbelief.

me:Uzumaki Karin,as in,a red haired young girl,with redish-pink eyes,glasses,a cool regenerative body propriety and sealing jutsus? Kakuzu:Uh...yes.That is her,great description. Hidan:Eh...So the stupid Leader knew her...still can't think why we couldn't just say she had died prior to our arrival... me:Hidan,I advise you shut up,or else you'll wish you never blinked.Anyways,let's go.

As I jumped off the tree,Kakuzu handed me my book back,we headed in (almost) silence to the HQ.Obviously...Hidan couldn't stop talking.

me:Is he always like this? Kakuzu:Unfortunately. me:Can't you kill him? Kakuzu:He's immortal. Hidan:That's right,bitch!I sacrifice idiots like you to the great Jashin-sama,for my immortality! me:You know that I can make you shut up,right? Hidan:No,you can't! me:Wanna bet? Hidan:Yeah! me:How much? Hidan:All of Kakuzu's money!It's in his suitcase! Kakuzu:Don't bet what's not yours,idiot! me:*smirks*I accept. Hidan:And if you lose,I get to sacrifice you! me:Deal. Kakuzu:Stop this infantile bet. me:You'll thank me,Kakuzu~

As I said that,I raised 2 fingers to my eye level,I channeled my chakra to my palm,and said 'SHIRU'! (Seal) as I slapped his mouth with great force,making him fly away into the distance,making me smirk.

me:That should make him stay away,for a while,and make him unable to speak.You can thank me later. Kakuzu:That reduced a great deal of stress and rage.Thanks. me:Don't worry.He was getting too irritating anyways.

In a few hours,the 3 of us got to the HQ,situated near the border with Amegakure,and as I entered alone in the Leader's office,being greeted by a girl with blue hair and a man with orange hair and the Rinnegan.

girl:Welcome,Shizuka. me:Um...hello. man:My name is Pein and I am the Leader of this peace-bringing organization called the Akatsuki. me:Okay,but what does it have to do with my sister? Pein:Figured you'd be interested in information regarding her existence status,in exchange to your loyalty to our organization. me:Where do you have intel from? Pein:Your sister is the subordinate of an ex-partner of one of the group members.His name is Akasuna no Sasori. me:Akasuna no Sasori...So,you're telling me,she's working for Orochimaru,then? Pein:Precisely.For more information,go ask him. me:Thank you. Pein:Also,Uzumaki Shizuka,welcome to the Akatsuki. me:Thank you.

With that,Konan showed me my room,gave me green ring with the word 'Fox',gave me the Akatsuki straw hat and cloak,and with a smile,she left,leaving me alone,with my thoughts. Peace...Such a heavenly utopia.We all wish for it,yet nobody acts to achieve it.Such a pity.

I got my book and went to the living room,where other Akatsuki members were gathered,chatting or doing something.

I spotted Kakuzu on the couch,with the suitcase on the floor,counting money and I sat near him,saying a soft greeting.He nodded,acknowledging my existence,not breaking the count of the money.

Kakuzu:I suggest you make acquaintance with the red eyed one and shark face.They are the only decent ones. me:Okay...By the way...are you in charge of the money,in this organization? Kakuzu:Certainly. me:Then here.My share of productivity from the last bounty hunts. Kakuzu:You're a bounty hunter? me:Didn't really have what to do after leaving my village.And I never settled in one for real,so I had to live off something. Kakuzu:What for? me:Couldn't kill the current Kazekage...he is a great friend of mine... Kakuzu:Having emotional bonds is a weakness for a shinobi. me:May be so,but I don't care.It's a strength for me. Kakuzu:You were kicked out of your village. me:I left.But even So?I had no ties with the village.And I didn't appreciate being mocked,thrown around,and being used.But with having an emotional bond with someone,it gives you a reason not to give up,and to keep on fighting. Kakuzu:If you say so...

Suddenly,the red eyed male with long black hair,tied in a pony tail,having a calm,passive expression on his face approached me,asking about the book I was reading. I found out his name is Itachi,and his partner's name is Kisame,and so,we started chatting about books and other philosophical subjects.All was well,and I felt like I belonged here,until a certain Jashinist decided to barge in the room with his sky the and an angry expression,glaring and pointing at me.

Hidan:YOU!YOU,BITCH!HOW DARE YOU?! me:You're polluting the air,Hidan. Hidan:SHUT UP!I'll so Kill you right now! me:I want to see you try.

He charged forward,throwing his weapon at me,while I was happily sipping from my cup of tea.Was I worried?Nope.Why?Because I knew the outcome.What was it? Kakuzu dashed forward,caught the scythe handle before it touched my neck,and with his detachable fist,he punched Hidan.

Kakuzu:Leader prohibited the use of weapons or any kind of damage. Hidan:Fuck Leader's orders! me:Kakuzu,don't bother with someone like him.I'll solve it.

I went near him,stepped on his neck and made him look me in the eyes,muttering "Shirugan",imprisoning him in my Genjutsu Jail,making him shut up and cower in fear,away from here.

me:Done. Kakuzu:Can't you be my partner instead? me:Gladly.

After that,I found out that the others' names were Deidara,Sasori,Tobi and Zetsu,and we got along quite well. I even managed to briefly get across the surface of the subject regarding Karin,with Sasori. And tomorrow,was my first bounty hunt with Kakuzu and Hidan.We were supposed to hunt down a monk called Chiriku,in the Land of Fire. Thankfully,Hidan also decided to accept me as his partner,and is only bothered with making countless sacrifices to Jashin-Sama,and Kakuzu doesn't find me annoying enough to want to kill me.All is well~ We arrived in front of a huge iron wall,that was separating the outside world from the temple.

me:Okay so...How do we proceed? Kakuzu:Allow me.

He used his steel release on his left arm and punched the Wall,fully breaking it.I whistled in surprise,watching the wall pieces fall around. Impressive~ What was also impressive was how all the monks started scattering around frantically,calling for their leader,Chiriku.

Hidan:It doesn't look like these guys want to convert to the Jashin religion.None of these guys do... me:All the more sacrifices for you. Monk:That cloak...It's the rumored..No doubt about it!It's the Akatsuki! me:Oh hey,you're right.

Just then,a serious looking monk,Chiriku,started descending on the stairs.

Hidan:We have another virtuous looking one... Kakuzu:He's not just virtuous.He's also got a 30 million ryo bounty on his head in our Bingo Book. me:*whistle*Now that's a lot of money. Hidan:Hey...You're not after money,are you?You'll go to hell if you kill a monk for something like that. me:Wasn't it obvious though? Kakuzu:Money is the key that opens all doors.That's just what I want. Chiriku:I don't know what you guys want,but please leave quietly. Hidan:No meaningless slaughter,huh?But it doesn't work like that in my religion. Kakuzu:The Temple of Fire is the greatest Shinobi Temple in the Land of Fire.And it is said that all the monks control the special power known as the Gift of the Sages.And the 30 million ryo man is a Ninja who was once chosen as a member of the Guardian Shinobi Twelve who protected the Feudal Lord of the Land of Fire.And the proof is the breech-cloth with the Land of Fire emblem on it. me:I think I saw it before... Hidan:Oh,really?Is he that incredible? Kakuzu:Don't get careless.You'll die. Hidan:Don't give me that...!

With that,Hidan started charging forward,Kakuzu following his lead,as I stayed behind to observe his mysterious jutsu. As they approached the monk,he went in his stance,creating a huge holy aura that resembled a golden Buddha with infinite arms. The waves of holy light and chakra were radiating around him so much and in complete balance,that it hit me,being left awestruck at his technique. What is this exactly?!It's leaving me so confused at its holiness,it's amazing!

Kakuzu attacked first,going to punch Chiriku's face,but he got parried twice,and the holy Buddha suddenly became demon-like,as the infinite hands transformed into fists and started attacking him,making him fly and fall to the ground with a great thud. Same happened to Hidan. With a sigh,I approach those 2 and looked at their collapsed bodies.

me:You may be the immortal duo,but you sure don't like to analyze things.But it's good for me,I don't have to get beaten to a pulp,just to test the ground,like you guys do.

The monks started to chant happily "Lord Chiriku Won!" as the Demon Deity became peaceful once again,then fading away.The great monk maintained his fighting stance,while staring at me,trying to think of my future intent,as I smirked

Chiriku:Leave,and I will make their funeral. Hidan:Who would accept a different religion's funeral?I'd receive divine retribution from Jashin-sama...Now I'm mad...Hey...If this guy isn't a Jinchuriki,I can defend my commandments,right? Kakuzu:Do as you like,but his body is worth money.Don't go overboard,make sure his recognizable... Hidan:Exchanging life for money isn't something for people to do.Hey Kakuzu,stay out of this! me:I'd like to hear more about this faith vs money war,but I'm busy. Chiriku:Chiriku of the Temple of Fire will not lose to wicked man like you!*activating his Demon Buddha jutsu* me:Sorry but~I'm no man.

With that,I started throwing random kunais around the monk with a certain seal on each of them,so that I can travel in an instant to their location,and avoid the Buddha Punches. I'm not called the Red Death for nothing.All you see is red,before you die. Fast and swift,I take advantage that he doesn't move his position,and I travel from kunai to kunai,and throw explosive seals embedded with different elemental chakra power. Explosions have amazing destructive power,but what's better?Elemental explosions!

I create a Kage Bunshin and start to do different combos with her,like Fire and Wind or Lightning and Water. And since the immortal duo decided to fight too,in a matter of minutes,Chiriku was dead,the temple was in ruins and most of the followers were sacrificed to Hidan's God. Soon enough,we left for the Bounty Exchange Point closest to us,to get our well-deserved money. Although,that couldn't have been done without those 2 fighting over nothing...Both with words and with fists,but Kakuzu just can't be bothered with it.

At the Exchange Point,I was greeted with the familiar corpse smell and Hidan went out,annoyed with it.It might have gotten to his clothes... Oh well,it's not pleasant for sure. There,the man gave us the money suitcase and advised us to get rid of Hidan.Well,it'd be a wonder if we could. Before he could open the door to go outside,I stopped Kakuzu,by grabbing his wrist.

me:Better be careful,outside there are lots of shinobi outside. Kakuzu:Like that could bother us. me:Just saying...

He nodded at me,and when we got outside,Hidan was already in the midst of the fight with some Konoha shinobi. With that,he went to destroy the platform where the Shadow User was sitting,to break his jutsu,and as the other one with the Breech-cloth same as Chiriku came,also known as Sarutobi Asuma,high in the Bingo Book as well,told the other 2 to fall back,I jump next to Hidan,twirling around,making red Genjutsu butterflies appear around me as I giggle mischievously and I pull out the weapons from his torso.

me:Man,they hit your vital points on fleek~!Lucky you're immortal,or else,you wouldn't stand a chance.No wonder Konohagakure has the best strategists in the 5 countries~ Hidan:Man,that sure hurt like a bitch!Godamn,you're so going to pay for this! me:Too bad~!Good luck in this fight. Hidan:What?!You 2 idiots won't help? me:Nope.*twirling around to Kakuzu*Too bothersome,dealing with them.The boy is a genius,and Sarutobi Asuma is really strong.As you see,they work well together.Also...seeing you struggle is quite fun~! Kakuzu:You mess too much while fighting.You'll get killed. Hidan:Eh..!Like that's gonna happen!

They started fighting again,and Hidan didn't even bother to dodge the shurikens. Asuma managed to use his jutsu to catch Hidan in a great explosion. But it was too late for him.Hidan licked his blood,and most likely transformed.

me:Hey,Shadow user boy. boy:Huh? me:I'm sorry for your leader.It sure is a pity,this senseless fighting.This world is messed up.Fighting,killing,making wars,in their false pretext of gaining peace.There is no peace through war,there is only destruction and sorrow.Unfortunately,the Akatsuki is no different. boy:You sure remind me of someone I know... me:Who is it? boy:Uzumaki Naruto. me:*shocked*Wh-who...? boy:You know him? me:I-...I'm not sure...But we share the same surname... brunet:Oh,that's right.You're Uzumaki Shizuka.High on the Bingo Book,but also a well known assassin and bounty hunter. me:I do what I can to survive.Regardless...I'd love meeting an unknown relative. boy:*muttering*So there are sane people in the Akatsuki too...

After this,the smoke cleared,revealing a transformed Hidan,in his ritualistic circle,unharmed.Unfortunately,the jutsu backfired on Asuma,and now he has great burns on his body. Ouch...

Asuma's team wondered how did he get burnt,and I explained to them how the ritual works.Kakuzu started saying how this is going to be 35 million ryo more...I can't let him get his body too...not in this conditions... Hidan used his sharp metal pole and stabbed himself in the stomach and left leg,making Asuma fall on the ground. The other 3 were trying to figure out what to do to stop the tragedy from happening,and I see t he smart boy using a shadow jutsu,and I sent a butterfly above it,making more shadow for him to use and sent another to circle Hidan's ritualistic circle.Hopefully,this way he'll understand what to do.Concentrate,boy...

Kakuzu:If you don't kill them already,I'm going to do it myself.I'm not letting this money go. Me:Nooow now,Kakuzu...let's give Hidan a chance...right?Don't be rash... Hidan:Fuck off,Kakuzu!I can deal with these pussies on my own! me:You masochistic,ritualistic freak...

Come on,kid.Figure it out already.I know you can. His eyes widened and started slowly moving backwards,then his teammates asked him what was he doing,and he started explaining it all. That's it!He got it!I'm so glad...Kakuzu wasn't as happy though.Just thoroughly impressed by the boy's cleverness. He managed to get Hidan out of the circle,immobilized him,and Asuma cut his head...but in vain. Despite Kakuzu and I making fun of him,he wasn't done for.Just a talking head that surprised everyone.Kakuzu went to grab the talking head's hair and he kept complaining about the pain and other garbage. Please don't attack anymore... But just after trying to tell Kakuzu to go back to the HQ,he jumped faster than the eye could see and attacked Asuma really badly. Godamn...

me:Now,Kakuzu,don't bother to stitch him together...he's just going to be a pain.Let's just go.I can carry his body,no problem- Kakuzu:I'm not leaving without my bounty. Hidan went to finish his ritual and Kakuzu attacked the other 3.Me?I can't do anything.If I help the boy,I'll be called a traitor.Otherwise,I won't get the chance to see the Uzumaki boy. me:Kakuzu...Let them live.Hidan's already got your..um...bounty.Let's just go. Kakuzu:That heart of yours...is going to be the death of you. me:I'm fine with it.But please,let's just go!Let them mourn their leader in peace!

With that,more of their team mates started flooding the place,and we had to retreat. Finally. Kakuzu and Hidan weren't too happy about it,but whatever.And back at the HQ,I had a long talk with Kakuzu that ended in me promising not to get in with their 'meaningless slaughter'. But promises are made to be broken.And hopefully,Kakuzu doesn't hate me.He said he doesn't.He said I'm the only one he can really get along with. Sharing some common views,despite our differences,exchanging war stories and so on. He's like...90 years old,so he has really interesting stories to tell.Like how he was kicked out of Takigakure because he wasn't able to kill the Shodaime Hokage,Senju Hashirama. I also told him about my sister,Karin and how I had to run away from that village,because they were exploiting my mum thanks to the family jutsu,which contains being able to regenerate a person's health back,if they bite our flesh. Our mother died because of this,during war time.But I pride myself with letting being bitten only once,and that was to save a friend's life. In vain,though. From the information that I've gathered from Sasori and other reliable sources,he promised to help me get in contact with my sister and save her. Maybe he doesn't understand or feel it,but the 2 of us managed to form a bond that I haven't had since I met Gaara.

##########

During the last months,I managed to sneak out of the HQ

(being called the Akatsuki Ambassador by the Leader)

and met up with the Konoha and Suna shinobi,discussed fiery about alliances and mutual helping,I confessed my condolences for the casualties that occurred,like the Kazekage kidnapping,the death of a Suna elder and of Asuma.

It was a lot of negotiation,but I managed to make some sort of agreement between Konoha,Suna and the Akatsuki.

Glad that Tsunade and Gaara are more open-minded.

We offer them protection when needed,and they come to us for the most difficult missions and so on.More work,but also,more money and relations,which is crucial in these days.

One of the missions we had to do was kill some shinobi at the border of Kusagakure and Takigakure. Reason? Intel gathering. My partner? Kakuzu. Since Amegakure is a neighbour of Kusagakure,we arrived to our destination soon enough,without wasting much time,and chatting here and there. Target-spotted. No enemies in the next 5 km.I prepare myself for the Silent Kill Assassination,making my Genjutsu butterflies fly around the target,then sent a silent seal kunai behind the victim,teleported in a blink of an eye behind the target,and slit his throat,blood falling silently as he fell on the ground and I put the target in a transport scroll,handing it to Kakuzu.

me:Mission accomplished.That was quite easy,don't you think?I bet even a Chunin could handle this... Kakuzu:Too easy indeed...Behind you!

I turn around quickly and in the next second,I was flying away,hitting the tree that Kakuzu was in.Ouch,that hurts so much... Kakuzu:Shizuka,are you okay? me:A-alive...But that was a... -?-:A decoy indeed,dear sweet and smart Shizuka. me:Who...?How...? -?-:Already forgotten me?That's just plain sad. me:You are...! -?-:Indeed.Your team's squad leader. me:But how...?!I thought you were dead!I saw you die... Yuzuki:That power of yours that you have sure is amazing,Quite like your mother and sister,right?Like any Uzumaki,you have a tremendous life force,but that can also be stopped.Just like your mother did. me:She died for Karin... Yuzuki:Yes!Not for you!Because you abandoned them!You abandoned us all! me:I didn't mean to!I didn't want to die!I had to get them out of there,and I returned to get them back- Yuzuki:But it was too late.Your mother died,having her life bitten out of her.And your sister?With Orochimaru now.Nobody can get ahold of you.And now,there was you.Greatest bounty hunter,relations everywhere,then got involved as an Ambassador of the Akatsuki,making ties with Konoha and Suna...You were unreachable as well. me:That's why...You planned this mission...to capture me...and use me like they used her...? Yuzuki:There are so many wounded in the village,you couldn't begin to imagine.Your poor sister had bites everywhere.For such a small child,I was surprised she hadn't died the next day. me:No...I'm not tied to that village anymore...I'd rather die then let you do that! Yuzuki:*tsk tsk*But dear,you don't have choice.And not you,nor your partner can help you get out of this mess.But you should feel great.Kusagakure's martyr,dying to save the lives of so many others,so selfless,sacrificing her body... me:NO!NEVER!SHUT UP,YOU BASTARD!THAT'S NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN! Yuzuki:Watch me,kiddo.

With that,hundreds of shinobi started crowding my vision,but how?!I was sure I sensed no chakra in this radius!At this rate I'm really going to get captured...dammit! Kakuzu...even if I don't make it..he has to run away! I used my butterflies to explode around,dealing massive damage,then used lighting chain seals on people,and one little pink butterfly made its way to Kakuzu,telling him to run away and save himself. That was it. Despite our strength,there were way too many people to deal with.Accepting my fate,I tried commit suicide,but even that was in vain,as I felt a huge blow to the back of my head,letting me fall on the ground,motionlessly,darkness taking over me.

~~~~~2 weeks later~~~~~

How did Karin survive this pain?With each bite,it hurts even worse...to endure such abuse...poor mum...and to think I was foolish enough to fall in this trap...HIS trap...

Pain is the only feeling surging my whole body,arms,legs,neck...everything is pain and depression.

Everything is blurry,I can barely sense any presence,but I can hear them coming in the room,and feel their dirty hands and bites,and then they just leave me there,on the cold ground,my hands shackled,humiliated,the bottom underwear being the only cloth covering me.

The rest of my body is covered by bites anyways.

But it's fine. I can feel it.

Life is being drained away at a fast rate,and I will pass away soon enough.No more pain,no more sorrow,no more...friends...and...no more Kakuzu...

No,don't be so vain.They'll be fine without you.Comrades,friends,they all die,somehow,no big deal.And Kakuzu is immortal and has Hidan.He won't miss me.

I didn't realize how much I was wallowing in misery and self-pity until I heard war cries,shouts,explosions and other sounds from outside. It doesn't concern me much,since I'm in here,waiting to save those idiots once again.Maybe this time will be the last? Hopefully. With a sigh,I let the dizziness and half-consciousness take over me once again,as I let my head hang,my long red hair covering my face. Slowly,the door to my cell room was opened and I heard a thud in front of me,but I couldn't see or sense who it was. In a matter of seconds,my shackles were opened,and as I was falling forward,a pair of strong warm arms brought me close to them,letting me lean on their chest.

-?-:What have they done to you...

It was Kakuzu. Wait,am I dreaming? Is this true? Or did I die? Genjutsu? What is reality and what is dream? I cannot differentiate anymore...

Kakuzu:Shizuka...I let them do this to you...for so long...Don't die on me.Not today.I'm taking you back home and Tsunade will save you.I promise..

Having heard this promise,I managed a small smile and tried to mutter "Thank you",as darkness took over me. When I woke up,I was in a room full of light,making it difficult to open my eyes and see properly,this room seems familiar... That is the symbol of Fire... Konoha's Hospital room?

-?-:Good grief,I thought you wouldn't make it.Im glad you're awake. me:Sakura....chan...? Sakura:You can talk?That's a great improvement.But please don't force yourself,or the vocal chords might malfunction,or the muscles may strain. me:O...kay. Sakura:Also,you have a visitor.He hasn't left your side this whole time.Until...he had to chase the other one away.He was making too much noise...

Smiling at me,she left,letting Kakuzu enter back in the room.Unlike usually,his hoodie,mask,cloak and forehead protector were removed,letting the stitched face and brown long hair be shown.

Kakuzu:Finally awake,I see.*sitting on the bed* me:Thank you...Kakuzu... Kakuzu:No need for that.It was my fault you got caught.I couldn't save you. me:Shut up.

I put 2 fingers above his nose,where the brows meet.

me:Stop frowning.You'll get wrinkles,old man.

His face relaxed,letting a low chuckle,but then got serious again,one hand tracing me,from my face,my neck,to the waist,then let a 'tsk' sound.

me:20 years I thought so that I wouldn't have all these humiliating marks on my body,and one small mistake,and I almost die. Kakuzu:Tsunade said they will disappear in a week. me:So I'm going to hide for a week.Sounds fair. Kakuzu:You need to go out.Fresh air,the sun light and warmth...You need those. me:I can't go out like this.Plus,I can't walk on my own. Kakuzu:Mask or a scarf,jacket and regular pants.Those should do,should you feel uncomfortable with your body at the moment. me:I do... Kakuzu:I am here for you,until you get your full health and strength back. me:And after that?Will you still be here for me? Kakuzu:If you want me to,then yes. me:Then I do.I want to have you by my side.Always. Kakuzu:Then so it shall be.

manage to pull enough strength to raise myself and hug him weakly,having a small smile on my face,muttering another 'thank you'.He embraces me lightly,trying not to hurt me,and playing with my hair.

Kakuzu:If I ask you to,will you also stay by my side? me:Yes. Kakuzu:Why? me:Because I love you. Kakuzu:...What?

I smile bashfully,blushing and looking away,nodding softly.With a low chuckle,he put his hand on my cheek and made me look at him,then he smiled softly.

Kakuzu:That's good,because I love you too and I don't intend to lose you ever again.I don't want to outlive yet another youngster. me:Oh,dear-!Come one,don't say that!It makes you look like a paedophile...*giggles*But,you look great for someone your age,old man~ Kakuzu:Glad to know my appearance is to your liking. me:Not only your appearance,but you,in general. Kakuzu:If even someone like me can find love...you must truly be an angel. me:D-don't flatter me...I'm noone special... Kakuzu:You are.For the villages,for the Akatsuki...and for me,especially. me:Then...I'm glad. Kakuzu:Your loving heart and caring self is what makes you,you. me:You said it will be the death of me. Kakuzu:I was wrong.It will be the death of me.My cold self. me:So...you found something more important than money? Kakuzu:Not something,someone.Someone special,worth fighting and protecting.Someone I love.You.

Letting me slowly back on the pillow,he started kissing me softly,his hand still caressing my cheek,and mine in his hair,when I heard a gasp,followed by a curse,then yelling and a great thud on the ground.Looking out,we found out that Hidan wanted to see us,and was greatly surprised by our act of kissing and fell on a bush of roses with lots of thorns,all while cursing furiously.Well...That is a great sight to see.At least he won't bother us anymore~

Dear Kakuzu, I love you.

#naruto #imagine #akatsuki #kakuzu #shippuden #gaara #hidan #oneshot #naruto shippuden #pein #konan akatsuki #itachi #itachi uchiha #kisame #kisame hoshigaki #deidara #sasori #love

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