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#also look at this box art??? it’s so pretty???
mymelodyisme · 6 months
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Is this a repost? Yes. Do I care? Yes. Will this get 🚩? MAYBE.
*dabs violently*
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vargaslovinghours · 2 years
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It’s all fun and games until you get a bad ending
#💟#Doodles#Art#Scriabin#Edgar#Dating Sim#A solid mix of dialogue and UI this time lol#This time with the actual Affection symbol! Heart heart heart ♥ ♥ ♥ Haha#I didn't mention it in the UI sketchdump but one thing I've been thinking about A Lot is how the yarn in the text box might change over time#The more the affection grows the more the yarn stitches itself into a pretty pattern - visual evidence of you being laced nicely ♪#And though not shown here the inverse also being the case - not necessarily in losing stitches but if you grow a negative relationship...♪#Anyway!#Scriabin's was meant to look more like a spiderweb but I kinda like it looking like his bonewings more :D Self-expression and confidence!#I considered adding little gemstones or pieces of mirror as well - little facets of his personhood ♥#Edgar needed a flowery reaction as well so there he goes happy lad ♥#I like the contrast of him being more open and smiley if the interaction could be read as positive and platonic#As soon as love hearts are involved he gets more shy and nervous hehe#And then the last set ♪ Scriabin gets the ❌s this time hehe#Depending on how the player approaches Edgar as a topic to Scriabin he could take it well or poorly#The player trying to step into Edgar’s place is a losing battle and Scriabin is not into it#Even at high levels the player comparing themself to Edgar is not taken well only Scriabin is allowed to be clingy lol#It’s actually a soft rejection compared to what he could say#Coded language that basically says ''You're not nearly important enough to be acting like that to me so don't even think about it''#It'd be fun to see him go all out on the player if they weren't even at a point to be slightly polite to hehe ♪
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miss-mossball · 2 years
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alt outfits uvu
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nevsky · 2 years
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au.
#where kolya’s a painter and fyo’s a regular member of society.#this is not out of my personal fondness for paintings. this is not a way to relay all my favourite art techniques onto kolya. no.#kolya would probably somewhere post impressionism era. and her style clings to that but at the same time has this weird. quality that makes#it unfitting to any box.#like her. because she’s perfect.#mm i suppose she gets her recognition for painting things related to free will.#birds in cages. birds with injured wings. birds.#she just paints birds.#but they’re twisted. bodies are very convoluted the way she draws them. she makes it work though.#fyo doesn’t really know what she paints because she’s very elusive of it just like she is of herself.#or she’d paint clowns. something relating to the sad clown paradox.#i think if not for her own mental relation with the mind of a jester. she’d still like them for symbolism and all that. melancholy.#she also paints fyo. time to time.#fyo doesn’t know. but it’s always ‘unflattering’ paintings of fyo.#when she’s caught off guard or occupied with her thoughts. it’s always quiet when kolya looks at her and decides to paint her.#fyo’s imperceptible to herself. so she sees some of kolya’s paintings of herself and she sees what kolya sees.#which is a very intimate lens. she doesn’t know if she’s fine with that.#‘i see you have made me pretty.’ ‘i didn’t do anything. i just painted what i saw.’#either way. other people have assumed fyo was a model or some other person hired to pose.#i need to kill myself.#fyo.#kolya.
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iridescentblued · 17 days
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꒰୨୧꒱ — 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫 !
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꒰୨୧꒱ — 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: geto x afab!reader
꒰୨୧꒱ — 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 && 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: nsfw / 18+, minors and ageless blogs dni! geto is a college algebra math tutor && reader is failing, written in lapslock, geto is a tinie, TINIE bit of a perv (but we love him), not beta’d in any shape or form so please excuse mistakes, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, folks), piv, oral (f!receiving), use of pet names (kitten, angel, sweetheart), praise, reader calls geto ‘senpai’ until she doesn’t, size kink. wc; 8.5k
꒰୨୧꒱ — 𝒃𝒍𝒖𝒆 𝒔𝒂𝒚𝒔. . .  this is my first fic on this blog and also my first jjk fic in my entire life so please go easy on me aha i tried to keep it relatively tame, but based on my plans for the future, this will not be a trend sjfigjsfgj. reblogs and likes are greatly appreciated! ♡
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there wasn’t anything special about your case; at least, that’s what suguru had thought when he picked up your request before he met you. before he met you, you were just another student trying to demystify the painfully enigmatic art of getting through college algebra. before he met you, he had already tagged this case as another charity stint — a good way to get brownie points with the dean’s office and the mathematics and natural sciences department. in fact, thinking of all his tutoring cases as community service made them somewhat palatable, if not a little forgettable. he was quite sure, at the time, that you’d be in and out — both of the tutoring center and his memory. such was the case with most of his other tutees, anyway. 
he hadn’t expected you to be… well, you — a pretty little thing, with your sweet smile and your wide doe eyes. on the first day, you’d stood out; you’d arrived at the tutoring center’s lobby in a short dress, knit cardigan, and coquettish makeup, as if every fiber of your being were bidding the spring a solid farewell. multiple heads had turned, including his, as you came up to the front desk and asked for one geto suguru for college algebra. you were eager for summer, suguru had learned as you broke the ice little by little, in part because you looked forward to visiting okinawa with your family, but also because you were eager to get your first semester out of the way. that much, you had in common with most of his other students — almost all of the ones seeking help in college algebra only took it as a depressing core requirement of whatever degree they were doing. you, specifically, were focusing on fashion design; that very vividly explained your attention to your looks. this mathematics class was a thorn in your side, a mandatory thing that was simply supposed to get you through later business-oriented classes in your degree program. for suguru, however, college algebra had become the perfect excuse from the moment he’d laid eyes on you. 
the more time he spends with you, the more he thinks you’re exactly his taste. it starts off with little things he finds attractive, things he picks up while he’s watching you fill out the practice sheets he’s prepared for you on quadratic equations or while trying to get you to understand logarithms — your neat, tiny handwriting, almost like print; your habit of boxing your final answers in firm strokes, even if they’re hopelessly wrong; your colored tabs, cascading down the page side of your textbook. but as the weeks wear on, he sees all the little things in between — the way your long eyelashes quiver when you stop and close your eyes as you think for the answer, the upturn of your plush lips when you have the same answer on the practice sheet as he does, the deepening of your artificial blush with a natural hue when you realize you don’t know the answers to his gentle questions. he notices that you refuse to wear anything longer than a knee-length skirt despite the still-strong winds, notices that your tiny palms are always smooth and pink, that your hair always smells of coconut milk. these are things he can’t help but jot down in his memory — that was exactly what you were, after all: memorable. 
and the more he remembers about you, the more suguru wants you. yet he’s never made a move, never given so much as a hint of his interest, not only because there are prying eyes all around the building but also because you have never so much as shown a smidge of desire back. in fact, he has to wonder if you’ve ever thought of him in a different capacity — not as a tutor, but as a man. if you have, you’ve never made that obvious; you always talk to him respectfully, the little wall you’ve erected between the both of you remaining steady, and you never let your eyes linger on his face for longer than it takes for him to explain what you don’t know. suguru has had his fair share of female students, and in all of them, he’s seen the same kind of hunger — to few, he’s catered to their whims, if only to pass the time, if only for his own benefit. but you, with your ribbons in your hair and your sweet, sweet mouth, have never once shown that same kind of desire. 
he doesn’t know if it frustrates him, but he does know one thing — it makes him want you all the more. 
he wants you even now, as you sit across from him, dolled up as usual. even now, as your eyes take on a glassy sheen of defeat, your cheeks puffing out in the way that tells him you’re admonishing yourself once again, he craves you — maddeningly so. and he realizes that it doesn’t really matter if you're not the one to fall first, as long as he can still have you. 
“time out,” you beg, your fingers meeting the palm of your hand to signal a break. “my brain feels like it’s going to explode.”
“you just had a break ten minutes ago,” suguru reminds you, though there’s a lighthearted amusement to his voice that makes you smile sheepishly. “at this rate, you’ll be on more breaks than you’ll be taking the time to actually learn.”
“i’m trying,” you groan, your fingers curling against your forehead as you bump your head against your fist. “i just don’t think i’m cut out for this polynomial whatever — trial and error bullshit.” 
“you’ll hate me for saying this — but you’ll never know unless you keep trying.” 
“funny.” your sigh rustles the papers in front of you gently. “how do you do it, senpai?”
“hm?” 
“you’re not only good at this stuff, but you’re so good you’re able to take the time to teach people like me.” 
“strengths and weaknesses — it’s the natural way of the world.” suguru smiles gently at you, and he notes how his chest feels tighter when you return the sentiment shyly. “i could never do what you’re doing in your own degree, try as i might. anyway, you’ll get there. i won’t let you become my first ever failed project, you know.”
“i wouldn’t want to let you down either, senpai, but—” the back end of your pencil taps lightly against the surface of the table. “it just feels hopeless. i can’t focus on anything. it’s so… so abstract, and everyone here is talking all at once, and i don’t even know what i’m ever going to get out of this class in the long run.” 
even when you’re dejected, you look pretty; your bottom lip juts out naturally when you whine like this, and for a moment, suguru can’t say anything in response. he’s too busy wondering what your mouth would feel like on his — on him. when he snaps himself out of his brief reverie, he notices you’re looking around at everyone else — and he has to agree that with the noise level in this whole building, it isn’t the most conducive site for learning, especially when the learner is already so averse to the subject matter.
“i can’t help much in the way of it being too abstract,” he says kindly. “but it’s not a requirement for us to have our sessions here. i know it can be quite distracting, all these voices flying around, so why don’t you look for a place that better suits you, and we can start meeting there instead? the more comfortable you are in your environment, the better you’ll be able to absorb the material, i’m sure.” 
“you think?” your pencil comes to a slow halt as you refocus on him, a thoughtful light glimmering behind your gaze. “yeah — yeah, i actually wouldn’t mind that. then, i’ll look for a different place for us to meet, and we can start there next week. how does that sound?”
“whatever suits you suits me,” he responds easily. 
he lowers his gaze immediately after you flash him a blinding grin; there are far too many people here, as you both very well know, and if he keeps looking at you and your pretty little expressions any longer, he might just give them something to actually look at. 
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it had been your idea, not his, so why did suguru feel like he’d dragged you into a compromising situation?
you’d texted him over the weekend that your search for a new venue had been absolutely fruitless; every cafe and study space you’d been to was either too expensive or equally as packed with people, if not both. suguru had seen the preview to your message, but he hadn’t been prepared for what it read out in full when he’d actually opened it.
senpai, would it be too difficult to just meet at my apartment? i attached a map, so let me know!
it wouldn’t be too difficult; logistics-wise, it was walking distance from campus and almost directly across the train station he takes home. it also definitely promised an environment you were comfortable in, and you wouldn’t have to worry about excess noise from any other tutoring groups. no, the difficulty really only lied in himself — you two, all alone, would certainly mean his mind would be up to no good for the two hours every monday, wednesday, and thursday you would be together.
but for your sake, he’d try to rein it in, with the operative word being try.
your place is as neat and as pretty as you are; he doesn’t know if you’ve cleaned up for him, or if you’re naturally this organized, but he likes it all the same. it smells of toasted marshmallow and expensive perfume, and all your furniture matches. suguru supposes he likes that in a woman — someone able to care for herself, someone who cares about herself. and you’re always just as neat and pretty to match, with your hair always styled sweetly, your makeup always enhancing your features.
the problem is that now that he’s in here, where you live, and where you spend most of your time, suguru’s mind seems to wander too much towards thoughts about what you do in private. he rejects studying on the couch, not just because it’s bad for posture and concentration but also because he can’t help but imagine you pressed into the cushions by his hand. he suggests the small dining table you have, but on the second meeting at your place, he starts thinking about what you might look like seated on the table, your ass hanging over the edge and his face buried between your thighs. whenever you look up to ask him something, he drinks in your lovely, made-up face again, and starts wondering what your makeup would look like ruined before he interrupts that trainwreck of a thought with the answer to your question.
by the end of the week, suguru’s defenses are all but shot, and he realizes that this situation might be optimal for you, but it definitely isn’t doing him and his now constantly straining cock any great favors.
he supposes that your performance has somewhat improved; you’re less likely to trail off when you’re thinking and can actually do practice sets for a lot longer without all the noise and hubbub around you. your only real hindrance is yourself and your frustration; you have a habit of giving into your carelessness that sends you spiraling into despair, and it doesn’t help that when you press your cheek against the surface of your dining table and whine, the comfort suguru offers is noticeably delayed because he’s too busy thinking about his cock between your lips.
“my dad’s going to kill me if i fail this midterm,” you grumble, stabbing the practice sheet with your pencil; it skids sideways, and suguru robotically fixes it back into proper alignment for you, careful not to brush against the arm that’s folded inwards, supporting your chin. “he only agreed to let me take this degree because of the business aspect of it. as if i’ll need to know about—” you check the header of the worksheet. “domain and range when i’m doing actual design work.”
“you’ll never know what might be useful later on in life. i definitely thought this was nonsense back in high school — and then i got this job.”
“and now you’re rolling in dough?” you smile slightly. suguru chuckles.
“i’m a long way away from having myself a scrooge mcduck golden pool, but i make enough to get by very comfortably, thanks to this.”
“thanks to me, you mean.”
“you’re not my only student,” he snorts, pinching your elbow; you cry out exaggeratedly. “focus up. the hour’s almost over, and you should have finished with this much earlier.”
“can you leave it as homework?”
“not a chance.”
you blow out a sharp puff of air. “my mom used to do this thing where she’d give me rewards if i did well with my homework. i wish i’d still get something out of this.”
“what kind of rewards did she give you?”
“chocolates — candy, or sometimes we’d go out for milk tea together, if i did a particularly good job.”
“this is math tutoring, not a trip to the dentist,” suguru says, amused.
“a trip to the dentist would be more enjoyable,” you mutter under your breath, picking up your pencil and doodling an angry face next to the number you’re only halfway through solving. “this totally blows.”
“try to finish this before the hour’s up, and i’ll see if i can get you something nice. out of my own paycheck,” he stresses, prodding at your cheek to shift your attention back to the paper. he doesn’t miss the fact that your eyes light up, childish as the promise is.
he doesn’t know if that’s really what motivates you, but you do manage to finish the worksheet with a few minutes to spare before the clock hits seven, and that earns you some light, solo applause. it isn’t much by way of true praise, but you flush with pride all the same. suguru packs his things in silence as you get yourself a glass of water, and you see him to the door. only there does he notice your eager eyes, your expectant smile.
“what’s going through that pretty little head of yours?”
“are you really going to give me a reward? i did great today, you know,” you respond bluntly.
“you were serious about that?” he laughs.
“absolutely. i earned it.” you raise a slim finger, wagging it in his face. he trails it with his gaze, no shortage of amusement in his eyes. “next monday, i want something sweet.”
suguru takes in the sight of you, keeping your door open with your hip; he wonders if you know what you’re doing to him, what you’re asking of him — if you even know there’s nothing that could possibly be sweeter than you at this very moment. he drinks in the sight of your feigned haughty expression on your pretty features, the unnervingly low dip of your tank top, the tempting hemline of your shorts, and feels like you must be aware of what he’s going to do next.
“if it’s something sweet you want, you don’t have to wait until next week.”
he does it before he can think it through — surely, there’s nothing too harmful about a quick kiss? he angles your chin upward with his thumb and forefinger before you can even react to his words, and he tastes you like that for the first time. you’re just as soft and as sweet as he’d imagined, if not more so.
when suguru pulls away, you step back; there’s shock written all over your face, your mouth still hanging open slightly. your voice is gentle, shaky when you start speaking.
“senpai, wha—”
“see you next week. rest up over the weekend, or there’ll be consequences.”
he finds it easy to joke with you now, even after what he’s done — finds it easy to wave goodbye with nonchalance as he walks to the elevator, now that he’s gotten one thing out of his system. the look on your face, the growing blush across the bridge of your nose and your temples is indication enough for suguru to feel confident — if you hadn’t thought about him that way before, you were sure to spend the next few days doing exactly that.
it’s exactly a week before your midterm exam, and suguru notices you’re less than focused.
he’d let you stew over the weekend, not expecting much by way of communication; indeed, his phone hadn’t once been jostled by your texts. he’d taken that silence to assume that you’d been wrapped up in thoughts of the kiss he’d left you with, and you did not disappoint on that front; the next monday saw you fidgety, flushed, and constantly faltering in your words. you asked less questions, which normally indicated a problem, but today, he’d let it slide; you definitely had a little too much on that pretty little brain of yours.
he notices you’re still dolled up — your eyelids are shimmery, and your lips are glossy; you’re wearing a tennis skirt that hits all the right buttons for him, too. it’s true that you’re always pretty well-dressed and put together, but today somehow feels different. if before, suguru had always seen you dressed up simply to look good, today it feels a little more like you’re dressed up to look good for him. he knows it’s a little bit egotistical to assume as much, but he also doesn’t miss the side glances you throw at him when you think he’s not looking at you answering your textbook or the way your cheeks glow when you make the slightest bit of eye contact.
still, you try to focus as much as you can; it’s adorable, in fact, to see all your valiant efforts to appear unperturbed. he figures he’ll play along for as long as you will — what matters to him, after all, is that you’re in the game to begin with. you complain less today, focus on your worksheets, and suguru even manages to witness the sight of your forehead creasing up as you concentrate on a particularly difficult item. you’re adorable, in the kind of way that makes him want to pin you down and have his way with you.
you finish your work without a fuss today; you only actually asked for his help twice, which was a feat in and of itself. and again, when the session is over, you walk him to the door.
this time, when you linger, he waits; you’re clearly not good at hiding your true intentions, as it’s become clear you have something you want to say. as you try to piece your thoughts together, suguru reaches into his backpack’s front pocket and extracts today’s gift — an actual chocolate bar, albeit a rather run of the mill one.
“what’s this?” you ask, your thought process clearly derailed as confusion takes over your features.
“your reward. for a good job last week and today — you said you wanted one, didn’t you?”
“but i thought—” you stop yourself, your mouth opening and closing, suddenly wordless. suguru grins.
“not good enough? i picked that up from a convenience store on my way here, so it definitely isn’t anything special, but i thought it would at least be a good motivator.”
you’re turning red, and there’s turmoil in your eyes — he enjoys this, he realizes, the way he flusters you. if he had known this would be the result, he would have made a move much sooner. you shift your weight from one foot to the other, back and forth, obviously weighing out your options too. finally, you say, “alright.”
“you seem disappointed.”
“i’m not.”
“i’ll get you a better brand next time, if you really don’t like it.”
“it’s not that.”
“so what is it?” he doesn’t expect you to say it, and you don’t defy expectations; your bottom lip just quivers, and suguru chuckles low under his breath, stepping forward just past your doorway, just a little bit closer to you. “don’t tell me you wanted something completely different?”
you don’t say so, but he knows; he can tell by the way you tilt your head back, the way your lips part slightly, the gloss still trailing along the seam. he can tell by the way your torso arches just a little bit closer, almost like an accident. he can tell by the way your eyes bore into his, almost pleading.
“what you did last week…” you start, but your voice trails off into nothing soon after. he chuckles again.
“ah, that. i might have gotten ahead of myself.”
“was that all?” you press.
“and what would you do, if it wasn’t?”
“well — do you always like to play games?”
“i have a penchant for playing with my food before i eat it, if that answers your question.” he smiles down at your still-reddening face. “i was giving you a reward, as you wanted. i came up short on options then and there. you’ll let it slide this once, won’t you?”
“you did that just because i did well last week?”
“of course.”
“well, i did well today, too.”
“you did, and that’s why you have this.” he gestures to the chocolate bar in your hand.
“i don’t want this.” your voice is stubborn now, heated and frustrated, and you stuff the chocolate back into his hand. you must not like having to ask for something so blatantly — it’s too bad suguru wants to hear it in those exact words.
“tell me what you really want, then.”
you’re still unable to find the words, but your hands do the talking for you; they press into his shoulders and give you leverage to tiptoe until you’re just close enough to his lips. but you don’t close that gap, your mouth quivering only inches away from his, and oh, suguru wants to toy with you, but you’re just too irresistible this close to him. his warm palms press against your jaw, keeping your face steady as he closes the gap, and this time, he doesn’t just get a brief taste of you — suguru claims your lips with the thirst of a man who’s stumbled upon an oasis in the desert.
you must have thought about this moment long and hard over the weekend, because the nonchalant side of you that’s turned a blind eye to him is completely gone; he drinks in your soft noises and short, breathless gasps — all signs of your eagerness — until he’s drunk on the taste of you. the deeper the kiss gets, the less you can keep up, but you try, and suguru always likes rewarding your efforts, his wide tongue taut and flush against your tiny one in the sweet, warm cavern of your mouth. he licks every inch of it, leaves the mild nicotine taste of himself there, before he pulls away slowly. your eyes are still closed when he creates distance, fluttering open in a happy haze a few seconds later.
“good enough for you?” he murmurs, tucking a soft lock of hair behind your ear. you hum in assent through your dazed smile, and suguru knows he won’t be the only one looking forward to this coming wednesday.
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you’d done really well today.
suguru’s proud of you — prouder than he’s been of most of his students in his career here at the university, actually. you’d finally answered a worksheet almost perfectly, save for a couple of numbers where you’d forgotten to round up, and those things are absolutely negligible at this point (by his books, anyway). you’ve been on your best behavior yet, avoiding all forms of complaint, and he knows fully well why, but he won’t criticize you for your hard work all the same, no matter the motivation behind it.
in fact, you’ve done so good that he doesn’t wait until he’s about to leave to give you your sweet reward — which is why, twenty minutes before he’s meant to go, he’s got you on your couch, your legs spread, each one hooked over his shoulders.
truth be told, you’d been good way before the lesson had started; you’d answered the door in a crop top and the tiniest pair of shorts you’ve dared to wear yet — all clothes that you couldn’t yet wear outside yet, given the weather. selfishly, suguru is thankful for this fact, and if he had to list down other things he’s thankful for, just off the top of his head, it’s that you no longer meet in the tutoring center and that your apartment’s walls seem thick and well-reinforced.
“senpai, don’t tease me.” your silly little whining voice makes its first appearance of the day, but all suguru does is smile — it’s an almost wicked expression, set firmly between your thighs. “you said i did really well today. don’t tell me you’re backing out on rewarding me?”
“not at all, sweetheart,” he hums, pressing a small kiss to your inner thigh. he likes seeing you shiver at the contact, likes the way you’re chewing on your lip in what appears to be slight agitation. “just thinking of how much of a reward you deserve.”
in all honesty, suguru would like to take every bit of you now; you’re already so ready for him, anyway. he can smell the faint perfume of your arousal, can see the way you’re anticipating the most from him, and a part of him doesn’t want to deny you of that. the larger part of him has dreamed of burying his cock into you, anyway, and why wouldn’t he do that? but something also tells him to wait — or, rather, to make you wait, to make you want him just a little more.
and so, he decides.
his mouth finds your skin again, pressing kisses up your thigh; they get wetter, hotter as his mouth moves up, until his nose and lips are buried against your clothed core. you squirm in response, but his grip on your thighs keeps you relatively steady, even as his tongue presses against thin fabric. the wet muscle pushes sharp against your tiny entrance, the tip meeting slight resistance against your shorts and panties, but he finds a way, burying half his tongue in alongside damp cloth.
you’re already wet like this, and so needy that it might be possible for suguru to get you off just like this, still clothed, but the hunger in him spikes once you call out to him.
“senpai, please…”
with a groan, his fingers yank the fabric aside, exposing your pussy to the warmth of his breathing. it’s as pink, as pretty, as tiny as the rest of you, as fuckable as he’d imagined it would be, and he wastes no time in pressing his tongue flat against your folds, dragging it up in a wide, messy stripe; the muscle only tenses when it bumps against your clit, his tongue flicking upwards to tease it.
you’re so reactive, even at the slightest things — you whimper, you squeeze your eyes shut, you squirm. you’re begging to be fucked, and suguru’s cock is strained tight against his jeans, but your taste is so addicting that he can’t help but dive back in. his tongue eases between your folds now, spreading them apart until they’re lewd and sticky with his saliva, and the nub of your clit has grown so pronounced now — so pert and lovely that he can’t help but purse his lips around it and suck with excess force.
“senpai — f—fuck,” you mewl; you almost sound tearful. “f—feels so good…”
suguru wants to tell you how fucking good you taste, how beautiful the sounds you’re making are, but his mouth is too busy; his teeth rake down your cunt lightly, earning him a jerk of your hips, and he has to place pressure down on your thighs again to make sure you’re still enough for him to slip his tongue into your cunt.
he can tell even just by that how tight you’d be around him; your walls are warm around his tongue, and there’s a pressure against the muscle that tells him how good it’d feel for his cock to take its place. as if to simulate his desires, he presses his tongue deeper in, fucks you shallowly with its wetness until your whimpers become little sobs, broken and choked back. his thumb drags across your slit then settles against your clit, and he can feel the thrum of your pulse against the pad of his finger, beckoning him. he complies, easily, thumb tracing circles around the nub that start off slow, only for him to ramp up the pace alongside his tongue.
you’re easily at fault for that; the way you whine for him, call him senpai, tell him how good it feels over and over — why wouldn’t he want more of you?
he’s not sure which of you really earns the sweet reward today; you cum on his tongue, your cunt trembling against his mouth and your fingers threaded into his hair, but he’s the one who comes out licking his lips like he’s had the best treat of his damn life.
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come the middle of next week, suguru finds himself face to face with a test paper — one already clearly marked, with a number circled on the top-right corner. ninety. a stellar grade for anyone, and especially for you. 
you know it, and you look absolutely triumphant; you’re practically shining as you perch on your little dining table, your perfectly manicured finger jabbing at the score in emphasis. 
“flying colors, wouldn’t you say?” 
“color me impressed,” suguru replies smoothly, a genuine smile of pride tugging at his lips; he turns the page over, scanning your responses. you still draw your parabolas a little on the small side, making them a bit difficult to discern, and you’ve still got the habit of not rounding your answers up, but this is tremendous work, and he’ll be the first to praise you for it. “your dad must be filled to the brim with joy now, right?”
“i haven’t told him yet. you were the first.”
“well, i’m proud of you, sweetheart.” 
“proud enough to give me a reward?” 
he looks down at you in feigned thoughtfulness. here you sit, back in your little tennis skirt, looking up at him with hopeful eyes under those long, curled lashes. for someone who spent the first half of this semester acting ostensibly nonchalant, you’d very easily shown your true colors soon after — not that he really minds. in fact, he’s taken a decided kind of liking to how eager and willing you’ve come to be. 
“we’ve only just started our session, though,” he hums out, an idle thumb grazing his chin as he watches your expression turn from bright to cloudy, the beginnings of strategy darkening your gaze. it’s not like he wants to say no; he has no real intention to. but seeing you squirm in want makes him feel good about his decision to hold out a little longer — never mind the ache in his cock even then. “don’t we usually leave the rewards for a later time?” 
“i was thinking — since it’s the start of a new lesson —” 
“we wouldn’t want you falling behind from the start, would we?”
“i promise i won’t,” you pout. “i promise i’ll put in my best effort next time.” 
“next time? sweetheart, don’t tell me you’re thinking to get off scot-free today…” suguru trails off, his hand falling to the nearest surface it can reach — which, logic seems to dictate, is your soft, milky thigh. he feels you tense under his palm, and he bites back a smile, keeping his expression level. “i just don’t know.”
your small hands grip at the front of his shirt, and he hears you, for the first time, doing something he’s always wanted to hear you do. 
“please, senpai?”
how could he say no to you? he hadn’t really planned on it, had only wanted to see you do this, but it’s still too much and beyond his expectation — your misty gaze, your quivering lip. it’s almost laughable that you don’t think he’d notice the way you shift yourself so that his hand, still warm against your thigh, slides up your skin, the hem of your skirt bunched up in the junction between his thumb and forefinger.
suguru chuckles — isn’t this exactly where and how he’s always wanted you? “how could you ask me like that and expect me to refuse, angel? in that case, i have no real choice but to dedicate all our time today to your reward.” 
your breathing hitches — in anticipation, in desire, in excitement — as his hand continues its trail upward, deliberately now, fingers hooking into the waistband of your panties. his head dips down, rests into the crook of your neck, and he inhales the thick, sweet scent of your perfume, your shampoo, of you and all that he’ll take from you. 
“just remember, you asked for this,” he murmurs against your skin. “so i’m going to take every bit of you until there’s nothing left for anyone else.” 
you’re so willing, so ready even before he can get his full bearings; your hips are rising slightly off the table, and suguru feels like it’s you that’s telling him to move faster. he tugs down your panties, letting gravity take its course until they’re a tiny puddle of fabric on the floor, and he slots himself between your legs. like this, you have no choice but to spread, and you do so without hesitation, your knees locking against his sides as he pulls you in for a tight, hungry kiss. there’s that taste of you he loves, that clean, sweet buzz that draws him in, and his hands are bruisingly tight on your waist as he reclaims your lips. 
you already look dazed when he pulls away, which is always cute, but a little unfair — suguru wants you to be aware still when he takes you, and damn, if he doesn’t want to take you right fucking now. he kisses you again, harder and more demanding, as if willing your attention back to him, while his hands explore you — run up your thighs, fingers brushing against the plush curve of your ass. it’s not enough, not by a long shot, and he’s pushing the waistline of your skirt up your stomach with his hands, letting his warmth transfer onto your skin; he chuckles as your stomach sucks inward at his touch, just as you let out a gasp against his lips.
and he wants desperately to hear that noise again; in fact, he wants to know what you sound like in every capacity. his mouth works down your neck, pleased to find that suckling wet and languid on a spot just above your collarbone has you writhing and whimpering. are you sensitive or touch-starved? whatever the reason, he wants to draw all of that out of you, his hands drawing back down to hook under your thighs. suguru drags you to the edge of the table, until your bare cunt is flush against the front of his jeans, and he lets you feel him — a brief tease of what’s to come. 
“i’m s—so wet already,” you whisper, as if he doesn’t know — as if you know it’s exactly what he wants to hear anyway. “senpai, please, i need you.”
“not that,” he murmurs, his teeth grazing your collarbone as he speaks. “not senpai. suguru. call me suguru, angel.”
“s—suguru,” you exhale shakily, and it’s music to his ears — as if the last thing holding him back from you had shattered. 
“that’s it — what a good girl,” he purrs, his hips rocking forward against your pussy before they retract, leaving just enough space for his hand to slip between. slender fingers trail down your folds, sticky and slick. “you are all wet for me, aren’t you? ready to take me deep inside?” 
even the way you nod, a tiny movement of assent, drives him wild, yet a part of him still wants to test the limit of your patience, his middle finger stretching to circle your entrance. 
“wouldn’t want to shock your tiny little pussy, though, would i? will you let me stretch you out first, kitten?”
“yes,” you mewl, sounding almost tearful. “anything— anything, please.”
suguru drinks in the long, drawn-out keen you set free when his digit sinks into you; he’s already felt your walls against his tongue, but a small part of him is still surprised at just how tight you are. that same part nags that he might not fit easily into you, but whatever that voice is is easily drowned out by a more assertive promise — he’ll make it fit. 
“can’t tell you how much i’ve wanted to feel your pretty little hole around my cock,” he presses on, his finger pushing deeper in; he feels you tense a delicious kind of tightness, as if it’s almost too much for you. is it? “ever since that first day you came into the tutoring center, dressed up all cute — did you do that on purpose, sweetheart?”
“yes,” you admit, breathless; the syllable is lengthened into a weak moan as suguru pumps his finger into you, slow, deep strokes that tease your tacky walls open. “wanted — wanted to make a good impression…”
“and you did, didn’t you? kept looking so sweet for me, so pretty every single time — got me thinking about all the ways i wanted to have you. got me so fucking hard every time we’d meet — is that what you wanted?”
suguru doesn’t give you much room to respond, but he can make his own answers to appease himself anyway; he reclaims your lips, already eager for another taste of you, and you comply with the same amount of desire, your soft whimpers melting against his teeth. in the space of pseudo silence, wet, messy noises, he manages to tease another digit into you, and you cry out against his lips as it pushes in, joining the first in how deep it reaches. he absorbs that too, takes in every minute sound you make, relishes the way you pulse around his fingers. even without the noises, he can tell your pleasure’s heightening, with the way you clench around him, your hips rocking pitifully as you’re eager to rut against his palm. 
“look at you now.” he’s selfish, but he doesn’t care — he wants to ruin you, and if the telltale squelch of your cunt as he fucks his fingers into it isn’t indication enough, then the way your mouth hangs open as he pulls away, letting his name fall freely from your lips, definitely is. “legs spread, all desperate to feel good for me. what a needy little kitten you are. this good enough for you, angel?”
you shake your head, only to squeal as he pulls you closer, his fingers shoving deeper into you; your hips are re-angled, allowing him to brush the pads of his digits against the rough, sweet spot, and he feels triumph bloom in his chest as you throw your head back, teary eyes squeezed shut.
“no, no, no,” you babble, and he can see the bob of your throat as you swallow hard, clutching at sense to make words. “want — need your cock, want to cum on your cock so badly, suguru — want you to fuck me, stretch me open, please —”
“greedy, aren’t you?” he murmurs, leaning in to nip at the spot he’d left reddened above your collarbone. “go on then — show me how much you want it. show me what a good girl you are, and cum on my fingers.” 
“but—” 
“come on, angel,” he urges above the squelching noises, increasing surely in volume. his fingers meet resistance when they spread apart inside you, but all it does is create a delicious friction that has you squirming in his hold. “don’t hold back. let me see you fall apart.” 
and you do, so prettily, your eyes rolling back and your voice unrestrained. suguru’s fingers ride you through your orgasm, pumping deep and steady despite how slick you’ve gotten, your juices coating his hand and wrist. he watches the flush rise to your neck, stopping at your cheeks, watches the heaving of your chest, the shine of your skin from a thin sheen of sweat, and he doesn’t want to let you come down from this high, but his cock is aching — practically bursting from his jeans — and all he can do is make the silent vow that the next time you look like this, he’ll be balls deep in you. 
“that’s my girl,” he coos gently, watching the tension slip from your shoulders; his free hand is at the small of your back quickly, easing you down as your torso falls back, and you’re laying on the table. “pretty little thing, aren’t you? cumming so sweetly for me.” 
“suguru,” you groan out weakly, your tiny hand clasping around his wrist. “cock — i want your cock, please—” 
“can’t wait?” he’s indecent for sounding amused, but even that does nothing to stay his arousal; how eager you are simply makes him want you all the more. “okay, angel — since you asked so nicely.” 
a slight twinge of disappointment runs through him as he pulls his fingers out, but it’s quickly buried by the feeling he gets once he gives you a clear sweep of a once-over; how slutty you look, still half-dressed but already half-ruined, your thighs shaking in an effort to keep them open for him, the remnants of your last climax still leaking out of your hole. the sight of you has him so distracted that unbuttoning and unzipping his pants feels like a fever dream of an act; he barely notices what he’s doing until he’s already bare in front of you, and alertness has crawled halfway back into your consciousness as you push yourself up on your elbows to look at him.
“it’s so—” you have the decency to blush, though there’s a pleased look on your face that tells him you’re not really embarrassed. “i didn’t think you’d be this big.” 
“does that worry you?”
“i’ve never had anyone… this big.” pride blooms in his chest — good, he thinks, because if he can’t be as memorable as your first, then he’ll take being the most in something as a prize. “i don’t think — will it fit?”
“does it matter?” he chuckles, and your blush deepens. “no matter what — you’ll take all of me in, won’t you?”
you chew on your bottom lip, as if considering your options, but to suguru, there’s really only one choice — the correct one, and you make it when you nod your head. 
“it’ll feel good, though, you know,” he muses. his hand wrapped around his base, he lines himself up with you, the tip grazing against your folds. “even better than just now.”
with just a little more pressure, he has his shaft flush against you; his girth sits against your slit, the tip pressed against your clit, and he starts to rock his hips — into his fist, against your cunt. your hips quiver, and a shiver runs through you as your pleasure spikes again, but he can tell it isn’t enough. your bottom lip is back between your teeth, and your eyes are flitting between his face and his cock. suguru reaches out, eases your lip out from between your teeth, strokes it gently, almost tenderly. 
“say it,” he commands in a soft, silky voice. 
“fuck me, suguru,” you breathe out, barely missing a beat. “fuck me, fuck my pussy, please.”
and if you ask that desperately, he’ll waste no time; he draws his hips back, dragging his cock down until he’s aligned with your entrance. his eyes are trained on your face, even when he pushes in, so that he can take in your expression — the widening of your eyes as his tip breaches the first wave of resistance, the way your mouth falls agape as his fingers dig hard into your flesh. he’s never seen a prettier sight in his life.
“stretched you out already, but you’re still so fucking tight,” his voice is a soft, melodious croon, a stark contrast to the way he’s forcing past your tightness. “tight and wet, like a good girl.” 
“so big,” you whimper, your fingers stretched far enough to tickle the front of his shirt. “can’t — can’t take it.” 
“of course you can, angel.” suguru doesn’t give you the time to brace yourself fully before he’s rocking his hips in a little more sharply, his cock now halfway into you. your fingers curl into a little fist, immediately flying back to block the noise from your mouth. “ah ah. don’t get shy on me now; you’ve been so noisy for me all this time.”
but he doesn’t really mind the way you clap your palm over your mouth to muffle your high-pitched squeal as he thrusts in fully, the adjustment period after the last movement close to nothing; he’s too busy focusing on how good you feel around him, how warm and wet your insides are. this is heaven, easily, and suguru wants to stay here for as long as he can. 
“god, you’re fucking tight,” he repeats, an appreciatory gaze running over where you’re joined. his thumb stretches over your folds, rubbing them — something of an apology, perhaps, although all it does is stimulate you more, and you shiver at the extra contact. “how deep is it, baby?”
“can feel you here,” you mumble out, your small hand pressing just above your pelvis. he feels the tightness multiply as you place pressure, even just for a moment. “your cock’s so much deeper than anyone else.” 
your hand falls away, limp, as he draws his hips back; you inhale, long and deep, before letting it out as a broken moan when he pushes back in. it drives him crazy, to start off this slow, when all he wants is to find a pace that has you sobbing, but the resistance of your pussy against his length isn’t easy to ignore. suguru works you open, his jaw set and his grip tight against your frame, and it isn’t long before he’s picking up speed, the slap of his flesh against yours fueling him exponentially, mingling with your cries, steadily increasing in volume. 
“that’s it. let everyone hear you,” he eggs on, his thumb now circling tight around your clit; your legs are quivering, threatening to close, but he keeps you steady, one arm wrapped around your thigh. his thrusts grow rougher, more deliberate, and when he looks up from where you’re joined back to your face, he sees your expression as a mixture of incredulity and ecstasy. a thin line of drool hangs from the corner of your mouth, your pretty pink lip gloss smeared, and fuck if he doesn’t want to make sure you look like this every single time he comes over. “let them know who’s fucking you good, angel.”
“su— suguru!” your voice hitches, lilts up as he presses in at a different, deeper angle, and he almost cums right then and there from the way your walls pulse around him. “your cock feels so good, fucking me just right— more, god, more—” 
he complies without hesitation, gathering both your thighs and pushing them closer to your chest; you look even lewder like this, folded in half with your sopping cunt presented to him like it’s all his to take, and it is, isn’t it? there’s an increase in the intensity, the vigor in which he pumps his cock into you, and he knows he’s brushing repeatedly against your spot by the way you’re blubbering his name out in a way that suggests you sincerely think no one else in this building can hear you. 
“that’s my girl,” he hums approvingly, though there’s a thickness in his voice that has him sounding a little more strained. “such a good girl, with your cunt all nice and sloppy for me. do you like it when i go this deep? does it feel good when i fuck you where no one else can?” 
“yes!” you sob out, your hands crumpling the end of your skirt up into tight fists. “suguru, i— cum, i need to cum again, please—”
“i’ve got you, kitten,” his tone is reassuring, a stark contrast to the rigor of his hips. “don’t have to hang on for me, you know; always love seeing you fall apart.” 
“m’close, so close, closecloseclose—” 
“let go, then,” he urges, his blunt nails digging into your flesh. “let me feel that sweet cunt cum on my cock.” 
you comply without hesitation, though if you’d done it willingly, he can’t really tell; he has to pin your hips down to stop you from bucking up and causing him to slip out, and you writhe against him as you sob in ecstasy, your walls fluttering before they clench. stray tears leak from your eyes, squeezed shut, and suguru wants nothing more than to eat you up like this — broken, fucked out. 
you’re not even fully down from your high when he feels it — that sudden wrenching in his gut that tells him he’s about to follow suit. with a low groan, he peels your thighs apart again, lets you watch him as he bullies straight into your leaking hole. your voice is a staccato, punctuating every deep, sharp thrust into you, and it’s exactly to that melody that he wants to get off. 
“tell me where you want it, angel.” he doesn’t trust his voice, sharp and short as it is now. “should i mark your pretty face? your stomach?”
“want it against my pussy,” you whisper out, and suguru almost loses his mind as he watches you spread your folds apart with your forefinger and middle finger, inviting him. “make a mess of it, senpai.”
he’s barely able to pull out before he’s spilling against you; he ruts against your slit, coating your folds and the insides of your thighs in thick, creamy white. you hold your legs apart for as long as you can until they start to tremble, and he catches them and gently eases them down. 
when you sit up to kiss him, you’re still demanding; he feels your hips rock closer, your sticky cunt pressing against the underside of his cock.
“not enough,” you murmur against his lips, and suguru chuckles as you bind your hands around his neck. 
“don’t worry, kitten,” he hums back. “we’ve got all afternoon.”
2K notes · View notes
gyu-effect · 4 months
Text
i’ll marry you with paper rings || k.mg
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“AND I’LL MARRY YOU EVEN WITH PAPER RINGS”
PAIRING || Mingyu x Female Reader
GENRES || Best Friends To Lovers AU, Fluff, Angst, Childhood Friends To Lovers AU, Slow Burn, Love Triangle (not exactly), Marriage Pact AU, Humour
SUMMARY || When the two of you were little, you and Mingyu had made a marriage pact, agreeing to marry each other if both of you remained single till thirty. Of course, it was just a joke between the two of you and you both went about in your own ways, the silly promise pretty much forgotten. You soon had a huge list of ex-boyfriends and it became a routine for Mingyu to be your human tissue after each breakup. It was a tiresome job, taking care of you, but if the said best friend in love with you didn’t do it, who would?  
Or, in which, even twenty years later, Kim Mingyu finds himself running to your every beck and call, despite telling himself he won’t fall for you anymore.  
WARNINGS || minors dni, swearing lots of swearing, alcohol consumption, wonwoo is an ass (sometimes), mingyu’s friend circle bullies him because what even is new, reader has a obsessive ex, down bad gyu (and yes this is a warning), switch!mingyu, switch!reader, soft sex its more of making love so there aren’t really any dynamics, unprotected sex (do not do this), pet names for both (love, baby, angel, princess, sir), riding, sofa sex. [let me know if i missed anything pls]
WORD COUNT || 28.3k (what happened here-)
A/N || OMG ITS FINALLY HERE. AFTER 8 MONTHS OF TURMOIL, 8 MONTHS OF HATING IT AND LOVING IT, HAVING A WRITERS BLOCK AND CRYING OVER IT ITS FINALLY HERE. This was a huuuuge journey to write this and I hope you guys enjoy it because this fic is truly my baby that I raised. Special thanks to @wonumatics for helping me with the fic (and also making a cameo) and @thepoopdokyeomtouched​ .
TAGLIST || @alyssng​ @shiningstar-byulxx​ @ashkuuuu​ @venusprada​ @macaronihaha​ @jyiiscool​ @sanniekook​ @obaebarbs​ @springdaybreaks​ @just-here-to-read-01​ @hoshipills​ @jhornytrash​ @jeonnyread​ @zgzgzh​ @neuviloved​ @hoeforcheol​ @sahazzy​ @lightprincess-world​ @watermelon-sugars-things​ @idubutily​ @meowmeowminnie​ ​@raindroponme-onme @nishloves​ @cosmic-w0lf​ @gyulfriend​ @youre-on-your-ownkid​ @neocarat17 @bias-recs​ @bmkgemz​ @fragmentof-indifference​ @peachytokki @hanicore​ @winterbeartaehyungbestboy​ @toshijimafarms​ @hyneyedfiz​ @weebotakuboy​ @angelfeverdream​ @aaniag​ @thepoopdokyeomtouched​ @caramyisabitchforsvtandbts​ @sea-moon-star​ @jjeongddol​ @k-drama-adict​ @mnstxmnbb​ [if you want to be added to my taglist please fill in this form!]
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𝐎𝐍𝐄. 𝐏𝐀𝐏𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐒
“Mingoo.”
The boy ignored your words as he continued with his drawing, hoping you would stop calling him and get back to your own work. The two of you had been drawing and colouring since morning so it wasn’t really surprising to him that you were already bored, but his art teacher had claimed that he wouldn’t be able to draw well since he was left-handed and he was determined to prove her wrong. 
“Mingoo. Mingoo! Look at me!”
‘Mingoo’ looked exasperatedly at you, clearly unamused by your antics. You had placed the entire colour pencil box on your head, balancing it as you tried climbing up the arms of the sofa where the two of you were seated. No sooner had you lifted a leg, your whole body shook and the pencil box came crashing down, spilling its content everywhere.
“Hey!”
You had begun to laugh but immediately stopped when you saw how upset he was. Sitting down beside him, you gave him a sad pout as you gently patted his back.
“What’s wrong, Mingoo?”
“I told you not to call me that! Just call me Mingyu!” He huffed, going back to his drawing.
You rolled your eyes but you were sure he didn’t even notice it, considering how immersed he was in his drawing. “Fine, Mingyu. Just so you know, Mingoo is much cuter! What’s bothering you?” 
Mingyu didn’t respond right away, which just confirmed your suspicions that he was very, very upset. And when he did look at you finally, his lower lip was quivering as though he was on the verge of tears.
“My- my art teacher told me I can’t draw!” The very first tear drop fell as he sniffled, trying very hard to control his tears. You looked at him confused, not sure what he was talking about since Mingyu was clearly the best artist you had seen in your life (however short it was).
“What are you talking about? Why can’t you draw? You draw amazing.”
“She said since I’m a leftie I can’t draw!”
“That’s because she is just jealous that a six year old draws better than her. I think you are the best artist I’ve ever seen.”
“You haven’t even- you haven’t even seen that many artists.” Mingyu mumbled, rubbing his eyes as he felt the sadness in his heart reduce a little. You rolled your eyes once more (he had come to notice that you seemed to really love rolling your eyes at him) before poking his cheeks once.
“Don’t need to. I just know you are the best.”
“Really?”
“Mingoo.” This time he groaned at the nickname. “I think you are the best at everything. You are the best person I’ve ever met.”
“You are just six. You couldn’t have met that many people, could you?”
“You are underestimating my social skills. But the point is, according to me, you are the bestest person I know, and that’s why you are my best friend.”
He snorted. “It sounds like you are convincing me to get married to you.”
You gasped at that, and for a second Mingyu was worried he had said something scandalous (it didn’t feel right to him that you would be troubled by this when you used the word ‘idiot’ many times, which was a pretty bad word according to his mom). 
“That’s it!” You clapped your hand in excitement and something told Mingyu you were going to suggest the most scandalous thing he had ever heard from you. “Let’s get married!”
“Like…now?”
“No, you idiot!” He winced as you slapped his arm lightly, though he wasn’t sure if it was because you hit him or because you had sworn again. Maybe it was time to tell your mom that you were always using bad words. “We can’t get married now, so if we are still single till thirty, let’s get married then!”
“W-why, though?” He asked, rubbing his arms gently. Not that he was opposed to this idea. Mingyu thought you were a great friend, you were his best friend after all, and to be honest, in his eyes you were pretty enough (he didn’t have much girl friends unfortunately). But he wasn’t sure why you had suggested this idea suddenly.
You just shrugged. “No reason. It’s just that I’ve seen many movies where the best friends get married because no one wants to marry them.”
“They sound desperate to me.”
“So will you be, if you don’t get a girlfriend by thirty.” You snickered and that got Mingyu actually wondering. Would he actually never get a girlfriend? Now that he thought about it more, he realised that maybe your plan wasn’t that bad. 
“Sure then. Let’s get married if we are still single by thirty.”
You raised your pinky finger to him and he immediately entwined it with his, both of your thumbs brushing against each other as you smiled at him, causing him to mirror your grin.
“Pinky promise that we’ll get married if we are still single when we reach thirty?”
“Promise.” He whispered.
“Oh, by the way, Mingyu?”
“Hmmm?”
“You are going to be the world’s greatest artist.” 
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Mingyu rotated the pen in his hand as he absentmindedly stared outside the window. He could faintly hear the teacher teaching something about the different divisions in the animal kingdom but he had no interest in it whatsoever (after learning about the different excretory systems of insects, he had lost interest in biology all together). Through his seat, he could see the school ground and being on the lower floor didn’t help the fact he could recognise all the students who were playing out right now, making him wish he was there instead of his current location inside the sweltering, hot classroom. 
No one had warned him that middle school would be this boring but after being put in different sections, his school life seemed to have considerably dulled without you. Seventh grade wasn’t supposed to be this lifeless, was it?
He could see your little running form going in circles around the field and he automatically felt a smile tug at his lips. You looked so funny, with that annoyed expression on your face as you struggled to complete your laps. Mingyu dearly wished he had his camera with him, just to click a picture of you in this haggard form and pin it up in his bedroom wall just to tease you.
Just as he was thinking of the million different ways he could embarrass you, he heard his name being called sharply, snapping him out of his train of thoughts.
“Kim Mingyu!”
He jerked up straight to see his biology teacher glaring daggers at him, hand clutching the duster as though he was ready to throw it on Mingyu the second he answered the question wrong.
“Er,” he stood up awkwardly, eyes darting to the board to search for anything, just anything related to the question, anything that would give him enough hint as to where they were.
Suddenly his eyes landed on Boo Seungkwan who was sitting on the first bench, the extremely talkative boy Mingyu had recently befriended, and to his relief, Seungkwan mouthed him the question.
What are the four divisions of phylum arthropoda?
“Uh right, um, arthropoda is divided into arachnida, myriapoda, insectae and crustaceans.” 
The teacher looked slightly annoyed that he had got it right but nonetheless motioned Mingyu to sit down. Letting out a silent sigh, he sat down and looked out of the window, searching for you. His eyes immediately landed on your figure as you and your friends stood in circles for dodgeball, causing him to smile once again knowing you were horrible at the game.
It was funny to him how easily he always noticed you even amongst a huge sea of students. He was always the first one to catch your eyes at the morning assembly and he could always spot you in the canteen during lunch despite the huge strength of students. It was like you stood out the most amongst everyone, and yet at the same time, there wasn’t really anything that special about you.
Thank god he remembered this chapter though he had studied this almost five days ago. Mingyu had finally come to believe that he had, what you called, a ‘sexy brain’. It kind of embarrassed him how much you always threw that compliment around him whenever the two of you were studying, but for some reason he didn’t stop you. 
He just liked it a lot when you complimented him.
The bell finally rang after what felt like hours, indicating that it was the lunch break. Mingyu turned towards the window to see you disappearing into the school building one last time, before he began packing his books into his bag.
“Dude, why do you stare out of the window so much?” 
He looked up to see Seokmin leaning on his desk, his usual gentle smile on his face as he waited for him to answer. Mingyu could see the curiosity behind his eyes so he just shook his head.
“No reason. It’s just better than studying bio, to be honest.”
“Oh, yeah?” He asked, peeping out of the window too. Seungkwan came and joined the two of them, having overheard the conversation. “Are you sure it isn’t to just check out the section A girls?”
For some reason, Mingyu felt heat creep into his cheeks as he glared at the smiling boy opposite to him, who was already laughing in a good natured way.
“Then what?” Seungkwan snorted. “His best friend is in that class.”
“Oh? What’s her name? Then you must be mad that the two of you got separated last year, right?”
“It’s Y/N. Of course I’m mad.” He huffed, frowning at the very memory. His school had suddenly decided that from middle school girls and boys would be in completely different sections. He remembered whining about this to you because what was the point of studying in a co-ed school if he was separated from his best friend for silly reasons to which you had gently reminded him that you would be meeting at the canteen nonetheless. “Won’t you be angry if Joshua got put in a separate class, Seokmin?”
Seokmin laughed once more. “Of course I would. But you look like you are ready to set the school on fire for this.”
“You see,” Seungkwan spoke and Mingyu could already tell he was trying to add fuel to the fire from his expression. “They both are really close. So of course Mingyu was pissed.”
To this, Seokmin widened his eyes at Mingyu dramatically, clearly intrigued by this new piece of gossip. “Oh? Is that so?”
“It’s not what you both are thinking.” Mingyu said firmly, finally zipping his bag shut. But one look at Seungkwan and Seokmin’s mischievous smirk was enough to tell him that he had dug his own grave.
“And what are we thinking, Mingyu?”
“You think I have a crush on her.” He said, his nostrils flaring. Mingyu could feel his ears turning red from the embarrassment but he wasn’t really sure why. What was so embarrassing about explaining his relationship with you, his best friend, to his friends? “Or that we might like each other. But we don’t. Not like that.”
“Uh huh whatever you say, lover boy.” Seungkwan giggled before beckoning them to get out of the classroom. Mingyu rolled his eyes as he followed his friends out but it did nothing to stop his ears from burning up. Why was he so flustered?
The canteen was as usual crowded and the three of them lined up with their trays to get their food, when he felt his elbows hit someone else.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” Mingyu began, sure that his clumsiness had gotten him into trouble once again. But luckily, he was met by your annoyed expression (he never knew he could feel so much relief upon seeing you annoyed) as you rubbed your ribs gingerly.
“Watch where you’re going, boy. You could easily have taken off my head with that elbow of yours.”
Mingyu snorted at your words, secretly glad that he was finally able to catch up with you in the canteen. “I bet I could. After all, who gets tired after running three laps?”
“You were watching me?” You hissed, pretending to lift your tray to hit him. He laughed at you and felt his smile grow as you too smiled back at him.
“He was watching you the entire time.” Seungkwan said. Mingyu glared at the two of them but that didn’t stop Seokmin either.
“Yeah, nearly got into trouble too, because of that. Thank god you knew the answer or else Park would have had your head for lunch today.”
“You weren’t listening to Park? You must have a death wish, Gyu.” 
All of a sudden Mingyu felt his stomach flip, causing him to stumble a little, his plate (now filled with food) nearly falling off his hand if it wasn’t for Seungkwan catching it with a hiss. 
“What’s wrong with you?” He hissed, carefully pulling Mingyu away from the crowd. The four of them looked at him concerned and he realised he must have looked shell shocked or something, seeing that they weren’t scolding him for his clumsy habits like usual.
To be honest, he felt shell shocked too. What was that? What was that sudden feeling that nearly threw him off his balance? When you had called him Gyu (Mingoo had evolved to Gyu because even you finally agreed; it was cringe), he had felt his stomach drop like he had been dropped from a great height. You had called him Gyu countless times before, and none of them had ever had such a dangerous effect on him before.
“Mingyu?” He heard your soft voice call him, and when you placed a gentle hand on his arm he turned to look at you. You were looking at him worriedly, and for some reason that made him feel even more light headed.
He felt the familiar heat rise up his cheeks and he immediately turned away, not wanting to look at you anymore.
“I- I think I need to go to the nurse’s room. I think I’m a bit dehydrated.” he said, deciding that he must have been feeling unwell. What else could be the reason for this sudden feeling? It was very hot after all and they did have an hour of physical education before biology. Maybe he hadn’t drunk enough water?
“Oh, okay. Let me come with you-” You began but he cut you off with a smile
“No, I’ll go alone.” 
You looked taken aback for a second, but smiled back almost immediately, giving his arm a gentle pat. “Are you sure? What if you faint on the way?”
“No, I’m not that unwell yet. It’s okay, you guys have lunch. I’ll catch up with you later.” Nodding at Seungkwan and Seokmin, he quickly ran out of the cafeteria, hoping no one was using the ice bag from the nurse’s room. 
Now that he was finally away from the suffocating heat and loud buzz of the cafeteria, he wondered why he had refused you to take him to the medical room. 
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“Crap. How many days left for cram school to start?” You asked, stuffing another handful of popcorn into your mouth. Your best friend looked at you in annoyance for asking the most useless question in between the movie, but nonetheless picked up his phone to check the date.
“Two days. It starts this Saturday.” 
“Fuck, we’ve really got to make the most out of it Mingyu.”
“I know. But you repeating it after every few minutes isn’t really making it better or making the day go slower. If anything, I can already feel the anxiety seeping in.”
He heard you snort and mumble something about having it easy because of his sexy brain, and he felt a smile tug at the corner of his lips. The two of you were finally in high school, but there was nothing to rejoice about it by the number of extra classes you would have to attend. So here you were, idling away the two week summer vacation you had got, enjoying the ‘last glories of our youth’ as you had called it.
Even though Mingyu knew the next four years were going to be a huge study overload (he could actually feel the anxiety seeping in now), he had never felt so relaxed in his entire life like he had in these two weeks.
The two of you had gone to amusement parks, done movie marathons and had even gone to the beach for a few days with both of your families. Even though he knew spending time with you was supposed to be memorable, he couldn’t help thinking that this time it had felt extra special.
He still couldn’t forget that warm feeling that had enveloped his chest when you had won one of the amusement park games and hugged him out of excitement, or the time when the two of you kept pushing each other at the sea until a huge wave crashed into the two of you, causing you to hold onto Mingyu as you both let out shrieks of laughter.
All of a sudden he realised that he had been getting this feeling of warmth whenever he was around you quite often off lately. Not to mention that one time his stomach dropped when you winked at him back at your fourteenth birthday. 
Well, in his defence you looked gorgeous. Like in a way he hadn’t expected you to. Of course he knew you were pretty. Kim Mingyu wasn’t blind to all those love letters and chocolate boxes you got every Valentine's day. But he really hadn’t expected you to look so beautiful in that dress. Nor had he expected his heart to stutter like that when you showed him the dress, twirling in it. 
Maybe it was because of the heat inside your bedroom due to all the closed windows and door or maybe it was because he was remembering those confusing emotions, but as Mingyu turned to look at you, he felt his heart stutter once more.
Your hands had a dusty orange on them from all those cheetos you had been munching on from earlier this evening, and your mouth was in an even worse condition. And yet, he felt warmth flood his chest when he realised he didn’t really care for your appearance. It didn’t really matter to him whether you had cheetos crumbs smeared on your lips or whether you were dancing in a beautiful evening gown.
Because you were, well you. You were Mingyu’s best friend of nine years and with someone he had shared every single memory with, be it a happy, sad or an embarrassing one. Of course he wouldn’t care about your appearance (hell, he had even seen you when you woke up after bawling your eyes out for the entire night) so why was this point coming to his mind now?
You were pretty and that was a fact. There was nothing to debate about it and yet here he was, not paying attention to the movie but wondering if all the guys who had chased you were aware of this side of you. Would they still ask you out? Would they still send you roses and chocolates during that time of the year?
He snorted at the very thought of how fake their affection towards you now felt. Mingyu was pretty sure they would run in the opposite direction if they saw you in this condition right now; wearing your old Melody pyjamas while eating chips in the most messy way ever. 
But he would never do that (assuming there was a hypothetical situation where he had to date you, of course). Because this was what made you you and he loved you for that. Everything about you was perfect in his eyes, including your flaws and mistakes.
Which once again, made his heart to stutter erratically causing him to suck in a harsh breath.
You turned to him when you heard him suck in a breath, your smiling expression changing to that of concern.
“Gyu? You okay?”
“Yeah I think…I think I’ve got a clogged artery.” Maybe it was high time he talked to a cardiologist. 
“Dammit. Told you to cut down on those snacks.”
“Me? Or you?” He laughed, pointing at the heap of empty snack packets around you. You pushed all the packets to his side and he gave you his usual ‘defeated smile’, causing you to laugh once again.
Damn, you were really pretty when you laughed.
“Oh but clogged arteries? Please Einstein, I bet you were thinking about a girl, weren’t you?”
“What the hell? Where did that come from?” He spluttered, taken aback by this sudden confrontation. You punched his arm lightly before wiggling your eyebrows at him (Mingyu made a mental point to ask Seungkwan to stop hanging out with you since you were clearly picking up his habits).
“My dude, you clearly have a crush on someone. Why else would your heart be jumping like that?”
“I don’t think I ever mentioned it was jumping?”
“Oh please. I’ve known you for so many years. I know what’s going on inside your head.”
Mingyu rolled his eyes. “I don’t have a crush on anyone, okay?”
“Then why is your heart jumping like that?”
“I told you it's not jumping-”
“The only explanation is that you have a crush on someone.” You winked, causing him to groan. Letting out a laugh you patted his shoulder gently, letting him know you were joking. “I’m just kidding, Gyu. If you ever had a crush on someone, you would have told me right?”
“Yeah…” Mingyu nodded. He would have told you right away, right? But what if…what if his crush was you? Would he be able to tell you then?
“Speaking of which, one of my friends thinks you are cute! Do you want to go on a date with her?”
“Er, I don’t think I’m good enough-”
“Excuse me?” You glared daggers at him, causing him to halt mid sentence. “You are not good enough? What are you even talking about? Anyone who knows you well knows that you are a literal gem! You are smart, cute, handsome and well-mannered! What else does a girl need?”
“Er.” He tried thinking of something to say, but his mind was stuck on something else you had said. You had called him smart, cute and handsome? Sure, he heard you say it a million times before but it did nothing to stop the heat creeping up his cheeks.
“Give it a try, please? Suji is a nice girl too, and I’m sure you both would click. You know I wouldn’t have even told you about this if I knew you wouldn’t like her, would I?” You asked, your lower lip jutting out in a pout. You looked so adorable right now, pouting at him slightly as you spoke in a soft voice, as though trying to convince a child to do something for you.
As though in a trance, Mingyu found himself nodding to your words. “Okay. But why does she like me? I mean, I barely know her.”
“I don’t know honestly. She just said she had a crush on you because you looked like her ideal type.”
“So…she loves me because I look like her ideal type?”
You narrowed your eyes at him and Mingyu wondered what had he done wrong. When he still didn’t reply, you rolled your eyes and took the remote controller, switching off the movie and edging closer to him.
“No, you silly. She doesn’t love you. I said, she has a crush on you. There’s a difference.”
His head spun at your words as he looked at you annoyed this time. Why were you complicating matters when it was clear he didn’t know a thing about this?
“Look crush is like a short infatuation. It doesn’t have much to do with personality, and is mostly based on looks. Love on the other hand, develops slowly, over a period of time. Like you could give a million reasons why you might have a crush on someone but love is, love is just…there’s no reason. You just love them despite everything and anything. Like…their imperfections don’t matter at all.”
“Like how I love you?” He asked, and you just laughed, slipping your hands into his. He grimaced as you oily fingers brushed against his, but somehow it felt comforting when you entwined your hand in his. 
“Of course not. We are just friends; everything is platonic between us. What I mean is loving a stranger, like a person you were not meant to be with in the first place. I mean like, not- not Seokmin, me or Seungkwan. Not your family or friends. Someone you accidentally happened to meet. Am I making sense?”
Mingyu nodded, understanding you very clearly. It made sense in a way. Loving you couldn’t possibly be the same as loving his girlfriend, could it? Loving you was like his second nature, like it was bound to happen and he couldn’t think of a time he didn’t love you and your friendship. Loving you was just so easy and just so natural; that had to be platonic right?
You switched back on the television, and for a few minutes, silence engulfed the two of you before you broke it again.
“You want to know something, Gyu?”
“What?”
“I would have definitely loved you if we weren’t best friends.” 
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“Hi!” 
Mingyu turned towards the excited squeak and found a girl of his age standing beside him, waving a bit too excitedly. He smiled at her politely before beckoning to the empty seat beside him for her to sit down.
He had finally agreed to go on a date with Suji, deciding that it wouldn’t hurt to enjoy a little bit before he became completely busy with his studies. He had tried searching for good places to go on a date that might suit both his and Suji’s taste, but finding none, he finally had resorted to asking Seokmin for advice. 
Currently the two of them were at the Food Plaza, a street completely dedicated to small food shops. According to Seokmin, he and his girlfriend enjoyed trying new food from there so it might be a great idea to take Suji there instead of a restaurant which would serve only a particular cuisine. 
“So, um, Suji.” Mingyu began. immediately wishing a hole would swallow him up because of how awkwardly he had started. “What do you eat? I mean, like, what would you like to eat? Like- Like cuisine wise?” 
“Uh, about that-”
“We could have Italian if you like! Or- or, uh, my friend actually recommended me this taco place but I’ve just got to search for it a bit-”
“I’m actually allergic to a lot of food.” She cut him off, smiling at Mingyu apologetically. As he stared at her, he could feel the embarrassment sinking in even more.
Oh. Oh. “Why didn’t you tell me before? I would have picked a different date spot.” He said, trying not to sound too dejected at how his first date was going.
“I didn’t want to offend you. I mean, it was the first time we were talking and you asked if this was fine with me and I felt it would be rude if I said no.” She said sheepishly, clearly equally embarrassed at how things were turning out.
Why did she have to overthink so much? Why did she have to be so polite?
“Then…do you want to go somewhere else-”
“I see a Subway here, behind you. Do you mind if we eat there instead?” She asked with a smile.
He forced a smile and got up, and she followed his lead. Oh great, this Subway is only a takeaway. “Of course not. Let’s have a Subway then.”
Mingyu had always had great expectations for his first date. He had always thought it would be at a nice comfortable place, enjoying the food as he got to know his date and vice versa. Never had he thought that he would be eating a Subway for his first date, sitting on one of the plastic chairs kept outside the shop, getting boiled under the hot sun.
The rest of the afternoon passed away in idle chatter. Suji was apparently a straight A student, but she had no other hobbies because she spent every single moment studying (he could understand her position, really, but it was still boring beyond words).They ended up talking about school and grades more than Mingyu had in his entire life and by the time they had finished lunch, his head was already throbbing.
Out of politeness he asked if she wanted to go to the amusement park but she told him she hated the amusement park, to which Mingyu had nothing to say.
Finally finding that there was nothing else to do (and they had nothing in common except for their grades), the two of them decided to call it a day. They bid each other goodbye with Suji thanking him for the food, and Mingyu promised he would catch up with her more (he didn’t intend to keep this one though).
The sun was already setting in by the time he began his walk back home and the atmosphere had gotten relatively cooler, but it did nothing to stop the pricking heat he was feeling all over his body. His head still throbbed from earlier despite finishing nearly two bottles by himself, so he decided to take some rest at the neighbourhood park.
He sat down on one of the wooden benches and finally let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in. 
What was wrong with him? Mingyu could feel his head spinning as he felt oddly hot, his clothes sticking to him uncomfortably. Talking to Suji made him feel so uncomfortable for some reason, it felt like he had been talking to a wall the entire time. It was awkward, forced and just so annoying even though he couldn’t tell why.
And he felt unhappy. Unexplainably unhappy. Like he had been forced to choose a career he hated or like he had been told to stop art altogether. 
Finally, he took out his phone and dialled a very familiar number, hoping you weren't busy at this moment.
You picked up at the first ring itself and he opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. What was he supposed to say? That he didn’t enjoy the date? He knew you wouldn’t feel offended by that and you would agree with him but then why couldn't he say anything to you? 
“Gyu?” You asked softly, your voice laced in worry. 
And that was enough to break him. He let out a sob as he screwed his eyes shut, feeling a heavy emotion wash over him.
“I’m sorry.” He whispered, though he himself was unsure what he was sorry about. “I’m so sorry. I just-”
“Where are you?” You cut him off gently, and he paused for a second to catch his breath. 
“I’m- I’m at the park near our apartment.”
“I’ll be there in five minutes, okay? Just hang in there.”
True to your words, you were there within five minutes, and he found you crouching down in front of him. Gently placing your hand on his knees, you asked again, “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”
He was still shaking from the aftermath of his sudden breakdown, the nauseous feeling threatening to rise if he opened his mouth to speak. So instead, he just opted to look at you with his teary eyes, hoping you would understand.
Mingyu had always been the softer one among the two of you. He was always the first one to end up with tears when he got hurt or offended, and at the same time he was the first one to forgive anyone for their mistakes. So it wasn’t really surprising that you had learnt to realise his emotions even if he didn’t, and you always knew the right word to soothe him.
“Hey,” You said, still talking softly to him. You took his hands in yours, gently rubbing circles on them with your thumb. “It’s okay. It’s completely fine that you didn’t like her, you know that right? Sometimes…things don’t work out the way we think they would. But why are you crying? Did she do something to you? Don’t tell me she forced you to kiss her or-”
“No, no, it’s not anything like that.” He inhaled sharply, finally finding his voice back. He didn’t want to ruin your friendship with Suji just because he was confused about what he was feeling and why he didn’t like her. “It’s just that…I don’t know. She felt so boring, bland and dry. Not in the offensive way! Like- like Minghao from my chess class talks about only grades and school too! But I never feel so dull…so lifeless with him.
“It’s okay.” You said with a reassuring smile that had warmth flooding back to his chest, the stupid prickling heat that had been irritating his skin now gone. Pressing a soft kiss onto his knuckles, you said, “We don’t have to justify why we don’t like or like someone ever, okay? It’s completely fine.” 
And all of a sudden Mingyu realised what he had been feeling, why he had felt so unhappy and what Suji had missing.
“I felt uncomfortable.” He said, just realising how comfortable he felt beside you. There was a feeling you radiated, which was something no one could ever replace. Whenever he was with you he felt like he was at home, like no matter what would happen he could always go back to you. 
Which was a given since you were his best friend. And yet, when he was with Suji all he could think of was you. Of how you made him feel. Of how you made him feel always.
“It’s okay, Gyu. It can happen. You know that I’ll always be there for you, right?” You smiled at him.
Mingyu smiled back at you, finally feeling like the throbbing in his head dull down a bit. As if on a cue, he remembered something like this had happened to the two of you long ago, another incident of you calming him down which had resulted in the two of you making a silly promise.
Back then it was a promise made at the heat of the moment, with little to almost no thought given to it since it was meant to be a light joke between the two of you. But when he extended his pinky to you and you immediately linked it with yours, Mingyu could feel your seriousness.
“I promise I’ll be there for you too.” 
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He pressed your doorbell multiple times furiously, patience running thin with every passing second. What was taking you so long? Were you that badly injured that you couldn’t even open the door-
The door finally swung open and Mingyu nearly flew in, engulfing you into a bone crushing hug.
“Ow! Mingyu- It hurts-” You clawed at his back but he still didn’t let go, pouring all his anger that had built up in the past few hours against you in this hug (he had always been told he had weird ways to show his anger). It was only when he felt you yank his hair at the back of his head lightly did he let you go.
“What the hell-” He began as he pulled away, still clutching at your shoulders. He took a deep breath in when he saw your split lip and bruised cheek, feeling his heart twist in the most horrendous way ever. “Did you think you were doing?”
Mingyu could feel the huge wave of guilt coursing through his veins right now. He shouldn’t be blaming you. This wasn’t even your fault in the first place. Why was he getting mad at you?
Because after all, this was actually all his fault. The whole reason you had even got into the fight in the first place was because of him.
And yet, you looked unfazed as you rolled your eyes at him, shrugging his hand off your shoulders. You walked into your bedroom and after making sure the front door was locked (your parents had gone out for a week and it was Mingyu’s responsibility to check if you were keeping up with the safety rules set by them), he followed you into your room.
“Why did you do that?” He asked once again, as you sat down on your bed with a huff. He followed suit and you turned to glare at him.
“What do you mean why did I do that? Of course I had to punch that asshole-” 
“Then are you going to get into a fight with anyone who says they don’t like me?”
“Of course I will! And it wasn’t even a matter of simple liking. He called you a whore just because you didn’t want to go out with his sister. Who the fuck does that? I needed to get some decency punched into his head!” You snapped, causing him to flinch at your anger.
Why were you so angry? It was true that even he would have been offended if someone had insulted you, but now you had gotten yourself hurt and that hurt him a lot more. 
“Did the school send you home early as a punishment?” He asked as he got up to search for the first aid box, trying to change the subject.
“Not as a punishment. The principal said he was letting me go since he was the one who started it. But they said that if I got into another fight, it would go down in my report.”
Mingyu hissed at the very thought of your report getting tainted due to him. Squeezing the antiseptic he had taken out from your first aid box onto a cotton bud, he was about to apply it on your lips but you caught his wrist. He looked up at you in surprise only to see you looking at him worriedly. 
“Are you mad at me?”
“I’m not mad. I’m just- Look, you got hurt. Because of me.” He said, his strained voice giving away the guilt he had been hiding all this time. He was mad at you; but only because you had got hurt so badly because of him.
“Nope. Not because of you. I got hurt because of that bastard-”
“Okay that’s enough swearing for a day. But why did you do that?”
“Done what?” You asked in annoyance, as though it was a stupid question he was asking. “Gotten into a fight? Gyu…wouldn’t you have done that for me too?”
“I- I would- I wouldn’t- Yeah. I would.” He whispered, feeling bile rise up his throat at the very thought of someone insulting you. Was that even possible? What would they even insult about you? What was even there to insult about you? You were so perfect in every way that Mingyu could not even think of any flaw that someone might find in you. “I would burn down the world for you.” He said, still whispering.
When you heard this, the creases that had formed in your eyebrows due to your anger disappeared, as you burst into laughter. He blinked at you confused, not sure why you were laughing. Nonetheless, he felt his own mood lighten a bit upon hearing your beautiful laugh, his heart skipping a beat when you smiled at him softly.
“Oh Gyu.” You said, grabbing his hand in yours. Right now you were looking so, so pretty that all Mingyu could do was stare at you and nod dumbly, all words dried from his throat. “You would burn the world down for me? Nah, you are too sweet for that.”
At this he snorted, jerking his hand away from you and proceeding to dab at your lips. “You underestimate my love for you.”
“I don’t.” You said, wincing a bit that caused him to freeze, scared that he was hurting you more. Seeing your wounds from up close made his heart squeeze painfully, and it oddly made him wish he had taken those punches instead of you. “I know you love me as much as I love you.”
“Then don’t get hurt.” He whispered. You blinked at him and he sighed frustratedly, pulling you into another hug. This one was gentler than the previous one and yet Mingyu held as close as he had done before, as though he was scared to let you go. “Then please don’t get hurt. It hurts me. It hurts me to see you like this.” 
He felt you gently pat his shoulder blades before wrapping your arms around his torso, pulling him even more closer. Your scent, which he had grown so familiar with, comforted him as you buried your face in the crook of his neck.
Hugs were not something uncommon between the two of you; you had hugged each other a million times before and nothing had changed between the two of you.
And yet right now, as Mingyu held your body close to his, he was hyper aware of how your skin felt against his, of how comfortably your body fit in his grip and of how his heart raced as you clutched his biceps. His heart hurt, his head hurt and yet, it felt so good to have you in his arms. 
It really felt like Mingyu was the one who got into a fight; everything hurt so badly. He thought of the raging emotion he had first felt when he had heard that his classmate had hurt you. He remembered the panic he felt when he entered the nurse room and couldn’t find you; he was worried that you were in a worse condition than he had thought you were in and had to be taken to the hospital. And he remembered the relief flooding back in him when the nurse told you had simply been asked to go back home and there was nothing serious about your bruises. It had nearly torn him apart as he waited for the day to get over, dying to go home and make sure that you were actually okay.
He thought of all the emotions he had experienced with you; happiness, anger, sadness, fear, surprise and even disgust. Mingyu had shared a huge journey with millions of memories with you. He really couldn’t even imagine what his life would have been like if it weren’t for you. It was impossible to even breathe without you.
Suddenly he remembered what Seokmin had told him once, that maybe, maybe he was in love with you.
It was back when they were on a school school field trip and students had been allowed some free time around the resort so Mingyu, Seokmin and Seungkwan decided to play on the monkey bars. They were just either sitting on it or swinging aimlessly (sixteen year olds were a bit too tall for a playground meant for five year olds) with idle chatter when you and your group came and sat down on the swing.
Normally Mingyu wouldn’t have really cared and the swings were too far from the monkey bar to involve himself in your talk but he glanced at you and felt himself smile. You were laughing and talking to your friend, the sunlight catching your hair and almost giving you an angelic glow.
It was already warm but Mingyu still felt warmth spreading in his chest, his cheeks heating up within seconds.
Back then, Seokmin had joked, only joked, that Mingyu was in love with you but now, he realised that it may be true.
That maybe, he was in love with you.
And not in the platonic way that you had explained to him. Not in the way where you both exchanged ‘i love yous’ regularly because you loved your friendship.
He loved you in the way Orpheus loved Eurydice, the way Romeo loved Juliet and the way Louisa Clark loved William Traynor. 
Because Mingyu had said it for himself; loving you was so easy and just so natural that he couldn’t even think of something else, he couldn’t even see himself falling in love with someone else. Loving you was like a river flowing, something that would have happened no matter what. Something that could not be stopped, because then it would be like a dam that had been forced to be built to stop Mingyu’s emotions from flowing.
“Just promise me you won’t get hurt.” He whispered and felt you slightly nod your head. You were gently rubbing circles on his back, with no idea what effect it had on him. “Promise me please. Because I love you so much that I can’t bear to see you get hurt.”
“I promise.” You mumbled almost immediately, unaware of the double meaning his words held. 
But that’s okay. Mingyu thought. You didn’t have to know about his feelings. He wasn’t going to burden you or your friendship with his one sided love. As long as you were happy, he was okay with it.
After all, some promises were meant to be broken.
Like this one. 
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“What did you even want to show us?” Seungkwan grumbled, squinting through the sunlight looking heavily annoyed.
Mingyu didn’t blame him though. They had been sitting at the cafe for the past half an hour doing nothing, still waiting for whatever ‘surprise’ you had planned for them. The hot weather made everything even worse; Seokmin was already on his fourth ice cream, Seungkwan was sipping his sixth iced americano and Mingyu himself had drunk two large glasses of milkshake and now he wanted to use the washroom so badly but could only resort to shaking his legs.
“If I tell you it won’t be a surprise anymore, will it?” You said, checking your phone for the millionth time. 
Mingyu realised that this was the first time in weeks he was hanging out with you. College was starting in a month and everyone had decided to take part in activities that might help them boost their respective subject knowledge. Since both of you had decided to major in different subjects, he hadn’t been able to see you much due to the conflicting schedules of your work. 
He felt warmth bloom in his chest as he watched you smile at your screen, the corners of his lips tugging when he realised how ridiculously pretty you looked. Mingyu had come to terms with the fact that love was indeed blind; in his eyes you would always be the most perfect human being and even though you would never see him in a non-romantic way, he would always love you.
All of a sudden your eyes lit up, and you jumped up from your chair. “He’s here!” You yelled as you dashed towards the entrance of the cafe.
Confusion settled between the three of them as both Seungkwan and Seokmin’s eyes fell on Mingyu.
“He? What’s she talking about?” Seungkwan asked urgently, but all Mingyu could do was furrow his eyebrows.
He? Who were you talking about? Was it a new friend? It couldn’t be your-
“Guys, meet my boyfriend!” 
Mingyu felt blood rush up his ears as he stared at you. A boy, of their age, beamed at the three of them along with you, both of you clutching each other’s hands. The two of you were met by complete silence, which was only interrupted when Seokmin’s spoon clattered onto the ground.
“Oh, hi!” He said, laughing awkwardly to ease the sudden tension that had built up. You pulled your ‘boyfriend’ down onto a chair beside you and it was only when the said man smiled at Mingyu did the truth finally sink in.
You had a boyfriend. A boyfriend.
Suddenly the air felt a thousand times hotter than it already was, compressing against him like it was trying to squeeze all the breath out of him. He felt his stomach drop as you smiled at the man beside you, your eyes holding so much love for him.
A love that could never ever be his. 
Mingyu felt like he was going to be sick. And his two friends were doing literally nothing to stop the nausea rising up his throat. Seungkwan was glaring very obviously at the newcomer while Seokmin smiled at him awkwardly. 
You looked at the three of them expectantly, your smile dropping a little when none of them showed the reaction you were clearly hoping for.
Mingyu felt his heart crack a little at your slightly crestfallen face and that’s when Mingyu realised how stupid he was acting.
How could he be this selfish? Just because he was in love with you didn’t mean that you couldn’t date or fall for someone else. Just because he loved you didn’t mean that you were obliged to return the same feelings. Hell, you didn’t even know that he was in love with you in the first place (which, Seungkwan and Seokmin considered a bit dense of you, because of the fact that it was apparently very obvious that Mingyu was and always had been in love with you; in fact that’s how they had come to know about this even without him telling them).
“Hi! Nice to meet you. I’m Mingyu. And this is Seungkwan and this is Seokmin.” He spoke, forcing a smile onto his face for your sake. You immediately beamed back at him and for a second, Mingyu almost forgot that your boyfriend was there.
“Hi Mingyu! I’m Jisung. Y/N’s talked so much about you! At first I thought your name was actually Gyu.” He laughed and Mingyu smiled back politely. 
He engaged himself in a casual conversation with Jisung and you, kicking his two friends lightly under the table so that they could help him a bit too. He didn't want you to feel bad. After all, you had looked really excited when you had first told them about the surprise and he wanted you to be happy.
"I'm hurt, though." Mingyu said with a pout, so that you would understand that he was only joking (he wasn't). "You never told me that the reason you kept putting your club activities over meeting up with me was because you had a boyfriend. You could have introduced us much sooner."
You smiled at him apologetically, a small shy one that caused his heart to stutter a little. 
“Hey, come on.” Jisung laughed, placing his hand over yours and giving it a squeeze. “Of course she would prioritise me, her boyfriend, over you, her best friend.”
“Excuse me?” Seungkwan asked as Mingyu felt his stomach twist in the most revolting way. He felt something catch his throat, his cheeks flaming at the comment more than the unbearable heat of the weather. 
Mingyu wasn’t stupid; he could feel the sudden tension in the air at Jisung’s comment and your slightly shocked face so he tried laughing it off. He really, really tried smiling at his words, however awkward the smile was, but for some reason he just couldn’t. All he could do was tighten his grip on the glass as he gritted his teeth to stop himself from lashing out.
Never had he felt so much anger towards someone. No matter how much he tried to digest that statement, he just couldn’t stop the bitterness from rising to his mouth. 
Because it was true.
Mingyu knew it was true, and so did everyone else present at the table.
He would always just be a best friend for you, while someone else played the role of your boyfriend. It was a part he could never play, no matter how much he loved you.
But Jisung telling him that definitely didn’t make anything better. It didn’t make his feelings for you go away or make him realise how stupid he was to fall in love with his best friend. If anything, it made him feel worse. It was like Jisung had on purpose crossed all boundaries, just to rile him up.
“H-Hey guys?” Seokmin interrupted, as though worried of what Mingyu might end up saying in the heat of the moment. “Didn’t the three of us promise to play on Joshua’s new xbox at two? If we want to reach on time then we need to leave now.”
“Oh, that’s right!” Seungkwan said, standing up and grabbing Mingyu’s elbow to pull him up. For a second Mingyu looked at his two best friends hurrying to leave in a confusion and then it finally hit him what they were actually trying to do.
“Ah, yeah. Sorry I forgot to mention this Y/N. But we need to leave now.” He said, forcing a smile onto his face just for you. You still looked taken aback from your boyfriend’s comment and just smiled back hastily at him.
"Uh, okay. I'm sure we all can hang out together later too!" You called after them, and they  hastily turned to you, bidding you a goodbye.
The three of them walked in complete silence for a while, as though the situation had not yet sunk in.
A boyfriend. His biggest worry was now coming true.
Mingyu could still taste the bile in his mouth and no matter how much he swallowed, the lump in his throat was still choking him.
"Hey man…" Seokmin said, stopping abruptly and causing the other two to do the same. He looked at Mingyu sadly, before patting him gently on the shoulder. "I'm so sorry."
He could feel tears sting his eyes as he balled his fists to stop them from falling. But no matter how much he tried, he just couldn't stop the feeling of his heart being ripped apart.
Why couldn't he be the one holding your hand right now? Why couldn't he be the one whom you looked at with so much love? Why couldn't he be the one who showered you with love and affection everyday?
The sadness clutched at his heart tightly as the first tear drop fell. Seungkwan clutched his hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze as though he could understand Mingyu’s feelings.
It's okay. He said to himself. You knew this would happen.
He hadn't felt this sad in years, not even when his friend Kwon Soonyoung made his entire friend group think he was the mafia when he wasn't, and definitely not when he had to force himself to keep a straight face when he heard guys talk about how pretty and awesome you were, or when you would open every single Valentine's Day letter and read them out to him, all the while giggling.
Mingyu felt Seokmin take his other hand and the comfort it gave him made him realise once again how grateful he was to the two of them.
He took in a shuddering breath to calm himself down before speaking. "Thanks a lot. For back there."
Seokmin shook his head, once again patting his back. "Don't mention it. I know this won't cheer you up and it probably sounds useless, but you both are going to two different colleges next month, right? Maybe, I’m saying maybe, you'll get over her. Maybe- maybe the lesser you see her, the easier it will be for you. Plus there's going to be so many other girls too, right?"
Mingyu just nodded, not having the heart to tell him how dull other girls looked to him beside you.
"But I just don't understand how Y/N still does not know that you are in love with her. I mean, even if she can't see it, surely her friends would have noticed?"
Mingyu shrugged, the feeling of dejection finally setting in as he watched the setting sun. But he always knew that one day or another, you would get a boyfriend that wasn't him and he would have to accept that. 
After all, the promise that the two of you had made was just a stupid joke, right? 
"Hey Mingyu. If you want, Soonyoung and I could accidently spill poison into that shit excuse of a boyfriend's coffee and Seungcheol or Jeonghan could cover it up."
He let out a laugh at this, feeling his mood lift up a bit. A bit.
"No thank you. I don't want any of you in jail."
"Damn, okay. What does she even see in that asshole anyways?"
Mingyu shrugged. "I guess everything that I lack."
"Hey, hey, hey." Seokmin shook his head at the two of them. "We need to cheer up! And you know what to do after a breakup?"
"Seokmin. To break up you need to be in a relationship in the first place. Mingyu hasn't even confessed to Y/N yet-"
"Do you," Seokmin flashed his eyes dangerously at Seungkwan. "Know what you need to do? That's right gentlemen. We need to stop by Joshua's house to play with his xbox."
"Did Joshua really buy a new xbox? Didn't he buy one last year?" Mingyu asked, already feeling slightly distracted.
"Yes and yes. You can thank me later on for being best friends with the richest kid from LA."
"He's friends with all of us."
"Whatever helps you sleep at night, Seungkwan." 
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𝐓𝐖𝐎. 𝐏𝐀𝐏𝐄𝐑 𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒
The rain poured down heavily as he ran across the wet road, ignoring the way his wet clothes clung on to his skin, making him feel cold and clammy. His sneakers were soggy too, making it almost difficult to run, but he didn’t want to think of the consequences if he didn’t get to you quickly. 
Mingyu came to a halt in front of a series of bars, taking out his phone hurriedly to check the address you had sent him. 
Correction: he whipped out his phone to check the incoherent words you sent him with the line "oick ne up pld".
By now understanding your drunk texts had become a second nature to him; he could decipher it as easily as your normal ones. In fact, this current situation was such a common occurrence that he knew that it wouldn’t really hurt you if he reached a minute or two late but he could never get rid of that horrible feeling in his heart that something, something might happen to you if he didn’t find you.
Finally stepping into the bar whose name you had sent, Mingyu scanned the crowd for your familiar face. Being a Friday, the place was really crowded but it didn’t take him long to find you seated on one of the stools near the counter, emptying your glass in a flash before resting your forehead against the counter.
The tightening in his chest returned as he took in your expression, your drunken state causing his heart to shatter into millions of pieces. 
He hated seeing you like this. He hated seeing you sad, he hated seeing you cry and he hated seeing you so heartbroken. It made him angry at the universe for making you cry, it made him angry at you ‘boyfriend’ for making you cry, and it made angry at himself.
It made him angry that he couldn’t protect you, or save you from feeling these emotions. It made him so angry that there were days he would just hate himself for not being able to make you smile. What was the point of being your best friend if he couldn’t protect you from those feelings? What was the point of loving you if you still got hurt over love?
Taking a deep breath to calm himself down, Mingyu walked over to your spot and sat down on the stool beside you. Then gently patting your back, he called your name softly. “Y/N? Can you hear me?” 
You immediately shot up, looking around a little dazed until your eyes landed on him. Squinting at him a little, you asked in a slurred voice, “Gyu?”
“Yeah. It’s me. Let’s go home, okay?” He asked, still speaking softly as he gently slung your arm over his shoulder. You let him pull you up from your chair as he tightened his grip on your waist, and you buried your face in his neck.
Mingyu felt your nose tickle his neck as you wrapped both of your arms around his shoulders tightly, but he ignored it and instead focused on literally dragging you out of the crowded place. Once the two of you had made it out safely, he quickly hailed for a taxi so that you didn’t get wet (and because it was physically impossible for him to drag you all the way back home). After making sure you were seated comfortably in the backseat, he slipped in beside you.
“Y/N?” He asked, poking your knees as you rested your head on his shoulder. The strong smell of alcohol on you pricked his nose in irritation but he let you be, allowing you to use his shirt as a tissue. “Did you…break up again?” 
You nodded slowly, sniffling once before looking up at him in teary eyes. Mingyu felt his heart break once again and it took him all his willpower to not wrap his arms around you and engulf you into a hug before you even spoke.
“He said- he said something was off. That he didn’t feel that I was really interested in him.” You mumbled into his shoulder. “I don’t get it though. I really liked him. What did he mean by ‘I wasn't interested in him’?”
“Maybe- maybe it's because you both have busy schedules?” Mingyu reasoned, not sure why he was trying for excuses for your boyfriend, now an ex. “Maybe he was under stress so he wasn’t able to figure things out in his end?”
“I don’t know.” You mumbled. “I-I thought it would work this time.”
It would work this time.
Mingyu had lost track of the number of times he had heard you spill those words, both in your drunken and sober state. It was a word he heard repeatedly over the years since college and he had thought that maybe after you got a job, he would stop having to hear those words.
But he still ended up hearing them after your every single break up, still sympathising with you like he was just your best friend and didn’t love you in any romantic way. 
“Maybe it’s time you, uh, try something different?” Another common response. “Like maybe stop being in a relationship for a while, heal yourself completely and then try?”
“I’ve tried, Gyu. I’ve tried it so many times. But for some reason, I feel like something is missing in my life if I’m not in a relationship. You understand, right?”
He did not understand. Mingyu had never been in a relationship before thanks to his one sided love for you but even apart from that, he couldn’t understand how you could jump from one person to another in such a short span of time even though each of it ended in the same sad, messy way.
The taxi finally came to a halt, indicating that they had reached their destination. Mingyu quickly paid the fare and gently pulled you out of the vehicle, him still supporting your maximum weight. 
Experience had taught him that dragging you all the way up to the fourth floor of the apartment not only was a bit strenuous to him but also hazardous to you (the dark corridors were not helping his clumsy nature in any way). So he slung your arms around his neck and pulled you onto his back, grabbing your knees as he made his way to the apartment elevator. 
Once he stepped out of the elevator and reached his front door, he slowly let go of your one knee and reached for his pant pocket to get his house key-
Shit. 
His hand came out empty and he felt panic grab him. Frantically, he reached for his other pocket but all he could feel was his wallet. In his hurry to get to you, he had forgotten to take his key with him. 
How could he be so stupid? He had always been an organised person and always checked, double checked everything before leaving the house. How could he forget something so important, especially when you needed his help?
Shit, shit, shit. If we stay here any longer, Y/N’s going to catch a cold. Should I just go to a hotel-
The front door swung open and if Mingyu had been asked at that instant which god he believed in, Mingyu would have said Jeon Wonwoo without a second's hesitation.  
“Oh god Wonwoo-” He began, as his older roommate just rolled his eyes, opening the door wider to let the two of you in. Carefully, Wonwoo helped a now unconscious you slide down from his back onto the couch. “How did you know-”
“How did I know you forgot your key?” Wonwoo asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Mingyu nodded, feeling Wonwoo’s disapproval through his stare. “Well, I went to your room to return your book but guess who had sneaked off so late at night?”
Mingyu averted his eyes down, feeling Wonwoo’s gaze pierce through him.
“It’s not that I have a problem with you hanging out so late at night. I’ve never even complained when Y/N crashes in your room. But why do you-” He inhaled sharply, trying to calm himself down. Mingyu felt guilt wash over him as Wonwoo continued. “But why do you run to her every single time? Do you have no self respect?”
He winced at his friend’s words even though he knew they were true. He had himself asked this question many times. Why didn’t he stop going to you everytime? Why did he force himself to shoulder your pain every single time? Why couldn’t he, for once, even hint that he loved you?
“You keep telling me it's the last time. Every single damn time.”
“I’m- I’m sorry. I promise this will be the last time-”
“You always say that!” He snapped. “You say that it's going to be the last time, and then you go back, and then get hurt as she rambles about her boyfriend and you still stick to her like she’s not hurting you; like you aren’t breaking inside, like-”
“Then what do you want me to do? Ignore her messages? Leave her alone in this state?”
“No!” Wonwoo hissed. “But if you don’t set boundaries, you are going to be her doormat forever! You’ll be a pushover-”
“Fine, I get it!” Mingyu snapped, mad at Wonwoo for not understanding him and mad at himself for being exactly what Wonwoo had just called him. Your doormat. “I get it, okay? I get what you mean. But I can’t just- I can’t- Fine, I’ll- I’ll get over-” 
Both the men flinched as you murmured in your sleep, causing them to finally pause. Wonwoo sighed as he shook his head, slowly walking back to his room.
“It’s up to you, Gyu. Either chase her or forget your feelings for her. But what you are doing now- it’s just going to hurt you more. I’ll be in my room if Y/N needs anything, okay?”
With that, he shut the door of his room, leaving Mingyu all alone with a snoring you. 
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“Gyu.” You said, swallowing your food abruptly to speak. It just resulted in the huge lump to get stuck in your throat, causing you to cough as you choked on it. Immediately Mingyu shot up from his chair and thumped your back, slowing it down to gentle pats as gradually stopped coughing. “Thanks.” You muttered, giving him a small smile as tears slid down your cheeks. 
“Be careful.” He said worriedly, pouring you another glass of juice. You took a sip of it and set it down, before giving him a bigger smile. Mingyu felt his heart clench painfully as you beamed at him gratefully; as though he was your saviour. 
“Thank you for the breakfast.” He just nodded, swallowing thickly as he tried to distract himself from your smile; anything that wouldn’t remind him of the way the sunlight from behind gave you a soft glow, the way the corner of your lips quirked up when you smiled, the way- “And- and thank you for yesterday. Thank you for always, actually.” You continued. 
“Don’t thank me.” He said, sitting down back on his seat. “That’s what friends do anyways, right?”
Opposite to him, he heard someone snort. Both of you turned your attention to Wonwoo, who was busy reading the newspaper (Mingyu had never seen his roommate with a newspaper; in fact the newspapers were only for him). 
“Ah,” you said, “thank you to you too, Wonwoo. Gyu told me that if it hadn’t been for your timely intervention, we would have frozen to death outside the house.” 
Wonwoo narrowed his eyes at you, as though trying to find the sarcasm in your statement. But you were genuinely smiling at him and Mingyu kicked Wonwoo lightly under the table. You might be stamping on Mingyu’s heart (unknowingly of course) but he knew you were always thankful to Wonwoo.
“It’s okay.” He muttered, going back to the newspaper. “I was just helping my friend.”
“Yeah, thanks for that too.” You turned back to him and scrunched your nose. “Gyu can be a little oblivious to his surroundings sometimes, right? He needs someone to take care of him sometimes.”
“Absolutely right.” Wonwoo stated coolly, picking up an egg tart that Mingyu had made specifically for you. He eyed Mingyu, before continuing to speak. “He definitely doesn't keep his own feelings and health in mind and is always dashing to help others, unaware about himself or what state he is in.” 
Mingyu laughed dryly at his roommate’s statement, before shooting him a glare. Wonwoo then continued again. “But Mingyu is really responsible. And always has everything under control.” (By now, Mingyu could feel sarcasm even in Wonwoo’s breath) “In fact most of the time, it’s him taking care of me. Besides, I think we can all agree that you need to be taken care of more than him.”
At this, Mingyu shot up from his chair once again, pulling you up by your elbow. “You are done right? I’ve already packed some lunch for you. Come on, I’ll drive you back home.”
You looked at him confused. “But- But I just started-”
“It’s okay, you can have them in the car!” He said, quickly picking up some tarts. You rose from your chair hesitantly, but nonetheless waved Wonwoo a small bye as you followed Mingyu out of the house. 
Just before closing the main door, Mingyu glared one last time at his roommate, but the older one just smiled at him, mouthing the words, ‘enjoy your “alone” time with Y/N.’ He air quoted the word alone, causing Mingyu to roll his eyes.
As he walked towards his car with you behind him, he made a mental note to talk to Wonwoo about not betraying roommates. 
“I’m sorry.” You said, as you finally settled in the car seat. Mingyu looked at you confusedly, not sure where this was coming from. You had never apologised to him before because there wasn’t any need to. He would have gone to pick you up if you had ever texted him, break up or not, drunk or sober. It wasn’t like the two of you were strangers either, where one had to apologise for the inconvenience caused. 
Wait, Mingyu thought. Don’t tell me she knows about-
“I keep asking you to come so late at night and pick me up. And then I crash into your house just like that. I can understand why Wonwoo doesn’t like me.” You said, a note of sadness lingering in your voice.
“Oh.” He let out a small breath of relief, feeling a tension release from his chest at your words. Over the years, as Mingyu saw how horribly you dealt with breakups, he had learnt to control his feelings even more whenever he was around you and not let a slip of word either. He didn’t want you to end up like that because of him, even the thought of it brought a stabbing pain to his chest. “Oh, don’t be sorry. What are friends for, huh? I’ve known you all my life. If I can’t help you get you home safely, I think your mother will stop thinking of me as her son.” He glanced at your direction as you gave him a small smile. 
But Mingyu could tell there was still some weight on your chest so he added, “And don’t worry about Wonwoo. He does like you. It’s just that- It's just that he is worried that one of us might get hurt, you know.” That one of us being me. “He’s a great guy, trust me. He’s nice and caring in his quiet ways. And he’s someone I trust with my life. Apart from you of course. And Seokmin and Seungkwan. And Joshua too.”
Mingyu saw you smile more brightly from the corner of his eyes as you reached forward and placed your hand over his, which was on the steering. Had it been someone else, Mingyu would have flinched and probably would have accidentally rammed the car into a wall (he was speaking this from experience; needless to say the female coworker didn’t even glance at his direction ever again despite the ‘crush’ she previously had on him).
But yours were so warm and comforting, he felt himself relaxing against your touch almost immediately, before realising you were probably watching him. Quickly he straightened up, and inhaled deeply to control his heart that was giving small squeezes every now and then.
“So, uh,” He began, venturing into the area he knew might be a bit painful for you. “What did he say this time?”
You seemed to understand who he was referring to by the way you withdrew your hands from his and crossed them in front of your chest. You frowned slightly though Mingyu wasn’t sure if it was because of the sunlight falling on your face or the content of yesterday night’s conversation.
“I don’t know, Gyu. I don’t know. He said he felt I wasn’t committed enough. What did he mean by that? I always readjusted my schedule to meet him, ditched my friends whenever he said he needed me and god knows what else. What more does he need?” 
“Did you mention that to him?”
“Of course I did! And he just felt that even though my actions were doing those, it was obvious my heart was searching for something else! Like what is he? A shaman?”
“Er, didn’t the last guy, what’s his name? Haejoon? Didn’t he say the same thing?” Mingyu asked.
“Who’s side are you on?” 
“Yours, of course.” 
“Good to know. But you are right, you know. They always say the same thing. Not only Haejoon and Jongmin. Starting from Jisung, they always say the same thing.”
“And what are you exactly searching for?” Mingyu asked as he carefully parked the car in front of your apartment. He really wanted to know what was the thing that you were looking for, the thing that caused your break ups and the thing that might finally give you solace. He wondered if he had what you were searching, though he doubted you would even bother looking for it in him. 
You shrugged as you got out of the door, pulling the bag of food along with you as you got out. “I don’t know. I don’t know myself.” You said, though in Mingyu’s opinion you didn’t look that affected by it. Mingyu had always loved how cool and chill you always were about life but right now, he was really dying to know what was the key point that would win your heart forever.
“Here, give that to me. It’s heavy. I’ll carry it.” He said, reaching forward to take the bag from your hand but you just moved the handle away from him, a playful glint in your eyes.
“What? Just because you’ve been living in the gym off lately doesn’t mean I can’t lift this much.” You said, walking up the stairs.
Mingyu frowned and paused for a second, before chasing after you. “How did you know that? I don’t think I’ve told you-”
“Those arms don’t lie, Gyu.” You said with a wink, stopping in front of your door as you rummaged through your purse for the house key. “And besides, Seokmin keeps me updated with his pictures-”
“What? Seokmin has been sending you gym pictures?” Mingyu gasped, feeling his head spin. You just laughed at him teasingly as you walked into the house, a sound which made Mingyu’s stomach somersault but right now his head was in a whirl. “Y/N! Answer me!”
“And what will you do if I say yes?” You said, amused at his reaction as you placed the bag of food carefully on the dining table before turning to you. Your one hand was on your hip, the other on the edge of the table and you were smiling at him brightly, eyes crinkling at the corners. 
You looked so, so pretty that for a second Mingyu had forgotten to answer your question. It was only when you raised your eyebrows at him did he realise he was staring, and quickly looked down so that you wouldn’t see the heat creeping up his cheeks. 
“Uh, it doesn’t really matter to me.” And it shouldn’t have mattered. Mingyu knew that Seokmin and you were just good friends, and that Seokmin was really faithful to his girlfriend but still, he couldn’t help feeling disgruntled about it. Why couldn’t it be his gym pictures you were asking for?
“Uh huh.” He heard you say, but it sounded closer than before. Mingyu looked up and almost jumped back, because you were so close to him now, that he could almost count the number of lashes on your eyes. He inhaled your scent; you smelled like his soap. But he never knew his soap smelt this good, never knew its scent could be this intoxicating, slowing down his reactions as you beamed at him mischievously. How the hell did you manage to smell better than him in his soap?
“You don’t need to pout so much, Gyu.” You said, cupping his cheeks as you scrunched your nose at him fondly. Despite being six feet, Mingyu felt like a small puppy in your arms, waiting for its master to pet it. It was taking all his resolve not to wrap his arms around your waist and kiss you, or even melt into your touch this easily. When did he become so whipped for you?
“You know,” You began a bit absent mindedly this time as you dropped your arms and took a step back from him. “You look very cute when you pout. But I don’t want you to be sad on my behalf, Gyu.”
Mingyu blinked at you. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, me being sad isn’t your fault Mingyu. My breakups, getting wasted or even jumping into relationships so hastily isn’t your fault. Don’t blame yourself.”
“What are you talking about, Y/N?”
You turned your back towards him and walked back to the dining table, carefully taking out the lunch boxes he had packed for you. “I see how you look after each break up. You look so hurt, more hurt than even I feel and somehow that hurts me more. I hate seeing you so hurt. It breaks me-” You inhaled sharply, trying to control the trembling in your voice. “I hate calling you each and every time, I hate leaning on you so much, I hate dumping all my sorrow over you. I hate it, hate it, hate it. I fucking hate it so much.”
“But- But” He began, still not sure what you were trying to say. His mind was in a whirl and it was hard getting out the thoughts in his head. “But I already told you many times that I don’t mind picking you up. I don’t mind being beside you whenever you go through these! If I don’t do these, then who will?” 
“And I hate seeing you sad.” You finally turned to face him and Mingyu felt his heart drop. You were…crying? “If you stop being sad, then I don’t mind you coming over to me. Otherwise…I feel selfish. I always feel like an awful person and I hate feeling like this so much. I’ve just wanted you to be happy, you know that Gyu.
He snorted. “Well, you are being selfish. You can’t stop me from doing this much for you. Do all our years of friendship mean nothing to you?” What was wrong with you? Why were you saying such things to him? Each word that escaped your mouth felt like a slash on his heart, like all the things he had done for you as a friend, as a person he loved and trusted, had meant nothing to you. 
“Gyu-”
“No, don’t start again! Don’t okay, don’t! You don’t get to decide what I feel or what I want to do for you! You are being selfish if you think it’s okay for me to stand back and watch you fall apart.”
“Mingyu, please listen to me-”
“If you care about my feelings then stop breaking up just like that!” He yelled. The silence that followed was almost deafening and as Mingyu watched your tears fall more, he realised that he too was crying. His whole body was shaking as he clenched his fists, feeling an anger he had never felt before coursing through his veins. 
Why did he do that? Why did he say that? Why was he feeling so hurt over your statement? Yes, you were being selfish by telling him to stand back and watch you cry every time, whether he loved you romantically or not. 
But it hurt him more that you were so ready to give him up was like a huge blow to him. And because of what, it made you sad?
He swallowed thickly, breathing in slowly as he tried to calm down his racing heart. “If- if you want me to be happy, focus on yourself first. After all, it was you who started it.”
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“And one kilogram of cheddar cheese.” Wonwoo said, and Mingyu reached out to take the last slab of cheese kept in the open freezer, but instead he found himself holding someone else’s hand, who was holding the cheese he was about to grab.
He immediately jerked his arm back and turned to profusely beg for forgiveness, but froze when his eyes met the other person, who too was staring back at him with a look of shock. 
Your eyes averted down to your shoes as you took a step back almost immediately, clutching the part of your wrist he had just held. And he would have kept staring at you, trying to think of something to say after last week’s fight if it wasn’t for the sudden crash sound from beside you that snapped both of you out of your daze.
Mingyu turned to his right to see a curly haired girl staring back at the trio, all the items that were once in her hand on the floor now. 
“Ni!” You gasped, running towards the girl to help her pick up the things. Mingyu too moved forward to help but Wonwoo was the fastest among the three, picking up the groceries and handing them to her.
As she took it slowly from his hands, Mingyu all of a sudden realised that she wasn’t staring at all the three of them, she was staring at his roommate. At Wonwoo.
His eyes darted to you and you too wore an expression of shock and surprise, as your head moved between Ni and Wonwoo, as though finally understanding the situation.
“Are you okay?” Wonwoo asked, the question snapping her out of her trance as she looked away, cheeks flushed in embarrassment. Then turning back to him she nodded a little, before asking, “Are you okay?”
Wonwoo blinked at her for a second before she realised what she had just said, flushing once more as she furiously corrected herself again. “I-I mean, thanks a lot. For helping me, I mean.”
Mingyu looked at you once again and smirked, as you too mirrored back his expression. He very well could see where this situation was going and for once he hoped that Wonwoo wouldn’t screw it up.
“No problem.” Wonwoo said, before looking back at Mingyu. “So, uh, Mingyu should we-”
“Oh hey, are you sure you don’t want any help?” Mingyu interjected, signalling at Ni with his eyes, hoping she would get the hint. “Like um, do you want any help getting stuff from the top shelf because-”
because you are short? Was that rude? Was he overdoing it? But like he was blessed to have you as his best friend, you came to his rescue immediately. “Because you are short! And Wonwoo is tall! There’s nothing wrong in asking a sexy, handsome, tall man to help, right?”
Mingyu had always thought it was your charming personality and unearthly beauty that got you the long list of lovers but now he made a mental note to add smooth talker to it. Because while he was sure that if he had said that statement Wonwoo would have said no, he could literally see the wheels in his roommate’s brain turning as he mulled over your words.
“Sure.” He said, turning back to give Ni a smile. “Where’s your grocery list? I could help you.” Saying that he turned to look at you, tilting his head as he said something to you through his eyes. You pursed your lips a bit but looked at Ni and gave her a smile.
The two of them then disappeared down the aisle, leaving Mingyu alone with you, the coolness from the freezer all of a sudden disappearing as he felt the awkwardness settle in.
It had been a week since the argument the two of you had but none of you had made an approach to talk it out. And now seemed to be the perfect time to talk about it but once again the two of you just stared at the floor, waiting for each other to break the ice.
“Uh, so about that day…” You began, as both of you looked up at the same time. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. I mean, yeah, even I’m sorry so-”
“Well you shouldn’t be.” You interrupted him. Then taking in a deep breath, you stepped closer to him, looking down again. You looked so nervous and confused, as though you weren’t sure of how to apologise to him.  “I mean, you shouldn’t be sorry because you were right. You were trying to help me, but, you know- I’m trying to sort out my feelings still, trying to find out what’s wrong and uh,-”
“Hey.” He said softly, putting his hands on your shoulder causing you to look up at him. You looked so sorry that Mingyu almost forgave you then and there. But he knew the two of you needed to talk it out so instead he said, “How about we talk about this after a few more days? I think we both are affected by this so I think we both should sort out our feelings and thoughts and then talk about it. You’re right, I do get hurt everytime I see and I know that hurts you too. But you very well know I can’t leave you like that, can I? If our roles were reversed you would do the same for me.”
You opened your mouth to say something but then closed it, slowly nodding as you let out a sigh and leaned in to rest your head on his shoulder. He felt his muscles tense as he inhaled in your scent, but relaxed almost immediately when you wrapped your arms around his waist. He did the same too, pulling you in closer as you stood like that for a few seconds before breaking the silence again with a chuckle.
“When did you become so mature, Mingoo?” You asked, causing him to groan. “Back when we were kids it was always me taking care of you. When did you grow up so much?”
“Hmmm, maybe if you took care yourself a little bit more-”
“Okay, okay!” You laughed, pulling away from him to look at him. You smiled at him softly, the familiar heat sparking in his heart as you nodded at him. “You are right. I promise I’ll get back to you in a few more days. Wait for me till then?”
I’m always waiting for you.
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“You guys are terrible.” You groaned, tearing the wrapper of the triangular kimbap. You glared at five men sitting opposite to you individually, before taking a bite of food in your hand. “This is not what I had asked you all for!”
“Blame that on Mingyu.” Seungkwan grumbled, shooting a glare in his direction as he picked up a fish cake bar and unwrapped it, dipping it into his ramyeon cup. 
Mingyu could feel the disappointed look of his friends on him, so he cleared his throat and tried to divert the blame away from him. “Come on guys. You all love eating at this convenience store. We’ve eaten so many times here during our college days! Doesn’t it bring back memories again? Just the five of us, meeting up after a month and enjoying a meal here? Can't you guys feel the nostalgia?” 
He felt you slap his shoulder lightly, and he grabbed it with an exaggeration. hoping that would make you soft for him and you would stop scolding him so badly. 
“Did I ask you to set up a reunion meeting? I asked you to pick a restaurant according to the guys’ convenience because I wanted to treat them!” You pursed your lips and glared at him once more, and the situation would have scared Mingyu out of his wits if he couldn’t hear Seokmin’s giggling from the corner. 
“Sheesh.” He muttered, rubbing his shoulder. He was used to being blamed by the group for the simplest reasons such as breathing in the wrong way but he really hadn’t meant to mess up your well intentioned plans. “It’s fine, just eat up. Think that we cannot afford to eat at those pricey restaurants right now and eat up. Besides, I know you guys love this. Weren’t you craving cup ramyeon even yesterday, Wonwoo?” 
Wonwoo froze in the middle of slurping his noodles, before putting it down and saying, “I said I was craving your noodles.” 
Mingyu let out a gasp, not expecting to be betrayed even by his own roommate, (it was evident Wonwoo hadn’t listened to his lecture about not betraying roommates) but it was swallowed by your laughter. He turned to look at you just as you stopped, chuckling at him as though still enjoying the joke. 
The dim lights of the neon signboard hit you at an odd angle, but it was enough to make you look like an angel. You let out a giggle as he stared back at you, the smile growing on his face involuntarily. He could see the tiredness from the entire day’s work on your face, but you kept smiling back at him with such tenderness and love that Mingyu felt like his heart was going to explode. 
Someone cleared their throat at the table, snapping both of you out of your daze and you immediately knitted your eyebrows back into a frown. “Oh gosh, Kim Mingyu! We could have been eating barbeque but now here we are stuck-” You said, shoving another fish cake packet to his face, “-eating this amazing, nostalgia inducing food!”
“Oh god, it brings back so many memories.” Seokmin sobbed, rubbing the corner of his (dry) eyes. Mingyu rolled his eyes at his friends’ dramatics, but he couldn’t help smiling at them. “It reminds me of the time Mingyu and I kissed.”
“Wha-” His voice was caught off as Seungkwan spat out the water he had been drinking, spluttering and gasping for breathe as Wonwoo thumped his back hurriedly. And even though Mingyu too was worried about him, the only thing he could do was let out a cry because unfortunately for him, he had been sitting opposite to the Seungkwan, causing all the spat out water to fall on his face.
“Seungkwan!” He cried as the table erupted in another round of laughter. 
“Oh my god Mingyu, are you crying? Don’t cry baby!” Joshua asked, mischief laced in his voice. Of all the seats I could have sat on, why did I pick the one next to Joshua? Joshua grabbed a few napkins from the table and began dabbing it on his face, cleaning his ‘tears’. “Don’t cry, Gyu. We’ve got your back always.” Then dropping his voice a little, he added, “You know we’ve been joking from the very beginning right?”
Mingyu took the tissues from his hand as he nodded, a small laugh escaping him as he rubbed the rest of his face clean. “You guys are mental.”
Suddenly he felt a familiar pair of arms wrap around his torso, causing him to inhale sharply as you leaned against his body, glaring at the other guys. “Yeah, why are you pestering my poor baby?” 
Oh god. Oh god. He tried to control his face from heating up, balling his fists so that he didn’t lose his senses due to your scent. Seungkwan must have noticed his sudden change in demeanour because he snorted and said, “That’s one big baby you have.”
“Besides,” Joshua said, pulling him away from your embrace and into his instead. “You were pestering him earlier too.”  
“Getting pestered is just Mingyu’s love language.” You countered back. “But of course, it should be only by us. Right Gyu?”
“I don’t want to be pestered by any of you though?” He said, to which Joshua pressed his finger to his lips, shushing him. “If we don’t pester someone as nice as you, someone who can always laugh it off because he knows we are just joking and we actually love him, who else will we pester?”
“Wow,” Mingyu said sarcastically. “You guys are such angels. I love my friends who pester me!” 
“I don’t pester you though?” Wonwoo said, causing ‘ey’s and ‘fucking liar’s to rise from around the table. He just laughed at them before raising his can of beer, saying, “To our friendship!”
“To our friendship.” Everyone echoed back, raising their drinks too, before taking a large sip of it. 
Mingyu could feel the alcohol slowly settling in his system, a pleasant buzz tingling his entire self. The rest of the night passed by with such speed that one minute he was still eating and joking with his friends and in the next minute he found himself walking beside you, taking you back home.
He had insisted on walking you back home despite your refusal, because apart from knowing that it was dangerous for you to walk alone at night especially in this slightly intoxicated state, he also knew that his own mother would kill him if she came to know that he had let you go just like that. 
Presently the two of you were walking through an uphill alley, you giggling at some old memory while he complained about the unfairness of it to you. 
Suddenly you grabbed his arm, causing his heart to skip a beat as you jerked him towards you, looking at him with shining eyes. 
“Gyu,” you whispered, even though there was no reason to do so, “Want to see something special?” 
“Special?” He asked, his voice a little higher than he had expected it to be. Your face was so close to his that he could almost feel your breath against his neck, gulping slowly to control his breathing. “We- we have work tomorrow. Don’t you think it’s a bit too late-”
“Oh, don’t be such a spoilsport.” You scolded him lightly, before smiling at him softly. He prayed to god that the warm, giddy sensation he was feeling in his body was due to the alcohol and not due to how you were smiling at him, eyes shining in a dangerous way as though you were about to show him a secret that was meant only for him.
“Okay.” He said, straightening up a bit so as to put some distance between the two of you. “But only if we come back within half an hour-”
“Oh, you can just crash in my house.” You said, all of a sudden giving him a light shove backwards. He looked at you in surprise as you suddenly took off, screaming at the top of your voice, “Race you to the top!”
“Why, you-” He began, before starting to run too, laughing at your dirty method of cheating. You knew you wouldn't be able to beat him, not when he had such long legs and had a much better stamina than you. But there was no way Mingyu was going to let you win, not when you had decided to win like this.
He caught up with you within a few seconds, throwing his arms around you as he pulled you into a bone crushing hug. You shrieked with laughter as the two of you stumbled, doing your best to break from his grip but all those days in the gym had truly paid off as all you could do was claw at his arms helplessly. 
“Okay! Okay!” You yelled, gasping for breath because of how much you were laughing. “You win! You win, okay?” But he still didn’t let go, burying his face into your shoulder as he giggled continuously. He could feel that he was losing his grip on you because of his sides aching due to his laughter, but you felt so warm in his arms, your clothes really soft and smelling like you that it made him pull you into him even more. 
In the back of his mind Mingyu wondered if the two of you were causing too much ruckus so late in the night, but all thoughts were pushed back when you suddenly turned in his arms to face him, wrapping your arms around his neck. 
Time slowed down as he felt his stomach drop as you beamed at him gently, a soft smile on your beautiful lips as you tilted your head a little, looking at him with nothing but pure adoration. He felt his arms instinctively tighten around your waist, his breath hitching slightly as you leaned into him, noses almost brushing. 
“This is it.” You whispered, your breath ghosting his lips. His mind was swirling as his heart raced, sure you could feel it with how close you were pressed to him. You smelt so, so good; it was enough to cloud all of his judgement. His knees had turned completely jelly at the way you were gazing at him, mouth slightly apart and it took him all his willpower to not drop you as you leaned your entire weight on him. 
“Wh- what is this?” He asked, finally finding his voice as he forced his mind to come back to the present. He had to focus. He couldn’t let himself sweep away because of this.
The corners of your lips curled up a little, an action Mingyu had always found endearing. “This is the special thing I wanted to show you.”
He blinked, trying to process your words. Tearing his eyes away from your face, he looked around slightly bewildered, still not understanding what you meant. 
You laughed lightly, and he could feel your chest rapidly rising and falling against his. “No, you idiot. Don’t look around. Just look at me. Us. We are the special thing I wanted to show you.” 
He inhaled sharply at your words, finally the meaning settling in.
You were right. What more could be special to him than the friendship between both of you? The two of you loved each other so much, admitted you loved him platonically, but still, it was such a beautiful thing. The two of your actions and mannerism had  been shaped by each other’s influences. He carried a part of you just like you carried a part of him.
“You're right.” He said, exhaling slowly as your eyes fluttered due to his breath. “You are so special to me, Y/N. I- I love you so much Y/N. I love you so much.” His chest contracted painfully when he said those words but he knew if he didn’t say them, he would combust even if you didn’t get the second meaning of these innocent words.
You sighed contentedly in his arms, before wrinkling your eyebrows in a frown. Then taking in a deep breath you said, “Mingyu, I- I’m terribly sorry for yelling at you that day.”
“What?” He asked, a little taken aback as he hadn’t expected you to bring that conversation back up for a while, and certainly not now. You just dipped your head low, until your forehead was resting on his shoulder. “I’m sorry. I messed up big time. And I made you feel that I was using you.”
Something caught his throat at your apology, so he just chose to keep quiet and listen to you, opting to rub small comforting circles on your back instead.
“It’s just that I felt really bad seeing you look so sad on my behalf. Because of me. And I know I asked you back then to pick me up, not to feel hurt but you were right. Because like you said, even if it happened to you I would feel upset. Whether or not you ask me to stay out of it.” You finally looked up at him, lips slightly apart as your eyes ran all over his face. Even though you weren’t crying, he could see that your eyes had turned glossy. “And you were right. I know we already talked about this but still it was half assed so I feel like you deserve this apology. I want you to know that I’m truly sorry and I don’t want you to get hurt. The best way to make sure you aren’t getting hurt is to by making sure I just don’t jump into relationships. I was never a thousand percent sure of any of my relationships so far and yet I went into them and they all resulted in the same way. So I’m going to wait for the one that I’m a thousand percent sure about and only then go for it. How does that sound?” 
“Good.” He said, giving you a small smile. “I just want you to be happy and take care of yourself, okay?”
You smiled back at him and nodded, before pushing yourself away from his grip. His disappointment at the loss of warmth soon disappeared when you grabbed his hand and pulled him forward, until you were leading him into an empty park.
“This,” You said pointing at the sky. “Is what I actually wanted to show you by the way.”
“You…wanted to show me the moon? Something we could have seen from your rooftop and reduced the risk of freezing to death while walking through some lonely street?”
“Hahaha. Very funny. I’m pointing at the stars.”
He blinked at you, pretending to look offended. “I thought you said we were the special thing you wanted to show me?”
“Yeah, that too. But since you have a very kind and considerate best friend, I even wanted to show you the stars. And as a sorry for the bitch I was.” If you had said this in an alternate universe where Mingyu and you were dating, he might have dropped some flirty comment about you being the brightest star in his eyes or something but since he wasn’t, he decided to keep it to himself instead.
He followed your suit and craned his neck to see the night sky, not finding a single speck of light in the ink black sheet overhead.
“There’s no stars, though?” He asked amusedly, watching you as you swore and kept turning your head, as though changing the angle of observation might help you find one. “I did tell you years ago that light pollution has made it impossible, hasn’t it?”
“Yeah, I know.” You muttered, still searching for them (Mingyu found it endearing on how persistent you were of showing him the stars and would have fallen for you more if he wasn’t already completely enamoured by you). “I just- I just thought since this was uphill and was a little empty it might be a good spot.”
That statement caught him off surprise. “You searched up for this place?”
Finally you gave up with a sigh, walking towards him in a dejected manner. “Yeah, yeah I did. I knew you would walk me home so I spent the entire night yesterday on Google Earth trying to find a good spot.” Your shoulder slumped a little as you sat down on a bench, Mingyu following suit. “I guess I should have come here physically and checked it before getting you here. Or looked around more on foot instead.”
“What the hell, I literally just told you it’s dangerous for you to roam around in the night on your own.” He said but it didn’t remove the pout from your face.
“I just wanted to show you how truly sorry I am. That I really, really want you to be happy.”
He reached over and grabbed your hand, giving it a squeeze. It was surprisingly warm despite how much the temperature had dropped, and he hoped that you too could find comfort in his warmth. 
“Don’t worry, Y/N. I already forgave you when you said you would finally prioritise yourself. Besides, I can already see Orion up there.”
“What?” You asked, your head snapping up. “Where?”
Mingyu laughed at your eagerness, before you let out a ‘Hey!’ and punched him lightly. “Oh please. You are forgetting that I’m an artist. The best artist you've seen, right?” He wondered for a second if you still remembered that incident from twenty years ago, when you had claimed that he was the best artist you had ever seen. 
Your lips stretched into a smile at the memory, causing his heart to jump that it was not only him that remembered such trivial things of your friendship. 
“Yeah,” You muttered, tightening your grip on his hand as you gently rested your head on his shoulder. “You are the best artist I’ve ever known. Will always be.”
As Mingyu rested his head against yours and closed his eyes, he realised just how special the word us was. 
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“Good morning, handsome.”
Mingyu swivelled on his chair at this weird greeting, only to find Seokmin leaning against the glass door frame, arms crossed over his chest with a rather flirty smirk on his face. He just groaned and rolled his eyes while Joshua just let out a small laugh. 
“What?” Seokmin asked, looking offended as his smile suddenly dropped, as though his girlfriend had just called him ugly. 
“Go back to work, Seokmin. Don’t you and Seungkwan have any sound effects to add to the last game?” Mingyu asked.
Seokmin just stuck his tongue out, before walking over to Joshua, who was still laughing at his antiques. “I wasn’t even talking to you. I was greeting Shua.” He said, and Mingyu rolled his eyes once again. 
“What brings you here?” Joshua asked, picking up one of the hundred cups of coffee he and Mingyu had kept in between them and handing it over to Seokmin. But Seokmin just shook his head, opting to take Mingyu’s sandwich instead. He raised his eyebrows a little at Mingyu, asking if he could eat it and the latter nodded. Seokmin took a bite of it, chewing slowly before sitting down on an empty chair.
“Sorry, can't really drink coffee much nowadays. And I already had one in the morning. Apparently it dries out your vocal folds and mucus.” He said. “Makes working for the entire day hard but what else can I do if we are so broke that us sound engineers itself need to record and compose apart from our usual role?” 
“Don’t let Wonwoo hear you about us being broke.” Mingyu chuckled, before remembering about the other person in the sounds department. “Oh my god, how is Seungkwan surviving then?”
“He says if he drinks it in excess it will nullify the effect.”
“Oh shit, Seungkwan’s going to retire even before we hit mid life crisis.” Joshua joked. 
Seokmin too smiled before pointing at all the coffee cups on their desks. “Well looking at all those cups, I can say the same about the graphics department to be honest.”
“Oh this?” Mingyu asked, pointing at the cups. “This isn’t for us, it's for watering the plants.”
“Heh.” Seokmin said, before standing up once he had done with the sandwich. “Then you guys will need more of it because we just got a whole new batch of houseplants.” He placed a file on their desk, clearly another new project, before saying, “God bless Y/N. She’s the best salesperson we’ve ever had.”
“Y/N gave this?” Mingyu asked in amusement, picking up the file to go through it. “She trusts us too much, considering the fact I already told her we still haven’t finished the last client’s game yet.” 
“It’s fine.” Joshua said, leaning back against his chair. “He’s a nice author. He literally told me, ‘It took me a lot of time to come with this huge storyline so I know it will take you guys even more time’.” 
“I wish Wonwoo would hire Y/N though.” Seokmin groaned. “He’s a great programmer and all but I just don’t get why he hates her so much. He was pretty fine with her at the beginning.” 
Mingyu felt his cheeks burn as Joshua said, “Isn’t it obvious? He can’t stand seeing Y/N use Mingyu even if she’s clueless. Personally, sometimes when Mingyu’s giving her puppy eyes, I want to scream, cry, throw up and shake her until she starts seeing his feelings.”
“Looks like Wonwoo isn’t the only blind one among us.”
Mingyu snorted at this, before adding, “I don’t give her puppy eyes by the way.”
“You really don’t know yourself then. You always looked like a dog to me.” Seokmin commented. 
“Wow. Wow. I’m going to take that as a compliment.” 
“Think whatever you want. Just because all those girls line up to see your biceps at the gym doesn’t mean I think you are handsome.”
“Are you salty that you had one less fan girl than Mingyu, Seokmin?” Joshua asked sweetly to which Seokmin just laughed. “No way, I have a girlfriend and they all know it. Me and Seungkwan are committed to our beautiful girlfriends. It’s always the two of you flexing your biceps a little too hard in front of them. At least Wonwoo is chad about it and not like you bitchless losers.”
“Oh no, are you forgetting Wonwoo’s new date? That cute girl he met at the grocery store? Also, it's not our fault you guys managed to find love at high school and college. Adult life wasn’t the fun and thrills they had promised us.” Mingyu complained. “Besides, I’m in a life long one sided love with my other best friend, not my fault.”
“Yeah, and I had a girlfriend too.” Joshua said, to which Mingyu and Seokmin deadpanned at him. 
“You mean you had a hook up with Wonwoo’s ex-secretary.”
“And she just quit the next day. Out of the blue. And no one would have known if Wonwoo didn’t grill us on if we did something to her. Hell he even made you write a thousand times that you will not have office sex. You are lucky it's just the five of us here.”
Joshua raised his arms defensively. “Hey, I told you I don’t know why she quit. I never forced her to do anything. I would never. But the question should be why does Wonwoo need a secretary when he’s actually at the same level as us? Just because opening a gaming company was his initial idea doesn’t mean that he is the CEO now. We all contributed.”
“Are we all rebelling against Wonwoo today?” Mingyu asked with a giggle. 
Seokmin pointed at the door. “Should I go get Seungkwan?” 
“Instead of the secretary, Wonwoo could have hired Y/N. Wasn’t she the topper of her class? I aspire to achieve her dedication.” Joshua said.
“In fact, she dropped this file personally this morning. Asked me to imitate her and wish you ‘handsome men’ a good morning once it got clearance from Wonwoo.” 
Mingyu’s mouth fell open in disgust. “You tried imitating her? God, that was so bad I thought you were flirting with us. You captured her horribly.”
Joshua pointed at Mingyu with wide eyes as he laughed. “See? This is why Wonwoo won't hire Y/N. She could straight up rob us and Mingyu will jump to her defence even then.” 
He rolled his eyes at them and finally looked down at the file in his hands, trying to skim through the content. Suddenly he felt bile rise up his throat and constrict his air passage as he read more and more, stomach dropping at the rather familiar storyline. 
“Oh my god, it’s so frustrating!” Seokmin cried, frustratingly wiping away his nonexistent tears. “Why won’t Y/N look at you?”
“Don’t you guys start too.” Mingyu mumbled, turning back to his desk. He had finally finished reading the storyline of the new game and the frustration of the scene suddenly hit as the air around him changed to seriousness, all the humour from before gone.
“What’s wrong?” He heard Joshua ask but he just shook his head, not wanting to talk about it anymore. 
“I’m sorry guys. We need to get back to work.” He said, before switching his computer back on. Through the corner of his eyes he saw Joshua pick up the file and lean in to read, Seokmin peering at it over his shoulders.
“Oh…” Seokmin said after some time. “Mingyu, I’m so sorry-”
“Don’t” He let out a humourless laugh. “Don’t. It’s okay. I’m okay.”
“No, you are not.” Joshua began angrily. “If Y/N would just-” 
“Just drop it please.” He cut Joshua off, closing his eyes as he buried his face in his palm. If Y/N could this, if Y/N could that, if only he was a bit more bolder-
“Even a game character manages to confess his love to his best friend and end up together. Just how- just how pathetic am I?”
He could feel his friend’s sad stares on his back and it just worsened his mood. Every bit of him just wanted to curl into a ball and cry. 
Why couldn’t he fall out of love with you? Why couldn’t he just stop loving you? Why did you have to be so goddamn perfect in every way that no matter how hard he tried, he still ended up pining for you?
“It’s just a game.” He said, his voice thicker than he had expected it to be. “It’s just a game. Let’s go back to work.”
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“This isn’t a date, by the way.” Mingyu clarified, causing the girl sitting opposite to him to give him a dry look. 
“It’s not. It’s a self realisation therapy from your pathetic love life.” She said, slicing into her meat. Mingyu winced at her words but couldn’t say anything back because, well, she was right. 
When Minghao had learnt that Y/N had broken up with her umpteenth boyfriend, he had decided to take matters into his own hand and asked (read: forced) Mingyu to go on a date with none other than Joshua’s sister, Julia. 
“If Joshua finds out you’re having a dinner date with me, you’re dead.” She said, as though being able to read his mind. 
“And if Wonwoo finds out I’m having a dinner date with his new secretary, I’m dead. In other words, I’m in a risky position of being murdered by my best friends.” 
At this, Julia laughed, the mood of the table finally changing from annoyance at being forced to randomly go on a ‘date’ to that of one Mingyu was used to whenever he used to play with her everytime he would come over to Joshua’s house. 
“It’s okay Dr. Black. I’ll find the culprit and make sure he gets what he deserves. You know how good I’m at Cluedo.”
“Yeah.” Mingyu said with a smile at the memory of the younger girl always defeating them at the murder mystery board game. “But the problem is Wonwoo is too smart while Joshua’s really creative. It might be hard for you to guess who did it.” 
“It’s fine, don’t worry. I’m sure all twelve of them want you to be alive for a very long time so that you can get married to Y/N and grow old and boring with her.” She said, rolling her eyes.
“By the way, I’m amazed by all of their deduction skills. Except the four who always hang out with me, I mean. How did they all come to know?” 
“Duh.” She rolled her eyes at him. “It was so obvious that even Soonyoung didn’t need to blabber away. Hell, even I knew it before you realised it.”
“Wow, thanks.” He muttered. “Good to know that I’m obvious to everyone except that one person I wish would know.”
Julia chuckled, shaking her head a little. “You are to blame too. You always run to her beck and call no matter what.”
“That’s because-” Mingyu opened his mouth to explain but she just raised her hand, cutting him off.
“Don’t give me that crap about doing everything for your best friend. Because yes, you should be doing a lot of things for your best friend. But there’s a limit to everything, Mingyu. Knowingly or unknowingly, she’s trampling on your feelings. Excess of even good things isn’t healthy for us.”
His eyes dropped to his food, which suddenly felt unappetizing. He swallowed the food stuck in his throat, feeling a bad taste in his mouth. 
“But I- But I just don’t know how to tackle this.” He whispered, and Julia reached out to hold his hand lightly. He looked up at her and saw the sadness and sympathy in her eyes. 
“It’s okay.” She whispered. “It’s okay, Mingyu. We all come across situations where we might feel like we are being trampled by the person we love in some way or the other, even if it’s not their intention. And you know why that happens? Because in that scenario, they aren’t communicating with each other. But all relationships are made on understanding. How can the two of you even be friends if you can’t understand each other? And yet, it is not within our power to be able to completely understand every feeling, emotion and thought of the other person. At that time, you need to communicate. You need to speak out. Ever thought of dropping hints?” 
He stared at her. “ You…want me to confess to her?”
She shook her head once more.“Not confess, silly. Stay completely away from Y/N for a week or two. Sort out your thoughts. And then approach her. Objectively speak out your thoughts and feelings to her. She might be taken aback by it but it’s okay, give her some time. She’ll get back to you.”
“And what if she doesn’t?” Mingyu asked. His eyes must have been showing his fear because she gave his hand a gentle squeeze before drawing it and sitting back.
“Well then she’s not the one for you, nor is she a good friend. Whether she says yes or no doesn’t matter. And judging by how you are always by her side whenever she has a breakup, I’m sure you can accept her no too. But if she runs away without any proper response, then well it’s time to move on. You are a wonderful person, Mingyu. We all want the best for you.”
He gulped. “I know. I know. But it’s just so- just so hard, you know. I just feel like I’ll lose her. I just feel like I’ll lose.”
“Lose what?”
“Y/N. My love. My best friend. My everything.”
“You mean you feel like you are a lose-her.”
“Julia.” He said, though he couldn’t help but crack a smile.
“Okay, okay. Sorry. But don’t worry. In that one week you’ll stay away from her to organise yourself, I’ll be there with you and help you out. And I’ll make sure all the twelve of us do. You have to, Mingyu. You have to. You have to take a break from her. And think about everything clearly.” 
He smiled at her more brightly this time, head clearing up. She was right. “Yeah, yeah. I will. I will, don’t worry. What would I do without you? What would we do without you?”
“I know right.” She said, all the seriousness from a minute ago gone as she stuffed an entire piece of bread in her mouth. “This is why Minghao set you up on a date with me.”
“For the last time,” Mingyu groaned, “this isn’t a date. It’s a self realisation therapy from my pathetic love life.”
“-self realisation therapy from your pathetic love life.”
The two of them stared at each other as they said the exact same thing at the same time, before bursting out into laughter.
“See?” Julia said after a while, laughter slowly bubbling away. “You are already getting better as you slowly realise.”
“Yeah, sure.” Mingyu said. “Now let’s just hope Wonwoo or Joshua doesn’t kill me tomorrow itself when they find out about today’s plan.”
“By the way,” She said, biting into the last morsel of bread. “I’m curious about my job offer. Why did Wonwoo ask me if I wanted to become his secretary? Not that I’m complaining since I’ve always been envious of the projects Seokmin, Seungkwan, Joshua and you used to do but yeah, I’m just curious because this was quite sudden.”
“Oh that.” Mingyu coughed, not sure how he was supposed to answer this question when it could lead to his partial balding in case Julia pulled his hair in anger. “So, um, Joshua. He, uh, he had sex with Wonwoo’s old secretary so I guess he wants you to keep an eye on-”
“He did what?!” She spluttered, proceeding to stand up and then froze, eyes looking at something behind Mingyu in horror. 
Just as Mingyu was about to turn to see what had happened, someone behind him let out a yell.
“Taehyung, I already told you no!” 
The familiar voice caused him to turn faster than he had expected, and he nearly jumped out of his seat to get to you. In two strides he was by your side, yanking the man’s hand away from your arm.
He could feel your shocked face on him but he ignored it, choosing the focus on the man in his grip who was making his blood seethe in anger. “What the fuck,” he said, his voice coming out much lower than he had expected, “Do you think you are doing?”
“And who the fuck are you?” The man glared, trying to yank his hand out of Mingyu’s grasp but he just tightened it, not letting the man budge even a bit. Through the corner of his eyes, he could see a few staff come over to them to break the fight, but all he could see was red, especially when your next few words came out in a scared whisper. 
“G-Gyu.” You whispered and he felt a small tugging at his elbow. “You don’t have to-”
“Gyu? Oh, so you are Gyu? Well fuck off asshole before I beat the shit out of you for ending everything between us.”
“We ended because of you.” You said and Taehyung snarled at you, causing Mingyu to give his hand another squeeze, diverting Taehyung’s attention back to him. 
“You were just fucking paranoid, you bastard. Don’t even try to blame it on others. Y/N’s better off without you.”
“Oh yeah?” He sneered. “And how would you know that considering the fact you are the reason we broke up?”
What? As if I could even make a move on Y/N. But instead he said, “Is that so? Well good for her then. My girlfriend doesn’t need to date insecure idiots like you.” 
Mingyu felt the air around him drop as the three people around him (Julia had managed to pry you off him) stared at him, but he just prayed that you wouldn’t look very surprised and give away the lie.
In fact, he was sure Taehyun would begin laughing at their faces but that seemed to do the trick. His eyes darted between Mingyu and you, sputtering out words as his face reddened with each passing second.
“You- you- you cheater!” He began, pointing an accusing finger at you. “You liar, you slu-”
“That’s enough.” Mingyu growled, grabbing Taehyung’s collar to drag him out of the restaurant, which wasn’t so hard considering the differences in their builds (he never thought that going to the gym would help him out in this way). Once outside, he let go of the other man, eyeing him disgustedly.
“Stay away from Y/N.” He said flatly, pushing the man a little when he tried to hurl himself at Mingyu. He saw Julia and you come down through the stairs slowly, the former holding you gently as you made your way down. “If not, I’ll call the police on you and maybe even get a restraining order.”
“Fuck, a restraining order just because I want to get back to her? You are as fucking messed up as that bitch.” He growled.
“I will call the police right now if you don’t stop calling my girlfriend names like that. Besides, what you are doing is stalking. So get lost now before I actually remove the front two teeth of yours.”
Holding his wrist gingerly, Taehyung gave the trio another disgruntled group, before turning the other direction and walking away, muttering something about mental people ending up together.
As Mingyu watched his figure disappear down the street, he could feel the adrenaline rush quickly disappearing from his veins. The cool night air pressed against him as he felt his body temperature finally come down from its previous risen state, chest rising up and down as he tried to control his breathing slowly.
Mingyu turned to look at you, and felt his heart clench painfully as he took in your shrunken appearance, nodding vigorously as Julia whispered into your ear, rubbing circles on your back. Walking up to you, he took your hands in his and sighed, before asking, “Are you okay?”
Your eyes darted to his and stayed there, lips slightly parted, taking in his features as though it was the first time you were seeing him. You stared at him for a few seconds before Mingyu asked again, feeling worry cloud his mind. “Y/N?”
Saying your name seemed to snap you out of your trance as you jerked away from him, removing your hands from his as you rubbed your arms.
“Yeah.” You said, your voice strained as your eyes roamed over his face with an unreadable expression. Now he was getting really worried. What else had Taehyung done to you? Had it happened before? Though Mingyu knew about your obsessive ex, you had never mentioned to him about Taehyung disturbing you before. 
“Yeah, I’m fine.” You said, finally looking down. “Thank you for pretending to be…my boyfriend.” The way you said ‘my boyfriend’ sounded foreign to Mingyu’s ears, like you were having difficulty pronouncing it. It did hurt him a bit but he was more preoccupied by the way you were acting.
He sighed, taking off his jacket and draping it over your shoulders. “You are not fine.” 
“I- I-” You opened your mouth to speak but then closed it, as though still trying to figure out whether or not you were okay. Mingyu could see your mind running in a million different directions so he figured it would be better if you could slowly jot down your thoughts in a more comfortable place.
Turning to Julia, he said, “I’m taking Y/N back home. I’ll drop you on the way, okay?”
“No, it’s okay. I’ll take a cab. Don’t worry about me. Just get Y/N back home safely, okay?” She said, already taking out her phone to book an Uber. With a jolt, Mingyu suddenly realised how much Julia had grown up and that she was no longer the small girl who used to peep into her older brother’s room through the curtains.  
“Okay. But give me a call when you reach, okay?” He said as she waved them goodbye before getting into the taxi. Then turning to you, he gave his hand and you took it, though you were avoiding his eyes once more.
Even the ride back to your place was filled with silence and though Mingyu wanted to ask you about what had just happened, he could feel that your thoughts were completely preoccupied. It was only when he parked the car in front of your house did you speak up.
“Gyu.” You said, finally turning to look at him. He froze when he saw glassy your eyes were, your bottom lip trapped by your teeth as you bit onto it to prevent yourself from crying. 
“Y/N?” He asked worriedly, grabbing your hand with one hand as he cupped your face with the other. “Y/N, what’s wrong? Is it Taehyung? Did he hurt you? Has he done it before? When did it-”
“It’s not him.” You said with a sniffle, screwing your eyes shut as the first tear fell, leaning into Mingyu’s touch. He felt his heart squeeze painfully and he gently wiped away your tears with his thumb. “It’s not him. Don’t worry about him, it’s- He just happened to meet me here today and he started acting like that but it’s- but it’s-”
“It’s what?” Mingyu asked gently and you opened your eyes to look at him. Taking in another shuddering breath to control your tears, you said, “I- I just realised something this evening. And I- and I don’t know how to deal with it.”
Worry grew in him as he took in your words. “What is it? You can tell me everything, you know that, right?”
“Yeah. Yeah, I know.” You whispered, shaking your head. You placed your other hand on his and gave it a squeeze, as though trying to find comfort in his touch. “I don’t even know how to say it though. I- I think I will mess it up.”
“Okay. Okay. It’s okay.” He whispered, slowly rubbing small circles on the back of your hand in an attempt to calm you down. “Breath with me. Breath Y/N. It’s going to be okay. I’m there right here. I’ll always be there for you.” 
“I know. I know. I just- don’t know what to do about it.” You rambled, still crying.
Mingyu’s mind was in a whirlwind. For the first time in twenty years, he couldn’t understand what you were talking about, what you were implying or what was making you cry. 
It was certainly not Taehyung. And it was definitely not something he had said or else you would have been uncomfortable around him. So what had happened this evening that had broken you down like this?
“Gyu.” You sobbed, leaning into the crook of his neck as you buried your face in his shoulder. “Gyu, I’m so sorry for this. I’m so so sorry.” Sorry for what? “Promise me you’ll never hate me. I can never hate you too. I’ll love you forever. But promise me you’ll love me forever too. No matter what happens. 
“I promise.” He said, the only response from you being your sobs getting louder as you dug your fingers into his shoulder deeply. And unlike all the other promises Mingyu had made to you, he intended to keep this one.
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“Hi.” Mingyu said with a smile, extending his umbrella over your head as he came and stood beside you. Though you were not getting wet, he could see that you were shivering slightly from the cold, rubbing your arms as the rain dripped from the narrow beam sheltering you and fell into the puddle forming right in front of both of you.
You looked up at him just as you sucked in a breath sharply, staring at him with such wide eyes that your pupils were completely blown out. He cocked his head to a side worriedly, smile faltering a little as you continued to stare at him. 
“Y/N?” He asked softly, taking a step closer until he could wrap an arm around your waist. “Are you okay?”
You blinked at him, looking away shyly as you muttered a small ‘yeah’, finger digging into your arms as you tried hiding your face from him. Mingyu frowned, taken aback by the sudden change of behaviour. Were you shy in front of him?
“Hey.” He said, this time a bit more louder as he gently tugged you towards him until he was practically hugging you, resting his chin on top of your head. He moved his arm up to your elbow, rubbing small circles on it, causing you to let out a sigh as you finally turned to him, burying your face into his neck. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” You muttered, wrapping your arms around his torso as though trying to engulf yourself in his warmth completely. He felt his heart squeeze at your endearing action, a chuckle escaping him as he let you stay in that position, enjoying the sound of rain.
“Is it Taehyung?” He finally asked, breaking the silence after a while. Your head shot up as you looked at him in surprise, as though caught completely off guard by his question. “Tae- What? No! Of course not. Don’t worry, I haven’t had the time to think about him.”
Mingyu hummed in response, asking you to go on. You rested your head against his shoulder once again, pausing a little as though thinking about how to go on. “I’ve been thinking about…something. Something else. A lot of things actually, so uh, I’ve been feeling tired for the past few days.” 
“Care to tell me what’s running in your pretty head so that I can lessen your burden?” He felt you relax into his touch but then stiffen almost immediately, slowly slipping out of his grip. He let the arm holding you drop as you made some space between the two of you, still close enough for him to feel your body warmth. 
He watched you with worry as you chewed on your lips, before looking at him with a rather obviously forced smile. “Nope, you unfortunately can’t.” You said, the smile still plastered on your face. “It’s work related so of course it’s out of your domain.”
“Okay…” He said slowly, still uncertain but deciding to drop the subject for now. “So, uh, you said Chaewon wanted to see me?”
“She wanted to see us.” You corrected and even though you had meant it as a joke, Mingyu’s mind couldn’t help but replay that night when you had said us was the special thing you had wanted to show and he felt his heart lighten up a bit at the reminder of it.
But in front of you, he rolled his eyes. “Fine, us. Why did she want to meet us?”
You shrugged. "Said she had to give us somethi-"
"Mingyu!" Someone called him just as he felt a new arm drape around his neck, its owner wedging herself between him and you. He blinked for a second as the heavy smell of perfume and loss of warmth overtook him, before smiling back at the woman flashing all her teeth at him. "How are you?"
"I'm good. What about you, Chaewon?" He asked, gently detaching himself from her powerful grip. "How's work?"
"It's being a pain in the ass so of course I'm not fine." She said with a laugh that Mingyu too returned (politely). “Anyways, I’ve got a surprise for both of you!” 
“Yeah, yeah. You’ve been going on and on about the surprise but what is it actually? You said, rolling your eyes a bit. Mingyu had never realised how cute you looked when you were annoyed but right now, you looked absolutely adorable, with your eyebrows slightly knotted together as you huffed out a breath. 
“So…” Chaewon drawled, looking at either of them once before pulling out something from her pocket. “I got you us tickets for the 9Muses!” 
Mingyu blinked at her, feeling his cheeks pull into a smile as a new found excitement erupted in his heart. “Wait- 9Muses? Really?” 
Chaewon smiled back at him superiorly as she waved four tickets in front of his face. “Yeah, yeah. I know, I’m awesome. You can thank me later on when you and your future girlfriend finally hit off.”
The last statement caused him to pause, eyes darting to you as a force of habit before looking back at Chaewon in surprise. “Future…girlfriend?” 
She meant you, right? It wasn’t the first time people had mistaken the two of you for a couple but Chaewon had known you since college which could only mean that she was referring to-
“I’ve set you up for a blind date!” She said excitedly, but Mingyu could feel the colour draining from his face as an ugly sensation rose up his throat. “That’s why I actually have four tickets-”
“You did what?” You asked, causing him to look at you in surprise. You were looking at Chaewon in complete shock with your mouth slightly open, as though you could not believe what she had just done. Chaewon too seemed to be taken aback by your reaction, because her next few sentences came out in a stammer. 
“I- I thought- You told me you were sad that Mingyu was never in a relationship so I thought- “
“I-” You began, but stopped when you looked at him, immediately averting your eyes to the ground instead. Something was wrong. Something was bothering you from the very beginning but Mingyu could tell that something about this proposal had upset you even more. But what was it? Did you not want to go to the concert? 
“Yeah. Yeah I did say that.” Then looking up at him, you gave him a smile, though he could see that you were battling with something deep inside. “You should totally take that person out as you date. Who knows, you both might hit it off really well, huh?”
Even though he had prepared himself for this very situation many times before, these words coming from you still hit him with a blow. It had been years since he had gone on a date with your friend Suji and yet it still hurt him freshly that you were this eager to give him away to someone else so readily. He was still okay with you always dating someone else but everytime you would try to get him to go out with someone, it would hurt him even more.
But instead, he smiled back at you and nodded to your words. “Yeah, who knows? We might actually end up dating.” 
You laughed at his statement, hitting him on the shoulder lightly. “Oh my god, I can’t wait to babysit my nephews and nieces.”
“Excuse me?” Mingyu gasped, giving you a look of disgust. “That’s too far, don’t you think?” 
“Well, you are such a gentleman that it would be stupid for anyone to let you go.” Chaewon commented with a smile and Mingyu felt his cheeks heat up a little. 
“It’s nothing like that.” He muttered. He felt you reach out for his hand and give it a squeeze, causing him to look at you. You smiled at him softly, before saying, “Don’t say that, Gyu. You are the kindest and sweetest person in this world. Anyone would want to be with a wonderful person like you.”
Then why don’t you want to?
But before he could retort to your compliment that had him almost weak in his knees, Chaewon clapped both of you on your backs. “Okay, then! It’s decided. I’ll send you the details later on, Mingyu. See you on Sunday!” 
“Yeah, bye!” Mingyu waved at the two of you as Chaewon produced an umbrella (practically out of nowhere) and wrapped an arm around you and darted across the street. He watched the two of you with a smile as you struggled to keep up with your friend’s pace, finally breaking free from her grasp when you both reached the other end. Turning back, you waved at him one final time before slipping into your car.
He waited for your car to completely disappear down the street before stepping out into the rain himself, his heart weighing down more and more with each step he took. 
Time to brace yourself again, Mingyu. 
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“Perfume. Check. Breath mints. Check. Keys. Check.” Mingyu muttered, going over his things that he was supposed to carry one last time before he actually left. Glancing at the mirror one last time, he smiled to himself, patting down his hair to fix his hairstyle.
Be happy, Mingyu! You are going to a 9Muses concert. And you look fine. 
Then why doesn’t Y/N think I look good?
The very reminder of you brought up the bile to his throat, his smile dropping almost immediately as he let out a sigh. Exhausted, he crashed onto his sofa massaging his throbbing temples that had been hurting ever since Friday due to his complicated thoughts.
He was going to go to the concert of his favourite band. With you. And with a pretty girl that could potentially be his future girlfriend if things went well tonight. 
Then why did he feel like throwing up at the very thought of holding someone else’s hand that wasn’t you? Why did his skin crawl at the thought of smiling, laughing and flirting with someone that wasn’t you?
He felt so sick that a small part of him didn’t even want to go to the concert now. The fact that he would be on a date with another girl with you right beside him was suffocating him so much that he really felt like he was going to die.
He could feel himself shrinking back to his fifteen year old self, when he was on a date and he felt like throwing up. Back then he didn’t know why. But now that he did, it felt even more worse. 
Mingyu glanced at the clock on his wall, before closing his eyes to calm himself down. He still had an hour to go and pick up Yoobin and then drive to the concert. If he could just-
The doorbell suddenly rang, jerking him out of his thoughts and he sat up straight, frozen as to what to do next.
Who could it be at this time? He wasn’t expecting anyone. It certainly wasn’t Wonwoo as he had gone for a week to live with his parents. Lately, there had been a lot of burglaries in his neighbourhood. It couldn’t be…?
“Snap out of it.” He muttered, slapping himself lightly before getting up to go and get the door. He was sure that it was a dinner delivery at the wrong address and swung open the door, ready to tell the delivery man he was at the wrong house. 
But when he opened the door, he found himself staring at you, you who were completely dressed up for the concert and definitely not supposed to be here, you who looked so stunning that Mingyu momentarily forgot to speak until you broke the silence. 
“Don’t go out with her.”
“What?” Mingyu asked, snapping out of his reverie as he tried processing your statement. What were you talking about?
You took a step closer to him and repeated your statement. “Don’t go out with her. Yoobin. Don’t go out with her.”
You reached out to him but all he could react to your statement was by taking a step back instead, feeling even more confused about what you were talking about.
“What do you mean? What’s wrong?” He asked. You opened your mouth and closed it, before taking in another step towards him so that you were inside the house now. 
Taking in a shaky breath, you whispered. “Please don’t go out with her, Gyu. I know it’s very selfish of me but I-”
Swiftly, Mingyu closed the door behind you before pulling you close to him by your waist, cupping your face in his hands. “Hey,” he whispered, as you froze in his touch, eyes going glassy with tears. He could feel himself panicking at the thought that maybe someone had hurt you badly but he tried to keep himself calm. “What’s wrong? Tell me what’s wrong, love. You’ve been acting so different these few days and now this-”
“It’s because I love you.” You choked, tears finally streaming down your cheeks. “I love you, Gyu. I love you. I love you so, so much.”
Now it was Mingyu’s time to freeze. His brain seemed to slow down by a million years as a loud ringing filled his ears instead, stomach dropping like he was on a roller coaster. What did you just say?
You covered his hands with yours, gently removing them from your cheeks and holding them in yours instead as you whispered. “I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry Mingyu. I know I’m really selfish but please don’t go out-”
The rest of your rambling was completely cut off as he smashed his lips against yours, fireworks immediately exploding in his heart. He felt you drop his hands as you wrapped it around his arms, fingernails digging into his skin as you held onto him while you kissed him back as passionately as he was kissing you. Every bit of Mingyu’s perception was drowned out as you took over his senses, and the only thing he could think and feel was you, you and you.
He ran his one hand fervently against your back while the other pulled you impossibly closer by your waist. His entire skin tingled as you ran your mouth over his again and again, tangling your finger in his locks. 
Mingyu couldn’t believe it. He just couldn’t believe it. If it wasn’t for the excess blood pumping to his ears and his heart threatening to swell and burst out of love and happiness, he would have been sure that this was just a dream. 
Finally, you pulled away, gasping for breath, and the loss of warmth caused him to chase after your lips, desperate to get back that euphoric feeling of kissing you.
You laughed lightly as you placed a hand over his chest to stop him, tears once again flowing down your cheeks. Mingyu rested his forehead against yours, cupping your face gently with one hand as you leaned in to his touch even more. 
“I waited for you so long.” He whispered, and you screwed your eyes shut, nodding to his statement. “I loved you for so, so long. So long.”
“I’m sorry.” You whispered back, opening his eyes to look at him. “I’m so sorry I never realised I loved you and even when I did, I didn’t approach you.”
At this, Mingyu shook his head, resting both of his hands on the small of your back as you cupped his face, staring at him so softly and with so much love that he could feel his knees going weak. “Don’t apologise. I just- I just wish that I had kissed you in a more romantic setting-”
“Oh, Gyu.” You said, brushing your lips against his, causing his brain to short circuit once again. “This was the best kiss I’ve ever had. It’s you who made it so romantic. Doesn’t matter that I barged into your house an hour before we left.”
“I think it should matter.” He said with a pout. “After all, you did barge into my house.” 
You pressed a quick kiss on his lips in response. “And what should I do to make up for it, baby?” 
Mingyu didn’t think it was possible to fall in love with you more than he already was but somehow, impossibly, you calling him baby had him falling for you even more. The entire world around him had dimmed as he could see only your face, eyes shining and lips quirked in a cocky smile. 
He didn’t even realise he was staring at you until you reached up and kissed him softly again, closing his mouth that had been slightly open. “Gyu.” You murmured. “I asked you a question.”
“Huh?” He asked, too busy kissing you back. Was your heart supposed to dance like this whenever you kissed someone? He wasn’t even sure if his stomach dropping so much as your hands ran over his back was a good sign.
“I asked what I should do to make it up to you.” 
Oh. His eyes flicked to your lip gloss smudged lips, which were swollen and this time Mingyu felt a different kind of feeling spark in his heart. A desire to ruin you even more. 
“Well,” he said, kissing the corner of your lips. “You could let me worship you.” Another kiss on your jawline, causing you to sigh. The sound shot up a shiver down his spine and he wondered if he would be able to survive even the night. “Let me show you how much I’ve loved and wanted you for all these years.”
“Yes, but,” you said, pushing yourself away from him. “I should be the one making up to you.” Saying that, you pushed him, not too hard, but enough for him to stumble back and fall on the sofa (thank god the sofa happened to be there. Mingyu wasn’t sure if he would be able to live with the embarrassment had he fallen on his ass instead.)
He watched you in awe as you climbed onto his lap, straddling him as you wrapped your arms around his neck and he found himself grabbing you by your waist to pull you in closer. You looked so sexy that Mingyu was sure he had ascended to heaven.
You leaned down to capture his lips in yours again, feeling your thumb gently stroke his jawline. He could taste your lip gloss, igniting that fire in the pit of his stomach again as he licked your bottom lip to get more of it. 
You opened your mouth a little more and his tongue accidentally slipped in, and Mingyu couldn't help but dig his nails into your skin in an attempt to cover up his groan. Your mouth was so wet and warm against his, tongue gliding over each other’s as you both fought for dominance.
He quickly broke the kiss, before moving to kiss the soft skin right below your ears.
“Gyu…” You hummed, the sound sending a shiver through his dick. He really wanted to elicit more of those sounds from you now, so he grazed his teeth lightly into the skin, causing a gasp to escape you. Immediately he soothed the area with his tongue, your gasp turning into a very low moan as pulled at the locks of his hair near his neck. “Gyu, I love you so much.”
“I love you too. I’ve always loved you, angel. And I’ll love you forever.” He whispered back, leaving trails of kisses on your neck as he moved downwards, finally stopping at the hollow of your neck. By now, he had realised that the best way to get you undone was by grazing his teeth against your skin and then soothing the area with his tongue. 
But when you shifted slightly on his lap to move even more closer for him, he felt his dick twitch and another groan escaped him. It felt so good, and so, so right doing this with you, whatever the two of you were even doing. Your head was completely thrown back as Mingyu marked love bites all over your neck, gripping on his hair as you grinded down on him. Your moans had gotten much louder by now and with each sound he got out of you, he could feel his dick getting harder and harder. 
Each time your cunt rubbed against his dick, mingyu felt a small relief wash over him but it just wasn’t enough; he wanted more of it, more of you and he wanted you to want him equally as much. 
“Gyu.” You whispered, all of a sudden, causing him to pause. He looked at you with widened eyes, panic gripping him that he had done something wrong. “What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?”
“Can you- can you take off your shirt? If you are okay with it? Or else-”
“Yeah, I’m okay with it, princess. A hundred percent okay. Okay with whatever you do.” He said, reaching downward to pull off his shirt but felt your hands stop him, causing him to look at you in surprise.
You were looking at him with guilt and a bit of sadness, before you reached down to press a soft kiss on his lips.
“Don’t say that, Gyu. Don’t say that, please. I’ve been hurting you all these years. Knowingly or unknowingly. So don’t- don’t say that, okay? I’ll make it up to you. I promise.” You said.
For some reason, Mingyu felt his heart soften at your words. It was like a huge knot that had tangled his heart, not allowing it to beat and causing him pain for all these years had finally opened, releasing him from all pain. He smiled at you and nodded, and you slowly let go of his arms, allowing him to take off his shirt finally.
Mingyu always knew he had a great build. He took pride in how well he took care of his body and was kind of used to people complimenting him.
But nothing prepared him for the way you were looking at him right now, like he was some god who had just materialised in front of you. As soon as his shirt was off you sucked in a deep breath, your teeth sinking into your lower lips. Your eyes flicked all over his body, pupils darkening as you took in his physique.
He had never felt so bare in front of anyone and yet, it felt really good being like this in front of you. You lifted your hand slightly and placed it in front of his chest, looking at him for permission. When he nodded a yes, you let your hand finally touch, fingers trailing gently over his toned chest.
It was like you had set his skin ablaze; he could feel where your fingers had trailed against his now warm skin. A low moan escaped his throat when you gently brushed your finger against his nipple, causing you to smirk. Fuck, you were so hot.
“You are so handsome, baby. And so, so hot.” You said, leaning down to kiss his jaw this time. Another moan escaped him as you too repeated his action, sucking on the soft skin of his neck before licking it with your tongue. Your hands that were roaming all over his body were making his skin hotter with each second, which was doing nothing to give relief to his achingly hard dick. 
“Can you take these off for me too?” You asked sweetly, tugging at his belt. Though he was mildly annoyed that you had climbed off his lap, resulting in the loss of your touch, he quickly jumped off the sofa and undid his belt, shimmering out of his jeans before turning to look back at you.
Your eyes now flicked all over his body as you took in his entire appearance, and he felt his dick twitch under your gaze. Your eyes then moved up to meet his, smiling so tenderly at him that Mingyu had to sit back down to make sure he didn’t melt into a puddle then and there. You climbed back onto his lap, straddling him as you wrapped your arms around his neck.
“Hi, love.” You whispered with a smile, bumping your nose against his. 
“Hi.” Mingyu said, mirroring back your smile. 
“Can I ride you?” 
He found himself nodding to your question, anticipation eating away his heart as you tugged onto the band of his underwear, and he raised his hips a little as you both pulled it off. A tiny bit of relief flooded him as his hard dick sprang free, finally able to breath a little.
Mingyu watched you as you took him in with hooded eyes, letting out a sigh of relief as you brushed your thumb against his now angry red tip, already leaking with precum. 
“Aren’t you- Aren’t you going to take off your clothes?” He asked and you shook your head in negative. “After some time. You’re so pretty, Gyu.” You replied, wrapping your hand around his length and giving it a gentle squeeze. He thought he could see stars as his head fell back with a groan, hips jerking up to chase your hand as you removed it.
“Don’t tease me.” He hadn’t meant it to come out as a whimper, just as a request, but right now he was so desperate for you that he didn’t care if he sounded this pathetic. 
“Sorry baby.” You said, but you were smirking, clearly enjoying the power play here. And for that reason, that made him even harder (if that was even possible) for you. You raised your hip up and slipped your hand underneath your skirt to pull your panties aside. 
Then slowly, you sunk down. He felt your warm and wet pussy envelope just his tip, and a groan ripped from his throat at the feeling. Your hips too stuttered as you let out a moan, pausing to take in a deep breath. Mingyu could see that you were fighting with yourself to not sink in completely from the way your nails were digging into his shoulders. 
He didn’t know what came over him but he was so done with playing gentleman with you, so tired of not being able to feel you fully, so sick of keeping himself away from you that he found himself grabbing your hips and pulling you down as slowly as he could.
When you finally bottomed out, the two of you letting out a moan in unison. Mingyu’s eyes rolled back as he felt your warm walls flutter around his length, trying to adjust to the size. The erratic squeezing was not helping him keep his composure and he could already feel his balls squeezing, ready to let go any second from now.
“Mingyu.” He heard you whine, the sound shooting straight up to his brain as his eyes snapped open to look at you. You looked back at him with complete adoration, and Mingyu felt his insides melt, leaning towards you to capture your lips in his.
The kiss was short lived though; as you raised your hips slightly, before bringing it down with a slam. He broke the kiss to groan loudly against your lip as your pussy clenched around his length once more, before you swallowed his moans with another kiss. 
He felt your hot tongue slip into his mouth, drowning all his moans as you raised your hips once again and brought it down. Gently, you picked up the pace, a small pressure forming in his lower abdomen. 
“You’re so beautiful, do you know that?” You whispered, his moans increasing as you sucked his lower lip. “So, so beautiful and so perfect. I love you so much Mingyu.” 
Mingyu felt his balls tighten at your words, the knot in his stomach growing tighter and tighter as you whispered soft praises into the skin of his neck, sucking and marking at the soft skin. 
“I love you. I love you too.” He whimpered back, burying his face into the crook of your neck. You ran your hand through the strands of his hair as he clutched your waist, trying to find something to ground himself too. The coil was getting too tight, too tight for him to hold himself back and you squeezing the life out of his dick was definitely not helping the situation. 
“Are you- are you close, Gyu?” You asked, and he nodded. You felt so good, just so good, with the way your warm and wet walls were pulsing around him, causing ecstasy to shoot through his veins. 
But now he could feel you slowing down a bit, obviously tired from riding him. You didn’t say anything though, and Mingyu could see you were trying to live up to your promise. So instead he relaxed into the sofa a bit more, before snapping up his hips to meet you halfway.
The sound that ripped through your throat was like music to his ears and he could feel himself threatening to burst, body threatening to snap under the intensity of pressure he was feeling.
“Baby-” He gasped. “Baby, I can’t- I can’t-”
“Let go.” You choked, slamming your lips against his to steal his breath away.
And that was enough for the coil in his stomach to snap. White hot pleasure coursed through his veins as a ringing sound took over his ears, all senses hindered as he lost himself in the bliss. Another groan stumbled out of his lips as you too finally came, doubling his pleasure as you coated his cock with your warm liquid, squeezing it as though to take in all his cum.
He wrapped his arm around you more tightly so that now both of your bodies were practically one, sweat and cum mixing with each other as both of you tried to catch your breaths. 
After some time, Mingyu felt you ruffle his hair lightly and he finally peeled away from you, only to look up at you. You gave him a tired smile and he felt his heart squeeze, wondering for the millionth time how he had ended up with an angel like you. 
“Hi.” You giggled, brushing your nose against his as you fondly cupped his cheeks. 
He felt himself melt into your touch as he smiled back, quickly pressing a soft kiss against your lips. “What just happened?”
You laughed at his question and wrapped your arms around his neck, engulfing him in your scent as he buried his face into your neck.. The two of you stayed like that for sometime, just enjoying each other’s presence as the only sound heard was your rapid heartbeats and the sound of your slightly laboured breaths.
“I love you, Mingyu. Always had.”
“Hmm?” He hummed, kissing your collar bone. 
“Yeah. I realised that’s why I could never be in a happy relationship with anyone. And why they always complained that I wasn’t interested in them.” Your voice had dropped a little and he could sense your sadness, so he began rubbing soft circles on your back to calm you down. “I kept searching for you in them. I kept searching for you. And- and all this time- all this time I-”
“Shhh. It’s okay princess.” He whispered, looking up to meet your eyes. He smiled at you gently. “It’s okay princess. We are here together now, and that’s all that matters.”
You stared at him for a second, before whispering. “I hurt you.”
“You also hurt yourself, baby. But now, we can help each other out. We can pick up our broken pieces and fix them. This time, together.”
“Oh Mingoo.” You said with a soft smile. The old nickname reignited a flame in his chest, and all of a sudden, all the years he had spent with you, all the beautiful and sad memories the two of you had created together flashed before his eyes. “What did I do to get you?”
“No, what did I do to get you?” 
You giggled, leaning down to kiss his chin. “Thank you for waiting for me, Gyu.”
“What happened to Mingoo?”
“I thought you hated it.”
“I could never hate anything about you or anything that you call me.”
“So…I can call you mine?”
“Okay, stop.” He groaned, and you let out a laugh. “You’re terrible at jokes.” 
“God, and you think you’re very funny right?” You wiggled your eyebrows at him, as though it was a challenge.
“Of course! Do you know how many girls have come up to me at work and told me I’m so funny?” 
“There are no girls at your work. Only four other guys who bully you like shit.” 
“Fine, at cafes.”
“Don’t lie- Oh!” Your eyes widened in horror and Mingyu felt his stomach drop, panic seizing him. “What’s wrong? Did I hurt-”
“The concert! Your date!” You gasped, hitting him slightly on the shoulder. Then you began climbing off his lap but he caught you and moved you back, hands firmly on your waist as you struggled slightly. “Gyu, we’ll be late-”
“Oh, I don’t think we can go to the concert anyways. I’ll just text Yoobin about it.” You froze at his words, looking at him in complete surprise. “What do you mean?” 
“You still have to make it up to me.” 
Mingyu could see the gears turning in his head as you took in his words, before your lips broke into a smirk. “Right. Right, I do. But what about 9Muses? Aren’t they your favourite band?”
“No 9Muses can compare to me spending time with you. Besides, I can go to a million other concerts now that you are by my side.”
You laughed at his response, before asking, “Can we move to a more comfortable room then, sir?”
He felt his cock which was still inside your warm pussy stir to life once more at the nickname, and his head filled up with thoughts of how he could fill you up once again, make you feel good and make you his forever.
“Of course love. Can I- Can I ask you a question?” He asked as you got off him, nodding at his question as you tried to stand with your shaking legs. Mingyu quickly caught you before you stumbled and you wrapped your arms around him and smiled softly, almost causing him to fall instead because of just how pretty you looked. And because of just how much he loved you.
“Remember- remember our promise? To marry each other if we were still single when we are thirty? Will you- Would you-”
You cut off his statement by pressing your lips against his, but this was unlike any other of the kisses the two of you had just shared. This one was the softest, and yet the most loving kiss Mingyu had ever been given. He felt himself completely surrender to your unspoken confession, letting you glide your hand over his chest until you were cupping his chin, his own hands wrapped around your waist and back, engulfing you with his large body. A tiny realisation flickered at the back of his brain; that he was completely naked while you hadn’t taken off a single article of clothing, not even your panties, but something about your kiss made him feel safe and protected, as though being vulnerable was out of the question.
The two of your lips moved against each other ever so softly, like you had all the time in this world to make for what you had lost over the years. He could feel his heart swelling with love, and he felt his stomach drop with happiness when he felt your heartbeat racing too. 
Finally, you broke apart the kiss, looking up to him with soft, tender eyes. The fairy lights behind you were giving you a soft glow, and Mingyu was sure that he had just fallen for you even more. 
“Marry you?” You asked, and he found himself nodding at your question. For some reason, he was no longer scared of your rejection, and the sense of doubt vanished completely when you smiled at him softly. “Yes. Yes I will, Kim Mingyu. I’ll marry you any day and any time. I’ll marry you even if the world says no, even if the world is ending or even if we have to move far away from each other. I love you so much that I’ll marry you in a blink. You are the person I’m a thousand percent sure of. And I’ll marry you even with paper rings.”
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A/N: Please do tell me what you think about this story!! I worked really hard on it and I would love to know everyone’s thoughts on it~ Comments and reblogs are appreciated!  
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© 𝐆𝐘𝐔-𝐄𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑  
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apothecareful · 2 years
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just reached the OUAGHHHH stage in the artistic process
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drchucktingle · 26 days
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Hello Dr Tingle! I wanted to ask you about that re: your post about how all your books are serious literature (hell yeah Love is real). How do you personally deal with the whole traditional publishing institution? It attracts a whole different level of coverage and it seems that they're very quick to try and box you and like turn you into a brand. Is it stiffling? Is it freeing? Does the attention help more people understand your trot? I don't know I've never been published but since you have experience in both traditional and self publishing I'm interested in knowing how that's feeling for you
well this is a pretty complex question with lots of different trots but i will try my best to answer. lets start with WHO I AM as buckaroo name of chuck
what i create has a very strong voice and my way is pretty recognizable. while buckaroos do not know what most authors look like, i REALLY stand out in a dang crowd with a big pink bag on my head. if you see 50 random author photos and mine is mixed in and then you ask 'which photo do you remember the most?' it is probably gonna be chuck. i also have a VERY UNIQUE STORY with what i create and my artistic sensibilities, not a lot of buds are out there making trans mothman erotica along with their big five traditional publishing bestsellers (SIDENOTE preorder BURY YOUR GAYS)
now if you were going to take 'CHUCK TINGLE' to a marketing department they would FALL OVER BACKWARDS IN THEIR DANG CHAIR with excitement. it is hard to think of an author with a stronger BRAND than i already have in the sense of 'instantly recognizable trot and specific unique style'. even in answering this you can tell that i dont even TALK like other dang authors.
what i am getting at is this: i am VERY VERY LUCKY because my existence just so happens to equate to what a company would see as GOOD BRANDING. it is not intentional on my part, it is just the hand of fate i guess. im out here expressing myself in a FULL ON WAY that is PRETTY DANG STRANGE TO SOME and it just so happens to work as mainstream branding too
on paper you might think 'what the heck no way chuck tingle will fly as a mainstream trot' but honestly the main thread of this timeline can be surprising sometimes. ive been saying the key ingredient for years and i will say it again: LOVE AND SINCERITY RESONATE. when you make art with this fuel, the timeline will feel it. when you stand up tall and shout with your whole chest THIS IS MY WAY AND I LOVE MYSELF. I AM THE WORLDS GREATEST AUTHOR TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT, the timeline will listen
so all that said, i do not mind the idea of myself as 'brand' because i am not CHANGING myself to create this effect. what some might see as 'brand' i just see as another part of my art. i have always believed that art is THE WHOLE EXPERIENCE not just the painting but what is outside of the frame. WHO I AM is just as important as the books i write, and interacting with my way is a whole MULTIMEDIA experience that INCLUDES YOU TOO. it is the feeling when your friend shows you your first tingler cover, or the feeling when you realize that i am not playing a character. this is ALL a part of the tingleverse and it is all a part of my honest raw expression as a queer and neurodivergent buckaroo.
YOU ARE PART OF THIS ART TOO
it is my nature of have a PUNK ROCK trot. always has been. but to me that does not mean just angrily going against everything for the sake of going against everything. for me, this punk rock trot means fighting to EXPRESS MYSELF IN THE MOST HONEST AND PURE FORM POSSIBLE and to create the art that i want to make without any boundaries
somehow i have threaded the needle in this really interesting once-in-a-dang-lifetime kind of way. my pure punk rock self as an OUTERSIDER ARTIST just so happens to resonate with this larger system of brand and traditional publishing and popular culture. i COULD reject this, but rejecting it would be LESS HONEST.
this is just who i am. i LIKE pop culture. i LIKE joy. i LIKE dressing in all pink and wearing my custom suits. I LIKE PROVING LOVE IS REAL WHAT THE HECK ELSE EVEN IS THERE? i love being a queer outsider artist and using my small voice to shout at the big bad devils and i like that every time i shout a few more of you buckaroos join the chorus and together we are just getting louder and louder and louder and WHO KNOWS what comes next for us all trotting together.
when i post something like 'WHAT A GREAT DAY TO PROVE LOVE' it is not me sitting here in a bad mood thinkin 'well i gotta make todays post to keep up with my brand'. i am ACTUALLY FEELING THAT FEELING and i actually believe it with every fiber of my being. honestly, half the time i post about the beauty of this timeline i am probably over here literally crying tears of joy (chuck is an emotional bud i get riled over the joy of existence A LOT)
and heres the best part of this trot: because i really have this punk rock way it makes me very powerful. others can pretend not to care about success and brand and all that but I REALLY DO NO CARE. i would write tinglers whether buds were reading them or not, this is just my natural state, and that makes me incredibly strong. if some big corporation says 'YOU MUST DO THIS' and i dont want to do it i just say 'no thanks'. it is not some big debate about my career or anything like that because I REALLY DO NOT CARE IN THE SLIGHTEST. i care about the art
because of this, my relationship with my GIANT TRADITIONAL PUBLISHING MACHINE is great. we trot like equals and we get along really well. i tell them exactly what i want to do and they let me do it. i really do not have to answer to anyone and they deserve a huge amount of credit for respecting me in this way.
and heres the thing, THEY ALSO HAVE SOME GREAT IDEAS
SPECIFICALLY my imprint of NIGHTFIRE is very dang cool. yes, they are the head of a giant hydra of a BIG FIVE PUBLISHER, but nightfire is SO DANG ART-FOCUSED
there is no right or wrong way to be an artist, and my path is not the only one, but i can tell you what WORKS FOR ME. this is the advice i would give myself, and buckaroos can take it or leave it
here it is: never beg the big book publisher, or record label, or movie studio to pay attention to you
do not let it become a lotto ticket in your brain. do not think that you are some weak little creature and maybe if you trot just right they will scoop you up and take care of you. do not go to their door begging to be let in
LET THEM COME TO YOUR DOOR
create something so incredible and beautiful and honest and powerful and unique and important that they would be foolish to miss out. create a community or a system or a timeline or a world of imagination that thrives on its own and THEY SHOULD BE SO LUCKY TO BE A PART OF IT
then when you sit down at that board meeting it is not 'please brand me, ill do whatever you want'. instead, it is 'lets make a deal and see how much love we can prove together.'
now lets trot buckaroos
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gillgmesh · 2 years
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The Maid Alter figure I ordered came today and I knew she was a 1/7 scale but I never bought a figure before and I underestimated how tall she would be so now I'm trying to find out where to put her, thats away from the sun, but also in a spot that won't seem like I'm bragging that I have her. She's p big?? And I don't want anyone to see her (in all her bathing suit glory) and judge me hard core for having her. aka my brother.
When I move into my apartment for school though I'm taking her with me and I'll have her on the bookshelf (if there's room) in the main room. At that point I won't care who sees her. She's so pretty!!
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yuellii · 9 months
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when imitating life from art
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𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐃𝐑𝐀𝐁𝐁𝐋𝐄𝐒 of what kinds of gifts they would give you while we wait for maintenance to end !
feat. various fontaine characters, separately
note. reader’s gender not specified, not necessarily romantic but definitely can be, this is written pre-release, just something to kill the time during maintenance before fontaine drops !!
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FURINA.
random trinkets ; She’s quite sporadic, actually. Quite similar to the flamboyance of her demeanor, she does not stick to a theme when she’s gift-giving to you especially. They must be random, they must be completely new and fun every time—and that’s not a rule, it’s only like the laws of nature.
In retrospect, they’re all endearing in the end. If there’s one theme she missed, it’s that all these random trinkets pertained to you in some way, even in the oddest of aspects. Truth be told, she picked items up once they reminded her of you, and that itself was enough to excuse the weirdness of some of her presents.
LYNEY.
magic tricks ;; The gifts he gives themselves are… rather normal. But he is a person of presentation, or so he’d say. Therefore, the true uniqueness that set him aside from any other gift givers was the performance he gave alongside them.
For even the smallest of gifts—books, drinks, Mora—he insists he hides them from you first. With a wink and a grin that can be frustrating sometimes, the true present is really how hard he tries to impress you. And so, he goes out of his way to try something new every time. If you’re not impressed, absolutely astounded and amazed, then is it really a gift from him at all?
LYNETTE.
flowers ;; The irony is that Lynette hates flowers… When they’re given to her, at least. But they were always offered to her early into her career that she just associates them with goodness, and goodness, only. So in her mind, who is more deserving of flowers than you?
She doesn’t quite know flower meanings; she likely has no idea each one even had a separate connotation. But she knew that they looked pretty, and if you paid attention hard enough, you’d notice they were displayed in such a beautiful way every time she gave them to you, like she felt the need to carefully arrange them to your liking.
FREMINET.
seashells ;; ‘He sells seashells by the seashore’—not really, but he liked mumbling it to himself whenever he came by. He liked diving; pretty much everyone knew that. He liked the water; everyone knew that, too. But, he also liked to silently hand you shells he collected from his little water sessions.
If you took the time to notice all the details, you’d see that he only brings you complete shells, ones that stents cracked or broken. It’s as if he sorted them out one by one, making sure they look pristine before selecting them as the final one—and maybe, that’s truly what he does.
NEUVILLETTE.
dinner dates ;; He actually doesn’t… give you gifts. Physical ones, anyways. He’s a very serious yet interesting man, one that leaves you guessing what his next move will be.
What he does as a treat in place of a physical present is treat you out to a nice dinner, but you won’t know what days he will ask until he is already in front of you. They’re quite nice, though, as he always picks places he knows you enjoy at least a few things off the menu. And they’re quite expensive and classy, too. You’re also not quite sure if he picks these random nights based on your mood throughout the day, or based on his own selfish discretion… But honestly, you’ll never know.
WRIOTHESLEY.
tea boxes ;; The man in charge of a fleet of exiled convicts is one you’d consider to be more scruff and too barbaric of a person, but he is gentle in the way he likes his tea. It’s a form of art that calms him down from the bottom of the ocean, one that he thinks you would enjoy, too.
And so he loves giving sets of new blends he’s tried, or sometimes specific herbs to add to really make a different aroma pop more than usual. He always prefers tea over anything, and his gifts and recommendations are his way of saying he wants you to enjoy them, too.
NAVIA.
skincare ;; The lady is quite particular with the sun and the shade, the hydrating and hydro-boosting—she takes care in the art of aesthetics and believes it’s only fair that you pamper yourself, same way as she does on her own. There’s an interest she takes, one that is so particular in which she studies your type of skin just to find out what lotion would be best, or what would keep your face hydrated.
And at first, you’d think to yourself maybe it’s a bit insulting, like she needs to look better than you already do. But wish her dashing smile always so positive when she gifts them, it’s clear she has the best of intentions.
CLORINDE.
gold trinkets ;; Being a champion duelist meant many things, but one of those features implicated an eye for the golden prize. Gold was always classy, so she liked it. Love was also classy, and she liked feeling it whenever she thought of something to give to you. It was always something gold, ranging from expensive jewelry to even cheap, gold-lined trinkets.
But she thought of you when she chose it, and she thought it was pretty enough to give to you. And it felt lovely, at the very least, as if she was sharing her winning trophies.
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morganbritton132 · 9 months
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I absolutely love every time other people find something out about Steve and are just like ???
I wonder if any of his student’s parents are fans of Eddie’s but have no idea their kid’s teacher is married to him (perhaps finding out at career day 👀)
I love the thought of some rock n roll dad (aka: the guy in the minivan blaring Rage Against the Machine during morning drop off (aka: aka: my dad)) meeting his kid’s teacher during open house and seeing a picture on his desk of him and guitar legend, Eddie Munson.
Steve’s in the middle of explaining the curriculum for the year when Rock N Roll Dad points to a picture of him and Eddie backstage at the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame last year when Eddie presented like, “You like that guy?”
Steve looks from Rock N Roll Dad to the picture and then back, “Yeah, you could say that.”
Then he goes back to talking about what they should expect in terms of homework and that was that until parent/teacher conferences.
The first thing Rock N Roll Dad clocks in the new picture on Steve’s desk. It replaced the Eddie Munson one with a new one of the two of them in the parking lot after a local show. Steve’s got his arm thrown around Eddie’s neck, both of them smiling wide, and Gareth is in the background giving them bunny ears.
Rock N Roll Dad points to the framed picture like, “Pretty cool to have met ‘em.”  
“Yeah,” Steve nods. “It’s one of the best things that’s ever happened to me.”
Rock N Roll Dad is not gay himself but he is not one of those ultra straight Corroded Coffin fans that liked to pretend that half the band isn’t queer. He was actually watching the MTV Music Awards show that Eddie publicly came out at by declaring his love for some guy named Steve, and actually.
Rock N Roll Dad thought it made a lot of sense that Eddie Munson was gay because well. A lot of his songs were… phallic.
So, he knows.
He knows that Eddie Munson is gay and that he’s married to some guy whose name isn’t even listed on his Wikipedia page, and he knows that he lives in Chicago, but what he doesn’t know is why he never put two and two together and got Steve Harrington.
There’s a different picture of Eddie Munson on Mr. Harrington’s desk when Rock N Roll Dad goes to talk to him after his kid gets detention for being a little shithead. There is framed original concept art for CC’s first album on the wall behind Steve when Rock N Roll Dad checks in on his kid during a zoom study session.
Hell, Rock N Roll Dad follows Eddie on Tiktok.
He has seen the ass shots that Eddie has posted of his husband in his running shorts, and he did think, yeah, that’s a great ass. He didn’t know he was thinking that about his kid’s math teacher!!
It’s not even Career Day when he discovers it. It’s the day before when they can set up their booths in the gym because Rock N Roll Dad may be a heavy metal fan always, but he’s also an accountant from 8:30 to 4:30 Monday thru Friday.
 He’s struggling to keep his poster board up when in walks guitar legend, Eddie Munson. He’s carrying a box, following behind a guy carrying an iguana.
Rock N Roll Dad abandons everything and walks over to the booth across the way. He can hear the two bickering with each other but before he can say anything, Steve Harrington is there and he is distressed, “Why do you have that?!”
“Her name is Leia, Steve,” Dustin says, “and she has separation anxiety.”
Steve opens his mouth like he wants to complain but doesn’t even know where to begin so he just accepts it, “Is she going to eat somebody?”
“That happened one time!”
Eddie Munson, infamous guitarist that lived on Rock N Roll Dad’s walls as a teenager, uses the opportunity to slide up next to Mr. Harrington and wrap an arm around him. He kisses his cheek, “Baby, we’re here to help.”
“You’re here to guilt me into letting you be a part of Career Day.”
“I can multitask, babe,” Eddie grinned, still so close to Steve that his smile touches his cheek. Steve just sags against him and Rock N Roll Dad thinks, oh. He thinks, oh, shit.
“You have a fan,” Steve mumbles, pulling away a little. It takes Rock N Roll Dad a second to realize that they’re talking about him and then he thinks, fuck.
“Hey – Hi. Uh.” He stops, thinks about lying and saying he needs tape or something, but settles on, “I didn’t know my kid’s teacher married you.”
“Technically, I married him.”
“Technically, I married both of you,” Dustin pointed out. “I officiated the wedding.”
“Ah,” Rock N Roll Dad says because what else is there to say. “Big fan.”
“Yeah, I can tell.”
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olomaya · 9 months
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More Activities Activity Table
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Eat, Play, Learn! Family Fun for Everyone!
2-Sep Update: Thank you @jeebeehey for the French translation. Please redownload if you'd like them.
Updated for redownload (27 July):
Fixed an issue where the interaction cancels out if a toddler doesn't like the food. Thanks to @zemyna for catching!
Added the non-English stbls. Sorry, I swear I'm not one of those Anglophones that thinks English is the only language (I actually speak 3!), it's just a small step in the upload process that's easy to forget.
This is the final part of my little Kids and Toddlers mod series. It's meant to complement the Coloring Book and the Toddler foods mods so you will need those for this.
When I started this, I didn't think through how many new animations or custom details it would entail and I as continued, I kept having to add more and more. There are like 60 animations and 40 image assets 😭 hence why the two main files are so large for a mod.
What I've done is added more activities to the Activity Table after years of being annoyed that the Activity Table we have in TS3, despite being the EXACT SAME table from TS2, does not in fact allow your Sims to draw on it. EA, so lazy!
Anyway, what this does is add 4 new interactions to the Activity Table: Coloring, Arts & Crafts, Puzzles and the ability to serve toddlers food so they can eat there.
The activities are for toddlers and kids only but Teens+ can join in the puzzles if it's already been started by a toddler or child.
Note this will work with any of the Activity Tables in the game or Store but the puzzle will look weird as it's placed in the same spot as where the blocks are. You can use it with custom/cc activity tables provided only the mesh has been edited (for example, if slots are changed or removed, it may not work).
Credits/Thanks: The glue bottle, crayon, CAS paint items and one of the arts and crafts image assets are from @aroundthesims. Thanks as always to Sandy for her generosity and creativity in making Sims content! I originally only wanted to add the option to color/draw but this set of hers inspired me to add in more features. (hmm, maybe I shouldn't be thanking you then considering what a pain that was 🤔😅) All other objects and images are from TS4. Custom animations are by me using TS4 and TS3 as bases.
All buyable objects (table, crayons, puzzles) can be found in Kids Room/Toys.
Check out my other mods in the Kids and Toddlers series: Coloring Book for Kids, Toddler Bed, Toddler Foods and Snacks.
If you run into any issues (and YOU'VE READ THROUGH THE INSTRUCTIONS) please let me know!
Please read below the cut for all the details on features and how to play.
Download here | Alternate Link: SFS
Coloring: Toddlers and Kids can color if there is a crayon box on the lot. Just like using a coloring book, coloring a picture will take up one crayon. Coloring increases painting skill for both. When completed, the final project will be in their inventory.
Arts & Crafts: Toddlers and Kids can do an arts and craft project. Not additional object is needed. They go pretty crazy with the glitter and glue so it can be dirty stuff if they don't have the neat trait. This activity decreases their hygiene and they will get covered in glitter paint when done. Similar to coloring, when completed, the final project will go in their inventory and they get painting skill while playing.
Puzzles: You need to buy a puzzle box and have it on your lot to do puzzles. There are two puzzle boxes but they do the same thing. And they stack! (I love stackable things) There are 3 puzzle types: Easy, medium and Hard. Toddlers can only do Easy puzzles. Children can do either easy, medium or Hard puzzles depending on their Logic skill (for Hard, logic needs to be 3 or higher). The puzzle difficulty will also determine how long it takes to complete the puzzle. Teens+ can help with puzzles but they can't start a puzzle on their own. Toddlers can kids can start a puzzle on their own or help another Sim with a puzzle. Puzzles increase Logic skill for all those playing it but will increase faster for whoever starts the puzzle. If a puzzle is completed, everyone who helped put it together will get bonus skill points. If there is already a puzzle on the table, there is no option to start another, you can only help with the current puzzle. There are different puzzle images (15 in total) but there's no difference between them. The only thing that matters is puzzle difficulty. If the Sim who started the puzzle stops for whatever reason (you or the game cancels the interaction), everyone else helping will stop as well.
Eating: Children+ can serve toddlers meals or snacks. It works the same as my Toddler Foods and Snacks mod. They will place the tray/bowl on the activity table and then call the toddler to eat. If the toddler is hungry, they will go over and start eating. Otherwise, they can always eat it later.
Known Issues:
Animations aren't perfect (but what in life is?) so there's some clipping, especially on the toddlers when they kneel.
The comically large puzzle piece accessory jumps around a little and sits kind of weird in the toddler's hand. I suspect this is because the game is using the adult version of the object animation. I've noted it for fixing whenever I do a second pass on the mod.
The food tray is upside down. Setting object rotation in-game messes up the routing for the table so I'm leaving it as is as it doesn't really bother me.
If there is a food tray or bowl on the table, you shouldn't be able to do anything else there because that slot/part is being used but I had this happen once where my tester child started coloring there. It didn't happen again but if it does happen in your game, simply cancel out the interaction and route them to another part of the table.
The puzzle leaves a shadow even when it's pile form because the shadow mesh is there but you only see it until the geostate changes.
This is not an issue but the alternate material states for objects are only available in high so if you play with graphic settings for objects on medium or low, you're going to see the default image for the puzzles or pictures.
Tagging for reblogs: @kpccfinds @katsujiiccfinds @pis3update
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llamagoddessofficial · 4 months
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Excuse me could we get some farmtale sans headcanon please just a crumb
You don't need to ask twice lol
He's deceptively strong, even by Sans standards. He's on par with Skull for raw strength. This guy carries massive heavy things pretty much for a living; he loads bales bigger than you. He could carry you around on one arm, and he might genuinely tuck you under one arm if he needs to carry you while he's busy
However he is also extremely Somft. He simply wants to sit on the couch and wear chunky knit sweaters and drink soup all day.
His greatest talent is coming up with places to nap that are out of sight of Papyrus. You'll be regularly tripping over him
He's wonderful to nap with! He smells like straw and sweet veg, his strong arms are perfect for cuddles. He is unreasonably comfy.
He flirts by giving you things from the farm. He'll show up to your door without warning, carrying cartons of fresh eggs, boxes full of veg, butters and jams and chutneys... one time, even a whole wheel of cheese.
(Probably saves you hundreds on groceries.)
Papyrus frequently asks you to go check on Sans while he's working, maybe to bring him food or a drink, 'see if he's doing it right', etc. Papyrus knows Sans is absolutely fine and knows how to do those jobs. But he also knows that Sans makes an art out of half-assing certain chores and making them take forever... if you're there, Sans wants to show off, and he ends up working twice as fast.
Sans has a way with animals. His vibes are just so easygoing that even the most high-strung creatures like him. Anytime he falls asleep, he ends up with chickens sitting with/on him until he wakes up.
For a guy who works with plants, he's pretty terrible at remembering the names of them. He knows the important ones, and that's about it. Don't expect him to remember more than he absolutely has to.
He's an excellent seamster! If anything you like rips, let him know. He can make it look good as new.
His love language is acts of service. He does the absolute bare minimum for people he doesn't like, and equally, he does So Much for people he loves (like you). He'll tow you for miles if you break down, he'll pick you up from anywhere at any time without complaint, he'll lend you incredibly important items of his as if it's no big deal. If you leave him alone in your home for too long he'll find something to repair or tweak... clothes, furniture, holes in the walls/creaky windows, etc. You'll come downstairs in the morning to find out he's fixed your heating.
His ideal date is driving out to a quiet field at night, then sitting under a blanket together and watching the stars. He may not know his plants... but he knows his stars, that's for sure.
Too bad he'll be too busy looking at you.
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rookiesbookies · 2 months
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Konig and His Loser
Sex Doll AU, here's the one that won my poll. sorry he took so long- big thank you to @shotmrmiller for helping me edit and get it to perfection ❤️
Masterlist is pinned on profile as always, check out my AU list for more like this. Don’t forget to leave me a comment (i always try to respond) or a request in my inbox (i also try to respond to these when I can), a reblog, or even just a like to let me know what yall want to see!
Konig seemed pretty similar to the other stories but she had found him in a magazine. A simple magazine ad, but she just called it in, why not right?
Well, she hadn’t read the size well and was lucky that they had to call a moving company to get him in from the warehouse. 
She couldn't believe her luck as she watched the movers gingerly maneuver the box that held Konig through the narrow hallway of her apartment building. 
As they finally managed to get Konig into her living room, just from the outside of his box she could tell he was huge.
After fighting open the box once the movers had left, she stood back in awe, taking in every intricately carved detail of his frame. His features were striking yet delicate, a perfect balance of strength and vulnerability that seemed to draw her in deeper with each passing moment.
Once freed she saw that he was a masterpiece in person, not done justice by the pages of that damned ad, a work of art that had seemingly materialized from her dreams onto the glossy pages of the magazine ad. 
Especially his scars. The big ugly ones that littered his face. He looked like whatever mask he had come with had caught on fire at some point. She had a hard time telling if it was by design or not.
She spent hours just sitting in front of him, tracing the lines and curves of his form with her fingertips, feeling his skin and texture. He felt so close to human. It was as if he held a piece of her soul within him, a connection that transcended time and space.
Over the days that followed, she found herself drawn to Konig more and more, losing herself in the depths of his enigmatic presence. She tried hard to figure out how to 'activate' him as he did turn on in the instruction manual. They manual made it clear there seemed to be one, but as she fiddled with his clothes and appercence to try to turn her new toy on.
She truly did her best but she had been watching some movies from her childhood on reruns when the idea of 'true love's kiss' jumped into her mind.
She felt him breathe against her after she planted it softly on his lip. His hands moved to her hips and pulled her closer and over his lap. He held her close, his touch familiar and comforting, but maybe that was just her delusion. She could feel the warmth of his body against hers as they embraced in the dimly lit room. 
The soft patter of rain on the windows created a soothing background melody to their not so silent dance. She nestled into his arms, her heart racing with a mix of excitement and apprehension. Time seemed to stand still as they lingered in that moment of intimacy, savoring the connection that bound them together. 
Despite the mask that concealed his identity, she knew him intimately and cherished the bond they shared beyond words or appearances in some deep, almost spiritual way. And so they remained entwined, two souls intertwined in a delicate balance of love and uncertainty, lost in the beauty of their silent embrace.
He stayed quiet, almost scary quiet and they kissed over his mask. Feeling eachother’s lips through the fabric of an old t-shirt.
His hands moved lower, tracing the curves of her body as he rid her of her pajama pants. She gasped at the touch, her skin tingling with desire. His fingers were gentle yet firm, leaving a trail of heat in their wake, his tough fingers from working on the field roaming her.
She couldn't help but feel self-conscious as his eyes roamed over her exposed body. He didn't seem to mind. In fact, his touch was filled with such tenderness and adoration that it made her heart swell with emotion.
He kissed her again, keeping the thin barrier of his mask, his lips demanding and insistent. She responded eagerly, losing herself in the passion that consumed them both. For a moment, she forgot about everything else - the world outside their room, their past lives and all their struggles. All that mattered was this moment and the overwhelming sense of love they shared. His hulking figure even more imposing with all his gear on.
His hand traveled lower, teasing between her legs until she moaned against his lips. He continued to explore every inch of her body until she was trembling with desire.
He lifted her onto her couch. He scooted up and put her legs over his shoulders and just went to town after draping his mask over her lower lips. It was like he was starved, leaving her gasping. He was messy, her slick coating his face before he lifted himself and leaned her back. He whispered some coaxing things in a language she didn't understand, she assumed they were coaxing at least.
With hesitation, he guided his delicious uncut cock inside of her, it barely escaped his heavy military pants, and she gasped at the sensation. It wasn’t similar to anything she or he had ever experienced before - a perfect pleasure that sent shivers down her spine. He was so big, long, a girthy that she couldn't believe it. She was so on Cloud 9 that she felt like she couldn't breathe. It was like his dick was up in her throat stopping any words from leaving her. His tip hit her cervix and his breathing got heavy with hers as he tore off his helmet with one hand and went back to kissing her, draping his mask over the lower half of her face. Her eyes were rolling around her skull, she was high on the way he rubbing on her insides. The feeling was a certain type of suffocatingly delicious moment as their breaths mixed under his mask.
As they moved together in some perfect harmony, it felt like they were two pieces finally coming together to complete each other's puzzle. She was lost in his embrace, finding solace and comfort in their shared intimacy.
When they finally reached their climax, it felt like fireworks exploding in every corner of the room. He collapsed as gently as he could onto his forearms to keep from falling on her, breathing heavily as they basked in the aftermath of their love.
For a while, they lay there in silence, feeling content and fulfilled in each other's presence. As the rain continued to pour outside, they remained wrapped up in each other- two imperfect beings finding perfection in their love for one another.
All she could think about was, from how he panted like a dog, maybe he was a loser too.
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vincentbriggs · 4 months
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Mr. Fiberglass looks very dashing and extremely gender. May I ask how you made that mask? It looks great and I may want one for myself 👀
Thank you!
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It was 8 or 9 years ago so I don't remember it super well, but it's mostly cardboard and papier mâché. I built the base using cardboard boxes and a lot of masking tape, and you can still see some of the tape and cardboard inside the snout.
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I made the horns by cutting 2 identical spiral shapes out of cardboard, and stretching them like a slinky, which is a much easier way to get them to spiral and be symmetrical than starting out with a straight thing and curving it. I'm pretty sure I bulked them up and got them to stay in that shape by taping lots of wads of crumpled up newspaper to the sides.
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I covered the whole thing in layers of very cheap paper towel and Elmer's art paste, and used that to add a few little ridges and such.
The texture on the horns was made by just wrapping one long continuous strip of paper towel around and around, straight off the roll. (It was the really cheap stuff with no perforations and with obvious flecks of recycled paper in it.)
I have a piece of polyester batting shoved into the top because I didn't quite get it to the same shape as the top my head, and it's a bit uncomfortable.
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It's also very hard to see in! I looked at photos of real sheep skulls for reference, and I put the eyes further forward to account for my human binocular vision, but they're still really far back and hard to see out of, so you have to look out the nose too.
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I seem to remember first painting it with glossy acrylic paint, and then repainting it with matte paints because it just doesn't look as skull-like when shiny. The shading is awful because acrylic paints dry so dang fast, so it might be nice to go back and refine the texture a bit and repaint it again someday, but that's not at all on my priority list right now.
I hope this helps, and that you have fun making one!
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theglitterypages · 5 months
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JJK Men As Your bf Featuring Itadori Yuji
Itadori Yuji as a boyfriend
-Yuuji is definitely the sweetest boyfriend you could have. He's very affectionate and he never fails to reassure you that he loves you so much. This reassurance from your boyfriend helps you overcome your insecurities and lessen the jealousy in you.
-Loves cuddling, he always tell you that it's cold but that's just an excuse. This cutie pie will always insist that he needs to cuddle with you because it's cold even if it's not. He just wants to keep you close, it helps him relax because to him cuddling you means protecting you.
-He would cook for you. If you're living in the same flat, you will only cook occasionally because he will treat you like a princess and won't let you cook for him unless you insist. He says he enjoys cooking because he wanted your stomach to be filled with what he cook with love. He will pack your lunch and trust me, he will buy different lunch boxes for every day of the week. He will arrange it cutely and your classmates will be so jealous of how neatly done your lunch is. It's not just aesthetically pleasing, the taste also exceeds expectations.
-Loves kissing your lips but he'll be kissing your forehead much often. I can already see Yuji as a guy who would only kiss your lips in a very intimate setting. Even if he's into PDA, he still sets boundaries because he doesn't want to embarrass you in public. He prefers kissing your forehead in public, or the tip of your nose, and if there's a man nearby obviously admiring his girl, that's the only time where he would bravely kiss you in public. But even so, he will still whisper to you asking if he can kiss you on your lips in public. He never would do that if you say no.
-Yuji can be forgetful but he makes sure to organize his schedule to not forget important events with you. He has everything marked in his calendar, from your monthsarry, anniversary, your period, your exams, and everything else. He loves to check your schedule that you keep and sync it on his so he would know when he would pick you up.
-The type of guy that you can drag in nail salons and he'll get his pretty nails done as well uwu. Yuji loves seeing you get your nails done, he loves seeing your nais colored and seeing tiny patterns and arts on it. He wouldn't stop admiring your nails, he'll hold your hand and kiss every finger and tell you how much he loves it. Sometimes your tight schedule forbids you from having your nails done. Yuji keeps track on when you would usually get your nails done. (He has it marked in his calendar, like "28th of the month is my princess' nail care day") so when you don't mention anything about nails on that day, Yuji will do your nails for you (sort of) since he's not a pro, he would buy press on nails with different designs and put them on for you.
Yuji woke up early on Sunday morning. He noticed that you were already out of bed so he immediately took his phone under his pillow and exit the room to look for you. He opened his phone and saw a reminder for today. "My Princess' Nail Care Day" says the notification on his phone. Yuji panicked and looked around just to see you in front of your laptop at the living room. You were sipping your coffee and your eyes were fixed on your screen, you couldn't even glance up at Yuji who sat down beside you at the sofa.
"Good morning, beautiful."
Yuji kissed your cheeks as he looked at what you were doing on your laptop. You stopped typing for a moment and gave him a peck on his cheek before typing once again. "Good morning, handsome. Why're you up so early?" you asked, Yuji placed his arms around you and let his eyes roam on the laptop screen. You were creating a power point presentation about a certain genre in literature. "You weren't beside me so what's the point of sleeping. Plus, it's nail care day today isn't it? What time is your appointment?" he asked.
He stood up and made his way to the kitchen as he waits for your response.
"Babe, Nail care day is cancelled. There's too much stuffs we need to do. There was a last minute change in our report and I got to fix it. Plus, I'll be at Nobara's place for another homework. I'm sorry, I forgot to tell you last night." You knew that Yuji loves accompanying you to the Nail Salon but there are times like this where school deadlines are pain in the ass. "Maybe we can squeeze it in on Tuesday, love. I'm sorry." you apologized, you closed your laptop and moved to the dining table where Yuji is making his coffee. You were pouting up at him and he smiled.
"Hey, it's nothing. No need to say sorry, I know how tough it is. Want me to help? I can type your contents on your presentation, you can do other stuffs. Just send me the things needed to be there, and you can check if I did it right or nah." He sat beside you and look over at your laptop as he sips onto his coffee. As a boyfriend, Yuji wants to always lend you a hand whenever he can, to him, it's a huge deal to share problems, works and other worries with his partner, he wanted to let you know that whatever it is, you can count on him.
You smiled and kissed him on his cheeks. "Aww, you're the best babe! I'll send the written report to you, I'll take a shower before I go straight to Nobara's flat. I'll probably back after lunch. Is it okay for you?" you asked as you take one last sip on your coffee. You're so thankful that you have a reliable boyfriend like Yuji. He's the best boyfriend ever.
Yuji nods, "Alright, I'll cook breakfast so you could eat before you go. Want me to cook you lunch too?" he asked as he follows you to the bedroom.
"Babe…" you looked at him with teary eyes, Yuji frowned and held your hand gently. "What's wrong? Is there a problem?" he asked, concerned.
You shook your head and hugged him tight, letting yourself inhale his sweet scent. "No, you're just too..sweet. I don't deserve you." you sniffed as you feel him chuckle. Yuji really gives you the princess treatment and that's not an exaggeration, and you wanted to do the same for him but when he's like this you really feel like you don't deserve this kind of love, because he's just too reliable, he's always there and sometimes you feel bad, thinking that you're not giving the same thing that he's giving in this relationship.
Yuji gently pulled away from you and tucked your hair behind your ear. "You deserve every great things in this world. I love you, hmm? We're partners, alright? Whatever you do, I should do my best to be a part of it." he smiled, cupping your face and kissing you softly.
"You go and take a shower. I'll drop you at Nobara's." he kissed you once more and took his laptop to work on your power point.
You weren't able to go home after lunch. When you checked your phone it was already 6 pm and even if you texted Yuji to tell him you won't be home at the hour your promised, you still felt bad. The two of you weren't able to spend much time together yesterday, because he was the one busy with his classmates, he was at Megumi's place till 7 and when he got home he looks tired so y'all went to bed early and now it's already 6 and there's not much time left to do some fun stuffs for the weekend.
"I'm home, babe." you announced as you open the door of your apartment. The living room was empty but it wasn't long till Yuji appears from the bedroom, he rushed to help you out of your shoes and gave you a tight hug and a kiss on your forehead, it's something that he always does when you just arrived home, "You should've called, I was gonna pick you up." he said as he took your bag from you and set it on the center table.
"Phone's dead on my way home. I just took a cab."
"You look tired, come, I cooked something for you. I also finished your presentation and I went to Fushiguro's house to borrow some books, I got two that is related to your presentation, you can check it and see if something's useful. I already had the page marked."
Yuji took advantage of his free time to think of ways to help you and make you relax when you get home. He wanted you to feel relieved at home and not worry much about stuffs.
Upon hearing his efforts, you charged yourself on your boyfriend, Yuji caught you because of his quick reflexes and you buried your face in his neck, "I love you so much, Yuji." you whispered. Yuji blushed, part of him is thankful you're not seeing what he looks like right now, because he's sure he's as pink as his hair.
"I love you too, princess." he whispered as he gently set you down.
After eating dinner, Yuji helped you clean your make up and you've decided to watch a movie while cuddling at the living room before you go to bed. You set up the movie and the snacks while Yuji was at the room looking for something.
"Babe, movie's ready!" you called excitingly.
Yuji was busy looking for the bag full of pressed on nails that he bought earlier. He figured that he's gonna put them on you so you can still feel like you had your nails done. He went out of the bedroom holding the paper bag behind him as he walks towards you.
"Hey, I paused the movie for y--What's that? What're you hiding?" you asked, trying to peek at what he has behind him but he laughed and avoid your attempts to peek. "Sit down, baby. I'll let you see if you behave." he said in a serious tone, you sat down properly and wait for him to show you what is it.
Yuji showed you the paper bag first, and you frowned. "Ahm okay, what is it?" you asked. Yuji handed it to you with a smile. "Take a look." he smiled.
When you opened the bag, your jaw dropped. The bag was full of pressed on nails and the colors, the designs and the shapes are all pretty. Man, you can't count how many they are. "Holy, babe, these are so pretty! OMG!" you squealed and hugged him tightly. Yuji hugged you back and took the bag from you.
"I bought it so you'd still feel like you got your nails done. And I'll put it on for you. Before your class, tomorrow. So you can choose a design and we'll have it on your nails tomorrow." he whispered, pinching your cheeks as he sat beside you.
You checked each pack inside the bag and every pack that you see makes you realize how much care Yuji has put in choosing the designs, he got the right design and colors that you loved and all you could so is pepper his face with kisses all night because he deserves it for being the good boyfriend that he is.
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