#and also my life for the next 3 months

[the-village-dunce]

waitwaitwait lemme see smth

#i wanna know how much my roboticsposting actually comprehends #for the uninitiated: frc is first robotics competition #high school robot soccer basketball rock climbing frisbee #and also my life for the next 3 months #😀👍

[noxious-fennec]

A redraw of an old thing because exam season is the only time i get creative energy ig

#but no fr i just came home from 2 consecutive exams. like consecutive as in one after the other in 2 hours #next week is all finals and theyre all like 2 hours 1 in the morning and 1 in the afternoon like bro #whatevs tho medical update THE MEDS ARE WORKING alhamdulilallah i feel im getting way more energy :) #2 years on immunosuppressants and at least 3 months of corticosteroids which means no salt :( BUT we are getting thru it #im cooking again :') #ok enough my life is not what you're here for. idk if cbeeduo at the end of 2023 *is* but idc #i just rly missed them yk and the vibes and the place i was in plus i have fun drawing them so suck it #i hope my good cbee mutuals enjoy this love yall #my art #dsmp fanart #cranboo #ctubbo #cbeeduo #fashion notes for the cool peeps still reading is i am dying on the hill that cranboo was decked in a 70s aunt wardrobe argue with the wall #also tubbo cowboy cus. like. look at him. #will probably draw tommy next i rly miss him. nothing big as always im a doodle kinda guy at heart #anyway xoxo love yall still here <33 #fennec.art

[lazyveran]

political marriage au. their first night together after the wedding

#this au is taking over my life #pls be prepared to see my shitass writing abt it on ao3 in the next. uhm 3 months #azutara political marriage au #azutara #azula #katara #atla #veran scribbles #also ask me questions abt this au. PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE

[ryonello]

valorant catgirls on the brain again .... fade this time :3

#fade #valorant #hazal eyletmez #sorry for no art for a while ! i have been um . going thru it #this month has been the worst for a long time i am having a lot of SHit Happen ALL AT ONCE but i keep trucking #🥺👍 #my car kaboomed . and i need to buy a new one . and everything costs so much #+other financial shit happening BUT ITS FINE BC I HAVE A BUNCH OF CONS NEXT MONTH #i am goign to be exhausted but i am going to be okay . staying strong staying positive crying a lot but thats fine it is like that sometimes #hope life is treating yall better than me rn <3 #sorry for spontaneous vent in tags on unrelated art oops #anyway ! :D #i will be at adelaide ozcc next weekend / melbozcc the following weekend / sydnova the weekend after that ! #ALSO super lookign forward to smash and avcon in july !!!! will have new merch for them if they arrive in time :] #but yes . back to binging totk to cope :] maybe new link art when i have free time again i love him so fuckign much its insane #mwah #my art

[adanaac]

love to do wiki work. hate doing it. love hating it. hate loving it.

(my fun little js project that im way too proud of. i love to click buttons)

#i have to keep stopping myself from going on 2 hour research tangents on what exactly byakkos fit is #and when exactly china invented the four gods (somewhere between 2000BC and 1 kajillion BC) #“why do u do this stuff if ur always bitching about it” well u see i love loving it. #also “well someone else will probably do it” was also the attitude i had in 2018 about both translation and the wiki #and then fuck all happened in the next 3 years which is why im here now #and also bitching about it is my love language <3 would never bitch about something i dont love #anyway my life has just been working on the wiki for the past month i think im a husk of a human being

[da-proti-toku-grem]

my mom found this super detailed online test that helps you find careers that you'd probably like according to your answers (ofc we know that it's just a test and it doesn't mean you have to study what they give you, but i just can't find anything that i like and i'm running out of time, so we were like, why not yk) so, i took the test and after 30 minutes of answering questions you know what i got? biotechnology. the same career that i chose last year and the one i dropped out of in january.

idk if i want to laugh or cry tbh

#i mean it gives you more than one option but this was the one with more compatibility #and the other ones are also a big no for me so... #god idk what to do with my life #and atp i can't help but start thinking (again): did i drop out bc i didn't like the career or bc my mental health is SO bad #i think it's a combination of the the two bc yeah i probably would've enjoyed the few months i did at least a bit more if i wasn't depresse #but i REALLY didn't like it #tho then again i don't know what changed bc it WAS what i wanted and then i got there and i went NOPE almost immediately #and like i know your opinions can change and that is good that i dropped out if i realized that's not my thing #but i can't help but wonder if it is really not my thing or is my brain just not letting me enjoy the things i like? #bc every option i've been looking at to start next year is like... No #i can't find anything i think i might enjoy at least a little bit #i found this university that i gives you the possibility of doing the classes and exams online and everything #and that would be to study 'translation and interpretation' with english & french (& spanish ofc) #and since i'm already bilingual in english & i've a certificate in french (not bilingual but is smth) i would be able to skip some subjects #which is good i guess and i like languages but it's also like the opposite of what i've been doing my whole life bc i studied science in hs #and then again idk if i'll like it or not #and i know i won't know if i like it or not until i try it out and everyone is like 'well if it's not your thing then you drop out again' #which i mean is true i Can but god i don't want to go through all this again i need at least a bit of certainity or i'm gonna go insane #also i've been searching for so long w/o findinf anything that my parents are already saying #'well if you don't want to study you'll have to look for a job' #and if the thought of studying a carreer is already scary #if i have to look for a job rn (there are not many options here if you don't have a degree)...... #the thought itself makes me sick :/ #i just don't know what to do and i'm so fucking tired i just want to curl up in bed and not do anything for at least 2 months #(am i having another existential crisis after that panic attack 3 days ago or did the existential crisis not stop since january?) #(probably sooner) #(i guess we'll never know........) #venting #maca speaks

[missholoska]

Is it just me or does almost every outfit in the sims 4 cottage living just seems like something Toriel would wear?

yeah that's just objectively correct tbh

pretty goat mum 💜✨

#holoskart asks #I gotta draw at least one of these outfits next soriel week for sure :'> #also speaking of cottage living. I swear that pack had something against my toriel sim for the longest time #bc the pack introduced a bunch of new pie recipes and a pie competition every few weeks. so Obviously toriel needed to win that #except the game absolutely refused to let her win for real life months on end #I have a screenshot where all 3 pies entered one time were the same type. toriel's was excellent quality vs 2 townies' normal quality pies #she still lost to them. and then when she finally Did win first place several tries later it happened in the dumbest way possible #she entered a pie. waited for hours until the competition ended. no result appeared so I gave up and sent her home #two in-game weeks pass. frisk is hanging out at their high school's football event. a notification pops up as the event ends #the result from the pie competition finally appears. during the wrong event and two entire weeks late. and then my game crashed #luckily everything turned out the same way and she still got the first place result but god. it was So Much #anyway this kind of nonsense is why I love the sims gjhdsfjgh

[running-in-the-dark]

it's been a month since we moved into the new apartment -

I'm so stressed. everything is stressful. we're still not done building the kitchen but it's getting there (slowly). mostly we just need to wait until we get a couple parts that weren't in stock when we ordered the rest. I'm hoping it'll be done by next weekend.

some of it is very frustrating with my brain specifically. I'm so bothered by all the tiny little things that no one else would even notice - like, some of the handles on the drawers are very slightly crooked (as in, less than a millimeter higher on one side) - but for me it's so obvious that it's impossible to ignore. my husband didn't even know what I meant when I pointed it out to him. there's also been a few slightly bigger issues, but we've solved them now (I think).

my eye has been twitching for like three to four weeks. not all the time obviously, but every few minutes. it's very, very annoying.

we still have no new info about when we'll have internet finally. it could take a while still.

on Monday a guy has to replace something in the electric roller shutters in one room - but we don't know which one yet. so either I'll have to let him into my room (awful, uncomfortable, will have to tidy up tomorrow so he could even get to the window), or I'll have to get both our cats into their carrier if it's the one in my husband's room (awful, difficult, one of them doesn't like that so he'll be scared and I'll feel bad).

also on Monday the electrician will install our stove (if he has time). then we're getting two ikea deliveries. and I've got an appointment with my (new) GP because I need a prescription, and I'm very (verrry) nervous about it.

I miss watching TV. I miss tumblr and YouTube and messaging my friends whenever I want and sending them photos all the time. I miss order and structure and (some level of) routine. I miss using real cutlery (we still haven't found ours lol).

when I was finally starting to get used to the noises in this place, the family above us moved in with their baby that cries all the time very very loudly and most of the time right above my room. so now everything is different again and I'm not adjusting well and once again I can't sleep.

but, I've listened to 14 audiobooks since we moved! that's been nice. it was the same way when we moved the last time (just over a year ago..). my favourite by far was The Thursday Murder Club. I've got the other ones in the series but I'm trying not to listen to them too quickly, so I'm gonna listen to three other books first (one is done already, so I should get there on Monday or Tuesday hopefully).

#long rambly post sorry #I miss talking about the random uninteresting shit that happens in my life on here all the time #I've got data on my phone again now at least so that's good. but the phone signal is still awful indoors so it's not that useful #but anyway.... logically I know I'm doing an okay job with unpacking and everything but it doesn't feel like it #also I'm probably gonna have to try to find at least a part time job pretty soon and I'm really really really scared. terrified. #not just of trying to find something and interviews and all that #but that I won't be able to handle it. physically and mentally. again. #I've only had one full time job (an apprenticeship actually) and I lasted 3 months. #and at my part time job I only lasted a month #like. I can barely get anything done in a day as it is. I have so little energy. everything is so fucking hard and exhausting #I truly don't understand how everyone does it. I don't understand how it's possible. #but if I don't find something we won't have money for food next month sooooo it is sort of kind of important #it sucks so fucking much. I can't stand or walk for long periods of time. can't do too much with my hands. I'm not good at dealing with #people/customers. I panic and can't think when I get nervous (which is most of the time). I can't remember shit. #so like. what job am I supposed to do??? everything hurts all the time already and I'm always tired and I'm barely keeping it together #fuuuuck this #😭 #personal

[girlscience]

You ever realize that you maybe know two whole people who haven't been in a romantic relationship of some kind before and it makes you want to melt into the floor and die?

#i turn 26 next month. i have been on a grand total of 3 dates in my life #i don't want a quote unquote traditional romantic relationship #(i know this. y'all know this. i have talked about it extensively before) #i don't even know if what i am looking for is a romantic relationship entirely #i just feel gross and vaguely lonely and thinking about this make me feel even lonelier and also kind of broken #and i have friends who love me and i can talk to any time and hug and do stuff with #i saw friends literally yesterday #actually i think maybe i just want a hug. like a really really really long hug #someone needs to lay down on my couch and let me lay on top of them and stick my face in their stomach and squeeze them till i feel better #that's what i want #you can watch tv or listen to music or read or whatever you want while i do this you just can't move or touch me. just let me squeeze you

[inertia-writes]

dehradun days

you meet them for the first time,

knowing it's probably the last.

might as well make the most of this time,

since life comes at you fast.

you find the strangest of signals

in the no-network zones.

cross-tent communication with folks,

just rambling about the unknown.

there's the warmth of shared laughter,

that carries you through freezing nights,

and you look up at the flickering stars,

to finally see things in a different light.

and at 11,000 ft above sea level

you finally reach the peak,

just to realise the joy was in the journey,

and the friends you made that week.

you'll visit caves & splendid cafes,

and remember the city in mere parts,

but years later, you'll still tell everyone,

how dehradun captured your heart.

#inertia-writes #poets on tumblr #desi poetry #dehradun poetry #poems on india #poems on life #desiblr #being desi #dehradun #i went on a trek w the lowest of expectations and it was one of the best experiences of my life #it's so refreshing to meet people from different cities and of different ages and backgrounds #jan and feb were pretty meh but things have been looking upwards from march (thank you god - i acknowledge your existence) #thought of writing a happy poem for a change of tone (and also maybe because i am genuinely happy :) ) #this isn't one of my best poems i feel - it's a bit unrefined - but who cares it is one of my happy ones sooooo #there are times when absolutely nothing significant happens and there are days when years happen #i didn't go in the mountains for solitude - i felt that here already haha. i went for a change. #but i gained so many memories w people and so many positive perspectives that i needed in general. also nayata premier league <3 #i think i believe in destiny now. i was destined to meet those people and have a good time and come back to reality w a spring in my step #and maybe the mountains were calling. can't stay away from snow too long - i was born during snowy days anyway #came back home and am still in some weird positive trance - good for me #also my lucky streak is still going on - kaavish released a new song #historic moment in time (thank you god 2x) #poems on friendship #found family #poems on found family #all the may '23 - feb '24 melancholy has been washed out of my system. i am now set for the next tragedy of my life lol #dekhte hai kab tak khush rehti hu mein - kuch bhayankar honewala hai aisa lag raha hai #i do not remember the last time i was happy for a month straight - am i living in a virtual simulation? #whoever is controlling my life rn - i would like to continue to stay in this simulation - thanks v much

[mittenlady]

chapter 15 of CAYA is finally finished. unfortunately i will not be posting anything until i finish chapter 17 <3

#mitten lady writing things #yeah all it took was an 8 AM in a hall with a nice study lounge and having no classes afterward #technically i have hw i need to be doing but i just sat here for like 3 hours and now intend to get subway #if we do bad at regionals then i’ll have a lot more time to write too #but i also will have less of a social life and so. i will need to find another hobby . until next semester #mawk twial is literally half my social life #anyway i just want to finish CAYA. #i at least want to get to the point where the chapters are just the ones detailing in game events #because those are substantially easier to write lol #it’s been really hard getting back into writing after months of being away from it #and tbh i’m struggling to maintain my motivation as intensely as i did this summer again #BUT i’m really excited to write the obligatory post 4-4 scene ;) #and then chapters 22 and 25 i’m very excited for

[katyobsesses]

I think my glee obsession is returning in full force

#this is a nice feeling #i didnt have gleecast anywhere on my Spotify wrapped last year for the first time in... years!!! #but here i am listening to all the songs on repeat most of today #and reading glee fic #and looking at my currently abandoned fics #and having Thoughts™️ and headcanons and just... #special interest obsession shit #its calming and happy and sksgxkdk #also my reading brain is back which is SUCH a relief! #its been like 3 months of only being able to read a book in audiobook form #like my sister write this whol prophecy for our dnd campaign and i could not for the life of me understand it not matter how hard i tried #but last session i finally clicked #and im READING A PHYSICAL BOOK TOOOOOOOO #i just feel more settled because of it its nice #i think i really didnt like the weird weather the uk was having- it being HOT AS BALLS and then freezing like the next week #and then christmas and stress over bemefits happened #but now yhats mostly set... i think.. ish... its still confusing and scary #but ay least i have words i can read to escape it #katy liveblogs life #i am using tumblr like a diary rn ignore me 😂

[finn-shitposts]

I finally bit the bullet and quit my joooob !!! Now im gonna actually have time to rest and catch up on owed art and just fucjin sleep for 3 weeks

(And then scramble to find a job but thars for future me to worry abour)

#dw i still live w my parents and ill save my last paycheck for rent and testosterone ill be fine #but fuck im so relieved #like this job has been getting steadily worse over the past year. #it was meant to be a green/conservation based job but it ended up being 90% landscaping and garden clearances #and there was 0 communication and management and organization is fucking terrible like #its a wonder this company is still going #plus my terf coworker grinds my gears so bad i may have commited murder if i stayed any longer #the only good part of this job was my rly sweet supervisor who is also leavong at the end of the month skdjsj #hes so silly and kind and knowledgable and a bright spot in my life leo my best friend leo <3 he knows soo much about plants!! #anyway he reccomended some horticulture apprenticeships and my other supervisor mentioned an apprenticeship school type thing too #so thats what ill go for next year #so that i can actually work with plants someday. instead of hauling 2 tons of litter out of someones shed cos the owner cba #and the housing association/council refuses to do it cos its shit work #so they pass it off to us #anyway #finn.txt #im gomma be freeeee soon

[victoriartdrawings]

fanfic rec post tomorrow maybe???👀

me to all my fandom ships knowing perfectly i wont have the time to do even 1 for at least one pairing til next week 🤡

#percabeth #snowbaird #anidala #zutara #hiccstrid #so much more ships name to add (like REALLY) these tagged ships are just some my brain is currently obsessed with this week #my next obsession next month???? idk yet 💀 my head is weird. like often #rn im mostly frustated with myself and feel a little bit useless be.cause. it takes so much time!!! but i want to do it #but i dont #so my brain says to me DWE IT YOU LAZY USELESS PROCASTINATING ASS!!!! #like first i have to remember the fic #then scroll through my 7000 downloaded fic folder. a nightmare 💀most of the time i dont remember the title but only the period #where i was obsessed with them (also hell because my multiple obsession with a ship always leave and then come back 2 or 6 months later 🤡 #so sometimes I find myself downloading 2 or 3 times the same fic🤡) #(ALSO some its been 4/5 years since i read them so i let u imagine the headache i get trying to remember lol) #then class them by long fic one shot - theme etc...while re-reading fast some of them bc my memory is shit #and AFTER ALL THAT i write the actual commentary for each one of them and remembering what my experience reading it was like #because personal commentary that made people laugh and want to read the fic recommended make me so happy for the author!!!! #ALSO I MOSTLY JUST LOVE SHARING MY READING EXPERIENCE WITH OTHERS!!!!! SO MUCH JOY AND HAPPINESS! #but then real life is like no.not today. and indeed. not today. #fanfic rec #fanfic #reader #fandom

[forestofsprites]

i hate the need for privacy, man. i hate the danger of the internet. do you have any idea the amount of ridiculously cool facts i desperately want to share, but can't for the danger of doxxing? HELL! hell!!

#man #a month ago something happened that i cannot share. i [redacted] a thing that was sooo in the news & on here but i can't say shit #(it'll happen again next week!!!) #i can't share any more of my franklin research and the parks canada meetings #i can't share any more of my spn family lore #just know #my life is stupid #and it has stupid coincidences and happenings #griffin and tish get to know. they have privilege #but it takes everything to keep my mouth shut man #i've overshared w/ what i do go on about #but trust me. oh there could always be more #you just have to believe me<3 #i'm also up for a really fucking cool award thingy. but if i win it i can't share bc it's a nation-wide thing and i'd be instant doxxed LMF

[bunnihearted]

📖🖊❄️

#journal dump bc i have too much on my mind #1) i HATE my neighbors. theres never one quiet moment. they stomp around and slam cabinets all the time it feels like #2) ​i've been reading more recently even if concentration's hard bc of noise. but i also feel like there r too many books i wanna read #but yeah. too little time. so instead i cant settle on a book and kinda dont even read as much as i want to. a stupid problem really #3) it's crazy to say but i wish i had a part time job. sitting at home 24/7 for 5/6 years has been SO terrible for me. #everything feels meaningless. every day is the exact same. im not LIVING. im rotting away and all my issues get worse. im also so fkn bored #and i dont wanna sit at home and do assignments (even if thats what i technically should be doing) #i want a job to go to which takes me away from home + gives me money #then i can come home and sit and rot and ENJOY it. bc now my lazy time is only smth negative and bad for me :/ #ofc i hate the mere thought of having some soul sucking utterly pointless job and our capitalist society is a slave hellhole. but.. as it is #im not even able to enjoy ANY of my time bc all my time feels bad. plus im only getting poorer and poorer so i cant afford to buy anything #4) im so fkn bored and going crazy from eating the exact same food every single day for the third month now. im sick of it #everything tastes so bland and disgusting. it's genuinely making me depressed 😭 i wanna eat REAL food. im so tired bc no nutrition :(( #i cant do anything except wait for my appt w the doctor next week and hope they put me on a waiting list for surgery.. but ong im sick of it #5) i miss my sisters :/ we live in the same apartment but its like i've completely ceased to exist to them #except when they need to be passive aggressive to me. lol. i miss them. but they just dont wanna talk to me :/ #but tbh. most of all... i just want my health issue to be over so my body can function normally again. #i can face anything in life if i can come home to a cup of coffee nd some chocolate ^-^ <333