#and i am DONE AND OUT

[stil-lindigo]

hobie motherfuckin' brown!!!!!!

#i am so normal about hobie brown (lie) #what the hell has this movie done to me #i have taken art drugs #cant. stop. drawing him. oh my god #its hard to tell but the webbing behind him spells out his name #my anticapitalist king. im sorry but i /will/ be purchasing a poster of you #hobie brown #spiderverse #across the spiderverse #spiderman #spiderman across the spiderverse #stillindigo art

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[panstarry]

my final from last semester that i made into a zine. cooked this one up in a couple hours before the critique (the ink was still wet!), so it's very raw and kind of sloppy but the sentiment is there. i love you trans people of color. we are the backbone of this community 🌟

#pan draws #pan designs #zine #risograph #i'm not gonna lie i don't love how this one turned out OTL and i think the wording is not done but well... a deadline is a deadline #i'll probably touch it up and rewrite it in the future but who's to say.. i need to stew on how to articulate my feelings coherently #anyway my transness is so closely tied to my experience as a person of color. the current political climate is so fucking ass to exist in #but more than anything i am pissed off at white punks & leftists & trans people that refuse to have meaningful solidarity with us. #so yeah anyway. i was stuck on this one forever and only really got anywhere with it after attending 2 punk noise shows in a row where they #actually used their fucking platform to do like. anything. our struggles are connected you need to careeeee YOU HAVE TO CARE........ ok bye #tdov #trans day of visibility #<- i was sitting on uploading this for a while so the stars kind of aligned for it to be today huh.... happy tdov i love you

[birbs-in-space]

curious about what's in store for you for 2024? :D

Let AO3 decide!

(Updated from 2023: Up-to-date tag bank, opt-in tag categories, optional dark mode! As always: proceed with informed consent.)

#new post #clearing out my original tags since they're not 100% accurate but as always this has been a labor of love and also (new!) collaboration #do you know how hard it is to go thru 13k tags and categorize them? so thank you to my dear friend for proofing these #this update has been in the works since june or july (though i worked on it very intermittently) #and i am SO happy to be done with it for the time being #because i very much have other responsibilities LMAO

[munamania]

#already seeing annoying things about my best friend pj bottoms. hear me out. dontttttttt care. where’s fun people #bottoms movie #bottoms 2023 #yellowjackets #jennifer’s body #derry girls #sorry i’m like looking to piss people off be sude #*because i am soooooo tired of listening to people talk about any media #that does not center men. and especially in the ones that do #shut up <3 like please for the love of god #sorry if someone’s done this already

[zan0tix]

HOORAY HOMESTUCK! Happy birthday to the webcomic that changed my life 😁🫶

#413 #homestuck #june egbert #jade harley #dave strider #rose lalonde #roxy lalonde #jane crocker #dirk strider #jake english #my art #zan0tix #dont tag as any ships 🙏 #I WAS SO BUSY TODAY I COULDNT GET IT OUT ON TIME BUT SHH. I am fashionably late. Spongebob music for 7 hours straight let me get it done #Thank you spongebob 🙏🙏

[stoopidstapler]

27.04.2023 HAPPY 10 YEAR ANNIVERSARY TO MY FAVOURITE SFM VIDEO OF ALL TIME, GENTLEBOT HELL BY MISTERMULLUC ON YOUTUBE

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #fanart #''is not the 27 anymore'' PLEASE DONT REMIND ME. I HAD A BIG PART OF THIS DONE BY THE DATE BUT. I DIED MAN. I DIED. #anyways if u havent seen the video I AM BEGGIN U TO CHECK IT OUT ITS SO GOOD. ITS BEEN 10 YEARS. AND THE QUALITY IS STILL ONE OF THE BEST #THE WAY THEY DID THE SCENES. THE ANIMATION GOD. AND HOW WELL THE VOICES FIT SPY AND SCOUT #and the video was made in like. less than a year sfm came out i just aaaaaaa #inspired me so much for a lot of stuff man #ITS SO GOOD

[thefloatingstone]

Playing BG3

Me: Why does Astarion always disapprove when I do something to try and help out victims of slavery or when I do things specifically to uplift people who are victimised by groups and people more powerful than them? You'd think of ANYONE he'd be the guy most in favour of that sort of thing.

The little fairy that lives in my head and talks to me sometimes: It's because you are challenging his warped worldview that only the strong have power and without power you can only be a victim and you are stressing him out by showing him his perspective forged out of decades of abuse of every kind is incorrect and it's making him question if, maybe, how he was treated was unfair and avoidable.

#BG3 #baldur's gate 3 #Astarion #I am still in the very first area of the game and have not done any of the main quest just yet #but I am busy figuring out the characters and their personalities #lol how am I doing? #(also no spoilers please)

[crybaby-bkg]

I think Deku has a bit of a mean streak, actually. he’s no Bakugou—that’s for sure—but he’s not this innocent, sweet angel baby that the media has painted him out to be. but you only catch it when you least expect it, when you’re pushing his nerves, when the stakes to everything around him are high, when he’s tired of endless sleepless nights and just—snaps.

“Oh?” you go, grin unfurling like some grinch, chin resting on your hands as you leer at him from across his expansive desk. “You’re mean.” your words are teasing, a snarl that curls your mouth up. Deku stutters, eyes going wide, jaw snapping shut in surprise as he tries to think back on how rude he just sounded.

“No, I’m not—I mean, you wouldn’t stop and I just—there’s a lot on my plate right now—and you just—you keep on—I’m not—I’m not mean.” He’s sputtering, hands all over the place, the glasses perched on the bridge of his nose falling even lower with how he jabbers on and on. it’s endearing really, to see how he tries to upkeep his image of being so kind and understanding, even though his nostrils just flared at you. and his eyebrows turned down and he gritted at you, his hands were balled into fists, his words were so nasty, so ugly, so unbecoming for Deku.

you liked it. loved it even—vowed to get him like this every single fucking second that you could.

you pick and poke at him whenever you see him, teasing him and pulling at him. pushing him around even though the hero is so much stronger than you, so much bigger. and he lets you, tries to defend himself but—that’s not what you want. you want the ugliness, the snark, the mean.

he snaps, eventually, when you least expect it. grabs you up in black whip when you go to push him against the wall for the third time in only a minute, his eyes suddenly dark, the aura of the room suddenly charged.

“That’s what I was looking for.” you whisper to him, the grin spreading your face quickly dissipating in only seconds when you become the prey. when you become the one pushed up against the wall with teeth at your neck, a hand in your underwear, bullying your hole with too thick fingers.

“Why do you want me to act like this? Be so mean to you, huh?” he sounds so frustrated with himself, with you, growling and nipping and licking when you don’t answer quick enough. but your breath is caught in your lungs because finally—finally, did you get what you wanted. it just took a little bit of pushing, you suppose.

#omg I wrote this idea down last night and couldn’t even type it up #bc I took some sleep meds and it put me out SO FUCKING QUICK???? #usually I don’t lay down until like an hour and a half or two #but it was literally like 40 mins and I was DONE!!!! #but I finally wrote it :D #there’s also been so much talk of him on the dash and i am. very much so liking this #I miss him bc I don’t think about him enough #but I also think he can be. so mean. like NASTY mean when his limits are pushed enough #ohhhh my god I wont him so bad #okay gn I took more meds bc my pelvis has been in so much pain???? #just the right side too??? omg AM I DYING GELP #—new treat in the streets! 🍫 #deku treats! 🍬

[upon-the-snow]

early mornings after nightmares

#just realized I made a pinned post with this art before putting it up whyyy am I like this #anyway headcanon time: I like to think they hang out while the sun comes up after the doctor has a nightmare and they just sit and talk #or Donna will read and just keep him company (I love watching the sun rise it’s such a unique feeling! i suck at getting up early tho lol) #Doctor who #fourteenth doctor #donna noble #I need like. A platonic ship name do we have one of those for them? #my art #not super happy with it but ITS DONE #doctor who fanart #the doctor #catherine tate #david tennant #procreate #Digital art #uh #incase my handwriting is as illegible as I think : Donna’s says “worlds best mum” and the Doctor’s says “worlds okayest uncle” #okay this looks more like a sunset so??

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Laios's three Boy Best Friends. And yes, they hate him.

#dungeon meshi #laios touden #toshiro nakamoto #chilchuck tims #kabru #BF in this context could be boyfriend or best friend. The line is so blurry. #Chilchuck less so but whatever is going on between Shuro and Laios & Kabru and Laios is giving strong: #“dude if you were a girl I'd date the hell out of you”. And from the genderswap extra's that sentiment is canon for BOTH. #This was made prior to the translation of the Laios & Kabru & Shuro restaurant date comic and honestly I am just feeling vindicated. #I don't even know what to call this dynamic other than a situationship. There is so much going on between all of them. #Even on a purely platonic reading - the miscommunication and male yearning for friendship hurt so bad. #When we got the Big Hug scene in the epilogue arc I was whooping and hollering! Pure catharsis moment! #I also don't like hugs very much so I really felt it went Shuro ('hates being touched') went in for the bear hug. #Do not get me started on the agony of 'always lying' Kabru telling the truth (I just wanted to be friends) #and 'always believes' Laios thinking it's another lie and brushing him off. #I am once again supporting dungeon meshi day by posting art. Please watch dungeon meshi. #obligatory edit because I’m tired: YES. Chilchuck cares for Laios and him admitting it was a huge part of his arc #YES he is more just fed up with him that actually hating him. #I needed a third guy to be canonically done with his ass for the THREE WEED SMOKING GIRLFRIENDS reference

[skrs-cats]

set after leafpool dies, before the bonus scene w jayfeather dealing w that grief gets resolved. guess who was bitter over a certain cardboard character bitch not being included in that

Next

#welcome to my blog where i *gets hit on the head by an anvil and i fall to hell* #do NOT underestimate lionblaze fans. there are five of them and theyre all fucking stupid #warrior cats #lionblaze #leafpool #squirrelflight #hollyleaf #jayfeather #to the anons in my inbox this is why i havent responded am sorry... will get to u guys when im done w this monster #art #im also having a lot of trouble figuring out the alt text for this. if anyone wants to help itd be greatly appreciated T_T #added ID in alt text! ty curlfeatherstar!!!!! (made a few minor adjustments since that is still in fact leaf in the third image- #squilfs walking towards her!)

[geminitayyt]

Hey, I heard from someone that you don't like being depicted as a deer. Is that true, or do they just have misinformation?

Sorry for asking if it makes you uncomfortable. I just wanna know cause I have, like, no context😅

I think people get that from misunderstanding a tweet I put out a while ago. I dont hate being portrayed as a deer. Although, it wasnt something i expected. Pre-hermitcraft gem was almost never drawn as a deer, the antlers were meant to be part of a decorative flower crown, not actually growing out of my skull. So it isn't a depiction that I intended or imagined for myself. When I picture my character she's more of a silly nature elf woman. Because of that, I do sometimes wish I could separate from the deer a bit. I tweeted a while ago that I didn't want to *always* be a deer. So for the skins I have that don't have antlers, I usually prefer those to be humans or some other more fitting animal. Wizard Gem from Empires is a good example, I really didnt picture her as being a deer, it didnt fit with the character for me. But season 8 hermit gem can totally be a deer. That doesnt mean if you portrayed wizard Gem as a deer I was uncomfy, it just didnt align with how I imagined the character, which is fine. For season 10 of hermitcraft I plan to ask the audience not to make me a deer. I've had season 8 & 9 gem both be deer now, and I just prefer for my character to be able to change outfits and forms. I think always being portrayed as a deer is putting me in a cottagecore sized box that I never really asked to be trapped in. Season 10 gem won't make sense as a deer anyway, just cause of the theme i'm going with, but to help the fan artists I am commissioning an artist to portray my character close to how I imagine her, with a few animals I think could work in place of the deer.

also if you just haveeee to draw S10 gem as a deer, I still wont be mad, its not that serious I appreciate all the art.

#geminitay #ultimately you can draw me as a deer as much as your heart desires #but when i get art of myself done it usually wont be deer related #the deer art is adorable tho dont be discouraged #my battle with figuring out who i am and what my characters are is my own problem #will gem beat the cottagecore allegations #stay tuned

[expelliarmus]

#mine #doctor who #dwedit #david tennant #catherine tate #freema agyeman #someone has probably done this already but here i am with my version!!!! #one more week of work left before winter break!!! #i can't waitttt #then i can read all my dw books in peace and cry over these two all over again :') #also i really like how the colouring came out for the 3rd gif

[archivebottles]

Happy birthday to the most special girl in the universe!! Wanted to try something ambitious and ended up with the biggest comic I've done to date

#signalis #ariane yeong #elster #overestimating elsters ability to paint so ignore how it looks probably way better than she could have done ok? #myart #i have nothing cool to say here i am so tired. i baked a cake from scratch lol and that took so much out of me... #im old.. #im like cycling(hah) thru three diff elster designs bear with me here #elster seems like the type of person to be really good at gifts..kinda feel like u gotta be when ur on the same ship for um like. 15 years

[mettaworldpiece]

I lost my post on this but yall again you should be reaching out, making community with and uplifting Black trans women esp w the surging fascism and murder rates we face. And make sure you are telling the younger tme babies and yt trans women the same thing cus it is getting ugly out here and it wont get any prettier til yall remember us

#I am running out of ways to say this #but also I shouldnt have to say this these things were known when I was transitioning and before #yes we are not on here like we used to be but there are tons of younger Black trans women on here who need you #and apparently yall need them #peace and love im done on this (for now)