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dogboyjackkennedy · 2 months

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okay, screw it:

time for my interpretation of the DSAF 3 Dee Cutscene (y'all know the one)

basically, i think that it jumps around in time a lot more than we think it does.

now, sure, i'm well aware of the fact that it's most likely meant to be interpreted as "Jack dropped Dee off at the diner while he went to get drunk, and while he was off doing that, Dee got murdered," but...i got something a bit different out of it.

now, i'll lay things out a bit at first, with me explaining how i interpreted the scenes in question:

so, in order:

first scene - Jack drops Dee off at the diner. so far, everything is going along with canon (or, at least, probably how canon is meant to be interpreted). Henry and Dave watch on from the shadows; Dave appears rather normal, while Henry...appears to have an idea. then, of course, Jack leaves the diner.

this, however, is where my interpretation kinda...diverges a bit.

i believe that, between these two scenes below (v)

there's a bigger timeskip.

now, we know that Jack and Peter had to work some jobs in order to support Dee and give her a good life. what if Jack left her at the diner because he had to work that day?

of course, while Jack is gone, Henry abducts Dee and later gets Dave to help with her murder (something of which he did not sound enthusiastic about, might i add). Jack returns a few hours later to pick her up, only to discover she's missing.

this is where this next scene starts:

scene two - Jack returns home from the diner, likely after learning about Dee being missing. he looks upset, and understandably so. now, some may ask: Why Doesn't He Look More Distressed About This? His Sister's Gone! and...okay, hear me out. this may be me projecting a little bit:

...AUTISM.

as someone who is like 99% sure they're autistic (yeah, not formally diagnosed, and not interested in being, either), this is something that, in my research and in my personal experience, can be a sign of autism. it's described as "difficulty showing or expressing emotions appropriately," at least when i tried to look up a way to word it, and. Yeah That's A Thing I Deal With.

(like i swear, every time i find something that Jack does that either i relate to or go "hey, i kinda do that! (to a degree)" and i decide to look it up, it is, basically, An Autism Thing (or, at least, can be Viewed as such).)

so yeah, he's grieving. and a day or two passes.

at some point between this and the next scene, either happening the day before he goes to work there, or even earlier the same day, Jack applies for a position as a nightguard at Fredbear's, likely to figure out what happened to Dee (consider: CAMERAS). he is either told to come back the next night or later that night.

and now, we get to this next part:

scene three - Jack Gets Really Fucking Drunk, Likely Out Of Grief. he drinks a lot, to the point we see clear signs that he's drunk as hell. Look At The Number Of Bottles On The Table (this is important for later; Remember This). eventually, he realizes that it's about time for him to head to work, and that leads to the next scene:

scene four - Jack rushes over to the diner, still drunk, mind you, to go and do his job. and what happens as soon as he walks in?

i know it's hard to see, but...dead ahead is the stage. and one figure seems noticeably shorter than the other.

as though it's not on the stage, but directly in front of it.

and it appears to be Springbonnie, considering we know Springbonnie was on the right, and if you look close enough, there seem to be long ears.

we hear a slowed/deeper version of Henry's theme, as well as a deeper version of Henry's laugh, play in the background, before everything goes dark.

and the cutscene finally ends.

SO, ALL TOGETHER NOW:

Jack drops Dee off at her birthday party at the diner. he has to work, so he can't stay. he likely believes that everything will be fine; it's a place for kids, after all!

A Murder Happens

Jack returns later that evening, only to find out that Dee is missing. he is distraught by this, and probably searches the building top to bottom. the police are likely called at some point.

Jack heads home after it's clear that there's nothing more they can do. He Definitely Takes It Well (sarcasm).

Jack, likely the next day or the day after that, gets an idea and decides to apply for a job as a nightguard. knowing that Henry will likely immediately recognize him and stop him from doing this (because, at this point, while he doesn't know what Henry's done, he does logically know that Henry might keep him from getting the job because he might tamper with the investigation), and likely being incredibly drunk, wears a fake mustache and just hopes Henry won't be able to recognize him. Henry does, but decides to play along with this, and just straight up doesn't tell Jack about the Murder Robots That Will Kill Him. (you Cannot tell me that Henry didn't recognize Jack. there's no way).

Henry either tells him to come back the following night (if Jack did this the day before scenes 3-4) or that night (if Jack did this on the same day as scenes 3-4)

Jack Gets Fucking Drunk And Runs To Work, Finding The Building Empty

Jack mentions in Dsaf 2, if he chooses to tell his own springlock story, that whatever animatronic killed him had caught him off-guard. animatronic footsteps, if we're going by Fnaf at least, Are Really Loud and Noticeable. if Jack were drunk and distracted by, say, grief, however...

Jack gets stuffed into Fredbear by Springbonnie and gets springlocked.

we know the rest from here: Henry finds him and leaves him to die, he gets revived, etc etc.

anyway, there's my entire interpretation of that cutscene from DSAF 3. it's really long, but like. This Was Just Straight Up What I Thought Had Happened The First Time I Had Watched That Cutscene (at least kinda)

#dsaf #jack kennedy #Boy. This Took Me A While

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himehikoshrine · 7 months

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Himehiko Timeline

This is my best attempt to gather the information we get about the Tamasaka Himehiko line and thus the game universe timeline. It is based on what I've found in the game and bonus material, but it may yet be incomplete. If you have any information I'm missing, please let me know. It's also always possible we get more lore drops in extra material.

It'll be behind a cut, so I will edit any additional information into the post. If I add things, I'll try to keep track here of when the last edit was. This will obviously contain spoilers for the full game (especially Kisa's route - major spoilers for Kisa's route) as well as bits of side material. Specifically the First Anniversary Short Story and the Summer Light Novel, though also the pre-release short stories on the website and others.

Shout out to the other people who seem to have independently attempted the same project, including Anemone (@ snowblossom_jj on twitter) for something to double check myself against. Before I go right into the Himehiko Timeline, I'm going to put in some Japanese Theater History for context, though it's worth noting none of this is referenced specifically in the game and may differ within the Jack Jeanne universe.

As always, happy to answer questions via asks or elsewhere if you have them.

Japanese Theater History potentially of note.

1374 - Kan'ami (観阿弥) and 12 year old son Zeami (世阿弥) perform what would become known as Noh for the teenage shogun Ashikaga Yoshimitsu (足利義満) who is so impressed by Zeami he gives him patronage. Zeami is educated in court and eventually becomes the Shogun’s lover. At 22, after his father’s death, he takes over the family troupe and begins to integrate his classical education and Buddhist instruction into the art. He goes on to formalize Noh, write plays for it, and treatises on acting and the Philosophy of Drama that continue to be informative to this day.

Of note, the idea of “hana” 『花』 is one of his core tenants, and his formulation of “the flower of youth” vs “the flower of experience” is referenced in game, though not credited.

1603 - Izumo no Okuni (出雲阿国) creates Kabuki. It is originally performed by a troupe of all women.

1629 - Women are banned from Kabuki for “morality” leading to the form being taken over by “young men” who are later also banned for being too sexy, in moves through the next several decades.

Probably by the timeline we are given for Tamasaka, in our world, Kabuki would have been established as an all male form of theater, with men playing women’s roles referred to as “onnagata” as they are to this day. It is unclear if this history happens the same within the Jack Jeanne universe, as no mention of Kabuki itself happens in game, and Tamasakaza isn’t placed within it as a larger tradition, despite being described in much the way Kabuki is, suggesting perhaps in the Jack Jeanne universe, history diverges at some point.

1680s - Bunraku, (then known as Jourui) a form of Puppet Theater takes on something close to its modern form and starts becoming increasingly popular. Many famous Kabuki plays were originally written “for the puppets” and the literary tradition is considered overlapping.

1683 - Chikamatsu Monzaemon (近松門左衛門, 1653 – 1725) has his first verified play produced. He is sometimes called the “Shakespeare of Japan”. He would continue writing plays for both puppet theater and kabuki, until around 1715. He was a writer, but did not act. He is most famous for his lovers’ suicides.

HIMEHIKO TIMELINE

1st Himehiko - His name was Chuza Tsukihiko (中座月彦), and he lived sometime in the “mid-Edo period’ about 300 years before the present. Specific dates are hard to pin down, but we’re looking at around (or maybe a little before or after) 1700. It is likely not exactly 300 years ago, give or take a few years, as no one in the game mentions any kind of anniversary, and you’d assume the 300th (or 200th of the established settled troupe) would be marked and mentioned.

He’s canonically called a "bishonen" and was known to be able to play both male and female roles. At this time, in our universe, no women would have been allowed on stage. We know his troupe was all male.

He receives the patronage of a local lord (much like Zeami) - the lord of the castle in Hiraki - Hiraki Matsubara (開松原). Matsubara was considered very talented and is credited with the town flourishing under his rule as well as the creation of Tamasaka and Tamasakaza.

He is given the name Tamasaka Himehiko 玉阪比女彦 which he takes on, and which becomes the title passed down. (The name "Tamasaka" is mentioned to maybe be a play on the word 『偶さか』 implying a "rare, unusual kind of talent")

Though the troupe itself will be considered a traveling troupe for the next 100 years, it seems to have a sort of home base on that lord’s land. They are given land for a stage there, the forebearer of the Tamasaka theater that exists to day.

We know little about him, but one thing we know is that he was quite fond of the story of the catfish god in Ayahama (which is historically near where Hiraki Castle is), and used to dance in tribute there. The relationship between Tamasaka and the hot springs goes back all the way to him.

There is one Wisteria tree on Mt. Oodate, and he is said to have been fond of it. (Fuji Musume - 藤娘- is one of the most famous Kabuki dance/plays, though technically it would have, in our universe, postdated the first generation Himehiko, it is likely a reference).

He dies of “severe, violent emotional suffering”.

He is enshrined in Himehiko shrine, and may actually be buried there. He is worshipped there as a god of theatre, and a bringer of fortune in other endeavors as well. This would imply the shrine is established well before the troupe settles.

2nd - The next Himehiko is the elder brother of the first. We don’t know if the rule that was later in place that the title be passed to someone under the age of 30 was in place yet. It may imply that the troupe, like Zeami’s was a family affair at least in part, from the beginning, if his brother was considered the natural next head.

3rd - The eldest son of the 2nd.

History that happens at an unclear point in the timeline after this --

At some point after this, though it does not seem to be specifically after the 3rd, in the way it’s told, one generation of Himehiko will choose to pass the title onto an adopted son. Rather than the adopted son taking the Chuza name as well, this son becomes the start of a new branch family, known as the Tamasaka branch. From this point on, the title will occasionally pass between the Tamasaka and Chuza branches, eventually developing into quite the rivalry. The Tamasaka branch became known as “true flowers” or the more talented of the two branches. The exact timeline of all of this unclear.

At some point, after several early, tragic deaths of people carrying the Himehiko name, both branches of the family begin to speak of a “Himehiko Curse” - which causes those who take the title to die young. They believe in this so strongly that people from both branches will sometimes pass up the title, or defer it, to try to avert the fate. However, it doesn’t seem to be something that affects every Himehiko. Just enough of them for it to be considered a threat in the family.

How it operates and if it is one of the genuine supernatural forces in the Jack Jeanne universe is unclear. The first Himehiko dies of severe mental suffering. The cause of death for others is not established.

It is possible that, either supernaturally or non-supernaturally, it is the distillation of the stress, politics, rivalries, burdens, and expectations of the theatre.

All of this happens and is well established between the 3rd Himehiko and the 10th Himehiko, but specifics are vague.

At some point, a rule is added that the title is past to a young man under the age of 30.

It seems some people may pass the title down before they die, rather than it only transferring via death. It is unclear the effect this has on the curse within the narrative of it. At another point, rather than taking the full stage name of Himehiko, each generation takes only half as their stage name - either Hime or Hiko, plus an additional character. This was done to try to avoid the “curse”. It does not work.

4th - A tree in the courtyard of Himehiko Shrine, which contains many trees, including many fruit trees, is said to have been planted by him. All we get is that the tree is “planted in the lucky direction.”

It is possible this is an Ume tree, which apparently can be considered a protective charm against evil and is traditionally planted in the northeast corner of a garden. Other than this, I can’t find much — the other mentions of lucky directions change by year, and don't seem to be what’s being referred to.

5th - nothing is known

6th - nothing is known

7th - Established Tamasaka Drama School as per random Neji encounter. Neji says he ‘fell in love with…’ and is then cut off. We get no other info from that encounter, or elsewhere.

It’s possible that the establishing of the Drama School coincided with the settling of the Troupe from a traveling one to a stationary one, but that’s not mentioned directly. If so, that would put 7th at about 100 years after the 1st, and about 200 years before the present.

It is unclear if from this point on all Himehiko’s also serve as Principal of the School or not.

At some point “several generations back (from present)” the principal of the school plants Night Jasmine on Mt. Oodate.

(About 200 years ago, the Takashina Style of dance is founded as a family dance tradition. It has no association with Tamasakaza, but given it’s part of the timeline we get, plus the Kabuki/Nihon Buyo overlap in our universe, I’m putting it on here.)

8th - The tree he planted at the shrine is the most prominent one. No other info is known.

9th - nothing is known.

10th - From the Tamasaka Line. Very likely the older brother of the 11th - According to the Anniversary Short Story, he dies a shocking and tragic death (that would fit within the narrative of the Himehiko Curse). The title would then be passed to his younger brother.

11th - Real name Tamasaka Shikitoshi 玉阪志木年 - stage name unknown. He is the current head of the troupe during the Meiji era merger of Hikari and Tamasaka, as depicted in the Anniversary Short Story. That takes place in 22nd year of the Meiji Era - 1889, giving us our first firm date.

According to Tancho, the lead Hiko actor at the time was rather critical and nagging of him, but in the events depicted in Neji’s play, ultimately is willing to almost give his life to protect 11th.

In Neji’s telling of the events he is described as innovative, as well as a very shrewd politician. And rather indifferent or reckless about threats against his own life.

He has two daughters and no sons. Presumably no one else in the Tamasaka branch has any sons of eligible age either. To prevent the name from passing back to the Chuza branch, and perhaps as a test on the limits of the Himehiko Curse, to see if it would spare women, Shikitoshi passes the title to his second daughter.

We have no information on why not the first daughter - whether she was over 30, or less skilled, or didn’t want it - all we know is that he passed it to his second daughter.

12th - The second daughter of the 11th. Member of the Tamasaka Family. First and only female Himehiko. The tree she donated to the shrine is marked with an actor’s crest of clappers — something recognizable as specifically belonging to her.

Despite being a woman, she was not just a figurehead, and actively acted in Tamasaka Plays. There is at least one that she was quite fond of, that involved a Kimono salesperson and a woman walking around on “Izayoi” - a play that the troupe stopped performing after her early and tragic death.

Tagane was involved in a revival of this play at some point, likely a pretty clear sign of his loyalty to the Tamasaka Branch faction.

At some point, it is likely that she placed a platinum Kanzashi bearing her crest in a wooden box in a tree hollow near Himehiko Shrine, following the superstition and custom born out of the Tamasaka play “Tearful Kanzashi." “Tearful Kanzashi" depicts a young woman (the fourth daughter of a man with no sons, who is abused and locked away by her father in anger after her birth also kills her mother) putting the Kanzashi her lover gives her into a tree by a shrine she stops at to pray to be reunited with him in the next life, before throwing herself off a cliff. (For more, see the Summer Light Novel chapter).

This also takes place on the 16th night of the lunar cycle. It is unclear if the play is the same one — but since the summary is given to Suzu and Kisa by a Kimono salesman, it seems unlikely that it wouldn’t include that detail if it were the same — rather it seems likely Tearful Kanzashi predates the 12th, and Tamasaka just has a lot of plays that use "Izayoi" in them.

This may indicate that the 12th takes her own life like the woman in the play, but it’s all speculation beyond that her death fits within the narrative of the Himehiko Curse.

After her early, tragic death, the title passes back to the Chuza Branch, and the whole incident/experiment is considered a disaster.

12th's older sister, and thus the surviving Tamasaka Branch go into hiding of some kind. She has children, thus continuing the line, under an assumed name. The Tamasaka branch retains supporters both in the troupe and the town, who believe that the Tamasaka branch have true talent that the Chuza branch lacks.

13th - Chuzu Dairi (中座内吏), stage name Uchihime (内比女).

After the death of the 12th, the title passes back to the Chuza line for the first time in 80 years. He quickly makes a new rule, reserving the Himehiko title for the Chuza branch, further pushing the Tamasaka branch into hiding and out of power.

We know he was born in the Meiji era (ended 1912) and lived until Showa (started 1926).

He had a strong interest in western style plays and musicals, and is the one who renamed the Tamasaka Drama School to Univeil Drama School, as well as changing the roles from Hiko and Hime to Jack and Jeanne within the school.

(For what it’s worth, Takarazuka is started in 1913. It was based heavily on western, particularly French musical Revue in direct contrast to Kabuki. It was started by a businessman in the city of Takarazuka as an all women’s theater company. Much of Jack Jeanne is based on a gender swap of Takarazuka as inspiration, but its timeline and the actual style of Tamasaka do not match Takarazuka. But this is a Himehiko Timeline so no more on Takarazuka for now.)

He apparently made a good deal of innovations to the troupe as well, and seems to have been quite active and hands on in both.

It’s hard to pin down how long and exactly when he lived and was in charge.

Kisa’s class being the 78th class would put the first numbered class in 1942, which is a particularly strange year for a traditional theater school in Japan for young, fit boys to be rebranding to a western aesthetic. It would literally be months after the attack on Pearl Harbor and several years into a war that greatly disrupted all forms of theater, calling most able bodied men to arms, rather than dance - so that’s something to consider when trying to fit the timeline. Perhaps there are years missing - a reversion to the old name, a pause in the numbering, but for some reason they pick up from where they left off, rather than restart? There is no indication in any material of any of this, either way.

14th - Takahiko (鷹彦) - the grandfather of Chuza Shuri, the current/18th Himehiko. Written with the character for “Hawk” and is noted as having very sharp eyes, but otherwise looking very much like Shuri. The game’s timeframe puts him taking up the title some time when black and white portraits were still most common, but recent enough that an old lady alive and walking around Tamasaka remembers him as a young man.

Apparently, he married a wealthy local family’s daughter after taking the position of Himehiko - and this old woman remembers having a crush on him at the time, and being disappointed - so one could guess that she was at least in her teens then.

The game’s menu actually says he’s the one who designed the school, rather than 13th - so perhaps Takahiko is the one who designed it architecturally - even if the rebrand happened before hand.

15th - nothing specifically is known

16th - nothing specifically is known

17th - nothing specifically is known

We know nothing about these or the order they were in, but one was almost certainly Shuri's father. In the anniversary short story, Tancho mentions Shuri's father by name. His name seems to have been Chuza Osamu (中座倫). From what Tancho says, the implication is that Shuri's father maybe have been principal before him, whether right before or not is not clear, or if he served this role concurrent with the title of Himehiko or not is also unclear. As previously stated, it's unclear if Principal of the School and Head of the Troupe are jobs all Himehiko's serve as part of the title, or if only some do. So it's possible that he held one and not the other or one for longer than the other - i.e. continued running the school after passing the name down or something.

All we get is the name, and that Tancho both knew/knows him and what his preference for incense was/is (and that its different than Shuri's).

It is possible an uncle and/or brother of his also held the position, as there is a nephew of his in Tamasakaza right now, which means Shuri has at least one (almost certainly) older sibling.

18th - Chuza Shuri (中座秋吏), stage name Akihime (秋比女) (Written with the character for Autumn, a kanji from his given name).

Currently the principal who is not well liked by Tamasaka Elders. Still seems to technically be the head of the troupe, but displays no desire to actually do anything onstage and finds his obligations to the Troupe to be a chore. Considers himself decent enough at both dance and singing (apparently singing is something Chuza branch is usually considered weaker in, or so he says).

He is in tension with the board over many things - Chui says the situation around him is “worse than you know,” implying there may be far more going on than anyone tells Kisa, and thus the player.

The Tamasaka Elders seem, from what we’re told, to want to make Univeil into more of a training school for Tamasaka (again?) - and Chuza is resistant to the idea.

19th - In a weekend event, the old lady in Tamasaka who tells Kisa about the 14th seems to state Akihime is the previous rather than current Himehiko (at least in the English). But everyone else seems to refer to him as the current one. Maybe she’s misremembering, maybe she’s got Opinions on his lack of participation and how much the board hates him - which she also mentions. Who knows.

The two candidates for the position seem to be Chui - the Tamasaka branch heir, and already seen as kind of a god, and Shuri's nephew (mentioned in a VERY missable Sou event on 8/1 - who is currently a Hime actor in Tamasaka, who is “treated like a king” as part of the Chuza family there. He apparently doesn’t resemble Shuri much.)

One presumes the Tamasaka board has its factions on which one they support, and, regardless, are preparing them to hold the position more to the boards liking than Shuri.

#jack jeanne #jack jeanne lore #tamasaka himehiko #lore hunting #timeline #reference #the brainrot is bad #really bad

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penncilkid · 11 months

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Hello hello! My name is PK and I'm a fervent enjoyer of non-canon ships. I'm not a fic writer exactly but I've been told "Where's the fic OP" twice now by my friends. So I thought I'd format one of my fic-adjacent ramble sessions for Tumblr!

Pairing: Milo/David [No Sweetheart or Angel, wanted to go easy on myself] [MDNI*] [Let's call this "canon reminiscent /lh]

Word Count: 3.2 K

*(I wouldn't consider this smut by any means but there's a few lines that make me want to add this as a tag)

[As a reminder, I diverge from canon quite a bit with this. This is just one route I could see leading to Milo and David getting together]

My vision for this pair is that they start getting closer in a more than just friends way a little bit after Gabe dies. Not immediately because have some decorum, but it would start during that transition period for David as Alpha. Asher is trying his best to help but is also grappling with the whole Beta thing, so he feels like he's in a complex position. But him and Milo can see that David's not doing great so Milo's like "Fine, I'll bite the bullet" and tries to confront David about it.

At first it's subtle, asking David if he needs help with something, if he wants anyone from the pack to stay after for meetings, if he wants them to pick up a shift so he can have the day off, etc. But David is too stubborn to accept any of it so he keeps brushing them off. This ends up culminating in a "fight" one day where Milo again tries to make an offer that David shoots down. Milo sort of snaps and is like "Alright, what the fuck gives? Why are you acting like you're too good to get help anymore, David?" David says he doesn't know what he's talking about, Milo calls bullshit. It doesn't turn into a screaming match but it's enough of a heated argument that Milo storms out of the den.

In the days following, Milo either calls out sick, switches shifts with people, anything to avoid seeing David. David brushes it off, thinking he's got more important things to worry about if Milo's going to throw a fit. But of course, Ash being Ash means this stuff can't fly for long, so he tells both David and Milo that he needs help with something at an odd time of day and then "coincidentally" doesn't show up. When Milo gets to the den, he's real tempted to get back in his car and leave. It's a mix of still being a little frustrated with David and being embarrassed that this "fight" has gone on for as long as it has. He walks up to David (who was waiting outside for Asher) and is like "Lemme guess, you're waiting for Ash?" "How did you...?" "Fucker told me the same thing."

They do some lighthearted bitching about their friend, which eases the tension. There's a bit of silence and right as Milo gets ready to apologize for speaking out of turn, David apologizes first. He acknowledges that Milo was right in what he said and that he's been struggling with everything changing, but he hasn't wanted it to show on the outside. Milo makes a light jab at David, "Alright well did you really expect that to go over my head? C'mon, David, we've known each other since we were kids. Gimme some credit" To make up for it, the two of them go out to eat, all that's chill. Cut to when Milo gets home, maybe has a drink or two as he's winding down. David sends him a message, confirming he made it home alright (because I've always latched onto the idea that he's super attentive to that given what happened with Gabe). Milo sends David a quick reply and wonders why seeing that message made him feel some type of way (romantic? Who knows, not Milo that's for sure /lh)

Now if I remember correctly, the audio where Angel learns about Gabe, it's been around 3 years since his passing. Keeping this in mind and in the spirit of being canon reminiscent, I think around/after this point is when Milo's feelings for David start to really bubble up. They've been building for awhile, much to his dismay. He's trying to play it cool, but his heart's in his damn throat any time David touches him casually or whenever the two of them are assigned to a job together. And he knows it's getting bad enough where he might lose focus, so he swallows his pride and does what he's been avoiding for months, if not years: asking Asher for advice.

"Alright, look: You and me both know that you had a lil crush on David when we were in high school. How the fuck did you get over it? I'm drowning, Ash." If this conversation is happening on the phone or at Asher's place, cue him yelling to Babe that they owe him 20 bucks (because it's funny to me <3). Asher asks Milo why he wants to get over the feelings so bad and Milo's like "'Cause this is David we're talking about." "So what?" "We've got... history. That complicates shit all on its own." "And?" "....Alright fine, and I'm also terrified he's not gonna feel the same. Happy?" Asher is being the little shit that he is, putting his arm around Milo's shoulder. "Listen. If I know David— And believe me, I do— What ya gotta do is be direct. If he doesn't feel the same, that's one thing. But if you even want a chance, you gotta be straight up with him. If you tried to ask him out casually, he'll just assume you're being friendly because that's what you are right now. Friends." Milo takes all this in and is like, "Nope, just gonna shove these feelings down for eternity." "I'll tell Marie—" "I will beat your ass." He knows Asher has a point though. Any idea Milo might've had could be easily construed as them just chilling as friends. But he doesn't really act on anything for awhile.

Now, before we get into the next phase of this, some added backstory: David had a crush on Milo growing up. I'm thinking a little after high school (won't say college necessarily since I don't picture them in college but like, young adulthood phase). He'd always found Milo incredibly attractive and found his boldness admirable in general. David was constantly thinking about what he had to do for others and how to make the pack look good (since he was the Alpha's kid then the pack Beta). Milo always felt incredibly refreshing to be around. But he figured Milo would never be interested in because David's just himself so he eventually got over it. Cut to that argument him and Milo had a few years back. He remembers that night when they made up because dinner had been fine but all he could do was focus on Milo. It felt nice to just hang out with him without the pressures of being Alpha. And he enjoyed listening to him talk about anything because he always had a strong opinion. I think around then is when his past feelings awoke again but there was a new obstacle: He was the Alpha of the pack. It wasn't like before, things were different. He'd never have a chance to pursue Milo without feeling like he had pushed Milo into a corner somehow. So again, he tried his best to push his feelings down, appreciate and value the friendship he had with Milo and leave it at that. It was enough to just have Milo in his life, even if it wasn't going to go any further.

Back to how these two end up together: the Moonbound Solstice. They're all at David's place, everyone's having a good time together. Milo's chilling, talking to someone from the pack when Asher cuts in and is like "Sorry, just gonna steal him for a minute" "Ash, you can't just— AY okay okay I'm coming" They walk off, somewhere far from the kitchen to minimize the risk of David overhearing. In hushed voices: "Alright, so what's the plan?" "Ash, what the fuck are you talking about?" "Milo, it's the Solstice. This is the perfect time to make a move." "Are you out of your damn mind? This is the last place I should be hitting on— On you know who." "What are you talking about it, it's perfect! The whole pack's here, no one would even notice." "Look, he's already got his hands full hosting the Solstice at his own place for a change. I'm just gonna chill and enjoy the night for what it is." Asher is pouting as Milo walks off, immediately thinking of what he can do to help nudge David Milo's way. (Unhinged alt route: Ash giving Milo a flat so he has to stay the night)

Cut to the end of the night, people are heading out and whatnot. David is subtly trying to get people out because he loves his pack but his senses need a break. Asher (+ Babe, package deal) and Milo offer to stay and help clean, and David lets them since it's only a handful of people. Milo's keeping his cool, vibing to the much lower playing music when: "Babe, what do you mean you have a work call you need to take tonight? Can't it wait?" "Sorry, Ash, I need to be home in the next twenty minutes" "Alright. Guess we're heading early." Milo thinks nothing of it until he makes eye contact with Babe. They smile with a sickeningly sweet wave. Those bastards. Before Milo can try to rope Ash into staying somehow, the two of them are gone.

When Milo and David are alone, Milo tries his best to focus on the task at hand because feelings or not, he's not gonna do a shit job at cleaning so David has to clean up after him. Once the bulk of it is done, David mentions that he needs to grab something from upstairs or maybe says he's going to go change out of his clothes (I imagine he put on something better looking but not as comfortable for the solstice). Milo's chill with that, getting his keys, phone, other personal belongings together. He happens to slip into the kitchen though, stealing a bit more of the food David had made for the solstice. While he's stealing (said with love), he hears very close to his ear: "You can take some home if you want." He nearly punches David, gripping his arm as he tries to slow his heart rate. "You tryin' give a guy a heart attack, Shaw (/lh)" because he legit didn't hear David come back downstairs. "Maybe if you weren't busy trying to steal some food, you would've heard me— Greer (/lh)." Milo rolls his eyes with a grin and there's a moment of quiet when he realizes his hand is still on David's arm.

He lets go, clearing his throat, confirming that it's actually cool if he wants to take some of the food home with him. David says sure, giving him a container to fill (or Milo takes whatever the food came in, not sure what I'm picturing David's cooking set-up to be). David walks Milo to the door (as a good host does) and the two of them talk in the doorway for a few minutes about upcoming jobs, responsibilities, all that formal shit. There's another quiet moment as the two of them watch each other. Inside, Milo's like "Alright, no one else is here. This is as good a chance as any." The second he gets ready to ask David out on a more proper date, David instead says "Good night, Milo" and essentially closes the door in his face. Milo stares for a moment before cursing himself in Spanish (my HC), walking to his car and muttering about how "Of course he was just being polite, what the fuck were you thinking?" On the other side of the door, David is groaning into his hands, face warm as he tries to calm down because he came way too close to making a move on Milo.

Intermission (Wow, you're still reading? Damn /pos): I wanted to think of how to push them closer to a confession before they actually get together and eventually settled on "sickfic shenanigans". Insert deliriously sick Milo whose phone died and he can't find a charger for the life of him so David goes over to his place to check on him. Initially, he's trying to get David to leave because "I can handle myself fine". But that doesn't last long because admittedly, he feels like shit and has been for the past 12 hours. The dynamic quickly turns into Milo convincing David to stay then being so sick his filter is hanging on by a thread (/lh). "Why do you have to go rush off so fast?" "Milo, I have a pack to take care of—" "First off, I'm part of the pack— (cue Milo coughing) And second, they'll be fine without their Alpha for a few hours." Milo's playing it off as lighthearted but David can tell he doesn't want to be cooped up inside alone on top of feeling like shit physically. A little later, when Milo's on the verge of falling asleep (as many do while sick), he's like "Y'know, it's fucking wild you don't got a mate, David. Like look at you. Doesn't make sense" David laughs at first, thinking Milo's sick delirious (which he is, but that's affecting his filter, not the validity of his words). He's like "ay, why are you laughing, I'm serious. Look— if I were ya mate, I'd treat ya right. I'd cook, I'd work extra hours so I could see ya, I'd make sure we're the best dressed wherever we go— not to mention, I got a great dick." David writes this off as Milo being sick and spewing nonsense but never forgets the words. Meanwhile, Milo (after getting over the sickness) is convinced he dreamt saying any of that to David.

Back to the present, David's been a bit stressed with work as of late so Asher suggests the pack take a trip/weekend vacation. He says he'll handle figuring everything out, letting David take a backseat this time. They go somewhere, a resort, a hotel, something that involves people having rooms they're staying in. Everyone's having a good time, chilling all day, night rolls around. David's in his room when he realizes he forgot to pack something— can be anything. Toothpaste, a charger, something for his hair, the specifics aren't important. He texts Asher, asking if he has the thing he forgot and Ash is like yeah. David asks Ash which room he's staying in, Ash texts him the room number. David leaves his room, goes there, knocks and waits patiently. Door opens, and who's standing there? Milo, shirtless and in the middle of brushing his teeth or some shit.

David's checking his phone to see if he went to the wrong room but nope, numbers match. "Asher must've made a typo. I just needed to borrow something from him." "Well, what did you need? Maybe I have it." Before David can leave, Milo's busy ushering him in, closing the door so he can finish brushing his teeth before finding what David needs. They're making idle conversation, talking about what they spent their respective days doing. While Milo's talking, David's kind of staring at his back, not processing a word he's saying. Milo turns around and notices and is like "What? Don't tell me there's a bug on me and you didn't say shit? (/lh)" and David is trying to think of a good cover up. Milo tries to lighten the mood, says he's just messing with David before going to find whatever David's looking to borrow. He finds it, hands it over when for a split second, his eyes land on David's crotch. David leaves shortly there after but all night, Milo's like "...That was a boner... why the fuck did he have a boner?" But again, Milo's mind is like "Nah, I'm reading this wrong somehow."

Now, I'm painting a picture: it's the next day, Ash, Milo, David, few others from the pack plan on doing something together while on the trip. Asher gets there a bit late but is somehow on time compared to David, who shows up minutes after (that man was up all night pining). Ash notices Milo's not here yet and has a devious idea (as always). He asks David to go check on Milo so they can go. "Why me?" "You were the last one here, it's only fair. Now shoo." David rolls his eyes but goes, getting to Milo's room, knocking. He can hear Milo's definitely inside because he's cursing and complaining. He knocks again before the door swings open to reveal a mildly disgruntled Milo Greer (my vision is he's in pants and a white tank with his name chain. The in between outfits outfit).

He asks what David is doing there, David explains that Asher sent him to pick up Milo, Milo's like "What time is it— Jesus fucking Christ." The issue at hand is Milo can't find an article of clothing that he swears he put in his bag. He's been trying to get by with alternative options but none of them look the way he wants them to, which is making him quietly lose his shit. David stifles a laugh, to which Milo lasers in on. "And what do you think you're laughing at?" "You haven't changed since we were kids, that's all." Milo scoffs but admittedly, the sentiment puts a smile on his face. Almost immediately after that moment, he finally finds what he was looking for (tucked under something, irrelevant right now). He starts to get ready, pulling his shirt on, buttoning it up but let's say a button or two is fighting him for whatever reason. Without a second thought, David walks up, buttoning it for Milo. Milo's having an internal moment as a result, staring at David's hands then his face. David finishes and looks up to catch Milo staring. He clears his throat, saying something about waiting in the hall when Milo catches his wrist.

"Can I take you out on a date?" "What?" "I don't know what or where yet, but I just— I know this is probably stupid and I'm shooting myself in the foot here, but Asher's gonna kick my ass if I don't do something so— Can I take you out on a date, David?" David's taken aback. "Wait... so you were serious. That time you were sick. All that stuff you said about being a good mate for me." "THAT WASN'T A DREAM?" Cue Milo letting go of David's hand and nearly cursing himself out, running a hand through his hair because now he's mortified. "I can't believe I actually said all that shit to you—" "Did you mean it?" "Huh?" For the first time, David's not looking at Milo like a friend or pack Alpha. The look in his eyes screams pure, unfiltered attraction. "Yes or no, Milo." Milo's face is hot, "Course I meant it. I'd treat you great if you gave me the chance to show you." David steps closer, gripping Milo's face gently and tilting it up towards his. "Show me." Milo grins before pulling David down to him, the kiss they shared far better than the ones he remembered from spin the bottle games they'd played as teens. This kiss felt deeper and closer than that could ever compare. The moment they break away, gasping for air, Milo's busy unbuttoning his shirt. David asks what he's doing, to which Milo replies "I'm about to savor as much time with you as I can before I have to see Asher's smug face. Unless you'd like to explain how your hair became a mess between the time you left to find me and when you get back?" David laughs before pulling Milo to him again.

So yeah, that concludes this fic adjacent ramble (/lh)! I love rarepairs and rambling, so if people enjoy this, I may format some other rambles as they arise. I think I've got some Sam/David tucked away somewhere, so let me know. If you actually read all of this, wow, okay, thank you (/lh /pos)

#redacted david #redacted milo #redacted rambles #rarepair #mdni #PK Fic Adjacents #Making a tag now because who knows #redacted asmr #redacted audio #redacted rarepairs #Also yes I'm inconsistent in how I write Milo's style of speaking #I'm vibing so what /lh

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reginrokkr · 3 months

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Under cut I'll be slipping a bit of talk related to a questline of Chenyu Vale alongside some personal thoughts in regards of what makes my portrayal of Dain canon divergent, now that the dash is being silent!

While I can say with full confidence that it made me very happy in terms of lore and confirmation of thoughts I had about Dain, I was thrown once again into this spiral of displeasure. This mainly concerns a rhetoric that repeats itself over and over in Genshin, but as of lately it's become to levels where it's ridiculous at this point.

Since always, I've been an advocate that there is no need for the Traveler to fix crises that oh, surprise, the cast of every nation can by themselves. I understand that this comes from the perspective of a weirdly introduced character / self-insert that the devs themselves treat as a self-insert in pretty much every livestream they do to introduce an incoming patch.

What kind of became the last straw to me this time is that we have a character with one of his titles being Bough Keeper. His connection to Irminsul can't be more evident with the narration of most of the miscellanies and I highly doubt that this title in particular comes from thin air. Mainly because Irminsul acts as an entity of its own, sentient, that does things on its own volition as well. Dain's connection with it is, most likely than not, a result from the fact that Irminsul allows it to be for whatever reasons it has.

Now, I'm going to double down and say that he's a character who, as of now, has the freedom to go anywhere he pleases too. Most of the canon divergences I established in this blog for him are related with the fact that it's the Traveler the one made to fix issues related with Ley Lines, Irminsul or emanations of Irminsul scattered across Teyvat as we go. And while yes, I get that as some manner of self-insert (while at the same time not, it's a very strange mix HYV did here) it's us who have to witness every little thing under the sun that happens in Teyvat, this takes away from what other characters can do by themselves without Traveler's help.

Suffice to say, fixing the crisis of Chenyu Vale going against the flow of time as per Lingyuan's deeds for her reasons will be one more point to add to the list of canon divergences I have for Dain. But at the same time, I've been genuinely wondering if these would be canon divergences at all for the reasons stated above. This will be something to give some more thought in the future, but I do find unfair to treat this as a divergence when it's something in the actual realm of possibilities for Dain.

#◟༺✦༻◞ what lays behind the mantle of faux stars ┊ooc.┊#I'm sorry if I sound salty about the concept of canon divergence #that isn't the case at all #but it's the circumstances that lead me #to brand this blog as such that kind of gets to me #alongside the awful narrative choices to have us witness everything

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lhenn · 5 months

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Karina

This is Karina’s story, a story of how she grew up in the cellars of a theatre, surrounded by music and dreaming of sharing it with the world, of how she made two friends (a sad ballerina and a rat), of how she has learnt from her teacher everything she’s ever known, asking half the questions she yearns to learn and receiving half the answers she expects, suspecting this mysterious and distant man, yet so familiar to her, keeps a lot of secrets within. But he’s always been honest with her, always taken care of her, given her everything she’s ever wished for, has he not? There were only a few rules she had to adhere to, so as to keep everything the way it had always been: she should take care of herself and not get hurt, never leave their place, never talk with people and never mention their names nor where they live. But the days are long and lonely for her, especially as she grows up, head full of dreams and nothing new left to try: little adventures to the theatre should be fine as long as no one finds out… right? Or so she thought during the eight years she spent sneaking into the theatre when Erik wasn’t watching her (or was he?). Until one day, Karina’s reality is shattered after her professor suddenly disappeared, forcing her to leave the lair and venture into the outside world, and it won’t take her long to discover that half the things Erik had taught her were a lie…

A bit of context

I’ll be posting bits of Karina’s backstory (my OC). She’s the D&D character I’m currently playing; developing her backstory and finding a fitting campaign has taken me almost two years! Sometimes it feels like an awful lot, thinking my first D&D OC Kaze’s backstory took me around 7 months to complete, but then I think about Lhena, my first ever OC, whose story is still under development after 8 years, and it feels so short (I like writing, so I craft PDFs -like, kinda long PDFs? More than 100 pages- to practice).

I’ve had three main inspirations (although they have kinda turned out to be 4 in the end, I won’t name the last one until it’s shown in the story): Phantom of the opera (mainly musical, both 2004 film and stage versions, there might be some nods to Leroux’s original novel though), Disney’s Tangled and the 1986 film Labyrinth.

The main reference is poto, it’s present everywhere, and yet it isn’t. I didn’t want to know what was going to happen next following Karina’s backstory, I never intended to do a retelling, so even though there are many similarities this is not Phantom of the opera, it will not be canon compliant nor follow the story.

Having said that, Karina is 18 yo as of now. She’s a genius when it comes to arts, her abilities will be shown along the story, I don't wish to spoil anything, although you can deduce that she, at least, possesses an unearthly, angelic voice. Almost all her knowledge she owes to her mysterious teacher… You might have already guessed, or maybe not, but Karina is the result of mixing Christine and Erik’s characters. In my opinion, this adds a fantastic turn of events and a very interesting divergence from poto (Erik’s character is still present -kind of).

Speaking about the campaign, we’re playing in a post-apocalyptic setting! A world where people live either behind walls or in small communities -tribes- fighting machines… (you can picture Horizon and The 100 to get an idea). But that’s a tale ought to tell in a different moment, taking place far away from where we are, a tale little Karina does not even dream about, shielded by music in the deep underground.

Most of my drawings are sketches, and I'm not fooling myself, I'm a disorganized student and I don't know when or if I'll finish them (although I want to and I plan to). The one above is Karina during last session. Her hair's a bit messed up because there was a combat (Such a thrilling third day outside!) and, as the party has claimed: «she technically is still alive» (and I don't know how to draw hair). I also don't know how to draw consistent faces, I'm trying :')

#oc #oc art #my ocs #K the phantom #my art #my writing #blog intro #my doodles #dnd art #dnd character #dnd oc #original character #erik makes an appearance #(mentioned)#phantom of the opera #the phantom of the opera #but with a spin #to be continued #lhen art

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depizan · 2 years

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well, with the Emperor being dead-all-along, I am curious about many characters who's story is connected to him: Scourge; Kira, Syo Bakarn, and the other Children; the Hand of the Emperor; Tol Braga and his strikte team

A lot of the Force User class stuff exists in something of a quantum state - because my fics don't focus on those classes, I haven't nailed down exactly how much stays "canon" in ficverse.

Oddly, though, the Emperor being dead would make surprisingly little difference. The Children are a fine sleeper agent idea even if it isn't actually the Emperor controlling them when they're activated, just a powerful Sith Lord, or some form of conditioned second personality. (Which, if I remember right, is how the First Son/Syo Bakarn thing worked, anyway.)

Kira can still struggle with the conditioning, just as she did the Emperor's influence, and overcome it. If anything, it just adds a potential layer of angst with the question of whether she really did escape (which I don't remember game canon questioning).

Tol Braga, if no one uses common sense and sits on him, can still assemble a strike team for his terrible idea of Emperor kidnapping. The Emperor turning out to be dead doesn't make this a notably better idea. He and his strike team just get caught by the conspiracy faking the Emperor's continued existence instead of by the Emperor. They likely wouldn't even find out it isn't the Emperor, and Braga can still have his turn to the Dark Side due to being a phenomenal idiot, er, I mean having an overabundance of pride.

Whether this mess will include Ianya and the Jedi Knight crew up to that point depends entirely on where in the ficverse story it ends up landing. If Ianya is still down for suicidal strikes on the Empire, it does; if she's discovered her daughter is alive and is doing better, then she'd recognize it for the horrible, horrible plan that it is and refuse to sign on. (Though she could still end up roped into trying to rescue Tol Braga's strike team.)

As for Scourge... *reads his wookieepedia entry* uh, what in all heck? Oookay, this could go one of two ways. Either Scourge is another Sir Not Existing in This Ficverse, and parts of Tol Braga's strike team and/or rescuers there of get aided by some other defecting Sith Lord or all of that very muchness or something akin to it is still true and Scourge just doesn't know that the Emperor's already dead (so much for Force visions - or his vision has mistaken discovery for action). If the latter, then the plan to kill the Emperor does happen, and they learn that he's been dead all along, stab his corpse a time or two, just to be sure and go from there. If the former, then perhaps this is where it's discovered that the Emperor has been dead for a bit, and everything diverges rather more from the game version of the story.

As a lot of this is more happening in the background, I'm not entirely sure what I'll end up going with. Though I'll probably at least keep the Force Sensitive sleeper agents thing. It helps with Kira and Ianya bonding over their questionable pasts, and gives them parallel darknesses to fight.

#ficverse ask meme #@maaruin #Ianya Solarin #further changes based on the pre-death of the Emperor

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vegaelettra · 2 years

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I've remember that ask meme in your blog, so let's go, let's go!

My ask is number 13!!! :)

Thank you for the ask @mamadalena ❤ (from this ask meme)

My writing style and the dead giveaways of my writing... this really needed a bit of introspection XD And I’m still not completely sure if I nailed the idea behind the question... hope it’ll be fine anyway! <3

But long answer, so under the cut this time too 😊

Present tense. To be honest, it's not like I always wrote in the present tense (I actually have hibernated WIPs, hWIP from now on, through the years that I wrote in the past tense, both in English and in my first language). In my current fandom though, I found it easier to write with it and I like how it sounds and how it flows. So, I think that if I'll have to write a secret fic at this time, I would absolutely use it.

Multi-POV. I think this would come into play more if the secret fic is going to be a long fic. I'm usually able to limit myself to a single POV in one-shots. In long fic, though, multi-POV all the way. Almost all my hWIPs are multi-POV, because I love the chance to explore more than one character, their ways of thinking, and their emotions. And how the plot is explored too between the different POVs. I just find it more fun, and writing fics should be fun so ;) Even more, I noticed that often an ensemble cast or a main character+interesting and participating second characters increase the chance of me at least outlining some idea for that fandom, so... it may not be a coincidence ;)

Chapters Title. This I think is something really minor, but I found out I really like giving titles to the chapters of my long fics (even when I have to think about it for days). I usually prefer something short/medium-short that manages to capture the feel of the chapter without giving in away too much (unless there's a reason to).

Canon Divergence/What-if. When I love a fandom (and this usually means I love the characters + a plot that at least I don't dislike too much), I love to explore how things could've been if something went just a little bit differently, if a character was in a place where they weren't or vice versa and things like that. There's something I really find appealing in the challenge and satisfaction of walking through the butterfly effect with my characters and readers. This happens a lot in my hWIPs too.

Missing Moments. While it's not as prominent as the point above, I found out through the years that is a thing I like too, to add that tiny bit that I thought missing in the story as it is and that they just didn't give me. it obviously happens more often with my one-shots. Not even my chronic longfic syndrome is able to span a missing moment on dozen of chapters (luckily. Unless is some kind of prequel thing or something like that...).

Female characters. To be clear, it's not that I don't like male characters or I don't like to write about them (U-won, Yi Jin, Yi Rim, Yang to just name a few about Rookie Historian are a clear proof). And, to be honest, I think I always end up with a good proportion between prominence given to male and female characters (even if it's a too reductive way to define what a character can be, but let's simplify this one time) in my fics. But, yes, female characters and their friendships and relationship are going to be central in my stories more often than not.

Dialogue and Inner Voice. I may write descriptions (and like it too), but one things that I love is writing dialogue between characters. Often, it’s the first thing I write down for a scene. I love trying to capture the specific character’s voice and try to make it pop out of the page (don’t know if it always work XD). That’s why I think of the characters’ inner voice as an extension of it. How can I do without something like Yang’s inner exasperation or Hae-ryung’s unapologetic remarks? ;)

Character Relationships. Friendship, family, romance, siblings, rivals, parent-child, whatever for better or worse, in the foreground or in the background of the characters' actions and thoughts, I love to weave and explore the relationships between the characters, how the plot can affect them/be affected by them and how they can affect the character themself. I love to create interesting (I hope) plots, but then I use them as a means to see the characters and make a deep dive into their emotions. This is one reason more why I like ensemble cast: they already give me things to work upon!

Happy ending. Or at least a hopeful one (The Flower that Bloom..., My One and Only Brother). Bittersweet if nothing else works (The Quiet Fall...). I may read/watch something with a sad/tragic ending, but I'm not going to go searching for it. And, usually, I'm not going to write it. I hopelessly love happy endings and, even if I'm going to send my characters through hell and back, you can bet I'm going to give them their happy ending (not that this means necessarily a sugarcoated one though).

And last one, to end with a laugh (I'm really not being serious here):

Being slooow. Not really something that you can call "writing style", but I couldn't help but mention it XD I mean, if you write a long fic as long as mine it surely is something really annoying and that really stands up in the end LOL

Hope this long-winded answer satisfied your ask! ^-^

This said, I'm sure I forgot some dead giveaways that are glaringly obvious to someone who read more than one of my fics and invisible to me.

If you or anyone else would like to add their two cents on my writing style, I'll love to read it and see how would you recognize my writing! <3

#happy fic writer ask game #ask meme #mamadalena's ask

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korpikorppi · 3 years

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FANFICS!

Thought I'd make a post, basically just a list of links, for the Untamed - Mo dao zu shi fanfics I've read and enjoyed. I'll be adding to this post (and reblogging this) every once in a while, and will also add a link to this in my pinned post. I will also move the previously posted content behind a cut at every update, so this will not get horribly long.

So, without further ado and in no particular order, here we go!

*Update August 25th*

Tumblr told me this post has reached the allowed maximum length, so this will be continued in FANFICS! Part Two 🙂.

*Update August 6th*

A stone to break your soul, a song to save it by rikke

Wangxian, mature, words: 180 247, chapters: 24/24

arranged marriage, alternate universe - canon divergence

When the entire cultivation world turns against Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng comes up with a plan to save him and arranges a marriage between his brother and the Second Jade of Lan, Lan Wangji.

Nothing gold can stay by rikke

Wangxian, mature, words: 10 353, chapters: 1/1

alternate universe - canon divergence

Before Wen Chao can throw him into Yiling Burial Mounds, Lan Wangji finds Wei Wuxian.

Nothing you confess by PorcupineGirl

Wangxian, teen and up, words: 31 083, chapters: 6/6

alternate universe - soulmates, soulmate-identifying marks, POV alternating, golden core reveal, depressed Wei Wuxian, PTSD, Jiang Cheng & Lan Wangji friendship, friendship may be too strong a word, more like allies who are gonna love the shit outta post-Burial-Mounds WWX whether he likes it or not, hurt/comfort, recovery

Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian have both been told since childhood that if you are lucky enough to have a soulmate, a red string will appear on your wrist the day you meet them. This is common knowledge.

What nobody ever told them, likely because nobody knew, is that if your soulmate loses their golden core, you can feel it happening.

A shared plate by yukla

Wangxian, teen and up, words: 25 814, chapters: 6/6

post-canon, pining, getting together, a little bit epistolary, let Wei Ying heal agenda, food as a representation of love and belonging, tentative Yunmeng shuangjie reconciliation, oh god the yearning

"Through the window, boats drift in a mirror of the yawning sky, fringed with wide lotus leaves and the pale yellow blossoms that grow year-round. Geese call in the distance. And there again, drifting through the air—the scent of sesame shaobing, and hot dry noodles, and the sizzle-pop of frying oil. Like the heat-haze of summer, softened with time. Like the taste of home."

Or, four meals Wei Wuxian shares during his travels, and one he shares with his soulmate.

Then there's no one there by etymologyplayground

Wangxian, teen and up, words: 12 694, chapters 1/1

missing scene, hurt/comfort, talking, fluff and angst, unresolved romantic tension, heavier on the angst than it is on the fluff but it gets pretty dang tender, literal sleeping together, cuddling & snuggling

"Oh, and speaking of pretty boys," Nie Huaisang says, turning back to Wei Wuxian's unconscious form, "Don't get me started on poor Second Master Lan. He's pathetic without you, you should really see him. He's practically in tears without you here to flirt with him! He's mooning over your corpse like —"

"Nie Huaisang, that's enough," Lan Wangji snaps. He struggles with what to address first; the worst is that, "Wei Ying is not a corpse. Don't say such things."

"Sorry," Nie Huaisang says. "But sitting there silently and willing him to wake up isn't going to help, Hanguang-Jun. You want him to wake up, right? Then tell him why!" He whacks Lan Wangji's shoulder lightly with his fan.

Or, Wei Wuxian is unconscious for three days after the fall of Qishan Wen. His friends worry themselves sick.

Night breezes seem to whisper by cqlorphan

Wangxian, explicit, words: 16 706, chapters: 2/2

dom/sub undertones, sex curse, fuck or die, case fic, getting together, under-negotiated kink, but like. for reasons, love confessions, fluff and smut, post-canon, mutual pining, hurt/comfort

"All the hair on the back of Lan Wangji’s neck stands straight. He finds himself pressed between the trunk of the tree at his front, and Wei Wuxian at his back. Wei Wuxian has a firm grip on the wrist which carries Bichen, and on his left upper arm. It feels... proprietary. Suddenly, and entirely inappropriately, a very old, very shameful memory surfaces, of a long-ago dream from which he had woken sweaty and shaking. The place on his chest where the resentment pierced him begins to throb painfully. Wei Wuxian breathes heavily against his ear for half a moment longer, and Lan Wangji feels himself flush."

Or; reuniting with Wei Wuxian after their year apart is complicated by a mysterious and deadly curse.

And his wanting grows teeth by yukla

Wangxian, teen and up, words: 25 398, chapters: 1/1

AU in canon setting, LWJ is a traveling cultivator, WWX is the adopted son of a village chief, angst, pining, the smallest bit of mystery, typical jiang family dynamics, warmth and belonging and the conflict between duty and desire, slight elements of horror

"I travel so I may do my duty as a cultivator. Not in order to make acquaintances.”

Wei Wuxian huffs in amusement. “Ehhh, Lan-daozhang, no way. I would’ve thought that a friendly guy like you would have friends in every region!”

Lan Wangji’s jaw clenches.

Or; in the dead of winter, traveling cultivator Lan Wangji gets snowed in at a remote mountain village, falls in love with the chief’s adopted son, and stumbles upon a dark secret that is decades in the making.

Fanart that made me read this fic.

*Update July 29th*

Beneath six layers of silk by darkredloveknot (enheduane)

Wangxian, explicit, words: 12 551, chapters: 1/1

post-canon, canon compliant, getting together, confessions, curses, embarrassment, vulnerability, Lan Zhan is hopelessly in love, dirty talk, hand jobs, angst and fluff and smut, honesty, communication

While exorcising a haunting, Lan Wangji gets cursed with a brand of honesty, and is forced to speak his every thought out loud.

Crack me open, pour you out by Tenillypo

Wangxian, explicit, words: 16 405, chapters: 3/3

post-canon, chief cultivator Lan Wangji, cursed Lan Wangji, protective Wei Wuxian, oblivious Wei Wuxian, misunderstandings, mutual pining, love confessions, angst with a happy ending, eventual smut, porn with feelings, cultivation discussion conferences

"Lan Zhan," Wei Ying says carefully, "do you truly not know you have been speaking?"

Lan Wangji claps a hand to his mouth and, to his horror, feels his mouth opening to answer despite having no intention to do so. Clamping it shut again takes a great effort."

Or, the one where Lan Wangji can't stop talking, and a mild amount of chaos ensues.

Twelve moons and a fortnight by stiltonbasket

Wangxian & basically the whole gang, general, words: 290 322: chapters: 51/51

humor, post-canon fix-it, long-distance relationship, epistolary, love letters, family feels, ft. the yunmeng bros being bros, and the junior ducklings being precious, teenage romance, adoption, parenthood, politics, case fic, plot, fluff and angst, gratuitious social reform, as expected when wwx is left in charge of a government without supervision, junmeng jiang sect, sect leader wei wuxian, slow burn, the burn is very fast actually wwx is just clueless, worldbuilding, weddings

"Let me get this straight. You really want me to stand in for you while you help Jin Ling settle in at Koi Tower?"

"Who else do I have?" Jiang Cheng returns. "Father trained you to serve as my deputy, didn't he? And don't say you don't remember, or I'll break your legs."

"Well, yes," Wei Wuxian manages. "Uh. I'll just let Lan Zhan know I'll be at Lotus Pier until you're back at home, then."

Or, the one where Wei Wuxian spends the year before his wedding as Yunmeng Jiang's acting sect leader, and the cultivation world's greatest love story finds its happy ending with the help of three juniors, a teenage romance, and one very involved (and exasperated) younger brother.

Far away you are by cqlorphan

Wangxian, explicit, words: 17 358, chapters: 4/4

post-canon, getting together, misunderstandings, cleared up by juniors ensemble, fluff and smut, explicit consent, blow jobs, anal fingering, multiple orgasms, with a little angst. as a treat

"Suddenly, it snaps into place. The weary way Lan Zhan has been holding himself is suddenly cast in a new, much more distressing light. Somebody is responsible for it, a real live, horrible, blind, stupid person. The combination of guilt, sadness, and anger that sets in all at once is hard to contain. Lingering wisps of resentment that remain from the night-hunt flock to him, like calling to like.

All four boys stare at him with wide eyes.

"Wei-qianbei,” Sizhui says. “You look...um…”

"Scary,” Zizhen breathes, beaming.

"Who has rejected Lan Zhan?” Wei Wuxian asks.

Or, during one of his visits to the Cloud Recesses, the juniors strike a blow to Wei Wuxian's certainty that his feelings for Lan Wangji are one-sided.

The kite string and the anchor rope by fleurdeliser

Wangxian, mature, words: 38 754: chapters: 1/1

alternate universe - canon divergence, set after the yiling date, sick child

When A-Yuan gets sick and Wen Qing doesn't have the supplies she needs to properly treat him, Wei Wuxian can only think of one place to go for help.

Not yet (there as needed) by sunrise_and_death

Wangxian & Lan Sizhui & Jin Ling, teen and up, words: 13 194, chapters: 1/1

post-canon, juniors, family feels, family bonding, yearning, Wei Wuxian and Lan Sizhui figuring out wtf their relationship is, dramatic revelations, Jin Ling being the contrary lil bean he is, all the juniors thinking Wei Wuxian is the greatest thing to ever happen to them

"As always, he arrives with no forewarning. One second, Lan Sizhui and the others are struggling against the hordes of resentful spirits created by some villagers’ accidental disruption of an ancient burial ground—far more spirits than had been initially reported, far more than they had been prepared for—and the next, he’s there, striding fearlessly into the mix, the sound of Chenqing piercing the air.

Or: A meditation on family and the merits of communication, courtesy of Lan Sizhui.

*Update July 24th*

Look not with the eyes by Spodumene

Wangxian, general, words: 28 193, chapters: 1/1

case fic, attempt at humor, fluff and humor, love confessions, idiots in love, there was only one bed, post-canon, canon-typical violence, original character death(s)

Wei Wuxian returns from his travels to join Lan Wangji on a routine night hunt, but when things take an unexpected turn, Wei Wuxian will have to fight for what he's really looking for.

蓝色生死恋 A blue love (to live and to die for) by yiqie

Wangxian, mature, words: 24 898, chapters: 1/1

graphic depictions of violence, post-canon, wedding fic, psychological trauma, empathy, Wangxian are engaged yet somehow still yearning: it's more likely than you think

"Wei Wuxian separates his life, without noticing, into three chapters. Some days, they’re hard to look at, hard to read, harder to know he wrote all of them himself. Some of the words are in blood."

Postcanon cql+novel verse where lwj and wwx conduct empathy so lwj can see the good, the bad, and the ugly of wwx’s descent arc as yiling laozu.

Bailuobo by PhoenixRisesOnceMore

Wangxian, teen and up, words: 1 670, chapters: 1/1

post-canon, the Cloud Recesses rabbits, Wei Wuxian’s emotional baggage, canon compliant, established relationship, grief/mourning, post-canon life in the Cloud Recesses, the effects of replacing your golden core with the resentment of the dead, rabbit funerals, best boy Sizhui, animal death

"There is a thing that lurks at the corner of his mind, disturbing the flow of his thought; it is something that he is certain he used to be able to avoid, leaving him forgetful and free. When life came to find him again he thought death might have freed him of it for good. But that wasn’t true. And today, for whatever reason, it has punched its way into the world and taken the form of a white rabbit with a black splotch on its face."

In the Cloud Recesses after the events of canon, Wei Wuxian finds himself confronting life, death, grief, and regret at an impromptu rabbit funeral.

Song by WithBroomBefore

My earlier post on this fic.

Part 1 of The Quartet

WWX & LWJ & JC & JZX, Wangxian, teen and up, words: 41 215, chapters: 14/14

alternate universe - canon divergence, friends to lovers, first kiss, Wei Wuxian's canonical comfort with the prospect of his own death, hurt/comfort, Jin Zixuan makes friends, canon-typical violence, temporary major character death, Jiang Cheng keeps his golden core, fix-it, minor character death, murder road trip, implied sexual content, platonic group soulbonding, Sunshot Campaign, telepathy, found family, minor Jiang Yanlí/Wen Qíng, nonbinary Nie Huaisang

"Wei Wuxian almost does not catch the name of the song."

In which the aftermath of the cave battle involves just enough communication to make a difference.

Harmony by WithBroomBefore

Part 2 of The Quartet

WWX & LWJ & JC & JZX, background Wangxian, teen and up, words: 27 753, chapters: 9/9

Sunshot Campaign, alternate universe - canon divergence, platonic group soulbond, canon-typical violence, extremely temporary major character death, minor character death, siblings, sworn brothers, family, fix-it, murder road-trip part 2, aroace Jin Zǐxuan, nonbinary Nie Huaisang, everyone/therapy, minor Jiang Yanlí/Wen Qíng, background Lan Xichen/Meng Yao, background Jiang Cheng/Nie Mingjue

The soulbonded team of Jin Zixuan, Jiang Cheng, Wei Wuxian, and Lan Wangji return to Qishan to finish the Sunshot Campaign.

Direct sequel to Song.

*Posted July 23rd*

爱不释手 Never let me go by yigie

Wangxian, explicit, words: 68 713, chapters: 1/1

graphic depictions of violence, the Junior quartet, all the clan leaders, literally so many OCs, case fic, blood and injury, demons, body horror, mystery, the intrinsic horniness of wound tending, yearning, wangxian get-together, cql post-canon

"Wei Wuxian has certainly hoped so ardently in his two lifetimes, for so many different things, in so many different ways, that he could have summoned the demon to his front door with his bare hands. His eyes wander to Lan Zhan, settle on the back of his head, the blue-black curtain of his hair. Oh, how he has hoped."

To arrive late is better than not to arrive at all by Moominmammashandbag

Wangxian, explicit, words: 34 900, chapters: 24/24

angst with a happy ending, soulmates, chronic illness, not actually unrequited love, hanahaki disease, but as a curse, Lan Wangji says fuck, feelings realization, obsession with interior design, fluff and smut, family angst, Lan Xichen says fuck, wedding, Lan Qiren was in love once too, sect politics

"Lan WangJi is not sure he can bear meeting with a matchmaker yet again, but at the same time, if he wasn’t going to care deeply about the person he was going to marry, he could just as well have settled for Wei Wuxian six years ago ."

or, Lan WangJi goes to a Discussion Conference and his soulmate is there. His soulmate, whom he doesn't love.

The vermillion ribbon by Unforth

My earlier post on this fic.

Wangxian, explicit, words: 233 368, chapters: 50/50

graphic depictions of violence, alternate canon, Wen Clan Wei Wuxian, minor character death, off-screen torture, implied/referenced rape/non-con (not between LWJ and WWX), politics, Sunshot Campaign, slow burn, protective Wen Qíng, enemies to friends to lovers, marriage of convenience, hurt/comfort, love letters, mutual pining, panic attacs, PTSD, aftermath of torture, suicidal thoughts, miscommunication, blow jobs, anal sex, loss of virginity, light bondage, mildly dubious consent, angst with a happy ending, background Jiang Cheng/Wen Qíng, background Nie Huaisang/Wen Níng, background Jiang Yanlí/Jin Zixuan, background Song Lan/Xiao Xingchen

When Wen Chao and his entourage arrived in Cloud Recesses, Lan Wangji saw that all the things he'd been told about the arrogance of the Wen clan were true. Wen Qing was aloof, Wen Ning was distant, and Wei Wuxian?

Disrespectful, cocky, self-centered Wei Wuxian was the worst.

Lead me on through by mrsronweasley

Wangxian, explicit, words: 54 673, chapters 4/4

alternate universe, arranged marriage, practice kissing, practice other things, horny boys in love, questionable logic, questionable choices, they're dumb but cute

"Who do you think your betrothed is?" Wei Wuxian asks, sprawling out in front of Lan Zhan and enjoying the prim thinning of his lips at the question. He shouldn't be sprawling—they're in the library, for one, and Lan Zhan is studying, for another—but he can't help himself. Wei Wuxian is a sprawler.

"I do not believe this to be of importance," Lan Zhan responds, without turning his gaze away from his book.

"What!" Wei Wuxian sits up. "How can you say that? Of course it's important! This is the person you'll be with for the rest of your life, Lan Zhan."

And I will go this way by detention_notes

Wangxian, teen and up, words: 24 552, chapters: 10/10

romance, feelings realization, love letters, epistolary, mutual pining, slow burn, drunken flirting, implied sexual content, fluff and humor, marriage

"Ah, what else to say...this will be a quick letter, as I want to send it off before I head out in the morning. Of course there’s too much to express—especially when I lack the gorgeous poetry of your voice, which you’ll be pleased to know has prevented my peaceful rest on many a night. It is wrong enough that you lay beyond the edge of the clouds, and I lay alone under feverish rain. I can only hope that I also disrupt your evenings, else life would be far too unfair.

Your Wei Ying "

Between parting and reuniting on a mountainside, wei ying and lan zhan exchange love letters.

Loyaulte me lie by Justkeeptrekkin

Xiyao, explicit, words: 72 246, chapters: 6/6

slow burn, hurt/comfort, fluff, alternate universe - canon divergence, canonically awful JGS, Meng Yao makes friends, smut, offscreen Wangxian

Meng Yao arrives at the Cloud Recesses as Nie-gongzi's attendant. Zewu-Jun allows him to stay for the lectures. There's something about this place, and the man who rules it, that triggers an irrevocable change in him.

And so, Meng Yao sees two paths unfold before him: one that leads him towards power, and one that leads him somewhere completely different.

All the depths of me, real by northofallmusic (tofsla)

Part 1 of All the depths of us

Wangxian, explicit, words: 15 508, chapters: 1/1

alternate universe - canon divergence, CQL ep 35-40, getting together, rough sex, tender sex, canon-typical lack of self-preservation

Wei Wuxian is dealing with a curse a little worse than he'd like to let on, and Lan Zhan is a little less than willing to let it slide.

Balancing acts by northofallmusic (tofsla)

Part 2 of All the depths of us

Wangxian, mature, words: 646, chapters: 1/1

pre-relationship, alternate POV, unresolved sexual tension, misunderstandings, Lan Wangji's lingering fear of his own desires

Wei Ying does not know that Lan Wangji is insatiable.

Alternate POV on a failed seduction attempt from "all the depths of me, real"

Hunters seeking solid ground by Attila

Wangxian, explicit, words: 23 633, chapters 1/1

canon compliant, discussion of canon character death, hurt/comfort, nightmares, bed sharing, yearning, getting together

“Hanguang-jun,” Wei Wuxian repeats. His heart clenches. He wants—but he’d really meant to have this nightmare stuff down before they met again, so he wouldn’t find himself relying on Lan Wangji’s nearness. He’s not supposed to go back yet. But he’s so tired, and his will crumbles. “Yeah,” he says. “All right. Take me back to Gusu with you.”

#mdzs fanfic #cql fanfic #the untamed #mo dao zu shi #wangxian fanfic #xiyao fanfic #resources #mine #reblogs of this post are always tagged as #update reblog!

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the-ghost-king · 3 years

Text

Schizophrenic Nico, here's why I think it's possible:

I want to start off by saying these are just my thoughts, there is no one way to be schizophrenic or to have schizophrenia. It's also important to note that many of the schizophrenic symptoms overlap with other mental illnesses/nuerodivergences like ADHD, Autism, Depression, and OCD which I know many people who head canon Nico as having. I'm not arguing schizophrenic Nico is more correct, more canon, or more right, but to explain some thoughts on why I think it's possible/very likely he does so I can use this for future reference in various thing.

I am using the term schizophrenia as a catchall for all "types" of schizophrenia, but not for schizoaffective disorder which I would say Nico probably doesn't have.

Children born in the winter/those who were "sickly" as babies are more likely to develop schizophrenia. It may also be possible if your mother was sick while pregnant with you, or having a father who was significantly older when he had you.

A stressful life, especially trauma, are more likely to develop schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder. It likely has something to do with excessive dopamine production, but it may also have something to do with the same genes that control the sleep-wake cycle. Schizophrenia is more common with other mental illnesses or with other nuerodivergences or developmental delays.

Common symptoms include:

Hallucinations

Delusions

Disorganized thinking

lack of motivation

slow movement

change in sleep patterns

poor grooming or hygiene

changes in body language and emotions

less interest in social activities

Now what does this mean for Nico, and why do I think it's likely he has Schizophrenia?

Let's start with Nico's childhood, "children born in the winter/those who were "sickly" as babies are more likely to develop schizophrenia". Although Rick proposed two birthdays for Nico, the fandom generally accepted the January date more fully. We also know that Nico is described as small when he was younger, smallness is common in children who grow up sickly, but it is also common in children who's mother was ill while pregnant with them. We obviously don't know if Nico was sick as a kid, or if Maria was sick while pregnant with him, but again being born in the winter makes these things more likely, as well as consideration for the time period Nico grew up in and the larger variety of illnesses going around at the time. (He is vaccinated against some things though).

Trauma and Nico... do I really have to go into super detail on this one? He spent his childhood growing up in a fascist country that was extremely racist/anti-Semitic/homophobic/etc, his mom died when he was a child- in front of him, his father intentionally gave him amnesia, his sister died when he was a child, he then proceeded to become homeless living/spending lots of time with Minos who verbally (and possibly physically) abused him, becoming aware of his past memories, becoming aware of the fact that many people hated him because of his father and because they thought he was joining the other side (therefore, he was "bad"), he fought in many battles as a child, fought monsters alone, was often faced with life or death situations, went to Tartarus alone (where the goddess of misery told him he was "perfect"), was trapped in a hostage situation with little/no air for a long time while people debated whether or not to save him, was outed against his will, was freed only to travel again fighting monsters and then win a battle, was eventually made to quest with Apollo despite still having lots of healing to do in ToN. So stressful life? Fuck yeah, that doesn't being to cover it.

Genetic factors, obviously nothing here is confirmed so I'm speculating a little bit again, but the common idea in regards to Hades children through the series is that they are "bad". Mental illnesses have been stigmatized for hundreds, if not thousands of years, and often mentally ill people were made out to be weird/bad/etc. It's more than possible there is some sort of genetic factor taking place, also "having a father who was significantly older when he had you". Although I doubt godly genes work the same as mortal ones (trust me I have lots of thoughts on how god genetics/DNA work, but that's not the point right now), I think Hades being the oldest out of all his brothers and having a reputation for having "questionable" children says something... We have no information on Maria's family history at all.

As for schizophrenia often occurring with other mental illnesses and/or neurodivergences: Nico canonically is implied to have either ADHD and/or Autism, and is canonically stated to have PTSD. I think most people would agree that saying Nico has or has had depression isn't a stretch in the slightest.

So canonically we can all agree Nico has severe trauma and coinciding mental health issues/neurodivergences, so out of 4 possible issues I’ve first presented we guaranteeably have two. If I wanted to stretch this a little I would give myself a half point for him being born in the winter and a half point for the aspect of Hades genetics but I won’t do that.

On top of that schizophrenia usually appears during teenage and young adult years in people who receive diagnosis; most people live with mental illness for a few months or a few years in some cases before they're able to receive a diagnosis. Nico being 15 (16 by the end of ToN/shortly following the end of ToN) is about the age that schizophrenia would start to make an appearance. It's also more likely to be found in men, with men also noticing the appearance of schizophrenia appearing early in their lives, and experiencing more negative symptoms in comparison to the higher commonality of affective symptoms in women. That's a really complicated explanation to basically say there's 3 more things that would make Nico having schizophrenia make more sense.

Alright, let’s go back to the list of symptoms I provided:

Hallucinations

Delusions

Disorganized thinking

lack of motivation

slow movement

change in sleep patterns

poor grooming or hygiene

changes in body language and emotions/behavior

less interest in social activities

Once again, some of these are not solely related to schizophrenia and can be the result of other mental health issues, I’m just going to go down the list and add in some moments from the books in which Nico shows some of these traits/behaviors.

Delusions/Hallucinations (more later)

Our best chances for understanding Nico's thought process is in Blood of Olympus where he has a P.O.V... Sometimes Nico's thoughts do derail, or sometimes they get a little confusing, but not always, and when talking to others he is consistent and aware of what he's saying, as well as blunt. Anything "off" about his thought patterns to me just seems like ADHD..

Dietary changes (whether or not you think he has an eating disorder) are behavioral changes (I personally think Nico has AFRID)

Within House of Hades Nico's poor sleep patterns are constantly referenced, and I'll give him a pass on poor hygiene because he's in the middle of a quest but still..

I have extremely complicated feelings on what Will says here, it's possible Nico is an extremely unreliable narrator (unlikely, it seems many people are bothered by him and only maybe a handful aren't), I've also thought at many points this was Rick trying to backtrack some stuff with Nico because he realized he'd made his story a little too harsh for a kids book, it could also be Will's trauma kicking in and that happening... I'm not counting it as full proof about Nico disliking social interactions, but Nico does try to leave even after this conversation and isn't convinced to stay until the last chapter, so maybe there's something to be said about people's dislike of him for being a Hades kid- but I think it's fair to say Nico also dislikes people at least some because he doesn't have interest in trying to befriend anyone either, and is quick to assume all people dislike him (paranoia/low self esteem/and some other possible stuff). There's lots of discussions to be had about this quote and other similar ones, and I don't think a broad brush approach of "Nico good everyone else bad" is accurate it's more, "Nico is good but he fails to try and you have to work on your own mental health everyone won just go to you, and also people dislike Nico for silly reasons and need to get over themselves and make an effort too". (I'm extremely oversimplifying my thoughts and feelings to keep it brief.)

More on delusions and hallucinations:

Now I want to state that lots of schizophrenia symptoms share a lot of commonalities with ADHD and with depression, so although I might include some moments you think are just ADHD/depression I wouldn’t necessarily disagree with you but they could also be schizophrenia or coexisting mental health issues/divergences. I also went through the DSM-5 for schizophrenia (the DSM-5 is just this big book with lists and it’s how doctors diagnose any mental health issue/divergence), I also looked through the DSM-IV (an older book from before DSM-5 which is no longer really used) and the differences between the diagnosis was fairly minimal but they quit categorizing types of schizophrenia and instead rely more on a couple of word descriptions that seem more in line with a spectrum rather than a checkable box.

In order to receive a schizophrenia diagnosis, two (or more) of the following, each present for a significant portion of time during a 1-month period (or less if successfully treated), and at least one of these symptoms must be (1), (2), or (3):

Delusions

Hallucinations

Disorganized speech (frequent derailment or incoherence)

Grossly disorganized or catatonic behavior

Negative symptoms (i.e., diminished emotional expression or avolition).

It’s important to note that only one of these need to be checked off/true if the patient has voices which narrate their actions/behaviors/thoughts or if the person has more than one voice conversing with each other.

Nico deals with auditory hallucinations (2), he believes the voice belongs to Bob, his titan friend he left in Tartarus:

However this isn’t and immediate diagnosis because Bob’s voice doesn’t talk to another voice(s) in Nico’s head, and we don’t know if Nico has voices running commentary on his behaviors/thoughts.

The reason I state we are unaware if Nico has commentary isn’t because Nico hasn’t said anything, but because many people with schizophrenia before their diagnosis believe the narrative voices are just their thoughts and are a normal internal monologue- usually patients don’t realize anything is wrong until the voices start providing commentary on their actions so instead of “washing the dishes now” the voice(s) might say “wash the dishes now, you’re so lazy you can’t do anything, idiot” during a period of psychosis which may help them acknowledge that the voice(s) isn’t the way most people experience internal voice(s). It is very possible Nico is unaware he is experiencing narrative thoughts and simply assumes that his experience is something most people have, but I won’t use this to argue my point because it’s not confirmation of anything.

Returning now to Bob, Nico knows he is hearing Bob’s voice but he believes Bob is calling to him from Tartarus. Now, Nico says the voices are calling to him from Tartarus but there’s no confirmation of this anywhere… What I think is happening is Nico has a guilty conscience. He feels bad for “using” Bob to get out of Tartarus and various other things, so he feels bad that he is still down there. However, we don’t really know if Bob is calling to him or if Bob is able to do that- what I personally think is happening here is Nico’s brain is convincing Nico that Bob needs him because Nico is upset with himself for not helping Bob more, but also because Nico has never “sat still” before without a quest. Nico has also always felt the want to be needed/important...

It very well could be a delusion.

Schizophrenic patients often experience delusions which make them think they are destined for greatness, or that they have some divine/high force calling out to them for help that only they can provide. It’s an extremely common thing in individuals who experience delusions, and is in fact one of the most common delusions experienced. So although Bob could really be calling out to Nico, I don’t think he is, it doesn’t entirely make sense and there’s lots of little things which point to it being not entirely real- like the fact that nobody else knows about it? Or how absolutely sure Nico is that he need to return to Tartarus? It seems like a mixture of PTSD, delusions, and trauma response (returning to the trauma), working against him. I’ll say delusion is very likely (1).

Using these two factors alone there’s sufficient evidence for diagnosis, but let’s keep going just to see.

For disorganized speech (3) this isn’t something Nico seems to struggle with, and even if he did “derailing” could be ADHD or Autism, so I don’t think this symptom pertains to him.

Changes in behavior (4), seem to all be explainable via depression and/or PTSD- he has begun to express emotion again in Tower of Nero upon learning of Jason’s death he is said to be upset by Will and he walks off to be alone, seems like depression to me. Emotional/Behavior changes from schizophrenia tend to relate more to bipolar disorder rather than a depressive disorder, so I would say if Nico has schizophrenia he probably doesn’t have emotional or behavioral changes from it. If he did he might have some catatonic behavior, but this seems to be clearing up some in Tower of Nero so I’m not super sure on that, maybe during bad periods of psychosis behavioral changes occur, but I would lean more towards this isn’t a symptom Nico personally deals with. Negative symptoms (5) tie into this same idea, it’s possible it’s schizophrenia, but it’s more likely PTSD or depression at work.

So why do I care so much about the possibility of Nico being schizophrenic?

I feel like canonically/fanonically making Nico schizophrenic does a few things, firstly schizophrenic rep in media is extremely extremely awful- can you think off the top of your head of a schizophrenic character who isn't from a horror film/a murder/a villain in their own story? Maybe, but personally I can only think of one which is Charlie from Perks of Being a Wallflower- and even then? That's not canon, it's only implied- and it might not even be true

Schizophrenic media representation always paints schizophrenic people as bad, scary, and evil, and although the horror genre is extremely well known for being super ableist, transphobic, racist, homophobic, and misogynistic (just the final cherry on top) having one of the first- if not the first openly confirmed schizophrenic characters in children's media not only be someone who has lots of character development, and isn't a stereotype, but also be someone people have grown up with, cared for, and sympathized with- would be extremely monumental.

People with schizophrenia and other related disorders aren't something to be scared of or to think of as bad, and often times they're more bothered by whatever they're experiencing than you are.

I don't have schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder or anything like that, but I have various undiagnosed mental health issues which often lead to me questioning reality, or having to set aside time to convince myself that no there isn't a man living in my wall... Having a character have to question those things, work through those feelings, and learn to trust themselves and care for themselves even with those difficulties would be really great to see in media, not just for people with schizophrenia but also for people with similar/related disorders who might share symptoms see parts of their own struggles in a good, educative way.

I have to finish this in two parts because tumblr keeps breaking because there's too many words in my post lmao (2nd part here)

#nico di angelo #pjo #hoo #toa #percy jackson #will solace #solangelo

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justanoutlawfic · 6 years

Text

I'll put my future in you: A Charming Family Ficlet

I want to preface this by saying, major mentions of miscarriage and infertility in this. It goes into depth with the infertility potion that George gave Snow in Lady of the Lake. I love Baby Neal, he is amazing. However, @loboselinaistrash and I were discussing the price the lake water comes with. We believed that after Emma and Neal, Snow would never be able to get pregnant again. They were both miracles. I got an even more heartbreaking idea of what if Emma was the only miracle. What if after the curse broke, they could never get pregnant again?

Set in a canon divergence from the end of 3A forward. Pan's spell never had to be reversed, they all stayed in Storybrooke going forward.

Also on AO3

I'll whisper quietly I'll give you nothing but truth If you're not inside me I'll put my future in you-Ed Sheeran

Snow had always known that she wanted to be a mom. She was the little girl that played with dolls, her parents always bought her many. She played mommy to them, dressed them and never let them go. George taking her away her ability to have them, broke her heart. Yet, Ruth sacrificed her own life and made sure that the dream would come true.

Emma was beautiful, smart and incredibly strong. She was a perfect mix of both Snow and David, from her blonde hair to her green eyes. There were even the small things like Snow’s chin and David’s smile. She was kind, sarcastic and stubborn, the kind of person who fought for the underdog. Snow couldn’t be prouder.

It had been a year since the curse broke, a year since Neverland. In that moment, she had said she wanted another baby but after talking it through with David, they realized they needed to wait. They had to build a bond with Emma, make sure she knew they weren’t replacing her. They always planned on having more children, even if they had raised her. The confession hadn’t come out in the way that Snow wanted it to and she knew that there was work to be done.

So, they did it. They spent the year after Neverland fighting Zelena, but bonding too. They all learned a lot about each other and Emma even started calling them mom and dad on a permanent basis. They were a family and it was time to add to it.

Snow assumed it would be easy. She was technically 58, but she was also in the body of a 30 year old woman. She was extremely healthy, worked out and ate well. David had gotten her pregnant once, why should they have trouble doing so again?

It turned out she was half right. She got pregnant within their second month of trying and they were over the moon. Even Emma, who had time to adjust to the idea of a sibling, was so incredibly excited. They announced it at their anniversary party and soon, the town was abuzz. The epitome of true love would be having another child. Would they have magic like Emma? Who would they look like?

Alas, it wasn’t meant to be. Snow went in for an appointment and found that her baby no longer had a heartbeat. It came out of nowhere and was a low hit to her. David held her while she cried, clearly crying himself. Emma mourned the loss too, of the little sibling that she could’ve had. They stayed a bit closer knit after that. Henry spent a bit more time with Regina, knowing that his grandparents really needed the space.

Two months later, they tried again. This time, they were more cautious. They didn’t even tell Emma, they were going to wait until she was halfway through the second trimester before they said a word and as it turned out, they were wise to do so. Snow had some cramping two weeks after finding out and by the time they got to the hospital, there was nothing that could be done.

The third miscarriage was for a pregnancy that Snow didn’t even know about. They weren’t even going to try again so soon, they needed a break. However, one day she was teaching when she doubled over in pain and found blood dripping down her leg. At the hospital, she was told that she was experiencing an ectopic pregnancy. They had to remove the fallopian tube that the egg had gone into, in order to save her.

It had been a year since they had started the process. A year with three pregnancies, along with three miscarriages and one surgery. Snow and David needed answers. They went to the doctor and both went through lots of tests-of both the scientific and magical kind once Dr. Montgomery heard that Snow had once ingested an infertility potion. Three days later, they were called in for the results.

“So, David, you are fine,” Dr. Montgomery told the couple that rainy afternoon. “There should be no reason why you wouldn’t be able to get a healthy woman pregnant.”

David squeezed his wife’s hand. “Snow is healthy.”

She nodded. “She is. She exercises, has cut alcohol out of her diet.”

“I’ve also been taking vitamins like crazy,” Snow added. “And I drink about 8 glasses of water a day.”

“Well, that is no longer the medical standard, but I appreciate it,” Dr. Montgomery said with a small smile. “Snow, you can get pregnant, that is clear. However, I am afraid that your body will never be able to carry a pregnancy to term.”

A slow frown inched across Snow’s face. “But I did, before. With Emma.”

“I reviewed the records there.” She flipped through the files. “Emma was born a month early, correct.”

“Yes.”

“I did some research into the infertility potion that George used. There are several, but I did some research into where he was and what would be available. While you were able to heal yourself with the water, all magic does come with a price.”

“What does that mean?”

“You’ll never be able to carry a pregnancy to full term. To be perfectly honest with you, Snow, the fact that Emma was born at 8 months gestation is a bit of a miracle in itself.”

Tears pricked Snow’s eyes. She had lost Emma for 28 years, but the thought that she could’ve lost her before she was even born tore her apart inside. “So…I can never have another baby?”

“You can continue trying, but I wouldn’t advise it. Now that you’re down to one fallopian tube, that’s going to drastically change your odds of even getting pregnant.”

“There has to be something we can do,” David interjected, his voice breaking a bit. “A potion? A treatment? This was caused by magic, surely that can fix it.”

“I’m sorry, but there is nothing. If this was something purely scientific, I could suggest medical solutions, but there just are none. I’ve exhausted every option. I really didn’t want this to be the answer for you two, trust me.”

Emma sat at the kitchen table, tapping her pen against the wood. Her parents and Henry had been encouraging her to get her GED. She wanted to go to college at some point and it was the only way, short of night school. The practice tests were hard, though. She had dropped out of high school in the beginning of her junior year and that had been over 14 years ago.

The door opened and shut, her parents walking inside. She was about to ask how the appointment went, but Snow shuffled past the stairs and immediately went to bed. Emma saw her father’s face. That past year, she had seen them cry and go through utter turmoil. It was so hard to see them not be able to get what they wanted. She was devastated about the little siblings that she had lost, sometimes wondering how she could love them so much when she never even met them.

In that moment, however, her father looked even more devastated. He had clearly been crying. She got out of her chair, wrapping her arms around him. He hugged her tight, possibly tighter than he ever had before. He cradled the back out of her head and she could hear a sob escape his lips. She was still adjusting to all the hugs, but that past year especially, they had been clinging tighter to her. Emma understood completely, they were worried about losing her…again.

“Dad,” she whispered after a bit. “What happened?”

David pulled away, cupping her cheek and looking at her as if she were the most precious thing in the world. “Your mom won’t be able to have more kids.”

“But she’s been able to get pregnant.”

“She won’t be able to carry to term. That’s the price of the magic of the lake water she drank.”

“She had me, though…”

David smile in spite of his tears. “You were our miracle, Emma. You came at 8 months, which still wasn’t full term.”

Emma shook her head. “If she could carry me that long, surely she could another baby…” Her father shook his head and Emma could feel her throat catching. “But that’s…that’s not fair. You two want a baby. It’s all you’ve talked about this past year.”

“These things happen,” he whispered. “But hey, we have each other.” He kissed her forehead. “I really think your mom could use a quiet day with us. I know you were studying…”

“No, it’s fine. Let’s go be with Mom.”

“Dad,” she whispered after a bit. “What happened?”

David pulled away, cupping her cheek and looking at her as if she were the most precious thing in the world. “Your mom won’t be able to have more kids.”

“But she’s been able to get pregnant.”

“She won’t be able to carry to term. That’s the price of the magic of the lake water she drank.”

“She had me, though…”

David smile in spite of his tears. “You were our miracle, Emma. You came at 8 months, which still wasn’t full term.”

“These things happen,” he whispered. “But hey, we have each other.” He kissed her forehead. “I really think your mom could use a quiet day with us. I know you were studying…”

“No, it’s fine. Let’s go be with Mom.”

Emma didn’t accept the answer that her parents gave her. She spent the rest of the day letting Snow hug her as tight as she wanted, she didn’t once complain. The next day, though, she snuck out early in the morning. It was her day off and she had a lot of work to do. She borrowed books from Rumpelstiltskin, Regina and Belle, going to Granny’s where she poured over each and every single one. She’d find a cure, she just had to.

Unfortunately, every book said the same thing. There was nothing that could be done. The lake water had a price. Even if her grandmother had taken it, something else would’ve happened. Her standard of living would’ve decreased and she would’ve suffered. The water wasn’t a be all, end all. In some ways, it was like a temporary band aid.

Emma was so frustrated. She had to find a way to help her parents. They had lost out on time with her and now, they couldn’t even have a chance to raise a baby from the start. It wasn’t fair. Slowly, she found herself becoming desperate. There had to be a way, some way, any way.

She was so desperate, for a minute she didn’t even think about her own child. She came up with a solution that wouldn’t give them a new baby…but maybe a second chance with the child they already had.

If only someone would help her with it. There was nothing about it any of the books that she read. She knew she couldn’t tell Regina, she would try to talk her out of it. She was so desperate, she went to the last person she thought she could trust.

Blue simply shook her head. “It can’t be done.”

“That’s bull shit,” Emma seethed, placing her hands on the counter of the front desk at the convent.

“You’re in a church, Emma.”

“I don’t give a shit. I saw what you did with August. He’s a kid again, you did that. You could do that for me.”

“August wasn’t human to begin with. The spell I did on him was only possible, because he had once been a puppet. It’s why I couldn’t make him an adult again.”

“I know you’re lying!” Emma thundered. “You could do this! If you really wanted to, but you just don’t!” Tears poured down her face. “My parents are good people! They’re heroes, they…they gave up everything for this town. You lied to them, you owe them!”

Emma wiped at her face. She couldn’t believe that she was begging Blue of all people.

“Please,” her voice came out in the whisper for the first time since she arrived. “Do this for them. I know this will change everything, but I don’t care about me. It’s about what they deserve.”

Blue was quiet for a moment before taking her wand and using it to conjure up a box. She held it out and Emma accepted it.

“What’s in here? A potion?”

“No. I was being honest when I told you there’s nothing I can do. However, I can give you this. It’s the baby pictures your adoptive family had of you.”

“Is it going to burst into flames when I leave here?”

Blue rolled her eyes. “No.”

Emma didn’t know what to say. She still didn’t believe Blue, but she also knew on some level that maybe it was for the best. She couldn’t do this to Henry, she couldn’t do this to herself.

By the time Emma walked through the door of the loft, the sun had long set in the sky and the crickets were chirping. Snow jumped up from the couch and ran to her, throwing her arms tightly around her. Emma was taken off guard for a moment, but then returned the hug.

“Where the hell have you been?!?” Snow asked, tightening her grip. “You’ve been gone on all day. We heard you were at Granny’s, so we went there but by the time we arrived, you were gone. We thought…God, you can’t just take off like that. Adult or not, we need to know where you are!”

Emma felt a singe of guilt hit her heart.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I was just trying to do something.”

“What was more important than answering your phone?”

“I was trying to fix things.”

“Fix things?”

“The price of the lake water.”

Snow pulled away from her, eyes wide. David joined his wife, looking a mixture of shocked and crestfallen.

“Emma, the doctor said there’s nothing that can be done,” he said, softly.

“I know that now. So, then I went to Blue.”

Snow’s eyes went even wider. “Emma! We told you to stay away from her!”

“I just had to ask her for help. I know Regina and Rumple wouldn’t, but she had done it for August, so maybe she could for me.”

“Did it for August…what…” She trailed off. “Emma, no.”

“But she said no,” Emma rambled on, ignoring her mother’s shocked face. “I don’t know if she really can’t do it or if she won’t, but she can’t fix it. I’m sorry. I know you two wanted a baby. You deserve one. I was your miracle and you couldn’t even raise me. You’re stuck with me, an adult…I know I’m not what you wanted and I just...I’m so sorry.”

David and Snow exchanged a look, before both of them pulled Emma into their arms. David cradled the back of Emma’s head and Snow placed her hand on top of his. She pressed a kiss to Emma’s cheek.

“Emma, you are everything we wanted,” Snow said.

“But a baby…”

“You are our baby. Yes, we wanted another child and we are heartbroken you’ll never be a big sister…but it doesn’t change that you’re our baby too.”

“I’m an adult.”

“No matter how old you get, you will always be our baby,” David said. “And even if you’re not one physically, we wouldn’t change who you are or how you are. We’re a family. Nothing is going to change that.”

“This isn’t what you wanted.”

“We wanted a child and that’s you.” Snow pulled away and put her hands on Emma’s cheeks. “You are my baby girl, my miracle. My heart is aching right now, but I am already a mother. I would not trade you for anything in the world.”

Tears were falling down all their faces as they rejoined the hug. They didn’t pull away for quite some time. When they did, they went through the box that Blue had given Emma. They saw the tiny baby that slowly grew through the progression. From rolling over to first steps. There were even some video tapes. They stayed cuddled up on the couch together, staying up way later than they normally would, catching up on lost time.

It took months for them to adjust to the news. Emma would still occasionally look for a cure, but eventually she gave up. Her father had once told her to look for the moments and she would. Snow and David would never be over that they could never have more children, but they tried to focus on what they did. They had a handsome grandson, a woman that was once their enemy was family again and as she formed a new relationship, they were gaining a nephew of sorts with Roland.

More importantly, they had Emma. She was their baby girl, their miracle. She had been sent to save so many people, but more importantly, she had saved them. She made them a family. No matter what life had in store, as long as they had her, they were going to be okay.

#tw: miscarriage #tw: infertility #snowing #snowing au #charming family #charming family au #daddy charming #daddy charming au #mama snow #mama snow au #snow swan #snow swan au #charming swan #charming swan au

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serenagaywaterford · 5 years

Note

1) Okay, I'm late (bc rl sucks), but I'm back and I'll gradually address everything. "Also do not feel any pressure to respond to my multiple essays! I understand completely!"The same goes to you, bc I feel like I'm bothering you too much. That being said, I truly enjoy talking to you. Not only you offer fresh/perceptive insights into the characters' minds (which made me a. reconsider scenes and motives, b. wanna rewatch S1 --some scenes you're commenting on are SO fuzzy in my head-- mind you,

2) 2) I’m already rereading the book), but you also provide such hilarious, sarcastic lines (some of them are absolute killers).

3) personalities” I know you have an inkling of who’s who. :D But damn, that ‘lesbianing’ bit had me giggling. Kudos, fellow anon. Since we’re on the subject, I have another question about your fic (if you don’t mind): is it post s2 or s1/s2 canon divergent? b) “Add horrid fangirls to that and it’s a big ass no lol.” Ugh. Fandom smh manages to sour my opinion of characters/ships/series I personally like. Especially when fans start pestering the creators to cater to their whims or harass actors

4) or start ship wars. Double ugh. c) “So, that’s the Mass Effect connection!” Two more similarities: i. Mass Effect’s Miranda Lawson got a lot of fandom hate back then (even though she was a famous character), just like Serena. ii. She has a back-and-forth, bickering (hateful but not THAT complex) relationship with another female character. d) “I have seen Westworld! Well, okay, just the first season. I got too tired/confused to get past the 2nd season premiere.” Oh, sorry. I shouldn’t have

5) assumed. Believe me when I say it’s a good thing you stopped watching when you did. The overall quality of the series remained pretty much the same (e.g. acting, cinematography, direction), but, oh boy, some new plot twists (which I usually like) are SO OVER THE TOP in order to impress (?) the audience. It’s reached a point where some characters are unrecognizable, bc they’re servants to the plot. Maeve has a lot bigger arc in S2 and Newton is thriving (imo, S2!Maeve >> S1!Maeve), but so is

6) Strahovski/Serena. :D e) “don’t go around bitching at people who say shitty things or stuff I don’t agree with, or blocking anybody who doesn’t like her."Ah, another thing we have in common. There were times I’ve been blocked by fandom people (with beautiful edits) that I NEVER interacted with (except for maybe reblogging from each other). That’s not me complaining. Like I said, each to their own.I just find this phenomenon funny at times. Story time. Once, an out of nowhere anon (whose msg I

7) didn’t publish, bc drama is SO not my thing) said they’d block me, bc of an uploaded gifset for a canon pairing (which wasn’t to their taste apparently) that was tagged as #[series]edit (although the ship!portmanteau was right there, too, so that people could easily block it). I remember being like: "Okay. Good for you, anon!” LOL. f) “I dunno if you see spoilers but there’s one about them.) She needs therapy so much more than a cutesy feelgood storyline.” I did NOT actually, but feel free to8) enlighten me.

——–

I am sort of back! (RL does get in the way of incredibly lengthy essays about fictional TV shows!) NO APOLOGIES NECESSARY!! I am just so happy I get to read all these excellent thoughts, analyses, and feelings you have! (and that we clearly share lol, including the sheer amusement of your writing!). I really want to write more at the mo but my hands are doing that weird old lady thing where you can see the veins popping out and it makes me v uncomfortable to look at. Especially since I have little baby hands. I hate it.

Ok, I’m now kneeling on the floor and the computer is on the kitchen island. This is better. I cannot see the top of my hands.

SO. Where was I? OW. my kneeeessss. This is a bad idea.

I’m so lost. Fic question. right. It’s post-S2. Like… quite post-S2. I didn’t even deal with HOW or WHY June is back in the Waterford’s house tbh cos I can’t be bothered to sort that out. (Thanks, show.) So, it just assumes that for some reason, she’s back. Which, if the BTS pics/video is to be believed, that’s the case anyway.

Fangirls (and boys ofc) ruin so much for me. Even if I like the same thing initially. Ugh. Then sometimes they’ll annoy me so much that I end up liking the complete opposite of what they like. Dunno why.

No worries about Westworld! It’s a reasonable assumption! Please don’t apologise, my friend. I do agree that Thandie was very good in S1. IIRC, her character was my fav (other than Clementine lol). Yvonne S2 was just next level shit to me. Like, what you’re saying makes me wanna give S2 WW another shot but when shows get overcomplicated, they’re not much fun anymore when I’m like “BUT WHAT IS HAPPENING LOL”.

>> “There were times I’ve been blocked by fandom people (with beautiful edits) that I NEVER interacted with (except for maybe reblogging from each other)”

EXACT SAME. It was actually in THT fandom most recently lol. Like, I reblogged one of their pretty edits once. Ever. I didn’t even say anything snarky or bitchy or rude in tags. I don’t think I added any commentary at all. Next thing I know? BLOCKED. Never interacted with them in any way whatsoever. (Typical N/J fangirl lol.) It’s the strangest behaviour and it’s that kind of thing that sours me towards sects of fangirls, and sometimes even the characters they like. Maybe that’s just petty but I think it actually just reinforces pre-existing feelings I had towards the character or pairing.) The only blogs I block are ones that are gross, RP, or spam. (RP blogs is a long history of them stealing and spamming and adding awful commentary to my posts way back in the day, so I just… block em. lol.)

>> “they’d block me, bc of an uploaded gifset for a canon pairing (which wasn’t to their taste apparently) that was tagged as #[series]edit (although the ship!portmanteau was right there, too, so that people could easily block it). I remember being like: “Okay. Good for you, anon!” LOL.”

Oh. My… WHAT. There’s a very odd sense of entitlement here that seems so peculiar to me. Like, that’s what the blacklisting feature is for? I’ve put every version of my most despised pairings, characters, etc. and it works? Very rarely does it miss on. I guess we’re just dramaphobic, mature old fandom farts. Like, “Kids, let me sit you down and tell you about this site before you could block things. Before even XKit was invented…” Not to mention every other website ever lol.

HOLY GROSS… I just got up and a centipede fell off me!! WHYYYYYY. THIS IS WHY I DON’T SIT ON THE FLOOR. (we live near the beach/woods so we get lots of bugs no matter how clean we are…) no more painful kneeling for me i guess…

OKAY. Spoilers. It’s not much but other than the June in Martha costume (which was shown in the teaser Superbowl trailer anyway by now)… there were set pics of Emily, Sylvia, Nicole, and Luke all happy and smiling. IIRC. I can’t find the post anymore. So it may not have been in character. But I dunno… it all seems… too easy? Like, I’m glad Emily is safe but omg. She’d better not be all hunky dory “I stabbed a lady and threw her down the stairs, murdered another, and ran a dude over with a stolen car, but now I’m Canada, I’m all healed!” (Not including the heart attack/crotch kicking here cos that was fair play to Emily. She deserved that.) Like, honestly, as much part of me was like YESSSS at all of those, still… that’s grievous bodily harm with intent to kill, flat out murder, and vehicular manslaughter. For Emily to do those things, you don’t do those crimes without being really broken and damaged. And… yeah. That doesn’t magically disappear when you hop over a border.

#spoilers #Anonymous

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